Ten Percent Happier with Dan Harris - What To Do When You Get Angry? | Bonus Meditation with Jessica Morey

Episode Date: September 11, 2020

Go from "seeing red" to seeing the value in anger without being carried away by it and doing or saying things you'll regret later. About Jessica Morey: Jess Morey is the executive director an...d lead teacher of Inward Bound Mindfulness Education which runs in-depth mindfulness programming for youth, and the parents and professionals who support them across the US, and internationally. She began practicing meditation at age 14 on teen retreats offered by the Insight Meditation Society (IMS), and has maintained a consistent commitment to meditation since. Diving head first into meditation at such a key developmental stage makes the revelatory perspective of mindfulness & compassion her natural home turf, and gives her an easy, conversational teaching style anyone can relate to. To hear Jess’s meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, click here: https://10percenthappier.app.link/TransformingAngerPod See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 What does it even mean to live a good life? Is it about happiness, purpose, love, health, or wealth? What really matters in the pursuit of a life well lived? These are the questions award-winning author, founder, and interviewer Jonathan Fields asks his guests on the Top Ranked Good Life Project podcast. Every week, Jonathan sits down with world renowned thinkers and doers, people like Glenn and Doyle, Adam Grant,
Starting point is 00:00:23 Young Pueblo, Jonathan Height, and hundreds more. Start listening right now. Look for the Good Life Project on your favorite podcast app. Hey y'all, it's your girl, Kiki Palmer. I'm an actress, singer, and entrepreneur. On my new podcast, Baby This is Kiki Palmer. I'm asking friends, family, and experts the questions that are in my head. Like, it's only fans only bad.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Where did memes come from. And where's Tom from MySpace? Listen to Baby, this is Kiki Palmer on Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcast. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ From ABC, this is the 10% happier podcast. I'm Dan Harris. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪
Starting point is 00:01:03 Hey guys, it's Friday and we're here with a bonus guided meditation and this meditation plays off the conversation I had with Bante Boudrequita on Wednesday's episode. On that show you heard Bante Boudrequita talking about nearly being assassinated. So this meditation is all about working with anger. In the meditation, you're going to learn how to go from seeing red to seeing the value in anger without being carried away by it or saying or doing things you will later regret. Our teacher, Du jour, is Jess Mori, who's the executive director and lead teacher for IBME that's inward bound mindfulness education, which runs in-depth meditation programming for young people and the parents and professionals to support them across the US and internationally.
Starting point is 00:01:54 Jess is also one of the teachers on the 10% happier app. So over to Jess with today's meditation. Hi, this is Jess. Anger is often my go-to emotion in all its various forms. Annoyance, frustration, irritation, indignation. I used to even get angry at my anger, resisting it, trying to push it away. But I've come to see that anger can be a life-affirming emotion. It lets us know when a boundary has been crossed, when our needs are not being met, or when someone we care about is in
Starting point is 00:02:31 danger. Being mindful of anger means not suppressing or avoiding it, and also not acting out in harmful ways. Let's give it a try. Take a few deeper breaths and allow your attention to settle into your body. Invite some softening into your forehead, relax the muscles behind your eyes, soften your jaw, allow your shoulders to drop down away from your ears, and allow your breath to settle into its natural rhythm. Remember, you can always come back to the simple sensations of breathing if this exploration of anger gets overwhelming. If you aren't feeling angry right now, bring to mind a recent situation when you felt
Starting point is 00:03:34 frustrated. The first step of mindfulness of anger is to recognize and respect it. Anger is happening. It's part of the human experience. You can softly name to yourself what you are feeling, noting anger, frustration, irritation. Next, stop feeling the anger with your thoughts and shift your attention into your body. You may need to be really firm about cutting off the story of how you were wronged or why your anger is justified and direct your attention towards the sensations in your body.
Starting point is 00:04:44 Notice where you feel anger in your body. Do you notice contraction or heat in your chest? How does your stomach feel? Do you notice any tightness or heaviness? What do you notice in your jaw? Check out your hands and arms. How do they feel? Scan your body and explore how the experience of anger is showing up right now. And notice how the sensations of anger change as you pay attention to them.
Starting point is 00:05:59 Do they increase or decrease. Notice of the anger feel solid, or is it shifting and changing? As you pay attention to anger with openness and curiosity, reflect on how you could skillfully respond to the situation or person without suppressing or acting out. What would be the most helpful response? And as we close this meditation, see if you can commit to take whatever skillful action
Starting point is 00:06:46 is needed. When you're ready, you can open your eyes and reorient to this face around you. Good luck, and thanks for your practice. Big thanks to Jess Mori. If you're thinking, you know, I really could have kept that going for another five or ten minutes. I encourage you to check out the 10% happier app where you will find this same meditation in different lengths to suit your practice. The price you pay for your subscription supports our wonderful teachers and allows them to dedicate their time to teaching these skills of mindfulness, which can be life-changing.
Starting point is 00:07:26 As an added incentive, we've got a special discount for anybody who's new to the app. To acclaim that discount, you can visit 10% dot com slash bonus. That is 10%, one word all spelled out, dot com slash bonus. And if you're an existing subscriber, we thank you for your support. can listen early and add free with Wondery Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, do us a solid and tell us all about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondery.com slash survey. Raising kids can be one of the greatest rewards of a parent's life. But come on, someday, parenting is unbearable. I love my kid, but is a new parenting podcast
Starting point is 00:08:27 from Wondry that shares a refreshingly honest and insightful take on parenting. Hosted by myself, Megan Galey, Chris Garcia, and Kurt Brown-Oller, we will be your resident, not so expert experts. Each week we'll share a parenting story that'll have you laughing, nodding, and thinking. Oh yeah, I have absolutely been there.
Starting point is 00:08:48 We'll talk about what went right and wrong. What would we do differently? And the next time you step on yet another stray Lego in the middle of the night, you'll feel less alone. So if you like to laugh with us as we talk about the hardest job in the world, listen to, I love my kid, but wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app.

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