Ten Thousand Losses - Blow Me Ishmael

Episode Date: April 24, 2026

The boys talk about the straightest book ever written, never doubting the sixers nor flyers and bring forth maledictions against the Phillies.  Find our bonus episodes and Discord on Patreon. Follow us on Bluesky:  Podcast Liam Tom Shoot a message or leave us a voicemail (leave your name and pronouns): 267-371-7218

He is actually going to eject a fan. Because bad things happen in Philadelphia. Bad things. Joy it is to come to Philadelphia and stand here at Dodge Ice Ball. Dallas Town Boys. Head of Samed. John Cooney. And we're live.

We're live. Hello. Dude, it's 420. I just did a fucking big, huge bong, bong, bong, ripper. Yeah, you sound like you did. I just ripped a huge bong, dude. I fucking just bonged a lot of. of a lot of chief.

It's keef. I chiefed it. You boofed it? You boofed it? I boof and weed. Yeah, put weed on my ass so they can. There's just show up on tests. I'm aroused. Are you?

No, not really. This is low energy today. I don't know what you are you talking about? I'm low energy. I feel like I'm going to sleep. Actually, I actually. I actually went home early today from work. Isn't that nice?

Yeah. Well, no, I had a, I had a migraine, and I just couldn't shake it. And I laid down for like an hour and a half. And then by the time I woke up, I was ready to record with you. I wish I had a migraine today. Why? Because I would, you just go home. I just go home.

I am home, but I want to go home again. You are home. Double home aside. Dude, it's, it's this time of year for school. It's like, I'm fucking done. I just want to go. They're all done. I imagine they're all done.

They're all done. It's like three weeks to Keystones. The Keystone Week is like the demarcation. Then after that it's like fucking as many movies I can fit in. What are we even doing here? I have lesson plans for where we can watch fucking movies. And somehow it still qualifies for English. All right.

Well, we're just going to watch the 2009 Mayo Wolf over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over. Don't get me started on that movie. You don't like it? No. Why? Does Bayelwell fuck Rendell's mom? Yeah. In the story?

Yeah, twice. The chops, the fucking chops her head off. No, he fucks her mom twice. Fuck's your mom twice. Oh, well,

you know what? I'd be honored if I was son of Beowulf. You can't say that. Some shit that's going to make me think that I'm of a child of fucking Beowulf. You know how dangerous that is. Yeah, that's what you're going to get me really amped up into some shit. your ego needs.

I'm going to have a fucking swimming contest in the North Sea. And then when the fucking, the fucking sea monsters come. The anonymous author, the Beowulf poet. Oh, good. Yeah. Have you read, actually read it? Yeah.

Okay. I had to for high school. Yeah. Probably the Haney version. I couldn't tell you. I was on a... Substances. Yeah.

Like a lot of substances as we're all. familiar with. Yeah. It's, I mean, I don't want to, I, I, we start getting to, to this shit. I do, I do want to announce, though, something related to reading. Yeah. I have been Reddit free on my phone for about, uh, two weeks now. It's good.

And I've read like four books. All right. You've gone full matchaplucky. Yeah. I finished, I finished, uh, Confederates in the attic. I finished Phil Plates, Alien Skies. What was the other one?

I was taking forever to read. Oh, I reread the Hobbit. Oh, yeah. Hell yeah. And now I'm on Movi Dick. You are on Mooby Dick. That I know. And holy shit, does, is this for me all got ADHD?

Who can blame them? I mean, every chapter is something different. It's a very straight book. I mean, clearly it's only for straight men. And not for rubbing butts. together or whatever it is. They're literally rubbing foreheads together like cats. I do that.

I did what I did to my cat. Yeah. Do you not do that to your wife? Just come on in and just. Just straight like how a cat just fucking straight ahead. Yeah. You do. Yeah, that like I try to think.

What movie is that, the poster? The notebook where they have their heads together. Yeah. Yeah, just do that all the time in the rain when I'm trying to be really romantic. I imagine she hates that knowing your wife. Hey, she does have affection Believe it or not I believe it

I know that she must have it in there somewhere for you She loves The same exact way She loves playing the hard ass when it's like other people And then I'm just like oh who's like Oopy Goopy little idiot As soon as it's just she's like She's like the whole facade falls

Yeah The what was I saying About reading oh Moby Dick Yeah. There's got to be a recipe out there for the chowder he talks about. I want chowder. I want chowder. He just describes chowder beautifully.

Tripot chowder. Someone has to have to made this recipe from the book. Here he says, however, a warm, savory steam from the kitchen served to belive the apparently cheerless prospect before us. But when that smoking chowder came in, chowda came in. the mystery was delightfully explained oh sweet friends harkened to me it was made of small juicy clams

scarcely bigger than hazelnuts mixed with pounded chips biscuit and salted pork cut up into little flakes the whole enriched with butter and plentifully seasoned with pepper and salt come on I want that and this is a I found a blog that has the as a recipe

you're not on Reddit congratulations I'm not on Reddit I still have it on my phone not my phone on my computer but I have no desire like it's if I'm already on there it gives a shit

I just have to I have a problem though and that's out of the park baseball yeah we're all very worried about you let me look how many hours I've played it since I bought it I haven't played it all this week

I probably want I think I have to actually stay away from it I've played 45 hours in like two weeks. That's pretty crazy, man. Yeah. It's not great.

It's a fun game, but I can't put it down. I'm not going to lie to you. It's fun, fun spreadsheets. But anyway, you're not here to listen to us to talk about Moby Dick or out of the park baseball. Yes, you are.

You're here to listen to us talk about, hello, welcome to another episode of 10,000 losses, the only Philadelphia sports podcast that exists. I'm your host Tom Paine and my pronouns are he, him. And with me as I co-host, yeah. Liam, hi, I'm Liam McAnerson. My pronouns also, he and him.

Actually, for today, call me Ishmael. Oh, that's fine. I'll call you Ishmael. Guests, no guests. Fuck you. No announcements. We do have the schedule a bonus. Oh, and then,

let me see if they respond to it. Is the 23rd? Okay. like that's a normal recording date. Yeah. We're recording us on the Monday folks because the, the boys, the boys will be back,

the TP boys. What time? That's what I'm working out. Is there, is there a time issue there? Like it. No, I can record.

It's fine. No, they're Easter. It's usually like six. They usually record later. Yeah. I'll, if we could go earlier,

that would be good, but they have jobs. So they have jobs. Yeah. So I just message Bobby back today. Maybe like five. 30. Yeah, we'll see what happens.

Well, the end of they listen religiously. So I'm sure that they do. While your loyalty is affecting me. Sorry. Voice mail. Call in 2673717171. 7218. Give us your name and pronouns.

Also, you would do with Moby Dick's penis. I mean, penis bone. Liam has already got the electric screwdriver. It's a visit toy. Which looks like a vape. We've already talked about this. Not a babe. You thought it was a vape once in you?

Yes. Patreon.com slash 10,000 losses for every episode, every vape we have. That would be funny, though, if like our first merch is just a fucking shitty vape. That's a fire. Yeah. Hey, look what it said on the side of it. That's the downfall of the podcast as some kid brings it to school.

I lose my teaching certificate. You would hit a heartbeat, yes. Yes. What we got, polar? Yeah, did you see they change their like cans? Can label? No. Yeah. They don't have the polar bears only they're tiny now.

What flavor? Raspberry lime. How is it? It's fine. It's fine. It's, it's not so far from drinking beer. Oh, I don't like those, Johns. I like them.

They're too, they're too artificially. At least the last time I had one. What was the other one? That's a Coke zero cherry float. Oh, all right. That sounds good. Cherry vanilla Coke zero. It's delicious, dude.

I do like, I do like a cherry coat. I don't know if you can read this, but it does say it contains no dairy. Oh. Yeah. So I won't shit my pants for that reason. Oh, yeah. Blow it out, Tom. Blow it out in the smell.

Man, when I, oh, I haven't got to that part with Quikwee Quig. We really had a discussion about that, didn't we? but you've blown your both. No. Fucking how is it actually gay or not? Mm-hmm. I mean.

Kind of. It kind of is. I mean, so, all right, to kind of summarize the, the points that were made and the points that I had research was that

basically, you were either really good friends or you were Sodomites in, like, 1850. And it would not have been read as Sodomite behavior. in 1850.

It would have been read as very, very, very good friends. And whether that met you were gay or not. No, I mean, whatever. I mean, obviously we don't care. We don't care. I won't take away anyone's queer reading of it. It does read really gay. It reads very, it's turbo, it's turbo gay.

And I mean that non-derogatory. Right. It breeds like male men falling in love with each other, like, Like, he says he's man and wife now. They, they're holding each other. Dude, they're spouting. It's cold. It is cold.

And then he writes, but that's the thing. It's these are all, everything in this book is like an ADHD aside. Like he spends an entire chapter just talk about how nice it is to be snug under the covers when it's cold out. It is. And it's true. It's really nice. And he like, writes like this pine to it. It's like, what the fuck?

I don't know. I like it so far. I like it so far. I read the abridged. The Ridge version as a child with just like the story beats, but now I'm getting all the weird shit. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, the sermon. Just like, oh, I'm just reading about Jonah the whale. Like, I haven't read that before. Ah, I hope that's not foreshadowing. Yeah. What was it? I know, what was that from?

I know writers that use subtext and they're all cowards. Yeah. Garth Rangy's Dark Place. Have you watched that? Oh, it's like six episodes. One of the episodes has like a floating gun going around the hospital, like killing people. That's pretty terrific.

Yes. Yeah, it's, it's great. There's got to be Garth Morangi fans here. Somewhere amongst us. Absolutely. There's no way there's that. Amongst us. So, unfortunately, we have to talk about sports for a little bit at least.

We can do that. Flyers. We're going to go with flowers first. Let's do that. Flyers in the playoffs. They won three, two, against the hated and feared Pittsburgh Penguins. Pittsburgh Penguins. They look decent.

I think they could win this series against the Steelers, the Penguins retirement home. The Flyers, so I, look, this is the first Flyers game I watched. Even checked out, yeah. Yeah, they were like pretty aggressive, like hitting hard. you know, out physicaling the penguins. More physicality.

Yeah. I don't know who any of the guys are. Yeah, I have to look it up. I know a goalie, Dan Vladar. At least it's not, we don't have the rapist goalie, so that's nice. No, the Golden Knightsville. Oh, okay, Jordan.

Is that whose jersey you have? I don't think he has a Carter Hart jersey, does he? No. I hope not. Oh, Bobby just DM me back. What time you're thinking? 5.30. Yeah.

And then, yes, he plays for the Golden Knights, and he sucks. All right, but we can go later. Yeah, we can do that. Oh. Wow. All right. Wow. I like a live, live DMing.

Yeah, so the Flyers look at the one. Dude, best of seven every fucking. round is insane. Yeah, the Bruins became the first, the 2011 Boston Bruins were the first team to, uh, uh, go to seven all,

uh, good Lord. All, how many rounds is that? Was that three? That's four, 28. That's like,

that's a third of a season. Third of a second season. Holy shit. There's a reason they call it the second season. Yeah. I mean, at least, uh,

play a hockey. I do what I do want a, uh, Porter Martone got the game winning goal. He is the youngest flyers score a goal in his playoff debut beating Simone Gagne. Gagne. Yeah, I do want to point out that there were 81 combined hits in game one. Philly averages 23 hits a game and Pittsburgh averages 17.6.

And so that is double. So they were both. They hate each other, yes. You know, this is the only. sport that we're now we're in the same division as Pittsburgh right? Yeah. It's really a shame.

It really is a shame. I think it's the because let's see here. Let's see here. The Steelers used to be and then they moved right, the balance out the NFC. I think so. The NFL, new to the AFC.

And then the pirates were but moved the NL Central, which makes sense geographically although now that we have the fucking Marlins. Yeah, make it make sense. Yeah. Hang on.

One second. I'm generally looking it up. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, they're both in the metro. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I like having the Pennsylvania rivalry.

Need to. It's because I get to talk shit on the part of the state I don't like. Anything, anything at the Allegheny plateau, right? West is the fucking Appalachians. West is the Great Valley. get the fuck out of here. I think isn't, isn't, uh, isn't the Lehigh Valley technically a continuation of the Great Valley? Isn't it the same as the Shenandoah?

Let me look up. Hold on. Let's select geography here. It indeed is. Yeah, so it's, so would Chambersburg. That's why it was so easy for them to the slip on up during the, during the late unpleasantness. Oh, I did, I did promise I was going to do the, the, I did promise, uh, I did promise, uh, lately that I shall endeavor to use the Southern gentlemen voice.

Do that. Most, most effusely, the next occasion we recorded. Everyone's so fun to do. Have you ever just done that? Probably not. I've listened to the last talk. With Rise slips into that. He can do it pretty well.

Yeah, he does. I have a sweet tea on the verand. I could use a sweet tea on the veranda. Who couldn't? Who among us would not like a sweet tea on the veranda? I know you just flashed. Your thing just flashed. What flashed?

What are you talking about? Like your recording thing, but then it came back. I think we're good? Yeah, we're good. I don't know. I mean, I have my local, but I've seen my way for him and it looks fine. We have update. Palestine, BJJ Rashgard just came.

in on the group chat that's that's terrific this amazing uh thanks patrick um oh i'm not seeing it yet that's okay yeah it's all right um where were we talking about oh you know cindic crosbie has 60 goals 79 points and uh 79 assists and 139 points of any player against the flyers including 36 points at 24 career playoff games that dude is older than me isn't he? Yeah, he is. I think he is.

My God, he's still playing. Yeah, he's a marvel. He's 38. Is he, was he the one that that did the dryer or is that Wayne Gretzky? No, that's him.

That's him. Gotcha, hold on. I did, I did, what does that thing say on here? Oh, it says FNB. not EMB on their on their jerseys what

all right because I made a joke about the the Pangewich jersey saying ENB on it because they were all supporting NB um does it say FNB first National Bank yeah

fuck I got that wrong so Findies I guess they support Fimbys I mean they support MVs still why not yeah someone's got it oh yeah we do yeah we do

but I more mean than hockey which is not exactly welcoming. No. Well, speaking of playing bitter rivals, let's talk about the sixers in the playoffs. Heated rivalry. We won it. We wanted Boston, apparently. Yeah. How about that? That's bold.

That's bold. We lost the first round, 123.91. Yeah. Yeah. Welcome to the budsaw. That is the Boston Celtics. Um, with our home Poor Rennie. Poor Rennie. Oh, she gets nothing and deserves nothing. How,

dude, these hockey players play more games than the NBA does. And like the, like, they played what, yesterday? Yeah. No,

two days ago. That they played yesterday, they played tomorrow. How many days in between do they get? Till. I guess it is hockey. Right? They get,

yeah. At day off in between. Never mind. I thought they weren't playing until the 24th because I can't read the Google calendar thing. Man, my bad. That's okay. I don't think we're getting out of the first round here.

You are not. Yeah, with the Celtics. It's not happening. If it does, that'd be great. But it's not. It's not going to happen, though. It's not going to happen. And I didn't watch.

I meant to watch it, but I fell asleep. So we took a nap. Yeah, I watched part of it. Yeah, so tonight, the loaded slate, we've got in basketball. We've got Toronto at Cleveland. So our Cleveland contingent will be pleased, I guess. Cleveland's up on that series. The Hawks at the Knicks.

And then we've got Minnesota at Denver. And then you also, again, have Sixers tonight, I think, right? No. No, tomorrow. Tomorrow. What about we have Flyers tonight in hockey? Yes. And then we have, I don't want to talk about it.

I don't want to talk about the other sports team. Which other sports? I'm fucking mad at them. Oh, the Phillies? The Phillies. No, tell me more. They fucking. They say, don't panic.

We're eighth away through the season already. They stink, dude. What is going on with the fucking Phillies? First off, bad omens when you have to make. John Kruk wear suit. Mm-hmm. That I'd never wanted Tom McCarthy more because they just play so well off each other. It's terrible.

Abysmal Sunday night baseball. I mean, at least it wasn't a blowout, but there were so many ways of opportunities runners to scoring position. Mm-hmm. I mean, we're in a skid. Phillies run a skid. We're 8 and 13 right now. When the Mets have lost 11 in a row, so it could be worse, like, yes.

Yes. Yes. But we got swept by the Braves. Yep. We stink. We stink. I, I, okay. We stink.

So let's, let's talk about this a little bit. Yeah, I guess we have to. So there's one thing for the hitting because we have streaky guys, which has been a fucking complaint because they always seem to fucking slump at the same time. They love doing it. but what is happening? We're going with the pitching. This is just order tipping his pitches again.

Sanchez's fucking sucking. Taiwan Walker can't pitch. I mean, Taiwan Walker, he's an instant loss. He's getting nuked every time. He's awful. And we like Taiwan as a person, but maybe it's time that, I mean, hey, you're getting paid. So pray that they just. They just fucking, they just fucking get rid of you.

Yeah. I mean, Schorbert is playing well. Bryce is playing what, like statistically is playing well. They're the only two guys are playing decent. I mean, Crawford's,

Crawford's playing well for your, for your nine-hole litter. Rheumuto's okay. He looks decent, yeah. And everyone else kind of, kind of just blows. Blows. Balsh. Marshon sucks.

Dillon Moore sucks. I don't camp sucks. Out-boom sucks dog shit. Bryce is fucking terrible. Trey Turner's below mid Brandon Marsh is eh I mean he's playing well for him Sosa's fine for him

Who loves Sosa Bitches love Sosa But Felix Reyes is playing well Obviously only one game Um Fucking Doran's hurt I mean

Looking at looking at I forgot Duran with her Yeah, Sanchez is still pitched well he just did that one bad start and Nola is actually pitching okay But Luzardo Luzardo is Is a newt

Luzardo is actually Like using like advanced stats Like ERA plus Yeah Fucking Luzardo is 53 Walker's 46 Oh no Yeah that's bad

Painter's okay I mean he's had some good moments And some of the other guys have looked good out of the bullpen Alvarado's look like garbage That back who's sucks. Yeah. And Jesus Luzardo is one in three with an ERA of 7-9-4.

Yeah. I mean, what's Taiwan's ERA is fucking 916. Ugh. Yeah. Just absolutely abysmal. Hideous. Jesus. I, I.

So, what does we do with that? What's the remedy? I don't, I don't know. All the WIP guys, fire. Topper fire Kevin Long. It's not going to help. Fire, fire, Kyle, Koffel. It's like, no, it's like, well.

If the pitches aren't pitching and the hitters aren't hitting, what more can you do? Right. And this might be, hey, look. If by May, this isn't resolved, they could get rid of the Topper. They could. They might. They usually wait, like, until a little bit deep. That's when they got rid of Gerardy, a little deeper in the season.

Yeah. And then you got Don Maddling, Madding. ready to go. Oh, yes. He's on the staff now. He's the bench coach. I don't know. I don't know.

And there's something, who was I reading? Someone was talking, there was a thread on blue sky. But how these guys are just fucking uptight, man. It might have been some of our friends over at batting around. The Phillies? Yeah, the Phillies are uptight. And like, did you see Cassiananos's,

pictures from Philly versus San Diego No Oh hold on See if they had the photos All right so hold on Here we go This is on Reddit Sorry

Okay Just take a look at the three The three headshots What he was in the Phillies Oh yeah Oh boy He's just so happy on San Diego Look at that

Look at that grin Yeah God that That sucks. People are asking why his ears growing? Because it's so happy. Yeah. Oh.

That sucks. I, I, dude, what? If this year just, he just, he just, if we don't like, if we don't like, yeah, like, if this, if this is like, it's, it's June and we're, you know, our winning percentage is like, you know, 3, 334 or so like that. Which is going to be. Do you just just give it of everything at the trade of that line? Just everyone. See you,

anyone. See, Hart. Yeah. Well, you'd have to agree to the no trade. Yeah. So does Turner.

Like, he's playing well this year. Just Turner. I have a no trade clause. I don't know. Do you? Can we be? Brice Harper,

like I said, he's playing well. statistically. He's playing well. Do we really want him like here for like the rest of the, no his career. Not really. I don't know, man.

I feel like, I'm really tired of him. I want like, if there's like a way when you're scouting, you can like, like an OOTP. To the future. Like OOTP,

you can sort players by like personality types and like how, like work ethic and like how like are they prankster? Are they funny? Are they outgoing? Can you just do that? Can we just get like a bunch of like loose guys or just like, weirdos? man, I'm just trying to have fun.

Like more brand than Marshes. Like I feel like with too many tight asses. Yeah. Bryce Harper is a tight ass. 273 right now. Yeah, he's playing right. Schwerber's playing well. But they can't hit.

They can't hit with runners a scoring position. And it's like, like, am I, is this wrong? Or is this true statistically that Philly stuff? Let's look it up. Teams. Teams. All right. How do I filter?

I want to filter this by like all. teams, runners and scoring position like last year or this year. Team stats. All right, here we go. 2026 MLB. Batting average. I want to do batting average running runners and scoring position. Let's see.

Batting, advanced batting. I really want to see this. I want to see if we're fucking insane or not. No, we're not insane. Sabrometric batting. Standard batting. there's got to be bat batting runners in scoring position there is but i think it's behind the the stat head uh oh it fuck it better not be player value are bad are the

you're pissed cyber metric batting the bib are we getting bibbed let's oh do you want his runners and scoring we're getting bipped right now what did you find it do you want uh i think so hang on this might be it with runners and scoring position you want that yeah Oh, yeah There you go, yeah Server error with page requests Hold on It's giving me an error

Okay, well Word for me So I don't know what's tough So we're getting Bipt right now, I think So go Just search Bryce Harper Uh

baseball reference Harper RISP And the first result is Year by year splits per risk Okay Okay, I'll find out what league average is Yeah old Bryce is hitting 250

so runners in scoring position by year so 250 this year last year he was abysmal 233 though he was clutch clutch before that I need that I'm searching right now

so I'm looking at right now I'm looking at team tier metric bettering so I'm looking at Bubbip is batting average on balls in play and the league average is this year year so far, 288. The Phillies are below. So it could just be that we're achieving a statistic anomaly right now. So that actually.

With team average with runners in scoring positions. We are not the worst. We're sixth. That's insane. Yeah. Can you can you share that one? Yeah. From stat muse.

I think this is it. I don't know. The ranking is really weird. Let's see. Team average of runners in scoring position. Oh, no, we're like 20th. We scored 23 most runs. Yeah, we stink, dude.

The Braves are phenomenal. We're in the bottom third. We're in the bottom third right now this year. So I'll say is that if we're... You want like 280 and we're doing two, do we are doing actually 258, which is kind of crazy, which is like right around average. 11th in the league. We should not be this bad is the answer.

Right, we shouldn't be. Like I said, I am seeing that we are, one, two, three, four, the fifth from the bottom in terms of bubib or badbib batting average on balls and play. That does say statistically there is a bit of an anomaly here. It could just be we suck, but it could also be that like there is a reason why, because you kind of trend towards the mean as the year goes on. So that might, that might be part of it. Cumulative bat player.

Standard batting. I just, there's got to be a batting average. This shouldn't be so hard to find. Because I want to compare years. This is bananas. We shouldn't be this bad. No, we shouldn't be this bad. Well, I'll have to look up this later.

but like, no, it sucks, man. It's not fun to watch. It's miserable. And the players are getting fucking booed because it's like, dude, every time you get guys in a scoring position, you fucking fail. You suck. Right. Exactly.

You deserve to be booed. And then like the blowouts, the absolute blowouts, it's, it's, it's got to, it's 100% demoralizing. It sucks ass to be on the player side of it. But you're also getting paid a little shit. a shitload of money. Right. You should be better.

And the fans are paying a lot of money to, like, this is where I'm like, listen, I'm on the side of the workers. Right. But people are spending a shitload of money over it to go to your overpriced ballpark, which is wildly overpriced as we know. Wildly overpriced. So maybe if they, if they suck, we can get cheaper tickets again. Maybe. Maybe. I don't know.

Sometimes you just want to go see a ballgame and not spend. $200. I would like that. Alas. You can't even spend $200. Because tickets get you already almost to $100 anyway, if it's just two of you. Yeah, exactly. I mean, if you bring food, you're fine.

But like, I should be able to get a fucking snack at a bar park. I want a hot dog and a beer for like $20. I want a hot dog, two beers and an ice cream in a helmet. Yes. Why can't I get that? You can for $60. Yeah. It's too expensive.

It is too expensive. Well, thank God, Don Mattingly is going to be our coach. Well, that's what all the, like, the clickbait, like, Sports Illustrated shit is now. Yeah. Like, this Yankees legend might be the next head coach of the Philadelphia, Philadelphia. It's like, shut up. Joe Girardi? Oh, God.

Yeah. With Zach's bootleg Joe Girardi, Jersey. I'd never, I have not seen that one. I'll have them send, send me a picture. Yeah. All right. I'm getting tired. You want to do DMs?

Yeah. Those are messages. All right. Some of them might be a little old. I think this one's a little old from metric mic. Blue jackets continue a full-on graveyard spin. Yep. It's going to be one of those aviation disaster YouTube channels in six months.

From the second place in Metro a mere week ago, this is March 25th. So this is, I think our oldest DM, to knock out a wild card today, April 3rd. Carolina game night, they had 10 shots on goal. 10 record for a modern NHGite gelt. That's terrible. Jesus. is NHL game is nine was the Preston-Wass

honestly this team doesn't deserve the playoff spot did they make it in the playoffs no no sad way to enter a team's 25th anniversary I asked Charlie to make a no blue jackets emo because I mean how to even respond to this and Charlie was nice enough to provide should have been a Browns fan

because it's only 16 games 17 now yeah 17 now we're gonna read Kyle's yeah hang on let me fire it up where to go there it is uh hey leo this is kind of from cleveland pronounce he him

i'm sitting this out on saturday i'm watching two two pennsylvania teams slug it out i make beers deep my favorite local brewery j a fb and wister j fb stands for just a fucking brewery and i love it to pieces if i can quote ice cube today has been a good day the guards just beat the oils of casbeat

whomever i don't know i was sleeping what happened and my beloved Minnesota Wild stomped the Dallas Stars into the dirt where they belong. It's all I have no scores for flyers and pens yet so I'm strapping in for a good game. Fuck Donald Trump,

have a good one, boys. Thank you, Kyle. Just the fucking brewery. Where is that? In Worcester, Ohio, dude. Oh, Worcester, Ohio. Yeah. Oh, it's got a good reviews on Yelp.

Oh, they did not have a kitchen. Ooh, red ale. All right, let me close that. All right. I forgot to put voicemails in. Hold on. Let me upload them. Oh, my God.

I'm so fucking tired. You sound tired. The Colombian coffee porter. Oh. All right. All right. First one, we have Mark from New Jersey. Hey, Liam.

Hey, Tom. Mark from Jersey, pronoun. Behan following up on the 9-by-9 challenge a couple days late. I can report that it is a terrible idea. Got through about seven innings strong with the fearsome dogs. I don't know. I don't know. It's also a fantastic way to be a way to be a serious idea.

So, yeah, don't do it. It's dumb. Enjoy the game with an appropriate amount of hotballers in gear. Fuck. You are a bucking that. I'm sorry my first game of that series

and yeah it gets worse it does it does get worse how much is the 999 how much is like the fake one at the ballpark it's like 55 bucks do you get real nine real hot dogs

no they're like bite size dogs they're basically that's such bullshit yeah what the fuck you ever done the actual 999 challenge No, I have not because I'm 38 Okay, well we could try it We could

That'd be a good live show Like a live stream We just we just Are hanging out Would have to be like the most trusted Tier Yeah Patrons

Nine flight-sized beers Fuck off No it doesn't How many actually ounces of beer is that It's one big can Oh that's fucking stupid At least give me like two beers.

Two beers, exactly, for 55 fucking dollars. Yeah. Stupid. All right. Anyway, so we have the, we have, thanks for, thanks for calling in Mark. And Mark calls in again later on, but we have a, the anti-Nova has called in. We haven't heard in a while. Okay.

Hi, Tom. Jay, Liam. Nova here, pronouns she and her. and I'd like to follow up with the continued fuck the IOC. Yes. News from really fringe sports with the WFDF, the World Flying Disc Federation, put out an announcement a few days ago that they read the IOC's policy change and decided, well, you know, we're not an Olympic sport anyway. So I'm going to paraphrase, fuck you, we're going to do our own thing, trans women are women. They can continue to compete.

Go fuck yourself. No, I'm paraphrasing, and I'm not speaking for the WIFDiff here. Now, WIFDiff is the world governing body for disc sports, flying disc sports, like Ultimate and Disc Golf. And do not disrespect disc golf and ultimate, because, Liam, you're not the only one who knows their way around in 870. Anyway, I just want to say that that's a little bright spot because I don't know about anybody else, but it's like the orange chode will put out in a... executive order or something, you know, which is like horrible and terrible. And then all these organizations that have been like doing okay by trans people who just instantly reversed themselves.

Yeah. And it's like, EOs aren't even laws. What are you doing? It's like you don't have to kiss the chode, you know, you can resist. It's okay. Nothing bad's going to happen. And they do it anyway, which is really gross and it shows like that they've got no spine, no integrity.

They're just blowing back and forth with the wind. And it's disgusting. But WFDF is like, nah, we're good. Trans women are good. So, yeah,

trans women are women. And, oh, yeah, fuck Penn State. And fuck the state of fucking Kansas. Yeah, peace out.

Thanks, Anci, Nova. Thank you. Actually, I think disc golf kind of fucks. Yeah. Well,

good for them for standing up. Like, there's, there's, that rules. There's no reason. It just, I, it, I don't know what to say. It's just, who gives a shit?

Like, just fucking let people compete. Right. Exactly. It does not matter. They're trying to be, uh, oh, they think that they're reading the, the wins the wrong way. They think that the winds are going against this and it's, and it's not. It's, it's, it's a couple of loud fucking assholes who have way too much, uh, interest in what goes on in other people's bedrooms.

and yeah yeah so fuck all that um we we're on your side and you know obviously good on the disc off people and fuck hans us too betraying your legacy no exactly rock chalk dickhead yeah all right well thanks again nova uh we got uh we got we got wayne hey dm it's wayne brownout dm uh call to recap the last bit of the World Cup qualifiers, most of which resulted in probably some sort of level of heartbreak for a huge chunk of this, God-persaking country. Thursday, the Republic of Ireland, unfortunately, lost on penalties to Chequia, a team that would also beat Denmark on penalties to advance to the World Cup.

other notable wins include Sweden, beating Poland 3-2, and then absolute thriller, the last qualifier, and then Italy just completely and otherly just shitting the bed against Bosnia. I do that. 4-1 on penalties, which that 4-1 on penalties is like that's a hell of an achievement for the Italian soccer, just digging into the low, the treacher, just the deepest trenches of the men. Terranian Sea there. Good, great stuff by the Italian Football Federation. Also, in the World Cup Bullfires, Jamaica unfortunately lose to Democratic Republic of Congo,

which means the unions Andre Blake will never play in a World Cup throughout his career, probably ever. And in a sport spot of good news, Iraq beat Bolivia in a major upset. Okay. Hold on. I like that. Yeah. Since Saddam Hussein ran the country.

Oh, shit. Over 40 years ago. So it's a good achievement for them. Apparently, there were plenty of partying scenes between Mexico fans and the Iraqi diaspora. That's apparently was in Mexico as well. So the field is finally set for this World Cup. Will anybody show up to it? Who the fuck knows?

Especially with everything going on right now. As for the mats, the mats have started out fairly pretty good, I'd say. Oh, how they'll go for you, Wade? I'm not getting my hopes up just yet. Good news. There's some cracks in it. As opening day kind of showed, the pitching is not totally reliable. But it sees the offense.

Hopefully we'll keep it shit together. No, they will not. Who knows? We know. the future. We're in the future. As always, let's go,

Matt, to go records, good enough. Yeah, turns out, yeah, didn't, didn't go so for the Mets.

Wayne does calling, again later, he's going to be our last voice mail, but, that's funny. Thanks again, Wayne. We have redacted.

Next. Listener, redact it. Who knows who they are? It's a mystery. They could be a spy. We don't even know. We have no idea.

Like the voice, no, Tom. Hey, Tom Yee, Liam. It's your boy redacted again with another swimming adjacent story. The swimming world has been very aware of ridiculous new projects called the enhanced games that's been developed in the last few years. The steroid games. Yes. Social media a little bit. Their main tenet is getting washed up Olympians to scope and use illegal equipment to, in their words, push the boundaries of human performance.

The athletes and coaches are really good at selling this human advancement thing on their social media. And they either really believe it, which is sad or maybe sadder. They're just. Cocaine and heroin will not be allowed. I don't know. But it's gross. Cocaine would help with some ways. Swimming people quickly figured out that unsurprisingly, the whole thing is just a stunt for.

for this company to sell supplements and then also sell their cell tech growth hormone protocols to chugs going through a midlife crisis oh hell yes really surprise there um if you're wondering who is behind funding this whole scheme don't give you a second to think about it joe rogan mike is rachel that's right it's peter seal oh it's peter thiel yeah that's that's a name It's Satan themselves. Right. Him finding a way to soft launch eugenics research or some bullshit.

But the sharing on top of the whole thing is they've been working already for like three years. They finally got someone to break a world record, which is like the whole marketing thing behind doing all of this. And then a regular person broke that record like three months later without or using anything illegal. Oh, wow. So long story short, these losers have already been cut publicly before they even put on their first big event. But I'm sure you're going to see more of in the news. Anyway, fuck that's safe. Thank you, redacted.

That's interesting, though. Like, you redacted. How much of an advantage that stuff can confer. And I think where it does, it's like giving you a slim, like, when you're already at the peak, it's probably like a slim advantage. Right. But it's, that's like Barry Bonds, I go through Barry Bonds, he still had to hit the ball.

Right. He still had to see the ball. Like, obviously, yeah, fucking tanking those shots, but he still had to be a, a top hitter, right. 1% player in baseball history to do what he did. Because you had other guys who go on steroids and they're fucking, they're fucking Max Kepler. right? Like, what did Matt say in our group chat? It was like, it's like, dude, you fucking took steroids to hit 180.

Yeah. Like, like, you know? Unbelievable. Yeah. So, so, and especially considering the fact that these are former athletes. Right. Like, they're not in their prime anymore. So it doesn't even count.

No, they're not. You need 25 year olds who are fucking juice to the gills for this to actually be statistically right. Exactly. Yeah. So you have to be like, hey, by. So it has to be financially worth it. And then I wouldn't be a surprise with Peter Thiel,

especially with that shit that fucking Palantir put out the other day. Oh, God. That was a fucking nightmare show. That is just a AI filter Corpo speak version of like fucking Nazi shit. Yeah, it was Nazi shit. Yes. Yeah. Those guys, you fucking need to go the same way as Nazis too.

Follow your leader. All right. Mark from New Jersey called in again. So let's hear what he's got to say. Hey, how's it going? It's Marks, Jersey. How's it going? It's about 10 minutes to plug drop of the Flyers versus Montreal game here on the 13th of April.

Oh, wow. We haven't reported for a minute. I know. Ethical tanking discussion the other day. Ethical tagging, baby. While it is easy to criticize the Flyers for being irrelevant for the past 10 years, they're a team that has, well, there was a maybe something. you know, some tanking past two or three years.

They've been going for it this year, and they're now two points away from a playoff spot. A win tonight or any company is two points in the next two games. And they're the 80th. Yeah. So it's easy to think that they've been a relative and not a good team, but if somebody's been watching them all year. They've been exciting at times. The power play is something atrocious, but they got Ziegress back,

They got a... Fuck me. They got a forester back, and it's decent again. So, hopefully, by the time you guys are playing this, they're in the playoffs. But if they haven't made it, I can let you know. Some of these watch them all year. It's nice to watch the team that's... They're getting in the middle of a tornado.

I just want to have exciting hockey. What are you doing over there, man? Fucking. Those are fuck the pens, I think. Like, they use recording. Oh, here I'm at Castle Bravo nuclear test. Oh, shit. I think the shock wave is coming.

Um. Damn. Tim Cook stepping down. Oh, yeah? Tim Apple. Yeah, Tim Apple. So let me, I just want to make sure my, my, my, my thesis here. The, the flyers, did the flyers ethically tank?

Is that with the, with the ideas? I think what the argument was, yes. And then they just went all in for it. Yeah, which is what you kind of have to do. Yeah, but I have no interest in the flyers because they fucking sucked ass for like the last decade. Well, exactly. So, sure.

go all and in, but do you think you could have got there are teams every sport that can just perform and being like the top, you know, even in a bad year, they're still the top half of the league. They're still threatening, yeah. Yeah.

So I would get to disagree about that. But unless I misheard your thesis there as, as, you know, the jet stream itself descended upon. Which is wild, by the way. Yeah, that's crazy how that happens. It's not supposed to come down to the surface. Yeah, I'm just recording here from the...

Castle Bravo, right. I'm here. Yeah, that's a 747 turning on. It's going on. All right, guys. Yeah, I'm just here in P.HL doing my job, recording my sports shit as a, you know, disconnected to GPU. Did you see that blue sky that it's like the A-K-K-1?

cars like drama. It's like different like it's all the messages the pilots are sending. Yeah, yeah. Through A cars. And then one of them was just like, can you tell them to not open the cargo door I'm turning the engine on? It's like

it's like great. Yeah, good job. The cargo doors already closed, you idiots. That's where the engine is starting to spin. Yeah. All right. We got one last voice mail then we're then we're out of here all right let's Wayne it's Wayne once again let's see how smuggy is about the Mets hey Tom yeah Liam it's Wayne grown out to him about the recap probably one of the most thrilling wire games I

probably have seen probably ever in my life it started in the first period first period was incredibly bad for the flyers Hurricane scored, two goals, one on an even straight, and one on a pot of play on a really bad penalty that was taken by the Flyers. Second period came around and they turned it around, getting two goals, two goals in the second period, tie it up at two, nothing given in the third. No goals given in the third.

Although the referees were absolutely horrendous tonight, they missed an elbow call that they called as a high stick, took it away. They said there was no high stick, despite the fact, Tripit took an elbow to the face and it drew blood. Oh, wow.

That was probably one of the, angry, that was probably one of the angriest moments I've seen at the, at the Wells Fargo Center in ages, quite frankly. The game ended up going into overtime, which, by that measure,

eliminated the Columbus Blue Jackets. Uh, Posting contention Nothing given in the shootout. A couple closed opportunities to breakways to Carolina, but they could not convert. And the game went into a shootout.

And Edeldowns, the goalie for the flyers, stop all four penalty shots he faced. It was Forster who scored the winning goal in the shootout. And Vandex

would be saved and the Philadelphia Flyers are going to the postseason for the first time since the COVID, since the COVID season of 2019, 2020. Good. That was probably one of the most electric atmospheres. I think the, um, Exfinity Mobile Center or whatever the fuck you want to call it. Um,

has probably seen probably since the 2010 Stanley Cup run. Oh yeah. It's stuff that cup run started similarly with a, shootout with over the New York Rangers, I might ask. So who knows? Maybe one, get one over Sidney Crosby before he leaves

hockey forever. Anyway, boys, go Flyers. Go Flyers. Go Flyers. Go Flyers. Oh, thanks, Wayne. Yeah, no. It's, uh,

they're playing tonight, like we said. Yeah. and be nice for them to make a run. I don't think they're going to fucking win, but you know. No, but we can hope. Make a nice little run at it. Yeah. And then their tickets will get more expensive.

Yeah. Do it go flies. Everything is so expensive. Everything sucks. Everything fucking sucks. All right. Shoutouts to our North Catholic tier patron. Patrick Sean Cat, Mike Charlie.

Kyle Wayne, Sam, Claire, Chugglebird, and new. North Catholic tier patron, RJ. And the new 700 level patron, Ali's cat, or no, Ali C-Cat, L-C-Cat. Ali-Cat. Voicemail, 267, 371, 7218. Give us your name and pronouns.

Tell us what you would do, Peter Thiel's penis. DM us and follow us. I'm at Tom Paine on Blue Sky. He's at W-TyP.com and Blue Sky because he bested up somehow. And then 10K lost his pot on Blue Sky as well. Follow us there. We've always been Flyers podcast.

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is championship robust betting around and be gay, solve crime. I feel like Nova has eight other podcasts so we don't, we forget to mention.

Yeah, it's true. All right, everyone, be good. And, go Flyers. Go Flyers. All right. No one likes us.

No one likes us. No one likes us. No one lies us. We don't care. No one likes us. We don't care.