Ten Thousand Losses - Poop Chat

Episode Date: December 3, 2022

On a very chatty 10kL, the boys talk about Tom's liquid fueled squats, the Artemis I mission, gerrymandering, the Birds first loss, the Sixers being doodoo, among other topics. Please call in, DM us, and give us a good rating wherever you get your podcasts! Follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/tenklossespod  Leave us a voicemail: 267-371-7218 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/tenthousandlosses 

accused of punching a police force CTE! CTE! CTE! those negative fans make himself vomit GO BAYS! GO BAYS! you gotta think the fanatic's gonna go down to her and give her a bunch of hot dogs or the snowball starting to come they'll boo us but they won't let anybody else boo us i guess what i don't understand basically it's like your gut health is is sort of a never-ending source of wonder to me it feels like you end up pooping in weird places like kind of a lot

yeah that does that does seem to happen uh like it's more often than not you are you are pooping in a place you probably shouldn't be. Yeah. You know, it's funny. It's like, you haven't known me for that long, but it is very true of me.

I've known you to poop in some, just like the poop chair. Number one, we had the poop chair. Yeah. The poop chair. Uh, the story you were telling me off air about you very nearly shit in your

pants at the gym. I mean, I, I would say I did technically qualify nearly shitting your pants at the gym i mean i i would say i did technically qualify for shitting my pants i i i wonder if your wife is in some sort of low-grade poisoning you experiment oh yeah yeah well yeah maybe that's the thing i she does uh she does like true crime oh oh i i liked your wife until this exact moment i don't oh man I fucking, there was that tweet going around the other day that was pretty good about it. Like about how like, Hey, I'm in a ditch.

And then like, people are like, Oh, welcome to our cozy, spooky mystery hour. You know, uh, what's up crime heads? Um, yeah, no, I listen. I, uh, I have listened to true crime podcasts. Uh, putting, um, there's one that the only one I've really listened to is, no, I, listen, I, uh, I have listened to true crime podcasts. Yes. Putting, um, there's one that the only one I've really listened to is, uh, Rhyme Junkie, which is like. Okay. I, well, it was, we were on a road trip through New England and it was just like,

Bryn had gotten sick of nonstop, uh, atmospheric black metal. And so I was forced under duress to listen to a true crime podcast. God damn it, man. Driving through the fucking woods in New England, listening to some fucking... I don't know. I'm very tired, so I can't think of a band name

off the top of my head, but like Stormkeep or something like that. Imagining evil demons coming out of the woods and you're fighting them with the magic of the guitar or something. That and uh imagining you know evil demons coming out of the woods and you're fighting them with like the magic of the guitar or something that's much cooler oh i just cracked i think the entirety of my neck yeah exactly like i don't yeah yeah so you were forced to listen to it not it's not that bad it's just formulaic but so are we that's true i mean everything's formulaic, but so are we.

That's true. Everything's formulaic. I guess the thing is that it's good for reminding you of the hopelessness of law enforcement. Yeah. I feel like you or someone was saying this on another podcast. Maybe it was the HHM's episode you guys did. I think you guys were saying that. Someone I know was saying it.

Or maybe we were talking about that person. I can't remember. Yeah. Alice, it's Alice, I believe, was saying it, just like how useless the cops are. That's the running theme is cops are useless. Yeah, cops are useless, but bringing an extra pair of underwear to

the gym is never useless. Why is that, Tom? Because when you have chicken vindaloo that you don't agree with and then you go to do a squat um now what i should have done is i should have waited for my one rep backs like kind of thing like i should have like tried to rep out and use the my final rep use the the as like exhaust fumes like to shoot me up a little faster but what's happening

i was warming up so i only had like i don't know like 60 pounds in the like overall just like kind of stretching my you know just warm up and and i feel like i have to poop and so i go i go to run the poop i put the barbell back first and as i'm running back i'm like running for i'm run farting which is always this like... I'm so glad people have headphones on. Yeah. Just the run fart where every step is like... Slap it out of you again. Yeah.

And I make it to the bathroom, but the farts themselves, they were not farts. They were a little warmer. Oh. But what's interesting at my gym it was more of more of a fluid and um and i had to go to the bathroom so i you know i drained the tanks but there's like teens in there in the gym right do in the men's locker room doing their poses and shit, and I've got to figure out how am I going to take off my pants and throw it in the trash can

and not have eight teenagers, like 14-year-olds, be like, oh, yeah, it's the shit pants, man. Yo, what's up, man? Yo, pooping pants. For real, for real, oh, God, just do your shit yourself.

That happened to me sort of at a at a movie theater in avalon or stone harbor and i came very very very very very close to late to leaving a 15 year old there to die i had to be brain dead it was not great was it was it was it they they caught you shit your pants is that what what happened? I was just pooping. Oh, you just poop. And they were just laughing at you. Yeah. And they like continue to laugh about it throughout the entire movie.

And well after the movie. And it was like, I, I don't have the patience or tolerance for this. And I was just like, the, the, the child said to me that I wasn't, uh, it wasn't legal for me to beat the shit out of him. And I was like, I got two lawyers and parents. I'm ready to take that bet. Yeah. It's a, it's only illegal if I get caught.

It's just like, listen, man, leave you here to die on 96 straight. Yeah. Oh man. That's just like, Oh shit.

Stories. Love shit. Stories. Love, love, love poop stories. Love shit stories. Love, love, love poop stories. Love poop stories. Poop.

Poop's funny, man. Yeah, it is. It is. Um, was that Joe Dirt? Why is poop funny?

Uh, why are boobies nice? Why is poops funny? You know, this is things we don't understand in life. Mysteries. Uh, who was on the grass,

you know, you know so on and so forth yeah yeah yeah um i mean if you think about it jfk did shit his pants when he got shot that was the least fun part of the autopsy i was trying to figure out where the rest of the skull was i guess oh man shit uh they fucking got our boy they fucking they fucking got him um our our moon boy segue segue here to space for for a minute yeah so we're excited to talk about this yeah yeah uh i i genuinely am excited uh but you know that we we changed together in speech uh what i like is right before he says that he's talking about things that are hard.

He's like, you know, why did Limbeck, Graciela, Radice Rice play Texas? We choose to go. And he just doesn't give it a chance for laughter. He just goes right into it. I was like, that is oratory. We don't teach that anymore. You know, just a like college football shit talk right before a massively inspirational

speech. They always cut that part out unless you watch the full video. He's at Rice. What are you fuckers doing? Playing Texas? I am very cool and normal for staying up until four in the morning because I couldn't fall asleep until everything was good.

I watched the Artemis One launch. Now, I'm assuming that you have at least seen the clip of it. Yes. Yeah. I am a massive, just like, like insane space nerd to like, I don't think I've really exposed you to that part of me yet. No, I just get lambasted or broadsided with linguistic shit.

I'm just like opening a text at like 2.15 PM. That's just like, it's written. It's written in IPA. And I'm just like, I hate this. Yeah. It's just writing, writing a message, I hate this. It's just writing the podcast notes

in a different language. That actually would be fun. It used to be that my dad, when people still went to ATMs, my dad would sometimes do the ATM in Spanish because he liked to challenge. Oh, nice.

My dad speaks zero Spanish. He's a lawyer. He's got enough Latin to figure it out. Yeah. The ATMs in the Vatican, you can pick Latin. I like that.

Accidentally withdraw way too much money because it's in Roman numerals or some shit. So, yeah. withdraw way too much money because it's in roman numerals or some shit um so yeah um we we're going back to space uh elon musk can blow me he did not his starship dick rocket did not make it to space first the sls did pork contracts are good jobs Jobs program, make work programs are good. That shit was flawless. That, that launch. And, uh, I, you know, like if you've seen videos of launch, people are like, yeah, go,

go, yo, or get out of here. Like, kind of like that. Um, now I, uh, two in the morning, my throat's still bothering me. I was screaming well you motherfucker you motherfucker don't you blow up on me you son of a bitch get out there like yeah and my wife is like is that good or bad like it's very good i can't say it till it's in the. I can't say it. Check in 20 minutes. So that motherfucking rocket did its rocket shit.

It got up there. Fucking suck it again. Elon Musk, fucking just blow me. You know, you have betrayed the bald community by getting hair plugs. And, you know, you've turned your back on where you came from. Yeah, so fuck that shit. Yeah. Dude, like, we might be in two years' time, if things hold up, like, seeing people around the moon.

And in, I don't know. The thing about this is the lander, because I don't know if that SpaceX shit is going to be ready to land on the moon. I don't know about that. So, yeah, we'll see how that works. But that's pretty fucking cool. Get the fuck back to space. Space is good. If you, as a listener, ever message me and say, well, maybe we should take care of the problems on Earth.

Yeah, I will block you. Yeah. And I will also dox problems on Earth. I will block you. I will also dox you too. I have sources. I actually do. I'll get you figured out. I'll have you banned in eight countries. I don't know which ones,

but I'll figure it out. Fuck you. Come on. It's like 1% of the budget? Not even that? NASA budget percentage. Let's see. We, come on. It's like, what? 1% of the budget? Not even that? NASA budget percentage. Let's see. We need to click. Let's see. Percentage. It's just the

0.48 fucking percent. you fucking kidding me yeah yeah we can afford it don't worry about it you can you can take a couple billion off the black budget uh or the the the sending guns to ukraine budget uh for that so um yeah space flight's cool. I took the opportunity to actually show my kids. I'm an English teacher, but I was able to work it into like, hey, what's something that inspires you? Hope it's space flight because that's what you're getting.

Yeah. Not a single student complained. They all thought it was cool as shit. Only one or two knew what was going on. The rest of them were like, what the fuck are you talking about? They're like,

this is really cool. Can I get a job doing that? I was like, yeah, you can, man. Let's get you a good union job. All right. You heard here first we support working for boeing what are you gonna do uh not in the not in the in the fucking welding the whole of the spaceship section yeah yeah only only the spaceships Or being the big dick warriors who went in to the danger radius zone.

So there was a leak on one of the pumps and they had to go in with a torque. They had to send three guys in with a torque wrench to torque down like four nuts. Don't want that job. Yeah, yeah. It was three guys. It was like two older guys and a younger dude.

You know that the two older guys are like, yeah, you're good. I got fucked. I can retire in three guys. And it was like two older guys and a younger dude. You know that the two older guys are like, all right, yeah, yeah, you're good. I got fucked. I can retire in three years. Get the fuck. Go do that. Yeah, we're good. We got. Good job, bud.

Yeah, you torque that shit. Don't make any sparks. We're all going to die. So, yeah, shouts out to the balls of steel nose guys. But yeah, space is cool. So, Did you know That this is a sports podcast Is it

I think so So hello Welcome to 10,000 Losses The only Philadelphia sports podcast that exists Suck my dick Write to Ricky Sanchez Write to Ricky Sanchez Hell in a cell 1v1 We could absolutely destroy them Suck my dick, writes Ricky Sanchez. Writes Ricky Sanchez.

Hell in a Cell, 1v1. We'll do tag team. We could absolutely destroy them. That's not really a challenge, actually. You could bring the skateboard in, too, and I'll go weaponless. Yeah, same. I'm a big boy. He's a big boy. Yeah. Yeah.

Don't worry. I'm getting a little like, just like a semi, just thinking about that fight. Like how, just how bad it would go. Probably some sort of psychological help for that, but that's what I heard.

You know, the fight, the fight, the, the fuck pipeline like that, that neurological. Yeah. That's normal,

right? Everyone's got that. You guys are, yeah. There's a, there's a tweet that goes around every now and again which is like I used to know a guy in college who would sit in his pre-match routine

was to watch hardcore pornography Jesus Christ not beat his meat not do anything just watch it for 30 minutes fully clothed uh because the release of testosterone uh would usually be enough to overwhelm his opponent is that how that works yeah i'm not sure if that's how that works but okay i think that's how that works i think that's how it works is it yeah i'm not a neurologist i a guy. You're going to do a one-person study

where if I'm already before I go to the gym, that works better or not. Yeah. Even John from Pittsburgh can work that out. I'm going to text my wife. He can text his wife. All right. All right. Yeah. So, yeah, I'm Tom Payne.

My pronouns are he, him. With me is my co-host, Ye. Liam Anderson. Yeah, this is a slow one today. I'm exhausted. Liam's exhausted. He had to kill a couple people today. Now you don't have any limbs.

Not so smart now, now that you... All you can do is roll. If I get fired, I get fired. I'm probably going to get that. Or just bleep it and let people figure out what it is. So, announcements. If you haven't listened to ready there's bonus with uh ross on weird baseball parks so go listen to that that hour um it'll be out when the time this

comes out attaboy it'll be it'll it'll be out for a couple days okay uh that that that bonus is going out the night tonight we're doing this so okay. There'll be a promo. That's patreon.com slash 10,000losses. Also, voicemail. We need to restock the call-in line. 267-371-7218. Give us your name and pronouns. All right.

Nice. Thank you. Let's talk about sports. Did you want to talk about the bullponder? Did you want to skip that oh let me get the notes uh yeah i mean we can talk about that uh so i saw a couple things to uh to actually oh you have that in here um uh yeah so greg abbott uh governor of texas is sending busload of migrants to phil, which is either 30 or 38 people. I've seen both.

Yeah. And obviously we're a city of about one and a half million. Yes. It's no big deal. I will say, welcome to Philly. I think it probably goes without saying saying but immigrant labor and immigrants in general are what built this city um the other days that's what brought my ancestors here right and we are proud and happy to have immigration in philadelphia uh real uh sorry

about it uh uh but yeah no it's uh it's repulsive man i mean it's obviously not that we had that we're taking care of migrants but that right governors and border politicians believe that these are not human beings worthy of dignity or fair treatment they're likely asylum seekers which uh not that any human being is illegal but these guys especially aren't um it's absolutely fucking repulsive that they're doing that they're upending people's lives for political stunts when all they fucking want to do is get a job and feed their families.

It's the most inhumane fucking thing. Fuck Greg Abbott. Once again, in the spirit of 10,000 losses, nuke Houston. Nuke Houston doesn't deserve to exist. We will take NASA and you guys can have Chernobyl too. Yeah.

We'll do that. You can apply on your list. The Texas school people will, you know, Austin will be fine. We'll make sure that the, it'll be an air burst. I do want to say too, I don't really support any

politician, but critical support for Larry Krasner because the cops all hate him. Yeah, that's a good way to get me to like you just because all the cops hate you. If the FOB comes out and says this guy is dangerous, I'm like, and check mark, yes. Yeah, so that, you know, I don't want to get

into a policy thing because the guys have been impeached, which if you know your civics, that don't want to get into like a policy thing because the guys have been impeached which if you know your civics that doesn't mean he's been removed he's been impeached um by the pennsylvania yeah by by the by the the 40 percent of republicans that somehow have gerrymandered their way to a majority in this in the state house um because the state is like 55% registered Democrat. And yeah, or it's, I'm sorry. The majority of registered voters are the largest block. The plurality is Democrat. Yeah, fuck that shit.

Like whatever your thoughts on like the policies, whatever, like the cops are in a soft strike because they're little babies. Their panties are in a bunch over this. They're little baby pants. Soft strike, calling out sick, the blue flu, whatever it is. Just go fuck yourselves, guys. Just shut the fuck up.

You don't have to work this job. This city has a long history of pulling out from when unexpected migrants have shown up. Going back to if any of you are unfamiliar with the USS Ganges, go look up the Ganges

people. They were a slave ship that was captured after the coast-wide slave trade was banned. The captain of the USS Janes, USS Ganges was a guy from Philly. He caught them out off of Cuba. Instead of taking them to the nearest port,

he took them to Philly because he knew that the Quakers there would get them fed, get them taken care of. And the city pulled out and they gave, now they did this, you know, this is the time, this is 18, like, oh, two or 1803 or something like that. They gave them indentures, but the indentures were very short. And they had a, instead of like your standard,

like indentured servant contract, it was like, Hey, you're going to be in. It was like their way of like, you're going to be indentured. But we're actually, what it is is I'm going to give you a trade and i'm i actually like the contracts are like way more right well written than your standard indenture and it was and it was and it was meant to take care of people so um and there are still folks around today whose last name is because of that so uh philadelphia been doing this shit for a long time uh again fuck texas fuck this shit fuck the cat the the reactionary capture of of rural pennsylvania right um because there are good people out there we get to make fun of it yeah there are there are good people there and they're

just suppressed um by uh this this shit out there so Again, fuck all you. Ali, any of your thoughts on that? No, I don't. Alright. Well, I guess sports. Yeah, so the Birds didn't have a perfect season. How about that? I will say

the refs didn't beat the Eagles. The Eagles beat the Eagles. That was a sloppy, shitty play. It was a sloppy, shitty game. I fired John Gannon both A, at halftime and B, into the sun. Fire him at halftime

out of a cannon into the sun. Into the sun, yes. I'm sick of soft zone coverage. Why are you playing contained when you're up by 14? Stop playing contained. Respect your enemy.

Grind them to a pulp. Right. The run defense just isn't there right now. It's frustrating. I know Fletcher Cox is talking about it. Hopefully they sort of iron out the bugs. 8-1 is still an alright place to be. I have no problem with 8-1.

That's a good... This is a good team. And they could have won that game. Yeah, they could have won that game. There was several turnovers. If one less turnover, I would have won that game that there was like several turnovers. Like if one less turnover, one to one that game. Honestly, one less turnover that that last one in the in the with what's his name?

Catching it was a quiz Watkins. Yep. And he got up like and have defended. Yeah, we like was Watkins. Yeah, he just he made a mistake. And then. I'm trying to make a play. Yeah, I was trying.

He was trying. But, you know, know sometimes you gotta let it i mean he getting up i understand but like get that you know cradle that shit um right but you know hindsight is always 2020 i guess uh uh but yeah no it's it's it's uh you don't really have a lot of complaint about it's don't know. I'm in a Phillies hangover, so I'm sports hungover right now. I just haven't been able to really

appreciate the other sports yet just because of all the mental energy I put into the Phillies. It doesn't help that because the Eagles are only once a week and the fucking Sixers suck ass. The Sixers are bad, but we can talk about Joel Embiid's historic night,

which he scored 59 fucking points. He looked absolutely electric. And so Sixers will get it together. I do have confidence in that now. But we should take time out to make fun of the derelict and horrific Brooklyn Nets. We told you. We told you. We did tell you.

This team is frauds and always has been. Ben Simmons can suck my ass. Kyrie Irving can suck my ass. Kevin Durant can suck my ass. Whoever they got, like Royce O'Neal, whoever they fucking got now. my ass, Kyrie Irving can suck my ass, Kevin Durant can suck my ass. Whoever they got, like Royce O'Neal, whoever they fucking got now. It is a team made up at the present moment

of Kevin Durant and friends who he hates. The Sixers fleeced the Nets in the Ben Simmons trade. We should launch some sort of rescue operation for Seth Curry. Seth Curry does not deserve this. Bring him back. Bring him home. It is great fun

to watch them implode. I can't think of a team I wanted to happen to more besides the Lakers, which I'm also getting early in the season as someone who hates the Los Angeles Lakers. This has been great joy for me. I delight in the suffering of Kevin Durant. I feast on it.

It makes me very happy. It fuels you. It gives you reason to wake up in the morning. Yes, his tears bring me great joy. Losing to the Kings like that is just like... Losing. The Kings is a rough way to die. That, that,

how is that? How is that family still on that team? Like how, how, how do you still own that team? How's the team not been shot into the sun yet? Is sort of my question. Bring back this,

this, the Sonics just moving back up. We don't need Sacramento Kings. Just send them back up to Seattle. Seattle deserves a team. Sacramento's not a city. Getting your ass beat by Matthew Delevadova by 32 fucking points is a rough way to go, man.

Yeah, dude. And yeah, we told you about Ben Simmons. We said it. The Nets fans, I think, have already kind of picked it up you know already that this dude is just not good he's just not good he's a good he's okay on defense you know you see when he when he plays he shows flashes but he's never gonna he's never going to improve no he's never gonna work on his game it's just not his thing he's like yeah whatever like hey you know what like we're pro worker like yeah secure the bag my man right you can you can

uh and you're gonna secure the bag but you might get one more chance after than that so then no one's gonna really get take you on any real deal no i mean you'll be bench piece yeah yeah uh joel when he had his 59 point game had outscored ben seven' entire season by 12 points. Beautiful. Very funny. I will say the Boston Celtics look like world killers. It brings me great joy,

obviously, despite Jalen Brown taking every opportunity he can to piss away my goodwill. I just need this team to keep it together just a little bit. Let's, and

speaking of Boston, let's get into Bruins chat. Now, the Boston Bruins are 11-3. They are so good this year. And they're returning pieces. And you will quake and die before the almighty Patrice Bergeron and Brad Marchand for some reason.

Patrice Bergeron, that's the America's Funniest Studios guy, right? Yeah, that's the same guy. Yeah. What else is on this Google Doc? We are struggling. We can talk about on the search of the Boston Bruins.

The Flyers are horrible. Yeah, they're skidding again. Any of you who thought that anything was going to come with that? Like, no, no. That roster needs to be totally rehauled. Overhauled. Rebuild.

Full rebuild. Yeah, full rebuild. Tear it down literally to the studs. Maybe keep Carter Hart kicking around. I feel for Carter Hart, man. I feel for Carter Hart. I feel for Carter Hart. I don't feel anything for him after that whole

rape thing. I forgot about that. If you're interested in learning more about why everything in hockey is terrible, you can look that up about World Hockey Championships, Junior Championships in Ontario a few years ago. We did a pretty decent bit on that.

We did talk about that. Go listen to that one. Bryce Harper needs surgery. We don't know if it's Tommy John surgery. We don't know what the timeline is. It's UCL surgery. Right. Yeah, but we don't know when he'll be back.

I'd say get it done now. Yeah, get it done right now, Bryce. Obviously, we love our big, beefy boy, who's a very strange man. Yeah. Yeah, does he wear the underwear? Please call and let us know. Probably does. Good news, though, for the Eagles, I suppose.

Linval Joseph, formerly of the San Diego Chargers, has signed with the Birds. He's a two-time Pro Bowler. Yes, I did see that. He's 6'4 and 3'29". He's a big boy. Hopefully, he can sort of shore up this run defense because God knows we need the fucking help. Him and Jordan Davis feasting on the bones of... Jordan Davis is out.

Yeah. So is Goddard. He's got a high ankle strain, yeah. Yeah, Goddard's out. Man. So is that a high ankle strain? Yeah. Yeah. God, it's out. Yeah. It's like, man, football just destroys people. Yeah. Don't don't let your kids play it.

It's a lot of propaganda. That's actually a little thing I want to talk about. I was watching Monday Night Football. So I was watching our beloved Philadelphia Eagles piss and shit in their own mouths. And there were a litany of ads for basically letting your kids play football okay yeah i didn't notice that but yeah yeah i noticed numerous ads being like here's how to get your family into football here's how to get your kids into football football's great and it's like as someone who played three years of o-line i can tell you and no don't do it that i i suffered

some pretty debilitating injuries uh i don't walk so good obviously my shoulders are fucked up uh and uh yeah i can't imagine what my body would look like if I had played college ball. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, man, dude. Yeah, that'd be a... Forget about the body for a second. Just about your brain, man. Yeah.

As stated, we've both had numerous concussions. So, yeah, it's tough, man. Don't let your kids fucking play football. No. I do want to also talk about sucking off the troops. Oh our perennial favorite our perennial give it a fucking rest man give it a fucking rest yeah i just want to watch i just want to watch football without having to suck off the flag i don't yeah i don't you know uh shouts out the shocks for uh get former guest shocks for saying the nfl is the only league to let you

fuck actually fuck the flag. Yes. Um, dude, like, all right, we get it. We get it.

Okay. All right. Yeah. You're the, you're the America's league, whatever. We've got to recruit, uh,

all the, they're, they're doing age waivers. Now you could be in your forties and join the coast guard. Now I just found out. So, um, they,

they used to have the lowest one. They used to be 34. Now they're doing 41. All the branches are seeing... Which is good. Stop imperialism. We're on the record saying military should exist just to give nerds a chance

to drive boats around. Purely for defense. Cool machines that we don't use or supply to anybody else we just should have a littoral aircraft carrier yes yes i do i love i very much love a littoral aircraft carrier that is is manned by a citizen's like naval militia that does like uh you know six months every every other year or something like that. And yeah, dude, that fucking rocks, man.

That's like, yeah, you got to keep that shit going. Like the Citizens Tank Brigade. Do we have ammo for the tanks? We got enough to practice with. That's it. There you go. We build fake houses and then we blow them up sounds cool to me genius yeah don't use don't use that shit don't send it to ukraine and

almost started we're like by accidentally shooting into poland uh yeah let's not do that um let's not do that yeah also feel free to unfollow us if you um we am waiting for this take uh feel free to unfollow us if you are thirsting for world war three just please stop please i sort of am you sort of yeah you you need to be as i've said numerous times uh humanity has sort of reached its logical conclusion uh we have we we've we've done enough as a species we can call it uh humanity can only be re uh reinvigorated through some sort of purging of fire uh that will allow people of stronger blood to write that's what you're saying right no i'm seeing it's not eco-fascism if it's everybody yeah i mean everybody every single literal fucking person so every every

the ideology that every like thrash metal band has ever espoused through its cover art yeah basically every mega death album whatever the cover of like an iced earth album from like 2004 is that's that's basically what i want oh yeah yeah i'm thinking i'm thinking of peace cells where it's where it's uh the mega death mask i forget what his name and he's like he's like he he's a skeleton but for some reason his his uh he's got goggles and headphones but his mouth is chained open yeah um and uh he's like he's looking at the nuke. It's scared.

Like, dude, you're a skeleton. You're cool. You're fine, man. Yeah, no,

it's, I, I don't buy into the, we have too many people bullshit or anything like that. It's just a philosophical disagreement with the idea of humanity. Uh, never evolved consciousness is what I'm saying. Ah,

okay. Yeah. So the evolving, the bigger, the bigger, bigger uh the bigger brain case that was my issue is with is with uh the theory of evolution yeah neanderthal that we did it denisovian peak peak of human existence and then cut it off yeah that's right there yeah just only for us yeah uh i i really do love the theory that we really that the reason the neanderthals wouldn't exist would went extinct they didn't really go extinct we just fuck them

into the species yes we just fucked them in yeah we're the horniest goddamn species that's why we thrive we're horny as shit and we like exploring new places and finding new places to fuck. That's why Star Trek, if we ever do discover that, is accurate. Because you will have a captain who's just fucking whenever he can fuck. That's just how it's going to work. That is humanity in a nutshell. I want to find a new cool place to go, and I want to find something new to fuck. Those are the two driving factors of humanity. Yeah, no, i'll buy that and those of you who have

lived through this ramp uh congratulations yes uh sorry i guess the tom pain theory of humanity i mean i mean tell me i'm wrong tell me what separates man from the animals reason and pooping in private yeah we have social we have social learning yeah it's shitting your pants in the gym right yeah if you don't shit your pants if you're an animal you don't even wear pants no you don't figure it out yeah you got it all figured out yeah we man invents pants and has to invent a way to shit out outside of the pants maybe you should get some of those onesie pants with the butt flap so you can just kind of do it on the go. Like old timey? Yeah.

Like Abraham Lincoln? Yes. Ask your wife to get you Christmas jammies that you can shit out the back of. Going out to the outhouse with my ass exposed in the middle of the winter? Like how we used to do things in the good old days. Yes. Back when men were men and women were women. And died of diphtheria at 27.

Yeah, and you had nine kids and three of them lived. And you just reused the same name for each of them. Josiah 1, Josiah 2, Josiah 3, Mary, Josiah 4, Mary 2. Man, dude, that fucks with genealogy so bad if you're ever into

that. oh my god like man just pick a new name it's fine millions of them yeah Braxton what was that Braxton Daxton whatever the fucking shit is now oh yeah Braden

Jaden Aiden those people should be shot to the sun yeah my one conservative take is the the ice in iceland they have it right where you have to have your name approved by the government before you name your kid something i

i just i think it's i i actually uh believe that that's probably fine just for a lot of people though yeah well i i i do think i wonder purely hypothetically that would cut down on implicit bias oh are we going to freakonomics here yeah would it i don't i don't know man i'm i'm just some asshole with a podcast uh well that that chapter in freakonomics it was

was is called would a sheniqua by any other names uh you know it was about nominative determinism. But yeah, would it cut down on bias and stuff like that? Braxton with a Q for some reason. Yeah, with a Q. I was going to say T, but yeah.

There's a Batman symbol? I don't know. Shouts out to our Tipping Pitches people who saw me in the Tipping Pitches fans, the people who saw me in the Tipping Pitches chat say there's no Q in Italian when I was in the fugue state. And then getting mocked. So, because there is a Q in Italian.

Yeah, it's uno, due, tre, quattro. So it's right there. It's number four. All right. Fuck. We're going to hit 45. We're going to hit 45. We're going to hit 45. Here we go.

After I cut my stupid fucking dumbass brain. Okay. All right. Yeah. So we do have one voicemail this week from Bobby. I think this is Bobby from West Virginia. Is that Western Maryland? Or is it Western Maryland?

Same difference. There's like a little narrow. It's not, sir. They're right next to each other. Hold the fucking voicemail, Tom. All right, hold on. Here we go. Hey, Tom.

Hey, Liam. This is Bobby from Western Maryland again. See him. Thanks for taking my last call and coming out of the Bobby Positive podcast. It's very nice of you. I believe that you are the first Bobby Positive podcast. I'd also like to thank ask if you guys also think that the NFL salute to service thing is just

the most cuffed shit in the world, considering the fact that the U.S. Army murdered and then covered up the murder of the NFL's most famous veteran, Pat Tillman. It genuinely takes away from the enjoyment of the NFL's most famous veteran, Pat Tillman. It genuinely takes away from the enjoyment of the game, even though my Packers knocked out the dreaded Cowboys this weekend. And also just another thing that I noticed, they pointed out on the Thursday night football game that Arthur Smith was the salute to service nominee for the Falcons.

You guess each team nominates someone or whatever. And he's the son of Frederick Smith, who invented, or not invented, but founded FedEx. That's just insane to me. And then they did this whole detailed, or not detailed, but just an overview of Fred Smith, Arthur Smith's dad, and his military service in Vietnam. And they talked about how, you know, whatever, his dad was a great fucking American warrior.

Whatever. Well, just look up Fred Smith. Go to his Wikipedia, and you'll quickly find out that he has killed at least two people in at least two different car crashes, one of which was a hit and run that he obviously faced no punishment for.

So, yeah, that's who Amazon and Thursday Night Football shouted out last week. That was fun. So I guess fuck Arthur Smith Smith I kind of liked him before that so yeah fuck the NFL for doing this loot service stuff whatever and thanks for taking my call go pack go

fuck the Yankees fuck the Bears fuck Penn State and fuck Arthur Smith hey Jim love you bud we're going to say fuck you, Jim, just because you said go Pats. He said go Pack. Oh, Pack? Yeah, he was talking about the Packers.

I'll give a shit. Okay. All right, resend it. I got to look up this Fred Smith killing people. Who are Arthur Smith? Maybe they both killed guys. I mean, Laura Bush killed a guy. Oh, well, we know George Bush killed

3,000. I don't believe that, guys. All right. Well, I mean, his lack of responding to intelligence. That's what killed him. Yeah, no, he did have forgery, indictment, and car crash. his lack of responding to intelligence. That's what killed. Um, all right. Uh,

yeah, no, he did have a, he did have forgery indictment in car crash. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, the cause of the crash was never determined.

Yeah. Yeah. Marine Corps service. He's a forward air controller in Vietnam. Yeah. He was in skull and bones. Yeah. Uh, yeah. He's a, heull and Bones. He was an officer. Excuse me.

My Vietnam veteran support I give is to the weird number of 70-year-old Americans and 80-year-olds Americans in Saigon who speak perfect Vietnamese and have Vietnamese families.

Shouts out to those guys. Coming back, Mary. Fuck this shit. I put that peace sign on my helmet for a reason. They fucking come back. Yeah, so... Shit, I don't know where I was going with that. I'm delusional at this point. You're very tired, yeah. So, um, so shit, I don't know where I was going with that.

I'm, I'm delusional at this point. Yes. Uh, shit. Any other thoughts on that? Did I miss anything? No, I mean, it's, it's, he's right. Like obviously the sucking off the flag is a little much. Yes.

Turning this all into some sort of you know great cover for the military which does not need the hype uh and the nfl's feel goods is pretty disgusting in terms of cultural imperialism um yeah yeah i i fuck fedex by the way because ups is union and they're not yep yep uh Use UPS whenever you can. Well, use the postal service whenever you can. If they don't take it, like it's a beer shipment or something like that. Yeah, UPS. We have a bonus episode with Francis from Hellway to Die about this.

It's actually not too long ago. I think it was in August we did that. So August or July. So So yeah go check that out If you hate that bullshit Go to patreon.com Sign up for a dollar Alright So

Anything else No I got nothing Alright Shouts out to our North Catholic tier patrons Kate H Steven D D., Sean P., Patrick M. I didn't have to delete one of you, like I said, because Patreon is weird and sometimes hides people. And I'm saying, and if you're a 700, if you signed up for the 700 level tier and I'd never shout you out, let me know. I think I've gotten everyone now, but we don't have any new

ones this week. But please, let me know if for some reason I missed you. As we get out of here, voicemail 267-371-7218. Give us your name and pronouns. Or you can send us a DM. DM and follow us. We're on Twitter at

2000losses. I'm Matt Tehicatee Payne. He'm at take a t-pain he's at non liam anderson with a zero because he's elite uh we already did the patreon listen to other podcasts uh you've got like five more podcasts now that you

just joined apparently over uh yeah yeah uh who knows man uh listen to the big ones uh find some by donkeys well there's your problem see it or screw it I don't know when I'm recording uh and then uh yeah

uh give us your fucking money that's my advice yeah our friends podcast too and uh um yeah we should probably give like some pity money to uh our friends over at bring them young money for uh letting Joel and B just destroy their jazz so yeah

yeah all right guys uh gals i better pals everybody goodbye and uh we'll see you next time No one likes us, no one likes us, no one likes us, we don't care. We're from Philly, fucking Philly, no one likes us, we don't care.