Ten Thousand Losses - The Startening
Episode Date: October 18, 2021Our actual first full episode! Follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/tenklossespod Leave us a voicemail: 267-371-7218 Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/tenthousandlosses ...
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and we're good all right we're recording all right uh hi welcome to untitled philly sports
podcast uh i'm liam you may know me from lions led by donkeys from well there's your problem
uh and my co-host is tom you want to introduce yourself yeah uh i'm i'm tom pain you might know me from being a
shit poster on the internet that you probably don't know me um uh yeah i'm i'm uh i'm a an
asshole from kensington if you couldn't tell uh from the accent which which is gonna be very
confusing to anyone who actually listens to this and if they're from the uk they'll be like oh well you you guys had that conversation hey yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah uh if you're listening to this and you're not one of
our parents uh uh kensington is a a working class neighborhood in philadelphia uh do not confuse it
with kensington in the uk uh because you'll probably get stabbed at some point but that's
that's fine yeah yeah definitely
don't don't be british wandering around kensington in philly um not a good idea no that would be bad
yeah uh yeah so that's what uh uh qualifies tom to be on here is he's actually from philly
uh i uh i am not although i have adopted certain philly sports teams as my own
uh besides the goddamn flyers who i hate
uh yeah uh i got laid off slash fired recently so this is what i'm doing in my spare time. So I know a lot of you who listen to this pilot are probably not familiar with Philly sports.
That's OK. We're going to get into it.
Well, we'll we'll we'll do our best to not do some sports radio shit where you have to, you know, go do Indiana Jones to understand what the hell they're talking about.
So, all right, yeah, what's up, Coach?
First time in a long time listening to Dave from Delco.
And I just want to talk about how, you know,
we need to trade for Nick Foles to get him back.
Jalen Hurts, he's a bum.
You know, he hasn't won anything in his first three games.
And, yeah, like that.
Yeah, yeah, we're not doing that uh we will do our best
to uh also not do the sports radio casual racism oh oh yes that's that's so good i love yeah i love
it i i love like oh no we need our white savior quarterback back who's not even playing for the
fucking chicago bears right now because that's how good he is yeah and i i
think he's got one knee i mean he has two knees but i think he has one knee left functional at
any given time sometimes between the two yeah yeah hot swap that knee out good luck nick
yeah all right let's start with our right. So a little bit of background. We're going to we're going to do all four sports. Some of these may be more thorough than others, depending on what's happened that week. And I don't really give a shit about the Flyers. So I got to do more is get away from the main line of thought in sports discussions which is fans
cosplaying as gms yeah uh because we both hate that we're both uh pro worker pro labor and that
can make discussions in sports uh especially with philly fans fucking intolerable yeah uh so we're lowering ourselves
into the echo chamber and agreeing with each other the entire show yeah there will be there's no
ideological differences between us or anything like that no none none at all no whatsoever uh
and yeah there's no art you know philly sports there's no contention there i mean we're we're
a city known for our you know brotherly love and you know we Philly sports, there's no contention there. I mean, we're a city known for our, you know, brotherly love.
And, you know, we've never – we never hurt each other.
No, no, no, no.
All right, let's get into it.
Let's talk about Ben Simmons.
So, for those of you who don't know, Ben Simmons was drafted out of LSU,
number one overall by the Philadelphia 76 76ers our city's basketball team in
2016 uh he uh showed a lot of promise his first few years he's still really fucking good at
basketball but he has decided that he does not want to play another day in a Sixers uniform for a myriad of reasons.
He has basically cut off all contact with the team and his teammates and is demanding a trade.
So let's talk about why that is and how we got here.
Yeah.
You want to go ahead or you want me to go ahead?
Yeah, you can start. Sure. So Ben Simmons go ahead uh well yeah you can you can uh start
sure so ben simmons so for those of you who don't know the modern nba requires you if you're a point
guard which ben simmons is to shoot the three uh it requires a lot of spacing between dudes on the
floor uh forcing defenses to make quick changes you can then exploit those you can exploit
uh their lack of switching to score points uh but ben simmons and our our our big boy
our star joellen bead the process himself the process himself have duplicative skill sets uh and ben simmons from certain reports basically
wants to be the star and isn't comfortable sharing the spotlight with joelle uh and there are a lot
of fans who basically want to cut him and trade him for nothing yeah uh it's worth noting that ben simmons did sign a four-year i believe
147 million dollar contract was it super max uh i don't think so no because he didn't make uh he
didn't get some of the qualifiers right right right it's like all nba first team or something
but a lot of money yeah uh more money than we'll ever see yeah now all that said uh there are a lot of money. Yeah. Uh, more money than we'll ever see. Yeah. Now, all that said,
uh,
there are a lot of people,
uh,
who,
who,
who want,
who basically are like Ben Simmons is ungrateful and they should bench him.
And then,
you know,
I don't know,
do a hate crime to him or something.
Yeah.
I mean,
I mean,
I mean,
I,
there's so much to unpack because there is a there is a um a truth
to the fact about ben that there is a kind of like shitty um aspect to it where he's like he's
not blameless at all oh for sure um but it's not all him like and the the thing with the thing with the the we were talking about
like this gm mindset like franchise mode has broken every like every sports fan's brain like
you play like 2k or whatever and you think of players as these like pieces and and it's like
on like would you say like uh subtle not deliberate gm propaganda so and philly sports fans begin
with already think that they own the teams um i mean the city should own the team but that's
yes no yeah collectivize the sixers yes absolutely do it do a packers on every every uh yes no that
but unironically yeah and um yeah like like, like he,
he's a good player is a phenomenal defender, which is something that,
you know you listen to sports radio and they're going to be like, you know,
he's a bum, he's a bum, he doesn't know how to play.
And that kind of stuff is even, you know, crept up with,
with the professional athletes, you know, like the inside,
the NBA guys coming down hard on them too,
because he doesn't change up his game. And every summer we get the,
the, the, you know, he's playing some like high school shooting threes.
And we're like, Oh yeah, Ben's got a jumper. He's coming, you know? Um,
and it doesn't happen. Um, but yeah, so he's not playing.
He doesn't want to play with us.
Which, I mean, if you were Ben, would you ever want to come back to Philadelphia?
Oh, hell no, dude.
Yeah.
Absolutely not.
Yeah.
Yeah, I don't blame him.
I mean, I think so.
I have had this little pet theory about Ben and Joel basically since they drafted Ben,
which was that the Sixers took Ben
and were just like, we're just going to make him fit.
And he and Joel have very similar skill sets.
They can both dominate the post.
And they play well together simply because they're so big
and they have such an outsized physical advantage.
But my thing is, like, I would much rather you run some sort of, like,
platoon style where you say to Ben, all right, fine, like,
you don't need to play alongside Joel, but you're not starting.
Right.
And I don't think he'd be okay with that.
No, I don't either
because he goes and you know he was the number one overall pick he he's one of the best defenders
in the nba and he does merit a starting position you know uh it was funny you said platoon i'm
thinking well he is a lefty my My baseball brain kicks in with that.
But yeah, no, they don't have and they don't have they have overlapping skill sets.
I mean, Ben is definitely a better passer. Oh, yeah.
And he can make magic out of nothing. Yeah.
I mean, he relies on it too much and he can he's got really quick, like lateral movement.
And he's he's just like he's he's much
he's much faster um i mean he's he's he's quite especially for his size what is he 6 10 6 he's 6
10 yeah yeah he's very very quick for his size um so i can understand that he wants to be on a team
where he's going to be the guy and i mean that's so common in the nba where you got the guy and you build your team
around them and when you've got two guys who are really you know i mean joel's like a post-up guy
you know and ben can do that you know although he has he kind of shies away from contact a bit
which is a big detriment um but i totally like understand like
like imagine you're at a job like think of this from the labor perspective and it's like you and
the and some other guy on the same team and you both have the same skill set and you're kind of
like well i'm being wasted here put me in another department or something right no it's not it's a
very human desire and like one of the things you know we hit on it is that there's
ben simmons has the right to want to play for whatever team he wants to uh i felt the same
way about anthony davis when he sat out in on the pelicans he especially with that team's
very questionable uh medical treatments of him.
But I will say it is frustrating as a fan to watch a guy basically refuse to shoot because he might get embarrassed that he's missing free throws.
Yeah.
I mean, that's like a sports psychology.
I know that sports psychology, there's a lot of bullshit in that.
The dude just has the y Is that like, I know that like sports psychology is, there's a lot of bullshit in that, you know, but like,
the dude just has the yips.
Yeah,
I guess,
you know,
I,
I mean,
there's a running joke.
you know,
I'm a teacher and the one PE teacher,
he coaches,
he coaches,
um,
a fairly competitive,
uh,
uh,
local like private school team.
And he,
he actually knows like some NBA guys guys and he jokes he's like you
got a better jumper than ben and it's like i suck i'm five foot ten white guy fat white guy
um but it's it's yeah it's something he has the ability to do and so i wonder how much of this is kind of like, you know, we talk about like an ego thing.
I hate to bring up team player stuff because there's a lot of like racial coding around that.
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, maybe less so in the NBA because it does have such a strong union and, you know, players are fairly free to speak their mind compared to other sports.
But yeah, there's something there about not wanting to... If you're playing on a team, the coach kind of has the big picture in mind.
Once you shoot, you should shoot.
Obviously, there should be some sort of like team decision-making process.
It shouldn't just be the coach.
But, you know, I don't know.
I'm not in that huddle, you know.
Right, right, right.
And, yeah, it's interesting.
So at this point in the process, pun not intended, he's not showing up for camp he's he's being his i
think his pay is an escrow his pay is an escrow yeah they put the first quarter of his they put
some amount i think it was like eight million in escrow yeah uh because he's due i think like 32
million this season yeah um yeah it's it's it's crazy and he's just he's perfectly
prepared to sit and uh i will say you know a lot of philly fans are basically like just caught him
yeah i mean i think i like i don't think the relationship could be repaired at this point
personally no no no there's no i don't think there is either. But I think one of the things that our beloved city's fans do
is turn this, like, what you were hitting on earlier
with racially coded language.
Yeah.
He's a bum, he's a bum, he's a bum.
And, like, you know, Markel Fultz looks pretty decent in Orlando right now.
Yeah.
He doesn't maybe look like a number one overall pick,
but, like, I don't think the team is blameless. pretty decent in orlando right now yeah he doesn't maybe look like a number one overall pick but like
i i don't think the team is blameless like i think the team you know after
mate like the team is one bounce away from getting to the nba finals
if kawaii doesn't hit that shot in 2018 or whatever yeah yeah i mean that was that was like uh man i i love that dude for his
that that man can just uh that's another that's another topic right he's he's there was such a
dagger to the heart but like you're like i wouldn't i would rather like any other way like
it went i would rather lose to that than like some dumb shit yeah you'd rather you and like the sixers in that game
forgot how to play basketball except for jimmy butler oh yeah final five minutes jimmy butler
like he hit the the nas button and or activated that psychopath part of his brain and like just
absolutely you know i don't know he was thinking about his what was it like he had a he
had like fish tank on his on his bike or something like that uh just had to get home early yeah yeah
yeah he had i remember i remember i don't know how true it is because it was like you know like
the 2k commentary talking about jimmy butler like oh this guy's eccentric you hear it like a million
times uh as you're playing the game and he's like, yeah, he used to have like a fish tank on his bicycle
or some bullshit like that.
No, I believe – you can tell me anything about Jimmy Butler
and I would believe it.
He's one of my favorite players to watch just because like a lot of the dudes
try to sort of hide their like unrelenting psychopathy, not Jimmy.
Yeah, it's in that vein of Michael Jordan.
Like I am going to dominate
my opponents you know see them driven before me and hear the lamentation of their women
uh kind of shit and you the competitive part of me admires that you know um but yeah the the
rounding back to the sort of racism coded language you know it's something you see
you know we'll talk about this when we get to the eagles um you know there's that kind of stuff too
but there's a philly sports guy thing where you just love to take shots at at um black players
and in this case there's an excuse and i don't know how much of it is overt versus that sort of
like you know was it unconscious bias sure but um you know yeah think think of it from like a like
like a like a labor standpoint though like hey people think they own the team yeah like that's
gonna like that's gonna present itself as as thinking you also own the players.
Or at the very least that they're simply assets and not human beings with worries and fears and hopes.
Right. And that's the crux.
And with the Sixers' perspective, they're viewing him as an asset to be traded, which, I mean, obviously that's part of the sport,
but all these guys calling in to the sports radio stuff,
it's like 95% of them are working stiffs,
and you should have some sort of solidarity or whatever with that
and being like, the sixers front office is using
this holdout to their advantage and they've played it media wise it's been a coup for them
in the sense in the sense of they've made themselves entirely blameless
right and philly is on the sixer side i mean the everyone loves daryl Morey and – yeah.
So they have – Ben is the villain.
And, you know, he's not a villain.
He's an unhappy player.
You know, he's got – you know, there's legitimate issues, but he's not like a bad –
I don't know if he's a bad guy or not personally.
But he's not like – he's not the it like a bad like i don't know if he's a bad guy or not personally but he's not like he's not the the darth vader of this right no he's just a guy who
wants to play on a different team and has probably gone about it in the worst way possible but
yeah yeah because because you know him not hold him holding out you know that drops his value
which is kind of like an f you to the i concur, I concur. It's a fuck you to the team.
Yeah, of course.
And they...
I mean, they want to get some sort of value out of it.
I don't know. I mean...
I don't know how this resolves.
I don't think he's coming back, like we said that.
But, you know, the other thing, too, from a labor standpoint
is, like, you know,
he was sort of criticized publicly by his boss by the coach uh by doc um what was his can can
ben be a point guard on a was it a title winning team or something to that because i don't know
yeah yeah and that's sort of i wouldn't want to fucking come back either man yeah it's like
you know you criticize it's it's weird because
it's for everything is in public but like you know you're supposed to like that kind of shit
supposed to be behind closed doors you know you know like like you that kind of criticism should
come from him like hey dude you gotta this is this is a serious issue now you know and then like
you know blame yourself because you're the coach and and praise him for
his skills that he does have i mean defensive player was he runner-up or did he win it last
year i can't remember i think he was runner-up yeah um for defensive player of the year it's
like yeah well you know yeah he can be because you know he can cover everybody and then you
you end up having like i don't know like danny green trying to cover someone uh you know someone
like kawaii or anyone who's like you know that that high tier guard and it's not gonna it's not
gonna work no and i i mean i would be my other thing is like if you used him in a way that was
like all right motherfucker i don't even want you to shoot like i want you to play lock in defense the entire 36 minutes you're
on the floor yeah uh and we'll and someone else could be the point guard i will basically use a
twin towers model i think that actually maybe works yeah but who knows uh yeah don't have
them as a point guard like you know have him as a power forward yeah exactly like you occasionally you drive to the rim if you're open you you know if there's if there's
a clear path in front of you you drive to the rim yeah and uh make contact like we're gonna
jury on three free throws no one cares if you shoot a three anymore or not yeah you know blah
blah blah but uh why don't, in the interest of time,
press on to the Phillies, your baby.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, the Phillies.
Yeah, baseball is my first love and my greatest agony.
And I think when you drafted the outline,
you said it best, it's pissing away Bryce Harper's season. I mean, I think when you drafted the outline, you said it best is pissing away
Bryce Harper season.
I mean, that was an MVP caliber season and, and this team is just, I mean, what is it?
10 years now without playoffs.
Yep.
Yeah.
So what's so, you know, I, uh, baseball is not my first love.
Football is my first love.
Yeah.
Uh, what dude, what is going on with this team?
Like what the fuck is going on with this team like what the fuck is going on
with this team because it feels like i was watching every like i was watching highlight
and every game bryce harper was attempting to like break reality all by himself like yeah
i was at a phillies game a few months ago and he hit uh like there was like an inside the park
home run yes uh i was at that
game with a couple friends and my girlfriend and like it felt like every game especially
into september that's what he was doing every game and they didn't even make the playoffs
yeah what what happened i i mean he's a he's a he's a very good player. I don't think this team...
The team is not really a team.
It's a collection of guys.
And like I said, I don't know how deep you follow,
but basically the new GM, Dave DeBrasio,
came in halfway through the offseason last year,
waited until September to basically fire
the entire player development team and replace them.
And the team was essentially a collection of free agents.
And because baseball has this luxury tax thing,
and there's no hard salary, so it serves as a soft salary cap.
And some teams don't care.
And the Phillies owner, John Milton, billionaire, is worried that if he goes over the luxury tax, he's going to have to pay like – and it's going to be like an extra $8 million a year, which is like a starting – like a number four starting pitcher.
Right. like a number four starting pitcher right because i remember uh i'm a boston boy by trade and the
red sox pissed went right through it a few years ago yeah and their reward was to win the world
series yeah and you you do that because you want to win um there i mean seriously like like i could
i could brain about this for an hour.
About this damn... How baseball is set up and
it's got an antitrust exception
and the ownership is particularly...
We'll do that. We just need more content.
Next week. Next week.
But the
preview...
I've got to work on my DJ voice.
Yeah, the preview for next week um is uh how bad mlb owners are uh oh yeah oh fuck dude yeah welcome to uh antitrust exemption yeah
yeah let's talk about what was the fucking uh was it the cardinals or someone who got fined for basically
trafficking dominicans uh it might it might have been um yeah there's a there's another get fined
for it uh there's another fucking problem because they have like basically these like slave labor
camps in dominican republic um where i have to do a little more research see how much they're paid
i'm sure they're not paid much um you with these baseball academies down and down in dominican republic it it's it's a
the whole dominican summer league it's it's a it's a fucking uh jesus christ yeah i'm just
getting mad it's so exploitative it it's it's the oldest sport. The sport had its origins in pre-slavery United States, and it shows.
There you go.
Oh, jeez.
Yeah.
You're not wrong.
Yeah.
No.
I mean, they were playing baseball in the Civil War.
You're not wrong.
Yeah, and it shows. MLB Players Association has rung out, has been rung out in so much, you know,
real trauma and pain, you know,
for lots of different communities.
But anyway, back to the Phillies.
Speaking of trauma and pain.
Yeah, speaking of trauma and pain.
Literally, the losing is, I don't know,
if anyone from the UK listens to this,
tell me if there's
a franchise that of like soccer like a football team in the in the uk because i know that shit
goes back to like 1840s or whatever like that has 10 000 losses because the phillies do they're the
literally the losingest yes franchise on this continent i don't know it might be in all
professional sports they are i know they are well i mean i we have to do we have like a medieval historian we could find like to see if like the the blues or the greens
and the fucking constantinople who was losing his gladiator um but yeah i so i think you only lose
being a gladiator once at least right yeah right yeah uh fucking nero doesn't like it you're done which is a power that MLB owners wish they had
yeah so
this fear of spending money
despite having lots of money
a treat coming with rich assholes
means that
instead of spending
the money on developing
minor league talent,
which is what good teams do.
That's why the Dodgers are so damn good.
It's why Tampa Bay is so damn good,
despite it being just a shit team to play for.
You know, by all accounts,
the Phillies aren't that bad when it comes to minor league stuff,
but they crapped out on development.
They made bad trades.
And they signed all of these aging dudes.
And Bryce Harper was a good signing.
He's a phenomenal player.
But you got this generational talent.
Home run, slugger guy. Just insane OPS. this generational talent home run
slugger guy, you know, just
insane OPS
and who do you put in front
of him? Oduble Herrera?
Like that's... The domestic
violence guy? Oh yeah, the guy who choked his
girlfriend and she dropped charges.
A cop witnessed him choking his girlfriend
too, I believe. Or witnessed the
ligature marks on her neck.
I think that's what it was.
Very normal sport.
Yeah, who swings a bat like he's a samurai
beheading a peasant that walked in front of him.
You know, every swing is like that.
So the Phillies don't put anyone in front
we have like Didi Gregorius who we signed
who I like, he's by all accounts
a cool dude
and he's like defensively the worst
shortstop in the league and that's like the position
where you need a guy to be a good fielder
and he sucks
and
yeah I'm trying to think
like who's homegrown
like Reese Hoskins is uh
alec bohm who got sent down the triple a who sucks i mean he doesn't suck he's fine he's fine
he's he had a shitty second year but that's this is because um the uh the phillies had
conflicting like you would get up to to the majors and they would tell you one thing.
And then you go back down to triple A and they would tell you another thing
on your swing.
And we had this like player development contract with driveline,
which is a,
you know,
it was kind of like the exit velocity and launch angle kind of dudes.
And apparently I read a long article in the athletic about it.
And,
and,
you know,
that fucked up all these dudes.
Fucked up their swings.
Fucked up the fundamentals.
Are they doing this for AAA dudes, or are they doing this for guys in the majors?
Both.
They had a player development contract.
Got it.
Some of the guys liked it. Some of the guys didn't.
Well, they fired the hitting coach.
So we'll see what happens.
And, you know, there's no homegrown pitching that's relatively decent outside of like Ranger Suarez.
I mean, Aaron Na stunk this year but um you know i i think i think another thing uh you know is the whole joe gerardi dumb shit like i don't know about him and it seems
like that he that there's no confidence in in him from dave dobrowski there was a press conference
where he's like oh he's got a club option for 2023 oh Oh, I didn't know that. You know? Yeah. Not,
not the,
not the,
not,
not,
not,
not,
not the shrivings of a well-run organization.
So,
so I,
so I think that,
you know,
it'd be interesting to see what Dombrowski does this year in terms of
having a full off season to work with the team.
But you don't have,
you don't have the homegrown talent.
I think it's the biggest thing.
And, you know, minor being a minor leaguer sucks ass.
Um, and, uh, I, I don't, I don't know how much people are familiar with, but like, I,
you make more as a substitute teacher than you do playing single a ball, unless you're
like a top, uh, top five rounds traffic.
Um, you know, they make what, like $400 a week. I think it is. like a top five round draft pick.
They make, what, like $400 a week, I think it is?
Yeah, it's starvation wages.
Yeah, and this could be a whole other thing we talk about, but like the working conditions,
and you're starting to see actually some major leaguers wear this,
was it Fair Play or something like that,
there's a hashtag on it about minor league uh the conditions in the minor league there was like that picture of like i think
it was the giants had uh this is this is what they're feeding us and it was like a it was two
slices of white bread uh a slice of like american like craft singles and then like a tomato and some
lettuce and then some coleslaw and it's like here's your food for after the game yeah yeah yeah and you're supposed you're
expecting them to like develop into major league ball players on that yeah you're supposed to get
strong as shit on that like but also like you like one of the one of the things uh you know
more about this than me you sent me the articles but that we should talk about is is that fair play initiative and the idea that basically i mean i don't know all that much about
it beyond like i know a little bit but the idea that essentially these dudes with billions of
dollars are simply not paying their minor leaguers and major league baseball at behest of the owners
is attempting to squeeze the minor leagues, sort of.
Yeah.
You know, combine the teams and do a bunch of just wrecking minor league ball.
Because they just don't want to fucking pay these dudes.
Like, at the end of the day, they just don't want to pay these dudes.
Yeah.
Essentially, because of this antitrust exemption and then the saving America's pastime act that fucking Congress passed a couple years ago.
Which, hey, guess what? Guess what, guys?
Baseball's not going anywhere.
Like, you know,
it's like, well, we're saving the pastime notes.
You're just helping pad the
owner's paycheck. Right.
There's no minimum wage for minor league baseball
players.
You spend your entire life on
the road. It's a hard
fucking life, man. Genuinely yeah it's a hard fucking life man
genuinely like a hard fucking life i i mean i have a i have a buddy who was a minor leaguer
and he left in uh see he uh was it rookie advanced or low a they changed some of the
designations uh because they in the process like gutting like 40 different minor league teams they
didn't pay for um and it was like i couldn't you
know he's like i couldn't do it anymore like i was sick of being on the road i was sick of not
being around my wife like it it sucks and uh back in september there was like the phillies and mets
minor leagues players wore this fair play uh wristbands and And you know,
apparently the Phillies are way better than the Mets are to their minor leaguers.
But
none of them are that good.
I think it's like the Royals who are the best to them.
But it's like,
are these guys, like these guys are afraid
to speak out because they could get fired.
They could get fired.
And have nothing to show for it.
And you're like some 40 rounder. imagine you're some 40 round draft pick right
and you know your entire life you're like and you're like some like relief pitcher or something
and like like like am i going to speak out or or am i going to lose my one chance at this i was
reading an article the other day it was i forget who it was but the guy said by
by the time i made it to the major leagues and left i made half a million dollars i actually
lost money over this over the course of my career he like like he had a net loss right you know uh
of of you know and you can think about five hundred thousand dollars you know over 10 years of a career hey fifty thousand dollars a year like so you can imagine
like how what you have to pay and and this is just doing what this ends up doing is it's just
going to make and this is a problem in every sport where the sport is becoming more and more for like
the kids of former players or for rich kids and like pork where where you have the
stereotype of sports being a way for poor kids to get out of like you know shitty situations
that's becoming more and more rare um because it's become increasingly unaffordable especially
in baseball to just have like a batting coach and this and that and the third yeah since like the
third grade yeah and you know you gotta be on like three different
fucking travel teams and all this shit and and baseball is cheap compared to like being a hockey
kid but uh yeah that's it's all that's this whole set of problems that fucking sucks
all right let's uh let's move to the centerpiece of this episode, the goddamn Philadelphia Eagles.
Yeah.
We should have the Go Birds drop, like, edit.
Oh, I can probably edit that in.
Go Birds.
Go Birds.
Yeah.
All right.
With the Minnesota mom being like, you don't respect the people of Minnesota.
It's like, yeah.
Well, yeah, goddamn right I don't.
No, fuck you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
At least we're open about being dicks.
I'm one 128th Ojibwe.
You fucked my people over. Fuck you, Minnesota.
Fucking garbage state for garbage people.
My ex's dad is actually originally from Minnesota.
He's a Vikings fan, and he did have a sweater. He had a sweatshirt that he had custom printed with the Vikings logo on the front.
And on the back, it says, please, Lord, just once before I die.
My my wife lived two years in Minnesota and she like genuinely refuses to talk about it.
I can't. No, man. It's no. Give it to Canada.
Yeah. Yeah. They'll do a better job, I guess.
Yeah.
Man.
So the birds.
It's been real fucking ugly.
Yeah.
As we're recording this, we're getting ready at 1 o'clock.
They're going to be playing the Panthers.
Against the league's rushing touchdown leader, sam dartle somehow yeah i i don't i
i'm nonplussed yeah i don't know what to say to that um
it it oh my god it's it's insane but yeah uh you're talking about rants the the the
knock yourself out tom the fucking penalties yeah, dude, it's intolerable.
Yeah.
The NFL,
for those of you who don't watch the NFL
because your brains still work normal,
the league has cracked down on taunting,
but in true NFL fashion,
it has not really defined what taunting is,
and it fucking sucks to watch.
There's shit where, like like a guy like uh i think on the on the uh the raiders basically called a ball and
emphatically threw it at the ground as he set that about they call it for a 15-yard taunt and i was
just like dude this is fucking unwatchable i i would rather watch like you know terrell owens like shit you're like
trying to do pull-ups on the fucking crossbar like that's what makes it fun like you have this
shit in baseball too where like the guys do bat flips and stuff and people get all mad
no make it fun make it enjoyable like i want these dudes to hate each other like that makes
it all the better yeah like like it's it's the closest thing to like a like a
combat sport that's like you know not a combat sport you know these guys i honestly i kind of
feel guilty liking football because same there's no way to not get cte right You will get CTE. On a timeline long enough, you will get CTE.
You can't not get CTE
if you are...
You don't have to get concussion. You just have to
bang your head a lot. Right. Which happens
every play. Yeah. Every single play.
So they would have to
get rid of the helmets and do rugby tackles or something.
Which, actually,
that's a whole other topic. I'd watch that, though.
Yeah, I would watch that. I would watch that.
Cause rugby's fun as fuck to watch.
Uh,
every time that I've stumbled upon it,
um,
blurry,
I had like seven.
I had,
yeah,
that's,
that's something I think like,
um,
you know,
being a millennial,
like the zoomers don't have that.
We had like ESPN two,
like at like two in the morning and like Australian rules football or Canadian.
You've watched some weird shit.
Yeah. Yeah. And it was like, dude, this is fucking cool like um but yeah the whole penalty
thing but like you know we're getting holding uh which is not a real penalty it's not real
holding doesn't exist i mean i i played freshman football um and didn't make jv because i suck ass
but uh uh i know you play I know you play too,
but I play defensive end, and I know that every play there was holding.
Yeah, I'm playing left tackle, man.
I'm playing guard.
I'm the second most important position out there.
My hands are up.
I am holding.
I do not care.
Yeah, I remember I only actually got to play in a full game. I do have care. Yeah. I remember, like, I only actually got to play, like, in a full game.
I do have half a sack to my credit.
But I remember the one time lining up against the – I played, like, weak side end.
And so I'm lining up against – I think it was, like, the right tag or whatever.
And he grabs me by, like – he literally grabs my, like, my shoulder pads and, like, with his fingers, pinched my nipples.
And I'm like,
dude, what the fuck? But that just motivated
me to swim out of the block harder.
Catholic school, man.
I will say,
my one...
This is my...
This is one of my good stories.
I played
on O-Line and uh we had a
number of interest so i got shifted around a lot but we all did yeah and uh we were playing i want
to say central dauphin one of the schools up in dauphin county which is where harrisburg is
yeah that that like it's a public school but it's it's a it's a talent factory for kids. They have a really well-run football program there.
And I'm in a highlight tape, but not for me.
So this DB lines up across from me.
I'm 6'1 and like 210 at the time.
So I'm a big boy.
This guy who lines up across from me is like 6'5, 305.
Oh, geez. And, i dude i'm in stance i get my hands up and he just he just pancakes me dude i don't have a chance and like he he ended up i
think either committing i think he committed either to pitt or clemson and i remember watching
that i'd be like oh that's me like getting just not even a chance to get my like to to block no there's just me
getting my ass handed i'm getting like chuck benerick you know absolutely i just got trucked
like and i was like i'm not even mad like i've never had a chance to beat this fucking kid like
yeah no that's like the kawaii leonard thing it's like you know what
fucking the uh game recognized game i guess oh my god well you know my thing too is like with
these penalties and the holding all this shit uh you know will the giant watch these these big
plays get called back constantly like yeah it's sick like fumble recoveries pick sixes and shit
are all getting called back and it's like it makes it impossible to watch and every game takes four fucking hours and and you know like false start kills me because like hard count
like you know what the count is going in like like out of the huddle like they tell you what
the count is right like you know and and the question is you know with with our our kind of
scaredy linemen will the giant panther make them even more scared?
We should talk about the giant augmented reality panther.
Yeah.
I can't believe that's a sentence I have to say.
I want the NFL Gundams to fight it.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
You'd watch that.
That's a half-time entertainment show.
Yeah.
Just some CGI.
Because what is it?
One of them, is it fox or is it
one of the they have like these weird ass graphics i'm not sure if it's the fox box is the gundam
they have the gundam but there's like where they where they they give like some intern like free
reign to do some weird ass graphics still fox yes okay so it must be fox yeah like and uh well i i
was i was making a joke on twitter the other day it's like
you know holding and the gundam just like pulls up to like the player like madden model and just
shoots him the back of the head or something like that uh but yeah like like you know the giant the
giant fucking panther like i i want that in the broadcast today i'm gonna be disappointed if it's
not in there i i that day i just i don't even know what to do with that.
I have to root against the Carolina Panthers,
besides the fact that I'm an Eagles fan,
because Matt Rule, that son of a bitch,
left my beloved Temple Owls the second he could
and went to fucking Baylor And then went on to Carolina.
He's a good coach, but, like, jumped.
You know, you got to get paid.
I get it.
But, like, come on, man.
I, man.
Baylor?
Like, that's the program?
Baylor?
Yeah.
And I think we were talking about before we hit record was the, you know,
Penn State.
It's like, I went to Penn State for two years.
I'm never rooting for Penn State. Fuck Penn State, because
fuck Joppa.
I want to root for Temple.
I do, but why
I'm a Philly
sports fan already.
Why would I do that to myself? They lost
56-3 on Friday.
What was the first
game of the season?
Was it like to Rutgers?
It was like 62-7 or something?
66-14.
66?
I showed that to my students, and they said,
yo, was that like Temple basketball?
I was like, there's no way Temple basketball would lose that bet because they actually have a program, you know.
But yeah.
I wouldn't recommend it.
Wouldn't recommend it wouldn't recommend it no um but yeah i mean it's a rebuild
year for the eagles but like fuck tanking again this is that's gm mindset anyone who's in favor
of tanking like stop stop playing man in franchise mode yeah exactly no you got the point is to win
the game yeah you should you should want to win the game. If I was a player, I would do my best to win.
That Doug Peterson stunt with what's his
what's... Jesus Christ.
Nate Sudfeld. Nate Sudfeld.
Nate the Great.
And that shit. Cut that shit out.
If you build a program
around continued good
scouting and good draft picks,
you don't need to have the top 10 pick
every year you'll be fine pay your players you know play the game you know do your best like
and the only time tanking is ever acceptable because there are there is one specific scenario
is when basically everyone's hurt and you're just like, all right, we're not going to like, we're going to go out there and do our best,
but like, we're also going to toss in like our rookie quarterback,
get him some reps. But like, that wasn't what the Eagles were doing.
They just decided to piss away the game. Yeah. And yeah.
So, and, and, and this whole thing too, cause you, you got this,
you got this quarterback, Jalen Hurts, who I fucking love.
He's smart as hell.
Like you read about how he talks and stuff like that.
And he's young.
Is he 22, 23?
Yeah.
He's incredibly intelligent.
And has leadership abilities way beyond his years.
And he's proof that you do your squats,
good things come to you because he's like unsackable
because he's so fucking strong.
I mean, he squats 600 pounds, which...
They had to limit him at 600 pounds.
Yeah, which, I mean, if you don't know about lifting,
like, hormonally, you know a a guy you know can can easily squat 405
you know anytime before their 50s if they work hard enough like so 600 pounds that's that's pretty
damn strong you know and then uh he's he's dynamic He's fun to watch.
But, oh, here's race in Philly.
Black quarterback syndrome.
The team refuses to basically give him the keys, even though they were happy to with Carson Wentz.
Right. you know speaking of wentz i mean like fuck wentz because of his attitude and his and his whole you
know trump right you know that i don't think he ever said it publicly but he's definitely like
on that train well he he said he said some shit when he was traded to indy about you know the the
the values this place has i feel much more at home here blah blah blah blah yeah i don't you know
the only black people i have to see are my uh are my o-line yeah yeah and um yeah i mean i i i
i was never like a like a wentz wagon guy um he definitely had a good year that was the Super Bowl year. But that clowny hit, that I will die on this hill is what –
like he's never going to be a good quarterback again.
Yeah.
His brain is fried.
And apparently he's like uncoachable and there's a whole bunch of other shit.
But like Jalen Hurts, you know, coachable, likable, smart,
good role model for like kids in the city and stuff like that.
That's what you want.
And a refusal to commit because, hey, maybe we'll get another first-round quarterback.
It's like, how many first – has anyone ever followed the Browns?
How many first-round quarterbacks do you need to see fail in cleveland before you realize that not
every time that that the first round quarterback is not the right choice every time and um
the eagles can't draft for shit i mean no they they basically hit gold uh when fucking andy
reed was here right and haven't in the years since be upon him
peace be upon him and got lucky uh and had breaks go their way had a miraculous carson went season
in 2017 won the super bowl february 18 but since then i mean if you look at the eagles
traffics it's been fucking besides hurts yeah uh it's been just
a nightmare show and like also why draft a guy in the second round if you're not like that's still
a high fucking pick yeah if you're like i i get it if you're like all right it's fucking day three
i guess you need a quarterback yeah go get some dude from like cal state fullerton or something
right you know fuck it roll the dice he's the guy he's the
guy if he's not he's not but like yeah you draft a guy in the second round you're like i don't know
if we're gonna commit to him what is what is that shit like yeah and i mean and it shows that they
they were already thinking about whence not being that they internally knew yeah for sure because
the pick at the time was like oh it lights a fire under his ass like yeah
and and honestly i like i said again i don't he his brain is fried that clowny hit
that man should have been he should have been banned from football that that that is so and and
and who's who's the other fuckhead who does shit like that?
He was on the Tigers for – not Tigers, Bengals for a couple years.
Oh, Vontaze Perfect.
Yeah, yeah.
That kind of shit, like – like you were talking about like the psychopath energy in basketball, but you're not getting CT in basketball.
No.
You're not –
Well, something's gone horribly wrong.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Going headfirst into the stanchion or whatever.
But it's a shame.
And the Eagles, too, are another team that's kind of relying to – this is like the Philly sports curse.
I do actually kind of value that there is a loyalty that the Eagles have to their their guys who been through a lot yeah um i mean they apparently basically chartered a plane this week to bring lane johnson back from oklahoma
yeah for whatever he's going through yeah yeah yeah hopefully that's all you know good but like
uh i i like that um but on the i guess i might tell me if I'm being guilty of doing GM mode brain.
Like, you know, football is a tough – is a physically tough sport.
The average career is three years.
Yep.
And on the one hand, I want to see dudes who got us the Super Bowl getting paid.
You know?
And they deserve it.
You know?
Because, you know, if you make $8 million over three years i mean that's gonna last you rest your life but um you know it's it's hard
to know when to it's hard to know when and i think like that's not really a gmo thing because like
you don't want to you know there are some players who like they're like there are some players who who just defy you know any sense of like normal
like brady obviously right probably will honestly play till he's fucking 50 oh yeah but like no you
you as a it's it's tough because as a fan you're like you you root for these guys obviously you
root for these guys when they were like idiot rookies and then seeing like the eagles d line in their prime
three years ago was so fucking like oh yeah it's amazing to watch as a fan but like you know i i
think you can be a fan and respect that it's still a business right uh but also like if a dude plays
well that dude should get paid yeah you know what i mean like it's it's hard because you know you don't want
to be trotting out a team like the eagles are sort of doing now which is just a bunch of guys who are
who are maybe not washed but certainly beginning their descent at and or at the end of their
careers yeah but i don't think it makes you like a bad fan to understand like oh it's a business like and it's not a
certain it's not an especially pretty one as long as you're not doing the like oh fuck him like he's
washed like you wouldn't have a super bowl if it wasn't for him so like show some goddamn respect
right like like uh you know one of the things that i hate um you know you'd never go to reddit
uh no i remember getting in like a like a 30-page Reddit argument with a guy who's like,
well, you should just draft a running back,
run him until his brain stops working, which is what a lot of teams do.
And then, yeah, you just cut him because there's no guaranteed contracts.
Like the NFL has like the weakest union.
By a mile, yeah.
And it does not have guaranteed contracts unless it's specifically written out
in your contract. So you gotta be pretty, pretty decent.
And you can get cut and not get paid. I don't know what the percentage is,
but I know that it's a very small amount that compared to what your overall
contract is. And that's why every year the Eagles stay under the cap.
Cause they can like fuck around with like bonuses and stuff.
But you know, it's like, dude stuff um but you know it's like dude
this is like a guy's life and it's it's not it doesn't last it's three years like on average
the average nfl career and i'm like this guy's got it like he's going to be brain damaged right
no i'm that well that's what they did that's what the steelers tried to do to fucking uh
when levion
bell was holding out because they were i mean they were putting him in every down and it was
clear that like their intention was basically you're gonna rush 40 times a game every game
uh and we and we at the end of the season we're just gonna trade you or cut you like we don't
give a fuck and it's it's hard to be sympathetic to the team and in in
that sort of circumstance but like because because i mean i'm we're all guilty i'm guilty of gm mode
too because right if it were me you know i i've i die on this hill basically i would draft
a rookie quarterback every four years and i would just pick running backs on the third day and i would just rookie
contract get the rookie contract give them the money and then you just move on and you just move
on and move on uh don't do that if you're an nfl team uh i'm just an asshole yeah well if you do
um fucking give hire me at least yeah oh yeah yeah all of us, please. Give us a give us a give those guys like a golden parachute.
Like, oh, yeah, for sure. If some fucking like asshole, you know, do nothing NBA, you know,
Wartner or Fox, just piece of shit, you know, can go to a company, rate it, you know, sell off everything and, you
know, live out the rest of his life, you know, in relative ease than some, some guy who's
actually worked, you know, Oh, it's just a kid's game.
It's just sports.
Oh, it's Danny's guys.
You know, it's just 12 hours a day, every day for like 20 years.
It's physically grueling job.
Every sport is physically grueling and it takes a ton of work to get to that level of
proficiency it is you know it they make it look easy it was like that dude like um oh yeah i could
probably hit a hit a home run in a major no you couldn't so no you couldn't maybe if you were if
you had a year of coaching right maybe you could hit a home run off of a position player who's who's in the you know like
a 14 nothing blowout right maybe you know but no you you wouldn't you would not be able to you
would see a slider and they would just throw sliders and you would strike out because you
don't know how to tell a slider from a fastball i i i have said it's like one of the things that
i think people don't understand this is just sort of like a an opinion is that like when you get to
the nfl the big dudes who weigh like 385 and are like six six are still running like 4840s oh yeah
like they're everyone in the nfl is the fastest person you've ever seen absolutely absolutely
like people are just like oh i could do better i better. I'm like, nah, like, no. Like, my buddy who played minor league ball didn't make it up that high.
He's the strongest, fastest person I know.
Like, just from sheer merit that he was a professional athlete.
And that's how he grew up his entire life, being a professional athlete.
And it's like, I'm like a strong guy, but I'm not that strong.
Like, I'm just a fucking asshole um and and and these guys yeah
it is a physically demanding uh and and like i said that's why i kind of feel bad about football
you know if i end up having kids i probably wouldn't let them play despite my love of the
sport uh same honestly and i and i played the sport. Yeah. But let's real quick talk about – we talked about Howie.
We talked about draft position.
Why don't we – we're at an hour anyway.
Why don't we wrap up with the Flyers who suck, who are going to suck this year,
who left their second-year goalie out there to die last year,
a kid named Carter Hart hart who is special but
needs some help uh but let's talk about the the robin linder accusation so uh vegas which has a
hockey team for some reason yeah uh accused uh alan vigneault and the flyers organization of
basically pushing pills to players specifically benzos and i think ambient
yeah that's awesome i have no reason to fucking not believe robin lennar yeah like i will say
that i i honestly believe that like based on what we know about like like i'll give you an example so yesterday i was watching
texas a&m and alabama and uh a&m's quarterback throws this beauty to the right sideline
and a dt lands on his legs and he like struggles to get up has to be helped off the field like he's visibly barely walking and he's in
the next series like they are shooting them up with like oh yeah like cocktails basically yeah
like and you're fucking delusional if you think that that's not happening what goes in that what
goes in the concussion protocol tent stays in the concussion protocol yeah it's it's they are
like you remember a few years ago when rogers
got hurt uh during that bears game and he came back and he was visibly like high as a kite yeah
yeah like got got my man some vivans going on yeah there's no reason to believe the teams are
not doing this yeah yeah uh yeah so so i had i had to look this up because I
have not watched hockey
since the Lindros era.
And my mom
wouldn't let me get a Lindros jersey because she said
88's a Nazi number, so you're not getting it.
I was like, okay. Good mom.
But yeah,
this doesn't surprise me
one bit that you would
chemically enhance your dudes if they're not like think about it.
Like, yeah. All right. We give guys some speed, you know, give them some Adderall or whatever.
And then, hey, what you need to fall asleep, take some Ambien, you know, that that doesn't surprise me at all.
One thing I did see, I was looking up like opinions on this because I'm out of hockey.
I don't I don't know hockey't know hockey and that will be like
the question is should I get back into hockey
but
the
I saw some real ableist shit
because Robin, how do you say it?
Lerner? Lerner
I've been saying Lerner, it could be something else, I don't care
he's got like
bipolar or something like that
he's been very public about it.
Yeah, which is good.
You know, like mental health.
Hey, I'm a special ed teacher.
I'm big on mental health awareness.
And people were like, well, you can't trust him.
He's like bipolar.
It's like, what the fuck?
What does that even fucking mean?
It doesn't mean anything.
What does that even fucking mean?
I don't trust him him he was born without an
arm it's it's literally the saying the same thing um you know uh so yeah so my my angle there is
like like if you're if that is your like go-to take like i'm not gonna believe this guy because
he's got a mental illness that he's like publicly, you know, uh, open about like, fuck you. Like you're an asshole. You should be,
you should really feel bad. Um, but yeah, no, I'm, uh,
what did I say? Like he's, is he on that, uh, Jordan Peterson Benzo shit?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You don't want to Benzo out your players, man.
Cause that's not good. You're gonna have to be put on the goalie, man.
That's if anyone needs to be mentally sharp on your team,
man,
it's,
it's like,
yeah,
but there,
there is no way that like Adderall or whatever is not freely available in
like every sport.
No,
there's no way.
There's no,
exactly.
It's so easy.
It's,
I mean,
it's a schedule two drug,
but it's easy, easy enough to get. And it's,
it's out of your system real quick and it, it, it, it low doses.
It doesn't, it all does is benefit you. Like it doesn't like,
it's like all the research around ADHD. It's like, yeah, no,
you can do low doses of meth for the rest of your life and you'll be probably
fine. But yeah. And then then so i um yeah so so my my hockey knowledge is is
is poor so does that mean do i have to start watching hockey again oh for this yes you
actually do yeah yeah sorry about it yeah yeah it's all right and and and that's because the
flyers suck apparently yeah the flyers are garbage uh weren't they good like two years ago though
yeah they're all right uh but uh that's not going to be the case anymore.
Unless Carter Hart can rebound and they can actually get scoring.
But they're not going to do that.
I'm not getting the calf tattoo, though.
No, you don't need to do that.
I'm not from Delco.
No, you can do your whole life without that.
Yeah, yeah yeah yeah
and yeah this is like the pete's clown house reference when uh where's your problem i got
food poisoning there twice all right so you really were there yeah and i've been there twice
oh my god isn't that place a shithole yeah i i've the food was good i just happened to also
get food poisoning i have i'm obligated to defend it because it's literally right by North.
It's right there.
Right.
Yeah.
So like, yeah, but it is a total shithole.
You want to know how I know you and I have been talking too much?
What's up?
I got a Facebook recommendation for like an event to join.
That was Falcon, Red, White, and Brood, which which is like go to all these bars in philly
that are run by north alum oh and i was just like i i need my designated north buddy
if i do this oh i i would do it oh definitely we'd probably get in fight fight. Yeah, that's fine. That's fine.
But yeah.
Yeah, I don't know how many Blue Lives Matter signs you can tolerate. North
isn't as bad as Judge.
Oh, fucking hell. Well, Judge alums can't read.
Yeah, Judge can't read. Sorry about that.
Judge grads, if you are mad
about it. If you can listen to this, even.
Yeah, you can listen to this. When you're done doing
cave paintings.
Yeah. Yeah. uh time you i think i made this joke before like like literally like hitting their head against the wall like with their football helmet on to prove
how tough they were to their coach yeah it's a it's a it's a i don't know how true it is but
that's what we heard growing up that's a judge right of passage yeah yeah because you got it
you can't you can't have an iq over you know 90 if you want to be a cop and you know
that's the family tradition all judge guys are cops oh man except for the one judge god i knew
who i actually liked very much and worked with me at the liquor store uh all right we are at an hour
and five yeah we've done it uh we've got our judge shots in yeah uh i've been liam that's been tom uh
we are gonna try to do this i guess regularly we'll probably have to talk about that
yeah uh but thank you for tuning in uh go birds uh yeah all right see you next time folks
all right see you then