That Gaby Roslin Podcast: Reasons To Be Joyful - Alistair McGowan

Episode Date: July 4, 2022

Gaby's guest in this episode is the endlessly talented Alistair McGowan. He is renowned as being one of the best impressionists the UK has ever produced and has worked extensively in television and theatre. He can be found touring the country in his show which has a mix of comedy, impressions and his beautiful piano playing. Stay tuned for a multitude of brilliant impressions throughout this episode. This is the season 2 finale, but fear not! Gaby will be back after the summer with season 3, filled with more fantastic guests! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome to that Gabby Rosin podcast, part of the A-Cast Creator Network. Alastair MacGowen is my guest this week. He is one of the best impressionists in this country, and he is a wonderful man. He can be found touring the country doing his piano show, which is a glorious mix of comedy, impressions and beautiful piano playing. Even though he is one of my dearest friends, I learned a lot of new things during our chat. And yes, of course, he does a multitude of brilliant impressions during this episode. Please can I ask you a favour? Would you mind following and subscribing, please, by clicking the follow or subscribe button.

This is completely and utterly free, by the way. And you can also rate and review on Apple Podcasts, which is the purple app on your iPhone or iPad. Simply scroll down to the bottom of all of the episodes. I know there have been quite a few now. And you'll see the stars where you can tap and rate and also please write a review. Thank you so much. Is this like Louis Theroux's podcast? Are you recording this bit? We're recording every bit. Because they do that. Have you heard Louise?

That's what Louis does. He sort of records people when they're not expecting it. So you get this sort of false start. You do that as well? We do it. No. I didn't know that. I thought you'd just start in a big showbiz way and go, here I am.

I'm talking to it. I can't do impressions though. Well, it's lucky you can't because I know somebody who can. Oh, really? Yeah. I know Sir and Alistair McGowan, who's one of my dear. most beautiful friends, the man I trust with anything and everything. There we go.

Alistair, do you know what so amazing is that in my head I thought, I know he'll start with an impression. No, you didn't think that. I did, of course. I listen, how well do we know each other? And I tried to work out which one it would be and guess who I thought you'd go with? Louis Thoreau. No.

Richard Madele. Yes. Do you know that's people's most popular from the TV thing. I mean, it was 20 years ago now we did the TV thing. thing. And yet it's something that's never really worked since then. It's really odd. I still do live work in case people wondering what I do these days. But when I do my live shows, part of the fun with that was, and I've got to do it to illustrate it, but part of the fun was Ronnie alongside me, which is true of a lot of the sketches, actually. People often, you know,

well, I don't think they do forget that because, well, she doesn't let them. But no, no, no, seriously. But it was the reaction of Jude to Richard. And that's what our sketches were so much about, really was the two of us and the way that one would react to the other and the comedy of silence frequently you know for that reaction which is what I loved about doing that show so long ago it can't be 20 years ago it can be 20 years ago I know it's extraordinary but it is yeah we were watching something on UK Gold or Dave the other night and it was all about it was comedians watching comedy shows and they were talking and there was David Badeel, Sarah Hadland, Richard Herring, gosh, so many people, so many people on it.

And they were talking about impersonators, impressionists. And they were saying, it's not done anymore. And the only person that they could all quote was you. Oh, well, that's nice. Apart from Alastair McGowan, Alastair McGowan. And I sat there with my kids cheering. Yes, yes. The thing is, if I'm allowed to.

to mention other podcasts, but there's a fellow called Simon Lipson, who I worked with back in the early 90s, I mean, really late 80s, early 90s, we started out together on the circuit, and Simon did a few good impressions and still does. But he, during lockdown, has done a whole thing with every impression that you can imagine talking about the art of the impression. And there are people, he's got us doing sketches. I've done three or even four, I think of them. And if people want another podcast to listen to, check out Simon Lipsons, because it's all about the art of impressions and he introduces you to a whole sway and me introduced me to a sway of new impressionist who I'd never really heard of who are really really strong but you're

right they don't get that break on TV anymore and I don't know if they can because um well I think you know television has got so fractured now people watch it in so many different ways um that I find it even on stage you know doing my life stuff which I haven't done really really for 18 months obviously for obvious reasons, but one of my favourite voices to do these days is George Clark from George Clark's amazing spaces. But I found doing that a lot of people didn't know who George was. And George has done 10 series of Restoration Man, you know, Best Shed and all that stuff. And people just don't know who he is.

And that's Channel 4. Thank you very much, one of my favourites. With my audience, you know, you just have to choose the right people for the right audience. And one person that I very much enjoy doing at the moment is Michael Moody, the BBC's Doctor-in-Chief who tries doing all sorts of things on our behalf to see if they're good or not for our bodies. And he is somebody that resonates with my audience, as does. I'm doing loads of impressions now. Who'd have thought that would have. No, but that was brilliant. Actually, that was really scarily good. I interviewed him the other day. And that was so like him. He's a lovely man

and I think he's a very, very good broadcaster. But again, you know, you think his programs probably get three million viewers, which when we were doing our show 20 years ago, my producer would say, if it doesn't get more than six million, we can't do them. Now, now, that's all change but that's why impressionist shows I think are very hard because you think you know one that one of the people who I watch and have started watching every week since moving out of London to the countryside and having a garden is Monty Donne. Now Monty again has been on for years and years and years doing gardeners world very popular goes well live but how many people actually watched gardeners world you know you think everyone does I do because all my the people I know

now in this rural iddle where I live or watch gardens well but do them in London people go watch that program Gabby can I pause and just go and answer the door yeah of course you can of course you can now Louis would include all that the footsteps coming back the conversation at the door you're not going to do it no of course we are and also I love the fact that you're now in this

huge country place that obviously if I were to answer the front door it would take me about 20 seconds from to where I'm sitting it took you a long time to get I can't wait to see this place. My goodness. Well, it's the postman as well, you know. The day we moved in here. I mean, it was extraordinary.

The postman introduced himself and said, I'm your local postman. Dave, I've been delivering letters around here for 30 years, born and bred. Anything you want to know about the area? So nice to have you here. Welcome to the area. And he's been so lovely. And recently I did back on stage for the first time, I did my new piano show, which I'm sure I'll talk about shortly. But I hadn't performed for 18 months.

And his wife was a pianist, so I invited them to come to the house. to listen to a run-through in my sort of piano room. And I did three run-throughs with four neighbours, obeying the rule of six with me and my wife. And it was fantastic just to sit in this room in the new house and it was like an old-fashioned piano salon, which is actually how a lot of piano music was initially played, was in tiny salons, and, you know, List and Chopin would play to their friends

and all played to people who'd been invited by a very wealthy friend of theirs to a small gathering. So it felt really special. But, yeah, Dave, the Postman, we repaid his friendship. I love that. Yeah, yeah, he's great. He actually told me to go on a cycle ride the first time I was here. He said, you want to go up that hill there, Alistair?

It's quite testing for the first, well, I don't know, it's about two miles uphill up there. It's a long way up to Wingmore. So I thought, oh, I'll give it a go. So I started off on this cycle ride. The first week I was here. I thought, right, here we go. And it was 200 metres up, up this hill.

It's really killing. And then it flattens off. And I thought, oh, typical driver. Doesn't know how big a hill is. And then, of course, you turn the corner, and he was right, it's too much. miles of this killing hill, which is actually called Kill Horse Lane, because that's probably what it did to the horses. Well, I was on a bike, so the bike survived, and I survived, but over the

years, I think a few horses have copped it on that hill. Oh, dear. Anyway, there you go. No good knowledge. Oh, no, that's a jolly thought to think of. Thank you for that. I think we won't be walking up that hill when we come and see you. But back to why impressions now are no longer thought of. It's funny because everybody does them. So my 14 year old, who you know, and she loves to do, not, she wouldn't call it an impression, but she does voices. And I did voices when I was growing up and I could do, I could do a voice. So people don't think of them as impressions. Now, you see many shows and people will do an accent or do a voice. And I know obviously you have to be very careful these days because you don't

want to upset anybody because doing, you're not, you're not taking the pierce out as a somebody, you're just catching their vowel sounds or their mannerisms. But it's interesting that people don't necessarily call it impressions. Because when I said to, oh, she does a newsreader. And I said, oh, that's a brilliant impression. She said, well, it's not really an impression. I'm just doing her voice. So it's funny how they think of it.

It's different. Yeah, maybe it's just a term again after, well, I mean, Deadringers was on after us on television, but I suppose that hasn't been on now. John Colcher and Deborah Stevenson did their show. That finished about eight to nine years ago. So yeah, maybe impressions is not a word that's around much at the moment. I had a very interesting chat with David Soucher once years ago when I was working at the Royal Shakespeare Company

and David Soushake came for the first night. And he called me afterwards and he said, I've always wanted, I can't do his voice, but he said, I've always wanted to know the difference between an impression and an impersonation. What do you think it is? And he gave me this fantastic answer, which if I can remember, because people will always say, are you impersonate or are you an impressionist? what's the difference? And I didn't know. But David Soucher said an impression, as with the

impressionist art movement, I suppose, my knowledge of art is very poor. But, you know, it wasn't meant to look exactly like the thing. It was an impression. It was something which is exaggerated or in the area of. But an impersonation, he said, means sound going through you, persona, meaning the sound going through you. So an impersonation, he said by definition, linguistically, etymologically, I think that's the right word, unless that's to do with ants, means, and that's entomologically, impersonation means the sound going through you. So it should, by definition, be more accurate

if we're picking, splitting heads. Well, that's interesting. I mean, I always go on about, you know, we didn't put it out there. We've very, very close friends and have been for years. And I remember coming to see you doing a play. It was the most difficult thing I've ever watched. It was about...

It was cabaret where I... No. No. I think I know what you go. No, this was about Jimmy Saville. And it was an extraordinary performance. And I cried, as you well know at the end, my heart broke for all of his victims.

But it also, I cried because I never realized what a fine actor you were. and I felt I'd never looked at your, looked you in the eye and said that to you. But what you did and what you do when you're acting is you completely, that person, you become that person. You're not Alastair McGowan.

You're not an impersonator or an impressionist. You become that person. And I think that's so with other things I've seen you do on stage and I've seen you do many things. And on television, Obviously, you had your own series that you wrote as a cop, as a policeman. But all of that... I wrote bits of that.

I wrote bits of that. All right, bits of it. So you wrote it, yeah. I'll stand by that. But that you encompass those people. So maybe... I'm just sort of going back to what David Soucher said, is that you become those people.

You're not doing a voice. You become those people. Well, it's interesting, you know, I think a large part of it. Well, actually, I had a conversation recently with a wonderful impressionist who's sort of my age called Cato Sullivan. And she's terrific. And we were just talking about how you maybe get to a stage in life as an impressionist, I suppose, if that's what I am, where it becomes somehow less appealing because you have a greater sense of who you are yourself. And for a long time, you know, you want to be somebody else.

I remember doing the tele-show and absolutely loving putting on a mic up in a week and being Jonathan was. Now, Jonathan is somebody I've always, you know, admired hugely ever since I was watching television before I was even doing impressions back in the late 80s when he did the last resort. And suddenly, Jonathan developed this real wit, you know, and has had it ever since. But when I was stressed up with Jonathan all day long, somehow looking in the memoir, you know, I wasn't, I mentioned David Soucho. He used to be Poirot all day apparently when he had the makeup home. He would become paro and stay in Poirot all day. But sometimes with the characters you put the makeup on, or I did 20 years ago and Ronnie, and you'd do them a little bit, but you wouldn't sustain it all the time.

But with Jonathan somehow I'd do, I don't know why, but it was a great sense of power and a quite sense of wishful film, which is the point on Twon of Mike, that I loved being Jonathan because I was suddenly really funny, and I had status, and everything I said seemed to turn to gold or to be nice, or to be witty, or to be warm. And so that was a sort of a wishful film, and as I said, in me, that I wanted to be like Jonathan. And even when I did Gary Lineck, I'm there, I'm really enjoying doing Gary because something made me feel very in touch with my sporting side, even though he was only talking.

He wasn't actually playing the game for ever and a sake. But I just loved it. You think, oh, God, I'm now this person. I'm now that person. This is great. Is that Shines? Is that covering the shyness? Yeah, I think a large number of impressionists.

I mean, you've talked to a lot of actors in your career and certainly on your podcast, and you know that sometimes actors can be very hard to talk to because they're shape-shifters. and they like to be somebody else and they're not that happy talking about themselves. And I think most impressionists are that times five. You know, and by dint of the number of people they do, they're that times 100 or 200 if you like. But yeah, you're always thinking,

what would it be like to be them? What would it be like to be them? If you're really doing it, otherwise, as you said, you are just doing the voice, which is slightly different. And I think to, yeah, do an accurate impersonation, impression, whatever you want to call it, you do need to sort of become them. That was one of the challenge with Saville, really.

sort of working out how far to go. Unfortunately, when doing that role, I mean, that was what, 2015 or something, we did that. The whole issue was pretty hot off the press. So it was a hot topic. And it was disturbing reading about him. But in the play, for those millions who didn't see it, I'd never had to reenact anything he did that was particularly,

well, that was horrible in any way. All we saw was me playing him denying everything. or being on stage, being the showman. And, you know, he was this, and that was the only thing I could latch onto to play him, was his showmanship, and he was an incredible showman, which is why he was so successful professionally. And then, well, the rest we know.

And how he pulled the wool over it. Oh, it's just so shocking. And it is, that plays, it is one of the most shocking things I've ever seen. I'm thinking of it now. My skin crawled. But you were, so which came first then? The impressions or the acting, because you trained as an actor

and you can sing, you can play the piano beautifully, we'll talk about the piano, we will talk about the piano, of course. But which came first? Were you the child who did the teacher's voices at school, or were you the child that wanted to be on stage? I was actually neither. I was the child who wanted to be a journalist and write about football. And then I had a very good drama teacher who just said,

you know, you're good in the drama class. Why don't you do some acting? And I never thought of doing it professionally, really, until I was in my late teens, by which time I'd gone to university to study English with the idea of becoming a journalist and writing about football. So the acting, I suppose, came first. And then, yeah, the impressions, I always did a few,

but I never thought it was anything extraordinary because my mum used to do them and my sister used to do them. My dad was awful. But my mum and sister were terrific. And in fact, during the TV series, they were my best critics. You know, if I ever tried a voice out, it would be on either of them.

And my sister particularly would say, you know, it's a bit more like this and a bit less like that. And even now, the most recent one I did that I asked her help with, was where 10 years ago was John Bishop, because I didn't really know John that well, but he was big on telly.

And my sister, she absolutely adored John Bishop. And she'd been to see him live a couple of times, once at Edinburgh and once in Wales. And she was the one who said, no, no, no, he goes up and down. And he repeats himself. He repeats himself several times before you get to the point and at the end of the sentence she said you always just sort of

die in a way thing where you can't always hear what he's saying and she just taught me the whole thing she taught me the whole thing and so that that was really really helpful but he was somebody I didn't really know that well and you know you do generally need to know the people you do very well and as to say that wish fulfillment thing is frequently very useful but which came first yeah I suppose the acting and then the impressions really to answer the question um were were a way of getting my equity card because back in the late 80s when I was leaving drama school, you had to join equity and to join equity you had to have had a certain number of paid contracts and you could get these contracts either in those days by entertaining old people

stripping or by doing stand-up comedy. So, obviously the stripping didn't work too well, made up for it in Cabaret in 2008 in the West End. But yeah, so I thought, well, I'll just try the comedy and I'd been to the comedy store a couple of times by default really. I was so excited and just did everything I could in London when I was first in London went to the comedy store and I'd seen Phil Cornwell down there who was the impressionist at the time on the circuit and you know I just thought well I'd like to have a crack at that so I just started doing a few and I thought I'll just do my eight contracts which is all you needed to get and then I'll give it up and I'll join the Royal Shakespeare Company and become the

next Roger Reese who is my sort of acting hero at the time. He died a couple of years ago Roger but yeah it just took off it just took off and I just loved it I absolutely loved it from the word go. But loving stand-up, so the thing about stand-up, and every time we speak to, and we've spoken to everyone from Rob Beckett and Rob Bryden and Lee Mack and... It's taking you this long to come to me. No, not at all. But all of these people who do stand up, the thing I don't get, and I'm, and I talk about

it on the podcast, I'm very open about the fact I'm unbelievably shy, but put me in front of a live TV show or live radio and I can talk to anyone. But the idea of doing stand-up, comedy, Phil makes my stomach just in knots, the idea of it because you get, if it doesn't work, it really doesn't work. And that's why so many comedians have that, oh gosh, painted on smile sounds very sort of old-fashioned. But I do think that. You sell your jokes, yeah. People say that all the time. And obviously, it's not easy, and you learn from your mistakes,

and you've got to make some big mistakes early on to learn from them. I remember seeing Mark Lamar a lot when I was younger, starting out in late 80s. And Mark used to die every other show. And then he suddenly developed through that, the ability to talk to the audience and to turn around any given situation. And he would wrestle with the audience like it was a crocodile, and he would just get them to love him after a while.

It was extraordinary. But he had to fail to do. that. And I had some spectacular failings early on, a couple. Not that many, I suppose, really. But the thing I always say to people who say it's really hard, especially actors, is it's actually easier than acting, much easier than acting. Yes. Being in a play, well, I had a friend who is an actor and a director, and in fact, directed the Saville play brilliantly, Brendan O'Haye. And Brendan wanted to do some stand-up for a while. He'd done some stuff at the globe where he talked to the audience in Henry V, I think. And he said, I'd love to do some stuff. And he'd love to do some

stand up. Can you teach me? Can you teach me? So I said, well, look, we'll book you some gigs in and let's get it done. So over six months period, he waited for his gig and he wrote his material. I said, I can't write the stuff for you. You must write your own material. So he did that. And I helped him with a little tiny bit, but not much. But then it was all about the delivery. And we learned and learned and learned and practiced. And then the day before his first gig, I said, how are you feeling it? He said, I'm so nervous. I'm so nervous. What are you nervous about? He said, I'm nervous of going wrong. And I said, Brendan, in stand up, there is no wrong. There are only different degrees of right.

And he said, that's brilliant. What do you mean by that? And I said, I mean that you are the person who's written this. So you're the only person who knows if it's gone wrong. And if it's gone wrong, you don't admit it. You just get out of it by doing something different. Now, if you're in a play and you go wrong, you know, there are six other actors on the stage potentially with you,

looking at you thinking, where the hell have you gone? You've skipped a page or you've gone to a different play or whatever else or your entrance is late. And you've let them all down and everyone's got to decide amongst you who's going to pick it up, who's going to go where, who's going to readjust, who's going to think, oh yes, okay, we've gone back to that bit, right, on we go. It's even worse in a musical where when I did my first musical, I forgot the opening lines of my song, it was at the Royal Shakespeare Theatre, and I was so moved to be on stage

after years of going there with my mother and she was in the audience. I just thought, I can't believe I'm on this stage. And suddenly the band were playing. I was thinking, I'm supposed to be singing, and I couldn't remember my song. And, of course, the band don't stop. The band can't all go, oh, where is he? Let's wait for him to catch up. you've just suddenly not got to remember your line,

you've got to remember where they are now in the song and then jump in like a skipping rope game. So I would say musicals are the hardest. Acting as next hardest, and stand-up is far, far easier than that. Yes, but I'm still going to come back to you about that because, yes, I'm lucky enough to have done musical, I'm lucky enough to have been in some plays.

And yes, yes, the responsibility to your fellow performers and obviously to the audience, but still that maybe hopefully they'll help you out as well but still you're standing on stage on your own and you you were waiting for that gag each gag to get the laughter and if you don't get the laughter

doesn't that just inside doesn't don't you just disappear inside yourself and think oh my goodness this hasn't worked and then this one hasn't got a laugh and now where do I go yeah Sean Locke when I used to do loads of stand up with Sean at the comedy store. He was a very good sort of analyzer of comedy. He passed on little tips.

And he said, you're only three gags away from getting booed off. And you'd go, what? Yeah, you're free gags away from getting booed off. No matter how far you were into your set and how well you'd done. If you did one that didn't work, they go, oh, that didn't work. Oh, that's two. Oh, we thought this guy was quite good. But now he's suddenly not very good.

And you did three that don't work. And I go, oh, for 19 minutes. This guy was really funny. But now, get off. And you think it is extraordinary. They say football managers are six games away from the sack, and comics are three gags away from being booed off, according to Shaw not. But there is some truth in that.

But then you work out over the years strategies to get out of it, or you think, oh, I'll skip that gag I was going to do. I'll go to that one because that always slays them. Or you think this is just a quiet audience. They're smiling, I hope. And you do that thing, yes, the Richter's grin, or you start laughing at things. Or you just, which is something we learned from you and Chris Evans actually on a big breakfast.

I think a lot of stand-ups probably did. that I think you and Chris were the first people on there to acknowledge on television and live television if something had gone wrong. Everybody else always trying to cover, you know, the Frank Boffs of this world or whoever else. There was nothing, nothing went wrong there. Don't worry, nothing went wrong.

They would just carry on. But you and Chris would actually draw attention to it and go, oh, we've lost our link. Oh, well, that didn't go so well. Oh, okay, let's try and get him back. And I think, certainly for me, watching you and Chris was a lesson in just acknowledge that something hasn't worked

and then move on, because then they'll laugh with you. But again, going back to Sean Locke's point, you can only play that card twice. Yeah, I mean, everybody always says that for the amount of time I've done TV and radio. When somebody interviews me and they say, oh, tell us about when those embarrassing moments of things go wrong. I said, well, I can't because they go wrong all the time and I tell everybody. But that's still not the same as the laugh thing. I suppose I'm in all of the fact of what you do.

So I've seen you with my husband. We've come to see you in small venues. We've come to see you in big venues. But it never doesn't work. It's as if you read the audience before. I mean, how do you know the audience before you go out there? So I've been to see many comedians and I've seen some not do as well. And I've seen some do incredibly brilliantly like you.

but it's the ones that know their audience. And I'd say that you know your audience, whether it's for your piano recital, where you do impressions and comedy as well, or whether it's just you doing your impressions and comedy, or whatever it is, you know your audience. Do you, is that, is it, is it geographical? Is it because you can feel it?

A bit of both. there's a lot of preparation goes on and I'm meticulous and there are people like Mark Lamar I mentioned from years ago and there's plenty more obviously nowadays who are very happy to work off the audience

and let the gig just happen I can't do that I have to know exactly what I'm going to do and pretty much stick to that that's my acting background there's a script in my head and I don't really vary from that very much but I do change it

but it's planned before each audience so yes if I'm in certainly with the football voices that's always very interesting that if I go to Newcastle for instance sports voices. Slightly different now because he's retired.

But I used to do an impression of Brendan Foster when Brendan was the BBC's main athletics commentator and people would know Brendan's voice because he'd been on for decades, you know, and I'd do him around the country

and it was a good impression and a good gag and people would laugh. But if I was in the Kassar and I started to do Brendan, I could do him for five minutes and not even get to a joke and people would just laugh at their voice. And you suddenly realize that and similarly down in the south

in the West country, and there's a football manager called Ian Holloway and Ian used to manage like QPR and the Eastern manager I was going to say Crystal Palace Blackpool, did the manage Blackpool Grimsby was the last club

and it's not a brilliant impression but just the fact that I did him in the West Country it would go through the roof because it was somebody doing a Bristol accent and in that area so there is a geographical thing you think oh I'll do him here

I'll do them there that will work well do many more Scots people if I'm in Scotland you know even do my dreadful Ken Bruce which is nothing on Rob Brydon's I'm sure partly because I don't really listen to radio too

it's a complete phony that one. But, you know, you throw that one in in Scotland. But I think there's also with comedians, maybe, this is probably controversial. I don't get very controversial. But I think there are some comics who just do their act and they say, come to me. This is me. And I was talking to another comic about this from my generation recently. We talked about it as therapy comedy where there's a lot of people now who want to talk

about themselves and their background and their issues and everything else. And if you can't change that when you're, because that's you, talking about you, some people don't want to hear about that. is my attitude and a lot of people in, well, no, not all of them in my generation, but other people, they go to the audience and they say, what's going to make you laugh? How do I make you laugh? And it's not a question of you come to me, it's I'll come to you. And that seems to have fallen out of favour a little bit. And if you think about the generation before me, you know, the monk houses and all those people, that was all about, you know, here's a gag for you.

This is going to make you laugh. It was nothing about them. You didn't learn anything about them. So my generation, I suppose, the Bonalton generation, if you want, were more. confessional but the present generation it's almost as I say therapy therapy that's very interesting and you can't bend that you can't be somebody else if you're performing in front of businessman at the Grovener you know and then the next minute you're performing at the Arcola Theatre in Hackney it's gonna be a very different audience whereas if you're just trying to make people laugh but I'm not saying that I can do that everywhere because I can't and I know now that if I went

to the comedy store with my probably accent and age and references people would stare blankly at me doing my impression of Monti Don or whoever it might be, even me doing my Chris Pack and I can only do one word of Chris Pack at the moment, which is fast. But if I just did my impression of Chris Packen going, fast, they'd probably say who's Chris Pack and what's BBC 2? What's Springwatch?

You know, but my audience, they go, oh, how hilarious. You can only do one word of him, but we know who he is because we watch Spring Watch and we live near a fast. That's very good. What is success to you then? Happiness. Simple as that.

Always has been, really, I think. the striving for personal happiness. I know I, in fact, I hear myself, I would sound quite grumpy. And people are always quite surprised because I'm quite cynical and I don't go out dancing or drinking or anything like that. But I just have a sort of contentment. And I think, you know, being content and being able to be kind to people is, that's success for me.

And it always was, you know, and my mother, bless her, you know, she was a great driver for me. She was really more ambitious for me than I was in many ways. Not that I was a helicopter, I don't think they existed in those days. Combine Harvester, parent, perhaps they were in those days. But no, she always, you know, wanted me to go further and further and this will be success and that'll be success. And for me, it was always doing a good job and being able to just be content and be nice to people is, that's, that's success for me.

And I think people measure success in so many different ways, don't they, you know, have you got a car? Have you got children? Have you got this? Have you got that? And I've never been that, really. No, you haven't. I have to say, you're very. say you're possibly one of the kindest people that I know because it comes from somewhere very, very deep inside you. I mean, I always remind you of something you said to me years ago where it was, you know, you see a bee and you will always be very careful and which we should all do. Let's be honest, but very carefully make sure that the bee is okay and you look at the bee

and you appreciate the bee and you make sure that the bee is going to be safe and nobody's going to tread on it or no cars. going to drive over it. And you love, it's those moments of pure beauty that it's just a note in a piece of music that you will, you will suddenly make me hear a note in a piece of music that I would have just said, well, that's a note of many other notes that brought about that nice chord. And you'll say, no, no, no, just listen to where that note takes you. And it's because you have, you've always given time to people, but you have,

an innate kindness. You want everybody also to appreciate that bumblebee, to appreciate that beautiful fruit, to appreciate that note. And that comes from very deep inside you. Yeah, yeah. You're moving me now. I'm embarrassed you.

Yes. It does, I suppose. And I don't know, is it parenting or is it genetics? But, you know, my father was, he wasn't brought up in this country. And he wasn't a religious person exactly, but he, as we found out through, who do you think you are, which was an amazing experience. That was so incredible to watch. Yeah.

So he was brought up in India of Anglo-Indian parents to whom he never, to which he never really confessed to me. He said it was all a shock. I just thought that they happened to be in India when he was born. But it was quite a Christian community. And even though he wasn't brought up, you know, going to church and God-fearing and certainly never instilled that into me, he was, I think, the most Christian person I've ever met in the fact, well, met, do you meet your father, that I knew. And one of the things that he said to me, which was just fantastic, was always treat people as you would want to be treated. So true. So true.

Okay, there we go. And, you know, the other thing he taught me, which is one of the many reasons I don't even pay any attention to Twitter. So what I'm saying is probably a huge generalisation. But he said, it's a cliche, it's a proverb. You know, you can please some of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time. And if you know that, you don't even need to look at Twitter or go on Twitter or post anything on Twitter ever. That is the whole thing you need to know about life. You can please some of the people some of the time,

but you'll never please all the people all the time. Stop trying. You know, you will save yourself a lot of stress and I think be a lot happier if you're not trying to do that all the time and just accept it. And that was borne out when we did our first TV show. It was weird, actually, and gave me a fairly balanced idea of that.

because the very first review we had, I think, was in The Express and the Mail, picked it out, the first show we did, a pilot. And this is, what, 1999? And the Mail, I think, said something like, very interesting, very good show, a lot of sketches, much more hit than miss, deserves to get a series, if only for the excellent Elvis Costello, which both looks and sounds like the great man himself. And the other one, the Express said, more hit than miss, deserves to get a series, some very good writing here. The only thing that fails is the Elvis Costello song, which is... the looks nor sounds nothing like the man himself. Yeah, and you go, there's two people who clearly are both fans of Elvis Costello because they knew who he was.

And one said, that's exactly him. And the other one said, that's nothing like him. And I thought, there you go. We're not going to please everybody here. We've always got to just know that we did our best. And that's the other thing my father told me, always do your best. And if you do that, you know, you don't need to know what the reviews say. You think, well, I did my best.

So onto you and your piano, because this has become a deep love of yours. Yeah. And this came at an older age. I'm not going to use the word old because I hate it. And actually, the other thing is that I really do hate. And I don't hate many things, but I hate it when people say, ooh, aren't you good for your age? Oh, you look good for your age.

Oh, look at you at your age. So I'm going to actually take all of that back. What I'm going to say is that it wasn't something that you did at the earlier part of your life. There we go. But you found piano. Yes, I don't mind you talking about age. You know, if Anthony Hopkins, came in a Oscar, the age of 83,

I think there's hope for us all if you want to. See him on Instagram. He's hysterical. Well, absolutely. You know, age is no barrier. No barrier to anything at all. Ms. Rossin, you can do whatever you want, whatever age you are.

Absolutely wonderful. Thank you, Anthony. That's fine. It's my favourite impression. It doesn't work. It's too gentle. It doesn't work alive. Anyway, yes, I started playing the piano properly when I was 49,

and I'd always wanted to do it. And I just absolutely. adore it. I have to hold myself back from doing too much because I have. You would never think you can get injuries from playing the piano, but of course you can. And I've injured my shoulders and my back and my knee and my foot and lots of fingers and thumbs as well over the last six or seven years periodically. So I have to limit it now to about three hours a day on and off. Three hours a day? Yeah, I would do more. I was doing six. Well, your professionals, your proper pianists, which I am not, and I always stress that, they would have done.

anything up to my old teacher used to say six hours a day average, which means some days, eight hours a day, if they've got a concert coming up. And my present teacher says, you know, if I play too much, it's mad. She says, you know, you haven't done it since you were a youngster, the muscles aren't developed. So you can play that amount of time and not damage yourself.

But again, it's like an athlete. You have to do it from a young age. And coming to it late, I was damaging myself. But spiritually, it was amazing. You do it in shows. I mean, you've done your own, piano recitals at the Albert Hall for goodness sake. Yeah, yeah, not in the big venue, let's be honest about that.

No, no, no, no. It just doesn't matter. But even so, even so. Exactly. On this show that I do, which you saw at the Albert Hall there, I did it on tour. I've done probably about 40, maybe 50 shows now around the country over the last three years with a big gap, obviously, for 18 months. One of the best shows I did was at a place called Besbrode Pianos in Leeds.

And my agents had taken the booking. I didn't really know where I was going. I knew it was Leeds. and on the train on the way up and said, where am I going? Is it the town hall? Or as he said, it was Bezbrode pianos.

So when I turned up at this place via a taxi, you said, are you sure you want to go there? I went, yeah, he said, all right. So he took me, it's in the middle of the red light district in Leeds. So I turned up, most beautiful old Victorian workshop full of these amazing pianos. But the guy says to me, oh, sir, how long's your show? And I said, oh, it's two hours with an interval.

We're finished by 10. Oh, no, you can't do that. I said, well, that's what I've been booked for. You said, oh no, you see, you know this is a red light district here, don't you? Only legal one in country. I said, oh, yeah. He said, yeah, well, the girls need the streets back by 10.30. So you've got to finish at 10, dead on.

Because they need the streets back 1030 for their work. So I said, all right, I'll cut out a piece by John Field. And I was like, how many pianists have said, I'll cut that piece out so the prostitutes can have the streets back, tell you. But that's effectively what I was doing in Leeds. But when I was playing in Leeds, the reason I mentioned it, really, apart from the quite good story,

is that I just had the best and first out-of-body experience playing the piano where I was playing, I think a piece that you love me playing by Jan Tearsen from the film Amalie. And it's quite repetitive. And I just lost myself so completely that for the first time in whatever 15 shows I'd done by then. I didn't even know there was an audience there. I didn't know where I was. I was just listening to this music flowing through me and looking at the piano keys. And I thought, wow.

And I think you have that as an actor. Sometimes you have it if you're in musicals. you just sometimes you connect so much with what you're doing and you always want that and as a young actor you think that's how I should always feel and you can't always feel the anger or the pain or the loss and if you do you probably you know end up in therapy at the end of a long run which some actors have done

because they feel it too much but with the piano to feel it like that and I've had it again since you know maybe once per show it's the most beautiful beautiful feeling just transcends anything connecting with the music but what you do with your show is that you also do your impression So you have somehow done something which I remember when we were coming to see you

and I think it was beforehand or something and I said to a friend oh we're going to see Alistair and he's going to be doing his impressions and playing the piano and they sort of said sorry he's well he's going to be doing his impressions and playing the piano but it works and you surprised yourself really as well didn't you? Well, I did. I mean, the whole thing was I started playing and Charlie was great. My wife, she just said, you know, when I used to do these little lunchtime recitals in my local church, where there was a fantastic piano, which is why I used to do them there, and have maybe 10 friends just to watch all local people. And she said, you must do some comedy because you're not a good enough pianist just to play the piano. And I used to get a bit upset, you know, and then I thought she's absolutely right. And so I used to do these bits of stand up in between just to introduce the piece and make myself feel at home and say, look, I'm no pianist. I'm going to go wrong, which I always did, but enjoy the bits that are right. And Jaros Brandreth He was a neighbour and a great friend He came along

He said You should do this show You should do this as a show on the road You do a show You do your stand-up You do your voices What do people love We all love to hear

You're doing your impressions And then in between You play these piano pieces And I think it would work very well People would come to listen to the music And they would come to around That's so liken That's so liken

And so like him And so he said this And I thought Jars that's not going to work And then Tony Hawks Another friend From Just a Minute And such programs on Radio

Four Tony said You should do his show now You do your comedy and then do the music in between. And I think people don't because nobody else is doing that. So you do the comedy and then you play the piano and then you do some more comedy.

And everybody goes home happy. And I thought, no, it's not going to work. And then I did the Today Program to publicise a CD that I brought out after about 18 months of playing, which is crazy. But it worked. Yeah, but it did brilliantly well. Yeah, I love it. I worked so hard on that.

My God, that was six hours a day. But John Humphrey is even on that, doing the interview on the Today Program. He said, you should do a live show, you know, where you play your music and then do your comedy in between. between, I'd come and see that. Wouldn't you, Michelle? I'd go and see that. That's what you should do now, young man. Thank you very much indeed. And so enough people had said it. I thought, all right, I'll show you that it doesn't work. And I'm still showing people that it doesn't work. And it does. It does. It does. It really does. The irony of it. I do that routine in there. But it's nice because you have the music. And sometimes if I go and watch a recital, which I don't do very often, partly because it's too much music. You know, just talk to us a bit. I want to know about the pianist. I want to know something about them or all that piece. Tell me better about it. And a lot of pianists and musicians, you know, why should they? But they can't do the talking as well.

And similarly, a lot of comedians, you know, I saw Lee Evans once years ago on TV, actually, doing a show from Wembley Stadium or Wembley, wherever it was. And at the end of it, he played something on the piano, just a piece of music on the piano. And it was the most beautiful thing. And then he just went, good night. And I thought, wow, that works because it's a different beat. And sometimes you can, someone said this to me recently. Sometimes you can laugh too much at a show.

You want to stop laughing and do something else for a bit. And similarly with music, you can hear too much music and just think, oh, just stop for a minute and talk to us. So that's really why I love doing the show is because I don't think anybody else has done anything like it, although apparently people who are old enough, Charlie, my wife told me that apparently Les Dawson started to do this years ago in the northern clubs.

And that's why he developed the playing badly thing because nobody was listening to the music. So he was trying to do what I'm doing, and he was doing some jokes, and he's a piece of list. And he'd play his list, And people would go, what the hell is this? So then he started to play it badly on purpose,

which takes a lot of skill, which I haven't got. That's why that did that. God, I never knew that. That's brilliant. The one thing I ask every single podcast to all of my guests is what makes you belly laugh, but properly lose it laughing. And I've seen you laugh a lot.

You do laugh a lot. But what makes you completely lose it? Gosh. Completely lose it. Being tickled. Being tickled. Yeah. Any sort of tickling.

Even people, my sister used to this when I was a child. She used to tickle me and then she'd get close. So she knew that even if she wasn't tickling me, but pretending or getting close that I would just dissolve in the anticipation of being tickled. So the anticipation of being tickled is probably what makes me stupidly. Alistair, you are brilliant at what you do. And as I said, and I will always say that, I am blessed to have you in my life.

I love you dearly. You are one of the most trustworthy, kind, good people on this planet. And long may you reign, quite frankly, because you're so special. But thank you for this. And thank you for chatting. Thank you. And that brings us to the end of this season of that Gabby Roslyn podcast. Thank you so much for listening and enjoying everything that we've done over the last 43, how many, 43 episodes.

I have loved having every single one of my guests on, and I hope you did too. Now, it's time for a little summer break, but do not fear. Season three will be back starting in September, and rumor has it, we've got some amazing guests coming away. Have a lovely summer, and I'll see you in a couple of months. And when I say amazing, oh boy, I mean massive guests.