The 85 South Show with Karlous Miller, DC Young Fly and Chico Bean - Affion Crockett in the trap! With Karlous Miller, Mona Love and Brandon Lewis! PART 2

Episode Date: August 7, 2021

The legend Affion Crockett is in the trap with his homie Brandon Lewis and Karlous and Mona Love post up to hear stories and game from the legend Affion! You know they gonna talk about tiddays - but A...ffion also tells us how he got in the comedy game, tells us about his break dancing days and tells us his favorite impression to perform!GET LIVE SHOW TICKETSGREENVILLE, SC AUGUST 7thbit.ly/greenvilleghettolegendsFAYETTEVILLE AUGUST 14thbit.ly/fayettevilleghettolegendsThis is the coldest podcast!Hit Our Website for more info: https://www.85southshow.com/Get our custom merchandise: https://85apparelco.com/Subscribe To our Channel: bitly.com/85tubeWATCH KARLOUS' MILLER's COMEDY SPECIAL! https://vimeo.com/ondemand/karlousmil...FOLLOW THE CREWKARLOUS MILLER - https://www.facebook.com/karlousm/DCYOUNGFLY - https://www.facebook.com/DcYoungFly1/CHICO BEAN - https://www.facebook.com/OldSchoolFool/Director - JOE T. NEWMAN - www.ayoungplayer.comProducer CHAD OUBRE - https://www.instagram.com/chadoubre/Producer - LANCE CRAYTON - https://www.instagram.com/cat_corleone_/It's Jon - https://www.instagram.com/holaj_o_n/ Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is an I-Heart podcast. I knew I wanted to obey and submit, but I didn't fully grasp for the rest of my life what that meant. For My Heart Podcasts and Rococo Punch, this is The Turning, River Road. In the woods of Minnesota, a cult leader married himself to 10 girls and forced them into a secret life of abuse. But in 2014, the youngest escaped. Listen to the Turning River Road. road on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Join IHeart Radio and Sarah Spain in celebrating the one-year anniversary of IHart
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Starting point is 00:01:02 and search IHeard Women's Sports to listen now. Welcome to Pretty Private with Ebeney, the podcast where silence is broken and stories are set free. I'm Ebeney, and every Tuesday I'll be sharing all new anonymous stories that would challenge your perceptions and give you new insight on the people around you.
Starting point is 00:01:23 Every Tuesday, make sure you listen to Pretty Private from the Black Effect podcast network. Tune in on the IHeart Radio app Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Hey, what's up, you man, Carlos Miller of the 85 South Show, and I appreciate you checking out my guest, Athe Young, Crockett, Brandon Lewis, and Mona Love. Check out part two of this interview with my special guest.
Starting point is 00:01:46 That's right, part two. I'd like me a little shit, too. We've been thinking about it's not even the white man. Who is it? You don't even understand, bro. America, if you fucking do the same shit these white people doing, you'll be straight. And what is that?
Starting point is 00:02:06 Nigel, any time you see a bunch of white people doing some shit, do that. Tick-Tong. Whatever it is, nigga, do it. We're not being American enough. That's why we're not enjoying this shit. White people don't wear their masks. You don't then.
Starting point is 00:02:23 You know what I mean? I'm going to be like, that's right, brother. That's right. Take their God damn mask off. Just don't understand how this shit work. I think we should start calling the police on that more, though. Man. When they walk by, I locked the door.
Starting point is 00:02:39 You got it locked the door. They grew up in the park, call the police. It's a bunch of people in this park, and they're passing around a ball. Might be stuff of cocaine, but they don't comprehend that. White people don't comprehend that. I'm not talking about that. You're a black person. You'll never be able to call the police, so don't ever do that.
Starting point is 00:02:54 Nope. Nope. I'm just saying. You just have to do shit to the white people anyway. You just have to take advantage of what white people. call freedoms. Like you have to be, go get you a registered gun license.
Starting point is 00:03:05 Join the NRA. Buy you a truck. Put you a big ass American flag out in front of your house, man. We'll get a Confederate one too. Oh, yeah. That's the only way you're going to get any piece in this bitch. You've got to be American, bro. We ain't been
Starting point is 00:03:21 American enough. We got to get, when white people get mad about some shit, we got to show up mad too. You're right. Texas is hiring a motherfucker And we need these credit The only way It's a loser fan
Starting point is 00:03:36 Who would flag the loser flag? It doesn't make any sense It don't matter If you want to be If you ain't leaving Just do what the fuck they're doing I'm not saying it's gonna make your life better It's just gonna buy you some time
Starting point is 00:03:49 I'm gonna just stay a nigga Stay a nigga And they say I look white They know I'm not white They follow me around the store They're gonna be over that white shit In one minute That can be across
Starting point is 00:03:58 Maybe from across the street. Like, is she white? Oh, she's clearly not. Yes. It ain't even white people who get this shit. As soon as you open your mouth. If I don't even open my mouth, my earrings are big. It's over.
Starting point is 00:04:10 We just got to start taking advantage of this shit. Well, no, they follow you because they're like, is she white? And the baggers people are they mixed. That's rude. Why? Because it is. They think you mixed. Say hello.
Starting point is 00:04:21 Before you say, you white. They tension? Yes, because you can see the fingerprint. They do that. They do that to me. Hence the name don't call me white girl. I'm 100% black. I like you.
Starting point is 00:04:31 A hundred? A hundred. I have as much white in me as you have in you. No, I don't have no white in you. You got some white in you, it's impossible. I ain't got no white. No. I got white.
Starting point is 00:04:42 Did you go on Ancestry.com? You remember on Forrest's Girl? When he was showing you all his ancestors that died in the war and it was the same motherfucker over and over again, that's what my family looked like. A bunch of niggas my height, bald head. And a granddad looked just like me. So there's not a drug.
Starting point is 00:04:58 Drop of white than you. First black man to own a horse in North Mississippi. My great, great, granddaddy. Stole it from a white man. Got all kind of black history in my family. You ever heard of a Jerry girl? Yeah. You don't know Jerry last name?
Starting point is 00:05:13 What? Miller. That's hard. I'm a staple in black history, bro. My great... Jerry Miller. My great, great, great-great-granddaddy was the first. black man to put some house speakers in a car.
Starting point is 00:05:34 These random Negro facts. Yeah, random Negro facts. Hell yeah. They had family marched with Dr. King, too, right? Yeah, yeah. Right there with him. He's in the back, though. My grandmother was squirted with a fire hydrant on Turner Street.
Starting point is 00:05:54 For real? With a hydrant? Yeah, they told their little asses to move, and they said, sprayed them with the fire, and they flew. Damn. My great uncle sold some weed to a couple of civil rights leaders. He wouldn't tell me exactly which ones.
Starting point is 00:06:08 He just knew. He said when they used to come to town that they used to hit him up and he'd bring him to business. He was a nigga that down knows up. He did. In the Civil Rights Movement Arena. Yeah. Right. They knew who to call. My granddaddy told me he was selling weed since the 50s.
Starting point is 00:06:23 Wow. They called it hash back then. Riefer. Riefer. They came rolled up You get a couple blocks for $5 in the paper bag He said joints was a dollar then Yeah
Starting point is 00:06:35 Take me back Probably with some bullshit You don't remember Arizona People like they don't remember that Around 2004-tile 3 we smoked Arizona It was only Hayes And it was Arizona That was y'all
Starting point is 00:06:47 We had We had He never smoked shit He never smoked He'd be dancing That's what's up So no smoking at all You're just being dancing
Starting point is 00:06:57 Nah He gonna live forever. That man, dance, do karate, one finger push-up. He's the one who got everybody on their flat-up. So you drink green shit, wake up in the morning, you crunches. Nah. I do drink green shit, though.
Starting point is 00:07:10 Okay. Keep me doing that shit where you have to get on your elbows. But I... Moly, what the fuck is wrong with you? I'm not giving you nothing to this dick, okay? You don't know how to hate handsome your way. You already talked yourself out of this, Mauna. You got random niggas cash apping you and shit You're not ready for me
Starting point is 00:07:32 This thing I don't use microwaves He don't? He's smart because this shit's not good for you He used that iPhone though All the radiation is right there Might as well warm your food up While you're getting this shit Right
Starting point is 00:07:44 This thing I don't use the microwave He don't trust the government And I don't blame him You know how much patience you gotta have To not use the microwave? It ain't that goddamn long Nick That shit's all this hell
Starting point is 00:07:57 Toast the hubbing. You got an air friar? Not yet. Do you not use a microwave because of the radioactive shit? Yeah. Why am I going to swallow radiation? Exactly.
Starting point is 00:08:07 Sure, we got phones. Yeah, that's fucking us up to. But it's on the outside. Right. And you're just going to welcome. When you go to get an x-ray, they put that big ass lid on your motherfucking air. And if you're pregnant, you can't get it.
Starting point is 00:08:19 That's what I'm saying. So you're going to eat the fucking radiation? No, do I eat it? I sit and over. With some pasta sauce, nigga? It's mixed into the pasta sauce. Are you drinking and eating fucking... I'm watching it too because I wait.
Starting point is 00:08:31 That's how I know when to take it out when it bubbles. That shit be too hot. That's how you know this shit killing you. Like microwave gets shit. You've never been to jail. No, I ain't been to jail. This is a good dude. This is different for me.
Starting point is 00:08:44 You know what I mean? No, he ain't never even been there now. You made the grill cheese with the iron? I made fucking deep dish pizza. How long was you in that, mom? I did a year. Damn. Twice.
Starting point is 00:08:55 You did a year twice? I probably came and spoke to you in one of them prisons. I was on a sixth in Market. I used to come down there with Charlie Macon. We was always in the juvenile prisons talking about it. Now, she was in the big girl prison. I was a grown-ass point, though. You're young as far as.
Starting point is 00:09:10 Take the compliment, nigga. How do you make that deep dish piece in there? Right. Listen, so you take tortillas, right? Because you say you tortillas, and then if you get a little spicy beef sausages, and then you take ketchup, and you mix that with sauce and a little sugar, that's your mariner. So you do your first layer. with your meat and the cheese
Starting point is 00:09:28 that you stole from the kitchen cheddar, then you do another layer you might do some fry onions, you know, put some veggies in there. Who fucking get all these ingredients from them? You're in prison. I stole them out the kitchen because I worked there. So you smuggling and everything. I put adobe by the cat
Starting point is 00:09:42 to roll that bitch up on the elevator. Okay. And it was a good time, you know what I'm saying? I hear you. I'm not interested, but I hear you. I've never, ever, ever in my life been around so many fucking women. and it was pretty terrible
Starting point is 00:09:58 but you know in jail a lot people do the past time they fuck especially in girl jail especially to marry women like if your wife's in prison she writes you don't know whether she's fucking some big woman named Bruce because the women had beards there
Starting point is 00:10:10 you know what I mean y'all look shocked bro when the last time you heard a female prison story that's my first thing just like two seconds ago that was that's the first and the last
Starting point is 00:10:23 people say you too pretty Listen, people say, you're too pretty good job. Well, you're laughing at you low-key trying to suck my dick just now. I was definitely laughing. You leave all the way below. I'm that big of a fan. I ain't that big of a fan, y'all. It's a lot of pretty women in jail?
Starting point is 00:10:41 It's a lot of gorgeous. I was in the right position, too ugly. No. Bro, this shit, wow. Every time we try to have a nice little conversation. I've seen a woman get fisted in jail. No cap. It's jail. What else you're gonna do? You fuck, you eat, you fuck, you eat.
Starting point is 00:10:58 Do a couple crunches. You know what I mean? Just passing time. Bitches go to jail. Let's move on. With a fisting. You said, let's move in jail. None of y'all know nobody's been to jail? So, it's women in jail.
Starting point is 00:11:09 No. Fishing each other. I was in the same jail as little Kim. Making deep dish pieces with stolen ingredients. Also handmade dildos made out of pens, pads, and rubber gloves. What? You take pens and pencils as the base. You wrapped them around with sanitary napkin, so it could be solved.
Starting point is 00:11:30 Then you take a rubber glove, put it on top, another one on the bottom, and you have you a dildo, sir. If you want to get fancy, you can make you a strap on her. How is she going to fuck your wife? Big would be married in jail, especially the women that have men. Like, the men that come see her every weekend and shit, she got a hickey, she said she broke out. No, her fucking husband upstairs is giving her that shit.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Bruce, big Bruce. My first cellie was like 350 pounds She was from D.C. And she was in me She had both lockers filled And she said you can't get a locker But you're welcome to get whatever And I needed you to hold me down sometimes
Starting point is 00:12:03 So I was sitting in front of the door Why she fucked people loudly She got it made Big Bruce is the motherfucking man From D.C. Shout out to you You watch this She didn't try to fuck you?
Starting point is 00:12:19 No, she didn't. In jail So I was like a family thing, girl jail. So she was my dad. And my dad did a lot of time in jail, so I remember calling him, and I went on the phone with him. And I'm like, Dad, something, something. He's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't call on them bitch's dad.
Starting point is 00:12:32 It was too late, she was already my dad. So you called you a Sally dad? That was my dad, nigga. We had two lockers. She ordered everything for the room. And we just shared. So how long you were in there? A year.
Starting point is 00:12:46 And you didn't get fucked by nobody? No, I never dated a woman yet. I'm on my way. It's close, Avion. Mm-hmm. That's not my name, but I mean, I hear- She called the nigga Aron. No, I did not.
Starting point is 00:12:57 Oh. I said Avion. Your name's not Avion? No. What is it? A-fion. Oh, it's A-fion. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:05 So I used the F instead of a V. Yeah, and there's never a V in that motherfucker. A-Fee-ion. I mean, I'm close. I know your name, I know. Yeah, I got you. But you put a V in that, motherfucker, and that's not of that. A-Fion.
Starting point is 00:13:16 I got it. It's like calling this nigga Darlose Miller. No way. I don't go by that no more. I used to go by Darlo's. It's different. Damn. It's a different letter.
Starting point is 00:13:27 It's all good. That thing is, I just can't believe these women is in that. That's not bad women want some dick. They didn't have making ink pen dicks, me. And they say,
Starting point is 00:13:38 we'll fuck anything. For sure, ink pen dicks. They get an inkpin dicks. So they take a lot of sex. It's a lot of sex in God jail, too, but you're not going to believe that. No, I seem to... Yeah, that's why we're doing our best to stay.
Starting point is 00:13:50 That's enough to make a nigga, like, what's the law? I was in jail 10 plus years ago, that's a long time ago. I was the kid. I ain't trying to break none of that. People make mistakes, fellas. I'm okay on the outside. I like life. Me too.
Starting point is 00:14:06 I haven't been in a while. So was y'all penalized for, like, when they come and rage y'all shit and they see these dildoes? Everything's contraband. If you have a state-issue shirt and you fucking put a little rule in it, it's contraband. You know what I mean? Just that. Adobo, salt and pepper is contraband, all that's contraband. Happiness is contraband.
Starting point is 00:14:25 Like, jail is terrible. The way they treat people in jail is terrible, too. We have more people in jail here in the United States to anywhere else in the continent. That's why we should treat it. We got more people fucking up. Yeah, but that doesn't mean that they just get treated like shit. You deserve your rights.
Starting point is 00:14:38 Your religious rights, you deserve eating a meal, get a piece of fruit. Exactly. Huge money just to feed them and don't feed them. You don't get an apple. Privatized prison. It's been times a whole month. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:14:48 It's been times a whole month ago, I don't have any fruit and vegetables. That's wrong. Y'all making pieces. Deep dish with tortillas. We need to take, we need to pay more attention to the niggas behind the wall, how they're being treated. I think we did. I'm just saying, can you plug us with some of the bad bitches
Starting point is 00:15:01 that's in prison so we can start sending them something on the world? You know what I'm saying? I don't feel like just because... The same part is some of them are still in jail because I was in jail. I know, and I want to try to build some relationships before they get out here.
Starting point is 00:15:13 I got a couple names. I'm talking about the beautiful ones that you were talking about. Not the ones that was getting fisted and Bruce now. You don't want Bruce information No No
Starting point is 00:15:25 Bruce and him get The same lineup from the barber Yeah Give me the Bruce Yeah Bring my shit up a little bit Like Bruce shit was Shiald and D.C.
Starting point is 00:15:37 Oh Damn, Monnie You just had a rough life I haven't been through some shit Well we glad you're out here With us this summer Me too Man
Starting point is 00:15:44 Last summer too You're saying like I'm fresh home I'm just saying What was the first thing You did when you got home Got fucked So fuck I didn't eat
Starting point is 00:15:53 shit I got fuck I didn't I skipped to it You didn't imagine you got some Fresh out of gym Putz out of the way
Starting point is 00:16:01 Yeah we're not even Get into the crib I ain't done That's some shit I ain't never I never missed dick so much In my life I didn't realize
Starting point is 00:16:06 I liked it So much Until I couldn't have it Mm No nothing would have me Take COD because them
Starting point is 00:16:12 niggas Fuck him too These COs are fucking Mm What? The COs Fuck you This correctional
Starting point is 00:16:20 officers, the police, they'll fuck you. They give you extra milks and fuck you. Extra milk. That's some pimping. Damn. Bitch you want this vitamin D or not? That's just, that's the shit you should have been telling me. Let me be making jokes about it, but it's say, it's terrible.
Starting point is 00:16:41 What's a terrible thing? I'm going to give you 100% dick for this 2%, bitch. You and Joe for five years, then fuck this sloppy, fat-ass CO for some milk. That nigga ain't never quitting this job Fuck no, that's why they got them A lot of weak men like that get CO and cop jobs Y'all know that, they're weird old. 20 years, this guy from high school
Starting point is 00:16:59 and didn't talk to anybody and people smack the shit out of Becca and see it every day and lunch That's who to stay true for us When Jada needed the money for the brother college I'm in a buying need I'm in a buying mate I'm in a buying mate
Starting point is 00:17:10 Well bitch if you want this milk you know what you got to do That was terrible And that bastard didn't go to school That was terrible We don't know what I did to get this fucking money Make you look at your mom different a little bit Don't be in that shower crying Mommy had to do some shit to get them bills paid
Starting point is 00:17:25 Damn You know why he had so many fucking uncles Them ain't your uncles Your mother got one brother She was fucking now You were fucking the men To get you on that school trip You want a hoagie?
Starting point is 00:17:35 I didn't grow up like that I didn't grow up like that day No But you know who mama got at the worst in the movies Forrest Gunt mama She would get my ass Toll out I think it was necessary
Starting point is 00:17:47 Yeah she had to do that She had to do that. She got that dick of some legs. She fucked him some legs. That there is a legend. The last time you heard a bitch fucking for some leaves. That nigga had polio. You know how bad polio was back then?
Starting point is 00:18:01 She got that nigga legs back. She was making him believe that he was. It's part of the game. What was gone? Mama was a hoax. She was a hoax. She did what she had to do. See how big that bitch house was?
Starting point is 00:18:16 She ain't ever worked. Mm-mm. For my heart podcasts and Rococo Punch, this is The Turning, River Road. I knew I wanted to obey and submit, but I didn't fully grasp for the rest of my life what that meant. In the woods of Minnesota, a cult leader married himself to 10 girls and forced them into a secret life of abuse. Why did I think that way? Why did I allow myself to get so sucked in by this man and thinking to the point that if I died for him,
Starting point is 00:18:57 that would be the greatest honor. But in 2014, the youngest of the girls escaped and sparked an international manhunt. For all those years, you know, he was the predator and I was the prey. And then he became the prey. Listen to the Turning River Road on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Your entire identity has been fabricated.
Starting point is 00:19:26 Your beloved brother goes missing without a trace. You discover the depths of your mother's illness, the way it has echoed and reverberated throughout your life, impacting your very legacy. Hi, I'm Danny Shapiro. And these are just a few of the profound and powerful stories I'll be mining on our 12th season of Family Secrets. With over 37 million downloads, we continue to be moved and inspired by our guests and their courageously told stories. I can't wait to share 10 powerful new episodes with you, stories of tangled up identities, concealed truths,
Starting point is 00:20:05 and the way in which family secrets almost always need to be told. I hope you'll join me and my extraordinary guests for this new season of Family Secrets. Listen to Family Secrets Season 12 on the IHeart Radio, app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The OGs of Uncensored Motherhood are back and badder than ever. I'm Erica. And I'm Mila. And we're the host of the Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast, brought to you by the Black
Starting point is 00:20:31 Effect Podcast Network every Wednesday. Historically, men talk too much. And women have quietly listened. And all that stops here. If you like witty women, then this is your tribes. With guests like Corinne Steffens. I've never seen so many women protect predatory men. And then me too happened.
Starting point is 00:20:47 And then everybody else wanted to get pissed off because the white said it was okay. Problem. My oldest daughter, her first day in ninth grade, and I called to ask how I was going. She was like, oh, dad, all they were doing was talking about your thing in class. I ruined my baby's first day of high school. And slumflower.
Starting point is 00:21:03 What turns me on is when a man sends me money. Like, I feel the moisture between my legs when a man sends me money. I'm like, oh, my God, it's go time. You actually sent it? Listen to the Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast every Wednesday. Effect Podcast Network. The IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you go to find your podcast. She didn't know who his father was either.
Starting point is 00:21:28 She didn't. It worked. She named the Force. It worked. Force Gunp went around the world, nigga. Twice. He ran one thing. Own franchises and shit.
Starting point is 00:21:39 Successful. All America. All of that mom's cat. Had his mama not fucked that man. He wouldn't have been at that school. Met the president? Never would have made it to the university. The Alabama.
Starting point is 00:21:48 Ping-pong champ. Come on, man. Saved 100 people in the war. I was running. That's a good-ass movie. It's one of those ones that don't, you don't mind watching it wherever you're at in life. For sure. You could be sitting at the bar, toe up, niggins.
Starting point is 00:22:05 Like, they got four. It's gone on here. Hell not. This is my part right here. White Lieutenant Dan. Jump out of that bill with no neck. Lieutenant Dan. Lieutenant Dan.
Starting point is 00:22:16 He smacked the prostitute, we get mad. With no legs, he slapped the shit out of this too. Forrest Gump beat the motherfucker up like, take off when that nigga tried to grab Jenny. All you saw was for coming through that bit like this. At the Black Panther meeting. What? Sorry, I ruined your Black Panther Paulde.
Starting point is 00:22:36 That's a good piece of cinema. You know who's known for big titties now that's black? See, it's me. It's this nigga. bro, Sherry Shepherd This nigga went back to an hour 15 minutes ago No, because I was trying to
Starting point is 00:22:52 Y'all, I couldn't think of one But there's still no black woman that has the label No black woman has the label As a big titty, yeah There's still no woman that's just known For big titheater. Nah I don't know what Sherry Shepard We know that she has big tities
Starting point is 00:23:07 But what I'm saying is there's no black woman That's known when you say her name Oh, the Titty Girl Like Dolly Parton Dolly Parton is synonymous with titty. Whoop a Goldbird, that's some big titters, too. He is bugging. Nobody even looks at her to the area.
Starting point is 00:23:21 She's just not that type of woman. I love him, man. I ain't never looked at whoopie like that. You just don't. Whoopi don't give you that. Bray, you just can't be out here looking at whoopi-go-bird right there. Don't discuss our tities like that. Brian, you need help, my boy.
Starting point is 00:23:33 Don't touch Whoopi. That's what you are drawing. You don't have nose. You're just whatever with it. It's fucking Moopy Goldberg. Damn. Hey, this is your partner. Who?
Starting point is 00:23:43 This is silly. I claim him, man. That's my nigga, but, you know. I don't know what his mind would be going when he... Look, all right. If you had to, if you had to pick, one... Whoopi Goldberg or Queen Latifah.
Starting point is 00:23:55 We're still going. This is crazy. Y'all won't disrespect who like that. Don't even entertain. That's not a... Whoopin or... It's at a certain point you have to stop. Whoopi a queen.
Starting point is 00:24:04 I'm rocking with the queen or no. On which ones you would rather suck? Whoopi Goldberg and Queen of the Deepa. Whoopi Goldberg don't even ask you. Whoopi Goldberg, love this show. Whoopi Goldberg love this show. man. Queen Beautiful and Whoopie's legend.
Starting point is 00:24:19 If you can't do it, man. I'm not, I'm not doing either one. My favorite Whoopie movies is the movie with the white guy. She has a kid by him and she don't really know. Ted dancing? Ted dancing. Fuck Ted dancing. Fuck them.
Starting point is 00:24:30 My favorite Whoopi Goldberg movie is burglar. Ghost. Ghosts or something. Mine was Eddie because I was an extra in that motherfucker. Hey! That's lit. You did some of Whoopie, that's fucking lit. I was a basketball, uh, court side,
Starting point is 00:24:45 Courtside photographer. You can see me. I'm real blurry in one of the shots. It's beautiful. Hustler. You thought that was going to be one of the one? Nah. But I was doing all the dumb extra shit,
Starting point is 00:24:57 like trying to go eat with the main cast. What was the job you thought was going to be the one? All of them, dick. Now, did you see? Same thing, yeah. Not when I was doing the extra work, but, but yeah, when I first started booking shit, I thought Def Jam.
Starting point is 00:25:11 I thought that was going to be, oh, nigga, I'm on now, Nick. I'm the new Chris Tucker, Nick. Nope. You got to work. Got to work. You got to put it in work. You know what I'm saying? But I'm thankful for every job, though.
Starting point is 00:25:24 Every job is a building block. Is that book special, like, or that big special? Is that the pinnacle for people, that big common special to our own? I don't know. Nothing should ever be a pinnacle. I don't know how many people picked their favorite. I told you which one going to be my favorite. The biggest check.
Starting point is 00:25:40 The biggest one. The money. I definitely want the special. The formula has changed. though back in the day the formula was death jam get on the sitcom sitcom and then you out of there and then you go to movies that's how it was it was like Martin he did the he did death jam then he did the movies then he had a special or no his specials then well kind of the same simultaneously specials in movies in the other way I don't think mark that that that show
Starting point is 00:26:08 gets enough flowers like that shit is still would you watch to like now if you see you see the hoodie big homie send this to me himself oh that's what's like that's Yeah, he did. He sent me shit. Like that show, that moment of time, watching that shit, he came to my stand-up special. He sat in the crowd. I was like, I don't get a fuck with none of y'all niggas say. Martin Lawrence is in my, the audience of my special.
Starting point is 00:26:28 That's crazy. I'll give a fuck what y'all say about me. Big homie stamped. That's crazy. That's crazy. Well, Jay Anthony Browns sent me some hot sauce. That's valid. That's valid.
Starting point is 00:26:42 Yeah. You got damn right. I was running there with some niggas. I'll be around the legends and shit, too. You stand. You were... Jay and the Brown is a legend, though.
Starting point is 00:26:50 You got a club in the way. Tell, yeah. I was doing the J-Spot. I was doing the J-Spot when did nobody give a fuck. Watch that now. He wasn't even there. Jay, a legend. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:03 Shout to Jimt of N. Brown. I did the J-Spot before they remodeled the bitch. And the stage was on the other other side. Jay watched the short time. One night I was in there, bitch. They got the fight. that somebody birthday party, nigger, they towed that bitch. They remodeled that bitch.
Starting point is 00:27:21 For real. They were throwing bottles around that bitch. It was a crazy-ass, mate. I liked the J-spot. I liked you. One day I got hired and I was just walking around. I fucked around and walked past the J-Spot. I was like, I don't walk too far.
Starting point is 00:27:36 I walked far as fuck. I don't know why. I was just walking. And that ain't even know where you need to be walking at. At all, that's Engwood. Nah, not over there. But at least if you're on that side and you keep going west,
Starting point is 00:27:50 it's a little better than if you go to east side. If you're going the other side of the 405. Anything south of Wilshire is dangerous. I feel like every street is dangerous. Everywhere. Yeah. I just feel like it's a lot of tension out there because there ain't nowhere to park.
Starting point is 00:28:08 Especially in L.A. Damn, that's a good theory. Especially. You know how frustrating it is? To be a homeowner, and you can't park in front of your house, but once a week. That's crazy. Right. That's crazy. You got to put your shit on the other side of the street.
Starting point is 00:28:24 You got to put shit in your spot, like semenes and shit, like big hunks and cement. That's how we're doing Philadelphia. Put big chairs. Sometimes just put your kids in the spot. In L.A., you can't park on the street one day or out of the week because the street's sweeping. So you got to maneuver and find other parking on streets. that will allow it, and that it's the most goofy-ass policy ever.
Starting point is 00:28:49 Is it the same day for everybody, or is it alternate days? No, alternate, like Monday, Wednesdays. They let you know when you move in. Let me get street sweeping once a fucking year. They like, get your ass up. The funny thing is I lived in neighborhoods in L.A. that don't have street sweeping, and the streets are cleaner than the ones that got the goddamn sweeping.
Starting point is 00:29:11 This is Atlanta, you clean your own fucking streets. Atlanta's pretty clean It seemed dirty to me Yeah, sometimes Depending on what corner you on Exactly I didn't visit the hood This trip
Starting point is 00:29:23 Good I gotta show you some better shit About Atlanta Because you're not about to leave here You never here, Carlos I know I text you, I'm here You say I'm in Africa
Starting point is 00:29:32 In I be in Africa You're in Atlanta Or you in Connecticut That's a bit difference I was in Bucket I was in Bucket Like that's nice That shit used to be nice
Starting point is 00:29:42 In the 90s That shit that fell off so bad. It looks pretty nice to me. That's the most dangerous part of Atlanta now. It is. These be niggas running down the street. There was a shootout. Niggas just shooting at anybody.
Starting point is 00:29:56 Shooter was caught. No motive. Niggas just mad. Shooting people as they passed by. Don't. Yeah, Buckhead used to be out there. That's crazy how Lenis is the worst mall now. It's the best mall, but it's the worst mall.
Starting point is 00:30:08 You've got metal to take his name, right? No, it's not the best mall. It just has the best shit in it. What's the best mall? What's the best mall? You may tell you, the most slept-on mall, most consistent mall that always came through for niggas in Georgia and no nobody ever mentioned it? West End. Cumberland.
Starting point is 00:30:26 Cumberland Mall got you fresh when you couldn't find shit. Cumberland is that shit, though. Cumberland had your size when then nobody had your size, niggas. Cumberland came through. Shut out the Cumberland. You ain't never really lived in the Atlanta metro area if you ain't never pulled a little. cute out of Cumberland before. Shout out to Cumberland Mall.
Starting point is 00:30:47 Cumberland Mall has been holding niggas down. You know, that is the most That is the most slept on mall. Most slept on mall around this morning. Because a nigga that tell you to go every other mile but come in. Man, Cumberland Mall, got your size.
Starting point is 00:31:00 Nigger will tell you to go. There's always some little holes in there that want to be holiday. You might be buying your business and get stopped. Hey, excuse me, bro. Bro, where are you from? I ain't from down here.
Starting point is 00:31:14 I just fuck with niggas like you. Like, okay, they ain't look deep for a bad, man. Look, look good, like, man. She's doing bad, though, because she live in Cobb County, so she stay with somebody. Card County the best. No what I'm saying? Anytime you meet a cutie and Cobb County.
Starting point is 00:31:32 If she look good, and she live in Cobb County, she stay with somebody. Big cousin, sisters, or somebody. I get you that. I get you. Because you got to ride out there. This ain't like, Four people in an apartment.
Starting point is 00:31:44 They got a big-ass house, but there's a lot of people in that mother. I ain't got time to break the schematics down. No, you're right. No, you're right. Shout out the car. I'm from car. Exactly. Shout out the car.
Starting point is 00:31:54 Yeah, they had you pulling up in Pallisprane Road. She stayed with her auntie. Two big pretty-ass businesses outside. They got a dog only white people here. Like, she got a fat-ass in a border color. This is a bus with a cub, Kenman. He's got a golden retriever They dog went to school
Starting point is 00:32:17 Around this bitch I'm gonna start going back out there Now it's gonna be a lonely And it's gonna be a lonely and it's something I feel everybody gonna take this something And just be single I feel because we've been in the house for a whole year
Starting point is 00:32:35 I don't know niggas is already out I don't really feel like nobody committing to nothing to at least the spring though Damn. Maybe. But they're not lonely. They're not lonely.
Starting point is 00:32:47 Mingling like a mouth. Do you know how many people lost all their hoes doing this quarantine? I'm talking about everything. Because she got the no-year-in-no-year-old. I'm talking about the one who said you were never going to lose her. She's going.
Starting point is 00:32:58 I'm talking about she's somebody fiancé. How and why? They've been laid up for at least eight months. I tell you, you never get to know somebody until you were locked in on some quarantine shit. That's what I'm saying. A lot of motherfuckers was only able to lock in with one person and lost all day holes. I'm talking about it was worse than a flood.
Starting point is 00:33:22 I know niggas who lost eight, nine holes doing this shit. It's a lot of holes. I'm talking about that was his hose. They just found out who was most important. Quarantine wasn't nothing for you, huh? No, it was shitty. She was laid up with a nigger to. It was a nigger for sure.
Starting point is 00:33:39 Don't let her trick you, bro. I did quarantine with him. She said her selling was 350 pounds She was the lookout. That was her dad. You see what happened when you get people in the information? He got, I just noticed. He got a delay.
Starting point is 00:33:53 You can't let that out. Shit come back to him. He had to think about it and then it looped back around this man. Hey, y'all remember we were talking about you going to jail? He's kind of, I'm back a little bit. That's how we got to the titty. That's his name.
Starting point is 00:34:04 Backtrack. He's going to bring them up again. He still want to know if I hit Wolfie or Queen of the States. What's when it's going to Neither one. Did you quarantine alone? Did you quarantine alone?
Starting point is 00:34:16 No. So you had a bitch in there? Yeah, he did. He got a whole family. He said it like you had a wife, you grabbed down, I gotta, oh, look, yeah. That's what marriage do to you. That's like, did you get a bitch a lot of kids,
Starting point is 00:34:28 they live and everybody live, they breathe. That married life. What that shit in on, bro? Yeah, how's that? It ain't for the week. Ain't shit out here in these streets, bro. If you got a good woman, you better work it out. It ain't for the week.
Starting point is 00:34:40 Twenty-four. Seven. 24. Kids is always hungry. Yeah, they're growing. They got to eat. Do you know how to ignore them? Have you mastered that?
Starting point is 00:34:49 Oh, yeah. I got that shit down to a science. They're master. And if you got toddlers, you could fake sleep. That works. But you know what's crazy? These generation babies, if you don't got Wi-Fi, they ain't fucking with you.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Oh, man. They ain't fucking with you. They were literally calling you broke. I'm talking about, can we go home? They broke. They Wi-Fi ain't no good. That shit is a crisis. You got to have a crisis.
Starting point is 00:35:11 internet. You do. Oh, man, went to you move, and you call your kids, and you're like, y'all don't come over here? You're internet on yet? No. We'll come with the internet on. They're not giving the fuck about you. For sure. They don't play with toys no one. No, bro. Game to change.
Starting point is 00:35:30 Tablets. It's a different world. It's a lesson. I love it. Sitting over there and don't fucking talk to me, because I don't want to talk to you either. Love you. How many kids you got, Mon? I have two children. You have some more? Beautiful children. Do I want more?
Starting point is 00:35:42 Yes, when I'm rich, I'll have more. Like three, bong, bong, bong. Or I do like the rich bitches and get a bunch of them and put it in at once. Do that. You see these bitches having twins, that's not natural, they're paying for them. So?
Starting point is 00:35:54 You can pick the high color, legs, how high, how tall, I'm short, all that. For real? I'm about to create me one like a creative player. Me two ball players. Go create me a whole ass baby. X-ray vision. Kids bring joy to your life.
Starting point is 00:36:10 It's like the worst and best thing ever did. They do. Like, you love them. Like, I feel like, if you don't think here and they're like, damn, I could have gave her that $3.50, you don't really love them children. I love shit up. Your parents think about if they weren't right.
Starting point is 00:36:25 Yeah, I'm probably going to have me some more, too. You want more? Hell yeah. I might give me some moat and some step kids. You planning on having stuff? Yeah, I just want to be an old nigger with a room full of kids and people's like, look at y'all. I raised all yo.
Starting point is 00:36:39 How many kids do you have now? One, I feel like I should have had I should have had more when I was younger. You don't have bad. I should have been out here with six and seven. That's wrong. That's wrong. I'm the only child. All birdberry shirt on.
Starting point is 00:36:51 I miss that shit. I should have been getting these old pregnant, bride. If I would have been going to be straight late on. Oh, I would have, ooh. Damn, that's a sad. Because I know I miss two good baby moms. Man, that's a sad.
Starting point is 00:37:03 Because I'd be saying, wouldn't they be posting on Facebook? I'd be like, oh, I should have got her. I pulled it. I'm talking my hour. All I did with owner She'll put it in a Damn
Starting point is 00:37:14 That's a fact, Loz You gotta have more than one Only children are weird Kids need siblings You gotta have somebody You conspired Like I wish you could kill mom You gotta have that person to grow up
Starting point is 00:37:26 I know But I fucked around I did the same shit But them only town kids They love breakfast I got no kids I did what he did All my life
Starting point is 00:37:35 I've been spraying on it Yeah Oh okay Yeah exactly My baby mama I haven't been probably a little bit nicer. I probably would have got another one, but she made me not want another one.
Starting point is 00:37:45 That happens. And she would have just been a little bit, I probably would have ended up with two, but I'm so glad I did. I'd be looking at niggas with two baby models, like, how, nigger? How do you do this shit? You got two people that hate you.
Starting point is 00:38:00 Damn, I wish I would have more kids when I was on you. I should have had some more. How many of you got? I got two. At least you got two. I should have some more. Damn, I should have about five. Woo!
Starting point is 00:38:11 Because we'd be straight by now. No, uh-huh. It's still work, right? It's different now. When you're older, don't nobody want to watch your kids? Mm-mm. No. Shit.
Starting point is 00:38:19 When you're young, man, everybody watch your kids. Don't nobody watch my fucking kids now. Those kids in the trunk, down, stay all back. Yeah, we should have. I miss my opportunity. Should have had some more. They're watching. Podcasts in Rococo Punch, this is the Turning, River Road.
Starting point is 00:38:42 I knew I wanted to obey and submit, but I didn't fully grasp for the rest of my life what that meant. In the woods of Minnesota, a cult leader married himself to 10 girls and forced them into a secret life of abuse. Why did I think that way? Why did I allow myself to get so sucked in by this man? and thinking to the point that if I died for him, that would be the greatest honor. But in 2014, the youngest of the girls escaped and sparked an international manhunt. For all those years, you know, he was the predator and I was the prey. And then he became the prey. Listen to the Turning River Road on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Starting point is 00:39:35 Your entire identity has been fabricated. Your beloved brother goes missing without a trace. You discover the depths of your mother's illness the way it has echoed and reverberated throughout your life, impacting your very legacy. Hi, I'm Danny Shapiro. And these are just a few of the profound and powerful stories I'll be mining on our 12th season of Family Secrets.
Starting point is 00:40:01 With over 37 million downloads, we continue to be moved and inspired by our guests and their courageously told stories. I can't wait to share 10 powerful new episodes with you, stories of tangled up identities, concealed truths, and the way in which family secrets
Starting point is 00:40:19 almost always need to be told. I hope you'll join me and my extraordinary guests for this new season of Family Secrets. Listen to Family Secrets, season 12, on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
Starting point is 00:40:32 or wherever you get your podcasts. The OGs of Uncensored Mother are back and badder than ever. I'm Erica. And I'm Mila. And we're the host of the Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast, brought to you by the Black Effect Podcast Network every Wednesday. Historically, men talk too much.
Starting point is 00:40:49 And women have quietly listened. And all that stops here. If you like witty women, then this is your tribes. With guests like Corinne Steffens. I've never seen so many women protect predatory men. And then me too happened. And then everybody else wanted to get pissed off because the white said it was okay. Problem.
Starting point is 00:41:03 My oldest daughter, her first day in ninth grade, and I called to that. I asked how I was going. She was like, oh, dad, all they were doing was talking about your thing in class. I ruined my baby's first day of high school. And slumflower. What turns me on is when a man sends me money. Like, I feel the moisture between my legs when the man sends me money. I'm like, oh, my God, it's go time.
Starting point is 00:41:24 You actually sent it? Listen to the Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast every Wednesday on the Black Effect Podcast Network. The IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you go to find your podcast. It's downhill now. Now I'm just at the point, like, whatever. Had some more. Not shit. You have to.
Starting point is 00:41:44 Only children are fucking weird. I would be so, it would be so quiet. It would be so boring. I would have, like, imaginary class. So I'm in there talking to like 20 kids. And then I would have an imaginary student teacher. I had to cuss that bitch out because she could never get the kids to relax. Wait, did some shit you did because you was all the child?
Starting point is 00:42:00 What else I'm going to do? Imaginary shit. Damn. It was bad. That's where you went wrong there. and they're making up shit you gotta have more to one kids need somebody to like
Starting point is 00:42:11 buying with should have me some more kids I'm gonna have about three your pull-out game is immaculate if you're really pulling out and not getting nobody pregnant on pre-cum
Starting point is 00:42:21 so that means you know when you pre-cum in because you get pregnant on pre-cum oh yeah hell yeah you got a pre-pull out too you got a jerk it pull out and jerk it now you have to pull it out and wipe it off start over
Starting point is 00:42:31 who's been pregnant up a pre-com I got burning off become She's not sure of that I'm sure of it You know I'm sure of it Because I don't like come What? I don't like to be came in Oh my
Starting point is 00:42:45 But you can't control that Yes you can't pull it the fuck out You can't I can ask for it Because I'm not like I'm just meeting the nigga He knows what I don't like So he's gonna pull out So how you know I was freaking on?
Starting point is 00:43:00 Because he pulled out What's the fucking math? Where's the math Where are we missing here? I don't even know She didn't get nutted up in. Her club didn't get shot up, is what she's trying to say. No, the club didn't get shot out, but it was a shoot in the program, right? Yes, exactly.
Starting point is 00:43:13 That's how I got pregnant. It was a stabbing in the pool. Yeah, exactly. The fight started in the clubs. Yeah, it was in the club, for sure. It was in the booth. The whole club didn't get up. They're so disgusting to get somebody pregnant.
Starting point is 00:43:25 That's what happens when you come in somebody to get pregnant. I don't know why I meant to do that. Like, I feel like, you all know how somebody can really, like, manipulate or, like, try to ruin your life. for so long, so I would be real, like, careful with my come. Because if you, if we and you meet, we're having sex, right? And we don't have that type of relationship. And now I'm pregnant, and you say, yo, I really don't want it.
Starting point is 00:43:46 To me, a woman should take that info in for women, but they don't. Like, a woman knows she wants the baby from the gate. She don't give a fuck about how you feel. I'm learning that. That's why you guys find a woman who don't want it to. I just think it's unfortunate. You don't need that pill. You don't need that birth control pill.
Starting point is 00:44:02 You don't need something to be able to protect you. Nah, we're straight. Y'all really think we're out here trying to live better. We like that. We like the go raw. You don't need no birth control. That's going to take the fun out of it. I think everybody likes that.
Starting point is 00:44:16 They take the thrill out of. You're like, well, she's not pregnant. Oh, fuck. Take this fucking birth control pill and go out here and continue to not get anybody pregnant. If there was a pill that you could take, you wouldn't take it? No. No. Really?
Starting point is 00:44:35 No, because I ever talk shit. I'm gonna be, when I'm in the pussy, I'm like, yeah, this that none, burn control. I'll take no drugs. Like this shit, don't you do? They don't even make this like this no more. No GMOs, no birth control? I got a five. Put my hands on your little remedies and shit?
Starting point is 00:44:49 Nah. It's all. Organic dick. I tell certain people. No preservatives. I'll let you know. Thanks. We had a light skin me.
Starting point is 00:44:58 That's cool. You niggas weren't. Still ain't taking no birth control, mom. Fuck y'all. I mean, if it was out with my mom. My sons of age, I would get it for him. I would put them on and all that. That's a lot of male friends.
Starting point is 00:45:07 I've seen women do things like they. They didn't even want the baby. They just want what he got or want the situation. A bitch is trying to force you into that. Ha, ha, plot twist. I ain't got shit. Er! Got tricked at your pussy!
Starting point is 00:45:20 Thought you had a good baby down here. Thought you had one, bitch. Nah, man. We're just talking shit. I think it's not there, though. That nigga had been sitting up thinking about them kids that should have had ever since I said that shit. For real, man.
Starting point is 00:45:33 Your wife's gonna watch this shit and punch the fuck out of here. Who the fuck was you thinking about when you gazed in air like that? Exactly. You didn't fuck up now. Yeah, you're in trouble. When she's zooming on this gaze?
Starting point is 00:45:42 You're gonna get your ass for it. Yeah. Blink twice if you're in trouble. She hit you? Blank twice. It's all good. We bring you some more kids to the fold, bro.
Starting point is 00:45:56 That's what we're doing. It's the summer. Okay, let's make some kids. Yeah. Let me find me two-step kids. Y'all can make me. They need kids to keep moving. I'm making a child.
Starting point is 00:46:04 I'm a whole body changes. I want two, but I want two more where I'm just fucking their mama. Their dad ain't never coming back or some shit. Just going to be fucking their mama off and on 15, 20 years or something. Help her raise them kids. Step dads are cool. Shout to the stepdags, man. Like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:21 They are. I'm like, who your mama hug? My mom ain't got no hug. She's been messing with the same man 20 years. They need a cool. Uncle who? He's cool as fuck. He cool to have.
Starting point is 00:46:30 Uncle. Uncle daddy. Yeah. There's a lot of good women out here working too hard I had a couple stepdadders in my life A couple Shout out of mine I had the same one forever
Starting point is 00:46:42 I'm glad I ain't have to go through that I had the same one I had a couple, man Damn wrong with it Yeah my daddy was around You had a dad Wow I had a dad
Starting point is 00:46:56 She'll be clapping That's why you were so successful Oh yeah I think you're begging me because you got a dad, nigga? Yeah. No, my dad was awesome. I am better than you a little bit. Yeah, I mean, come on.
Starting point is 00:47:11 You can't make a deep dish pieces, though. I can't. Not a prison joint. Yeah, that's what she better than you. Yeah. I ain't even get to the top layer yet. I want you to make one of the 20s. That's all we had.
Starting point is 00:47:24 Microwave of 190 water. That's the hot water on a unit. If you go down, it's really war. You burn that bitch with it. Manta, when are you coming back to the A? Um, I'm gonna come back next week. Come back, and then I want one of them deep dish joints. Straight pepperoni, though.
Starting point is 00:47:41 I don't need all that extra shit, because we got ingredients now. No pork, though. Huh? I don't eat pork. You don't have to eat it, it's mine. I'm not making you pork. I'm giving you beef pepperoni. Have you had it?
Starting point is 00:47:50 No, I don't want that shit. You want pork. If you had pizza in Philadelphia, you had beef pepperoni. But check this out, though. You were trying to, fuck it. Never mind. You shit probably on YouTube at this point. I don't fucking need you, is all I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:48:04 I wanted you to be included, but once you took that little fucked-up attitude. I'm going to make the pizza for you. I mean, don't tell me what you're not going to put on my shit, though, mom. I'm going to put it on a pizza, but I want you to taste how I taste. I ain't asked about all that. You already sold me on the idea of the bitch being good. I'm like, oh, I wonder what the kind of pizza I like a taste like. I don't like all that shit you name.
Starting point is 00:48:24 I know the ingredients I want on my deep dish. I've been to Chicago. That Philadelphia is a Muslim city. Yeah, it's a lot of Muslims. I'm Muslim. Ain't no point. Don't just pick and choose when to be Muslim. You wasn't Muslim when you was in jail and shit.
Starting point is 00:48:39 Yes, I was. You were following the law dead. I mean, I mean, clearly, like, you can see a Muslim that's practicing because they were overgarming. But I'm Muslim, my faith. Your whole legs is out. You're going to hell. I went to Zuma.
Starting point is 00:48:51 I went to Juma Friday. You got males, tattoos? Yeah. Smoking blunts? And children. And kids? Out of wet life. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:59 What? You know you can't touch the women when they don't judge? She hugged me when I walk in here They were stoned and shit out of her Yes I didn't know that But you can't hug the women
Starting point is 00:49:11 Or you can't you know what? You know what you know the crazy shit though When I went over there to Dubai They still be trying to flirt They'd be looking at the nigga They'd be like you're not supposed to make eye contact Like that. Man they be doing
Starting point is 00:49:21 They hit a nigga with them eyes You went to Dubai? Hell yeah Scary is a motherfucker Was it? Because you see how we're just normal and then you see somebody show up and then my fuck got a tent on. You're like, oh
Starting point is 00:49:33 it kind of catch you off guard. Could you smoke weed there? No. It was like no weed, no, can't be shit over there. Uh-uh, you can't do shit. You got to buy some street water. They got some niggas over there that's so black. They look like they blue. They're probably beautiful. But if you call them black, they'd be like, no, you're black. Yeah, yeah, you're black. Yeah, you're black.
Starting point is 00:49:49 Yeah, yeah. I'm talking about this nigga would look like he was frozen or some shit, like a purplish blue. Mm. What's a black-ass hat? That colorism goes in every difference, not just black people. I don't give a fuck.
Starting point is 00:50:03 Some of them niggins were so excited to see me, though. I was like, I don't know what the fuck y'all was. I can pull up at the gas station, they got these dudes who just pumped the gas. I guess a lot of shit over there that's real baller. They're from regular-ass people. They got gas pumps in them. I got out the car. And there's the Carlos Wallin'outs, sore brother!
Starting point is 00:50:24 So brother! They pump your gas in New Jersey, too, you know. I love. They pump your gas in New Jersey. I ain't never had to buy gas in New Jersey. You never been to Lany City? Yeah, I do. I got a show coming up there.
Starting point is 00:50:37 I'm just come in and do my show and shit. Well, you're doing better than me, nigga. I ain't never been to Dubai. What you mean? I haven't been to Dubai. How is that doing better than you? Because you've been to Dubai. You went over Eddie Murphy house.
Starting point is 00:50:50 You went over Eddie Murphy house. You went over Eddie Murphy house? He said Eddie Murphy leaving a castle, bro. Did he tell you? Eddie Murphy about me, bro. That's how niggas are. You did? My nigga.
Starting point is 00:51:05 Come on, man. My niggins. As long as you did. Because my nab didn't. Nab didn't. Nab did the whole movie with him. Didn't even tell Eddie Murphy that. That's fucked up.
Starting point is 00:51:16 It's ten niggas waiting for me to tell him about you. But you know me too long. I ain't never been a hater. Word. I spread love. Word. I can't, look. Eddie, Eddie's a known boxing fan
Starting point is 00:51:27 and he had these big boxing. viewing parties at there's no way to explain that shit it's literally like in the beginning and coming to America when King Jopi Jopir is walking him through
Starting point is 00:51:40 and his zebras and shit walking, you know what I mean? They're walking out and that's his house he still lived there and that motherfucking Zamunda So the first house is his house The Zamunda Castle? Remember in the beginning of the movie
Starting point is 00:51:54 Paramount, you see the Paramount logo and then you see that big ass fucking castle in the middle of the forest that's his house oh I ain't know that my son works where is he now
Starting point is 00:52:08 believe me I've tied my own shoes once it is an overrated experience let them wait I'm talking to my son I love that fucking movie legendary what you think about the second one
Starting point is 00:52:27 I think that you can't follow a classic like that. I agree. It's just, just leave it alone. You cannot sequel everything. But again, Eddie always gonna be the goat. I got a painting of that nigga on my wall, so I'm gonna always pay homage. Is that your favorite comedian? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:44 Who's your favorite comedian? Carlos Miller. Who's your favorite comedian? Prior. Prior to, but I like, alive. Alive? Yeah. Earthquake.
Starting point is 00:53:00 David Chappelle for me. It was prior Paul Mooney, but they're gone. I'm a huge Paul Mooney fan. Like, I have a goal of making niggas walk out like he did. Paul Mooney is fine. I watch Kobe Brand a lot. I'm my own fan. That's hard.
Starting point is 00:53:14 I'm the goat. That's hard. I mean, Mamba mindset. If you don't believe me, let's book the show and you prove it to me. You gotta beat me. Quit touching shit. Fuck that.
Starting point is 00:53:26 That's gonna get whoever. That's how you're supposed to think. Whoever you want to get. That's that rapper shit. When I get to heaven, I'm gonna follow some of them niggins. That's that rap shit. I mean, I'm the truth too, niggins. You're funny.
Starting point is 00:53:36 Yeah, I was up at Jesus' last weekend. Yeah, nigga, I got a stand in on too, yeah. That's hard, bro. Yeah, I'll be doing this shit in the next life too. Who's your second favorite comedian? One of these niggas. You know, one of them. Whoever.
Starting point is 00:53:59 Whoever. Callas don't give a fuck. Damn show don't. Fuck around to say the wrong name. Whatever. A lot of the niggins don't like me no, so. You've been made it.
Starting point is 00:54:11 Fuck around and show love to the wrong motherfucker. I'm fucking with you. I fuck with you because you're an island. You don't mind being on that island and you don't give a fuck who swim up to it or who leave it. You're going to always be there.
Starting point is 00:54:24 island and that's what you you're content with that exactly as long as you content you can always have peace peaceful as a motherfucker because you don't need no other island to come join your island you good good that's exactly how i like it this game to break your heart if you believe this shit man back don't look them take your motherfucking heart mm-mm that's why you see niggas that they're going crazy right now because they be thinking they're hey this the one and then when that one ain't the they don't have no backup plan. Especially when you're not, like, I mean, people, you know, people, some people are really trying, really hard.
Starting point is 00:55:01 It was, like I said, early was comedy college at Warm Daddy's in Philadelphia. You could pay $5,000 to learn. To me, you can't learn how to be funny. It's like, no matter. That's more of preparation, though. I mean, or maybe timing or whatever, but somebody... Could somebody check on the chicken, please?
Starting point is 00:55:17 Some of the people's just, you don't have a funny bone of your body. It's something, it's just not it for you. But for me, I feel like, when you find, Well, for me, like me making somebody laugh, making myself laugh. Like, that shit makes me feel better. Like, that's how I've gotten through shit my whole life. So while I'm under a bridge, homeless, or I'm in a fucking mansion, I'm going to be laughing and making somebody next to the head.
Starting point is 00:55:37 Do you have a herringbone on your sock? Yes, I do. And look at the chain matches. It's black on. She's a queen of the hood, bro. She's making up for that time. She's spinning the hole. This shit came out of a time machine from 1992.
Starting point is 00:55:52 Yeah, bro. Damn. She used to date a drug dealer, and he gave it. I'm not bad at it. I'm actually not bad at it. The chain was bigger, and it broke, so she made a chain. She made a link, a linklet. You used to do this shit?
Starting point is 00:56:06 No, I said, remember when they did. In the early 90s, that was the thing that would snatch your pocketbook, you don't remember. I tried to stay away from their life. You freak your black in mouths? I don't champ on, no. I just smoke them. You just smoke your blackout? No.
Starting point is 00:56:20 My brother here, he champ shit. I don't do that. What? I just smoke him. I think that's a... Ain't that like the sin? Why are you judging me? You're supposed to freak the Black & Mounds, I thought. And make it poor a better.
Starting point is 00:56:30 I don't think you know shit about Black and Mounds. You got flat shoes, my boy. The shoes is too flat. You're not even about that life. Yeah, niggas that wear vets. He has no socks on. He has smoked blacks. He doesn't smoke black.
Starting point is 00:56:41 He don't got no socks on. That man is happy in life. He gave up. He just be out there with this nigga with no socks on, but. I look that nigga do what the fuck he do. These vans, bro. Are you don't post the office? He don't wrote on his shoes, man.
Starting point is 00:56:55 Tours shirt, vans, it goes together. You feel me? Yeah. You got like an hour. He's going to wear shoes with no arches, nigga. He don't give a fuck. Generally, any think that you could fall in hand is enough for me. He a flat-footed beast, and I don't get in his motherfucking way.
Starting point is 00:57:11 Let him do what the fuck he do. He won't. He is cold, bro. He's not going to be. He cold. I think the nigga got to be recognized as a cold nigga, though. Keep doing your thing, Brandon Lewis. Thank you, dog.
Starting point is 00:57:22 Don't never let this be the last time you come to the trap. What can they find you at? He's from the A. You can find me on Instagram. Who is Brandon Lewis? A new season of Roast Me. I host Roast Me on All Def Diff. New season, I came to Atlanta.
Starting point is 00:57:43 I got all my dogs. You didn't get me. So now I know ain't your dogs. Now I know I ain't your dogs. You are my dog, but you ain't over a look. I could have did something. I could have came up. came down there and said, you know, this my dog shit,
Starting point is 00:57:54 just coming down here to show love the brand. But fuck it, go ahead. But I got set it off, though. But I got set it off. All right, go ahead. Thank you. Shout out to set it off, man. You gotta get these niggas a hard time, bro.
Starting point is 00:58:05 No matter where you're at in life. I know your rhythm. Can I listen to what you're not going on? Yes. Please tell them where your only fans is. Okay, well, don't call me white girl. I don't have only fans. You could just DM me and I'll see you a picture this pussy through the cash act.
Starting point is 00:58:19 How much you're gonna push on the pussy? Ask me in a DM from a question. I feel a lot of judgment coming off. No, no. No, that wasn't no judgment. You ain't got no fucking socks on. I'm trying to be polite with you. You don't supposed to wear socks all the time.
Starting point is 00:58:32 Up north, if you could ball your fucking sticks in a ball. That's a no for us, but I ain't judge you about it. I like it. I like the aesthetics. Stop fucking judging me. I mean in jail smoke blacks. Anyway, I got a show in Baltimore, July 31st, okay? I'm on Jazz and Sellin's album.
Starting point is 00:58:48 I'm on here talking about my daddy issues. Terrible. You should go check it out. I love jazz. She's the best. She's gorgeous. She can sing. She's amazing. She's amazing. Wait, she was on the new album? I'm on a new album. Hotel. Hotel. I have a hotel. Check me out. Don't call me white girl. Don't forget. And I have something really big coming out that I can't talk about. But it's really a show. Okay. All right? This is lit for me. You know what I mean? I'm trying to get these kids up together.
Starting point is 00:59:13 I'm not mad at you. Listen, you can't be. He's out there to snatch purses. You know what I'm saying? What's next? I'm producing shit right now. We didn't do some TV shows. Yeah. A bunch of other shit. Yeah. I do everything.
Starting point is 00:59:27 I'm up the mindset of no limitations. I can do whatever I want. Let's create some. We got 85 South Media. We got our own media company. We got our own record company. We got our own studio. We get ready to take the Tyler Perry rubber.
Starting point is 00:59:42 Y'all are the blueprint to what a lot of niggas need to be paying attention to. Your niggas earn? Yeah. All right. No, I'm serious, though. Like, y'all are the blueprint. of taking an opportunity and making a business out of it
Starting point is 00:59:57 making an enterprise a multi-faceted multi-branched business out of it it's fucking brilliant bro that's what we've been trying to tell these motherfuggers I think they scared to fuck with us all these people bro we legit out there all what people n nigga we get we'll wrap off camera
Starting point is 01:00:15 because I don't like to say shit on here because they steal so much content from this show without you saying any name Fuck them people. Y'all making your own bread on your own. People are gonna steal anyway, but just how I look at that, right? People have been stealing my YouTube videos,
Starting point is 01:00:32 they steal my IG lives, and they put them on all kinds of pages, and they get their revenue shares. I look at that shit as, okay, we in the 90s, and y'all niggas is my street team. So I ain't had to go pay y'all niggas directly. Go get your little rev share off of that video. But now y'all are promoting my name
Starting point is 01:00:51 as if my face was on the side of a van or a car. But, I mean, that part I'm okay with. I would just, a clip of me talking on the podcast a year ago just went viral. No, they'll take the whole shit. That's what I want to know. How do you feel about a motherfucker taking your bit and just seeing it out their mouth? You know what I mean? I've had niggas take.
Starting point is 01:01:08 Actual jokes. I had that niggas take the pep ready to dick ready. Whole shit. Whole minute the stage. You got to run up on people like that. That's what I feel like. You have to have a conversation. If someone's taking your material, I'm talking about something different.
Starting point is 01:01:18 That's why I'm trying to sue the Internet. The media. Seriously, though. I feel what you're saying. You gotta get like these record companies. These motherfuckers got so much fingerprints and their music that... That's what I'm talking about.
Starting point is 01:01:32 Them people right there. You want to ID your shit, I get it. Yeah. Those people who show up with the fucking paper hanging out to brief kids. You see somebody doing a Carlos Miller bit. It's all in the comments. You stole it some Carlos.
Starting point is 01:01:44 The people see. They talk about it. You know what I mean? We appreciate them people. We appreciate y'all. Don't stop. from Carlos Miller. All I'm saying is there are a lot of people out here
Starting point is 01:01:54 with great material. Still some of that. You have to use all of mine. I'm gonna be up in this bitch doing sign language. Like, loo-what the fuck happened? And it's still gonna be funnier. That's the day. They got it all.
Starting point is 01:02:07 Stoned everything. Took everything. I ain't anything. Stombed my boys. They stole my... How are you going to have a death association on your ass? My jokes in. You, my, it's gonna be 50 deaf niggas in this nigga DM.
Starting point is 01:02:23 Yo, that was fucked up. And they gotta send you videos so you can really fill them. It's gonna be a silent protest. Oh my god, the quietest protest ever is gonna be 100 deaf niggas. Silently marching. You know, they're really gonna be the sign language. The fake sign language. Yeah, we love the deaf people.
Starting point is 01:02:40 We love y'all. They didn't hear you. A, B, C. They love a joke too. Y'all can take a joke. They didn't. I know the alphabet. They ain't going to hit this shit
Starting point is 01:02:51 until the captions come out. Oh, really? Wren? RIN. Oh, my God. Wren? Wren. Oh, God.
Starting point is 01:03:01 Yeah. All right. I don't have one. For real? No. See? Fuck them people. That's why I've been saying.
Starting point is 01:03:11 No, it's not even about, for me, it's just, impressions are one of my tools to get the, to get the, job done. You know what I mean? I'm not an impressionist. I'm just a nigger who got a couple talents and I use every talent that makes money to pay these fucking bills. What's the fan favorite people ask for the most? Oh, Jay-Z. Y'all about to say it's hold for me. They always ask J-ZZ. But recently, they started asking more for Maya Angelou. You do Denzel too. No, I don't do Denzel. I do a version, but now that's Jayfair. Chris Rock. Chris Rock. Chris Rock, yeah. But no,
Starting point is 01:03:46 Maya Angelou, my ain't got bars. Y'all niggas on. Y'all, she's one of the original emcees. I'm just trying, I'm here to tell you all, listen. Surely I'm there for you. Anytime you need me. For real, girl, it's me in your world. Believe me. The world is it.
Starting point is 01:04:04 The world is nil. It's the world. The world is yours. It's mine, it's mine. It's crazy. Whose world is this? I would think she was so here. I would think she was still here.
Starting point is 01:04:19 That's true. Carlos Miller, look at you and I'm talking to you. I can't. The world is yours. Stop, man. You're an island. You're like a rubour. With blue waters floating all around your sand.
Starting point is 01:04:35 But inside of that island, you're still a nigger. You're still a solid nigger. And I salute thee. And still, I rise. I rise. Like a Phoenix, how does he have a man? Hey man, this has been another episode of 85 South, so we have this bitch.
Starting point is 01:05:00 That shit is crazy. Let's get a photo, man. My guy. What time is it? I got a piss. We gotta take a picture. Let's do it. Sit back down.
Starting point is 01:05:11 He didn't even say please, that niggas. Sit back down, please. Come on over here, Tiddy. I'm going over here, tiddies. Why, you keep scooting over here, but we could go closer like we knew each other. I knew I wanted to obey and submit, but I didn't fully grasp for the rest of my life what that meant. For My Heart Podcasts and Rococo Punch, this is the Turning, River Road. In the woods of Minnesota, a cult leader married himself to ten girls and forced them into a secret life of abuse.
Starting point is 01:05:46 but in 2014, the youngest escaped. Listen to the Turning River Road on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Join IHeart Radio and Sarah Spain in celebrating the one-year anniversary of IHeart Women's Sports. With powerful interviews and insider analysis,
Starting point is 01:06:06 our shows have connected fans with the heart of women's sports. In just one year, the network has launched 15 shows and built a community united by passion. Podcasts that amplify the voices of Women in Sports. Thank you for supporting IHeart Women's Sports and our founding sponsors,
Starting point is 01:06:21 Elf Beauty, Capital One, and Novartis. Just open the free IHeart app and search IHeard Women's Sports to listen now. Welcome to Pretty Private with Ebeney, the podcast where silence is broken and stories are set free. I'm Ebeney, and every Tuesday I'll be sharing all new anonymous stories that would challenge your perceptions and give you new insight on the people around you. Every Tuesday, make sure you listen to Pretty Private from the Black Effect Podcast Network. Tune in on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Starting point is 01:06:57 This is an IHeart podcast.

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