The 85 South Show with Karlous Miller, DC Young Fly and Chico Bean - "KARLOUS' Cook Out" w/ MALIK S. & JUSTIN WHITEHEAD | 85 SOUTH SHOW

Episode Date: May 8, 2026

Karlous Miller, Malik S., and Justin Whitehead engage in a candid conversation covering comedy industry experiences, touring memories, and evolving trends in entertainment. || 85 SOUTH App: www.channeleightyfive.com || Twitter/IG: @85SouthShow || Our Website: www.85southshow.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed Human. Another podcast from some SNL, late-night comedy guy, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer, Streeter Seidel, help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. Where does your group perform?

We do some retirement homes. Those people are starving for banter. Listen to humor me with Robert Smigel and friends on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey everyone, it's Ryder Strong and Will Ferdell from PodMeets World. And now the PodMeets Twirled podcast. We're two men who were completely clueless to reality TV, and we're gearing up for the season finale of Survivor. I know we annoyed a lot of our listeners by our severe lack of survivor knowledge. That is the point of the show. I'm just going to remind you,

aha, who, ah, who. Again, we are experts. The pod meets twirled on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Therapy is fantastic, but once again, it does not have a monopoly on healing. That's why I create the resources and that's why I create the community because I really just want you to have more access. On the podcast, Cultivating Her Space, Dr. Dom and Terry Lomax create a space where black women can show up fully and be heard. It's tough because we're suppressing our emotions and so many of us are like high achieving individuals. Listen to cultivating her space on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Your 20s can be so exciting, but they can also be really overwhelming, confusing, and honestly, just kind of lonely.

May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and the psychology of your 20s is breaking down the science behind the biggest roadblocks we face. I was six years into my career, the 80-hour weeks, and just the first one in, the last one out, and I ended up. up burning out. There was a large chunk of my 20s that I like was just so wanting to like be out of that phase out of my skin and I just like really regret not living in the present more. You don't need to have everything figured out right now. You just need to

understand yourself a little bit better. Listen to the psychology of your 20s on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. What's off limits man? What we can't talk about today? Man nigga I just shut it down. Just go. All right. I know how to not say shit.

I'm just saying. Yeah. I'm gonna fucking be calling back to my, hey, man. You can cut that the ball out when I see a fucking niggins, man. You know what we do got in common, we ain't got no girl. I know. I lost my eyes 20, 21. Damn. Yeah, nigga.

That's just still weird. Every day, bro. It's weird as fuck, like, nigga. I be like, how I ain't got no mom, nigga, this shit. I know. You're supposed to have a mom. I could deal with it. Like if my daddy wasn't around in my mind?

See, my daddy wasn't around. So when he died, I was like. My daddy was around, though. I was like, niggas die every day. He's around. Right. But a mama, nigga. My mama?

That shit different, dog. I ain't nobody, son. Don't nobody know that shit today. Go through it. Man, my mom ain't here to call these whole bald head bitty. I'm mad about that. Yeah. I'm mad about that.

If you got your mama, nigga, call it when we leave here. Nigger, I wish. You're right. Fuck that. I've been mourning this shit so long. I'm about to start replacing family members with motherfuckers of my choice. I'm looking for me two new grandmama. I need two grandmas.

You're going to crack. I want old school grandma with the Ain't no more old school grandma with the Bible and the apron. I want one with the tear care and at least one gold too. Let me tell you how you know let me tell you how you know ain't no good grandma

niggins they'd be at your show. No. A good grandma would never be at your show. Ain't no more good grandmas though. Man, I miss two. They be coming to the second show. Bitch, why are you here? We're at 7 o'clock.

And you're at the 9.30? Mm-hmm. I know you ain't going to church tomorrow. You ain't know where your Bible is. That shit be funny as hell. They be old as fuck out. You all know they're old till you see what they're drinking. I'm like, man, what you drink?

Gin. Yeah! But you ain't here drinking gin. And mixing it with bright and earl orange. He's drinking. Bumby face gin out of her purse. You go outside, you see 17 Buicks. You're like, yeah, this is an old ass crime.

All of them got them regals. The crazy part is, this is the craziest shit to me. My mom passed right. But my stepdad married, well, he married, he got another woman that he's dealing with. She reminds me so much of my mama. So you got a clone? No, I'm like, this is weird! That's how he's dealing with the grief.

He grieving. But I'm like, shit. Like if you catch it from the side, hold up. That shit the fuck you. Yeah, that's how he's dealing with it. Yeah, yeah. And they'd be crazy too, man. They'd be crazy too, man.

My mama passed in there, this. My stepdad is left. So I feel like at any moment, he'd be like, all right, go on get the fuck out of here, man. You're gonna go. Your mama gone, nigga. This ain't your house, no. Give me that goddamn keep-backed.

It was a package deal. But the crazy part of that was, man, he would be right. It was a package deal, nigga. You kinda right, my kid. Y'all niggas got to go, man. That's fucked up, bro. If you were a man, and then your wife passed,

and then you still got your shirt. step kid. Man. It depends how long they was in my life. I mean, he doesn't really fucking with you all. So, if he get a new woman,

them ain't even her stepkids. They're like her friends. This ain't even your real kids. They're just kids just around at this point. She'd be like, these ain't even our kids at all. They ain't even yours.

With your new woman, like, you know, you're going to accept my step. So they're my step-step kids. You mean these three grown, niggins? No, I'm not doing that. Nick, these are our cousins. These are co-workersers, nigga. That's the dark side of it.

But you're right, though. For real, it's our coworkers, nigger. Goal said. No. But I'm on. You know, Justin? We've been talking about it. You know, I don't.

Way. Comment. Yeah. I don't hang around niggies. That ain't funny. I know the nigga funny if you got him here, Nick. I don't know. You probably seen something as big.

I know you an asshole from before. But I'm from the older school. You're right there, yeah. You don't even really shoot for you. You're the last class of the new niggas. I know. I'll be trying to tell them about the golden era. They don't know that 1030 show had the imprard, they don't know.

They ain't never had to wait on binge of the finish. Just two hours set to... Yeah, and get booed just to get booed. Exactly. God. way to two hours to get booed. As soon as you get up now. Get your pussy's ass on that stage, nigga, like that.

So, Ben, go headline. And then it's open, Mike? No, listen. Basically. Dig, this. You still get paid, though. Off the rip. He's probably going to do an hour at least for he brings up anybody.

Oh, he hosting. He hosting. She is. He going to do an hour. And kill. Kill. This is his crowd. Because they came to see him.

All the hosies you broke with the home. Nigger, all the dope boys, all the UM niggas. All the strippers. Nick, everybody in there, nigga. So he's gonna go up there and kill. Then he'll bring the feature up. Do another 20. The feature might get to do a good 15.

If he survived. Right. Then Benji is going to come up and do another hour. Am I pushing? Before the headliner. Yeah. Ooh. Then the headliner got to come through.

The show are already. Two and a half, three hours long. Niggas on that. So he were hosting this. Wait a minute. I'm not done. The headliner finished. He's going to do a number.

Another hour. Shit. My, my bullshit. He exaggerated, but it will be a long. He gonna do at least 30 good minutes after that headliner. Yeah. Because the shit that he's doing is jokes that this crowd never gonna get tired of. Nigger, they love, and if you bomb, that's an extra hour.

Yeah, that's what the good old days though, nigga. Shit was fun as hell. What was this? Miami. Yeah, if you're ripping Miami. Shout out the binge of even having all that material. to do though. If you ripped in Miami,

you was good anywhere in the country. Any way in the country. If you could see, it was. You know, a whole lot of places. Nigga, your confidence was like on 10, nigga. Like, you'd be like, nigga, I just ripped the 1030 show,

nigga. You'd be like, I'd go anywhere and do comedy. That shit was unreal. You think I'm bullshit. These some of the richest niggas who you would never know if you didn't go to that show.

You'll see a nigga in there with a chain on. This motherfucker's big. All damage. sitting front row Dickie said though No clothes Nick straight Dickie says

With 13 bitches with him Nick trick used to walk through that bitch 15 deep nigga Nigg Nick Dick Willis McGayey Portis all the middle Nick Nick Ligleyer

The man that nigga Oh Kenny He would contract He had a big ass Phantom He would park Right right at the dough Kenny

Yeah They said that niggas The rich niggas You just pull up to the dog That shit was crayon It wasn't supposed to be no parking Yeah But they could

When you got a phantom nigga you can part that bitch Yeah You wanted the niggas That was actually Able to perform At tripping on Tuesday Yeah

That was in Miami No that's here That's here All happened And so they had That's another All night Everybody couldn't do that bitch

Everybody couldn't do it Yeah That was the Atlanta version because literally everybody in the city being that bitch. Yep. Anybody who you ever heard live in Atlanta was in that bitch. Lloyd Mayweather.

Ain't no more rooms like that no more. Bobby Brown? They ain't like that no more. No, it ain't like that no more. People too cool to come out. The whole so-so death. They booed your a show another. I ain't never got booed at none of this shit.

Don't speak that on my spirit, man. Nick, you know what I'm talking about. My reputation flawless when it comes to that comment. booed others. Because you know they don't boo no more. Shit. Where? And they're still booing Miami, nigga.

They still booing Miami. I must be doing pretty well myself. See? You know what? The boo culture has softened, though. What? It has softened. Oh, okay.

I thought you nigga had glitter on his face. No. No, no, no, no, no. Got them glitter on his face. No, no, no. Remember Frozen Tadles? Hell yeah. I just telling him.

Like a fucking. Frozen Palace won't no bullshit. Nigger you be standing right here, no stage, digger. It's a CVS? It's a CVA. Yeah, nah. Yeah, see, I came in 2012. I came in 2012, so whatever was it.

Right down Old National, when you get to the Walmart and look to the left where that CVS is, it's a CVS. Wall Greens or some shit. It's actually both of them right there together right across the street from each other. Right there. The only place they were doing comedy when I moved up here with Dugans, right there in that Walmart part. Which one?

We did comedy at all the Duggan. On the O-O-Net. Oh, yeah. The one on the east side was the original Dugans. Food stamp used to host that bitch. The one on Memorial Drive. Remember that shit? I did all those shit.

Man, you used to come through here and run through those shit. I used to go through all the time, man. I used to be here all the time. That's when shit was fun. You could pick up 600 in a night in Atlanta. That was a good one. Yeah. The first time back then, yeah.

A thousand-dollar little run in the city. I thought I was that nigger. You ain't even had to leave. I'm talking about, because this is the city where I just rode around looking for a $50. You don't know.

I can, I'm done gutted their ass for a thousand. I'm like, oh. Ain't taking that list now. I'll never lose again. Hell yeah. Yep. Used to put them growing together, boy.

It was so many rooms around this bitch. It really was. It's just, you had to really work them, though. It broke my heart to see cats. gone. You were running cats when I moved up here. I brought that shit to life. Yeah. You were running that motherfucker. When I moved here, Lowe's going crazy.

Yeah. Cat Tuesday night, nigger. I don't talking about. Yeah. Hell yeah. That's the game, though. That nigga came in strong though. Yeah.

Lose came in strong. He was one of the ones that came in funny. He was a few of us came in funny and he was one of them. He just came in funny as a young boy. Talked that shit, Malik. as you was there. They think I'd be exaggerating when I tell them about that.

Who? Comedians. My peers. I'm like, bro, y'all wasn't even there, though. I remember when y'all niggas were scared to go on stage. Right. They remember.

Yeah. They remember. But the Mississippi niggas be funny, though. JJ from the still, niggas. That nigger, hollack. If you're from Mississippi, you're going to be funny.

Bob B. I always got to bring up both people. Steve, he's funny? Steve from Alabama. Oh, he's from Alabama. Who else from Mississippi? It's me. Oh, you know, Miss Tippy?

Rita Brent. She's funny? Bo Peet. Yeah. The Mississippi niggas funny. Who else? It's a few more. It's a few more guys.

You know it's a young name Mississippi right now and killing it. We don't even know about him yet. It's always a young nigga you only know about him yet. It's a lot of niggies from Mississippi, actually though. K-dub from Mississippi. Originally? Yeah. I thought he was from Memphis.

Oh, he was born. Mississippi and nigga. Yeah. Do we start? Marvin Hunter is from Mississippi. Oh shit, I didn't know.

That's how you're starting. Oh, yeah, Marvin Hunter, Mississippi. Yeah. Yeah. Hunter. And $400 on the motherfucker. Man, his Instagram, man, he'd be kidding. How he'd be doing the little wordplay?

Yeah. Like, what it was? What did it? Because he already started to see it. Yeah. I feel like I know I'm forgetting some motherfuckers, but this is gonna fucking They're gonna be mad now. It's all good.

They will be whoop my ass. Shout out to all Mississippi niggas, man. It's just, niggins that moved other places than you'd be forgetting they from Mississippi though. Right. But you, you and- Memphis, you and-Mefin'nick too. It's the same shit, literally though.

You and JJ is the ones that I know for show, for show. Absolutely. Shout out to JJ from Mississippi. Yeah. Yeah, man. Yeah. Talk to that. shit the good old days man what you missed the most about that time that you had to

really do this shit man yeah you couldn't really count on gimmicks it weren't no social media you had to really do it and people had to talk about you so it wasn't like you could just put your video out yeah people had to really go to work man I seen this little dude from Mississippi name something I think loz to call it you know what I'm saying that's that's what it was I'd be wondering about that all the time I was, though. I always go back to, like, you think, like, somebody like, if you go way back to show what real crazy talent was, somebody like Bob Marley, who was worldwide, no nothing. It wasn't even no internet.

Right. So that's how good you had to be. Right. And he was only 36 when he died. Right. So that means he only had like a, he only had like a 16-year career and was global, bro. You had to really, we'll never see that again. Yeah, we will.

Even with internet. We won't. You know why? We already are. We're missing it, though, because it ain't our generation. You know why we won't see it? I'm talking about Bob Marley type. Yeah.

Because there's too many eyeballs to share. We won't see that no more because there's so many pockets of, you know, like, you could be on TV right now and five nights a week. People don't know who the hell you are. Back in the day, if you was on TV, everybody knows who you are. You're right. Because it's too saturated. You know what I'm saying?

Like, it's so much content out there that we won't see another. Michael Jackson type. Yes, we will. I don't think so, bro. Because he's here, right? Who? So I'm saying, he was, Michael Jackson had his run. Right.

He didn't already inspire the next one. But what I'm trying to tell you is you'll be big, but I don't think you'll be global big because it's always going to be, look it, look like my man who just did a Super Bowl, Bad Bunny, right? He huge as hell. But there's a lot of people still didn't know who he was. So that's what I'm trying to tell you.

Well, it was a point. You couldn't say, Mike. Jackson if somebody would be like, who is that? But you could be bad bunny and somebody could still say, who is that? Not saying talent-wise or whatever. I'm not saying, no, no, I'm about to say. Chris Brown on that.

Still not global, I'm telling you. Chris Brown is huge. What I'm saying is it's not saying that somebody's not huge, but when I'm saying like, it's like saying Obama's, Trump. Like, certain when it comes to entertainment, it's still going to be sexes of people, I guarantee you you could go to an older

Indian lady, be like, who is Chris Brown? She'd be like, I, oh, yeah, yeah, I know. It's a difference. You know what I'm saying? And it's not a talent thing. Yeah, I get what you're saying in here. It's not a talent. It's so many, you got to share the eyeballs with so many people and the ears with so much.

There's so much content. The game is a lot more broader. It's so much content. You know what I'm saying? Like, look how many, we older. The young dudes I'd be seeing, and they be doing arenas, I'd be like, who is this? But he's got the arena filled up. I don't know who he is.

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? when we was young everybody knew j-z because we only had a few rappers out at one time it's 60 hot dudes right now like whoa I don't know who this is nigga I said what I said I'm grown

I have to acknowledge that you said that I said that right but I'm grown if you thought about dick that's on you ain't nobody saying you weren't on woe ain't nobody's done on wall with dick you don't want to warwick you don't want war with this that sounded like an ad that you was What's doing?

60 hot dude. Yeah, it's just so much, it's a lot. Not to say you can't still be Chris Brown is doing amazing, but I just don't know if we'll see like a Michael Jackson type, Bob Marley type again. I believe it's going to happen. Because the Internet just kind of like. I think that's what's happening though.

I think it's hurting. Really? Yeah, it's, it's, I'm telling you, so many pockets. of fans. Like, it's so many different, like I say, okay, back in the day, remember everybody in here, even the young dudes, know who Steve Urkel is. It was a TV show that I was on, right?

How many TV shows on right now, popping? And you'd be like, that's a dude from, I ain't never heard of that damn show. That's what I'm trying to tell you. That's the difference. It's so much content. It's so saturated. It's people that's doing well, rich as hell,

but certain pockets of the world still don't know them because it's too saturated. You're right, because this show right here, believe it or not. It was on YouTube the other day. Right. Just clicked on the profile just to see what we're doing, 85 South. How many views you think this show has gotten collectively? Over the time?

Yeah. I'm sure y'all probably hear that least 100 mil. Way more. 869 million millions. I'm saying. I'm way of a few. $1,000, 69 million. And that's crazy.

That means at least one fucking A country. One seventh of the whole fucking population of the world has watched this shit. That's what I'm saying. Somebody need to suck my dick every day.

I'm hoping my dick suck by some of the finest. The baddest. Australian dicks. Right. This is all in belly with balls. Stuff. But think about back.

in the day, if you did that on TV back in the day, you couldn't, you couldn't even go nowhere. I can't go nowhere. You wouldn't even be able, I'm just saying, you literally wouldn't be able to go nowhere. Everywhere I go, I have to do. What he didn't say? One strange person. What I'm saying is if the numbers, the 800, if you did that back in the day on TV, that boy had to have security, like, he can't go to, he can't do nothing. I can't do shit.

You know what I'm saying? I have to have security. Everywhere. All type of strange shit. All kinds of shit be happening. It should be happening. It'd probably be you, though. No, I don't.

You'd be welcome in it. Because I'm still thinking I'm like, I'm still thinking I still got that level of like mystery. But no. Even white people would be like, Carlos? Dude, that fucking dude is you, man. Fucking beer, bro. That's fucking you. Beer, dad, giveaway, bro.

Come here, man. We fucking love you, man. That's dope, though, man. Yeah, you heard that. Kind of. I mean, look, too much as good. giving much as expected, bro. I didn't know it was going to be expected like that.

Yeah, it's going to be expected, dude. Like that? Like that. Ain't nothing. Everything got a price. You want to be successful, and as an entertainer, you got to give up a little bit of your privacy. You got a lot of it.

That's the high goal. That's just high goal. That's why you got to stay on point, but. Yeah, if you want to be successful as an entertainer, your privacy is gone, bro. I know. That's why you got to be so careful with the shit that you have. Like, you know how it is comedians we used to be like, ah, you ain't shit yet.

You know how you get out. He's been to go up there. Go on put him up. Go on bomb, man. Two more bombs. You can't even be like that no more. Not really. Because I don't want to be a niggas' reason.

Right. You know what I'm saying? When they made Carlos shit on me. Right. That took me to a whole other stuff. Or it made him kill us. Carlos kills comedian. I don't want to be that, man.

You can't even bullshit no more. Yeah, I mean, but that's just the, circle of life, dog. You know what I'm saying? Success ain't, success ain't free. It's expensive. Yeah, it's expensive. It's very expensive. It comes with it, man. So a lot of people like, man, I wish I was famous. You thank that. So you having a bad day. You just trying to run in Steve Yess to grab something. But you got to take 10 pictures or you're an asshole. And you got to be a, your five-minute trip than turned to an hour. Right. Or you're an asshole. You're an asshole. You know what I'm saying? You can take a hundred of them and be like, I got to go.

Yeah, that one. That one. You're a asshole. Or you're a asshole. But he took a picture with everybody with me. It don't let it be not black. Racist. He's racist. That's why he ain't take one with me. Come on, man. I ain't supporting you no more. And he ain't dead in them but like shit.

Because sometimes people don't forget you. We're just regular people. I might be having a bad day, though. Bad enough, I'm coming to CVS. I probably need something. And you can be in there for some shit that can be just some regular shit. I might get a...

Man, who are you fucking? What the fuck? This nigga about to get some pussy. And you're on Instagram. This niggas brink in hell, y'all. He's got to lose. Hey, you're going to put your hair on. And you're married.

They got a picture of you grabbing up in the condos. Oh, my God. Now you got to go home and fuck your old lady with a rover. I just want to go back to how I used to be. This is the crazy one. I didn't want to last long. She in the car. She in the car.

It was just a lady behind you in land. And that's who they just put you with. Right. Mystery woman. What the fuck is a mystery woman? It's a mystery to me. I don't know what it is. That's the one thing, though.

But I come with it. You see how fake that shit is. They can't be an asshole no more. Man, don't believe. Nothing you hear about people on the internet. Click. Especially famous people. Oh, boy.

Yeah, they'll chop it up, clip it up, and, you know, people read headlines. They don't read articles. They don't even read the whole caption. They just read the little thing at the top. People don't read. Nah, they don't read. So, but that's the life we chose, though, Dad, that come with it. You could go get the warehouse job.

No, I couldn't. Okay. I could, but I could. I ain't going to make it to the first paper. I ain't going to make the first pay period. Can you imagine after being a comedian? All these. I've been doing comedy 21 years.

Yeah. Having to go and let a manager say something to me. When was the last day job? Shit. Like 20, 19 years? At least. Yeah. At least.

I had a bullshit job because my partner was, he put me on the payroll and all. I had to do it just come like one time. Right. So you get stuff. So you get stuff. I had to show up. Yeah.

It'd be. Go up one time. Once a week and then I get paid the whole week. It's hard, man. If you had to go back. I mean, as a grown-ass man, I'm going to do what I got to do, though. You right.

Yeah. I ain't friend to be out here on these streets. I'm going to get a job. It just sucked, though. If I had a job, I wish I could find a way to finesse a job right now. Man, you get a job. Yeah, how you just cuss? No, I'm just saying.

I'm saying like a job where it's like, I work there, but I don't be there. Right. I need a job where I'm just. You just get you a cell phone store and just be the owner. I don't want to be the owner. I want to just be getting money. I just want to show up and get money.

Yeah, that's not like prostitution. Nah, advertising. Now that's the market. Yeah. Yeah. I love money though. I know they say you're not supposed to love it, but I love money.

Yeah, but do you, you don't love $15 an hour number. Mm-mm. that need to be passive very much so yeah that needs to be stacking on the side or something I forget about that shit oh I do that's 15 oh okay

I don't know if it had to be out it had to be like by the job hey I'm Tori Webster and I host that digital take if you've ever wondered how the internet really works from influencer culture to digital marketing and pop culture this is your inside look

Each week, I share what's actually working online, the behind the scenes of building a career as a creator, and real conversations with people shaping the industry. Think of it like your big sister guide to the digital world. Follow that digital take on IHeartRadio or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jared Adano. You might know me as that loud guy who yells out, help on the internet. Help! Somebody! Please!

But there's so much more to me than me. I'm an actor. I'm a comedian. And recently, I've become quite the hell. helper myself. And on my new podcast, hope from a hypocrite, I'll be changing lives, helping people in need with my sage advice and thoughtful solutions. Sike, I'm a comedian.

I'm not qualified to give good advice. Join me and my comedian friends as we riff rant and recommend some of the most legally dubious advice known to man. If I'm calling you, even if you're on your phone, let it ring twice. One ring is too scary. Oh, cream of chicken suit. Cream a chicken suit. This is Help from a Hypocrite,

the worst advice from the dumbest people you know. Listen to Help from Hypocrite as part of the Mike Cultura podcast network available on the IHart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're watching the latest season of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, you already know there's a lot to break down. Gorsha accusing Kelly of sleeping with a merry man. They holding Kay Michelle back from fighting Drew.

Pinky has financial issues. I like the bougie style of Housewives show. I think it looks like it's going to be interesting. On the podcast, Reality with the King, I, Carlos King, recap the biggest moments from your favorite reality shows, including the Real Housewives franchise, the drama, the alliances, and the team everybody's talking about. As an executive producer in reality television,

I'm not just watching it. I understand the game. As somebody who creates shows, I'll even say this. At the end of the day, when people are at home, they want entertainment. To hear this and more, listen to Reality with the King on the IHard Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, I'm Deanna Maria Riva, actress, mother, lover,

and a Gen X woman walking through life one hot flash and hormonal crying jag at a time. You ladies know what I mean. I'll bet you a perimenopausal chin here you do. So let's talk about it. Join me on my new podcast, How Hard Can It Be with Deanna Maria Riva, where I call on my GenX squads from Ohio to Hollywood. as we navigate midlife's most fantastic BS.

All of a sudden, I'd had hanginess happening on my own. I was like, what the hell is that? I was married when I had her, so I didn't even consider how empty that nest was going to be. Mood swings, night sweats, fupas, sex drive. Wait, what sex? Dating at 45. How can it be getting naked at 50 with the new guy? That one's kind of hard, no.

Well, that's lighting. They say we can't polish a turd, but we're sure going to try. So let's get blunt with laughs, tears or tears of laughter, and dive into it unfiltered and unbothered and ask, How Hard Can It Be? I cannot believe I'm about to say this out loud in public. Listen to How Hard Can It Be with Diana Maria Riva as part of My Cultura Podcast Network available on the Iheart radio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. It's expensive being the owner. And you've got to deal with too many people. Yeah. Well, you work harder when you got your own business. Because you actually have to work. You got to watch over it. Yeah.

Because you leave your business other people's hands. You fuck. This ain't they dream. They don't go to fuck. Yeah, this is your dream. You know how you're acting on a job. Exactly.

Because I know I'm going to go out and do that bad. Right. That's the scary. This is your dream, dog. I'm not for to bust my ass to make your dream come true. Right. So you got to work hard. But you can't like fuck the game up because you know how life be.

Right. Like people are going to be, man, I was sick. Okay. Right. You can't just fine. Yeah, you're sick. Nick, I see you, I don't laugh me, but you're sick. I was sick,

who am I to fuck up human history? These are the best last told to a job. Right. But people do get sick, though. I know. And if you're a good worker... But you know when the nigga, a nigga ain't going to be sick every day. But if you're a good worker, you get rid of them, you don't know what you're going to get. Right. People actually go to work sick.

When they call in, they don't be sick. I had a math teacher tell me that in college. I ain't never called in sick. He was like, whenever I'm sick, I go to work, and I let them see me sick, then they sent me home. Now I ain't had to use none of my sick days. Exactly.

He said, but when I feel good, I take off and I go to the beach and I enjoy myself. Right. I was like, damn, that makes sense. Because he's like, if you're sick, then you home, you ain't even enjoying being off. Yeah.

He said, go to work and be sick. What the fuck I would. If you fall out, fall out on their time. Yeah. Yeah, people would be full of shit, man. Have to do with all that. But when you get a good employee, you hold on because you don't want to know how I turn over.

That's a fast. If you get a good worker, you probably had to fire them a couple times, but as long as they work. You want to keep them. Because you don't want to get a good worker, bro. Man, if you ever had to hire people, you will understand this shit. Sometimes people be so full of shit, but they work so good. The work be so fucking excellent that you'll deal with them. Like, all right, I know this motherfucker is going to work hard for about three months and get on their bullshit.

I'm going to fire their ass, and then they're going to call them and say it. And you can time again. Long he's down still, nothing or fuck nothing up. Make them. How many people you fired? Shit. Hundreds. Fired a lot of people?

They fire themselves. They fired themselves. I like that. Because you let them know, look, this is what it's expected. Sometimes people do something so fucking flagrant and obvious. It's just like, what else could I possibly do? You left me no choice. You were fired yourself.

Yeah. If I don't fire you, everybody's going to look at me crazy. I gotta find you, bro. Yeah. Yeah, it happens. Hey man, sometimes motherfuckers ain't who you think they are. I ain't gonna say their name, but we had somebody working for us. And we was on our way to the airport one morning after the show.

Like, we were catching the flight. The motherfucker's going up to the rental car. You know how the rental car shit, like when you go up, like if you, um, I don't know what the shit calls. It's like, spiral. down there. This shit had a sign that said, no trucks. But you know, this motherfucker stopped and start backing up. And just told a hole. No. I said, what are you doing? He said, that sign said, no trucks.

I'm like, you mother, they mean, like, semi-trucks. Put this motherfucker up in there and turn these cats. Oh, y'all in the SUV? Yes. That's a laugh at that? They can't do. You can't have anybody like like. You see how they're laughing because they know exactly who the fuck I'm talking about. Who's doing?

So he's not here no more? Nope. Yeah. Yeah. Better save the sorry, though. Hey, man. No, hell, hell, long. I'd rather be sorry than stupid.

Yeah. Because you know good and damn well they ain't talking about no fucking four wheels on. Hey, I don't even know how I want to be. I fuck safe and sorry. Both of them are a sad state to be in. I'd rather be happy. I rather know what the hell I'm doing. Right.

Yeah. Mm-hmm? Shit happens. Sometimes people just want you to take the blame for the shit. Ain't nothing wrong with saying sorry for some shit you ain't got shit to do with. Sometimes if that's what it take to get out the situation, I just say it. Even I don't mean it. Yeah, I'm too old. Yeah, sometimes, especially if you, with a woman, I just, you're right.

You know the best part about becoming an older nigger, especially where you're dealing with women. You don't never have to tell your side of the story. They're going to tell it. They can make it up. Yeah. And then, like, the worst they make you in a story, the better. And that's what it is. Because I'm holding on, like, your side of the story like the big joker.

Oh, I ain't shit. Okay, bet. I did what? Okay. All right, now. I don't make me, I wouldn't do you like this. But if you keep pushing my button. When it comes to argue with women, man, that's a young man's game.

I guess they think that some shit you're just supposed to forget. I ain't arguing with no woman. You got it. All right. I ain't shit. I did it. You right. Because if she's, if it's in her head, it's true.

I got a hit. It ain't worth. If she think it is true. We're not going to act like my friend didn't just. try to open up to us about some woman putting her hands on him. Somebody put hands on you? Damn. See, they don't never want to hit the black man.

You had it coming? She beat the hell out of him. No, I ain't that graphic. She looked at your ass. They ain't that graphic. I'm trying to act like you was tough. That girl had you. I wasn't tough.

I remember that. I called the police on. Yeah, because you know you got your ass beat when you called the police. They'll call the police on us. I like to see them. They're never coming. He took it? He took it to jail?

No, I ain't do it. I say I will do it. Oh, great. I ain't never called me. So she just slapped you? Uh-uh, uh-uh. I wish that was it. Oh, she really went in.

Yeah. Not for no shit like that. Well, she caught you? No. It was just a argument. Damn. I was like, all right, you got it. I don't know this shit.

You called the police on your girl? No, I ain't do it. I said, I will. Next time. Not my girl, but if a woman hitting on me or some shit like that, yeah, I called the police. I ain't never did it, but I will. I would.

Oh, I definitely called. I FaceTime the police. Just how this bitch look. Damn. Just in case y'all still down the street. The first time? First time, yeah. It depends on what it is.

No, bro. Man, he'd be with knives and shit, bro. You hit me, you go into jail, bro. I'm calling the police. When it'll be using knives and shit, bro, I got them. Because if I let her hit me once, you're going to do it again, Carlos. I just know it'd take a long time for the police to get there about two hours. Y'all be that made up by then and beat a bit.

It's a big pulled up and hit me in front of my grandma one time. Wait, so wait a minute now, this is another bitch. Like, it's you. It might be you, bro. Yeah. In my mouth. I got a boy. My mouth.

Wait a minute. He's like, this is your second one. What'd you be saying? Don't stop saying that. Hey, I'll be watching this nigger story. I know exactly what are you talking about. This nigga posted. What is?

You think it was either the day or yesterday. That nigger was like, this don't text me good morning. Oh. And as a comedian, I know this a show. So you know what happened. Little bitch ain't come. He's going through it, then text him good boy.

He's hot. He got hot. Tossed up goodwill. He was supposed to be good night. Ah! Man. That's the worst. So you be going on. That's your problem.

You think it and you said. You're still going through it. Like you said, he ain't an old nigga yet. Yeah, he still got energy to do that. Man, what? Once you get old, you're going to like, you got it. Man, sometimes it be hard to hold shit in. But that's because you still got energy in you like that.

Wait till you get older, you're gonna be like, man, I just want to be alone. I don't want to do all that. Yeah, especially if a sure thing, you'd be like, no, I'm just gonna go to bed. Yeah, like, I'm not in the heart giving it to your ass. Hell no. You ain't gonna win, and if you win, you're gonna get beat up like you? Yeah, I don't want to be. I don't want to be alone.

Sometimes I turn down some pussy because I know I got to stay up too late to get it. For real. You ever had the one where... We're too late, but she gonna fuck, buddy. She gonna want to do all this goofy shit. I ain't. Went too late. right now in my life

two cut off me too that's wrong that's wrong that's why I've been I've been sleep

about four hours but I'm saying I wake back up at two to get the because see I get up at six though so I'm asleep by two I wake back up yeah I'm not

I see you're still younger than me I ain't waking back up I'm going to three I go to sleep and then wake up once I'm sleep I don't want no fuss I'm sleep I'm gonna get back up if I didn't get to sleep early

I'm asleep if I don't get up you the bathroom, yeah. Nah, see. That motherfucker right. Yeah, I don't even put the lights on because I don't want to wake up. See, I just go through the bathroom. Yeah. Yeah, I'm... You still out with you. You young.

I'm 38? Yes, this young man right here. I'm 43. Yeah, you're young. You're out here. You outside. You probably want to do it twice in one night. Oh. You. See, I do...

Younger. Yeah, yeah. Twice? You're doing it. Today? Yeah. Like, if you're gonna get there alone, is another nigga coming over here? I really, it ain't gotta be back to back. I do twice a day, but it ain't gotta be-

came out to back to back. Yeah, yeah, I gotta lay down. Yeah, yeah, I gotta lay down. If it was good, I'm gonna lay down. Yeah. But if it ain't really hitting on shit, I might put my shoes back on. Yeah, I gotta go.

I don't like when it ain't good. Who does? It just, I don't know. I don't know. I look at it. I'm like, it explains so much. You don't risk it all for nothing, for average. Yeah.

I ain't risk it in there no more. You ever had some pussy so, like, not even bad, just regular that it don't even count. You know what it is though for me? The most... You never counted, it's like, nah, they don't care. You know the part that make it like, but make it boring to me for me, it's the moaning. I ain't, bitch, that just breed hard. Like, bitch, say something.

Like, I'm bored. You keep this gangst ass pussy out. Yeah, I'm bored as air. Like, like, wait too gangsters to me. Just breathing hard. Like, no, say stung. I'm like, bitch, let it out. I need that soundtrack.

That's a bitch laughing me one time. Dang. That's terrible. God damn. That's the bitch you should have fought. That's why I don't talk during sex. That why I don't talk during sets no more. You're saying something crazy?

You know, I was, you know, I was just, I'm in that talk, you know what I'm saying? You did the set. I mean, that bit, biting my lip and everything. This d'clock. I fucked around and said, mm-hmm, that bitch said, the fuck you giggling thought i thought about thumb bitch why you thank you first of all you're able to need thank you right now i'm in you i was i went flasic get a bitch this bitch think about that's why i left my sports bra

bitch i'm talking about you know you think you doing something you say mm-hmm let me say fuck you giggling that bitch bitch said i thought about sir you're supposed to be thinking about You're old-end man in the pussy. They're like, mm-hmm. What's what you doing? So you're going to talk with her? Nothing saying no. Oh, shit, like, mm-mm-mm.

You're talking. The dirty talk shit only works if you guys. Because the first time somebody said, huh, it's fucked up. Oh, yeah. What you say? Yeah. Oh, you said, fuck these. Okay.

He said, mm-hmm, this nigga answered the question. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Like I said, mm-hmm. Like I just feel like, yeah, this, yeah, that's what you wanted, right? That big. Yeah. Giggling that.

Yeah, you can't repeat your sex shit. That shit, yeah, it's kill a moment. Where they ride home with fuck though? I had to go fuck something else. You have to make it up. You have to make it up. Yeah, I gotta go goddamn. It's like, if you're bummed, you're like,

I gotta go do another room. I can't go to another room. I can't go home like this. I can't go cross-line to do another room right quick. Like, shit. I can't go on like this. Because I don't mean shit. I know I'm funny and shit.

This girl asked me what's supposed to good and I had a condom on. I have no idea. It could be. I mean, it's got the possibility. It's warm. All the hell of this are there. You feel.

I don't have something you can tell with that rub on. That's one you know. Now, you can tell. Stay away from it. You can tell with the rubber on it. That thing like that, you can tell you. You can tell me like, boy, if this rubber isn't on, you'll be mad because I'd have nutted already. It's going to be an argument.

I've been in love with it for nine years. Sometimes that condom will help you, though. He'll give her extra 15, 10 minutes. That raw? Remember the first raw? Nick, your first time going on raw, that bitch was quick. Quick. Ain't no, nigga.

What was that? You all right? No, miss. That's what that? Come on, bro. Come on, man. Ain't nobody ever went wrong. First time did 20 minutes.

You are a lot. No. You are a lot, bro. Your first time raw. Your body got to give you. My first time, raw was missionary too. Out of there, dog. You ain't even feeling coming.

It's just like, ugh. Like, God damn. First couple time. Hold up. Hold up. You got to learn your body. You got to learn your body. You got to make the see like, man, man, you got one on you.

Hey. Damn. That shit right there. That's a shit right there. That's, I mean, my first. Nick, that big was bad. I don't know if I made a minute. Damn.

I don't know. In. You were thinking about that. Yeah. You was in that jack. I was also 16, nigga. I ain't know how to, I ain't know my body. Yeah, you jackraper that sit.

Yeah. I ain't know that. You don't slow stroke at all this. You don't slow stroke at all this shit. You're just going there jackrabbit. Just beat the pussy all of. Then in the cup of next day, I was like, hey, man, I'm put a rubber.

It's like, we already went wrong. Hey, if you want this shit to last, if you want to have another argument, okay, I'll go wrong. I had my brother, my brother older to me. He'll tell me shit like, you got to beat your dick off before you go over there. You go with this shit. Well, all right, cool.

They don't want my goddamn advice. I don't know what. If you're going to do all that, I ain't going. If I got to do all that, I got to jack off before I get over there. What am coming over that for? That is an old trick, though. I'm telling you. Tell me that shit.

But you can't do that in your older age because you ain't getting back up. You ain't getting back up, nigga. You're done. You sleep. Yeah. You're gonna sit on the head. Yeah, you're like I was gonna come over there.

Ain't no point now. I already did it. I already took care. I catch you Winston. Yeah. Ain't I'm gonna say this money for this dinner and all that. So gas.

You call your senses out of you nut. Oh, nigga. You don't, you like, I don't even like her. Quick. You fuck offending to go over there and get her this $100 for her. I don't know. about her goddamn day.

After you get some pussy, you start noticing shit you ain't never seen. I don't like her ankles. Yeah. Back of her feet, man, maybe you ever thought

you was in love to you nut it? You thought you loved it? You're like, nah, I don't like her like that, though. I don't like it like that. I thought I did.

Yeah, that realization. Yeah. I thought I liked, though. Yeah. It got to be a balance, though. Yeah. What do you mean? Think about it.

Like you said, if you didn't date it and actually played along in the game and had the weight on it and then that shit ain't hit like it was supposed to hit. That ain't the best, like you had to do too much work for too little. So it's over with it. It's over with it. You ever like one before you even hit? That'd be the dangerous one. You'd be like, nigga, I like her as we. Yeah.

Yeah. Like, like. Yeah. When the pussy's just like a little garnish. I'm saying you didn't even hit it at all. He's like, niggas. I already like her. If this pussy is good, I'm in trouble.

But what if it ain't? It usually be good, though. Because what happens is mentally because you like the person. It's good anyway. You're going to make it, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. If you like the person. Now, if you don't like her, then it's like that shit.

But if you like the person. One time this girl gave me some pussy so good, I went and got her water, and we was at her house. I had never been in her refrigerator before. You want to walk? Yeah. This ain't your house. Did you at least get yourself one?

No, I didn't. You just wanted to make sure she was hydrated. She was hydrated. That's all right. Yeah, man. Hey man, welcome back to the 85th show. Yeah. Yeah.

Yes, indeed. This year is starting out for great. Shout out to my boy. My boy named them sent me there. You don't know anything about that, man. I see what is it? My boy, Nile. You're boarding them?

Okay, that's what it said. Yeah, yeah. That's dope. Because the nigger came up on me, he said, guess who got a closing line, nigga? I said who? Your boy in them. No.

My boy, Sebo out of Nashville. He's a comedian. He's a comedian. Yeah, I think I know Sebo. You do know that big strong-ass-ass-ass-ass-haired. Right here. A nigga look like security and comedian. Yeah.

He is on security. This nigga, like Six-Bo. Big-a-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Yeah, I know Seibo. Shout out to Sebo. I ain't never met a little Sebo. Some names be big. Like, you ain't going to meet no little-ass C-Bow.

I guess the letter in the front do make it different. Yeah. If you made a nigga named Bo, he probably is a big country-ass-ass. You ain't going to mean no low-ass-bo. Even Bodecious. Comedian Baudacious. Not a Virginia big nigga. Yeah.

Some names, the nigger, if they tell you like, hey, nigger C-Boe looking for you, you need to ask questions. C-Bode? How he said it. B-B-B-B. You know what I'm saying? Was he mad? Z-Bot. But if they tell you Deontaine, you look, you're like, man, fuck Deontay, niggins.

You're fucked by no Deontaine? Every hood got one nigga that can't fight that's always in one. But them niggas is dangerous, though, because they're not scared to lose. But no, that fight in regards, they don't care about losing. They record's so tarnished. They're like, I don't get fucked. Sometimes it's just about to fight. It's just he liked to fight.

He don't care. Sometimes you've got a fight to get your respect. It ain't about if you win or lose. I got to let them up up. Oh, yeah, come. You know, it's crazy. When you were young, it was only about winning. When you get to a certain age, you realize, like, I ain't got to win, but you ain't

going to fun me, nigga. Right. You can whoop my ass, but you're going to have to whip my ass. You're not just going to punk me. Right. And most of the time, nigga be like, man, I don't hear. Even if you lose the fight, I think the objective of the fight. It's to fight.

It's to make sure that it's at least not an easy fight. Not an easy win. Right. Because the nigg going to be like, I won, but I don't want to fight. that nigga again. Right. It wasn't no, because he'd rather not fight.

Right. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm scared? Yeah, every fight I ever had, I was scared. You're supposed to be. But I fought,

but I was, nigga, I ain't never going to a fight super confident. Like, I know I got it. You never know what the other one is going to. Like, I ain't never going to fight.

They're really confident. I know I got this, nigga. I was always like. They really confident. Like, what this motherfucker studied? Because you don't know what they're gonna do.

You think it's just gonna be some punches and some, no. These motherfuckers and put your ass on in. You don't know. They might grab your nuts. You don't know where they line is at. There's no rules. There's no rules. I know to grab the nuts first.

It's a fight. You don't know who this thing is. No, it's a fight. You can't really. Yeah, you ain't in the rain. There ain't no rules. There ain't no rules. There ain't no rules.

That's why, like, sometimes people like, somebody like oh the nigger ain't gonna do shit to me i don't know about that i could say if he do something i'm gonna retaliate but i can't say a nigga ain't gonna slap me i ain't got no control of him right he might slap me but the ain't gonna stop there but i'd never be like nigger ain't gonna do you don't know what niggum do that's what i do when i walk in the room i start looking for shit that i might have to hit somebody like just like right now some shit popped off i feel sorry for whoever you got this candle you got this can't whacks throwing all of the shit I'm gonna grab this and wipe a nigga down with some bleach.

All in his eye, yeah. Jump on his neck, nigga. It's a fight, it's over with it. It's a fight. I'm gonna get fired their ass up from right here. Straight to the nigga eyes. I'm saying, bullshit.

We're gonna give them three of them. Fap, five, fuck, fuck. Wrong studio, bitch. I'm gonna break this ruler in half and stab a nigga with 13 in a half. Yeah, 13 in the quarter, nigga. That's a shame, though. I was locked up one time and seen a niggins show off in a toothbrush. I was like, oh my God, more hurry up and get down here.

Celebrate your pride with the station that's as bold, vibrant, and diverse as you are. IHart Pride Canada. From dance anthems to pop icons and hits from 2S LGBTQ plus Canadian artists. It's the soundtrack that keeps life loud and proud. Just ask your smart speaker to play IHart Pride Canada. Stream us on your phone or listen now at iHartRadio.com. Come together, celebrate love. Pride.

Feel it all year long. Let's go. With I heart pride Canada. Hey, I'm Jared Adano. You might know me as that loud guy who yells out, help on the internet. Help! Somebody, please! But there's so much more to me than me.

I'm an actor. I'm a comedian. And recently, I've become quite the helper myself. And on my new podcast, Hope from a Hippocrite, I'll be changing lives. Helping people in need with my sage advice and thoughtful solutions. Psych! I'm a comedian! I'm not qualified to give good advice! Join me and my comedian friends as we riff, rant, recommend some of the most legally dubious advice known to man. If I'm calling you, even if you're on your phone, let it ring twice. One ring is too scary.

Oh, cream a chicken suit. Hey, cream. Cream a chicken suit. This is Help from a Hypocrite, the worst advice from the dumbest people you know. Listen to Help from a Hypocrite as part of the My Cultura. Podcast Network available on the IHartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're watching the latest season of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, you already know there's a lot to break down. Gorsha accusing Kelly of sleeping with a merry man. They holding Kay Michelle back from fighting Drew. Pinky has financial issues.

I like the bougie style of Housewives show. I think it looks like it's going to be interesting. On the podcast, Reality with the King, I, Carlos King, Recon, the biggest moments from your favorite reality shows, including the Real Housewives franchise, the drama, the alliances, and the team everybody's talking about. As an executive producer in reality television, I'm not just watching it. I understand the game.

As somebody who creates shows, I'll even say this. At the end of the day, when people are at home, they want entertainment. To hear this and more, listen to Reality with the King on the IHard Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get. your podcast. Hey, I'm Deanna Maria Riva, actress, mother, lover, and a Gen X woman walking through life

one hot flash and hormonal crying jag at a time. You ladies know what I mean. I'll bet you a perimenopausal chin here you do. So let's talk about it. Join me on my new podcast. How hard can it be with Deanna Maria Riva, where I call on my Gen X squads from Ohio to Hollywood as we navigate midlife's most fantastic BS. All of a sudden, I'd had hanginess happening on my own.

I was like, what the hell? is that? I was married when I had her, so I didn't even consider how empty that Ness was going to be. Mood swings, night sweats, fupas, sex drive. Wait, what sex? Dating at 45. How hard can it be? Getting naked at 50 with the new guy. That one's kind of hard. Well, that's lighting. They say we can't polish a turd, but we're sure going to try. So let's get blunt with laughs, tears, or tears of laughter, and dive into it, unfiltered and unbothered and ask, how hard can it be? I cannot believe I'm about to Say this out loud in public. Listen to How Hard Can It Be with

Diana Maria Riva as part of My Cultura Podcast Network available on the IHart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. You're just going to sneak in there that you was locked up long enough for that type of shit to have. No, well, anytime. Here at hell. They put me in the room with this on bitch.

What do you do? See, I told him, like, look, you can go get this shit because I ain't going to be here. My folk come to get me. So he went through the little bag and seen the toothbrush that game. Yeah, he just went to shop on the bitch on the ground while we were talking. Oh, he just made a shame. Yeah, I didn't catch on what he,

I thought it was some shit that they do further that just, like, knock some shit off before they use it. But then I seen, I'm not used to the check. Then I seen the end getting real narrow, like a toothpick or some shit. You're like, oh. I can gave this bitch a weapon in the world.

I don't chaid this nigga, my sight. Bole next to white head pack your shit. You can have out of it. I'm out of hell. Yeah, I don't do the jail. I didn't do it, but. I had to go for what I did. You did it.

Hey, man, it's a fucked up place, boy. You been? Yeah. How mean you saying? You know, they don't just pull your name out of hat when you go to jail? Not a lot of times. Not a lot of times.

Not a lot of times. Just enough to get the point. Yeah, just dumb shit. I didn't go to jail for, suspended. Yeah, booed shit. I didn't know my license was suspended for you. That's a big, that's a rookie cop.

Going to jail. Like, no. But at least I had been before, so it wasn't the first time. Right. I was like, God damn, this is, you know, just minor shit. Not long enough to the actual weather out. You'll be out the next day.

Oh, shit. As long as you go to, they eat outfit as soon as you get up. I had got locked up one time on some don't. One time. God damn, the guy, I'm inside you been glad to be the jail. Don't, don't. He'll be slapped by bitches and a couple of days. Oh, you go a lot.

No, I went a lot. See, I'm going to tell you this time I had, see. He said this time. You know, I used to, I used to watch other dope boys in the guys. game, do shit. And I was like, all right, I'm gonna try it. So I decided I was gonna take these two crap bitches to the mall to steal me some Cologne out of there

because they used to steal for everybody else. So they don't win inside of that day and got caught. They job was to go get the fucking tester off the direct and come on the body of that. They don't have got caught. So I'm sitting out there in the damn parking lot, like, what in the fuck? Right.

So my stupid ass walks in the store. Look for. Right. They don't told the damn lost prevention That I was You will Then I don't send them in now Right

So when I don't see them I said fuck it off with the walk out They gotta find the right home Damn lost prevention standing by the door That's not a charge on you though Huh? You ain't do nothing Well they know they looked at the camera scene

That we got out the same car But you still ain't do nothing Right I beat it though Right But they locked my ass up For the moment You should have to go jail

I'm told them You're stupid for going in there I know it But hey If they wouldn't Because I don't know how Craig is operating If they weren't back in two minutes, I would have drove up. Yeah.

I brought them to them all, 45 minutes from house. You're that thirsty for some Cologne. And you said, you should have just bought it. Right. What the fuck wrong with you? Dumb shit.

Dump shit. Bought it mad off. No, hell no. Hell no. Hell no. Had that motherfuckies in there still in Jupin. Eternity and shit. Let's get to us in Cologne.

Yeah. You could just fuck the shit. Just stupid-ass shit. I had no been to doing no while I got in trouble. You should have went. You needed learning lessons. Niggins. Oh, fuck all that, man.

I ain't even finished introducing my guest today, man. This is one of my real play-up partners, man. I've been knowing this nigga by 20 years. Yeah, we go way back. Then a motherfucker all the way from Miami, none other than Malik. What's up, bro? Yeah, man. Way back, man.

I saw it. I saw it from the beginning. You know what I'm saying? So I'm proud of you, brother. Appreciate it, man. I see you go from young boy to, well, 800 million views. 869 to be exact. What bitch is on my side and bitches on my back?

Yeah, we're about to hit a billion on these motherfuckers. We're about to hit a billion. And you're about to be part of it. Yes, sir. Working, man, you know, getting prepared to take my daughter to college, doing the father stuff. You know what I'm, man. Yeah. That's magnificent.

Yes, sir. You know. You know what it is. You got one more year, you see it. One more year. One more year. Yeah, boy. So I'm about to drop my daughter off to Texas Southern.

That's what's up, man. You know what I'm saying? So just working, man. TSU. TSU, man. HBCU. So my daughter was like she's been around white people her whole school years.

Okay. She wanted to get some black experience. That's real, some, real black. I'm hoping she'll be like, okay, Daddy, this is too black. I got to go. She might do it once a mess and be like, I got it. I'm cool. Okay.

So we'll see what happens, though. I think she's gonna like it. You're gonna like it. She's gonna like it. Cause she still be around her family. So she's no black people. He ain't like we removed. You know, I ain't got that kind of.

But you know it's the HBCU. Yeah, it's different. You might not be used to the ghetto shit. That's what I'm, that's because you're my daughter, the Valley girl in California. Right. You don't know about even like running in the dorm room and shit. She, she knows a little bit because of her cousins and stuff. Okay.

But I think she's gonna be all right. All right. But you need that experience. She needs that. No, she definitely need that. You know, so what I told her, go to HBCU, and if you go to grad school, then you go to a PWI. So then you get the best of both worlds.

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm bald, don't you? Yeah. Yeah. He's doing track right now for the first time. Fast. No, he's jumping.

High jump in the long jump. He just won his first place this past weekend on the long jump. Yeah. Then your son began pussy off of you? Absolutely. Probably. Absolutely. He's 17.

He's got to be 18. He's a little bit. Yeah. You know who my daddy is, right? That's how you're doing. You know what my daddy is? He don't do that. Yeah, because they don't see you like the same.

What? Six, what? Six, three, six, two. He's about five, six, five, six, six. That's tall as shit. Well, you're still in six six? That's tall as shit. God, damn.

You ain't got to tell them about who your dad is. You're tall. They already fantasizing. When you're that tall. The mama tall. You ain't got to. Mama talk. My kids talk to me. The things we do for our kids, man.

Yeah. But now, man, we just been out here, you know, doing things, working. Yeah. That's all it is, man. Just to be a blessing to still be in this business. Yeah. It's long. What, 21? I'm 26. 21. I'm 26, man. Long time, dog. You know what I'm? Ain't have a day job.

I can't. In 20, 26, so a 22 year. So 22 years. Damn. Yeah, that's crazy, man. When you look up, you be like, damn, boy, I've been doing this thing a long time. Hell yeah. It fly by, bro.

It fly by, how long? You're young, right? 14. I've been doing 14, yeah. You know it's crazy when somebody been doing 14, and you look at him like, yeah, you're okay, young boy, you're doing it. 14 is a long time. Yeah. That's how long I knew him, though, since he moved up in and started fucking with it.

Yeah. That's a long time, too. But yeah, man. So it's a blessing, man, to still be. Still be funny, too. Yeah. Still be funny. You've been funny the whole time.

A lot of people ain't been funny the whole time. You know, there's a few of us been funny the whole time as we came in and just never dropped off. See, that's the way you know we're really supposed to be doing this shit, though. Right. Because we still love it, too. Because think about all this shit in the world, though. This is what we do the best.

Right. Remember with your first Instagram, or by your used to me. They do come in it. I am coming. I am. I live this shit. Yeah.

In real life. It'd be so funny, like, when you start seeing your jokes come to life. Like a joke that you told, then you see it in real fucking life, or see it in real life, and it just keep reoccurring, it become normal. Yeah. Man. The best jokes, though, for me, is the ones that be true. The one that I don't have to really make up, but I just put a little something on it.

That's when you become, to me, a true comedian when you just pulling from your self, you're not just grabbing stuff out of blue sky. And that material would be relatable. Because it'd be true. And the audience really fuck with you. Right. And they could feel like that you, for real. Like, oh, he really did get beat up by a girl. Even if it ain't funny, funny, it's relatable.

And that's why they're gonna laugh at it. And that's just... That girl beat the hell out of him. Was it a big girl? Uh-uh. A little small one? I'm fucking. But you just, you were just being a man.

I'm gonna say- though. Oh, that's fucked up. No, that's because he, you couldn't, you can't even say that. Right like that. Because if the black man, bruh, a big girl has something to do with you still being alive right now. I'm talking about fighting while. I don't fuck with big girls.

They're gonna beat me up. I'm saying. You made it sound like you don't deal with him. No, he was saying that like, fighting while, like, the big girl beat me up. No, I'm not going to fuck with them. I know I can't beat no big girl up. Big women are important in any man's life. I don't fuck miss women before.

I didn't do it recently. But I've done it before. Think about the motherfuckers who believe in you. All mamas are big. Big girls, your big-ass aunties, your big-ass first-grade teaching. Big-ass lunch ladies. Skinny women ain't help at all. Big women, y'all.

Really the backbone of the blackboard of a black community is a big woman? And they can sing. All big. That's why I was saying. Big people make better singers. I don't give a fuck, man. I ain't never met a big girl that can sing. Fuck that.

that man they got to bring back big singers yeah we need look yeah we need ever since we ain't had no big singers man all our music genres then went down we're supposed to have one fat ass rapper at least and one fat ass rm b nigger yeah that's always been in the song who's the last that rn b nigger roob stutter nope yeah yeah i guess i mean it's probably a couple we just don't they're not commercialized because fat niggas can sing too yeah they did one They say too. Oh, yeah. But he's like reggae, right?

Okay. But he ain't no singer, though. A fat, yeah, yeah. Rod wave? Fat niggins are supposed to do two things. They're supposed to sing real good, and they're supposed to be sweating. I prefer my singers to be big people, bigger people.

Yeah, we got to think about it. On the hefty side. You ain't got to do all that jumping around at the concert. Might move one or two times, but you pretty much just sing them goddamn song. Yeah, a couple more. We need some Jill Scots. No, you got to think about it.

When she came out. Kennedy Price was big? When she came out. Big Kelly? Yeah. Like Big Luther? Yep. Yeah.

Barry White. Ain't that wrong with big people? I don't know. I didn't say it was wrong with her. I'm not fend to fight them motherfuckers because they're wrong. Because all they got to do is grab you and fall forward. That's what I'm, that too. I don't think about that.

How good you can fight. If they get a hold to you and just fall forward. There's some big pretty women. Like, I don't snuck over there a few times. And I'm thinking that I was the choice until I found out. They sneaking me over there like they embarrassed. I'm the sad thing. You find out when it's over with and they get your ass on a body.

They're like, come on, you got to go. I got them go. You got to get out of hell. They stand to find a man coming down. I'm not going to lay up in this big comfortable-ass bid with your nigger's ass. I got a fat nigga. And hold them big-ass titty, but I got to leave. All right, dude.

My dude, fatty, he's coming through. You got to get your little ass out of it, man. Before he see this little ass, your little friend in the big. Look, it ain't been recent, but I don't have me a few. For real? Spous to cup, big one. Yeah, yeah. They like people.

Like, you slim and tall, too? Yeah. They cheat too much. Y'all look like the number 10 standing next to each other. Look, that's all right. Yeah. That's why we all stand next to each other. I just go on the road though.

You don't understand how many niggas that they actually get. A lot of. Oh, that. Oh, they be getting dick. And they head be the best. They get dick. They get the best. Huh?

They get niggas. That's what I'm saying. They have niggas lined up. I don't care how big shit is somebody knocking it down. They head be the best. Somebody knocking that down. Don't care how big shit, bro. Don't get it twisted.

I don't know what it is. But my big head came from a... On a healthier side. Ooh. Yeah. Yeah. What's that big girl store called? Lane Bryant.

I'm talking about she makes you feel like you ain't got a little. That's the big girl store. You go to Lane Brian. That's what I'm. I walk past. Just be in there, act like, yeah, get you on. They get a plus-ass model.

Oh, yeah, nigga. If you want a big girl, go to Lane Bryant. I walk past Lane Bryant in the mall, boy. Asher Stewart, too. Asher Stewart, too. I saw that billboard up in the window. It was a black lady with some curly hair with a bra with some big ass tits.

I was like, boy, y'all, you're going to take this shit down. This shit too sexy. I might walk up in that motherfucker. Is she in there? God damn. Is she real? That's a lot of titty.

So Loz, you used to like that J.C. Pen in the catalog back in the day with the women modeling the bra's out, man. Um, I've seen it. I've seen it. The year's catalog. The Christmas catalog. The J.C. Penning Christmas shit. That way they were built. They used to have all this shit in our then.

They used to have all the shit they sold in. You know, when I first ordered something out that catalog, I thought I was a genius. They had a finger hood. I was old enough to have a JC Pinnockard, though. Jason Penner, I ain't that. Let me tell you what I had. I don't know if it was up here.

It's called Burdines. It was in Florida. It was like a Macy's. And then they closed down. We had Parisians. We had Macy's working now. Parisians. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, and then what came? Was it Dillards or Masons? What took that over? I think Macy's. Because we had Gafers one point. Yeah, I don't know none of that. Gafers and then Dillers, I think Dillers bought. Where you from originally?

South Georgia, the Sola, Georgia, yeah. Yeah, we had, we had Burdons, Dillers. Y'all always had a Dillers? No, let me go on. Because it wasn't even no Macy's. We had the Berdin's. We didn't even have Macy. Damn, yeah.

Hey, man, people always talk about, like, the comedy, like climate changing and like people- I hear that all the time, Doug. Are you scared of getting canceled that shit like that? I'm not because I realize, dude, the people who want to cancel you, they weren't rocking with you. They won't fuck with you in there.

They weren't rocking with you in it. Because people who mess with you, even if they'd be a little upset, they'd be like, all right, whatever, you know what I'm saying? You got to do something real fucked up. You got to mess with kids. You got to do some, yeah. You know what I'm saying?

You got to do some fucked up shit. Other than that, they rock with you, they fuck with you. They're like, I don't fuck with that. That cancel culture, I think people give it power if they buy into it. Because if you just be like, fuck you, it's over. You want to rock it with me anyway. How many of my shows you came to? How many things you do I support?

Most of the people canceling you, what they canceling for is the one thing they saw. They ain't even know you or never supported you anyway. So I don't buy into that. Women too. You fuck with women and kids. You fucked up. I don't even know about no women, depending. There be some people losing some shit

that I'm fucking with women. I mean, you could lose some, but I don't know if you're going to... And also, I think the bigger thing is if you're not a corporate guy, if you don't have corporate sponsors, you can't be canceled. Now, if you got corporate people backing you,

you could be canceled. They're going to pull quick. They're going to pull. But if you just... Look at Chappelle. What they're going to do? People still going to line up. What shit?

He's so hot. People want to fuck with him, though. But what I'm just saying is, but he still don't do sponsor stuff. Right, right, right, right. Because he ain't trying to be walking no fine lines.

That's what I'm saying, but the show's still going to be sold out. Right. Because I don't need Pepsi's money. I don't need this money. I'm getting the money from the people. Right. But I think, just like anything,

if you're in a business, if you're on a TV show, you know this, then you got to carry yourself a certain way. Right. Because you're being backed by somebody's money.

You know what I'm saying? if you don't want to carry yourself a certain way, then you just got to do your own thing. But if you want to be in movies and TV shows on radio and had this big sponsorship for 85 South, then yeah, you just can't be saying. You know what I'm saying? So I think kind of that, all that goes into being cancer.

The only sponsorship I really got is weed. Well, then you're good. I'm good. You're good. You know what I'm good? Shout out the backwoods and weed. Right. But I don't buy into the cancer shit.

Yeah. You? I'm trying to think of like some of it. I don't give it no energy. Like who's being canceled in it actually, they were actually canceled? Louis C.K. was canceled for a little bit. By who though? Corporate stuff.

But he was still selling out shows. Now he back now, but for a little while, he hasn't sat down. Why is he back? Why is he back if the shit he did? You know how to go, you know how to go? You just lay low, let it die down and he back on, you know what I'm doing his thing? But he'd do his thing independent now. Like he'll shoot his specials.

I thought he always did. He had HBO and all that. He had TV shows, but now he'll do, he'll shoot a special and he'll put it on his website and people just go to his website and watch it. That's how you're supposed to get down anyway. Right. Well, I mean... He made millions doing that shit.

Freaky-ass, nigga. I don't know. I think the only person I can really think they have been canceled, canceled, and the only reason I think he canceled is because he can't come out is R. Kelly. Because if R. Kelly was out right now, a nigga. He sold out. He sold out. But I'm saying he canceled.

counsel because he's not out you know what I'm saying if Art killed a guy on the right day you're gonna hear that shit yeah no he got out right now he said he said he said he said people hey yeah let me tell you though it's gonna be a lot of people has concert with a push schistie y'all and like they don't want to be seen no I don't think nobody embarrassed some people will be you think he's 35 years some people will be didn't it what 35 he's his career or in jail in jail yeah he gave him 35 he he caught 20 and one stayed and 15 But he was wilder, though.

Yeah, he was. And he recorded the shit. He was wilding, dog. How long he been locked up? He been locked up a good little minute. Was it right? Right after the pandemic? He got to be at least five, right?

Yeah, he didn't have enough for a little while. He's been enough for a little bit. That's what I'm saying. You're going to fuck around and look up and like, Nick, guess we're going to get out? He might get out. I'm going to say he's probably going to have to do at least another seven. Yeah, he's going to get out in our lifetime, though.

He's going to do it. He's going to have to do it. But what good is he, though, after that? He'd be able to do. to do like bars and you know I don't know if you could do like arenas he'll be able to do no arenas but people go he'll still be able to go to city winery he'll go to city winery they don't know you know what I'm saying I'm saying shit like yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah he's gonna be a nigga that guy you can do center sage man yeah that's what I'm saying stuff like that like 800

they're going to host them eight hundred man man's too many niggins want to see that nudge man it's too somebody going to put the money up me somebody going to put no money you ain't got to put no You got to book them? What you mean? He ain't got to put no money? You got to pay him? No. He's going to want all here, ticket. He's going to do deal.

He ain't got no money. He ain't going to be to demand them kind of price. Right. He ain't got to come out like a rapper. He's going to come out there. I got $2,500 all in. He's going to have $2,500. All in.

All in. I got $7,500 all in. What you want to do? He got to work your way back up. Yeah. Why wouldn't he take it? $7,500 for about $4,000. songs?

Yeah. He gonna be happy to do it for them. He gonna be happy. All the little clubs down south are gonna book them. Oh, he gonna be booked. He gonna do extra songs. Like no way Kelly can go anywhere and do four fucking songs. I'm just saying.

That's all they gonna pay him for. Seventy-five hundred for four? And he still got a headline. Right. Oh shit, now. I thought they're gonna leave throw him in front of damn. Who gonna go out to him? He are Kelly.

If he got out now, he probably could open up on the usher Chris Brown. And I don't want nobody watching this to think that we condone any of the behavior that that man has been accused of. Zero. Ain't no accused. Convicted. But what I'm saying, it's some other shit that he probably did get away with. I'm just saying we don't condone none of his actions.

At all. Not when I got a daughter, hell. No, we just don't. Shit, Nick Big Meets went and dead all his time. He came home. Right. He came home. But he went in earlier though.

Right. You went in. We look at time flat. We're going to walk around and look up. What do he do? What did he do? What did he do? He did like 24.

He did a majority of that shit. About 27? Yeah. He did damn new the whole 30. Yeah, see now? Yeah, well, shit was. So that's 21, yeah. Yeah, 21.

I think Alcat is going to do about 12. They're going to get a dub out of that. He ain't got no more money. But if he, if he gets in programs and. I'm talking about day kind of money. But the only thing is, his, his, This is the crazy part. When that nigga come out, he can't even do a show.

At the venue by a school, that nigga can't be booked there. Ain't too many venues by no school. If it is, he can't even go there. Because he's going to be a sexual, he's going to be a convicted sexual predator. He'd be like, nigga, I can't perform there. It's a school 100 yards away. Whoever trying to book him, go make sure. They don't want that shit.

Because you got to, man, you know how much. Y'all be underestimating how evil them people are. Who mother? I'm not. Them folks that he had to work for. Right. Yeah, make that shit work. That's what I'm telling you.

Yeah, but he's going back in if he violating. No, he'll be, he'll definitely go back. Because it's going to be some haters. You got to think it's going to be some people mad at he out. But they're going to make sure, though. They're going to find a little shit, whole theater in a small ad time. Yeah, nigger, that bitch better be by a highway. That shit can't be nowhere about no daycares, d'nig.

They're going to work the shit out of there in, too, because he's going to have to do three shows. Nick, they're going to have to work, because I know he owe a lot of people. But think about it, even if he don't even fucking ever perform live again, I'm sure he'll find some kind of way to get some money. He'll be writing songs. He's still right. He's still right. You ain't got to leave the house for to make music, no, more than.

I'm telling him. You're streaming that. You're going to listen to it. I'll Kelly First Day Out. It's going to be 20 minutes long. I ain't going to be at the House sending fouls like a motherfucker, man. He ain't got to leave the house. Never be seen again, still be.

Digger, that's why they had R. Kelly first day out. All that shit gonna be like trapped in the closet. But remember, he dropped the album. He dropped the album while he was in prison, and then he took it off. Yeah. It was on iTunes and people started complaining, and they snatched it.

Yeah. Because, like, who the fuck? He recorded this shit on the jail phone. You can't put no album out. In jail, name? He put an album out, bro. He been singing on all he got a damn call. They're recording the shit to hold them.

They got to keep dropping money. Damn, man. Carl V ain't but 25 minutes long. It's crazy, though, because that's a real... I never was into, like, older women. I don't get the whole little girl shit. That shit is weird. That's because you ain't sick.

That's a different... But that's what I'm saying? This is something wrong. You got to. How can you look at like a kid and be like... And see that sexually? What the fuck do you even want? Right, that's weird.

That's weird. So that's why I couldn't feel sorry for them. When they got that nigga, I was like, that nigger probably need to be in there. That way, I don't know. why people brag about getting a version. I don't want that shit. Right. I want some of experience.

I want some of a little, yeah, a little bit of being around the block. I want to teach you shit. I don't even going to say been around the block, but she knows what the store is. Yeah, me. I mean, you don't know what a lot. She walked through that with a big cousin one time, but she ain't go by itself. At our age, bro, you got to know we ain't fair to get nothing that been just to the store. She's been around that block and she went to the other store too and to the cleaners.

God damn. And I, now, where you been that damn fine of yours is at now? At our age. Dude, think about it, dude, you think you're going to find a 35-year-old that only slept with one person? Hell no. No. Exactly. One person.

So that's the block. I don't want to. One person that slept with one person. Right. You still don't know shit. Man, if any woman 35, boy, you better know. You know what I was thinking about? I feel like they, like, by that age, by this age.

They didn't fuck with everybody that they want to fuck with. You know what's crazy though when you think about it? What is it? When you get grown, if you date a woman 35 and up, you gotta be okay to know it. She ain't a nigger phone sucker dick. Hey. I try not to think about that.

Yeah, that's all right. You gotta know, she is to mind. That's what I'm saying. But that's that I don't want to think about this. See, now that's fucked up, bro. Now you got it. I'm just saying, bro, you gotta know, Your old lady is in somebody phone, bro.

Get a hit from the back, sending butt-naked pigs. This is a nigger got your old lady in her phone. Y'all walked by. She'll be like, nitty. That's your way. I'm just saying at all age. That's the type of shit I'll be blocking out of my mind. Don't tell you, he brings it back.

He resurfaced the shit. I'm just saying, daw. It's sad. I'm trying to put up with it, bitch. It's a sad reality. They're like, damn, my bitch is somebody phone? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Getting dogged out, nigga. She sent him the same pictures she sent you. Yeah, them same pictures she sent you. She took them before that. I thought she knew how to light, how to pull the angle. Yeah. It hurt.

Damn, man. It hurt. I love. Me too, though. It ain't like I'm in the reception. I'm just telling you what it is. No, y'all, you right, though. Yeah.

But like Lowe said, that's some shit we want to think about it. I know. But now you think about how many in your phone, man. You're gonna, it ain't none in my phone. My phone. That's why you gotta be up front about your holding on both sides. Tell me how bad it was. And then let me decide if I want to tell you.

No, but I'm gonna tell you too. Like, I'll tell you I had a period in my life where, you know. I was out. I had them hold. I was outside. I was outside. I was doing my thing, now. I was doing my thing.

I can't judge you because I did it too. Right. So she posted later and say, well, you know, it was a point in my life, well, I was, I was a hoax. I was giving that thing up. So now you're going to be like, now, elaborate what you mean by a hoax. I'm not going to zeal elaborate. All I want to know is, like, what dates? What you mean dates?

What dates? What years were you out of, like, from 2009 to 2014? Or was this from, like, 2008 to prison? Up until she met you. Now, hopefully she then took a few summers off before I got there. You know, my biggest thing would be, did you do anybody I know? I didn't know it up front. You know what I'm saying?

That'd be my big. Don't tell me anybody I know. I need you to tell me. If you spam, hollows, let me know, right? She did. She let me hit. I need to know that. I'm going to tell you, if she ever told you that was her homeboy,

ha, ha. You got that, puss. I don't want nobody out there. thinking that I'm out here. Be your home, boys. That was the cover of, baby. My birthday just passed. I ain't nobody, brother.

I ain't nobody, brother. And all the times that I didn't hit, I tried. Don't never think I ain't tried. This friendship didn't happen organic. If I didn't try, I was not, it wasn't like that. Yeah. I do know a lot of people. That's my only thing.

Let me know if it's somebody. I know and then, you know, I can decide. Don't spring that on me after I like you. Hell yeah. I got trauma. Oh, you, you was on 85 South? I got a tick, bitch. You know damn well. You should have to watch the episode to say that. Like, you better knew that. Come on, you know

we know all know each other. Hey, I'm Tori Webster, and I host That Digital Take. If you've ever wondered how the internet really works from influencer culture to digital marketing and pop culture, is your inside look. Each week, I share what's actually working online, the behind the scenes of building a career as a creator, and real conversations with people shaping the industry.

Think of it like your big sister guide to the digital world. Follow that digital take on IHeart Radio or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jared Adano. You might know me as that loud guy who yells out, help on the internet. Help! Somebody! Please!

But there's so much more to me than me. I'm an actor. I'm a comedian. And recently, I've become. quite the helper myself. And on my new podcast, hope from a hypocrite, I'll be changing lives, helping people in need with my sage advice and thoughtful solutions. Sike, I'm a comedian.

I'm not qualified to give good advice. Join me and my comedian friends as we riff rant and recommend some of the most legally dubious advice known to man. If I'm calling you, even if you're on your phone, let it ring twice. One ring is too scary. Cream of chicken suit Hey, cream a chicken suit This is Help from a Hypocrite

The worst advice from the dumbest people you know Listen to Help from Hypocrite As part of the Mike Coutura Podcast Network Available on the IHart Radio app, Apple Podcasts Or wherever you get your podcasts If you're watching the latest season Of the Real Housewives of Atlanta You already know there's a lot to break down

Gorsha accusing Kelly of sleeping with a merry man They holding Kay Michelle back from fighting Drew. Pinky has financial issues. I like the bougie style of Housewives show. I think it looks like it's going to be interesting. On the podcast, Reality with the King, I, Carlos King, recap the biggest moments from your favorite reality shows, including the Real Housewives franchise,

the drama, the alliances, and the team everybody's talking about. As an executive producer in reality television, I'm not just watching it. I understand the game. As somebody who creates shows, I'll even say this. At the end of the day, when people are at home, they want entertainment. To hear this and more, listen to Reality with the King on the IHard Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, I'm Deanna Maria Riva, actress, mother, lover, and a Gen X woman walking through life one hot flash and hormonal crying jag at a time. You ladies know what I mean.

I'll bet you a paramedaposal chin here you do. So let's talk about it. Join me on my new podcast. How hard can it be with the Adam Maria Riva, where I call on my Gen X squads from Ohio to Hollywood as we navigate midlife's most fantastic BS. All of a sudden, I'd had hanginess happening on my own. I was like, what the hell is that? I was married when I had her, so I didn't even consider how empty that nest was going to be. Mood swings, night sweats, fupas, sex drive. Wait, what sex? Dating at 45. How high can it be getting naked at 50?

with the new guy. That one's kind of hard. Well, that's lighting. They say we can't polish a turd, but we're sure going to try. So let's get blunt with laughs, tears, or tears of laughter, and dive into it,

unfiltered and unbothered and ask, how hard can it be? I cannot believe I'm about to say this out loud in public. Listen to How Hard Can It Be with Diana Maria Riva as part of my Cultura podcast network available on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Sometimes it's just shit to get you some pussy. Sometimes I want me to blare me to blest. and just give you some pussy just because she wants you to have it. Right, let me know though. Sometimes you get some, do you go on here? Yeah, let me know. If you slept with somebody I know and I like you, let me know.

If you slept with somebody I know, don't tell me. Well, it's either or. So then if they ask me about it, I was like, I didn't know. Right. But you don't want to find out too late. I don't want to find that. I don't care what's at all. Before I was fucking you.

The only questions I'd be asking is, is this was healthy? Right. Is them kids dad there around? Definitely need to do that. What are your views on child support? But you know it's crazy, though. You support you. Why, you're in somebody falling second.

You're definitely, definitely not. Why, yes, she is. Definitely somebody falls down. You got to think about it, though. If she'd get you some good head, she had to get some. She gave somebody else good head, on a little practice. Yeah.

That's why niggas hate to see you happy, because niggas know. Yeah. Sometimes, a lot of them the ones that get cuff first, Ain't nothing like losing a good freak. It takes years to get over that. Dude, it takes, but it takes a long time to break up with a freak. You put up with a lot. If it's a freak, you put up with a lot, dog.

Like, you put up with a lot. What's the cutoff? I mean, it just depends how, you know. Sometimes you have to. For your own safety. For your own piece before you do something crazy. But you ain't just going to break up with a freak first argument. You ain't just going to walk away.

You're going to work that out. You know what I'm saying? Like, yeah, you can't just... You're going to auger for a few years. Especially if you lost the freak before you, because you know how hard it is to replace that. To get one you compatible with? You're not compatible with?

You ain't about to just go out here and find another freak. You got used to the freak and shit. But you can find a freak, but you still may not be compatible. Right. But if you get a free, you're compatible, man, you'd be like, dog, I can't mess this up. Like, I'm talking about she'd do everything you like. I know.

You had created a monster. Without action. And then you gotta just release all this to the street. To another dude? You got a broken her ear. Oh, do you even know? If you still with another dude, you'd be like, oh, he's getting all that.

All of that. Some of them comrade, you ain't had to tear up. Because somebody already did it for you. And they feel like that. I know how she get down. They hurt. Yeah. Damn, man.

I had a nigga DM me about a bitch out on my story one time. And I wouldn't even fucking bitch. She was just right beside us. So you know what that mean? You responded to, D. She didn't. She didn't. You responded, D.

Uh-uh, I left him on scene. Uh-uh. That means she don't freak him out before. You should have responded with two words. Ask her. Yeah. He would tell to me, sir. He had like he would tell to me, sir.

Ask her. That bitch, eat her. So? I would have responded, like, I'm trying to get eight then, niggins. I should have. They were no earsprown. And Victor was that hour.

She was just at the bar. Me and now was at the bar. And they were hey. You watch the show. Don't go too detail. I was just sure. He was like, look at these fucking. They're gonna hit something about me.

Don't get a nigga none to post, man. I'm the nigga that dm. You, you, nigga, tell on this. That one. That one, clip that shit to put it on TikTok. You see the nigga right here? Yeah. That nigga talking about me.

He's going to DM right here. His nigga about the big. Look, he responded to everything. Lying there, nink. You know, I ain't say shit. I'm like, damn. Man, my wish I had an old-knit wide wood though. No, bro.

This is shit you've been hearing all your life, but you just had to get to a certain age to even start exercising that shit. Don't ask all that shit. You ain't going to be able to handle that shit. You can't handle that, man. You can't handle that, man. You can't handle that, man.

You can't handle that, man. She can't tell you the truth. If I don't like you, I don't want to know that. Niggins, she fuck around and tell you, 68. You're like, God damn. But you didn't fuck, 3,000. It don't matter, though. But that's 68.

You're 68. I can. I will. So you don't care about a body gun? No, I'm trying to add to it. Yeah, I don't want to be with a woman that's been with 68, though. But if you think about that, why you dick investigating? I wouldn't ask. I would never ask. You shouldn't be investigating dicks, man. What's wrong with you?

I'm just saying. Yeah, I wouldn't ask. Now, if it's falling in my lap, I don't want to be that nigga that, like, all right, when we go home for your, you know. The whole town on here, everybody's like, They're gonna do like a girl Yeah Yeah yeah yeah

Oh dirty Like bitch, why everybody Snickering and shit Don't pay them on my eye They don't like me here Yeah bitch They love you here I wouldn't give a fuck

Wait do we go to my hometown We both got a hometown Because it ain't gonna happen like that We're gonna be somewhere that you really Wanted to be And then all the holes that I Whoa! They ain't gonna all be there They might laugh at you

When they see you with me Yeah, I don't want to know Don't tell me Unless it's low If it's a low number You can tell you What the fuck am I like to go But if it's high

Don't tell me Do you lie To tell me the truth Because you might have to answer That question too Yeah, lie to me But I'm a lie So she's gonna tell you 6 to 8

And then when you bring up 3,750 and you're going to have to explain that Say 12 So I could be better than her. I'm better than you. You're not ever talk shit to me. She's going to feel like, damn.

Yeah, yeah, I'm a good person. You was out here just swinging it. Like, giving that shit. You ain't got no type. Your type is alive. Anybody got a few dollars? Y'all awfully judgmental. No, I don't.

I said, I wouldn't ask. I don't want to know. That's how you protect. You know, I've been here to protect your peace. I've finally realized. That shit is true. I thought it was cliche. But yeah, that's it true.

You can protect your peace. You have to. Yeah, you can not ask certain things you don't really want to know. And you know the best part? You can just not believe it. It's hard to not believe it. You can just not believe.

No. You can just not believe. You can't believe it more. I'm not going to believe in no way. I'm going to believe it's more. If you're sorry, believe in shit, it's going to become real. It's only real if you believe it.

I just leave it long. Yeah. This shit then turn it. I don't believe nobody gonna tell the truth no way, so why even bring it up? That's the point that I'm making. But the problem is, sometimes you get somebody that does tell the truth. You're like, you should have lied. But I'm not gonna believe it.

I'm not gonna believe it. You could be telling the fucking honest to guard truth. And I'm gonna be like... So with 1010. You think she's more? And I'm gonna think it's 133. God, damn. See?

I'm gonna think she left out the one she don't like, the one that probably in jail, the one that wasn't good. The one that's dead? Yeah, the one that broke her heart, shit like that. I was thinking about what you said. about what you say, you said you're gonna say 10, you're gonna go under. I take it over. Dude's always go under.

Because I gotta make it seem like I'm better. See, I'm trying to be better more of me. You don't want to know me, dude. Three thousand, seven hundred, 50, what? What, what? Why?

They be on me like that. Yeah. Yeah, I'm funny. People like me, goddavin. Yeah. And out of those six to eight, She had to visit the clinic a few times. 608 is a lot, bro.

That's a lot of traffic. Somebody doesn't set that stuff on the fire. That's a lot of track. That's not, that's a football team before they cut. That's before Monday that last Monday. That's like a high school football team. That's before that last Monday on NFL, though. That's before the last, because Monday is 52.

That means she don't hit niggas that got cut. That's a lot. I can't be 69. She doesn't have to take a few pills. Yeah, I can't be 60. Yeah. You're probably a hundred and fifty. Probably, but I ain't know, though.

Some of the best places you've been, a lot of people, than been there. The best restaurants you've been. You ain't the only page for you. That's why you're doing about it. Oh, my God. You think you discovered some shit? You weren't there when they opened?

You can't keep room prints going by yourself, bro. Man, did you see the sign in the window? This shit is established in 1985. You ain't even started coming out. No, be in like 2000. How do you think we've been open? How do you think we've been surviving, you just said you need women 35 enough? You had no idea if she was on earth for 35 years.

What the fuck do you think she's been doing? Hopefully not 68. Sight, it's like a wild summer. And imagine what a bit doing is she in love with you. So is she going to be in love with another nigga before? Oh, my God. Well, then she probably won't. See, the thing is the trick is if you get a chick that been in the relationships

They're number won't be as bad. Because even if she's cheat, she'd be cheat with one dude. This is one thing I know that is an absolute fact about women. We don't know shit about them. Everything we think we know is wrong. I get it. I don't know, man. I know a little something. I ain't gonna say I'm an expert.

I don't know shit about it. I know a little something. Everything that I think I know, I was like, nope, because I know somebody who do them straight opposite of that. Right. Well, I mean, it's not an absolute. You know, it's not because we all, then it would be like the same thing we meant,

and we're all different. You know what I'm saying? So, yeah, but women are complicated, though. That's fuck. They're complicated. But if you show them attention, it's a little easier on you. It don't matter.

You can get a business. Well, you be having bitches that like to fight, though, so yours is different. You be getting violent-ass chicks. Like, where do you meet them? Where do you just go to probation? Didn't you, didn't you change? No, bro.

I got a smart-ass mouth. Huh? I had a smart ass mouth. He was one of them drug dealers that was standing you with the money. He said, he's just just bollasped the holes. He's a good drug dealer got holes stealing. I used to take my shit back, dude. Oh, you pet it like that.

Yeah. So that's what I'm saying. He always going to have them kind of problem with me putting their hands on me and shit. You can't even take something back. How does that work? Easy. I'm going to get it back. What you're going to do with it?

You just don't want to have it. He ain't going to never see the other side of the game. I used to be my son's a lot of shit. You're supposed to leave all that shit. I don't took back pistols, bun glasses, groceries, everything. So you don't took back a dirty pistol? Huh? It wasn't dirty because it was in my name.

You don't, that was done to begin. How are you gonna get a gun your pistol? Now, she don't kill somebody. No, no. She was my bitch. She ain't killed nobody. He crazy. Yeah, nigger, I ain't getting nobody no pistol.

Hell now, I go get you one for you. You ain't even to have my pistol in my name. Hell no. No, shoot mine. My girl. You was in love like a mother. He was a pistol? Nah, he gets your own pistol, pay.

We were living together. Hell no. Lucky she ain't pulled that bitch on you. She looked and she did. That bitch would have had more holes than a thought-shocker by the time the man got there to touch her neck. You must have had another pistol then. I keep pistols. It wasn't on me right now.

Two. Wait, is this people looking for this, nigga? No. Oh, okay. He just got PTSD. He's telling drug. Yeah, he got two pistols? Right now.

Yeah. And on the podcast, then? Right. The camera's dirty? No, I just, that's it me. That's what you're doing? This thing going to jail. Well, actually, three, but two on me.

This niggins thing, he's John Wick. Exactly. You know you could only shoot one, really. I can shoot two. Not accurately. I can shoot two. You can't shoot two pieces. All right.

What are you going to be here tomorrow? I'm leaving tomorrow. All right, cool. How many time you with the ring? Huh? I go often. I ain't been in the wild, but I go off. I'm the son of a Marine.

I've been to shoot guns since I was eight years old. Okay. I believe. I believe them, too. I believe them. I ain't going to guarantee you 100% accurate. If I was in some shit where I had to clear this fucking rule about, you better believe. I'm going to succeed.

Well, Nick, if you pull the piss out right now, you're clearing this bitch out, you're the only one way one. No, I ain't. I'm not for to shoot no-ass room. This ain't no movie. This ain't no boon. You're not going to do you. Right. The fuck did this right.

This ain't no goddamn movie, man. Nobody did you, motherfuck. Y'all cut this shit out, man. Hey, this ain't a five-south show, got damn. Y'all cut that shit out. You take that shit down the street. No. I hope I never have to.

You don't want to, bro. I don't want to. That's the whole point. I don't want to. I'm not one of the hot thing of motherfuckers. I don't want to do that. That just in case I don't want to. Last resort.

Yes. Yeah. Because I got other weapons, too. Hey, hey, hey, stop all that. The goddamn it is, you don't know who's watching this shit. Yeah, you don't, the thing is... If you're fucking around and get pulled over. Justin, where's this goddamn pepper frame?

Why aren't you here tapping on yourself? Like, Justin, what's the third pistol? John, how do you get from him? You got to know. You got to know. I heard of them say it on that show. And there's some goddamn pepper in here somewhere. There's some nun chubs.

I'm good. They can do it whatever they want to. They got to get it back. They're going to be good. going through the whole car. What did you find, Chuck? Well, we got six condoms. Yeah.

11 loose bullets. Some cologne. We got some, we got some, we got some, we got some Fahrenheit. Got a headman scale that's weighing up to cracklet. Oh, boy. Two bottles of savage. And a shrank toothbrush. Oh, boy.

Admitting all kind of illegal shit on here. No, nothing is illegal. I'm good. Yeah, because y'all don't even need no license down here, right? I still have mine, though, because they... Y'all don't need no... It's open carry out of here, right? Yeah, you don't have to, but it's easier to buy your gun out of the stove it.

Is it open carry? I don't know, I guess. It's open carry out here. In California, it's not... I know you can have it, you know, you can have it concealed without a license. That's open care. We don't have open carry. You got to conceal in LA.

And then you can't have anything that hold more than 10, right? Only 10. I got a AR and only got 10. Yeah. I have to have my glock when I go, my, uh, 43 when I go out. Only 10, bro. Real shit. 10.

That's how the clips come. And then you get caught with a clip more than 10, yo, that's going to jail. You can have several lines. Don't, I don't give up. Yeah, you can have several tens. Yeah. Please shit to fuck up. I don't know nothing.

But you can't have, you can't have no banana. You're going to jail. I don't know nothing about none of this shit. I don't know. I don't know. But mine's legal, though. I got license. Yeah, me too.

But when I fly with my gun out there, I have to take a gun that don't hold more. You can't do it. Your license is not good in California. Right, but I feel possess a firearm in California that don't hold more than 10. You can't have it on you. It's like that. You're going to jail, boy. I've been bored off with you.

I'm just trying to help the man not go to jail. He's going anyway. Why the fuck would you? I don't know who you. I'm telling you. I've been poured off with you. And you had a gun on you. We was out there for Netflix.

On you. We couldn't. All this. And the police let you go. Yes. For the car. Now, y'all don't think you was in California. You was hot.

We was in California. You was in Arizona. You was in Arizona. But California don't even play like that, dog. No. Cali don't play like that. You was not in California. And had a pissed on you out of town and they let you go?

Brer. Nah, brer. They ran that gun. They ran that gun and let me go. And you had it on you. No, we was in the car. I was in the car. Yes.

You were going to jail. Br, they pulled me over. You was not in California? Yes, I was on Hollywood. They pulled me over. Oh, you definitely were that. Oh, my God. I was on Hollywood, bro.

They ran the gun and they let me go. Shit, hey, maybe. I don't know. I'm going to go out. I'm not going to bullshit you, but I say, I don't know I want that. But I just know in California, you can't even have it on you, unless you got license. That bit was in the car. They ran that bar.

fucking gun and they let me go. Hey, you got angels. I would like to encourage everybody to live a safe, peaceful life. Legal life. Legal life. A safe legal life.

Stop the violence. Yeah. And love on your life. They're just wanting to make sure that kill once though. We can do this in the community if we continue to push positivity amongst our people

and education and strive to live in a society. Well, we don't have to worry about it. Well, we ain't got to have three pistols. We don't have to have three pistols. And you can only have ten bullets. I love guns. But don't you have a big clip?

Huh? Three bullets. Because all little more conceal. You can't conceal no. One of them got four in it. It's up to you to guess which one's holding four. God damn John Wick in real life. Yeah, yeah.

No, my dad had a Marine. I've been shooting guns since I was eight years old. No. It just, I love it. My dad was the father, and we shot pooh. Come up on the next episode. That's 85 times. Body count, 68, too low or two high.

Let me not you think. Phone lines are. Where are you in your body count? Where are you in your body count? What is a bad body count? All of them. It don't matter. It all depends on the age, I think.

The age, because you can't. You know what? So where it stayed a good number? Hey. I don't think since you're a good number for anybody. of healthy pussy and don't look back. Right. Look forward.

Just look at it, look at her red and white cell count. Right. That's what matters. Oh, that matters. Yeah. If her white cell count low, don't matter. If she been with one person, if them blood cells count low. Find you a little freak that you like and don't worry about that.

I have. Fuck what other niggis think. How often y'all get tested? Oh, twice of you? Yeah, I'm on that. Twice a year. I got this good-ass health. I get my eyes yearly.

Because you be out here. You be taking chances, huh? Not, it just, I'm saying. He gets tested every time he goes to the hospital and put domestic violence. You be taking chances? Not really. No, no.

Now, you have to take care of yourself, man. We're black men, we out here. I'm too old to be taking time. Live long. Hell yeah, it ain't about no fucking. It's just, man. You got to go. I get tested for counseling and shit, too, though, right?

It's other shit you better be scared of to eat your ass. up just worse as a goddamn STD? Hell yeah. That shit that had you all bent over and shit. Child sport. What is that? Child sport had you fucked up too.

But I don't want it. There's some niggas out here suffering from osteoporosis. I don't even know it. Nigger shingles. Nika bones is just, I know somebody who has shingles, you don't want that shit, boy. I don't want nothing that they put on TV

and give you a commercial. You can't even sit back like that. If it's on your back, That, nigga, that shit, you can't even put clothes on, dog. The shingles, that shit is crazy. That's worse than sunburn. Yeah, it's worse than sunburn. So you just got lay around neck and all that down there.

I don't know that shit, nigga. It's bad, bro. It's painful as hell, dog. But it's not really our shit. Like, most black people don't get it. But, yeah, that shit really. How do you get it? It just pop up?

They say, crazy thing is, and don't quote me, but I think they say most of us have it. It's like one of those viruses. From like the chicken pockets. Yeah, so it could just activate. But most people got it in them. It's just be dormant. It could pop off any minute, nigga.

I'm just going to go to one of the holistic people and start eating and take it. You already know you got it. It's too late. They say they can cure anything. No, they can't cure shit. They can help you improve the quality of life, but it's just still there.

Yeah. Because we don't know what the fuck might happen, man. You think that we're going to be safe, but then you don't know what, You might wake up tomorrow and then your polio is activated, nigga. That vaccine well off for 40 years. We don't even know the shit. Nicky wake up tomorrow with Ricketts.

Bert, don't give me that another thing about it. Nicky got goddamn gout. Me, you don't even know the shit, mom. You got kids and shit, nigga. Every day is a blessing, man. God bless you every day. We all going to have to go though. Tomorrow you can wake up and not wake up.

Rickets, nigg, bolegs. I was going to Google it. I appreciate the cat. I'm gonna like, what the fuck is that? Nick. So you can't take calcium and beat it? Because we didn't see what happened to old people. We didn't all seen that old that man

he bent up and a nigga just shuff. But think about old people's diets, bro. Especially what we're from. Man, I don't know. I don't ever want my back to be like that, that's scary. That's scoliosis. Think about the people.

They grew up working hard. Real hard in his life. grew up working they're not only when you'd be trying to pick up him and shit all the time in a fucking field picking and shit it's over with me hard work they literally broke they fucking back

it's scoliosis though it's scary but little I'm saying it just be shit you don't even never see coming cataracts niggas yeah hearing aid part of getting old bro it's a blessing though

it's a lot of healthy dead young niggas It's a lot of healthy-ass 21 you're dead in the pool. Has this show gone? This is, you see we're talking about the end of life. It's damn near the end of the show. Okay, yeah, all right, cool. We're talking about the final phases. All right, let's get up beat then.

No, I mean, not like that part, but we're looking forward to being old. But being over. That's a blast it. We don't have to be the old niggas in the high community. A lot of these niggins aren't smart enough to make it. You're being old. I ain't talking about the ones who to be old. victims like, you know, they got somebody help them.

The one's throwing their lives away. Some motherfuckers just don't have what it take to live this goddamn long. No, you're right. Yeah. Well, they're not doing anything to live there. Yeah. We went to high school with a few motherfuckers who already then gave up. These niggas don't, they don't sleep.

I don't know why they'd be thinking if I ever, they'll sleep when I die. You're gonna die a lot earlier. Go to sleep. I go to sleep. I go to sleep. I get my sleep. I don't go to sleep. go to bed.

You can't work properly with no rich. Yeah, because I'll say the four in the morning. They ain't going to make me rich because I'm up to a four in the morning. But the people that, you know, people that used to say that shit, you don't find out that they all was on cocaine and all that other than shit. They were popping pills. That's why your head can't go to sleep. When I was younger, there was a time I could, I could operate on about four and a half hours.

Yeah. But now I need at least six, bro. I need to take a nap. I didn't take a nap. I didn't take a nap for I came here. If I don't get six, I got a headache. I'm moody. Yeah, man, I got to get, I got to lay down, though.

I ain't one of them more. The only way I'm going to avoid a nap is if I need to really go to sleep tonight because I got to get her early tomorrow. Yeah, because I'm 6.6.30 every day, so. So this is a podcast about video games. Kind of. It's also about friendship. Definitely.

And chaos. Unavoidably. Welcome to It's Dangerous to Go Alone. A podcast where we talk games, culture, nostalgia, and immediately go off topic. There is no gatekeeping. There is no skill check. If you win a game on easy mode, we support you. If you've never touched a controller, honestly.

Same energy for some of us. It's fun, it's chaotic, it's friendship with a loose gaming theme. And somehow we keep getting away with it. You should listen. Stream it's dangerous to go alone on the free IHeartRadio app. Or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jordanano. You might know me as that loud guy who yells out,

help on the internet. Help! Somebody! Please! But there's so much more to me than me. I'm an actor. I'm a comedian. And recently, I've become quite the helper myself. And on my new podcast, Hope from a Hippocry. I'll be changing lives, helping people in need with my sage advice and thoughtful solutions. Sike, I'm a comedian.

I'm not qualified to give good advice. Join me and my comedian friends as we riff, rant, recommend some of the most legally dubious advice known to man. If I'm calling you, even if you're on your phone, let it ring twice. One ring is too scary. Oh, cream of chicken suit. Hey, cream. Cream a chicken suit. This is help from my phone.

A Hypocrite, the worst advice from the dumbest people you know. Listen to Help from a Hypocrite as part of the Mike Pulura Podcast Network available on the IHart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. If you're watching the latest season of the Real Housewives of Atlanta, you already know there's a lot to break down. Gorsha accusing Kelly of sleeping with a married man. They holding Kay Michelle back from fighting Drew. Pinky has financial issues.

I like the bougie style of Housewives show. I think it looks like it's going to be interesting. On the podcast, Reality with the King, I, Carlos King, recap the biggest moments from your favorite reality shows, including the Real House Wise franchise, the drama, the alliances, and the team everybody's talking about. As an executive producer in reality television, I'm not just watching it.

I understand the game. As somebody who creates shows, I'll even say this. At the end of the day, when people are at home, they want entertainment. To hear this and more, listen to Reality with the King on the IHard Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, I'm Deanna Maria Riva, actress, mother, lover, and a Gen X woman walking through life one hot flash and hormonal crying jag at a time. You ladies know what I mean. I'll bet you a perimenapausal chin here you do. So let's talk about it.

Join me on my new podcast. How Hard Can It Be with Deanna Maria Riva, where I call on my GenX squads from Ohio to Hollywood as we navigate midlife's most fantastic. BS. All of a sudden I'd had hanginess happening on my I was like what the hell is that? I was married when I had her so I didn't even consider

how empty that nest was going to be. Mood swings, night sweats, fupas sex drive, wait, what sex? Dating at 45, how can it be getting naked at 50 with the new guy. That one's kind of hard now? Well, that's lighting. They say we can't polish a turd, but we're sure going to try. So let's get

blunt with laughs, tears, or tears of laughter and dive into it unfiltered and unbothered and ask, how hard can it be? I cannot believe I'm about to say this out loud in public. Listen to How Hard Can It Be with Diana Maria Riva as part of my Cultura podcast network available on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What'd you be doing up there?

He'd the gym. In the gym? Hit the gym? That's my low therapy. You need some therapy, man. That's my therapy. Not just you, but I'm saying. You need a bit.

You know what the gym like for me? Real shit, the gym is like, you know, y'all know y'all comes. You know there's no matter what you're going through when you get on that stage, it's gone. Yeah. Pain or whatever. Whatever. I don't perform where I had like a bad cold. I'm coughing the whole time. Don't cough. When I get on stage, I don't cough.

Toothache, back pain, all that shit. You don't feel that. So that's how the gym is like when I'm not on stage, when I'm in the gym for that hour, whatever's going on in my head and my mind, I'm numb to it, dog. And then when I walk out to gym, I'm like, damn. Yeah, I got to do it.

with that. Yep. So it's not even so much a physical thing for me. It's a mental thing too. You know what I'm saying? So it's like a does. It's a plus plus. Yeah.

So I gotta go. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, give yourself some more years, man. You know what I'm saying? Get yourself some more years. Why not? That's a hell of a message.

Get your ass up. Get active. Go for a walk. Even if you don't go to the gym. Walk a mile every day. Man, what? Just walk in your neighborhood, if it's a good neighborhood, if it's loose dogs, don't do that. And if you don't know how to walk.

Now you got to, I walk like a white lady named Kathy sometime. Yeah. As long as you walk it, that's power walking. I do all this shit. Yeah. I imitate other people's walking. You walk a fan bro with the high elbow. Yeah, yeah.

That's some good cardio. White people walking. They walk with high elbows. If you walk a mile for 30 days, everyday dude, I bet if you're somebody trying to lose weight, you're a job. you'll drop. He don't have no weight to lose. Not him, I'm just saying, then he won't be able to hold his guns.

If he's losing any more weight, it's over, a nigga. That nigga gotta hold his guns. You know what I'm saying? I keep on the damn message about the fucking 30 days. Not but for a minute. If you walk a mile for 30 days, you're going to drop some pounds.

You know what I'm saying? People don't realize how much walking can make a difference in your life, dog. You got to eat right too now. You got to eat right too. They can't walk a mile out of the fucking Freddy's and get a goddamn custard with a hamburger. But guess what? Even if you didn't eat right, you won't gain, you'll lose it.

You'll lose it. If you ate it, then you'll just walk it off. Something they're gonna be stacking his head. Now but people, you gotta- So basically the message is do something. Get your ass up. Don't just lay around. Get active, man.

I need to. You know, here's the crazy thing. This is what I've learned over the years, man. I've been really trying to be grateful. You know how sometimes you'd be like, man, this ain't going right, this ain't going right, but then you look, you're like, but a lot of shit is going right. Exactly.

You know how many people wish they could go for a walk? Yep. You know what I'm saying? So, you know how many people wish they could just get up? You know what I'm saying? And when we take it for granted, we don't even think about it because we're doing it,

you know what I mean? So it'd be like little things. You'd be like, oh man, damn. Okay, that's, I'm tripping. Life ain't that bad. It ain't. You know what I'm saying? As bad as you think it is, it could be worse, bro.

I don't want it to be. You know what I'm saying? And it's never, life is never as bad as you think and it's never as good as you think. It's always right there's someone in the middle, man. That's the best spot, though. Yeah, just be grateful, you know what I'm saying?

Be grateful. Just be grateful, dog. You never as hot as you think. You said something like. You said something in. You said something in. You know what I'm mean? So just be grateful.

That's how I just, and I try to practice that because, you know, naturally you go negative. All right. And I tell God that, you know, I'm grateful, but I'm human. Yeah, it's natural for you to go negative. You know what I'm saying?

You got to practice that, though. And then I say my serenity prayer. Yeah. So what's your up? That's why they let you go in Hollywood. Hey, you were covered. Well, I don't know where to war. Y'all, y'all just put me on something because I swore to go.

I did not know that shit. They motherfucker ran that goddamn gun and that tag and they let me go. They asked me a few questions. What I was doing there, all this and that shit, they let me go. Right. Oh. Motherfugger's a special agent. You got a praying grandmother.

Mm-hmm. You know what? You say that. Watching rush him out. She was looking. She was in the Trump. My grandmother had dead die. Let my baby go.

Grandma's hands. I ain't got no grandmas, though. I'm telling you, I'm about to give me two more. I ain't got no granddad. I ain't got no parents or grandparents. I'm just an orphan. We got to adopt us some new family members. We don't lost too many.

I can't go on a field trip. Ain't nobody signed my phone. Did you grow up with your granddaddy's? Yeah, I had my grandma. I never had one. My granddad was dead early, but I knew him. They both were dead. My grandmother lived a long time.

I knew her, you know, but. Both of my grandmama. You ain't never had a granddad. No, they were dead. But you have both grandmas. Yeah. You need a good grandma. The best part about being Miss.

I had an angel and the deal. Is you get like 15 grandma. Yeah, you had a lot of grandmas. Had a lot of grandmas. Just Missillaneous grandma. I had my great grandma. That's why I don't feel bad about giving me some new grandma. Right.

Because you're used to it. Yeah, yeah. Everybody claiming you. Absolutely. Know that's my grandson. If you're watching this and you got a grandma and she want to adopt me, I'm looking for some new grandma. You're right.

If you got a grandma, you ain't used it. And then I want me three uncles at barbecue. And it's something. I need, I need me by four. With the cigarette hanging? Absolutely. Yeah, they say Logan cooked like here. He ain't had it.

You know that. You know what you can. Like a motherfucker. He's going to tell you to pull up, but he ain't Never told me one man. I'm gonna tell you we gonna do a cook out out here We gonna film this shit and I'm gonna show y'all the real sauce what you what you cook what's your what's your best thing They say the reals is the mother real oh you get down the best mother for you're gonna I'm talking about tendinism before tendinism

Who taught you how to cook me? Oh you just you just tried it yeah I don't hear about them bro See this the thing I moved out when I was 18 so I always had my own crib so I had a long time to cultivate the shit that I'm good at Right. Like I really was a great entertainer, you know, putting the atmosphere together and inviting a few nice young ladies through there and putting them up on good, you know. Some good barbecue. Yeah, some good barbecue and things of that nature. It made all the things that they liked and showed them how to really enjoy a sedentism, you know, vibes before they was called. Right. Just when we had atmosphere. It's called chilling. Just cooling. We just had an atmosphere. Cooling. Yeah. Cooling. Yeah. So you ribs and it was the side dish. Oh, I usually do some shit like I'll do some macaroni or I made some great baked beans to go with that shit. All the cookouts out.

All the down south cookout food. Yeah, absolutely. And then I make some great hot dogs and then we'll go get some, we'll have some slaw with that. And then that's just magnificent right there. Homemade sloth? Right. And then, you know, if you have a nice lady in your life, she might make some deviled eggs and potato salad. You know, a few sats of that nature.

A little salad. Some people like a little. salad with it. Corn is a good side for barbecue. Yeah. That's not like a good-ass day. Absolutely. It is. Kind of a good-ass day right now. Hot dogs and hamburgers and then we do some kind of form of steak and then we'll put some ribs on there, throw some chicken on there, you know. That corn got it on the grill though. Right. Got it going to go on the grill. Right. But see then, you know, I'm not,

see, I'm so skilled with it. I got a smoker and a grill. Damn. I'm smoked, I might smoke a whole turkey or something. See, I don't know how to cook, man. That's my one thing. You can't cook at all? I mean, I can cook for me. No, it's just, you gotta slow down. I cook for me.

You're supposed to at least know how to cook, Kunk and all that shit. Trip, they had to be talking about. Oh, hey, Kunk, you ever had Kunt? No. Shick made me want to try. Dude, it's... What is it, really?

I'm sorry, I don't know. Don't get me hell in the comment. I don't know. It's almost like a snail, basically, but I'm not saying it right, but it's like a sea shell. And they take this like in the and they just take the do they fry it you could fry it you can bake it you could yeah they make it all kind of ways you can fry it though most people eat it fried but then you got cunk salad that when you go over there which is vegetable they're gonna tell you you need to eat this yeah if you ever go to Bahamas you've been to Miami yeah several times you can get it yeah I just never try it but if you go to Bahamas you have to get it yeah you go to Bahamas they want to let you come back huh they always do you get it you can get it yeah they always do you get it you can get it. They always do it. I tell you, it's good. It's good, though.

Make you want to fuck. It's good, though. They say it's supposed to be a, yeah. They say it's supposed to do that. Aphrodisi. Yeah. So it's almost like oysters and shit. It's almost like oysters, but it's a little more tender.

It's harder, you know. But like in Bahamas, they'll literally go out to the ocean, grab it, put it out in front of you. Yeah. And offer it to you. And put it in the cunk salad. You can eat it right there. They put in vinegar and they put some like, like, lemon.

lemon and then like couple like bell peppers and on yeah I'm not doing that you're mind going to have to hit some corn mill or some grease I ain't doing that they got plenty of that fire you're you're tried though yeah they got the people who are go out there and come back and cook it however you want but if you just do the cunt salad it'll be right there right on the boat knock it out for you but they'll fry it in front of you too cool fresh cool like fresh out if you go over there you at least got a track because you know I don't eat a whole lot they're I had to just try it.

Yeah, you got, you liked it. I mean, it wasn't my favorite. Yeah. I don't even like seafood like that. Yeah. Yeah, I eat catfish. That ain't seafood, niggins. Loxter.

I'm saying, like, I'm telling you all the seafood I eat. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I eat lobster tail. I eat calomari here now, depending on who got it. Right. Yeah. If you eat calibrary, I eat gator tail. That's like con.

By eat fried calamar. Right, but it's like con. It's like the same texture. That's why I said they got a fried. Right. It's the same texture, though. Yeah. But to me it tastes better than calamari.

Everything, all this shit, I do eat, got to be fried. Right. I don't eat sushi and all that shit. Sushi fire, though. Oh. You want to eat yellow tail sushi? You got to try that. I'm in different types of sushi either.

I thought it was just one. What I'm saying? Yellowtail is raw, though. Oh, I definitely eat that. Yeah, yellow tail, they just put a little salt, like, little lemon, vinegar, whatever on there. It's very thin, though. It's like slice real thin. You gotta open up, man.

No hell I don't. Yeah, you do, bro. You only little one? That nigga told you, he's from DeSoto, Georgia. You heard him say... You got to open up your palate, bro. You heard him say that catfish was seafood. It is.

For as I'm concerned. He said it hard, too, catfish. I fuck with that catfish. Well, they said that seafood spot that. They do put it in the seafood category, though. I'm going to eat it. I'm gonna eat it. What's your favorite fish?

Catfish. Damn. This nigga palate is real limited. Really, I eat the same shit all the time. Yeah. People in the restaurants know me. Bullet. No, I ain't eat no millet.

I don't eat mullet. I don't eat mullet. I don't eat brim or, uh, uh, I like bass catfish. I don't eat nothing but catfish. Give me a catfish sandwich. I like columbia. I don't want no bread. You don't want no bread.

If you had a prize. Yep. I eat some bait bean. Bay beans are going hard, though. Yeah, I eat baby. I eat some baked bean. I like baby beans. I'm going to invite y'all things to a cookout, man.

I want you all to really just enjoy this pimping that I'm going to display. So you get it in. Yeah, man. You know that, man. That's dope. Hell yeah. In Mississippi, you got to be able to feed yourself. Right.

That's a man you should be able to anyway. Because it's like, you know, if you were in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, in the, dirty South like we in the dirty South. If you open up these wings, you can't fuck these wings up, and you can't just cook two or three of them. You gotta, this is the pack of wings. You can't fuck up the pack of wings. Right, because you're gonna get cussed out.

Absolutely. You ever use the air fryer or you never think is just straight? Daily, I've already mastered the air friar. I got the air friar, the deep fryer, the stove. I'm just pushing the limits with my air friar. I'm making cookies and all kinds of tastes and shit. They're trying to shit.

They gotta put a whole lasagna in the airprime. I'm like, geezie whipping up straight at my airfrats. What else can I put in that bitch? Yeah, I got an air fry. How hard to come like that, though? What a fry is a flask of oven? Crock pot, too. Oh, man, you put some roasting now.

And then just leave. Just go to work, come back. Find you something else to do. Yeah. Come back. You ready to eat. You ready to eat. Tendanism.

Yep. I got the crop pots sitting over there. Oh, yeah. Out of my guard, mama. Yeah. We get down though, babe. You've got to know how to feed yourself. I know how to feed myself.

That's what I'm saying. I'm not afraid to be cooking for nobody. I ain't, I ain't there yet. Nah. You ain't never cooked for one. No, I ain't. Never. Not even on the grill.

Not even on the grill, though. Oh, man. Come on, man. That's my weakness, boy. I'm not ashamed to put my flaws out there. That's all right. You still pay for it. You know, no, I don't know why you're scared to do it.

No, I ain't scared to do it. You scared? Because they'll feed you some nasty ass-ass food. Requint. I take pride and, you know what I'm saying? If I'm gonna do something, I'm gonna do it. So I wouldn't wanna share, just like, I'm not gonna share certain art until I feel like it's ready. So I wanna share my food.

You're a perfectionist. Because I feel like food is art, though. Your profession. Food is. I want to say I'm a, but I think food is art. It is, because they treat that out of them. It's culinary art. You're gonna look at her way different

when she gave you that macaron and them noodles thing right. Huh, what the fuck was that? Well, that's a deal breaker for me. Because I can't, you gotta know how to come. You gotta know how to come. Do you finish it? Hell no.

You let her know. Absolutely. How you said, bro. Yeah, but I want to know how you said it. Yeah, but I don't have, y'all think I'm mean, but I don't have the guts. You got to ask what they did. What'd you do to this? I just leave the center of the place.

No, what's you, I'm saying, like, when you made it, what do you do to this? Because that way they don't know which way you're going. So then should I say, why don't know what you're like. I did how my mama do it. Why did it? How she did it? She told me to do this. told me to do this.

No, I'm just saying like, how did you do it though? He said what you do to this? When you made this, what was your question? Why is you asking me that? I'm just trying to figure out what you did. No, but she gonna want to know why you asked her. And that boy, she's on to you though. If she say that, then she knows that she doesn't like it,

I didn't like it, I'm just trying to figure out because you did it. I'm not, I haven't had it like this before. So all the p. All the rice gone. So what made you put them peas in the rice? in the right. That's the shit I'm talking about. You're going to damn run that shit,

that's it. That was the whole scene. First of all, when it comes to shit like that, people do weird shit. I have to see you eat by yourself a few times before I even, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, because I'm,

feed me might not be your responsibility. If I don't like a lot of the shit that you eat, I'm never. never going to like ask you to feed me. I take eating very seriously. Totally. Because you're a foodie.

Yeah. But only for the shit that I like. Right. I ain't out here just eating green tacos and shit. E-hoo? Green tacos and shit. What is that? They got some.

Oh, you might like when they had them. Just whatever. I ain't out here just trying shit. No, I'm not. I stick to the script when they come to food. Right. Me too. You're talking about my pat.

I'm just man and you fuck around and you get sick on the road that's some of the worst shit of the word exactly you need to stick there what the fuck you know you don't want to get sick on it I remember one time I bet I wasn't gonna make it back from New York I guess I ate the wrong shit man this shit had me so fucked up I was like I was so fucked up I was like motion sick through the whole flight Nick I thought I had a baby on the way or something I was on that bit I'm on the I basically asked for the last row because with nobody in like the back two rows I just need to be back here by myself. Oh, what the fuck.

Coming from cap? Man. Sick as hell. Nah. Yeah, nah. I stick to what I know, man. Like, you know, I've had people ask me, why are you eating Popeyes when we're here?

You can eat there at home. Well, bitch, all get it back at home, too, but I'm going to eat it while we're here. This is what I know. You just stick to what you face with. Yeah. Two wings. Creature habit.

Red beans, please. Sweet tea. See, them red beans is going to get you fucked up. Oh, Pepsi. I don't drink. Working in fast food made me skip to coke everything like that, boy. Coke is hard.

What wrong with red bean? Man, that motherfucker probably from three days ago. Man, now you just have to fuck up everything. Dang. They want to watch them. Documentaries all about

fan food talking to local. They want to have a little. They want to have a damn. Somebody that left clocked out. They didn't shut the whole restaurant down. They ain't turn no goddamn beans off.

He won't let you have nothing. Y'all left them beans on? I fuck the red beans. They're my favorite side. Nigger red beans go hard. Red beans and rice? Whenever it's on there, I'm going to order it. What do you eat when you go out?

No, fuck all that. Don't you worry about what I eat? Didn't I just tell you? Can we eat the same shit? And I just tell you that I feed myself? Nope. You eat JJ like a motherfucker. I already know what you get that pop of those then.

What? Red beans and rice and catfish. You don't get the catfish? Yeah, I get catfish, but I don't get the red beans right. That's what I get that popin' up. Yeah, yeah, them beans be a little. little too dry sometimes. I like pop it up.

First I go in there, I pop it out with some hen and coat and some gator bites. And then I browse the menu, just like I'm gonna get something different than the catfish. Then don't. I don't. You know what I just like looking for them. You know what I'm saying? You're trying to act like, so how does- And then I get the catfish out of the kid meal because I ain't that hunger no more because I ate the gator bites.

True. Hey man, we had to give you some of this player shit. What y'all got? We got you some of it. Oh, look at that man. Some of that real play. Look at that, man. Black people.

Black. Black on. Yeah. Man, y'all got goodies in here, man. Appreciate your brother. We got you a quarter zip. You're a grown-ass man. Look at that.

Yeah, you're a grown-ass man. This ain't my side, but I'm a rockin' though. There's another nigger hoodie right here, but it's nice. It's dope. We figured you know. This is what said black. They probably gave it to you so when you wash it'll fit. shit it'll fit. Now we'll give you the side. The nigger tried to judge he didn't know you he just

looked at the picture and he tried to eyeball it. Yeah yeah he definitely he gave me an extra We got you some hoops shorts too you might go to a pool quarter or something he goes to the jam Yeah, man. Thank y'all man this is all right yeah yeah Niggas got all kind of merch all kind of shit God damn lois man I'm proud of you man yeah man let him know where they can follow you at what you got coming man Malie S comedy M-A-L-L-K-L-L-L-E-L-S-comedy comedy on everything, Instagram, X, whatever it's called now, Facebook, J-Date, Farmer's Only, Nicker, Christian Ming, I'm on everything.

You're on Christian Meen? I ain't on there, I'm just saying. I thought, yeah, you're looking around and got a profile. A nigga still on plenty of fish. You still on plenty of fish. I'm on all that. Malikas Comedy, man. Watch the special, Laughing Vooda on YouTube right now, on Ali Sadie Page.

That's what's up, man. Got damn los. What's yours, man? Let them know where you at. comedian Justin Whitehead on everything. Justin R. Whitehead on Facebook. Yeah, you better get on here and promote yourself because, like I said, we've got $869 million.

Yeah, yeah. My special on Channel 85 also, Incredulous. If you don't know what that means, look it up. I ain't got time to take. You were supposed to, all right, whatever. All right, okay, well, cool. I told you, $869 million. That's crazy, dog.

One more time, yeah. One more time, dude. Hell yeah. That's wild. bro. J-O-N about 860 million oh. Yes, sir. Niggins said, 36 words. Total on all of.

Yeah, he got me had a microphone the whole time. He's hyped up just like me. He's like, what you call, Russell Simmons. Thank y'all for coming out. God bless you, good night. God bless you, good night. He'd better and try your place. Yeah.

Hell yeah. That's what's what's true. There you have it. What is too high of a body count? What's too low? Life is all about the highs and the lows. So don't get too high and don't get too low. Find a medium.

Get right in the middle. You see how it all go back to a little piece of middle? Don't let that go over your head. Like a condom. Good night. God damn it, we're fucking out of here in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Hey, guys, guys, great fucking work. I'm carrying this whole goddamn thing here.

Another podcast from some SNL late-night comedy guy, not quite. Unhumor me with Robert Smygel and friends. Me and hilarious guests from Bob Odenkirk to David Letterman help make you funnier. This week, my guest, SNL's Mikey Day and head writer Streeter Seidel help an a cappella band with their between songs banter. Where does your group perform?

We do some retirement homes. Those people are starving for banter. to humor me with Robert Smigel and Friends on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, everyone, it's Ryder Strong and Wilfridell from PodMeets World. And now the PodMeets Twirled podcast. We're two men who were completely clueless to reality TV, and we're gearing up for the season finale of Survivor. I know we annoyed a lot of our listeners by our severe lack of survivor knowledge. That is the point of the show. I'm just going to remind you. Ha ha, ha, who, ah, who. Again.

We are experts. Listen to Pod Meets Tworld on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Therapy is fantastic, but once again, it does not have a monopoly on healing. That's why I create the resources and that's why I create the community because I really just want you to have more access. On the podcast, Cultivating Her Space, Dr. Dom and Terry Lomax create a space where black women can show up fully and be heard. It's tough because we're suppressing our emotions and so many of us are like high-achieving individuals. listen to cultivating her space on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Your 20s can be so exciting, but they can also be really overwhelming, confusing, and honestly, just kind of lonely.

May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and the psychology of your 20s is breaking down the science behind the biggest roadblocks we face. I was six years into my career, the 80-hour weeks, and just the first one in, the last one out, and I ended up burning out. There was a large chunk of my 20s that I like was just so wanting to like be out of that phase out of my skin and I just like really regret not living in the present more. You don't need to have everything figured out right now. You just need to understand yourself a little bit better. Listen to the psychology of your 20s on the IHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.