The 85 South Show with Karlous Miller, DC Young Fly and Chico Bean - The New York City Roast Session W Karlous Miller DC Young Fly & Chico Bean | Ep.155

Episode Date: October 26, 2018

The coldest podcast posted up in New York City for two sold out shows at The Highline Ballroom. In the first show, Karlous Miller, Chico Bean and D.C. Young Fly do what they do best! Stand-up comedy, freestyle rapping and roasting the crowd. On SUnday night, right before their Breakfast Club appearance, the new Kings of comedy put it down in New York City. FOLLOW THE CREW KARLOUS MILLER - https://www.facebook.com/karlousm/ DCYOUNGFLY - https://www.facebook.com/DcYoungFly1/ CHICO BEAN - https://www.facebook.com/OldSchoolFool/ BILLY SORRELLS - https://www.facebook.com/billysorrells/ FAT AND PAID - https://www.facebook.com/Fatandpaid/ DARREN BRAND - https://www.facebook.com/darrenbigbab... CLAYTON ENGLISH - http://www.claytonenglish.com/ JOE T. NEWMAN - http://www.ayoungplayer.com CHAD OUBRE - https://www.instagram.com/chadoubre/ LANCE CRAYTON - https://www.instagram.com/cat_queso/ J.O.N - https://www.instagram.com/heeeyj_o_n/ CRIAG GRAVES - https://www.instagram.com/craigshoots23/ Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an IHeart podcast. Summer's here, and with the kids home and off to camp, it's easy for moms to get lost in the shuffle. On good mom's bad choices, we're making space to center ourselves with joy, rest, and pleasure. Take the kids to camp. You know what? It was expensive.

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The untold story of genius, betrayal, and the app that died so that TikTok could thrive. From overnight stars to the fall that no one saw coming, we're breaking down what made Vine iconic. Listen to Vine on the I-Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. In sitcoms, when someone has a problem, they just blurt it out and move on. Well, I lost my job and my parakeet is missing.

How is your day? But the real world is different. Managing life's challenges can be overwhelming. So, what do we do? we get support. The Huntsman Mental Health Institute and the Ad Council have mental health resources available for you at loveyourmindtay.org. That's loveyourmindtay.org. See how much further you can go when you take care of your mental health. Hey, Jay-LIN.

Fuck you mean I appreciate you all for coming All the way out here from Houston Hey me and wife have to get on a plane and come out here to New York and check out boys out 8 times Texas to be in the building, man Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, New York City.

What's up, New York? Nah, fuck that. We came all away from Atlanta. I said, what's up, New York? Y'all made it out to the 85 South Show experience. Y'all give it up with my boy J-O-N one time, y'all. We want to thank everybody for coming out. I should sit my drink down.

Appreciate y'all coming out here because it's cold as fuck outside. Y'all cold? Cold? But make sure you get a sweatshirt from me in the lobby. I got you covered. Don't worry about nothing. My name is Kat from the 85 South Show. How many of y'all watch the show on YouTube?

That's what I'm talking about. Y'all know what the fuck is going to go on in, right? I got Chico Bean in the house tonight, y'all. I got D.C. Young Fly in the house tonight, y'all. And I got the sense. Carlos Miller is in the building tonight, y'all. We got a special thing for New York. Y'all don't know, man.

We got love for y'all. I know y'all got love for the 85 South show. So make sure you check us out on YouTube. Tell two people. Tell your mother. Tell your sister. Tell your brother-in-law. You probably don't fuck what if you tell them about the 85 South show,

y'all can connect on a little funny y'all all right we're about to get this thing started who in here tonight is queens in the building is harlum in the building harleum in the building all right i got you is the bronx in the building oh the bx is representing y'all from the bronx i see you i see you i see you uh let me see long island in the building in the building no stat down in the building all right cut the music jail in cut the music jail in y'all ready get this show started all right y'all make sure you go on instagram log on today what i'm getting to it don't worry about i already know make sure you go to instagram twitter facebook subscribe to the 85 south show follow 85 south show who did i forget out there Is Brooklyn in the house? Hey, I fuck with Brooklyn.

I used to live in Brooklyn for two years. Who from Best I in here? Best I do or die? That's what fuck I'm talking about. My boy used to say, the brook. Yo, can, come to the brook. So we're going to make it happen. I lived in Brooklyn, man, y'all unique down there.

I'm from L.A. So the language is a little different. I used to tell my boy like, hey, homie, I'm serious. He says shit like, yo son, I'm dead ass, yo. Dad, I said, okay, Ron said, God bless you. I ain't know what to say, shit. But we're about to get this show started, y'all. Y'all give them energy, they're gonna give it right back to you.

You with me? Yes. This first guy I'm about to bring out, you've seen him on Wild and not. He's half of the old school rap battle. He's from Washington, D.C. Y'all, give him love. Start clapping right now. Right now.

Give it up for Chico Beat! New York. New York, what's up? Now I need more energy than that New York. What's up? Cut it off, nigga, cut it off. Yeah, what's up, nigger? Man, I love that shit right.

That was that motherfucker. That was that motherfucking A-Z. I want to cheer on sugar here, yeah. So lovely, so lovely. I miss that New York, man. I miss the New York when niggas used to dance like this. That's when New York, but I grew up with that New York now. You niggas is dancing different than New York now.

Now, you know the fucked up part? I realized something about that dance today. They stole that dance. That's how niggas used to dance in the 30s. You don't believe me, that's a Cab Callaway dance. Matter of fact, give me the beat. I'm going to show you. Watch from J.O.N. get his computer to work.

Watch this. All, wait a minute. You're making them nervous. Chill the fuck out. Come on. You can do it. Come on, Craig. Come on, Craig. Push the button, Craig. Push it. You got it? Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

I'll leave this. Y'all went alone. Y'all went alone. Y'all gonna get this shit together. Y'all got to see this shit. Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it, fuck it. We'll do it the next show. This nigga started playing the ESPN intro. I didn't know what the fuck that was. You can come in the motherfucker, go like this. There, it took long, nigga, took long. They were the anticipation that didn't build up

to what I thought it was going to be. Cut it off now. Now you got to sound like Ray's boom boom room in this motherfucker. And it feel good to be in New York, though, man, performing that motherfucking ghost club. They got us in the club ghost work at, nigger, this shit.

I love New York, though, man. This is one of my favorite. places in the world right here, man. I love New York. And the thing is, like, I'm gonna tell y'all something, New York. Like, every time I go somewhere and tell people I love New York, they always confused about why New York

motherfuckers are so mean. And I'm like, you gotta go to New York to find out why New Yorkers are so mean. Like, think about the shit that y'all got to deal with in New York. Like, imagine you at, you know, your dinner table, standing up, because you ain't got enough room in your apartment to put chairs

in that motherfucker. You and your family are enjoying a, you know, nice dinner that consists of macaroni and cheese, green beans, and chicken legs. And then you look down and the rat is enjoying your uncle's leg. Nigger, that shit crazy as fuck. Nigger, the Bronx got so many rats in the Bronx right now, Nick. You know you got a rack of rats when the nigger had the rat in the bacon, egg, and cheese bag. I was like, damn, he had the rat in a bodega bag, niggas. And then the rat died of natural causes.

You can tell it wasn't the motherfucking trap that killed them. It was a stroke that killed the rat. I say, man, this shit is different to New York. And y'all motherfuckers mean all the time. You can't even be nice to New York motherfuckers. Like, true story. The day when I got here, I went to the little chicken place to get something to eat. And the girl, you know, I gave her the money.

It was $20. It was like $6 left in change. I was like, you can keep the change, sweetheart. I swear to God, she was like, do I look like I need your fucking change, nigga? I'm like, nah, baby. I ain't saying I'm a butt you or no shit. Like, don't need your fucking change, nigga. Stupid.

Fuck is wrong with you stupid. Stupid. Fuck out of here. I'm like, yo, you gotta talk to a New York woman like you hate her to make her like you. Hey, bitch, give me my motherfucking change. My guy, that's what I'm talking about. My guy.

Fuck all that nice shit, nigga. All that friendly shit, nigga. Fuck is you talking about, nigga. Be mean to me, nigga. You don't help the homeless ass, nigga. We don't want no gentleman, nigga. Like, yo, this shit is crazy. And New York niggas, y'all niggas is the worst.

Y'all niggas is the worst, man. You can't even share bad news with a nigga from New York. Y'all don't give a fuck about nothing. You niggas would talk shit about anything. Be like, man, yeah, man, my grandfather just died. Yeah, that nigga was supposed to been dead. Fuck as you talk about. Nigger was 96 years old, B.

I was tired of I'm coming out the house, scaring the shit out of my kids, breathing all crazy, son. Rest in peace, but that nigga was out of here, B. He was fucking out of here, son. Word of your fucking mother, kid. Fuck out of here, son. Word up. For real, kid.

Why y'all nigga so mean in New York, man? You from New York, Jay? What part of New York you're from? Queens. Man, I rode the bus in Queens when I first time coming to New York. And I was like, nigga, there was a lot of shit on that bus, but a queen definitely wasn't one of them, that shit.

Nigger tried to sell me some fake Jordans on the bus that look better than the real ones. I was like, damn. What part of are you from Jamaica, Queens? Yeah. Nika, I went to the Jamaica Coliseum Mall, nigga. Woo! Nigger, you know a mall hood

when the mannequins pose like this. I'm like, shit, nigga, I ain't even know mannequins had knees. Nigel, when the mannequins got knees in Jamaica, Queens? This shit is crazy. Nigger, New York City, man. Let me ask y'all something, New York.

It's like, okay, so who's from Brooklyn in this bitch? All right. Let me find a young lady from Brooklyn. You from Brooklyn? What part of Brooklyn are you from? Who? Sheep's Head Bay. That sound like a shampoo brand.

What the fuck? Sheep's Head Bay. Remove the flakes. Where the fucking Sheep's Head Bay at? Bikoni Island. Oh, that ain't the part of Brooklyn. I'm talking about. I'm talking about where the niggas at from Brownsville and all that shit.

Right here. Alright, she's from Brownsville. What's up, my guy? What's up? What's you, baby? How you doing? I ain't talking to none of y'all in New York girls nights for the rest of the night.

What's up with you? So you're from where? You from Brownsville? All right, you grew up in Brownsville? Let me ask you something. Why is New York women so aggressive? Like, why are you with you think make y'all so aggressive? Shit, look, no timeout.

Let me tell you how aggressive y'all are. I'm asking you a question. This bitch over here. I wasn't even fucking talking to you, bitch What the fuck is wrong with you God damn That's what's wrong with y'all You don't know when the fuck to not talk and shit

I'm asking this lovely lady from Brownsville Why y'all so mean cause, nigga Because niggas like to ask for fucking changing shit And do that dumb shit Stupid So you say people make y'all aggressive, people. But y'all are the people. Like, I don't understand.

Like, okay, so you say people make y'all aggressive, but you grew up in New York. So y'all have been aggressive y'all whole entire life. Right, so why, when y'all go other places, you got to keep that shit, I'm from New York shit? Why, like, what? You don't do that? You lying like them.

I can tell you, bang, you do that. that bang you do that. That bang is too strong for you to not be from New York. You already know when the motherfucker from New York with that type of bang, niggas show up. What's up, my guy? What's up, my nigger? And y'all say, my nigger, like nobody else in the world.

That's my nigger right there, stupid. I love New York, man. Shit is crazy. You niggas are the du rag gods as well now. Like, keep it 100. Fellas, make some noise if you kept your doo-rack. on the whole ride up here and took it off in the car before you got out.

My nigga right there. My nigga right there. What my man there right there? My man right here, you kept your du rack? God damn, nigga. Oh, man, somebody get a shot at this nigga right here, man. Craig, go get a shot of this, nigga. I don't want the world to miss this.

This is the most ironic shit I've ever seen in my life. This nigga got a du rag on, and this headline is almost gone, nigga. Yo, what are you trying to... You're going to have one. One wave, nigga, that guy. You must go have one big ass wave, man. Why your shit look like that?

Let it go, man. You trickin, niggas. What is you trying to have wavy dreams? You need to let that shit go. Man, your shit crazy, dog. Man, god damn. Damn, dog. You live in New York with your headline like that.

You must be a gangster. Niggas let you walk around with your shit like that and ain't killed you yet. Them New York niggas joan different. They'd make you think they're your friend. friend. Hey, yo, my guy, come in, my guy. Hey, yo, son, I just, I want to let you know something because you're my man and shit, right? I fuck what you, cat.

You know what I'm saying? On some real shit, fuck what you, care. You're my dude. We grew up together, son. PS-143 and all that shit, care. Lord it up, son. No, your grandmother, son. Your grandmother, man, used to make us the fucking chicken wings and shit with the seasoning on them, care. You know what I'm saying? Shit was good. I just want to tell you, I fuck with you, son. I love you, son. Word to my fucking mother, son.

But on some real shit, my guy? I'm gonna tell you something real, cat. Son, your headline running from your eyeballs, B. Word up. Word up, son. Full sprint, son. Your shit back here, kid. You just shade that shit, son.

On the fucking block. Don't come back out here no more with your shit like that, be. Word the fucking mother, son. Shit is foul, kid. Word up. For real, though, my nigga, like, you just, you don't want to go bald? I mean, nah, it's too late now,

you made all that noise. I said, who kept the Durek on? Me. You should have kept it. You should have kept it on the rest of the night, nigga, you'd have been better off with the... God damn. That nigger shape up looked like a cul-de-sac.

That nigger shit, spin around in the circle. That motherfucker shit is crazy. And what's that with you? Why are you looking so mean, my nigga? You don't know, you're not having a good time yet? You ain't figured... You say what now? I just don't want you to snap on me.

Oh, he said, I just don't want you to snap on me. I ain't going to snap on you, my nigga. This niggas scared as fuck. It's the first scared New York, nigga, I ever met. Salute to you, man. Thanks for breaking the stereotype, my nigga. I thought all New York niggas was gangster. Not this nigga.

Fuck, man. I hope you don't see me, my guy. Damn, I'm not going to fuck with you, nigga. I just smile. That's the way you look at mean. I'm gonna fuck with you. You look like you having a good time. You're good.

Now I want to fuck with you since you're saying something. Alright, I'm just gonna say one thing, my nigga, just one thing. You got the, going out to the baseball game with your dad fitted on there. Why your brim belt like that? You bent your brim like that? He's trying to confuse the police. That's what it is. He like, move on, son.

Word up, son. We tell this motherfucker the shreds beat. Word to my fucking mother, kid. Hey, like, before I get out of here, I gotta ask, I'm gonna ask you since we're friends now. New York niggas say word to my mother. Is there specific word that they talk about that they mother know? All the word.

All the word. Word to my mother, son. What I'm saying, no. I feel like if you're going to tell me word to my mother, I should at least know the type of word that you talk about. Like, don't just, you know what I mean? Everything. Everything. Word to my fucking mother, son.

Is it any mothers in here? Any single mothers? What's wrong with that? I was just trying to find the single mother so I can fuck and then we can learn the words together and then when somebody say word to my mother I'm gonna be like yeah, word to my mother too.

Yeah, when I was in New York. Fuck the bitch. Word to my mother. Man, this shit gonna be fun tonight. I already feel it, man. We're in the motherfucking. We're in the goddamn city, nigga. I'm thinking, when I look around this bitch,

this is a big rich town. We just come from the poorest part. Hairline is leaning back. You need to cut it now. Ooh, your headline is going down. That was for him, not you, my nigga. Just let you know we're good. Your entire identity has been fabricated.

Your beloved brother, goes missing without a trace. You discover the depths of your mother's illness the way it has echoed and reverberated throughout your life, impacting your very legacy. Hi, I'm Danny Shapiro, and these are just a few of the profound and powerful stories I'll be mining on our 12th season of Family Secrets. With over 37 million downloads, we continue to be moved and inspired by our guests and their courageously told stories. I can't wait to share 10 powerful new episodes with you, stories of tangled up identities, concealed truths,

and the way in which family secrets almost always need to be told. I hope you'll join me and my extraordinary guests for this new season of Family Secrets. Listen to Family Secrets Season 12 on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The OGs of Uncensored Motherhood are back and badder than ever. And I'm Mila. And we're the host of the Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast, brought to you by the Black Effect Podcast Network every Wednesday.

Historically, men talk too much. And women have quietly listened. And all that stops here. If you like witty women, then this is your tribes. With guests like Corinne Steffens. I've never seen so many women protect predatory men. And then me too happened. And then everybody else wanted to get pissed off because the white said it was okay.

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I'm like, oh my God, it's go time. You actually sent it? Listen to the Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast every Wednesday on the Black Effect Podcast Network. The IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you go to find your podcast. Do you remember Vine? It changed the internet forever. And it vanished. in its prime. I'm Benedict Townsend, and this is Vine, six seconds that changed the world.

The untold story of genius, betrayal, and the app that died so that TikTok could thrive. From overnight stars to the fall that no one saw coming, we're breaking down what made Vine iconic. Listen to Vine on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Like I said, man, this is the 85 South Show. We appreciate each and every last one of y'all for fucking with us. They're coming out here and having a good time. But I'm about to bring my brother to the stage, man. You all know them.

You love them. Just got finished shooting. Howe Hot, too? You dig? I don't even want to... You already know what time it is with this nigga, man, so I ain't even going to waste no time giving you the accolades. I just need y'all to...

First of all, I'm gonna do it like a new... Hey, yo son, for real, everybody in this bitch. Write the fuck now, kid. Right the fuck now. Work to my fucking mother, son. Everybody right now. Stop clapping your fucking hands right now, kid. Stop clapping your fucking hands.

And make some noise for my guy, D.C. Young, Fly! To all the ladies in the place with style and grace, allow me to lace this different Cut that shit! Cut it! Hey! New York, what's hunting? It the mic on? Shit, I can't hear myself.

Ooh, what's happening? Y'all is lit in here tonight. Why that nigger with that forehead at? Where he going? Ha! Well, I bet your balls be like, Hey, hey, hey, they go the nigger with their head, hey, they got a, they got a, they got a.

Hey, real talk. Do you get a discount? Or do he charge you the whole thing? That's fucked up. How old are you here, though, G? You ain't telling me. He what? 31.

31. Damn. You sure you ain't 61, niggins? What part of the time you're from? East New York. What that's that? What that's it? That what Brooklyn, niggins look like?

Who asked for Brooklyn? That's your uncle right there. What you do for a living? You're a who? You a manager. That shit, scratch the UI. Bad in a... He's like, baby, my shit,

and we went back another end. He won another job. Y'all is crazy, boy. Who else in here? We got Brooklyn in here. She's like me. Queen. Queen!

Ooh, we, what? Look at Jersey! Let me tell you all some, I just came through that damn Jersey tunnel. I ain't know it was literally just, it was free, but motherfuckers are racing to get in the tunnel.

Like, this is, y'all traffic is bad as hell out here. I hate it. I can't stand it. All the ambulances and shit that just whee-hoo-hee. I just had to go up the one-on-off. Hey, look, that nigga dead. You might want to cut that shit.

You need to cut that shit off now, bitch. Been right here for 20 minutes. Y'all niggins got nine budd lines in here, boy. Y'all ain't buzzed? God damn, Migo, you're right, ain't you? What's your name, signor, seor? You got to say it twice. What's your name, signior de seigneur?

Who? Nino? So your name, what? Nino Sanchez. So it's like, all y'all's... So it's Sanchez like... Oh, Williams and Mexicans? Because there's a lot of Sanchez and Martinez's.

So, so... Ramirez. Oh, you're really a Mexican name? What you here? You're Dominican and Puerto Rican. Okay, where all the Dominican and Puerto Ricans is at? Dominican, you just... You just light skin with good hair, bitch.

What part of the town are you from? Harlem. Harlem. Oh. You said that, like you're in a suck of dick, bitch. You know the bed mood of them sold, I'm from Harlem. I'm from Harlem.

I know what that means. What'd you do for a little, Harlem? You were, ooh, eh? You're stressful. Don't get like him. You're a student. What school you go to? LaGuardia.

Bitch, that's... You go to the airport school? What? They got a school in the airport. Bitch, you're going to make me go to LaGuardia. Like, where is that school at? Biss that she's going... Where is LaGuardia?

LaGuardia College? Where is it? Like, I ain't never seen. It's in Highland City? Oh, Long Island. Oh, I ain't never been to Long Island. That was why. Oh, it's in Queens?

Why is y'all so spread? Ain't it the same damn thing? No. What's the difference? Please tell me, because all y'all mean is hell. What's the difference? What's the difference between the Queen's person? Break it down.

Listen, not, don't say no shit like that. I need specifics, like, tit is bigger, coochy wetter. What is it? Booty better? Okay, so this queen's right here. I'm gonna break it down. Okay, Queens is darker right now. What Brooklyn?

Okay, Brooklyn older. Brooklyn older. Okay, we're Harlem. Harlem. Harlem. Harlem freaky. Harlem is freaky. What I'm missing? Bronx?

Brought a Bronx at? Oh, no, I got to hear that one more time. What a Bronx? Y'all slow. They ain't know what, they say, ah, whew! Y' motherfuckers, it's crazy! I love y' y'all. See, I love when we bring real knickers out.

I swore on everything. I ain't never seen this place. What, this used to be, a Dave and Buster? This motherfucking lit up over that. gonna let up over there. I don't know if it's on fire or what. I'm scared. Okay, I ain't even know we, oh shit.

I ain't even know we had a balcony. Okay, what's on, balcony? Ooh, look at the people in the back, back they can't see you. They're like, what going on? They can't see. Oh, we got a standing room, but that what I'm talking about, man. I appreciate the love. Y'all don't understand.

We feel to come out here and turn the fuck up with y'all. You dig what I'm saying? You're having to get time because you think you're going to be like You know, they're all right You having to get time What's your name? Who?

Lay. What you do for a living? Lay. You're a who? You're a dietary worker? Yeah, I'm a hospital. So you're watching people on their diet, bitch? That's what you do?

So you're keeping people on their diet at the hospital? Yes. So you're the one that be walking in like, You took your pen today. Bitch, yes. Open your mouth, over your mouth. For real. What, what you from?

You from Brooklyn. Okay. Yeah, I see you been eating them fruit fry with your whole gram. She'd been killing them too. She thought, oh, my God. What's your name? What's your name, Auntie? Who?

Bless. What are you from? Bless. Your name ain't no damn blessed, bitch. Bitch. Bitch, you ain't talking to the police, bitch. And if you was, you caught, stupid-ass girl. Yeah, she got some weed on her.

Her name, Bless, that's right. Okay. I can be up here all day. I love y'all so much. I ain't like, we feel to come out here and turn the fuck up. I appreciate every last one of you motherfuckers. You dig what I'm saying. Real talk, man, real talk.

We appreciate y'all for supporting the 85 South Show. And if you think Chico was a motherfucking nut, and if you think I was a motherfucking nut, y'all, if you got to go pee, you better go pee now because this motherfucker I'm feeling to make you piss on your motherfuckin' self. Y'all make some noise for my dog, my motherfucking homie, Carlos Miller!

What's up my Who on the fuck with us? Ashest the ashes, dust, the dust, I'm bang. I'm with your fucking brains time, snitches. What's up, my niggas? We might let that whole shit play. They kicked that nigga out of America for this shit.

Turn that shit off before somebody get the shit slapped out of it. That's a gangstance record. gangstands record. We're in New York. What's up, biggs? Oh, look at you healthy niggins that grew up on one dollar pisa. I fucks with it. Oh, I love New York, because you can

always tell when a chick in New York is fucking with you, bro. If she will take two trains to bring you some pussy, you know she fucking with you. These New York women are aggressive as fuck, bro. They just be talking shit, your son, you mad pussy.

you don't try to fuck me, swear to God. I'm like God. What? I don't even like bitches who wear big boots. These bidsons we wear construction worker Thames with the plastic bottom. They're not the right tins. Biches look like the cable man

trying to fuck me. Stop! Oh, we are in here. feeling tonight. Watch the white lady. She might set you up. White women have been calling the police on everybody lately. What the fuck? What's up, G? You recording this shit? What's you putting it on? Snapchat. You ain't got no holes. Turn this shit off.

Grown-a-man on Snapchat. What the fuck can you say in 10 seconds, my nigga? Delete that shit and get on Instagram like an adult. The fuck is you doing? Snapchat-ass nigger. Probably got a Gangsta Snapchat name. Killing these niggas, NYC, underscore. Man, delete that bullshit and get on Facebook. Got a full fucking beard. Whatever.

This city shake me up, nigga. I got every goddamn thing going on. Crack heads is outside all night, doing push-ups in the street. These niggas is shaped like a motherfucker. Hey, man, you got a cop. I don't have shit. Go do some most. sit-ups by the trash.

Bro, this shit looked like Nino Brown living room. You know that scene? But the nigga called, uh, G. Money. You're making Tide Deals, G. Money. Y'all niggas ain't seen that shit. Let's see who at. What's up, bro? How are you living?

I ain't know you was fucking with the 85 South show. What'd you stand up for, my name? Was you about to do something? Oh, that's how you say what's up? you get tested that New York shit yo what's up sit down

you can say it from there no you don't what are you recording this for what you're putting it on and then what where the fuck

you're going to watch it that like nigga this is my footage this raw uncut unseen you can watch it on you ain't gonna see

this this me and Carlos anti-actor yeah I know the nigga we're a duo Somebody giving that nigger some pussy

It's hope out here for everybody It's all I'm saying Ladies, if you still got milk in your titty, say something You'll be sucking a titty too hard And some milk come out like, oh my God Was this vitamins? You put it? Every

nigger laughing didn't have some accidental titty milk before. We got to talk. talk about this shit because don't nobody give a fuck about us. Every nigga laughing and had that

and the teetit milk strong like a shot of patron took my shit. Bitch is that Limerita? You gotta stop drinking alcohol. If you're nursing, I'm drunk. You see how the joke

work? It don't work if I don't touch my nipple. It ain't funny. You see how comedy? All right, fuck it. It's not really dope when you explain it. Ma'am, your afro

is fucking righteous. I believe in you. God damn, when I saw that Afro you know the first thing I thought vote, I was like, got to vote Look at you What, you're a superhero or something? What do you do?

Black lady with the big afro, big ass hoop, it rings Ruin niggas lives? You're a preschool teacher? Oh, so you actually saved niggas lives? You're a good babysitter. What the fucking them kids learn at preschool?

Your son didn't eat any crayons. Moving them right to K. ready for K. He was a whiz at pre-K. The parents got it. Shout out to everybody who got kids. Can't help them with their homework. Bro, homework hard than the mother's boy. You can't do nothing. You can't tell them you don't know. They won't respect

you as a parent. So we some punk-ass parents. What we do? Cuss them out. Well, what the teacher say? Your ass in their sleep, you should have been goddamn listening. Figure it out. You went to school all goddamn day. No, I can't, though

I can't just leave my son God know how school is I went the goddamn school I know sometimes the teacher is the lying ass bitch I know my goddamn son Some of the shit they're saying he's doing He just not doing

Bitch are gonna call me the other day and say Well your son skipped the class I'm like bitch he in the goddamn fourth grade What the fuck did he go Was he not in line when you counted? everybody how to fuck this little nigger sneak out of line he got in trouble because he told the teacher her breath stink they want me to come down to the school i get down there this bitch talking her breath do stink i can't punish him for telling the truth i raised him right

I'm just at a different point in my life. I know that as a comedian, you have a certain responsibility. Do you see how every comedian is catching hell for the shit they say? Bro, you got to respect everybody. You don't know who the fuck going to get offended, bro.

And we live in a time where everybody want to be offended so goddamn fast. You can't even handle the people like people because they're mad already. I'm, early today, I'm at the fucking airport trying to get a Subway sandwich. I ain't even know the little dude in the back was part of the element.

community. I ain't know. Ain't nobody tell me. I didn't know that shit. Oh, they didn't add it some letters. Y'all lean up. It's element of P now. Everybody in that bit.

They add all kind of letters, my name. Br, I ain't even know. I'm just trying to. get a sandwich. He's going to look down in my cellar and say, mm, you want the extra meat? I was like, hell no. I don't even want the sandwich now. You can... I don't get a fuck. My real daddy

sitting right down, bro. That's my real daddy. That's my real daddy. That nigga going to drink all the heads up. and act a goddamn fool. Yeah, clap. See, I'll be looking at the nigga sometime and, like, I can't believe my mama fuck this nigga, bro.

Like, my mama was a sweet lady. He a whole street nigga. I know he was out smoking weed drinking Hennessy. Went home, fuck the shit out of my mama. Called this side hose. It's funny because it's real. Fuck you. This is

my life. That is my daddy. This is the shit we talk about. I don't know how many times that thing disappointed me. I was never supposed to be here. I made it. He can't believe this shit. He's like, nigga, I ain't really even do shit. That nigga made it.

I'm a cold-ass daddy. My other kids, they're all right. But this nigga here, I did my motherfucking thing with him. I'm at the point in my life one I'm a grown-ass man. He's no I'm a grown-ass man. Now that's like my number one homeboy. We talk about shit. fathers and son just, I have to remind this

nigga, you're my daddy. Some shit we ain't gonna ever speak on. Like, we watching the goddamn Beyonce one day. This niggas say, woo, that goddamn Beyonce fine, being a motherfucker. But you know who she ain't fighting in? Yo, mama. I was like,

Nick, I had a swing on you, bro. My fist balled up like that. That was... All right, let me stop, because all the niggas who grow with no father are getting jealous. Yo, fuck this nigga's father, son. What is all this father-son shit, yo? Talk about the pussy, man. Ladies, it's getting chilly outside.

Grow some hair on that pussy. You did not want that pussy to catch the flu. You out here with your fashion Nova skirt on with no hair on your pussy. Now you got new moya in the pussy. You get home, take your panties off, your pussy's sneezing. What the f***? Oh, he's sick. He's a little nose running.

What? I can't, that's why we created the 85 South Show. We need a platform where niggas can say shit. Like, because niggas go through shit, don't nobody ever... It's women in here right now that's feed niggas. Monastat 7. Won't even tell them. Won't even tell them.

Won't even tell him. Look how the women looking at me. He is fucking nasty. Am I nastier than the bitch is doing this? Yes, really. Y'all out here doing stupid shit, got niggins sucking deodorant titties. You ever suck the deodorants?

Ah, shit, my eyes blinked. What the hell? That is a strong titty. Why did you put all that secret on that teddy, man? You got to ask before you suck a teddy now. You ain't never suck the teddy that tastes like margarita salt? Margarita Salt. I'm the only one. I don't like the judgment in this bitch. I hope y'all ready for some more

extravagant shit. Shout out to all my niggas who's standing up. Don't lock your knees. You pass out. Move around, my nigga. Be agile. We appreciate the love. I just don't want no niggas passing out on this. Not like that anyway. Bro, you work here? Or you just, they fucked your order up.

This nigga is dressed in regular clothes. Niggas, that a cardigan? This nigga in the kitchen would a collar. Yes, bitch, the shrimp. Man, where the fuck are we? We got the white girl with the dreadlocks. This shit, I'm high. Ain't no way I'm really seeing this shit right now.

Those, that's not, it's all. I need to cut my shit out. Her ponytail looks like the Grinch finger, don't it? You're a rotten one, Mr. Grinch. Oh shit, they sent in the white dude with the ball head. He's about to shut the show down. Look, man, get the fuck out of here, bro. This club is owned by the element.

It's owned by the Elemento Pea community. I like this shit. They got the waiting bench from the Soul Food Restaurant. Bro, where you get this big-ass guitar from? That shit big, bro. Your entire identity has been fabricated. Your beloved brother goes missing without a trace. You discover the depths of your mother's illness

the way it has echoed and reverberated throughout your life, impacting your very legacy. Hi, I'm Danny Shapiro, and these are just a few of the profound and powerful stories I'll be mining on our 12th season of Family Secrets. With over 37 million downloads, we continue to be moved and inspired by our guests and their courageously told stories. I can't wait to share 10 powerful new episodes with you. stories of tangled up identities, concealed truths, and the way in which family secrets almost always need to be told.

I hope you'll join me and my extraordinary guests for this new season of Family Secrets. Listen to Family Secrets Season 12 on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. The OGs of Uncensored Motherhood are back and badder than ever. I'm Erica. And I'm Mila. And we're the host of the Good Mom's Bad Choices Podcast,

Brought to you by the Black Effect Podcast Network every Wednesday. Historically, men talk too much. And women have quietly listened. And all that stops here. If you like witty women, then this is your tribes. With guests like Corinne Steffens. I've never seen so many women protect predatory men. And then me too happen.

And then everybody else wanted to get pissed off because the white said it was okay. Problem. My oldest daughter, her first day in ninth grade, and I called to ask how I was going. She was like, oh, dad, all they were doing was talking about your thing in class. I ruined my baby's first day of high school. And slumflower. What turns me on is when a man sends me money.

Like, I feel the moisture between my legs when the man sends me money. I'm like, oh my God, it's go time. You actually sent it? Listen to the Good Mom's Bad Choices podcast every Wednesday. On the Black Effect Podcast Network. The I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you go to find your podcast. Do you remember Vine? It changed the internet forever, and it vanished in its prime.

I'm Benedict Townsend, and this is Vine, six seconds that changed the world. The untold story of genius, betrayal, and the app that died so that TikTok could thrive. From overnight stars to the fall that no one saw coming, we're breaking down what made Vine iconic. Listen to Vine on the IHart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Play some shit for these people in New York. They don't get to hear real authentic shit up here. a lot of times, but, you know, you really on some shit with New York

fuck with you. Because New York don't really like shit. You know, get the fuck you out of here, Shane. Take that shit back to 85 South, country-ass, nigger. Nah, but we had to come see y'all, man. This niggas up here still on Snapchat.

I had to be the one to tell the nigger. Your own homeboys won't tell you. But your grown-ass off Snapchat. Because there ain't no holes on Snapchat. The hoses on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. Get on there. They'll show you a nipple.

They ain't blurring out tities. I'm in relationship with hos in different cities. They be calling me like, when you come in to Dallas? I'm like I'm in New York right now. I'm at the palace. I might just order some shrimp. Might get the salad. It don't matter.

It's whatever on my palate. Ooh. This is coming off the head. Shout out to the ladies. that be coming off the head. Ooh, you get it coming off the head. The slow-ass niggas don't even know what I just said. Because it's the 85 South Show.

Hey, well, we love to get that mouth, though. Ooh, we all are in there bitch like a fetus. We came up here because y'all need us. This show be the coldest. Out of everybody, nigga, I'm the oldest, and I'm the boldest. Codest, nigga, you didn't ever seen. I won't hit it if the panties ain't clean I'm a country-ass nigger

I might get drunk on some country-ass liquor See everywhere I go I be taking my father If a nigga want a problem they don't even bother Where the fuck my niggas at I'm off the head like a fitty cow You know that I'm the ringer The cold-ass comedian Her ponytail look like the grinch finger

Nigger I can bring it back Me and Chico working on some shit for the lack. Yeah. I hit it from the front and the back. Cold nigger, because I'd be doing all of that. Everywhere we go, I look for big tities. Because that's what I do when I hit different cities.

Everywhere I go, I look for big tities. Because that's what I do when I hit different cities. I'm in New York with Carlos in D.C. All the bitches in the crowd say, hey, my guy. Hey, my guy. Hey, my guy. Hey, hey, hey my guy, all the bitches in Brooklyn is mean. You already know that 85 South Clean.

We in New York. I don't eat pork. Everybody in this bitch eating with a spunk. Because this motherfucker owned by black people. Come on. Say it's owned by black people. Come on. Say it's owned by black people.

Come on. D.C. What you say? Oh, shit. All day by bike, don't. Oh, shit. Let's go get my spite on. Come on.

Can I deuce to be a singer? But what had a girl left with the Grinch finger? Okay. Yeah. What she is? I think she in the kitchen. I think she's on the mission. I think she went to the bathroom because it was issued.

Hey. Hey. We in New York on our time. Low, did you see the nigger over their hairline? No, I didn't. Is it really fucked up? Man, he need to let that shit up. up said okay oh no it's a message these folks over in hell fighting for the section hold on white man

who you can't win oh he know them diggers all right take a sit okay dc what i'm peeves what's up in the balcony they can't see though hey they can't see though y'all digger can't see though okay chico yeah i was really digging all of that told the grown man he need to get them off the Snapchat. Hey, this nigga sent it videos. He probably with a cute face with the halos. Yeah. Snapchat, man, you're a trip.

You need to get the fuck off that shit. Yeah. And you know we get it big. There ain't nobody on Snapchat, but low-ass kids. Yeah. Okay. It's an 85 South show. It's the coldest

podcast. It's an 85. Turn, hold on. Stop, stop, stop, everything. Cut it off. We do shit like this. Yeah, this. Let's get the microphones leveled out. Somebody called that little white dude, Gabriel. This, what the fucking Gabriel?

Griffin. This microphone sounds like the dude off paid a full. You already know what it is. We in the house tonight. Yeah, we got my man Mitch in the building. It's going down. Everybody put your hands in the air. We in Harlem tonight, baby.

The ballers is out. You already know it's going down, baby. We put your hands in the house tonight. We got haul them in the building. This shit is fucked up. Hold on. Hold on, Chico. Let me holl at him right quick.

Griffin. Griffin. Can we get some mic? Can we get the volume? Yeah, appreciate it. Hold on. You hear him. He came in.

Griffin. Turn up, Chico. Let's do him. What Griffin is? There's Chico. Turn up D.C. Turn up D.C. He got number four now, nigger.

He has number four now, nigger, is what he said. All right. You ready, D. D. Nope, no. Uh-oh. Ooh. Try the other one.

Try the other one. Try the other one. Try the other one. Try the other one. Try the other one. That's the same one. Try the other one. They got it taste.

No, that big got candy on it. They ain't gonna put up. Oh shit. Check. check check all right we're in there now Gabriel where fuck you at Gabriel that's Griffin Griffin don't fuck with the mic stupid air but thank you that's why I want to be right there stop touching it quit touch of shit there we go tell you salute to our people up in the balcony yeah they're in the balcony got the good groupon seats in this motherfucker we fuck with y'all

that's the crime room it sounds like you and the goddamn trump that's what I'm saying they got me sounded like the nigga all paid the full. You already know what it is, boy, we got the money in the building. This shit. It's too much electricity in this little bit of a cluck. They got everything hooked up. The one little goddamn plug. We in New York, they gotta conserve energy.

There you go. They got all these speakers, and I can't tell you if this shit working or not. Some of them bitches don't work. Some of the speakers don't work. Two of these work. Yeah, some of them bitches just... Some of them bitches just...

Some of them bitches for concerts. It ain't for just niggas talking. We kind of just making it work. This is a hood podcast. We ain't really supposed to be here. Yeah, I agree with. This stage really set up for rock music. This really used to be a Dave and Buster.

Yeah. But they lost their permit because they had start tenders in here. I've seen a couple games outside. I know I wasn't tripping. Tell all the strippers in New York to stop DMing me for their protests. I'm not coming. They man. They man because the bartenders are making all the money.

See, the strippers, they can only get a little bit naked. But the bartender behind the bar pouring shot with her titty out, she's getting $3,000 a night. How'd the hair the bartender make him on money than the strippers? Because they don't let the strippers in New York get butt naked like Atlanta and shit. You got to show that pussy if you want my money, bitch. For real. These New York strippers don't even be naked.

I was just sitting in the club for two hours like, okay, what the hell going to happen? What the rest of it is? And then she just left and put her clothes. I'm like, I ain't she need to take the little nipple patch over. I ain't like the New York scribble because they dance before they ask like, do you want to dance? Some holes just be like, oh, I'm like, yep, that bitch dancing for free. I ain't say nothing. I made eye contact with his security and everything.

I'm like, uh-uh, I ain't after that. That's some shit. That's some shit. I really didn't understand. I was like, are y'all niggas in trouble? Are y'all on punishment? Hey, you fucking ride with New York strip club. That bitch come out with some Timberlands on.

You're like, damn. She must be from goddamn sheep's head. She really be from Jersey, though. I'm gonna ask you so fat. Jersey in the building. Jersey. Jersey. You know why you got a shout-out.

You know why you got a shout-out Jersey? You know what? You from the British City? She's like, no-n-no. All right, niggins, no-h. Don't hurt your neck, bitch. Nor. That'd be no-n-n-n-n-n-k.

No-n. No. No. I'm like, where you're from? You gotta shout out Jersey because them niggins smart enough to move to Jersey where you can get a parking spot and some cheaper rent and you can just take the train to the city.

Man, ain't no parking nowhere around this bitch. Uber can't need. That's why Uber just continued to drive. They can't park nowhere. They're like, look, if you ain't down you, I can't pick you up. Bruh. These Uber motherfuckers don't know where shit is. Got a whole GPS.

They dropping me off like I don't know where the fuck I'm going. This is this, my friend. D.C.1. Buddy, which one? We go around. Which one? I don't know. It's 7-8-9-1-2. I don't see 8-11. I almost got to find with the cab driver early. Nika, he ain't know what I was. This is the address. You put the address. Get out. I'm like, nigger. I ain't getting out. I ain't safe. You my ride, bitch. You're my cousin for right now. We got to go around tonight. So I figured, hey, you gotta keep driving to this nigga answer the phone, bro. I'm not getting at this goddamn car. It needs people, y'all.

Then they hit you with the shit and tell you, hey, my brother, it'd be longer than if I go around, I get stuck, so you get out here and walk around quicker that way for you. I'd be like, you'd pay you to walk. I could have caught the train to walk, motherfucker. Fuck that. They get their mind right when you tell them. You get paid, ain't it? All right, all right. Take your time.

Niggins, the cab drivers and the Uber drivers be beefing in New York, don't. They straight up fighting out. You ever get out in LaGuardia, nigga, and go to Gary, get into Uber and the cab driver. You let's cap, the cap, me cap, you get the fucking me, get the ride with me. No, I seen taking three. You're not about to kidnap me, motherfucker. Bro, I damn show road and some shit. I wasn't supposed to ride in.

What you ride in? Because the nigga, but he had the shit that looked like Uber, but the way the nigga approached me about riding with him was so shady, the nigga was like, bring in the ride. That's that shit they called the dollar man out here. Then the nigga was like, that dollar van. That's that dollar van. Chico, then the nigga was like.

All right, what do you say? What do you say? You know, right? They got them dollar bands out here. Hold on the niggins, like, I made the bag here, with you. That's all your shit right there? I'm gonna walk up here, go get in the car right there,

and I'm gonna walk back around. The nigger ain't asked me where I was going in that. We were down the down street. He was like, so where you going? I was like, nigger, uh... So you got in the car? Yeah, I rode all. You should be taking chances, bro.

You're stupid, but I squared the nigger up. The nigger about my side, and he had already had a big, already had a big ass scar on his face. I was like, he don't want no smoke. That's what they call him. He lost the last fighter. You don't been through too much. You just don't give a damn by life no more.

Yeah, man. I was in a hurry. Nigger, them dollar van. I felt like the nigga wanted the money more than more than he wanted value. You know how one cab driver would get out of the car. Like, he wanted a fighter nigga. I said, hey, my nigga, I'm in the back of this motherfucker.

Okay. He whoop your ass. He got to whoop both my ass. You tripping. Get your stupid ass and they car, bud. You in the wrong. Who didn't rowing in the dollar van in this motherfucker before? So you meant to tell me it's so many.

Some people didn't ride that shit to this show. It's $2 now. They're up the price on y'all name. So all they want is there's $2 and take you whatever? Nigger, it's the white van that they make the mentally ill people ride around in. A nigga that stole one in vans. And you know it's too many people in a place when a nigga just get a van and be like, y'all niggas ride with me.

Come on getting this motherfucker man. $2 and he take you wherever. No matter how long the destination. You have a road with that. You have a road with the African cab, nigger. He don't get off the first. He on the whole time. He on the phone the whole time

to the point where now you're concerned about the conversation with it. I don't know what this family going through. This nigga went from yelling to speaking soft. I'm still stuck on the nigga

pay you $2 and he take you wherever the fuck you want to go. In a van. It's a van. You know how high gas is outside? Ain't no nigga saying give me $2. I'm going to take you the butt.

Show me. But that's the thing. The nigga ain't paid for the van. The van stolen. Ain't nowhere in the world no nigga got no problem. to get no van in New York. Fuck, you can't park a Prius in New York.

Fuck, he put in that van. That nigga, went and jumped the enterprise fence and stole a van and then made a business out that motherfucker. I don't trust no van. This is a hudson in that city. That's why I love this city, because you don't have to pay for shit at regular price.

All you got to do is disagree with a motherfucker, it is. 1115. Bullshit. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Okay, my friend. Me and you make deal. We make deal.

How much? 7.50, okay, okay. You come here all the time, I know you. For you. Only for you. Only for you. Only for you. Only for you. I don't know what the hell you're shopping that. They're taking my money. They're like, shit, niggins. 11.50.

Well, you're going to be cold. You're fucking with the wrong people, bro. Well, you be shopping at, food? The bodegas, bro. Yep. But I heard that don't be real lamb. Bruh. No.

So. And I ain't eat that motherfucker. You know what? enough about New York that I ain't shopping in the bodega if it ain't a cat in that motherfucker. If it ain't a cat in that bitch I'm not going in there.

The cat solidifies the bodega. If they don't have three rows of du rags, get the fuck out of them it's supposed to be duress or Irish Spring and Irish Spring So. Irish Springs or all that. Got had an Irish. Bottle opener super glue.

Just random shit screwdrivers, light bulbs. Shit you might need at the crew. Oh, man, her shit with the almonds. A bootleg iPhone charger. With the Android end just in case you change your mind. And I don't see how y'all niggas smoke anything in New York. They charge you y'all to smoke up here like that shit just became legal.

Nika, we went to go get some black and miles. Motherfucker said, eh, that'll be $15. I was like, no the fuck it won't. They don't they have swishers. They make you smoke out of them goddamn. What that pussy leaf? What that shit is? That look like a pussy lips.

Nobody want no fauna leaf, yeah, look like pussy lips. Like smoking that shit. You hit a fauntleteaf and immediately go, and your son, word to my muck. What the fuck, bitch? Everybody don't smoke backwoods. That shit like four cigarettes, man. I got ass, my man.

That's not playing. I smoked some shit with some wintech with some niggas and I was talking like they were. That's what I said to make you talk like New York, niggas. That shit hit me right here. I hit that bad wood, that, that, that, That brown bag. That original. Smoking that tree bark,

nigga, that shit strong than a motherfucker. Ha! Nick in the road this blunt up in some tree bark, nigga. You ever hit that backwood getting light head? That's up a wrong, too. Shit, boy. I don't like the way the backwood

make a nigga cough, nigga. I do cough off a blunt. That backwood... Ah! Ah! Y'all get made me think about some shit. Maybe God punishing us for being niggurish and smoking weed out of some shit

that tree ain't supposed to be smoking with the veins on it. Man, you ain't supposed to be smoking shit with the veins on it. That's a real leaf came from a tree from somewhere that got some shit on it that make a nigga... And you look like you're about to get finished in Mortal Kombat, nigga.

That nigga doing it. That shit, that shit makes a boy. Finish him. That shit making a nigga lean, boy. Finish him. Man. Hey, and another question, New York. How come all of them

niggas that be selling them comedy show tickets in Times Square really selling weed? What the fuck did they get the comedy show tickets from? Every time I walk past one of them niggas like, yo, you coming to the comedy show? Got that sour diesel for you, though, son. Sour D? I'm like, nigga, they still make that? What the fuck, man?

You don't get me around the corner, son. Only New York niggas that sell you weed in a dirty bag. I'm like, nigga, you'd have had this bag for a minute bro. I see the stress in the bag. The not ain't even, they're not loose. All this air in the bag,

you've been pinching out this sack. I'm not giving you what you ask for, bro. Lose, do you know how funny that would be if you bought some weed from a nigga? He put the bag out and just pour the shit in your hand, zip the bag back up and put it in his pocket. Yeah, that's my only bag, son. You ain't, you ain't never had to ride three stops with a

three-five in your hand on the train. Well, you're stupid, bro. The nigger who re-ewed the That was me, niggas. You didn't reuse bags, these. I always tell the niggum, I'm like, hold on, I need that bad, bro. You can't buy your weed from the Jamaican niggas, bro.

They act like the police come. As soon as the weed go from them to you, hurry up, the police are come. I got them. Who told them? They wasn't over here earlier? They just pulled up, my name. That's the thing about every street around his mother.

Do they? And it's crazy. New York is such a crazy city because it got all the different types of people in it and they y'all all got your own section of the city. Like, what's that? What's that? That's what I can tell you what that is. You go over there and them old Puerto Rican niggas man, them is some of the funniest niggas you are ever seen. And you know, Papa, you tell me you what you do. I just do what I need to do. You tell me you need to come here. I take you there, you go there, we be there together. Like, what the fuck did you just say, Juan? The number one thing you got to learn about New York City, bro. Mind your motherfucking business. It ain't no matter what the fuck goes on, long as that shit go on over there. And you got to walk fans, too. Because there's a lot of shit that go on in New York that will offend you other places.

Like, you might walk past three white people arguing, fuck this nigger, fuck that nigger, well, fuck this nigger, too. Like, that ain't got shit to do with me. I don't know what the motherfuckers was doing earlier, but if I heard that shit, well, where I live, I would have said something, but that's them. You got to take a training course to live in New York

because it's certain shit that you don't learn until you get with a motherfucker who's from New York. Like, when you ride the train, nigga, I was riding the train one time, right? And it was crowded than a motherfucker. I'm like, nigga, this shit is packed. And then there was a cart

with nobody on it. I said, oh, I'm gonna get on the empty one. Nigger. Why the fuck you do that? The motherfucker open up. I get on the bitch door closed, do, and then I look back and that homeless, nigger, was in the back of that bitch.

Nick, I had to ride one, it only took one stop. I was in that bitch coughing like I hit a black and mouth. Damn, damn, you might turn it to a walking man. That nigga was on a different level. That nigga had 90 blankets. I said, damn, it was a summertime.

I'm like, damn, what the fuck he's doing with all them blankets? That nigga had the whole car staked. What is you doing on the train? Nigger, I didn't know. You know that shit ain't safe, boy? fuck with the train and I thought I was mad I'm like these New York niggas stupid they gonna pack all in here with an empty cart let me get my ass on the empty cart nigga I'm in this bitch

that motherfucker nigga soon as the door closed I heard the Super Mario music when you go down the tube da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da I'm like nigga I'd never do this shit again that's why you need that's why you need the New York training course Carlos what's up melbourne new york training course he wasn't supposed to be on the train chico I'm too claustrophobic to be on the train I was on that bitch and it was packed, bro. I seen it. Some gay niggas get on. That nigga didn't hold on to no rail.

He just put his ass up to it. That's when I stopped riding the fucking train right there, bro. Hey, man, what the fuck is wrong with this thing, man? I want to be on careful laughing at that shit. People laugh at it because they know. Y'all laughing because you know that ain't some shit you can make up. That niggins said the gay niggins. to set his ass on the poke.

What? What is you looking at, nigga? The bitch, man, stops in everything. This nigga just on that. Whoops. Whoops. Whoops. Yo.

That is crazy right there, nigga. Do you know how fast them trains be going? Niggin, not moving it on. Oh my goodness! What? Bro. Yo. That is fucking hilarious.

I only add it to the joke. I did not come up with it. Hey man, you can't make that up, though. My nigga had to see that. That ain't even something you can envision until you see some shit like that. I got off at the next time. I just seen it in my head.

That nigga must have had on some. My nigga, that nigga just... I had to get the fuck out of there. How many stops did you see this shit? That next one, I got off. You just... Fuck it, I walked. I walked, I had to get my mind right.

Oh my God. Oh, my God. The time's unchanged, bro. You don't know what you might see out in these streets. That's why it fells, before you leave the house, you live with your lady, take a little pussy juice, dab it behind your ears and shit. It keeps them spirits away from you. They don't...

around, you're like, ugh, my eyes burning. It smelled like some pussy or something around here. Somebody trying to infiltrate. You just dab a little bit behind your ears. Oh, my God, man. That fucking

train pole, my nigga. That is the funniest shit I have ever heard in my fucking life. I'm not going to let y'all not acknowledge how fucking hilarious. A gay nigga not holding on nothing on a New York train

and putting his ass on the pole nigga? Oh my God. Somebody make that cartoon, nigga. Jesus Christ. The funny thing is how the niggas gonna make that cartoon? They think we don't see them stealing shit from the 80s and by that same. I don't think about that shit for about too much.

And no, you know what's fucked up now? Every time y'all get to see a gay person get on the train, y'all going to be like, let's see if he hold on the side, nigga. Let's see if he hold on. Let's see if Carlos up. Nope, nope, he was right. Look, he ain't touching nothing. Bro, I just see shit different.

Like, today at the airport, I saw this stud girl waiting in line to get in the women's bathroom, and she was the girliest I've ever seen in a stunt. She was like, please, hurry up, man, I'm going to pee pee so bad. I'm like, oh, you turn back to a little girl, you said pee-pee. Oh, my goodness.

I don't be looking at stupid shit, bro. Oh, my God. I feel like we should take them to church, amen. Man, we got to talk about it. We got to play some Brother Carlo. Hey.

Hey, brother, what he said? Hey. I saw this nigga on the train. Wasn't holding anything. He had his ass on the pole. It stopped and he go. I seen that shit, Chico. Oh, my God.

Bruh. This is the 8th South show, bro. You know who this podcast is for. No, I don't know if we're going to, that, that's the greatest, that's, that's, that's, that's the greatest ever right there, man. No. That's the greatest shit I've ever heard in my life, my name. Oh, my God, dog. I told you, look, the nigga drunk there.

Oh man, hey, hey, pop, pop, pop, pop. You crazy, nigga, that's what he get it from, pop. Pop, that nigga is something wrong with that nigga, man. Jesus Christ, man. That nigga, pop's a hell no. Hell no, hell no. I know it came out of nuts, but no, that was just too much, son. Oh, shit.

I don't know how God allowed you to be there to see that shit, but that were too much now. Shit now. That's my daddy, man. And they're crazy here. How y'all feeling tonight? How y'all feeling tonight? Y'all fucking with the 85 South show.

Shout out to all the ladies in here who got an IUD. That means she can't get praying. Yeah The bitches can't get pregnant Ooh, that's like that That's the groove Yeah Girl can't get pregnant

What you say? She can't get pregnant Because she got a IUD IUD What that is? What that is? What that is? And she can't

You got an IUD Say what? Say what that is? Say what that is. What that is? What that is. She got the IUD Oh, I get nut in that thing

You telling me I get nutting that thing Because she got an IU ski ski that's nutting that thing Because she got an IUD Oh I could nut in that side Got the IUD She said with my rubber I thought I could trust her Uh huh

Didn't I have fucked her I ain't want to put it on I ain't think I did not wrong Everybody did it before IUD You know she got the IUD She said got the IUD IUD

IUD She got that IUD She can't get IUD She got that IUD She can get pregnant Okay, say that this is something that I must explain. I have a week pull-out game. So I like to only see bitches who got IUDs.

If you got an IUD, baby come and fuck with me. And you know just what it do. If you got an ID, I'm a skeet in you. Skeet, skeet, skeet in you. Skiets, skeet, skeet in you. I said that I'm a ski ski ski I said that I'm a ski to you I said that I'm a ski in you ski ski ski all in you ski all in your feet said a skis all in your ski all in your ski all in you

said I said I thought I'm gonna ski all in your ski all in you said I thought I'm about a ski all in you ski all in you ski ski ski skate all in you Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, that's okay. Yeah, yeah. That's all right. One more time, D, C, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski, Ski in you, said I'm about to Ski in you. skis ski in you fellas if you ever say ski in you skis in you niggins don't ski in you ladies if you like to get skis that in then say ski in me oh y'all bullshit in new york y'all faking

why y'all act like y'all like to get nut it in ladies why you like to pretend you know damn what you like to get that dick when it's wrong and get to see you He put inside your jaw and your Gucci hole. You know that you's a hole. Won't you let a nigga fuck you raw so I can give you this ball sauce? You've got an IUD down now. Put your hands up in the aisle. You got that IUD down now.

Put your hands up in the aisle. You got that IUD down now. Put your hands up in the aisle. Got that IUD out now. Put your hands all in the aisle. She got an IUD IUD She got an IUD

She got that Skis-S-S-G-S-G-S-D This shit right here is so cold This shit right here so cold This shit right here so cold We saved my head On the flam-Bee pills Because my girl got that IUD

That's just what it is Go and get the strings cut. They were scratching my nuts. She had to get the strings cut. They kept scratching dick up. Hey, ladies, I don't like... No more kids off in this house. I don't like how y'all pretended.

And so more kids off in this house. How y'all pretend that y'all don't like to get skeeted in? No birthday party. Yeah, ladies. Don't act like... No after school, no. Don't act like you ain't never been fucking with a nigger. and he hitting it raw

Then he goes like And you be like Oh Some of these women out here They rowing us too They be rowing us too Women be rowing us too Hey

Always looking at me After I ski ski Asking me them questions Talking about like Did you nut in me Bitch yes I did Now you're in the bathroom

On the toilet With your legs straight out talking about oh my god it's so much coming out yeah i be skiing in you and i don't even know why put so much meat in my girl she looked like a oatmeal cream pie yeah because i'm a nasty dick i come a nasty dick sleeping in the west pot i'm sleeping in the west pot i'll sleep in the west pot I'll sleep in the wet spot with the fan on in the summertime, yeah. I'm sleeping in the wet spot, I'm sleeping in the wet spot. Some of y'all ladies ain't got no wet spot because the coochie is real dry.

Say, yeah, real niggas sleep in the wet spot. Skays, skate, skate, skis, skate, skis, skis. But the pregnancy rate just dropped by 17% percent. You say what? The pregnancy rate just dropped. We're promoting safe sex and adulthood over here. Yeah. The 8.5 South Show.

IUD. IUD. IUD. Oh, oh, oh, that IUD. I'm playing parenthood. I do, yeah, yeah, IUD. IUD. Because they carry with a skis, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze,

some women are going to get jealous. We got to do the remits. We got to do the remits. She be taking them to the skills this night. Some ladies still take the pills. Skis-Sk-Sk-Sk-Sk-K-Sk-K-K-K-K-K-K-K. Yeah. Baby told you got the I-U-D, I-U-D.

And the ladies got the I-U-D. So all my niggins listening. If you don't have a baby mama, don't get one. I repeat, if you don't have a baby mama, don't get one. Why you don't need no baby mama knows? This shit's like being in a game. You can't get out. You got to die out.

That's a hell of a contract. Just imagine giving six, seven, eight, nine, a thousand dollars a month. To a bitch, you don't even want a fucking number. You should be able to report every child's report. Every time your baby mama try to fuck you, they take $150 on. They gotta give us some kind of incentive Every time you call, yeah, the bitch tripping, $30 on They'll be telling niggins to get out and vote

We've been boated. Shit been fucked up. I don't know if I'm going to endorse that no more. Y'all do that shit, I do the political shit. from Planned Parenthood. That's the IUD with a D-U-I-U-I-D what a shoot-du-ee. There's a I-U-D with a G-E-D with a G-E-D. Oh, yes, I-U-D when a day you are.

You sing that shit, D-C. Oh, got the I-U-D with a G-E-D with a G-D. What, you don't make a song about the I-U-D? Skis-K-S-K-S-K-S-K-S-K-S-K-S-K-S-K-S-K-S-K. Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis, Skis Skis. Ooh! I U-U-D. Look that nigga right there has a flashback.

IUD. I UD. Sing it with me, IUD. Oh, that's an IUD with a D-U-I. I-U-D with a D-E-D. That's the I-U-D with a D-E-D. She got the I-U-D with a G-U-D. Where can I buy one of those IUDs?

Three pieces in here keep looking at me. I'm gonna buy you one, and I'm gonna buy you one. Which one of you hold gonna let me nutty you for fun? Yeah. Which one are you ladies in New York tonight? Try to get nutted in New York tonight. How many ladies? many ladies in new york yeah all night hey if you're trying to get nutting and scream out loud

i'm still pulling out i got one right here i'm still pulling out who's that scream right there big girl big girl big girl you're gonna get nutty-in-out i'm still pulling out i'm still pulling out i'm still pulling out hey big girl says you want to get nothing out I think I'm pulling out. Oh, I think I changed my mouth. Big girl, I still pulling out. Big girl, big girl. Can't trick me.

Be girl, big girl. Can't trick me. Nope. Hey. Can't trick me. No. Hey. Can't trick me. No.

Hey. Can't trick me. No. Hey. Can't trick me. No. Hey. Can trick me.

New York City. It's same. New York City. Shout out to all the women. I changed my mind. Shout out to all the ladies in here that can wear white panties all day. And you take them off and they're still white. That ain't nothing but magic right there.

Some of your lines. I think I changed my mind. Some of your line like a motherfucker you live in New York. You got to walk to team blocks just to get to work. That day is running. That pussy is dripping Up there in the balcony, anybody up there? Pussy smell like outdoors

And the pussy smell like outdoors That pussy smell like outdoors That pussy smell like outdoors Y'all y'all y'all. Y'all be n'em. Smell like something. Strip. Smell like Deng Street.

Smell like Dizzy's drink. And the pussy's got like pussy. Smell like Brow. Smell like brim. Smell like brim. You. Y'all niggas retarded, man.

Why the pussy smell like zoo dirt. Ooh. Ah! Why the pussy smell like zoo dirt. Smell like the Lincoln Town. No. Smell like the Lincoln Town. No.

Smell like the Lincoln Town. smell like the Frederick Douglass Projects. I said your pussy smell like a project elevator, yeah. Say your pussy smell like a project elevator, yeah. Say the pussy smell like a project elevator, yeah. And it don't work. And it don't work. And it don't work.

Say the project elevator. And it don't work. work in the project elevator gotta take a step in that project elevator got to take a step get a walk on hey man hey you don't keep that pussy clean that pussy broke like the McDonald's ice cream machine damn it ain't never home name that da that uh-u-oh that um you're fished

but it broke down like ice cream Ice cream machine Broke down with an ice machine Say that pussy broke like the McDonald's Ice cream machine Yo Said that pussy broke like the McDonald's Ice cream machine

Said that pussy broke like the McDonald's Ice cream machine Oh I like that shit right there Ice cream machine What's that? Everybody's the ice cream machine Can we go on one time

Say ice cream machine God damn Would you tell us say Ice cream machine Yeah This is the 85 South show We do rebuild pussies You can come over here

Get your pussy completely rebuilt New starter New alternator, new transmission Put some new plugs and wires on that ass That's what we got going on We appreciate all the love and support And before we get out of here Before we get out of here

I gotta say this Say it It's got to be said I said about that gay nigga on the train Still the funniest Still the funniest shit ever man Say the niggins said he grabbed the pole with his ass sheets and didn't hold on to no rail

grabbed the pool with his ass sheet and they didn't go no well I say Why did you make me think about that again I ain't gonna never stop laughing Then he said his butt cheeks was on the pole What else happened? And they wouldn't let go

Up, that he swing right And the swing left Nigger on the train like this Nigger on a train like this Hey, say the nigger on a train like this Nigga on the train like this Yeah, stupid Chico, you know what that nigga had

when he did that? What? Ice cream machine You are stupid, man. Hey, that shit hard right there, then. Hey, man! Hey, every boy, I gotta get everybody to the ice cream machine one more time. We gonna platter with that shit.

We gotta do this shit, this for the show. This for the door right here. This for the people today in New York. Give you. Say, ice cream machine. Everybody say ice cream machine. Ice cream machine. Everybody say ice cream machine.

Everybody say ice cream machine. Ice cream machine. Everybody said ice cream machine. ice cream machine oh that shit hard ice cream machine that shit so hard I said ice cream machine play that shit bro okay okay how about you get your side I get my oh yeah we over here this is my side we can't do this shit right here we got to turn we got ready we got to get live on this side you want to kick it on fly kick it on Just this shit.

What side do you get? You know what my side I got to say. Oh, okay. All right over this side. Everybody. Ice cream machine. Sing. Ice cream.

Everybody say ice cream machine. My side. Ski, ski, ski, ski, ski right now. I say skis, ski, skis, ski, skit right now. Everybody say ice cream machine. Everybody say ice cream machine. Everybody say ice cream machine. Here we go ski ski ski ski ski right now

Ice cream machine nigga Oh y'all niggins is stupid Hey man We love y'all New York man We love to shit out y'all man This is the 85 South show I am Chico V.

That is Carlos Miller And this is D.C.O. Fly We love y'all, New York. Let me you say ice cream machine. Sing it. Ice cream machine. Everybody say ice cream machine. Over here we go.

Ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski right now. Ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski right now. Say ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, ski, right now. Same time, everybody. Ski-skit right now. Over here. Ice cream machine.

Hold up. Ice cream machine. Now y'all go. We love y'all in New York. We love y'all in New York. Oh man, that is one of the shit I have ever heard. My name. I swear to God, though.

That's the 85 stars of the best comedy joke of all time right now, bro. Of all time, dog. That shit was so funny. It was so funny. It was so funny, everybody knew it was so funny that the joke got to laugh about four or five minutes. Without anybody even saying that, bro. I didn't control.

Two. Dad one and the Grinchfinger pony tail. Oh yeah. Nigger. I could control myself. Man, that shit was fucking hilarious, though. I would like, man, this nigger. Then the rear actment of what the shit looked like, this thing.

Oh, my God. Do you know how far that it is? Man, yes. The thing is, I ain't know where the nigger was going. That thing said he put his ass on me. Bro. Wow! Oh my God.

Oh my God. I did that. Hey, dude, you know everybody was saying that, I had one. I said, get, keep, keep, he, keep, skit, skit, skit, skit, skit, skit. Right now, ice cream machine. Yeah, I appreciate you. You know, ain't no work, bro. I'm sure.

Oh, my God. Oh, man, you say ice cream machines. So funny, bro. You know, you know, bro. Oh, my God. Oh, man. Brow, you know. We out here with this joke material, man.

You're fool, man. I was so funny. That shit was so funny. That's important. Well, I ain't turning my back. I said, I'm adding to the joke. I'm laughing. Listen, man, that shit is laughing.

Oh, my God, dog. I'm gonna talk about it. Listen. We walked there, put it back, and you can see how I drop that guy that microphone where this was like, this nigger is the craziest nigger alive, man. I'm turning my head.

I was the craziest. I was already knew what was. I was already laughed before he got the joke. He said the niggins, he said his butt was on the pole. And when he moved, I was over there. I said, man, this dick, he gets stupid, man. Nigger, that's the crows, nigga, that's the crows, nigga. And they always say they wonder what I'm going to say.

Oh, nigger. They wonder what I'm going to do. I ain't the worst. I ain't the worst. You got to think about a nigga who got wheels among this retardant shit. Where the fuck cat is? I ain't the worst, man. Where is that?

Hey, man. Cat got the good. They're about the bitch joke. I heard. Appreciate it. Summer's here, and with the kids home and off to camp, it's easy for moms to get lost in the shuffle. On Good Mom's Bad Choices,

we're making space to center ourselves with joy, rest, and pleasure. Take the kids to camp. You know what? It was expensive. But I was also thinking, you have my kid. This is kind of priceless. Take her, feed her, make core memories. I don't have to do anything.

Main thing, I don't have to do anything. To hear this and more, listen to Good Mom's Bad Choices from Black Effect Podcast Network on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Do you remember Vine? It changed the internet forever, and it vanished in its prime. I'm Benedict Townsend, and this is Vine, six seconds that changed the world.

The untold story of genius, betrayal, and the app that died so that TikTok could thrive. From overnight stars to the fall that no one saw coming, we're breaking down what made Vine iconic. Listen to Vine on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. In sitcoms, when someone has a problem, they just blurt it out and move on. Well, I lost my job and my parakeet is missing. How is your day? But the real world is different. Managing life's challenges can be overwhelming.

So, what do we do? We get support. The Huntsman Mental Health Institute and the Ad Council have mental health resources available for you at Love Your Mind Today.org. That's love your mind today.org. See how much further you can go when you take care of your mental health. This is an IHeart podcast.