The Adam and Dr. Drew Show - #1751 Miss China

Episode Date: July 28, 2023

Adam and Dr. Drew explore more unique topics with Jiaoying Summers as they discover she was Miss China in 2014. She elaborates on beauty ideals in China, as well as other details that will likely involve more TikTok jail for anyone who isn’t already there. Please Support Our Sponsors: SimpliSafe.com/Adam2

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Get it on. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks for telling a friend. We love to have you. Doctors, board of certified physician, addiction medicine specialist, Zhao Ying Summers is back with us. She's from China. She was born at home.

She's now a very funny stand-up comedian in the States. Hates her mom, so we bond over that. Tiger Milf is the name of her podcast. And was also a beauty pageant winner. Miss China 2014 International Beauty Pageant. Queen of the Universe. Queen of the universe which is a lofty title that you could never live up to but i'm a trans lady sounds like a trans lady competition queen of the universe it really does um so um let's talk about this. I have a question.

Yes. I have a, before you get into the pageant culture and stuff, one of the things I noticed about Zhao Ying is she, she glosses everything with this beautiful, delightful smile and happiness, a face. And then we'll say some horrible things underneath that and my question

is is that uh and funny things too horrible funny things and is that something you learned through the beauty pageant thing because i i went to the desert with hannah brown who was the bachelorette and she did if she was a miss alabama and she was smiling all the time too it could we could not make her stop and so my question is is it is that the pageant thing or is that what you did to sort of hide from your mom? You know, any real feelings? I think both the pageant thing,

you're always smiling and master my face for my mom. Mainly I spent so much money on the veneer. I kind of want to show it because that's the only thing I left from the divorce. Like he took everything. So I still have the veneers. Well, they're great. They're beautiful.

Very nice. So, yeah, the pageant world, it's very bizarre to me because I grew up in North Hollywood and my family couldn't have been further away from that world, which I think there are healthy sides of a pageant. Obviously, everything goes too far, and it gets a little weird at some point. But, you know, the talent part of the competition and all that, I'm fine with that.

What was your talent? I don't have any. We were dancing, i i was very shitty but also the pageant is like a pageant that's made in china is not a real pageant it's like this miss puerto rico she uh decided to make a pageant and so she just talked about uh uh she want to make a pageant that's gonna be the best best pageant. So that's the pageant she did. It's not Miss World or Miss Universe. I can't enter because I wasn't American.

So I didn't have... Did they emphasize... I know China likes you know, like you said, on TikTok, they show kids doing calculus. Was there any sort of intellectual component to the like any tough questions? Did you have to express yourself a certain way, anything like that? No,

it was very basic. We just need to learn how to dance together and answer questions, how you lie about if you got a lot of money, what do you do with it? You know, they're all lying about it. They want to get their boobs and get their nose done, but they're like, I want to give it to the children's hospital and the dogs and cats.

Fuck the cats. You want new boobs, bitch. Like they were just lying. I look at them and they're like, I'm just give it to the children's hospital. And the dogs are cats. Fuck the cats. You want new boobs, bitch. Like, they were just lying. I look at them. They're like, I'm just kidding. I'm going to get my tits. But they were like, oh, I care about the children. You know, it's just amazing to see how they lie about it. What are they in China, aesthetically, what are they looking for?

Like, you know, I think you could go region to region. Like in Brazil, they want that big butt. You know what I mean? And maybe in Germany, they want a big bosom, for instance. And, you know, in the United States, we want everything all the time. But what is considered sort of coveted physically in China? Is it height? Is it breast size?

Like what would win you that competition? If I was in China, being super white, my skin being translucent vampire, bleached asshole white, and then skinny like a chopstick, flying Vietnamese rice noodle, like skinny and white. In China, we have a saying come

from like a thousand years ago is e by je tian cho e means one factor the factor is being white if your skin's being white it's gonna cover a thousand of your ugliness from other places so if you're white you are ugly motherfucker you are gorgeous if. If your skin is white, one eye is missing, but she's so fair. It doesn't matter. It's just so important. If you are gorgeous, your skin is dark. Bam! How does racism manifest in China?

Makes me curious given that thought. It's so classic in China. It's all about money. China is being polluted by the idea of when China was opened in the 80s, people started making money. Money what car you drive uh where do you live that's the question you ask then you decide if there's a second date you need it because it's so hard to make money it's like instagram like if you don't have many followers you're not gonna get it because whoever got it already got it in china says well there's no chinese dream you can just

go from nowhere, become somebody. It's just who's your father? Who's your dad? Somebody run somebody over. My dad is who and who. You can walk. It's getting to a point that money, money. Wow.

Very interesting. Money speaks. You know, it's interesting when we talk about China. It strikes me that they're really just kind of a society that's sort of built on thoughts and impulses, good and mostly bad, that are just thousands of years old. Yeah. I mean, I mean, are what so what we do in the United States, and I'd be curious in both your thoughts on this. I think we do it to a fault.

I think what we do is we go, what was old and what was old? Well, that would be kidnapping women from the city and dragging them to the to the village and slopping them with the hogs. You know, what would be old? Old would be having a son and throwing the daughter in a dumpster when they were born. You know, what is what is old? Old is I want you to be skinny and white so you can be beautiful. What is old? Old is my want you to be skinny and white so you can be beautiful. What is old? Old is my dad is a powerful man, so I'll never get a DUI.

I'll never get arrested. I'll get to do what I could kill a man in the streets, and I would never go to bed. All these are old, right? This is what society was. For better or worse, this is just society was for better or worse. This is just how we rolled a thousand years ago. Right. Throughout history. Now, what's that? We enslaved people. Yes. What what the United States does is they go, what's the opposite of old?

And that would be drag queen story hour. of old and that would be drag queen story hour we will we will get men dress them as women tuck their cock and balls between their legs and then they'll read dr seuss to five-year-olds that would be the opposite whatever you would have been dragged out in the street and burned for or drawn and quartered for in the past, that'll be our focus. Because in the United States, that's the opposite of old. So family, nuclear family, moms and dads raising, all old shit. That's all old. We want all new.

Now, we've gone too far and we've fucked up our own society. There's no fucking doubt about it. I know exactly what's going. So what was old was racism. Just outright racism. Slavery and all the things we're talking about. What's new is we will call everyone a racist who does anything at any time to any group that is not their own or even if it is their own we'll work race into this that's what's new uh that's not a good place to

be either we we went we went too far but when I think about China I just sort of think of life as humanity was a thousand years ago and with and cell phones, but just the basic rules. Does that make sense to you? Yeah. And maybe the new is that the way the Chinese people being a communist, the way they work is they just give all they have. Like they would take Google and take it and make it become the Chinese Baidu. And they would take something from Germany and make it better

because they would just take it and like they would build a railway. They just build it like they build a great wall because authority is so powerful. You don't perform. You can't get shit. You can't have food. But in America,

people have rights. You know, like you can't do anything. Like in China, write something. You just fucking write. In America, it's like people have rights.

It's good to have rights. Like I don't feel like if pyramid could never be built if it was now, nobody was going to do that. Or a great wall. You know, people just don't do it. I have rights. Right. In China, it's like, no, you don't.

You are going to do this, and that's the code of honor is to deliver something. But it's interesting that you seem to put a little focus there on the lack of innovation, that they take things and perfect them, but they don't innovate new things. Is that accurate? It's not encouraged. Innovation is not encouraged. Saying anything new could cost your life, could cost your job. In America, we always say being innovative is celebrated. Being an artist, be outspoken is a sexy quality. But in Chinese culture,

we have the same thing. It's the is that if you're a bird, you're flying high. That's the barrels are going to aim at you because you are flying high. So nobody will be the bird that's on top. That's why the Koreans are making better movies

because they encourage innovation. Like the Japanese, they are making good stuff because it's encouraged. But in Chinese culture, if you're outspoken, you are challenging the authority. You are the problem. So there are people who have talents, but their talent cannot be realized because innovation is not encouraged. So going back to the beauty pageant, how did that put a target on your back? It was really crazy. I just, because I've always been ugly my whole life, according to people in

China, because my face is too round. My nickname was cage fighter when I was a child because my face is too squared and my skin's too dark. So I just always wanted to be a pretty girl. I saw this beauty pageant that would make me a pretty girl. And then I actually called my mom and she said, yeah, of course you want Miss China because Chinese and America, we have bad relationships and Americans,

they are very smart. They are using this as a propaganda to choose the most ugly girl to be Miss China so they can show America the prettiest girl look like this. They bring shame to us and Chairman Mao I said Chairman Mao what are you talking about she goes yeah that's the whole thing they are bringing shame to us and you are the bullet to the heart and soul of the Chinese people you should be ashamed I'm just like oh my god and so and so how is is Mao still a real presence there? Or has it all sort of been subjugated?

Huge. Huge. His face. Huge. In the center of Tiananmen Square, that is his face. And Xi's father was prosecuted by Mao. And he's doing whatever he can to become as influential as him. And to be, you know, because he can be the as influential as him and to be to, you know, because he can be the president for his life. He changed. He changed the law that

Mao is such a huge presence because the way Mao ran China, the Cultural Revolution, you know, he controlled people's speech. If you worship him again, it makes it simple and easy for you to do what he does and not be judged. So it's a very smart way to do things.

It's another thing that's sort of counterintuitive about America. We constantly talk about free speech and then we denounce a lot of countries that try to control the speech and then we then attempt to control the speech here in this country a new thing though that's a that's new that's that's a that's a very new thing but a but a weird a new thing the thing about your mom is i was trying to think about you know your, your mom versus Western moms culturally. And I do hear this a lot, and I'm not sure how much of it is exaggeration, but my mom was not a good mom, but she would never in a million years say you're bringing shame to this family. You're no good. You know, you're ugly.

She actually would just say all those things through body language or sort of the ultimate, which is, you know, she just go in the room, her room, shut the door and go to bed. Like you would be sort of starved out, but it wouldn't be an overt thing. It's not that moms don't yell at their kids or their daughters, but what I mean is like, you've brought shame to this family. You know, my parents' approach to me doing stand-up was just to go, just go do it, but do it outside of the house, and we're never going to watch you, and we don't care. But they never said, you're not funny, you're bringing shame to this family but when I

talked a lot of women and men of sort of Asian cultures they say their mom were vocal about these things it's a big thing but but a vocal you know aggressive vocally versus a sort of passive aggressive like my mom has plausible deniability because there is no record of her saying you're stupid there's just her thinking you're stupid and never saying anything is that because she's exposed to uh therapy and the mental health because in america the culture like even her parents they will talk about the mental health yeah and the therapy but in chinese culture i would say my generation would be talking about oh, there's a thing called therapy.

So I'm the first people who actually think about therapy. That's why I'm not calling my son stupid because I can't let him become a comedian. That would be bad. I lied to him that you are not stupid, honey. It's okay. But I really want to tell you, you're so dumb, but I try to be like, it's okay. You can do that. It's what

kids do. But in my heart, he a dumb kid i do i do think that therapy teaches them enough to know to not say you're stupid you're ugly but not so much that they could think something different they they just bite their tongue yeah Yeah, I think so. I remember once my mom was reading a book and I was about eight years old and she, from reading the therapy book, said, it's not that I don't like you, it's that I don't like the things that you do. And I said, I am what I I do I still am what I do what do you mean if you don't like the things that I do then you don't like me because that's who I am I don't know how

I had that I had that insight when I was eight but that's what I told her wow that's so brilliant is they are choosing the wording to hurt you less. She's doing gymnastics with words, but she's basically saying, I don't like you. But she's not going to say, I don't like you. Empowers her to say something horrible. Right. Your mom would have just put her finger in my face and said, I don't like you. My mom does the Western version of, I like you.

I don't like everything you do which is I would say we arrived in the exact same place right yes she just knows that she can't say that kind of thing it caused more problem for her to fix in the future but she still didn't have enough therapy and knowledge to understand

to love you for who you are I just imagine your mom reading I'm okay you're okay does she live by that book i i think i should make her read it we should have both our moms read that that'd be hilarious no but you know your mom would go you you make me a you you shame me you shame all chinese people uh yeah that's something in adam's world that that's almost like something he would crave like well then what do i do you're having a feeling and you're telling me. Yeah, I don't I don't know what's worse, just nothing or a constant barrage of criticism.

Was your mom ever supportive? No. How does she get over you being a comedian? Uh, no. How did she get over you being a comedian? She came to see me last night. I was at Ontario with Gaffrey, and she was in the green room, and she asked Gaffrey, why are they laughing? I was on stage.

She's on stage. She's funny. She's like, are you sure? She would go there with a phone and with flash on and doing this. And I stopped. I mom you can't have flash on i thought that's my light she's like oh she's not a good comedian she's distracted and then i just walked to have her chicken she's like oh what's the waste of time all right i want to get more into this we'll take a quick break we'll be right back after this naturally when a break happens, every second counts. Latest innovation from SimpliSafe 24-7 live guard protection.

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Xiao Ying was telling us about Godfrey, who's a very funny stand-up comedian who's been on this show many times, who, Drew, you would like because he knows every theme song from every 70s TV show that's ever been created. There you go. But your mom, and yes, what you're talking about, which is the light, you know, if you were opening for Godfrey, I imagine. Yeah, I feature for him, yes. Or feature, sorry.

I don't have the lingo down, but you go right before Godfrey gets out there, right? Yes, yeah. And you do 20 minutes, 15? I did 25. 25? Oh, that's a long set for a feature. Good for you. Yeah, he's very sweet.

Godfrey is very sweet. He's a sweetheart. You do 25, but you tell the guy, light me at 22. Yeah. I need to know where I'm at. They'll hold a light up in the back of the club so you'll see. Yeah. We got to wrap this up in three minutes.

And your mom was lighting you with her camera. One minute. I was on stage. She's lighting me with a camera. She's not just lighting like this. She goes, she's waving and jumping. Cause she's short.

She's waving her phone around, uh, above, above her head. Jumping up like a fat corgi. She's like... Is she living here now? Yeah, she lives here.

She helped me with the children because I'm divorced with two kids. My mom just basically, she helped the kids. She worked with my nanny. She's a big part of the family. Did you get her to get out of China? I got her...

I got my green card. So I was able, after I become a citizen I was able to get her the visa and get her her green card so it's harder now I think a few years ago when Trump was president they won't give you passports actually as of now government

officials whoever work for the government cannot have their passport in possession is right now now your mom officials, whoever worked for the government, cannot have their passport in possession. Is right now. Now, your mom, while look, I'm not going to make this a competition into who had the worst mom, but I would argue that your mom has some practical application. She's here and she's doing something.

She's looking after the kids. You can throw that one out the window with Chris Carolla as well. There was no practical. And I would argue that as difficult as your mom may be on you verbally, the fact that she's hanging out and helping suggests something, some form of love. I felt, yeah, that's why I felt having a Chinese mom, verbally abusive every single moment, but you can trust her with your children. You go on tour year round and the kids are safe and happy.

It's like having a really, really toxic, cheating girlfriend, but she has a fire pussy. Like, it's so good. When we have sex, you're like, I can die now. And then you're just like, well, she's cheating, but nobody has a fire pussy like it's so good when we have sex you're like i can die now and then you're just like well she's cheating but nobody can replace her it's the same thing it's like it's definitely if i have a choice but i'm addicted because having your children taking care of and having a career still having children it's i don't think anybody can do it it's like having a magical pussy like Like anybody fuck her, they die. They're like, I can die. And I just shoot me. I'll do whatever for you.

So she's cheating on me. She's, you know, like a Jada, like Jada's fucking everybody, but her pussy is so good. I'll be a pussy for her. I feel like having a Chinese mom,

having a cheating girl is the best. Jada Pinkett. I'm guessing. All right. Well, I want to say this again. Maybe I'm, you know, maybe I'm projecting or internalizing, but I don't do a lot of emoting. I'm not a big hugger. I don't ask you how you're doing that often. I'm not that sweet at all, but I will do a lot of things for a lot of people. If you are part of my world, I will take care of you.

I will build you something. You know what I mean? Like I will take care of business on your behalf, but there might not be the attitude that you like, but things will get done. And that's kind of my way of showing you that I care for you. Yes. And there's a lot of people that are all fucking talk and never do anything, which I hate because they're doing it in lieu of doing something or spending money on you or whatever.

Maybe your mom's a little more in my camp. Maybe she's not good with the emotional support, but she does take care of business for you. She does. And she does it all the way. She does it perfectly. And she also thinks my children, they are better than me. I was going to say, or she's so ashamed of you, she's afraid you're going to screw up these kids. And she has to make sure that doesn't happen.

Yes. And she thinks they are geniuses because they can speak English. She was shocked by how good. Do you think Chinese, too? Yes. But in China, speaking English is the big plus because you can speak English. You are the elite of society.

So they can speak English. I'll die for them. Their pronunciation is so good. You can't do it in 30 years. They are only two that can do it. But you brought your mom to the show at the improv. Yeah. Which suggests there's a part of you that wants her to sort of recognize you.

Yeah. And see and hear the audience laugh and applaud and talk to God. You know, the audience applaud while she shits on her mom. Well, I'm saying from your standpoint, you're thinking maybe I can win her over. Maybe she'll turn the corner here. That's what I'm saying, Drew. She's such a Chinese mom that she was trying to take a photo of me,

but it ended up becoming her lighting me jumping up and down with a flash on for like a one minute. It just, she can't help. And then she went back there and then she's like, I'm going to take a break. I'm waiting for the real comedian to come on. So she came out and watched Godfrey and screaming crying laughing for the whole time godfrey did a kung fu movie he did a chinese accent she's like oh my god his chinese is even

better than yours godfrey does a lot of funny voices impersonations as well well so you didn't you did not get your mom to turn the corner I don't know Drew did you I've I've had those moments where every once in a while you think to yourself I'm gonna wake this person up they're gonna see who I am they're gonna celebrate who I'm with you know they're gonna see me in this in this world I'm your mom You know, they're going to see me in this world. From your mom? Like, you know, there was a time I would be dismissive of both my parents for anything all the time. But there was one time when I realized my stepdad was kind of being punished

as well, and he didn't really do anything. You know, and I know he loved cars, and the Toyota toyota grand prix celebrity race was coming up and he was kind of saying what's going on and i said why don't you guys come out to the race come to the race it's in long beach 50 000 people show up it's an amazing event come on out i'm racing and uh and they said okay he said okay I think he said okay and she probably said okay too and then I got a mysterious call like the evening before the race with a very short hey this is John I can't make it tomorrow and sort of hung up the phone like wasn't I'm sick

or I got called into work or it was just I can't make it and then I won the fucking race and then they came over to my house the following day after I won the race and I told them I won the race and they were sort of like okay my mom gave these you know anyone want any more cheese and like walked into the house that was the last we ever discussed it but I remember thinking that was my fault for trying to include them yeah into something I got burned you know what I mean I mean I was I was 45 years old so I thought all right at this point you know surely couldn't do it which is weird right but I did have that feeling oh no I'm, I could do this. She could do, she could come see this. I'm busy because I'm watching the Long Beach Rays on TV at home.

Yeah. Oh, from 2001 when you weren't in it. They're playing a rerun. Yeah, it's weird. But Drew, did you ever get sucked into that with your mom where you're like, I could, she could see me on TV or kind of win her over. No, it's a very different thing to me. It was such an empty set.

I knew there was nothing in it for me. There was nothing in it for me. Isn't that weird? I, I did feel the same way. It's just, I think my stepdad pushed me over the edge because I was like, he wasn't a part of this. Why is he being punished?

You know why I'm realizing the why I had a negative feeling about that is whenever there was that kind of acknowledgement, it would get co-opted. Oh, right. It completely co-opted. And so, like, it wasn't my accomplishments. It was hers. Oh, right. It completely co-opted. And so, like, it wasn't my accomplishments. It was hers. Oh, interesting. Oh, you are an extension of her. Yeah.

Well, except when I dared to be autonomous. Then fuck you. Oh, you are smart. You know. Use that on your kids. It feels great. So have we learned our lesson is the question are you ever going to bring your mom to another stand-up show i think i'm just like this child having this

alcoholic dad just like please dad take me to swim and he tried to take me to swim but he left me at the swim pool without sunscreen and he left and i i was there until 9 p.m and i called my mom she's sloppy she's like why you lie about it your dad never took you out from school you'll skip school the teacher is like we didn't know he took you and he's sleeping at the couch at home he's like i didn't take you to the swimming pool so like everybody think i'm lying and i just hope one day he's not drunk he'll take me again i just we can be so smart with other people, but when it comes to parents, we're just always the little kid hoping maybe. A little bit specific there. So you will

because hope springs eternal. Yeah. You will take your mom to another stand-up show in the hopes that this time maybe she'll wake up. I think there's that. She'll have an awakening and understand who you are. I really hope. I'll keep trying. I really hope I would keep trying.

I just going to keep a try. I don't know. I think you do what me said. You do what me and Drew did. You just throw in the towel. Yeah. Let her take care of your kids. And yeah, but that.

Yeah. Like I said, you never I'm just never getting anything out of it. I just had to be whatever. My dad was a great grandfather. And so I appreciated that so it it goes a long way when they help with the kids a long way yeah uh jiao ying is the name summers is the last name and she's got a podcast out tiger milf with jiao ying and um summers i should say once once again and i want to spell that for you guys uh one more time so you can check her out on instagram tiktok as well at j-i-a-o-y-i-n-g summers she's super funny and um always a delight to speak to thank you so much for joining us

thank you so much for having me wonderful meeting you dr jo for having me. Wonderful meeting you, Dr. Drew. I've been a big fan of both of you. Well, thanks. So until next time, this is Adam for Jiao Ying and Dr. Drew. Oh, and you can go to amcrow.com for all my live shows. And Drew, you got? Amcrow.com, TV, whatever. And until next time, I'm Amcrow for Dr.. Drew, I'm Jowian Summers saying mahalo.

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