The Adam and Dr. Drew Show - #1972 Give Me, Get Me, Take Me

Episode Date: February 7, 2025

Dr. Drew kicks off the show with some exciting personal news—he’s officially a grandfather! He and Adam then dive into a discussion on why Americans are having fewer children and debate the timing of breakups: is it better to end a relationship before or after Valentine’s Day? Don’t miss this mix of heartwarming updates and practical advice!

Recording live at Corolla One Studios with Adam Corolla and board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist Dr. Drew Pinsky. You're listening to the Adam and Dr. Drew Show. Yeah, get it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, got it on, That's X Specials. Board fortified. Board fortified, eight essential vitamins. So, you know I have a grandchild now. We haven't really talked about it much on this show, but it's a girl. And there's a couple of interesting phenomenon that come with a grandchild is that, you know when you're the, oh, there's me with the baby.

And when you're a parent, there's sort of no, I mean, you're in it all the time, right? But as a grandparent, you kind of come and go. And it's interesting to me how hard it is to tear yourself away from a child once you're sort of with them a bit. It was interesting and very difficult for the wife to do so.

I think the female connecting thing, the attachment mechanism is more powerful. And although I was surprised how aware of it I was, I was like, wow, it's really, it's interesting how much I don't wanna leave. Yeah. And so we're running down to- I think that's a good impulse.

Yeah, no, it's good. I'm not judging it. It's just interesting how much I don't want to leave. Yeah. I think that's a good impulse. Yeah, no, it's good. I'm not judging it. It's just interesting how quickly it develops. And I'm running down there every week. Now we're going to be down seeing the baby. Yeah. And the great news for us is the other grandparents are very involved.

So the actual work burden is taken up by them, which we are eternally grateful for. You know, it's funny, I never react when people go girl or boy because it's always like, it's gonna be one or the other. And then it's like, you got a sister, I got a sister, I got a son, I got a daughter, you know what I mean? Like it's a weird thing when people try to create

a sort of novelty almost around it. We're gonna have a gender reveal party and something. It's like, it's just a boy or a girl. And then also- How dare you? You can't have an equally enthusiastic reaction to each. You know what I mean? Like you go like, it's a girl,

and people go, oh my God, that's amazing. You know, and then you go. That is just the gender aside at birth. You go, it's a boy, and they go, oh good, that's awesome. You know what I mean? It's like, it's gonna be one or the other. It can't be equal, can it? Or it's equal, then who cares?

Or it's the same, or something? I think it's people's, it's a thing, I think it bothers me more than it bothers most people. Yeah. Weird false enthusiasm, like big, you know, like you go, yeah, they, yeah, I got a grand kid. Oh, is it a boy or a girl? It's a girl.

Oh my God, that's awesome. Yeah. You know, it's like, it's gonna be one or the other. But you know what they, but they don't have to be good by the way that could turn out to be bad they will often fill with a story yeah like oh that'll be so fun he'll have little league of blood they're now he's eight years old yeah yeah yeah yeah she'll be the head cheerleader yeah oh it'd be so great she's

so cool little girls are so wonderful she'll never she'll get aggressive piercings and learn to despise you because you stand for oppression, which is more likely to happen than any other cheerleader scenario. I like hate. Yes, you vote for hate. You voted for hate and intolerance.

Well, that's good, but speaking of gen, yes. Before we do gender, I wanna do a quick thing on babies, which is, do you have some data on babies? Well, there's a trending topic right now that Americans are having fewer kids if they have them at all. Do you have specific data? Does the data get into the data? Like, how bad is it? We just know it's bad. And it's, you know, Elon Musk has been ringing this bell for a while, that population collapse, it's an exponential spiral in the opposite direction. It happens fast.

And people need to be aware of it. I though noticed in Florida, lots of kids. And so I thought to myself, oh, well, when you leave in a shitty world with no job and no future and encumbrances and everybody's unhappy, of course you don't have kids. But in a state where everyone's kind of happy and doing shit and walking out on sandbars with their dogs, people are having, there are a lot of kids around, matter of fact. Well, listen, if there's the existential threat of climate change, why would you have kids? You're just endangering them.

Well, I mean, Drew, if you believed, I mean, and this is sort of my, you know, this is kind of my Biden Trump thing. Like if you believed, you're listening? I'm listening. Listen to me. If Biden believed that Trump was Hitlerian and gonna end democracy, he wouldn't have left him a note in his desk when he took over the Oval Office. He would have left a bomb in the Oval Office. Because that's what you would do if Hitler, it's called Valkyrie, and they tried to do it.

Do you know what I mean? If you do believe someone is that, then you're that. If you do believe, Drew, that we have, until about 2031 or whatever the dates they- I thought it was 2019. Whatever their dates are that they give before we're gone, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Well, would you have a kid if you thought that kid wasn't going to see his 11th birthday? No. Right. So, I mean, maybe they're being consistent. But I would argue

that the psychology that's weighing on them is not even that explicit. They just know things. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But climate change is a big one for them. It just know things. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But climate change is a big one for them. It's one of the many. Right. All right. So in 2024, let's talk about 20, you know, 2018, non-parents under 50 who said they were not too likely to have children's like 16%. Non-parents under 50 who said they were not likely at all, about 20%. That was in 2018. 21, not likely at all. 23, not too likely. 21. So it increased a couple percentages from 18 to 21. And gosh, what happened between 18 and 21? Oh, pandemic. Nice. Imagine what it felt like to be 24. And can I plan my kids? I can't go out of my parents' basement

without killing my family. 18 to 34-year-olds in 2024, without kids who said they don't want an A is now 18%. And 18 to 34 without kids who aren't sure is around 30%. I think that 30% is gonna shift. That's my prediction. What do you think? there's a Okay, I think things are gonna get brighter

Let me explain the movement around Narcissism is what's doing this and and and the wane of and in getting away from Religion is what's what's causing this. Kids are basically, you have to live for someone other than yourself. And you have to do a bunch of stuff for someone who's not you.

Now, a lot of it's financial, and then a lot of it is just calories burnt doing stuff that's not for you. Yep. Okay so Religion is sort of you know, the the cornerstone of religion is a lot of Others other than you you know bigger greater good, you know society humanity heaven whatever That did delay It's in gratification Yeah, but that's not I mean the point is a delight, it's gratification.

Yeah, but that's not, I mean, the point is that that's not exactly what I'm talking about. You don't indulge yourself, what you're saying. Yeah, it's not about you. It's not about you want your neighbor's oxen, but you can't have it. That's right. And it's bad to even covet it.

That's right. So, to even say you want, you know, okay, okay, it's not about you, that's what religion is. We're living in a society where it's all about you. And if you don't believe me, you gotta check Madison Avenue, because it's, you know, it's all about just do it. You know, like it's you, it's you, you, you, you.

So, if that's the mindset, then where do the kids fit in? You know, where does the up at 3 a.m. with the feedings and the diapers and the saving for private school and the picking up, you know, dropping off at practice and stuff, where does all that come in? Now...

You could have a transgender, that's about you. You could be proud of that. I come from parents who didn't do much of... Well, they did certain, some things, but they figured out a way to have kids and not do anything for people. But it makes for miserable kids and resentful kids and then sort of not a great relationship.

And it was funny, it's funny, I haven't brought this up in a while, but my dad would always say, and jokingly, but when people say things jokingly, they mean them. Everything I joke about is 1000% mean all the time. But unless, my dad would always jokingly say about my sister, give me, get me, take me. Give me, get me, take me.

Give me this, take me here, get me that. You know what I mean? But she was really saying like a meal, or a ride to school, or some, it was basic shit. It was not like I wanna a ride to school. It was basic shit. It was not like I wanna go to space camp. It was like base. But my dad interpreted it all as all you want is stuff. All you want me to do is to do stuff for you.

Which is true. That's what kids want. They want stuff. And maybe they want a mini bike or maybe they wanna go to space camp or maybe they want to go to space camp, or maybe they'd like to go to summer camp, or they would like to go to Farrell's and have ice cream. You know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah, I want a quarter, because the ice cream truck is coming down the street. But in my dad's world, it was like, give me, give me. It's all you want is stuff. And evidently, you didn't give out any of that stuff or my sister wouldn't have run away. She ran away because there was no stuff showing up, you know what I mean? So she just left to go get her own stuff and I went left got my own stuff later on but my dad's interpretation was you nine-year-olds, you just want stuff from me.

You know, rides to friends or to go to the movies or to pay for something. And he voiced it. Like he was like, what's this about? Because like in his world, it was sort of like, what about my stuff? Which is a problem when you have parents. It's really sort of a why are you bothering me? Sort of, like, what about my stuff? Which is a problem when you have parents. It's sort of like, why are you bothering me?

Sort of, like, ugh. Yeah, it's all you're doing is asking for stuff. And it's like, yeah, that's what people do when they're not independent because they're relying on you for like shelter and food and protection. Give me, get me, take me, that was it? Give me, get me, take me. Yes, it? Give me, get me, take me. Yes, she wanted you to take her to her friend's house

because she does not own an automobile or a driver's license because she's 12. She wants you to get her some food. Yes, that's... That was a funny thing. He trotted it out like, am I right or am I right? I don't know, I should ask her about give me, get me, take me, which was his idea of a punchline.

Yeah, maybe that would be a good way to bridge it. But I would argue that it was very telling as to what his mindset, I think innocently, you know, if I was to be charitable, that was his mindset. Why are you coming at me for stuff all the time? Do you think that he, he grew up poor, poor, right? Yeah. Do you think there was so much depravity there

that he just, he couldn't even ask for anything back in those days? He had an Italian mom who made spaghetti meatballs every night, so he kinda got that part, you know, where you sat down at the table and there was food and stuff, you know? Weird. Yeah, that is weird.

I don't know, but understand that when you become a parent there's gonna be people. Need stuff from you. All the time. Yeah. And it's not really gonna be people. Need stuff from you. All the time. And it's not really gonna be a two way street. No. At some point, presumably you could ask them to take the garbage out or something at some point,

but I don't even know if I'd count on that in today's modern era. You know what I'm saying? Just, it would even be just, it becomes a blood, you start to know like Jesus Christ what a one way street this is. It's like at some point, you know I said to my son like, he wanna watch football over here or whatever,

I said, can you just Uber over here? And he's like, yeah I'll Uber over. And I was like, ugh. Even that, just the fact that you're doing something is something, you know what I mean? Forget about helping raise the livestock on the farm, on the ranch, you know what I mean? Like any of that, driving a tractor or something.

That's literally just moving yourself from one point to another. Or being able to get into my car when I give you the keys and 50 bucks and just go on a sandwich run, you know, feels like, oh, quite a breakthrough. Thank you. Thank you for that. That's right. And you wanted to say something about gender? I interrupted you. Oh, well, we have, we have a break to take, but then the aforementioned promised DNC spokesperson who needed the gender.

We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. Shopify, when you see a company like Gymshark and they have a great product and brilliant marketing, you often forget about the business, behind the business that makes selling possible. Nobody does selling better than Shopify. Home of the number one checkout on the planet. If you're into growing your

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yeah bet online hey it's Adam Corolla from the Adam Corolla show the biggest betting weekend of the year is finally here, which means more updated odds and props for Super Sunday. BetOnline is the world's most trusted betting platform and your number one source for online betting. We have hundreds of prop bets, MVP odds and exclusive in-game live betting. BetOnline is also your ultimate game day companion with the largest selection of odds on everything from the NBA, college basketball, NHL, MMA.

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they made that shit up 10 minutes ago, no one knows what it is. And you don't know what it is and it doesn't exist. So fuck off. And Z and Zay, or Z and Zay, I guess, X-E, and them and Zim and hers and Z-X-E-Y, they don't know what the, they have no idea what they're talking about.

And they're basically, but they're also, these are the same people that are talking about, you know, nicotine is brain poison or something. They don't know what the fuck they're talking about. They're just making shit up. They don't know anything. But they're also talking about hate. Yeah, yeah.

Hate, a lot of hate. The way everyone else has to hate. And as opposed to people looking at this going, oh my God. All right, so rules specify gender. So they're trying to, he's announcing at the RNC that they have to re-vote. Oh, sorry, the DNC. I'm sorry. Go ahead. Rules specify that when we have a gender non-binary candidate or officer, the non-binary individual is counted as neither male nor female,

and the remaining six offices must be gender balanced. With the results of the previous four elections our elected officers are currently two male and two female. In order to be gender balanced we must we must elect one male. You can't figure it out. Let's just go ahead and say this. Stay close to the pause button when we run these tapes. It shouldn't be caught off guard because we're gonna do pause all the time. Dawson used to do a great move.

Or Dawson would hit play and then he would swing his stool around and turn his back to me all the time. And I would just go, Dawson, it's a 40 second, just for the 40 seconds, be prepared to pause. And he'd swing around and stop it again. Then he'd swing back around. Could have been a little antisocial, I don't know. Two females and two males feels pretty balanced to me,

gender wise, Drew, but not if there's 700 genders. Then it's not. Well, how do you do balance then if there's Aziz's? Do each of those need to be, and do they need to be balanced by something else? Unclear, but we'll let the man continue. I like when they get tripped up in their own declarations. Because the reason they get tripped up

is because they don't make sense. But so go ahead. Yeah. Gender balance we must. We must elect one male, one female and one person of any gender. So again, this is what we have to do for this vice chair race. We have to let one male, one female, and one person of any gender. All right, pause. But any gender wouldn't balance it. But that- Any gender other than male and female.

Well, this is where it kicks in because like when the LA Times is reporting about the guy who raped the eight-year-old in the Denny's bathroom, they're like, the eight-year-old in the Denny's bathroom. They're like, the eight-year-old victim went into the bathroom and then she came in behind him and then she pulled out her penis and then she raped him, or sorry, they raped him and I'm like, they? She? What, two?

No, no, one dude. But you get confused immediately because, well, because you have a brain and you've been on the planet for 10 minutes, I don't know what he, pronouns have a purpose. What does he mean? Yeah, does, he's not articulating himself clearly,

but we'll run it back a couple seconds and play it. I just, I wanna know what he's thinking about there. Byron, you should probably stay in there during these segments. Vice Chair, race. We have to elect one male, one female, and one person of any gender. To ensure our process accounts for male, female, and non-binary candidates, we conferred with our RBC co-chair, our LGBT caucus co-chair, and others to ensure that the process is inclusive and meets the gender balance requirements in our rules. To do this,

our process will be slightly different than the one outlined to you earlier this week, but I hope you will see that in practice it is simple and transparent. The order of balloting is designed to ensure equal access to the ballot, regardless of gender identity. As we must elect a candidate of any gender as well as one male and one female vice chair, we will first ask members to elect a candidate of any gender on the first ballot. Any candidate, male, female, and non-binary, can be elected on that ballot. After a candidate is elected on the first ballot, we'll have one officer of the three, so then we will know which position is filled of the one male, one female, and one vice chair of any gender.

Oh my God. Our second ballot would also be for a candidate of any gender. This sounds horrible. Our third ballot will be the third position that is remaining based on the two results. Don't we want... Either a male candidate if a candidate that is not male has not been elected, or a female candidate if a female has not been elected. Why don't we just, you guys just vote somebody good. Of any binary anything. Of any anything. Do they not know this is what the other side makes fun of constantly? Like America thinks it's funny and ridiculous? It's not that they make fun of it as ridiculous, they're tired of it.

And they blame it for things. So when things don't work they go, oh of course, they went through that process to find somebody as opposed to just who could do this the best. Yes. Yeah. Well, imagine if you're looking for a defensive coordinator and you're using this process or an airline pilot or an air traffic controller. You are. There you are. Where you are. Right. So, go ahead.

We're coming in on Valentine's Day. We've got a story about that. Oh, we do. Yes, we do. So, first I just want to hear you guys weigh in on this before I tell you what the article says. Do you think that you should, if you're planning on breaking up, do it before or after Valentine's Day?

I feel like Daphne really wants an answer to this. She wants our opinion. I think if you're thinking about breaking up, you should do it. As soon as possible? I do. I do. Yes. I would think that would be a good... Well, you don't do it on Valentine's Day. No, you don't do it on Valentine's Day. And after Valentine's Day, you could build a little resentment. You were planning this all along. Why did you make it feel sweet blah, blah, blah. So I'm leaning a little bit on the before side.

I'm going before. Yeah. And certainly if you're fixing to break up, just do it. Yeah. I mean, it all, it kind of depends what stage you're at in life too, because Valentine's Day means something different to different people. There are women that just aren't as into it as others.

There are others that are very into it. There's some sort of 19-year-old version of it, and then there's a married 31 years version of it. You know, it may be, it's the same on everyone's calendar, but it's different to different stages and different couples and different people. The male partner cannot win, whatever stage you're at. It's never good enough, it's always a failure,

in my opinion. Yeah. It's hard to get it right. Yeah, but I know, I guess you just, and also I don't know when it came sort of, I mean this is not a new thought, but Valentine's Day became the male's date to fuck up. Yes, exactly.

When did that, when did this day of romance become the guy's, and anniversaries are that way too. Like these are shared dates and shared experiences. When did the onus become on the guys to screw up? And by the way, women would do a far better job of planning that day, that date, that whatever that is, they would be much better at it, which is by the way, why they aren't in charge of it,

because what they want is the effort on on the male side and so much so much is symbolic for women which I think is a a problem also it doesn't it does the I am I am an insanely pragmatic person. So any woman I've ever with is always disappointed because they're not wired pragmatically and I am wired pragmatically. So, and also with the sense of, I would be totally happy if they would get me a cordless impact driver for Valentine's Day

because I would use it. But if you got a frying pan, you hit over the head with it. Right, but if you got me a spa, you know, daddy's day at the spa, I would like it, but I'd rather you take the $189 and spend it on the tool that I will use far beyond Valentine's Day, right? 100%, yeah. Yes, all right, sorry. that I will use far beyond Valentine's Day, right? 100%. Yeah.

Yes. All right. Sorry. Daphne, do you have any other pieces of information? Well, this is our last article, but basically what the therapists are saying for Valentine's Day is if you already want to break up, do it before Valentine's Day. But if you're on the fence, wait until after Valentine's Day to do it. Hmm. I mean, then it's not even... Then until after Valentine's Day to do it.

I mean, then why is Valentine's Day figure into it? Because if you're on the fence, wait a couple of weeks after Valentine's Day. So it really is another endorsement for before Valentine's Day. You really want to get right down to it. If you're fixing a breakup, break up. Yeah, I would say. And I don't know. I don't know if your wife puts pressure on you for Valentine's Day or...

I thought, you made me think, I may try to experiment this year. What's the... See if she can deliver Valentine's Day instead of putting it all on me. Well, what they want is not a meal or a bouquet. They want effort. And so the problem with that is it's inherently on you, which is to say, as I've said many times, if somebody, you know, if you're a guy

and you drive a UPS truck and you buy your sweetheart a $5,000 piece of jewelry for Valentine's Day, then she would really appreciate that because 5,000. Deferred, yeah. No. Oh, sorry. You don't know where I'm going here, do you? No.

If you drive a UPS truck for a living. Right. And you buy your sweetheart a UPS truck for a living, right, and you buy your sweetheart a $5,000 piece of jewelry, right, she will appreciate that. Yes. Now, go ahead. Because that requires tremendous effort when you're doing that job. That's what I said. That's not what you said. You said effort. Yeah. But yes, now finish the story. Now she would appreciate that because that's a tremendous effort if you're driving the UPS truck. Well, although these days. Well, you keep saying effort, but it's a lot of money. Yeah. For that bracket. It represents many hours of effort of work. Right. Now what's the rest of the story? The rest of the story is if Mr. Corolla buys a expensive watch for someone very expensive

She may not like it so much because it wasn't enough of an effort. She just went out and bought it You keep saying effort, but it was kind of weird that you keep saying effort But well you if Jeff Bezos buys his girlfriend a five thousand dollar piece of of jewelry, then what? She throws it back at him. Right. Because it doesn't represent, to keep consistent with the theme that we have brought up, which is of the effort. Doesn't care.

Women want to see an effort. Yeah, it's two minutes worth of work for him. That's right. Versus, you know, three weeks worth of overtime. Right. Or whatever, right? So that's how it works. versus three weeks worth of overtime or whatever. So that's how it works. So then what do women want? Well, you could say jewelry,

but then why did Lauren Sanchez throw the $5,000 tennis bracelet back at Jeff Bezos if women love jewelry? Yeah. You all used to say it had to be painful. Yeah, so you have to do stuff You don't want to do yeah, if you love jewelry and you make manufacture jewelry, then sorry No jewelry for Valentine's Day

They they also wanted to be thoughtful. Yes. That's the other thing. You know, you were thinking of me Yeah, you look here's what I said many times Why do women, like you, why is the most romantic thing you can do is plan a picnic for your woman? Why? I, you know, again, you had to plan, you had to think about it, and it required effort again to use that.

Right, you going to the steakhouse and whipping out your credit card is fine, but that's not you going to Trader Joe's and asking about cheese varieties, right? Now, picnic is you sit on the ground and you fight off ants and you eat stuff that's not as good as the steakhouse, but you get much more credit for planning the picnic

than you do for the steakhouse. And if you're rich, you get almost no steakhouse credit. If you're, you know, a couple of people that are struggling and you take them out to a $300, you know, steakhouse experience, then that's appreciated. If you're rich, then no. So that's how women were. Didn't hurt.

Doesn't hurt. It didn't hurt. For me, I just like the steakhouse, regardless of who's paying for the steakhouse. Right, I wanna have a dinner at a steakhouse. I would appreciate you buying it as opposed to a poor person buying it. And I even understand it like I mean I was

on the road What was I gonna say Drew no steak out oh I was on the road yeah and Rudy's my opening act is real sweet sweetheart of a guy good dude good hang, but he doesn't make the kind of money I make at all. And we were doing two shows in Boca, and I said, hey, listen, I'll order the food because the place is gonna close

by the time I come off stage. We gotta have the food delivered. We can't go out to dinner, it's too late. I have to work. But I said, I said, you'll order the food, then when you come off stage, you go pick it up while I'm going out for an hour on stage,

and then when I get off stage, we can have to sign autographs or something we can eat. I said, okay. I took a hundred, I called the restaurants, it was $74. I took a hundred dollar bill out of the merch bag or whatever and I just set the hundred dollar bill on top of the pad that had the order on it. And I just left it in the green room.

And then I went up on stage after he did his opening set. And then when I got back off a stage, I saw the hundred dollar bill still there. And I said, Rudy, and he went, I paid for it. And I went, no, no, no, no, no, no. Because, and then he said, you pay for everything all the time, let me pay. And I, but it did, for me it was like,

yeah, but I know how much money you make and I know how much money I make. And I really, it didn't sit with me well, but there was that element of, this is a, this is more impactful for him than it is for me. And so that's a human way to go. And in a weird way, just the gesture is sufficient.

You know what I mean? Oh, for him. Yeah, the transaction didn't have to be made. Just the fact that he was willing to do that and did it. Yeah, there's also a part of me that feels a minute of shame and that he thinks, he thinks I sent him to go pick up food with no money without paying for it first. You know what I mean? I don't like that he's at the counter

and the guy's going 74, 75 and he's going, oh, I gotta get out my credit card. You know what I mean? mean like I don't like that feeling. No, I'm with you. All right Torrance the end that's coming up February 15th fun club Austin coming up San Luis Obispo Monterey nappage. Just go down for like I'm for all the live shows. What do you got? Dr. Com. It's all there. So till next time Adam Kroll for Dr. Jersan Mahalo. live, unedited as we record it, participate in the show via live chat. That'll be coming up very soon. You also get an ad free version of the Adam Kurl and Dr. Drew show.

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