The Adam and Dr. Drew Show - Classic #570: Bachelor Party

Episode Date: January 15, 2026

May 1, 2017Adam and Dr. Drew talk about bachelor parties and help a caller whose is worried about him not expressing emotions.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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This one is about bachelor parties from May of 2017. We talk about bachelor parties and help a caller who's worried about not being able to express emotions. It's another throwback episode number 570 from May 2017. Recorded live at Corolla 1 Studios with Adam Carolla and board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist Dr. Drew Pinsky. You're listening to The Adam and Dr. Drew Shoehuis. show. Yeah, get it on. Got to get on. No choice to get on. Man, man, they get on. Welcome to Adam and Dr. Dr. Drusky's show, everybody. Right on right on. Thank you. Thanks for tuning. Thanks for telling a friend. Big Bad Drew is back. Big Bad Drew.

Everyone loved Big Bad Drew. I didn't remember we did that. And now all of a sudden I saw social media taken off with that. I'm like, huh? Oh, I guess we did do that. Yeah, man. Having fun. Oh, there it is. Hmm. Have a morning at the mind you could see him arrive. He stood six foot six and weighed two 45 kind of broad at the shoulder and narrowed the hip and everybody knew you didn't give no lip to big Drew. Big Drew, big Drew, big bad Drew.

That's right. All right. When the time comes, that will be the new calling card, shall we say. Should I make some point that is appropriately or significant, right? Or if I say something scary, then we have a new theme song. Yes. Good times. All right.

What are you thinking about? So, I'm thinking about a lot of stuff. Oh, by the way, Maria Bamford's my guest on Dr. Drew podcast. I do chat on over there. I'm a huge fan of her. She's a very interesting person with a lot of interesting thoughts about psychopathology, her own, and others. And so please head on over to that. My thoughts with Drew are always about trying to kind of corral reality.

Creality. Ooh. I find myself almost obsessed with just listening to talk radio or watching the news and seeing everybody just get up there with their sort of rock solid talking points and then have whoever's conducting the interview attempt to, well, essentially what you do is when you talk to somebody and you disagree, you then attempt to. paint a scenario that is either going to make them seem disingenuous or seem like they possibly have an agenda. Right. Or they possibly go, which will never happen in 2017, but oh, I never thought of it that way. That's an interesting point. I know I do that, but then I'll want to sort of probe their logic a little bit and see if it falls apart.

It doesn't matter anymore. Like I was I suppose you're right I was watching Well it's like I think What I'm saying is As we discussed it before David Wilde comes into my podcast

He's outraged By He's outraged by He's outraged by Bill O'Reilly It's still unclear whether Bill Ever touched anybody or not But he's outraged by his activities And I'm not condoning that

But surely Then you must have equal outrage About David Letterman And what he was doing with his interns None at all I find that interest interesting. Yeah.

And if you didn't have an agenda, I feel like you'd either be not outraged at all or equally outraged because if your only agenda was women's rights or women's rights, then you'd have some. You should have some feeling about it. Right. So I look, I get it. Do you have a political bent and that's it? But when having civil discussion, unfortunately, you have been sort of checkmated a little bit, or at least to some degree.

I'm not saying game over. I'm just saying, you don't have to pack up and go home, but what I'm saying is when somebody says, when Tucker Carlson is talking to a guy and the guy represents the Bay Area, you know, political action committee, and he's explaining that their judge struck down this sanctuary city thing and the lack of fundings

and the funds going from the federal government and all that kind of stuff. And he says, so this is a victory. And by the way, this is perfectly within our rights and it's perfectly fine. And then Tucker Carlson says, all right, well, President Obama said, you know, four years ago, we need to have bathrooms that are, that indicate folks are transgendered. And, you know, Mississippi, if you don't go along with that, you're not, you're not getting any money.

Any federal money. Right. You were perfectly fine with that notion. Right. Well, this is the exact same thing. So let's be consistent. Would you be all right if Mississippi said, we're not going to do this? And by the way, we're just going to get a judge.

And that judge is going to say, we do get the money. Would you be asking? The guy literally would never answer. I'm just amazed at it. He would just never answer. Well, that's what I'm amazed at. When I do, we're doing radio talk, I'm often in re-attorneys and things. and their answer, my question is always no,

and then they launch into something that's not an answer to my question. I literally find myself saying, I asked X, you answered Y, why has nothing to do with X. Now, I'll ask the question again. And they'll often do it a couple times. I'll go, thank you.

I understand this, your opinion. Answer my question. That you're a lawyer, you know what logic is, you know what a question is, you know what I'm asking, answer. And if I remember, right, the last time was most out of line, I was talking to somebody about protecting felons.

And I said, Everyone agrees we don't want to protect felons from the deportation. Yeah, well, we're protecting average citizens who can't go to the call of the pediatrician. I go, yeah, yeah, I understand. But are you for protecting the felons also? Well, that's, I'm here to protect. Right. Should we protect the felons also or not?

Yes or no. You really have to ask multiple times. It is, it's, it's, they're not, I'm, I'll just assume they're lying because they're, smart enough to hear the question. They're listening and they're preloaded and they have their little points, like you're saying. This call might get a sense to me of the other stuff I want to talk about. No, you know what a fun one is? If you ever talk to any of the abortion rights people, and I'm all for abortion, I don't

care about abortion, I think I've been pretty clear about that. But if you say to the person, all right, you want to keep it legal, you want to this, you want to do that, plan, parenthood, this, and the other, fine. personally, when do you think life begins? Yeah, I know. I believe all women have the right to choose. I don't know. I get it.

But what's your thoughts? What are your thoughts? Do you have thoughts? What would you think? I guess if somebody nailed me down, I'd have to come up with some sort of number or some sort of time. You could go 2,000 times and they'll never answer the question. Let me bridge over to the corallity, the coralling reality you'd like to do. And before the mic's heared up, you know,

talking about, we were talking about Gary taking an extendo bachelor party and how we would not know how to ask our bosses for things like that during the week. Right? Well, to be a little clear about it, not not know how to ask our bosses. I've had one modality my entire life, which is when is this thing? I do it all day every day. There's a car race coming up. When is it?

What day is it? And then to pause and then I go, oh, I can't. I got to work that day. and then moving on. Or. As opposed to, oh, I got to talk to it. Or a version.

See, there's versions. I did this my whole life and I still do it my whole life, which is what day is it? It's Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Okay. Friday's out. I got to work Friday. Sunday, Saturday, Sunday, I think I can get there. I might be, what's going on Friday night?

Because if I can catch a flight Friday night after work, then I can get there. Now, the about. the only shaving on that would be is I might say maybe I can get out an hour early on Friday and get over to the airport or whatever it is. But even that would be

not a discussion I would have. So I wouldn't not dream of bringing this up with the boss. I would not discuss it because I wouldn't dream of, it wouldn't come up to come up. Well, and then now that we're sort of on our own, we're you know, I couldn't get away from my practice you know, because no one else

could, you know, I didn't have any replace what I was doing. I was sort of where the buck stopped just so the way you are in this business. And so you can't, there's no one to talk to about that. You just can't go. Yeah, I get, it's a new world order and people work weekends and whatever and the dates and the times and we're not bound to the nine to five, whatever anymore. I'm simply saying this, bachelor parties don't need to be four days.

They used to be one day. And when Maxa Patta was saying to me, how they get to be four days, I said to him, that's when this started. They got four days because it could be four days. Right. No one would ever, you'd be insane to say to your boss, I need Thursday off, Friday off, or the bachelor party, whatever, whatever day off. It would never come up. It's not, hold on.

Come on now. It's not doable, right? No. It wouldn't be a conversation. I wouldn't occur to me. That's the thing. Okay. But can I say this?

Yeah. It wouldn't occur to you X amount of years ago, getting back to our transgendered bathroom, to have a conversation about the rights of. transgendered people or gay people getting married or whatever's going on in our society. So you're saying it's a different time? I don't, I don't say, there's nothing wrong with Gary. Gary happens to be 20 years younger than me. That's what's wrong with Gary. Okay.

It's not, he stands out amongst. You're not putting it as a value judgment on him. I got it. No, it's like putting a value judgment and talking to my kids about gay couples and whatever. It's just, it's a sign of the times. Now, hold on. it will hold you back. Right.

But I'm not making a value judgment. But that's what you said. He goes, that's why they will fail. You said something like that. No, they won't. I said to my son the other day.

You said this to me, though, today. You said something like, that's why they won't progress or something. Well, if you have a motor, you will progress. If the whole deal is chelax

and enjoy the concert, then you won't. And your son's, you said to your son. I said, look, super simple. It's super simple. I don't care about college.

I don't care about anything else. you are going to go out in the world with a bunch of super soft pussies. All you have to be is a little bit hard and have a little bit of a motor and you'll conquer. You'll conquer everything. So in other words, our entire country has become like a giant radio station. Mm-hmm. Explain. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.

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Pluto TV, stream now, pay never. You're welcome. All right. So, where were we? So it's a new world order, Drew. No, it's me. That's all. Here they are. Best dress shirts. Ooh, proper cloth.com. Okay. And it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with anybody because it's a new world order. You see what I'm saying? I do. And what I said was, what I was thinking was, huh, now you've been complaining about all this antisocial, oppositional defiance stuff and your people that you're attracted to or have in your life.

And it occurs to me that a lot of what we're talking about here is the relationship with authority and the relationship with becoming an authority. Both are things that people with oppositional defiance have real trouble with. They don't really want to become that authority person because they hate it. They hate it. And so automatically they're going to be thinking, what can I do to get around this authority? Because authority sucks. That's, you know, antisocial, opposition defiance, as opposed to, hey, that's just a do with a job. How can I?

Let me just talk to him and figure out how we can get both of our needs met. No, it's an authority bad. And then I have a bigger sort of thing. I don't know if I mentioned to you last week, but I think it's somewhat of a result of all of our conversations, which I'm beginning to think. Did I talk to you about this about sort of an archetype that we've been following in this country? I think I mentioned it. Well, maybe off the air. I don't know if it's on the air.

It's just not a very, it's not yet a really developed notion. I need to study it and think about it more of it. I kind of feel like we were in this country a hero archetype into the Second World War, certainly. We sort of thought of ourselves in a country, sort of heroic. archetype. We bail out other people and countries when things are going, when evil is raining down upon them. If you were to look upon the prevailing psychological archetype that this country had at the time, we take in the international, we take in the poor, we take in the refugees, we take, we go save people, it's sort of a heroic archetype. But you say, somewhere about 1965,

we decided, oh, well, that sucks. We're the anti-hero. We're the not that guy. We're going to make, I remember the student body president was some screw, everything was a screwball. Everything was an, some sort of antisocial sociopath was elevated. Rock stars, those are our heroes. Right. Criminals, those are our heroes. Right. Godfather.

And so, and we, I think we are still living in that weird archetype of rejecting everything of a authoritative sort of authoritarian, certainly. And we're in the kind of the tail end of that. The tail, sort of burning out on it. Let me be clear here, because I think I can fix all of this in your brain. Okay. All right. You ready?

Yeah. I'm going to make all the dots connect. You listening, Max Patton? Before you do, do you, do you hear me? Does it make sense what I'm saying? Is it, am I on to something? You're on? Look, I've said many times, you know, when you say like, you know, it's my thing about

these horrible Saturday morning cartoons, they entertain seven-year-olds. and or I always say retarded adults because when they say, oh, he's 44, but he has a mentality of a seven-year-old, then you go, okay, that's severe retardation. All right. I get it. Kids used to be kids, and kids were sort of meant to be seen and not heard. They didn't really get a vote. They literally didn't get a vote until you became an adult in this country.

And we didn't listen to you. We were adults. You're the kids. You were the ones who didn't know anything. and we're going to smoke in the car with you in the backseat. We're going to listen to Les Brown as a band of renown, not your new pop music, the Archies or whatever it is. We don't listen to that.

I'm the adult. I own this car. It's my car. It's my radio station. And when you're older, you get your own car. Listen to what you want. Right now, you listen to what I went. All right.

So those were kids. What decade we talk about there? 50, 60, 70s? Historically, it's always been you're the kid. I'm the adult. And it's some... But it's meant different things. I would argue that that was particularly that way in the 50s, the 40s.

Yeah. No. And the 1850s are probably more than that than the 1950s. Because I think then it was like, hey, man, I'm worried about you need to survive. We're all trying to survive here, that kind of thing. Well, I mean, it was like, I don't know. They're on a form and they told the kid to get up at six and go milk something. Because if you don't, we're not going to, you know.

Yeah. But you're the kid. I'm an adult. I tell you what to do or what not to do. And to be fair, again, I'm really trying to refine this in the 50s, and 70s, the adult declaring all that was sort of a prick, sort of an asshole. Yeah. And that may have been. It wasn't a prick or an asshole.

It was just that was our relationship. No, no. And you're the child. It was sort of like madmen. We were too inflated from the victories of the Second World War or something. We felt too good about ourselves. Well, maybe there was an element of that. But either way, there was an adult.

I get it. There was a child. But again, I'm trying to really drill it down because I know where you're going to. Let me fucking finish. Maybe we could get to this. They had adults. They had children. Really?

Children. And they acted like children. We act like adults. And at some point, we decided to be obsessed with youth. And that could have been, you know, hey, what's the prime demo? 18 to 34. 18 to 30. Young, young, young.

Hey, you talk to people all the time. And you'll go, oh, the guy's got 5 million viewers, but he's only got 800,000 in the demo. And you go, what about the demo? They go, all they care about the demo. It's all they care about it. 41-year-old dudes don't have money to buy Audi? They just care about the demo. They just care about the demo.

But remember, the demo then was starting to buy records and all these crazy new technologies and things. But we started focusing on the demo. And then I started noticing it some years ago when it's like sitting in a sports bar in Detroit. Why are we listening to Rihanna? When did all this come in? Like, when did we need?

Then being old became a put-down. You know, we'd call somebody old. It's like calling them fat or dumb or something. Or maybe the old. worse or worse. Then it was members. You would probably establish it, man. Yeah.

No, I'm saying now, then the point is, is we turned it to youth and we started turning everything to youth, every commercial to youth, all the music to youth. Everything was about accommodating the youth and wanting to know what the fresh hot 17, 18, 19-year-old pop star wanted. And then we started curtailing society toward the youth. and so when you talk to what just read your thing you then no no no I'm looking down and flapping around no no it's actually because I'm deep in thought

I'm actually thinking about so finish up please all right well I know you get up I have I have a thing when I'm thinking I'm all right all right so it was all about youth well youth they're stupid they this thing it's like oh I have so much to learn for my kids are these blowhard you should see these blowhard actresses and actors They get up there and it's like, I learned what courage was by looking into the eyes of my 18-month-old daughter. And it's like, you didn't learn shit about courage. I don't learn anything for my kids.

I teach them shit. I don't learn lessons from them. When did the kid, the kid, the kid, thanking the kids. You know, used to go up, by the way, you'd get an Oscar. You'd thank God and your agent and then your wife. But there's nothing to talking to your kids and it's time to go to bed. Kid, kid, kid, kid, kid. Okay.

What are kids? kids are selfish little shits that need to be broken of a thousand bad habits in order to become an adult. What's Ray? Ray's just a guy who's basically a kid. When you get into adulthood and you take all the things you wanted, not wanted, but your tendencies from being a kid, I told you I played football with Ray when we were 12 and he'd go, all right, you guys kick off to start the first half. and then you guys kick off to start second half. And I go, that's that how it works.

You go, well, that's how I want it. And then you go, no, and you go, I'm not playing. That's the way we're going to. And you'd argue back and forth. And you realize, okay, but when you turn 30, you're not supposed to be having the same discussion because that stuff's supposed to be sort of worked out of you. And I've told you, I think the lack of a rigorous educational system makes it less likely that the majority will have that worked out of them.

You know what I mean? You don't leave it just up to their family of origin. Well, men used to become men regardless of the educational system. But the point is, yeah, what's going on on the campuses today? I honestly, I don't want my kids to go to college. I really don't want them to go to college when I see what's going on on college camps. So what happened on college campuses? College campuses is a whole bunch of adults that are there to basically tutor kids for four years.

But they've decided to let the kids take over. Right. So you're there at Berkeley. It's like the kids don't, they don't want this guy to speak. Like, I guess he's not speaking. Other kids are upset. Yeah. the school systems used to be, these are the adults, these are the kids.

Adults tell the kids what to do and then they move on. When did we decide to listen to 18-year-olds about? I never signed off on it. So I asked, I saw this kind of thing happening probably about 15, 20 years ago, and I asked a patient of mine who was a psychoanalyst and a bit of a historian. I said, have there been periods of history where this kind of thing happens, this sort of youth-centered thing? I'd sort of recognize it quite some time ago. And she said, I don't know if this is true or not.

Maybe one of our listeners can straighten us out. But that there is this sort of an anthropological phenomenon after a great victory that a cult of the young male develops. So that's kind of interesting, right? Yeah. And every 50-year-old guy out there is just wearing some new religion jeans and a tight, stupid t-shirt with a dragon on it. And he's dripping just for men that he's just combed into his hair. Like the guy, it's our fault for trying to be them. I know.

Oh, I'm down with Drake. I love Drake. What do you mean? I love the pop-up rap. Sorry, music. You got to tell something. Our generation created this whole fucking thing. I'm going to Coachella.

We led the way into this anti-establishment, anti-authority. We were there. We were 18, 19, 20. Now, not me either, but I remember relating to it. I remember when phony was the worst thing you would say about somebody? Yeah. And phony just meant somebody with sort of social, sort of racist, social sort of decorum. The rally is this 19-year-old dudes don't know any.

I know that. We shouldn't be asking them for what their opinions are on anything. If you want to hear more about this, go to Audible. That's right. Audible.com. You can download books on any subject, including anthropology and history and all the great things that we've been talking about here. Lewis Black's got a new book. The rant is due.

The rant is due. See the turn turn. New original comic series from Audible channels. Yeah. We can hear the latest episode free right now at audible.com slash Lewis Black. It is audible.com. Lewis Black, Lewis Black, one word. The show is written by the fans.

He rants about everything, politics, relationship. You anything about ranting? Anything that's driving you? I would, but I'm in a class section lost it against the producers right now. Grinding your gears. You can go ahead and submit your rant to Lewis Black. And if you don't know him, of course, how could you not know, Louis Black? He's regular on a daily show.

He's the voice of anger in Inside Out and over a million fans on social media. So I urge you to listen to the rant is due. at audible.com slash Lewis Black and while you're there download some books, educate yourself, learn about some of the stuff we're talking about here. Yeah, man. Audubon.com.

There they go. So anyway, we shouldn't listen to 19-year-olds, but we decided that 19-year-olds had all the answers. And we decided that because we decided that old was bad and young was good. And thus, since there are no qualifications for being 19 other than chronologically being 19, we have a bunch of dopes,

and we're turning to them to sort of set the trends for society. So we asked the young dope 19-year-old, hey, is it okay if 47-year-old Anne Coulter comes to your campus and speaks? And they go, hell no. We go, okay, heard you. Sorry. We're going back to our offices now.

We're in the past, it'd be like, hey, young dope, get the fuck out of the way. The lady. Young dope. The lady who has some opinions wants to come share them with anyone who might want to be in the audience. And by the way, if you'd like to go in the audience and raise your hand, be respectful, have a question, have a dialogue, have a debate, we're fine with that. Start chanting or throwing things. Then we're going to get you in a choke lock and drag out.

There you go. Look, even the cops are like, we can't really get involved with the 19-year-olds who are burning shit because we don't want to get into trouble. Yeah. Okay. Well, guess what that? Guess what 19-year-olds don't have boundaries. And you, not creating boundaries physically or psychologically means they're just going to keep spreading.

and their demands will continue. Expand. Well, not that they expand, but they get crazier and crazier. Yeah. Like, it used to be, you know, 20, you know, in the year 2000, like, hey, David Duke wants to come give out brochures about the Klan. And it's like, we don't like that guy. I guess we does it during the daylight hours. We're going to go down there and protest, but I guess he can go do it.

I guess that's right. Now it's like, hey, someone wants to fly the American flag at the next. young students meeting. Like, oh, no, no, that's hurt. That's hurt flag. That's hurt flag. We don't want that.

We'll have other flags, but not that flag. Yeah. Those, so, they just, by the way, Drew, I'm just thinking that they're- Let me explain to you. I'm explaining to you. Go ahead.

It doesn't really have an agenda other than spread out. That's its only agenda. It's the same way I feel about government. Government doesn't want to house the homeless and it doesn't want to clean up traffic or cleanup. It's just, all it wants to do is spread out. It just wants more.

Just wants to get bigger. And the way it gets bigger is by saying, hey, I'm going to handle this homeless problem. I'm going to handle this. I'm going to handle this. We can just start a department of homeless people. And then we'll just, we'll spread that out. Well, then we've got to get some money for some housing. And we're going to add the taxes a little bit.

All it wants to do is grow. And all 19-year-olds want to do is spread out. So it's like, they don't know who Ann Colter is or what she said or read any of her books. And they don't know. They don't care. They just want to spread out. All this problem with like the flag everywhere, didn't people really have a problem with the flag?

Or they think they're just looking to spread out? It sends laser beams out of it and harms people. But listen, it occurs to me, though, that be careful what you wish for. I mean, this stuff is getting so bizarre. There's going to be such a backlash. I mean, you know what I mean? You can really start to feel it now.

It's like, oh, it's going so far. Any reasonable person is just going to come swinging back. Well, what the professors and, and a lot of people on the left aren't understanding is it is up to you to police your own. You can't have Bill O'Reilly and Rush Limbaugh try to police this group. This group has to be,

every group has to sort of, look, it's why they take, when they're doing a controversial interview with a black person, they send the black, 60 minutes, sends the black guy. You know what I mean? Like, send in the black cop. Get the gangs.

You know, it's like you almost, you think about the black community. It's like, hey, they have black leaders, black, they need to police. The guy at the red hair can't come in and start shouting out a bunch of proclamations at the angry black young mob, right? This is kind of that. Berkeley or whomever or whatever, professors at Berkeley, you're going to have to start policing this group of people who pay you a ton of dough to attend your school. We're not going to be able to do it from over here. Remember, the sort of... tacit message is that these kids are acting out properly.

It's really our message they're carrying. And so we're kind of glad to have them carrying the torch. I heard a professor from a college interviewed the other night where he was just basically explaining, he wrote some op-ed piece basically saying that the colleges do have the right to vet these people. and he's basically saying, listen, I'm 100% for pure speech, 100% of the time,

100% of the places. Except when I decide not. Some of these people, you know what I mean, they don't need to come to the campus. They're not, well, you've got to earn your way onto that campus.

You got to, so it's like, you're 100% for free speech, 100% of the time. It's just, we'll have to pass it through your prism so you can decide

whether this person's worthy or not. Does that sound like, what does that sound a little? Drew, When the hypocrisy gene goes, it all goes. It goes fast. The dignity hypocrisy gene is really what keeps you in line all the time. Yeah.

I can't sit there. Because you should be embarrassed to be hypocritical. I can't sit. I can't stand in front of you, Nick, hat with a bucket of chicken under my arm and just eating it. Tucked around my gut slopping over my pants and go, looks like you put on a couple pounds. You let you let yourself go. Oh, let me have a hit off that you. Yeah.

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All right, quick question. Talk to Nick up there, Nick, Chicago. Hey, how you doing? Good, man. I've been a lot of big fan long time. Thank you. All right. I guess I'll start.

Due to my job, I'm a firefighter, and before that, I was in the military, I can kind of have to separate my emotions from everything else, more or less. Otherwise, there's really no way to cope with what you do and see. And that's kind of been leaking into my personal life with my wife. She said, I don't show any emotion. And I guess it's hard for me to care when she says she has to do an extra 10 minutes of paperwork at work. When I just, I was just working a dead guy, you know, giving them CPR for the last 30 minutes. Yeah.

Because how can I work on that? No, you just have to fake it and you have to realize what they're asking for. Yeah, I can remember this too when I would be seeing 50 patients in a day that were all extremely difficult and challenging and complex. And then you'd get home and people want to complain to you about just something. In comparison, you almost couldn't even hear what they were talking about. And you have to own that that's you. You know what I mean? You've chosen the career.

It's your experience. it's not fair to compare it against somebody else who didn't choose that, wouldn't want that, couldn't handle that, you handle it, feel good about it, but don't do comparing. It's not fair. You know what I mean? Well, it is fair, but since when did anyone care about fair? I mean, it's not fruitful. It's not fruitful. Well, no, it isn't fair in the sense that, look, you can't, because then someone from Cambodia can go, what do you complain about doing CPR?

or at least you're alive. You know, I'm missing a limb, you know, whatever it is. I mean, you could just keep going and going and going with it. What I'm saying is, is everyone experiences this. I experience it, you experience it, anyone's married, experience it, because you have a crazy schedule, and then you come home and your wife goes, oh, God, the guy was going to do my blowout was late, screwed up my whole day, and you're like, bite your tongue, bite your tongue here.

But you have to try to be empathic. That person is having an experience, and her experience is you need to honor it. You don't have their experience. Well, no, what you need to do is not break it down to its elements and examine it. Right. You had an experience of a hard day trying to save this guy, got an accident on his motorcycle. She experienced a hard day because her boss raised his voice. That's right.

That's empathy. Right. And that's her version of a hard day. Right. And you had your version of a hard day. That's exactly. And it's not going to serve you at all. to start comparing and stuff.

Well, all it's going to do is piss you off and piss her off and you'll never get anywhere. So resentment's on both sides. Pretend like you care. Now, there's a liability here that he just sort of pushed past, which is how disconnected he is from his emotions generally. And there's a difference between sort of your professional position and how you operate and how you're able to compartmentalize when you're professionally operating versus. how when you shut that down a little bit or turn it off, that mechanism and get back in and in touch with your feelings again. And if she's complaining that you don't have feelings out at home, one of two things. You might be compartmentalized because of post-tomatic stress, and you need to really look at that,

and you may just still be uptight from what you experienced during the day. Or number two, you may generally be somebody that's compartmentalized and can't access feeling states. And that's even a potentially more serious thing. both warrants a little bit of looksie because that will catch up with you with time. Okay. Now, speaking of time, life lock, you don't have any more time. It's 2017. People are going to go after your identity.

I've always said thieves, they're lazy. We always think of them as bad. And I think of them as bad, but I think of them as lazy first and then bad. They just don't want to have the alarm go off at 6 a.m. and have to show up somewhere and give the government X amount of their money and a percentage of their money and this and the other. They'd rather not do it. It's weird, but look, people that punch people are bad, but people that steal, they're just lazy and they've got to make a living. This is how they do it.

They steal your identity. And my point is proved because identity theft is America's fastest growing crime, not stealing a car stereo. It's too much work. It's a calorie burner. Your point is proved. They use a life lock and you use life lock. and you save your identity. I have it.

My kids have it. Wife has it. No one can prevent all identity theft or money or all transactions and all business, but LifeLock is the best protection available and membership starts at just $9.99 a month. It's LifeLock. Drew. Go to LifeLock.com or call 800 LifeLock.

Use promo code Adam. That is Adam, A, D-A-M for 10% off your Lifelock Ultimate. Plus membership, 1-800 LifeLock. Call 1-800 LifeLock. All right. Thank very much. for tuning in. Thanks for telling a friend. Thanks for all that stuff. You can go to Adamcroll.com, find out anything. You want to watch my show tonight, 1130 on Spike. Me and

Joel McHale, the nicest guy in the world. Have a lot of fun. It's Adam Croll and Friends Build Stuff Live. You can check out... Oh, yeah, use the code Hooters at Corolla drinks. I saw her on Instagram with a bunch of Hooters checks. Yeah. Yeah, last week she used. judge a bikini contest. It's so funny. Yeah.

All right. She'd let you do that. No problem. No safe space is me and Dennis Prager, available on Amazon, iTunes, all that stuff. Drewski. Please go to Dr.Rood podcast. Maria Bamford. Check it out now.

Also go to doctor.com. A whole family of podcasts, we are getting some very cool and interesting guests and interesting conversation. Me and Spaz, you don't want to miss weekly infusion or this life. So until next time, I'm Carl for Dr. Drew saying. Mahalo. Pluto TV has thousands of free. movies and TV shows. What?

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