The Adam and Dr. Drew Show - The Word Annoying, French Stewart and Quiet Narcissism (The Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics)

Episode Date: August 10, 2024

Adam breaks down the word "Annoying" and it's over use. French Stewart stopped by to talk to the fellas and "Quiet Narcissism" is something that Adam is tired of!

Welcome back for another edition of the Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics. I am your host, Big Brother Jake. Let's get it started. First up is episode 1726 that aired on May 28th, 2023. Adam gives relationship advice when you're in an argument with your woman and he hates the word annoying Take a listen There are people who I have great

Disdain or lack of respect for mm-hmm and I Had a lack of respect for my mom. I have a lack of respect for Joe Biden. I have a lack of respect for like Adam Schiff and Kamala Harris, but I would never say I'm annoyed by them. There's character. Many people I think have deep character issues, but I do not, I wish they were annoying

versus deeply, deep issues with character. You know what I'm saying? Yes, I know what you're saying. And I've never. That's concerning, not annoying. I've never, and I guess as close as guys get to calling people annoying is maybe obnoxious, but that's a woman thing too.

Well obnoxious. They do obnoxious and annoying. Yeah, obnoxious for a male means there's usually aggression in there too. They do obnoxious and annoying. Yeah. Obnoxious for a male means there's usually aggression in there too. Yeah. To women, obnoxious is a annoying person who's drunk. That's basically how you move from annoying to obnoxious. Yes. And it all is a relative of disgust. And we know there's just a biological thing where women are much more tuned into disgusting things,

disgusting smells, disgusting images. It harkens back to protecting infants from infectious material or dangerous material. They have a very powerful reactant to disgust. And so annoying becomes something they pull away from. Again, disgust is a highly motivating feeling. It moves you away from something. And annoying starts to drift into, I'm moving away, disgusting. Yeah. And it's interesting. And I think a lot of it is sort of tribal, you know,

in the sense that I'll meet a lot of women or talk to a lot of women, they'll be like, oh, I love Michelle Obama, or I love Oprah, and it's like, what do you love about them? You know, what do you mean? And it's sort of like they're one of us, or something, or they care, or whatever that thing is. But it's nothing, like if you asked me

what I like about Mark Geragas or Ben Shapiro, wouldn't be like, hey, he's one of us. You know what I mean? It'd be like, these guys are deep thinkers and they have lots of interesting insights. And ideas. And ideas, not like, he looks like me. You know what I mean? He likes stuff too.

Like dirt thing. Or he taught in either of them are into the mechanics. He talks about the children of the world and how someone needs to do something for the children of the world. Adam need to place at the table. Yeah. And it's like, yeah, that's nothing talk. Why do you like that? Well, they're talking about it You know what I mean? But what are they doing? And there's something exciting about but as I was saying to Drew so women are annoyed and they find people annoying and also

Let me posit this through When women use the word them being annoyed by somebody, I think there's a method to their semi-retarded madness. Women do not like to be assailed on stuff or confronted on stuff. Every argument I've ever had with a woman that involved some date or some time or something at some point you start reaching for your phone and go let me just show you the email you sent me three days and they go oh fuck you and they storm out the room they don't fact they're not fact-based they're not interested in the nuts in the bowl. It's being impinged upon is annoying

But let me just say this if You said to me, you know this person if you said This person or that person is X Y or Z then I would say well, you know, give me some examples. Oh, they're wrong about X, Y, or Z. Well, what did they say about it? And be specific. And let's see if we can clear this up. Or you express to me what it is. If you say you're annoyed by somebody, there is no argument. There's no counterbalance. There's no argument there's no counterbalance there's no there's no well now it's time for me to prevent present the facts and in my case you're

just annoyed this is when you're annoyed by somebody you're just like an Indian having a bad feeling you know what I mean is you like walk into the valley yes or or a dog who knows that the the new boyfriend is bad is a bad dude you know it's like well how do you argue against annoyed no you can't argue against annoyed and that's why i think women use it a lot because they'll say you know your friend he annoys me it's very you know what i mean and you go art Art's a great dude. And he's a good dad and he's smart and he tells the funny stories. He's annoying. Now, what do you do with annoying?

You can't argue against it, which is what they like because they don't want to deal in sort of facts and data. It pulls them away from that person and it's close-ended. It just ends the relationship. And so if you're on a date and the girl goes, why'd you end the date? He was annoying. Right. Nothing, nothing specific ever.

Like I didn't like how he parted his hair or anything. Just annoying. Well, you could say, right, because if they said his breath was bad, then the guy could say I brushed my teeth and floss before I walked out of the apartment. Or not like that, but thank you. I thank you for telling me. I can correct that. We ordered the garlic-based whatever, maybe that was something.

But annoying, it just covers all. So. But think about this. You had pointed out years ago how women, when they are not annoyed by someone and are attracted to them, they'll find reasons to orbit in their proximity, including touching, like the hand drag. Remember that whole thing? And back when we were that age when that meant something.

But that women will actually touch even, while if they're annoyed, they go the other direction. And so I think that annoying, that there's a, I don't know a better word than value, put on being at ease. They like funny because it makes me at ease. So annoying is I'm not at ease around this person so he's annoying. Well, women, you know, if you really think about giving away 50 pounds of muscle to the creatures that want to have sex with you, you would need to be relaxed. You know what I mean? The number, your number one state would want to be being relaxed. Well, and it turns out that estrogen is very much tied into that function and something

that's called receptivity. The muscles literally have to relax. Do you, like, as a guy who's walking around at 200 pounds, if you're on the airport shuttle and some guy sits next to you and he's 250 pounds, there's a part of you that's like, who is this guy? Like, does he? And, you know, if you look at his phone and he's listening to the best of ABBA or something like that, you go, okay, I'll relax. You know what I mean? But if you're wearing like a Raiders jersey or something, you're like, I better kind of keep, there's a physical component there.

So there's a phenomenon there that nobody talks about because it all goes under the heading of toxic masculinity, but that women don't appreciate is that men are always on alert for violence. We're always assessing other men, always. And when we were young, it typically turned to violence. What do you think Chris and Ray were doing to you? Violence of the highest order.

But I was walking with a woman and we walked across a bridge and we saw a shallow but large and broad pond filled with koi fish, large koi fish. I don't even know the difference between carp and koi fish. Oh, I don't either. And they may be the same thing. Want to kind of look it up? Maybe a carp is a bigger koi? Let's see.

These are large koi fish. It could have been carp. Okay. Carp versus koi. I'm just going to look it up. And then they were swimming and it was very serene and it was lovely and it was tranquil and we stood on the bridge and looked down on the koi slash carp swimming around and Then noticed ducks The ducks were not in the water. The ducks were standing on the Embankment on the edge is sort of a formed cement hard edge and up about a foot from the water line,

and they stood there. Koi are types of carp. Yes, exactly. And the ducks were standing out of the water on the edge. So the ducks are not in the water, there's koi flying around, and they're just standing over there on the ledge. Well, the kois aren't flying around.

They're swimming as they would do. Yeah, they're just sort of milling about. And then she said, I bet the ducks aren't in the water because they're annoyed by the fish. But there's that pulling away thing again. The fish annoy them? Yep. She saw the pull away and she assumed annoyance, disgust, pull away.

Yeah, now I don't know a ton about ducks, but they appear to be sunning themselves or drying themselves off or I don't know what they were doing, but I Don't think they were out of the water because the fish were annoying them Now the fish could have been doing something to them, but annoying The thing that's comical is no ducks get annoying. No animal gets annoyed It's not something that applies to the animal does she know we're talking about this? I don't know Oh, King state snakes don't get annoyed You know what? I mean gators. No reptiles get annoyed. Yes, foul doesn't get annoyed. They get scared It's scared or they get aggressive aggressive, but they don't they'll get annoyed. Yeah, and I thought that was so

Interesting. He said you almost called me right then That'll get annoyed. Yeah. And I thought that was so interesting. You said you almost called me right then. I almost wanted to call you so badly. Welcome back to the Adam and Dr. Drew Show classics. Up next we have episode 1738 that aired on June 27th, 2023 titled Never Never Never Never. Front of the show, French Stewart phoned in to talk with the fellas. Check it out.

All right. Something for you guys to look for that made me laugh. Biden the other week was given a gun control speech. It's fine, usual stuff. There's this new thing though, it's gun violence. It's not violence, it's the gun, the person with the gun, which is essentially like blaming the car for drunk drivers. That's it's not the car You're not supposed to drive it this way, right? I don't know. Is there a difference? They're both things that could kill other people if not used correctly. So you We don't blame the car for drunk driving deaths, we blame the driver, why not blame the guy holding the gun?

But this is just gun violence. It's not violence, it's gun violence. So with that in mind, we should A, get rid of the guns and B, we should get rid of cars Well, if they're gonna be involved with drunk driving, yeah Same logic says exact same logic. Yeah, right. Yep, right. So the gun violence is caused because they're guns and The homeless problem is caused because there's no home Yeah, so and one problem is caused because there is something and the other thing is caused because there isn't something

There's no homes, but there's guns. Yeah So there's violence because there are guns and there's people's rotting in the street because they don't have homes. Yes Interesting. It's the same brain. I mean it's the same logic. Same logic. Which is utterly flawed and could never lead to a decrease in gun violence or homeless. And yet if you really believe that everything about the human being, everything, was caused by the environment, well, the the kind of you gotta go that way You'd kind of be persuaded by that wouldn't you but he gave this speech

I don't know. I mean Ben can find it but this funny thing where he like Reeled off at the end when he was talking about all the Shootings, you know, I mean, but it's always schools. It's never South Side of Chicago. It's just school shootings, you know, he he He peeled them off. He peeled off like five of them like Vivaldi and Whatever town and whatever he just he just rattled him off and then He explained that he'll never forget any of those things that he you know thinks about it every night before he goes to bed and that kind of stuff, but I was like

Clearly all those names were in a prompter. Of course. There's no possible way Biden could have got through. The whole thing. Well, the whole thing. But I'm saying you couldn't rattle off five mass school shootings from the last eight years if it wasn't loaded up in a prompter. But the next thing that was in the prompter was he'll never forget which thought was kind of ironic because They wouldn't put it in the prompter. He'll never forget except he wouldn't have any recollection at all. Yeah, we're not in the prompter

Yeah, they'll find it made me laugh. I just wrote it down ironically. Hey, so French stewards back French stewards back French French Stewart's back. French. French Stewart. Can you hear us? How are you? I can. Can you hear me? Yeah. So you moved to Atlanta. What happened? Oh, I did. I did 40 years in LA and that was good for me. And I just during the pandemic, I figured out that I could, I could live anywhere. And so I went cheaper where there's rain and I just during the pandemic I figured out that I could I could live anywhere and so I went cheaper where there's rain and I like it I love it here. Oh yeah. Where are you in Atlanta? Are you outside Atlanta? Yeah I'm just inside like I'm well I mean I'm not going to give you an address to a

crazy person with a gun that you love so much and come to my home. He loves guns. How'd you know, French? Yeah. I got you. But we should reset this. So he called last show, Adam did a bunch of thumping to make sure, verify this is in fact French and we did such, we verified and it certainly sounds like French.

And I was saying that I was thinking about him lately, weirdly, and I wonder what happened to him. Everything okay? Are you good? Oh, I'm great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm, you know, I did like a three-show spin on a new show on ABC, Will Trent. I always kind of, you know, I kind of plop along. But, you know, next year I'm turning 60. So'm kind of like you know I'm winding down and enjoying my life and my kid and just doing you know just a little bit less and kind of picking my shots I'm gonna do a movie next month I did a movie last week and so I just kind of take it as it comes I'm glad because I so talented I totally yeah so what happened oh I appreciate that I appreciate that thank you it's always been a pleasure to talk to both of you

I really I loved the old days over at K rock where you know We could like answer calls for teenagers and then you know you go out there and like Rodney is standing there with his imperceptible radio voice And you're just like oh, it's Rodney on the rock. What's going on? it's Kevin and Bean it was really they were lovely days and you you you guys did some I think you guys did some heavy lifting for some teenagers with problems really yeah it was a very interesting time yeah in space and radio and city and and you know obviously none of us appreciated it like we should have during the time. But looking back on it, it was a really interesting time. I mean, I interviewed

Frazier Smith the other day. Oh, Frazier, yeah. And I'm like, I forgot he started on K-Rock. Oh, very early, yeah. He was very early. Very early. And with... Like 76 to like 80. Like it's crazy. Yeah, when it was below a church and things across the street from where it is now, yeah,

where it was for a minute. Yeah, but there wasn't like one place that you would go to that... Like I would go to the Ice House in Pasadena and Frasier Smith. He's like hosting the Ice House. And then you go to some other, like the improv, there's Frasier Smith. He's like in a shark skin suit. But, you know, like, yeah, there's Frasier Smith. He's like in a shark skin suit. You know? But like, you know, like, yeah, that was lovely.

It was like him and, oh gosh, who else was there? I mean, Kevin and Bean, clearly. But this is the thing that people didn't appreciate, can't appreciate now is radio was a very powerful medium in this, you know, 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s. I mean, it's how you defined yourself was what radio station you listen to and that kind of thing.

I remember going into like, do Kevin and Bane and Jimmy Kimmel was bringing me coffee. Yeah, that's right. Like that seems insane. He would do a sports update and then he would come, he would give me coffee. Like that should ever happen again. Well, you know, one of the keys to Jimmy's success, and I run into it a lot, there's a lot of people that are like, that's not my job. You know what I mean? I had people quit here because I told them

to clean their office, and they're like, that's not my job. You know what I mean? And it's like, Jimmy never looked at anything as not his job. When he was done doing the sports then he would run down and get the guests a coffee if a guest wanted a coffee and he could have went I am the sports guy I don't get coffee but he looked at everything is potentially being his job there's nothing beneath it. That makes perfect sense to me.

It's like when we were kids they used to... I think you and I are roughly the same age. But I think that when we were kids they actually like taught citizenship. And so you would have a class on citizenship and how to be a good citizen. And sometimes it wasn't about, yeah, it was about like, you know, keeping your front porch clean so that other people didn't have to look at your nonsense. And if you took care of your space, then, you know, everybody's space was a little bit better. It's called the Golden Rule. Nobody knows what it is anymore.

And also the Golden Rule and the tragedy of the commons. Those are the two things. What's the tragedy of the commons? It's essentially where you have a common, just what French is referring to, where you have common space and somebody just takes advantage of it because they can't. That's where we're at.

French, good catching up with you and I will have you on my program whenever you like. Absolutely. I just saw you guys on and my heart warmed because I just remembered you know chatting with you in the old days and chatting with you a little more recently, but I love you dearly and have a fantastic day. We'll be right back with more of the Adam and dr. Drew show classics Last up for today. We have episode 1612 titled The Quiet Narcissism which aired on August

18th, 2022. Adam and Drew talk about the phenomenon of quiet narcissism and how it flies under the radar. Here we go. Here's the problem with society as it is in humanity and the state as it is. People go, okay, Fauci said that. And then you got Jay Bhattacharya and you got Alex and Baronson and Dr. Victory and all that stuff.

And you go, oh, they're saying the opposite. You know, they're saying the opposite, you know, they're saying they're saying the opposite. So now you go, oh, well, CNN says the laptop is a fake, and then Tucker Carlson says it's real. So we're tied or they're just saying that, you know, because they said this. Well, by the way, that's how the ladies from the view work. But that's not how Alex Berenson works. But Fauci and Rochelle Walensky and the CDC are getting a lot wrong. Yeah. And Alex Berenson is saying the opposite, but he happens to be right. So everyone just

goes, oh he says that and he says that. And it's like, yeah, but one of them is more accurate than the other. But that's what I'm trying to fucking tell everyone's like He says the laptop doesn't exist and he says the laptop does exist even so they're just saying the opposite of what? Yeah, they are except for it exists. It's projection fucking retards, but it's projection again But isn't that one of them presenting manifestations of Trump derangement? Did you do the opposite? Yes. That's Trump derangement again. Yes. So it's a projection.

I have Trump derangement, therefore I'm assuming you do, and you're doing the opposite just the way I do the opposite. Right. It's projection. Fucking projection. You go, Trump wants to beef up the border. Well, then take down that fence. And it's like, okay, that is the opposite, but how do you think this is going to work?

It doesn't matter. That's the weird thing. So tell me about narcissism. So, to me, that feels like the narcissistic thing you were talking about. Everybody who has real Trump derangement is, I guarantee, is off the... Well, projection is a narcissistic thing. It's narcissistic. So there's the projection.

It's narcissistic. I... Here's what I've, Why did he trigger that? Here's what I've, here's what I've, here's what I understand very clearly. You've seen it in your life a million times. Two narcissists can't hang out in the same workplace. No. You can have zero narcissists or you can have one narcissist and one person that's flexible. My daughter is very driven, hard-headed, moving forward. My son is a lot more flexible. They're able to sort of cohabitate together because one is flexible and one is driven. Put two hard-driving

people in the same place and there's there's headbutting Consic cannot can't be done How many times have you heard somebody you like work with or deal with where they go? I can't fucking deal with that guy. He's such a whatever. It's like yeah, you can't deal with them because you're not flexible and you're a Narcissist I I mean I used to say it all the time. I wouldn't say narcissists. I'd say look you can I used to say it all the time. I wouldn't say narcissist. I'd say look you can Two nice people can share an office an asshole and a nice person can share an office Two assholes can't fucking share an office and both of them think it's the other one Yeah, and that but I just sit back and I've I've seen a thousand versions of this

But why does that trigger the the opposite thing? You gotta do the opposite of that person? It's one thing to go I can't stand that guy. He drives me crazy But to then insist on the opposite at all because your narcissism very weird the narcissism It's to counter attuners action. So the narcissist looks at everything is being looks at everything as being pointed to, delivered, and directed toward them. So everything's about them, you know what I mean? And so that's the first trait is it's about them. Now you can have my mom and my dad sort of quiet narcissism, which is everything is about them, but it's not really about them being grandiose, it's about them not driving you somewhere right or cooking you a meeting impinge upon some yeah

Just I don't do anything for anybody. I just do me. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yes, but Then there's a more active quiet Sounds like a bad radio station. Now more Kenny G. It's a quiet narcissist. QN. It's such a great term though. It's so true. It's so descriptive of what, particularly your mom. You could argue that my mom and my dad were the ultimate narcissists.

You know what I mean? Yeah, well passive aggression is what that's saved for. Severe passive aggressiveness. But people, see, I think people's relationship with narcissism is screwed up like people think I'll give you an example if you put Mark Garagos in a room and you put my dad in a room and you had observers 100% of people would think Mark Geragos was the narcissist in this equation because he's big. And he's telling people, meet me here, get me that, do that, meet me there, do this,

do that, you know what I mean? And with the occasional big laugh and a pat on his own back, right? He is not the narcissist in this equation. My dad is the narcissist. He's the guy who's never done anything for anybody. Mark does tons of stuff for other people all the time. So that's the problem. We don't, we don't, I know it's not as it pertains to what you're saying. It's not the problem. But what I'm saying is is we don't fully understand and recognize narcissism. So my dad is much more impacted by Trump than Garagas. Now Garagas you think, oh, that guy's going to go on a diatribe. But no, he doesn't have Trump derangement syndrome. My dad has it. My mom has it. And when they have it, they

immediately jump to, well that guy's a psychopath, Trump. And my next thing is, and I really, I'm so curious, what did he do? What exactly are you talking about? They're also... He said the brown people... Narcissists cannot evaluate motivation clearly because they're so involved with everything. They can't do it. So there's a lot. You'll notice the trait of the narcissist is, you know that person over there is not doing X, Y, or Z because they're jealous because they saw me, blah, blah, blah. It seems like their motivation has nothing to do with you.

As usual, right. As usual. Yeah. But now Trump is a narcissist, yes? We agree on that. Yes. But in a sort of with a practical application. And by the way, I am not one to...

I don't mind a narcissist who goes, we're going to beat the Nazis. That may be a narcissist, but that has an application. So I was going to say is that be very careful about psychological and psychiatric constructs being strictly speaking pejorative about them because people are paying the ass to be around. If you want somebody flying a fighter plane, you want a fucking narcissist. You want an alcoholic narcissist. Alcoholic, this is exactly who you want a fucking narcissist. You want an alcoholic narcissist. Alcoholic, it's exactly who you want. In fact, I had a friend, a psychiatrist, that used a select for that to put them into the

flight attendant, flight fighter pilot school. He'd go, he'd look for narcissists and alcoholics that were sort of under control. He worked for the Navy and that's what they did in the 50s. Yeah, I mean, look, just to be clear, we're not talking about nipping off a flask in the middle of a sortie. No, look, just to be clear, we're not talking about nipping off a flask in the middle of a sortie. No, no, no. We're talking about drinking hard that when you come back from the sortie.

Yeah, the genetics, the person, a survivor with a bigger-than-life sense of themselves. I was talking to one of the guys that trained me out in the desert and he said, yeah, when you go in, 12 of us go into the Mujahideen, he called it confidence. He goes, you gotta have overconfidence. You gotta be thinking you're gonna do this and not have any doubt about it. Do it. I want that.

Most the people I know with the Trump syndrome are, I think when you're trying to figure out what the gene is, why are these people so greatly affected, it is narcissism. Pure and simple. That's the one overriding, you think it affects you, this is an attack, you know, there's also this kind of, it's a grandiosity where you need to fix the border, the environment, the water, the Indians, it's this thing

where you think you're, I mean, think about the grandiosity of feeling like if we clean up our emissions in California, that's gonna end global warming. You know what I mean? Just think about how big China is and how big India is and how big Africa. And here we are, this little herd of 10 million people in Los Angeles County, and we're like, we're gonna fix it.

We're gonna fix these people who are burning dung for heat somewhere. This thing about the bizarre, say about how grandiose that thought is. So it does feel like the feature that is the most, there's two features of all this. Think about every celebrity that is big into the green movement, all narcissists.

That's all for this week. Thanks for listening to the Adam and Dr. Drew Show Classics. I've been your host, Big Brother Jake, host of the Big Brother Jake Podcast here on the Podcast One Network. Remember to check back each week for new episodes and while you're at it, don't forget to like, subscribe and rate us 5 stars wherever you get your podcasts. Deuces!