The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - Ep. 132 – Red Dead is cancelled

Episode Date: December 6, 2018

its over folks ive made all the clothes

Hello and welcome to the Pussy Radio Hour, where I, a British guy, will be telling you about the types of pussies that I've seen. We're starting first with Adam Friedland's Pussy. It's little and it smells like corned beef. That's right, it is little and tight. But it's just little up front and then in the back it gets really wide. How's that work? It's like an asshole, I'm in it. So the entryway is small, but once you breach it, it's very spacious. So me and my friends hold him down and we fuck his ass and we breach the little part and then we fuck the main part inside. What is this big? It's like sort of David Attenborough doing a push-up.

Yeah, maybe, I don't know man. The radio show called Pussy Radio is describing all the types of pussies. I thought everyone would kind of jump in faster, you know. No, thanks back on Twitter. I was, yeah, no, I'm not back on Twitter. I was trying to find that song. Everybody get my penis on. Everybody get, everybody have a gay ass sex. Everybody get my penis on. Everybody get your penis on. What's going on man? You can't figure it out. There we go. I can't get these wires. Too many fucking wires. I got my damn tube start over here. We did a really good joke. I think we should resay it for the pod. You said it where it was called Reiner. Oh yeah. This is Carl Diner and they only serve

one thing. It's my dick and his old ass. It's been better if it happened in the moment. But I know, listen, I know that. I know that it would have been better, but it had to be saved for the record, for posterity sake. I guess nothing can be for us. No. I swear to God I didn't stop him because it didn't make sense, but I swear to God I saw Christopher walking in the Newark airport. How do you look? Like shit. Damn, my man's flying in the Newark. I mean, I guess it could have been just an old man who lives in Newark. It could have been. That is a high probability. That is a very high possible. I mean, it looked exactly like that's so cool. The king in the actual beautiful day here in Newark.

Yeah, that gets the character mostly is Christopher Walken's voice. Yeah. Yes. I was I was wondering if anywhere here in Newark there was a place to acquire gay sex. I want to know if a fellow like me could perhaps make an acquaintance of another wise guy. Spend some time with him. Maybe maybe in a bathroom, perhaps. I haven't been walking in forever. It's hard to get into. Is that what you call gay guys? Why? Why gay guys call each other wise guys? You know, it's a thing we call each other. It's part of a family. This thing of ours. Yeah, this thing of ours. When you're in the life, you see a gay man has 472 tells a woman has 16 gay men has 472. The Sicilians are born faggots. The Sicilian can always tell

another gay man. Wait, is that his line? I don't remember that movie. Yeah, there you go. And then the Sicilians are born liars because every man has 28 tells women have, you know, 25 man has 22. Whatever it is, catch me if you can. No, it's true romance. Catch me if you can. Yeah. Well, he wasn't you want a chest of field? He offers him. Yeah, I remember that. Yeah. And then Dennis Hopper drops a lot and bombs. Yeah, that was written by Trantino, right? But he didn't do your part eggplant. Yeah. You're part eggplant. I can't do Dennis Hopper. I can barely do walking anymore. No, that was pretty good. Yeah, but I mean, everyone used to do walking. So it was a guy you just didn't do, you know, two

mice. I can't do a doc walks into a bar. He says put it on my bill. That's I thought there was more. I don't know. That's I'm gay. The entire line. I'm gay. There's one thing I love. It's hot Dr. Pepper. This gold watch of my ass for four years. Shut up. Young Christopher walk and look like Angelina Jolie. You guys seen that mean beautiful day here in the New York. Was he a deer hunter? He was. But I'm talking even younger. I thought that was like one of his first things. Yeah, but I'm talking younger. Oh, like before I originally wrote the script for dear hunter was called dear Humper and it was about a man who has sex with this Russian Pennsylvania. She was like what's her name? Merrill was looking like

a dime back then, bro. Yeah, when she was married to Fredo, Merrill could get sliced up back then. Oh, absolutely. I would love to just take a hunting. Slash your fucking face up. Just punching her wildly in the chest. Yeah, and this is this all means sex, by the way. This doesn't mean I just was I mean, while I thought that's just fucking her and just fucking wham just feeling the the hill to look a big hunting knife. Just fucking smack against her sternum. Mm hmm. As I sink that blade right into her fucking. Wow. And what are you talking about? Well, yeah, I just like it. Just feels just makes the sex better. Yeah, that makes sense. Everybody get your penis hard. Everybody get your penis

hard. Yeah. Too bad Fredo died of bone cancer. Yeah. Yeah. What was that? Cavalli John Cavalli was it? Yeah. Yeah. In the four or four legendary roles. John Kovac. John Kovac. Yeah. And then forehead himself. Yeah, big as forehead. The last thing he did before he died, invented the drink Kovac. Yeah. And his legacy lives on to this day. Did white people ever buy that drink? Was that ever for white people? Probably like in the in like the 40s, maybe 1920s or something. What about Hennessy? Do you think white people are ever into that? Yeah. You think so? Mm hmm. What about Grand Marnier? Yeah. Oh, white people still into that today. Really? Oh, yeah. I only associate that with Tony Woods because he used to get

shots of orange liqueur shots at the Tony Woods legend. Shit. I forgot what fucking reads we're supposed to do. I thought I had them all marked down. Take your time, pal. In the meantime, I'll tell everybody about I made a big ass chili on. What was it Sunday? You guys ever make a chili? It's therapeutic, dude. Do you have a slow cooker? You got one of them instant pots? I do not. Everyone's talking about them. Fuck that shit. My shit goes on a pot and I simmer that simmer that motherfucker. You just do it on the stove as God motherfucking intended. Exactly. Old school style. But I but the thing the problem is I've been eating chili now for four days in a row. And my ass is a fucking is a casualty

of that decision. Is there a food that really tears up your ass cheeks? Plenty plenty of food. Yeah. Lots of different foods and other substances. I just I think I have hemorrhoids by the way. I didn't know I didn't know what they were but my ass hurts. It's like a lump on your asshole or something. Is that what it is? I think so. That's all it is. I thought it was. But I think it's from sitting in the toilet too long. Yeah. And then you got to get like one of those rings because your boy just can I be honest with you? I love setting up shop. Yeah, I like doing a 90 10, you know, 10% yeah. I got a whole rig in there. I've been I got some city going on. Yeah, I noticed that you had it. We had one of those. I I

max with the clear blue guy got a whole thing that swivels down. I've got three monitors. I did get all my cities set up. That's you do a lot of crypto there. I do a lot of Sim City just Sim City. Yeah, I'm the mayor of yeah, that's for recreation fictional town. And he's got three different cities going on each screen. Three different kind of one of the model after Nahlins. Nahlins, Louisiana, Nahlins, Maryland. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't know the water. Beautiful Essex, New Orleans, Maryland, completely landlocked. No, the first building was in 1983 post office. We quickly built a blockbuster video. We should buy water from property in Essex. Yeah, and open the Big Easy Cafe. Yeah, and do a New Orleans

themed bar in southeastern Baltimore County. Yeah, bordering Dundalk in the water. That would be great, dude. Water is at the Chesapeake Bay. I don't know. Yeah, nobody knows. Actually, it's actually a interesting piece of trivia. No one knows any of the names of the body of water in Maryland. They've never been named. Really? Yeah, it's just called. No, it's just called the ocean. Yeah, Danny ocean. Yeah. Yeah, I stepped down the ocean step. I put my foot in an ocean. Like even any body water swimming pool. That's the ocean. Yeah, I got too much chlorine in this little piece of the ocean in my backyard over here. Stick on the sink and then the ocean. Now there's an ocean in the sink. Yeah, why they selling bottles

of ocean out. Why does the skink got an ocean? Somebody made a sink. No, the sink. The skink got an ocean. Yo, this fucking ocean tastes fucking weird. Yeah. Yeah, do you have any what's that? That shit? It's like the brown ocean. Oh, you mean Coca Cola? That's what I wanted. This brown ocean is sweet. I hate regular ocean. It doesn't taste like anything. Oh, you mean Coca Cola. Yeah, that's what I was talking about. Yeah, give me you four Coca Cola. Yeah, yeah. Damn, you're smart as fuck. Damn, you're sexy. Yeah, I love a smart woman. I love a smart woman. What are you like 27? I'm 61. Yeah, that's you seem about in that window. Yeah, right between 20 and 62 years old 20 62 year old vibe on

you. Yes. So anyway, do you want to go into my Chevy Cavalier and the backseat and have sex? Damn, you're pussy making so much ocean. Oh, sorry, I have to always do the ocean on the girl's face after I have sex with them. Sorry, I got white ocean all over your Raven shirt. Super Bowl shirt that you are wearing. I see now entirely is a dress. You cinched it with a belt in the middle. And you thought that that was not a shirt for an entire dress to wear out of your house. With slippers done stole from the comfort in. Yeah, that's true. That's a little that's a very little known fact about Baltimore, but they're all calls every piece of water, the ocean. Damn, dude. I'm think so we are we moving? What are we

doing, Nick? What do you mean? The operation? Oh, yeah, we're moving. The operation is moving to Maryland. I have my I have my brief period of trying out crypto currencies trade day trading didn't really work out over lost $60,000. That happens. You lose two down payments on a shitty house on an app on your phone the same way doing the same sensation you get while checking Twitter. Somehow you're down 60 K just for college state school education. More money than I've I've made in the entire but the entirety of my life. I got in a matter of days. I think before we wait for the next. No, no, it's happening. You don't want to buy something and then have everything shut up. Shut up. I mean that shut up. Shut up.

Fuck you. Fuck you, bitch. I'm buying a house down there and I'm going to turn the basement into a studio and then we're going to start doing the podcast down there and bands. We'll have bands and band practice. We're going to have to move down there. We're going to move. Dasha first. Dasha can come to me in my place and then once I want to make sure she's comfortable. Yeah, it's going to be a transition. It'll be the hardest for her. Yeah. I don't know if she's a Baltimore. Oh, she'll be. Oh, she'll be. She'll be. She'll be. I don't get it. Believe me. She'll be taking care of down there. Don't you worry about that. She's going to have a real nice time down there. Why do you smell like the

ocean? Adam, this is looking at me. It's a rude bit about my girlfriend. She didn't have you stop looking at me with who, man. We just said she'll be taken care of. She said she'd be taken care of. We're never going to. Yeah. So we're just going to like take her out to launch. You imply we didn't plan on her face. No, we're saying she could use the podcast studio and then we take her to the beach. Yeah, dude. Ocean City, dude. Ocean City. I know what goes on. You were so insecure. Yeah, dude. This kind of says more about you than it does us. You know what it's what literally it's like. Hey, how's your girlfriend doing? You're like, why are you trying to fuck her? Yeah, dude. We wanted

to get because we know she doesn't want to move to Baltimore. So we're going to make her very comfortable. We don't want her to associate the negative aspects of like the first parts of a movie. This is my assault. My assault week. Okay. And I would appreciate a little bit more respect around just for the week. I told you we're not talking about that on the show. Yeah, we don't have to talk about it, but it is my assault week. So it's like my birthday. All right. Now I've got a little, a little too questiony with me about my dealings with a certain girlfriend. Adam just kept asking to get his share. Adam kept see the thing is Nick's been garnishing Adam's wages. He keeps saying he's going to pay him.

Adam hasn't seen a dime of the pod yet. It's all about making connections. Exactly. So you kept so you just kept asking to get your money and resume. You know, we had to introduce you to the boot. I've said plenty of things that on this show that made me completely unemployable. Yeah, you're making connections in media. Yeah, but I'm trying to make. Yeah, I'm trying to make some connections with, you know, just you guys as friends. I was thinking the other day though, because you know, I always try and find the funniest ways to blow the podcast money and literally just giving it away to Chinese businessmen. I mean, that's so much better than a racing wheel. No, I have. I mean, who do you think takes that

money when you lose it? Oh, true. You're right. Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty cool. I used to go to all these special tax forms at the IRS because I lost a bunch of money to China. Yeah, it looks like you're just laundering money for the Chinese. You lost so much of it. It looks like some complex money laundering. No one's this bad at trading. It looks like you're 60 K into the fucking Chinese mafia. Yeah, which but you know, to be fair is like the most like, you know, like broke just doing a socialist podcast and saying you care woke now that I'm back on Twitter, I'm learning this meme. Whoa, literally just shoveling money into the People's Republic of China. Yeah. Yeah, maybe that's kind of also hedging

our bets for when they delicious pussy, edging your bed. Yeah, that's when you're losing money, but you're beating off. Watch out. Yeah, and not coming and not coming. Yeah, you're you're you're a pay pig to yourself. Oh, that's no dumb bitch could satisfy me the way I need to lose money. That's right. Well, you think some white woman can spend $60,000 on shoes. The Chinese need that for rockets. That's right. It's like giving money to a girl. Why don't you step out of the way you fucking sissy ass low tier pay pigs and watch me become a sex slave to the entire nation of people. Exactly the same. Using Nick's money to put up suicide nets around their buildings. Yeah. Well, suicide fishnets will

dominate tricks. I like that. It gets me hard. I love the idea of a Chinese woman jumping out of the Foxconn factory into that net and it stretches over her legs and she sinks down almost to the ground underneath. Just enough for me to quickly taste her pussy before she bungees. Before she bungees all the way back into just one giant ice cream. Yeah. Yeah. Right back into the factory before she has time to process it. She's just making other phones. It hits her like six years later. Yeah. She sees someone and puts you have been best seat in the house, pal. Hell yeah. Then they sell those seats. Yeah. Tickets to be the pussy taster. Yeah. Foxconn's got a beautiful business model, man. They're good. Are they

going to Wisconsin or did they stop that? Were they going to go to Wisconsin? Not Walker made a deal with them or something. That's awesome. I don't really pay attention to shit anymore. Anyway, yeah. No, it's Foxconn considering iPhone factory in Vietnam. Hell yeah, dude. What happened with Wisconsin? Hey, look, Vietnam is closer to Wisconsin than China is. Before you look it up before you look it up. I don't think that's true. My day. If you're at home now, excuse me, but I won the map contest in fifth grade. And I know that that's wrong. Remember to suck my day. Remember to give Nick head. Remember to suck my entire day and don't ever correct me about the map. I think Indochina is a cooler name in Vietnam.

Yeah. The French had that right. I'll give them that. Yeah. Indochina. Yeah. Yeah, that's cool. Indochina. Yeah. Oh, this is, uh, this is Darko China. Inside deep ass China. Kazakhstan or I think you mean Chinko Russia. I think you mean it's kind of like a Chinkongi Russia. I think you mean and the guy just hold his eyelids back. That kind of Russia. There's no verbal word for it. To pronounce our language, you would have to. And I don't know why Kazakhstan people talk like Africans. Yes, but it reads, you know, like clicks and whistles, but they have just pulling their eyes back. Pull your eyes back with a Russian accent. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Did you see when Borac came out, they got mad about it and they were like, we're

way more Chinese actually. We're being portrayed. Yeah, I'm like, we like to do a math. We do math and we do not go that fuck. Yeah. Our dumpling, we have dumplings, but they're filled with shit. Yeah, real dumplings, actual dumplings. Oh, that's where they get the name. That's disgusting. It would be horrible. You bite into a dumpling. It's just a fucking wet ass turd. With your Chinese girlfriends, you don't want to affect her. Yeah, just a fucking white guy eating it for the first time. He's like, I don't know if these are for me. You just give me a good day to Chinese girl and you go meet her family and you immediately start picking cat turds out of the litter box and just look at her mom like, these are delicious.

Yeah, just try to take a bite out of their live pet. Put your shoes in the cat's litter box and eat in the cat's shit. And look at the cat's asshole. The girlfriend's like, Mark, what are you doing? You're like, I'm trying not to offend your mom. I'm trying to be a good boyfriend. Sorry, Mrs. Lingling. My name is Suzanne. Yeah, I was going to say just named Jerry. I'm from New Jersey. I'm a fucking car salesman. Yes, yeah, we're Hispanic. There's types of there's Mexican people. It looks like they do man. They're like a lot of like, but isn't that because of the land bridge? Like the Native American population looks kind of Asian. Yeah, they do. They definitely do. But some Hispanic, I used to play soccer

look Chinese. Yeah, I used to play soccer in Meridian Hill Park with a bunch of Mexican dudes. And there was this one dude that looked totally Chinese. Everybody would be like cheating no and then they'd laugh at him. It's awesome how racist every other Chinese guy. Oh, I love that. I'm a Hispanic guy. That's a hilarious guy, man. What's the story of chink steaks in Philadelphia? Just some guy with eyes like that. Yeah, is that it? Yeah, legit. Legitimately. No, you're in English. You fucking. No, no, no, no, it was literally called chink steaks. Yeah, it's a place called chink steaks to change your names to like Joe's or something in 2012. Like way later than there's been. Yeah, they still have the

website. Yeah, Pat's and Gino's are the two famous ones. But one of them is racist. Yes, Gino's. Gino's Philadelphia. Yeah, they're both. That's you got to get a to get a license, a business license. You have to be racist. Chinks steaks.com. There's that dead rapper RIP chinks drugs. Great. Good guy. You remember that rapper, Jin, the rapper, your girlfriend had my dumplings. Am I growing her mouth? Do you remember the Punjabi emcee? I need the boogie. It's like my fucking penis. I'm a fucking gig. It's like my fucking dick. Yeah, I love that song. Yeah, you go to chink steaks.com. And then it just says like what makes Philadelphia great? Yeah, I think someone just bought it. Yeah, it doesn't look like it doesn't look

like it's just somebody bought the website. Maybe. And it was chink steaks until. Yeah, take that racist either Joe's formerly chink steaks blog dot angry Asian man.com. Yeah, I mean, it shouldn't be called that. That's got that's a wild thing for a fucking business to be called. That's my favorite type of like online activism is Asian American Pacific Islander guys woke guys. The Asians that are angry. Yeah, like that poet. They got mad at you. Oh, yeah, the poet. Yeah, wanted me to be thrown in jail. Yeah, yeah. Chinese. Well, it's from Singapore, right? Yeah. Yeah, we're like cussing is illegal or whatever. Yeah. How about sing a poor your mom's pussy all over my back? Come over here. You come poor

that pussy. Why don't you sing a song about my dick fucked by your dad's mouth? Hey guy from four years ago. A lot of those guys might get a lot of those guys like used to say the N word six years ago. And not a lot of them still do. My favorite was that bitch Claudia remember literal porn? No, she like sounds like a Korean bitch did like she made her name literal porn because she didn't know that literal wasn't a synonym with literary. Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, so it was like literal was it's like she meant like word porn. I think because she that's brutal. Yeah, her bio was like a writer, the fuck you pay me kind. And then it's like there's zero evidence of her being right. Right. Right.

I think she wrote like one thing about going to a barbecue restaurant how it was like, these Mayo ass white Pete, you know, and then the barbecue was fine. You know, essentially help review that they just let a Chinese woman or whatever woman publish. Claudia is a hot name, I will say. Yeah. Well, anyways, she turned out my favorite part about literal porn is the writing thing didn't work out. So eventually she just became a cam girl. So she ended up doing literal fucking awesome. But she was like an online woke person. Yeah, a lot of those girls will do that shit though. Yeah, but like the N word usey kind like an Asian girl is like, you know, like fucking crack. You know, like, oh, she was like, didn't

I go to every save and the n bomb. Now she's famous as shit. Now she's it feels like she must have at some point. She said it in Oceans 8. I've seen with Rihanna. Yeah. It was pretty fucked up. Dude, I went to that movie in the theaters with Dasha. Yeah, it was during the movie pass. Hey, I straight up any pieces. This is this is great. If you Google literal porn, I just want to see what Claudia was up to. The first thing that comes up is inside Amy Schumer writer Kurt Metzger harasses Twitter personality. And then the right underneath the headline is just a poll quote from Kurt that says, I'm sorry, a white man didn't tip you for anal. Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah, was she a prostitute? I don't know. I don't know.

Now when you say she did literal porn, is there any evidence of that on the Internet? Oh, she's on mastodon. Isn't that the racist one? What's that? Nothing. I'm just looking. She's on mastodon. No, it might be just some mastodon. Isn't that a metal band? Yeah, they fucking rock, bro. Yeah, Adam, you're not allowed to listen to metal. I know. Let me let me know whenever I'm allowed to. I'm ready. What did you did you? So wait, I didn't even realize getting my you didn't you think Oceans 8 was going to be a fucking jam? That must have been a horrible movie. She's got shit. Here's the here's the sound cloud is it? O.G. boss, bitch with dollar signs writer, sociologist with dollar signs, sociologist. Yeah, strategist

with dollar signs, girl, rap, and sex jams. Enthusiast. I like sex. Was she funny? Did she have like ironically funny posts? No, no, it was one of those people that was like because it was early on in the woke days. I mean, I became aware of her because she went after me for the Chinese New Year. It was like, maybe it was that or something else. I don't know. I mean, Asia, it was funny because it was early on and like when Twitter was just really becoming like a fucking mess. Yeah. And and yeah, like Asians were mad at me and I was like, and at the time I didn't understand it because it was like, you're Asian. You know, I mean, I know that sounds ridiculous now, but they're like, how dare

you make fun of Chinese New Year? Well, it's not like you were like, what is it? Who gives a shit about Chinese? Yeah, it's like it was literally the same as if like an Italian was like, would you fucking make a fun of Columbus? Yeah, like I don't fucking care. In those days, I think that was pretty synonymous. There was pretty similar. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean, the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing people he wasn't Chinese or something like that. I don't know what the expression is. Oh, hell yeah, dude. They've hoodwinked all of us. You heard it here first, folks. Satan is a Chinese person. Satan is Chinese. Dude, of course, Satan.

Oh, it's me. Of course. That makes so much sense. Absolutely, dude. Yeah, he's red for drinking. Yeah, he's dry. He's drunk. He's completely amoral. Yeah, ruthless. He's got a big fork. He used to crack turtles. Communism and drinking to kill turtles surrounded by demons. Yep. What else? Fucking what are other what are other things we got a tail as professional comedians? He's got a tail. The right job of how Satan could be Chinese. Yeah, how could say? He lives in a little he lives in a little fucked up basement. Well, hell is like kind of like a sweatshop, maybe. Exactly. There we go. Yeah. So everyone's just for all eternity making iPhones. Well, I'd like to take a moment to talk about bet the aside that you could

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motherfucking black. What if it's just music videos, man? What if ET was it was a very small black guy that was that ashy? Was he like green? No, I think he was like shriveled black ET just Yoda. Yeah, I think so. Somewhat no no Yoda was Jewish. That's why he talked like that. Yeah, that's why you try to get all the good characters yourself. He's black man. Oh, he taught you that switching the switching the code switching. No, it was like to first job lightsaber you want. You know, he says show like that. Yeah, that's true. Well, you you can bet on what race Yoda and Satan are on bet the si.com and user easy to use mobile playing interface play win get paid folks. I love it. Bet the si offers odds

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coming up. I know some of you motherfuckers got slaves. You're waiting to bust out. So true from the sleigh. Yeah. Does that have what the fuck? I don't think I've ever seen a sleigh. I think it was actually slave. I think they should that was a olden days term for slaves. So you don't think slaves used to ride on slaves? How about instead of Mrs. Claus? I don't it's sleigh queen. How about that? Yeah, that's oh wow, beautiful. Who's ready for the fucking holiday? Hillary is kind of like the Mrs. Claus of America. Remember to slay queen to the polls. Take the Ravens fuck the chiefs three three straight. That's right. What Nick said, fuck those Native American shit. They're fucking, they got that running

back that hits women fucking fucking drop the bitch in the face. No, but he learned his lesson by playing more football. No, we at the NFL believe this man should rehabilitate himself by continuing to play football and earn us millions of dollars. Yeah, as part of what he will play in every game until he has learned his lesson. So anyway, bet the USI.com promo code come 120. No, hold on. They offer live in game wagering. You make plays throughout the entire game and events. And here's what we're going to be betting on this week. And the things we already said. So when you sign up, make sure to use promo code come 120 that's CUM 120. So they know we sent you. And when you sign up, you've

got some options you can play and cash out or you can take the bonus dollar sign, which is like getting a casino combo up front for the latest bonus money. It has roll over requirement just like minutes. Oh, yeah, your nights and weekends nights and weekends. Who remembers that shit? We remember it's free chirp chirp on next time. Where you at? Hey, I got no minutes man. Making moves, my dick is small, making moves no minutes. Roll over requirement something about that I said already. So if you're going to be in the sports book, which is where we like to gamble. I love the fucking sports. I love being in the sports book. The only book I love more than we drive to Jersey every Sunday sitting the sports book, we sit

in the sports book, we read the good book, the Lord's book, the jungle book, which I was joking last week. I remember that one. Yeah. Yeah. So you guys teaching him how to teach him. Man, that man taught himself how to fuck in prison. Oh, yeah, that was good. Yeah, this is reading the jungle book, but it's pictures of just like tiger print panties pulled aside, just a big purple pussy up close, up close pics. Honestly, not as bad as it could have been with the setup. I gave you what I like soft, soft version. It was the soft a version of that. Yeah, exactly. That because it got real. Everybody get a soft a. All right, if you use promo code come 120 up to $1,000 are going to give you 60% bonus

cash, which we turn $1,000 into $1,600 to play with. So once again, that's bet the ESI dot com. Come 120. Let's start the show, start the show. Zach, can we go? They call him a faggot. Congrats to Zach getting engaged. Congrats to Zach getting engaged to a woman. Yeah. Yeah, to Dasha, my girlfriend. Yeah, you said he asked first Adam shit or get off the pot. He's like, Adam, I'm getting married to a clown that might be a woman. What a hilarious. I would love to see Zach hang out for an hour. Yeah, she couldn't handle it. Have you seen any of the trouble movies? Yeah, I guess so. He says it's so goddamn. He says the n word quite a bit for no reason. They call him the sniper

baby. How else would a sniper would do? Yeah, just hang out in a room and it's completely safe room a million miles away from black people. Just broadcast it to them through like a scope. Zach Miko, they come up in a tower and the black guy just minding his business in the Bronx and you just hear someone calling him in the morning. He's like, what the fuck? Yeah. Covered in camouflage. Sort of like, yeah, right full megaphone. It's got a scope on it so we can look all the way to the Bronx. He says the n word. Like, why am I hearing the n word? Nice job, doggy. It's done. You got him shots, dude. Yeah, we're gonna have Lewis on tomorrow. You're gonna have to wait. I'm gonna have to make him. I see him. We

should actually have Lewis on his Lewis on our show tomorrow. No, we haven't. We should get him. I don't know. People money. We might have a special money. Other people have done this show. So I got like a backed up. I just paid Greg Stone. I got to pay Anthony. I got to pay Ian. I got to be Bonnie. That's right because here at come time we pay our guests because we're the only socialists. We're the Socialist Journalist Podcast. Yeah, we're Socialist Journalists. We're from that one Socialist magazine. What's it called? Jaco Bean. Jaco Bean. Jack Offman. It's named after Jaco Bean. Yeah, I've got a website called jackoffman.com. I love that. It's a garbage. Just pictures of Angela. Beautiful

Angela. Yeah, I didn't want to say her last name because it's too close to that other word. Yeah, because I consider it any word with that starts with N and has a G somewhere. He won't say. Yeah, everyone hates her. That's why people are mad at her, right? No, they're mad at her for writing an article or something. Oh, I thought it could be because her last name was racist. That's the penis. She went on Tucker Carlson show. So people are mad at her. Tucker Carlson. That guy the fucking loser ass bitch. Tucker Carlson would be a good name for like a drag queen. Absolutely. It's about you putting your dick away. Yeah, that's good. Tucker calls bad. But didn't Tucker Carlson do that? Call Cali bitch.

Yeah, it's from carols bad California with a bow tie. Just huge tits. He's had a good career act too because he was just like some like by being very no name conservative from CNN. Then he got a shit. Then he got a shit rock by John Stewart. That fucking sketch is so goddamn funny. Harry Belafonte. Welcome. Welcome. Welcome. What are you some kind of slave master? Yeah, I'm going to say something. A lot of people are afraid to say Chris Osama bin Laden is an Uncle Tom Jesus Christ. I don't even know who should be offended by that. I will be watching that because it was we were in Cleveland the night McCain died. Oh, that was so that's right. They were honoring all the McCain sketches. That was really fucking

funny. And yeah, we were gone. HWA is dead. I can't really. Oh, yeah. Yeah. My man, having having gay sex with Michelle Obama. You think you think he's eating what's his wife's old ass pussy? No, she's cheating on him already. She started cheating in that month. Joe DiMaggio put a baseball bat in her pussy. It was funny. Punching her in the face. He died. He died and everyone was like it was almost like someone like was like and action. And then everybody like is exactly the predictable people were like honor the man, you know, like the other people are like hell. Yes, war criminal. Yeah. And it's like he was 90 million years old. You didn't own him. You're right. You know, nobody owned them, but it's like you're not

like really pointing anything out. It really is every single time the same thing. It is the same shit every time. That's why I had a good take where I was like, read my lips. My dick is small. Read my pussy. No new bathrooms. But the best part obviously was that Hitler girl that tweet that girl. She would be sad. That was awesome. That was fucking unbelievable. I mean, so, you know, sometimes salute to her. Sometimes you have the same discourse, but you get a new beautiful rose. That's that woman is marriage material. Would you marry her? That's that's a woman that will defend you no matter what you do. She has an opinion on something. It's taking you can rape an entire elementary school. I don't care what

you said, my man. Yeah. Yeah. Good for her. A lot of these cucks wouldn't understand that. How do you feel about your boy Jeffrey Epstein being back in the news now? I think he's not back in the news. There is a huge Miami Herald thing and people are like, like, here's we go. The final nail in the coffin for Trump. And then they quickly realize it like it's a lot of like strange how all the pizza gate people didn't mention this guy. And it's like no, he was a huge part of pizza gate. He was brought up fucking constantly and you didn't give a shit. But he wasn't linked to Trump. He wasn't linked to Trump. No, I mean, yeah, no, people would mention that Trump like flew on the plane. But like my man straight up

just had a plane where you fucked children. Yeah. And and what the fuck? No, no, it was an island. As much as people want to make the Epstein thing a Trump thing, it's like way more Dershowitz Clinton thing. It's all of them. It's all of them. Yes, all these elites fucking suck, but they're not going to throw their boy under the bus. Sure. They don't care. Well, it's also that the secretary of labor cut a deal with him. Yeah, that involved getting every one of those powerful men off and then him serving what, like 11 months in jail, not even in jail. It was like an house arrest. You got to go to work in us. Yeah. Like five days a week. Yeah, from jail. And didn't Dershowitz say he got a massage

from an old Russian bitch at his place? Well, or something. You were there when his guys told Harvard kids. Okay, well, I didn't want to Jesus fucking Christ. I mean, well, we can't tell this story. God damn it. I think we did tell it on the live show. You're supposed to be a fucking lawyer. Come on. That's why we have you on the show. I didn't I didn't go to law school to indemnify us by taking full responsibility for anything said on the show. Legally, Adam is going to do anything about it. I am a performer and all of my lines are written by a writer of come town. It's right. It's like the Kashi 69 in his song. It's just like a millennial Jews version of like self deprecating comedy is an anti

semi and the fat Greek retard for littling and Adam's written every episode of the show. Yeah, he owns all the royalties. He's just like rich as shit. Yeah. It's a writer's room of 11 women of color in me. And I've written every single insult. Yeah. Yeah. It's just how it works. Right. Or a shashi. She just puts ink on her brain. It's her brains and ink and then just shakes her head. Listening to Macy Gray. And then the words that we read on the show. Macy Gray. I try to say goodbye but I'm gay. I try to fuck a woman but I'm gay. I try to hide it. I'm gay. Oh shit. Everybody knows I'm gay. My cock gets hard when I see a man's ass. Well, speaking of your cock getting hard, if your cock doesn't

get hard. Have I got news for you? Oh fuck. There's a new website. It's still going. Are we still alive? Yeah, we're still good. There's a new website now. It's not so new after all. It's called bluetooth.com. And what they do is they sell special medicine. Winky winky baby. Look, it's a dick pill website. They get your fucking cock plump shit, pal. Yeah. You may have noticed that I'm like, I sound stuffed up on the show and it's because I'm actually high on dick pills. That's right. Nick snorts them. Yeah. I get fucked up on dick pills. No. God damn it. Where the fuck is the goddamn copy? Bluetooth.com is a dick pill website to both me and stop personally use. We literally do. We literally do use

this website to get fucking free dick pills. You just fill out a simple form and they send you in discreet packaging, which is labeled custom medicine. No one knows what it is. It's still very funny. Yeah. Just that by the mailman and from across the street. Oh, Mr. Mullen, your custom medicine. It's only coming like us and like old men. Your box of custom. Mm hmm. You know, the one kind of medicine you'd be embarrassed to get. That's the kind coming to you. Here's the thing. I don't give a fuck, dude. Right cockpills are never shot it from the roof. I would say blue chew on there because I want people know how well these fucking dick pills work. Mm hmm. You know, they're so good. I feel

like a 15 year old boy again. I'm going around stealing things acting like a wigger. Not do. Yeah. We're wearing three XL tall tees. Three XL tall. Tell your mom she's gay. Yeah. My mom, the N word playing everybody in the club getting tipsy by what the fuck was that guy's name? Uh, shit. Fuck. One, you can do the jayquan. Yes. Yeah. One hit wonder jayquan. Yeah. Also Ching. Well, for being racist. What? Anyway, yes, we're doing 15 year old. That's our dicks are 15 years old and our brains are 15 years old brain. Dude, it's making me smarter by making me dumber. So true. You know what I mean? A lot of ways that's prescribed online. So these are real prescription pills, real doctors. This isn't

some gas station bullshit. It's not this is a street overlord. Yeah, it's like Tata fill or today. Yes, it's the active ingredients of Seattle's and Viagra. You choose right for you a lot to ladder the foot to down a little filler to Dilip file or or the other one. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what the other one's called. Infant in it. Infant is in fanciliate pianist. Good afternoon. My name is in fanciliate pianist. That's the closest that guy could get to an Italian name in fancy and pianist in fanciliate pianist. Translating my name in your brains. Yeah. Stop it right now. Please. It means baby pain. Yes, of course. Every time I come in here, they make fun of my baby being this.

I come in here and they make fun of my baby being this. They make so much fun of my baby being this. Anyways, the same active ingredient is Viagra and Seattle's the chewables. So they work faster than pills. Your cock can get hard lickety split. You know, I would be lying if I if I told you I didn't accidentally eat too many of them because I didn't feel like going to the bodega to get candy. That's right. Yep. Nick's cock is poking Adam in the eye right now. Right. I've had too much of my custom medicine. Sorry. I have a headache from eating too much custom medicine. If you see a man whose head hurts and he's just hard and sweatpants. He's OD on custom medicine. Yeah. It's like that. I'm gonna start a website

called the custom gentleman and I wear a tuxedo top and I'm just my eyes are swollen shut from overdosing on custom medicine. I got a pair of sweatpants. Just gray sweatpants. Yeah. It only takes a few minutes to fill out a form online. You got no doctor visit, no awkward conversation where you have to sit at the doctor and say oh yeah I need these pills like to have straight sex. One time no joke. I mean finish the reading then I'll tell the story. No doctor visit, no awkward conversation, no waiting in line at the pharmacy. Ships directly to your door in discreet packaging. They're prescribed online by a doctor made here in the USA. So if you want to bring jobs back from those bastard Chinese, those bastards

over there. If you want your dick hard and some Chinese out of work, we got a fucking itchy solution for you. Absolute pigs over in China. I personally lost $60,000 of those pills. It's just shipping it over. The only reason I haven't killed myself is because my dick is so hard. Rock fucking hard. Bluetooth gives you confidence in bed every time. You and your partner and your partner will love it. Shoe it and do it. Hell yeah. Here's a great deal for you guys. Visit bluetooth.com and get your first order free when you use the promo code come town. These are free dick pills. Come on man. You pay $5 for shipping. And your cock stays hard for a month. You know what you can also pay $5 for? Our patreon

episodes which will also get your dick hard. That's right. You plug the headphones into your cock. You take a splitter and you put one side on your cock for years. The price of a cup of New York coffee a month. That's $10. You can get your dick hard and listen to premium come town episodes. Be like us. You want to be our friends? Our friend? You want to pretend like we're friends with you? Yes. Do not show up to the dojo. The Burt Crusher manhole podcast dojo for awesome radical dudes that do beer together. You want to be in the chimp zone? Joe Rogan's chimp zone? I don't know about that one man. I don't know. You want to be one of Mark Maron's what the what the fuck are you? What the Jews? Some

what the Israelites? What the kikes? Listen, what then? What the fuck sticks? What the fuck are you kids? What the fuck mullet? Mark the fucking wops, the gooks, the specs, the scum of the earth, the carlin bit where he just lists every slur, cheering, Spook Spick's guineas, whops, faggots, chicks, please finish the read man. No, we're not. No, we're not. We're not. You can take them any time day or night. Peterson the morning. When you got custom medicine, you can have your penis any time. Bagel bites now includes dick pills for children. Go to bluetooth.com to get some dick pills for your son. You want to get your child hard. He's got a line of bagel bite cockpills. It's just a quick like a shitty

90s commercial. It's like a kid at baseball practice and he's striking out and his dad's like, come on, Ben, come on, he strikes out and he's like, God, you know, and then he's like cheering the kid on and the kid's like trying to like drop drop in on a half bite. He's like, come on, Betty, you can do it. And the kid's like, I'm scared. He's like, God, damn it. You know, and it's like disappointed in your son. Yeah. Then it's like bagel bites pizza in the morning. And then the dad's like slipping viagra to the bagel bites. And then the kid's dick is really hard playing sports. And he's like, that's my boy. That's my fucking boy out there. He still sucks at everything, but his cock is rock hard. Anyways, bluetooth.com.

There we go. The point about getting your doctor to give you dick pills is when I was young and I just wanted I did just want a dick pill for like my check off with no, no, I was fucking but I wanted to take my cock to the absolute next level. Okay, it was functional. But I was like, I was like, I was like, yeah, I read, um, I've been pissing too much. And I read on the internet that see Alice can help with that. And it didn't work. And he was like, ah, fuck it. I'll give you a trial. I just had like these dick pills. My friend David took his dad's viagra to sleep over when we're like 13. Nice. And he raped everyone. He just had like, we were, he was just sitting there with like a really hard. You start crying.

He was like, we were like 13, dude. None of us had even sniffed a pussy, but we all started jacking off around the same time. Right. And he wanted to be hard for when you all jacked off together. One of my dad's dick pills and he's like, it's gonna be so funny. And he's just had a boner for eight hours. We were like, should we tell your parents? He's like, don't fucking tell my parents. My dad's gonna be so pissed. It's so fun. That same kid we used to, we used to straight up steal his dad's car, like his dad's Ford Expedition when we'd like, we're like 14. Nice. We'd like drive across town. I think it's hilarious. If they if his parents came in and saw him hard as shit, and he didn't, that just means he wanted

to fuck all his friends. That was a fun house. Like his parents would be in their bedroom. We just like smell weed wafting out. Hell yeah. They used to have like parents parties where like everyone would just get wasted. My parents would be there. Everyone was like blackout. It was like a party. It was like snow. But like we'd be there as kids, but like it was like seeing parents like getting fucked up. And my dad, my dad, one of your friends, my dad told me when he was like blackout, he's like, he's like, yeah, David's mom just told me she had laser hair removal on her. Adam, I have great news. David's mother has removed her purpose. He is totally bald, Adam.

Just like yours. They were smoking marijuana in the jacuzzi. And she told us about a laser hair removal of her pussy. It was pretty. Did everybody get a taste? I don't think everyone got a taste. But that's gross, man. Cover that shit up, man. Cover up the pussy hole. Cover up the hole. Pussy ears. More hair. Yeah. I love pussy hair. I'm on the record. You love it. Yeah. Yeah. Not like a fucking Lanny Kravitz situation. I'm drinking girls pee now. Oh yeah. Yeah, you're talking a lot more about this challenge. Well, it's just because I'm trying to I'm going to figure out what the next move is. You know, that's interesting. I'm a master of timing the markets. Of course. Now I'm going to start preemptively

drinking piss just so I can say I told you so that it was going to be the new ass. Drake says something. Right. Yeah, right. And that doesn't happen. I'm just standing there with this cover. Your jowls cover this is piss seeping out of my mouth. And I go, damn, the Chinese guy smiling in the background. We got him again. We have got him a second time on the crisp and why is money and then what that Neil Neil deGrasse Tyson is a rapist. So you know, yeah, when some of you lose some you can sometimes you call him right. I have insider information. What are you? No, no reason. Because as all I said was insider information. Yeah, I know. And it's funny that you have that. Yeah. Where do you get it from? All

I'm saying is I have insider information. What? Why is that funny? No, it's just funny that you have you claim to have insider information in the scientific community. Like from who scientific community. Yeah. So I am a member of the side. Why is that funny? It's not funny. It's funny because you're dumb and you don't know. Yeah, we're laughing. I know something about that scientist. Yeah. I just that's all I'm saying. Yeah, it's really funny, dude. What did he do for real? Did he he like put his fingers in someone's really weird? Like he was shaking a woman's hand for too long. What was that? Is that right? Are you hugged her for too long? No, I read it and I just like did a control F for creepy. And as soon

as I saw that, I was like, oh, he didn't do anything wrong. What was it? You sent it to us, right? Creepy behavior. And then it was like, there was one part of it was like, when she broke off the incredibly creepy and awkward handshake. And it was like, this is bullshit. Didn't he like asked to see someone's like tattoo? No, she showed him a tattoo. There's a picture of it happening. Oh, nice. She's showing him a tattoo of the solar system on her shoulder blade or whatever. And he was like, Oh, where's Pluto or whatever. Nice. Which is like something you would do. No, it's not. Yeah, it is nowhere near as attractive as as a DGT. I would not double GT. I would not ask to see Pluto on someone's double

G. That's what he likes to be called. No, he doesn't. There's not. There's only one G in his name. Don't add cheese, man. That's not it. He says he likes to be called that. He does not. How did you make this one? Well, which is about rape, racist. Anyway, I don't know. I don't give a fuck. I don't understand why. It'll keep being funny to me until it's not a problem anymore. What racism? Yeah, racism isn't. Oh, yeah. Of course. Remembering today that Larry said the N word, not on one episode of curb, but on two episodes of curb. Yeah. Crazy eyes, kill up crazy eyes, kill it and the one where he hears the guy say it and then he repeats it to someone else and they think that he said it. And then he says it in front of the judge again at the end of the episode. That's pretty funny. So I guess you're saying is if he's canceled, probably canceled. It's it's funny. It would be funny to doctor something Larry David said and throw that in there. Like edit it together that he's calling someone that then we could cancel him. Yeah. How about Larry gave it and it's an MP4 file. And he's like, so I can see a penis. I can take a look at it. Yeah, that's good. I like that. I definitely like that a lot. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I guess you just tried to see some woman's tattoo. Also, like, what's he going to be fired from memes? Yeah, tweeting dumb shit about stars. Yeah, it's like Sulu, Sulu, Sulu raped that guy or whatever he did drugged and grope some guy. Yeah. And then denied it and then said it was Russian bots. That was awesome. Yeah, yeah. Russian bots to cover up your gay rapist. Yeah, I know. But it's like, what is what happens to him? They just don't tweet or retweet him anymore. Yeah, but they still do. They didn't. That's the thing, dude. Memes are the most stealing memes apparently is the best best job security. Yeah. My man just became rich off stealing people.

I love to have sex with men who are passed out. I want to rape a man. What I said was is that when Donald Trump does it, it's bad. But when I do it, it is ancient Japanese. Shots out to my man, George, get raping and getting away with it. Yeah, it was a pretty good article in the New York Times yesterday. And you know what? Let me retract that shout out because I'm actually not a fan of people raping and getting away with it. They're new pork times, but you see a bunch of pigs. Oh, that's good. A bunch of it's not me. New Chinese. You see that girl, that girl and stop wearing a wig. Did an article. First of all, that's you and me, motherfucker. You're even. I don't know if she looks like me so much. But the other one you literally look just like you guys. You guys look exactly the same as the other one looks like stop. You you and Eve are identical twins. You literally I wouldn't say that. She's taller. She's about six inches. She's starting to remake a sister sister to Mara Goldstein. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I don't know how much I missed you. I don't want to talk shit about her because she is a fellow stand up comedian.

Yeah, we shouldn't drag someone in our field. Solidarity. What the fuck was that article? Have any of you ever heard of Alex? Yeah. When he penetrated my kike cunt. My red kike cunt. That could be a line from you. I can't believe you're stealing your bit. Yeah, that's my whole act. I was thinking about buying they sell them on Amazon, but like a big pair of giant novelty scissors for when they open like a mall or something. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then just keep tweeting at her like these are the scissors I'm going to use to kill you with and see if I get banned. That'd be funny. Yeah. That'd be very funny. It would be funny. Yeah. With for to who? Sorry. I was trying to threaten to cut Eve's head off with a giant pair of scissors. I must say I don't exactly get the bit, but well, it's just such a funny specific thread. Oh, to cut them off with novelty scissors. Yeah. With a big pair of, you know, like a ribbon. Yeah, because they sell them on Amazon. Yeah. You know, you couldn't technically actually do that. They're not very strong scissors. Yeah. They're all right. You know what? I'm in for a mall. Yeah. That'd be a good way just to get banned again.

And then have the police shut the contest. I mean, look, this is one of those things that I'll do and then I regret doing it. Why did I do it? And then years later, I was like, Oh, it's for the bid. And then you're like, I guess it was pretty funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But if I went to jail for threatening, oh my God, that would be incredible. You're threatening to kill somebody with novelty scissors. If you're literally like in court and like, how do you plead? Yeah. The scissors are tagged as evidence. You don't have to hold it up in court. Examinate. You're just smiling in court. You're laughing. I'm testifying for the prosecution. I'm pointing like that picture of the snitch. And he purchased the scissors and had them on his persons ready to use. This was a deliberate act. This was premeditated. He intended to kill this woman with the giant scissors. Now, you'd have to get the high pitched voice guy for making a murderer to put you behind that or like some sort of functioning giant gun, you know, like a revolver that was like six feet. Yeah. Or a cannon ball and cannon. Shooter point blank with a cannon. I'm just shooting with a cannon. Something that like Wiley Coyote would do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. To go to a big stick of dynamite. Right. To go to prison for something like that would be very funny. Yeah, I agree. If Pizer's dead, as Nick Drew painted a ton of an open field in front of a tunnel. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. Yeah. But that was that was a good satire. But I love satire. And I love stuff for the record. Adam doesn't plan on doing that. I'm just going to do. Come on, man. Adam wasn't discussing this earlier as his actual plan. And then I was saving him by saying it was me. Yeah. He's making credible threats. All legal. All legal ramifications to be set by everything on the podcast. I have already stated that I copyrighted all these 2017 or whatever. Are we done? Oh, yeah. I don't know what copyright means. Yeah. Like legal copyright.

Copyright is in trouble for the show. If you're in DC this weekend, come see me the seventh and eighth at the DC motherfucking draft house, bitch. And then the week after Indianapolis on the 13th, Columbus and Cincinnati. One of them is on the 14th. One of them is on the 15th and then Cleveland on the 16th by tickets to that. And then let Phoenix just announced that motherfucker, the 19th at Valley Bar. And I'm also in Pittsburgh and Buffalo the week before that in LA February 2nd by tickets to come see my little bitch ass. Also sign up for the premium episodes of patreon.com slash come town. Overtake last podcast on the left. Yeah, last penis in my ass. Honestly, I think it's absolutely fucking absurd that they're ahead of us. I can't believe they are either. Have they been doing it longer?

They have. Well, let's fuck them up, dude. We will. So yeah, fuck those assholes. That story about being in Starbucks at one time. It was like when I first moved to New York, it was the Starbucks over on Astor Place. I was like sitting at the counter. And there was a guy next to me and I thought he was on the phone. He was like, I'm just no, you tell them, put me on. No, you just tell them. Just put me on.

I'm telling you, I can do this. I was born for radio. I was meant to do radio. I was born for this. You'll put me on. You can and you will. And I look over and you know, it's just an insane person. And he's like having some like and it went on like that for an hour. It's just repeating him like trying to convince some guy to put him on the radio. That's awesome because he knew he was going to be like a broadcast. Oh, yeah. And I had this like moment because like, you know, I didn't have any fucking money. I was like making a little bit of money writing. But I'd been doing comedy a while and wasn't going anywhere.

And I'm like, fuck, what's going to happen? There's going to be this. Well, you're not. Also, the last funny moms of the year is on Monday, this upcoming Monday, whatever the date is of that. It's going to be a really good one. I think we got some good people on it. Yeah, we haven't booked anyone yet, but I think Joe might be doing it. Nice. Joe who? Joe. Para or list, maybe both Joe.

Peepee Joe. Pussy penis. Yeah, I'm a real good son of that Joe power guy. But yeah, it's December 10th. Funny moms December 10th, last one of the year. And then it's I think Christmas Eve is the next one. So we're not going to do it. I believe I might do it.

It's Christmas Eve. Just for the J. Oh, I'm going to be. I'm going to be able to probably sell some tickets on Christmas. Christmas Eve, not Christmas, Steve. Yeah, we could sell them, but then the problem is if people find out it's just you. Are they still going to come? You know what I mean? I think I think that some would. I think some some people just pretend we're going to be there.

Okay, I'll we're all going to be there. We're all going to be there. All right, guys. Have a good night. And also, I don't want to comment on an active New York Police Department investigation. We have the anti-terrorist squad looking into my assault. But oh yeah, we will get you some black man ran up to Adam with a giant pair of

scissors. His nose off. So Adam started punching himself in the face until the guy let him let you guys laugh. But when you see that giant pair of scissors coming towards you, it is terrifying. Yeah, it's fight or flight. So Adam chose fighting himself. I thought it would honestly be so funny to see like a prosecutor pointing to a

diagram with a drawing of me in a hot air balloon holding the giant scissors while like Eve unsuspecting walks down the street. Yeah, you're dangling them. And this was his plan. Fucking top hat. All right. That's it for us boys and girls. Thank you.