The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - Ep. 163 – And there it is

Episode Date: July 11, 2019

it is all being revealed. and crypto has returned. and soon we will all walk together into the light

Okay. Alright, let's go. Okay. Did we already do Epstein? I don't know, I wasn't here for the last episode. I can't remember. But you should, I mean you deserve to be taking your victory lap right now. Yeah, I guess. They're assigning a lot of credit to the Miami newspaper. Yeah, and they didn't do anything. That's a bunch of coked up Cuban retards. And they know that that's my opinion, which is why they've stolen all my work. Yes. They have no appreciation for what we did on this show. This was your Pentagon paper. I really do. I mean, the degree in which like liberals on Twitter have like, like myopia about Bill Clinton. Yes. Yeah. You know, the initial take was like, Yeah, we don't like any pedophile. And it's like, Oh, time to retweet

the statement from the Clinton family. It's like just an outright lie. Did you see someone had a tweet that was like, he like called a bunch of like billionaire hedge fund guys. And there was like a tweet that's like, none of them agreed to say how Epstein made his money. Yeah, but he got all his money from that, from that, the, the Victoria's Secret guy, which guy, the Victoria's Secret guy. That's the guy that owns Victoria's Secret or whatever. Yeah. And it also like the limited to it's some billionaire that owns like nothing but like panties for little girls and companies. Yeah. And he like, he was the only client of Epstein's hedge fund. Like on record. Yeah. And what if he was just making all his money off a child porn? He was. And he was

the guy that sold Epstein his mansion. His like giant mansion. Yeah. My buddy Owen went to the mansion yesterday to take pics of like the cops raiding it. Yeah. Yeah. That's gotta be cool. Yeah. It was cool. Yeah. He went to the Upper East side to take pics. Yeah. So just for everyone worried, stop us in the bathroom. He's he's here now. It's a dookie. Yeah. From what I've heard, it sounds pretty nice. His place? Yeah. Because there's like another story. He has a fucking mansion on the Upper East side. Incredible. Yeah. Some girl. All the child porn you want. Right. There's some girl that that came that like is also accusing in this 32 and they profiled her and she'd like described her time there at Epstein's place or whatever. And she's like, you know,

he brought me in and all the rooms were like opulent. There's a lot like artwork and painting and stuff. And it's just like, I mean, I know he has a lot of money, but it's like, fuck, even if I had that amount of money, I would have like the kind of house that, you know, it would just look like a renter center showroom. So you think he deserves some credit for his interior designing? No, it's just fucked up that somebody that's like raping kids is like better than you in almost every other aspect. Well, the Catholic Church, I mean, they have impeccable taste. That is true. Well, it's a little gaudy for me. But the Catholic Church is like the internal in the eternal war between whether you should fuck kids or not. It's not like the Catholic Church is

entirely pro fucking kids. It's that their kid fucking elements have taken over the church. Oh, and it's a battle for an apology. I don't know, man. Battle for good versus evil, which they can sliding more and more into track. I think it showed. Don't tell. And they fucked way more kids than they haven't fucked. Or actually, I guess they probably haven't fucked. I guess you're right. I guess that's true. Well, so you're saying he's got he's a good interior decorator. Well, he probably hired somebody to do that. It's just that he has a nicer house. Yeah, it's like, you know, yeah, it's just it's fucked up that we live in a world where pedophiles end up having the most money. They were the guys that got into Bitcoin early. True to buy

boy pussy, which if you didn't, you just get fucked. Yeah, markets will just destroy and it all comes back. Yeah, they call them they call them whales. Yeah. The guys that have a lot of Bitcoin, but they're just pedophiles. Now, I think, though, you're being unfair. I think the vast majority of pedophiles do not have good taste. You're just picking on the the one with the ones that are caught. I mean, you know, it's like that's it's a class issue. Yeah. I mean, it's like, like, it's always your white trash. So much of media has like driven into people's heads. The idea that a pedophile is somebody with like glasses and a mustache lives in their parents bay like the guy from one hour photo. Yeah. And nobody else. No, it's like it's a yeah,

it's like an expression of like shitty behavior that like any other type of shitty behavior expresses itself across like class or of course. Yeah, you know, mental disorder. All right. In my opinion, except black people, we need more. They love black girl pedophiles. Black guys are all about like they just they're constantly talking about pussy. So you know where they stand. Right. Exactly. Yeah. Which is the reason why I feel most comfortable around. Yeah, that's why it was so easy to exploit them because we knew exactly what they want. English, you have no idea. You're like, are they gay or they straight? Who knows what these people? Yeah, there is a real question. They fucking raided your country and taken all your spices. And that was the thing for

spices. Yeah, just to make shitty bangers and mash. Yeah, I don't taste any fucking turmeric in this. Yeah, what the fuck were you raping India for the English only fuck for political reasons. I mean, I guess fucking has been a mechanism of war for all of human history. Like you raid a place and then you just fuck everyone there. Yeah, which is rude. I started watching Rome again. I love it. Ronan. Yeah. Rome. Yeah. They do a lot of tightest pullo. A lot of political fucking. What about tightest cool? Oh, and it's a gay Puerto Rican Roman with a huge ass. The two and like protagonist picked up on the show. Lucius Varinas and and Titus Polo. The first episode, Lucius Varinas is like committed like they like they have him specifically go torture Gauls to find out

where, you know, Hitler's Eagle is where what Hitler's Eagle. Yeah. Well, Hitler and Caesar are synonymous. Oh, the Nazis were inspired by Rome. Yeah. Because the Nazis weren't doing gay shit. Were they? Oh, yeah. Of course, weren't they killing you guys? Not compared to like the Weimar Republic. That was like way gayer. Is that the guys with the like big mustaches in the metal helmets? That was like the roaring 20s. Yeah, it was the interim period between like Imperial Germany and Nazi Germany, where they were like, let's just we'll all like fuck, we'll do whatever we want. Yeah, it was just incredibly like Libertine. Nice. So you're saying they deserve the Nazis for their sin. And then that's what you fucking you blow the doors off. You don't have any limits.

You let people fuck kids left and right. Yeah, that's what happens. So we'll say about Rome, too. Here's my question, though, this Libertine guys or whatever the the Weimar's, what's their diet looking like? Because if they're eating schnitzels and fucking bratwurst and shit, and you're fucking each other in the ass, I don't know if it's about food. But I'm saying what I'm saying is if it's a but fucking society, you'd think they'd eat a lighter meal. Did the schnitzel German cuisine develop post gay set, although now I understand you can't have dairy for 24 hours before you get before you buy your ass. Did they understand that from getting fucked? Yeah, did they invent fucking colonics? Did they invent? What's the other shit called we put water in your ass and

it flushed it out. They invented animal. Animal. Thank you, Nick. They invented basement techno actually. That was when that's when they do you know that place? Bergheim, the big club. Yeah, I'm there. I'm a regular the bottom. The basement apparently is a is a black room. And it's just you just there's Shiza everywhere and calm. And it's just hands touching each other. Oh, that sounds horrible. Yeah, it sounds really scary. That sounds like hell with like a base, like a thumping base in the background. That literally sounds a dark room where you're just getting come on fucked in the ass. Yeah. And even if you like getting fucked in the ass, you think you'd want to know being in control of the situation. Didn't someone there was someone

posted a pic that they were they took like a freezer mold that was a dick shape and they took a shit in it. And then they brought they brought it to like the club to fuck people with a with a shit thing frozen. Well, that's not bad. You shit it out. Yeah, I guess so. That's the appropriate place for shit to go. Also, don't they do a shit transplant where you have to eat shit? No, they just I think they just put it in your ass. I think they do that in the scientific community for like experiments on animals. No, no, no, I think it can solve like certain like a transfecal. Yes, you know, that's a real thing. So what I'm saying is maybe Bergheim. That's a cool way to both get fucked in your ass and jerk off and get a transfecal transplant. Perhaps. Yeah,

just I'm just spitballing. We moved on from Epstein. But did you see that he had a fight like a huge meat grinder shipped to his fucking what to his either his island or his home like an industrial yes. No, motherfucker. I'm kids. Yes, that's what people are saying for kid burgers. He wasn't eating. I don't know the problem with the Epstein coverage is like the anti semaphore system because because it like it proves to get right now. Like the struggle is like, you know, right wing news sources are going to be like, yeah, and, you know, Hillary Clinton was there and she was, you know, together and then the it's going to be like even more like nobody's going to report accurately on anything. Right. Smoke screen. Right. It's going to be then the

mainstream media being like, and Bill Clinton did nothing wrong and he had no knowledge, you know, and there's not going to be any in between where I mean, it's going to be very difficult to figure out like exactly what is true and what isn't. Well, there's going to be like an FBI investigation like that Seth Rich thing or whatever. Well, isn't that just totally not? Didn't that not happen? I mean, Seth Rich was murdered. Right. Yeah. Did some shit say that like Russians plans and intelligence like like, like, yeah, like actually did. Well, there's nothing to plan. He was murdered like that in terms of like starting work for the DNC. He did work for the DNC starting rumors that he was like involved in the email hack somehow or that he was like it was a cover up murder.

That's like what the story is. But Seth Rich was still murdered. You know, I mean, it didn't like not happen. Interesting. Seth, get out of here. Yeah, as a child in my pussy. I guess with that one, it's like I never really thought that, you know, there was any conspiracy there. But it was a kind of thing that Fox News report on another kind of thing Fox News report on is Clinton's ties to fucking Epstein consistently, right? Like over the last like, you know, decade or so and nobody gave a shit now. And then it's the same people being like, well, we know, oh, they don't care. Now the Trump's involved. It's like, no, they have cared. People have cared for a long time. You you were the one that didn't care. Yeah, it's not Hillary Clinton's fault, though. I think it

is sexist to say that. Absolutely. It's not her fault that she knew about her husband and covered up him. Well, look, Kamala had like the same way to advance her career. Kamala had to lock up parents that whose children didn't go to school to show she's tough on crime. That's what you expect out of women. Hillary had to fuck kids. She had to fuck kids to rise in the building bird group or whatever. There's a there's an expectation of women that they that they don't fuck kids. Exactly. She has to prove it. She has to prove her. Yep. She's better than the average. I don't know. Claire McCaskill. That's some bitch, right? What was it? Epstein's thing was like little kids. I thought it was just teen girls giving a massage. Yeah, it's like 14 years old. That's I love that. That's

another awesome takes. The aphibophilia take is awesome where they're like, hey, whoa, whoa. The guys that put that on record is incredible. They they have their name and their face next to your avatar is right. Let's figure this look. He did what he did was bad, but there's a big difference between fucking nine year olds and 14 year olds. Well, there used to be an argument for specificity in language or whatever that you can't really make anymore because like people don't care. Yeah, it's like like saying that like, you know, people are like one in four women are raped on college campuses. And it's like, that's not accurate. Even like by those own like wherever that fucking study came from, it was like one in six. But to be the guy they said that's under

reported. The guy that's like it's one in six. Right. That's like not anymore. I mean, fucking like six, seven years ago. Oh, you got that wrong. But now if you're like 100% of women are raped and you're like, well, there's no way that. Yeah. And that you're a rape. Yeah, exactly. I feel like libertarian guys are the last guys like if you last guys hold now being like, listen, it was 5.8. They're like, they're like, oh, what actually you mean? Actually, it's like, bitch, you said a number. Yeah, you decided to make if you said most that would be fine. Or some like you decided a big ass chunk of a big, yeah, qualifier. You decided to use a specific number of fraction. Yeah, bitch, don't be saying fractions at me. Don't say fractions. I can't stand what a

bitch uses a fraction. No denominators, bitch. I don't want to see a numerator or a motherfucking denominator. Trying to make me do math. Well, it's and it doesn't matter anymore. But it's just like it's like you kind of lose the autistic people when you start doing that and you you're like intentionally fudging numbers when you shouldn't have to like saying like, oh, there's like a discrepancy in what women are paid versus what men are paid is like, that's an argument you can like go into and like, you know, make a point with when you say women are paid 70 cents for every dollar men make. It's like, well, there's a million ways to disprove that. There's like a million metrics in which you can like throw at that. And it's like not an accurate number, but

they want to you want to like hold on to the 70 cents line. And it's like, well, now you've just now you're just arguing about statistics with people. Yeah, right. It's not addressing the underlying fucking issue that they are underpaid. Right. And the reasons for that and what the solution is and like how things could change. Yeah, you know, and it's like, because all of these arguments are made for dumb people that can only consume simple things like seven out of 100, which thank you for that. Yeah, 70%. That would that be 70 out of 100? Oh, yeah, 70 out of 100. Wow. I can just keep repeating the smart guy now. You are. That was quick math. I almost got tight because Nick was saying fractions, but then I remembered he's a bro. So we got to let it go.

He's only he's one of the brothers. So yeah, so I guess like, is it costly going to get caught up in this or no? Nancy Pelosi was like, look, that's up to Trump. Fucking loser. What a dumbass. I hope this will give a big boost to I don't want them to resign. I mean, like that, like they people are calling for his head to roll as if that's like the fucking that's who like he's the one who fucked the cat's where the buck stopped as with fucking Acosta. But if you remember, he was like, it's like, because like calling for Acosta to resign is like totally a move just like make like draw the attention away from Clinton.

They're going to do that now instead of like for a while there, like Trump Epstein was trending on Twitter. But like that quote about like Trump said, Jeffrey Epstein was a great guy, you know, like blah, blah, blah, blah. And it's like the New York Times covered it. And it says like, oh, Trump said that Epstein was a terrific guy, not a fan anymore. And then you read the article and it says in 2002, Trump spoke to the New York Times and said that or New York magazine and said that, you know, Epstein's a great guy. But if you click where it says New York magazine and go to that magazine, the next two paragraphs after that are about his relationship with Bill Clinton. It's like directly the next one. Yeah, it's one. It's like one thing that Trump said he's like,

yeah, he likes beautiful women. And the next thing you're like, many on the younger side, many on the younger side. And then the next thing is like, Jeffrey Epstein loves Bill Clinton and their best friends and they fly around the world, you know, and then Clinton's like Jeff is a genius and he knows everything. I had a great time with him in Africa. I took his plane to Africa. Yeah. And so it's like, you're deliberately like miss like you're like downplaying the represent like if you look the way the New York Times covered it here, it's like these are their two headlines. Whereas it Epstein was a terrific guy, Trump once said now he's not a fan and then a smaller headline under Oh, they got rid of it. It was before there was a much smaller headline

underneath one that says what what exactly is the connection between Bill Clinton and Jeffrey Epstein? Nice. And then you read the article and it's like, you know, it's vague and they're like, sure they had some kind of need you motherfuckers to take that down. I feel like it's extra sinister to go to Africa and fuck kids there. You know, those kids that really have X, you know, I know. Yeah, that's brutal. Right there. That's the I agree. We're talking about that at the live show. We should like, yeah, they should be fucking. What's the best for first world kids? They had a great life, you know, whose parents were there. Yeah, and I guess you had access to mental health care. You know, right, I suppose. I don't know that there is the right kid didn't have flies on

their face. That's true. That is rude to fuck a child. It's rude or to fuck a kid who's dehydrated. Yeah, who's stoned. At least give them PDLA for malnutrition. Yeah, Jesus Christ. Yeah. Yeah, Bill. Here it is. Bill Clinton and Jeffrey Epstein. How are they connected? It's not even on the front page anymore. Now, it's just a related story on that rocks. But it looks like in 2002, but in the Clinton article, it like the it immediately starts talking about his connection to Trump. Awesome. Oh, wow. But it is Mr. Epstein's ties to two United States presidents, Bill Clinton and Donald Trump that have drawn the most attention in recent days. In 2002, Mr. Trump called Mr. Epstein a terrific guy in an interview with New York magazine. But on Tuesday,

Trump told reporters he was not a fan. Mr. Epstein. Not a fan. You're right. It's falling out. Not my cup of tea. Right. Mr. Clinton has denied having a close relationship with Epstein. But if you look at the New York magazine article that they themselves linked to highlight that Donald Trump quote, it's it goes in detail. Yeah, about how they have specifically like a close relationship. Yeah. Damn, dude. I mean, Bill on the flight logs to go to the islands or just to Africa. He's he's on 26 or 27 different flight. And but the statement is obviously, you know, it's not an idiot. So these these statements are calculated. So it says President Clinton knows nothing about the terrible crimes Jeffrey Epstein pleaded guilty to in Florida some years ago.

So that makes it specifically about that. Yes. Right. Not additional. Nothing about yeah. Right. Exactly. Or happened or those which has been recently charged with in New York. So these are new ones in 2002 and 2003. President Clinton took a total of four trips on Jeffrey Epstein's airplane. One to Europe, one to Asia and two to Africa. Damn, these motherfuckers were doing the like, which included stops in connection with with the work of the Clinton Foundation. International players, a total of four trips. International players. Anthem was about Yeah, fucking children on every continent. Four trips. And those four trips will obviously include multiple flights. So getting to Asia, maybe maybe you have two or three different

flights on the way back. Same thing. You got to refuel. Yeah, refuel stuff like that. I mean, it's a private jet. So it's not like, oh, we had to connect, you know, go to customs, whatever. Yeah. So I mean, I'll give you at most, you know, five, five trips for four flights, you know, for four, five flights for four trips or whatever, that's 20, you know, but then they selectively say 2002 and 2003. So those are only covering those years. So we can like, you know, we can infer that there are other flights, different years. Yeah, I mean, it's he probably from 2000 to 2002 was right after he got off, right after he got out of being the president, you know, he was like, yeah, gotta get my fill of some little kid. One meeting

with Epstein in his Harlem office in 2000, my boy summer 2000. And around the same time made one brief visit to Epstein's New York apartment with a staff member in his security detail. He's not spoken to Epstein and well over a decade and he has never been to Little Saint James Island, Epstein's Ranch in New Mexico. That was my question. What's it called Little Saint James? Yeah, but here's a little little saint. He's not spoken to Epstein and well over a decade and has never been to Little Saint James Island Epstein's Ranch in New Mexico or his residence in Florida, not nor. So or means one of the three he hasn't been to. No, I know, but that's the way you can this is the fucking it depends on you what your dad, right? He is is he's the motherfucker that

went is is yeah, yeah, yeah. So that or nor slick willy willy slick will is oiling himself up for his biggest fucking. I mean, there's pictures of Bill Clinton with children or Jeffrey Epstein's plan. Yes. I feel like this will be my greatest challenge. Yeah, I feel like calling it Little Saint James is like a nice they probably thought that that was kind of a distraction from the fuck that from the fact that they were fucking little the patron saint of getting pussy from of raping children. They were trying to they were trying to say look up Little Saint James. Is he the patron saint of anything? Well, Saint James is probably no Little Saint James is probably a smaller version of him when he was a boy. No, man, I think it's a different saint.

There's saint. There's big James. Yeah, big James, big James. On line by Gawker also record. Mr. Clinton is being present on a domestic Miami to Westchester County airport. So he's like taking flights from Jeffrey's house in Miami back to Westchester. It's in the U. S. Virgin Islands. So you don't need a passport to go. Oh, nice. Dude, also on Google, it has one point three stars. Dude, what if it's just all the kids? They're like, they're like terrible time. Well, that's the other thing too is like people probably are leaving those negative reviews now. That's true. This will get there's only 66 reviews. Let's read. Love's is reading. Yes, see what we got. How do I read the reviews? There's an option. I'm clicking on it. It's not going

anywhere. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, Bill Clinton, definitely. So wait, does George is George so Obama was a gay prostitute? What about George Bush? Did he not fuck kids? I guess not. This is great. Additionally, New York Magazine reported in 2003 that Mr. Epstein once threw a dinner party at the House and Mr. Clinton's honor. Former president never showed, but the magazine reported that other guests included Mr. Trump, the magician David Blaine. Oh, it's Q and on people giving one star. Yeah, I figure it's not George. You need to check your facts because it was Bill Clinton that was there 23 times, not Trump. Please check your facts before you state something that as if it's a fact, that's fake news. I only gave it one star

because you have to order you have to in order to comment this place and then it needs an exorcism done. Nice. Big win for the Q guys. David Coke was down there too, right? Yeah, basically, they're all you know, they're all they're all it's so funny that people are leaving Google reviews of the child sex. Let's see what St. June the patron saying of fucking children. That's how we're going to crack it wide open. Yeah, well, it's it's he was the first boy not to snitch. That's true. I've been getting the same messages. It's so funny because like the people you attract by talking about this stuff, they're like, the next thing that's going to drop is a video of Hillary Clinton wearing a child's face. And it's like, what? No, let me stop you right there. Seriously.

Yeah, let me stop you right there. That's not going to happen. Because not going to be no, I mean, it's simple. It's like fucking Bill Clinton is like a horny piece of shit. Yeah, which now like 16 year old none of these people in power could like see this like this. This the Epstein thing only happens because it's the intersection of me to and then fucking Donald Trump becoming right. It's like everyone understood that people in power like raped basically forever. And that was like embraced as like that's just how it goes. You know, it's like behind closed doors, Bill Clinton is like shoving fucking interns into hotel rooms and biting their lips and fucking them. And they're like, that's just Bill, dude. Bill being Bill.

This is private. The same thing with fucking Harvey Weinstein or like any of these people. And then with, you know, with Clinton and a bunch of them, it extends to like, yeah, of course, you know, I got to taste for young, I got to taste for younger pussy. It's like David Bowie fuck the fucking 13 year old. I mean, it's like rock stars. Yeah, it's all of these like boomer pieces of shit that they want to be like Jimmy Page, 12 year old girlfriend. And they feel entitled to it. And now that it's like, you know, that's the worst thing in the world. They're like, oh, fuck. Yeah, you know, I mean, it's like almost on par with like them finding out that like cigarettes are bad. That's just, yeah, we're gonna we're gonna go have a weekend on Jeffrey's island.

Not even thinking about that. They're probably rationalized. It's like, you know, he pays the girl, the young girls that don't really have many options. And he's like paying them. It's better him than some pimp in the Bronx. Right. That's right. That's just like how they probably justified it to themselves. Damn. So is Epstein gonna get gotten prison, dude? Is he gonna hang himself? I mean, you know, I was saying to Tim Dillon, it's like, the funniest outcome is that they bring these new charges and they're like, six months supervised release. Yeah, he's guilty of it. Everything. Yeah, he's allowed to work during his what is his job? Who is a hedge fund? No, no, he just has sex with children. That's his job. I guess he paid people pay to have sex

with kids on this island. Is that is that we're probably so wait, we but he didn't have like a business or something. He's a bridge. He's it. No, he's a hedge fund manager. Damn. But no billionaires are squealing right now about who his clients were for obvious reasons. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, Merta. Dude, the code is snitching. I would lose respect for them. Honestly. Absolutely. I hate the police. They just tick me off. Jeffrey Epstein is about to snitch and then they bring in his his cousin from Israel. Like Godfather too. He's about to flip on everyone. Damn. Yeah. Well, so you got who was so do you think every president

has fuck children? Abraham Lincoln, Abraham Lincoln for sure. Well, yeah, I think people said that that he was a pedophile. No, people say he got his thighs fucked by his boy. Oh, well, Greek style Greek style. Yeah. That's just bonding in the Spielberg movie. There was like a weird scene with like boys where he was telling them like how much he cares about them and stuff. Damn. I thought the implication was that I think Tony Kushner wrote it. Is that why the occasion was he was a pedophile. Is that why his wife was so sad? Yeah, she went crazy. She couldn't compete with boy pussy 18th century boy or 19th century boy pussy. Well, he had to get away from her somehow. You know, yeah, too much. Yeah, I think crazy bitch. If you keep nagging me, I'm going to fuck

boys. Yeah, it's really her fault and Hillary's fault. George Washington. Did he put leeches on a little boy's ass? No, dude. George Washington was chill. He was he was he was really tall. He was a red. He was a redhead. He was a ginger. He was ginger. Yeah. Young George George Washington is kind of cute. Mm hmm. Always sees the old motherfucker past his prime. We don't see young buck G Dubb with that fucking with those red ass pubes just absolutely destroying Martha's pussy. Yeah. You think George Washington ever had doggy style sex? Oh, no, he didn't. But Jefferson invented Jefferson. They would all fuck that way. They would do it where they, you know, it's they'd stand like this. Oh, yeah, like he's crossing the Delaware.

Yeah, that's how you fuck the other time. Yeah, one foot up. No, no, it's like doing like a plie. Yes, yes, yes, by hand behind the back of a very masculine way. Yeah. And so far, I was saying to somebody else, it's like all those guys, I said, when I did that Matt and Shane thing, it's like all those guys just look like faggots. Yeah, just like the biggest like that. Like a big thing back then. The reason they would wear those socks is because having like, like nice calves was a thing. And they would go around and being like, you know, Charles, I do say your calves look like absolute dog shit. You're supposed to have alabaster calves, just nice, pure as the driven snow. Nice. Yeah. Like,

like, like, because you couldn't, you know, the calves are pretty much you're like genetically bound by limits. I did not hit the lottery myself. Yeah, I mean, you could do you could do calf work every fucking day of your life and maybe add like an inch and a half to your calf. I'm like millhouse in those future see a Simpsons episodes. Remember that see that time when millhouse gets ripped. Yeah, but he can't get calves. I'm trying to get big calves. I guess my question is when I was a thing back then for them, they dress like fags, but it's like any one of those dudes would fuck you up. Oh, yeah, dude. Well, they were schooled in hand to hand combat. Well, they did. Yeah, I mean, they like, they fought the crown. And like, yeah, no, that

was the point I made is like, you got somebody pissed you off. You'd be like, do you want to shoot each other? Fire a gun at you for 10 feet away. Damn. And they had little swords and shit, too. That's pretty cool. So I guess that's when do you think people started riding dick though? Like was more like again, was Martha Washington riding cock? Probably forever. There's nothing new that we're doing. Yeah, we haven't invented any new sex. There was a trans governor. That is true. He was right. She was hot. Yeah. Yeah. Victoria's cousin. Well, I'll tell you what they didn't have. What's that Nick? If your dick wouldn't get hard back then. Whoa. You were kind of you were shit out of luck. They could give you some some tinctures

and powders and shit. Yeah, but nothing would work. Do we are they back in the mix? What? Yeah, I think you're talking about. Oh, no, I just got another offer from a different screen. Well, well, well, our old friends are back to keep our cocks hard. Yeah, boot you dot com is a sponsor of come town both financially and Dick Pilsley. They send us dick pills. Oh, yeah, which get our dicks hard and make our heads hurt. Actually, they secretly started charging me for those pills. Yeah, the code stopped working and then they were sending them. Actually, we have a separate code as sponsors that we get. We get extra strength was that your cocks can't handle. Yeah. I'm blind in one eye from taking too many blue. Yeah, my joints lock up every time I fuck. I'm a good pirate

blue. Ah, me dick can't stay soft. I got a wooden peg. I would love a peg dick. A peg. It's like it's you get like three inches and then it's cut and there's a piece of wood. And then the rest of your dick and you could have attachments. Yeah, you could bitch. I'm going to give you the big boy tonight in front of the kitchen aid in front of the stand mixer. You're like, what's up? We're making spinach ravioli and it's finishing green. That would be awesome. That's the dream. But in the meantime, we have we're stuck with our natural dicks. And if that's going to be the case, you might as well plump them up to max hardness. Blue Chew has actually been working on making making those pills on the ones that make your cock wouldn't literally wouldn't the wooden penis.

They're the R&D department. Oh, yeah. Retarded and dark. Dork and retorted. You know what I'm saying? I may be a man. Oh, you retarded ass. Oh, he's from Oakland. But you know, no, I'm retarded and dark. I'm retarded and dark. I thought he was gonna be. It's the it's the R&D deporting. And it is for fellas. It's got a little extra something going on. You know, extra dig extra chrome is extra chrome. Extra chrome is a and we work extra to dad to fill in our system. I'm the retarded dark scientist from blue chew.com. Now I'm out here invent all current and new dick ass pills. But for now, we only got two products. That's right. Generic to dollar fill and sedan. So lead in the field, which is also the name of my cousin. So lead in the field. Get your ass back

in the lab. We got dick pills to make. Also known as generic Viagra and generic. But they chewable. Oh, yeah. So they're like candy. They work faster. They work faster because you chew them up. You don't have to wait for your gas stomach to digest it. Boo. That's that's digesting things later. No, thanks. Chewing things. But which is still good. Are you doing a meme? Yeah, I'm trying to think when it's not like the later man. I don't know. You know where it's like that woman see you and then this one's the new one. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I know. Yeah. Everyone knows that shit, man. That kind of stuff. Imagine like having the impulse to be like, I'm going to make a meme. And I know I've made things, but I've never thought to myself, I'm going to make a meme.

Well, you became a meme when you found that bird. You became a nerd ass meme. You were like, I'm like, oh, yeah, but that's not he can't control that. It's just getting like black heart emojis from fat girls on Instagram. Yeah, I'm a witch. I'm a witch and I can sense a spirit of witch of Wendy's. And I am like, sorry, I got to take my blue shoes. Sorry. Sorry. Just talking to you is making my cock. My dick is getting soft and small. It's retracting into my body. Yeah, I'm having a dick episode. I need my blue chew pills like an epi pen. Yeah, it's like quick as dick is getting too soft. That's one of the other things we be inventive. John Travolta fucking drives onto your fucking lawn and puts a blue chew in your mouth right before your

dick goes off. Vintage size in the epi pen, sexual. So if you want to keep your dick hard as a mother effort, sorry, there's a couple other things. It's easy. There's no fucking dumb ass doctor asking you bitch ass questions in person. It's actually just over the internet. Do not lie to them. Mm hmm. Yeah, no awkward doctor visits know something else. Yep, because if you go in discrete motherfucking package or discrete packaging custom medical some custom medicine group, custom medicine group. If you like sex, you'll like blue chew. Yeah, do you fucking losers like to fuck sex? I'm sorry, if you don't like sex, turn this fucking shit off, bitch. But if you do keep listening and buy them an actual doctor that prescribes them. This is a guy

who's who has just his life is gone. Oh, yeah, exactly the way he was in medical school. Just clicking on fucking button over and over again. Yes, he was like, I'm going to be saving people babies. Yeah, how about instead of blue chew, it's called doctors without boners. It's just the guys that work. Oh, yeah. Oh, yes, I'm pretty though. Yeah, here are doctors without boners. We prescribe dick pills to absolutely everyone in Africa. Everyone in Africa. For every boner you get, we make one a child in Africa. We get a child in Africa's dick hard here at blue chews doctors without boners program. The online consultation is free. So it's cheaper than the other two. They give you confidence in bed every time. But not outside of bed. You'll still

be a fucking loser. Yeah, that's your dick is going to get hard. But for that woman that's the fucking your your boss at at the sheets right behind your back. She's still going to keep fucking that guy. She will. But I will say after you do a thorough dickaroonie behind your back. I mean in the stock room while you're forced to watch the register and you can see them on the security camera. You can see dark. So chew it and do it, folks. Here's a great deal for you guys. Visit blue chew.com. Get your first order free when you use promo code come town C U M T O dot oh yeah. Just pay $5 shipping. That's blue chew.com promo code come town promo code come town. Let's fuck the show. Let's fuck my ass. Lewis had me on real life's podcast just to argue

with him about his stupid poker point about his what wait was it about poker. No, it was about he's about having tweeted he was like he's like if you don't have a kid a business and a friend named Dave your opinion is less valid on most issues. He's like wait on molestation on most issues. Oh, and then he says the stinger on it is if you don't have any chips on the table you're just somebody watching the game. Oh my god. Talking about poker. Which is probably bad. Anyways, yeah, but you know I was like to be fair I did misread his argument initially and I thought he was saying that if you don't have those things you shouldn't be commenting on things that affect those issues. You know like you don't have a kid you shouldn't be talking about a kid and it was

like well you wouldn't make this argument with a woman. You know a woman says there's sexism in comedy you wouldn't you know. Oh you would argue. Yeah, it's like well you have less you would argue you know and then and then I guess what he meant to say was that if you don't have those things then your opinion is less valid on any issue. Listen if you don't own property you can't vote bitch. Yeah. If you don't own property and have a child. Well it's such a simple thing it's like that Louisa doesn't make any sense. Yeah. You know that the second thing is to continue a Twitter argument. Theoretically yeah like basically any issue should be solved with like thoughts. Yeah. Right. That aren't dependent on like the underlying individuals. Right. It's just this is the best

course for things to take. So the stake of the people involved right bears no fucking weight on what the correct argument is. And he's like what are you talking about. I don't know how to make it any more basic. I really don't know how to make it any simpler. And then he's like all right I guess we could say the n-word for the last 20 minutes. Yeah. I guess we'll fill time by being racist then. He's like no business owners he's like I'll be you know he's like in the example like something came up later is that Disney refused to let some like dead father put Mickey Mouse on his son's headstone because it did like whoever like corporate at Disney was like I don't tarnish our image we don't want you know shit on a gravestone. And it's like you know I was like so

Louis you agree as the business owners of Disney that they had the right take because this man doesn't have a child anymore so he's out. Yeah. Yeah. Once he loses his child he's done. Oh that's a good point. If you're losing an argument with someone just kill their child. I'm sorry isn't your son dead. I just remembered I don't know the Sandy Hook guys. I mean shut the fuck up. I really hope nothing happens to Louis's kid. But if baby James ever dies I cannot. I cannot wait to go and realize podcasts. Well Louis you said hold on. You currently have your son is dead. So now your opinion is less valid on these issues. What a beautiful mind that guy has. It's amazing. Yeah. It really is amazing. Sometimes I'm just salute a hustle a hustler. Yeah. It's like he doesn't even really

understand what he's saying as he's saying which his arguments kind of reveal him to reveal themselves to him as he's saying them almost as if he's like playing a scratch off lottery. He's like no dude cucumber coconut and then I pair that with the five and that's how I win five. Oh I guess I don't win five dollars. Listen man I'm all for never thinking and just saying shit and figuring out you don't agree with yourself as it has. That's podcasting. That's podcasting baby. The second you make like a like poker analogies Kenny Rogers style analogies. That's really when you're trying to suck territory. No when to fuck them. Damn some fucking no limit hold them baby. Yeah. I'm fucking Doyle Brunson. I'm motherfucking Phil Ivy bitch. It's shitty to find out that I don't hate gambling

is also a problem for me now. Yeah. And I can't do that either. I just can't have fun because I have too much of it. I know. To the detriment of myself. You're so obsessed with fun. Yeah. You're like a band. I know I'm like that really honestly. Yes. Yes. Well that's why gaming is the only solution. Anything. Anything I touch. It's like I bought I was like I'm going to let myself get PlayStation and then a month later it's like I got the PS VR. Yeah. You know I burn myself out playing it for like five minutes and then I can't you know I just can't enjoy anything. Right. What games are there. There's a Batman game. Got to keep moving. That's the thing man. If I if I like if I had if I had Jeffrey Epstein money I would just be that kid from blank check which by the way

it was just a million dollars. Yeah. He bought way too much stuff. There's no way you get all that shit. Only gave him a million dollars. Wasn't the premise of that movie. You could just type like someone's name on a check. It starts off. It would be a valid legal tender. It's a check from his grandma for his birthday and they're like oh I guess grandma forgot to write the money amount on there because she's an old dumb bitch. I was like what does that mean. She's like he's like you just write him whatever you want and then he finds a blank check from the criminals. That's right. Played by George Clooney's cousin criminals doing white collar crimes. Who's that that guy like Miguel Miguel Clooney. No Miguel Clooney is Hispanic Martin. No but his cousin is

Oh yeah. He's fucking the Spanish side of Martinez. Yeah. Miguel Martinez. Is he as hot as Clooney. No. No. This is this is a politician. George Clooney's cousin. What's his fucking name. Now he's got like a Mexican name. Emilio Estevez. That is a weird because isn't it Rosemary Clooney related to them. Who's that. Probably. Yeah. Miguel Farrell Farrell Farrell Farrell Farrah Farrah Farrah Roche. No Farrah Farrah was born in Santa Monica, California. The oldest of five children of Academy Award winning actor Jose Farrah and singer Rosemary Clooney. Rosemary is his. His aunt aunt. Miguel Farrah is Rosemary Clooney. Damn Miguel Farrah really

did not live up to the fuck. George got all the good genes. Yeah. Even though I look at the two of them together. Oh damn. That's a rough genetic lottery. Right. Miguel Farrah has got a cool voice though. Does he. Yeah. What is it. Is it like a deep. We're going to we're going to fucking kill Robo cop. First we're going to have sex with Robo cop and then we kill him. Let's reboot blank check but he gets pussy from the lady. Yeah. What do you think. What lady was it like. He was a personal assistant or something. I don't know. He had a chauffeur that became his friend. I'm going to start that guy. I'm going to start doctoring check and then we're like a like a very obvious like disguise to the bank.

Clearly like prosthetics. You're just huge war nose fake nose and then like huge sunglasses and then like a mustache. It's like just over top of my regular and then you just hand them the check where everything's filled out but in the payment amount it just says gay sex. Hand it over to the male teller and be like I want to. And they're like I would like to excuse me. They're like what do you smell it. I'm sorry. I left my car running. I just run out. I just run out of the bank. Just start doing that all across the country. I'm still one of them has sex with you. The FBI has to like build a profile.

Catch me if you can. This guy trying to have gay sex with bank. They're calling him the world's best criminal. I don't know what happened. He handed me a check and by the next thing I knew I was giving him head. Could you just cash check please. Just please make it quick. I just I just what it says on there please. Look if this is going to be a problem I have to go outside to call the police myself. I'm good. I'm going you know what you keep that I'm leaving. Put your phone number on the back. We just have you change your mind. This is no this is a real check from business. Yeah I got it.

This is a paycheck from my business. It's just it's from a different bank. It's from a bank of America. Your boss gave it to me. It just says from this bank. No I don't know what you mean. I think it's everything's right right there. It seems to be in order. Let's go ahead and just get this check cash please. What's on that scenario. He doesn't even want the money. He just wants to have no money. There's no money. It just says. Don't just go ahead and get this transaction. In the letters part you write gay sex.

Do you also just write gay sex in the numbers part. Yes. Okay. Or just leave it blank. Okay. Just to check there's a big fake like Scrooge McDuck signature. A publisher's clearing house. And then when it doesn't work you come back a week later in the same disguise but with one of those giant novelty checks. You're like I got a different check. I won. Actually I've never been here before. What are you talking about. This is my I'm out from out of town. This is from a charity that I won.

I won gay sex in a church. There was a charity I won and now listen can we get this transaction. Yeah. Let's go ahead and dial this in. I don't know what needs to be done. Everybody on the fucking ground. You should start robbing banks that have gay sex. I'm not going to fucking say it again. That's they called it the town. It was a different part of Boston. Almost the exact opposite of South.

Over in Northy they was having gay sex in Northy. Back in the day we had the church. It's just another way of saying we had each other. The Knights of Columbus were true faggots. Put it on suits of armor and fucking each other in the A's. Real head givers. They'd roll in the banks and take whatever they wanted. Put in the gay sex behind the counter.

That's the thing that you don't realize. Okay. Cut. You know I like that the gay sex stuff that Jack. But if we could still lose the n-word. I don't want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to have gay sex with me. How does that song go? Give me a shawl, sir. Oh, give me a shawl.

Fuck me till I get age. I want to get fucked. Oh, fucking day. I want to suck your dick. I'm going to suck your dick. That's the thing straight people don't realize. It's not about waiting to have sex. It's about taking it when you want it.

I want to fill it up. Yep. The gay sex started. The gay fuck off. The gay ass fucked it. I wish I could remember more lines that hit us from that movie. From that monologue? Yes. There's other things in the movies.

Oh, yeah. I like the line where he says that. Don't the same microprocessor at one point. It's funny because it's like microprocessor. Microprocessor. Micropenis. I like the line where he's... You should just turn this into a Boston podcast.

The Boston Tea Party. From now on, it's a Boston podcast. We only talk about Boston. A podcast. Yeah, it's a podcast. Joe costs on IEV. I'm going to suck him. I'm going to fucking suck his cock.

You big poppy. I'm going to suck his cock. Get better David Ortiz. I'll suck your cock if it'll help you get better. I heard that the place where the bullet went into, he's letting guys come in there. Nah, I mean, you pay him enough money to let you fuck that hole. The man's a legend.

You know, they call him big poppy. I was always wondering, is that because he has a big penis? Not not. I mean, I was just wondering that. I'll take my question off the air. Thank you. I'll go ahead and I'll email it to him. And if he wants to email me back,

hey, I think that would be pretty cool on his part. He's, everyone says you're what a class act he is. Yeah, me, I'm from the town. You ever see that movie, The Town? Me and my friends were like that. And instead of robbing banks, we'd go around having gay sex. Where's your baseball plays? We wanted to blow Brady.

Tom Brady. I want to suck his cock. They love like talking about how much pussy he gets. Like a weird way that is a certain like the ladies. They love Tom. I know someone. I know a guy from Bosnia was like, if my girlfriend fucks Tom Brady,

she's got a, like he preemptively gives her a pass to fuck Tom Brady. She's never brought it up. She doesn't say what that she wants to fuck Tom Brady. It would be an honor to get his dick residue on my dick residue. Oh yeah. It would be an honor to be sitting in dockers in a hotel room and just watch Tom fuck my wife while I had a, while my I would love to be wearing sparrows top-siders

while Tom Brady comes in my fucking wife's hole. Dude, I'll cuck pornography is so funny. The outfits that they dress the cucks in. I'm going to, that's going to be my next career move, dude. It's to just be the cuck. Just sitting there with my arms folded being cuck. Those guys get paid. They're not their real girlfriends, are they?

They just play the. No. Are they supposed to, they don't even act upset really. They're like, oh, come on. Where I would draw the line is when they make you suck their dicks. Oh yeah. Thank you. I'm out on that. I'm not sucking the bull's dick.

I am absolutely not sucking the bull's dick. But I'll get close to her sucking his dick and frown. But I want her face to block me from. Oh yeah. Contact. Oh yeah. His cock. I'm horny.

I should get another cat. I want to have gay sex. Just poor cat. She seems horny. That's your next thing you're going to get obsessed with? What? Too many cats? No, just two.

So like the cat's not fucking bored all day long. I think we're getting a cat in Baltimore. I can't get another animal because my dog will eat it. Really? Because it's a murder animal. Will she kill a cat? But this poor cat. She'll kill a cat.

She hates cats. Whoa. She hates other dogs. She just needs so much attention. I'll be in my office and she'll just sit there staring at me for hours. Yeah. So is my, yeah, my dog's like that too. That's kind of like a dog.

Well, cats are nice because they like throughout the course of the day, they like have arguments and like disputes and then they resolve them. They have like a pretty rich social life with another cat. That's true. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

They're boys, dude. Yeah. When you have two cats, they fuck around. They get the claws out. They do a couple of swipes. Yeah. Yep. And then they're like, you know what?

Yeah. It was so fun. Let's give each other some space. Phyllis and Ernest would do that. They would just be sitting around. They would be having a nice day. And then occasionally you would just see Phyllis trapped in the bathroom and Ernest like hanging out at the threshold of the room.

And then going in there and hearing her like, you know, she would go in there and just fuck her up and come out and sit at the door and like, you know, he would torture her. So you want to catch and torture this cat? That's fucked up. Or vice versa. I don't know. She seems like an alpha to me.

They'll figure out their own. She's so cute though. Their own social order. Would you get cats like, no, she's been spayed so she can't get her pussy filled. Yeah. You also don't want to have like a non neutered boy cat because it will piss everywhere. Yeah, I got it. I told you, I have my old cat.

Fuck. My brother's better neutered that motherfucker. Yeah. Well, when they start blasting, there's like, you know, I don't know. Jit or piss. No, there's like, he was, he was fucking a pair of gym shorts of mine. I found him in my closet fucking a pair of basketball shorts. Oh, Tupac?

Tupac. I can't. I was a fucking bitch, dude. That guy was an asshole. Fuck him. He was cute though, but he was very cute. He can suck my fat whole. Yeah, very rude.

Very rude cat. He was a rude as shit, honestly. Took after his, uh, my ex girlfriend. Yeah, you, she always would just be yelling at me while I was like petting it backwards and getting riled up. You'd be drunk torturing the cat. He did suck though. To be fair, drinking out of a bottle of like Carlo Rossi.

Like that was the good shit. Not even with a cup. Carlo Rossi, dude. Oh, then the jugs. Just trying to, just scratching its stomach and it would lose its fucking mind. Yeah. And go nuts. Start biting and scratching.

He hits. Drunks. I couldn't feel anything. He'd just be laughing. Yeah. And you'd wake up the next day with scratches everywhere. And cut pieces. Bleeding on Adam's futon and shit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And fucking Joyce would be like, Nick, stop! It's like, what? The cat's already misbehaved. This is like a feral animal in your house. It had no manners. It also, it likes it. It enjoys that.

It enjoys combat. It likes to fuck me up. Absolutely. When you forcibly take a cat like that, put it on its back and start rubbing its stomach until it's screaming. That's what the cat wants. The cat loves that. Yeah.

Makes them feel like they're a tiger. Yeah, he did look like a tiger. Yeah, so. Battling it out with a gazelle or something. Yeah. Or maybe a gorilla. I imagine tigers do that. The gorillas pick up the tigers.

Oh, I would love to see a gorilla v tiger fight. Yeah. Do you remember that GameCube game? It was a primal fury. Oh, with the... It was a fighting game? Like Rampage sort of? No, it was a fighting game.

It was like Mortal Kombat. But when you like, if you fuck up the other guy enough, you get to turn into an animal. No. Well, they had in Mortal Kombat your animality. Dead animalities, yeah. Yeah. Oh, nice.

But yeah, maybe, I think it was primal fury. Striking vipers? Striking vipers. You have to have sex with the guy if you beat him. You get to fuck his girl Chinese. What's your animality? What's a very noble beast? How about a Black Mirror episode that's literally a Black Mirror,

right, where it's like a white person and his life just sucks and he doesn't understand why? And then every time he walks by a mirror, he's just a black guy. It's Black Mirror. So he thinks he's black and then he's like... When he thinks he's white or he thinks he's black? He thinks he's black because whenever he looks in a mirror,

he's black and people are like, you're not black. And he's like, what? What if I would he does this when he looks in his hand without the mirror? And then at the end, the reveal is he's Macklemore. OK. He's damn. That's a good one, dude.

The rapist Macklemore. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Suck Dicklemore. Oh, my dick. My penis can't get hard. My penis can't get hard. Yeah, I'm gay now.

I'm gay. My fucking dick is small. Just fuck my stuff. Fuck my ass. I've never had straight sex. Yeah. I also thought of another one. Everybody's working for the weekend.

Everybody's sucking on my penis. Lover boy. That's right. That's right. Everybody. I don't know the rest of the song. Everybody eats my fucking ass. Come on and fuck on my ass.

Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. I'm fucking gay, da, da, da, da, da, da, da. So yeah, that's something for you guys to think about if you're out there. Where are we at right now? Plugs? I want to go to jail this year for shining a laser pointer at an airplane or helicopter.

Yeah. That's still my favorite crime because you do it and then they can see your house. Oh, true. They track the laser like that. It's probably a really bad guy. The police show up and be like, uh, I'm sorry. My bad.

You should do it on a hang glider, bro. Yeah. That way they can't track you. You're a moving target. Oh, really cool. Yeah, I'm going to start fucking around with lasers. I should get a high powered laser. Now we're taught.

There it is. There's the new one. We found it. No more gambling. High powered laser. As long as you're off crypto, dude. As long as you're sober off of, uh, yeah. What about this t-shirt doing this t-shirt stuff has been great for me.

There you go. Got something to do every day. Processing orders, handling things when you give you a routine. You do let. Yeah. You have a love. I mean, it's more of a hate, hate relationship with the post office. But I tell you, man, packing those back because I got all the shirts packaged and you put like

50 shirts into a duffel bag in those packages. It makes me feel like a heroin. Yeah. Yeah. Little do they know you open that up. It's just the our real monsters guy with this cock with a nose for a cock. That's right. A cock for a nose.

That is correct. And an uncircled cocked for that. Yeah. Thank you for that. Well, anyways, we got some Canada dates coming up. We're going to be. Yeah, we're going back to Edmund and then we're flying directly to tune. Yeah.

We're doing Ottawa. We're doing the this time buy tickets for real tour in Ottawa. It's $72 for the standup show, the podcast. In a nursing home. Yeah. It's in an Olympic pool that we've drained. It's where they shot the movie Swin Fan, actually. Oh, no, I remember.

There's some hot shit in that. Yeah. How about a movie called Sperm Fan? Yes. Yes. The girl that's just like, I love drinking cum. Yep. It's like, Ben had everything in the world going for him.

He was getting his dicks up to buy a girl. But then it turned out he was crazy. Honestly, that is. For cum. That tracks, though. That's the movie. It's the same thing. He just, honestly, that's a pretty.

Yeah. Not even a horror movie. That's what a. If that girl is so hot, dude, I watched a trailer for that again. Is that not making Fox? I don't remember. No, it's not making Fox. It's something like dog face, bitch.

It's one of those. Oh, yeah. You know those like dog face girls that you know, just have like fat pussies. Yeah. Juicy. I would love to munch. Yeah. I would love to give that lady a little.

Yeah. Like it's a corn on the cob. Dog face girl. I know exactly who it is. Who you know has a family. Josh Hartnett. She has like nice eyes. He was the captain of the swim team.

Oh, yeah. Actually, it's a different bitch that I thought, but. He couldn't say no to that fat pussy. Yeah. She's sorted. Oh, yeah. She's sort of like Julia Styles. She got probably fucked by Julius.

Oh, she had big titties, too. She had huge. Erica Christensen. What would you do of a huge titted woman with a fat pussy? Let me just look up real quick for Erica Christensen. Breast. And she somehow framed you for using steroids to get you kicked off the swimming team. Oh, shit.

She got plastic surgery to make her titties even bigger. Blastic surgery where they use plastics. We do a thing called plastic surgery in which we put the woman under and I ejaculate into her breasts. Well, I got to say not a lot of news on the internet. A lot of fakes. Yeah. Erica Christensen stars as the fat pussy dog face bitch in sperm fan. I do like her face.

Oh, this. Yeah. I was damn. Yeah. Another fake. I got horny. But I saw the trailer for that. I didn't.

I forgot about it. Can't hardly wait. Remember that? Oh, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Completely forgot about it. Can't.

Seth Green is like the goggles guy. Yeah. Yeah. You remember in the 90s if like if you were in a teen movie and a crazy party animal, you would wear goggles on your forehead. Is that when they say the N word a bunch in cat hardly way? Yeah. Yeah.

That's what the movie's about is that they can't wait to say it. Can't wait to say the N word. Jennifer Love Hewitt. It's called can't hard our way. Personally, I'm waiting to say it. I'm waiting to say it for marriage. I watched Mystery Man again the other night. Good.

What classic. Good. Yeah. I've been I've been having a real like 1998 phase. Okay. It feels like probably seven million movies came out in 1998. It's like almost a lot of class. It's like every movie I've ever seen.

Does it 99 have some bangaroons? The Matrix fucking Dark City. Awesome powers. Now the first Austin Powers was like 97 six or seven. Yeah. Oh, right. Maybe the spy who shagged me is 99. I remember I got yelled at by my mom because I made my family go to the theater to see the spy who

shagged me. I remember when the first Austin Powers movie came out because it was before my parents got divorced and my parents were like, we're going to go to the movies together. And I was like, what? Yeah. I don't have to hang out with you anymore together. They were over. They were like, no, no, no. It was before they separated.

Oh, before we're trying to save it. This was like the one time they decided we're going to go on a date and what they did was go to see Austin Powers. That was the nail in the coffin did not work. All right. Well, I'm going to be in Southern California late August. Dates are coming soon. Oh, shit, baby.

Yeah. San Diego in LA. Headline. Your boy will be over here. Fat Stavi will be in Rochester, August 3rd. Breadlining. I will be breadlining in Rochester. So I'll be in Boston on the 16th and the 17th.

I'll be in Oakland on the 24th and I'll be in Seattle and Portland on the 29th and 30th. Stav and a breadline. And you know how like they do the thing with two midgets and a trench coat. Stav is the opposite thing where he paints seven different people on. He's like, oh, no, I'm seven different people. I'll be taking seven of the bread. I'm eight children. Yeah.

I'm eight. I'm actually eight different. Yeah. You just you go completely nude and you paint the trench coat open. Exposing a bunch of children stacked up on your legs and arms. Yeah, I'm not fat. I'm eight normal kids actually. So and then please come to the stand.

Come see us at Funny Moms every Monday. There's no Funny Moms this Monday because they have a pre scheduled event. But the next two Mondays of the month we are on. So the 15th we are off the 22nd and 29th. And come to the stand every Tuesday at 8 30 for Fat Tuesdays. I'll be doing a weekly show. See you guys.