The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - Ep. 202 – Joris Bohnson

Episode Date: April 9, 2020

Adam insists on using a girl computer so he lost his audio for the first part of this. You can watch the recording of the livestream on the patreon now, should have it up on youtube in a couple days when the video guy can put it all together.

Well. Here we are. Oh, here we are. Time to mute the chat, of course. All right. There we go. Beautiful. Yeah. Have you put it? Have you put a shirt on all week? Um, I put last time we recorded, I put a shirt on because I had my window open. I wanted to feel the cold. But now I'm back to I put a shirt on and then my nipple started hurting. Yeah. Did you see this story about the pandas finally having sex in the zoo? I did. And I got jealous. I know that makes that remind me of you. It literally reminded me myself of me, dude. Yeah. I was like, damn, I wish that was me. I wish I was a fat little fucking ball as something another little sexless type of bear. No, that's not what the fat thing having sex is why it

reminded me of me because that's kind of what I'm like a sexless Chinese bear. No, I'm not Chinese at all. I'm not even a little bit Chinese. You're Chinese. Can I tell you, you look a little Chinese. I'm got some Chinese aspects to you. Some Asiatic aspects to me. A little bit. Did I tell you where I went to popular jewelry? They literally were like, you're Chinese, right? They like wanted a picture with me because I was Chinese. Yeah, maybe you should have gone to loser jewelry. Why? That's not. No, I went to the right one. You and Adam should go to loser jewelry. Actually, I was at the right jewelry pretending to know how to skateboard jewelry. No, I'm not. I went to the right one. The lady was fucking Chinese.

Yeah. The lady thought you were Chinese. Yeah, that's how I started this story. Damn, I didn't know that you never told us that. Yeah, I went in there, it's owned by Chinese people. And she was like, so you're Chinese, right? And I was like, no, you're half Chinese. And I was like, no. Because I would describe you as Stavros with Chinese characteristics. Describe your ideology. With the same mustache, you look a little bit more Chinese. No, more Chinese. A little bit, a little bit. Is it just because I'm fat? Maybe. I think maybe the fat closes your eyes when I'm laughing. Little bit Chinese. There was a kid growing up great. He was fat as shit. He was his cheeks got fat only though. So he wasn't that but

they live so he did look like a like a Buddha statue almost. But yeah, it's funny. There's like, you know, people get so fat that they just get that fat face where they have like, you know, their nose starts getting swallowed by their cheeks. And then they got the same look and it's like those they're done. You know, I mean, unless TLC intervenes. Yes, it's over for you. Absolutely. Yeah. Although some people carry weight in their face. My boy George had a fat face long after not being fat. Yeah, I had a my face didn't like my face got like hollowed out when I was like 24. I think maybe 23. Prior to that, I had like a much, much like puffier face. Youthful. Yeah, energetic. I guess I guess you could

say that healthy. That's what that's what a fat face is. It's the sign of health. Is it? Yes. I don't know of extra of extra nutrients. Yes. They're not seeing people on your wife yet. I'm going to pretend I don't know what you mean. I don't have a wife. I don't know if we've said that publicly, but then we have and the ship is not my wife. It seems like your wife to me. And I don't know why the medical ship is not my wife. The USNS comfort is it's like, you know, how would I fuck the ship? Where would I put my car? No, you're in the living room and then it barges in to bring like snacks or dinner or whatever. Okay, you know, look, here she comes. Here's her just like you got were you doing your

podcast in there? Wow. That is cute. Yeah. Are you and your friends doing your podcast in there? She's coming around the corner. Yeah. Well, I'm off to this. I'm off to the supermarket to buy my husband more pork rinds. I don't like pork rinds that much. Well, I got to go get I got to get stuff for my husband. I had a pork rinds phase, but I'm past it now. I love pork rinds. Yeah. I'm past it to salt. Make me feel bad after the next day. Yeah. I mean, I just like the idea that you have a wife that requires a crew of 200 to maintain the hoser down. Well, no, it's just that that is part of the component within your wife is that there's hundreds of men that keep your wife running, you know, that

are required to make your meals. It requires a crew of hundreds of people. Yeah, hundreds of gay men wearing white. If you include like four girls with big tits that I can fuck sure and I'm on board with. Oh, yeah. It's how about this? It's the cast of Down Periscope. Great. Wait, what was Down Periscope? It's the Kelsey Green movie. Yes, yes. Yes, for sure. Okay. Yes, the boat is my wife. There we go. Now we're on board. Your initial, your initial disagreement was thinking that it was some rude criticism when really it's like, I just want the best for you. You want me to be pampered. It would be really cool to have that as your wife, bro. Yeah, it would be cool. You know what? I'm glad it's my wife.

We should see if Cuomo will let you get married to the ship. He probably has a crush on everyone has a crush on him, but his dumb Italian brain makes him have a crush on the big fat wife boat. Yeah, for sure. We're not seeing patients on the boat yet. I've been making love to the boat every night. And those are the facts. I can only tell you what the facts are because we're going based on science and facts. What's my name? Why is everybody like Cuomo? I don't exactly understand because he gets on TV and he's the guy that's here right now. I see on TV, you know, everybody's scared and horny and there's like a guy on TV that's not Trump. I get it. Well, I mean, it's like your options are Trump to Blasio or Cuomo. So yeah, you

know, go back and stop. Like that ancient riddle, you know, the guy goes to the wizard and he says, you know, I can either call you the N word, call you the K word or fuck you in your ass. Which one do you want? And the guy's like, I guess you can call me the K word that seems to be. Yeah, that's the one I would pick too. Yeah. And then, you know, the guy comes even her Mike, the guy comes running down the mountain, he goes into the village and he's like, the wizard called me a kite. And he's all happy about it. And they're like, what? That's bad. And he's like, no, but the other, you know, the other options are, I can't even repeat them. Yeah. You know, that classic ASOP, ASOP fable, gay, soft,

you know, if you had to fuck Mary kill Cuomo, Trump, the Blasio, I guess you fuck Trump. Why? Well, I guess you marry, well, I guess the Blasio seems like a good option with the whole thing. It's all bad. Cuomo, I don't want to be married to an Italian. Why? Because they're so faithful. They cheat, Trump cheats and rapes. The Blasio is probably a good husband. Yeah, he's German. He's not Italian. He just has an Italian name. So you get all the funny parts of an Italian with German stability, you know, base like Angela Merkel. Yeah. You know, that bitch could take a cock with his big cankles. So okay, you got that Merkel like getting fucked. Angela Merkel. And then. He's ice with that. I guess I fuck Trump for the

story to see what his cock looks like. Yeah. And I think you have to you have to whack Cuomo was that in terms. Yeah, he would understand. Yeah, his brother's hotter than him. His brother's what? hotter than him. Chris. Yeah, isn't Chris in a relationship with Don Lemon? They do they do two television shows in a row, which probably means Oh, I thought they were it's going down. I thought they were sexually involved with each other. Yeah, no, I think they are. Yeah, I remember reading that on Facebook a couple years back. That's the thing I remember. I remember reading about I heard the only time they have sex with a woman is when Rachel Maddow pegs them. Actually, I heard that on Facebook too. Probably down on the

same comment thread that you read. Yeah, you read. Yeah. And there's a spin off show called Maddow about you. Maddow about you. All right. Them and Wolf Blitzer. Yeah, he did. And Paul Reiser to Paul Reiser. Paul Reiser for sure. Yeah, I think I remember reading all that on Facebook. Yeah, that's a good show. Underrated. Yeah. The writing staff on Maddow about you is fucking Wow, they got all the guys from Fraser. Yeah, similar type of show. It's a bitch. That's the Tommy that Jewish guys could have wives. That was big for you. Jewish guys getting blonde wives. They could have a wife, a blonde annoying fucking blonde. That's six so what? Mm hmm. What does it mean? It means rape. It means prisoner. It means rape to

victim. It means smuggled in traffic. Oh, yes. Yeah. Is it because now is that because it sounds like Shaxuka and their pussies are spicy to the Jewish tongue? That's a spicy breakfast dish. It's a spicy meatball. Yes. Do they make spicy meatballs? That's a good question because most meatballs I've had are not spicy and the Italians never shut the fuck up about how spicy meatballs are and I've never had a spicy meatball in my entire life. Yeah, that's a great point. Yeah, I've had a spicy sausage. That's why and that's who they put in charge of this thing is some waffle that's gonna you know, all I can deal with is facts. Yeah, well, you can't even figure out whether your pasta is fucking piece

of shit. Yeah, dude. How about that? Here's my question. How do you become a reporter that gets asked questions in those briefings? I guess you go to school and then you go to fucking Northwestern, I think you got to work for news organization. Yeah, or your dad could be the governor, which is what Chris Cuomo did. And your brother could be the governor too. Yeah, you can be hot. Yeah, you can be fuckable. Yeah. I thought it was cool when a guy said, What do you say to the people that are scared right now? And Trump said, I say you're a terrible reporter. Yeah, he's been doing he's been doing that the whole time. Yeah, he got him. I'm struggling here because we have we have a read and I can't

find that's all right, bro. Well, I got to find the new copy and every time this fucking happens, but I find it and then I forget what I typed in. I also have four different email addresses. You got to consolidate brother, I should but you know, they kept little dick boy at Nick is gay.org is available. They kept getting mad at me. You know, it is available that I didn't buy it because I was too lazy to do it. I don't even want to say it. I don't want I'm not gonna say it because somebody else they'll say it. They'll take it before don't say it. Someone will do it while you're saying yeah, it's a good find. I'll hold on to that. Yeah, hold on to that. Anyway, I guess we should talk about how we're fucked

because Bernie's out. Yeah, I'm really sad. Shit sucks, dude. This really sucks. Well, there's also like a pandemic. So yeah, that too. We're going to get our asses fucked by type of the bunch of different stuff. I heard there's going to be hurricanes, dude. Yeah, from some guy again on Facebook. Yeah, I don't know actually if that's true or not. Bill Gates is inventing a machine to hide elite level pedophilia with hurricanes. Elite level. It's the hurricane it passes over and it goes over, you know, and then you get to the eye of the eye of the storm. It's a hot air balloon where you can rape children. Don Lemon and Chris Cuomo holding hands with each other going on a date. It's the house from up in

the eye of the storm. Yeah, just having gay sex and sex with children in there. Yeah. Damn, maybe I should rewatch up. Dude, unless you want to cry. I don't know, I probably I probably turned it off after 10 minutes. That's the part where you cry the beginning. It's sad as fuck. A little wife dies. Shit is fucked up, dude. Is it fucked up? Yeah, dude, it's sad. I don't remember any of the emotions of the movie. I just remember there was a house and the boy was Korean. Yes, he was a fat little Korean boy. Yeah, those are the two details of the movie that I recall. Dude, the first fucking like 11 minutes of up a real fucking tearjerker. Yeah, it is crazy how they're able to just do that and

like, you know, with no dialogue. Quick, dude. Yeah. Just because they draw that they draw that the things were so much a life in their eyes. Here we go. Okay. I got this shit now, fellas. All right. What are we going to do in 15 minutes or right now? No, we'll do it a lot of time. Okay, nice. How about are you on you? Do you have a stockpile? You're not even take you're not you have no reason to take the pills. Dude, that's the one thing my body you know how they're saying like nature is returning. My body is returning to nature with no dick pills, dude. Yeah. So you have a vagina now. Your penis is falling off. The cock is out. Dude, no more penis. My balls are shrunk with all the hair. My balls keep

getting fatter. My pubes have fallen off. My balls are shrunk. I can sing in a beautiful falsetto now. My hair is growing back. Look, my hair. My hairs are grown back. Look how beautiful my hairline is, dude. Look at this beautiful immaculate hair. You know, it's funny. It doesn't look like it's receded since you like cut it all off. I mean, it was that bad and fucking. Yeah. I think I just have this shitty hairline for the rest of my life. Yeah. Which is annoying. Look at this. It looks like a fucking arrow pointing to my penis. Does it? Yeah. Well, actually, it looks like a butt plug. Here's the little end. Here's the bigger end. I don't even see what you're talking about. Yeah, well, you need to fucking

open your eyes, pal. It's like I wish I was going balder because I want a bald ponytail, but I'm just going to have this hairy bullshit like fucking thin layer of hair to shave that part and then. Yes, that's it. Looks like Adam's out. Well, no big deal. Now's our chance to read his social security. This is awesome because now it's live stream. So we could just not do it. We'd be like, sorry, dude, it was the live stream. Yeah, sorry. We had to keep the show. The show must go on. Yeah. And actually, people really liked it. So I think we're just going to keep doing it. I think we're just going to keep going this way. Just to God, they didn't automatically cut him out of the picture. The computer program

hurt. Yeah. Initializing making the podcast better. Right. It'd be funny if there were if there were like, you know, like a lead tech pedophiles that were in control of everything, the plan, the virus, you know, whatever. This is all just contravence to but then they also listen to the podcast and they were like also not only do we fuck kids, but we're going to get Adam off the show. Adam's gone. I thought actually what might have happened is this program has like an auto detect feature that automatically, you know, removes white noise from the background. Yeah. And that's kind of fucking. So I have like, yeah, this story is from the movie cheaper by the dozen. This this is this is stolen from riff momentum

that riff momentum time to stop time to stop. Yeah, it sounds like there's an echo from two weeks ago. It sounds like like things that were said weeks ago, but are being repeated now. Trim that out. Yeah, it's like, yeah, it's like putting a filter. I'm glad that it's his computer that fucked up after all the shit I caught over my my beautiful mixing board. That's true, which the audience should know that issue has been resolved. That's yeah, I figured out how to mix out, you know, and so now we get that bad boy back in there. And I can hear it. I can hear myself. I can hear you hear myself is important for when I do voices. Absolutely. You know, like, no joke. Look how smooth this is running without

Adam, like even tech wise, he's beautiful. Right. He's texting me. Can you resend the link? It's in the fucking text thread, you dumbass. Yeah, it's also like, what am I supposed to do? Close this window, open I message. I'm supposed to close Safari, go all the way to I message. Come on, man. Manually podcast, while podcasting manually type out HTTP the whole link. I'm supposed to link. I'm supposed to look at the URL, memorize it. Right. You want me to write this down on a piece of paper? What the hell, man? And then take a picture of it and then upload it to you, upload it to your FTP so that you can go then you log in. Yep. And then look at I'm supposed to do all that. You want me to do those things.

That's the steps. Oh, sorry, guys. Hello, Adam. All right. Hey, sorry, my computer froze. Yeah, I'm back. Yeah. Nice, dude. I was just showing I did screen share and I was showing everybody quick books and how I can just have like, I got your W nine signed. Yeah, well, I was just showing them how cool it is to how quick books works. Well, I love good tips on books and stuff like that. For example, we'll go to we'll go to contractor Adam Friedland's page here and we'll take a look. You can see you got his address plugged in there and here's his social security number. Is he in? Yeah, for his corporation. Yeah, for my for my S corp. Cool. Well, you know, as long as everyone's still on the same page, everything

everything goes. Everything goes in through Israel corp dot LLC. Yeah. Well, yeah, well, it's I'm actually at my escort is a shell corporation for Lee Kud. I was a it's a pass through. You're paid through. Who's the guy that does power Rangers and hummus Chime Saban. Yeah, you're paid through the Saban corporation. You're an employee of Saban. Yes, I'm it's I'm a subsidiary of soda streaming. How about instead of an idiot Saban, it's an idiot Saban and he's like, I'm retarded, but I'm also Jewish. We're back. We're back. Idiot Saban and it's about that. Yeah. They're like, Oh, Charlie, Charlie, we have to go to Vegas. They're like, what's the problem with my brother? They're like, well, he's retarded, but he's

also Jewish. But he's Jewish. He's like, wait a minute, you're saying I can use him to make money. Definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely make the workers work. We're gonna, we're gonna, we're gonna make them come. We're gonna set up a bank, Charlie. Charlie, we're gonna set up a bank. Definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely gonna correct the rent. Definitely gonna correct the rent. Definitely, definitely, definitely gonna own a couple of properties. Yeah, your brother's an idiot Saban's mentally disabled, but he also inherited all of your dad's money. Definitely have to buy Clark and then sell them for 400% markup. Definitely gonna buy all the N95 masks. Definitely gonna almost got into a fight with

a guy in Costco parking lot. You almost lost a fight. You almost got your ass kicked. There's a guy Costco parking lot selling N95s for $50 a mask. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah. He was, I'll say this, uh, Filipino N95 seems like it would be like the name of like a racist sneaker. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like the Nike N95. Yeah, nothing flashy here. Don't even try me for my N95s. Yeah, it was good to see someone other than a Hasidic Jew trying to, you know, benefit from this horrific pandemic. Well, what are you talking about? Who they should have fucked up that. This guy, this guy in the, this, this Peanoy guy in the Costco parking lot that was selling N95s for, he's trying to flip N95s. He looked like he was

a car salesman. Actually, we're not even supposed to, we're not even supposed to wear them here anymore. You're supposed to make, they're supposed to go to the medical. You're supposed to donate them to a hospital. You're supposed to like make your own mask. Yeah. You're supposed to wear my mask these days. My roommates family in Texas found three random ones and mailed them to us. So am I not supposed to use that? No, you're supposed to make your own shit. And then you're supposed to give the, you should go drop those off at Elmhurst. Okay, I'll do that. Where's that? Oh, Elmhurst. I'm not trying to go over there. Why? It's dangerous, bro. Is it? I think so. I'm not leaving the house at all, bro. I'm scared.

You're scared of the virus. I'm scared of the virus. It's been nice. It's like Adam's gone again. I haven't checked in on, on, uh, oh yeah, he is frozen. Just stupid face. Looking at a man's penis. Just like not, it's funny because it's like, even if he were here, he'd have that look and he'd not be listening to a word that's been said. That's, this is actually perfect because this is exactly what we deal with all the time. I know. This is not listening, waiting to say something that's not a joke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I was thinking about getting into turtlenecks. They're like, Oh, okay. Would that be weird? Would that be weird if I had a turtleneck? God damn, dude. Yeah. Damn, I guess I won't

use the mask anymore. Yeah, you just got it. I was excited. Yeah, I want to get like a scream mask, scary clown mask. Oh yeah. Stormtrooper outfit. Bill, uh, Bill Clinton with his tongue out, Bill Clinton with his tongue out. That was a big mask. Remember like the, yes, late nineties, big Halloween mask. Yeah. Well, Spencer's gifts had that wall of like the, uh, the fancy Halloween mask. Yes. You would just look at it as a poor child to be like one day. Yeah, just like they, I'm going to be the clown with his, with a chainsaw mark halfway through. I don't think anyone was buying those because they were like $200 for a Halloween mask. They were for kids to ask their parents. You know what the function

was? You set, you want, you ask for a very expensive thing so that maybe it bumps you up. So you get a mid tier instead of a low tier one. Yeah. Cause you whine like, Oh, I want the $200 mask. Oh, was it the hat you think Adam that's doing it? Is that why you? No, I, I don't know. My computer keeps crashing. So great. I got it fucking 11 months ago. So yeah, I was lucky in that both of my parents are creatively inclined. So like the homemade costumes were very good. Oh, interesting. My mom, my mom, my mom sewed Sonic the hedgehog for me when I was like five. Hell yeah. And it was like, I mean, I guess maybe in retrospect, I didn't look like Sonic at all. It just looks like shit.

But as a child. Yeah. No, it had like the fucking the thing she likes. Oh, she did okay. She did the whole, I'm going to paint my face. And then my mom painted my, my only great face painter. And then I just wanted to be, yeah, I just wanted to be a, uh, the Grim Reaper every other year. So it's just hoodie and then a plastic scythe. I was Hercules. That was a big one because I was a big fan of the Kevin Sorbo, uh, Kevin Sorbo series. So I had the Kevin Sorbo Hercules. Dick Tracy. Dick Tracy. Look, Adam, this way it's just not meant to be. You might, you might have to sit this one out. All right. I'll just, I'll come, you know, I'll try my, I'll try. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we're, we're trying to, we're trying

to do a seasonal Halloween show. Nice topical Halloween show and ruining the vibes or trying to get people in the Halloween spirit pixelated like a grant, like a grand theft auto blow job. Like a, like a Japanese woman's vagina. Yes. Yeah. And the only porn worth jacking off to me. It'd be tight if you went over there and you took off a Japanese woman's pants and her ship was all just pixelated and you're like, whoa, for real? How? Awesome. And you put your dick inside and it felt like dial up. Yeah. It feels like, it feels like you need to go into the matrix for the first time. Yeah. You're jacking into the mainframe every Japanese woman's pussy. Um, that would all be awesome. Yeah. You know what's good

is gelt. The Jews should have hung everything on gelt, which I don't know if that coin, I don't know if it's so good for us to be doing candy money. Why? Because of the stereotype that we love coins and gold. Yeah. But then they make it, then you make it so everyone likes it. It's like, this is the kind of gold everyone, this is the kind of, this is why you're stupid is cause there's a thing, you know, like people are like, Oh, black people love fried chicken. They're like, okay, well, we'll open the best fried chicken restaurants. And then you have to go to Popeyes, Popeyes, which is owned by Jimmy Popeye. Jimmy Popeye. There is actually an Israeli chocolate restaurant in the middle of Manhattan, Max Brunner or

something. The fuck? Yeah. It's across the street from the AMC. I did not know that was Israeli. It's Israeli. I thought it was a chocolate restaurant. Stay woke. That's a chocolate restaurant. Are you going to have to break me? He's about to, he's about to cross the BDS Pigaline because it's a chocolate restaurant. Just you see the dust cloud. And I just come back and I just covered in chocolate like Sonic. That'd be cool. That would be fucking tight, dude. Cause I'm gay now. I've been, I've been listening to the new weekend album pretty good. Yeah. I tried listening to the new Nine Inch Nails album. It should just be called more of the same. I think I've only heard like the one about being an animal

or whatever. Yeah. Fuck you like an animal. Yeah. That's what I'm going to do. That guy does music. That guy does film scores now. Trent Reznor. Yeah. He did social network. Trent Reznor. Trent Reznor. Something. Brock Reznor. That's true. That's true. It's because he's lesbian. Yeah. Yeah, dude. He got to fuck Sabal. That's his wife. I didn't watch this Tiger King thing. In a lesbian way. What's that? Did you watch that? You guys ever jack off the wrestling? No. No, we've had this conversation too. Okay. I didn't watch Tiger King. I did watch it. It was pretty good. Yeah. What's it about? It's the guy that fucks Tigers. Yeah. I think he's gay. He has a little fuck of Tiger Zoo and he like

tricks like teenagers on meth to suck his cock. Basically, that's back on all feet. All these Netflix shows are now just like people on drugs. Yeah. Shut up, Adam. We're trying to do a song. Do the song. I'm sorry. It's the guy of the tiger and it's not making about me. It's not. It's a show about a gay guy. Now if you'll excuse me, Nick, we'll do a gay song. Why don't you go unplug your internet again? It wasn't the internet. It was my computer that crashed. Oh, why? Did you buy the cheapest computer? No, I did not buy it. So you're like, I have to do my job. Give me the cheapest. Just give me the cheapest computer. I have, it's a MacBook Pro. Yes, I, you know I have. No, you lied about. It's

been nothing. It's been a lot. Speaking of, if you're dick small and you'd like medicine. All right. If you think small like Adam and you would like some medicine to deal with it, there's a new company out there. There's no medicine for it. Oh, hell yeah. Do maternal comes today. Oh, nice. Oh, you're doing physical. Even, even in the face of a pandemic, you're not downloading. No, I never download the shit. I know, but now, which I don't know why because it doesn't really save you any. You can use it on different systems. I think it's the only difference. What? Downloading? No, if you do discs. Oh, you can use it on like PS5 when that comes out. I don't know. I just meant like a different place. I thought

it's, I thought that, I thought having the disc saved you some space, but I guess it doesn't at all. No, dude, it's so fucking bullshit. You fucking put a disc in and then it has to load for an hour. Yeah. Fuck that, dude. I'm pissed. Sometimes longer. Anyways, if you like, if you like having sex, you'll love blue chew.com. Oh yeah. Because if you like sex, you'll love their website. Dude. Oh, that's right. Their website. Please tell Nick to stop saying that it can work fast. Okay. Okay. That's part. Please tell the come town guys, not only they, they cannot say twice as fast at all. That's what I keep fucking on. Okay. That was the email. It doesn't, it doesn't work twice as fast. It does not

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because I fill up the dollars. That's good. Something like that. Yeah. Mm hmm. He filled a pimp named to Dahlafil. All my dollars are filled up. Filled up. It's like what? A pimp with erectile dysfunction. I got my dollars filled up. What does that mean? I don't mean you fill the dollar. My dollars is filled. What don't you understand? Anyways, chewables can work faster and the chewables from blue chew can be taken on a full or empty stomach. That's right, dude. You know, you've just had a quarter of a quart of cum. It doesn't matter. You drink a big old glass of con. You eat your blue chew and the online physician consult is free. You know, that's huge. So you get the, you can try it out on the physician.

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chew.com made in USA. They give you confidence in bed every time. So here's, here's a great deal for you guys. You visit blue chew.com and get your first order free. Wow. Can you imagine your first one completely free. Just pay the $5 for shipping. You got to use promo code come town C U M T O W N. That's blue chew.com promo code come town. Notes and ideas. Please use your own language and talk about your own experiences if you wish. We want men to know it's okay to need or want some help. It's not. Let's be clear. It's not. It's it's not okay. But guess what? Let's fuck. I'm ashamed every time I take a pill. Yeah. I think to myself, my body, I'm 31 years old. My cock should get hard. But listen, why even

think about what's okay? I don't care. I just think about it like drugs. Yep. You know, because then it's nice because it gives me the possibility to overdose on fucking, which is what fucking has been missing. That's why I could never develop any kind of sex addiction because there wasn't a chance that I'd have a heart attack. Well, guess what? Now. Now there are folks. Now you could have a brain aneurysm. Oh yeah, you take enough of those. You'll get a real headache. Yeah. I've been there, brother. You want to talk about our experience? Let's be clear. You've never been there. 30 seconds ago. My ears have gotten the hot. What? Listen. Yeah. No, stop. It's not. No, stop. No, put me back on. Put me

back. Okay. Damn, I love that. That is awesome. It is cool. I wonder if there's a way where I can give you executive privileges. That would be nice. Damn me. No, no, no. You know, now I kind of want to rewatch executive privileges. What's that about? Executive decision. You know, it's a different movie. It's a better one. It's got JT Walsh. And Alec Baldwin. And Bill, Bill Pullman. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Bill Pullman, JT Walsh. Classic boss guys. Yeah. The executive permission or whatever. And whatever I said the first time. 1997 executive permission. Yeah. That's what movies are good based on Baldwin teaching Bill Pullman. He can read based on the Clive Clancy novel executive permission by Clive Clancy. Clive Clancy is

good Tom Clancy's gay brother. Yeah. Permission to speak freely, sir. That's that line precedes every other line in the movie. Someone needs to wake up the president. It's like 3am. Sir, you need to take a look at this. The president's somebody. It's my penis. Somebody needs to get permission from the president to see this. You don't have the executive permission, son. Son. Son. You ain't got the executive permission to make your penis. You don't have it. I'm a four star general. And I'm mad in the movie. And I'm not looking at your penis. And I'm upset the whole time. The whole movie. The whole movie. I'm pissed off. He just wants to fire the nukes. Let me take these Arabs back to the Stone Ages and know I will not

look at your penis. Yeah. And then there's like some bitch that wears shoulder pads. You know, and she's like, remember when we had sex at Harvard? Remember when we used to fuck in politics college? Oh, yeah, dude. Yeah. Yeah, those were different times. Those different times you fucking whore. Yeah, we can't, we were just kids. And now it's executive. Now it's a whole world of commission. There's like 400 movies that are just. Somebody's stolen five to 99. Yeah, the vice president slipped on a banana and died and nobody knows where he is. The public doesn't know, but they've replaced the vice president with a clone. Russian ultra nationalists have replaced the vice president with a clone. That's a good

ass movie right there. Yeah. So I'll watch that honestly. You know what I watched recently? Was a big trouble little China. Yeah. Oh yeah. That's a good ass movie, dude. You like it because it has magic, right? I love magic. I haven't seen it since I was a kid. It's good. You should watch it. Have you seen showdown in a little Tokyo? No. It's a very funny movie. Not even the same movie. No, it's a different movie. It's Brandon Lee and Dolph Lundgren. Are you sure that's not the same movie? It's Brandon Lee and Dolph Lundgren. And they play like Asian task force police on the LAPD. Yeah, so like the LAPD has like a section just for dealing with Asian crime. Yeah. But there's all this like, I mean the

movie is hilarious, but they get some Yakuza guy and he's in and like Dolph Lundgren knows everything about the Asian gangs or whatever. So there's like a Yakuza guy in like the interrogation box and he's left for alone for a second and Dolph Lundgren sees the guy by himself and he's like, shit. You know, and he starts running in the room. They're like, what? What is it? You know, and the guy just takes his own head and breaks his own neck while being like voluntarily detained. Yeah. Just question about something. That fucking rocks, dude. Yeah. Damn showdown in little Tokyo. That's awesome that they just named a movie that. Yeah. I watched showgirl China. I watched showgirls yesterday. I don't think you did. Yes, I did. And you know what?

It's funny that you've been watching Barney every day. No, I haven't been watching any baby stuff. You've been watching. I'm pretty sure you didn't watch. Every day it's been nothing but Barney. Well, I've been in time out a lot. Yeah. You watch. You've been here. You've watched show guys. Yeah. I don't know. No, I didn't watch show guys. Show boys. That's not a movie. It is. I just checked. It actually is. It's funny how. Hold on. Hold on. Yeah, I just checked it is. What was that sound? It was a computer. It was a computer. That was a typewriter. It was a computer. I was checking. All right. And it is. And actually I'm looking. Hold on. Enhance. Enhance. Adam Friedland just watched it according to Netflix.

I just checked into Netflix. The data's in there. The data's already locked in. The president's going to want to know about this. I got into the back end through a back door, through an HTML channel. Mr. President, requesting permission. We're requesting permission to prove that. Adam Friedland, watch show girls. Show guys. Show guys. God damn it, son. You got to ask me before you go to the president about this. This isn't an executive permission situation. Defcon five. Defcon. We're moving to Defcon Norad. Oh my God. We're moving to Defcon 17. We're at watch level alpha. Yes, we are. No, they have the president hostage and the vice president is a Glenn Close type white bitch. Come on, Nick. Come on. Okay.

The president is a Glenn Close type. White bitch and they got to get the president back otherwise. There's going to be a white woman, the first white woman president. Okay. And it stars us and we got to save the president. Glenn Close is the white, but I thought you said she is the president. She's the vice president. They have like a short haircut, white, like kind of lesbian, late 80s lesbian mom looking vice president. Yeah. And unless we do something, there's going to be a white woman in charge. Unless we save the, yeah, that's right. Yeah, that's actually pretty good. That's got legs. Thank you. Thank you. Because we don't want that. That was that's the last thing. That's the last thing. If

only president's going to want to get fucked in his ass. Sir, we did some studies at the museum and it seems somebody fucked you in your ass while you were asleep. We asked her we looked through and went to the museum. Yeah. The museum. What's your name, son? It's Indiana Jones. Yeah, it seems somebody sucked your dick while you were asleep. It says it right here in this ancient scroll. Nazis. Suck you off while you. They call you and they suck you off. That that that that that that that that just a picture. It's just like the bunch of Nazi suckers. Anybody want to tell me why Dr. Jones here is the first person to let me know I

got fucked in my ass while I was asleep? Is the cabinet's just silent? What I pay you people for. That that that I just whipping the Nazis away from the president's cock. It turns out the cabinet was in on it, dude. Yeah. George Lucas and like the DVD commentary just being like, yeah, well, at this point, I had completely run out of ideas. But I was intrigued by the possibility of making even more money. So I considered a sort of a collaboration with Aaron Sorkin and Tom Clancy. I love that. It just shifts tones completely for like nine minutes. Yeah. And it's an Indiana

Jones movie. Who the hell is this guy? Dude, I was I was looking like Boris Johnson was going to die there for a little bit. That would have been awesome. That would have been so funny. That would have been the funniest bit of all time. He would get it got. He would be the the greatest, the greatest of all time forever. Best bit better. Nothing Andy. Everyone talks about Andy Kaufman being doing the best bits. No, Boris Johnson dying

of Corona after publicly bragging about going around hospitals, shaking hands with people with Corona. He's like, I just shook that hat and still didn't matter. You think he's dead and they cloned him? Yeah. So they don't have that technology in England. Somebody's calling the Queen of England. The mayor, but with a smaller tire policy, the mayor of the mayor, we got the CIA to come in and explain who the president of England is. I can never keep it straight. Which one

do they got a president over there? Yeah, Alec Baldwin is confused about that. Now, slow down. You're telling me they got a queen over there? Have you seen Executive Decision? No. Yeah. I might watch it again. I've seen it. It's very funny.

I've seen it 19 times and I have no idea what the movie's about. It's just scene after scene in the Oval Office and just fucking... I mean, at one point, they really do go... I forget which actor it is. Len Carey. Maybe that's his... I can't remember, but he's looking at it like a table of generals or something and he's like, get the president on the phone. It's an Executive Decision now. Right, yeah. It's an Executive Decision now. The name of the movie. Yeah.

I love when they do that shit. It's very funny. Yeah. I haven't seen that. I watched a couple John Carpenter type things, got big trouble and then I watched Escape from New York. That was fucking awesome. Escape from New York. Hell yeah. I watched that on 9-11 last year. The sequel is dog shit. Yeah.

I watched that together and I was confused. I was like, because when Escape from New York was awesome, I was like, why did the sequel suck dick? Uh-huh. But the sequel was just corny, but the first one was awesome. The first one rules, dude. Shots out to Ernest Borgnein, dude. Yeah. It was a little toothy grin.

Christine is the best John Carpenter movie. Is there a lady with big ass tits in it? No. Because Escape from New York has that one lady. Yeah. Her tits are awesome. Christine's good if you want to have sex with cars. I don't, unfortunately.

Damn. What's Christine about? It's about a big dog. Yeah. It's about a big dog. A big red dog. No, no, no, no, no. There's like a horror movie that's about a big dog. Well, there's a movie called White Dog that I saw. Is that a Samuel Fuller movie, White Dog? Yeah. It's a late Fuller movie, like 80s.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the... The best. Stop. You're thinking of Sandlot. No. Yeah. You're thinking of Hercules. There's one where there's a big ass dog that's terrorizing people. Yeah. Let's list the movies you've seen. Hercules. That's one.

Finding Nemo. Sandlot. Finding Nemo. I have seen those three, yes. Aladdin. John Wick's... I have seen Aladdin. John Wick 2 and 3. I've seen the first one.

I love that one. Favorite. Out of all those three. These are weapons 1 through 3. 30 minutes of one of the Jurassic Park movies. That's pretty accurate. Yeah. I have not seen the Jurassic Park.

Oh, you know what? I saw the one with Chris Pratt. I saw all of that one. You thought you saw Arrival, but it was just Inception? What? I haven't seen Princess Bride. Stop is seeing Princess Bride. Hell yeah, of course. Pretty good. Shut the fuck up, of course, bitch.

That's the kind of movie. I'm sorry I don't go to www.whatmoviesarefuckingsmart and will make people think I'm cultured.com. Yes. And fucking look at every fucking one on the list. That's not a website. And struggle through them and pretend I'm enjoying them. It's true.

I'm watching shit I like. Not some fucking... That's not a website. Hold on. The problem here is like, stop, you also haven't seen 98% of the shit that you would like. Yeah, that's true. So the criticism is that you can say, oh, I only watch movies that I enjoy.

It's like, no, you watch nothing. There's a million movies you think... Have you seen French Connection? No. You would love it. You would love French Connection. I'll watch French Connection. You should watch it this afternoon.

Fuck. I might. Maybe we'll do like a Twitch or a Zoom or something and rewatch French Connection. I'll watch French Connection. You know what? You should get into like a 70's urban crime thing. That sounds good.

I really want to watch it as long as Friday. French Connection, Long Good Friday, Day the Jackal. But I can't find it on Amazon. Day the Jackal, Secret Partner, I think. It's an Altman movie with Elliot Gould where he's like, works at a bank and then he gets roped into this bank robbery.

That movie rocks. Long Goodbye, you should watch also. It's where it starts, stops at it and then I reiterated that it was good that he said it and now you're suggesting that he watches. You didn't listen. Wait, the Long Goodbye? Oh, not the Long Goodbye.

Long Good Friday. Long Good Friday. No, the Long Goodbye. The Long Goodbye. I said 70's Altman and Elliot Gould. The Long Goodbye is not my favorite. It's not that genre. Well, no, I mean it is, but I don't like it.

I mean, everybody likes it. It's a neo noir. The problem with movies from the 70's is that they're too fucking slow. Not a lot of shit happens. No, it's not a tight 90. You ever see that? You ever see that? What is it? The Peter Boyle movie where he plays the,

he's like a guy that goes like crazy and kills a bunch. It's like in the same vein as like Death Wish. It's like Crazy Joe or something. I don't know. Here, let me see. The Dad from Raymond? Yeah. I'm going to watch a bunch of John Carpenter movies now though

because there's a movie about a big ass dog though. I swear to God. Beethoven. No, it's like a horror movie, god damn it. What's Christine about? It's a car? Is there a movie with someone hiding from a dog in a car? Crazy, Crazy Joe.

Okay. That's another one. Mean Streets. Mean Streets I haven't seen since I was like 15. I fuck with Mean Streets. I like that. I don't know if that's good. Still, is it?

It's good in terms of like, you get to just watch Young De Niro. You can see how it all started. You watch your boys that you love figuring it out. And seeing Marty figure out how to use songs and scenes. And Marty's in it. I think he shoots someone or gets shot. I love when he's in movies.

I love taxi drivers, so sick. Yeah, what are other movies you should watch? Yeah, but there's two or three that I'm missing. I like Revenge. I like Guns. There are 70s urban crime movies. I mean, you should watch all the Death Wish movies. Death Wish movies.

Yeah, I've seen Death Wish movies. What the fuck? There's something... Hey, let me see your penis. There's something I'm missing that's like, I know is like... Yeah, I don't know. How about just French... You should watch...

French Connection and Day of the Jackal for sure, though. You should watch... In the chat, a bunch of people are saying a bunch of movies and we'll never know what they are. What do you mean? Oh, yeah, they're probably freaking out. They're going crazy listening to Death Wish movies. We'll never know what they are, bitch.

Stop, I watch this... Stop, I watch this movie. I texted you right about it. St. Jackets on Amazon. It's... Ben-Gazzara is a pimp in Singapore. Linda Tripp died. Oh, hell yeah.

She did? Take that, you fucking snitch. Mm-hmm. Lioness bitch. Rot in hell, you fucking whore. T-Monica, bro. She's been reincarnated as the boat that stops Meredith. No, then I'm out.

Then it's not my wife anymore. I want a divorce from the boat. Yeah. Here I am. I'm docking in the harbour to... She's one of the most busted bitches in the world. I'm docking in the harbour to save everybody with code. And we know what she's busted from her heart.

What? She's a dumb bitch. She's ugly from the inside out. From the inside out, bro. She ruined a 20-year-old girl's life. Yes, sir. And you know, in hindsight, she was the upper limit of what Bill Clinton wanted to fuck. Because he fucked kids.

Yeah, Bill Clinton fucked some dogs. Mm-hmm. That's the funniest part about his shit is that he's going around raping and, like, cheating on his wife with just absolute threes and fours. He loved... Yeah. Yeah, he... You're the president.

Yeah. Imagine. He's a rapist, bro. Kennedy fucked Marilyn Monroe. No, it was probably... he was probably, like, just the going wild fucking kids, you know? And they're like, Bill, we need some cover for this. You're going to have to fuck a couple of adults. I guess I'll just pretend to be into trash pussy.

You can't even tell who's a hot adult because he loves it. I'm going to pretend to be into trash pussy. My cover's going to be that I love that I can't stop raping the trashest pussy I've ever seen. Hillary, I'm sorry. But I'm just addicted to trash pussy, wink, wink. I know that, Bill. Yeah. Fucking bitch.

Damn, dude. Yeah, French connection's good. You know what you should also watch is... But I've been meaning to re-watch this. You ever see The Last Detail? All those, like, early 70s Jack Nicholson movies are great. With the exception of Easy Rider, which sucks. I want to watch... Yeah, remember, Nick, we tried to watch...

Me and Adam tried watching Easy Rider, and it's fucking awful. It's so bad. It's fucking... I believe that. It's dog shit. It's really bad. It's such... The only cool part is that Phil Spector has that weird cameo as a drug dealer at the airport.

But besides that, it sucks. What did Phil Spector do? He killed and raped also? He did. He killed... He killed... Yeah, he started living an all nocturnal life in a castle all alone. He went crazy and he killed... I think it was just a waitress or something.

I don't know. For real? Yeah. King of Marvin Gardens, Carnivores. I have that box set. Five easy pieces. Last detail. Yeah.

Five easy penis. Yeah, five easy penis. Last detail. I guess you could throw Terms of Endearment in there. You would love Terms of Endearment and the shining scene. What's that about? Terms of Endearment... It's about breast cancer.

Yeah, it's like a very... I don't want that. Fuck that, dude. It's about breast cancer. Yo, I don't want to see a single movie where titties are under assault. You know what I'm saying? It's too sad, dude. It's too sad.

Terms of Endearment is a great movie, dude. I know. If you like up, you'll love Terms of Endearment. No. Terms of Endearment is up for adults. I don't want that. I want up for children. That's what your dick does.

That's what your dick does. Nine minutes of being sad. That's what your dick does. Up for children. Yeah. That's good. That's good. Thank you.

Knock that one out of the park without even really force on a check swing. Yep. Fuck. Yeah. I want to watch more junk. I want to watch The Thing next, probably. Yeah, The Thing. You know what?

I said Christine's the best carpenter movie, and I probably, The Thing, is the best John Carpenter movie. Yeah. But I swear to God, there is. So what's Christine about? You're in a car. Some guy's in a haunted car. All right.

It's like a high school kid, and he's a loser, and then the actor looks exactly like Sean Gabbard, by the way. Oh, that's weird. Which is weird. And especially old Sean Gabbard, the one we met like 15 years ago. Fuck. Damn. Oh, shit.

You know what? I'll be right back. You guys talk. My deliveries are here. Oh, yeah, dude. Respect. I wonder what Nick's getting. I wonder how many baby dick condoms only to be used for gay sex he got.

Did you see that guy at the Amazon warehouse being like, a dildo is not an essential item? That guy rocked. That guy rules. Yeah. That guy should replace Bernie as the leading voice of the left. I would vote for him. I would vote for him before AOC. Oh, yeah.

Before AOC. Yeah. I don't know. Oh, that's your Congresswoman. That's my girl, dude. Yeah. That's Queens, dude. Well, I just, I'm just pissed at her because she stopped campaigning for Bernie because

Joe Rogan endorsed him. Is that true? Yeah. It's the weakest shit I've ever heard. That sucks, dude. Fuck her, dude. That's fucking little dickery.com if you ask me. Joe Rogan is like a, I think, you know, on, on, on the whole, a pretty good person.

Rogan rocks. Yeah. I think he's a good guy. Yeah. He's got dumb ass friends, but he's a chill bro. He's a chill bloke. Who are you talking about? Chill ass bloke.

Arthur. Arthur Morgan. Brother of the pod, Joe Rogan. Oh. From Joe Rogan experience. Yeah. He's voting for Trump. I guess we're all going to vote for Trump now like Joe Rogan.

Yeah. If Joe Rogan tells me to do it, I'm going to do it. I'm wearing my hat, dude. Voting for Trump. The bad guy, the black hat. Black hat. That's, this is the new me now. I'm going to, I'm going to vote in, I'm going to vote for Ralph Nader, dude.

Old school. Is he dead? Is he alive? Yeah. He's alive, dude. He's kicking. That's good for him, dude. I feel like he's been old as shit forever.

He invented. What's going on in the minds of like Democrats? Like, do they think that Joe Biden is going to become president? I think that they actually think that that's going to happen. The way they thought impeachment was going to work, they think this shit's going to work. They think it's just, it's going to be easy. Yeah. The hubris.

The absolute hubris. But I mean, like, dude. The motherfucker can't even talk. I know. He can't talk, bro. They got his wife holding his fucking hand when he's on doing live streams. She's probably telling him what to say with Morse code or some fucking shit. Yeah.

He's fucking brain as mush. Trump is going to wash him at the debate. Yeah. And he's going to call him a rapist. That's going to be so funny. Honestly, that's the only silver lining. Trump is going to call him a rapist. Yeah.

He won't call him one back. No one will mention that Trump is raped. The only silver lining is the debate. I'm already like fast forward. I'm already fast forwarding to like 2024 when Democrats are like, there's a term limit. He can't be president again. And then it's like, then it's 2027. And it's like, no, we're going to do it.

We're going to get those term limits removed or put back in place. They promised us if we supported this Congress, this constitutional amendment that they would give us a ceremonial statue for John McCain. Right. And I think that's fair. That was a fair trade off. And we're going to win the fairway this time. Yeah.

We're fucked, dude. We're absolutely fucked. No. We passed a law that said that any black people that make less than $20,000 a year are legally allowed to be sold back into slavery to work directly for Jeff Bezos. And in exchange, they renamed the post office after the first trans woman to go to jail for rape. And that's, that's what the Democratic Party, she was a trailblazer.

It's a fair trade. It's a fair trade. That's called the, it's called, I would love to see, go ahead. Sorry. No, it's all right. It's over. What would you love to see? Sorry.

I would do that. I feel bad because you, you had the button on that and I'm just going to say fat, a factual, not funny thing. But it would be funny to see if like any of these pundits will, if Trump literally tries to have a third term, if they'll be, if they'll try and stop it at all, or if they'll just be like, gosh, no, they'll say, they'll like, they'll cry about it, but it doesn't mean anything. It's graceful.

Yeah, dude. It's, this is going to, this is fucking, I mean, it's yet to be seen how long this thing goes on. Rona. Yeah. Right. I think the public opinion is turning on the government response and it has to. Yeah.

What do you mean, apparently the government knew about it in November and they didn't do shit. Well, you know, I don't know. I mean, all the people that are saying Trump was polling at like 65% approval rating for how he's handled the crisis when that 1200 was supposed to drop in direct deposit. And then everybody realized it's like tax credit or some shit. No, we get, it's taxed the 1200. Yeah.

Hilarious. Where's my 12 dude? I'm trying to get one of, I'm going to get one of those small business loans for PlayStation five. Yeah. Fuck yeah, dude. Let's get a car. When does PlayStation five drop?

PlayStation five. I'm going to use it for hair plugs. My business is my appearance, dude. I'm an entertainer. That's true. Small business loan for hair plugs and a cock extension surgery. Yeah. I'm going to, I'm going to invest in some non-disclosure agreements that I should have

that side a long time ago. That's good, man. You should have those fucking ready to go. Yep. By DMing, Adam Friedland, you agree to never tell anyone anything. It should be an auto vote. Oh, you should have it. You should have it incorporated to your website.

Yeah. It just like an auto reply to every email, even like business emails. I thought I was going to be done with the pot. But I got an email from a soap company, see if I wanted to be an influencer. I was like, oh, it'd be funny if there was just a 100,000, they offered 10 bars of soap for three swipe up Instagram stories. It'd be funny if there was like soap companies and like candle companies and lampshade companies now.

They're like, well, the world's ending. They're like, let's get ahead of the game and just contact Jews and see if they want to be sold into soap. We'll give you $20,000 you get a year. You have a year, $20,000 up front, you have a year before we holocaust you and turn you into soap. You're going to be holocausted anyways. Most likely.

The world is going to end. So it would be funny to see, just try that. Just email them. Give them the option. They're like, odds are there's going to be another holocaust, right? We're just reading the solution. Within the next three or four years. So we'll give you the option now to be holocausted by us for a cash advance and exchange.

We get to be the ones to genocide you. That's not a deal that you take and turn you into a lampshade. That's a deal that you make. What? That's a Jew that owns that company too. A Jew definitely owns a company for sure. Yes. Yes.

100%. Yeah. Definitely a great idea, Ray. We're going to off. We're going to genocide. We're definitely going to sell. Definitely. We're going to sign up.

Definitely. We're going to do a holocaust for money. Definitely. Ray, are you telling me you're selling out your fellow Jews and retards as a business idea? That's the plan. That's the plan, Charlie. That's the plan.

That's definitely the plan, Charlie. What's his name? Saban some. Yeah. I am. The touch of Saban. I am Saban. No, no, no.

What's the character? I think his name is Rayman, but he's an idiot Saban. Oh an idiot Saban, that's right. I was trying to remember. Damn, today, baby, Wednesday, Wingnight. You're getting wings. Oh, you have fun little theme nights at the house? It's the only thing that marks the passage of time Wednesday is when there's going to

the boys. So when you have food that's bad for you? Weird. Yeah. Well, we have to support local business. I mean, wait, wait, wait, Wingstop with business. Pass over, boys. Wingstop, that's true.

Wingstop's disgusting. No, Wingstop's good, dude. It used to be good, but maybe, you know what, it's probably another case of, like, going to fast food. New York City? Yeah. Yeah. New York City fast food always takes a dive, for sure.

Yeah. Although the winning Queens is pretty good. Wingstop and Queens? The one by me, but I'm not going to Wingstop, I'm going to a local bar to support local business. Oh, you're going out, you're leaving. You're breaking quarantine to go to a bar? I will not be, we will be, delivery, we will be, but we will be supporting local business.

Damn, I would love some wings. Yeah. I've been dieting pretty hard. Oh, I am going to die after this. Yeah. This is crazy, because I'm like doing home workouts, so I have to do, like, more kind of like cardio oriented shit rather than just lifting weights. Yeah.

And it's crazy how fucking out of shape you can get. Oh, dude, I'm going to die. It comes back, but I'm just like, this shit is kicking my ass. I fucking work out for like 30 minutes a day, I get my heart rate pretty high, but afterwards it's like my eyes are throbbing and I have to throw up. Yeah. I've been doing yoga every morning and just like stretching, I'm breathing heavily, dude. Yeah.

Just like getting into a real stance and just like fucking putting all the weight in the leg and shit. Yeah. I was, I can't believe the little working, because I was hilariously going to the gym a lot and it was just to maintain how fat I was. Yeah. Like the second you take that away, I keep, I'm getting fatter and more out of shape. Yeah.

I mean, you know, you really should, especially because it's going to be a repeat of like when your foot was fucked up and you're just home, you know, you're forced to stay home. Once I'm not scared to go outside, because I am right now, the paranoia has hit me big time. Yeah. I'll start doing a little fucking. I was doing walks and little fucking shit like that outside, like taking a fucking hour-long walk every day, but I'm, I'm fucking scared.

I'm going to just, well, can you get like a fucking elliptical or something? Just get a mask and gloves. I have a little bike that I ride. Yeah. It's just 20 minutes. Do that then. But it hurts my knees. It's a fucked up shitty bike.

You should get like, you should get a Fitbit or an Apple watch or something or just like a heart rate monitor at least and then try to get your, try to get your heart rate up for like 20 minutes a day. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What they call the danger zone. That's what the-

Danger zone. That's what the doctors recommend is to people with pre-existing conditions elevate their heart rate into the danger zone, because that's when fat, when fat is in danger. Liquefies. Yeah. Being burned up. It's a danger of, yeah, going into your heart. I love, I love, yeah, just like elliptical machines and treadmills that have like the

fat, illiquifier option or whatever. And it's just for like fat people that have been tricked and the fat people that use that setting once ever in their life. Yeah. They're like, wow, I burned 15 calories. I'm doing a fat burning workout. Yeah. I went to the elliptical, I did the elliptical, I did a fat burning workout.

Yeah. Well, I've been doing the fat burning setting on the elliptical. Just how far away- I love the elliptical. Yeah. How far away they are. I love the elliptical. They're too big though for your fucking house.

Like good ones. Yeah. I mean, I do like a circuit kind of thing, but burpees will fuck your shit up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The crossfit kind of burpees where you have to go all the way down and then jump up at the end.

Yes. Yes, yes. Yeah. I'm going to put a hole through my fucking third floor or fucking apartment. Yeah. I was doing some jumping jacks. I was just like, doof. Doof.

Yeah. But maybe I'll go to the basement, go to the laundry room, make a twerk out room, get some pussy down there. Yeah. Get pussy. You should try. If you can do burpees without fucking up your joints, I mean, it would probably be hard on your wrists and elbows and shit.

Yeah. My knees. Yeah. My knees. Yeah. I mean, it would fuck all your shit up. But they're like, they're really good for, they'll get your heart rate up quick. And then because you have like an idea of how many you need to do in your head, it's

not like fucking staring at like a treadmill counter just waiting for 20 minutes of you. It's getting through this shit. Yeah. Yeah. So it makes it easier to like just- But my t- look how good my titties are, they're coming in nice. Yeah. And you've shaved part of them.

That's cool. Is that, did you? That's a good look. No. This is how my body hair looks. I don't know what to tell you. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Getting pussy from a man. Getting a man's pussy. All right. I've just been doing mad pull-ups and push-ups. Yeah. But you, you weigh 10 pounds in your week. So what am I supposed to do? So it doesn't-

Dude, I'm cutting and then bulking. I'm just discouraging you. I'm bulking right now. That's my thing. I'm bulking. Bulking and then cut. Cut. Or when do you cut?

I'm going to cut. Yeah. Stop bulking. Adam, you should turn, you should get rid of all those books and turn in that room and do like a home gym. I have an elliptical here and then I have like a pull-up bar. I've considered getting a squat rack for my apartment. You just should.

I mean, I could put it in my office, I could put it right fucking here. I could put it next to this thing. It's just, I would, I would barely have room. I mean, this room is only like, yeah, yeah, seven feet wide maybe. I don't know if there would be room to put a barbell in here or not. I don't know how- Put it in your bedroom. I don't know how long a barbell is, but that seems like it's pushing it.

Yeah. It's close. Yeah. I wish I had an elliptical. Yeah. Having like a bench and a squat rack in the apartment and then, but of course what would happen is the quarantine ends the next day and then I'm just a fucking retard with like a home gym.

Yeah. Yeah. Probably. Although you know what, man, don't act like you'd be mad about that. Well, I would because it's like you can't drop the weight. Do resistance bands work? I don't know. Racine got them and they seem like bullshit.

I mean, like they're- They seem like bullshit. They make sense if you like add them to a barbell, but because it's like they're self-regulating. So like if you're lazy, if you're not looking to push yourself anyways, then what the fuck good is a resistance band? Because depending on like where you hold it changes the level of resistance. You could, yeah. I would like to do one to fucking get your stroke up.

You put one around your waist while you fucking air hump. Yeah. That's the other thing, dude. Well, my fucking skills are going to completely deteriorate. I'm going to be so out of shape. Yeah, man. You were like, you were so good at fucking before this. Dude, I was fucking world-renowned, bro.

But pussy eating for sure is going to be an issue, dude, because I was trying to get like the fucking finger-popping move. I was trying to figure that out, like really get my- What, at home alone during the quarantine? Flexibility? No, just eating pussy a lot, really getting in there. But now it's like I haven't eaten pussy. I won't have eaten pussy in months.

Oh, dude, it's like riding a bike. You'll be back in there. No, but your strength. I have a bad shoulder. Well, he doesn't know how to get there. He can't ride a bike either. I can ride a bike, thank you very much. It's like riding a bike.

Eventually, you'll lose the ability to do it because you're too fat. Eventually, you'll need a motorized version of it to get around. It's just like riding a bike. All right, anyway, fuck. All right, boys. All right. Happy Passover. Oh, yeah, dude.

Happy Passover. This is when your motherfuckers started your treachery. Maybe we can do it. Oh, because you're pro-Egypt? Huh? You're pro-Pharaoh? No. Why did Jesus come into fucking Jerusalem?

What was he coming in for? Pussy? Passover? Yeah. Or something. I wasn't there, dude. I didn't see it. All right.

It's definitely... That's why it's all around the same time. Did you just serve in Passover? Yeah, dude. Because he comes in because he's a Jew and he's celebrating Passover. And then you guys got mad. He was getting more fucking burned than you. Everyone was like, this guy rocks.

And then this guy's so much better than the old Jews. And then the Romans independently decided without any influence to crucify. Yeah, right, dude. Pontius Pilate was nothing but fucking... He was Pinocchio and you motherfuckers were Geppetto. Yeah, because definitely they were listening to Jews back then. So much. That's what they want you to think.

They've rode it back. They've gone in and rode it back. Anyway, we don't have to get into all this theology, all this history. I miss you guys. Maybe we do a Zoom birthday party? The three of us? Whose birthday is it? It's my birthday.

Yeah, my... It makes in December. Mine's in February. Yeah, nobody's birthday's coming up. All right, later. All right. Anyway, see you guys. Bye-bye.