The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - Ep. 214 – The Taste of Coke Zero

Episode Date: July 2, 2020

the taste of it

So, I'm gay. I'm a fucking gay guy. I will be. My dick is small. I have texting to do. I'm gay. Check. We're recording. Oh, nice. There we are. Wow. Check, check. Hi. Do we have reads? Huh? What? You can just say it. You can just say do we have reads? Do we have reads? Why are you scared to ask? Yeah, I just wanted to be professional. I was about to check. Yeah, that is. I'm gay. My dick is small. I can't get high. Dude, I wish I could sing. Me too. Just to hit, not to actually have a career, but to like, when I do a parody song, be able to hit the high notes. I honestly believe it's like when you're playing basketball alone on a court and you're like, I'm actually good and then other people show up. I have had a couple moments on my own where I have sung well. Well, there are people that have careers and musically can't sing. Wait, I see. I would want to make, dammit, now I'm trying to look up. You would want to make fun of that. With reads and that's like, oh man, I could sink my teeth into that one. Into what? Into him saying, just bragging about quiet moments where he's been able to sing well. Just bring it up to bring to mention it. And then be like, you know what? The other day I was sitting around alone. I was alone picking up compliments for myself. What's happening in your fucking mind? I did actually compliment myself as like that's that's that's pretty good. That's pretty good, Adam. Yeah. Yeah, I never think I can sing. No, I know I can. I can barely speak.

You can speak and you can do impressions. I don't know if it's like because you know how your voice sounds different in your head. Yes. And I guess that has to do with like the. I get that. Do you guys anymore? I don't know. Have you heard your voice enough times where it doesn't anymore where the way it resonates in your skull? No, I sound completely different. Really? Yeah. Oh, I've always assumed that I was like a baritone. But yeah. Well, I said exactly like James White or James Brown. Barry White. No, not only is my voice is my voice a different register, like the way it sounds to me. Yeah. But it's also like not as flat. And like it's the same thing with my face where I think I'm like I have emotions. Oh, right. You don't. Right. And then I and it got worse as I got older. Really? Yeah, there'd be like pictures from shows and I look like a blind person. I don't know what the fuck happened, but I used to have I used to have some range of emotions. Well, I can't find the reads, which that was the main reason. Why don't you look again? I didn't want to. You wouldn't mean you can't find them. No, I mean, on the calendar, there's nothing, which means that there's no, we don't have anything booked this week. Oh, OK. That's fine. As long as I could have the copy. So OK. Well, as long as we don't have something. I'm going to shut up. I'm off. Don't you should. You should contribute more. I've been hearing from numerous people that in my absence, you were. I would phrase it as doing your job. Thank you. Well, you know, I felt unencumbered. I felt free to be me. You know, I would say things like sometimes I sing well when I'm on my own. And and stuff would be like, I believe in that. I think a lot. Well, the guy from Bright Eyes can't sing. Is that your example of a famous person that can't sing? Yeah. Well, I don't even remember what his voice sounds like. I feel like the name of that band is an assault on people like me.

I knew someone that used to I can't sing at all. Who else can't sing? Who else can't sing like in a band? The Ramones. Those guys can't sing. Every punk band can sing. Billy Corgan can sing. Billy Corgan can sing. He sings in his own way. I'm gay. Really only a couple of people can sing. The guy from Celine Dion, Jim Blossom, Susan Boyle, Michael Stipe. He can sing that much. Yeah, I would say he's a medium one. Can he sing or not? He's not Celine Dion. David Byrne can't sing. Who's David Byrne? Talking heads. Can't sing. You can't sing. Yeah, I guess he's not that good of a singer. I guess there aren't any. He really can't sing. He can't sing at all. Talking heads is great, but it's just like... We went on and everyone fucked my ass. And they went, we had a friend. That's not singing. I like KISS because none of them could sing, but they all took turns singing. That's pretty cool.

Let's all try. They just keep fucking around. They just ran around the stage trying each instrument. That sounds terrible. Shout out to Ace Freely, the guitar player. Everybody suck my penis. Fuck me in my ass. Everybody suck my penis. I didn't realize this. The guy from the Dead Candidates sounds like the guy from the B-52. I'd never heard the Dead Candidates. I thought they were like some kind of... California. I can't believe this was like punk. That guy sounds like a fucking clown. Like a literal circus clown. He was actually murdered in CHOP over the weekend. A lot of people don't know that. The offer was raped and murdered. I did not know that. The Seattle PD was refusing to investigate.

Because of according to the statute that when somebody fucks around and finds out, we cannot investigate according to that. We have our own autonomous zone now. I thought about checking it out on the way to Barnes & Noble. I'm so glad they reopened Barnes & Noble before the criterion sale. What do you mean there's a criterion sale? Every July and there's a 50% off sale. They do like a secret. It's not a secret. I don't think it's advertised. The secret is that Barnes & Nobles exists. Once you find that out, then you can... I didn't even know Barnes & Noble was still around. I think they're just online. What if they're hiding pussy in there too?

There's good pussy at Barnes & Noble. I don't think they're brick and mortar anymore. Are you serious? There's like six Barnes & Nobles in Brooklyn. Can I be honest? The vibes at Barnes & Noble are always... I haven't seen one I feel like in forever. I always enjoyed my time at Barnes & Noble. I used to go...

I can imagine young Stavros just... his eyes welling up with tears imagining himself as someone who reads books. First of all, I could read and I did read back then. I used to feel... I was a young intellectual. But also they had a little fucking coffee shop and they had little muffins up front. So there's nothing wrong with it. I was gonna get to that.

Trust me. He's looking at the books, have a biscotti. Absolutely. A couple biscottis. The escalator. I did like writing the escalator. I'm here to read some cookies. Where was I... Oh yeah, I used to steal porn all the time.

I would read... When I was like 15 or 14, I wanted to be like my cousin. My cousin Leonida, who now is a 37 year old man whose job is... He works at a bar three months out of the year. Oh, on the island? With tourists.

He just lives in a tent in an island. He's a bar back as an almost 40 year old man. That's the other cool thing about Greece. Greece shut everything down because of corona and they completely controlled it. And they didn't give a fuck because they don't have an economy. They were just like, yeah, who gives a fuck? We're not losing our... We don't have jobs.

So they had a little leg up on everybody. Yeah, because everyone already was staying home. Yeah, they were all just getting fucking... Yeah, they were all just drinking coffee with their friends. Anyway, when I wanted to be like Leo, who was a big metalhead, I spent a lot of my time reading about... I read the Led Zeppelin book,

where they talk about putting a fish in a woman's pussy. Hammer of the Gods. I believe that's the only book. Now that I'm thinking about it, I think that's actually the only one of those that I read. But I thought about reading other ones, too. So you read that and the Giver. I started reading something about Black Sabbath.

I read Ozzie's autobiography. Apparently, he's retarded. Apparently, he said he was called thick back then, but he has a series of learning disabilities. And that's why he went into crime at first. But then he went into fucking metal. And he went into being into British crime? Yeah, he was like...

He was a peeky blonde. Yeah, the fucking scarecrow from Batman was ordering him around. That's what... There's no such thing as a cockney accent. It's just retarded British people. There's no other option for people with a series of learning disabilities but to go into crime.

Hell yeah. What are we doing, the dropping? Which way did it... Which way did it bakery? I'm gonna get the baguettes and sell them for more. I'm trying to have a... What are they called? Biscuit.

Well, cookies, biscuits. Fuck that. It's fucked up, right? That's very fucked up. That's a lock stock and two extra chromosomes. Yeah, and the guest to the director is gay, Richie. Oh, nice. Thank you. He just makes the old laboratory guys kiss.

The first movie. I started doing a... I'm not married to a daughter. I'm married to a guy. He's dead because I'm gay. Who's like the male equivalent of Madonna? Male Donna. Uh...

Madonna. McDonald. I'm like a virgin. That's who gay Richie's husband is. I'm like a virgin. Madonna. They come in there, they see me, they say, look at this guy, he's like a virgin.

I've never seen an asshole so tight. I've never seen anybody so beautiful he's like a virgin. That's right, McDonald. That's why I love having sex with them. I can't even do British anymore. Yeah. I'm gone, Richie.

I saw a guy, Richie. Have you seen a picture of Baron recently? He's massive. He's tall, yeah. He's like 6'8". He's enormous. What if he became an awesome basketball player? That would be so annoying.

Well, he's going to become Dr. Manhattan. That's the track we're on. Is Baron Trump's going to be irradiated and turn blue and live on the moon and have his dick hanging out. Huge dick. And society's all destroyed. His giant retard dick.

He's just reflecting on... That's awesome. My son, he's 13 years old. He's 7'5". It's tremendous. People say they've never seen such a big boy. I don't get it. I'm like a virgin, folks.

What are some other Madonna songs? I don't know a single other Madonna song. There's one that's an absolute jam. Take me there. Oh, I'm going to take you. Like a prayer. Like a prayer is a fucking banger. It's about blowjob.

Really? Yeah, pop it up and preach. Pop it up and preach is another good one. But like a prayer, it has that fucking tasty ass riff. I'm down on my knees, I'm going to take you there. I didn't even know it was about getting your dick sucked. Do black people say McDonough?

They say McDonough. I love listening to McDonough. Do they say that? Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Do they add mix? Like Scree. That's how they found out. Things get changed to a cave for some reason.

What do you think with Madonna? I don't believe so. There might be places where that's emergent. What's my favorite one of those I ever saw? I was in a 7-Eleven one time and these black teenagers come in and one of them yells to his friend across the back.

He's like, hey, get me a slurshi. Yeah, slurshi is really good. Because it's got slur. That's the only part they save. The rest of the word is... Go get rid of it. Slur stays the same. Slur is good.

Slur, we're keeping that. And then we're just going to make up the end part here. Two chains used to do something where he would put ends. Or like a nose or something. I don't remember what he did. But one time he would say he was going to get some pussy. And he was like, I'm going to get some penusi.

And it sounded like he said penusus, like peanut. I'm forgetting. Penusi. Did you see that Wallet tweet? What? He's like, my new album is called... It's Pain plus Famous. My new album is...

I'm calling it Painus. That's awesome. I love that he has to explain it first because it doesn't make any fucking sense. Painus. Yeah, it sounds like you're either saying penis. He's like, by the way... Or like your asshole got fucked so much.

It hurts. And they said no. So I'm just going to explain what it means. Yeah, penis. Penus is awesome, dude. My penis. Yeah, it's really good. I hope that was real and not a made up tweet.

But I'm pretty sure he did. You might have gotten caught with your pants down. Maybe I've been fooled once again by one of those. Everyone thought that Jersey Mike's was renaming their sandwich the BLM. Yeah, there was no way that was real.

That's ridiculous. But everybody thought that shit. At least everyone... If Jersey Mike's was like, hey, we're not racist anymore. We're taking Jersey out of the name. Now it's just called Michael's. It's called Sandwiches by Michael. Michael's Sandwiches.

And not the gay art one either. It's a gay man named Michael. Gay Michael Sandwiches. Yeah, a human and his husband have a combined income of $750,000 a year. $150,000 a year. And they're down with the cause. Yeah, fuck.

Ah, fuck boys. I want to... Fuck boys. Did you see that post? That was real. What? Some girl posted like some thing on Instagram like an email from a professor to her sister and their family's like Vietnamese. And this... Oh, I did see this.

This girl's name is PHUCBUI. Yeah. And the professor was like, can you please anglicize your name? I would call you fuck boy. Yeah, just don't say fuck boy. Say Phuc. Or boy.

Like if I moved to China, right? And my name meant like... Mr. Penis. Your name was Mr. Penis. My full name. Not even Mr. Penis. But like, when you... The sound of my name meant like a boob

that don't call you back. Like if that was the full name, I'd be like, okay, I'll pick a Chinese name. I'm Liu Kang now. Yeah. But he's probably not... It's not... Is it pronounced fuck boy? Yes. It is?

Alright, damn. Hold on, let me load up my... I didn't even look into it at all. Yes! Yes! Also, who used somebody's full name? You can call her... Her first name is Phuc boy.

Phuc boy? That's awesome. I say keep it, but make him say it in that voice. I had a character that I was laughing about for like a month. It was like a Vietnamese guy that hates self-loading Asian Vietnamese guy named Phuc Banguk.

Yes, that's right. I remember that. Yeah. Yeah, my name is Phuc Banguk. I do recall that. Yeah. Getting that text. Scared me again. Phuc Banguk.

That's right. That is correct. Damn, it's stuffy in here, bro. I know. It's like a window at least, motherfucker. The window is cracked. It's not cracked, but it is kind of humid outside.

Maybe throw in the AC, fuck it. Fuckin' bitch. Bored in my dick, I'm gay. You suck, man. I only get phone calls when I'm doing a podcast. I'm sorry to hear it. Well, inconvenient timing

that I made a nose snorting, clearing my throat voice right as you ripped ass, so it sounds like that was directly in my face. Well, it was. For everyone at home, it was Nick. Nick isn't using his phone. Stav has a saddle on his head

that I'm riding him around. No, not at all. Stav is completely naked and I'm riding around. He has a helmet. He has a propeller beanie on. The propeller is removed. A helmet.

He has a multi-colored helmet with a saddle on it. I'm riding him around. Adam, no, it's not. I've got a stick with a hot dog on the end, dangling from string. That wouldn't work because I just had a bagel, so I'm not even that hungry.

Hot dogs that much. I'm not even hungry, actually. Dude, I had lunch with Ralphie May rest in peace one time. He's a very good guy. I heard he was really nice. He's a fucking sweetheart. He's got a larger conversation about diet and exercise or whatever.

He was like, yeah, the doctors, they've got no idea why I'm this size. The doctors? I'm a team of doctors. I'm a team of doctors day and night. Going over the details. I guess so.

For the most part, there are other issues, but for the most part, a lot of that shit is calories in, calories in the world. He's like, I want a food. I don't need any of it. I feel like he forced himself to not eat.

He had already ordered a shit ton of food and we're at the restaurant. You were telling me that what he ordered was wild. That was the same, it might have been the same weekend. Different meal. We went out to breakfast and got a cheeseburger

and he only ate half of it. That wasn't breakfast. Maybe it was lunch, I don't know. I'm trying to figure out whether it was the same day different meals. It must have been different days. I distinctly remember it was a cheeseburger that he cut in half while making the point

that I don't even need anything. You know the second you were gone, he had a full pizza. He took a bunch of people like Papa Dose and dropped like 3 grand. What's Papa Dose? Oh, like a seafood? We're in New Orleans?

You've never heard of this place. I just mentioned the name and your brain can already do the arithmetic. What's Papa Dose? Oh, it's a seafood restaurant. Calculating. And what do they got? Fried baby alligators on the menu

with a creole dipping sauce. Just a whole menu with creole sauces. Yeah, it is what happened. Somewhere in the back of my head I know that there's a restaurant called Papa Dose. It's New Orleans, right?

Or no, maybe just like a... Oh yeah, so now I'm checking a voicemail real quick. Alright. The company that makes the fucking light ring that's broken that we can't use. Oh. Oh yeah, we're going to have videos set up. They have a technical support department

where you have to leave a voicemail. Oh, that always works out. Yeah. Why? I have no idea. Why not an email? But... Ralphie May.

Oh yeah, Papa Dose. So that's the story. If you're new to the podcast you've probably only heard that one, two, or three times. You were getting the same stories from now until it ends. Yeah. Our lives stopped happening the second this started.

Eternal recurrence, right? The second the show made enough money that I could afford my $400 rent. Because I was deluding myself there was a couple months there where I'm like I'm putting all of this money in savings and I'm keeping my day job and I'm just going to... Yeah, you wanted to stay on the truck

and then I bought PlayStation and I was like never mind. I will not be doing that. That sounds gay actually. Did you periodically have like designs on getting a working man job? I did actually.

You wanted to work at the Volvo dealership? I did actually keep the truck job for months. Yeah, you were doing it for a while. Yeah, actually I continued doing those jobs for like a year after. Yeah. I thought about that too, but then I was like

I think we talked about this last week. You do the math on how much a regular job pays and you're like what the fuck? I'm not working at a grocery store. I wanted to work at a grocery store to get lunch meats on discount. When was this? When you moved to New York? Probably yeah.

Doing the truck jobs is like sometimes it's just nice to be in a production environment. I mean it is you know, gets you out of the house. The jobs are fun usually. You see something different every time. And they pay a lot. It's when you do have the out of being

like well I don't need to do this. It's very easy to not do. I mean it's very easy to not do anything. I love not doing anything. Like the dishes. You know what I mean? Absolutely brother. Oh yeah. Yeah, I remember one of those jobs they called Nick up

and you called me and you were like hey they just they told me that you have to dress like you want a future in the film industry tomorrow. And I was like Nick are you going to do that? He's like absolutely not. Yeah, that job sucked. And that guy was a dickhead.

That's the problem is sometimes for the most part doing that job the people that you're like answering to used to also drive the trucks and work their way up. But sometimes it's just because the people that are like directors or whatever, usually

they're like fucking either NYU or something. They're people that are like 48 years old and dress like they're 23. They just like fucking were handed this like bullshit commercial director life. Because commercial directors don't actually

direct. It's always the client. I don't think they really do anything. It's always like the fucking bullshit like marketing person at the company that's like like running the show. Commercial directors kind of just like stand there and.

That was a good job. That guy was like asking me to like pay for parking for the truck out of pocket. And he's like I'll reimburse you. Was that the one at Chelsea Piers? Yeah. And then it took him months to get payment

but then the reimbursement payment it's like this is fucking completely unacceptable. We should find him and fuck him up. I got in trouble for staying around craft services for too long on that job. What were you eating? I was just like eating all day. As you should.

That's who it's for. That's who that food is for. Not the people that are going to go out anyways and have a six thousand dollar dinner afterwards. I was so broke. You had too many grapes. That's what I mean.

There's no understanding. It really is. People should have to go to a labor prison camp. There should be some kind of reeducation. Eight months minimum. And that is people did used to have a concept of

everyone should have a summer job. 15 or 16 you should be working at McDonald's or something. Yeah. Doing something that sucks dick so you know how much that sucks. And there should be some kind of social credit system or surveillance state that monitors

really all of your phone calls to customer service departments they should go into some kind of state wide monitoring thing and if you ever like fucking lose your shit in a way that's unwarranted at somebody that works in a call center

you should check your file. You go right back to the labor camps. And then you have to do a year the labor camps which are just the call centers. Oh shit. It's a never ending system. That's a perfect engine. That's very equitable.

It's a beautiful engine. Like in a pretty cool in 30 years when we all just have to learn like broken Chinese and we all get call center jobs doing technical support for the Chinese sex robots that they're all married to over there. They just

knew us. Ni Hao, Xing Huang, Hui, the pussy doesn't work. Speak Chinese fucking fact. Subtitles.

Your real fucking name. I am very sorry. Your name is not really fuck boy. Your name is your name is Nick, isn't it? You probably got a weird name. Like John or Eric. It's not fuck

big a book. That would be a nice act of like quiet rebellion as we're forced into just answering phones for Chinese sex robot companies, but you get to pick your name. Oh, yeah. My name is my name is

my name is Qingchong Bingbao. Racist shit you could possibly think of. That's how we resist. They're like, okay, Qingchong Bingbao. They're fucking every time you answer the phone you go, thanks for calling. My name is Qingchong Bingbao.

How can I help you? That's like our field hours. That's our amazing grace. Qing Qing Qing Qingchong Bingbao. Qingchong

Ding Dong Ding Dong And they all started off as like Africans doing a racist impression of the English language. Like this stupid they sound and it's just an approximation and then that's what became what it is.

We cracked the code. I like to go back to the Qingchong Bingbao thing at some point they go they try and get us all to stop and they're like, which one of you here is Qingchong Bingbao? It's like Spartacus where it's like I am Qingchong Bingbao. I am Qingchong Bingbao.

And we all get crucified for our beliefs. Oh, I can't wait to resist. Oh, fuck. Damn, I want more water. I once was straight but now I'm

gay. Dude, I love this recent thing where it's like every morning there's a thunderstorm and then it goes away. It's kind of nice. It's like monsoon season. I was smoking that CBD weed. Hell yeah, me too.

I love it too. It's great. It's fucking great, dude. And this isn't even a read. We literally love it. It makes me feel like the dude, you know? Uh huh. Like I'm waking up and getting toasted. It makes you feel like that. But you're also your day is not ruined

because you're not like fucking like Oh fuck, dude. The government. There's not that. Yeah. It is quite nice. I think I ran out or I don't know where I put it or something.

You ran out of the stash? Oh, they said they could send more. Oh, hell yeah. Keep it coming. I'm going to respond to that email. You're listening. This is basically a free read. It's a free read. There's slogan.

If you got it, then it's smoking if you got it. Smoke them if you got them. It's like whatever fucking guy was like somebody's cousin that became the marketing was like how about smoke it, you know? Just because you do what you feel.

How about just do just smoking just smoke weed. It's been the smart one in the family. I do love when business is just like if there's a restaurant, there's just one you just have your one cousin who's not in the kitchen.

You know, man, you're going to do the advertising. I'm aesthetics. Yeah. I'm thinking I, you know, I think of like artistic style. You know, that's how that is funny that one Chinese place you went to that was like all like matrix

type shit. Yeah. I've been back there a couple times. It's not even Chinese food though. It's not. It's like it's like fucking like just some guy that's been a chef for 400 years. Yeah. Just in New York like chef

who's he spends 50% of his time cooking and then the other 50% of the time being profiled in magazine. Like that one of those kind of one level of chef. Korean guy that was raised by you is now like fucking

just like tripping off strikes if you ask me off his own cooking fumes. You know, doing like the music. That's what's going on. I don't even know how you like they would come up with some of those because it's not Chinese. I mean, it's just like it's something that if you've already

tasted everything that you only come up with if you've done. It's just a ton of Szechuan pepper corns and everything. I fuck with Szechuan pepper corns. I just got some sorry guys from Amazon. Wow. Putting money in Bezos pocket. Well, I really want I want to have

good Chinese. You're about to fucking leave. You could have called. You could have fucking ordered it and gotten seven let it come in seven days. I guess I should have. But you had to do prime even though you're about to leave for the whole fucking weekend. Yeah. And I got

Chinese cooking wine and dark soy sauce. There's a difference kind of soy sauce. Well differences. There's black soy sauce which is like molasses and sweet. And there's dark soy sauce which is like Chinese soy sauce. What kind of swill do we have?

Well, there's a bunch of different kinds. There's tamari which is like a different kind if you're gluten free. I've had tamari. Yeah, it's not bad. It's all right. Yeah. Different types of soy sauces. Yeah, dude, it's

my favorite food, of course. I would say Asian in general is my favorite, but I guess if I had to narrow it down. Mm-hmm. It's still Korean. Still just KBBQ. It's Korean. Damn. When's the next time I'm going to get to go to KBBQ?

A communal type of food seems like the kind of shit they won't let you have. Oh yeah, with COVID? Unless they put you in a little dome and it's just you and your friends in a glass dome having Korean barbecue. Donald Trump you need to open up hibachi. Yeah, I have to go to

Benning Honest. Now I'm thinking about where do we go? Me and you went to Japanese Barbecue somewhere. Was that Montreal? Yeah, damn. I love that. That was good. After we saw that open mic with the French guy. What's it called? Yakiniku? Yeah. Yakiniku, that's correct. Good job, Adam.

I love just going, just getting completely irresponsible food. I met up with David in Toronto. Hell yeah. And like I guess the timing got fucked up, so I was in a Japanese Barbecue. I was like, I give Haku by myself for like an hour and a half. Respect.

And I'm like, well I guess I got to keep the food coming. Dude, that's a dream for me. Having to kill an hour and a half in a fucking barbecue restaurant like that? Oh my god, dude. How dare you be late? I'm sorry. I don't want to be rude to you. They're like, it's okay. We'll wait. No, I don't

want to be rude. So just I don't, I have manners. Unlike you Japanese people why don't you put your shoes back on? Put your shoes back on, bring another plate of the ribs out. Put your shoes back on and get back in the kitchen. I remember when I was a kid, I thought Hibachi was the coolest thing.

Like the tricks that they did and stuff. I used to beg my parents to go to bed. I mean, I've never been to one of this place. What? Never? Never once. I went on prom night, I think. I did think it was the guy. I didn't think it was a cool concept. The fuck the guy. But yeah, I've never been there.

The closest thing to that is I had a friend that took us to the melting pot. Oh yeah. Fondue is probably dead too. Fondue restaurant on their birthday. Oh my god. There goes Fondue. There goes. I've never been there. I've never had Fondue and I guess we never will.

That shit was cool. Really? So you're coming out pro fondue. Well, I mean it's cool because you're doing something. I like to do something. That's part of the KBBQ. That's why diners work. Because they, you know, there's a jukebox somewhere usually. Yep. They're making coffee the whole time.

That is very funny that they put jukeboxes in diners. That they give they give somebody, they put that kind of control just to people that are in diners. Well, it used to be the only restaurant allowed was a diner. That was the only restaurant in a whole town. What do you mean?

What does it have to do with jukeboxes? Well, because it's entertainment. No, but I mean it's like that it's not in the back and the staff chooses. I know they put it in the hands of the people. It was a draw. Yeah. To get the youth in there. Yeah, that's I think

it's a good idea to start like a fine dining restaurant that also has jukeboxes. No, that's a bad idea. What about a French restaurant? That's a horrible idea. A bistro jukebox. A French restaurant like they only have like was it pre pre price fixed Yeah, pre-fee.

Yeah, pre-fee jukebox. I never know how many letters pronounce in French. Pre-fee. Pre-fee. I'm not even going to say this word. I love how they're like they're like we are so lazy we say half the word. We do a French restaurant nice place

like that, but then it also just has a Chuck E. Cheese going around this guy in a rack costume going around asking people other meals. That's because French people are retarded. They are. They are. I'm a French chucky. I'm French chucky.

He is a big rat, but I love him. Bonjour, Chuck E. Bonjour, Chuck E. Bonjour, Chuck E. I don't know. Merci, Chuck E. I watched John Wick again last night.

You know what I watched? I watched him take off a man's pants with a fucking pencil. I watched him bring a man to orgasm with a pencil. He hit his G-spot from the back with the only a pencil. I watched a movie

that seems like it's one of the original like type of those types of movies. Which is what? It's called The Lone Wolf in the Cub. It's some Japanese shit. I got criteria on now. I got criteria on recently and it's like a 1970s

Japanese movie. It's about a fucking guy that they try and dishonor him, but he just slashes everybody the fuck up. It's John Wick style. And there's a part in the movie where a bunch of bandits are like, we're going to kill you unless

you fuck this hot lady. And the lady's like oh, she's getting ready to kill herself. She's like, a samurai like that would never fuck me. And then he's like, wait. And then he fucks her while everybody watches. And then she's like

I knew he was honorable and not a coward. Because he could stay hard the whole time while everybody watched us. What a great guy. It was honestly one of the best movies I've ever seen in my life. Really? It sounds cool. It was fucking tight. You ever see Tokyo Drifter?

Yeah. That movie's cool. It's sick. You should do that one next. Tokyo Drifter. It's on criteria. Dude, I'm about to go crazy with the old movies. Ever since I watched 1938 Robin Hood, I'm in on this shit now. I'm watching all the classics. That was the Errol Flynn one. Errol Flynn.

Yeah. Shots out to Errol. He was charismatic. He was drunk his entire life. Respect. He just kept a butt. He was Australian. When the fuck did they start letting Australian people into America? 1938 is too early for that type of shit. What? You think that there was a ban on Australians?

It's fucked up to me that there was an Australian star in America in 1938 when the rest everything else was so racist. There was no prejudice towards Australians. Well, they're white. It just seems like there should have been some. Well, I agree. There should be more racism towards Australians.

I'm just saying if Black people is the 30s you know what I mean? There's still like basic sharecropping going on. Yeah. And we just let Australians fucking waltz in here. That's fucked up. And he gets to be a big time movie star. He gets to be a swashbuckler. Fuck that dude. Fuck Errol Flynn.

No, he's tight, dude. No, he was cool. He said like sex parties or something. I have to admit I liked him a good deal. And just some strikes rubbed me the wrong way with Australia being legitimized so early in the America. Yeah, man. I just feel like it should be a

post-World War II thing. Well, it was it was part of England. How the fuck did he even get over here? 1938? An Australian movie? For real. How good were the planes in 1938? What do you mean? They had planes from Australia. Like how long did it take you to

get from Australia to America in 1930s? I guess they had planes. Would you have to take a boat? You're in the fucking boat for like months? Taking a boat was sick. A boat from Australia to America in the 30s? That must have been fucking horrible. Yeah. And yeah, like what do you what else are you

going to do? I don't know. It's funny because it's like there's so many distractions now, but then you spend so much time on the distractions that it's like you go back 15 years ago and you're like what if what if I gave you a small handheld phone and you had to stare at it for 15

hours a day every day of your life. Yeah. You'd be like oh shit, I don't know if I could do that. You're like no, but there's words on there that make you angry. Right, right, right. Yeah. And then you can beat off every once in a while to just calm you down. Yeah.

I have been watching a lot of Entourage recently. It is very funny. It's nice to see flip phones. I need drugs now to not use my phone. Yeah. Well, time to smoke drugs so I can put the phone on. Time to do psychedelics. So I can watch John Wick.

Which feels like somehow like better for you. Absolutely. It is. Finally logged off, went back to being completely enveloped in media the way I was 20 years ago. This is the thing that was ruining my brain

for this thing that we are. Everybody already was kind of cynical. Yeah. Fuck dude. But yeah, I'm about to be a little film buff, dude. I got the criteria on. I'm loving that for you, dude. I got rid of the criteria and channel. I'm going back to

the bullies. Is what makes criteria. I'm not a collector type guy. It's not the collection. It's all the supplementary materials and a lot of the fucking shit on the criteria and channel is better. I feel like better game struck, but like on the criteria and channel that's lacking.

Well, I just don't give a fuck about any of that. I just want actual access to the movies. Yeah. Well, they do a lot of them do have like the criteria and collection on the streaming platform where they have like the supplemental stuff. But who does not? What do you mean a lot of them?

A lot of the titles they they like. They have some of them, but I've looked at things that I have the physical copy of and it's like half of the content. That's it. You know, or it's just not there. Well, some of them come with like a two-hour documentary or like the DVD commentary. See, I got to watch

I just want to watch the fucking movie, man. I don't need all that shit. There's so many movies. I'm going to watch a movie about the movie I just watched. Yeah, if you watch a movie and you like it, you want to like consume more about the movie. I guess that's true. I would watch. Figure out like what the people who made it were thinking. I guess I would watch more about that

1938 Robin Hood. Yeah, there you go. It was cool, man. You were watching an interview with the director or maybe like I would love to shot shot by shot the director being like, okay, yeah, what we're doing? I've changed my mind completely on this point. I've done a complete 180 on this. That sounds awesome. It's fucking sweet.

Now I'm pissed. DVDs came out and like DVDs all had DVD commentary and I was pitching this big feature and basically the only people that gave a shit about it are like absolute movie facts. Right, right. So most people are like, who gives a shit about DVD commentary? I used to, I did use to actually listen to that stuff. Yeah, and it's cool.

Yeah. Yeah. I used to listen. I listened to, especially when I was like a kid that wanted to do comedy, I would listen to the Anchorman one and I listened to the fucking 40 year old Virgin one big time. Yeah. Well, that's the thing is they put that DVD commentary on shit that didn't

need it. And then it's like now special features are like I don't even know. I didn't even look. I have a copy of Logan on 4K and one of the special features is watch the movie in black and white. Right, right, right, right. How's that even, I could do that on my TV

you fucking assholes. Yeah. That's barely a special feature. Watch a shitier version of the movie. In a way it wasn't even, it'll buffer with a way we weren't, didn't intend to present it ever. Yeah, I feel like special features went away when people stopped

renting movies that like blockbuster. Cause that's when I used to watch all of them. When I started renting movies. Well, I don't think it was rent. It was just like when it became streaming no one gave a fucking more. It's not the rental aspect. Yeah, sure.

Yeah, I remember the Children of Men documentary. That was a good ass movie. That's where I found out about Was that on the DVD? It was on the DVD. That's when I found out who Slavoj Zizek was when I was like 16. Children of Men. Is it Children of Men? Is it a good ass movie?

Is it a good penis of children is a good movie about Adam's penis? Yes, that's true. A penis of children. And it's actually about your penis. Oh, it's okay. You're the children. One of the children. Children of penis. No, no, no.

Penis of children. Adam's favorite movie. Yeah, it's a movie about you on one hand, but on the other hand, it's your favorite movie. Cause the time it spends on a different cause it's, you would think it's just about literal children's

penises, but some of the time it's about an adult man's penis that's the size of a child. And that's the part of it that's about you. But your favorite, the part of it that's your favorite movie is about half of the movie is actually spent on actual children's penises. And that's your favorite movie.

I was looking at some baby pics, you know, like the bathtub pics that your parents take. Pathetic what I was working with. If I was my parents, I would have thrown me in the fucking dumpster. Honestly, my trash isn't that bad for

a child baby. As a baby, pretty bad. My dick was nice for a baby, but then it just didn't keep growing. I mean, it grew a little bit. I don't have a baby's penis, certainly. But I don't have as big a penis as you would have guessed if you looked at my penis as a child.

I mean, thank God. Thank God I grew out of that. But that shit used to hurtle. Used to go inside. Mm hmm. There's a very good picture of me and my brother's all nude holding hands, sitting on a watermelon

holding each other's penises. We're not holding each other's cocks. Twitch lets you just do that. Yeah, you did that for your fundraiser for Switch. I thought they were pretty strict about what's on there. Look, if it raises money for Black Lives,

we got to do it for B more baby, Baltimore baby, body more Myrtle. That's very cool. Yeah, so I showed my cock off on Twitch with my brothers. We pressed it up against the webcams. I'm just reading a Reddit argument about children.

What do they say? Well, I was looking to see if any of the like the artifact distribution companies had a release of it or whatever. So on the criterion one, there is a criterion version. There is not a criterion version. So there should be. No, it's not

criterion. It's good as fuck. It's so good. That tracking shot scene. That's awesome. It's so cool. I mean, they'll put anything in the fucking criterion. They put army good. The whole thesis. Yeah. The whole idea of the criterion collection is that it's supposed to be important contributions

to like that specific genre. Oh, there's a lot of bad movies. Yeah, they should like they put fucking the marriage stories going in the criterion collection. Snooze. Yeah, I will never watch that. It looks like shit. I watched it. I watched it because I yeah, I was like maybe I'm wrong. I mean,

this looks stupid, but maybe I'm wrong. There's fucking nothing there. Yeah. It's the woman's fault. It looks horrible. I hope it's the woman's fault. Of course. I don't have to see it to know that that it was the director. It's a director. Bomb buck. No, no, no. Bomb buck clout.

No, a bomb buck clout. Is he married to somebody? Yeah, he's married to that Francis Hall lady. Never seen the lady that made it. But check this out. She's not a way of the samurai is coming to criterion. Hell yeah. Which fuck. Yeah, dude. That was that was my favorite movie

when I was like, I think 13 or 14. I never saw it. I always wanted to. And it's hard to find now, actually. I used to have it on DVD, but I sold all of my DVDs. Wow. Years ago to become one with Ghost August. I got like I got like $150

for like like probably like 20 video game 20 Xbox 360 games and then like probably 25 DVDs. And you packed up your spindle and started walking to Austin. No, the other way.

Oh, Los Angeles to LA. Yeah. Don't need these anymore. I'm going to be making the movie. I'm excited. I'm going to be making the pornography. I'm going to be making the DVD. I'm excited about this. I'm excited about what I'm going to pick up.

The special features I'm going to watch. The booklets I'm going to flip through. Oh, yeah. While eating seaweed snacks. Smoking my CBD oil. Stroking your chin. I'm a man of the 2020s. That's right. That's right. When I should wait, how much do they cost?

Normally, they're like $30 to $40 each. They're pretty expensive. So when they go, that's why they can do a 50% off sale because they're like, guess what their price normally would it still offer? In some cases, it might be a little too much. Sorry, pigs. Take it.

Sorry, you fucking bootlicker. That's the next step in like woke marketing. This company is being like, yeah. It's just McDonald's being like, why don't you go to Burger King? You fucking bootlicker. You bootlicker. There's no ethical consumption under capitalism.

So you might as well get on. Might as well just go to another fucking place. We don't even want customers. People are being like, I know where I'm eating lunch today. Retweeting it. I know where I'm getting a burger today. At the

place that did communism the right way this week. I can't wait to have my communist lunch and then go do communist shopping at Pottery Barn who just released

their trans retards fuck cops in the ass couch. I designed made out of a Bolivian trans woman's pubes. It's a

throw pill, a throw rug. No, you don't understand. Our slaves are ironic. It's performance art. That chop shit is so funny. Which it's like I can kind of get. They got the wrong guy.

It doesn't matter. The thing is, they were just in an SUV. I watched a bunch of video from that night. When you watch all of the video, it's clear that there were multiple shooting incidences throughout the night.

None of which were called on film. That whole area is like a couple of blocks. Surprisingly, not a lot of video. I guess it mostly clears out at night. What even exactly is it? It's a couple blocks. People are camping.

The city barricaded the streets off and they surrendered the police department and they were like, you guys do whatever you want. In the beginning, it was like this open air music festival bullshit.

Just what you'd expect. People were like, oh, look, we have a community garden. See how much better communism is. Which is exactly like. There's no money. The DOS bus episode of The Simpsons when Lisa's licking the slime off the rock. She goes, look, there's plenty of slime for all of us.

I don't know. There was a couple of shootings there that the initial instances of violence were scooped up immediately by right wing people on Twitter to be like, see, it's bad or whatever. Wasn't it like a SoundCloud rapper? Yeah, he was like handing out guns

to people and shit and declared himself the leader of this. Which even those kinds of criticisms it's like whatever. But now they have this fucking like, they developed some kind of like security force, I guess, which looks identical to people

marching around with assault rifles. Which is the problem. There's no label you can put on that that isn't militarized cop. Yeah, exactly. They're just doing the same shit. And so like on Sunday they shot up

some jeep. There's videos of them shooting up the jeep and then the claim was initially on social media from this one woman that happened to be the most viral tweet but not many people were paying attention to that. That it was fascists that tried to

ram the barricade. They said agitators. They were like, you know, and then this bitch is like excellent shot placement and the jeep is like riddled with bullet holes. She's like two bullet holes one for each passenger

and it's like we can see the picture. So who is this bitch? Is she somebody like celebrating that they're murdering people? They murdered people and it's like and all that fuck around find out nonsense. I love that. I love people that have never been in a fist fight in their life. They never left that house. They tweet that.

And then but instantly at the same time you could find other people that were there saying it's two black teenagers. So you could easily look into this and see that like there's some people saying that these are black teenagers. This picture is in video of the immediate aftermath

and you can see this fucking car. All the windows are shot out which would indicate that they weren't rolled down. So you know and then there's people like well maybe they were shooting through their own windows. It's like come on. The fucking chop people are saying oh the car was stolen.

It's like well you don't have any kind of database of stolen cars. You can't kill anyone motherfucker. You're not supposed to just murder people. Also you're like proving the cops. I know. Totally. You know how happy you're setting it. You're setting the moves back. So there's no evidence that there were any kind of fucking guns

in the car whatsoever. And then you know they didn't let detectives in until and no one's talking to cops. And the cops are also dragging their feet and they're like good. There's wait three weeks. The cops want this. Which was like by the way never mind.

I mean it's just like. No it doesn't matter. I don't want to say one way or the other. I don't want to be like oh of course they murdered unarmed black teenagers. Here's what is true. They did shoot a 14 year old black head and a 16 year old black head and it was their police

that did it. Who even is there? Self appointed people. All the complaints are like police don't have enough training over militarized. There's no accountability. So even if these people were shooting and doing all of these things presumably

it's like okay well prove it. Where's your body cam footage. You have an accountability to the public if you expect that from the fucking cops. But I mean here's what's annoying about it is that all these people on the left are ignoring it because it's indefensible and it's wildly fucking hypocritical

to a cartoonish point. So the right's jumping all over it when it's like you could look at that and say yeah here you go this proves that nobody should be a fucking cop. Even the most well we've tried solving the answer with racial identity. You know okay well

let's just have more black cops. It doesn't solve the fucking problem. Okay well how about we have gay, communist, trans, police whatever the fuck this is who have read all the fucking theory who agree with every single woke point there is

and they will appoint themselves police and immediately they murder black teenagers. So the answer is animal form. Once you become a pig. Nobody should have that kind of fucking power. Nobody. Nobody. I think that's a swish Nick.

I don't know if it's a swish. It's definitely something I can raise my voice about. You shouldn't just fucking like cower and everybody did the same shit with fucking Jussie in Covington where it's like this clear thing where like liberals fucked up

and fucking jumped a gun on something. Conservatives happen to be right and then everyone just wants to like oh well we'll just let them well these things where it's like you clearly look like a fucking liar if you got on board with this thing and you're not trying to at least

get in front of it. What even is that shit? It's not like a mate. I mean CNN's not going to fucking cover this. None of it. But the problem is that this kind of shit spreads around fucking Facebook for sure. They're claiming shit like this happens all the time.

Tucker Carlson will absolutely be talking about it. Trump will be talking about it. If he gets fucking wind of this the chop set up their own cops I'm surprised too. I'm pissed chop. They've taken the good name of the best

cooking reality game show there is and a fucking spit on its memory. I'm thinking also you gave me an idea Nick when you were saying that when we go video when we get all our tech set up we should all be wearing bodycams saying go pros multiple

go pros on our person. Actually that's how we should do video as Adam should be on his knees handcuffed and we can have bodycams and full officer out there. Just writing down everything he says on notepads. Hold on earlier you said this and just pointing out inconsistency

and then it ends with me leaning on your neck until you die. It would be funny if we had one fucking camera but we also all had go pros in our helmets and so the viewer could choose if they want stop view, if they want

Adam view. Exactly. They see what we see. And then they could really have the experience of living in our being John Malkovich kind of experience and being on the show. You know if you want to like... We gotta charge $50 a month for that on Patreon. That's extra premium for sure.

I think we're onto something right now. I literally think that would be funny to do. To get bodycams. I'm searching it again dude. I was like glued to Twitter yesterday seeing if anybody's talking about this fucking thing.

I haven't seen it. It's like absurd. If it's as bad as it looks. Right. Which is that CHOP's self-appointed communist protection forces. Murdered a black child and is fucking covering it up.

Murdered a black child, an unarmed black kid and then put a 14 year old in critical condition with gunshot. And then on video you can hear them lighting up the car and then after that the guy says oh you're not dead yet, you want to get pistol whipped and then you can hear him bashing

it up. I'm sure maybe it's not out. But do they think that they were fascist agitators that they were shooting it? I don't think so at all. I think it's people with high tension. They've been carrying rifles around. There was another shooting

where that guy that Brandon Ward else friends with and defended what's his name? James Madison. That guy that Brandon had on his podcast to say that everything he does is right He's just some guy? There's another video of that guy

fucking taking somebody's phone after the last shooting. That one I didn't look at it. Because any of the ones prior to this if there was gang on gang violence or something in Chop that was just pre-existing because that area has that and you can't put that, I mean that's whatever.

This is fucking completely different. Well yeah, it's like anyone that wants to be a cop, even a gay ass communist cop is a piece of shit. I mean you form some kind of hierarchy there. You kick the municipality out of the area. You establish some kind

of fucking government. I don't understand how power is organized in that place but if somebody appointed themself the security chief or whatever and made themself a cop, everyone should just immediately go home. Everyone should immediately go home and go online

and say, hey I was there, we can't do this because psychos came in and made themself a cop. I'm not going to say they're outside agitators from the right. You can draw whatever conclusion you want but this immediately attracted people with guns that think that they're going to be the cops and that's

just going to lead to the same exact problems you already have. That's the way everybody should have handled. But those kind of things always are magnets for crazy people too. Also, the Pacific Northwest has a particularly

cute guy that got murdered in Seattle. I'm pretty sure he was murdered. I was there recently when I was in high school or maybe like 9th grade where I went to Pike's Place Market with my Jewish youth group

and these two homeless guys who were fucking messed out. What kind of field trip is that? What kind of field trip is that? We went to Seattle. The Jewish group are going to go see a live tape.

We're going to go see a live tape in the Frasier. As part of our Jewish cultural heritage we're going to go see the first Starbucks. We're going on a 9 hour trip. We went, yeah, exactly. Dude, so many losers line up for that.

No, so I saw this like, this fucking guy with a fucking steel toad work boots just literally kick the other guy in the temple and there was like a spray. We were lining up for the bus and it was like a bunch of like

14 year old Jewish kids were like girls were crying. It was insane. It was so, yeah, it was what I can close my eyes and still picture it. What the fuck? There's like a thing that naturally happens when it's

like communities that are purported to be like open and liberal there are like, you know people that. Here we go. This is where he turns. The next year on the podcast

you're going to be like, but no, nobody talks about black on black violence. I mean, 13 people were murdered this week and two of them kids. No, in particular, there's like that's right. I guess is what is what

I was I was wrong because I think like the homeless population the homeless population in New York is like way more peaceful than what I what what I've seen is because of retire. Yeah. Hey, I'm fucking living outside.

I'm I'm living outside. I don't push up. Hey, Max. I mean, I mean, pursue it off the sidewalk. Max. Can I have a couple down? Can I have a couple down? He was in the Tenderloin in San Francisco and he saw

this guy in a medical gown like walking on like down the block towards him and it looked like he was licking barbecue sauce off his finger and eating shit. He was eating his fingers off. He was like eating his hands off. Oh my God.

Jesus Christ. What the fuck? I don't know. OK, this is anecdotal. I shouldn't even try to fucking liberal areas. It is true. There is actually people purport to be liberal. They're eating their fingers and stomping homeless guys head

with two toe boots. That is stupid terms, but I've never seen shit like that in New York. I've seen like guys who've crapped themselves and fell asleep on the train, but I've never seen like there seems to be like kind of like a messy violence streak in like the

Pacific Northwest and like Northern California. I would agree with that. There's places that shouldn't exist. The real America is Philadelphia, New York. That's it. Baltimore. Come on man. How dare you erase us?

The United States of America is Philadelphia and New York. Everything outside of that is the fucking Midwest. So true. The Heartland. The Heartland of York, Pennsylvania. They're saying the gyms are going to be closed now in New York till probably next year. Damn. It's like I'm just gonna move to Pennsylvania.

I thought that I thought I'd be like through thick and thin. I'm sticking it out New York but it's like no it's horribly expensive and now there's nothing. It's not like oh well the you're just stuck in your place. Well the city offers zero fucking value now. Right. I kind of like it right now. For what you pay a shit ton of money in rent and then it's like you can't even go to the museum. There's kind of a nice like the very last no I agree. I agree with you there is that right. Took away all of the things. I'll tell you all the culture when I was on fire when I was on Fire Island and I saw all those perfect body. Yes. You keep talking about they they definitely have an underground network of secret

like speakeasy gay gyms. What you need to do Nick is like Al Pacino cruising style. You need to that's your lift and you have to lift it. No I'm just saying I'm trying to go to go to the gym. You know if you know a place around here you work out but you know just what is it meeting up with guys. Yeah. Does he have gay sex in the movie. He I think he gets pretty close but I don't think he I haven't seen that movie since I was like 20. It's it's great. It's a great movie. Yeah. The scene where he I did most of my movie watching in my life when I was 20. And I remember like getting Papa John's and drinking like 13 beers and watching the reason. Yeah. Being like man movies rock. Yeah. No I'm not

obscure shit like this and being able to bring it up drunk instead of having a personality rules. They like got they went into like real gay clubs. I used to watch such all the guys there were like you know like actual guys from leather bars and there's a scene where I guess they used to put poppers on rags and Pacino huffs the rag and then just starts dancing insanely hard. It's it's amazing. Did you ever see Jim Cotta. No Jim Cotta is this fucking dog shit movie that I would get high and watch and then show other people because it's so bad. Right. And then they would be like I can't believe how bad this movie is. Right. And I've watched it probably like 15 times

because you know people because I would show it to people. It's it's it's it's filming in the 80s. The premises they took the real life guy from the Olympics. It was like the American gold medalist gymnast. It's supposed to be a star vehicle for him. But the U.S. government approaches him. He has a different name in the movie. It's like gymnastics karate gymnastics karate. So the U.S. government approaches him. It's a country called Parma Stan that has a nice nice country called Parma Stan that has a game every year which is just a big obstacle course and no one in 200 years has ever won the game. But if they want the U.S. government wants him to win the game. And if he does the king of Parma

Stan will grant any request and their request is to set up like a satellite fucking missile base to threaten the Soviet Union with in Parma. So it's like Ninja Warrior. And then so so but they need him to do it. But he's like all he had the only skill he has is gymnastics so he needs to learn karate. And this is all in the first five minutes. So they bring so he learns karate from literally it's just a Chinese guy with one line of dialogue that has a fucking hawk on his shoulder. And then like a Mr. T knock off and he's just like on monkey bars to a montage of him like doing karate. And he's like and then also the king of Parma Stan's daughter is there the princess of Parma Stan who I guess is working with

the U.S. government. She hot. She's a different race than her father who's played by like an old Jewish man. And she's Thai. And then so like he he you know now that I'm saying all this I'm like fuck I should rewatch. Yeah I'm trying to watch that. Now it's happened again. But the daughter's like helping him sort of. I mean it's not like the movie is like it just makes zero sense. Right. You know. And and so she she's like trying like and again this is the first five minutes before he's gone to Parma Stan because then he has to go to Turkey and sneak into the country and he's immediately being pursued by assassins and that's not really explained why. Awesome. Then he gets to the country and then the obstacle

course is like for a while he's just in the woods and then it but it's a lot of like just gymnastics and karate and he's fighting ninjas. And then there's a guy who's like a bodybuilder that's also a contestant but he's friends with the king. Oh and then he ends up in some like town that's just filled with mentally ill people. So but the so the game is just get you're going through the woods. Yeah. She just running around the woods. How do you win. I have to be the last person that doesn't die. Oh it's like the hunger games. Wow. Yeah and everyone's died. That's got everything. Wow. That sounds awesome. And what was that raised car movie we watched. When he wins when he wins. Does he not. Does he like swerve

at the end and ask for something else. I can't remember because I would always just get like you might know I would get trashed every time I put the movie on and like by the time by the time he ends up to the you know what I might not have seen past the part where he because I swear to God literally it was like drinking. Let's watch. Yeah I definitely and it gets real hazy after the scene where they're in that town with the mentally ill people. It sounds like we got to finish Jim Cotta. Yeah. Well one time I think maybe we're on drugs but you put on the Sylvester Stallone race car movie. Do you remember that. Yeah. Driven. Yeah it's so fun. Yeah the movie's hilarious. It's so fun.

Yeah. That one's great too. You know you got to drive where you drive. Get ahead of the steering wheel. It's a whole man time. You got four wheels. Bullshit. Yeah. He's just like four wheels and then you got on the other ground. Then you got streak. He's an F one driver and like his move is like he always hums to stay. You know they're like listening out on the radio. They're like what's he doing. Like that's how he focuses. Incredible. He's humming. Yeah. Like yeah that's how that's that's his thing. That's his signature. That's how he stays. But he's just doing like fucking like hot laps or whatever around the track. It's not racing and they're like blown away by how good he is at drive. But like

he's a professional driver. I can't imagine anyone working at that level would be like wow this guy's really good at the job. He's paid a bunch of money. And so he throws out like a dime on the fucking track and then picks it up with the tire on the next one. Next lap around a cool trick and because you can turn on a dime literally turn on a dime. That's awesome. It might have been a quarter but I mean it's still like yeah that one's due for a rewatch because the ones that I try to think about movies that I saw when I was like 10 or 11. Yeah. Even at that age I'm like this is fucking this is where the devil's right because if at that age it sticks out in your mind then

you know it's a real piece. Absolutely dude. Yeah. There's a movie I used to watch too. Almost as dumb as Jim Cota called Inner Zone. It's just like Italian Mad Max clone. Fuck yeah. Where but then it's also like stalker kind of but there's like a fucking forbidden zone that you can't go into. Yeah. And this guy has to go into the zone and then like it opens up at this Russian roulette scene but it's like this underground cave where people are drinking poison. Hell yeah. It's this game where you just take shots of like maybe it's poison. This guy that's like the best at the drinking poison rocks. Which is no skill. He just keeps getting

lucky or he's cheating. Yeah. Something like that. He's like a bounty hunter but he has to go into the zone and the zone is controlled by these like these monks but like one's Chinese one's just like a middle aged black guy and it's a white guy and they all like communicate telepathically. So you just hear them. They don't like their mouths don't move. They just fucking like you just hear V.O. like thinking each other. That's awesome. And again this is another movie I watched very drunk. So I got details hazy but I remember one of the monks names is Panasonic I got to get. I got to watch bad movies again. Yeah. I miss it. Life is so much simpler. Oh you suck buddy.

Just getting very stoned and watching awful movies. Yeah. I don't know why I'm so fucking tired almost. Yeah. I got to go to Long Island. Yeah. Here we go. Here's the plot of inner zone. What's in Long Island. Fourth of July. It's July 1st. No. This is a weekend. It's a freaking weekend baby. I'm about to have me some fun. A supernaturally gifted monk Panasonic has sent an incredible mission by his dying master general electric. No. Shut up to protect the inner zone. The last fertile region left on a post apocalyptic. OK. Cool. Against an invading gang of wasteland raiders. Is it along the way Panasonic is helped by Swan a roguish road warrior who seeks a rumored treasure hidden within the inner zone and Tara an attractive

slave girl who swan falls in love with the raiders are meanwhile led by Mantis a female bodybuilder dominatrix and her sadistic partner. Balkazan after the defeat of the raiders Swan locates the treasure which is revealed to be a fallout shelter turned archive of some of mankind's greatest achievements. Then are various items such as book sculptures paintings along with Panasonic brand video cassette recorder that plays a final message from those who preserve the artifacts before the you've got to be kidding me. Is it a tie in with the Panasonic Corporation. Well yeah I mean that's why the monks name is Panasonic because the monks are ancient monks but they get their names from the bullshit that's in the fall

for the the bomb. Yeah. Is there one named cock pump. There's a guy named rabbit dildo is another movie. Yeah. So the list of those the best of the because you know we've talked about stone cold and shit like that. Yeah. Killer B killed is a great movie. So in that genre I'm trying to think of just a really shitty fucking action movies. I used to be able to rattle off a list of like 10 of them. I used to watch a lot of like all the no retreat no surrender. Yeah. I used to watch a lot of Dolph Lundgren stuff with my dad growing up because you guys both liked his body like his body. Yeah. The American series. That's it. That's an absolute necessary watch. Damn. I haven't watched most of these. Yeah. Those

are cannon films. What's that cannon films cannon films like a company. Yeah. They would just release like bullshit fucking action. That sounds awesome. Yeah. That sounds freaking awesome might. Damn. Maybe I'll smoke some CBD. Yeah. Put the phone down and watch watch all the no retreat no surrender. That's what we got to do. Just be 40 smoke our fake leave. Watch movies that remind us when we were nine years old. Watch movies that remind us of when we were 19 and doing the exact same thing with real weed. Yeah. Sounds good to me. Mate. Oh fuck. All right. Well thanks for listening everyone. Listen to Stibby solves your problems if you'd like. Got a one hot one Friday. T shirts come dot town. There's

T shirts. New ones are up the top. You click the menu. You can go to catalog and you can see all of the shirts available at the same time because you can.