The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - Ep. 302 – Bathroom Break

Episode Date: March 9, 2022

tom of fidance

We'll just jump right into that riff you guys. Yeah, we got a nice little we're looking a little Tom of Finland Of course, and just the idea that he just sits around drawing this shit all day, but they're not laughing. Yeah He's just like yeah, that was a good one. Yes next drawing Fireman very large penis. What is he Danish? I don't know that they all talk that way basically Tom of Finney's finish Oh interesting as in please finish in my ass What do you look like? How do you get his start? Whoa? Just a regular guy. This is like Vincent Price. He does Honestly if Vincent Price could draw it's a possibility. He would draw shit like that, right? He's gay as hell. Yeah, I

Love that the guys are just always hard. They're always hard They're always hard we're have like and their balls are high up. Yeah, sometimes they have high up balls This guy has high balls. Yeah, but I've seen high balls on a lot of Tom of those guys got great Because they will to be fair though. There's they're wearing leather pants. So I guess your nuts could sit Up in them weird. It's a possibility Yeah So it's also too. It's like I have no idea whether like if you tell me this is an authentic Tom of Finland or just some retarded 13 year old from DeviantArt

I would have no idea. It would be hard. Tom of Finland you could tell from the Strokes I say I I would love to actually do that challenge I would love to be presented with ten Tom's of Finland and ten Copycats. Yeah, this one. I feel like if things look shiny then, you know, it's his he's got a little he loves sheen He knows how to make us like a shininess. Yeah Tom of Finland turns a hot. How the fuck did this guy live to a hundred dude? No, he's he's he died at 71 Maybe just the style the drawings probably turn 71 is still good. You know for a fact. He died at 71 looking at his wick computer. I know, okay

Well, let's read it. I just want to know how he got into drawing. Oh, come on Adam. Let's tell us about it I want to learn. I'm sure our listeners want to learn about Tom of Finland too. Don't you guys? They want to hear? Talk about cool shit like Elden ring What's that? I don't know. It's a new video game. I'm just playing. It's is it is it like hard Zelda? That's what it looks like. Honestly, don't don't know. Don't care. Wow Why I don't I never gave a fuck about that world of Warcraft shit, dude I'll play cool games like Red Dead like Red Dead Cowboys race cars All right, sports fucking Mario Party Mario Party. It's a fucking it's very social party

We did play Mario Party for a while there Yeah, we have a lot of fun even attempting to knock Mario Party as if that's like not one of the least gay games of all time I did not I have a competitive spirit He's you fucking bitch. I have a competitive spirit. He's you fucking whore This is me at the Black Lives Matter protest. Oh, wow What is that guy? Where's that guy's cock? Is it that big where I'm trying to tell where his cock is I don't know a lot of them have something in their back pocket that looks like a frisbee. Yeah, but you know what? I think it is. I think you know what? I think it's like so there's the dick. He's going back. No, he's a oh, I see

He's jacking off. He's ejaculated. Oh, and then there's a bubble of so much that it's filled up his Got like a balloon of cum and then they're just kind of rubbing each other I don't think they're just having a kind of chat real quick Oh, but the guy's jacking. He's like, so you you take the other guy's cock. You take care of the horses is right there Oh, look at this guy's got a pin and it's a cock He's got a pin on his fucking collar and I thought it was like, you know gonna be like Air Force or something But it's a cock. That's a great touch that I really respect Tom It's the details where you could tell that it's it's an authentic top. Yeah, that retard from Deviant Art wouldn't be

Oh, wow, look at this. It's more of like kind of a Norman Rockwell Bob. Yeah. Yeah, the Saturday evening post Yeah, it really is you can see the top of the guy's cock. You very rarely I guess I won't say rarely, but you see that's an artful way. Wait, is that a woman? Oh, no, it's a guy. What do you mean? Is that a woman? I thought it looked like tits for from the far away His shoulder looked like tits. So basically, so I guess for this is what I found on wikipedia Basically, if you were gay the way you could like look at hot guys were to buy magazines called physique magazines Which were just gay magazines, but they didn't say they were gay. They said they were for working out. They were for yeah For yeah, so similar to what bodybuilding forums are now. Yeah, kind of words like guys that don't want to admit

They're gay. They talk about each other's bodies and how good they oh, they talk about a lot of exception of Misk on the bodybuilding forum, which is one of the well, I guess you could say that's sort of like that That was like the ball scene of early internet Yeah, like Paris is burning the Misk forum. That would be that's as gay as the internet guy I agree with that. There's a really good for bodybuilding forum post about why Salmon Rushdie gets hot chicks and they are furious Oh, dude, this one's awesome. Let me see. They're two soldiers. You're not allowed to see I want to see the strong guy. I will I will listen. I it's good that you can see them because our listeners can't see it either Yeah

It's called okay It's actually called manpower for sale on art space if you guys want to check it out not you Adam not you I'm not gonna look at promise. I'm reading all the guy in the back. It's awesome It's two army guys. They're wearing pith helmets One of them has his ass out who actually I would say probably looks like the manlier one He actually is the bottom and he's getting fucked in his ass and he's looking back like like thanks for covering me chief Like he's got a real manly look back. Yeah, and the other guy's fucking his ass He's got his hand up his shirt. That's actually gayer than putting his dick in his feeling up his tits

He's feeling his tits while he's got his Fucking the other guy in the ass and then far in the background. There's a guy who's a guy who's jacking off But it's awesome. He's holding his balls with one hand and jacking his dick with the other Which is an awesome move Sometimes I will admit sometimes I jiggle my nuts when I really want to get her tonight. Whoa, that is a humongous penis I want to see this one's awesome. This one's called Tom's Rockwell for sale and it's a cop with What looks to scale to be about I would say a 36 inch penis That's the length and width I would say it's about a foot across and a guy a guy's putting his mouth on

One quarter of the guy's dick head and just slurping it like it's a soup dumpling Tom rules, dude Now do you think Tom started drawing so he could jack off this? Whoa, there's a woman in this Yeah, the art. This is now great here. We go now We finally found a way out of this a way to be annoyed the artists agree created Tom of Finland's drawing for women get the We can't have anything right. We can't have fucking anything just for the guys So annoying you want to be involved in Tom of Finland to but here's how stupid women are. Yeah, right It's like Tom of Finland like it doesn't obviously. Yes. It's like cops and stuff

Yeah, but it's like these ideas of authority or whatever and then subverting them by making them homosexuals and supergate Yeah, and now it's some dumb moron fucking live woman comes by and goes but aren't cops bad Why would gay why would gay want to be caught because of that? I'm using my my my woman brain to come up with why Tom of Finland is bad And so I made it but this time the cop is tied up and it says I'm a fascist pig Are you serious? Yeah, it's fascist right on the pan. Keep your politics. This is away from our muscles Politics in there already. It's just but it's also like Ben Garrison. This is like it's also like oh You know, it's really good art when you literally have to write your fucking message

Shut up you dumb bitch. Tom did it with cum. Yeah, and you couldn't even do it with words So basically, I guess this was the way but I don't understand Whatever, but he got into it as a way around the censorship codes Because overt gay acts were legal so So the magazine what are they claiming that what he is? He'll do disgusting You just fucking sprayed you're so gross dude. I'm sitting here literally looking at gay porn

Yeah, and then I'm like this is interesting and then I look over you and I'm disgusted disgusted how much you're sneezing I'm disgusted at you the way you fired off not We're like just wiping it on you know, there's a cat in this house I know so take a fucking Ben and drill you come over here. He gets not gonna go to sleep All over me for the show. We're trying to just look at that's not a big deal. We're trying to watch gay porn together Describe it interrupt it wait So I guess are they yeah So that these magazines were dedicated to physical fitness and health and it was often the only connection between closeted men and their

Sexuality interesting. So maybe that's why gay guys all are jacked now. It's vestigial You had to be jacked to be able to look at you know gay porno And and meet up with guys to work out Maybe they didn't want to be so jacked, but now it's like yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah, he was a he was a He worked at an ad agency So he was a commercial artist But then he also ran a small mail order business directly distributing reproductions of these hot drawings That's awesome to the to the guys that one of them dude imagine

Imagine for pornography being like I hope my Tom of Finland picture comes in so I can check off today and then in 62 there was a Supreme Court case between manual Enterprises and day versus day and they ruled that nude male photographs were not inherently obscene So soft court gay pornography magazines and films Became very popular. That's awesome. Mm-hmm Even though I disagree with them I guess I don't yeah, so I guess that I'm infuriated

But what why isn't there Tom of Finland for women? I mean shut up bitch? Shut the fuck up That is that is infuriated. Yeah, I gotta go now. I'm gonna have to look at so much gay porn to get over it This one that's a classic the cowboy one. Yeah, Bo Butler 40% off for new subscribers Yeah, that's awesome, dude. Yeah How much cock do you think Tom got probably probably never had sex? Yeah, he's just that's why he put it all into his drawings Where you can imagine oh This guy kind of looks like me that one's graphic. I mean he just has a mustache. No, he looks like me

Well, his dick isn't I can see his dick with the naked eye. So that's one big difference. Yeah Well, hold on. I mean, you know that guy could be You think I could be this big? That's true If that if that entire man is only 12 inches tall, then I'd say the dick is accurate. No. Yes Yes, that what I'm saying is I love this to another dick. I mean the dick is the little details with Tom He never he never loses an opportunity to fucking Just jam a cock somewhere. It doesn't belong That's the best part about it. It's also this guy's got like spine of Bifford. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. His spine is all fucked up

Yeah, but this is that awesome cock just from the off screen like it's the it's the fucking boom Mike. Yeah Yeah, fuck yeah, what's even going on? Can you just can you Adam? Can you see if Tom of Finland ever had sex? I'm gonna look it up Okay, what does it say? Oh, he died from smoking six emphysema dude. Everybody used to smoke six though Well, he beat eight. Yeah, there's you had like see there's one drawing with a guy with a normal sized dick And I thought it was a vagina for a second. Yeah Program now, right? There's so many of these pictures. I will say he's not doing great for You know male self-image. He had a lot of round that guy's He had a life partner

He had a life partner who's a dancer. Wow, and they shared their life together for 28 years until his death in 1981 Dude, that's gay guys they get to just all fuck each other constantly even when they're all look at those nips Yeah, this one's a good one. That one's really good the water balloon cock Yeah, the soft but humongous cock and the fucking double pierced nipples It's like haircut just that dreamy pouty fucking lips. Yeah. Yeah, dude Tom of Finland comes to Japan. Let's see. Is it time to read an after this was his partner? This is the guy who's married to south bottom of Finland Let me see no, he's not that hot I think that's great

Top bottom we're both work both ways top of Finland bottom of Finland Look this guy's dick is in balls are in jail They've chained it at the balls. Yeah, that looks really pain. No, but they all have they all have this weird lump Yeah, what is the back lump? I don't know what the fuck that is, but that's in a lot of them You think it's not condoms because they're all raw dogging. Yeah, it's definitely not. Maybe it's a bottle of lube Dude, his dick isn't so much pain those balls look like they're about to pop But again, just like this if I drew this by the time I got that when I'm getting to the expression Right, right, right the shading fucking I'm weak. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm fucking crying

If I was drawing this just having the idea you start you start laughing. Yeah, just hyper ventilating and Yeah, just every bit. Yeah, but sounds like yeah, nothing This is awesome. Yeah, this is good art This is my art Did he do any fine art? No, I don't think so. No, he did like That's awesome. He worked at an ad agency and then he got into drawing hot guys Do we know what he was his passion? He was doing it on the side Well, what was do we do we know any of his like, you know, do you have any lucky strikes ads or did he have any like?

Yeah, you know oatmeal ads. Did he like sneak a cock into any? Yeah, it'd be great if there was like one guy that like people this was a secret life And then it turns out he did Tony the tiger And it's too late now to get rid of Tony. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah We can go to the Tom of Finland Foundation. Let's do it, dude. Where is it? Well, there's some rare interracial next to the Anne Frank house, you know, I will say Not seen enough men of colors huge cocks here Tom. I'm looking like I really need to learn You need to learn but isn't it living America on the front page of the website? There's a drawing of a black guy with a

Pretty beefy car. Yeah, but that's them. That's the foundation. They're trying to put a spin on blackwashing Yeah, they're trying to like, you know They just found like, you know, they're basically like highlighted the one black. Oh, that is so awesome Subpassionate kiss. Yeah, both their humongous floppin the victory over Japan day Yeah. Okay. So if we go, we could go to LA to his home. Oh, shit. Yeah. Does he have a museum or something? He's got his boyfriends. You could visit Tom house. That's cute. That's awesome. Oh, and he's also the other guys reading too. That's very literate. Yeah. So I guess the Tommy, you know, it'd be great if they, you zoom in and there's just the same Yeah, that's right. It goes on forever. Yeah. So I guess it's an LA at the

Yeah, it's it's a Wow The lump I'm really confused by he has it everywhere. I don't understand what it's supposed to be. It's something from John Dude, that guy's So huge, like I love at a certain point. He just went so buck wild with it where it's like your dick is just just at your fucking nipples. That guy's dick is in the middle of his sternum respect. So weird. It says like directions to get to his house, but it gives you bus directions and they're super detailed. We'll read them for anyone who's in Los Angeles. So if you're in Los Angeles, you go to

Sorry, I'm just scrolled past it. The bus stop is sunset Echo Park. They're serviced by the Metro bus lines four and seven Oh four and two. Also the 603 to Alvaro sunset. Continue on sunset Boulevard to La Veta Terrace and then up the short hill and up to the up the grand stairs until the Veta Terrace levels out on another half a block. These are so detailed. Tom house is on your left. The house is only a point three mile walk from the bus stop. It only gives you bus directions. It's so weird. Well, dude, they don't need the traffic, you know, you know how many fucking they read that many vestors parked outside of the house. The address. I mean, like people can look it up. Oh, an elephant ripping guys clothes. But you can't really see his penis ripping a clown's clothes off. That's interesting. He got into the clown shit too. Oh, there's there's the Saturday. This one is honestly my favorite one. It's so cute. It's so cute and like I think the guy

having his dick and balls put in jail is probably yeah, that one's pretty good. Oh, physique pictorial. I see he got it. I'm really upset. I can't see it. It looks like this one is so awesome. Can I see this guy is reverse cowgirl mouth fucking a different guy. No, Nick, please. I want to see. You can't see. It's fair. You're on the chair. I want to see the hot guy. You ruin it. You get your plane about Steven and ruin it. I didn't complain about him. I said I got mad at him because I wanted to finish my beer. Yeah, that's a classic a classic mover. You pretend the store. You just change your tune midway through a story. I got mad based on the when I said it wasn't funny or something. What did I say? I don't fucking know or who cares. I don't know. All right. Anyway, so then I went to Google Street Views to look at Tom from Finland's house. What does it say? It's got tall hedges around the house. You can't even see it. Wow. What the

fuck? Why do they tell you to go there? Oh, but you can call for an appointment. But like, oh, cool. You ever go to Dan Zig's house in LA? No. It's where he's got all his books. Yeah, welcome my book election. All right. Wait, what are the hedges look like good look like Cox? No, they're square. Unfortunately. But he's got motorcycles there. It's pretty cool. Of course he does. You probably bet on that, you know. Yeah, you could bet on where you bet on. You could bet on whether Adam has beaten off my my bussy dot ag my bussy my bussy dot ag Adams my bookie my bookie dot ag my bookie dot ag not to be confused with my bussy dot ag. That's Adam's website. My bussy dot f ag. I'm reading a review of the Tom. Okay, let's hear it. This guy's mad. Why are you I spoke to something. That's me. Don't use your real voice. Use your broadcasting voice. I spoke to someone over

the phone this afternoon about my experience. Make it sound like a different guy. Don't use your regular voice and make it sound like a different maker. You sound like you're doing this guy. No, like a gay voice. No, don't use your voice. I said, yeah, don't talk like a differently than you normally do. I spoke to someone over the phone this afternoon. No, don't do a racist impression of a black person. No, I'm trying to do Morgan Morgan Freeman. Yeah, it's a racist impression. It's not racist. I'm trying to honor the great actor Morgan Morgan Finland. The police officers cocking balls ran all the way up. The first time I saw Andy Dufresne leather daddy prison. Dude, this is such a long review. Well, we have time. I spoke to someone over the phone. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, save it till after we talk about my bookie dot ag. One of the

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Sam Aril. If you love this league, this league, this league. So yeah, my bookie dot a G come down, come down 20. Bet your money. You'll make more money. It'll be fun. And you can fucking do casino shit from your phone. Another thing I would suggest you guys do is the tour is mostly wrapped up at this point. Thank you for everybody who's come to see me on the road. I'm going to be in St. Louis tomorrow, Thursday. We added a late show. The early show sold out Chicago. I'm pretty sure everything is sold out. Maybe I can add an early show like a brunch show Saturday or Sunday. I don't know yet. Probably not. But just look out maybe if you're a fucking dumb but you didn't get tickets. And then I apologize. I had to

cancel some shows for some family shit, but I will still be in Atlanta the first and the second of April and hot Atlanta brother. I'm going to be in Toronto on the 16th Providence the 28th through the 30th Washington DC, the DC improv 12th through the 15th and Philadelphia. That's fun. Yeah. The Philadelphia the 16th to the 18th of June. I want to do the DC improv. Yeah, I've only worked that club one time. Really that one time where you lost your pants. I forgot my pants. Chinese girl in the woods. I remember that like it was yesterday. We really have been friends for a long time. Yeah. Our lives lost my pants. You were homeless basically. Have a fucking Chinese bitch. You didn't have a place to take

a lady. How did you even she didn't even talk that much English, right? No, she spoke English. Oh, I thought you said I thought you painted it as she was like, but she also went to a park to fuck Nick. Yeah. I mean, she wasn't. Yeah, she didn't have his broad daylight. I was like, yeah, I don't like my stuff with me. What is going on in this bitch's life that she just fucks a drifter outside? Well, women are truly pathetic. Anyway, I used to be handsome. No, I mean, you're handsome, but you're like shit. I'm going to I'm at the age now where I'm going to start doing the thing. I used to be a really hot guy in their middle age. I used to love me. I was a hot guy. I was a hot

piece of ass. But still, there's got to be some wrong with this woman to fuck. I mean, like it's be one thing if you fucked her in your hotel room. Yeah, that's different, but you're outside. I went down there without a plan. I was like, I'm just going to fuck my way through the weekend. Yeah. And then one woman outside and she's like, no, you can't stay with me. I'm like, well, can I fuck you? I honestly respect for even having the goal to ask that question. That really is where that's I got to get. I got to tip my hat to that one happened. Maybe we could find the public restroom and it's not even like night, right? Like I've I've fucked in a field when you're drunk and it's like

this is the mid sober Lee 11 11 47 a.m. There's a guy going for a run. We left from Starbucks. Yeah, some fucking some fucking lobbyist is fucking running by making sure the little game cancer. That's Pam. What's up with her? You guys keep in touch? No, never you should. You should hit her up. I'm going to be in DC. She's listening to me. Stop it. That business last door for tickets. You know, oh, and also subscribed to my YouTube. I'm putting a lot of shit on there now. I'm going to release my special there probably in April. But yeah, go to my YouTube channel. I'm releasing a lot more stand up there and on my Instagram, tick tock all that shit. I'm doing stand up again

to I got to do that because I got to do something for money. So I will be at Caroline's I think June 23rd through 26. Nice. New York area went by tickets and then I got another stuff. I'm probably going back to Lincoln Lodge. Most importantly, I probably if I'm on if I'm anywhere on the East Coast, I will have them. But if you were in New York City, and you would like to buy one of the new run, I got I got a sample shipment of prints from a high quality print shop of the crumb from my real monsters holding his balls over his head. I got a couple of those that I'm selling. Yeah, you come to Nick's house and now come to funny moms. I'll sell me funny. Okay,

that sounds good. Anyway, nice and funny moms is happening the first month, the not the first month of the month, but it's it's back and they've been fun so far. Bring cash and if you buy a shirt you get in free. No, you don't. What do you mean? I've not taken a dime from the show. Well, I've offered you every have some money. You're going to make way more money than we will from selling shirts shirts. Yeah, you'll do fine. Um, so let's read this gay guys. Oh, yes. Thank you. You said a promo code. Yes. It was come town or come town 20. You were thinking about those drawings. No, I was thinking about Bram Stoker's Dracula. I haven't seen that in so long time. It's

not good, dude. I rewatch it like once a year and I'm like, fuck, yeah, Dracula. That's not good. That's with Gary Oldman, right? Yeah, Gary Oldman and Keanu Reeves and it's a nice cast. Angela Stachett. You know what? I watched that Bassett. Angela Statham. Yeah, I watched it. You know what? I watched it as a youth in Eldis's family's home on Patterson Park Street or it was right by Patterson. It was a cross from Patterson Park in his little his little Albanian fucking like two two bedroom apartment that him, his parents, his grandma and his sister all shared with their cat. It's a good time. Yeah. And then brand and then we got on that and then

we got on Ellis's dial up internet connection. Eldis actually had internet before me. Yeah, if you can believe it. Cram Stoker. Cram Stoker's Tom of Finland. Ham Smokers. That's the movie I want to see. Cram Stoker's Tom of Finland. Francis Ford Coppola presents Tom of Finland. Sorry, Gary Oldman. Do you want to go to jail? Is that what you want to do? Get your fucking hands up against the tree. What's the Godfather? Oh, the Godfather. But I'm just a motorist. All right, I'll coax and settle down. The guy that use your settle down calm down. Think about what you want to say. Go ahead. The guy, the guy that

wrote the one star review of the Tom of Finland's museum. He's written one other review and it's a one star review of a dollar tree. I'm going to get stars. I'm going to get stars tattooed on the side of my cock, but so it's like one star, two stars, and then a half a star at the top. Okay, so it's like two and a half stars. Yeah, yeah. So wait, wait, your balls are, I'm sorry, the first stars or your balls are on the shaft. Yeah, so you get measured by a star rating. By a star system. Two and a half stars. But you can make a star as big as you want. I know I'm being, I'm being modest. That's awesome. Yeah, that's

just maturity right there is maturity. So, so his other review is of this dollar tree and it's now you know people are going to find this game and then and and say Adam free. His name, his name is Nick Mullen, but he said that easily. Look at how many reviews of the Tom of Finland house could possibly. Okay, fine, but he put it on. You read it. You read it. It's too late now. It's too late. So we might as well wait. Okay, listen, it's a it's something that supposedly cares so much about the worker. This guy's probably a waiter at a ball. That's true. This guy. No, this guy quite literally does not care about the workers.

Okay, let's hear about it. But at the dollar tree, he was he literally gave the time that he was there. That's awesome. But he he was complaining that to the cashier that they weren't following the six foot distance protocols. Hell yeah. And that's dollar tree and she was rude to him. Oh my God. We she was rude to him and he was he's a he's writing this review to say how dangerous an unprofessional it was. And then this motherfuckers going to gay drawing museum during the height of the pandemic. They didn't follow the six foot rules. I was trying to go see men's drawings. Okay, listen, this review is which is

essential during the pandemic. Absolutely. That's Los Angeles in a nutshell. I spoke to anything else about a dollar tree California, the state that loves the pandemic. Everybody needs to be locked inside, except for the homosexual population who thinks it's okay to go to the Tom of Finland Museum while people are dying. What happened? I thought this was a deadly pandemic. Okay, there's a little bit more truth to the bug chasing accusations. Did he really want to get AIDS? Maybe he was trying to get HIV, just like the drug peddling HIV addicted male prostitute George Floyd, who died while

committing a felony and he deserved to. Sean Hannity is next. Thank you, Tucker. Beautiful night tonight. Speaking of penis drawings, I'm looking at Donald Trump's cock right now and it's gorgeous. Joe Biden could never have a penis. It's so beautiful. It's small. Even when drawn. We've got Peter Ducey on Peter. You're a beautiful little baby boy. I want to kiss you all over your face. Great questions today. Super fucking good questions. Jen Sackie is a bitch who deserves to be raped for even daring. I'll tell the audience right now. I've known Peter since he was a little boy. I remember watching his father

change him. I've seen his penis as well. It's awesome. It was great. Even as a baby, he had one of the best penises I've ever seen. Peter, thanks for joining us. Do you think President Biden is a faggot? And explain to what degree of a faggot you think he is? Thanks, Sean. I do. Coming up, we got Louis Gomez. That's gonna be so awesome. Louis, yeah. I would love for Louis to make a full pundit. Louis, if you saw President Biden right now, would you bend him over and fuck him in the ass? Oh, I don't know if I do that. Get the fuck off my show.

Get off my show. You're wrong. You're wrong. I'm not gonna hear it. You're wrong. Lib. Louis J Gomez. Louis J Gomez. You're too afraid of cancel culture. I call him to rape Joe Biden. Some of us aren't afraid. Louis J Gomez. Oh, fuck. Okay. I'm on pins and needles here. Okay. I want to know what this fucking guy said. I spoke to someone over the phone this afternoon about my experience at the Tom of Finland store and the customer service at the store. I wanted to make sure that the information I gave and the horrific experience I had

gets the in the right hands and dealt with immediately. What is going on? These are homosexuals in America. Demanding back in June. I placed an order for a book forever, but when I placed the order was listed as a stock when the order process was then listed as a preorder when I cleared. I when I when I made it clear through the emails with the store that I wasn't that it wasn't clear that it was a preorder through emails with customer service. I was told that I would have forever, but by the way, this is not even a Tom of Finland.

The book. No, it's just gay porn. A book of gay pornography, writing a review about it rocks. It's got a hundred and eleven five star. What are these guys doing? Gymnastics? They're gymnastics. They're Cox touching. No, I don't know. Cox aren't even out. Interesting. Their Cox aren't even out. They don't even have their Cox. Their Cox aren't even out through emails with customer service. I was told that the book would be sent to me by August 2020. Following that email, I continued to reach out to them with my concerns. No reply on their end. I even check their website to my surprise. The item

isn't even sold anymore. I was never notified of anything. No one ever reached out to me to initiate a refund when they clearly this guy's name. Let's put them on blast. What's what's what? What is the date of this review? Make a mullin. What is the date? Okay. So he's no, no, no, what is the date? I need to know whether it was a year ago during the pandemic or yes. Yes. He fucking he went there in 2020. He went to the Tom. You gotta fucking kidding me. Fuck this fucking Cox. I mean, you know, not actual. That's not what we're bad at. That's cool that he does. That

part's fine. But this fucking piece of shit. I'm more mad that he lives in California to be honest with you. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Gay people used to be cool. What is how much does this book cost? By the way, look at my check right now. Okay. To be to fucking tattle on somebody. I was never notified of anything. No one ever reached out to me to initiate a refund. Yeah. I sent a dispute with my credit card company and started running into troubles this morning. I called the store to make sure that this item would be cancelled and my money would be refunded to me since I have never and not received it

seven months later. I spoke to someone by the name of Joachim and Dresden. They were beyond rude and Dresden used foul language towards me. You know, I will say it's kind of hard to find where to get it. It's not available. It's rare. Very rare. It's hard to get a hold of. If you would like a copy, come to Funny Moms. I have an extra. Oh, wait a second. There's never mind. You can get anything. You can get a used copy of for now. Oh, wait, no, this is different. You can get something called banish your butt. But not forever. But I want to be. I want to eat forever. Now, and Dresden

used foul language towards me at an extreme attitude and hung up the call. Now that is not acceptable at all in caps. I am a customer. First of all, I paid for an item I never received and they don't even sell it anymore. So of course I am beyond entitled to a full refund and at least an apology for the inconvenience yet none of that happened. I am beyond furious with my experience and I believe someone would run. I can't believe someone would run a business like this. I really hope someone. I see numerous people wrote some terrifying reviews about not refunding and unprofessional

behavior, terrifying, and it really hurts the reputation of the foundation and horrifying, horrifyingly discussed it to know that a company representing foundation speaks to customers with swearing words like fucking pussy. He called this man a fucking pussy. That's fucking awesome and and accusing they that this isn't he is bad. He made a type of dramatically incorrect. They have no responsibility as an online store to make sure that ship items ordered or to check the status to make sure customers who ordered the items get the items for the money they pay and this is

sickening. The experience was nothing but horrific and I would never recommend anyone to use the Tom of Finland online store or culture edit for any purchase. Horrific. Okay, whatever. That's it. Yeah, fuck this guy. Yeah, and he's here is ratting on a blonde cashier at Dollar Tree. Yeah, let's hear it during the pandemic. Social distancing between customers is required and the cashier with long blonde hair who worked at the store on January 28th around 2 30 p.m. Did not try to follow this is socially distancing rules and force the customers to check out faster and it was dangerous and

unethical. We requested the died smoke.com. Yeah, we requested the manager take a look at the female cashier who refused to follow the pro call and and was rude and forced the customers to check out faster by not falling six foot distance rules between the previous customer and who. Wow, that's crazy. That guy needs to smoke or eat some gummies some delta from delta diet smoke. You got you got dbc gummies from this company diet smoke.com. You listen to the gene gene the nebulae Italian brought to you by diet smoke.com. I love diet smoke because it's got

everything. It's got Italian. It's got Elvis. It's got New York. It's got three things everyone loves. You know, the gummies. So if you teeth are mostly, you know, you got dentures. Guess what? Guess what you're having for lunch diet smoke. You can also swallow them whole if you really you can swallow them whole. It's about getting Italian style. Yeah, the way you're dead. You see pork medallions and drop them in your gullet. We died of a heart attack at age 27. Right before your 12th birthday. Italian working class dad who made table claws. Everybody see everybody back in those days lived in graves and

the entire country. Everybody was Italian. They were all Elvis. They lived in graves and everybody's dad made made red and white checker print. That's right. And they all come home after a hard day of work and they play accordion for 15 hours straight until it was time to go back to work and naturally lack of sleep took a toll on his cardiovascular health and it killed over an art attack age 27. Now you were the head of household. It's 12. You start having a sex with your mom. Oh, you have to have to the man of the house or else it puts you a close up. Well, she had the

biggest most beautiful tits in South Brooklyn. It's called the diets. The queen of diet smoke. Why they call that who gives a fuck. Go to diet smoke.com. Find out and she answers there. Yeah, the fuck because if you didn't fuck up somebody else was going to tell you fuck that bitch. And that's that's how you want your dad from heaven looking down on some fucking other mook. You want fucking your mother. You want your dad up there with his fucking accordion playing the sweetest song St. Peter's ever heard in his fucking stupid fucking life. And somebody and he looks down his

wife's lubed up with olive oil getting every crevice every fold centrally fucked. And it ain't his son's cock. It's a stranger. Yeah, a fucking stranger. That's the history of palm restaurant. Right. That's what I always imagine. Anytime I've been there. I've never been there. It's pretty good. Where's palm? It's a steakhouse. No parm parm parm. Oh, not not the where is parm. They're all over. There's a couple. There's one in city field. So how interesting. Yeah, they're pretty good. Okay. It's pretty good. Yeah. Not as good as diet smoke. Not as good

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the family. That's right. That's right. Holographic every every single diet smoke package comes with the now defunct dream cast and you put in a you put in a disc and it's actually Sonic Spanish. It's Sonic having sex with your neighbor as a child. Yeah, that's right. And check it out. Yeah, die smoke.com. It's all from America. Yeah, for Texas style discounts promo code. Come down or come down 20 and you're going to get a great deal. They'll send you a lasso that's been in a feel like Aaron Lopez when you use that promo code and you say I'm getting all this stuff for free. What do you

got? African slaves working there. Right. Get this for free and listen to Sunday's episode to hear learn about Aaron Lopez. Aaron Lopez. Yeah, slash come town. Aaron Lopez was a famous social these moaks open my comedian podcast. Aaron Lopez who conveniently moved in and out of being Hispanic whenever he was a Jew. Yeah, that's another interesting. He was a Jew first and foremost. We can all. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And so they got two great flavors also. That's awesome. Blue raspberry and watermelon. I love it. One of their flavors is Intamin's double rich chocolate donuts. They

licensed that. That's so good. All right. That's on there, right? Yeah. Okay. And they have their website has a blog and you can read that too. Do we have any new reviews from because sometimes we get some really great reviews. Yeah, you'll you'll love it so much yourself. They say delta eight delta eight my pussy. I had such a good time shooting these gummies. Delta eight my pussy. You might as well say delta eight my as well and check out promo code come town or come town 20 not yee haw. Not which I'm just I'm getting word now from our producer that yee haw is not defunct as a promo code. It's come

town or come town 20. Wow. And I'm getting word from our producer who's really hot has big kids that she wants to fuck me and I'm going to let her but she's got to be quiet about it because you guys because Nick and Adam are going to be jealous. Well, now that Corona is over, I'm ready to go on some sex tourism. Oh, yeah. Where you going? Southeast Asia. No, I think I want to start with with Western Europe. Okay. The colonization take that tour. Yeah. Okay. So I'm going to Britain. Okay. I'm going to paint. I'm going to do myself up Muslim style. I'm going to get it's going to be me a couple other

packies. And we're going to run a little ring. You know, we're going to find a couple of working class teenage girls and run a little ring for a while. Okay. And when the police you talk about you're going to sex traffic women in England. Yeah, teenage girls. Okay. And when the police show up, they just say like, I don't know what race or something. Oh, no, I definitely not sir. Cheerio. You think that'll work? I think that does work. So they are that because you're the colonized and they're the colonized from what I've read online. Right. That seems to be and to be clear just so I'm clear you're

it's going to be you two Pakistani men. You're going to be in brown. I think it's got to be a whole crew of Pakistani guys. Okay. So how many? I don't know. I think there's like usually 15 of them 15. You read brown. It's all guys that go in together on a lease on a Toyota Corolla. And they all drive it on Lyft. And then and then they get like wayward kind of slags. I guess you call them slag chavs. Yes, like slags are like whores. Yeah, just I'm a man. I don't know. Like I imagine like fucking like those those British girls that wear sweatpants and then they're like, you know, like Air Force ones with

springy kind of yeah, that's a kind of girl. And then they look pregnant. But they're not chavs. This bitch with the big eyebrows and all the all the bronzer. Yeah, like a British chola. That's what I'm saying. They really do look so fucked up. Yeah, disgusting. Yeah. It's it's a horrific looking people. That's the thing. People got all up in arms. You're like, oh, he's Becky's are ruining these bitch girls. You know, they're raping him and having it and there's no accountability. And it's like that's probably the pinnacle of those girls lives. First of all, the British gene pool needs a

little mixing up. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, because they all look like dogs to be chained to a to a to a twin bed frame from World War two in a in a in a in a like what are they called council flat? You know, somewhere in some state council estate, some town that hasn't seen fucking daylight Manchester. Yeah, since before the industrial revolution. Yeah. You know, what the fuck was you think what you think she's going to be Elizabeth Hurley? Right? You think she's going to be fucking spice? We think she's going to be the queen of England. And wrong. You guys are got rules for that. Yeah, maybe in America

she was born. She could become Queen England. She's hot enough. She's hot suits. We don't have room if the prince happens to see her on a TBS. We procedural show. We got a little bit called meritocracy here. Yeah, you know, we got plenty of Muslims. Show me one instance in which they're creating a sex gang sex rape ring. Wait, do they do? Is that like a British thing? Yeah, it happened a couple of times in Britain. That's like a thing like like whites, like like, you got to check on like you have to go on store in front to see those stories. Oh, I see. I see they're real happy about

there was one there was one case I think in like rather, like rather rather rather than rather rather not rather not in the Netherlands. This is another place in the UK. Fuckleham. But they you know, I mean, they're always covering up child rape in the UK because it's like a big part of their culture. Right. It's one of the pillars of it. Child rape package. The literal Prince is a child rapist. Prince of England. Rather Ham Child. Rather Ham Child sexual exploitation scandal. And then when you click on it, Wikipedia is it gives you a 503 error. So you're not allowed to you're not allowed to read that article. You're not allowed to read the yeah.

Organize child sexual abuse. They can hurt the town of rather ham. Oh, here we go. And there's also the Rockdale child sex abuse ring. And that one's also not available. Are you sure it's not set off? Why did British police ignore Pakistani gangs abusing 1400 rather ham children 1400? Yeah. What the fuck? I'm sure of rampant child abuse ignored and abetted by the police emerging out of British down to rather him till now it's scale and scope would have been inconceivable in civilized country. It's origins, however, lying something quite ordinary with one labor MP called not wanting to rock the multicultural community

both. That's insane. Imagine the following case 14 year old was taken into care by the social services unit in the town where she lives because her parents are drug addicted and she's neglected and that's right in the school. Yeah, it was like, he's had a there's raping a whole crew of like pimp daddy papa papa's Wow of like Pakistani cherry popping daddy Pakistani guys who finally got the curfew on on midnight. Yeah, from their conservative father and they're going out and they're getting Jesus fucking Christ. Well, maybe you're right. Maybe they're trying to be more British. Maybe they do this is their way of trying to

sue Lee. This is what happened coming child molesters. There's nothing more British. Yeah, it was over 15 years. So you're talking about less than 100 girls a year. Yeah, that's I mean, I'd sex trafficked by myself and you really tried. Is that so? Yeah. Because to me, those do seem like really high. First of all, my understanding of sex traffic is you invite a woman over to your apartment, you're unable to get hard and then they get stuck in an Uber for an hour and a half trying to go back to Jersey. Oh, yeah. Well, in that case, I'm also sex traffic. That's what I think sex traffic is when a woman comes to

your apartment in the blue shoe does nothing. You have to take six. Yeah, even get a little movement on right. And then then then mostly you're having an allergic reaction. You have a headache. Yeah. Yeah. Your ears are hot. Right. I'm like, well, I'm hard now, but I can't fuck because I'll put my eyes on her. Yeah. Yeah. I just look like Paddington bear. I got my pants off, but I'm still wearing a hoodie and a hat. Damn, dude. Yeah. Almost no arrest. Oh, yeah, but Delta eight.com diet smoke promo code. Come town, come town, swimming either come town or come town. You're gonna get a great deal. You're

gonna love the way you look. You're gonna. And you should try this because I mean, they'll give you the guarantee. It will fuck you up. It will. 100%. You get fucked up. Now go there and buy it. Look, we don't fucking, you know, we used to make the reads all funny or whatever. Right. And now I'm trying to, it's the last year of show. I'm not, I'm not holding back, dude. I'm going to talk about my politics. Dude, about time. I've been telling you this. I'm going to bring up the rather him child sex abuse, which will immediately make the leftist dorks that listen to the show brace for some anti-chapo language. But then I make it even worse

by saying those women deserve to be raped. Right. And then the show becomes fun for me only. Right, right, right. Which is all I ever wanted. That's true. But anyways, point is, is we waste some precious time doing these fucking reads. So true, man. And so fucking true. Because, you know, we've got to, I coach a little league. You do. I got to be out of here. So you have any other brown on white news you want to talk about, Nick? I'm sorry. Didn't you start this show talking about fucking how you were disgusted that a black person dared to speak to you at when you were, oh, that was off mic. Sorry. Oh, right. I don't

know. I forgot to write right before we start. Yeah, you're making things up. Oh, no, I'm making things up. Dude, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Yeah, dude, that thing you said was fucking. It's just started lying on the show. All I'm saying is if you go buy the fucking Delta eight gummies, they will fuck you up. It is drugs. It should be illegal. But because of because of subsection of the farm bill or whatever the fuck it is, you can buy the shit now, go use promo code, come down or come down 20 by the shit. So I don't have to deal with emails. That's all I don't. I don't want. I don't want to deal with

emails. I don't care if they don't pay us. I don't care if they drop us as a client. Well, maybe they should pay us. They should pay us for the read. But I am done with emails. I'm done with them. I'm not doing them anymore. I'm too old. Good for you, man. When I was growing up, old folks, they didn't have to do email. That is that is actually true. You know, like you don't know how to use a computer grandpa. And it's like, bitch, I was in the Navy. I fuck. I got chlamydia from Africans. Right. The fuck do you mean? I don't know how to use you fuck you fuck the computer. Yeah, I raped my way all up and down the South China Sea in the

service of Uncle Sam. At one point, my dick was green. Okay. The fuck. I don't know how to use AOL. I'm going to pull my cock out right now. You can look at it. You can fucking look at it. It's not a wrinkle on the thing. You know why 40 years of fucking chemical peels induced by STDs that somebody got from a spider at some point. That's fucking awesome. The only medicine they had in those countries was coconuts, right? Different types, different types of fucking different parts of the coconut. So when you're fucking, you got, you have to become a man. You got your manhood ceremony or whatever, 3pm, your

dick's covered in bullet ants. And then you fuck your cousin, right? Because there's only 12 people that live in your village. And that's the pussy everyone's sharing. And then I come up, they liberate these people from the fucking nips. And then I fuck that. And now this is what my dick is. My dick looks like that. Why don't you tell your little computer friends that? Tell your fucking friends about my dick. And that's Rob for me because I didn't have a war. Yeah, we didn't get to have a war. Granted, we bombed my entire life, my entire adolescence. We have been killing other people. We've killed probably 8 million people in

the Middle East. But I didn't know. I didn't get to go. They didn't report that on the news. So I didn't know that I could enlist. I was watching Defend My Country. I was watching Family Guy and learning the different types of weed. I was learning all that. There used to be a million types of weed. And now it's legal. And now there's just a million types of not weed. Right. Such died smoke. Yeah. Which thank you to the former. All I ever wanted was to have my piss burn after fucking, you know, a woman that looks like Lando Calrissian's copar. That's all I wanted. To go to war and to have that.

And I would have stayed off the computer. And that got taken away from me. So what the least you can do is go to deltadiedsmoke.com, buy that shit. So I don't have to fucking read emails. Right. And I can just, I can sit at home and masturbate to the idea of having become infertile, doing war crimes and impotent from war crimes. Oh, man. Well, it would have been cool to be part of the greatest generation. No. Yeah. Fuck them. Just William Holden. They didn't even, growing up, you've never even seen a Chinese person. And then you're over there in war and you're like, are you saying we can fuck

them? Doc, Doc, are you saying it's all right to fuck them? Because, you know, some of those guys, some of those fight, if you're like from a farm in Missouri, totally, you know, there's like two people. There's the guy you bought milk off off. And that's the only person you've known. And now you're in the woods. I guarantee you one of them, like fuck the Chinese or Vietnamese and then probably had sex with a chimpanzee thinking that was like the same thing. Yeah. Well, I already did it to the one. I didn't know her brother was off limits. Like that's not her brother. Well, I guess I deserve this. What you call it?

HIV. But there's nothing in the Bible about that. Is there? I'll ask the chaplain. Maybe he can say a prayer for me and I'll get what you say was my tea sales back. What you say was I lost dock is my tea sales. That would really suck to get AIDS in the service. Well, I didn't know there was a difference between the hut people and what they were telling me is in the Angutan. I thought it was the grandma of the tribe. And I thought I'd be modest in fuck the least beautiful one. I thought maybe I'd be doing my Christian duty to have intercourse with the ugliest one of the tribe. So would not to feel as

lecherous as some of my brothers in my platoon. What immediately going through the big to the bimbo. Yeah, that sounds awesome. But then I done and did it. I got HIV from an orangutan. Wow, dude. And that's what that's in Vietnam. Yes, a thin red line. Okay. That's a movie that's in red line. Oh, I haven't seen it. No, yeah, that's all from that movie. It's really good. What are you saying? Oh, God, again. Pile HIV. Let's get the fucking spin off. Let's get the fucking reboot where Gomer has HIV.

He keeps getting it's a different episode. Did you fuck that orangutan? I thought it was the grandma. You fucked the grandma of the tribe. Well, I guess I didn't after all. That would have been a disaster. Well, I guess you could say then I averted disaster by getting HIV from the orangutan. Canned laughter. I'll let it slide this time, Pile.

He's just slowly dying the rest of the season. Turns out my HIV was cured by being irradiated by one of the test sites. Oh, fuck. Wow. Can't wait to see it. Yeah. Gomer Pile F A G G O T. What's the original USMC? Gomer Pile USMC. Oh, he was in the Marine Corps. Wow. A Jughead. Yeah.

Or a Jar Jar Jar. A Jughead was the comic. Right. She's friend. Right. So fucking fag head. That's what they call it. I don't think that was in there. Jughead sounds like a slur. No.

Like about a group of people with a big head. I suppose that's true. I hope people don't get trying to cancel me over saying those 1400 girls. That'd be right. Did you say that? Yeah, because they're British though. Oh, right. So I was I was on some like, let's check these mayo ass. Right.

Because who are the whitest people in the world? And they're the colonizer. That's my thing is like I'm specifically those girls who had horrible parents that abandoned them. You know, obviously naturally I'm mad about Ukraine. You know, I get heated about this because I've warned people for years. I said, if you know, you've over Donald Trump, this is what's going to happen. I said, you know, he's just going to fucking what's going to feel. And then, of course, Donald Trump gets elected.

And then, you know, he loses the election. But then two and a half years later, fucking look at look at us. What fucking happens, you know, and but but so I'm mad about it. But I also want to make sure that I'm not supporting any of the mayo ass Nazi. Of course, Ukrainian soldiers. Right. Because that ain't it. That is not it.

You show me some of the ally white women. Well, Ukrainian soldiers. Those are the ones. That's who I got the blue and white out for blue and yellow. The blue and yellow. Yeah. Well, personally, I have it out for Tony Sopranos mistress in the first season. She's Ukraine.

She's Ukraine. Oh, missing the leg. No, that's the sister. That's her cousin. But yes, they're both Ukrainian. Yeah. I'm talking about the. Those are some tough broads.

Yeah, no, it's true. Like it's hot. You know, it's got like, it must be a nightmare right now for mail order bride guys because they can't. If you go and check the day, the day the invasion happened, you went on chatter bit. There's a lot of girls just using their phone. And they're the thing was like, this is bombs going off in the background. They're like, this may have been my last broadcast.

Oh my God. People are like show pussy. Oh, that's so sad. You guys are pussy. Show pussy, baby. Please. Damn. Can I see your sweet pussy before you die?

Just camming is a Titanic is sinking. Respect. You go out doing what you fucking love like the guys playing the fucking violin. Yeah. Yeah. She's she has a low. It has been an absolute honor to masturbate with you. Fuck my dick and fuck my fuck my fuck my fuck my dick and fuck me and my fuck it.

My dick is more than shit. My dick is more than fucking. What are they going to? What are they going to hit Titanic on 4k blu-ray? Trying to see those CDs on there. Okay, man. I'm not. I'm not.

I watched it. I watched it. I don't know if I ever said on the show, but I used to have a recurring dream about Fabrizio dying and getting real sad about it as a kid. I mean, that Jack's friend Fabrizio. He drowns. I guess crushed by the fucking. Oh, he gets crushed by the by the thing.

The tower. The tower. Yeah. Whatever the fuck that is. Yeah. I don't remember how he died. I remember him dying and being sad. He goes.

He's like, yeah, he's fucking Jack's Italian friend. And then Jack just gets his ticket. Yeah. Is that how it works? No. They both go on. They both go on at the same time, but he's not in the movie at all. Yeah.

But there's also like multiple YouTube tributes to what is a truly memorable character. Yeah. Fabrizio. Jack's friend Fabrizio. He's in it for like the very beginning, right? The very beginning. Yeah. They're running on the boat.

Yeah. They're running to the boat. They're running to the boat. And then maybe he pops up later. He's like, Jack, I got a piece of pussy. I got a bit of time. There's a piece of pussy. They win that they win the tickets in a card game if I remember correctly.

Yeah. Yeah. It's a good movie. That's an unlucky draw. Yeah. You'd rather have lost. You'd rather have lost. But you get if you fall in love.

True. Before you die. True. And she doesn't let you know. Yeah, that's right. I forgot he doesn't let you on the damn door with her. Well, apparently it's a matter of buoyancy or some shit. No, she's a dumb bitch.

That's what James Cameron says. He's a fucking liar. He finally answered that question. He said it was like the weight or whatever. It wouldn't float to people. That's so stupid. Some shit like that. Some shit like that.

Yeah. Why even answer the question? It's like, I don't know because here's a fucking stupid. Because he needs to die at the end of the movie. Exactly. That's the answer. That's the answer. It's like, because, oh, yeah, you're right.

The movie should have ended where they both go on the door. And they fall in love. And then they live happily ever after. Yeah. Why don't you make that movie? You fucking cunt. Tell him. Talk to him.

He should let me. I should just go with James Cameron. You should. You should. You look a lot like him. Yeah. I look like that Tom from Finland guy. Yeah.

We're both a much smaller dick. No. Like an insanely smaller dick. No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. Maybe like one, one hundred and ninety-eight. No, no, no, no, no. Size.

No, no, no, no. No, no, no. Okay. Yes. All right folks.