The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - Ep. 306 – off the rails

Episode Date: April 8, 2022

really falling apart here

Welcome to Comtown. Welcome to Comtown. I want to preface to the audience because I'm an honest broadcaster. I have a phone call that I will have to take at a certain point during this episode. Yes, I'm a bug. Yes, I'm gay. I understand. The person calling me is my boyfriend. We're in love. He's hot and his dick is smaller than mine. Uncut. We stalk, of course. Oh, hold on. Sorry, you weren't... Can we hear you now? Will, check. Yeah, check. Test, test, test. We have Y. Dick Willey on the show today. Hello. Filling in for Stavros, who is in transit currently. Yeah, he's on the back of a trailer. They're sending him in a

cargo ship. Yeah, it says oversized load. That's very funny. Yeah, they got him and he's taking up two lanes of traffic. And there's another... There's a next to that truck in the third lane blocking all lanes of the highway is like a gas tanker that's filled with ceramist. Yeah, that's cool. It goes from that into Stavros' mouth. Kind of to fuel him up. Yeah. Kind of like how a stealth bomber needs to be refueled in midair or like fuels like an Air Force One midair. You know what I was thinking about the other day that I always enjoyed is like, you know the movie Free Willy? Yeah, no, I was just thinking the End of Free Willy where they have to take it

in the back of a pickup truck and keep posing it down. They have to keep posing it down for that. Free Willy is a movie they use like one of this. They use the trained Orca. Yeah, they use one of the slaves. Yeah, exactly. And then the movie is about one of those animals being free. And then they use that animal and they shoot the movie and they're like, well, back to jail. I mean, I was like, I feel like if you like fucking like at the end of Green Mile, they actually fucking put Michael Clark Duncan in the electric chair. It's like literally the same exact thing. Yeah. And like, you know, like a Willy, the the whale actor slash slave. I mean, like, you can see it because that thing like they're

dorsal fin just sort of like curls over on itself. And they're like, like, oh, like that means that they're happy. Like just look, yes, this happens to this happens to certain whales when they live in a swimming pool. Remember that controversy, people are mad that they didn't get an actual whale. They got a comedian, Amy Schumer to play. Oh, free Willy. What's her deal this week? She's like listing all the jokes that they wouldn't tell her at the Oscars. She was like, basically, I wanted to call Chris Rocket to his best. And they said, well, you can't do that. Yeah. I hate this fucking anti free speech censorship. Well, she got in trouble. I think for insulting Kirsten Dunst and Jesse Plumins in a set up

bit that Kirsten Dunst was in on. So I don't understand. Yeah, I have no idea. I don't get it. Yeah, I did. It's the same people that were like, yeah, the slap was fake. And they're like this one that was that was real. The Kirsten Dunst thing was real. But the slap was that was a setup. Jesse Plumins should have slapped her. Yeah, should have attacked her on. Jesse Plumins and Amy Schumer in like a race to be the who can become more disgusting with each passing year. That's the day I was I will give it to the the WHORES on the Amy Schumer catches a lot of flak specifically, probably just for me. Yeah. And is that an actor? What is WHORES? It's my favorite radio station actor union. Yeah, you're listening

to WHORES. But the you know, I mean, people take shots at Jesse Plumins. I mean, you feel like if he were a woman that did that to themselves, you know, I mean, I just think I think he's he's giving hope to all sort of like dumpy, slobbingly guys out there that you can dig. Also, it's not like he's also like he's he's he's like he's like like a guy that was like that regularly, but then just like took like COVID as like a full steam ahead, you know, like get like approval to just fucking really go on. He's his Fat Damon. I mean, he was Fat Damon. Yeah, he was Fat Damon. What does he know? Now he looks like the fucking like the gay genie from the Aladdin Broadway. He looks he looks

unrecognizable. He's blue and has big ass titties. A lot of people get fat, but he's like some people get fat in a way where it's like their body's like, what the hell are we supposed to do with all this stuff? You know, like the fucking it's just jans all like cheekbones. Your forehead gets bigger. Your body doesn't know it like stops been fat as a whole life. So when he gains 100 pounds, it's like this graceful orchestra, fat distribution. It's like, you know, everything. No, he's lucky. Everything has its place, you know, it's like evenly balanced. The guy like that overnight, they're like, yeah, why don't I gain like 500 pounds? And then yeah, he's got like fucking his eyelids are like just hanging on the he

has fat eyelids now. He's got fat. Everything. Damn. I mean, I think it's honestly, I think we need to cut this conversation because it's like normally we have stuff here who's one of the fattest people in America. And now we have, you know, we have three guys with six packs talking about people's bodies. No. And it's just like, I feel like we kind of, you know, we can hide behind stuff very easily, you know, I get to look at it. Look at this man. Look at Jesse Plymouth. I guarantee if you right now, you went and dug up Philip Seymour Hoffman's body, it would look better than that. It would look like a better version of that. He's not that fat. No, I know. That's what I mean. It's just a normal guy. No. He's,

he's like, I mean, real. He looks like AOC's boyfriend broke up with him. If she, if he got dumped, if that guy got dumped, he would turn into Jesse Plymouth. No, I think Jesse Plymouth was kind of cute though. Listening to the body shaming. Who else's body is bad? Um, I don't know. I can't, honestly, I love all bodies. Um, no, I think, uh, I think Jesse doesn't look that bad. I don't understand why you're going in on him so hard. No, you're just trying to, you think Jesse listens to the show and you're going to DM him on ambient and be like, King, you're, I love you. I'm not in the hopes that he's going to put you in. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Listen, guys, you're afraid

that I got a lot. I took a lot of heat this week because last, last week on the Patreon, I said that I haven't. I thought that the second season of the gemstones fell off. A lot of people have been DMing me. Yeah, fucking faggot, like nothing, nothing you ever do. Routed up the, the gem, the gem squad. Yeah. I didn't know that gemstones fans and listen, like I am in Hollywood too. Me and Danny McBride are colleagues. Okay. We are a members of the same elite club. You know, so I'm going out there and I'm taking a shot at, at a, at a friend, at a colleague. You are just someone that is, uh, that is threatening my life on, on the internet. You know, it's there's a difference between us. That's all

I'm saying. You know, I'm, I'm putting my neck out there and I would love to work with any of those guys. If they'd have me, I'd do anything. I'd craft services. We all know about your late, late night celebrity DMs. What are you talking about? Oh, you know what I'm talking about. Listen, I'm friends with a lot of influencers, a lot of creatives. See, I, I, the only wheels I'm trying to, you're the, you're the most famous comedian in America. The only wheels I'm trying to, don't act like you're not. All right. All right. I've already gotten what I want. I now have a press pass to the New York international auto show. Yeah. It's a buddying up to the regular car reviews guy. And that's all I

ever wanted. I used to go to the car show every year with my dad. Yeah. You have it center. Yeah. Well, you know, but the press days is when those are like, they got extra shit. Oh, they got the even cooler cars. I've applied numerous times and they're like, we don't know what, what do you mean come town? And they wouldn't let me, I was like, yes, me and my associates, it's like car talk when we talk about come. Yeah. Yeah. Well, me and my associate and it was a whatever dumb woman I was dating at the time. I'd be like, this is my assistant. They'd be like, no, no, you can't come. You can't come to the car show. I'll be like, I will be there on one of the public days. And I hope we for

your sake, we do not cross paths while I'm collecting my free Subaru tote bags. So you've broken through. You're on the inside now. I am on the inside. That's huge for you. No, I have to go get business casual clothes because I'm told I cannot show up wearing a Ferrari track suit as you. Yeah. Can I can I style you for the show? No, come on, bro. You can have your own life. No, we can have a shopping day. You can have your own life. We can go out like no, Nick. Go out to Soho from my life. You can be you can shopping girls. You can take your you can have your your Vivaans fever dreams where you're DMing Charlie X C X trying to get to the Grammys. She's a friend and I'm gonna I'm gonna set my sights on something

a little bit more reasonable. You're gonna be in like a like a like a nice like a sharp attire going to SEMA and being allowed to sit in the fire trucks. That's that's that's where my sights are set. Yeah, that's true. But like honestly that you present yourself in that way, but that's I know you and I know what's in your heart and like desperately comes the bullshit. Here comes the bullshit. Nick's greatest dream and I'll be honest is to be at the Academy Awards and they say the nominees for Best Best Actress Helen Mirren Dame Judy Dench Nick Mullen. Yeah, Vanessa Redgrave Vanessa Redgrave and they say your name. Yeah, and you go out on stage and you thank me. Well, you're after you. My dream

is is to be in some kind of oceans 11 style caper in which we steal the train from the Ben Franklin Institute. That'd be pretty tight. That's my life stream and it'll never happen because I could never put together a crew of a multiracial crew of smirking thieves. You have to use to do the heist by building train tracks right up to the front door of the that's how they got it in there. That's how they got it in. They trained it in. Yeah, I didn't realize that. That's awesome. When you think about I tried to go to the Ben Franklin Institute as an adult because I have fond memories of it as a kid. I'm like, I bet that place is awesome. And I was in there for five minutes. I'm like, Oh, this is for babies. Have you

been? No, was it was in Philly? Yeah, okay. Yeah, you would love it as a child. You would have. Yeah. Now it's pretty stupid. You can touch everything in there. Like is like the thing you discovered electricity with? Yeah, it's not actually not a lot of Ben Franklin stuff. A lot of those like, you know, like for Texas, we roll a quarter, stuff like that a room where you can go inside. So it's sort of like a science museum. So Liberty Science Center. He goes around there. One of those static electricity machines where your hair gets spiky. They have. Well, you've been there. Do you ever go to a children's museum? Yeah, yeah, Liberty Science Center was the one. It's right across the river in Jersey. That

was like the fun where you could touch everything and you know, interact with all the all the learning places were cool. Like, you know, they explained like pneumatic post systems so that you can sit on one side of the room and send the letter. Oh, I love pneumatic. I love pneumatic mail delivery. One of those in my house one day. They had a thing where this other thing that I don't know if he invented or not, but it's basically like a satellite dish on one side of the room. And then a satellite dish or in the other side of the room. And there's like where the thing that concentrates the beam in the middle or whatever, you know, satellite works as it comes in the dish and then that projects. It's like focused back

into like some kind of single point. Yeah, yeah, back in. So that's just like a cup that you speak into and like you're like a whisper into it and it'll be across the room. And if you put your ear to the other one, you can hear it. He used that to talk dirty to French widows. Well, you put your cock in there and you get STDs. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Did he go insane from syphilis or whatever? Probably all did. Like probably like a quarter of all adult men in that era had syphilis and then like, you know, there's no cure for it. So it just like worked its way into your brain eventually. Back then, the whole world is basically like

a nerd's dorm. Yeah, theater kids, that's the founding fathers on getting STDs and not thinking they will because they never expected to fuck in the first place on the upcoming Patreon episode, you could, you could subscribe at patreon.com slash come town. Nick and I really go in on a specific group of nerds that probably didn't deserve it. But we spent like we just read tweets from these random for, I don't know, Sean McCarthy sent it, but I guess there's some group of communists online. There's a guy who's got a whole track record of like a year of like, how dare men ask for sex. Why are men? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. And then I guess he tried to rape his roommate. So over the weekend now he's in jail. And

so we just, yeah, why do men ask for sex? They should just take. Yeah, right. Back to the Ben Franklin Institute as a child. Let's get back into the first place I ever had. They got real lazy with candy in the late nineties. And I remember my favorite was just the spray. They had, you could just spray, mace your mouth with like sour. It was like a candy. Benaka. Yeah. Yeah. What happened? Like, but Benaka, like, like the, the, the, the breath, the breath spray. That was a movie. I was a movie trope, you know, actually a guy going on a date or something. Yeah. Just dumb and dumber. Yeah. It was just dumb and dumber. It was just dumber. Sprays it sideways. Yeah. Yeah. Funny joke. But it was so funny

that everybody, that is very funny. Yeah. And I think it's, it's like one of those Berenstein bears. No, I think they were playing on that being a movie trope. Well, I mean, it's the only movie I remember. But yeah, exactly. I'm not going to be able to cite another example. Maybe, maybe fucking Carlton banks and fresh Prince of Bel Air did it once or twice. Carlton did it the entire series run. No, Carlton's thing was that it was extremely good at dancing. They did it in porkies. The Last American Virgin. Two and three. This is what I love to do. That was like this, this like all the culture wars shit is devolved to being so apolitical. Now that like, there's like conservatives sharing a clip of Will Smith on Arsenio Hall

from 1991, making fun of somebody being bald. And they're like, glass houses. Checkmate. Who gives a fuck? Where did you even get this poll? Yeah, anyway, it's conservatives that are trying to take will down. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, they've made it political. Everything now is like you have to pick one side or the other because initially it was women that are being like he stood up for his man. He stood up for his woman. Yeah. And then it's also to like Chris Rock in this case represents comedians that have been canceled for raping women. Oh, right. So he was right for whatever reason. Yeah, because you should be able to do any joke you want. Can I just be team will in peace? Yeah, I don't need people to be

chiming in. I just support him no matter what. Yeah, I watched King Richard actually a couple days after the Oscars. It is hilarious. Yeah, it is so funny. Yeah. And then like he's doing this voice. I gotta, I gotta start talking about movies with you now that I'm back into doing stand up. You forget that that's the whole thing. I was, I was talking about the Huggins like his, the character that he chooses is he's just like like a plantation slave. Like that's the voice. And then I like pulled up a YouTube clip of the real Richard Williams talking and he talks nothing like that. Okay. And I have no idea why he made that choice. And in some scenes, it seems like he's kind of a little bit, maybe mentally handicapped.

And it's just, it's awesome. It rocks. It's a great movie. King Richard would be a great title for a movie about someone who was mentally handicapped to raise, you know, two daughters to become world-class athletes. But it does seem to be the point of that movie is sort of like, did you see it? No, I did not see it. It's great. It seems to me like, I mean, you can tell me if Ron, it seems to me is like, if you abuse your kids, it's okay if they become world-class athletes. He, I mean, I guess what he does maybe, I don't think it's abuse. I think he's just a, I think it paints him as a good dad. So it's the movie whiplash, basically. But what if the, what if the Nazi character was a black fellow?

No whiplash guy was meaner. Okay. Yeah. The J.K. Simmons guy was meaner. Richard was like, you're special and you're going to be the best in the world. I remember liking whiplash and then reading a review from some film critic. I can't remember who it was, but they're like, they like a jazz for real. And they're like, no one would say that about a buddy rich. And it's like, get shut up. Who? This is why people don't like jazz. Yeah. Yeah. The whole review had to deal with like, Oh, the people they said were good at jazz are actually not my personal best choice. The deep cuts I would pick as somebody that's fucking obsessed with jazz music. It's so stupid. It's a fun. I might rewatch whiplash.

Really? Yeah, it's good. It's a good movie. Is it good? It's weird that kid didn't like, you know, you thought he would be a guy that miles teller. Yeah. But I guess it's because he's got that weird like his face. His face looks reconstructed. He has like a, he has an interesting face. Yeah. He's, he's, he's in the new top gun. Yeah. I can't wait. Yeah. I've definitely seen that. He looks like a fucking plane for real. He looks like a safe fell on his head at some point. I just watched rebuild the whole thing. I just watched Todd Phillips war dogs for the first time. It's very good. Yeah. He's in it. It's, it's, it's a print. It's an awesome movie. Actually trying to buddy up to Todd Phillips now. Well, we

have some late night DMs. Todd's a friend. He's a friend. Yeah. Anyone involved in the project, you know, shout out to them. You know, we're in Hollywood. Um, what a, what fuck? What? Okay. It's my phone call. You know what? Just turn the phone off, dude. Okay. I'll let the audience in on what's happening right now. I'll let the audience in on what's happening because it's not that crazy. My father is coming to visit New York to visit me for the first time since my college graduation. I'm very excited. I think he just landed. So I have to call him back. You're greeting that with silence. Sorry. Oh, yeah. No, I was, uh, it's an exciting thing for me. I'm excited to hang out and show him the city.

What are you going to do with them? Let me ask you this. You're going to take on a Broadway show. I'm going to take you to the top, top of the world trade center. Let me ask you this. Can I have some of your terror chips? Yes. I'm going to take him to the Queens Museum Panorama where you can see the model of the model of New York City. New York City that Robert Moses commissioned. He's going to love that. He was an architect. Um, my my old man, uh, I don't know a couple other things. Go to dinner, chill. You want to give him the power broker. He's ever read it. My dad. No, he's not going to read that shit. Would he like to come? It's not about Israel. It is. In a way, I guess he's Jewish. Yeah.

It's a Jewish guy kicking brown people out of their homes. All right. I don't know how to read more. All right. Yeah. The cross prongs, the cross prongs express way instead of the wall. All right. You sold. All right. I'm going to go. I'm going to call back real quick. Uh, we can, we can go in or just, uh, yeah, yeah. We'll, we'll cruise right too. Feel free to eat on. All right. You read power broker? Uh, no, I never have. Did you read the LBJ books? No, I haven't read any of Caro. It just seems like two, two, two intimidating, you know, to start, but I went to the, I went to the LBJ museum and presidential library when I was in Austin. That was really cool. Oh, that was really cool. It's, it's

really fun. Yeah. Um, yeah, I was going to, you can listen to like all the phone calls where he's like, you know, like, uh, right, getting horny for Catherine Graham and talking to the, the Hager slacks company. I need bigger slacks. Everyone can see my cock. He's like, you know, he's, there's one where he's talking about his bunghole to the CEO of Hager slacks. He's like, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta do something about my bunghole. Yeah. That's the riding up on my bunghole. I went to his hometown once where I drove through it when I was on the road at some point. And it's very funny cause that's like, like the home of LBJ is fucking nothing. Yeah. Like a pizza restaurant and like nothing else, a gas station

maybe. I was very just like, I would just leave it off of there. It's not enough of a claim to save this town. Birthplace of LBJ. Yeah. When I was in Austin, I was very funny. I was returning the rental car and there was some like, like, uh, you seem like almost like a sociopathic, uh, like gay guy, like just dark sun glasses on, very like slick looking like an evil guy. Yeah. An evil guy, like, uh, like, uh, yeah, like a seedy kind of like, you know, hit man or villain character. And he's like going back and he's seated. He's not at the desk. He's seated and he's talking to the woman behind the desk as if they have some kind of like personal relationship. Like this is a guy that's in trouble all the

time that anytime he's in trouble with somebody, he's got like this kind of like guidance counselor report with them. Well, and they're like, yeah, they're saying it's $5,900. And he's like, but just for three weeks though, that's crazy. And they're like, yeah, well, you know, they had to call the repo guy to track you down and stuff. He'd like just stolen a rental car and he's trying to negotiate after the fact. And he's like, but what would it have been if I had just rented it for three weeks? And she's like $2,900 with insurance and she's like, but you didn't, you ran it for two days and kept it for three weeks. And he's like, but they're showing it as a return, right? And she's like, yeah, she's like, so why is

the repossession even involved? And she's like, you know, cause they had to call Charlie and he had to come hunt you down or whatever. Who the Vietnamese? And he's like, well, I'll say this, Charlie was very, very weird guy. Him and his wife, very weird guy. I mean, it's just like this guy, he had this like extremely personal relationship with the lady with the whole process of stealing a rental car. Like being accused of it. It was very funny. I was not really a story that could go anywhere. I thought maybe it would be worth a chuckle while Adam deals with this expensive phone calls. It's not expensive and I apologize. I'm professional. This guy, we live with his fancy phone calls.

If we started the episode 40 minutes earlier, I wouldn't have had to interrupt it. No one's fall. It's not your fault. It's not my fault. He's got an old, he's got an old two horn on it with solid gold buttons. Well, my father says, hello, Nick, and he's looking forward to meeting you. We're not meeting. Yes, you are. I'm being home reading power broker. No, you guys are going to hang. We're all going to hang out. You guys, you guys don't want to be like your dad come to do you want to see ambulance this weekend? The new Michael Bay movie? Oh yeah, for sure. Actually, you know what I kind of want to do is, you know, go out, maybe you, Nick, me, uh, and just try to get pussy with my father. Yeah. Yeah.

What day is this weekend? I'm going to the car show on the 13th. Yeah, you're not going to be like, oh, like, like a wind man for your dad. The 13th is next week. Yeah. Yeah. The 10th and 11th or the, the ninth, the 10th is this week is the 11th, the 10th, the 10th. Your birthday is the 10th. Yeah. I don't know why I always thought it was the 11th. Bad friend. What's your social security number again? I can't say. I can't say. Um, what was I going to say? No, but I, I am very, I'm excited. Super spesiosa is the sponsor this week. Super spesiosa super get super leaf.com. Yeah. It is cratum. It is a disgusting powder that, uh, that is from Southeast Asia, from Southeast Asia. So it's basically this

shit. It'll fuck you up, but in a way that's legal and can report to whatever the laws are regarding what I'm allowed to say about it. And it'll make you feel good. It makes you feel good. It is not a, uh, you know, a cure for anything or whatever. Well, you ever done cratum? Yeah. Uh, you ever smoked crack? Oh, yeah. I feel like you got, did you get heavy in the crater or no? No, no, no, I never did. Like I feel like she's Felix liked it. Uh, like, you know, like, I, I, you know, like I, I, I, I, I drank a glass of that, that garbage a couple of times and you know, nasty, you know, maybe, maybe feel all right. But to me, like the, uh, no, no disrespect to the sponsor, but to me, the

juice is never worth the squeeze because it's just like how gross, like swallowing it was. Was it really? This place, they got capsules. So you know, okay, cool. Yeah. There's a, there's a Thai restaurant in Brooklyn that does cratum, like, uh, non-alcoholic cocktails. Get superleaf.com. Get the capsules if you don't like the taste. Um, it's the same thing. Yeah. You know, but yeah, Felix is, uh, Felix is to be heavy on that. I remember when he moved out of Amber's place and I moved into his room, he had like spilled. Yeah. I mean, it smelled like, it smelled like somebody died in a vitamin shot at a Met Rex. Yeah. Yeah. No, like, uh, whenever, whenever he has this big gym bag, it's like, he puts it

down. There's always like sort of like a, like a cloud comes off. Yeah. I haven't seen his upper West side place. Is it tidier than the, yeah, yeah. It's much tidier. He's gotten, he's our boys, our boys become a man. Absolutely. But something's almost still about going over when he finally moved down on his own. There was a knife sticking out. Oh yeah. I heard about the green point knife in wedged in between the with the blade sticking up. It's like home alone or something. He's a fucking trap for someone. Yeah. Some people said they went over to watch MMA and he had a, he had a blade coming out of his couch, which will never happen against super leaf. No, it won't happen coming out of the couch. So many DM me. They

said this shit better not suck super leaf. Yeah. I better not be bad because they're a drug addict who uses this stuff all the time and they got it. And what did they say? They said it's actually very good credit groovy. So according to an expert, I mean, I drank it for, they sent it to me for free. Try out the product. I became hopelessly addicted to everything. Within days I was drinking it from sunup to well, not sunup, but from about three, whenever I wake up, 3pm, four till I go to sleep, nine, 10pm. Yeah. And kind of like a, kind of like a white wine and a Benzo kind of mom awake like three hours a day. Yeah. Except instead of children, I have a genital herpes and your little boys.

Yeah. Right. So, you know, I get just crippling addiction almost immediately. That's how good this stuff is folks. Wow. Is that I was personal hygiene out the window. Wow. You know, fucking wiping even sayonara. See on the other side of Mount Fuji, I'm fucking filled with this shit in my ass and I'm high on Kratom. You're pooping the bed. I was. I fucking ruined several sheets. There was shit stains everywhere. I had fallen into become one of those like my 600 pound life guys just for like the Indonesian dirt. It's what I like to call a reverse Mike Lindell situation. I started off as a racist millionaire and slowly fall backwards into a crack at it, into a bad drug addict. And the only thing

that's consistent is the mustache. That's it. But no, this shit is good. It's not actually a drug. It's not actually, I don't know if I'm allowed to say it's addictive or not. No, he was emotionally addicted. Not. Look, I'll be, I'll be an addict no matter what I'm in terror trips right now. They're fucking disgusting. Can I have some? I can't stop myself because you know what they say about chips? Once you pop the fund, you can't see it. You can never go back. Yeah. So, um, yeah. Anyway, guys, you go to get super leave.com.com use promo code come town or come town 20 to get a million dollars. Yeah, they literally give you money. It will give you a million dollars if you go right now

in fiat currency, fiat currency. It's all, it's all in the Venezuelan crypto, whatever the shit they invented. What was the deal? How did they fix inflation? They created a second currency that well, like right now or last like year or two, they had like a second fail. You're supposed to know this. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. You're smart. You're smart about money. Yeah. It's how to spend it. You're, you're how to spend. I mean, I just thought like the way they deal with inflation is just cause another recession. Yeah, I think like that that would I had read and I barely paid attention that they just in stores. They had like a second currency that reflected like the actual

value of things or whatever. But then it was still, then you'd like had to do the conversion. So people weren't doing, they couldn't do the conversion on the fly. I don't know. That's sure or not. Yeah. I mean, like I would just think that like, you know, like I said, like usually the way they do inflation is just, you know, like, yeah, just causing a recession. Yeah. Yeah. And cause like, I mean, like, I think, I think they like the inflation is like what they really, what they really hate is like a tight labor market. Yeah. And I think they're going to do anything possible to just, you know, get some slack into that again. Yeah. Get people, get people back to work. Turkey's really fucked in the ass. Turkey.

Why? I thought they're making peace with Ukraine and Russia inflation was. Oh, but if they make peace, they'll probably get some money. Fuck about Russia, Ukraine. You know, no, I don't care. I care about, I care about all either. Either the Russians are genociding civilians or they aren't either way. Who can not my problem. It's the most basic things in the world. Who cares about Eastern Europeans genociding each other? All of the problems in the last hundred years, the big ones have all been caused by caring a little bit too much about what Eastern Europeans are doing to each other. The enemy of my cousin is also my cousin. Exactly. They, first of all, they love, they

love being there. There was there was some German people say like pit bulls don't like dog fighting. Are you kidding me? In the last bread for in the last hundred years, there were some Germans that caused a little bit of problems too. Getting mad at Hitler is like getting Michael Vick. All right. And it's cultural. It's cultural. I'm not going to say what he did was right or the good, the right, the right thing to do or the good, a good thing. But if you think about it, something along those lines, yeah, he's a hell of a quarterback. Just, just think about it. He's a hell of a, he's got, he's got wheels and he's got, he's got a gun. I don't remember the story, but at the end of the day, I remember

people thinking we went a little too hard on Michael Vick. Yeah. And that's what they're saying about Hitler. I can only say this. Thank God Michael Vick didn't kill himself in a bunker or whatever happened. Thank God he kept living. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's an analyst now. He paid his debt to society and he kept living. Yeah. Um, and he's married to a pit bull now. He is. Yeah. Yeah. That would be a cool move. If you got married to a dog, if you got, if he was like publicly fucking and kissing a pit bull, we love each other. It's like, can you, can you believe I used to bet money on whether my wife would kill another dog or not? Now she's, now we, you know, we stay up and watch Netflix together.

Right. He had to do a bunch of sensitivities training towards pit bulls and it just went too far. Now it's morning. Yeah. Now he's in love with pit bulls. Honestly, that would be, that would be the smartest. Let me ask you this. Has Mr. Worldwide Pit Bull himself ever chimed in on the Michael Vick controversy? No, he feels like if anyone could speak on it, his silence is definite. That guy is so successful. Dude, I love him. He's might be the perfect celebrity. People call it politics. I call it politics. Did he say that? Yeah. No. And there's, there's, there's a compilation of him in like 15 different interviews saying that exact phrase. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He always reminded me of like the slickest guys I worked

with at any sales jobs. They weren't ever necessarily the best salesman, but just like they just would talk to every prospective customers if they were trying to like just fuck them all night long. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just like the full court press, the full court press. You already got a cell phone. You mind if I take a look at a real quick? Yes. A nice phone. That's a good phone you got, but maybe we can get you some a little, a little something better. Like no, thanks. I'm all right with my current plan. I get unlimited texting. All right. You have a nice day. Beautiful. You got a 45 year old man. Oh, okay. Thanks, man. That's so fun. Keep having a beautiful day. I had one of those guys. I went to get

dinner at Applebee's the other night. You try to fuck you. I mean, he was like, he was like, I mean, yeah, I mean, I could have. He did have plastic gloves on because of the COVID shit, but he might as well. He was acting like a like a vampire's butler like that. I mean, I don't know. He was just sort of like, like, sequious. You know, I'll be like, yeah, can I get the fucking that appetizer sampler? Can I get the the the southwestern quesadilla right? Excellent choice. Can I recommend a soda to pair a pair of this? Excellent choice. Yeah. Now the Baja, the Baja mist is a Applebee's exclusive. Did you know that Mountain Dew has exclusive flavors? They used to with Taco Bell. Yeah, because I think it's Taco Bell's

owned by PepsiCo. Imagine being one of the guys. See, you used to be able to just, if you're a big fat guy, you could be a guy like, I'm going to Applebee's to try out the new Mountain Dew flavor that's exclusive to Applebee's. And now you have to be like a fucking thing. You have to have a hammer and sickle in your username and rape your roommates. This is basically the last episode. The one that's coming out on Sunday is like real, like real, like intellectual threads that really just unravel and then weave back into themselves and like, yeah, well, basically, potentially us losing our minds. It's a lot of those people are produced by, you know, quote unquote late capitalism or whatever. That's how they turn

into these communists. And it's like, that's not really a place for them in society either, obviously, or they wouldn't be end up in jail for rape. And there was a universal thing. And I'll tell you if there was a, there was an answer and it was fucking fast, casual restaurants, fast, casual restaurants and Star Trek and Bennigan's Star Trek. You go to the Star Trek convention, one of the happy, I saw in a 24 hour McDonald's, a group of guys that had just come from fucking Otacon beaming and they were at McDonald's at 2am. It was the happiest day of those guys. That's community. Yeah. Yeah. And they're surrounded by homeless people that also have their place in McDonald's 2am. And that was sort of like,

you know, it was right before the recession. Everything fell apart after that. We had to figure out, were they in costume? I mean, those guys are always kind of in costume. What's Otacon like an anime thing? Like an anime thing. Yeah. Basically, our point was that you just can't be a regular nerd anymore. You can't. You have to be like, have been sucked into online politics. The problem with that is like, it's still like a fantasy type of escape, but it's one that's like sort of grounded in reality. Like they think there's is going to be some revolution. Whereas it used to be like, you know, there's no chance you're going to meet Commander Riker. It's not going to happen. So it doesn't like fuck

with your sense of like, you can fully. Yeah, like you can like, you're not, you're not grasping for something that's like you feel is like, like perpetually unfulfilled or drudging insane. There is no possibility the gap between like your fantasy and the reality that you expect to be fulfilled. There was some experiment. I can't remember who did it, but I guess that they put chimpanzees in cages and in another room they had chimpanzees with their fouchy. They were in cages, but then they are the cage, but they gave them cratum. Yeah. The cage has some kind of had some kind of like chasm. There was like some big gap and on the other side was freedom. And then the chimpanzees that had a glimpse

at freedom or a way that they couldn't get past the chasm. Obviously, those are the ones that went insane and sort of smashed their heads against the ground or the wall and killed themselves. And then they were adopted by a middle-aged suburban lady, Jane Goodall. Yeah, exactly. Well, that's how they made the vaccines. I understand correctly. That's how foul she did it. That's how foul she did it is. But what's the experiment he did? He put Beagle's heads in Ziploc bags. MRNA stands for a monkey-rape nucleic acid. Wow. Yeah. No, he was like fucking, like they had some bullshit. He was like, let's say we're going to try and create a real-life wishbone, a Jack Russell terrier that can read. So we're

going to just back over it with a Toyota Tercel 35 times and see if that does it. It's crazy because you can get grant money for some dumb bullshit. Yeah, it's true. Yeah. It was not a whole Matthew Leskos whole thing. Yeah. Free money to government. Was that for research? I think it was just bullshit grants. Just saying that you do a research project. Yeah. A research project and wearing a cool suit. Yeah. He's like, what if I want to get a lot of these? We wear question marks for free. My ass is getting paid. He did talk like that. He said, I thought it was inappropriate. And then people are like, who is this guy? This guy's just trying to live off the government, right? Yeah. Well-fair. Did you know that

I remember that guy, Bernard Goldberg? Yes. He had like the book of like the hundred greatest pinheads screwing up America. And one of them was on Fox News because it was like, you know, like encouraging people to just steal money from the government and, you know, like live off grants to electrocute golden retrievers or something like that. But it's not stealing money from the government. It's taking money back that the government shouldn't have taken in the first place. That's right, dude. No. I mean, if you end up, if they have, if there's some department that has like this budget surplus of like millions of dollars to give out to people to dress like the Riddler, that should not have been taken in tax. Yeah. I'd

rather go to that guy than McKinsey. Nick, did you see the new Batman speaking the Riddler? I got to start watching. I'm saying, I got to do stand up again. What do you think? I hated it. I thought, I thought it was pretty goth. I don't, I don't know how I could ever enjoy it. Like I've, I've seen enough Batman. Yeah. No, exactly. It's just like we have, we already have every iteration of Batman that you could possibly need. Right. No, just accept it. This is the world. No, I was honestly surprised that Christopher Nolan was able to do anything with it after Tim Burton. It's like, all right, well, he gave it to some freak and he made this shit. And it's like, you know, for, for, especially at the time

and place that Nolan was like, what if Batman was for grownups? Yeah. You know, make like a, well, I mean, compared to this new movie, the Nolan movies look like jaunty and goofy. Oh, they look like a, they look like a, a Rolikan good time. Yeah. This is very gray and serious. No, they should do Batman in, you know, like in the theater and was it Maripole or whatever? And then he's just like trying to save like women and children from being killed by Russians. And then we find out later that actually that it was, it was a sort of a false flag by Zolensky. Well, in the new one, there's like an AOC stand in and then in like 4chan in Planetarist attack. And yeah, like, and like there's a scene where they're

talking about the Riddler and he's like, you know, plotting a terrorist attack on his like discord server or whatever. And they're like, they're like, he has 500 followers and I'm like, fucking lowbie. He's like, he's getting like likes and stuff. He's posting vlogs and getting likes and people are like, go off, like use a bump stock. So it's really, really fucking tells us a lot about how fucking society is. Yeah. Well, that's what I mean is they create this like skits like Batman is supposed to be an escape and now the nerds that like it, they have to go there and be reminded of social media and all of these things and like actual politics or whatever. No, put Batman on the

moon. He's speaking a fake version of Chinese, you know, James Cameron should do Batman. That's it. That's the only guy that should be given back any kind of fantasy stuff. He's about to drop avatar too. I would love I can't wait. They announced it like 15 years ago. And he's like he's like he's living in like a city he created in New Zealand. And I'm actually, I was like, like, let's say like, you know, a Russian American decided to just say fuck it. We're doing a full nuclear exchange. You know, like it's, you know, it's worth ending all human civilizations that like Ukraine can be free or whatever. Yeah. I truly think

that like the nucleus, the nucleus of humanity that would emerge from like a nuclear holocaust would just be the people currently making avatar in New Zealand. Right. Yeah. And like James Cameron will become like the god emperor of the new world. And I got to say, that would be that's a perfect, perfect outcome. You'd be starting you'd be starting you'd be restarting humanity with a much cooler origin than whatever like proto Indo bullshit we have now. Everything born out of like, what is it? Zoroast ism or like the turtle that's the world. I don't know. I imagine if it were, imagine if it were instead that avatar is real. I think God made the world in seven days cave paintings where people wearing fucking 3D IMAX. It's

pretty sick. Yeah. I would love that. And you know, James Cameron, like he's just about he's he's the American Napoleon, you know, like, like he's the only like man, like sort of with the vision and competence to execute a large scale project. No imagine if you went to see Avatar two and the plot is like, Oh, the space Republicans want to make it that they blew the gay avatars can't say gay in school, you know, they can put a gun in my mouth right now. Yeah, I want it to be the most childish commentary on on human interaction possible. I want people's tails to touch. Yes, but it looks like, you know, like fucking the cover of a yes album. It's prog. Yeah, right. It's I want to be stupid.

Yeah. And but it's like fucking it's fucking Frank Frazetta. You know, yeah. Yeah. James Cameron. I'm saying this from Wikipedia folks. I'm not. I'm not a smart man, but he said that he views filmmaking as war and himself as a general. He's correct. Sounds bad. He's correct. That's a badass. Okay. That's not even stolen Valor because he is he's so removed from whatever he point. He thinks he's making that he's not even steal. What does that mean that I see filmmaking is war and myself as no, like, like, I think in what plenty of times does war plenty of times. Like no, there have been like revolts in the crew. Yeah, because like he's like been crazy and he's like, yeah, he's like Napoleon. I see, I

see filmmaking as the cake and myself as the baker. I see making a film as a dog fight and all my actors as dogs and myself as Michael pick as the man who owns the dog fight. You know, the analogy I've always compared filmmaking to is it's a film is sort of like a vehicle and I'm the car maker, but by driving it, they also the drive any anytime you say that kind of thing on like unflinching like it is badass, even if it's stupid. I'm I'm hyped for avatar to I only saw avatar in the last like year or so because I didn't I didn't see it. I think I've said this on the show before, but I didn't see it because I knew I was about to break up with a girl and I didn't want to pay for two I max 3d tickets.

I was too cheap and I missed and then all my friends had seen avatar at that point. And so I like I missed the boat on a lot of shit that bothered me when I saw it because you know I was young and stupid, but stuff now that I really appreciate like when the Mac they have a Mac fight with a robot. That's cool. And the Mac has a combat knife. Yeah, try to come at night. Well, I mean like what happens when the Mac runs out of bullets? Yeah, I keep fighting. There's a knife for distinct from the rent. It doesn't just come out of like the arm. No, it's like it's achieved. Yeah, yeah, pick up his night. Yeah, yeah. Stuff like that that I'm like that doesn't make any fucking sense. But now that I'm old,

I'm like the less sense it makes the more I want to lean into this because that's what fucking entertainment should be because they took all the regular fantasy shit away from us. Yeah. What else? What were you saying? I forget. They should do Wally three where the people are what even fatter. Yeah, where the spaceship is sinking. So they make Wally too. It's somehow sinking in space, even though there's no gravity. It becomes so fat that they're a black hole. You've created gravity in space. Yeah, they're a planet now. The universe was like this. Okay, we got to create a new essential force in the universe to keep these people in check. That was a classic yo mama so fat thing that she has her own gravitational

pull. Yeah, yeah. That's the one that was there for like people doing the dozens like the smart kids school. Yeah. Yeah, your mom has some triple force. Yeah, technically doesn't everybody your mom pulls light into the center gravity and obliterates all atoms. Yeah, I used to think a young Neil deGrasse Tyson. I used to think the one where it's your mom is teeth are so yellow every time she closes her mouth, her stomach lights up. I used to think that was funny. Yeah. She's so yellow whenever she smiles, cars slow down. Oh, that's pretty funny. Yeah, like a car light. I guess that's cool. So what else what's going on in what with politics? More good stuff. Actually, I mean, the new story that I was paying attention

today is that the the state of Tennessee just passed a bill that would like add a new like a new tier for marriage, like a new tier of like a marriage license that like for straight people. But like so it's like it's like you can get a different marriage license for straight people only. But also they have done away with any age limit on like who you can marry. So if you're straight because you got a special license, you can marry a 13 year old and like that's actually like everyone's worried about grooming now. Introduce the bill has his wife is like 12. Yeah, no, he met her in high school when she was in high school. She was a fellow like she like, yeah, she's like selling Girl Scout cookies. Yeah, 47 years old. We don't

like like, you know, like the culture war and how like this, you could just just say and do anything now. And it just seems to me like like the the line is now is that like, you know, everyone, everyone's a groomer, everyone's grooming kids, right? And we got to stop them. Yeah. And how do you protect kids from groom being groomed? Marry them. Yeah. You know, like that. Exactly. Yeah, exactly. It's like it's so everything so convoluted that there's no way there's no rational in on like either side to be like, okay, well, this is groom. That makes sense. But then also the people like that's such an easy gimme. Yeah. Is to say like, okay, well, these people actually are pedophiles. But like, you know, like with

this guy, I guess his wife was like 18 or 19. And then you could just say it's it's weird and make fun of them. And it's like, you probably would be a pedophile. But then people want to have like an earnest problem with like, well, 19 year old woman, you know, there's a power dynamic there. It's like, so then what then what are you asking for? Do you want to raise the age of consent? Because if that's the case, then it's like, then you need to make that argument. It gets into this like weird territory of, you know, I'd like, like just advancing like a gray area into like early twenties for certain people. What it is, at some point, you have to just say it's okay for a fucking 45 year old to marry it.

But 22 year old, isn't it half your age plus seven? Isn't that the rule? I don't think it's a law, but I thought that was about cheating. I think that was about getting pussy from a younger woman. Yeah, but it is true that the way you stop grooming is by making them get married. Because like, if you watch the Michael Jackson documentary, what he did was he would just have a relationship with one of the boys and it was all lies. He never did anything. Sure. And then he'd find a new little boy and then like do all the same fun stuff with the new little boy and the last little boy would have his heart broken. Yeah, the thing is, I like that there's like, if you want to stop like, you know, like, like

groomers and people from like, this is actually abusing children and just make them get married because, you know, we all know once you get married, the sex goes pretty quickly. That's true. You get bored with it. You know, it sounds like my wife. Yeah, probably is the thinking. But Michael Jackson, yes, I don't like, I mean, I do think he fucked the kids, but I don't think it's like that falls into the umbrella of strictly like pedophilia, because he was such a weird freak fucked up thing. Anyways, you know, that it's like, it's almost like something that would be aesthetically considered pedophilia is an unrelated component of what, you know, it's in the same way that like, and this is this is really going to be

a departure, but like, you wouldn't use color to describe a flavor, you know what I mean? Yeah, you can have pasta sauce, and you can have fucking. So he was like a cranberry sauce and cranberry sauce look very similar. You know, in the same way that Michael Jackson having sex with children, and fucking, you know, Jeffrey Epstein doing it, both like similar in that they're the same color, same, but the substance in the flavor and what they're actually doing very much different. So Michael Jackson, no, that's not what happened. Well, yeah, what is your what is what is your brief of the defense of Michael Jackson here? What's the what's the what's the evidence you're mounting? I don't want to listen. I'm going

to get a lot of push back online for the gemstones fans. But everyone knows that Joe Jackson chemically castrated him at 11. Yeah, I mean, I've heard that. That's why his voice sounded like that. And so he was therefore incapable of engaging in sexual acts, which I'll in this is a documented fact in Italy. In the in the 1700s, the castratos were they were basically fucking Selena Gomez. They were they were the hottest guy. They were they were literally they were fucking sex symbols. And they would they would be fucked by a man and also have girlfriends who would like, you know, kind of like play on their their little undeveloped penis like an Oscar Maher weiner whistle. But like, I mean, you can

still achieve an erection to have been, you know, neutered castrated. They have children's genitals. Okay. Yeah. I don't know. Thing too is like it because your testosterone is what actually well, I didn't know that. Well, you're one of the smartest guy I know. But what makes your fucking one is that the endothelial joint likes things seal. Damn, you guys are being so smart right now. That's probably not the right word at all. I don't even know. But that we have a lot of doctors listening. It's it's it's your your nuts dropping that stops your that starts the process of you not going up in height. So you're fucking if you castrate somebody they end up very like tall and lanky because the regulatory systems to stop like,

you know, puberty growth aren't like they're broke. Essentially, man, I wish my balls dropped later so I could be over six feet tall. My balls dropped at like 17. So, but it didn't make me tall. Yeah. Kubla. That's because you're high estrogen. Yeah. Your body was producing a lot of scant traces of testosterone. Yeah. I guess technically the penis is there. But yeah, that's all testosterone supplements. Are they are they advertising on the podcast? All right. I mean, would that make would that make me like chimp out? Would that make me like pissed off? I don't know. Like I would make it would make you more of a man. I would I would finally be confident. I finally stand up to Nick and stop. I'm not a bug. The whole

dynamic of the show changes. The whole Adam's taking out a team. Yeah, we got to get on. We got to get a Rogan and then we can pick up some of those. Yeah. Yeah. No, I would love to. I would love to go on road. You're just an awesome guy. If you start doing testosterone and HGH and then just like just come back like just like when you record, you walk through the wall like the Kool-Aid man and then just start fucking dominating. I got to start getting more pissed. I got to start getting more pissed. You're right. Instead of just meekly suffering their abuse. But deputy, you know, and then I thought that if you get testosterone, I'm getting my arms cut off and replaced with weapons of some sort. Jack's arms. Gatling

gun. I was seeing Axel from Twisted Metal. Just a guy that's wheels. The black guy has been turned into a literal Axel. I mean, that was the best guy in Twisted Metal. Did you fuck with it? Yeah. I was always just funny. I was a crazy clown. Mr. Grimm. Who's at the clown? The motorcycle guy with the skull. That guy was badass. Ghost Rider. Ghost Rider. Yeah. I thought Mr. Grimm, Spectre, I fucked with. I confused it a lot with a vigilante eight. What's that? Twisted Metal? Yeah. It was a Twisted Metal knockoff. Oh, I was asking people about this the other day. Street Fighter 2. Who is your go-to character? Who did you fight with? Never. Never. Never fucked with Street Fighter. In fact, Johnny Cage.

The fighting games. The fighting, the only fighting game I ever got even remotely good at was Killer Instinct. Is that the one where you're like dinosaurs? No. That's Tekken. Tekken, yeah. Tekken as dinosaurs. There's one game that was like, it was just two dinosaurs fighting each other. I don't remember that. I think I know what you're talking about, but I don't know. No, Killer Instinct was, I don't know if there was a dinosaur. I think it might have been a raptor in Killer Instinct, actually. I've never heard of that game. Killer Instinct? No. No. I mean, yeah, I was just like, Street Fighter 2 was just like, that was the game like all my friends had. Everyone played it. I was never good at it, but I always played

Gile because I thought he was cool. Yeah. But I mean, he sucks. Yeah. Well, we would play it, do two Sonya blades against each other, pause it, and then. You're thinking of Mortal Kombat. But you were trying to pause it so you could see like a pixelated kid or something. You know, be able to sleep over and jack off into a fucking Gatorade bottle and, you know, then share it. Then pass it around. Go to Bar Misfil class the next day. You know, you know how we do. Will, you're the best guest. Yeah. I'm trying to find a picture of orchid from Killer Instinct in the game because they were a flowery guy. No, they really, they really drew her titties. They really made it put an effort into her

titties. Original. She was the Sonya blade of that game. Wait, do they have a bitch in Street Fighter? I mean, yeah, Chun Lee, Chun Lee. Oh my God. And Kami too. Yeah. She had ass. Kami, Chun Lee. And then there was the other one. Chun Lee had strong legs. She had all very, very strong legs. A big butt. Yeah. I love her. Smaller Chinese. What was her name? Smaller Chinese. There was another Chinese in Street Fighter. I don't know. Maybe she was Japanese. Street Fighter girls. And Kami was like female guy. Well, she was like a sort of a military, military style woman. Again, very strong legs. Gile was the Johnny Cage. Gile was, yeah, he was like the American commando guy. Yeah. He had like a big flat

top and they're basically the same thing. Yeah. Making Giles hair more and more like every iteration of like those characters would just be like describe the character to another guy without showing it to them and like you draw it and then we get more extreme like Giles hair. You ever see the Street Fighter animated movie? No, I don't think so. Really? Not bad. I mean, I've always seen the Jean-Claude Vedin, Raoul Julien, you know, Masterpiece. Yeah. That was the last movie he did, right? Raoul Julien. Yeah. Crazy. He had a good run. Well, folks, oh, damn, we're only at 55 minutes, I guess. So Raoul Julia, dead famously. Yeah. Kiss of the spider woman, right? Adam's family. Adam's family. Kiss of the spider family.

My family's overdrawn at the memory bank. Yeah. Adam's family values is one of the Oh, I love it. One of the funny great, great sequel. I haven't watched in a while. It was to the summer camp stuff. It's great. I was too afraid of that guy. That kid fucking was like threatening Shane Gillis or DMs. David Krumholt. Oh, God. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was he was Christina Ricci. He's like love interest and family values. Why? Why was he threatening something? He's like, you got something to say about Jews. Say to me, I'll spin your fucking eyes. You're talking about Chinese people. I don't know. I guess someone told David Krumholtz it was about Jews. He was saying something about the Jews. I like that

like old school like boomer getting mad at anti-semitism thing that people are making fun of Krumholtz on the Internet a couple of years ago because he got really fat. Dude, the picture. There's two pictures with his wife fucking this poor bitch. Then the side by side. But I think he just got fat for a role. Did he actually got fat for a role? But then it was the same thing. Jesse Plemmons. He got fat, got quote unquote fat for a role. Yeah. And now Jesus, what was that role? Was he playing comedian Amy Schumer in a movie? Yeah. Amy Schumer after 35 minutes in the microwave. He looks like a peep. He looks like a fucking peep. It's a fun experiment. Amy Schumer is a friend. Yeah, Adam. So I

think David Krumholtz is DMs. I would say Shane's a good guy. And he's never been anti-semitic to my face. Yeah, Krumholtz, I'm trying to squash this beef if you're listening. Yeah, it's like, this is him. This is him and his wife and like 20 fucking 15 or whatever or something. And then let me see if I can, I love finding like, there's one picture in particular. And that's him with his, he got shorter somehow. You got shorter. Yeah. Yeah. This poor woman. Wow. You know, I mean, I'm sure they're in love with each other. He's got millions of dollars or whatever. But if you're looking to cheat sister, you're going to fuck Krumholtz. No, I'm just going to recommend Stav. Oh yeah.

I'm just going to say you can fuck Stav if you want to. Yeah, you can hit Stav up. No, I mean, no offense lady, but I don't share my bitches. Stav loses tooth again. No, he, he fault, falsified that. That was a false flag. Yeah. Yeah. Yet another Stavros false flag. I texted him. I said, Oh my God, sweetie, are you okay? And he said, I still have my tooth. You fell for it. You stupid bitch. This is so funny. I guess he had like a year where he was handsome. I thought he was kind of good looking. No, he was like a goofy dork, you know, like goofy, cute. No, not because he was in other teen movies. Yeah. Like after Adam Sandler guys, because I remember playing Elf in a

movie. He was Elf in the Santa Claus. Yeah. Bernard, the elf. And he's like, Oh, there's not enough. We don't have, you know, I mean, he's like, Oh, it's just like befuddled dork. But I guess, yeah, there, whatever this is from whatever this movie, he was like, he was hot for a while. Sort of a heartthrob. Yeah. Sort of like, you know, approachable, you know, and the approachable, nice guy. That's the move. You got to have one year where you're hot and then you go right back to being fucking shit. Whenever I see Crumholtz and something, I'm happy. Then you go back, you go back there. Look at this. Who is that? That's him, dude. No way. Yeah. WWE. I don't know what he's at. That's him. Yeah, that's him, dude. Damn, dude.

That's crazy. No, he like destroyed his body. This is because yeah, he was hot. This is like, this is what people look like when they just like, they get like that sheet, that heavy sheet of fat on their front of their torso. Or it's like, you know, you're just, it's lights out for you, I guess. Dude. Well, what, what, what can I say? David Crumholtz, come on the show. Yeah, slide on those DMs. Come here. I'll squash the, I'll squash the beef on Shane's behalf for you. Yeah. We love you as an actor. Yeah. Anytime you should, who's that other guy, Rob, something? Rob Van Winkle. No, no lies. Anytime he's in something, I just, I like, I just like him. Rob. Like when he's fuck Rob low, the guy from office space. Yeah. What's his name? Oh,

fucking. I want to find out something bad about Jason Sudakis. You know, the Ted last, I think, you know, it's funny, all the people that like Ted last, so they're probably all the, so the most hardcore, like pro Ukraine Ron, Ron Livingston. I see him. Oh, he's wonderful. Wonderful. You're right. This guy, I love you. You're right. There's, there's a huge crossover between people who are the way they stepped in it with the fucking whatever this azov battalion. You know, like it turns out the one time they expressed support for a group of people, it turns out to be like, not only Nazis, but like, like fucking Indiana Jones, a cult level. They have like tattoos of the holy grail on their arm. And it's like, you know,

but not just kill all the Jews, but do it with fucking ghosts. Yeah. Be spooky about it. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Ted last, so giving a motivational speech to the guys who are like fucking opening up the Ark of the Covenant. Yeah. We find that that like Jason Sudakis is like not only raping children, but like doing some Moloch shit with them. That would be amazing. That would truly be, you know, he just gets caught with an infant and he's got a ruger up its ass. Nick, even following all the guys like on Reddit, who have like gone over to join like an international brigade and then just get killed immediately. No, but one of the funniest things I've ever seen. I mean, it's garlic corgi. I can't remember. Yeah. Yeah. I love garlic. I love garlic corgi.

We did a picture of just some fat dumbass with like those like, like, like not transition glasses, but like, like very light purple prescription lens crafters and like wearing like the comms, headset armor, just like neck fat hasn't shaved in a week. And they just said, RIP Michael Tracy. And it's like, I can't describe why it's funny because I mean, it sort of looks like Michael Tracy, but just like the way the headsets kind of just sort of like just barely fucked up. And there's just like a sloven slovenly nature to the thing that's like, if for whatever reason, Michael Tracy was there to be like, actually, the Ukraine thing is gay or, you know, whatever take Michael Tracy would have on. It's like, actually, it's just looking for a way to be

annoying. That's exactly how we would address. The Carvel was out of napkins in downtown Kiev. The Carvel ice cream was out of napkins in downtown Kiev. I wonder what college students think about this. All right, guys. Okay. It's been a fun episode. Thanks for coming on, Will. We love you. We love you. Bye. Until next time.