The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - MIA KHALIFA Talks Viral Fame, Fatwa, Being the Goat

Episode Date: October 1, 2025

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Do you have autism? Yeah. Everyone... It's all... It's a spectrum. No, I don't think I am at all. It's like no one's fully straight. No, I don't think I'm autistic at all.

Oh! I cry everything. Yeah, yeah. It used to be called Rude. I'm dead. Rood. Do you remember Rude? Do you remember Rood?

They've rebranded. Yeah. Now someone could be like... They change their logo, like, Jaguar. Someone could be a fucking dickhead and they're like, he's just, he's so autistic. And I'm like, I don't care. What am I? I need to read the DSM, too. I'm not a doctor

Welcome to the Adam Friedland Show, guys. It's Adam Friedland. First off, as always, I want to thank our channel members for supporting the show. If you'd like to become a member, you can click the link in the description. You get early access to all of our episodes, discounts on merch, and if you subscribe to the second or third tiers, you'll get your name in the credits of every episode of this fine program. Also, there's a link to our Patreon if you prefer supporting the show through Patreon.

Also, I'd like to note that our merch store has been restocked. Go to Adam Freedland. Show to check out our stuff. We have T-shirts, hats. They sold out real quick last time. Get them before they're gone again. My guess this week is media personality and influencer Mia Khalifa. Mia, or Sarah, as I know her and all of her friends, that's where her friends call her. First came to prominence in 2015 for her brief stint as an adult film actress.

She quickly became a global phenomenal. Dominon, earning her the title of most searched adult actress for both 2016 and 2018. And now, of course, this is the part where I do some hilarious bit before I show you my interview. But let me be clear, I'm not going to go there this week. Folks, as my star rises, the target on my back gets bigger and bigger, and the margin for air gets smaller and smaller. Pierce Morgan is watching everything I do. The man is relentless and dogged, and I have to be mindful and careful not to lose everything that I've worked so hard for.

I'm fairly certain also that I think I'm being followed. I don't know if it's peers. I think it could be a member of my family. Anyway, guys, this might be tough for some of you, but it's become clear that my days of being an immature baby for an adoring audience are over. I'm an adult now. I have to be. It's true my guest this week was a beautiful woman, but as you'll see, I treated her like I would any other guest, be it hot guy, ugly woman, or hip-hop and R&B legend. So if you've come here for nasty jokes, you can turn off now.

This is an adult show for an adult audience. I'm no longer making baby stuff for babies. I'm in the adult industry now. So pour yourself a glass of wine, maybe. sit back on a piece of white furniture and enjoy my thought-provoking conversation with Mia Khalifa. This episode is sponsored by Ro. Roe Sparks are a two-and-one prescription treatment for guys who need a secret weapon.

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That's RO. slash T-A-F-S for $15 off your first order. Ladies and gentlemen, cultural icon media personality, Meiko Leaf, everyone. Big clap! Hi. Nice to meet you. Thank you for coming. Thank you for having me.

Your tissues are there. Thank you. She brought tissues because of my boogers during Sarah Jessica Park. It's so embarrassing. No, it's not. Do you have a change? change of a diaper for okay why do we start this way thank you for coming on I guess like so you know I how do we start this thing like what where do we start

we start at the beginning right at the beginning yeah okay thousand BC no I want to start a what is the date today of course oh happy 9-11 it's not to stop it with your edge Lord jokes okay oh my God no okay we're not gonna start that way but you moved to America shortly after or shortly before 9-11 shortly before okay You are from Lebanon, right? You're born there, and you moved here, what? You were 11 or something? I was 8, 2001.

And you moved to the greater D.C. area, right? And you moved during a time of, like, Islamophobia, anti-Arab. I guess it was always there, but yeah. I think it was escalated after 9-11, and now it's kind of back, right? Yeah. It's kind of vintage. Cyclical. It feels like a little bit, like, it feels like a little Toby Keith, like, kind of post-9-11 moment we're having again right now.

We'll stick a boot in your ass. Stick a boot in your ass. Kind of a good song. It's so fucking good. You know, I love this bar also. Great song. Yeah, what else? I love country music, actually.

I do too. Yeah, what's your favorite? Florida-Georgia line? You like that one? No, I like... Baby, you're a star, you make me wanna roll my window down and crud. You know that one? It's actually good.

You want to harmonize with me? No, Zach. He's teaching me harmony right now, Zach the intern. intern how to harmonize yeah yeah he's actually we we I shouldn't say it on the camera should I I'm just turn away from the camera okay we do Friday afternoon choir me me and the four employees that's so beautiful all of you just stay like what is there pedestals do you I grew up Jewish so I am Jewish but like I always wanted to do like Christian songs like oh that's so amazing grace it seems so

beautiful you get to do that at church so now I make like a virgin is also a beautiful I don't think that's from church I do is it yeah I think it's about it's about Mary like a virgin touch for the very first time I yeah about getting your pussy tough no her being touched by the power of God like a prayer is that is that a that's about a blow jobs is that is that Madonna yeah my mom my mom used to play that in the car and I used to ask her what it was about and she said stop talking about you moved to Montgomery County Maryland yeah right what Gayther's Gaithersburg, Maryland.

Mia, Sarah Mia is from the same town as Mr. Nick Mullen. Give it up for him, everyone. My former partner. Where did you go to high school? I don't know. You don't have that all the top of your head? I think he went to community college. I think he just skipped high school,

went straight from middle school to community college. I think he got an early GED and then community college. I think he was a bad boy. I went to military boarding school. Yeah, yeah. So what led you to that? You were a bad kid? smoking reefer really your parents caught you smoking trees mine did too yeah but

they'd never send me to the army what army did they send you to I know literally it was the feeding school for West Point it was an army it was like army not were you good at the army when you I was so good really I was so good I loved it so much what do you have to do like make your bed and stuff yeah and I still can do hospital corners you could bounce a quarter off of what really yeah you make your bed every day now because the army no I like getting back into a bed with like crumpled sheets what What, like, what is like, the, so you went for the rest of high school to a military school?

Mm-hmm. So you didn't really have, like, a typical high school experience? I feel like I had more of a normal experience there than at public school. Did you speak English before you moved to the States or you only spoke Arabic? No, I spoke French in Arabic. French, yeah, because I went to a French school. So how did, like, what moment did you feel like you'd integrate it into American culture, like, after you moved to your elementary school? I'll let you know.

You still don't feel like it. I mean, you have an American accent. Yeah. And Arab people see me as American, not Arab. Yeah, right. For me, like my parents come from a different country and I also like, you like sports and films, right? Yeah.

And like that was one way that I kind of learned American culture. Me too. That's why I embedded myself so deeply into sports, I felt like I was, like it gave me something to talk to the kids about at school the next day. So I very much obsessed over football and basketball, and that's how I kind of found my little friend groups. Yeah, yeah. advocated publicly to change the name back to Redskins?

No. Is that true? No, I hope not. You said I wanted to be bullets and redskins again. Okay, bullets? Bullets we can talk about. That's on the table. You played lacrosse as well?

That's very mid-Atlantic, right? It's very white. Did you put bitches on the deck when you were playing? No, I did not. I actually got a concussion and now there's a little hole in my head. Do you want to feel it? Yeah, I guess so. Oh, God, that's disgusting.

You want to feel something disgusting. On my head? Here. What is that? It's fucked up, no? Are you okay? It's, I've just had it my whole life. It's like a massive disgusting mold.

Oh. Yeah. That's why if I go bald, I'm... Oh yeah, I can't go bald either. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't go bald as well. Yeah. Thank God, dude.

That's my biggest fear, actually. I had a dream the other night that I woke up bald. Oh my God. Yeah, yeah. And I was like, what do I do? Get a wig! I think I would go rug. Fuck yeah.

I would go turkey. What does that mean? Oh, too turkey? Have you been there before for a procedure? No, I do all of mine in L.A. What procedures have you had? You've had your schnots? I've got my nose done, yeah.

Got my implant. I have breast implants. What else have I done? I mean, other than like the little injectables here and there. I'm thinking about getting a BBL myself, but I would only go to South America for that. Got to go to Columbia. Yeah. Well, I get a lot of like Instagram reels for, uh...

BBL promotion? For like, I don't get no why it's on my Instagram, but it's like, no, no, for hair. replacement and Columbia treats you have great hair though I know thank God thank God all right um I saw uh I went through your letter boxed oh God and I was actually upset by one of them which one Harry met Sally oh wait what did I say about that one you gave it three stories I know it's a three star it's a three star okay but a three star and a like is different than a just a three star what are you talking about a three star and a like there's a difference it's very nuanced

You're really, no, it's just, it's one of the worst movies. No, no, it's, the reason why? It's a very upsetting movie to me. Why? Because he doesn't deserve her. Why doesn't he deserve her? Because his face looks like Nyoki. Every joke he's telling she's laughing at, and it's not funny.

He's like doing like, hello, mammy. And she's so gorgeous, and she's like, ha, ha, ha, ha. I'm like, that's not funny. He's being disgust. Isn't that Nancy Myers's fault? That's, that's a fault of a script. I just don't like him. And then sometimes I think, like, like,

When I have a girlfriend, is that what it looks like? Does it look like Harry and Sally? No. No, I think it does. I think I'm, because my greatest fear is that I am like that Billy Crystal in that movie. What? Absolutely not. Disgusting, yeah.

Have you seen me do my Jasmine character, Sally? What else is he in also? That's the only thing. City Slickers? City Slickers 2, Curly's Gold. And City Slickers 3? No, is there a 3? No.

But those are the only two you named city slickers and city slickers, too. So wait, so how would you describe yourself in high school though? Like, were you popular? No, not at all, not at all. I weighed 170 pounds. I had a young girl? A hundred 70? Yeah.

You're a big girl. Yeah. I was a big girl. Really? Yeah. Oh, okay. And so then like when did, like when did you lose weight, I guess? Post fat is like kind of a genesis of evil, I feel like.

Yeah. Like between 19 and 20. 19 and 20. Yeah. I feel like a lot of like, like, that guy Richard Spencer, do you remember that old right guy? I was like, that guy definitely was like 250 pounds and now he hates. Oh, because he's never, yeah. Oh, no, I don't hate minorities.

I'm just because I was fat. There's a hate that's in a lot of them boys' hearts. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's like a little resentment. I think so, yeah. I have a lot of friends that like grew up fat and they're like, they think of themselves still as fat. You don't understand how hard it is for us.

Oh, no, that stays with you for a long time. And that's why you seek validation. Really? Yeah. Really? You gotta go to therapy. Like if you lose weight? For fat?

Yeah. No, for real. Because then you're suffering. Then in your head, you're still behaving like, that's, oh, you time it when the camera's on. Stop it. It's embarrassing. It's tough.

What's the a straight for? Be a man. Smoke a cigarette. I can't do it in here. I'm not going to smoke both. Okay. Yeah, I feel like that's a tough addiction to have food, right? Because it's like.

It is. And that's what it is. An unhealthy relationship with food. Right. It's like you can't quit food. No, and to be completely transparent, I'm on Ozempic now because the fucking, like, mental battle of, like, battling with binging or, like, borderline anorexia and, like, over-controlling or, like, over-working out. That takes care of all of that. What does Ozambic do?

If you have any food, you vomit it out? No, you just... Or you crap it out immediately? I... I don't know. The way I react on it is I eat when I'm hungry, and I don't crave... things that I shouldn't, that I shouldn't be eating. So I just have a normal relationship with food now. I don't eat as like a coping mechanism. It must be tough. Yeah, because it's like, it's like

you have to have a healthy amount of crack every day, right? Just a little bit, which is basically what high school kids are on. On what? Crack? I don't know, isn't that the same thing? No, I'm just saying like you can't, if you have a food addiction, you have to just have like, it's not like you can't go cold turkey. You have to just have a little bit of crack. Yeah, yeah. It's a little Oreo here and there. Crush it up, sniff it. Growing up, post-9-11, like, what was your experience, like, with prejudice, you know, in, especially in the DMV? Like, what were your experiences after a movie to America? Well, my nickname was Sand N-word. What? Really? Yeah. I think, me and the other Indian kid in school. No, it's not, it's not. But we were also in,

like, elementary middle school, so like, you know? They used that one in elementary? Oh my God you're Lebanese in Australia they're like so racist like I was a I was in an Uber and someone's like you don't want to go down there it's a good accent it's a bunch of Labos and I was like oh my God what I was like I was like lesbians and he's like no Labos Lebanese and I was like there's like four million of them on earth and you have a slur for it oh my God lebos I was like you guys are the best at slurs yeah that's hilarious they need to shorten everything no I've never heard it yeah it sounds endearing I like it It's kind of cute, right?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's like a, yeah, it's like a beanie baby name. Yeah. Look at a little lebe. Yeah. Yeah. I think that like I've watched, I've like done a lot of research and watched a bunch of interviews with you.

And it's kind of like you have kind of a thing that you're asked about constantly. But what's more interesting, I think, is before your kind of viral success and then after your viral success. It's very interesting. Like you only worked in the industry for what, like a matter of weeks? A couple months, yeah. A couple months. Yeah, three months. And what was, what was like, how much money did you make while you were doing it?

Like not very much money. $11,000. $11,000, right? Was there a concept at the time that what the work you were doing was like a success or like? No, no. And there was no intention for anything to be successful that wasn't ever the intent. It was, I mean, honestly, it was just extremely poor judgment and extremely poor foresight. Like, I didn't think further ahead past where I was in that moment at 20, which, as I mentioned earlier, when you've never had male attention in your entire life.

You just lost weight? Yeah. Really? Yeah. Oh, interesting. And after I had lost the weight, I got a boyfriend? No, I got, well, yes, I was, yes, I was in a relationship at the time. But, no, I got, I got my breast augmentation.

And so everything came at once. So it was like the movie, she's all that. It's like you took your glasses off and you're the weird art girl and then you've taken the glasses. Exactly, when she's coming down, oh I love that movie. With Freddy Prince Jr.? Yeah, what happened to him? I think he's not problematic. He's on Little St. James.

What? No, I don't know. Oh my God. What happened if Freddy Prince Jr.? Isn't he married to? Yeah. Galane Maxwell. No, leave him out of this.

They're unproblematic. Who's he married to? Sarah Michelle Geller. Yes. What? Yeah. He got Buffy? No, he got his.

No. They were both in Scooby Doo. Oh, my God. He got his Scooby Tree. No, he got Daphne. Daphne. Valma's like, oh, brother. Oh, brother.

Where are my glasses? Oh, brother. Okay. I guess, um. I know. That was Scooby. Okay, anyway. I think that's, so none of the rabbis that were on set said like this is going to be huge.

No one said that at all? No, but I did tell them that they're going to get me killed. Why? By who? What do you mean? family? No, no, no, just by, in general, when it was, um, when I was told what I was going to be wearing and what I was going to be doing. Oh, that thing. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. The hijab. Yeah. I think it's, like, interesting. It's, like, I was thinking about how to handle it. And, like, you know, normal Adam's like, oh, I don't know what that is. But, like, I think, yeah, in a real sense, probably, like, every guy you've met, and a lot of women you've met are, like, are familiar with it, you know?

And it's just, like, you became a viral sensation. But, like, what I was wondering is, like, to what extent, like, whether or not you realize that this has, like, become incredibly fame. So at that moment, I still thought that no one was ever going to find out about this. Right. But I think the way it happened was very just circumstantial. It was very like, it was just lightning in a bottle because of everything that was happening in the world at the time. Charlie Hebdo had just happened.

Me Too had just really taken off. There was a lot of social things going on that really were the reason why I was a part of that. and why it kind of exploded the way it did. You're from an immigrant family, like so am I, right? Like, was one of your concerns that it would cause a rift in a traditional immigrant family? Not necessarily, because I did not think anyone would ever find out. So everything happened very, very quickly. And subsequently, did it cause tension in the family?

Yeah, yeah, we were estranged for a long time after that. Right. I guess, like, you were telling me on the phone, like, you got a job. So, like, after getting out, like, you left on your own terms? Yeah. It was only a matter of a couple months. Yeah, after everything kind of happened like that, I mean, obviously, yeah, that wasn't the intention, and that is not what I wanted to do or be doing.

I basically just had my early 20's slutty phase in front of everybody in the world. But you were telling me you got a job. I did, yeah, I was a bookkeeper at a construction firm. And is that when it dawned on you? Like, what was the moment where, like, it dawned on you that, like, every, that the world was like that you were famous I felt like a burden at at the office because any any clients who would come in anytime I would have to go on to a job site anytime I would have to do anything that involved interacting with other people who

didn't just work in the office with me it was it was a huge distra like not not a distraction but like I realized that I can never work a normal job again what were the guys doing were they like yeah they're busting in their pants every guy walked in no but there was like whispers and talks and you know what I mean and it did it cause you to be paranoid or like it caused you like yeah there was a lot of instances where like I just had interactions with people that I realized wow my life is not the same I can't go to the grocery store I can't go to the laundromat I can't do any of these things and and like how did you process that like stress that that put you under

I didn't process it for a really long time. I didn't start therapy until like 2016, 2017, and that's when I started processing it. But until then I was just lashing out on anybody who would cross my boundaries, even though I didn't know what my boundaries were quite yet. And it caused you to lose trust in people. And did it affect your sex life? Yes, very much so. Very much so. Yeah. And it still does. You think so? Yeah, absolutely. I can't even, like, mentally get past somebody wanting to be with me for the novelty or for that reason. So I'd much rather just be alone.

I've been in two long-term relationships since then, and that's it in the last 10 years. I remember there being a response in the Arab world. Yeah. You received fatwas, is that right? Yeah. I mean, I don't know if it's an official one. but I'm not going to... What's an official fatwa?

I think when the government does a press release and like officially announces it. And there's a seal, they get a notarized? Right? I feel like they need to be notarized. It worked out for Rushdie, right? He gets hot girls because of the fatwa. Really? Where are my hot girls? I got one.

He got, what's her name from, what's her name? Top Chef. Padma? He got Padma, Lakshmi. Wait, gee, I love her so much. There's an episode of Curb where he's like, yeah, this guy's cleaning up because of the fatwa. Oh my God.

When's my turn. And your fame is sustained. That's what's interesting is that you went from virality to like proper fame, right? Around 2017, is that correct? Around 2017, what? You reopened your Instagram account. 2016, yeah. 2016.

What was the impetus behind that decision? That was at the same time that I left the construction firm and decided to be literally an influencer. Yeah. My goal was to reopen Instagram because ISIS sympathizers has had a had hacked my Instagram, so Instagram shut it down. Isis did? Yeah.

They were posting, like, propaganda. So Instagram immediately shut it down, and I didn't have an Instagram for like a year, and I worked a normal job and all of these things. So yeah, I reopened Instagram, moved to Austin, Texas. Oh, nice. Comedy of Mothership, yeah. Yeah, exactly. And yeah, just tried to be an influencer.

Did you have like a, like, kind of management or like other people? No, I haven't had management until three years ago. You can't trust these people. No, it's not that. They're so annoying. They're like, take pictures of yourself, looking sexy, and put it in GQ, and every comedian's going to make fun of you, Adam. Yeah, hold the mic this way. They'll love that.

You just lay on the ground and just twirl the wire around your head. And every comedian's going to just shit on you on every group chat. No. So wait, but you've been remarkably successful, right? You've become kind of like a media personality and like a cultural figure, right? in a lot of your interviews I've noticed that you talk there are two words that are like kind of come up and one you talk about shame and then but you talk about regret right like can you like talk about shame first of all and like what your understanding is

I'll give us a soliloquy about shame go off go off queen oh my god I'd love to hear it's such like a visceral human emotion I think I think it's I think deep down behind every negative emotion, there's a layer of shame there. And shame is a really, really difficult thing to get past because along with shame comes guilt and comes regret and comes all of these other emotions that are just, they're very overwhelming and they feel suffocating. And you feel very trapped when you're dealing with shame or trying to work through it. And shame is something to be to overcome, is that what you're saying? Yeah, I believe so. It's a negative emotion, right? I think it can also be a positive one.

Like if you have no shame, you probably are not a good person. You should have a little bit of shame sometimes. And what's the difference in your mind between shame and regret, I guess? I can, I regret things that I'm not ashamed of. Like, I regret speeding and getting a ticket. Because you're being a bad citizen, right? If you cut someone off in traffic. No, I don't regret that.

You don't regret that? No. Everyone gets their turn getting a ticket. So you have no shame you're saying? Not in that instance. But if I were to be pulled over for not using a turn signal, I would have regret, not shame. Okay. I mean, you've become an incredibly impressive and successful person.

So how do you manage shame and regret in relation to your instant virality? Therapy. Therapy. Therapy. I've worked through that for years, and I'm still working through it, but the battle isn't as tough as it was seven years. seven years ago now it's just maintaining yeah I don't know and reminding myself like I don't need to carry that guilt I made a mistake I was a kid everybody makes mistakes everything is fine I didn't kill anybody you didn't make your money

mining blood diamonds I mean I think like you probably you didn't do it I think you didn't do anything any harm no in fact you mean you made some folks feel all right oh my God no so I mean like Honestly, it's not like a net negative on society, right? Like, no, but there are people who, like, I don't give a fuck what the incells on the internet think. But I do give a fuck about what Fatima 713, you know, thinks because she's being called Mia Khalifa, but she's deeply religious, and it makes her feel like she's being over-sexualized. So, like, that gives me guilt and shame. You're a good, you're still, you could be a good person.

like you don't own a rubber you're like you still have a chance to be a good person I mean you don't own a rubber plantation in Africa in the Congo no I'm not mining for right you didn't like take advantage of anyone like you I don't know you just like I don't you make six million dollars a month no so is it no that's that's crazy I wouldn't be here if I did you wouldn't be here absolutely not you would never see me again I would be a ghost you would never see me again what would you be doing if you had like a billy a building a moat a moat I would buy sports team if you had six million you think you can buy a sports team with no a

billy if I had a billy yeah oh yeah I'd build a moat I build a moat where in Florida Florida no that's a Miami I do do you have like a you would you put like you know sharks and stuff in there no I'd put crocodiles those are way more realistic oh that's kind of in this day and age a little tough I would buy a sports team what what's what sport I would buy like a shit soccer team and do like what a what the guy from it's always sunny and Ryan Reynolds have done. What? They have a soccer team. They have a soccer team and then the whole town likes them and they do shots with the Welsh guys in the town. Oh, you just want

friends. A lot of friends. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. You want more. That's what it sounds like you want. Who's your best friend? Well, Samantha. Samantha? Samantha. Samantha? Hi. Samantha is your best. What's like, what's your guy's vibe as a, as a crew? You and Samantha. Me and Samantha? You do face masks? We actually see each other like once a year. She lives in Boston. Oh, come on.

I see my friends all the time. They just happen to be my employees. She knows more about me than anyone else. I talk to her more than anybody else. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Well, I don't know.

I was trying to think like actually, it's kind of an interesting question. It's like for you to have gained success for such a short amount of time doing something and then walking away on your own terms, Is there any, like, comparison in sports, art, literature, like, film? It's actually, it sounds like it would be, there would be an easy answer, and it's taken me two weeks to figure it out.

There's got to be a one and done. Try. I think I found the answer. Yahoo. No, no, you have to guess. Okay, hold on, hold on. You know sports too, so. Yeah.

But it's not, I won't say that it is or isn't sports. Jordan and baseball. he still he stunk at baseball also he left because of gambling and he killed his father okay can he killed his father it doesn't matter I wouldn't you did he that check that that makes him the goat okay wait think let's let's I want you to guess because it's very it's tough and it can't be trying to think of a director who's only made one film it it can't be so James Dean like made like three movies Hansen Hanson they didn't walk away from music they probably kept

They just became... Tracy. Chapman? Yeah. Yeah. How many albums? Yeah. How many albums?

Not even one. Was it just a single? She didn't just make fast car. She did that one. What else does she do? I'll look it up right now on the iPad. I don't think that's right. There is, okay, there is one sports comp,

but I don't think it works perfectly. Who? Jim Brown, maybe. Oh my God. He just left to be a civil rights icon and an actor. Okay, I want you to... Okay, here's the clue. It's in literature.

Oh, who wrote one, no. It's one of the... Oh, Homer. Homer wrote the Ili- Oh, fuck, he did too! And yeah, that shit is like mad long, too. That's not a couple months. It doesn't have to be a couple of months,

but it has to be like a short amount of time. We don't know how fast he wrote it. Are you going to interview him? You should. Okay. It's one of the best books ever. We all read it in school. We all read it in school.

Yeah, we did. It's got a great message. Wait. 96 to present she's been making albums. Tracy Chapman has nine albums. You're lying on her ass. Lying on freaking Tracy's ass. Wait, then why did she come out of retirement for that, for that performance?

What do you mean retirement? Not retirement, but it was like her first, like, you know, it was a big deal because, like, she had gone away and she didn't, like, she left the public eye. Yeah, it was a big deal that she came back. She left your eye because you didn't see. I just stopped looking. I closed my eyes. Keep up with her.

Those eye doctors, man, I'm telling you. Okay, it's a book we all read, I'd say probably ninth grade. Ninth grade? We were at Catcher in the Rye. We read. Okay. No, J.D. Salinger has met. Salinger went crazy.

He didn't walk away. That was a... No, but he also has many... Franny and Zoe is just as good. That's F. Scott Fitzgerald. Oh shit. No, it's not. Oh, fuck.

Is it? Is it? Is it Salager? Yeah. Who? Oh, shit. No, Salinger. It's Salinger.

Yeah. So F. Fitzgerald made... He did Great Gatsby. Which is the great American novel, but he did four books and 20 years of making, doing books. So it doesn't count. But you're close. You're in the, you're so close right now. It's not of mice and men.

I read that last week, and I know that. What did you think about that one? Lenny? I'm going through all of, Lenny, I just want to pet the Lenny's. Oh my God, yeah. So scary. He didn't know his own strength. I know, poor guy.

No, tell me, tell me. You're so close. Think about it. It's a great lesson for kids to have. Oh, um, um. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

The one about the dystopian... No. Oh. The giver? No. Come on, we're close. We're right there. The alchemist?

No. What is it? Okay. Tell me, please. I'll tell you a character. Okay. Boo. Oh my god.

Wait, no, she wrote multiple books. No. Boo Radley. One and done. She only wrote to Kill a Mockingbird? And then they released a second one a couple years ago, but people are like, that's half fake. Oh, I enjoyed it.

Because I love to kill him. I love, yeah, Harper Lee. You're one of the greatest artists of all time. I'm Harper Lee. I'm Harper Lee. I'm Harper Lee. I'm Harper Lee. Or you're Vince Young University of Texas, but...

I'll take either, actually. No, but he washed out in the league. It doesn't count. I didn't wash out in the league. Yeah, Waguan, everybody. Let me tell you about the online cannabis company that's revolutionizing the way we deal with life's challenges from sleepless nights to stress-filled days.

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T-A-A-F-S at checkout to save 20% off your first order What so like in terms of your career currently Like do you feel fulfilled in your career? Like what are your like motivations moving forward Like do you want to make a movie? You like movies I do What kind of movie you want to make like a Harry Potter song? What's your number one movie?

My number one movie of all time? Uh-huh. Train spotting. Come on. Actually, come on. Vertigo. Actually. Okay, not number one ever, though.

Yeah. Okay, number one ever, and the only reason I'm not saying it is because it sounds way too, like way too new, but... Ask her. Oppenheimer. Ever? I saw it 12 times in IMAX 70 millimeter. Oh, that's... 12.

I traveled to three different states. That's 36 hours. Three. Yeah. And that doesn't include streaming and regular IMAX? That's your best ever? Ever. But it's because I'm autistic and was obsessed with the annola gay as a kid.

You have autism? Yeah. Yeah. Everyone, it's always everywhere. It's a spectrum. No, I don't think I am at all. It's like no one's fully straight. No, I don't think I'm autistic at all.

Oh. I cry everything. Hmm. Yeah, yeah. When it, it came around like six years ago? Autism? Yeah. Because of the vaccines.

It just dropped. Just kidding. It used to be called Rude. I'm dead. Rood. Remember Rude? Do you remember rude? They've re-branded.

Remember, rude. Yeah. They changed their logo, like, Jaguar. Someone could be a fucking dickhead, and they're like, he's just, he's so autistic. And I'm like, I don't care. What about, I need to read the DSM 2? I'm not a doctor. You could be an eye doctor if you tried, though.

It's not a real doctor. Exactly. We talked about this before the episode. Don't stop trolling me. They're just glasses sellers. Do you have a prescription in yours? What do you think I am? A freaking liar?

My integrity is all I have. The audience trust me more than they trust anyone in. than they trust anyone in the news media these days you're a journalist no I'm not a journalist you think about like what you would have done had like had you like just gone to college yeah all the time what I'd be in the fucking guts of the Smithsonian Museum yeah like like in the basement in the yeah like like a just filing things away no because you need to be an archaeologist for that I would have been archaeology no I have no interest in that I have interest in you would have

been a file clerk data collection and filing yeah oh you are autistic Proper autism. That sounds like the suckiest thing ever. No, no. Are you kidding? You get to work in the basement. No one gets to talk to you. There's no windows. It's a dream. That sounds really scary. No, it's amazing. I used to have to do filing. Do you know how many colors the Smithsonian has in their possession that don't exist anymore? Now.

What was that question? How many colors? They are in possession of 150 colors that are no longer in existence. The human head weighs 15. weighs 15 pounds. Have you seen Jerry McGuire? 16 and a half? I'm kidding. Jerry McGuire, that kid?

Isn't Jerry McGuire show me the money? Yeah, of course. Oh, I've seen that. Sports. But I thought you were calling me autistic, so I assumed rain. No, the little kid goes, they had to raise 15 pounds. Was that Stuart Little? It was Stuart Little.

Yeah, I remember the movie. It was the mouse. No, it was that kid with a glass. Yeah. I hate that. I know his name. I know his name. Jonathan Lifnicki.

I hate him. I got that. Wow. What a pull. Greatful. Trainspotting not a good movie. Trainspotting is a phenomenal movie. Is your issue with Danny Boyle or with great acting?

It's just a mess, so it's good art? Have you read the book? Oh no, I can't read. I don't know. The glasses are thick. No, no, I do with listening. Oh, okay, so train spotting, you can't, well, you probably could. I read it. It's written phonetically in the Scottish accent.

So it's amazing. And there's like a key in the back for all of the Scottish slang. So there's a lot of work? So like, D. Yeah. Have you ever read House of Leaves where you have to like turn the book around as you're reading it? Is it? Yeah.

There's like some pages that are like written around the corner. Yeah. Who wrote that? I can't remember. I've never read that at all. Not Harper Lee. You kind of are, Harper Lee. You should change your bio, the Harper Lee of...

Are you kidding? I am going to rest on that laurel for the rest of my life. I kind of think like maybe it's kind of dope. I love that. I love to kill a mockingbird. mockingbird um yeah I love it too I mean that's I've kind of modeled myself after a boo Radley my career boo after after boo okay um I think I think like um so you think that like what

you studied like data collection science kind of stuff yeah and then that's what I would want that's what I would want to do and do you would you have considered that like a better alternative at certain points or I think that's very that's that's that's up to that's up for debate yeah I think so you're rich I am your proper successful no you live in Miami yeah big ass how you got on the water no no star island no I live in like essentially a condo but with a backyard do you like like what's your crew in my you like living there I my crew is two people two people yeah I don't love living there who's your

My two girlfriends. Her? Boston. Can't get her to move to Miami. Why don't you move to Miami with your best friend? She has children. They can move too. How old are your kids?

Yes, Sam. They're under three? They're under three? Yeah. Mamacita. She's a mommy. If they move to Miami, they'd love it. They are really, they'd suffer.

Whatever. They'd be fine. They'd just do Molly when they're 11. They get over and they become... Oh my God, that's literally how kids in Miami grow up. I know. It's crazy. I grew, I went to college with some of those kids and they really like, they were like...

Where'd you go to school? GW. Oh, right. You've since become like a fashion person, right? Thanks. Do you like that world? Yes. That, yeah, I do. You're a designer?

Yeah. I have a jewelry. What's your line called? Shetan. Shetan? Is that French? No, it's Spanish. No, it's Arabic.

Arabic. Yeah, it means devil. Have you been back to Lebanon in the last couple years? No. Are you allowed to? I'm not not allowed to, but I don't think it would be the smartest decision to go somewhere where I get a lot of threats from. It's difficult there.

Yeah. Are you in contact with anyone that's like, or like, do you feel like an obligation to advocate for individuals that are in the industry? Or... I advocate for the rights of sex workers and for the protection of sex workers, and I advocate for changing the age of... the age of consent for doing porn specifically. I'm not talking about the age of consent in general, but at the very least for the adult industry to 21. But I also know that actual sex workers

and women who are still in the traditional porn industry do not like it when I speak on the industry at all. Because they think that my opinion is completely irrelevant. And it doesn't, yeah. It's interesting. Yeah, I guess because you were only there for a short time, so they feel like you have no... Yeah, and there's this weird, like, there's this weird thing of they see me as biting the hand that fed me

because they take so much pride in what they do, and they're so proud of it, and I kind of demonize the industry because that's what it is. like the traditional production porn industry is predatory and toxic and terrible, absolutely terrible, top to bottom. So, yeah, they don't like it when I talk about it that way, but that's the truth. Right. Yeah, I guess that's a difficult position to be placed in. Because you obviously want to, certainly. Want to what?

To be like an advocate, right? No, not necessarily. Well, you do it like when it comes to, you know, what's the Middle East? least you do when it comes with women's rights. Yeah, yeah. But I will never advocate for the traditional porn industry. I think it should be dismantled and disbanded completely. And I think that everybody should be, I don't think it should be legal to sign a contract in perpetuity when it involves a woman's body.

Yeah. Yeah. I guess who's going to do it if we take it away from the Israelis? Uh huh. Cut that, seriously. Go ahead. That's the lead. Should I get a rhinoplasty?

No. What was the recovery process like for? Oh my god, a day, not even. I didn't take any pain meds after. Maybe just a little bit smaller? A day? A day, not even. And it looks like a little bit, just a little bit smaller, maybe?

Don't get a rhinoplasty. What about like, just tiny? Strong noses on men are so nice. What about like a, like a little bit of like a Michael Jackson style? Oh my god. A tiny. I wonder if it comes with the hype. What if I got a Snape?

Snape? Or no, I mean, Voldemort. Voldemort. Yeah. Yeah. Just a slit, just two slits. Come on. You think girls like that? Yeah.

What? Ray finds it sexy. No, I like my nose. I've recently started liking it. Were you baptized? You got a botan. What's the Batmissva confirmation? I had a First Communion.

I had a confirmation. Yeah, everything. Everything. In Lebanon, do they do Arabic mass? Yeah. Yeah. Lebanon is predominantly Christian, actually. Predominably Christian.

Yeah. 51%. Like, barely predominantly. It sounds like a little. This sounds like a little bit of exaggeration. Fifty-one. Yeah, maybe they're fluffing those numbers, but, yeah, there's a huge, huge Christian community. Yeah, I guess, like, just moving forward, like, what are your, like, big projects that you're looking forward to and, like, that you want to work on and, like, goals you have, like, in your career?

A documentary. A book? Documentary about what would the focus be? Harper-Lee. Harper-Lee? Kind of a little bit true, no? I'm telling you, I'm running with this in my head. Maybe Bo Jackson?

Bo Jackson? But he played professionally. Exactly. It doesn't count. It doesn't count. I was thinking John Cazel, that guy, but he wasn't like the Mia Khalifa of those movies. He was in five movies that all got nominated in Best Picture, and he died. Died doesn't count. He died doesn't count, no.

You know, he was Merrill Streep's partner. You know that, Fredo from The Godfather. Oh, shit. He was Merrill Streep. partner dog day afternoon godfather won two dear hunter and the conversation hunter all nominated best picture oh my god he wasn't the Mia Khalifa those movies that's quite a run there's only one other one but the legacy hasn't lasted Bjorn Borg the the Swedish tennis player oh my god

retired at 20 no he has the underwear line who Bjorn Borg look that up let's see you so both of you guys retired and started underwear yeah exactly Bjorn Borg did? Right? I don't know. Look at the Swedish underwear brand. Because my ex-husband was Swedish and he always wore like things on the waistband that said Bjorn. What was it like being married to a Swede?

Um, lots of... Do they do they... Do they laugh? Really? They don't do that. That's offensive. That's incredibly offensive to say. Is it?

Yeah, yeah. What, they're going to IKEA and eating horse meat and stuff? He retired it. Where is it? You're making this up. Very handsome guy. Look up Bjorn Swedish underpants then, because I'm just misremembering who owns the brand. Bjorn is a common name. Personal life.

Oh, his business ventures failed. Oh, my God. Poor guy. And now he's trying to go back to tennis at the age of 68. Sad when you hear about that. For what? No, I'm just kidding. I was just joking.

So, so, uh, you've been married twice, um, like, uh, is it, have you found that, uh, that's, like, uh, been, like, a difficult thing for you, like, to, like, trust people, like, reestablish trust, like, after, like, processing your, your experience was prior? No, I think I have really good discernment. Yeah. And if I don't trust someone from, like, instantly, I'm never going to. Yeah. That's not something that you can build. Yeah. It's something that you either, like, you know.

Yeah. So, no, yeah. Those relationships ended for very different reasons. Mostly just growing, growing, and not growing at the same time. Yeah. Babies. Yeah. Baby boys?

Yeah. They were baby boys. Yeah. Every boy is a baby boy until 57. I can't trust these. Men, right? Yeah. Do you think that men are becoming, like, the girls?

Yeah, they are. Because all my friends are like, all my friends are like, like I just want to like open up and share my feelings but I feel like she's withholding and I'm like isn't this what the girl the got isn't it we're supposed to be doing that you're supposed to be fighting in wars and building houses we're supposed to come back from the from the black lung place and be like the coals the coal mine she's going to be like I want to talk about my day and we're supposed to be like I can't I'm I can't do that but now it's the girls are doing that to us what happened to us is it because

The coal mines shut down. We need to go back to fossil fuels. We stopped violence. I think we stopped violence. We need to start beating the men. No, the, no. Ladies, we gotta start beating the men. I think our grandfathers were like, about to be like, when I was eight, I had a traumatic thing, but then they did violence instead.

Yeah, and that's how you exert all of that, yeah. We stopped the violence and now we're like, just, now we're like, just I want her to understand the real. Okay, so after this, I'll punch you in the face. No, it's the opposite. You need to punch me in the face? You can punch me in the face right now. right now to end the episode I'm not gonna punch you in the face I would I don't want to hit anyone let alone a girl we have to rebalance the scale and

a cultural icon vehicle leaf and the noted anti-semit that I my god I don't want to be hit we could do it through blocking it's a little bit like you don't know how to fling yourself and pretend like you got hit people do this when they make it's too much like it's it's nice vanilla no what just just regular like I love you and stuff, that kind of stuff. Without a slap, does it really mean anything? No, I don't want to be hitting and stuff and doing hitting, and she's like, hit me.

And I'm like, I will if you want. But like, it doesn't feel nice to do. Why? Because I like, just like ball gown, tuxedo. Yes. Through the sheets. Through the bed sheets. Dance, like a romantic dance and then spin.

And then, yeah, and then like a huge, you know, with a canopy bed, and then just like, you know, Exploring and then I love you what's soaking? Soaking is what the Mormons do oh yeah. I heard about that What does they do they just they just go to bed and inside of a girl? And then there's somebody under the bed and they're pushing the mattress up so technically they're not having sex They accidentally are going hurt Do you think culturally we should just people should not stop being Mormon? No people should just like we should know like kill them should have secrets again I don't need to know everything when someone talks you

know like I don't like the way you fuck is like a big part of identity now and it's just sometimes I'm like I don't care like it's like I want to get my sandwich and get out of here is that what you call cookie a sandwich no I'm at like if I'm at a bagel place and they're like I'm a dom daddy top and like a little bit like can we just go back to secrets how come Can we make things nice again, Sarah? Hmm. We can make things nice.

We got on the right track yesterday. No, I mean, this is kind of a nice thing. This is nice, yeah. No, like a kind of a, to see, you know, to see us getting along. Yeah, we're bridging the world. Christian and Jewish? Yeah. Yeah.

That's nice. Palestinian chicken. Do you think people are seeing this as an inspiration right now? Yeah, of course. Really? This is the two-state solution. No, come on. I don't want two states. I don't either. There's only one.

I don't want a state at all. Just open all the borders. We're citizens of the world. Yeah, I guess, like, I guess let's just, I guess let's leave it at this. Okay. No, I mean, I think that, like, let me see. I had one more that I wanted to say. Um, you think that, um, are you the Harper Lee of porn? Are you the social, short career, big impact, Harper Lee?

Really, all these notes are about Harper Lee? I do, I think, um, sorry, I'm sorry, I, normally I'm way more professional than this. Um, I guess like, uh, I brought up when Harry met sally. So you got your name from Wiz Galifa? No, it was my first dog's name. from Wiz Khalifa? Yeah, more or less. Yeah. Is he your favorite rapper? No, but I love weed. All right, Mia. Thank you. Thank you.