The Adam Friedland Show (Cumtown) - The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Derek Drescher - Episode 74

Episode Date: October 5, 2024

The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Derek Drescher - Episode 74 Donate to the NC Community Foundation Disaster Relief Fund here: https://nccf.fcsuite.com/erp/donate/create/fund?funit_id=16903 Deerk Drescher: https://www.instagram.com/derekdrescher/?hl=en Merch Now Live: https://theadamfriedland.show/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theadamfriedlandshow/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@adamfriedlandshowclips Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/TAFS Subscribe to  @TheAdamFriedlandShow for more here: https://bit.ly/sub-tafs Sign up to Patreon for Premium Podcast Episodes and to Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/TAFS -- LIVE SHOWS: ADAM FRIEDLAND: https://www.adamfriedland.com/tour NICK MULLEN: https://www.mull.dog/live-shows #theadamfriedlandshow #tafs #nickmullen #adamfriedland #derekdrescher

Hello and welcome to the Outland Freedland Show special guest today, Derek Drescher. You want to say hello to the people? How you doing guys? So what's your body count? Sex wise? That's how we start off every episode. I've been watching a lot of these street TikTok things where kids talk. We'll do it up front that way. I'm sorry, real quick. Go ahead. I've been watching a lot of these street TikTok things where kids talk.

We'll do it up front that way. Sorry, real quick. Go ahead. So I didn't even realize, but I have shows in North Carolina next week. October 11th and 12th I will be in Charlotte. I had to scramble, but there will be now benefit shows. So all the money will go to the name of the organization is the Disaster Relief Fund with the North Carolina Community Foundation,

which had a 100% rating on Charity Navigator, which is a website I've never heard of. But. Is that for the hurricane? It's, yeah, so it's the Disaster Relief Fund for the North Carolina Community Foundation will put a link in the description if you want to start donating now and they sent me a QR code that hopefully we can overlay the video

and then if you're in North Carolina and you're not dead come to the comedy zone and yeah we're I mean the ticket sales will go to the charity then hopefully we can raise some more money there as well but yeah please come out I mean the ticket sales will go to the charity then hopefully we can raise some more money there as well But yeah, please come out. I mean it seems it seems pretty fucking bad there, so Yeah, that that's it guys comedy for a good cause guys also I will be at the funny bone in Syracuse November 8th and 9th next month so I Hear great things go orange men Jim Jim Beheim who's that isn't that their coach I don't I don't watch it Pete college sports student Bay hot oh I watched what I try to watch as young as

possible I'm starting at a you know under tens. No apparently what I heard actually what my agents were telling me because of the NIL deals do you know about you can get sponsorships now in college. Yeah they're getting paid. They get paid? Yeah. So like the whole system of like sports agencies has been like thrown into chaos because previously you could be a sports agent go to like LSU party with guys You know like go to sororities. So they sign with you when they get out. So now they're like now they're in like, Iowa paying off corrupt 11 year old uncles like you know uncles of 11 year olds not 11 year olds who are yeah. Yeah. Yeah, so now it's the least fun get like

Five-year-olds who are uncles. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so now it's the least fun, like, whatever profession in the world. It used to be like, oh. Uncle Bob's gonna take you to Chuck E. Cheese if you sign. Exactly. You used to like go to Bama and then like, you know, do shots and stuff. Damn, they're going after kids that early now, huh? They have to because now they're getting like, you know, endorsement deals and stuff, so

now they're in play like super young. So can they have it now? It's like just a pedophile profession. Yeah Like now it's just like you have to hunt children I mean they've been doing that I love your son's body for years, right? They sign them when they're like 12 13 years old and they put them in them in those camps Do you know about this concentration those camps. Do you know about this concentration?

Wait, like for baseball caps? Yeah, they do it in Venezuela and the Dominican Republic. Yeah, but all those all those nine year olds in the Dominican Republic are also probably 43 years old. Yeah. You have children already. Danny Almonte style. Yeah. You remember that kid, Nick? No. He was in the Little League World Series and he was just like, oh, right. Yeah. He was like a beard. he was just like, oh right. Yeah Here he was like throwing gas. Yeah, that was so funny. Yeah

He was just dunking on children He was like six four. Yeah, he's played for the wrong. It was an adult. I mean, he wasn't even he was just big I mean he looked old. Yeah. Yeah, he would just like throw 95 I think he was like 16 or 17 years old. Yeah, they just lied about his age. Yeah Yeah, that's always been an issue with foreign-born players when by any means necessary That was I remember that during the Olympic the Winter Olympics and like was it 2018? Maybe it was your I Tanya came out good movie and I was in an Airbnb out in the war year of movie pass as well 2018. Yeah Yeah, big year. It's big year But yeah, I Tonya came out but then I was in an Airbnb and they had you know as a TV on it

I was out in the woods and So, you know I turn on the TV It's figure skating at the Winter Olympics and the guy I happen to see is the male figure skater from China, and they're talking about him, and they like, they're like, yeah, he's either 37 or 38 years old. It's like the guy doesn't even have a fucking birthday. He was just enlisted by the state to figure skate. And it was like right before I saw Itaniaanya and the premise of I Tanya is like oh You know it's this working-class girl and like this sport for rich girls

But then it's like yeah, but then you compare it to the Olympics, and it's like you're in the top two percent Yeah, you know I mean yeah, Tanya Harding's life was better than this Chinese guy doesn't even have a fucking birthday Like he doesn't know Skates right but that is actually does that is pretty alpha though. I think like Actually a man shouldn't even know what his birthday is Like having a birthday party as an adult man. Yeah, but you do you do it and it feels you're like Yeah, yeah, it doesn't feel like I Haven't enjoyed a birthday since I was 25. Yeah, you don't I have not in my adulthood really ever You plan birthday stuff for me for you. I do you'll twist my arm into doing it

And then it's like you know we'll go to like Dave and Buster's literally even Buster's Literally Dave and Buster's is where let's just let that marinate after that after that statement. Yeah It's nice if your friend is with his friends on his birthday. It's not nice. I'm saying Saying you're I'm saying I twist his arm you can be nice and also does he trick you or do you know that? Can you imagine just like just just just the the manners of that? the manners of that oh Hitting up our friends. Oh Nick should Nick should we should all hang out with Nick free because it's his birthday coming up, right? And then him being like yeah, but we're 45 years old

So what it's a nice thing to do for a friend. Are you that old? You're 45? No, I'm 35. He's about 47 though. Me? I don't know. I'm not sure. You don't know what your birthday is?

Well, yeah. Growing up in- That Chinese guy's probably never worn shoes that don't have blades on the bottom. Oh, 100%. That guy, he's from birth. They'd strap the fucking skates on him and he's never taken them off.

Yeah, he grew up in that training. Yeah You ever watch that 30 for 30 about the miracle on ice Russian team? Oh, dude. I love that Yeah, that's one of the greatest sports moments ever What where the hell right plastic like plastic, but have you seen the 30 for 30 about the Russian players? No, and well, it like, were they executed? They were like abused dude. I mean basically, yeah they were pissing blood and shit and it's like, you know the Soviet Union it's like it was like a military designation.

It's like you have to play. Yeah those guys were all generals. Oh yeah and they have to, you have to like, you have to have like ice skate carrying boulders completely naked and then they go to America and fucking lose. It's a bunch of college kids. And they're humiliated. Yeah. They have no home. They were like spit on when they got they lose two guys that like spike the punch at a frat party They lose to the guy two guys with gray zone sexual assault. Have you ever watched the documentary on on HBO?

About the game America on ice. What the fuck is is that actor's name? I forget his name. There's an actor narrating it. And there's this one part I love when he goes, the captain of the USA Olympic team, Mike Garuzione, steps onto the ice, whose name means eruption in Italian. Causes just that. And then he scores a goal. Is this?

Italian mm-hmm just that and then he scores a goal is this Against those poor Russians Those dudes were like 35 years old they're like pros the Russians Yeah, I've been playing with each other since they were like 15. Yeah, they're there while they're conscripted Yeah, but that's basically what it's like basically what's happening in Gaza. Yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah Yeah, if you're a cool Miracle I'm saying wow, they're getting Hamas and it's like yeah, but these guys are they're plucky upstart Yeah, right. They got nothing these guys are scripted into this these guys are playing. Yeah guys are playing yeah

Happy Russia Shana by the way, yeah, so a new year Today I'm like fuck I gotta move my car, and I'm like no I don't know you don't know you don't have to move your car I'm sure no you don't so Israel isn't that bad. No be here's why it is. This is why I Look if you destroy Israel What you think Jewish people just go away? No, they're all gonna move here and then we're getting all the holidays Uh-huh, then we're getting a ball every single I got to move my car once every two months Is there more Jews in America than in Israel? There might be there for there was a time when there was more in New York than the whole country. Yeah I think are

14 million altogether 2% of American pop population Israel is like nine point five million, so if there's four hundred million Americans, that's what? Eight million here. It's probably the same amount. I don't think that number two% seems like it hasn't been updated in like a hundred years it's true because I feel like the population is like black people also they say again because there's like a right-wing thing we're like it's weird 13% of the population commits 50% of the crime or something but it's like the 13% it's been 13% my entire life it's like do they does it stay the same? I can't imagine that it would, right?

It's gotta be a different number. What if that was the whole thing that explains it? If they did the census and they're like, oh, sorry, black people are 60% of the country. And then all those guys are like, oh, I guess I'm not racist. I was just doing the math wrong the whole time. I have a lot to think about yeah, I

Guess I better check out if some of that shit's great like after the Boston Marathon bombing You know there's only like 200 Chechen people in the United States really there's like none of there's none of them And they all do MMM. That's what I was saying last time they should have put that Joker guy in the zoo Rather than actual zoo. Yeah, put him in a fucking zoo if there's 200 Chechens And what there's got to be a cutoff where it's like all right I was reading about a guy they kept in the Bronx Zoo back in the day, too Yeah, it's the saddest story in the world. This is a Puerto Rican guy. No wearing birdman lugs

Yeah, it's the saddest story in the world. This is a Puerto Rican guy. No wearing birdman lugs They put him in and with the parrots no, I was uh, what the hell was his name? He still managed to have two families. He's a pig. Yeah. Yeah family with Barnum PT Barnum kept like a guy from Georgia in his it was like the Hall of Oddity What is that? Yeah, the what is it? Yeah, and then there's contemporary like newspaper accounts from like, you know Reporters right and they're like, yeah, this is clearly a mentally disabled black man This is not nobody thought it was like a monkey or anything. They just thought it they were like, oh you've imprisoned a man Yeah, yeah They just thought it they were like oh you've imprisoned a man. Yeah They had that guy in the cuz in your mind exhibit in your mind

You're like oh people were so stupid back then they probably thought that was actually like a different No, they knew exactly what it was they knew what they were doing. They gave that dude in the Bronx Who they gave him a bow and arrow in case like the gorillas or the apes did he commit suicide blue is? Either shot himself in the heart or blues brain with the fucking bow and arrow no Where'd he get a gun he got out they let him out But this guy had to like buy him or pay somebody off to get him out and then and then he was in the boogie down Bronx there people are doing graffiti breakdancing

Yeah, seeing Was that the dawn of hip-hop was at the time? Bronx there people are doing graffiti breakdancing Yeah seeing Was that the dawn of hip-hop was that the gun violence? Yeah gun violence I think he killed himself in like the 30s that is it that might be one of the saddest stories horrible that Wikipedia Nick mentioned this seven years ago on come town. So oh he did no no, but there but the orangutan in the whorehouse in Mexico was in Mexico It was in like Cambodia there was a yeah, there's a there's a monkey you can have sex with they shaved an orangutan a Female monkey. Yeah, no, that was a guy

It was gay also. And it would be okay with just let people do that. I don't know if it was okay. Well Jim Norton used to have that bit about like this story about somebody got arrested for raping a pitbull. And Norton's like let me just make it clear. You can't rape a pitbull. He's like if you're having sex with that pitbull it's because it wants you to have sex with it. I remember this episode of cops they caught this guy fucking a dog like in Tennessee. A Haitian migrant. That's the other thing. Now it's gotten to the level, I don't really understand.

They're like complaining about them fucking eating dogs or whatever. Is that, of all the, it's like, is that bad? Because they're not like, it's, if they're coming here and they're just integrating with the ecosystem and they're eating like bugs and stray dogs, it's like, that's good. They're like spiders. But did he confuse Haitians with Asians? I don't know.

That's what I was, that's what I was. The Haitians are the angry. That would be a funny extra yeah if it was good it was Vietnamese guys it would be crazy if the media was lying and you went to Springfield Ohio or wherever it is and there's like literally a giant web and there's a Haitian guy who is he's got eight legs and he's he's got a bunch of dogs wrapped up in webbing and you're like oh my god they never tell the truth they fucking always lie he's best friends with the pig yeah right he's telling fables yeah he's telling

faces and not see the spider is right he's writing he's writing messages and they last they eat dogs. I'll be a lot about sharing Yeah, it's a beautiful story I Was trying to think of a Haitian name and then put web after it Why club John why club John of course they have a lot of names that are like French right like well, yeah, we're French but then also like a British sea captain names from like a hundred years ago. Yeah. Like Matthew Perry.

There was a guy Matthew Perry, wasn't there? There was. Yeah, Commodore Matthew Perry. The original. His book's out now. I see it in the airport. That's a weird... It's all over the airports, the Matthew Perry Matthew Perry book and it's like who's grabbing that for a flight the act well I gotta go to Cleveland, so I want to read about this guy. I was addicted to Vicodin Matt Perry the actor yeah No, the Commodore yeah, so there was a Commodore there was a common. He was just as sarcastic as Chandler apparently

Just sarcastic Commodores. Did he actually, he overdosed from Vicodin? No. I think he destroyed his body. Can I mean? He was a, he had a Vicodin problem for like most of his adult life. Right. But then he's like, you know if you take, I mean you know, if you take opiates you can't

shit. You get backed up. He just ignored that and like ruptured his colon. Oh he was backed up up shit into his acted Yeah shit into his own body and then was in like in a coma for six months a couple years back Yeah, when I did drugs, I was like a big uh, I always thought I had impacted feces and I would just like I Surgery in January and they didn't give me I didn't I didn't think about it I was just on Vicodin for four days and yeah, I had to like fucking pull feces out of your ass

And then it's like and now I got to get the surgery done again And I'm trying to I'm like make sure I get the prune juice this time. Yeah, they don't give you Like opioids anymore for anything no actually if you go to a good day if you pay out of pocket you get whatever the fuck You want those guys still exist where you give them 300 bucks, and they'll write you the last thing they do it for is Sex change operation you could still get the Vicodin. I just I straightened my groin a couple weeks ago That's like a that's like a Trump Trump would say that that's an insane people are I just made that up Getting their sex change. They're getting up. This is all that's crazy these opioid addicts yeah, that's a while You know they just gave me they need the doctor. Do you want to give me a cuz? Like my abs are like the groin and the abs are connected so like my abs will like spasm

Like you know I need a muscle you were on junk. I was on junk That's aren't you you you're like a personal trainer. I am So what like you're not doing like yo, dude. I haven't worked out. I don't know how long wait You're telling us not a good to work out, but you know yeah, yeah, you're a hypocrite I mean it sounds like you're a hypocrite. I basically say I'm like you don't look at me how I look look at yourself Yeah, and then just if you want to look how I- Has anyone ever been in the gym? Hey, go fuck yourself, pal.

Oh, for sure, and I kick them right out. Where do you, where do you personally train? I work in- Do you have a copy of Supple Leopard? No, what's that? Oh, I feel like it's in every one of those kinds of gyms. Yeah, it's like one of the main, like, Supple Leopard. It's like a PT book, but basically any kind of pain you have,

it tells you where it could be like referred from And what we have exercise your toe hurts. It's really your hip. Yeah, it's great So then encyclopedia basically of like prehab and rehab exercises. Where do you train out of I? Work at a gym called calm body which is a gym that only hires trainers who have been incarcerated And you were you served a hard time? Yeah. You were in the Nazis? No.

When I was in, I'm a Puerto Rican Jew. I can't get into Nazis. So where do you go? Well, that's only in the Feds. There's really no Nazis left at the state level. I thought the Whites go Nazi, Black goes Muslim, and then Latins go Bachata. No, all the white guys wanna be black now.

All the white, yeah. They're like, yo, what's up, man? So they let them in Nation of Islam? I have seen white guys in the NOI, yes, I have. So what crew were you, what was your crew? I hung out with the Puerto Ricans. And what was like, what was your style? It was just my style. Yeah, what was the style? What was the like?

You know, I will say that what was the bad to come more dewy since I've got older for sure My nose keeps growing my ears and all that, you know, that's true. Yeah, the nose and the earlobes never stop It's the sad when I found that out. I I wanted to cry. Yeah, it's just they just keep horrible I mean, yeah, I just I hung with Puerto Ricans. I hung I hung with everybody It's not really like that in like the minimum security Spots in New York. It's not like you know, the West Coast is all milk You know whites with whites blacks with blacks if black people are eating here a white person can't sit there What's minimum security like well, they don't even exist anymore

They they cut them out now. Everything's medium and maximum Well, it's so what what are like the levels were like minimum. Yeah, what does minimum do like? Just do it by weight class. It's fucking insane that that's not true. I should go to women's no really It should be if you're under a hundred and forty or thirty two pounds You should be a man in a bantam prison You know what I mean, and then in between then I'm with you guys beating my ass. Yeah, that's fine But at least you're not gonna like you're gonna feel Mexican. You're gonna feel like you got a shot. You know what I mean? Like if you feel like cuz but people live off of his hope and if some fucking like six So you still got a weight cut while you're some six foot six dude is like, all right, we're gonna fight you're like

Oh, we're gonna fight you're gonna I'm gonna lose You know, I'll see you I could get mad Convinced myself I could beat up like a hundred and forty five. That is lose But I'm like fuck this piece of shit because Matt you're like still having to cut weight So you don't go up away? Yeah, and we're in yeah How do I got to stay in middle wakes if I get I can't hang with the light heavy? Mm-hmm. That's okay. So that's great. I've always said this right and it's kind of it but it's actually not even a bit It's how I feel right if if someone if I'm getting raped constantly, okay, okay. I'm just saying let's say I

Come on, I'm just saying. Let's say I am. Well, I mean, but what if it was him? Come on. I mean... Look at me. You're like, you're like, me and my cool Puerto Rican friends personally didn't see anyone getting raped. No, no, why? People making love. That's what we love. Let's say, okay, let's look at, okay, I'm the belle of the ball, okay?

And it's happening to me every night, and I'm like, this is unpleasant. I'm not, I don't enjoy this. Right. Why wouldn't I don't enjoy this right Why wouldn't I just go to the authority? How do you get the board? And how do you here's my this is a better? Rape stuff and nobody gives a shit. Why wouldn't I tattle here's a better prison question? How do you get to be one of the guys that has like GameCube in his cell? You know what I mean you have to be rich

Yeah, no and they everybody has iPads now and everyone's got phones Yeah, but what if you went like GameCube or Sega Genesis? You gotta feel like Avon Barksdale. Okay. Yeah. Yeah and Sneaker a wall of sneakers. Yeah, wait wait Because it seems like it's just that guy that murdered a bunch of children in Norway and he's like the only one that gets PlayStation Jared from subway definitely has PS5 Dude, those prisons in Norway are sick. They're awesome. They have like fucking granite countertops. Yeah It's insane they don't have linoleum floors

Guys like you're like walking through a cell which is a condo and he goes they treat us like animals here I was like what in Norway he said that how dare he and they go On weekend passes. Yeah, I'm like keep working things out with their family. Well, okay, of course You have to stick with the Puerto Ricans. There's a Jewish crew that you could stick with right be surprised Really? I mean not many Jews go to prison But there's a federal that is all that's like the Jewish prison and that's where Michael Cohen went and they have kosher food. Yes, so green Correctional that's where the kosher kitchen was and there was like a hundred Jews working in that kosher kitchen

You were in federal or state state and they would send do they do the thing where they sanitize the kitchen with a flamethrower You ever see that? The rabbi that's like that's in kosher. No,'s like a- no, it's like a Hasidic thing. That's true. Or orthodox thing. But they'll go- there was a big issue in New Jersey, because his nursing home burned down, like nine people died, because the rabbi went into the kitchen with a flamethrower,

and they had already told him, you can't do that anymore. And, I mean, there's videos of it, it's the craziest thing. Of him with a flamethrower? It's a fucking rabbi, just- they use a flamethrower. It's a fucking rabbi Just they use a flamethrower and fucking just start flame throw my friend my friend went to orthodoxy of Shiva Cuz he got all F's in high school and we all went to college and so he was like, yeah I'm gonna be just an ultra orthodox rabbi. I was like bro. What do you do? Yeah, that's crazy And then so he called me one week. He's like Adam. How are you? And I was like, why are you talking this way?

He changed his accent everything and then I get a call like three months later. He's like, yo, what's up, dude? I was like what happened? He's like dude. I got I was getting too high I miss morning prayers like every day and I was so blazed that I put something in the microwave That was supposed to be three minutes and I put it in for 300 minutes blow it up. I I set the rabbi school on fire. Remember that story from like... So he got kicked out. Remember that story from like eight months ago where Modest Yahoo was like yeah my show was canceled because of anti-semitism and then you're like oh where was the show and it was at like the clown family

fun center and like Phoenix. Some like strip mall venue is like oh I'm on hard time I know wait wait let's go back to the right question well not the rape but like with the tattle tailing like what if You were getting raped like that constantly and I don't like you should definitely tell somebody not nice And then they would put you in protective custody and PC. Okay, so I'm a punk city So that's where all the homos go pitos, but then I have to then the I have to hang out with pedophiles. Yep They have pick your poison. I can't get my chumps and then so I'm in the pedophile place Yeah, and I'm like these I don't these guys are also bullying me somehow. I'm also getting bullied there No in protective custody you wouldn't you wouldn't interact with anybody

You almost mean like this shoe like you'd go to yard by yourself. You'd shower by yourself So they give you live a horrible horrible life way worse there then right? Yeah, cuz dude. I don't know So would you rather? You know give your chance to yourself the chance to fight back from the rape fight. Look at this What it's a why is why is protective custody worse because it's like you didn't get a chance to fight back for the rapes or the actual Like it's just sucks over there like that. That's it. It's boring design. That's a trade-off. They're like, okay I'll be saying this like makes my spine tingle. I just couldn't imagine myself getting raped every day like ASMR

Sorry if some I Don't understand why everybody isn't like oh yeah put me in protective custody right away Yeah, cuz this you like shower twice a week, and you get like you only get to shower twice a week And you get like our twice a week anyway You'll sell or it could be this so you they'll give you 30 minutes a day outside of your cell And that's to use the phone work out and clean your so that you're locked in your room So you when you use the phone there's a fucking phone with a big spoon So they probably they punish you for being being a protective cousin. Okay. Yeah, it's so means you're a headache

I'm a wait, okay, but they give you the yard on your own Yeah, you get a ball yard might get a ball acted to the back of you know, you get no ball They don't give you a ball. No, because if I get the yard myself I'm gonna do my Art My yard might be connected to what so there might be a door at the back of your cell that just pops open into a cage outside. Oh, okay. Yeah.

MMA? What cage? Smaller. What goes on in the cage? Nothing. This is you walking around in a 10 by 10. Oh, they just give you a small cage? Yeah.

Okay. Let's say if they were like, you get the yard to yourself because you're such a loser bitch, right? And you can't be with all these cool guys Can you can a regular guy like I would get my I go to prison for some kind of financial crime right? Can I have a Kindle and can I have GameCube where you for financial crimes? Yes? We're you're better early little games or cakewalk then I'll game cute. I'm cooking. I'm not afraid any I don't even want to cook steaks. Yeah, I'll eat whatever they have in the commissary is fine Yeah, you know big food. I mean, that's literally what I eat every night anyways

And then I kind of walk back the whole only every three days shy honestly cannot remember last time I took a shower Yeah I don't like seeing you. Can I get an electric toothbrush? That's big for me because I got I got gum disease. I You could probably get he just started at see that 34. I got some pretty deep dental pockets I'm just saying if they give me the yard to myself right and a basketball you're not gonna basketball I'm getting I'm getting I'm getting my three up to like maybe 45 percent. You know, maybe I'm maybe I'm league Maybe I'm coming out of there You can play for the for the globe charters. No in the National Basketball Association a white guy that can shoot

Every team needs that That's what I'm saying it. I you might get a ball It depends on facility. Mm-hmm. Do they have Wi-Fi in there? I don't know. Yeah, that's a good question. Well, if so... We live in... It's what you think, because it's like... That's the world we live in.

So even being isolated, like in terms of a cell, now you have to think about digital isolation, which is a whole other aspect that's been introduced into people's psychesches so if you throw somebody in jail and they can't like be like what's Kamala HQ tweeting right right so they don't have access to Jen Psaki's latest updates on that that on these crazy things that Jay that's that's what I like to call hard time I might even have to kill one of the guards yeah take their gun and shoot up the entire prison unless I know

you know what does Abby Philip have to say about yeah. Yeah, and so I need access to those things I want to know yeah exactly what the vice presidential debate would be very funny to be in prison for raping and murdering like let's say 30 children and then you're sitting there and you're like, can you believe this Donald Trump? Can you believe this guy he cannot be president? I mean democracy is on the line this year. You just fucking, yeah you ran a school bus off the road and went in through the emergency exit in the back and just bam bam bam just hitting seat after seat and then you come out completely nude with your hands up just waiting for the police to take you So they sorry

iPods are our iPads are a thing now, but I hate the iPad nobody want that makes sense that that's what's in prison The next thing you're gonna have is Apple vision Pro what we need is iPhones and maybe a MacBook Uh-huh why pad is for an infant? It's like an it's very key. Shut up at the table. Yeah Yeah, yeah, well you go order your food through there. You can email a family I'm sure guys have figured out how to crack them and do all kinds of wait But I would wait wait wait you're saying they fired all the waiters and now you order on the iPad. Yeah, okay Jesus Christ you they used to have waiters in prison. Yeah One of my favorite things is when you're on a plane and you see like a Ursula style woman like a 50 year old

They're just like a big octopus. Well, I'm spending but spending like fucking three four hundred hours a week on hair and makeup With bangles and like, you know where they have claws Yeah, you know one of those types of ladies just a big bitch Yeah, like a big rich though Yeah, maybe she has a rich husband, but he owns like car dealerships, and he's red and his penis is red Yeah, you know they're like awful people. He's a he's a parrot head one of those you love They have the biggest iPad, and then they play like they play like candy. Yeah Yeah

That's my dude that's my parents yeah, I'm like this is a really my mother has this huge iPad and she's a guy our age Semi-attacks a doku is the funniest thing in the world Sudoku it takes three minutes to understand what the game is and then it's like basically like playing tic-tac-toe with yourself It's it's not it's harder than to know it's not I don't play so you gotta be really fucking dumb to be challenged by Sudoku Sometimes on a plane you Okay Was that half time you said no ad time today's episode is brought to you by mud water

Which they have plenty of in North Carolina where I will be in a week and a half at Charlotte 100% of the ticket sales are going to the North Carolina Community Foundation I defy I don't know if the name sounds like fake, but very highly rated charity, please come out Nick have you used mud water have you experienced it? Oh, yeah, and you could provide a personal endorsement perhaps Yeah, I I like to drink my coffee in the bathroom. Yeah, and and it's always kind of bothered me Because it didn't have they had the wrong consistency You know felt like was going through me too quickly, and I switched over to I mean I tried all the different types of alternative And this one let me tell you this one was the best one. Did they send us the product?

Do we have it they'd seen here somewhere? Yeah? They want us to show it Pete brought it in somewhere yeah they want us to show it Pete brought it in one moment sorry guys she's getting the intercom for Pete yeah like with the Charlie's Angels one you know a little red light yeah what was that dude's name I used to talk to them Charlie it was Charlie who was there the guy that helped them though is that a joke question Basil was his name the boss Bosley. Yeah, Bill Murray It was Charlie I thought it was Bill Murray. I liked I liked that one that came out in like 2000 with Lucy Lou and

Drew Barrymore Wow how funny is it you don't remember the white ladies names and the true Barrymore wow how funny is it you don't remember the white ladies names yeah Cameron Diaz it was in Uma Thurman no she was in the Avengers you remember that movie yeah that movie sucked oh yeah it was like they were British okay guys this is we're gonna show you this product. This is what Mudwater is. And Mudwater is mudslash, backslash WTR, which I think is a kind of cool modern branding. How about this, you wanna read what that is? Yeah.

It's very durable if you drop it. Mudwater Rise Cacao. Masala Chai, which is black tea ginger cardamom cloves nutmeg and black pepper That's a lot Lion's mane you want me to read all these no no it's fine. I don't know why I do that okay So guys this is this is something else that comes with it. It's called the whip Okay, walks and hits per inning and This is something else that comes with it. It's called the whip. Okay.

Walks and hits per inning. And it's easy to clean. It goes at 4,000 RPM. We got one of those from another sponsor. A lot of these companies are sending these things here. I would say you can just use a spoon, probably. No, I think I would use the whip. Do your hands need a break from all that spoon wielding?

No. Spoon wielding no spoon wielding that mine do mine don't yeah I do meet the the mud whip I would say this guys get the mud water maybe pass on the whip or give it takes a whip it comes in the whip the whip comes in its own package so and it comes free with this I'm assuming you can just put wrapping paper on it and give it to your aunt And then she has no idea what the mud water even is. She's like, oh my god I have a spoon arthritis your aunt's gonna use those 4,000 RPMs Yeah, if you know what I'm talking to get stuck in her hair and rips her scalp off your aunt's gonna get a Oh my god, the natives were here

You know that I told you that's all right about the scalp my grandmother No, she she got her hair. She got your grandma was scalped by She was in memory care. She said something very racist about command. She's scalping her. No, she about another Another old lady in memory care was it a black lady I don't remember if it was a black lady, but she just turned to me and she goes The natives are here What a crazy way to kill somebody What scalping yeah?

Guys here's the deal if you don't have Wait, sorry. You could die right from scalping. Just from the sun. Yeah, yeah, you bleed out. Shocking shit. Especially in like 1850 in the middle of the woods.

The woods, yeah. Guys, we're obsessed with mud water. When 3 p.m. rolls around and you notice you're yawning in a very important meeting, but you don't wanna drink an afternoon cup, what do you do? You grab mud water, it's the best okay mud water is a coffee alternative filled with chai, cacao, lion's mane, chaga, reishi, cordyceps, to turmeric and cinnamon to get your energy fix without your heart doing jazz hands every morning my heart I have a homosexual heart folks guys do

you have a gay heart mud water is is like I hate jazz hands as a reference across the board jazz hands yeah yeah when do you ever encounter them I don't know it was funny the first time ever hang out out with Bob Fosse. Somebody said jazz hands and now Mud water is like coffee's chilled yoga loving cousin Who went on a spiritual retreat and came back more zen without any of the jitters imagine being alert calm and at the same time while not having any trouble. I tell you you know who you're really used to mud water is the copywriter who Who put this together? Yeah, this guy doesn't're really used to, Mudwater is the copywriter who put this together. Yeah, this guy doesn't sound very chill.

While his brain is shutting down. I got it. Not only does Mudwater give you that morning boost you need, but it's also packed with adaptogens and antioxidants and all those other fancy health words that make you feel superior to your coffee drinking friends, superior. It does look, I don't understand why that's even.

If you want to be racist to people that drink coffee, drink this. It works. I don't know if you're like me. I drink coffee all day long. It doesn't coffee just stops working after 3 p.m. It is. So you gotta switch up.

You can either do something like this. It's like the first bump is nice and then the rest of the day sucks. Or you can switch to Red Bull which fucks you up even worse. So use this if you drink coffee all the time you hit it 3 p.m. You're good, and you fall so life of a person that's not allowed to do opiates anymore correctly Yeah, no, but for real guys. Yeah, it doesn't give you jitters like coffee. It doesn't make your stomach feel like crap like coffee

This is something that actually works and doesn't like drive you nuts so our listeners guys if you give Mudwater a shot you can save big because our listeners get up to 43% off your entire time only deal comes with shipping the first season of our list on DVD and a free rechargeable frother head to Mudwater that, that's M-U-D-W-T-R dot com and use the code. R-L-I-Dollar Son Dollars. The code is T-A-F-S. The code is T-A-F-S. Okay, so go to Mudwater, M-U-D-W-T-R dot com and use the code TAFS at checkout guys. This This is a great deal you get a free frother you can use it

I would keep it Nick would give it to his aunt the frother not the mud water I keep that for myself the mud waters for me the frother is for my I got a frother with do I got one of those? Curry first I'll never buy another curry again Yeah, they stay got one that can't they keep trying to be nicer than they are it should just say shitty coffee Yeah, yeah, yeah, here's so here's a quick way to make shitty coffee With your curry well also the tubes get and I got one that was I was called the K cafe And it had a frother and it just spins the milk for you. That's it Yeah, so you can get so it's spinny, but it's like this is not even close or where they have like an espresso setting

It's like you're I'm gonna kill somebody the K cafe the K cafe. I just do Instant coffee bustello. Yeah, that's it. You know what's actually good is the That's it. You know what's actually good is the bestello espresso grounds. Yeah in an aero press Yes, it makes surprisingly good coffee. It's strong. It's good strong coffee. Yeah, yeah Am I asking too many questions about Absolutely, you talked to like kids groups about this kind of I have before do you scare them straight? No, they were like worse than I I was you don't like they're like pull out your pocket And say hold this and now you're my girlfriend. No, bro. They'd send me I would talk to kids from like fucking East New York and

I'd be terrified like don't go to prison. They're like we don't have grocery stores Why would we not go to prison that's so crazy, you know crazy. You know everything you're saying about prison sounds better than a better You telling me I can have breakfast lunch and dinner right yeah So you so you you brag to these kids basically basically, but the kids are mean to you and dude It's not even that they're mean you're just you're it's hard to get through like I thought they're tall on a panel It was me like the first Puerto Rican guy also It doesn't work when anybody does people have to live their own lives and make for sure decisions I don't think any of those programs have ever stopped it has dare ever done anything other than like tell kids like

Okay, when you smoke weed in five years This is why I decided to buy it Remember dare told us like how to do it. Yeah they're like yeah you could like twist up a you could take the blunt cuts out you'll notice why this pipe a Dutch master yeah you get a cool shirt and some stickers that shirt is cool maybe sometimes a Nutri-Grain bar I was I sat on a panel with Eric Adams while he was running for mayor a gun violence. Oh, let's talk about that so That's first of all best and you know who else was there first mayor of our lifetime Let's just go on the record Nick Cannon was also on the panel and this was the weirdest thing that I've ever been involved in

So my brother got shot like five years ago and the woman who was running the panel was like Derek I want you to come tell your story to these these kids about your brother getting shot and I was saying I walk in and Eric Adams is there and Nick Cannon I was like what the fuck why would you talk about your brother getting shot on Wild and Out so You were were you on MTV's Wild and Out? Battle Raps, fucking Eric Adams, that's what I went for All this trying to one-up each other with our gum-laps What did he do by the way? Who?

Eric Adams He was a cop for 30 years No, no, I mean like the crime he got like free business class upgrades He got free crap from Turkey It was like it wasn't even actual money It's things that you don't even know what the value of is. We have to stand by our mayor. Well, especially with airlines because it's like you pay these prices that are, it's like,

I don't, what is this paying for? Jet fuel? I have no fucking idea. It seems, there's four companies, so it seems like likely we're all getting fucked, right? Like that's my understanding of how it is when a handful of companies control things, they can charge whatever they want and then when you do get you look at the business class prices it all seems arbitrary anyways if I got offered a free upgrade by the government of Turkey I'd be like yeah sure because it's because

fundamentally it's worthless yeah what's the point either I get it or some fat idiot gets it you know what I mean yeah bangles on didn't we have one governor that was He bought prostitutes yes, and like also another great governor and the state troopers like brought he was it them too Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, well. I think if you get like no he was never the governor. He was the Attorney General He's running for governor running for governor Elliott Spitzer Spitzer. Yeah Yeah, Elliott Hawk to and they took him down because he went after Wall Street. And then also that was the Trooper Gate thing. I feel like they're taking Adams down because he went after the Democrats.

Trooper Gate was in Jersey, I thought. Kind of, right? With the migrants. That's what I...he said. Yeah. Yeah. I like that he did the like, the black guy, like getting in trouble thing. There has to be more to it than the business class Upgrades because that's what I saw and that seems fucking absurd Well, I was listening to his lawyer the other day and it's he's like I feel he with the way

He was explained is once we get through all this red tape You're gonna see that it really wasn't that much money and it's not a big deal Yeah, that's what his cuz Bob Menendez first of all all politicians are for sale. That's we know that Yeah, that's just the way it works. That's not an insightful statement. It's just what the case is. Bob Menendez got in trouble because he was accepting things like gold bricks. It was retarded. I mean, it was just done. He was meeting with an Egyptian Wario at fucking McDonald's. He was handing him suitcases with gold in it. Bullion in it. Yeah, I, I mean it's yeah, it's

Burlap sack in South Africa the our last president was buying like like wild animals with taxpayer money Jacob Zuma was like no, it's like, you know Good was like buying hippos in good fellows when the guy shows up with the fur jacket, and good fellows, he's like, take the jacket off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a dope pot. Hey, whoa. That's all when somebody gets in trouble, it's for that.

Right. But the Eric Adams thing, if it is, again, just business class everything, because that's all I saw. It's cheap politics, like, take down. Yeah, but it's just. But I love that the. But why take him down for like the thing that's You know it's like

Is he squeaky clean otherwise? That's the thing you can get him on a cop for 30 years I never when he real president and he never did anything wrong. He had no I don't think he ever did anything wrong He's the best mate. He brought swagger back to our city did anything wrong. He's the best mate. He brought swagger back to our city. Sitting with him for two hours. He was bat shit crazy. I'm sure he is. So is Nick Cannon out of his fucking mind. When I, when Adams did the press conference after he got in trouble, he did. I love, I love that he did like the classic black guy getting in trouble thing where he does a press conference and it's all guys and kufis and daishikis standing next to him. I didn't see that. It was pretty awesome. There was a guy that looked like Dick Gregory that had a kufi on standing next to him and he was like he was like uh... he's like I have the support of my constituents. It's like when Michael Jackson had his second trial and then he just had Nation of Islam guys. You see that guy Mark Lawler's in trouble for... Who's that?

He's a congressman from New York? I think he represents like Fucking like Putnam County or something, but there's pictures of him as Michael Jackson on Halloween 2006 which they all get in trouble for Michael Jackson in particular I mean dude and he can argue which was like Michael Jackson Michael Jackson or no I did blackface Michael Jackson Michael Jackson was you? No, Michael Jackson. Yeah like dark he used like bronzer Yeah, and then he had to go on the news and be like I was a tribute to an artist that I was touched by and Inspired by and who I loved his music brought so much joy to you know

by and who I loved his music brought so much joy you know he is the best yeah of course he is wait so you're on this panel the answer should just be you're like it was 2006 yeah yes but we didn't know I would get in trouble for this 20 years yeah show me show me any public statement from if you're if you're on the news show me if you're interviewing me and you're a journalist show me a public statement from you saying we need gay marriage in 2006 If you don't have that shut up, you know Yeah, it's show me a public statement from you in 2006 saying you can't be Michael Jackson for Halloween. Exactly That just was not we become political consultants. Yeah, whatever the fuck this is, right?

We like really Eric Adams this guy These defenses are so simple. I Loved when Cuomo got in trouble in his defense for like I'm Italian was that yeah, we like to hug and kiss Because we're Italian yeah Of course, I'm I'm an oily Wop. I love to smell and hug. I'm a grease ball. I like to sexually harass. Of course, I'm a fucking gross dago. It's my culture. Do you think he's in his basement right now doing fake COVID updates like Rupert Pumpkin to nobody?

He's got a fake background, like a fake skyline of New York. The numbers are coming down and we're doing the best that we can. And we thank everybody. He's just rubbing his nipples. But there's a lot more work to do. He's in a gimp costume. Yeah, he's got his protruding nipples. They're just cut out of his shirt, his large nipple.

Ma, just put my spaghetti in the oven. I'll come up later. I'm doing my COVID broadcast! Shut up you fucking bitch! Dude, I just knew when all that was happening that I was like, he's become like a rockstar now and it's just a matter of time before they fuck him in the ass. Oh, Cuomo? Yeah, I knew.

Yeah, and then they got the brother too. Yeah. politics is very funny and there's these people that that like they become beloved for like a hot second They don't they have no idea what's down Oh, it's all cuz unless you can like translate that to power and then more power immediately It's like then the rest of these vultures are gonna figure out a way to destroy you the truth is Remember how much people liked Beto O'Rourke? Who's that? He's like Texas he's a Texas guy that ran for president.

Like a Democrat from Texas. Yeah. Oh no, I never heard of him. And he like skateboarded. And it was right after, I remember there was like some kind of focus group or something, but it was like, what's that, that like a DNC consultant, Tom,

fuck, I'm struggling to remember his name now, the Hispanic guy, Tom, doesn't matter. he there was like information that there was a focus group that says that people respond well to swear words because it it it conveys authenticity and then it was like that week it was like a bunch of like prominent Democrat media consultants like trying out cursing you know what they mean they were like this election do it it's important is fuck you know like it was very clear that was gonna be lit but yeah they don't they don't said fuck or something it that was his big moment he like it was riding on a skateboard he

kick-flipped into a place and he said these fucking school shootings have to stop and his name was like Robert, too Yeah, he yeah, he went by Beto to seem more like Latino, Texas But yeah, his name was Robert or was he like half Spanish or something? No, I don't think he was at all Yeah, he was Irish. He was like, yeah De Blasio he was his real name is like fucking Adolf Hitler. Yeah. Yeah, so he was Irish. He was like, yeah, oh de Blasio. He was he was his real name is like fucking Adolf Hitler Yeah, yeah, so he's German. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Herman Guring shit like that. Yeah That's why it's a you're on this dais at the Friars Club roast with Nick Cannon You got you got the mayor now the mayor is Brooklyn Borough president though

We're at the time. He's Brooklyn Borough president running for mayor Yeah, and then a bunch of little criminal kids a bunch of kids who who had generational gun violence trauma That's what they it's crazy they expected him to fly economy I'm in business class. I'm in business dealing with that imagine the fucking the borough president having to pass me on the way to economy and I'm in business class yeah trying to plug in my GameCube it's embarrassing yeah it was right around the time the cannon got in trouble for

all the anti-semitism yeah yeah yeah so yeah it was I don't remember that yeah it was why yeah he did it came in turban and all he he went yeah he he did anti-semitism and then who was the they got like someone hilarious to like teach him that Jews are okay I don't know if it was like Ben Shapiro it was like someone sounds right yeah yeah yeah yeah but no no but it was like one of those rabbi that oh yeah rabbi yeah, they got rabbi shmooley What's he like he's like the design is like Casey Neistat basically just goes rabbi shmooley is like the go pro video reformed You know no no no he's he's Orthodox Jews, but yeah, but he like does TV and stuff. Yeah

He's like the Neil deGrasse Tyson. He's like, you know, like he's like not actually doing rabbi stuff He's just like more on TV talking about rabbi stuff. One thing I could tell you about that panel was Nick Cannon I waited my guts. I wish why I tamed a friendship with dude I'll show you guys a picture after the Neil deGrasse Tyson. His life is awesome No, he's he's no friend of ours. Why why you guys him on, didn't you? Yeah, he was a nice guy. Adam doesn't like him now for some reason. Why don't you like him? Because he made that race essentialist argument that was weird.

What? What are you talking about? He made that weird, like- This joke is taking way too long to get to the point. It's not a joke. I'm not doing a joke. Okay. He was doing that weird thing that was supposed to be pro-trans, and then by the end of it, it seemed like he was doing that weird thing that was supposed to be pro trans and then by the end of it it seemed like he was just like and I succeeded despite my Despite my blackness like it got like it

Logically it didn't flow at all. So you're not you don't like the guy anymore. I don't respect him He just sits around making like fucking vinegar and baking soda volcanoes and he gets to live in the museum for free. I respect that. But whenever he talks about stuff that isn't science and you listen to what he's actually saying, it's the dumbest shit you've ever heard. That was the coolest part about meeting him. I was like, so how did you, I'm like, I'm like, I was aware of you since I was a child, right? And it's like, but I don't know actually, I didn't Google you at all but prior to you coming here to do our show, you know, so it's like what like how did you get? Into being like a talking head and he was just a student in Columbia and he like had a good voice

And so they brought him on like one TV thing and he was charismatic and good at it And so then his career went from there. It wasn't like he was like some genius astrophysicist or whatever like you know was smart, but he never like sure but I mean it wasn't like it wasn't like it was a guy published paper It wasn't like it was a guy in the field that was doing this groundbreaking research, and then he became he's just a good What they call a science communicator he talks that which which is like you talk which going for that going to be a science Communicator is like one of the I'm trying what's it called? It's like risk versus reward because either there's two slots ever yeah Carl Sagan goes to the greatest scientist the other one goes to the guy that's the most charismatic and then everyone else

ends up like farming for reddit karma yeah what I mean doctor he was the rest of them are like on the Star Trek subreddit being like here's a fun thing about how the hyperdrive would actually work. You know, and you're just like, your body is cheese, and you're just fucking... There is nothing... what he does... If you don't make it to that echelon, you're trash. You know what I mean?

But it's only one guy. It's much worse than like, you know, like guys that failed being professional athletes. Like if you're just working in some lab and nobody knows who you are well no because you don't end up there if you aspire to be a science communicator you you probably end up working at Radio Shack if you don't if you don't get to live in the Natural History Museum and come to the Adam Friedland show where you offend Adam with your he didn't raise essentialist arguments he didn't offend me a trans people, but I realized no

But okay what I realized was this right was that what he does in his job makes people feel great Right when they listen when they see him on TV and listen to the things he says Like in a very like like a more when someone shares a meme It makes you feel like a kid has nothing to do with science No, it makes to engage with the world earnestly. It makes people... Which is what people want. There is nothing... There's absolutely nothing but a positive impact he has on the world.

But... When he popped off about anything that wasn't science... He hasn't realized that he only knows science. And then when he talks about like social shit or like anything else... So you're accusing him of podcasting correct? Yeah Yeah, well no, but no no no what I'm saying is they're accusing him of doing he is no smarter than us He is no smarter than us Yeah, what I'm saying is this nothing that he's bringing to the table

We haven't brought to the table already guys are fucking weird for me man i can't keep thank you we're just as smart as the grass we're just as we're just as smart as neil degrasse size what the hell is the natural history museum you mean prison no honestly that's what they should call it that's what they should call prison honestly can i tell you something can I tell you something? Can I tell you something? Because of your time, Nick, Nick, where are you going? I'll say this to you and I mean this as a compliment because of your time on the inside,

what that gave you was street smarts. Yeah. Street smarts that I will never have. Right. And when I see you, I see a Professor emeritus of The the smarts of the blogs the streets. Yeah, wait, how long wait? How long did you have to go for? I was in and out for years. So altogether It was like it was just drunk tanker. Was it like no no. No, I had I've been arrested like over 30 times

30 times why a rambling man? Yeah. Yeah, well, it's mostly thefts and and drugs And what's the longest time you served about two years? That's so long. I went in and out I do a year come back out do we hear two years just whenever someone's like, oh they got off light They got two years. I'm like, I imagine just being there for two years as like that's just so long. Yeah Like like what was I doing fucking two years ago? You there's so many things that have happened in my life in the last two years You know what I'm saying? Yeah, no now some broad might become president So it lasts two years. Well, I was I was like on drugs bad So it lasts two years. Well, I was I was like on drugs bad

Well, Obama was president. So it was just and I got clean and Trump was president and then you got dirty again No, I stayed clean. Well, I was just like this is crazy like if it's just weird that you know, I I was First black actually where did it go? Oh, you're Hi, we had our first black actually where did nico? Oh you're high You're too I was ripped the whole time. That's so you you missed it. I missed Obama you missed it Yeah, you know what I missed I missed the Floyd protests How were you my mom died the day after Floyd and I remember the day before she died Just the biggest smile on your face

I'd see if you if you had to miss something I Didn't miss it on purpose. Okay, my mom. So the day before she died, right? Like I went on Instagram and then like LeBron like everyone sharing this video of this guy's getting his head kneeled on right and then I was like, oh, that's weird. I thought this is the app where you look at pictures of your girlfriend's friends, right public profiles on their public

profiles. Okay, public profile then. Yeah, these are great girls, okay? No, but for real. So you met, so you did, you sat Shiva. And then my mom died, and I sat Shiva, and I didn't look at my phone, I was like, I'm gonna be with my family. Sat Shiva, was it 10 days?

Yeah, yeah. And then I'm on a plane back to New York, I open up Twitter. And you're like, what the fuck? First thing I see is Nancy Pelosi doing this in the Kente glass. And I was like, what? Yes.

That's exactly how I felt. That's how I felt. So you missed, you did that because you were on opioids during Obama. Right. Yeah. I lost the love of my life. You had the love of your life.

Opiates. No, but it was like that was like Going on right now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and then everyone was like doing the black square. I missed the black square Yeah, everyone was like these are the resources for George Floyd And then they were like it turns out the resources were wrong. We got him wrong an Indian guy now is $500,000. And then COVID happened? Well, COVID was before that. That was like three months into COVID.

Yeah. Yeah. No, Floyd was actually kind of the first way that you could leave your house and still be a good person. Yeah, yep, yep, yep. Yeah, people were out there. Did you protest? Well, I kind of, it was 10 days into Floyd.

I was like, I kind of missed. I went to like- Oh, I kind of it was ten days into Floyd. I was like I kind of missed I Went oh, I would My mom died trust me my mom died. They were playing pop smoke it looked fun. I Don't know who pops smoke is that was all for zoomers. I didn't feel welcome pop. So it was great to be Used to be the next 50, and then he died. Because he was all of these children acting like adults. On his Instagram story, there was like a corner of a piece of mail in his house.

And then they saw it. And they went and killed him. They meant to go rob him at gunpoint and then accidentally killed him. And he was the next 50. He sounded exactly like a 50. I feel like they killed him on purpose. Who did? The Jews? purpose Who did the Jews?

Puerto Rican-jews, I need because it happened during COVID Pop good, right didn't he die was a year before I say this is how much I paid time I have no my timelines are five. I did I did know a guy whose New Year's resolution was to stop saying the n-word white guy Who was like really into when I got? Third and you're like that's gonna be my New Year's resolution. Yeah, but until then What kind of white guy was he he's not not in hateful way in like song Lyric kind of and also kind of like what's up my you know where's he from? New York he's from this from the city. Yeah, so he grew up saying it just but like it's he knew it was bad

Would he say it in front of black people I? Don't think so I don't think so Jewish kid Maybe I mean it's New York probably a little I know no, but it was like I shouldn't think so. Jewish kid? Maybe, I mean it's New York probably a little. I know no, but it was like I shouldn't say this It's not it's not right and then when I got back He was like so into the protest and I was like it was very funny because I was like Who does it not because I moved here and I thought like oh every racial group does it because you'd see kids You'll see Chinese Korean kids do it a lot. Yeah Well, I live in a Chinese family and the Chinese boy would say it and he was like a computer nerd

Yeah, he wasn't even like you know like a cool He'd be sitting there playing like a like a kitten version of Warcraft and he'd be on there and then he would like Sing pop songs don't be like oh quit job. You know and then drop it and it was insane. Yeah I used to say it but only in my Neighborhood the Arabs don't they don't say no they do they do well I don't 100% they say it in the Yemeni say it and yeah, the Arabs definitely do say well Maybe not maybe not the ones I know but it's very weird that they don't because people are calling them that yeah You'll see the other guy be like you know

What do you mean you don't have any more bagels? You know he's like I'm sorry they just didn't know that we don't have them. I think oh and the videos I think it's a generational. I mean I think yeah Oh, I think their kids definitely say it because like yeah The the deli on my block is is run by Yemenis and they all they love they can't get enough of it I like a lot of them to have the the Yemen car. Have you seen that? What's that the whole flag of Yemen all over the car? Oh, they're being like Puerto Regans now Yeah, yeah, they're like the new have you been to the parade the Puerto Rican Day parade?

Yeah, no, I never I never went cuz I was when I was young there was all those rapes at that one. Yeah, it was the... It was like a hundred rapes or something. It was scary, yeah. So I've always stayed away. Really? That was the Jewish side of you that kept you away? Yeah, I don't want to be involved. Really?

Not a mass rape. You know? I didn't know that happened. I thought the Caribbean one was the one that had problems. There were some rapes at that one too. Yeah, yeah. I think there was only six though. But this one that happened... Well, shootings more than anything at the Caribbean day. Yeah

Yeah, but yeah, there was a I forget what year was but there was a ton of sexual misconduct So yeah, I've straight I haven't I wouldn't really want it's in the Bronx. I think it I thought it's in in uptown Might be Harlem. Yeah Do you remember the episode of the Sopranos when age it the final season where he's dating blonde? Pete where we at did we do the? Yes, he was she was Dominican right? I think she was Puerto Rican, but he then yeah AJ has like the flags and stuff Yeah, I remember he gets dumped. He has all the Puerto Rico's Yeah, she jumped him. All right guys. We're here to talk about my bookie you guys know about my bookie they've been a friends of the

show for some time and winning season is back and it's your time to shine with my bookie their weekly risk-free boosts classic super in Survivor Contest cashing in has never been easier whether you're on a season where there you are a season pro or a first-time better there's something for everyone to win big this season just click my bookie and use my code Adam 100 Adam yes Adam 100 to sign up for free and then you'll be ready to start winning and earning are you big sports fan yeah I like sports I don't gamble though you don't gamble well you should

start actually with my code Adam 100 It's that time of the year. Winning season is back. Football is back. My bookie is here to make sure you're ready to cash in on the action. This season. My bookie is pulling out all the stops with incredible promotions like weekly risk free boosts on Thursdays where you can bet without a sweat. If your bet hits hits you win big If it doesn't forget it My bookie will refund your wager, but that's just the beginning my bookie is giving away hunt It's funny. You didn't want to go to the Puerto Rican Day parade because the rapes, but you went to

Which one? Yeah, that is true But that was actually rude of me to say. No, no. I kind of just popped it in my head. There's a gay, like everyone be like, yo, you can't do that shit in jail. But there's, like I've seen guys get married in the yard. Like they threw rice and everything.

Really? Yeah. And it's romantic. You don't have a problem with that? Hillary Clinton. Hillary Clinton. Until two months ago. Yeah, it's true.

Now she's... Oh, she hated gays now. Oh, yeah No, yeah, they're all yeah They're ready to get started use promo code Adam 100 and claim some extra cheese on top with your first deposit my book He's tiered bonuses make it easy to deposit with crypto or with credit the bigger your deposit the bigger your bonus and now loyalty pays off with my bookie plus The more you play the more you win It's simple climb through the tears of the loyalty rewards program to unlock even more epic promotions exclusive giveaways and bigger rewards my bookie plus is the lock of the century bet on

anything anywhere anytime and make your season winning a season I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that it's fine it wrong. Just a part of my experience. So you're getting back into your Judaism? No. What was it, October 7th that did it? I stopped. I stopped being into Judaism like when the pandemic happened. Have you seen people online being like,

man, October 7th is coming up. I hope there's not a terrorist attack or something. Oh, January 6th. January 6th. That's what it was. But it's like, you know, the presenting it is like, you know what might, because it's, you know, it's October 7th. And what happened, what happened last year. Yeah. You know, it's like, I don't really think that's how time or life works. Were people thinking that on the one year anniversary of 9-11? Trust me, I'm saying that confidently in the hopes that another October 7th does happen because I know I often I Made to look stupid by world events whenever I try to Prognosticate or anything on those lines, so I'm gonna confidently say nothing is going to happen right it sounds just

There's egg on my it sounds like you know so we're ready for it yeah this time around oh I didn't tell you the craziest thing that fucking happened speaking of me knowing about something what oh I don't even really know if I want to say I never talked to anybody on the plane you know when I fly but I was on the flight from Boston to DC and it's like the first time ever this guy sits down this guy you know shakes my hand and my hand and you know, I'm like, okay, I'm like shy. So you know, I start talking to me, asking me about what I do, you know, I say I'm a comic and start talking about comedy. He actually knows a comic who I knew in DC, he knows his wife and very friendly guy. We have a friendly conversation the whole time and I'm like, wow, that was nice.

Even after we leave the plane, you know, he like headed off, and we shake hands and stuff I don't want to go like give too much of his Personal information because he was a very nice guy, but he told me it's like full name right It's just by chance because he told me a little about what he did he said he was in the military at one point You looked him up. I looked him up senior interrogator at Guantanamo Bay get the fuck. I know how crazy is that right and then it like It's so dude. I really it really like you Crazy is that right and then it like it's so dude. I really it really like you What's that he he made you bring your walls down because that's his specialty. I don't think so I think he was just a friendly guy It's not like there's any information you can get out of me other than like here's what I think about how trivial pursuit has changed

Over the last 20 years. I mean that was like the substance of the conversation But you think he goes into like though in Guantanamo Bay. He's like hey I'm also not the guy you would need to like I just say everything That's my problem is I just I just be saying stuff right you know so like that's why I'm not like I don't talk much the FBI could just call me and be like hey Do you support this this has happened literally where the FBI is like come to me and said for real do you support Isis? Yeah, the FBI called you They came to my fucking apartment, and then they like questioned me And I was like no

Wait no, I don't know they knocked on your door, and they were like hey They came twice to my apartment, and they came again. Yeah, what when did this happen like ten years ago, dude So yeah, no, you would have scared at all. I was more just interested. I mean it was like I mean, it's so absurd, you know That's crazy. Yeah, was it cuz of like stuff you were putting in like vlogs and you know, no I mean literally I mean I think people listen to show another story already, but but basically I went to I Went to go see my grandma before she died and then my uncle was dropping me off at this was in Philly My uncle dropped me off at the bus to go back to New York

And we're in the car and it was one like Isis was new right and so he's asking about it And he's like you know like where these guys come from or whatever and then I kind of explained like ah you know well Iraq became this sort of vacuum and you have these different groups and it's like literally stuff I've just read in the New York Times. I mean, it's not any kind of in-depth and your uncle reported Well, he's like, how do you know all this stuff? And I'm like it's in the you I'd like to read the news. I mean not even like in depth It's the front page. You know what I mean? He thought you were like a sleeper Yeah, what then there was just one thing cuz he was like he was like

he's like I saw Nick say fuck you like he was like I don't know where you just find like fucking like a million psychopaths it'll just fucking they want to destroy freedom or whatever and I'm like well I don't think they're not psychopaths because it's like like it's not mentally ill people right you were a sympathize it's well it's not mentally ill people. So you think you were a sympathizer? Well, it's not even, I didn't even say anything sympathetic. I just said it's like, no, it's like, it's the problem with like any group of young men is like they're angry and violent and they're looking for a way to sublimate that aggression.

And if you're like an upper middle class person, you can do it by- Playing pickleball. Yeah, getting into a drunk driving accident and killing your girlfriend then your Senator or uncle covers it up for you. You know what I mean? But if you're like if you're an Arab guy in fucking Britain You know and it's like you're really into drill music or whatever and you can go cut somebody's head off It's like and you get a Toyota Hilux. Yeah, why the fuck not? I mean, it's like you know why not go do that and then there's some marginal justification for it and it's like unfortunately know why not go do that and then there's some marginal justification for it, and it's like

unfortunately, that's just like Because even now as a grown man with extremely low testosterone levels. I'm like yeah, that would be cool You know I mean you can't deny that you said that's your uncle and then all of a sudden I didn't say that to that extent I just said you can't call it's not crazy people. That's like a dumb way to look at it It's like you know it's just yeah, it a people join gangs it's a unit gang members are crazy it's just you need just a little bit to get people to be like look my circumstances are shitty and here's a way i can fucking do something that all like anger and

insecurity yeah right you know that's all it is and then he's like he's like what she's saying they're like the same is like the troops are so i'm not saying i'm not making a moral equivalency. He's like not and then we saw was yet the bus stops He's like yeah, I don't know you're saying get out of my car I didn't think twice about it cuz he's like you know he's kind of a goofy guy So he says stuff and then yeah like a week later the fucking FBI is coming and asked me question He'd like lie he played dumb. You know next time I saw him and they came twice they came twice Yeah, but then the FBI agents they had they had like very distinct

I mean clearly this guy was from Pennsylvania, right, you know and the Philly FBI Yeah, right. And so I was like, okay, like are you that bold Nick Mullin was he talking to like that? No, yeah, no, they asked me my Twitter account. He's like just to verify you're extremely online guy. I was like, yeah They're like that's you in the picture with like the looney tunes had on you know it's like I think my profile picture at the time I'd like gone into the dressing room at Kmart and put on the dumbest clothes they had there and I like took like a picture of myself and but it's like I mean these people just had to drive two hours to talk to like a fucking idiot Yeah, and then I initially for the government. I had no idea and then at the same time

I also I own the domain name child porn dot sexy and I it was like a website It is his finest word it was a website I set up or it's like this middle-aged man named Doug who just has a model train website And that was the only domain he could afford and he he's like, please stop calling the police on him. Please leave him alone. It's just about model trains. If you're at the website for any other reason, we don't have anything like that.

So please just, this is about model trains. He said it was my neighbor's and my neighbor's. My neighbor had to go to Thailand on business and he gave me this website so that I can use it for, and I don't know how to set up a website So please stop anyways if you're here for trains You're in the right place and you know and so I thought maybe has something to do with that or whatever So I'm like what like what could these guys possibly want, but then they started they told me You know they were like Joint Terrorism Task Force guys

And I'm like is somebody gonna kill me or something and they like now that they're really they're like yeah i like uh... you know like were conducting investigation and like you know like it's like someone of your face book friends and you know like is all of them something might be involved in something or they might be in danger and so we just want to know if you saw anything that may have a picture interest in a like well i don't know. I mean, I saw a picture of a pig with poop on its nuts the other day.

That was pretty funny. You know that picture? Yeah. No. Pig shit. It's a pig. It's got a giant nuts and it took a dump on sites. And then I ended up emailing the picture.

I was like, I was, he was like, if you think of anything, here's my information. And I was like, this he was like if you think of anything here's my information, and I was like this is the picture I saw it Responded but you know That's hilarious file Were you ever like what the fuck no cuz I saw him at the funeral and I was like explaining to a perfect time to Bring that up well cuz he came he came up to me. He's like, he's still saying weird stuff. Oh, I just got the FBI calling people. He's let off with that.

I'm like, no, they talk to you? He was like, yeah. And then he tells me the agent's name. And they didn't talk to anybody else in my family. I'm like, why the fuck is the FBI calling you about this? And then my dad was there. And I'm like, did you hear this? John said the FBI called him.

And then my dad gets mad at my uncle. And he's like, why did you tell him that? Now, he's not going gonna shut up about it. I got like annoyed that like John told me because he's like, now he's just gonna, now all we're gonna hear about is this FBI shit for the rest of them. You know, and so I was trying to figure it out and I couldn't figure it out and then I have like nieces, like I guess they're my cousin's kids that are like maybe a year younger than me.

They also live in the city so we were all taking the bus back up. And we talked for a while, and then before we got on the bus, they were like, yeah, so what's this stuff where you're like a jihadist sympathizer? I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? Is it you talking about John talking about this FBI thing? And they're like, what FBI thing? And I'm like, what are you talking about? And then I guess it's like, they were like, I don't know I John said that You were saying like Isis was good, and then you support them

And then they told my grandparents and like they were like they asked us or like do you think he was kidding or something? and I'm like No, yes, it was like they asked your grandma my not my grandma. It's my uncle, but it's their gram Yeah, I don't know I mean, but yeah, it was definitely him Hey, Radditt. I know but you do that's a family. You don't snitch. Yeah, but like you like I Was never particularly mad because it's like he thought he was doing the right thing If it genuinely if there's no spite in it, it's like this guy this guy's deluded himself into thinking It's like to me. It's like yeah, but some things are more important

He probably also got to send pig shit balls to the government Him calling like I think I have some information Fuck America Night nice guys, too They sent two guys and so the one guy asked the questions the other guy just kind of stares at you and like you know Looks at how you respond good cop bad cop type not even good cop bad cop one of them just observes I don't know if he's like a trainer or something or what I got a restaurant. Well, I'm just training I'm shadowing today, but same thing with this guy on the plane

It was a really nice guy and then it was really jarring afterwards because you hear about this yeah Yeah, I told him yeah, and I mean the emotional arc of that starting off the day being very sad that has on Nasrallah Was killed you know which they got the wrong Hassan by the way? I don't know yeah, one of the pager well no he thought that has son piqueur was killed Which is kidding we love his son yeah He's one of our he's are here is one of our best friends basically but they should have killed him and so you know I'm big anyway yeah they killed a head has bought

oh okay but that doesn't seem good because it's like that's its things are just getting worse yeah there could be a big regional home yeah a regional conflict it creates a saying where I mean he was this very like charismatic kind of figurehead and you know you just remove that from the equation it's never good. Right. It's like there's no, you know. Now there's gonna be like a real stone cold killer stepping in. Yeah and they're still doing this. Super charismatic. They're still doing this bullshit where they're like and now the Lebanese people are free to just have democracy and it's like I don't think that's probably how it's going to go at all but anyways to start today that way and then ending the day like or halfway through transitioning to like genuinely feeling kind of like sorry for uh... guantanamo bay interrogator yeah

well you felt why do you feel sorry for him? well he's again i don't want to you know i mean i had a private conversation with somebody and i don't want to nothing really in particularly bad but but he just seemed upset about the the state of affairs in the way that you know literally any kind of msnbc liberal would right you know worry about like all but authoritarianism and their xenophobes in the country has his uh... yeah all of those things and why that was upset because you know it's like you know i believe in the seem like genuinely upset and that sucks that sucks to know that like you know you can laugh at these people but that people are so worried about things and affected

by what's on the flip side you know all the MAGA people that are like you know genuinely like you know they're trying to kill him and then they're gonna get me afterwards it's like it sucks it sucks if you learn of them are living with that level of anxiety everyone's really stressed out. You know we we both do it I don't know if your if your parents are still around but like our dads are in the generation that you know You watch maybe your grandparents have the Fox News did it to them right where they're terrified about illegal immigrants And now we have our parents are terrified because they watch MSNBC and this like my dad thinks Vladimir Putin's trying to kill him. Yeah, right exactly And it's just like my mother thinks that Trump and Putin will like team together and like create some kind of them

Yeah, like people people in the judge said the Jewish side, right? You have to worry about this fucking dumb stuff, you know what I mean? I don't maybe maybe it's a survival mechanism maybe they needed to feel like that the stick around the fight was the show they're watching you know i a regardless anyways it's like are that sucks but then it was really jarring afterwards because there's a movie called missing i don't know if you've ever seen it sounds familiar and yeah it's it's a movie called missing and it's about uh... is a

based on it somewhat of a true story it's about it's like based on it's somewhat of a true story But it's like during the Pinochet coup in Chile What sorry this is oh the funny name? There was some there was an American there was several Americans that were in Chile and some of them ended up getting murdered by These like like the Revolutionary Army guys or what country was that Chile? Joe Chile, yeah Chile and like uh... like the revolutionary army guys or whatever country was actually chile yeah chile and uh... and the americans were murdered and then uh... one of them this guy's his girlfriend was liver his wife was living there with

him and he disappeared the night of the coup and they couldn't find them and she was asking for help from the state department in the state department was just basically bullshitting her and being like all were trying her best for looking into it but they're not doing anything. And she gets frustrated. Eventually her husband's father, who is like a New York businessman, a conservative New York businessman who knows a senator, you know, like comes down to Chile, and like the movie is the drama between her and him because she's like this hippie or whatever and he's a conservative. He's like, why don't you

just trust... Is this Russell Crowe? No, no. it's a much older it came out in like I think 1980 it's it's Jack Lemmon and sissy space oh yeah I've seen it but he's just asking nicely yeah initially is like taken but instead of karate he's just like please kidday can I have my son yeah Jack Lemmon is like you got to have faith in the State Department but increasingly he realizes that sissy SpaceX right right there are just bullshitting eminy can't find a son in yesterday's i'm the to to the fact that his son was in fact murdered in the state department probably news covering it up just didn't care yeah

and um... i i think there was he did sue them or something but you know that's that's the the the movie but early in the movie that the the son is still alive he's going around with his like photojournalist partner I guess and they go to some resort in somewhere in Chile maybe it's where the coup was planned from and there's all of these like Navy guys there's like American military officials and then they're having breakfast at the hotel and they talked to this kind of like you know like I don't know I can't I don't know which actor plays him but he's like one of those like kind of like, you know, like, I don't know which actor plays him,

but he's like one of those like, Texas, he's like, you know, Powers Booth style, you know, kind of like this kind of creepy Texas guy that explains, yeah, you know, retired naval intelligence and, you know, came down here for a job, think it went off without a hitch, you know, and the guy just exudes kind of like evil. So they're like shooting, like side eyeing each other

and kind of like writing it down, nudging each other. And the way this character is portrayed, it's like this is the dark cog in the machine. This is what we all visualize when it's like fucking, I mean, people read about Alan Dulles and the CIA and all of these bad things and that they're very smart and evil people, but that's like a very simple way of looking looking at it and the reality is is most of these

people are like you know cosplaying at comic-con. Well not cosplaying at comic-con necessarily but they're boring people with like boring lives and the same interpersonal interpersonal relationship concerns that anybody else has which that in and of itself is like a juvenile, like obvious analysis of the situation. But it just, seeing that up front and having the contrast with that scene and this one in my head, it's like, yeah, it's like bad things happen in the world

just like almost out of, like it's not because of any departure from what regular normal human nature is. It's just like, this is bound to happen anyways. So a guy that should just be at Star Trek conventions is like hooking somebody up to a car battery and they're like, oh, yeah, it's like, I hope I, I hope I remember to call my sister for a birthday. And it's like, as soon as I get done with work, I got, I gotta go get stuff in the house. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you have anything you want to plug any projects you're working on now podcasts Uh, you can listen to my podcast if you want to call on the gate It's with me and Geo Perez to jailbird junkies turn jokesters What happened to the third guy see he like skip you went to jail. Oh, no, he allegedly shot somebody

I mean it's on video. I mean he definitely shot Come on yeah, I as that happened. I'm not saying he's a bad guy, but he definitely shot guy Wherever he is I hope he's doing well. He was he was so funny. He was the funniest out of three of us and yeah I was a nice guy talked to him three or four times, but but yeah somebody told me he's like they just didn't catch him He's had not caught him yet. Carl. That's gotta be Yeah, Leo the jackal. Yeah We owe the hyena anywhere we could see you on the road is that cool or is it not cool? What do you mean? Like if you were on the run for something like that?

Would you find that to be exciting or like you need money to do that? Oh like Even Paola Escobar. He was like, yeah living in these Beautiful places and he ran out of money and then after he ran out of money he died. I want to get like I'm like Because my mom's dad left because of the Holocaust he looked he wouldn't be mad about that He's not gonna shoot us now. Yeah, I don't think you do that. You're dead. You're dead man My my mom's dad left cuz I don't think he'd do that. You're dead. You're a dead man. My mom's

dad left. It's the problem with that. He's gonna call me when I walk out. He's gonna be like, I can't believe you said I shot that guy. Come on bro. It's like, well you shot him. You're supposed to stick up for me there. No, no, no. I didn't say the guy didn't deserve it. I don't know what happened. Nick, what are you... I'm just saying. You're good, boy. Don't shoot me. You're vouching. I'm vouching for Nick. And you. This is a vouch? I can vouch for myself.

You're vouching for me? No, no, you need him to vouch. You can't vouch for yourself. If someone has a hit out on you, you need to get passed. That guy was funny. That guy was one of those guys where he would like aggressively call me the end yes In conversation and very touchy and water Yeah, well he would say the n-word so much and then he would say it to me And then you know I would have to be like right right?

He'd have what he'd be he'd have very intelligent conversations I'm just what's a New York thing is you just say the end New York thing now I've been here for ten years, so I got I got the Tim's the the fitted and I saw a picture you the other day Actually had your fitted on like that. Yeah, it was in New York. It's a it's a New York thing Yeah, shout out to Mary Adams de captain number two number two Eric Doing Geo's great. He's a good guy. Yeah, I like I love Geo. Yeah you can listen to us talk about prison and Heroin for an hour a week if you I saw a video of a guy talking about prison and he referred to

Hiding contraband in his ass and he said I just had a gangster that shit, but he referred to Placing things in his bum as a gangstering. Yeah, I guess that's... I thought that was a funny term. Yeah, better than boofing. I just had a gangster to that shit. I had to gangster through it, yeah. Gangster. Yeah, yeah. I G'd up.

What I was saying, apropos of going on the run, like, I feel like I'm trying to get a... Men should have a non-gay hole somewhere on their body. We should evolve that. None of my holes are gay. You know what, if you had like a pussy like on your forearm or something? Just to like protect you psychologically then we're if you're in prison and someone's like fucking your arm

So you like hey get the hell out of here Knock it off. Yeah, you wake up with somebody. Yeah, you're like can you believe this? I was in line for the phone some guy starts fucking my arm You're like talking to your parents. The ass is too... Mom, my arm is getting fucked right now. You know what I mean? The ass is already too like... Mom, my arm's getting fucked. I have to go. You know what I mean? I get it. Israel's being mistreated in the media. I understand. Can I go? My arm is being fucked by a Puerto Rican I wonder can I talk about this real quick or do we gotta talk about go go go so I

was going to Israel like I was like six years ago to see Leo is that where he is going to meet up with him yes on the the Israel Jordan border well they do a lot there are a lot of pedophiles Calling Israeli guys, yo this music is ass Nod's fucking it's really cool note over and over So there was an LMFAO Music they have the worst taste I've cousins there. They're like have you heard the imagine dragons? Oh, yeah, they're behind Those are the guys doing the genocide and behind it's like it. That's the argument that it is. It's not behind

It's bad taste. Yeah, it's bad taste Yeah well The truth is it's the same music that Palestinians listen to if they both realize that they both like a LM FAO maybe they could make they could come together they both like I'm sexy and I know it so I I thought I was gonna have this big Jewish awakening when I went to Israel what the fuck I was thinking but I if you ever been before yeah have you ever been so yeah yes yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Plenty of times. I feel like Nick would go and then like give a class to like Palestinian kids.

Like you would go right. No he wouldn't. No I would just not go. Comedy? He'd teach you about the rule of three? It would be funny to give a podcasting class to fucking Palestinian kids. He's like, it's set up, punch, tag. There was a guy, there was a comedian in New York that try to like get me to go I remember that guy yeah, dude He was nuts there was this guy this guy Ari that was like he would do comedy But he was like he was a guy that was like always trying to do a million things he hated Nick

Yeah, well no he was very nice to me initially Cuz he was like he was always trying to he was in like Kurt's circle kind of and Kurt was like in my corner So he would like you know he put me on some shitty bar show one time I met the guy one time but he would like share articles that I had written then one time I wrote one article making fun of I guess some settlers murdered a 14 year old American boy they like oh and you teased them and I made an article making fun of like how the State Department would be like you know you know not really there's no accountability for that you know it's like and he, not really, there's no accountability for that. You know, it's like, uh, and he's like immediately sharing.

He's like, this guy's an anti-Semite. He's tagging the comedy seller. He's like, where's your article about how bad the Palestinians are? And I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? Like, you know, and I didn't even, I wasn't even like engaging in an argument with him, but you know, this guy's like, you know, tagging all this stuff. And I was like, bro, just chill out. And eventually calm down. He was, but he wanted you to go to Israel with him, but you know this guy he's like you know tagging all this stuff, and I was like Bro, just chill out eventually calm down. He was it, but he wanted you to go to Israel with him after that He was like I'm putting on you know he's like I think you know he's like

I'm bringing comics out there, and he got a couple of them to go with but I was like I you know I don't know my schedule. Yeah, Ian Lara went on one of those trips. For real? Yeah Yeah, wait so what happened when you were there? So you know when you when you fly a allow like you don't just get to like check in like through the kiosk You have to like go you get questioned. Yes. Yes, you get questioned dead Did you get to get prison? No, I'm good. I'm clean gangster that be funny. Yeah, you got you got Rikers herpes Yeah, you suck this in your ass. It's a talk show

What do I get some of that? Yeah, you guys could share. Did you make that in the toilet? That's toilet vape. You got this at the commissary I'm trying to make toilet GameCube So you you go up and talk to the agent right and then you know, they're gotten question before so they She's you know they're gotten question before so they she's you know she goes um you know first time going to Israel I'm like yeah she's like why you going I'm like I'm gonna go I had a cousin who was living I want to blow up a bus stop no I'm just kidding so going there for prostitutes she goes that you speak Hebrew right I go I go no and she goes but you could read it right and I go no and she goes up but you could read it, right? And I go no and she goes but you understand it. I'm like if I can't speak it and I can't read it

You know, what what the fuck do you think and and I said that to the I didn't say what? I was like if I can't speak it and I can't read it you think I oh then you went real boric. Whoa Yeah, and I go I go I speak more Yiddish than Hebrew yeah, and she goes alright to talk to me in Yiddish I go like what do you want me to tell you to like kiss my ass and Yiddish? I was like that's and then she's like what's her favorite prayer and What was my I had I did have a favorite prayer? The Shema right and she goes she goes say it right now. I'm like there's like 200 people behind me I'm not gonna say this shema right now. I fuck with shema heavy, and I love it. Yeah

Yeah, and ever I'm in trouble. I still and then she goes Do you know is there do you know anybody else in? The middle so you were just going by yourself just going by myself. Oh, okay She was do you know anybody else in the Middle East? And you're like look, I don't know And I go I go my buddy my pal my buddy he's Palestinian he has family over there with the worst answer Mm-hmm. I was like I didn't know I was like I might go see yasser Arab Yeah, and she goes she like completely every she's just like she's like where do they live in Palestine and you know, I

Think I was like I think area be like that's right. So she's like, okay stay here and then she goes and gets I guess her supervisor and Who's one of the Harry Potter characters? He's like, what's your friend's ring? God's so he flies in and he goes bring the chance cube The boys the best I've ever like I thought we were done to the blue guy said I could go The blue elephant guy said I was good He comes over and he's like what synagogue do you go to and the synagogue I went to was reform synagogue and our rabbi she's like people call her a self-hating Jew they like

they don't like her. You was a girl rabbi? She had a girl rabbi, two girl rabbi's and so there he doesn't like that. Of course not. And then he goes what's you know he goes What's your friend's name? I tell my friend's name He goes when's the last time you saw your friend and it just so happened that we had just ran an ultra marathon together Oh, I thought you were gonna say we were celebrating on 9-eleven on the rooftops

So he's like they're like oh you are Israel So everything I'm saying is this he's like he's like ultra marathon how long was the marathon and I was like 37 miles He's like so you ran 37 miles with a Palestinian Right next to you. I was like yeah, and he's like can I see the last? Your tech I see your text messages with with him and I opened it up and I totally forgot this but his the last thing he sent me was like like a political propaganda joke about Netanyahu oh yeah so they're like leave

your bag give us your bags and give us give us your phone and they're like we're gonna walk you to the gate and so I Was you already in the country at this point or I'm not? Yeah, right and I'm like I have my phone. I got to call my mom and they're like alright here We'll give you your phone. They're like do not move from here We will come get you so I call my mom and I'm like what the fuck is going on here Let me talk to them. She's like no. This is good. It's safe Put me on the phone

So she's like you should feel safe. I'm like no my I don't want to go I don't want to go now. I want to I want to leave so dude the plane starts to board and Nobody is is coming up to me, and I see the lady I'm like yo you guys said you're gonna come talk to me and coming up to me and I see the lady and I'm like, yo, you guys said you're going to come talk to me. And she's like, just wait, wait. And I just go, listen, I don't really want to go. Do you think I could get my money back? And then she was like, no, absolutely not. No refund. No refund. That's the worst form of terrorism. You asked for a refund? You idiot. And then they come get me and they fucking they bring me into this little room

And I had to get down in my underwear. Dude, I have a story after this. Yeah, and Yeah, I had two phones on me. I forgot one was a work phone. So they were like we're giving you one phone You could have one phone But we're taking everything else your your luggage all that and you'll you'll get it when you when you get to to Tel Aviv so they walk me to my seat on the plane like this just doesn't look yeah good that this doesn't look good at all and and I go I can I have a phone charger at least I'm I said 12-hour flight And he goes the the stewardess will give you one and then I asked the stewardess for a charger

And she just she literally just laughed in my face so then And I'm sitting next to the smelliest orthodox guy in the world yeah, so his wife was here first Hey had to move because she can't sit next to another man Well by the time I landed I was like Jesus crazy fucking Jews, you know They really they're so rude bro. My computer didn't work right for the orthodox are so rude weeks It was oh you have malware on your computer right now. It is cool. They're listening guys guys in Israel They're like they won't they they're trying to change the law so that they can be drafted Yeah, and they can't really do it and they won't get those guys to sign up

So they're just blocking traffic and stuff and it's like these guys fucking rock Although the guys who don't want to be in you know what they do in Williamsburg They're doing that in Israel to stifle the war effort basically only because they like traffic It's it's over reported those guys not, they're not freedom fighting. Those guys. I know they're not freedom fighting, but they're protesting because they just don't want to do anything.

No, because they get paid by the government to be orthodox. Okay, but they also don't want to do anything. They don't want to do anything. They don't want to do anything. So it's not like, oh, this is a genocide. It's like, well, you mean I have to go to work. No!

Yeah, right. Wait, so I used to- Which is the funniest, which is the best way to protest. I was in, when I was 18, I went to Eilat, which is the southernmost city in Israel. And it's right next to the- Sort of the tombstone of- Right next to the Egypt border and- A lot of wider types and you get a sass for it all.

It's right on the Red Sea and it's right next to Egypt and it's right next to Jordan, right? And on the Egyptian side, there's a casino and so I got tanked with my friends We're like wasted and I had my passport with me and they were like, let's go over the border Let's go to the casino. Let's go gamble, right? So I'm like that sounds fucking sick. So I go I'm like a fucking 18 year old. I don't have that much money, right? So I lose my whatever $40 immediately and I'm like a casino suck man And it hurts my feelings that I used to have $40 so they're like whatever Let's go back over the border like we suck at gambling And at the border there were my passport was from when I was 15, and I had like long hair

I looked like a teenage lesbian, and I had like shorter hair was 18 at that point And they're like this is you in picture. Do you this is you and I was like yeah teenage lesbian and I had like shorter hair was 18 at that point and they were like This is you in picture. Do you this is you and I was like, yeah, it's me I know I got a haircut, but I swear it's me. This is me and they were like, okay come into the room and They made you yet. They thought I gangstered something. Oh, they went in your booty hole. They were the cough Oh, they inspected butthole Goddamn went to the cough. Oh They inspected butthole Goddamn great guys. I met a lot of good guys Alright, I think this has been a great episode. Oh, we're done. Are we done? Thanks for having me boys. I gotta go

Yeah, thanks. And again folks if you're in Charlotte, North Carolina for the North Carolina Community Fund Yeah, whatever. I've said it three times come out, please. Thanks Syracuse November