The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Abnimals Ep. 15: Covert Cops!

Episode Date: January 16, 2025

It's an axolotl! It's a seal! It's a robot coat rack to the rescue as the Abnimals infiltrate the Enforcement Headquarters to find Goshua Darnet and their hero beyond.Abnimals Theme by Justin McElroy, Eric Near (https://bit.ly/ericnearmusic) and Jonathan Coulton (https://www.jonathancoulton.com/).Additional Music in this Episode: "Slingshot", "Hellafunk", "Blood in the Water", "Awkward Cafe", and "Gearing Up" by Mr. Smith: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSk2j0fTMw9V94UGyfWrSuA?; "Taffy Machine" by Kate Kody: https://freemusicarchive.org/music/kate-kody/; "Dear Mr. Super Computer" by Holizna: https://holiznaroyaltyfree.bandcamp.com/; and "Rather Never Than Ashamed" by done with fish: https://soundcloud.com/donewithfish.Palestine Children's Relief Fund: https://www.pcrf.net/ Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

We're at the height of our powers Atop the tallest of towers To stay You'll never stop us now If you trust And we'll do it will be much Until it's turning out just like to play We've got a way

So the road is long But our mojo is strong And unless I'm wrong And I'm not We're at the height of our power We return to the action. We're back in the River City First enforcement headquarters. Axel Isle and Navy SEAL are hiding in a coat rack that they have pretended to be a coat rack robot.

I think we've become the coat rack. You've become the coat rack. The co-rack. More coat rack than abnamos. Your co-rack, you're half-man, half animal, half a coat rack. We dwell in both worlds and are master of both. Oh, man rack. A man rack.

Meanwhile, nature's greatest wonder. Nature's greatest wonder. Hey God, if you all haven't seen the stupids yet, probably our podcast is incomprehensible. I don't know why you haven't watched it. Did you guys know Bug Hall turned out to be a huge piece of garbage? A real. Oh, man.

What a bummer. Yeah, right? More like Blackfall. Who would have thought from a man named Bug? It turned out to be a stinker. So Roger Moore is shimming around in the air ducts. He has just looped the camera feed to show, I guess, being blocked by a co-wrack. So that is covered. You stole an ID from off of a desk. You need to get

the scanner. You need to get that door open. Roger needs to get out of the vent. You've got Squidmark and Hammer Ned at processing. They are agitated. Eel Patrick Harris is singing like a bird over in the interrogation room. What do you do? So the four cubicles, those are just like four desks making a square shape. Those are not walls, right? Correct. It's a bullpen. These are all just desks out in the oven. So they can see

where the vent is, correct? Correct. Okay. Okay. Roger's going to move to the back to the duct, the air vent. And I think

he's going to wait for Manrak to Do you need a distraction? Well, either a... See, I don't know how I'm going to get all the way down there and around and through that gate into those stairs without some kind of distraction. You let us worry about that. Okay. I'm going to wait here in place until you guys do something.

How's it? Okay. There's a first. I'm doing nothing. Okay, perfect. Why don't we swing around? and we can pick him up in the man rack. I think we can fit one more.

I think we can fit one more guys. There's room. Well, there's already an unconscious enforcement agent. Oh, you're right. We already do. Listen, listen. Listen. Is the vent, Travis.

Yeah. How high up is the vent? It's on the ground. It's on the ground, right? Or is it on the ceiling? It's on the ceiling. It's on the ceiling. Okay.

If you imagine this, like a drop ceiling, right? So it's not like at. Ceiling level, it's about six feet off the ground. Okay, great. Okay. Oh, yeah. All right, here's what we're going to do. And let's start rolling over towards the net.

Cool. This is awesome. Okay, as we round the ID scanner, can I go ahead and, like, since we're right here, can I just swipe the ID card on it? So wait, hold on. Griffin, I just want to make sure the sequence from Squidbark's perspective. Squid Mark is standing right next to the ID. As a sentient coach hanger rolls over in front of him.

And nobody thinks it's awareness of me, Squidmark? I'm the only one guy. You guys have established that it's a robotic, remember? That's true. Wait, if we're passing close to Squidmark, I whisper to Squidmark, um, you should know. I'll pretend to be Manrak also. We can both be Manrak.

Okay. Your friend is selling you up the river. Eel. The eel. He is totally ranting you out right now in interrogation room number two. Yeah, man. Yeah, man. It's true, man.

There's a coat. Is the coat right talking to me? Sorry, I got one of the coats too close to the scanner, and I beeped it. I'm not supposed to be capable of faults, but I guess this was an error. Check this out, check this out. I have been hacked by the walrus. Cougu-Goo-Goo-Gat-2. Eel Patrick Harris has to be stopped.

Give me a roll. Yeah, man. Yeah. Now, here's the thing. You are not lying. Oh, you're lying about being hacked by the walrus, but you're not lying about... Hold on, wait, wait. I'm lying about being a man-rack, robot AI, coat rack.

There's definitely some... lying elements. He's lying about being a seal that is lying about being... I'm a dude pretending to be a seal, pretending to be a coat rack, pretending to be another dude. Absolutely.

Let's give them... Okay. Yeah, sure. How about... Oh, to sell it, can I make like a little internet noise with my siren song as established that that is something I can do?

Yep. Hack established. Okay, any additional... Yeah, I mean, that would be 3D8 if I'm allowed to use sirens on. Yes, you are. Let's go ahead. This is still stupid. I'll do one time to shine to bump me up to four. Here we go. One success is bad, but it's not as bad as no success. Okay, with a partial success, so he is up in arms about the idea. He doesn't quite buy the hacked walrus thing.

But the idea of being sold out by his friend, by his co-conspirator, is definitely upsetting. and he stands up and starts to struggle with the guards. Awesome. Trying to make it to hammer net and telling them like, hey, I think we're getting sold to the thing. And so they start causing quite a commotion. Great. When that happens, Roger dropped down through the vent to the floor.

At that exact same moment that he's doing that before he did that, the second before. I threw Hatchet Man at the camera. The camera's disabled. You don't have to camp. The camera's been taken care of. Wait, we did? Yeah, I put a loop on it.

Remember? Oh, that's right. Yeah, that's good. Okay, I use my skill magic to retract it. Okay. I use the time turner. Awesome. Cool.

Yeah, so you successfully caused a distraction. Mostly it's Squidn Mark and Hammernet fighting with the guards about. Well, my dad is still yelling down. Yeah, he's still yelling about one. wanting to speak with whoever's in charge down there at the bottom. So he's got those people distracted. Right now, the commotion of Hammernet and Squidmark talking about their treatment. And this is entrapment and habeas corpus.

And Cameron is just saying, objection, objection. William Simpson. Quite the distraction. All right. Great. And then Roger's going to funky worm, keeping a load of the ground. He's going to do the funky worm So he can reach Manrak

Now you There is a distraction So there's no risk We're getting caught here But I do want you to roll And you don't have to come to Manrak Manrak was to hide you I mean we are right in front of the door

So I figure we can hold I want to see how well dad does the worm Funky worms Yeah sure Okay So since I'm a dancer That's got to be at least 4D8 It's 3D8

I'll give you 3D8 Okay There we go Func 8 7 and 3 With two successes is you become the worm. You are half cow, half man, half worm. Your body undulates in an incredibly convincing worm-like manner.

If anyone didn't know any better, I mean, listen, it's up to you guys, but it might even be that Lyle and Navy are confused for a moment. What is going on? Who is this worm man? We got a new player in the space. And the three of you. Welcome to the disco. Welcome to disco new ombre.

My handle is Axelile. What's your analet handle? Um, I am, um... Oh, let's see. Wait, Roger? Oh, my God, it's Roger. I know. Remember, master of infiltration, disguise.

Um... You gotta warn us when you're gonna turn into a worm like that. I thought a witch cast a spell on you for a... Call me funky worm. Okay. I'd rather not, are we ready to go down these stairs or what? Funky worms ready. Okay, I swipe the ID scanner.

Can we all kind of slip down here? Yep. Okay, what are we... Wait, what are we gonna do with our unconscious guy? Leave him here in the rack. Okay, that's great. I see no problems with that. Rack, listen, I just want to say...

Thank you, Rack. You are welcome. Our time together has been really amazing And you've helped us out of so many jams You have helped me realize so much about myself That's cool, that's so good I have gained sentience I thought that you might

Do you swear to be, are you like best friends with us still? Best friends forever So you'll stay here and just absolutely go 100% bonkers. And it could cause a huge ruckus. If there's any risk of them tracking us, right? Co-Bot is torn between new friends and oath. No, Cobot.

That's why I established before I asked that we were best friends forever. If you had minced oaths, you should have thought about that 30 seconds ago. Cobot is committed to justice and friends. Your allegiance was clear before. I made it clear your allegiance before the request. was issued. Codebot cannot handle logical fallacy. Let's see.

You can stand into my role. His circuits burn out. And now he's just a regular coat rack again. I thought I taught a rack to love. What did you do? I taught a rack to love. But I flew too close in the sun. I made him believe in love so much that he died from it.

Truly, twas music that soothe the savage rack. Okay. So we should go. Pass and you hear beep And the doors unlock I can't believe I killed my best friend You know there's a lot of talk about tragic backstories In role playing game

Not a lot of tragic mid-stories Yeah Tragic mid-sections This is my fault for believing him so much That's what happens kids And you head down the stairs Towards evidence storage and digitization Digitization's gonna take all our jobs

Man Wow All right. Wow. Hey, Tram. Yeah? For the record, I don't think I've ever seen more donuts in this in my entire life. I've always wanted to look at this many donuts at once, and I feel like I'm finally doing it.

Okay, Travis has just taken us into a room that looks like a storage place. It's a small sort of square chamber. There's a couple coppers down here, and we'll cover that in a second, but there's also what looks like 12 racks. of each track containing about 60 donuts. Oh, those are books. No, wait. Okay, I'm sorry. Trabb, I apologize.

Enhancing. Oh, you know what? They might be books, actually. Those are books, but I can see it now. You can see it, can't you? They look like bosses of a delicious donuts. Now on second glance, but those are bookshel's. Dang it.

All right. I was confused why you guys were talking about donuts. I was so excited, man. Look at all these different varieties you had. Okay, well, it's not donuts, but it's books about donuts, maybe. Yeah. Books made out of donuts. If you can find the one book about donuts in this room, you'll have unlocked the puzzle.

Okay. The three of you make your way down the stairs past the security door, and you enter a much less kind of flashy, up-to-date, you know, organized area. You've entered digitization and evidence storage. There's, you know, a couple lights out. This is clearly like the purgatory to where they send, like, any agent or clerk that has, you know, gained their boss's disapproval. In front of you, you see several boxes labeled evidence waiting to be sorted. You see racks and racks of files and notebooks all about different cases, different investigation.

You see server towers. lining a wall, some in the middle. There's definitely like kind of a buzzing noise of the cooling fans of these server towers. You see directly in front of you as you are coming down the stairs. A security monitor station, this is the person who has been tracking the cameras. Their back is currently to you, and you can see their kind of large gossamer-like wings, definitely of like an insect variety sticking out from their backs. they're facing away from you. You can't immediately see Joshua

from where you're standing, but you can definitely hear like some rummaging around and the occasional like grunting noise or affirmation noise as someone who's like sorting through things. Okay, a little dramatic irony here. I Griffin know Goshoa darnet's in the room, but we don't. Our characters don't.

That's tricky. Listen, guys. There's not much to hide around down here. I think we've got to go at this in a sort of subterfuge direction, a little deception. I think it's just three men this time, no baby. All right, leave the baby at home for this one. I mean, there's some boxes. I guess we could climb in it and do it, you know, return to the solid snake well if we want to.

There are three boxes there. Yeah. But we're not going to be able to take us forever to find, you know, the evidence that we're specifically looking for down here without a little bit of help. So let's silver tongue it. And, um, yeah. I got a different idea. Awesome. I support that.

What if we just beat the stuffing out of both of these people? Well, um, that is one option. There's just two people down here and there's three of us. So it seems to me that we could also use, um, our brawn over brains. Right. is going to, I would say, triple our felony count. Right. Only if we get caught.

Wow. Yes. I love that energy. Okay. But the first guy maybe didn't see our face, so we're still in a clear on that particular felony. We would have to kill, I think, the guys in here because there's no way they don't see us. All right.

How about this? How about Roger? No, no how about. This is what Roger's going to do. Yes. Whoa. Okay. Yeah.

No more preamble. Roger is going to climb under one of the boxes. There's an empty one there. I can see because it's open. Right on the stairs, yes. He's going to invert it, get under it, and slide across to take a position at the north end of the row of great big cases. You're blending in with the evidence. Yes.

Becoming one with it. So Roger is going to. to get under this box, and then move to a position just north of this box, just to kind of keep an eye out for whoever is on the other side of that row of boxes. Okay. That we can hear, but that we haven't been able to see. Okay, great. Yeah, give me a 2D8 roll to see how well you do that.

Wow. Five and a seven. That is two successes. You are able... Moor is on the move. Yeah. Sometimes the dice tell a story, and they know that this is Rogers' area of expertise, you make it to the box, you're under the box,

without being noticed by either the insect man or Goshua, who you assume is the one sorting through boxes and filing. Now, as far as the box moving, that is going to be a separate role. because it's going to be difficult for that not to be weird. Well, nobody's looking at him. With the box moving, as you were able to do it without being noticed, I'm going to give you 3D8 to get in position.

Wow. Holy moly. Jackpot. That's a jack. That's got to be something also. Three sevens. Sure I'm glad I'm using these now to move a box. Isn't that something triv triple seven?

It is something. You're right, man. summons angels in Biblical speaking, but I don't know how you could represent that, and nor should you. I think that's blasphemous. Yeah, I think it summons are better angels. Hey, I say it gives him a new

Mondo move. No. What? All right, what are you doing here Navy and Lyle? I mean, I want to hear what he sees. Right? If he's going over there to if he's reconnaissance him. Oh, you want to hear what he

See. Okay, great. Yeah. So Roger uses the tip of his horn to poke a little tiny pinhole in the box to look out. Surely, that doesn't need a move. No, yeah, you can. Yeah, with three sevens with like a mega camera, you're fine. So, um, you are able to see Joshua not nearly as bright-eyed and kind of self-assured as you saw him back at the stadium when you guys first met, sorting through boxes. His, you know, his uniform disheveled, grunting, and kind of going through files, looking for things, sorting, you know, statements out of files and putting them in a pile to be scanned.

But he is the only one in this area, so you are all three confident that the only people in this room are Goshoa and the insect man manning the cameras. Can I tell if he looks disgruntled or gruntled? Oh, he's disgruntled. He's very disgruntled. Now, maybe with the right kind of like pep talk, he could be regruntled. Yeah. But currently, he has no gruntles to give. Holidays are hard for everyone.

Fellows, it is our old friend, Gossil Darnett. And he is not gruntled. He is doing manual work. He looks like what we call in on my planet. Well, you're in a perfect position now to take him out. Take him down. Bring him out. Bring him down.

Take him down. Yes. But perhaps there's another. I mean, yeah, man. Yeah, well, there's always another way. I am under. Perfect. Okay.

Now, Travis, I noticed that all of the three boxes have moved with that. Am I to understand that dad is scooting those? No. I think you're to understand that that particular token is a set of three boxes. Okay, God. I can't separate. I think I'm going to wait and observe. I will give you this, Dad, while you wait and observe, with that triple seven, I'm going to say, like, you're in, like, position to, like, hold a move kind of thing, right?

That you're poised and ready. And, like, you have the opportunity that when the next thing happens that you want to do. you're in crime position to do it. We just like pulled back the crank on the trap. Exactly. Mark, Clint. All right. And it's like, who's Clint?

Sounds good. All right, Navy and Lyle. You guys, I'm going to put you more towards the bottom of the stairs. Okay. What are you guys up to? What are you, what's your move? There's three more boxes. But you took them all with you.

No, there's another three. Just kidding. So, now at this point, I will remind you that as far as anyone manning a camera would see, there's no, like, mounted suspicion on there end. Between you guys coming in to,

like, the antechamber of the headquarters, to moving through the headquarters, you have either explained your behavior or covered your behavior well. Great. So we'll just kind of Wait.

Huh. I'm trying to think... I still have the ID badge, right? Correct. I'm going to step out into the room, looking similarly disgruntled. And I'm just going to walk... I'm just going to walk over to this desk in front of Fliven.

Just like, oh, it's unbelievable. I can't be pleased this. Oh. Stupid, stupid chief. Hello. Doesn't see my talent. Hello there. Oh, hey, you must be my new cellmate.

I got us down here, rotten together. I'm Flavin, the festus, security guard. Oh, Flavin. Oh, how's it going? You must have been down here a while. I don't recognize you. You see, before you, half-man, half-fly. Big old bug eyes, similar to your own,

but in a much more insectoid manner. Maybe that was the buzzing we heard. He sees you And immediately recognizes you What? And says Oh, were you able to take care of those techno spiders? Yes.

As you might imagine, I hate those guys. When you say he recognizes me He recognizes you from the antechamber When you guys came in and ended up smashing the computer. with Hatchet Man, and you explained it away by saying that there was a swarm of techno spiders you were attempting to kill. Oh, right. And you remember that the security cameras sort of nodded and accepted your explanation. Oh, right, yeah. Yeah, the techno spiders, the chief didn't like me smashing the stuff up, and so he demoted me.

This, that's bull crap. Techno spiders must be dealt with. with extreme prejudices. That's what I'm always saying. Oh, I should introduce myself. I look down at the ID card. My name is Detective Ringo Dingo. Please write that down. I'm going to need a moment.

I'm going to dig a moment. Because, like, I've already side story. Detective Ringo Dingo. It's all I can think about. You know, I've solved, I've cracked a lot of cases and put away a lot of perps, but they, you smell.

one computer to get some techno spiders and the chiefs since old detective ringo dingo. Am I right? The red tape's got wrapped around my throat and it's choking the life out of me in this great country of ours. Anyway, uh, what did they send you down here to do? What's your assignment? Uh, they said I've got to run inventory, which is like, this isn't a, this isn't a Walmart, you know, like, I, I, I didn't know that we did that, but they said I had to do inventory on

all of the evidence, which is crazy. You must have been sent down to help Joshua. Yep. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm getting the old Joshua treatment. Goshwa tree? No, Joshua treatment.

Oh, sorry. I misheard you. So anyway, it looks like I'm supposed to start. I just shuffle some papers that are like already on the desk. With most recent crimes going backwards, starting on the date of the bill. museum heist. I see. Yeah, so where would I go to find that stuff?

And I'll do all the inventory on that. Yes, those files over there. And he points, unsurprisingly, towards the same filing cabinet that Gasha was going through. Not the same section, but that is the rack of filed reports that need to be digitized. All right I'll get started on that What are you working on? Flavin, old buddy

I man, the security cameras Oh Well, you look pretty beat They have They got some Vegan muffins upstairs And uh Folks are just chowing down on those

You could uh Take a little break of rooski If you'd like I'm more of a sugar water man Myself Oh Um Um

Cool. Well, there goes that idea. I'm just trying to help out my new pal. Do you have any sugar water? I got water, and I think we could probably scrounge up a little sugar. Okay, from the stairwell, I will call out, Hey, Dingo, hurry up. They just put out a bunch of sugar water to go with the dessert. No way. Yeah, great. Do you hear that, Fliven? Sugar water.

Yeah, that's what he said. fly, and you heard it as well as I did. I shouldn't leave the security cameras unflied. I'll fly them for you. There's no problem there. But I thought you were sent down to file.

Yes, that I can do later. I want to help you because I think you look so sad down here. And it might just be the fluorescent lighting. I'll need to call someone down to cover the cameras. I can tell you,

can do that, Flavin. Why are you making a big deal out of it? I was a detective. Flavin, I can know how to keep an eye out for dangers. There's a system for this, guys. You can't just argue back and forth. We have laws. They're called dice. You have to use them to resolve this. So, Fliven has made it clear to you that you were sent down the file, and that was what you were talking about doing. It doesn't want you to split your attention. So you need to- Got you, got you. I'll call down. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Hey, guy who just yelled down here about the sugar water. Detective... Prowl... Sheridan. Did you say Palf... Detective Prowdherden? Ralf. Browth.

Prowth. Prowth? Prowth. With a B? With a Pee. Prowth. Hey, peanut. Get down here, pal. Hey, well, did I hear right that I'm Pralph?

Here's deceiving me, man, or am I Prouth? I want to... I walk up to Prout. and give him a big hug. That's my man. Pralph and Ringo, always tearing it up. Wait, you're Ringo?

Ringo? Wait, you get to be Ringo and I'm Pralf? I show him the ID card. I'm not kidding you. The name is Detective Ringo dingo. Where did you get a card? I took it. Hold on.

Let me go back up there and look and see how you're finding a card. No, you're not going to find a card that says Pralf. There might be a Prouf. Probably not. Anyway. It's more common. Prowl is like a. Wait, maybe there's a card clip to one of the coats in the coat, right?

Yeah, that's what I'm hoping. I think if I poke around, there might be one Pralph. Anyway, Flavin, yeah, Pralph, he does our steakout stuff, and he's with me. So he'll watch the cameras. That's what he does all day. Yeah, I'm jacked on vegan muffins. I need to distract myself. Yes, they'll get to you.

Griffin, give me, since you had another person. Yeah. And very convincing sugar water help from. from Lyle there. Give me a 48 roll. Yes. To convince Flavin. Easy.

Three successes, seven, five, and six. I mean, yeah, that's the countdown. That's inside straight. I mean, yeah. Okay, but only for a little sip. I'll be back. It's in the parking lot. Sorry, what?

Sorry, Griffin. I hate to be that guy. No, the party's... I think you know that you can't add on to the grimmis after the rolls of stuff. I can, I can't. Because if he just goes upstairs, it's going to fall apart instantly. Three successes. The party's in the parking lot.

Griffin, I was thinking about that, too. My thing, I was just going to... I was going to punch him out when he went in the stairwell, and you guys were going to get so mad because that would have undone all the good work. He's a fine man. No, don't punch him out. He's going to the parking lot. But there's nothing there, Griffin.

You said it yourself, the moment he gets upstairs and starts looking for muffins. That's what I'm saying. He's got to go to the parking lot now, Juice. Oh, yeah, it is in the parking lot. Good point, Ringo. Well, I have no reason not to trust you. Great. And Flavin exits up to the parking lot to go look for whatever jug of sugar water he has been promised.

Okay, we got like 30 seconds. So. Okay, can we, before we do anything else, I need to establish Trav. sight line-wise, has Joshua been watching this exchange, or where are we doing? Let's roll for that, because right now... I think we've established he's behind that roll boxes. This is what I'm just trying to say... He can't see over...

Okay. Okay. Then I think it probably makes sense before we start doing stuff on computer to let dad maybe do something with Joshua, would be my gut, but I don't know. Yes. Navy, give me a perception role for when you were back over at the computer. Okay. Bug eyes. Here we go. Calbunga, baby. Super ultra-Mega, two-eights. Double-eighths. While you are at the computer station, when Flavin Hands Upstairs, a notification comes across the computer and prints out that processing is wrapping up with the three Bayside batch.

Okay. And they will soon be brought down to the holding cells. Oh, that would be bad. And you can also see that Eelpatrick Harris has been marked to be sent to Governor's Island, which the three of you know is sort of like a maximum security gated community on an island off the coast of River City that was established by Governor Kildeth, also where he retired to. But the maximum security, unlike a traditional gated community, is to keep people in. So it is for kind of the most extreme perpetrators that the River City First Enforcement come across. That's curious.

If he turned state's witness, why would they be sending him to maximum security? It is very strange. I agree. Okay. I take note of that. Can I take the, you said it printed out, which is crazy. They must go through a lot of paper of every notification. They're well-funded.

Yeah, sure. I'll take that piece of paper. And, yeah, now I have that. Guys, we got like not much time. They're about to send the Bayside baddies down here. If we're going to do something, we've got to do it right now. Well, since we don't have much time, really wanted to try to convince Joshua. Gosh, would have us.

Hey man, do it. If that's what you want to do, do that. No, you know what? I tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to charge at him. Oh, man. With my horn that's already sticking through the pinprick hole and ram the other horn through that. And I'm going to try to shock him.

That is my cattle product. That is what you're going to try to do. I just want to take a step back here to say how much I love being the zookeeper for this game. because like two and a half episodes ago you guys were like, I know, we'll go in and apologize to him. And like that was the plan that you guys established.

And now you're here and you're like, I know I will tase this man unconscious. So tag, I did say that I wish I had time to talk to him but it doesn't sound like I do. I mean, talking is a free action. You would have time to talk to him,

but we're on a pathway now. Give me a thing. 3D8 roll to see how well. Actually, I'm going to end. Since you had a held action, go ahead and add two dice to that, because you definitely have the element of surprise here. 5D8? 5D8 to trink him with your taser horns. One success.

That's crazy. That's when it dries up. One, two, three, four, seven. With a mixed success, he does not go unconscious, but the shock does cause him to kind of go flying backwards and his radio goes skittering across the floor out of his reach. Okay. What the

do that box just shock me? What? Do I see him? Did I see that? Did he fall like in one direction? You saw the box charge and you hear his voice talking. But you are still over the stairs. I will I'll rush over to

grab Goshua. Okay. Give me a, let's see. You're a bulky, are you a bulky boy? I'm a bulky boy. I don't know that I, I mean, I'm an axolotl, but I don't know that I'm particularly bulky. Okay, yeah, give me, this is your training,

this is your abs, so give me a 3D8 roll since you have training in abs to grab a hold of him. One success. Okay, we make success attempting to grab a goofus. You are able to move to Goshua. before he is able to regain his feet, you have a hand on him, so you're like tentatively in control of the situation,

but you definitely don't have him grappled. It's okay, man. It's okay. We're here to apologize. We're really, really, really sorry. Roger throws the box off. It was my understanding. We were here to apologize.

Yes. And that's why I only did a, shock on you instead of giving you the full brunt of my cattle prod. It's your guy's fault that I'm down. I got to mo, I'm a clerk again. We know, we apologize. We're just apologized. We're going to help you get moated. That's right. Remoded? Remoted. Remoted. You're going to be remoded. What are you guys doing here? There's odd dealings afoot. Sorry? Yes.

There's bad business afoot. Gosh. and you're the only one who can do something to stop it. Something's going on. That stinks and it goes all the way to the top and you're the only person we can count on to stop it. Will you be our Casey? Sorry. We need a man on the inside.

Do you understand? Okay. I have gathered that from what you're saying, but like any further details would be appreciated? There's a new point. player in town and he's got his sticky dirty fingers in all the big pies.

He goes by a handle of the walrus. And he's got everyone answering to him. The governor, probably the chief, I think. And maybe it may roll up as far as your boss, a

walrus. Walter Russell? The billionaire philanthropist? I know, I know, but he even he may be answering to the walrus. He may be involved. There's no way. He's a beloved figure in town. Everything he does is to benefit because the people of the city. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know I'm talking a little nonsense. What are we thinking? What are we thinking? We need to see what went down at the museum because there's a piece of the pie. Sorry, not pie. I don't want to mix my metaphors. Yeah, I'm confused because he had his

dirty, sticky fingers in a pie and now you want to eat the pie. But this isn't a pie. It's something happened at the museum. The Greenback Guardians are involved. What? And yes, something has happened that is going to be the end of this city as we know it. Unless you, Goshoa, can be our Casey, our man on the inside, our human liaison. What do you say, partner? And this will be like working with the Greenback Guardians.

In a way, yes. Is that good? I am where I am. Like, I started this as a kid because I love the green bat. They're my heroes. Okay. Do you want to meet two of them? Yes.

Awesome. You can show us the museum stuff, and we know where two of them are. And I bet by the end of our little escapade, we'll find the other ones. Griffin, roll 66. Or 68. Yes, baby. Roll 68. To three successes, two eights.

With that mega cowabunga, you see him take a second. Take a breath and say, okay, what do you need for me? Where's the stuff from the museum? The evidence. We've got to know what was taken. Uh, okay, hold on. And he goes shuffling through a file. And he's like, okay, yeah, here's the, like, the evidence manifesto list.

How does this help? No, not manifesto. Excuse me. Manifest. That's what, that's the thing that's funny. I, the evidence believe that our government. The evidence manifest. list. How does this help?

Uh, well, let's freaking find out. We want to cross-reference with what you have in evidence. You need to call Dean. Why? You guys... He's standing by to cross-reference the stuff, remember? Okay, we have a list

of what the museum had on display at the exhibit. We need a list of what the RCPF... Is that right? No, that's Raccoon City. Which is a totally different animal city where it's some pretty gnarly stuff. Yeah, that was the, it started as like their raccoon preserve, and

then they like started building just kind of rudimentary structures and government and everything. It sucks what's going on over there, man. My brother-in-law's record. Oh, really? Well, the fun... The Funbrella Corporation started

doing a lot of crazy sights over there. It got pretty yucky perfect. Anyway, we need to know what... Yeah, but the benefits really outweigh the cost when you think about it. I need to know what... For now. But I've heard... My brother-in-law works in the labs.

And he said some really messed stuff going on. Oh, man. They've got a laser grid. Anyways, listen, here's a deal. My seventh best friend, Dean, is waiting at our office with a list of what was gone from the museum. We just need to know what you have at the RCFE. Okay, well, I mean, here's the list of everything that we recovered. All right, let me call Dean.

Dean man here. Dino. I don't like that. No. You got Dean. But you're not a man. Yeah. Okay.

Bryn and Barrett, you've got Dean the Quala, man. All right, Dean. Here's the deal. I got two imaginary lists, and they're both in the brain of the same man. Okay, just snap a photo, the one you have, and send it over to me. All right. I'm sending it to you now. Can you compare these two lists you have?

Yeah, hold on. Give me one. Okay. I should have used the fax machine, I see. We should have just brought the list with us. Let me read it out loud. Okay, it seems like there's only two things missing from the evidence list you sent me. One is Carver's signature, you know, his bat slugger.

We knew that on that, right? And a videotape that contains the unaird pilot of the, the real Greenback Guardians animated series. Whoa! Who would steal that? And that is when you hear the beep from the top

of the stairs of the security door being slight... Gosh, is there another way out of here? Um, just, okay, get over behind those boxes. The only way out is through the holding cells and you don't want to go through there. So just...

We'll go through the whole boxes, three boxes. There's three boys, let's go. And you throw the boxes over your head as you hear footsteps coming down the stairs. Maximum Fun. A Worker Owned Network of Artist-owned shows. Supported directly by you.