The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Commitment - Episode 1

Episode Date: October 19, 2017

Our new heroes attend a corporate mixer for the Do-Good Fellowship that will change the course of their very lives. The first chapter in Clint's superhero story, taking place inside of the Fate system. Remy embarks on a slider quest. Nadiya threatens a co-worker. Irene solves a particularly difficult employee benefit issue. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

Hey, hi everybody. Welcome to the Adventure Zone. I am your internet father, Clint McElroy. Don't say that. That's bad. That's weird. Is that a bad thing? Yeah, it's no good.

Definitely a weird look. All right, I'll back off of that. I am your GM, your game master. The general manager, along with my three sons. Go ahead and identify yourself, guys. I want to say this is a weird start. Are we assuming that people listening to this? have never heard this before?

Yeah, I'm anticipating a whole new influx of new blood. My name is Justin McElroy. I'm the oldest brother, and I'm portraying the dual roles of Irene Baker and Cardala. I'm Travis McRoy. I'm the middleest brother, and I am portraying Nadia Jones. Folks around here call me Griffin McRoy. I'm playing the role of Remy, and I'm going to try to watch how much I talk, because I got a lot of tweets from people, maybe a little mean spirit, accusing me of backseat DMing

during the world-building episode we did. And so I'm going to watch that because I was very sensitive about that and it did hurt my feelings. And maybe it was, maybe it was on me, but words hurt and my feelings are fragile. Well, here's the real question we have to address then is, is it, let's take it back to backseat driving? Is it backseat driving if the driver has no idea where they're going and you and the backseat are giving helpful to direction. If the driver of the car is some sort of baby who's never driven a car before or perhaps a big wild dog who jumped in through the window, yeah, I would backseat drive on that one.

I'll tell you what, if I get us lost, you guys could step in. How does that sound? Okay. That sounds good. We should mention that you should go listen to the World Building episode if you want to know everything about the thing we're doing because I think dad just kind of wants to hop into it, right? Yeah, and there'll be some recapping involved in that process. Can we'll say, we'll say, we did like a whole hour and a half long episode.

Yeah, we did a lot. We should also mention that we're using Rule 20, and we're going to not refer to the board that you put together, because the visual element won't necessarily carry over, but there's a lot of very good, very stretched out J-Pets on this baby. A lot of... A lot of... Dad put together this imagery, and there's a lot of fun with aspect ratios happening. Yeah, that's really... It looks like there's three laser barriers. I like that in Dad's clip art search, he apparently found two, like, people kind of icons, and the rest are a cat, what... It looks like a blood splatter but purple, a glowing blue eye, a brain. A floating brain.

I can't wait to talk to brain. I went ahead and screencap this, so somebody tweeted me and remind me, and I'll get it out there for you. Dad, weave, weave us a tail. I want it. I shall. I'm ready. All right. You three are brand new recruits to an organization called the Do Good Fellowship.

And it basically is a humanitarian organization that goes around the world helping people in trouble. It's a very simple edict of what they do. And you three are part of the newest expansion of this organization. Up till now, they've been sort of like a think tank, creating ideas, identifying trouble spots, but now they want to get boots on the ground. So they have instituted a new program where they are bringing in their next circle, I guess. And these are operatives and you are three of the 12 new operatives that are being brought in. So your three characters were brought in on these really cool little VTOL, vertical takeoff and landing ships called skimmers, called so because they kind of skim along the surface of the

water or on the land or whatever and reported to a place that you have affectionately named. Just to clarify, they do vertical takeoff and landing and get two inches off the ground. It doesn't fly real low. It's not what they're designed to do. It's just all the pilots that the fellowship are just real, just cocky pieces of shit. I want you to visualize this, that there's this spray up behind them as they skim alone. Oh, I got that spray. I got that spray.

Oh, yeah, spray locked in. It's very baywatchy. Are we on the Berg right now, the headquarters for the fellowship? Yeah, we have flown into the Berg, which is the giant floating platform headquarters for the Do Good Fellowship. that is located towards the middle of the Gulf of Mexico. So it's outside of United States territorial waters and outside any other. I do a murder because nobody can do anything about it. What's up?

Yeah, I open a floating casino. You have, it is a giant floating casino of hope. So right off the bat, when you land, you land separately, there's three different vehicles. These skimmers, by the way, are like drones. They operated from the actual burg themselves. What's the beverage service like? There are some light beverages, but if you want wine or beer, you have to pay. That's how they get it.

Everything else is complimentary. And there's peanuts. And these are especially grown peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. Oh, okay. So I was going to say I'm allergic to peanuts. You're saying I've eaten peanuts for the first time. Yeah.

And I'm adding, by the way, the aspect allergic to peanuts to my sheet. So the very first event, you're greeted by your three department heads, your separate department heads. Remi, you are in information technology. Irene is in humanities. And Nadia, you are in research and development. So you are greeted by your three department heads. Nadia's department head is named Joe. Remi's department head is Potts.

And Irene's department head is Grace. You will be meeting all three of these like right now. So after a quick stop to freshen up in your quarter, you go to this what they're calling a mixer, and that's where our first scene takes place. Question one, is it mandatory? Yes. Okay.

Then Nadia is there. Okay. Right off the bat, you're mixing with strangers, so I know that's not exactly Nadia's wheelhouse. It's not that she can't do it. I want to be clear. It's not that she can't do it. It doesn't prefer it.

She has more important things to do with her time. Remy's pressing the flesh. Gross. Gross, gross, gross. Is that an aspect? Is that one of her aspects? What? Yes. She has better things to do with her time than... That's not really an aspect. That's just a fact. It fits in with my overarching aspect of values logic over humanity. Hyper-focused scientist, I would say that falls under.

There you go. Okay. Well, when you walk in this gigantic room, it's called the Fellowship Hall. And it's kind of a general purpose meeting, debriefing, you know, kind of a... a very flexible arrangement. And you notice when you walk in through the door, there are three screens covering almost the entirety of the other three walls. Directly in front of you is a great big screen that has the 24 questions logo, the 24 question mark logo, which is very important to the Do Good Fellowship. And that screen has like this big representation of the logo on it and kind of a scroll

at the bottom that's keeping you up to date on local weather and, you know, events going on. Yeah, yeah, and music that's playing. We'll get to that in just a minute. But in front of that screen, great big, free, open, self-served bar. Nice. So right off the bat, the bartender is an anomaly in my graphic. Tell me more about the bartender, because he looks very stretched out. He's not.

That's not there. I shouldn't have. Is that his power that he can stretch super good? Yeah, I tried to crop him out, but I've failed. No, no, no, dad. I'm sorry, I know you're new to this, but when you GM a game and you have the chance to create a bartender, you create the hell out of that bartender. You need to make a bartender.

So, well, there's, well, let's just say that one of the department heads is, is working bar. That's fun. Oh, let's say Parson. And Parsons is tending bar just as a lark. This is a very small operation. There are 24 people on this base covering all these different jobs. And Parsons is the Department Head of Risk Understanding. And I know this because Dad has helpfully created a cheat sheet of all the characters and their positions.

On the left side wall, the giant projection screen has this really cool, like, color-coded map of the Berg. where all the different sections are. And every so often, it'll zoom in and show the different, the people that work there and show some of the things that they do, kind of an industrial film about the Do Good Fellowship. And over on the right side, projection screen is just cutting to different shots of the actual mixer, the different people at the mixer and what they're doing. Maybe there's some dancing. There's a dance floor in the middle of people are dancing because the music is playing constant. In front of that screen is this really cool high-tech jukebox where you just go, it's voice activated, and you can make a request of practically any song on the planet.

And so you look up on that screen, the middle screen, and there's a part of the scroll is the songs that are playing and who thereby and who requested it. So there's music playing. You've got the bar in front of the top screen. You've got the jukebox on the right side. There are four tables about chest high, abdominal high. No seats. There's no chairs. This is a mixer.

They don't want people sitting and just stay in there. And then you've got four tables at the different corners of the room with all kinds of different food, all finger food, topas kind of thing from all over the world, different things. They got sitters? Any what? Sliders? They need sliders? Oh, they make sliders of every...

There's a whole table of nothing but sliders. But sliders, gross. Remy's going on what he's called a slider quest, which is he's going from table to table, just trying all the sliders, because maybe there's different sliders at the other table. No, this is the same slider, but I'll keep trying. All four of these tables have all these different kinds of foods

and all these different really interesting things. And like I said, the jukebox, the songs don't stop. People keep going up the jukebox. jukebox and make a song request. You got the four food stations. You got the full open bar where you could serve yourself. Um, but Parsons decided he'll just have some fun and, and he'll get up there. Alphabet City by Prince requested by Abby is playing right now. At least that's what the scroll says. And so I look at, I look at Abby and give her big thumbs up. Yeah. Good call. It's playing. So you got your four tables. Six people at a table.

table and the table that you are at right now is the table that has you three and your three directors sitting there. So this seems to be kind of the meet and greet portion of the mixer. So take the opportunity to kind of get to know each other. Your department heads have introduced you just barely. But, you know, I think everybody at the table would like to know a little bit about you. So. Nadia gets up to go request a song. Okay. What is Nadia request?

I'm going to type it in the chat. Oh, boy. Okay. If it's going to be like LMFAO, that would be quite a surprise for... Oh, Justin actually wrote Aspect, Allergic to Peanuts. Thank you. Okay. That's a very good song for Nadia.

She blinded me with science is playing by Thomas Dolby. So it says, she blinded me with science by Thomas Dolby, requested by Nadia. So that starts thrumming up after Alphabet City. Grace? I wanted you to know, I checked on Godfrey's insurance. You were asking me, he'll be eligible next month, the first of the month, if he wants to switch, because it's on an every six-month basis. So he'll be able to switch then.

That's nice. Irene, but this is a party, honey. This is a party. You don't have to worry about working. I know. Yeah, I know. know, I just wanted to let you know that I'll, so I'll check it with him on it. Yeah.

Sorry, I'm really nervous. I don't worry. Do you want to share a little bit, honey? But, you know, with your person, do you have to tell each other about each other? Do you want to tell everybody about yourself? You guys want to ask, ask Irene a question? No. I feel like I know, I probably know Irene, because I have an aspect that is sort of Irene

focused, unless you don't want that, unless you want this to be the first time we met. But I'm just thinking she's in human resources. I've probably dealt with her at some point. Probably not. She's met. I feel like she's probably met everybody, but on a pretty cursory basis. Yeah, you've only been here for like a day or two. So, you know, you know about each other.

You know about each other, Remy, because you're in information technology. I've read their emails. And you've been gathering information through the process. You guys went through this really long detailed interview process and screening process. to get vetted. So do you guys want to share anything about each other? Yeah, so I look at Irene and I say, I'm actually pretty relieved because for a second there, I thought you were asking us to say, Grace, before we ate dinner, which seems like an irresponsible thing for somebody in HR to do. Do you want a slider? And I motioned to the

pyramid, the slider pyramid that I built on the table. Yeah. What kind are they? Meat and bun, but just take it from the top and not from the bottom because I don't want it to fall over. I've worked pretty hard on this. Is the top one? Is that okay? Yeah, I didn't touch it super a lot. Okay, I'll have the top one. Thanks. And she, and she does. Adding aspect

slider fall. Nadia during this is scribbling out various formulae on napkins, on cocktail napkins. I look at Nadia and I say, you know, it's a party, right? I don't think we have to be

working right now. Oh, no, this is fun. I'm, I'm, I'm, it's a thought experiment where I try to challenge myself to see if I can come up with a formula that I can't solve. So far, not yet. I just want to check on something. This is Justin now. I just want to know sort of what the next few months of my life are going to be like. Are your guys character voices just not just they're just you guys? Mine's more, mine's kind of me, but like, very positive. Is this your way around the Justin McElroy? character voice sort of policing. I was trying to come up with a character voice for Nadia, and I feel like it'll find itself. Yeah, let's not sweat it. I don't want to force it. And I'm doing 22 character voices at least. Yeah, tell me about it. So, that's great. Um, um, I asked Nadia if she can use math to help me with my burger pyramid.

Maybe there's some way that I can make it sort of more structurally sound using some sort of formula. You want you want me to stop what I'm doing to help you figure out how to stack your small burgers? Burger pyramid. Yeah, they're, yeah, sliders. They call them sliders. There's a name for it.

Okay. Maybe you could try eating one small burger at a time and leaving some for everyone else? Oh, no, I'm going to wimpy down on pretty much all these, but... Great, great, great, great. I'm going to go back to my napkin now.

Excuse me. Nadia, I hate to interrupt. I did want to mention just as long as we're both here. Yes, HR person. I did still need your expense reports for your meals on the way in here. Right, right, right. I asked everybody to send those in as soon as you can. No, no, no, no, totally.

It's not a big of a rush. I'm sorry, I'm just, yeah, you know what? That one's on me because I was working on life-saving technology and science, but you know what, now that you mention it, It is important that I get you that Wendy's receipt. So, hell yeah, Wendy's. Cool. At this point, Joe speaks up.

Listen, there, Nadia, this is a party. And everybody, start tomorrow, you guys are going to be pretty busy with your work and with the big changes in your life. So why don't you just blow off a little steam and get to know. other, okay? Love that. Love that voice, dude. Where are you from?

Fargo. Excellent. Dad got about three seconds into that before Travis typed in the chat aspect. Nadia does not care for Joe. Well, you know, nobody does like their boss. Nobody cares for their boss. Like three syllables. Just then, she blinding with science is starting to end.

It was a big choice, too. Put quite a few people on the dance floor. Excuse me. He goes into request it again. Well, before it plays, everybody wants to rule the world by Tears for Fears, requested by Martine. That shows up.

After a few minutes of this incredibly warm and bonding conversation, Hugh gets up. Where did I put Hugh? Is Hugh the floating brain or the cat? Diversity inclusion. Yeah, diversity and inclusion. Okay. So Hugh gets up and Hugh says, hi everybody, my name is Hugh.

Welcome. Hi, Hugh. Get together. I'm happy to have you all here. Now, I'm kind of introducing the next phase of our little program. I like everybody, if you aren't already at your tables, to please move to your tables. and the other department heads are bringing to your tables, where to your spot.

These, well, I guess we're called them swag bags. These swag bags are our gift to you, but more than just gifts. There are things that you're really going to want to use. There are an iPod touch in here? I didn't know how bad I wanted to hear that voice say the word swag until you did it. And now it's changed. Swag bag.

And we welcome you to the Do Good Fellowship here at the Berg. And we are based, I think you already know this from your own research and from when we talk to you, that we are based on the old concept of the Honto that Ben Franklin started centuries ago. And every meeting of the Honto started with 24 questions. And those 24 questions are very important to how we all. operate here at the Do Good Fellowship. So I think you all have copies of them. I'd like to share those questions with you. I'd like you to each take a couple and read them out loud. And so, so this is kind of like our pledge of allegiance, but we'll do it separately. I'm going to start

with this table over here. And you hear these voices, and they start to read the 24 questions. have you met with any thing in the author you last read remarkable or suitable to be communicated to the junto, particularly in history, morality, poetry, physics, travels, mechanic arts, or other parts of knowledge? What news story have you lately heard agreeable for telling in conversation? Three, hath any citizen in your knowledge failed in his business lately? And what have you heard of the cause? If you were to look over at Irene during this, you would note, and you looked closely. you would notice her mouthing the words. She's like deeply, deeply into this.

Well, then let her go next. I also, I also want you to know that when number three years read, have any citizen and your knowledge failed in his business lately, Nadia's just like staring at Remy. I did my best. I don't notice because I'm taking notes because I really want to ace this test. Let's start with your table. Irene, why don't you start? What unhappy effects of impertinence have you lately observed or heard of imprudence of imprudence of passion? of any other vice or folly.

Have you or any of your acquaintances been lately sick or wounded? If so, what remedies were used and what were their effects? Remy, would you take over, please? Oh, can I do what? I'm sorry, can I do one more? Okay, do one more. Tens my favorite. Who do you know that are shortly going on voyages or journeys

if one should have the occasion to send by them? Okay, Remy? Yeah, sure. Do you think of anything at present in which the junto may be serviceable to mankind to their country, to their friends or to themselves. Hath any, hath? When was this?

Okay. Hath any deserving stranger arrived in town since last meeting that you heard of, and what have you heard or observed of this character or merits? And whether you think you, it lies in the power of the hoon toe to oblige him or encourage him as he deserves. This is out of character. Listener, that was number 12. We're halfway there, baby.

We told you it was going to be rough going. We're going to read this very... I thought something was going to explode. Honestly, I thought we're going to get three questions in, and he was going to be like, And then Skeletor is like, fuck all this. All right, can we post this too? Yeah, sure. Yeah, post the whole list and we'll move on.

And then they did the rest of them and everyone was into it. And then as a propeller spun, it cut to the end of the list. Number 24, do you see anything amiss in the present customs or proceedings of the Honto, which might be amended? Ooh, good. I'm glad you skipped to that one. Yeah. And this is like the Kiwanas, that they say the Kiwanas pledge at the beginning of of every lunch meeting they stand there and they read these 24 questions well the koanists don't have 24

24 hour and 15 minutes has passed we shall begin the meeting of the junto so we're going to give you a little bit more time to uh to check out your uh your swag bags so uh these swag bags are it's not really fair to call them the swag bags because they do have a purpose they're almost they're like cylindrical almost made of uh made of a kind of unusual fabric Like a duffel bag, but you can wear it as a backpack or you can wear it as a duffel bag. And there's a flap, and the flap has a triangular indentation on the front of it. I think there's been some kind of mistake because my swag bag is just filled with coosies. No, you haven't opened it yet.

It's just like 70 coosies in here. Is that weird? You haven't opened it yet. I have an aspect which is just restless. So I think like I'm definitely into these questions. I definitely want to do a good job today. It's very important to me that I do that. But, like, I am definitely opening that bag, like, while the last few questions are being read, because I just can't wait anymore.

How did you open it? I popped open that triangular latch. I started to fill with that. How did you do that? With my adult hand. No. Well, you're close. Your tongue.

With my tongue. Do you want me to French kiss the bag? I try to French kiss the bag, but I guess that. Not yet just watching this. With your fingerprint. Okay, I stick my thumb right in that opening. And it pops open. Y'all, just thumb it.

Just thumb it, right in there. Thumb it. Yeah. You all do that. Inside these swag bags, the first thing you notice are these really cool vests. These are like utility vests in the fact that there are inside pockets and outside pockets. These will hold all your electronics, your cell phones, your tablets, or anything else. and they're like a dark charcoal gray.

And you notice there's another triangular indentation on the left breast of these vests. I put my fidget spinner in it and spin it. It doesn't. I don't think anything happens there. I don't think that was the solution in the puzzle, but I just wanted to establish Remy does have at least one fidget spinner. Inside the swag bags, in addition to that, are triangular badges that have the 24 question mark logo on it. But when you touch it, boom, a picture of you pops up on the badge.

It is triangular shaped. It is triangular shaped. I take the badge and I put it on the vest where the holes. And it kind of makes a little sound. And more information about you pops up on the badge, your name, your department, and your DH. Like Remy, Remy loves gadgets and tech shit so much that this is just, this is one, this is wonderful for him. He is, he is, with childlike glee, just opening all the pockets and, and touching all the things. Nadia doesn't really wear badges.

Well, I had a question, does Nadia, like, know about this stuff ahead of time? Because we talked about that a little bit, that she's in R&D, which I don't know if she knows with this bag and badge. She's, I don't think she's familiar with this technology, but coming up technology that she is familiar with. Also, inside the bags are these small, like, pointers, penlight. but when you thumb the little bulb on it, you really can't see any reactions. So you kind of put those over. And a bag of Wothers.

Nice. Yeah. Count. Really? Yeah, I'm just looking for sponsorships. Oh, okay. By the way, Walk the Dinosaur by Was Not Was,

requested by Pridmore has shown up on the scroll. I like a Pridmore with a sneer. Not my favorite. Nottie throws the thumbs up. That song rules. Hugh also mentions that when you activate the vests with those badges, the fabric itself takes on almost like a protective armor kind of thing. It's very, it will, I mean, it's not going to stop a mortar or,

but it might deflect a blade. It might deflect bullets, something that might come in very handy when you guys start going on, on your missions. And so while you're looking at the, the bags. Again, there's a little lull in what's going on. So Hughes says, we'll let you look at your stuff and kind of share with each other. And we'll continue with our activities in just a few minutes. So what do you do? I look at everybody at my table and I say, hey, I got to say, this is starting to feel a little bit like a test, kind of maybe a little bit? Anybody else

kind of getting that vibe that then maybe we should be on our best? behavior right now? Oh, see, I was going to say cult. Oh, it's not, I look at Potts, the IT lead, and they're like, this isn't a, it's not a cult, right? Because I can't, that doesn't sound great. The Duke and Foundation is a charitable organization that's been working for a lot of years to make the world a better place. Cult is not actually accurate. Okay. I trust your, I trust your instincts. Potts says, listen, I, I, um, I understand where you're coming from, but no, it's not a cult, but we are true believers. Oh, oh, okay, then.

That is, I will point out, that is what cult say. That is what a cult would say. Oh, it's not. Yeah, very few cults are like, oh, yeah, it's a cult. Okay, we're a cult. We're a big-ass cult. Pots, is this a test, though? Because I want to, if it is, I want to do a good job, I just, I'm kind of nervous now.

Well, you know, I think that everything in life is a test. I mean, everything that you do, you're always being watched and you're always being checked out to how your response. Not in a judgmental way, but just, you know, these, even though we vetted you guys and screened you and interviewed you, you know, there's still, you know, a getting to know period. It's not just you getting to know each other. It's us getting to know you, too. So it's a test, it's one of, it's a test, I think, a little bit. All right, that's fine. I got this. Just then on the scroll on the screen says, The Dance by Garth Brooks, requested by Gray. Gray! Killing me. Gray loves country music, you guys.

At this point, a new person stands up. I will say also the dance is a beautiful song that transcends genre, so I think they're fun. And it is Garth Brooks. I mean, it's no thunder rolls, but it's all right. Colin Baton Rouge, are you kidding? Oh, wow. Crank that. So, Martine stands.

Justin goes up her requests Colin Baton Rouge by Garth Croix. I'm there. Purple roses of Cairozen. Justin is there. He crashed the party. Martine stands. Introduces herself as Martine.

She's ahead of security. And she overheard Remy asking Pots if this is a test. And she smiles. You can tell that she has a sense of humor about her. She says that we've designed a fun exercise so everybody can get to know each other. Yay! And she says, department heads, and all the department heads leave the tables. Just quick question, is this mandatory?

Yes, it is. Is it just the three of us in here? Are there like... No, the other operatives are at the other tables. There's like, what, nine others? Is that right? There are nine others. Okay.

Right. So as they're leaving through the one-outher, exit. There's only one exit. As they're leaving through the exit, Joe kind of looks back over his shoulder and says, see it tomorrow, you guys. As they leave, Martine gets ready to leave. And she says, here's how the test works. Egg spoon race. Fingers crossed, like hunch over egg spoon race, egg spoon race. God, I'll crush a fucking egg spoon race. You have one goal. And that's to leave across the floor. Room with the spoon, please. To leave the room. All you have to do, do is your tablemates and you have to leave the room in the correct order. And the doors left

open as they walk out. Hey everybody. This is Griffin McRoy. Well, I guess I'm just your best friend now because you're game player and best friend. Thank you for listening to The Adventure Zone. It's the first proper episode of the first sort of mini experimental arc that we're going to be doing as we transition into season two. And I'm so happy to be playing, and I'm so happy to see what my dad has made for us, and happy to be playing a new game fate and checking out this new genre. And we're all super, super excited, and we hope that you are as well. If you did not, you may want to go back and listen to the world-building episode we did a

couple weeks ago. If you are sort of lost about these characters in this world or how the game works, you can find all those explanations in the setup episode that we did for the last episode. But yeah, otherwise, I think it's pretty self-explanatory, and we'll be back in a couple weeks with another episode of Taz commitment. For right now, though, let's talk about some of our sponsors. This first Jumbotron, I want you to check out Death by Clicay by Bob Defendi, now on Amazon. And this is their copy. Or you'll make a kitten cry.

Seriously, what if you got against kittens, you monster? Nothing. There's small cats. They're really good. Big cats are good. Small cats are just perfect. Death by Cliche is about a game designer who is, whoa, shot in the head by a fan and ends up in the worst game of all time based on a true, a true story. It's a warm, fuzzy story of massive brain trauma, or it isn't.

The main character doesn't know for sure, and so neither do you. Really, it's one of the few bits of narrative integrity in the damn book. Well, let's not spoil that then. That's Death By Clchay by Bob Defendi, now on Amazon. Here's another one. This one is for the unorthodox tactic. crew and it's from Ben who says I want to thank the best D&D group I've ever had the honor of DMing for so that everyone knows you're the best thank you Chris Joe Stewart cat Eric Nat

Mike noel Tom and Kate editors note holy shit that's a big D&D group how do you manage all these clowns at the same time Ben just running amuck all over your plans anyway that group of people who introduced me to this crazy show in the first place for which I am very grateful. You are all excellent players, role players, and most importantly, friends. I, he said friends. I made it friends. I don't know why I did that. I usually hate that. Hey, thank you for tweeting about the show using the Zonecast hashtag. We sure do appreciate it, and we appreciate you spreading the word as we sort of work through these experimental arcs. We always worry whenever we try new things in our podcasts about, you know, listeners dropping off.

So anything you can do to help us spread the word, we don't pay to advertise the show at all. And so we entirely rely on word of mouth for how we grow. And we are so appreciative of everybody who's shared the show and said nice things and left nice iTunes reviews. It really, really means a lot to us. I don't think I have anything else really to say here. Nashville, we're coming for you. Sunday we'll have a new live episode up that I'm very excited. I've been planning for a little while now.

and we'll probably put that up between these experimental arcs. And I'm very much looking forward to that. But yeah, until then, enjoy the rest of the episode, and we will be back with a new episode of Taz's commitment on November 2nd. I can't believe how fast this year is moving. Times a flat circle. See you later. Just then, scroll at the bottom of the screen,

says, West Palm Beach, Florida by Coldplay. Oh, God, we got to get out of this fucking room. Requested by Blank. Well, I don't see any eggs or spoons, so I think that we should probably try to figure out this puzzle. So is it the three of, it's like three people at each table? Is that what's happening? Yeah, three people at each table.

Yeah. Let me tell you who's at the tables. Table two, you guys are table one, even though you're in the bottom right hand corner. At table two are Gray, Flanagan, and Addison At table three, Sylvain, Liddy, and Jamie And at four, Pridmore, Dagney, and Abbey First of all, Coldplay doesn't have a song I'm, this is Remy, Colby doesn't have a song

called West Palm Beach, and I'm not proud that I know Enough about Coldplay. Okay, yeah, that's, I mean, I'm more familiar with their older hits Like Garden State soundtrack, you're a shit, but I'm pretty sure I've never heard a cold play song called West Palm Beach. Am I getting cell service in here? No. There's no cell service there.

I try to get up my cell phone to like fact check that, but. Is anybody here, is anybody here? Oh, yeah, Irene's sort of yelling as much as she does. Is anybody here from West Palm Beach out of curiosity? Nope. I'm not. Nope. Okay, first, did anybody here request the song, West Palm Beach?

Palm Beach, Florida by Coldplay. I would never request a Coldplay song. I know we just met, but you should know that about me. Okay. Anybody? Did anybody request this song? It said West Palm Beach, Florida, by Coldplay, requested by, and there was blank. Yeah, I think, Nadia is just trying to make sure before we move on to any sort of other investigation.

West Palm Beach. All right, we have to leave this room in a certain order. I think we need to investigate some, either the jukebox of the door or something. because I don't think we have enough information to solve this right now. Okay, yeah. What are you going to investigate? I am going to investigate. No, Charles, you're making dice noises.

Are you going to do... Oh, yeah, we got the thing and the thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I wanted to have... Maybe there are people who only listen to the show to get, like, Dice Sounded ASMR, Justin. You don't know. They can edit it in their own. Okay.

I want to investigate the high-tech jukebox. How about that? Go for it. That's not good? No, that ain't great, but I have plus three. And Travis rolled a negative one. We do need to say these things. Yeah, I roll the negative one plus three is a two.

Okay, when you go over to the high-tech jukebox, you notice that the song West Palm Beach, Florida by Coldplay, is not in its database. Because it doesn't exist. And what are we hearing? Like, are we hearing, like, an original Coldplay composition that they wrote specifically for this test? It's just kind of a generic song that would sound kind of like a... You're describing a cold play song. Okay, okay, okay. So that's it.

It's some kind of cold play-ish music. I want to roll notice just for the room, just to see, like a... This is basically perception check, right? So this will be like... Okay. Jesus Christ, that's zero. Everything looks good to me. I'm still looking for spoons and eggs over here, so...

But I, you know what? Even a zero, I think. I will give you one. Okay. You notice that at table two, Addison is really taking a long, hard look at the pinlight pointer in his hand. Okay. Addison, did you figure something out?

I don't know if we're supposed to be sharing information right now, but what's up with your pin? I'm not really that open to sharing the information with you, but, you know, the fact that they would give us a light. And if you look at the little bulb thing, it does light up. It just doesn't shoot a beam of light that I can see. Uh, Irene takes out her pin light. She's got, it's the inverse of Cardala. So her, uh, investigation is a plus two. And let me get that quick roll going. Uh, it would love a good roll. Nope. Still now. It's a zero. So it's a two, though, which in the ladder of fate is fair.

She takes out her penlight and does a notice check around the room just to see if the light coming out of it sort of has any effect anywhere in the room. And you notice that when you just kind of flash it around the room, it seems like there was a flash when you pointed it at Nadia. Weird. Okay, I pointed at her again. I try, I try, I am now also tricordering Nadia with my pen just to see if it also flashes. And I'm kind of scanning myself with it. That's, that's good.

Okay. Palm, at the palm. Yeah, you're gonna shoot it at her beach. I mean, her, shoot out her West Palm. Your left hand palm, I guess? You shoot it at her palm and you see the number 582. All right, so she has to leave the room

580 second. But when you shine it on your own palms, nothing. Just then, the scroll, the scroll on the bottom of the screen says, Walking on Sunshine, and it starts playing. Irene checks her feet with the light. Nothing. I check my feet with the light? Nope.

I'm sorry, Nadia. I think it's just you got stuff written all. Do you remember somebody writing 582 on your hand? Man, I don't know. All right. helpful. Nadia checks her feet, I guess. Nothing. Okay. Now you've got, remember, there are three of you, and there are three other tables. Addison, did you, have you figured anything else out? Because I would, I would really love the help. And I want to make sure that we can all sort of work together as a team.

That's really important to me. So maybe if you kind of share something, then I can, I can share something. And I'm going to use a number. We got a number. It's got three digits. So that's three, basically. I'm going to use empathy to try to convince him. Well, that would be rapport probably, right? Empathy is like trying to tell somebody's lying to you or figuring out their emotional state. Okay, yes, rapport, which she has a plus three on rapport. Hell yeah.

Oh, hell yeah. That's a three. Oh, really good. That's a three plus three. So six, which in the fate system, is fantastic. That's fantastic. Well, yeah, let me tell you. I feel like I've known you my whole life.

Yeah. You're friendly. And, you know, I like everybody. I try to get along with just about everybody. And hey, great googamuga. You are the one of the nicest people this party. So let me tell you this. We got one.

We saw you guys shine on the palms. So we shine it on our palms. And Flanagan, Flanagan was the only one that had a marking on her hand on our palms. it was a zero. Hmm. Okay, wait. So everybody at the tables, raise your hand if somebody at your table had something written on their hand when you shined the pinlight on it.

And if you haven't tried it yet, try it now. And table three starts to respond, but Jamie at table three makes them stop. And Jamie says, to intimidate the shit out of Jamie. Guys, don't, don't tell us. them anything. Don't tell them anything. This is a competition and I want to win it. I get two. Well, so I rolled equal to zero plus two for intimidate to intimidate Jamie. Okay. Okay. The state system, two is fair. So Jamie says, why in the world would we want to help you beat us, fucker? Whoa. I don't like you hear my dad say that. James.

Yeah. Your dad didn't. Jamie did. I look at it. I look at it. And she reaches out and gives you a shove. Whoa. Hey, Irene, you're in HR, right? You're seeing all this, just checking. I got this. Yeah. Jamie, I would like you to look around this room, right? See everybody. Look everybody in the eyeballs. All of you together do not equal my mind. So you can either have. Help me now, and I will help you in the future, or I will work and use every bit of my mind to ruin your time here.

That works. Oh, by the way, the whole time this conversation is happening, fucking walking on sunshine is playing, and that is so good to me. That's a very good scene that's happening right now. Jamie holds up her palm. You shine your light on her palm, and it says 4, 6, 7. Okay, so these are all distinct numbers. Can I check the jukebox and see if somebody requested walking on sunshine? You sure can.

Martine did. Martin's not here, though, right? That's right. Hmm. Oh, wait. We're still missing one number, right? It's four tables of three people. Four table.

So the information, the information to be, let me be fair, the information that came up when you checked the jukebox said, walking on sunshine by blank requested by martin it's katrina and the waves don't ask how nadia knows that um we all know a lot of things that we shouldn't yeah we walk over to the other table or i walk over to the other table and say uh do you want of you have numbers on your palm that shows up when you shine the light on it we have some and we're happy to share it maybe we can work work together i watch a lot of survivor and that seems to help when you you know cooperate with the enemy a little bit. So what do you say? Pridmore speaks up and Pridmore says, listen, I really need this job. Hell yeah. I really need to do well here. And anything I can do to curry favor with the people here

in the fellowship I'm going to do. So it just doesn't seem like to make a lot of sense to me to give up our information quite so easily. What can you offer me? I reached it in my wallet. I have like $13 of a library card, GameStop membership. Wait, hold on, hold on just one little second. Is that an Olive Garden card in there? Yeah, it's not the pasta pass,

but I think it has like $12 on it. That's probably enough for some Fettuccini. What do you say? I tell you what, give me the cash and give me the card. We'll share our number with you. Really cleaning me out here. Of course I hand it over. It's nothing.

Okay. Well, it's garbage. She loves pasta. Okay. Okay, sure, Mabby. So Abby, it's Abby like Downton Abbey. Okay. Abby holds up his hand, you shine the light on it, and it's 602.

What? Oh, okay, wait a minute. Whoa, whoa, blah, blah, but. This is nothing. Never mind. Are the numbers on, are the numbers, are the songs of the jukebox numbered? No. Damn, that would have been dope.

Just in. the scroll on the middle screen shows, Color My World by Chicago, requested by Jonesy. All right, we're getting back on track. All right, Jonesy's the engineering head. Pridmore, does this song have any sort of significance to you or Jonesy? It doesn't make any sense to me.

Okay. I love the song. No, Chicago's a great thing. Color my world. She's fucking belted. Oh, the map. The map with all the different colored coded areas on it, right? Maybe that's anything.

Shine your light on that. Maybe something will happen. Yeah, I shine my light on the map of the Berg. When you shine your light on the map of the Berg, all of a sudden it goes back to the main section. It goes back to the main map showing all of the different departments. and the colors, as I said, are color-coded, and each department has their own color. Cool.

What is, can you tell us IT, Humanities, and R&D color? Sure, IT's color is amethyst, which is a blue violet. Okay. R&D's color is yellow, which is 582. and Humanities is Violet 403. Was there a number for Amethyst? You didn't tell us that. Amethyst is 439.

Okay, so we have some number, we have 582, right? And that was, was that the number that we started with? Yeah, so I'm 582. Wait, why do the colors have numbers? Yeah, we're... Okay, you're telling us information. All of a sudden, walking on sunshine plays again. Okay.

Okay. But wait, wait, wait. You're telling us, okay. It's the wavelengths of the visible spectrum. That's what the colors are. So zero is black. Okay. And then as we go through, it's violet is 380 or, yeah, 380 to 450.

Blue is 450 to 495. Green is 495 to 570. All of a sudden, table two stands up and starts moving towards the door. Well, stop, stop, stop. Don't, don't, fuck it. Let's just go, let's just go in order. Me, uh, Yep, go.

Me, Remy and Gray Flannigan and Addison break into a run. Yeah, we're running too. Can I roll athletics? I'm super fast. But you can't get first. I have to go first. I know. Well, you're closer to the door.

Okay, we're running. All right. We sprint through it. Irene, me, Nadia. You have solved the color puzzle. Yay! Yay! I do a flip through the door as I go.

because that's how I, who I am. And Nadia flips off the other team. As you come out, Joe and Potts and Grace are there. And Joe says, I knew you guys would be the first three to do it. I knew you'd win. Joe, shut up. Thank you, Joe. That means a lot.

Irene turns to people coming through the door now. Hey, guys, that was so much fun. Thank you. We'll get them next time. We just barely made it. Wasn't that fun, though? It seemed really fun. and Sylvain just looks at you like he could stab you in the head.

Your vest won't protect against that, so be careful. Potts says, all right, listen, you guys, that was awesome. We're very proud of you, but as you know, you have a very big day tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day we do the augmentation. So go to your rooms. Whoa. I don't see pots on my guest list. What does Potts do?

He's IT head. He's my potts. Oh, Potts. That's Remy's boss. Hey, Potts, can you back up and start over and particularly focus on sort of the augmentation part of it this time around? Am I going to get a third, maybe a fourth leg? What are we talking about? Blasters in the chat.

What are you, what are you talking about, man? You know what? You guys have had a lot thrown at you today. Bright and early tomorrow morning. You can't just mention body augmentation and then. walk it back, Potts. Well, we'll tell you about it in the morning. We'll have a big debriefing tomorrow morning, big breakfast debriefing.

So be thinking about what you want to eat. And we'll talk about it. And we'll give you the waivers. This is totally your choice. We'll talk about it in the morning. So it's not a cult. Wait, it's not a cult? I don't think it's a cult.

I think we're probably good on that front. Is it pots, on the scale of ear piercing, to second head attachment. Where are we landing vis-a-vis augmentations? I hate to get hung up on this. Let's say 75% more towards the head thing. Oh, my God. But I'm telling you, it is going to transform your life.

It is absolutely amazing what's going to happen to you. Okay, so just one last time. Not a cult. Not a cult. Okay. It might be cult-ish. All right, cult adjacent. One last question.

Can we go back in the room now that we've solved the test? Yeah. Are you still hungry? I go get my pyramid of burgers. I'm going to finish these in my room. I'll see you guys tomorrow. All right, get some sleep. I'm not going to be sleeping great after eating 20 sliders, but we'll see about that.

Okay. Next morning rolls around. You go to one of the private dining rooms in the section. As a matter of fact, each one of the wings has their own. private dining room, and for right now, you're in humanities. Remember, humanity in the Do Good Fellowship also includes medical. So your three department heads are actually all three there. You sit down at a table to give you chairs this time, and you're having a breakfast.

And so Joe and Potts and Grace are talking to you. And Joe starts off because he's the head of R&D. He says, I know you folks have a lot of questions about the process. And I want to tell you about it. It's called the stem plant process. Stim plants are these very tiny molecular bonds that we introduce into your system. And the stem plants automatically go to places in your body to emphasize whether it's mental, whether it's physical, whatever. it is that act as little tiny bioorganic enhancers.

The process, we have a really good idea how it works. And ironically, it's based on research that Nadia here has done. Nadia, tell them a little bit about the research that you do with the artificial skin. Yeah. So basically what I've created is a kind of smart biopolymer. It acts where you would normally need skin from a donor. It acts as both the skin and a bandage. It mimics human skin. It grows. It changes. It heals. And over time, bonds with the person who receives it and becomes part of their body. body. It's basically amazing and a miracle, and I did it, and you're all welcome. I, Remy raises his hand and weights. Yes, yeah, Remy. I think I'm good on skin. I appreciate the offer, but, like, I have plenty of skin already, and I don't need extra skin. Where would it go, even, I guess, is my first question. On top of the skin that's already there, would it just kind of dangle off?

because that's... And this is where Grace steps in, and she says, the technology that we use almost introduces you into a cocoon that sort of covers your entire body. Skin cocoon? And it... Well, now wait. You emerge from the cocoon after the stem plants are injected to you.

So that's, you're not going to have extra skin hanging off of you, like a big goiter or something. it's just the way that we get the stem plants into your system. There's no pain involved whatsoever. Can we please stop talking about my miracle creation like it's a gross skin thing? No, it's like silly putty. It's good skin. It's like plastic or silly putty or some kind of, it's not skin.

Yeah, I guess I'm confused. Are we talking about steroids here? because I don't think I want to do that. I don't want to get DQed from the next qualifier. It's not standardized, right? The POTS, the POTS says, well, I got to tell you, you are going to be permanently changed. This is not a reversible process, and that's why we have to make sure that all three of you want to go through this process. There's something else you need to know about the process.

Once it's established with these stem plants, and once you're established, you three have gained these abilities. These abilities only work in these three parts. In other words, the three of you have to be within a hundred yards of each other for these abilities to function. Is that mandatory? I think I'm going to be telling you that everything's mandatory from this point on. In other words, you three have to function within that proximity to each other for your abilities to work. I'm actually going to do a, what's it called when you make yourself do something? Compel? Yeah, I'm going to do a compel of myself.

One of my aspects is Remy needs to be pushed. And I'm going to do that now and turn to Remy and say, don't be a coward. There's no jumps in technology without risk. and Nadia rolls up her sleeves and shows a patch of this smart polymer that she tested on herself, when I couldn't get approval to test this on humans, I did it myself, and now I'm in the running for the Nobel Prize. So don't be scared and try it. I'm not scared. I mean, you earlier, I think someone said the term skin cocoon, and that's going to be sort of rattling around my cage for a while.

but I just to be, I need to clarify something real quick. Hey, Potts. Mm-hmm. Are you about to give us superpowers? Remy. Irene. Nadia. We are about to make you gods.

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