The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Commitment - Episode 2

Episode Date: November 2, 2017

Our heroes are empowered by a somewhat gross and dangerous scientific process, and are dispatched on their first mission. Remy tries to keep the peace. Nadiya picks her favorite movie. Kardala breaks free. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

Roy, your DM, your GM, which is it? GM. GM. I'm your M. And this is... You're just my master? That's no good. I am the master.

Are you ready to play? You ready to jump in? Hell yeah, I am, Dad. I'm clipping, though. So let me fix that. He's not ready to play, because he's clipped. Okay, now I'm not clipping, and I'm ready to play. I was thinking about, and we've never done this before, but I was thinking about

we should start this episode like this. Wait, you're going to make us gods? Right? So then it like picks up. Yeah, it picks right up. People love that shit. And I never done that. Okay. I'm going to work real hard, by the way, to try to come up with a character voice. We're going to see how I do. Okay. I actually, this is like a really super weird coincidence, but I looked it up and I did a lot of research on it. And it turns out that Remy sounds exactly like I do. It's like really very, very strange. It's just so difficult to tell when it's you and when it's Remy. Well, if I talk about jumping very high over.

For being on Ninja Warrior, you can assume that that is me embodying Remy in that moment. That's fine. I've never been on Ninja Warrior, and my jumps are pathetic. And if you talk about spilling coffee on your computer, we'll know it's you, Griffin. Oh, my God, it's everywhere. It got in every hole, every crack, every plug, every crevice. But tell us about what got on the computer. Okay.

So let's do like a smash cut, okay? I'll just kick it off. Okay, smash cut. You're going to make us Todd's? No, gods. Gods. With a capital G. That's good.

I'm not sure if I want to be a god, but I definitely don't want to be a Todd. This is really not a metaphysical discussion. It's more long lines of abilities and powers. You are speaking florally. Like, you're going to make us super powerful. Not that you're going to make us live on big mountain in the sky. or maybe down under the earth or... I mean, you could have just said that.

It was a cool way to button up the conversation, I think. I mean, yes. And it obviously failed. Well, I mean, listen, it made an impact. We're talking about it, aren't we? But maybe next time just say, I'm going to perform experiments on you to try to make you more powerful than you are.

It's not a very good end of a podcast episode, though, to be honest. Well, no, listen, yeah, we all know. Remy, Remy stands there kind of quietly and contemplatively for a while, and he says, all right, uh, heat vision then, I guess. Yeah, heat vision for me too. Do we, do we get to pick because I would like to be invisible, please? Uh, no, not really.

Uh, it's kind of a crapshoot. We haven't done this too many times. It, it'll all make sense to you. Tomorrow morning. Doodle, doodoo, doodoo, dole, dole, dole, dole, dole, dole. Didn't we just go to... It's tomorrow morning. Okay.

You are in the medical wing of the humanities division. Well, are we? Because according to the World 20 map I'm looking at, we are trapped in some kind of demonic hellscape. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Dad is... I'm looking at this map, and again, Justin's going to post hopefully all these to the Twitter. I don't even think I could get how good it is in a screenshot.

I think Dad might be... Can you zoom out so you can get like the fulls? Yeah, yeah. There's a... Oh, there we go. Okay. So capture the whole thing. Because it's important because these are clues because I think our dad's the fucking

Zodiac killer. Uh-huh. I need to make, okay, I can't make the little icons smaller. I'll try to get as much of the good stuff as I can because it's like, it's all so buckwild. There's some, I think, objects from Half-Life in here. There's a... My favorite is to really sell the... It's a science room.

There's just a periodic table of... elements. I like, that's a character. Oh. That's character. It's me, Pyrdi. It's Tableau. Joe, your buddy Joe, remember?

My name is Joe. I'm a periodic table of elements that came to life. He's a scientist. Which passed me, I'd trap me in this table of the element. If a periodic table of elements did come to life, it would be a scientist. I think we could all agree on that. I want to teach you kids all about the noble gases. All right, so sorry.

So you step into the installation installation. This room is bisected into two halves with by a large thick, transparent wall. On the left side is like a big pumping device. And Grace is standing there prepping that machine. On the right side are these large tanks, Joe or the periodical table, is standing there prepping it. In the middle of the wall is a large, impressive-looking metallic door.

But the room that you're in, when you first walk in, is kind of dominated. There's a circular table right in the middle of the room on this half of the room. And is that also a character? Are all tables characters?

No, no. But the computer bank standing there is pots. Okay. Your iconography, the rules of it They're so, I don't know what is object and what is person, but I love it. Well, Potts is over IT. I gotcha, I got you. No, he's a computer.

I would know that keyboard anywhere. So as you step in, Joe greet you. All right. Hey guys, welcome to the big day. How's everybody feeling? A little nervous, if I'm going to be honest. Yeah, I mean, not me too, not about the science, but that I'll get, you know, a lame power. like, you know, getting real small or, you know, super tasting or something like that.

I'm fine. Well, that's good, dear. Okay, so first thing you do is take off your robes and hang them on those pegs over there and we'll get started. Now, it's totally up to you guys. You can either be naked under the robes or you can have on like little speedo things. Okay. I'm going to go with not-naked. Yeah, I'll not naked.

Thank you very much. Kind of a weird vibe that you've just told us to dress to our comfort. Dad. Yeah. Still your sons. I know you're having fun and you're in your fantasy world, but it's just like the spa. Dressed down to your own comfort. Except not.

It's like if you walked into work and the boss was like, okay, cool. Do you want to be naked or what? Yeah, I'll just wear my underwear. Thank you. Yeah. Okay. So they open the great big impressive metallic hatch and you step into the other half of the room. This is a very impressive metallic hatch.

It's from IKEA. We love our big metallic hatches here on the Adventure Zone. Over on the left side, there are machines on the corresponding sides of the big clear wall. There's some intake fans and what else? Outgiv fans? What's the output of intake? Outtake? Outtake fans in front of the big pumping thing on the other side of the wall.

No, outtake fans are the people who watch America's Funniest Home Videos. Woof. Yates. And there are great big cylinders on the other side of the machine where Joe had been. But the room is dominated by three pads, three circular pads on the floor that look like they're covered with kind of mesh, a very fine mesh. And over each one of those pads is an array of metallic arms with a nozzle at the end of each one. And that is directly over those pads.

Grace hands you a kind of skull cap thing to place over your heads. and there are earbuds in the skull cap. Also, a pair of goggles each and a respirator with a built-in microphone. I ask Grace, so is it like standard protocol? Like we have to get a spray tan before we get the superpowers? It's very similar. I think you're going to find it a very pleasurable experience, actually. Weird.

You've modeled the superpower injection process after spray tanning, like we're on toddlers and tiaras, just making sure this is good science. It's exactly good science. Trust me. It's very good science. When you're ready, when you've got the skull caps on, the goggles on the respirator, step up on those pads.

Nadia's already done. Nadia's already on there. Remney, you're on the pad on the left. Nadia, you're on the pad on the right. Irene, you're on the pad in the middle. Okay. Do the pads correspond a different super?

power is because is there a heat vision pad? There is not specifically a heat vision pad. Okay. But they are calibrated to your own individual biology. So I'm afraid it is that order. Cool. Let's go. Let's go.

I got work to do. Come on. All right. Now we're going to need a minute or two to calibrate. So why don't you three just take a moment to gather your thoughts? maybe share a little bit, talk to each other, and we'll get started here in just a minute. And then Grace steps through the metal portal

and closes it behind her. Okay, everybody. Top movie. Is that good? Top movie? Like, my favorite movie? Like, number one. Nadia points to the headphones

and the respirator and kind of shrugs like, sorry. Nadia. Nadia? Favorite movie? Points of the headphones. All right. I'm going to pick a movie for Nadia.

Let's see. Oh, Flubber. Flubber. She loves science. Flubber. Nadia's eyes narrow. It's your favorite movie Flubber, Nadia? It's probably Flubber.

It's probably Flubber. Or the nutty professor to the clumps. Nadia, don't say anything. It's Flubber or the Nutty Professor to the Clumps. Just stay completely silent. Nadia's kind of shaking. Okay, all right. So she picked Nutty Professor to the Clumps.

It's the fly. It's the fly. Oh, shit. The fly. What about you? It's actually Flubber, which is weird. That is so strange. It's just a lot of fun, and, you know, there's a lot of very high jumping.

I was a kid, and I watched, you know, Rob Williams jump real high with the flubber on his shoes. And I was like, hey, that's. That looks pretty good. It was actually what inspired me to become a, you know, a good jumper. So I owe a lot to that film. What about you, Irene? We're all Tannenbaum's Natch. Okay.

Yeah, that's one of the better ones. Of the movies, you mean? Yeah. Yeah, of the movies, I think it's probably one of the better ones. Okay, your earbuds crackle and you hear the voice shots. Okay, gang, we're getting ready. Now, let me just explain to you what's going to happen so you don't completely freak out. moderate freaking out is okay.

Those nozzles up above you are going to spray what we call skinthetic, which is a version of Nadia's artificial skin. Okay. See you in court? Go on. No, actually, it was part of your agreement if you noticed. You signed it away. And it will spray the skinthetic in an aerosol form, and it will cover you and harden. Space Cadet used to call them your golems

Because they sort of make you look like Kind of rough carved And then Joe's voice cuts in and says Not now We need to hear from them You need to keep the chatter off the line You did say just real quick That it wasn't going to be a specifically

Not going to be a skin cocoon Situation and it sounds like maybe you're going back on that deal, maybe you've changed your mind about some stuff. Oh, it's a skin cocoon. Okay, fantastic. We just, we talked it over with HR, and Irene and her cohorts agreed that it was better

that you not just completely wig out. It's all about branding, you know what I mean? Sure. You're not going to call it skin cocoon, cause scintetics or whatever. Just go the scintetics starts to spray out of the nozzles. I'm a hungry little caterpillar, let's do it. And it's covered you all.

And so Potts says, all right, everybody doing okay? Tell me what's going through your heads while this is happening. I'm just thinking of all the work I'm going to do as like super smart, some kind of like mega scientist, I guess. I, this is super yucky. And also, my eyes don't feel hot at all. And I'm pretty bummed about that. Irene, I'm really scared. Okay, well, you're doing fine.

Just keep breathing in your respirator. Just keep talking to me. And you'll probably notice some changes in the consistency. You've got your arms extended. You look just like Sam in Quantum Leap. Your arms are extended to give the scintetic total access. Is the scintetic supposed to smell like cinnamon roll or? No, that's your own breath coming through the respirator.

Yeah. I did have cinnamon rolls. Breakfast mystery solved. I have an itch on my tummy. I can't do nothing about it. Please. Please. Can someone get in here and help me out?

So the golems around you have hardened, and it's just kind of a waiting game. Again, Potts chimes in. All right. Tell me how you're feeling. Irene, are you still nervous? Yeah. Okay. Well, what's going to happen is?

What exactly in the past? five minutes do you think would have dispelled my fears? Well, it's about to get worse. At this point, we activate the pumps. When they activate the pumps, the stem plants fill the chamber in the air and are immediately attracted to your golems and start working their way into the actual skinthetics and think of it as like a medium. The stem plants into... Could I have a large bodies? I'll give you a broad shoulders, you know. So you really don't feel anything. Maybe a little bit of a tingle, but that's...

I mean, my tummy hitch situation is very serious and very immediate. I feel a little bit of a tingle. Is that normal? Just a little bit of one? Just a little bit of the tingle. Yeah, just a little... I'm getting some ASMR. Is that normal?

Yes. All right. So it... There's a different time frame for... everybody. As we watch from the control room, we can see seams starting to appear in Remy's Golem and large chunks of it just start sloughing off and falling to the ground. And when that happens, when that happens, the nozzle array over Remy withdraws and raises up into the ceiling. I fall to my knees

because I imagine that was pretty exhausting and disorienting. I just kind of stay there on my knees for a little bit and then I look up and with both hands I touch my temples and I open my eyes wide and just yell and

you start making that sound? Yes. Yeah, no powers have manifested for Remy. Which is not that unusual because as you know, it's a three-part system. Okay.

All of a sudden, places start appearing on Irene's golem. They look like sparks, but they're moving around on the surface of the golem. And when that happens, Irene's nozzle array starts to withdraw, like Remice did. But when they move, the sparks move to the top of the golem's head and point at the nozzle array. And there's a pulse and this surge of electricity, an arc of electricity, shoots up and hits the nozzle array. Oh, shit.

And when that happens, all the lights flicker. But come back on. And Pot says, Irene, talk to me. What's going on in there? I don't know. I feel strange. The sparks are moving around. around. This time, they are facing Remy. They all come together into that one spot. And when that

happens, at the same time, Remy, you feel that tingling sensation give like a huge surge all through your body. Yeah, I'm going to fucking somersault right out of the way. And just then the sparks on the body pulse right in front of you. Roll athletics. Yeah, for sure. I mean, that is zero, but I have a plus five athletics, and I also, do I have superpowers now? You have superpowers now. Well, then I also have uncanny dodge. If you see a project outcome and you can get out of the way with clever gymnastics, you gain plus two to defense rolls when dodging range attacks. So that's seven.

All right. Describe the leap. I think it's almost like he doesn't realize what he's doing, because, I mean, he doesn't know that he has superpowers. So I think he just like his body, he moves it in a way where he thinks he's just kind of moving to the right a little bit. But he actually like plants a hand on the ground and jumps 10 feet into the air off the handspring and lands like flawlessly and looks at his, looks at his hands and his feet and looks up at pots on the other side of the glass like, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh. All right. And the arc of electricity hits the pad where you had been standing. The lights flicker again, but come back on. Irene, I don't know if you can hear me. You need to chill in there, maybe. Grace speaks in your earbuds and says Nadia's vitals are all over the place. And Nadia's golem has started to shift and move without.

any seams. And Joe says, ah, that's new. But when Nadia's golem starts to move, the sparks shift towards the side where Nadia is. Jesus.

And Joe says in the earbuds, Nadia, your golems move, and it's very important that it not move. And Pot says, Remy, we can't open the hatch to help you until the filaments are pumped out of the room. What do you do? Does it look like electricity is about to shoot at, because you said it was the electricity was forming on Irene about to hit Nadia?

It was Amy, yeah. When Nadia's golem started to move, the sparks moved in that direction. I mean, I can either go look at those fans or I can try to help Nadia or Irene out, right? Your call. It's an RPG. Yeah. So they're both still in their golems, right? They're both still. They are still in their golems. I ask, can I, can I, can I move Irene? Can I try to get this lightning from stop blasting all over the, around the room? I don't know if I would move her. It's still in the process.

Until she comes out of the golem, it would be extremely dangerous. Okay, I want to try to talk to Irene to get her to calm down or, like, gain some control over this thing. I don't know if that would be empathy or rapport, but if I can't move her, it feels like this is, this is the thing I can do to stop this situation from, escalating right now. Okay. Is Nadia still responsive and hearing and everything? No, Nadia, you guys are in communication. I say, Nadia, you got to help me calm Irene down, and all she's going to fry both of us.

I'm a little distracted, if I'm going to be honest. There's a lot going on right now, but I will do what I can. In the meantime, you could maybe draw her fire. Oh, yeah, it seems like it's attracted to movement. I can do that. I run over just towards Irene and start, I don't know. I do a flip right in front of Irene trying to move around more than Nadia is to try to attract the fire. The spark shift to the other side and there's a pulse and another arc of electricity starts to head your way.

I roll out of the way of it. All right? That's a fucking 10. Excellent. Yeah, you roll so good, you become Sonic the Hedgehog. Yeah, I literally, I literally go supersonic with that one. The lightning arc instead hits the wall, and this time, the lights flicker and go out. Oh, my God.

And Potts says, Irene? Irene. In the darkness, you hear that sloughing sound again, and the lights come back up. up, Justin? What do we see? Finally. I demand meat. Who are you? My name is Cardala, little man, and I have been freed from the Irene prison, and I demand meat. Does anybody, can you, two things, can, I don't have any meat. I'm basically nude right now, but also, please stop shooting lightning at all of us. Oh, of course.

Potts's voice kicks in. Remy, the filaments are almost cleared and security is on the way. But if anything happens to Nadia while she's still in Golan form... Irene rips out her earpieces. Or sorry, Cardala rips out her earpieces. No way.

Remy, we can't let her harm Nadia in any way, shape, or form until she comes out of the golem. It would be fatal. Little man, you will direct me to me to meet or you will be meat or you will, is this your prison? Have you created this prison for me? No, we were doing a ritual to summon you to our work. I don't know, that's a bad lie. I don't know what's

going on, but this isn't a prison. We're going to get out of here in just a second. We just need to be patient for like a minute. I understand you are afraid of the demon. I too have been shook to my core. Ah, just kidding, little man, I am not afraid. Shall I destroy it for you? No. And Irene starts, uh, Cardala starts to walk over to, uh, smash, uh, Nadia. I, I run between them. No, no, no, no, no, not a demon. Everything's good. Uh, that's my... Look at it. Yeah. No, it's, it's, the skin all over and it's moving around and stretching around all weird. And that's, but that's, I think, normal. And we are super good here. And I, I, I have jerky, you know, jerky, like, it's like old meat. It's good as hell, though. I have a lot of that back of my

dorm, so I'll swing by and get you some of that here in like five minutes tops. I am famished for I cannot count the days. I have watched the world through the prison of Irene Baker, and now I am finally free, and I wish nothing more than to dine on flesh. Flash, but I can be patient. Good. On the other side of the wall. back in the control room, Martine and Sylvain enter the monitor chamber with weapons drawn.

Okay. Martin says, open the hatch, Potsie. And Pots refuses. Pottsy, I would listen to them. Open the hatch. This match. Don't do that, not tell Nadia's awake.

Nadia, can you hear me? Can you like finish molting or whatever? Who is Nadia? Where is she? She's the demon one you thought she was. You hear Joe in your earbuds. Nadia, listen to me. For some reason, the skinthetic seemed to be reacting with your body.

You are not going to be able to reject the scintetic. It will not sluff off. It seemed to be reacting to your arm for some reason. Oh, yeah, I have the skin graft. This is unexpected. Give me a second. I would like to roll Will. Okay.

Oh, wait. I have a program that does that. Not great, but a two. So, fair. I'm going to, because, okay, so here's why I'm doing this. What Nadia knows about her creation, the bioskin, the scintetic, as you're calling it, is that it reacts to your body, and it becomes part of your body. So if this is doing a skin, if it's attacked to the skin graft that she already has,

she is trying to somehow, you know, make it become part, work with her body instead of against it. Okay, I like that. Your body starts to actually absorb the scintetic. Over on the other side of the wall, Martin instructs Sylvain. And Sylvain goes over and restrains pots. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, come on. Pulls pots away. Pulls pots away from a control room.

And Martine starts punching buttons to open the hatch. Give me just one more minute. I think I've almost got it. Joe says, you and your fella do not run things here, Martin. Three department heads here say give them time. And Martin says, I'll give you one minute. I'm the one department head with a gun. You're gonna shoot everybody

You ding-dong Nadia You need to roll I say roll will again To see if you can stabilize I'm gonna roll science Okay Eat that skin

Oh wait I have a program Why do you just forgot it Within the span of like 90 seconds I rolled three Three pluses and a blank Oh it's not in the pro Why we're using the program

Specifically for Travis But I rolled three pluses And a blank Plus four So seven Okay. Do these guys have guns drawn on Cardala? On the other side of the hatch?

Yeah. Uh-oh. They're through the glass, right? Well, that's why she wants to open the hatch. They couldn't shoot through the glass. Can I see that, is it like a transparent situation, or I can see? It is transparent. Okay, Cardala walks up and smashes the, punches the glass as hard as she can with her fist.

Okay. Sorry, it's just like, it is untenable that they would have guns drawn on her. Okay. Okay. It's a negative one, and I guess this would be... Physique, or... Fizique? Or fight?

Or fight? Physique is like feats of strength. I don't think it's fine. I think it'd be physique. Physique? Okay. So three minus one. So a two, which, according to the fate ladder, is fair.

Fair. Okay. The transparent one. wall splinters, spider webs. At that point, the hatch pops open and Martin says, okay. Looks like everything's okay. Everybody's fine. Everybody's stabilized. Great. She holsters her weapon. Struck Sylvain, he holsters his weapon. She says, terrific. All right, you guys. Patch them up, feed them, get them outfitted. Wait, you can't just come in here and point Point guns at everybody and then be cool about it.

I demand battle. It's coming. Trust me. But not now. We need to get you skimming and in the air in one hour. I am going to like a cinder block punch Martine with my new giant polymer fist. And that would be a five. All right.

That hits her. Hits her. Yes. Doesn't hurt her. This demon craves battle. I like this demon. And she sprawls on the floor. Sylvain draws down on you. Sorry about that. I was just really angry. And, huh, I see, interesting. Wasn't expecting that at all. Huh.

You could turn your body into a rock like the Kirby power? Apparently. Do another rock. Do a different, can be a... Uh, yeah, let me see. Hold on. Uh, name a weapon. Uh, two swords. Okay? Spear. I'll do the two swords first. I'll do a spear first, because she gets angry real fast.

Okay, spear. Let's see. We'll put two, so six, form a spear with one hand. Um, shield maybe. So that's, uh, eight to form a shield. with the other hand. Huh. Interesting. Oh, yes. I help, help Martina up. Sorry. And she, and she, she smiles at you. She wipes away a little bit of blood come out of her nose. And Martin says, I like it. Nice job, everybody. Not get him ready. They're in the air in one hour. Who shall I punch? No, let's, can somebody meet her, get her some meat? This is, she has sort of a

one-track mind about it. Hey, by the way, is Irene just gone? What happened? Irene is a prison that was constructed to keep me, Cardala. She was actually pretty cool. Can we talk to Irene? Is Irene in there? Sure, go ahead. Ask Irene something.

Irene, what's your favorite movie? I love to watch movies. And I eat popcorn also. I think Irene's gone. That was a trick. Hey, Cardala. Cardalla, I just also want to know, what are you? Is this like a Jekyll and Hyde situation?

Is, is, is, is, all right, what's going on? My name is the thunder goddess Cardala. You may call me Cardala. Cool. I watch over people of the North and protect them and serve bounty, but mainly I have been imprisoned for years inside a prison called Irene Baker. You know of her, yes. Yeah.

Now I have been freed. and all I desire at the moment is meat. I will figure out next steps after that. Big picture. Okay. You know what? Actually, I'm pretty hungry, too. If we could grab a sandwich or something,

I am now apparently human silly putty. And it's a lot to process. So. Remy says, oh, yeah, I could eat. And I try to take, like, a step towards the door, but I leap like 20 feet forward and crash into the wall. And I'm like, okay, I got to recalibrate, I guess, my movement a little bit. I think I can jump super good, by the way, which, to be a little bit honest, is a little disappointing, because I did already know how to jump pretty good.

And also, like, I was an Olympic athlete, and I trained for that my whole life and didn't get weekends or a childhood, really. So if I knew that they could just sort of Matrix super jumping into you, I probably would have just, like, wasted all my time playing Uguio cards. Well, wasting more of my time playing Ukio cards. To be fair, I thought I would become some kind of like, well, I was going to say Reed Richards, and I guess that that is more... Yeah, circle gets the square. Yeah, I meant in the super smart scientist way, but I think the stretchy way, I guess.

Let me see, and she tries to stretch, and she cannot do that. Okay. Okay, so I... Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Not stretchy. Pots, is there any way I can go again and maybe see if I get heat vision this time or flight? Well, no, but I'll tell you one thing, Remy. Well, our indicators show there's still some powers being processed in your hands.

So maybe they'll manifest themselves later on. All of us are just... No, no, just Remy. Just Remy. Something, it's like some kind of energy flow, but it's tough to tell. It may show up later, so we'll just keep an eye on the situation. It's in my hands. Mm-hmm.

In my hands. You'll know that one. Hey, everybody, this is Griffith McRoy, your game player and your best friend and your personal chef. I got a fresher canoli here. Thanks for listening to The Adventure Zone. It's the second episode of our commitment. arc that Daddy is running, and we're so grateful to him for all the stories and all the fruits

of his imagination. It's just the succulent brain fruits that he is gifted to all of us. We hope that you are enjoying this short form arc. I think it's going to run three or four episodes, and we are having a lot of fun doing it, and I hope that you are too. But enough about us. I want to tell you about our sponsors this week. Got some jumbotrons here for you.

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It's, as somebody who hit 30th level earlier this year, let me tell you, once you unlock the elemental skill tree, the game really opens up. Because when you turn 30, you can start doing fireballs. Everybody knows that. Read any anatomy book. I want to thank everybody who's been tweeting about the show using the Zonecast hashtag. It has been so helpful. People have been very, very kind in how they've been sharing the show as we move into this sort of transition phase before we get into season two.

And I cannot tell you how much we appreciate that. We are, you know, only a couple episodes into this story that dad's telling and it'll be over in a couple more episodes. But, like, we're already really super into it and seeing folks like fan art for this stuff and cosplay for this stuff. um is it's it's it's really cool and uh it means it means a lot to us so uh we we sure to appreciate that we also appreciate max fun for having us you can go to maximum fun dot org and check out all the great podcasts there uh shows like lady to lady uh stop podcasting yourself tights and fights just john hodgeman jordan jessie go and so many others all at maximum fun dot org and if you want to check out our other podcasts and our other video stuff that we do you can go to mackroy shows dot com i think that's

That's it. I enjoy the rest of the episode. The next episode of the Adventure Zone commitment will be up on Thursday the 16th. So we'll talk to you then. Bye. It's an hour later and you're on a skimmer. Have we eaten? You're zipping over the waves of the Gulf of Mexico and there are hoagie crumbs and rappers and strombolies and uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, Hot brown remnants, you've just eaten the hell out of a bunch of meat sandwiches. Little man, remind me, this one, stromb, stromboli. Stromboli. It's Italian.

It's Italian for the good sandwich. I very much enjoy the stromboli. So, you're zipping along. And, of course, remember, these are drones that are piloted back. by a pilot on the Berg. So it's just you three. But there is a monitor with a speaker. As you fly along, Parsons, who is the head of risk understanding and basically makes the

assignments, says, hi, everybody. I'm sorry that we had to put you in this situation. Good. So good. Where you are a man of a thousand voices. You find yourselves in this. I apologize. But this is of a.

immediate need, and you are the only intact superpower trio we have at this time. We're still doing the... Did they die? Yeah, intact is a horrible... I'm sorry, alive. You are the only three successful ones so far. There was a chance of unsuccessful? Yeah, wait.

Well, you knew the job was dangerous when you took it for it. We did not. We explicitly did not know the job was dangerous when we took it. you are on a rescue mission and it's a vital importance. You are going to recover. Her name's Mary, but we called her space cadet. She was in the diplomatic department. She was one of the first recipients of the stem plant technology.

And basically, Mary is like a human Wi-Fi network within the 100-yard space, she can basically connect to practically any kind of electronics and exert control over them. But like I said, this is one of the first ones. And there were some after effects that we did not anticipate. Is she evil now? Is that what's going on? No, no. But the technology was not as refined.

And her psyche was damaged. And she fled. She fled the burg without. That's knowing it. If she does not get proper treatment, her condition is going to deteriorate. And we're afraid the paranoia will turn inward and she may harm herself. We really don't want that to happen. Now, as you know, we cannot remove the stem plants, but we do have some treatments that will help her lead a normal life.

Does she have two folks with her also, given her in this like a trio? a triumvirate situation? You're right, Remy, but as far as we know, no, nobody else from the program has left. Like I said, she was one of the first ones. And just when the powers activated with the other two, it just went bad for Mary. A quick clarifying question. Did you try marijuana once and did you inhale? I did not inhale.

Okay, fantastic. But I also have a peanut allergy, so I'm not who you think I am. Oh, twist. Now, Jamie, who works in my department, too, I believe you met her at the mixer. As a matter of fact, I believe that is who you had kind of a budding of heads with. Ah, yes. Bad with names, is Nadia. Jamie and I suspect that Space Cadet has taken refuge in an abandoned theme park on the Gulf of Louisiana.

on the Gulf Coast of Louisiana. The park was built by her parents. Do you remember the televangelist Stan and Sally Sage? They were very big. They had their own TV network, and they were very, very successful. But they were indicted six years ago. Now, they opened this theme park, and it shut down. Is it a religious theme, Noah's Ark theme park?

It is a Bible-related theme park. Excellent. Every creature, every person that you see there, a lot of audio, I mean, a lot of animatronics. They are all from the Bible. Are we going to have to, I'm sorry. Are we going to have to deal with, like, robot Jesus and stuff? Our intelligence does not extend that far. That's a yes from dad.

So I do not know. That's a hard Clint McElroy, yes. Okay. Just then the skimmer lands outside a very large sign. And right before the screen kicks off, you hear Parsons say, Bring her home to us, please. No. Okay.

Little man, thank you for your story, if that was to be a story. I have no interest in Mary. I will depart on my own. own way, fare thee well to all of you. Coward. For conquest, beyond. That's a terrible idea. Sorry, demon?

Oh, I said coward. You're running away is what you said, right? I'm walking backwards away from this. The demon thinks Cardala a coward. No, it's fine. I'll just do it on my own. I don't even need you. I mean, what could you possibly do to help? Jump boy and I will take care of it. Jump boy is very good.

Just as she gets as far as what could you possibly do to help. And Cardala reaches her hands out of her like sort of long white cloak and slaps them together and creates a gust of wind in Nadia's direction. which, let's see, that would be, I guess, will, since it's magic, basically. That is a zero. I might get added to my will, which is a three. It says the opposition is generally fair with creating a specific weather pattern.

So three would be the opposition. So I create a gust of wind towards her. not like, you know, damaging, but basically, you know, super fast. Well, Nadia, what do you do? Oh, I take it. I'm goading Cardala. Yeah, it's definitely a over a psychology situation. Yeah, yeah.

I say it knocks you back a few feet, maybe, kind of staggers you, does not knock you over, but it does definitely push you back, and when it pushes you back, it pushes you back against the hatch the skimmer and it pops open. Okay, so are we all going then? Yeah, I mean, I'm down. Let's just not antagonize the thunder god for just like a general rule. Do you, demon, admit now that you require the assistance of Cardala? Yes, you know, I've seen the error of my ways, Cardala, and I don't think we can do this without you.

Thank you so much for helping us. Look now how the demon begs. Thus is the might of Cardala. Yes, you have convinced me. I take pity on you, lesser creature, and I will follow you to retrieve this, Mary. I get a stromboli out of the skimmer, and I start, like, walking backwards with it, like, this way. The Thunder God is not a dog to be teased. Okay, I thought maybe it'd be like a...

I will, however, relieve you of this stromboli. I thought we might have a E.T. Reese's Pieces situation on our hand. but I was mistaken. All right, you step out of the skimmer, and there's a very large sign that says, Welcome to Hallelujah Land. Oh, geez, literally. And there is a street of... Can I just say, I'm so glad you guys Tart Cardell into that,

because there's nothing I want to see more than the Bible theme park my dad made. Yay! There is a gold road. It's not real gold, or it would have been stripped by now. By the way, everything here is... is in slight disrepair. Oh, so it's like my recurring nightmare of being in an abandoned amusement park. Thanks, Dad.

This is great. Except they're apostles here. I may put spiders in there, too, Trave. Oh, cool. Can they be robot Jesus spiders? You walk along this street of gold and you come up to a gigantic wall, 50 feet high with a giant white gate, which at some point probably was supposed to look like it was carved out of a single pearl, but it's fallen and kind of disappear. But in front of

this gate is half of a statue. You see a large mechanical framework of a man from like the waist up, arms outstretched, palms up, blocking you from getting to the gate. And as you approach, the eyes light up in this bizarre metal face. A lot of the, a lot of it has fallen apart, but you can still see the metallic, and you can still see the palms. The palms are like, you know, eight feet across. They're huge. And a voice comes out of, comes out of the head and says, step up and tell me of your faith. In what do you believe? I mean, this is a very personal question, giant robot. It's just met you.

It's St. Peter. No, I get it. Okay. I just want to make sure that was clear. That's what's going on. Nadia steps up. I believe in science and learning. I'm just trying to...

There's no response, by the way. I feel like Remy's just like, what do we do in here? This is just a big animatronic guy. We don't need to be talking to this right now. I feel like... Step up and tell me... of your faith. In what do you believe?

And you notice that these two hands are equidistant above the ground, about three feet off the ground each. Like scales. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, hard work and perseverance and dedication and loyalty

and any of these, the password? Step up. All right. And tell me of your faith. I jump up onto the left hand. I think we have to step up literally. Good. When you do, the eyes light up and the voice says,

Now, tell me of your faith. In what do you believe? And when you step up on that hand, it sinks to the ground. Anna, can you hop up, or Cardala, can you hop up in the other hand of this very scary? Can you climb up? Yes. I shall be judged. In what do you believe?

Tell me of your faith. Jesus. Jesus in the Bible? Is that it? Yes, like the little man said, Jesus and the Bible. When you say that, your hand,

the hand that Cardales stands on, sinks all the way to the ground. Ah, you enjoy Jesus. I love Jesus. And the Bible that he wields. So terrible. Very.

He's like a co-worker. Yes. Yes, we called him Dave. Oh, geez. All right, Nadia, what do you do? I don't know. So right now, the hands are on the ground, right? No, no, no.

When Cardala got on the palm and activated it, it sank to the ground, and the hand that Remy was standing on raised up in the air. I walk under that hand. Okay. And I head for the gate. Still closed. I hit it really hard with a big hand. hammer fist.

Maybe. Wong. Yes. Nothing. I will join the demon in this path. Cardala hops off and goes to punch the gate. Remy goes right down to the ground on his hand. Ow.

Wong. Okay. I mean, we can make the hands move, and that's great. I think we have to balance it out, maybe, like, scales. Cardala goes back to her platform. Let's both say Jesus at the same time? One, two, three, Jesus? Yes.

You count. One, two, three. Jesus. Cardala's hand goes down to the ground, Remys goes up in the air. Oh, my gosh. We are both saying Jesus. Perhaps my faith is stronger than yours. I have spoken for many minutes about my love of Jesus and his terrible Bible.

Perhaps your faith in Jesus is not as strong as Cardalas. All right, Nadia, get over here and talk about how great science is. You must both believe in Jesus to equal my faith in my new, my newfound faith in Jesus. All right, Nadia climbs up on the hand with Remy. Speak of your love of Jesus, Napa. He's great. Tell me of your faith. In what do you believe?

I believe in science. Jesus. Oh, I thought we were doing, okay. And the hand that you are standing on starts to lower. And the hand that Cardiardom. And Cardalazahn starts to raise. No, wait. Who is science?

No, just kidding. And the hand with Remy and Cardala. I'm sorry, with Remy and Nadia. Slowly sinks down the ground, but very slowly. I'll get off, and I think we're supposed to be balancing sort of faith in science at this point, right? I think that's what this statue is trying to get us to do. Somebody could do an investigation check. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Not Carthal. Okay. So my investigation is plus three. I rolled zero. So that's three. I also got a three. Okay.

You noticed that in the transition of the one arm coming down, when they were equidistant, when they were just about the same, the pearly gates started to hum and vibrate a little bit. But then when you sank the rest of the way down, now this is with both of you on it. Yeah, I'm getting off. I think that's what we need to do. Some, Cardala, you're on that hand. Nadia, you're on that hand. Nadia, you do all your science jazz. Okay.

And Cardaul, you talk about how great your best friend Jesus is with his awesome vibe. Does anyone know anything else about Jesus? I feel like I'm beginning to repeat myself. He did, he made one fish turn into like a bunch of fish. Ah, this I can respect. Provider Jesus, the creator of fish. I love him very much. And I believe in him and his terrible scythe-like.

Bible. And Nadia, what's the best elements? Just start science and give me that jazz. I'm not a chemist. You know that, okay. I just say some science stuff and how great it is. I like lasers and making fake skin and

polymers and plastics and microchips. Beakers and bunsen burners and stuff. I love science. As you speak, your hand sinks, sinks, sinks, And there's a moment, again, whether the same distance off.

Get off, get off, then we get off. Then we get off. And the pearly gates open. Hey, we did it. Everything in moderation, folks. That's why I believe in science, Jesus. All right, so you follow this street of gold past the pearly gates. And you're walking around. You eventually come up to a very large clearing. and this clearing is full of wild.

I mean, it's overgrown, but it's kind of this wild version of lilies of the valley. So this field is sprung up, overgrown, weedy, but you can still see the lilies of the valley. And you walk into this clearing and what do you do? Okay, I'm going to do notice. Yeah, I got a one on notice. I got zero. I roll negative one plus my one. Equal zero.

The only thing you really notice is that even though this is overgrown, you can still see the street of gold stretching on ahead to a bunch of trees. And as you look, through the trees comes a woman riding on a unicorn. This is the weirdest Bible place ever, because they definitely, I don't think, were in that one. And you hear a voice say, Isaiah 347, and the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls, and their land shall be soaked up with blood. I was, I stand corrected. And their dust made fat with fatness.

There's unicorns in the Bible, y'all. Had no idea. The unicorn trots up and the woman gets off of the unicorn. Is it a robot woman? It is a robot woman, yes. And as she walks up, you hear a voice speak and the voice says, Mark 622-25. When the daughter of Herodias came and danced,

he pleased Herod and his dinner guests. And the king said, Ask me for everything you want, and I'll give it to you. And he promised her an oath. Whatever you ask, I shall give you. She went out and asked her mother, what shall I ask for? And her mother said, I know this one.

The head of John the Baptist. Aw. And at that point, the robotic woman pulls her hand out from behind. her back and sure enough, she has the severed head of a man. Her fingers tangled in his hair. Happy Halloween, everybody. Is that a robot head? It's a robot head. Okay. And the robot woman screams, get out! And when she says that the eyes of the severed head opens and fix on you, and the head speaks, I'd listen to her, fellas. She always gets what she wants. Trust me. And the unicorn charges towards you.

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