The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Commitment - Episode 4

Episode Date: November 30, 2017

Our heroes come face-to-face with the King of America in the climactic finale of our Commitment arc. Remy does those good flips. Nadiya causes some collateral damage. Kardala swears her very genuine, heartfelt loyalty. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

kind of reset the scene a little bit. You are in this debriefing room in the security branch of the Berg. Also in this room, lounging in a very large, I don't know, throne-like looking chair is a man who just identified himself as Richard, the king of the USA. I think he said I'm the fucking king of the USA. The fucking king. That cuss shook me to my core. The cuss was so unnecessary. The fucking king of the USA, man. Maybe he said he's the fuck king. of the USA. Possibly. That's what it says on my license plate.

I don't know. I think Remy pretty much reflexively responds, No, you're not. Yeah, I understand. Listen, hey, look, this is a wild concept. But let me tell you my story, and then we'll chat. We'll have a confab.

No. And Nadia turns to walk out. wait, hold on. I think you'll find this interesting. And this is going to impact everything that comes after this. Okay, so we've got to start off a little history lesson, okay? By the way, I got crudite up here. I got sparkling water.

There's some shrimps. If you guys want to munch on something while I... I already have a mouthful of shrimp, and I say, what's croutet? I, too, will eat your shrimp. Yeah, I asked for stromboli, but apparently we're out. I don't know what's the deal there. Yes, I claim. the stromboli. Okay, so go back in history a little bit. King George III, the king of England.

Did you know that his reign as king was longer than any other monarch before since in England? Sixty years, and he was a fighter. He fought lots of wars. He fought in Europe and Africa and agent. Well, he dispatched armies. But like any good fighter, he knew when he was beaten. And in the fall of 1781, he got, he figured it out. He knew he is not going to be able to win again. the American colony. America, baby. We did it. Well, it was too expensive, I mean, financially, and his reputation, you know, for five years,

he couldn't beat a bunch of Scrowdy Ralph farmers in a war. You know, other colonies were talking about it. The other crown heads of Europe were talking about it. So, George E3 was, you know, just looking bad, France and Spain and all of his country club buddies, all the Hoy-Polloy. So King Georgia Third decided. he'd make a last-ditch Hail Mary play to hold on to his rep. And he realized he was probably going to take a check in the lost column,

but maybe he could put an asterisk next to it. August 12th, 1781, he signed a royal decree naming a regent over the Americas, basically naming a king to rule. that he did this in secrecy, and in secrecy, he had that decree immediately dispatched to America on his fastest ship. But it doesn't matter how faster ship is, the Atlantic Ocean, not a good collaborator. So it didn't show up until October 26th. That was one week after General Cornwallis surrendered to George Washington in Yorktown, which basically made the American colonies a free state, but not really.

Should I be taking notes on all this? Not legally. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. But no, no, just let it work on you. Let the story wash over you. Okay. Okay. Now, what people forget is there was almost a year of negotiations with England,

negotiating the peace. And those negotiations were headed up by the very man who was, in fact, the new king of this country. And that was Ben Franklin. Ben Franklin was named the king of the colonies. And it makes sense. For most of his life, Ben really considered himself to be an Englishman. As a matter of fact, for like 10 years, he was in England. Before the war started, he argued for colonial independence. So he was loved in all of Europe. Side note. Clinton. This is Travis speaking, not Nadia. How much of this is real to actual historical fact and how much is Dad's game bullshit? Well, the Royal Decrees could have happened. All right.

All right. Hey, second question, follow up. Are you a Illuminati? Maybe a little bit? Just you have to tell us if you're a Lumini. You legally have to tell us if you're the... Do you mean Dad or the character? I think Dad. Right now, Dad. Yeah, right now, Dad. Dad. I'm really not allowed to tell you if I'm Not a good boys. That's a confirmation. All right. So when the document finally got to Ben, he was torn. Didn't know what to do.

But he really thought that this young country would have a better chance of survival as a democracy. So he never told his wife. And he never told his son William, who was a bastard, by the way. Don't know if you knew that or not. Hey, that's not very nice. Yeah, that's kind of mean. He's a kid. But Ben did tell his grandson.

Temple was his name. Also a bastard. You know, Game of Thrones didn't invent this shit. It was Temple who kept all of this going. And down through the ages, it passed from grandparent to grandchild. And that was the legacy of the king of the USA with a bloodline leading all the way to W. Dick.

To Dick. To Dick. King Dick. I love that. Don't you? Don't you love that? that, King Dick the first? I don't think I can overstay how much I don't love it.

I, I, this is, this is great in all very national treasure book of secrets, too. I just, it doesn't confer any special powers, right? Yeah, it's, it's not really how it works. Like, I'm queen of Belgium. Like, I, it doesn't, I'm not if everybody kind of agrees on it, it's... One time in middle school, I wanted the state spelling bee, and I got a sash that said best speller in the state on it. But I don't, I'm not still the best speller in the state.

And it didn't give me any sort of like control of an army. You know what I mean? It's just a title. Yeah. Oh, no. Yeah, it's a title. But that's what my family has done down through the generation. Irene's grandmother once gave her a star.

She did not claim this star. She never visited her star. It's like that. It's a lot. Yeah, it's a great, great example. Those are great points. But the key is the do good fellowship. has been doing great things for hundreds of years.

And it's an example of what can be accomplished under, well, basically, my leadership. Let me give you an example. I understand your concerns. I understand your fears. But I and my descendants before me, we really believe in this. Cool. We've made all this money. You know, Ben didn't believe in patents.

He said that if you invented something, it would be shared with everybody. Temple didn't agree with that. And so he has arranged things and all through history, that's what my family has been doing. Do you know that Ben was the first U.S. postmaster? Postmaster General of the United States. He was the first one. Yeah, even Remy knows that. Yeah, I mean that.

But what you didn't know is... He's a secret king of America. As a reward to Ben Franklin and his descendants, it was decided that a tenth of every penny for every stamp minted would go to the Franklin family. How did they cut that up? Yeah, how are you going to spend a little sliver of metal? A little wedge of a penny.

Savings. Oh, you're taking me literally. I understand. Yes, it was a joke. I don't know if that... Was that clear? We do jokes here. We invented Bitcoin, too.

So are you asking us to be subjects to your secret monarchy? Is that the sort of TLDR here? I'm glad you called the question. Tonight is my first big step towards assuming the throne. I would like you guys to be on my side in this. You've seen what we can do. You've seen what the Do Good Fellowship can accomplish. You see the technical breakthroughs we've come up with and everything else.

and I would like to know if you guys are with me or against me. If we choose the latter, is it going to turn into sort of a kill-on-site situation in here? Or what's the deal there? Oh, no. Richard. If you decide, no, if you decide you don't want to do it, we call a deal a deal. You go see Mr. Garfield in the finance department. You get your last paychecks.

and it's thanks. Listen, this is not a military coup. This is not a revolution or anything like that. Just then there's a voice that you hear behind you in the room. Alexa, play Royal Playlist M. And Tears for Fears, Everybody Wants to Rule the World starts to play. It's a good jam. A little on knows.

Richard says Damn, you do love that song, my love. Oh, by the way, guys, I think you've met the Royal Consort. Martin and Martine walks into the room and stands next to Richard. Is Martin the one that threatened us with a gun while we were getting our spray tan?

I was just doing my job, fellas. Head of security. You know that. Oh, the one I hit with a, like, I think a cinderblock or a hammer. Do you mind, can we work kind of a pack? I could still, I guess. Do you mind if we confer for a little bit? Oh, absolutely. This is what it all comes down to. The time has come for you to show your commitment. The greatest president, although I'm not really that big a fan of the title, John Adams said, there are only two creatures

of value on the face of the earth, those with the commitment and those who require the commitment of others. You know, we're talking like commitment to a friend, commitment. to a lover, commitment to a family, commitment to an organization, to a government, to an ideology. I just want to know if you three, Remy, Nadia, Cardala, Irene, if you're in there, if you are committed to me. I'm going to leave you guys alone. Martina and I are going to leave you alone. Let's talk about it a little bit when you've made up your minds. just tell Alexa and she'll give you instructions.

I got to go, Martina and I got to get ready. Okay, dookies. Sounds good. Great. Thanks a lot. All right, you guys. Yeah, have a good one. Bye, weirdos.

See, okay, yeah, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye. And they walk out the door. Okay, hey, we need to get the fuck out of here, right? Yeah, yeah. It would seem, yes. Okay, because what are you saying? All of that, great, but Secret King of America, I don't, this guy's, this guy seems pretty dangerous. It's not that I just like super duper love our current government or the idea of government in general,

but as soon as someone starts talking about like, I'm the secret king of America and ascend to the throne or whatever, it starts to kind of cross outside the realm of, you know, normalcy and logic and into the realm of, okay, bye. Also, Martin did threaten us with guns when we didn't really do anything. And so I'm worried about sort of where they... I mean, she'd fit in well leading America right now, but... Sure. Cardala, how are you feeling?

Cardola serves no man. You just should not come as a surprise. And it doesn't. Yeah, yeah, that's fine. I serve no one, but... The rhythm. Cardola and Irene, we are bound. Cardala serves no one, but I am...

bound to you too. I care not for the king. I care not for the president. I care not for anything other than you too, because we are bound, and without you, I am forced back into the intolerable prison of Irene, which is a fate I shall not pursue.

You have my support. You old softy, it is not I should make clear an emotional decision for me. Fantastic. If the two of you were to die and be replaced by others in different shapes and personages and personalities and different looks and different everything, Cardala would still feel the same. No, yeah.

We're still working. We're still working on this thing. If you do die, is there a plan to replace you as soon as humanly possible? This is my worry. If we lose this do-good fellowship and one of you two were to die and I would. would be, of course, in the prison of Irene, never to return. Right.

That would be a problem for me. Sure. I mean, Cardella brings up a good point. If we take off, we might lose these powers. I'm not exactly sure how that works. If I may, let's approach this logically. If we leave, we abandon all influence over the situation. If we remain and say yes, we are not bound by law to do

anything. Oh, hell yeah, dude, sedition time. Is that what you're... That's exactly what I'm saying. We could do more from the inside than the outside. Oh, one, hey, hold on one second. Alexa. Yes. You're not like recording all this, are you? I don't know, maybe. Okay, delete the last five minutes. Um, I go over and unplug the Alexa machine if there is one. Wait, plug it back in for a moment. Okay, I plug it back in. We were just kidding. Ha, another fine joke from you two. You got it. I can't wait to serve this great king.

Yes, very powerful and just. Ha, ha, ha. Okay, so Alexa was, I'm just going to unplug it. Did you see? Subterfuge. Yeah, you did great. It was very good. You're the royal spy.

So let's, I guess, tell him that we're in. I didn't mean it. Yes. We won't serve the king, you see. It was a joke. A joke I played on the robot. Yep. All right.

So let's, it might get tough. Like, we don't really know what we're going up against. And to be frank, I don't really know why I'm going up against it. It's just sort of a gut feeling. Well, let's take stock, all right? You have like, you can jump real good and punch real good. I can turn my body into weapons and Cardala is a god. Thank you.

So I think we're could. Cool. All right. I plug Alexa back in. Alexa, we're down to clown. Step out into the lobby and follow the 24 question mark logo. Oh, God. All right.

So you step out in the hallway and there's a big projected 24 question mark logo and it leads you down the hallway. It leads you from the security wing into the very central hub. of the Berg. You have not been in this particular area before. It's a very large chamber. It's a large chamber that is similar to the installation room you were in before in the fact that it's cut in half by a very large glass wall with a door in the middle of it. And the far side is a raised platform, a big square platform in the far side.

in the far half with a 24 question mark logo on it. And on this side of the door, you have three of your friends, well, co-workers that you remember from the mixer, Sylvain, the security guy, who is carrying two very large knives. Great. Is that his super power? He can have two knives? Knife have her. You will find out soon.

hope, well, maybe not. Maybe you won't find out soon. Another male, Lid, and Jamie, who you've also met. And they're all geared up in their vests and ready to go. But in front of them, between you and them, stands Richard, King Dick Wannaby, smiling, his arms spread wide. And he says, all right, my friends, have you made your decisions? Yes. We're very excited to serve you a real king.

Excellent. What about you guys? It may seem like we are too excited. Yep, yep, yep. Yes, we're in. Super excited, super excited. Totally. Well, I want to make sure.

My liege. Oh, I love it. So all three of you are in? We had no hesitation. So glorious was your. vision, we are so excited to serve you a real king.

That is what I see, I told you, this is going to work. I told you. He's calling back through the open door to Martin who's standing there. I told you this is going to work. I told you they'd be on board. Excellent. Okay. We're about ready to get started. I tell you what, since you're the most fervent and the most excited, Cardala, I want you to come with me and help me out with the next phase of this plan.

And you guys, you know, just Nadia, Remy, just chill out here for a while with your buddies with Lid and them. Cardala, would you come with me just into the next half of the room? No, my king. No. Thank you for your kind guidance, my king. Well, I could really use your help, and as your king, I'm kind of making it a royal decree. Nadia just makes eye contact with Cardella and kind of nods a little bit. Like, yes, go.

Hey, Miley, this is, and your royal authority is beautiful and the chosen one and all that. But it does feel a little, it's, it's, there's a bit of like a sort of a trap vibe, if I'm being totally honest. And like we told, we sober it down. I don't really know why that would be the situation. No, no, no, no. Nadi turns both of her hands into blades and points them at Cardala and Ramean says, How dare you question the king? Yes, you are right.

I do love the king. And everything he says is so grand. And I will come with him. I just need these two to come with me. I'm like their king. A sub-king situation. You're my king and I'm sort of their king. King, I think I understand the relationship.

That's fine. But you know what? Let's all go into the other half. Everybody, come on. Everybody come in there. I want you to see what's up because I think you still aren't completely convinced. I know you've agreed to be on my side. So let me tell you what's going on.

Like I said, there's no coup, there's no blood. This is going to play out in the court of public opinion. I am going to debate and everybody in the country is going to watch. I'm just going to lay my case out there, get the public behind me like I convinced you three. Yes. Not attacking anybody, not hurting anybody. But I need one of you, somebody who is plugged into their humanity, I guess, to serve as, as my debater.

We're gonna debate this. And I need one of you to debate me. Is there a role I can do to like get a feel for for Dix? Is there an insight? There's an empathy role, but I don't know if that's necessarily it. Who has the highest empathy among the three of you? Fucking Irene. Right.

We could, I have two, I have two empathy. I could take a, I could take a swing at it. All right. No, I got a negative. No, that's a negative, yeah, mm-hmm. I mean, you have to contest it with deceive or rapport if you're telling the truth, but... I tell you what, you get a read from Richard that he's sincere, that he's honest. This is really what he feels.

He seems to be on the level. Richard, my leash, and my king, my lord, I do think that if you go public with this right now, we're going to have the, you know, the Marines or something on top of us by, like, the end of the hour. Well, trust me, we've thought about this. that this base, the Berg, is completely defensible. Trust me. And if things work out the way I think they are, we're not going to need very long. Let's just kind of see how this plays out.

From the other room, Martin says, Dick, honey, time to go. You've got to get started. His name is Dick, Honey? No, it's actually Dick Poor, Richard Poor. Oh, I see. Like poor Richard? Oh, God. I see. Come on in, guys. Come on, come on. Everybody come on in the room. So everybody goes into that half of the room. And I'm moving icons here. So you don't freak out. Oh, here go. You have to like set it as the active page. There we go. Oh, there we are. A lot of rain. Yeah. Yama yama. Well, this is a, this a heck of a map. It doesn't seem like a welcoming room. All right, right off the bat, you notice something. On the far side of the raised platform, Richard is now standing.

on the race platform. There is a large chair, and seated in that chair is Mary Sage, Space Cadet, and standing next to her on either side are two men, and there are operatives you remember from the mixer that weren't total jerks, Addison and Flanagan. Also, in this general area, is another operative named Gray, who I don't think you've encountered yet. Richard steps up onto the raised platform and says, Cardinal, come on, we're getting ready to get started. Yes. So Cardala goes up onto the race platform with Richard.

Martine turns and looks at Flanagan, who raises a hand in the air. And suddenly this black energy surrounds Flanagan. And Flanagan places a hand on Addison's shoulder. And that black energy seems to flow through, through Addison, into Mary Sage. And Mary's thing of her hair starting to wave up, her eyes lighting up. She is powering up. But she's powering up like never before.

Her powers are incredibly enhanced. And Richard turns to you and says, see, this is how I'm going to talk to everybody. You couldn't get a fucking webcam or something? my dude. I didn't, that wouldn't assure that everybody would see this. This is going to show up on every screen, in every digital readout, in every computer, in every game, anything with a chip in it. Hell, it might show up in somebody's microwave of it. I don't know. But this message is going to go to everybody, courtesy of Mary's power enhanced by these two. Is that not awesome? I mean, yeah, actually,

like, yeah. When you're done doing your thing, can I just put my mixtape out there? Hey, oh, that's a great idea. I wish we had, I don't know if we can do sound. So Addison's a conduit. Flanagan creates the energy. The energy. Okay.

It goes into Mary. Got it. Okay. So they are three operatives. They are three heroes. They are three operatives, correct. Okay. So Richard looks up and says, Alexa,

play Royal Fanfare One. And he says, friends, I am your king. Big bold start. Richard Poor. King Dick. Public opinion. And I am here to pass along a very important message to you. This nation has outgrown its method for choosing its leaders.

Think about this. Every four years, sometimes eight years, this country is bitterly divided. Every four years a new person steps into the leadership of this country and has to reinvent the wheel, reforge alliances, restate his or her vision. I believe in vision, not da vision. Let me bring everybody together. I am the legal, rightful king of the United Sovereignty of America. Alexa, attach the file visual of the real. royal decree. Dad, do you assume at this point everyone thought they were getting viral marketing

for a new Kingsman movie and have already tried to close it? Yeah, you have to assume. Can't close it, though. Can't close it. Can't close it. Uh-uh. I want to provide the leadership to you that will make this country not only as the most powerful country on the planet, but the best country and the planet, doing great stuff like the Do Good Fellowship has done for years. I want you to show the same courage that those Grouty Ralph farmers showed. I'm not talking about a revolution. I'm not talking about a coup. I'm talking about replacing a CEO. What if you had to change the boss of a business every four years and start all over again? No violence, no bloodshed. Just me providing a vision.

Cardala, tell him what we're talking about. Yes. My name is Cardala, and I love this excellent king. For many minutes, I have served him, and he has always shown himself to be the king of America. And I am very excited. about how much I love this great king. And this is not a joke or a trick.

Good try. Good try. Right now, my head of information tech is uploading a file to each one of you, listing all the amazing things the Do Good Fellowship has done for the last couple of centuries, and Potts pushes a button from his operating station. From our R&D department comes a list of all the marvelous scientific innovations. we have initiated, and Joe pushes a button. Medical breakthroughs, Grace pushes a button. New techniques and finance, Mr. Garfield pushes a button.

International relationships. Scully pushes a button. Dance moves. All these attachments go. Recipes. This is what I am offering. This kind of leadership from an organization that believes in me and what I stand for, that a king would be the best thing.

for this country. And at that moment, Mary Sage starts to scream. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Mary Sage is completely surrounded by this quivering black energy. And she screams again. And you see blood coming out of her nose. Addison says, uh, boss, it's too much for, I, I think, I, I think. I, I, I think. think it's way too much for Mary. Cardala looks into the camera and says, America, meet your king. You have met him and you know his great wisdom.

Now, behold your God. And then tackles Addison. Okay. Nadia is also ready to go. Like, Nadia's just been watching Cardala this whole time and kind of counting down an imaginary countdown in her headlight. Yeah, sure. Mm-hmm.

All right, so you moved a tackler. Okay. That's a four, which in the fate ladder is great. A great tackle from Cardala. A great tackle from Cardala. As Cardola starts to make the move towards Mary, Sylvain moves. And with super speed, which is his power, places himself between Mary and Cardala. Cardala tackles Sylvain, and Sylvain's momentum carries Cardala off the platform and off to the left side, off to the floor.

He takes two in physical stress and a mild consequence that his ankle is kind of dinged up. He can still move, but he can't move very fast. But injured ankle, that's an alley. Owie on the ankle. He's got an owie. He's got a big owie. Yeah, I'll mark there then. Richard says,

whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute, wait a minute. There's no need, no need for that. Let's, you know, if it's, if it's killing Mary, let's shut it down and we'll, you know, we'll finish this later. We've kind of made our case already. And Martine takes her gun out and points in it Mary's head and says, I don't think so, sweetheart. I think we need to finish this.

I say, well, this sure didn't last very long, and I jump at Martine to try to interrupt this hostage situation. Awesome. If this thing's popping off, we may as well just do it. I got a five on my athletics role. Okay. I'm not trying to, like, tackle or, like, injure in any way. I'm just literally trying to jump, jump into her to keep, keep to.

to cool this situation a little bit. And as you're coming down on her, her eyes flash red because she too is augmented with the stem plants. Fantastic, fantastic. Her eyes flash and heat beams come out of them. Son of no, this sucks. This is bullshit. They just barely, they miss you, but she does shoot heat beams out of her eyes. Damn it.

Nadia, what do you do? While this is going on, Nadia walks up calmly, turns her hand into a knife and puts it to Richard throat. Okay. I think we're done. Let's see. Let me think here for a second. Give me a second. I did not expect this.

Yeah, I can roll to intimidate. Do a roll to intimidate. Oh, sorry, I said intimidate, and then I realize there is no intimidate in fate. I believe what I meant to say was provoke. So plus five provoke, and I am a timidate. attempting to create an advantage by invoking or provoking an emotional state from my target. And your target opposes with will. So what did Martine roll on the Will roll?

Did Martin? The Zero and Martines. Got talking to the mic. I'm sorry. Yep. These mics, when did we start using them? Our last dad was a radio professional, so it's hard for me to keep up with the new dad. Um, plus one on that role.

So, you successfully provoke her. What's the emotional aspect that you have put? I would like to, uh, create an advantage with hesitant. Okay. Um, just, you know, she's got a gun pointed and marry. Well, she's got heap eyes and I, it seems redundant to also have gun, but, but I just want to create a little, just some hesitation there to be invoked later. All right.

I like that. That's good. There's a little hesitation there. She isn't quite sure. So she powers down her eye beams and says, you really wouldn't hurt him. He's an innocent. He's a good man.

I really would. She super would. Trust me on this one. I super duper would. All right. Okay, well, we'll up the ante a little bit. And she turns to Mary. And she says, Mary, shut down all electronics in the United States of America.

Uh-oh, how's our heroes going to get out of this pickle? Hey, everybody, this is Griffin McRoy, your game player and your best friend. And thank you for listening to The Adventure Zone. This is the last episode of the commitment arc that Dad put together for us, and we're really happy with how it turned out. We have been talking about some changes that we want to do to help this sort of experimentation between seasons process go a little bit smoother and a little bit faster. And we will have something to announce on that front very soon.

So stay tuned. We're just really eager to get to whatever season two is going to be and really start putting together that big next story that we want to tell. So we'll let you know real soon what we've decided on. For now, though, let's get to the advertisements. First off, I want to tell you about movement watches. That's MVMT watches, a company that was founded on the belief that style should not break the bank. I have a movement watch. I think all of us do, and I'm really enamored with it.

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glad I made you listen to all of the adventure zone so you could experience how awesome it is, unless I'm being super optimistic by submitting this jumbotron when you're only on episode two. But if you gave up, then you won't hear this message. So I guess that's not too embarrassing for me. Bye. It's so important when you send these messages in to still treat them like proper letters with a classic sign-off, a good salutation in there. I know this is a podcast and, you know, we're just doing ding-dong jokes 24-7, but a little bit of decorum, it really goes a long way. It's a fancy podcast. I demand to be treated like you're at Catillion or something. Jack, I hope you managed to stick with it, but, you know, those first few episodes are pretty rough. So if you bailed, it's all good. All right, here's a message for Danny Boy.

And it's from Hawkeye, and the message says, poop truck. So that's in the podcast forever now. And in the future, when this digital file is in the Library of Congress or some sort of alien archive, you know, if they take over and won all our digital media. That's going to be there in there forever. It's timeless and forever and eternal, and it'll never die. But good job, Hawkeye and Danny Boy. I hope that, I hope it was worth it. Hey, thanks for tweeting about this show,

The Adventure Zone, using the Zonecast hashtag. We sure do appreciate you spreading the word, especially as we are sort of between seasons and could use some help getting new listeners on board as we try out these new things. If you got a friend who's into more comic book stuff, when we finish this episode, or it's already finished, but when you finish this episode,

we'll have this little self-contained superhero short story. And maybe you can turn your friends onto the show that way or if they like whatever the next genre is going to be, then maybe sharing it that way would be good. We don't pay to advertise the show at all. And so we sure do appreciate you going out and spreading the word, because word of mouth is the only way that we've been able to have this really awesome, very unique listenership that we have today. Thank you to Maximum Fund for having us. You can go to maximum fun.org and check out all the great shows there. Shows like Stop Podcasting yourself, one bad mother, Jordan Jesse Go, Judge John Hodgman, and so many others. And if you want to hear other

podcasts or video stuff or anything that we do, you can go to macaroyshows.com and find links to all that stuff there. I think that's it. We are going to be doing a Tacoma live show that we're real excited. I've almost finished prepping for it and I think it's going to be a really, really fun one. That will probably be the next proper episode that you hear as we sort of get ready for the next experimental arc. But again, stay tuned for more information. We are changing a little bit how we are going to be doing these experimental games and an effort to get to season two a little bit faster. And like I said earlier, we'll let you know whenever we have more details on that. So yeah, enjoy the rest of the episode, the finale of Taz's commitment. And we will be back with a

new episode on December 14th. Holy shit. 2017, we hardly knew you. That's not true. We knew you pretty well. And you fucking sucked. See you next time. Mary, shut down all electronics in the United States of America? Martine, you'll be cutting off power to hospitals and vehicles and stoplights and and people depending on technology to live. You're going to kill a lot of people. That's not what I want. Martine says, I don't think so.

I love you, Dick, but I just don't think you had what it takes to follow it through. Mary, belay that order? Don't do that. Please. You don't want to be responsible for that. Onix, Conduit, are you just like cool with this? You're cool with that, guys? You too are just super cool with it.

Onix is so deep in concentration, somebody in all this energy. But Addison says, oh, no, not really. I got a really bad feeling about this. Yeah. Yeah, no kidding. He said she's going to shut off all electronics. It's not a feeling.

Mary screams again. All right, Addison, you either let go or I'm going to, I swear to God, I'm going to come at you. Like a fucking tiger. This is not a joke. Let go right now. Addison says, man, I don't think I can. All right. I did, I just straight up, though, just right now, you understand.

I did give you a fair warning. And I jump at Addison now. I'm just going to fucking, like, pink. Pong around the room, I guess, jumping on whoever needs to be jumped at. And this one is going to be a fight roll. Okay.

Roll it. That's going to be a 1 plus 5, a 6. Whoa. Wait, your fight's 5? It's a 3 plus with my natural weapon. Oh, cool. Neat. Okay.

I'm just trying to knock him. I'm not trying to like, I'm not trying to punch to hurt him. But my punches sort of pass on this kinetic force. I'm going to knock Addison as far away from Mary as I possibly can. Describe it. I leap off of Martine and kind of fly over Mary and with my knees up. Oh, like, on box style.

I collide with Addison. And right as I hit Addison, I sort of extend my palms in this wave of force, shoots out and knocks them across the room. Okay, presumably, because we don't know what Addison's opposition of that was. Yeah, it was a negative one. Hachy-Machi.

Yeah, you not only knock Addison down and away, he goes flying. And I... That's seven. That is... I did hit Addison for seven points of stress. Non-lethal. And I think you knocked him out.

You didn't just knock him out the way. You knocked him out. I'm so sorry that was way more way harsher that I thought it was going to be still getting used he's unconscious

okay you can also add an added benefit on top of that girlfriend since you succeeded with style oh yeah so

you add an aspect to the situation you can add an aspect yeah so I actually get a special effect which is the thing that each of our characters

have you add an aspect to the target which you can invoke once for free or you can move up to two zones for free so I'm going to say

I'll take extra movement and just like after I collided with him, I do a perfect backflip to the air and I'm standing right next to Martine again. All right. Martine, her eyes flare up again. Mary's head kind of slumps forward and Onyx is still summoning energy, but there's no longer a conduit. But Mary's power is still activated, not as powerful as it was. her hair still extended and you can tell that she's still got her power, but her head is kind of slumped forward in pain and in exhaustion. As a matter of fact, she has taken three physical stress because of all the things that were going on. Okay.

Martine fires a heat blast from her eyes at Nadia. One, two, has five in shoot. So one, two, She shoots the heat beams effectively at Nadia. Nadia, what do you do? So you have to defend with athletics against shoot. Yes, so that's a plus one to athletics. My athletics is plus one. Yikes. So that's a two versus what was it?

A seven. Was it? It was pretty freaking good. Well, I'm going to use collateral damage. If an attack is going to hit rather than becoming denser, you can decrease your mass so the attack passes through you, but the attack will continue on and damage another target. So sorry, Richard.

Bye. Oh, shit. Okay. Who's the other target? Richard. I mean, it's going to, you knew it was going to be Richard, right, Dad? It smashes into Richard because you are intangible. All right?

Uh-huh. it knocks him away from you, knocks him off the platform, and he is really fucked up. He is, his clothes are on fire. He's screaming. I say, I say, Martin, why should you do that?

Whoa. And Martine just wigs out. just absolutely wigs out. Raises her gun, her eyes flash, and she's just going to bring down 17 kinds of hell on all you guys. That's when Mary looks up and looks at Martine and says, You shithead, you were going to make me kill thousands of people. Probably millions.

Probably millions. Screw you. She squints her eyes, and there's this humongous tremor that runs through the entire room. Hell, runs through the entire burgh. Instantly, the 12 branches that house the different departments separate from the central hub and start to submerge. And the central hub is rocked by this. It was never designed for all of the branches. separate and become distinct vehicles or whatever at the same time.

And things start going to that 17 kinds of hell all of a sudden. The central hub now basically a huge floating platform starts to rock back and forth. And the stress on the building is huge. the cracks start appearing in the walls and in the ceiling. And Martine rushes over to Richard's side. But this has started a chain reaction that just is not going to stop. Onyx and runs over and picks up Addison and takes off. They flee.

They run. So does Gray. Gray runs after them. And so do the other operatives, except for Sylvain. Sylvain is still standing there, waving his knives. He has positioned himself between you guys and Martine and Richard. And they're by the door? Yeah. The cracks in the walls start getting even larger.

And large chunks of the ceiling start falling, exposed. the sky and the air outside. Machinery technology starts exploding, and you hear a claxon starts to ring, telling people to escape, to leave. And Martin looks up from Richard's body and says, he's still alive, no thanks to you. You're the one that shot him. Yeah, it's you.

You did that. Well, shut up. Okay. Mary, could you stop? You've made your point. No, I can't stop anything. I sent them away. I split it all up. You did great. No, you did awesome. But we're still here and we really need to get out of here and it'll be a lot easier if you weren't tearing the base apart while that was happening. Can you walk? I can. Wait a minute. I have an idea.

and all of a sudden, through one of the cracking, decrepit walls of the room, a skimmer comes blasting through and settles down amongst the debris and the dust and everything else. And through that hole in the wall, you can see that the central hub is starting to submerge. Okay, bye. Everybody on, Potsie? Come on, bud. Oh, Potsie, already left. It's just us, right? Now everybody else split.

it's just you guys oh yeah well we're leaping onto the skimmer for sure yeah and martin can fuck right off well I say come on you all should get on board we don't no guys come on

you're gonna die if you stay here and we really need to get going if you want your king to be safe we we gotta go right now Cardala runs over to Martin and Dick and picks them up

in one in each arm and says please my king your safety is paramount to me we're not doing that I'm saving the king surely I will be honored for this for this amazing contribution Cardala is running towards the skimmer with both of them all right

and Sylvain can't follow very quickly because of his injured leg so he goes limping and he runs out the door to try to find some other kind of escape Okay, bye. Bye, Sylvain. And you guys took Mary, right?

Yes. Yeah, for sure. So she looks down and she's lost a lot of blood and she tries to start the skimmer and it's just not responding. It's damaged itself when it came crashing through the wall. And the platform, the central hub is now starting to sink below the waves. and the water is starting to come pouring in and basically is surrounding the skimmer. Really?

Allow me. And Cardala claps her hands and summons a thunderbolt to hit the skimmer. This is good. Cardala has a, I would say, a poor understanding of electronics but thinks that this should do the job. Who do?

So that is, I'm rolling against the opposition of two, and it's a will roll. Zero. I am going to, I'm going to, okay, go ahead. Three, so three. So three. So I do create the, the lightning bolt. The lightning bolt hits the skimmer, and somehow that kind of jump starts everything. And Mary says, hang on to something, just as the platform starts to go under the waves. and the skimmer backs up out of the hole and hovers there on the waves,

and you see the central hub sink under the water. You also see in the distance a number of other skimmers start to fly off, and they're all gone. You're watching this awesome hole in the water come crashing in like the Red Sea filling back in after parting. I say, I'm going to have to buy some new clothes. Shit. I look at Martine and I say, oh, this is so important.

I can't, I have to tell you one thing. Bonk. And I turn, Nadia turns her right arm into a baseball bat and clobbers are trying to knock her unconscious. Oh, no. Well, it only ends up being a plus two. Not great. Okay, so a plus two and athletics roll. to defend.

Ah, it's all right. It's a minus four. Okay. So, real comedy of error. It's got going on here. The bat wax up against her head, and she collapses right next to Richard. Is Richard conscious?

He is conscious, but he's in a lot of pain. Good. Sorry about your kingdom. This is, uh, wow, what a waste. Yes. I believe that represents mini stamps. Uh, bummer, I guess. It's not the end of the kingdom.

And it's not the end of me. You might have shut down this, but I believe in what I stand for. I am committed. Blanc. It's just rolled in the program again. Uh, that's a... So what is that trap?

So that is being, uh, plus four. Okay. And, uh, in his weakened condition, that knocks him right out. He's gone. You know, demon, I like you more and more. I talk to Mary and I say, Hey, I'm glad you're, you're doing okay. Are you the one flying this thing right now with your, uh, brain powers?

Mm-hmm. Where, where do you want to go? The White House, I guess? And what are you going to do? Hand over the King of America? I don't know. I'm just kind of thinking out loud. You know the White House is in a prison, right? Remy?

Like, we could go to, like, Joliet or... Yeah, but you can't just take a guy to jail and just be like, here, I got a new one for you. That's true. What exactly crime do you want him to be charged with? Sedition, treason. Treason's a good one. I mean, he did just sort of broadcast his treason. to all of America, so I think it would be pretty easy

to make a case. Maybe. Maybe he wasn't entirely wrong. Well, okay. All right, but... You tell me where to take him, and we'll take him there. I just... I like the idea of the White House. I don't know about you all, but I think it could be fun. I don't know, maybe the Pentagon. Why does the color of the house figure into our decision? That was a joke. Oh, it was...

That was actually a joke. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And the skimmer goes zipping along the Gulf Coast, headed towards Washington, D.C. Mary says, oh, wait, okay, there's something else. She squintes her eyes, and little panel opens, and out come a bunch of strombolies. Yes. What a fucking archie comics ending to the... I love it. And Jughead gets his burgers. So how close was that to what you were envisioning for the episode? Yeah, I think a little bit of wrap-up makes sense. That was fairly close.

I knew I wanted to have confrontation. I actually was going to involve a couple more operatives, but then I realized that would have been too confusing and too big. And I really, I wanted to leave it. I wanted there to be a conclusion. I had no idea how it was going to end. I wanted there to be a conclusion. But I wanted it to still be open-ended if we still wanted to

You know revisit these characters in the future so that really went I'm very pleased with how it came out All right good as long as we're debriefing Because the point of this is to you know learn learn stuff I like the fate system I don't think it's gonna be a good fit for Yeah, the show just because the the the way that combat is almost like a negotiation or We're constantly trying to like calculate things with aspects, which I should say right now, we were not especially good stewards of those rules. We did play a little bit Calvin Ball to suit our needs. It's great for gameplay.

It's not so great for like rapid narrative storytelling. Yeah, sure. Especially when it comes to like, if you attack with this, you have, which one do you defend with? That kind of stuff. I think it's good. I think it's good for storytelling. I really do think it's good for narrative. It's just not necessarily what we're, what we're doing. But I had fun. I had fun with it. Oh, I love fate. It's great. Right? Yeah, I think we keep trying some... I mean, obviously, whatever we do next is going to be a different system, and we're still figuring that out. But, yeah, that'll be great...

I'll be back with a different story. Yeah, great work, Dad. That was cool. I liked all your great voices. I worked very hard on voices. Apparently, what was limiting me was just doing one. Just doing one. I needed to do 24. You're too multifaceted.

Yeah, I would just... It's like a diamond with one facet. It was too good for the room. I guess. So I guess that's it? We might have one after credits sequence. Oh, shit, yeah. It's a hospital room and Richard is hanging on to life. He is surrounded by monitors and wires and Martine is by his side.

Sylvain is standing over to the side. The doctor walks in, checks the monitors, looks at her clipboard, looks at Martine, and says he has a very long road ahead of him, but I believe he's going to survive. As a matter of fact, I would be willing to bet he's going to thrive. And she reaches up and flips over her medical ID tag and it has a 24 question mark logo on it.

Maximumfund.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Listener supported. How's it going, everyone? I'm Oliver Wang. And I'm Morgan Rhodes. We have a brand new show on the Maximum Fun Network that we'd love to share with you.

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