The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Ethersea - Episode 11

Episode Date: October 7, 2021

The Infinite Clam: Part Five The crew of the Coriolis approach the anomaly that has trapped them in their current bivalve environ. Amber takes a dive. Devo exercises surprising restraint. Zoox experiences a metaphysical identity crisis. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

Previously, on the Adventure Zone, Ethersea. Exposure to ethereal water has strange effects on everyone. You have this seed crystal and this map, which is essentially like an anatomical diagram of a clam. These green pulses of light are flashing through the doors and windows of the shithouse. Coming from these screw-shaped objects, the Coriolis is getting smaller. Shithouse is regular. Yeah. We're small.

And then there's something at the far side of this room that is bigger than it's supposed to be. This is a ribbon worm. It is coiled all around the far wall of this room. I think I want to try to talk to. No, you always want to try to talk to the thing. So y'all are bugging out? Yes. And the ribbon worm convulses and the window that you were sailing toward.

in an instant gets covered with this thick white webbing, and the worm uncoils from the back wall and starts to dash in the direction of the choreolas. Sometimes you eat the worm, sometimes the worm eats you. Right. We got a big old greasy worm trying to get us. I wish, is this show? It's all show.

It could be. It's starting to feel like it's show. It does feel like it's that, it's a cold open. It's the way we talk to each other. The mask is on. Suddenly it switches from work lights to stage lights, you know. I wish it didn't happen at Christmas as often as it does. Yeah, but hey, but here's what's up.

I wish when I have been like, you have been like, Jayman, give me one of those classic characters. And I've been like, hmm, probably monk with, Fiss of Fury, I wish you have maybe been like, you will mainly be in a submarine. Like most of your fighting will be in a submarine. And I would have been like, do people come on it?

Like, not really, it's mainly giant things that you fight in a submarine. Because I feel like my skills, like if something's like, if a lever is jammed, you know, for the sub, I could definitely hit it extremely hard. Or something was up on a high shelf that like your normal arms couldn't reach.

Justin, I've never played a monk before. None of us have. But do you think if Amper, if we piloted the ship to above a bad, like floating right over and Amber laid down on her tummy, could her arms punch down through the floor of the ship? Even then you're getting into water resistance. I mean, you're the speed of the hitting. There's a hydrodynamic. You can tickle the fish. Yeah.

Well, didn't we? I mean, we were in the air for Flotsam, right? Yeah, for a minute. But there were, yeah, I think, did you not punch any, you know, you did some bad failing then if memory shows. Hey, let's roll initiative, by the way. Oh, oh, oh, real quick. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

If we just play the game. Yeah. By the worm. What's the tooth situation on this bad thing? Oh, ble, boy, boy, ble, boy. We don't know that yet, but it will become apparent. Your boy, Travis rolled a two plus a two. That's a four.

If it becomes apparent, I refuse to. to fight a baby giant worm. Well, we've done it before. 14 for the Zooks man. That's a cool nickname for him. I don't think that's it. We'll get there. How long?

15. Z man feels better if we're gonna do eight. Amber's like leaps to the front, like let me handle this. Let me handle this one. Yes, Amber actually you are first in the order, but before that, we're going to me and Devo, roll for position.

This is not a ship, obviously, that you are in combat with. Well. But so give me a plus speed roll. Oh. You got a 13 to beat. Well, I roll the 8 plus 5 a 13. Yeah, you have the higher speed score here. So I will give you the win.

So you are in position and you get to pick your gambit first. You know what? You know what? Yeah. I'm going to begin escaping. Okay. Nice. We're the size of a mouse.

Yeah, sure. This is like if a mouse saw a boa constrictor and the mouse for some reason thought like, I think I can do that. I think I could take it. Well, most mice don't have broadside cannons, but I will grade you that. Even that, though. I guess they did. Okay, well, the worm then is going to regain ground to try and win the next position rule. that is that is the gambit that they are doing uh the the escape gambit the way that that works is

you begin escaping with one gambit and then the next time you become in position you can escape the encounter okay but i have to win the next position we got to win the next position roll correct uh okay so now we are at the top of the order the first person to go is amber amber just to set the scene again you are in a basically gigantic version of the shithouse there are these weird black screw-shaped things that have burrowed into like everything, only a half-dozen of which seemed to be alive still. You determine that they were organic, but nothing really beyond that. And are flashing this sort of green light from within. This giant ribbon worm, which is, to scale with the room, like a huge 30-foot-long boa constrictor-sized thing.

Even big, I don't think about the restrictors 30 feet long. I said that, but. It's anaconda from the movie Anaconda. Yeah. Except it does want some. It does want some of your tasty shit, you think, just based on how it is swimming toward you.

It has also been sort of shooting out this webbing stuff from its mouth that has been spreading over the room. That is the situation. It is swimming toward you to attack, but you, Amber, with your reflexes, you are able to act first. What do you want to do? Okay, so at this point, could I regain ground as well?

No, gambits are just for pilots to perform. Oh, okay. Yeah, I mean, what would one do in this situation? Talking is a free action, right? Yeah. Talking's a free action, sure. Can we talk about what to do? Is there anything I can do to, here,

is there anything I can do to help us go faster? The, it was attracted to the blinking things. Do we have any things that blinks so that we can, you know, distract it with? Are we closely in those blinking things? Within, yeah, fairly close to one. They're sort of scattered out around the room, so you are within. I want to fire the slug launcher, one of them. Okay.

As a distraction. Sure. Go ahead and make an attack roll. What's this look like, by the way? I don't know that we fired a weapon on the. choreolos before. What's it look like when you, like, are activating one of these things? Is it like a, you know, Millennium Falcon pod thing that you drop down into?

Or is it like an Atari joystick? Yeah, what's it, what's it look like? Oh, man. See, I have such a terrible visual imagination. Like, in my head, it was a big flashing button. That's great. I mean, you, you, you say that, but you also came up with the bladder propulsion system and color tone for the ship.

So I think you've got a stronger eye. I've heard a lazy button. Yeah. That's all they do on Star Trek. They press a button and it fires off photon torpedoes or some shit. It was the last person to you, in addition to having a real 70s aesthetic, the last person to own the Coriolis also had a hard time remembering

with the different buttons and switches did. So this one just says boom, like written on a piece of tape. And in there, it just says, boom. They had to do the same thing for William Hartnell There towards the end of his run on Doctor Who. Go ahead and roll an attack roll. You're rolling plus sensor, which is plus three. So a D20 plus three as you aim the slug launcher

At one of these black screw-shaped objects and fire. So D20 plus 30. Roll good. That's a... Wow, a natural 20. Whoa, holy shit. Extremely good. That's about as good as you can do.

Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. This thing with... To this inanimate object. I'm going to fucking annihilate it. Yeah. I mean, with surgical precision, you watch this screaming white, hot slug

go flying out of the side of the coriolis and perfectly hits this thing. And it explodes in this burst of like green biolumina, goo. And when that happens, it does let out like a bright flash of green light that seems to attract the attention of this ribbon worm and slow its, it was charging directly head-on at you.

But you've managed to sort of slow it down a little bit as it looks to see that you've destroyed these things that's been eating. Well, damn, I thought that would be the canon. Why would you label the slug launcher boom And the broadside cannon shoot Here I'm switching these Is that all right with everybody? Well, just make us say slug

This one and I don't have a marker And we're in a hurry There has to be a marker somewhere She rips off the tape on both the buttons And swaps them back So slug launcher says shoot Broadside cannon says boom This is good because then it's B for broadside

And S for slug Okay, got it I'm confused now Oh, shit. That felt a lot like that scene at Independence Day where Will Smith is trying to figure out the controls of the alien spaceship. And that's good. He turns it upside down. Yeah, that was a lot of something in there.

Very good to me. Okay. Next up is Zooks. Zooks is, I assume, standing near the flashing things, too. I mean, you're standing on the ship. The ship is sort of in the middle of the room now because you guys got cut off while trying to shoot out of one of these windows. So, yeah, I mean, you're in the same position. You could probably get another shot off at one of these flashing things, too, if you wanted.

Well, he wants to fire the, can he shoot the slug launcher? No, no, no, weapons can only be used once per round, but you do have other weapons. Okay, let's just say he got confused and he thought he was shooting the slug launcher, so he pushes the one marked S. Right. And it turns out it affects the broadside. B, that's boom. Yeah. Okay, God damn it.

What have we done? Yeah, you may are about as confusing as possible. So you're firing a Broadside Cannon launch at what? At another one of the flashing things. Okay. Roll a D20 plus sensor plus three. A 13 plus three is 16. Yeah, that's a hit.

Because you didn't crit, I want you to roll damage here. So that's 2D8 plus four bludgeoning damage. Now, the broadside cannon has the reload tag, which means it cannot be used in the next round of combat. Okay, that's seven, six plus one, and then again. Okay, then that's what you rolled. Yeah. So you got seven plus four bludgeoning. That's enough.

It's not quite as clean as the slug launcher shot. It takes out like a decent chunk of the, you know, the wall that this thing was borrowed into. but it explodes also. And now this ribbon worm is getting a little bit frenzied as it sort of surveys the room and sees that there's only four of these things left. It is now the ribbonworms turn, though. Ah, the worm has turned.

The worm has turned. Devo, make a speed saving throw for the ship, please. Is that just a D20 wrong? That's a D20 plus five. 10 plus 5 of 15 That's a tie also And I'm not sure what to do about that one If a creature rolls to save or who's a player's NPC

The Defender wins the exchange Okay, you win the exchange on this one So it shoots out a bunch of these white webs Directly at the Coriolis And it hits the ship And you hear this sort of sickening splattering sound as these white webs are sprayed across the hall of the ship. And it almost sounds like they are constricting a little bit.

Like you hear this sort of groaning metal sound. But with your saving throw, Devo, you know, with a quick tug away from the ribbon worm, you peel away from it. And you definitely take some of this webbing with the choreolas, but you rip it away from the ribbon worm. and you hear it screech in protest. Oh, thank you. As it does so.

Okay, we're back to the position roll. Let's get it going. Devo, this is a big one. So roll D20 plus five. Thank you. 15 plus 5, 20. 30, 20. Yep, that does it.

Okay. That is a success. You are electing to escape then? Yes. Okay, what's it look like? How are you getting out of this room, getting out of this situation? So Devo now knowing that the window is closed off, it drives back under the bunk bed pattern,

and it's like doing kind of a weaving between beds, attempting to, you know, it's a worm, right? So if I can get it to weave after me, it's going to get all tangled up in the beds. Right? So I'm trying to weave my way through the beds to get back to the main entrance slash exit. Okay.

So wait, you're going back out the door that you all came through or you're pushing whatever the closest exit is? Yeah, I'd say it's probably the window you were trying to get through when you were first trying to escape. Then yes, that's what I'm going for. Okay. So you lead this thing on a wild goose chase around the room and peel away from its webbing as it tries this one last ditch attempt to tie y'all up.

But with the surprisingly nimble Coriolis manages to get out of. the window that you were first trying to escape from and move on deeper into the clam. For a moment, you see behind you the ribbonworm break through the wall of the shithouse, attempting to catch up to you all. And it is approaching with more speed than you would assume it possesses. and then almost like a rip cord has been pulled this ribbon worm gets pulled back into the shit house

and it gives like one last shriek one last pained shriek and then disappears and is no longer behind you well damn now I'm super curious as to what having there but I'm not going back okay then keep on pressing on pressing on I mean right guys

I mean it's like I don't know what else we do at this point. I would like to know what just ain't the worm, but we should get out. You said it got sucked back in, got sucked back into the shit house, right? Yeah, yeah. Into the shadows. And you cannot say. Now, we should go.

This is what fuck this stuff last time. Come on. Go, go, go, go, go. All right. Hey, excuse me, everybody. I just wanted to say a few words about the beautiful couple. I've known you two for a long. time and you get along like peanut butter and chocolate or you know like like comedy and culture like

maximum fun podcasts actually they're having a block party from October 11th to October 22nd and that's kind of like your party right you have a community of friends and family and max fun has a community of shows and audiences that support them you're having a new start with your life together and Max Fun will be putting out new episodes that are especially welcoming to new audiences. So it's a great time to introduce your friends to your favorite show or jump into one you haven't tried before. Is he still talking about podcasts? And they're setting up a volunteer event where we can help out our local communities.

Plus, maximum fun is going to have games, prizes, episode wrecks, so much other fun stuff. What's wrong with Kyle? Is he okay? Oh, anyways, anyways, sorry for getting kids. buried away there. If it's all right with everybody here, let's all raise our glasses for a toast to the Max Fun Block Party, which you can learn more about at maximum fun.org slash block party, and don't forget to join in on October 11th. Actually, that sounds pretty cool. You all leave the shithouse in your rear view mirror as you go deeper into the clam.

Devo, it doesn't take you long to find that same ridge in the shell that you were following, heading back toward the back of the clam. As you are moving further back here, like the junk starts to fade away. Like there is not quite as much debris just kind of floating around in the water. And another sort of huge geographical feature sort of becomes more present back here. and that is this big pink, fleshy wall that is almost forming like a valley that the Coriolis is now shooting through

between the side, like the shell and this big fleshy thing, which you can see on the map. The tongue, what is that? Well, in a clam, it's called, and according to this anatomical map, it is the foot of the clam, which is basically its tongue. It's what it sticks out

to move itself around the, move itself around the ocean floor. So you are now going through this gulch and maybe another half hour of going through here. You finally reach the back wall of the clam. Basically, this valley terminates at this huge wall. You can see the sort of the mouth, I guess, of the clam still pretty well above you. You are underwater at this point. And And the ridges all seem to kind of meet back here at the back wall. Make an Arcana check for me, Devo. Nat 20.

Holy shit. I think that's, I made two Arcana Nat 20s last time. I know. This is bananas. Devo's good at magic. I don't know what to tell you. Yeah, I mean, you're so good at magic. Like, you are plugged into the arcane sort of flow.

of the ethersea at this point so much that you can tell the source of this power, the source of the compression magic. It is like undeniably strong and it is emanating from below this foot, which is pressed flush to the shell. It's like saying it's underneath this mountain that you can see in front of you. But it is without a doubt the thing that is, making this anomaly that Benefactor Orlean told you about is below there somewhere. I will also give you with a role that that bodacious, there is a another sort of strong

arcane energy signature that feels a little bit more organic. In front of the ship, there is like this big pink, about the size of your ship, like a fleshy sort of node that is hanging off of the back of the shell. There are some sort of like striations in it that are shining light from out of it, almost like a lantern. They're a little bit too tight for you to like, for instance, get the choreolas through. But there is a life signature, a very powerful sort of magical life energy signature coming from this nodule. I want to get just kind of thinking about it. I want to do a quick check to make sure we know where the crystal is. Uh, yeah, you've got it.

Uh, you can say, Amber, you, you, you have it in your, your, your, I mean, that felt right, but I wouldn't be presumptuous. Yeah. Uh, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if it's been a couple weeks, we need to use the crystal to, like, you need to use the crystal to, like, yeah, to give the anomaly form so that you can contain it somehow. Yeah. But right now, it's like trying to, you know. And brother or only, said, if we do that, he'd go with his willingly.

That's the whole. And give us more money. And, well, he would give you more money if you then gave him, whatever it was that you contained. I think... It's no moral choice. Just on the horizon. Mm-hmm.

Oh. The electable moral country. I think we might need to get smaller. Oh, fuck that, though. Really? Well, but see, right now we cannot fit into this thing. We cannot get under this pinky thing. But if we were smaller, if I turn the engine back on,

And then the magic bounces around some more, we get... We're going to be like plankton. Well, eventually we... I don't want to be smaller. If we capture the thing in the crystal, I assume that we will get... Oh, I assume that we will get big again. Assuming makes an ass out of you and Ming.

You know, Ming? Can Zooks do a nature check to see if one of us can fit under it? Thanks. Make a nature check, Zooks. Let's see what you got. Justin, I really like that joke. That was really good. I thought I had a whole story about him, but I mean, I guess he never wants to hear it.

Yeah. He's a taxidermist? Oh, yeah? He does nice, actually nice work. Taste. Yeah, it is. And, you know, it's like, is that a lot? It's not, but, like, you could be forgiven for thinking that.

Was somebody doing something? Yeah. No, no. Not. You got a seven. I will give you this for a seven. Zooks, I think maybe you can just read this anatomical map a little bit clearer. That nodule on the back of the wall is a ganglion, which is like a cluster of like a central nervous cluster for the clam.

Basically, it's a kind of brain sort of situation that can, you know, operate certain motor functions. That is, that's what that is, that nodule thing in front of you. Okay. I share that information. Okay. Thank you. Oh, maybe if we tickle it, then it won't move its pinky thing.

All these technical terms, I'm so sorry. We tickle the clam and it moves its tongue. Foot. Foot. I don't know. I am not a clamologist. Well, I can go out and tickle it if you'd like. Fuck yes.

Obviously Yeah, send that out to tickle the clam Yeah, you nasty burger, tickle that clam All right Zooks, you're going off shit Say it, say it, Griffin I don't want to say it It sucks

Say he's going to do I just decided it's an oyster now Just to sort of The terminology is getting rough Amber's going to go to a room Because I don't really like anything That's happening right now Sometimes Amber just needs a little space

Yeah From the situation Okay. All right, Zooks, you hop out into the water and foot to your way on over to this thing. Yeah. Make a... I have a quiet way. Before he does that, I've been thinking about this now a couple times.

Is there any way, or could we devise a way for us to be, when we go out into the water, to be, like, anchored to the ship, right? because I feel like we've gotten into a couple circumstances now where somebody like swims away from the ship, some shit happens. Yeah. And we can't get them back quickly enough, you know? And I feel like the last time someone swam away from the ship to the clam. I doesn't feel like something we could do in the field.

No, yeah. A rope? A tether? I mean, we could go all a Hail Mary project and use a tether. Yes. if you'll want to use since you are not using the the engines aren't powered right so you're not using the bathysphere we can say that you can use the cable that sort of tethers the bathysphere to the ship if you want to hold on to that zooks while you go into this thing okay cool all right you get up to this thing it is as you get closer to this ganglion it is these like slices in its you know, exterior, fleshy skin that you can see into, there is, there are just like neurons firing inside of it. At the scale that you are at now, you think you could like get in there

if you, you know, really squeezed in. Well, then guess what? Yeah. He's going to squeeze in. All right. Devo and Amber, you see Zooks, or I guess, Amber, if you really are in your room, just Devo. Devo, you see Zooks slide into one of these gaps tethered by this cable. Well, just before he does, he turns back to the ship and does these elaborate gestures thinking he's communicating with Devo, but in essence, since his, you know, digits are just coral, he doesn't get to message across. Sure, sure. But he thinks he's doing something really cool. I'm just going to, I don't know if this is the right time to do it, but I'm ready in action. I've got my hands like on the wheel ready to like throw her in reverse, you know what I mean,

and reel this boy in. Okay. Zooks, you, as you enter this thing, those gaps narrow and then it's just sort of you and the sparking of neurons as you enter into the brain. brain of this clam. And you're like, telepathic link is typically something that you have to, like, effort to engage. But now you are like, you've never swum into the brain of a thing, right?

So it is almost overwhelming as you are buffeted with the thoughts of this enormous, this enormous, this enormous bivalve your inside. In fact, go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw for me, Zooks. Shit. Five. Wait, don't I have the thing? Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Wait, just a moment. Doesn't he have the thing? I haven't used the thing where I can re-roll, right? From something from Devo? Inspiration. I don't think you have Bartick inspiration right now. You know, Daddy, you should have checked it on your character sheet. If you do have it, there's a little spot where we can keep track of it.

So nobody can refute you in the future. Yeah, right now. You check for inspiration? The last time Bartic Inspiration was used, I believe, was for Amber, which she used on the repair. Oh, okay. Yeah, I have all of my dots. Zooks, you are, you are panicked by this overwhelming, like, wave of thoughts as you swim into the central nervous system of the clam. And you take five points of psychic damage.

May I use? I want to cast a spell. I want to cast speak with animals. Okay, yeah. I'll take the five damage, but just, I mean, this seems like a time to use it. Yeah, I mean, if not now, then when? Okay, go ahead. You're doing okay.

You're doing okay. You're kind of a tank, too. I mean, you're a war for, you're made of metal and coral. I'm made of paper and dreams. And teeth. Okay. You cast speak with animals and go and make that wisdom saving throw now with advantage because now like it's not just impulses and instinct that you are being buffeted by. It's, uh, it is words and you know those.

Oh my God. That's a critical failure. Oh my God. But you got advantage. It's a nine. Okay. Okay. Here's.

Here's what I will. offer you, Zooks. You feel that panic again. And you feel like you have this splitting headache. But you see like a way forward. You see a way to categorize these thoughts that are coming at you.

But in order to sort of do that, you realize in order to form this sympathetic link with this thing, it's not going to be a one-way street, you will be able to, you know, understand it and process these thoughts a little bit and communicate with it, but it is going to be able to access you in a way that maybe you are not accustomed to. But that's love, isn't it? Gosh, that's beautiful.

That's clam love. Thank you for that for minor, Travis. We got a thing we call clam love. All right, I have a question for you. On the spell, it says wisdom, save two. When you cast speak with animals, they have to

make a wisdom save, right? No. Okay. No, I don't think so. Animals aren't particularly wise. That wouldn't be very thrilling. Yeah, no. It's, we speak with animals is a you thing. Like, it grants you the ability to speak

and comprehend the language of beasts. Yeah. So it's not something you're casting on them, it's something you cast on yourself. Okay, so Zooks thinks Um, calm down. I am a friend. You know this to the foot? Never mind. I'm not seeing any of this.

I found a magazine about horses. I love that from our perspective, you're reading a magazine about horses in Amber's place, and Diva just has his hands on the wheel, realizing he has no way to communicate with Zooks. I don't know what's happening in there. Maybe there will be a tug on the table. Amber comes out. and talks to, Aaron comes out because she's bored.

She finished your magazine that she found. She stares for a long time, and maybe she sneaks up on Divo, so he didn't notice she was there. Sorry. Sorry, I was just feeling a little tense. Yeah, what's he doing? He went in, I thought he was going to, like, poke it. And he went inside of it and he has been gone. He's in it?

Yes. Oh, man. Well, hey, he had a good run. Do you have anything you want to say about him before he head out? I don't know how to get Zy enters of the Tazer back. Oh, well, yeah. We can disconnect it on our end. We got to head out here.

We don't want to be next, right? Man, I have a- Seems like a good dude, though. Come on. On a different note, have you seen my horse? magazine anywhere? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I left it in the, um, I left it,

it's in the Ambris place, but that kind of means it's mine. So you want to go ahead, we should take off. He's dead, right? He's only been in there about two minutes. How long does it take to be fully digested

by a clam? That's not, find out. That's not, that's not, I could do that. What? That's like it's,

uh, brain? Not its belly. He's in its brain? I'm sure he's, fine then. Can you think, please? Let's go. But you said digesters. The brain does not digest. Well, something's bad's happening. I don't know what brain's version of digested. You know what? I've digested a good book before. This is a good point. Do you have me instead? You know what I mean? Metaphorical or not, we should head out. This sucks. I think we can give him at least five more minutes.

All right. I'm set the timer. And she hits the big button labeled timer. And a cannon A cannon fires off into the wall of the... What is this? The depth charge. All right. Back inside the brain. Zooks.

You... I just want to say, this is really cool inside here. I'm saying it's a little bit. He's kind of just floating around. It's like that scene in Interstellar, you know? It's too many pop calls or references. We should be forger. It's like fantastic.

Voyage. No. More like what I. Donald Pleasence. It's like fantastic Mr. Fox. Yeah. It's a little slow. It's like Mr. McGoriam's Wonder Empore.

I mean, then I haven't seen it. Zooks, this, this, it's like you are in the middle of, like, a crowded room. But then one by one, the voices start to mimic one another until there is just sort of one voice speaking. And finally, you hear it say is someone there?

And yes, I guess, if you want to get metaphysical, I don't know. There's kind of, yes, I am here. My name is Zuchs Anthelae, and I am so tickled to meet you. What is your name? Are you inside or outside? Um, I am in. inside a brain, which I assume is yours. It would be wild if it wasn't, Dad.

When you say that, obviously they can't hear this conversation, but when you say that, Amber and Devo, the clam moves a little bit. But even that little bit of movement is enough to sort of rock shit around in here. The foot lifts up for just like a few feet and then slams back down, sending up like a wave of dust that kicks up into the water. Zooks, you hear this voice say, my brain? Yes, at least I think it is. I see all these ideas and flashes and these really pretty ganglia. I, uh, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, this is, this is, this is one of the coolest experiences of my life.

Are you food? No, no, mm-mm, no, no, no, no, no, I've had some experience with food, mostly mushing it, apparently, according to my crewmates, uh, but no, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm a friend. A friend. Yes. Yeah, I, uh, I, um, I, I, made my way. in here to get familiar with you. Very

empty. And then that word just sort of resonates around this chamber. Make another wisdom saving throw. You're doing so well with that. Dirty 20. Oh yeah.

Yeah, that'll do. It takes you a couple seconds, but you manage to focus the voices back into one voice. and you find yourself getting a little bit more comfortable with like this thing's panic and you know figuring out how to not lose communication with it so you stay in control here and the voices stop saying saying that word stop saying empty and the clam says I'm very different I don't know you're

I mean, aren't we all? I mean, look at, can you see? Do you have any idea what I resemble? I mean, I've got like a coral head and, you know, I think, I don't know about different, but I think you're amazing. When you ask this thing, if it can see, you start to feel this panic wave come on again. But then when you say that it's amazing, it stops. you get the impression that asking this thing questions that a clam might not even know how to answer.

Like, for instance, questions about sight is enough to send this thing into sort of an existential panic. So with that dirty 20, I will also give you that you need to be careful not to ask this thing questions that a clam would have literally no way of knowing how to conceive of. Let me say this. Yes. you are different but different is remarkable there is nothing

bad about being different different is just fascinating and you are absolutely fascinating but why do you feel empty me you it says

and in this moment this like sympathetic link is so powerful that you feel like you are also the brain of this clam and you feel like you have motor control of its body in this moment. You feel this vastness, this infinite expanse. inside of it like it is inside of you. And you feel all, you feel an entire ecosystem sort of floating around inside of you and feel the immeasurable wrongness of it all.

And you feel the hinge of its shell and you feel the foot. It takes you a while to get there, but you can, you can feel it like it is your own. Is it safe to say that Zooks is able to do this because he has experience dealing with souls that gave him life? You, I don't think at this point it's safe to say anything. This is, you've spoken to animals before. You have never had this where you have almost become the animal. And in this moment, like, they're the, The division between Zooks and the clam is like indiscernible.

You're being John Malkoviching the clam. Somewhat, yes. If Zooks has that much control, I think he's going to make it move the foot. Okay. And like take a couple of steps. Well, it's just like it's tongue. Yeah. When I say foot, it's a huge fleshy tongue.

in the clam. Yeah. Yeah. That it can stick out of the clam to move itself. So for all intents and purposes, it is a, it's an enormous tongue inside of the clam right now. Okay. That's even more disturbing than. Oh, yeah.

Sure, sure, sure. Yeah. I think he's going to use that to make it move away from whatever it is it's covering up. Yeah. And I think that would be with a big squotch, squash, squash kind of thing. Yeah, Devo and Amber, you see this big pink fleshy mountain lift up off the floor, which kicks up another sort of cloud of debris. And it forms a gap that is surprisingly tall, like definitely tall enough for you to get the Coriolis under.

And from underneath it, you actually see that dust cloud that it kicked up, get sucked back. in very quickly by this just bright white, very slowly, like, oscillating light that is coming from deeper inside of this basically like cave almost that has formed here. Can we reach it with the tether still intact? I mean, yes. Okay, you could get down to the mouth of the thing, right? You could get down to this cave entrance, but, you know, how deep you can go into it. You do not know.

Okay. Well, then I'm going to head towards the cave. Okay. And when we get close, who retract the tether. I can enter a cave, right? So the tongue was covering some kind of cave, right? Yeah, I mean, the tongue was covering the floor of this clam. which now you can access.

So if the tongue lowers back down with us in there. It will crush you. Okay, then I'm not going to retract the cover. I was going to say, that would be an ignominious end. Is that how that words pronounced? Ignominious? Sure. None of this is.

Ignoramus. Let's just move into position so we can get a better look at what it was covering. Okay. Zooks, you feel a ship, fly down the, the ridge of your shell, uh, down toward, uh,

the base of, of your shell, uh, which is fucked up and weird. Um, you hear the voice again, Zooks. Uh,

and it's becoming less monosyllabic, I guess. Uh, and you hear it say, are you a clam as well? I feel like one. I feel like one now. but no, I am a brinar.

I'm sort of a living construct, made of coral, and what was it you said, dreams? So I'm kind of different, too. When you said dreams, you felt that sympathetic link weakened just a little bit. and outside in the ship you see the foot lower, just quiver just a little bit alarmingly. I will grant you all this, because I feel like this scene is not going to resolve without it. With the tether to the bathosphere,

there is like, that is, it powers the thing, right? It powers the vessel. I will also grant you all that you can communicate to one another now. Now that Zooks has, like, managed to, like, you know, lasso this bronco. you feel like you can communicate now through the tether. Zooks, if you can hear, we are moving into a position to get the, I don't know, the thing, whatever this thing is from underneath the foot.

So whatever you are doing, keep doing this until we are not underneath it anymore. Can Zooks answer back? You can try. Are you the creatures outside of my shell? Oh, boy. This is Devo and Amber. We're in the choreolos. We, hello.

I'm listening. Okay. Just stay with us, buddy. Okay, we're going to get you out in just a second. Boop, whoop, whoop, boop. Oh, shit. Yes, Amber, I know the timer, but I'm talking. Oh, dang, though.

Sheesh. Yes, but I'm talking to Zeus. Just when it was getting good. All right. Come on. So, Griffin, can we see the singularity? Is it a black hole? You can see where the light is coming from.

It's coming from a fissure in the ground. FI. That's a very confusing word to use in our undersea adventure game here. But it is like a crack. in the ground you can't necessarily tell the scale of it because it's like you know pretty well in this this cave but that white light is coming from a crack in the ground deeper in the cave so amb yeah why until you take the crystal and you swim down and you get it yeah yeah it seems good get things moving all right okay i'm gonna get my vapor suit on sure and uh head on out i mean

obviously, but I'll go ahead and say it because I know you, your sneaky DM tricks. You'll try to trip me up. How are you positioning the choreolas? Are you getting any closer or are you going to make Amber, you know? I'm getting as close as I can without like pulling on the tether. Okay. What I will grant you then is you can get over the fissure. So it's just, just below you.

And now that you're in this position, I think the cable is pretty taught. I don't know that you could necessarily go much deeper in here without yanking Zooks out of the brain of this thing, which like after your conversation with him, you don't know what that would mean for Zooks at this point. But this crack in the ground that this light is emanating out of is, is too small for the choreoless to fit through. But seems like Amber, you think you might be able to get down there. A lot of spulunking in this episode. It's spulunking after spulunking after spulunking after spulunking. So I could get, I could swim down to Zooks.

So here's what I see, right? We have the thing hanging above that Zooks is in, and then a line going down to the Coriolis, and then underneath the Coriolis, further down, is the crack in the bottom of the clam. That the light is going to... Coriolis is between you and Zooks, if you go down. I feel like this is the best shot I have

is to keep heading towards the crystal. Oh, yeah. And use the cable to, like, you know, pull myself along. Well, the cable is going back up. Right. Actually, Griff, paint the scene again because I feel like the geography of this is so complex. What should they be envisioning? To sort of paint the geometry here to give you a better, you know, jumping off point, Amber, you all are at this point, the Coriolis is inside of this.

I keep saying cave. The ceiling is the fleshy tongue of this clam and the floor is the shell. outside of this is that nodule that Zooks swam into back, you know, several hundred yards that the cable is leading to. The fissure is directly beneath the ship now inside of this, this quote unquote cave, and it is immediately below you. So we got three levels, right? The top is where Zooks is. The middle is where the ship is, and the bottom is where the fissure is. Yes, correct. Okay. And it's all in water.

Is there, where's the water? You're all in water. Yeah, you're well. You're deep under water at this point. Got it. I'm going to swim down into the fissure to try to reach the anomaly. Okay. You're putting the crystal.

I'm assuming you have like a dive bag or something, right? That the. A fanny bag. Yeah, right? Like this is a, it's a dive fanny pack. This crystal you can tell is like a salt crystal almost. So you don't, you know, you don't know how that's going to go if you just like expose it to water right now.

So, yeah, you tuck it in your dive fanny pack. That's, that works for me. Could it be a finny pack? Oh, fuck, that's so good, dad. All right. Amber, how are you feeling right now? Because this is, I want to stress diving into the bottom of a clan to go into a narrow crack that is wide enough for your body

to get down and not much wider than that, it seems like it would trigger a certain amount of fear in the average person. Yeah, for the average person, you're absolutely right. She's fine. I mean, whatever. I mean, this is not that big of a deal for Amber. Like, she's done waste of dumb or shit than this.

She was younger probably, but, like, I don't know, it hasn't occurred to her that she should be freaked out about that. Okay. Um, Amber, you are this pinpoint of green light that exits out of the bottom of the Coriolis and swims this gap downward toward the crack in the ground. And from outside the ship, we see that pinpoint of green light just vanish as you swim into the fissure. Zooks, you feel you feel Amber swim into your shell. It's almost like

it's painful almost. It feels like a it feels like a dental operation like something is not supposed to do that. And I want you to make a wisdom saving throw for me to see to sort of maintain composure. Can I help? Um, I have, I, I, I, if you can tell me how you could help with this role.

Yes, I can. I have a spell called calm emotions, you see. Oh, okay. Tell me what that does. So, uh, I can suppress strong emotions, uh, in, in a group of people, uh, they can choose to make a Christmas saving role or they can choose to fail. Um, and if it fails, then I can suppress, an effect that is causing someone to be frightened. Okay. Or I can nullify, just basically make them feel not emotions, make them indifferent about creatures that they were hostile towards. So let's use the game mechanics here and say, because Zooks, you are of two minds, so to speak, I think you do need to save and see if, see if you fail against this.

So make a, make a, we'll ignore that I will be a benevolent. DM and say, ignore that dog shit 2 plus one wisdom saving throw that you just rolled and do a charisma saving throw to see if this calm emotion spell has an effect on you. And just to be clear, Travis, you want Zooks to fail this roll. So the spell takes effectant. Okay. So rolling low would be good for Zooks right now as you make this charisma saving throw. In that case, look for a 20 or in two. That's a three minus one. Great bad roll. That's a wonderful bad roll. It's a wonderful bad roll. finally paid off. Way to not come through in the closed. I want to thank all the people that made this possible.

Sure. That's a really successful failure. Thank you so much. I think the way that you know to do that, Devo, is as Amber, like, enters the Fisher, like, everything shakes and groans. And, you know, you can't necessarily, you're not in direct communication with Zooks right now, but through that line, what do you, what do you, all your magic is verbal, right? What do you do? What do you do to calm emotions?

This is for good. This is the thing that is happening. This is some things that needs to happen. She is here to help. There is some things that is not supposed to be. Basically, it's just I'm going for a really, almost like ASMR, like, monotone. You know what I mean?

Like, I'm trying to counteract what would be kind of spikes of emotion with a really, like, low level, like, everything is all right. This is what? is supposed to... Tingles! You're getting such tingles. The blushing is going to remove the things that is hurting.

But it's itchy. It's so itchy. Yes, but this is like the soren in the paw. This is not supposed to be there. And when it is removed, it will be better. We are fixing, and sometimes fixing something hurts, but this is for the best. All right. just to hurry because it really, I want to get back to normal life. Yes, of course. Just stay calm.

And that slows the shuddering. And Zooks, you feel a little too at ease maybe. I don't know that you are fully cognizant of the fact that you are the Brian R. Zooks occupying the brain of this clam right now. Like, I think that that, I don't know that you know that or can remember that right now, which is good for the people outside because you have not brought this cave crashing down on top of them. I must not fear. Fear is the mine killer.

Fear is a little death that brings total obliteration. I get another of our ongoing viral marketing for Dune. That we've done viral Dune marketing. Thank you to Warner Rothers, obviously, for the hugely buffets. And Dennis, the director guy, and, well, Tim. Chalem. Tim Chalemi. Tim Chalem.

Tim Chalem. Timmy Chalz. He requests for him. Devo, make a perception check for me. I will do that for you. That's an 11 plus 3, 14. The bridge is exposed now, right? the Coriolis Bridge, you know, pops in and out as you need it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You see what you think is a crack in the glass viewport of this bridge, and the crack starts to spread and branch, but maybe with another one of these soft flashes coming from the fissure, you realize that it is not a crack. It is some of that white webbing from the ribbon worm. Uh-huh. And it is slowly spreading down the front of the, of the bridge here, and trying to inch its way into the Coriolis.

Well, shit. I'll leave that there for now and jump to Amber. Amber, you are free diving into this abyss. and that is the only word that could describe this because it feels like the deeper you go, the closer you are getting to the source of this light, but also the slower you are moving and also the bigger and wider this chasm is getting. And there is debris now sort of all around, scattered all around. And some of it is just sort of floating weightlessly.

Well, I mean, I guess everything, most things float weightlessly in the water when they float, but, but they are at scales that, like, does not make any sense whatsoever. There is a ship, like an old, rusted, you know, hollowed out ship that is smaller than you. And there's an anchor that is much, much, much larger than you that is sort of burrowed into the, the crack here. You are diving down through this debris, and you feel the hairs on the back of your neck, stand up. I guess I'll kind of like look around to see if I can see anything.

Make an investigation check for him. 13. Okay. You have to slow down a little bit. You have to like slow down your free dive into this, into this crevasse to get your bearings. With an investigation check of 13, you can't see anything right now out of the ordinary. Um, but you know because of who you are, what is close by to you. And then there's a flash of green light.

Yeah, it's my fucking fists. Extending, almost instinctually. And the flash of your arms extending are met with the flash of a massive, injured, link shark that appears just feet in front of you and you just manage to catch its jaws with your

ghostly hands as it crashes into you. Griff? Yeah. Now she's scared. Maximumfund.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Audience. Audience

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