The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Ethersea - Episode 13

Episode Date: October 21, 2021

With their first proper mission under their belt, the crew of the Coriolis attempt a series of negotiations with mixed results. A night at the Cloaca forges new friendships, while morning at the Gills forges new ... enemyships.Additional music in this episode: "Piano Abstract" by Ubik https://freesound.org/people/yewbic/; and "Intense Horror Music 01" by Magmi Soundtrack https://bit.ly/3aXUcSt Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

Previously, on the Adventure Zone, Ethersea, another noise that you hear coming from Amber's place is like a very quiet and pathetic whimpering. Ugh, it's urgent. He is going to attempt to transfer the magic that is trapped in the engine out of it by using his body as a conduit. Stand back, and if this goes very poorly for me, I don't know, tell Amber and Zuchs that I said goodbye. Now you can see the blink shark.

I shut off my vapor suit. Whoa. Are you sure? Yeah, I'm pretty sure, yeah. I swim at it. It wraps its jaws around you and it's about... I slapped the button to activate my vapor suit. One less, you know?

One last. I envied you, but you're empty too. No, what do you mean? What do you mean? What do you mean about that? Yeah, I'll use the crystal on the thing. I'm just storing it basically in my finny bag.

You are caught in a fountain of debris that goes firing away from the back of the clam. And in a very familiar fashion, you see these four black spiraling eggs blink. and teleport out of sight. And then you're thrown from the clam as well. The pressure in the airlock of the Coriolis regulates and the door slides open. And Devo, you see Amber and Zooks walk back onto the ship, both looking a bit worse for wear.

I don't want to put words in anyone's mouth or face-based coral hole. Thank you. How is... Oh, I thought you were talking about Devo. Okay, all right. Stick that in your coral hole. How's everyone feeling?

I'm going to say Devo's feeling pretty drained. It has been a long day. I will grant you that. Also, you channeled horrible magic through your body. A shrunk and then grew my bones. Yeah, yeah. Like you do. Yep.

Zooks is confused, maybe a little bit disconnected, just kind of... the whole thing with the clam brain and all the stuff the clam said to him in his head is really got Zook's off balance. I think he's just kind of with his coral-based eye holes, he's just kind of staring off into space, not really connecting with anything or anybody. I love that in the future, Zeus can say with a straight coral face hole, Um, well, I'll never forget the thing that that magic clam told me, and it changed my life forever. Uh, Amber? Unless you're rolling an insight check on Amber, she seems like she's doing real good. Okay. Say I, the DM, rolled a Nat 20.

Did you really? I'll roll. Okay, I'll roll an insight check. I don't know whose modifiers I'm using. Use mine. They're really good. Do one of the other. That's a seven. Seven. She's doing good. That's great.

Okay. You all are sort of wrestling with your various things. At Zooks and Amber, you look around and see that the interior of the ship is slightly worse for wear. First of all, this chamber is like wet. When you walk inside of the like little compartment here leading to the airlock, like, it got flooded and drained and it's still like pretty deep. in here. Amber, I think seeing that, your eyes immediately shoot to Amber's Place just to see if

everything's looking okay there. And the door into Amber's Place has a few, like, holes, like, sort of smashed into it. Now, I see that you are looking over at Amber's Place. We will discuss everything else in the moment, but first, I want you to let you know, because I think that honesty is important. I did go into Ambers Place. But, but for a very good reason, the spit that came out of the ribbonworm was in Ambell's place. And I went in there primarily to make sure that the ribbonworm spit was not touching anything. Also, because urchin was in there and was dying. Well, wait, to save urchin?

No, primarily to make sure. that your stuff was not being touched. But you did say virtue. Yes, but this was more of that was accidental. I've had a rough day, so I'm going to grant you temporary clemency. This one will let slide. Thank you for your honesty. I do appreciate it.

Oh, also I'm... Ever. Say it. Ever? No. You say too fast. I don't trust you. Never.

Never. All right. No, that's fair play. Never. Never. Ever. Ever. Again.

Again. All right, we're good. I also made the magic bomb out of his shrinking magic and I sheltered at Ziklam. That also happened while you were gone? Cool. Did that win or kill us or what happened? I don't, I honestly, I do not know. Is this hell? No, certainly not.

I do not know. I do not think this is hell because nothing is happening, right? If this was hell, there would be, you know, pitchforks and angry, like, eh, kind of fellows. As you say that, the porthole closest to where you guys are having this conversation lights up with bright red light. Oh, no! But then looking at the window, you realize that. the turbines of this makeshift city of Flotsam have kicked on. And from beneath this sort of ramshackle city, a little port opens up, and this very, almost

like featureless, spherical, stark white ship emerges from it. And through the viewport, you can see Benefactor Orlean piloting his personal craft here toward the airlock of the Coriolis. And you actually see him waving at the city at Flotsam as these turbines kick on and send it sailing away from this now like trash strewn clearing that you all are in. And it sort of shoots. Oh, no, I was going to loot it for art. It shoots into the like kelp forest surrounding you and and disappears. I forgot to ask up for art, Griffin.

Did they have a lot of good art? Did they have a lot of good art at the flotsam? Yeah. I mean, nothing that they didn't probably tear up and then nail together to like make a, you know, to frame up a window or something. Okay. Okay. And then there's a chime at your airlock noting that he has, he has requested to dock at the Coriolis. Yeah, Deva flips the switch.

But I don't know. Yeah, we can say it's a switch. Yeah, we don't have to like far escape it. Like there's a big. lymph node that you have to honk in order to, okay, yeah, so the airlock, again, sort of goes through that repressurization, and the door opens, and there is Orlean,

who, like, immediately makes a beeline to the porthole and looks out, like he's looking for flotsam, and he turns back, and he says, we probably shouldn't linger around here for too long, because, wow, are they going to be pissed off when they realize I've been? been messing with their brains for some time now. Yes, I imagine that they are going to be very pissed off at you. Yeah.

Like, yes, absolutely. So it seems like you then have a lot of reason to want this to go smoothly and quickly, yes? You always, Devo these days, and I'm not saying that I don't not admire this about you. you take it to 11 basically from the get-out. Olin? Yeah. I'm very tired.

Oh, sure. And it, don't interrupt me again. Whoa. It has been a long day. And myself and my friends, Amber and Zuxia, were put in a lot of danger to get the things that you wanted.

And there's a part of, of me I want you to know that you've seen the power of this, what did you call it, this anomaly? Yes? Yeah. And I don't want to give it to you. But there's a bigger part of me that thinks that what most likely will happen is you will end up destroying yourself with it. And this would be delicious to me.

And so you give us the money. and you give us the box of trinkets that you collected from the trash pit, and you can have the anomaly. That was not part of the deal. What are you going to do with a big box of trinkets? Well, I know that you want it, and so now I want it. Make a, I mean, it almost sounds like you are intimidating him, or trying to, at least. If you are trying to change, alter the deal, I want you to roll. Why don't we make this a contest?

Because his, his, I mean, his scores are going to be pretty intense also. Okay. So you're a rolling intimidation against his, we'll say against his insight. 17 plus 4.21.

You are on the hottest streak, I think I've ever. All right, let's see. Yeah, all right. Yeah, that 21 wins. He smiles. Okay But first I want you to show me That you actually manage to capture this thing

And Diva looks at Amber Yeah She's looking through her bag No No no no For the finny pack Or you're looking through the finny pack Looking through the finny pack for

Oh okay Amber when you unzip the fennie pack The crystal is not there But then you realize that nothing is there. And then you realize that you can't see the bottom of the finny pack. And then you realize that this finny pack is enormous on the inside. That somehow this anomaly, when you enclosed it inside of this new container,

did basically the same thing to this container that it did to the clam. And now your Finney pack is massive on the inside. An infinity finny pack. An infinity pack. Please, this is going to be the good name for it. But the crystal is not in it as far as you can tell. Well, hoss, goodness and bad news. Which one you want first?

I'll take the bad news. That's my style. Rock's gone. Oh, no. Rock's gone. It's what? Your rocks gone. What could possibly be the good news?

What? I got a big bag. You know what? Now that I say it, I could see how that's not really exciting for you. Give him the bag. What? Give him the bag. No, it's my bag.

It's my infinite bag. He's going to give us a lot of money. You know, people have. pay a lot of money for an infinite bag. He is going to pay a lot of money for an infinite bag. Yeah, but aren't they going to pay us to take him back? Yeah, to Founders' Wake, isn't that our mission? We're going to do this too.

Okay. The church is going to pay us to bring him back. All right. And he is paying us for the anomaly, which is now in your bag. So you give him the bag. He gives us the money. It's my bag. Okay.

But you give it to him. I understand that. Yes. This is why I'm saying, you give it to it. If you had asked you before, I opened it, I would have said, yes, absolutely, here's my bag, no problem.

But now we've got it, I've got, this is like a whole new thing for me. You know what's funny? As I've been looking for kind of a way to distinguish myself, and right now, I feel like it might be like,

oh, Amber, she's the lady with the huge bag. So not Ambia. I know. You know Amber, the one's the huge bag. She slayed the blinks sharks. She's placed the, she killed all the blink shark. No, no, not that, Amber. The one with the big bag. Yeah, anybody can kill a blink shark.

Oh, my God. May I see the bag for a second? First, just a nickel. You may be hold its wonders. Are you kidding? Step right up. See, incredible big bag. Here, here, here's a nickel.

Here he goes, Zins take a peek or his to get in there, right? You can duck your head in. What do you think? I don't, I don't see anything. I can't see anything, Amber. It's very, very dark. Listen, Orlene, when she gets like this, you should just give her a nickel. There's no nickel.

You must have something that's just like a nickel. It's fine. No, you know what? It's fine. The first one's free. Once he's to look in the bag, you're just going to want another hit. Yep, I just can't see anything at all. Get your head out the bag, Zook.

Oh, okay. Sorry. All right, take a peek. He dips his head in for like two seconds and pulls it out and says, okay, this is useless to me. So you can keep this incredible bag. Hey, listen. Yeah. I love that you're going along with it.

I was not seeking your permission. Let the record show. Fantastic. So if you will just give us our money then and the box of trinkets, then we can part ways. What am I giving you money for? Oh, you said if we went and we collected the anomaly in the salt crystal and brought it back here, then you would give us money. And this is what we have done to the letter.

This feels bad to me. I mean, listen, we had to get the amomily, and I got a cool-ass bag out of it. Like, I feel like we're all winners here. You know what, you are right. We will take half of the money you promised and the box of trinkets. Damn, that's charitable. Devo, make a, make a wisdom saving throw. Oh, that would be a natural one.

Goodbye, hot streak. He looks at you and you are reminded in that, in that moment. He, like, he just whispers something that is inaudible to the other two. And frankly, it's inaudible to you too, but you know that he has whispered something under his breath. And you feel so small and like a child. And you remember like the one or two times during your tutelage where you tried what you are doing right now. You tried to talk back essentially to an elder orator. and you remember how small you felt in those times too,

and you do not feel emboldened anymore to push your luck like this. And he shakes his head and says, I'm going to go now here. He reaches up to his coat and he pops off a lapel pin with the insignia of benevolence, the hand-holding scales. and he tosses it to you, Amber, and he says, give that to the hand of guidance and let her know that you found me, that I'm fine. I mean, tell her whatever you want, frankly. I'm just, I'm not ready to go back yet.

But as you have pointed out, I need to get going before the spectral pirates come back. So I take my leave. Wait, hold on. Don't interrupt me. Thank you. You know he did that. He turned it around. I love that.

Parallelism. He says genuinely, thank you for saving me. I was in a tight spot and I am not too proud to admit that I could not get out of it on my own. So. Zooks points his crossbow. at his head. Why? I mean, he's right up next.

He's got, I mean, like the bolt is an inch away from his head. Why? Oh, man. And then asks Amber and Devo, is this okay with you guys? What, you inting him, snuffing him out like a human candle? Is that I mean? Okay with us? Are we just going to let him walk out?

Aren't we supposed to take him back there? Oh, man. Nothing personal against you, but... What were our marching orders? The marching orders were to bring him back or his body, wasn't it? Oh, man, I should have... Hey, listen, this aside, we've got to start writing things down. Yeah.

Agreed? Agreed? Should we get, like, a voice recorder or something to keep notes? We should... Hey, what do you want? What? Hey. A, Devo

Do you think we should let him go? You want to bring him back? Let him go. Okay. Over's the crossbow. Orlean, I want you to know the next time.

If I see you before you see me, I am going to kill you before you have a chance to open your mouth. Do you have an extra pin? Because I didn't get a pin. You see him kind of like nervously twitching his fingers as if he is deciding whether or not to counter these incredibly aggressive actions

you all have shown him. But instead he just shakes his head and he turns and gets in the airlock and opens it and looks back at the three of you and it takes a breath as if he's going to say something. And then he just presses the button and the door shuts and his plain white little ship floats away out into the kelp forest and he is gone. Devo begins to cry. Devo, I want you to say, I want you to know. I'm real proud of you. That was pretty grown up, honestly.

I'm not sure I would have done it. I am not the grown-up. Well, you acted like a grown-up. It was a mature thing to do. I would have popped the one right in the eyeball. I am a child playing games. Hey, if you're a child playing a game, I don't buy that, but, you know,

child's won anything to do their way. Kappa, you didn't do that. You did the big boy thing. You let him walk away, let him fester in his own petressants, you know. That's good. That is good. That is a great line. Yeah, yeah, I was proud of you.

Hey, hey, I don't think I'll ever, I have so much pride for you. I'm worried that I won't be able to carry it on my purse at all times. Did you hear that? Yeah, I'm worried I won't be able to carry all the pride I have for you at all times on my person. Devo. Yeah, Devo smiles a bit. I was worried about it until I got an infinite bag. Yeah, put it in the bag.

I'll put the pride in the bag and your sadness in the bag. It's in the bag, baby. Come on, let's go. This place sucks. I'm going. When they turn away, Devo smile vanishes. In your selling state, Devo, you walk back. up to the bridge and when you sit down at the helm, you notice that like on the, I mean,

whatever the equivalent of the dashboard is, you see that there is a small, like, the size of your hand, almost origami flower made out of sheet metal and scrap metal. that is sitting there waiting for you. So Devo sees this and now has a deeper smile, one that actually touches his eyes, and then he starts the engine and turns the ship towards Founders Wake. Let's turn in our crushbone belts here. You all have made your way back to Founders Wake.

Where you went was not particularly far from the city, so it is a quick trip back. and you find the God, I forget what you guys' parking spot is. I need to write it down. I feel like it's close to 1A. I don't know. I'll go back through the archives,

but you find it quickly and get docked. After a short trip up the Crystal Ascension, you arrive at the conservatory and make your way into the headquarters of the Benevolent Parish. And once again, the receptionist there, just like as soon as she sees the three of you like pops up and darts into the back room

without even saying anything to you and moments later the hand of guidance walks out and smiles and then she looks and sees that Orlean isn't with you and then she kind of frowns and says oh oh dear

did you not did you not find him or he's alive Here's his pen. Give us the money, and we will go. Where was he? He was inside a giant clam, okay? All the story in the book.

Yes. It's your basic boy meets clam, clam swallows boy. Boy becomes super captain of a collection of broken down ships. And then three weary travelers get sucked into the clam. And then they fight ribbonworm. And one of them mind melds with the clam, and then they fight a race of beasts that everyone thinks is dead. And then they put the... I'm lost in my own story.

Just give us the money. And then they wake up, and it was just a dream. God, your lips to God's ears. She says, but he seemed okay? Did he say what he was doing there? Yes, he was busy being an asshole. And this was taking up a lot of his time. Honestly, he said, tells the hand of guidance that I will not be coming back

because my efforts to become even more of an asshole than normal are just really filling up the old schedule. Yeah. It will be some time before I can take a break from being such a massive asshole. He's paraphrased. There is an elderly woman with, that is sort of like, hanging out with a group of younger parishioners here and all of those younger parishioners are looking at you,

Devo, with their mouths hanging open. Yes, can I help you? Yes. And the other woman, like, sort of ushers them away out. Oh, I'm sorry, Dolores. You don't like hearings that Benefactor Alina's an asshole. Just massive asshole, a macehole. Where are you going?

She's, like, is, she's sprinting out of the room at this point. She seems good. Is she good? No, she is not well. And that's probably not great for her constitution. Yeah, I would, I would, yeah, Devo, that wasn't nice. It's been a long couple days. I understand.

I don't want to complicate things. Here, she reaches into lockbox underneath the receptionist desk, and she hands you five lucks. and she says you all did quick and excellent work the parish will keep you in mind the next time that we require the services of a contractor and so maybe it was so quick and efficient

bonuses in order you can negotiate that ahead of time man it's not going to work you can better yourself I feel like our payment has already been quite generous but

next time You know, there will be a fee attached that represents our blossoming relationship. Ooh, gross. This is a gross way to put it. Yeah, I recognize that. Devo, could I speak to you alone for a moment? Not far alone. I just, I still want to be able to seize them.

Okay. And she sort of gestures toward the end of the room that those young parishioners were just hanging out in. And she kind of whispers under her breath. She says, I know that you are angry. And I also recognize that you're not about to believe a single word that I'm about to say to you. And that's fine. But I still. do need to say it. I understand your resentment, but we can't do anything about what happened to us in the past. And I don't want to see that resentment swallow you up and define the rest of the long life you have ahead of you. I wonder if it would be possible for you to, amidst your resentment, occasionally think back on the good days during your time at the cloister.

Well, I'll tell you, guidance. The problem with being lied to and manipulated is that now, In retrospect, I cannot tell what was a good day and what seemed like a good day because this is how you wanted me to feel. This is the problem that I have. It is not that I hate you. It is that I do not know what is me and what is you. and what is the church and what it is that I want because for so long you and the other teachers only saw me as a vessel to be filled with your ideas and your beliefs and you would do anything

to have me accept those I am afraid of every other feeling because I do not know if they are yours or if they are mine, but my resentment is my own, and this is the anchors that I will keep coming back to to understand who I am, and what fuels me is knowing that I am not you, and I do not want to be only resentment. Yes?

Yeah. But when I see your face and the symbol, and the church it's all that I am pleasure doing business with you believe it or not oh okay are the other two of you still

still in the room yeah um I was believe it or not what I was going to say it's been a pleasure for me as well all right on

okay thanks I gotta go bye Pleasantries. Can I talk to the two of you about benevolence's great blessings? Or I'm just kidding. We don't really do that thing here. Oh, we're not good enough for you? Yeah, I'll join your dumb cult.

Are there refreshments? I think you should leave. Okay. Hey, actually, do you have a pamphlet or something I can take with me? I mean, I can give you a book. of the benevolent. Thank you. Please do that.

Okay. She hands you, like, you know, those tiny New Testaments that they handed out in front of schools for some reason? Uh, she gives you one of those. Okay, I ends up my bag and drop it in. Shh, listen. Listen. There it is.

Thanks, now listen. Listen, folks, at home, that was all Justin. That was Justin's mouth. It was fantastic. Uh, okay. Hey there. I'm Ellen Weatherford. And I'm Christian Weatherford.

And we've got big feelings. about animals that we just got to share. On Just the Zoo of Us, your new favorite animal review podcast, we're here to critically evaluate how each animal excels and how it doesn't, rating them out of 10 on their effectiveness, ingenuity, and aesthetics. Guest experts give you their takes informed by actual real-life experiences studying and working with very cool animals like sharks, cheetahs, and sea turtles. It's a field trip to the zoo for your ears.

So if you or your kids have ever wondered if a pigeon can count, Why sloths move so slow or how a spider sees the world? Find out with us every Wednesday on just the zoo of us, which can now be found in its natural habitat on maximum fun.org. Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You all have gotten paid, not a king's ransom, but enough for a modest Coriolis upgrade or two if you so choose to now stop by. And I do still owe Felix some money.

Yes, you now owe Felix some money. six Lux, which is more than you made on this job. Well, I guess you got free vapor suits and some cash for that too. But it's up to you all. You all are home. The job is done. Eventually, you'll need to sort of report back to the brokerage to report back. But, you know, you've had a long, long couple days.

So I leave it to y'all. It would be cool if you could stick together in wherever you go. but that's my only request. So what do you all want to do? You want to go shopping? You want to go kick it somewhere? And beyond Suks, I would like to posit that perhaps now is the perfect time for us to go get an alcoholic drink somewhere and perhaps food that is not in ration form.

Yeah, we could go to the cloaca if you want to. I think I got some fizzers in there. A fizzam? Do you have a tab there? Tab, tap, tap. Tap, tap. No, I, uh, I, uh, I, I, uh, I just pay as I go. Because I want to, I want to put one of those alcoholic beverages in, in my, uh, mouth hole.

Oh, let's see what happens. Fuck it, right? Yeah, let's go. Yolo. I have something I want to talk to you friends about. Actually, Zook's, uh, I guess it would be yolt. Right? Because Zooks died and then became Zooks at some point, right? So you only live twice? Yolt. What are you talking about? You only live twice? Y-O-L-T!

Why would you bring this up right now? You said Yolo? Yeah, the bartender at the cloaca, Yolo. Oh, okay, I see. This is, I'm a young person, and so there's been a miscommunication here. Yes. All right. Yeah. Okay. Well, we'll just, let's on head on down there and we'll get us some fizzers. And I think I get a bit more jerky in there if you guys are hungry. Oh, okay. That taxidermist is there. I've been wanting to meet the taxidermist.

Yeah, you all head back down to the quite sweaty and fragrant Joshy's knucklerc. and cruise on down to... What a combination of words, Griffin. A delightful choice to be made. Well, fragrant doesn't necessarily mean a bad... No, but coupled with both the word sweaty and knuckle. Yeah. You all make your way into the cloaca.

It is a fairly calm time of day for this particular establishment. You all see through like a window behind the bar, you see Chauncey. in the back room at the griddle, cooking up some stuff. The only other sort of, there's a couple dining underneath a dimly lit lamp. And then in the corner, sitting by themselves is a figure wearing,

like this wide-brimmed hat and large duster, and you just can't see their face. There's a, like a lit, cigar sitting in an ashtray, and they are just sort of sitting in front of them with their hands folded. But that is all that you see in here as you want. Amber, who is this fellow over here? He seems, I don't know, the important, weird, both. Let me think about it. Do I know?

Roll an investigation check. Okay. Sixteen. Plus anything? No clean. They look familiar, but you can't. quite put your finger on it. Well, they look familiar, but I can't clap on my finger on it. Yeah, well.

Let me find out. What do you do? I'll just, uh, I'll just roll up to him. Okay. Hi. Are you there? Gubby, what's, uh, what's your handle? What brings you in?

I usually know everybody like, uh, I am a humble adventurer. back from a promising treasure hunt and I have mini maps and secrets Diva flips his hat off Okay, as you reach forward to flip his hat off

Amber make a dexterity saving throw, please. Okay. Ooh, uh, ten. Yeah, uh, as his face is exposed, he simultaneously springs up from the table and you hear this figure shout, vibe check, and he karate chops you right in the neck

and then lands right behind you on the floor. Yeah. Damn. And he stands up and throws the coat off and it's old Uncle Joshy. And he says, I, you're getting soft. I'm telling you, you look tired. You got to keep your body fresh because you never.

You do not know. You do not know. You do not know. Joshy, if I may, I have future reference. No one who is actually an humble adventurer says, I am an humble adventurer. Like, this is a bad, this is a very bad tale. I may work on me.

Yeah, and most of my stuff went into the costume. Yes. Which was, I think we can all agree, pretty convincing. So that's, let me, hold on one second. He walks over to the wall and pulls down this, like, roll out, like, sheet of paper that has a scoreboard on it. And he marks it. He's like, okay, you're still ahead.

But it's getting pretty tight. So, oh boy. How is everybody doing? Y'all look like an absolute dumpster dump. Thank you. Yeah, it's a weird one. Hey, hey, hey, mark another one up there. Up on the board.

I killed, I killed me one out in the ocean. I found one by itself weird. Honestly, that bit was weird. But killed him with. Are you ready for this? I let him bite me. And then I turned off my suit. Bad.

Let him bite me. And then I turn this suit back on, blue his goddamn head off. Mark it up. You found a blink shark. Are you, are you shitting me or not shitting me? I killed a blink shark. I knew it. I told you.

What did I tell you? I said they're still out there. I can feel it. I've been saying it every day for several weeks, months. Okay, no. It has been like, it's been a few years since we've seen one night. Huh. He's dead now, though.

Mark it! Unbelievable. There was the flashing eggs, but, uh, this is fine. This is fine. Wait, what you? First, Josh, you market? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. He marks it. He marks it. That's not really what. keeping score of, but I feel like if I don't give you points for killing a blink shark. Wait, where are you keeping a score of? What do you think I'm talking about? Oh, when we get each other, when we like, you know.

Oh, no, I met on the blink shark who's killed a blink shark board. It's old and dusty and hangs in the corner of the cloaca. And they keep track of who's killed the most blink sharks. Oh, that's a neat. Okay, that's neat. He walks over to a second scoreboard. A second dusty board. And he puts a markup for you and then looks over at his calling.

You know what it is, Griff? It's a two-sided chalkboard. So he just flips it. He flips it over. And then on this one, he puts a mark up for you, and there's, God knows how many on your side. And then he looks at his side, which is completely empty. And then size and then flips it back over to the more favorable.

I don't know, Josh. I feel like the late this time would be a little bit tough to overcome. I'm going to get out. I feel like it's getting away from you. I'm going to get out there once I finish up my cool gun. That you know I've been working off for a while. I don't know about the good. Yeah, but unless the gun shoots blink sharks and then bullets that kill blake sharks in an alternating fashion, I feel like you're going to be up in a tight spot.

Yeah, okay, back to the eggs, though? Yes. Well, this is, I mean, I just, once you had says that you had fought a blink shark, it occurred to me that the thing screwed into the walls were blinking. and then when we were being spit out, the blinking lights that were in the old houses that we were in, they blinked away. And so I put two and two together. They must have been blink shark eggs, yes.

But. Amber, I'm going to be straight with you. I can't understand a single fucking word this guy says. Yeah, we saw the blink shark eggs. How many? How many? Did she see them? Yeah, you saw them through the window as you were being sort of blasted out.

Or the four, maybe? Four, yeah. Four, yeah. Oh, God. Like four? He says, it's been decades since we've seen a blink chart. Where did you find it? In the clam?

In a giant clam. Well, you just say you'll explain. your journey so you don't have to do it for the third time this episode. He says, You may have killed the last of the blink sharks, Amber. If that thing got stuck in that big clam for, you know, who knows how long. I'm standing right here. What?

Wait, no. Oh, no, I'm not the giant clam. I'm sorry. Go on. Sorry. Yes, go on. I love it. Great.

It's possible to get stuck in there for who knows how. long and those eggs i mean we've never seen one of these things lay an egg before who knows how long they take i hold on he he reaches over to the scoreboard and like clears out a little section of it and then he just makes four big tally marks on it and he turns back and he says i thought they were gone amber but if they aren't next best thing I guess is now we know exactly how many are left

I mean new rule I guess you kill a blinkshot food and drinks on the house tonight um woo yeah we're celebrating

okay can I just can I feel can I take some with me just can I fill up my pack um are you good to carry Anyway, you wouldn't get that, Joshie, but I got an infinite. I got an infinite bag now.

Check it out. He looks inside. To carry inside jokes. He says, oh, you're trying to get an infinite food and drink situation. Yeah, I was trying to Yogi Bear, yeah. I'm sorry. That's all right. Did Yogi Bear have an infinite picnic basket?

No, but that was sort of like his dream that he talked about all. A lot of time. Now I remember it. And the episodes I watched, he used to be like, Hey, Boo Boo, I was I had an eternal source of food, so I never stopped chewing, Boo Boo. I feel bad about robbing everyone, boo-boo, but I am so hungry. Oh, Yogi, you're my guru. There was an episode of Jellystone where Yogi had an infinite tummy.

Oh, okay. So hopefully that explains it. Okay, now I get it. Well, so Zooks, you wanted to talk to us about something? Is everything okay? Well, actually, no. I don't know if I need to take some personal time off or even who I should talk to about this. but when I was talking to the clam

or the clam was talking to me it kept going on and on and on about how empty I was and how I didn't have a home and I don't know if you have picked up on it but I'm having a little trouble getting the clam's voice out of my head Yes And one of the things that I don't quite understand, from what I know about my fellow Brynard, you're able to tap into memories of those that have consolidated to make up your being, your soul.

And I realized in that moment that I don't have any of, you know. those memories. I didn't have anybody to tap into or advise me. And I don't know what to think. I don't even know who I should talk to. Zeus, can I, right off as a bat, can I give you a piece of advice? That's what I'm asking for.

Okay. You need to stop mentally connecting with every single large animals that we come across in our journey. That shit will fuck you up very quickly, as is evidenced by this clam. It seems like everything we meet, be it a turtle or a clam or what have you, you want to immediately psychically connect with it. And maybe we need to be a little bit more choosy about who we psychically. Guard your heart a little bit. You got back your heart.

You're a fragile person and a briner. You're a fragile brine. Well, you know what? You may be strong, Brinard. I don't know that many of them. And secondly, Zook's, the experience that you have of only being able to hear your own thoughts

and being able to only access the memories that you've made since you were animated or whatever. The term would be, this is a pretty universal experience. This is what the emperor and I feel I have access to only the memories that I have made since I was born. This is not the worst things that I have ever heard. You might be different, but different is not bad. It just means that you will have other strengths.

and other challenges along the way, but I have seen you handle yourself very well in several different, absolutely difficult and terrifying situations. And I think the only things that is wrong with you is the same things that is wrong with everybody else, which is we are all just trying to understand ourselves and understand who we are and what we are doing.

Nobody else knows any better than you. I have no fucking clue what I am doing. I lived most of my life as a ward of the church, and now I am, I have magic, and I, you know, fight the giant clams, I guess. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know. That's tough.

Do that help? I think we both equally contributed to this conversation. I know. I did. You know what, though? You leap right into, if I'm going to give you some advice now, not that you're out of the parsonage, is that the time? That's close, though. Cloister, thanks. You got to listen a bit more, man. Like, you do a lot of talking and telling, but sometimes people just want you to hear it, you know? I heard it, Zooks. Hey, pound it out. That's tough. But I, I, you shouldn't try to fix it. Not every time. This is literally all I know how to do.

Yeah, I know. But, you know, you're just getting started. Same as Zeus. Well, there's a slight difference. He's got that childhood. He's got that growing up. I don't care if you live in a cloister or an oyster. It was a savage bummer, though.

Don't trust me. There's nothing that great about a history, you know. I got one. What did I do? A kill a bunch of sharks. Last time I got horny. God Christ, I can't even tell you. Well, just when I killed that shark.

But, hey, there's nothing great about a history. We're all just kind of figuring it out. That's the human experience, but like, you're not going to fill that hole in with talking, you know? Does that make sense? Well, I do not know about this. It helps to talk to people. It helps to share experiences with others

and to give voice to your concerns and to your feelings. there's nothing wrong with talking about your feelings, Amber. Yeah, but Zook was telling you about his feelings, and then you started telling him how he should feel. Sometimes you just got to listen. Hey, Zooks, that's rough. Pound it out.

Wait, is it rough or is it tough? No, I'm really confused. We use that word for both. It's both rough and tough, pounded. Rough and tough. Rough and tough. Okay. Listen, I appreciate what both of you have had to say,

And I will take it into consideration. It's not a summit. We're just people talking to each other. Right. You guys are so weird sometimes. Yeah. And she walks out. You just leave them?

You leave the cloaca and leave them behind? Yeah, I just, I mean, they can follow if they wish. They wish. I'm done with this particular scene. After Amber leaves, Chauncey comes to the table. table with a big doggy bag full of, uh, of goulash, loose goulash, uh, that he slurps down at the table and he says, um, this, uh, for the road. Uh, I, uh, y'all, y'all are, y'all are really brave and cool.

And, um, he, uh, is he saying this to himself? No, he's saying it to, to the two people who didn't just leave the, the, the, the, uh, okay. Oh, got it. Okay, sorry. And you killed a blink shark. That's great. I can't wait until I get my hands on one of those stinkers. So here you go. And he sets it down and scurries back into the kitchen. I'm going to give you all rations for free for your next mission. Hell yeah. Generous rations. So benevolent. Such a kind.

As a sort of, as a, when you said that about. filling up your bag with infinite food. I got excited and it gave me the idea to reward you for your your good uh your good time here at the cloaca. So could we get a grog traveler or two to grog? Something you drink. Fizzy. Yeah, you want Fizzy for the road. No problem. A traveling fizzy. Traveling fizzy please. You can drink anywhere you want. I would duck back in. You can drink anywhere you want to in Josh's knuckle. It's the law. Well, the absence of a law, which is like a law.

Come on. Let's do this. You all make your way the next day after a well-deserved rest, back down to the bluespan brokerage. You get off. Did you say it was a long rest? Absolutely. Yeah.

Of course. I'm not going to make you maintain damage from one mission to the, like nobody's going to punch you on your next mission and you'd be like, oh, shit, I died because the clam fucked me up. Oh, do you remember eight days ago? No, you're all fine. Don't sweat that. You get off the Crystal Ascension.

You're down in the gills. And just as you're about to walk into the Blue Span brokerage, a trio of contractors walk out. One of them is a squat, briner with some heavy-looking weapons strapped to their back. there is a very tall slender person she's wearing almost like a white pantsuit situation and she's wearing like dark glasses over her eyes and then there is a sort of stocky Delmer like engineer maybe they've got they've got some tools around their waist and like an arcane sort of cannon on their back. And as they walk out, they stop when they see you.

And that squat Brynar, she laughs. And she says, oh, oh, look, y'all, it's the crew of the glory holess. Oh, this is very good. They all. That's good, actually. Damn. That's very clever. The name is Coriolis.

No, this is, oh, Zooks, I will explain to you later. What is the name of your ship so that we can make a funny nickname up for you as well? Like we're going to give you the chance to raz us? It would be really great if your ship was called like Zlupol, because then we could say it's a poo pole. And this would be very good. That's good. Yeah, what is it? It's a really cool name that can't be made fun of.

The snard liffer. and so we can say You switch them You switch them Yes, this would be good The no gads Oh, this would be good Is there some things like this?

If your ship doesn't have a name You can admit it Yes There's no shame in that We could name it for you I've just come up with some very good ones Yeah How about the Dickie Craver

What is this good Maybe somebody else in your junior high school Can come up with a name for it Dang, that's good God Zooks, you didn't even know about jokes 30 seconds ago, now you're fucking Fantasy Don Rickles.

They say this Brynard, who seems to be talking for the group, she says, maybe you should spend a little less time worrying about what our ship is called and a little bit more time worrying about whether or not we're going to leave

any jobs for the rest of you. And then she holds up a blue folder and you realize it's one of the jobs that was offered to you in the last... Which one? Was it one of the good ones? Make a perception?

Yeah, perception or investigation. She just flashed it. Yeah, you're real. That's a, wow, a natural one. I don't even know if it's paper. Hey, what's that banana you got? You got, the other two can also roll. Yeah, I got a 14 plus 3.

17. I got a 16 plus 1. 17. Yeah, you both see that it was the mission to reclaim the, the metals that had come out of nowhere, the scrapyard metals, where some sort of menace had occupied this scrapyard.

And this briner snaps and says, let's move. Wait, where did you get your cool glasses? I like your glasses very much. I would like to get myself a pair. Where did you get these cool glasses? The tall woman in the pantsuit looks down at the briner,

who looks back at her and nods. And she says, I got them at the Up Your Butt store And where is this? Is this on the Come on, come on, come on. And the three of them walk away

and they hop inside of a bright red and white sleek looking speedy ship just down the dock. And as their somewhat gaudy ship dives into the water. Its stern rises up, and in that moment, you can see that this ship is named the gut punch, which rhymes with butt munch.

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