The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Graduation Ep. 28: Business Plan

Episode Date: October 29, 2020

Time to answer some questions. Time to make some plans. Time for everything to change. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

Now, I imagine you have so many questions. I'm much more forthright than my counterpart, and it's the reason I, let's say, encouraged you to come here today. So we could finally speak face to face and get it all out in the open. So are you two like twins? What's the deal? It's... We have found it difficult for mortals to comprehend,

but basically we are not the same being, but we occupy the same physical space in turns. Lady Hawk. Oh, no. We are... Oh, I saw a lady hawk above. It just flew right above us. You can tell from the plumage that that is a male.

Right. I regret this error. It is a great shame. So you two share a body, but we have only spoken to chaos this whole time. We share, yes, perhaps a physical presence in this plane. Right, okay. Yes. Well, all right.

It's got to be some way to tell you to a part because this has taken on a real, you know, a real parent trap kind of thing. Because how do we know we're not speaking to the other when we're speaking to you? We can't, chaos cannot exist currently in this plane. Perhaps I'm not explaining it clearly. No, I think I got it. Every time we've spoken to chaos has either been in our dream. or in weird sort of alternate plane states. So you're saying that you're this plane's version of you.

Wow, this is kind of complicated. So let me start at the beginning. We do not control who is present in existence. It depends on which state. newa is in at any given time when the world is in flux and things are changing chaos is summoned to shepherd the shift towards structure and when things are secure and growing at a steady pace it falls to me order to make sure that there are opportunities for transition. And this has been the cycle for as long as NUA has existed.

I raise my hand. Yes. Shouldn't you all switch names? As I said, it is what we have been called and what we most identify with, because during times of order, I am present. Okay, okay, I got you now. I got you now. So if we kill chaos, what's going to happen to you? Oh, but we are, hey, sorry.

Let's quick sidebar. And if you could just pretend like you didn't just hear that, that would be rad, rad, rad, rad, rad, rad, rad, rad, rad, rad, rad. We're not talking about killing chaos. Oh, what? I thought that was the whole thing. No, we're talking about Prince Gray, the demon prince. Right, right, right. Oh, I'm sorry.

And also, even if we were, maybe don't say that to the thing that occupies it. same form. Okay. I got this cover. Don't right. This dude is such a clown. He jokes like that all the time. Oh, you should have seen your face order. He does not seem like a joke.

That's how you know. He's good at it. The best jokes. I am amazed with your mendacity and your ability for chicanery. Thank you. Thank you. To be clear, I wasn't threatened.

You might as well threaten the concept of fear or change or whatever. We are simply the representations and shepherds of a frame of existence. Okay. I think I follow you so far. So you're telling me right now where this world is heading towards a transition. and that's why you have manifest. Well, the problem is I have been in this existence for far too long. Over two centuries at this point.

Things have been too chill for too long. Too stagnant, Master Fearbug. The nature of business has crystallized. this world. And the windows and opportunities for change have become smaller and smaller. You see, when things were run by kings and warlords, a fragment of a whisper could start a revolution. But now, all the frustration in NUA isn't enough to overcome the mountains of red tape. And those in power have set up so many obstacles that change. of any kind is out of the question.

But this is a great success of a free market capitalist society is the increased stability, as markets self-regulate due to the shifting forces of supply and demand. Fitzroy turns invisible while he spouts off neoliberal shit so that I'm not in this scene and don't get tweeted at. No matter how you feel about the idea of business, let us focus instead on the current system. Because the current system is all smoke and mirrors to distract us. The cowards play at being villains and the lazy have stolen the mantle of hero and they play pretend for the entertainment of the rich and powerful. They help no one and threatened nothing. You yourself have found frustration in the so-called heroic oversight guild.

There is nothing heroic about them. They exist to make sure their wealthy benefactors are satisfied. That is all. I raise my hand again. Yes. Should I keep doing it feels like in the presence of whatever you are, I should be sort of minding my peas and Q. So I kind of agree, and I'm not a fan of like this whole way the world operates,

but as you said, we are in a kind of orderly state right now, and with order often comes peace, and as sort of difficult and bureaucratic as things are sometimes, I would say the land is somewhat peaceful, demon invasions notwithstanding. Yes, but in that piece, can't you see how few opportunities for growth and change there are? What you call peace, I call stagnation.

And not only that, in this system, in this peace, there is also restriction and unfairness. You must have felt it. Argo, when the Commodore,

orchestrated your mother's assassination, was there any possible recourse for you? You against a famous naval hero, a no-one in the eyes of the world? What justice could you have gotten? No, I didn't have any options open to me. And what about you, Master Fearbook? If your home was threatened with destruction right this moment, Do you think a single so-called hero in Nua would lift a finger to help unless they were paid? Perhaps not.

I mean, I would, Argo and I would help, I bet. Right, Argo? Oh, yeah, I'd help verbal. Fitzroy. You mean Fitzroy the villain? Oh, well, I don't really subscribe to labels. Oh, Fitzroy, you more than any should see my point. What chance do you have in this world?

You have so much fire in your heart and the true desire to make something of yourself. But in the eyes of this superficial world, you had so little to offer. Yeah. Yeah, no, I mean, I struggle with that. And I'm for sure picking up what you're putting down order. But, like, it's hard for me to make that call for everyone. What are you suggesting we do? because your counterpart has also sort of worked in abstraction this whole time.

I would love some, if not guidance, just some explicit sort of statement of your desire. Of course, of course. This is why I wanted to speak with you so that I could speak plainly. This system is like a bone that has healed crooked. and the only way to fix it is to break it again. That is why, 50 years ago, chaos and I began working together to put a drastic plan in motion. It's drastic, but simple, really.

If the people want an epic battle between a hero and a villain, that is what we will give them. Now, the villain was easy. Gray is desire incarnate, and what he most desires is conflict, a conversation, a nudge or two in the right direction, and Gray was in place. And we were able to keep that opportunity open for him at the school by simply fanning the flames of cowardice slightly in higgleness. The real trick was keeping him from starry. the war before we were ready. Keeping him in place at the school for 50 years was like, like herding transdimensional cats.

Now the hero was harder. The denizens of Nua have lost something. One might call it passion. And they smile at you. Then we found a half elf who truly desired the things we could offer. fame, power, influence. These things were ours to give, but he lacked the moral fortitude of a true hero,

had little skill to rely on, and was far too isolated to be a true leader. Then a stroke of genius. Why not a team? A passionate half-health, plus a lonely fear bulb, plus a Janossi sailor in Needs. of a captain equals one perfect hero. Once more, it took very little guidance. A fearball

wandering the woods turns left instead of right. For the genocci, a drift in life, all it took was an ad for a sidekick school for a plan to form. You, Fitzroy, you were a little tougher. You had already started down the path towards what you thought you wanted. It was the wrong path, but You just couldn't see it. So, in order to take away what you thought you wanted, we simply gave you what you needed. The potential for magic was already dormant within you. The desire burned in your heart. All you needed was fuel.

Fuel that chaos could provide. Applied in an opportune moment, say, in the middle of a class, and you were on your way to being in the right place. at the right time. Great. Great, great, great. I think all three of us can agree. Great stuff.

Great stuff. Great, yeah. So our entire lives have been completely manipulated by you. No, only tiny decisions in the last year or two to make sure you were all wearing. we needed you to be. And where you need us to be is a battlefield,

waging war against Gray to destroy the sort of artifice of the heroic oversight guilt. Am I reading that correctly? Fitzroy, you are thinking far too small.

The third part of the plan, well, it begins here and they gesture towards the portal. I found this weak spot between planes 50 years ago. After slicing the terrain to grant myself access, I began pulling at the edges. Not unlike unraveling a woven textile, weakening the boundary, expanding the portal, and after all this time, it's almost ready.

In a few months, the transition will begin. When the last metaphorical thread is pulled, reality will tear, and this plane and the hell plane will merge. Horrors will be unleashed on Nua. A truly epic battle will rage, and the destruction will be incalculable. But when the dust settles, you and yours will be triumphant. With the help of chaos, the planes will be separated. once more, and you will begin to rebuild, not as Sir Fitzroy,

Argonaut, and the lonely Fearbug, but as the Thunder King, the Cracken, and the Fearborg welcomed home. Now, many will die. There it is. I saw this, Coven. We were waiting for this. How many? I mean, we're a ballpark.

If you know what the result of this plan will be, you should know an exact number. It's more than you would want to know. More than one is actually pretty bad. This is like a weird trolley problem. I thought you would say three tops. Um, that's not great, order. Yes, but the land soaked with their blood will be fertile fields in which to sow a new society.

Wildland. You know this sort of language is. challenging. But think of the potential for growth and change that could come out of this miasma of chaos. But why do you, this is the only thing I keep getting hung up on. You're saying there's too much order in the world. And obviously, chaos thinks there's too much order in the world. Who's standing up for order?

I think I understand. Oh, God. I'm the only one that doesn't... No, no, no. You are tired. Your watch has been long. And now you wish to rest. And you are willing to...

Move whatever pieces on your board you must to give yourself that rest. I hadn't, I would be lying, actually, if I said I hadn't thought of it that way, but I'd like to think my motivations were slightly more altruistic, but I am tired. I am tired of having to stand by while I see people taken advantage of by a system that doesn't care if they live or die as long as someone's pockets are lined. I am tired of watching potential wasted because they don't fit the mold of so-called heroes. I'm tired of standing by. There's got to be another way, though, huh? There's got to be another way.

If I have learned anything recently, if you need tremendous world ending things to happen, just wait like 20 minutes. Yeah. Well, okay. Can we stop this in any way? Or is the, or is the future that you see going to befall us,

no matter what? It is the future I am creating. Okay. There's a little wiggle room in there. I appreciate that. Um... You... You...

What... You must understand. I... I truly believe that once I brought you here, once I showed you, I was here, and we could speak that you... perhaps not the fear bold, maybe not Argo, but that you Fitzroy would understand

what chaos and I are trying to accomplish here. Oh, I understand completely. You're trying to tear down a system that assigns a value to every living being in this world. And that's wrong. I understand that more than you might think. but your solution order assigns a value to a great many number of people and that number is zero because they're going to die for the future that you want.

You seem like a very powerful thing, but I do not think that humanity, or I guess because, you know, we're all kinds down here. empathy is your strong suit. No, Fitzroy. What I think you lack is perspective. I have empathy. I understand that sometimes when a wound festers, the only answer is amputation to save the body. You are unwilling.

to make the sacrifice needed to save this world. Oh, no, wait a minute. Wait, a minute. Now, all we're doing is expressing our concerns. Nobody said we weren't in favor of this. Yes. The devil's advocate. We're just talking here.

This is what we do. We are Thunderman Incorporated. We look at every problem from a different angle and come up with a solution. I have questions. Let me ask one question. Is Gray in on this? Does Gray know that this is the ultimate big plan? Gray knows that he gets a war.

That's all he's been promised. He is a blunt object. The real, the important, let's say the king on this board is the three of you. You must be left standing at the end of this. Oh, that's not even like up for debate. Like when Thunderman rolls in, we're going to absolutely clap Gray's butt cheeks. Our success right is statistically at least 67%. So, yeah, that's, that's, that's, that's, that we're looking fine in that department.

Um, okay. You, you speak of perspective. I think for you, from your position, we must look like the ants. But the thing about the ant is you cannot expect him to help you clean up the picnic when it is ended. He does not understand the picnic is over. He can only see the crumbs in front of him. Hmm. Master Fiegel.

Hmm. Do you support and agree to go along with the plan? I must speak with my associates? Of course. Have up, You can't lie about this, can you? Hmm. No.

Interesting. But I do not think I will. Okay. Order, I am sorry you are tired, but it is not worth punishing innocent lives. for you to have your rest. You know, we can keep giving the hard sell to Fear Bowl, so don't, you know, don't hold it against him.

We'll keep workshopping it, the idea. It's a strong pitch you've made, order. So, yeah, we'll talk it over with Fear Bowl. Maybe we can figure out like a compromise, a middle ground or something along those lines. Fitzroy, would you attempt to lie to me? Absolutely, I would not. That's a 15 plus 8 deception 23.

Okay, let me contest that. Damn, tricking to God, though. What got that stat you need on that? They stare you down and they say, You forget. I have seen through the eyes of chaos inside your mind. I know every dark corner. where you would hide.

I understand that this will take you some time to accept as an inevitability. And so I hope you understand that until that time, I can't have you in the way. We'll just go to our rooms then? And they hold out their hand. and Fitzroy Flex of Blue Light I thought you were going to tell me to flex And I would but I just bought this shirt

No flex of blue light Raise from your skin And They pull towards Order's hand Until none are left And you realize in that moment That you

had grown accustomed to the background perceiving of magic that your magic allowed you to do. And here, next to the portal, it was practically a background hum. But now it's gone. You... And... Is all my magic gone or just my ability to kind of sense it? You don't know. You've just noticed something is different.

I mean, I immediately try and cast a spell. I immediately cast, uh, press a digitation, just, like, shoot some sparks up. Nothing happens. I will return your magic when you are ready. This war must be won, and it must be won in the fashion decided by chaos and I. And, I fear... You know too much about this portal, and I can't have you threaten it. So if you will excuse me.

And you are no longer at the bottom of the God's Garkasm. You are back at the surface, at the ground level above it. Or you would be, except it's gone, and the ground is sealed over. The entire chasm. Yes. Can we just like table talk a little bit? I've been wanting us to do that more often. Sure.

Sure. And not like, not in character. I don't want to make any decisions in character, but I do want to make sure that we all have the same understanding of what is happening. Is that fair? Yeah. If we have any misconceptions, like Travis can kind of. I fully support this.

You just got a lot of information. Okay. So my conception of this, the way I understand our, current scenario is that order wants a break, chaos wants to take over, they are agreed in that front as near as we can tell.

They want to start a war. They bullied, you know, they basically manipulated Gray into also wanting this war. He's a bad person. And so now we are, we have been through their machinations

drawn into this conflict. where we must basically fight against gray to create chaos. Is that a fair summation? I mean, the broader, more abstract idea is that all they want is for the world to change, for the world to transition. And the way that they have devised doing it in a spectacular fashion is a war that will tear the seams between realities. So, like, whether or not we go to war or not doesn't seem like, I mean, that's their plan, and I'm sure that's how they would like things to go.

But I imagine a transformation of some sort will be sufficient. Well, Dad, what's your take on it? I want to see where everyone's at. Well, no, I think I understand for a change. But if you boil it all down, is it because ordered, is tired of his job? There. So that was Fearbug's take on it. What I attempted to make clear in order's answer is that that is a part of it, but it is more that order.

Think of chaos and order as like the physical representations of, like, a thermometer, right? A thermometer isn't making it hot or cold, but you can look and see where the thermometer is at. to see what the state of being is. So it's more, all three of you make an insight check. I thought we were just talking. We are, but before I give away a big piece of information, I want you to earn it. Dance for me, monkeys.

12 plus 012. God, Griffin, you just did that in your head. No, I used the website. No, you just added 12 and 0. Oh, yeah. 19 minus 1, 18 2 All right, Argo

Outside, more like it Okay Argo, you got the impression As you sit here and think about What the Fearbulk said About them wanting a break And you know what Argo, have you ever played chess

Is Argo a games player? We played a game Shipboard Did it involve Limes? It was called chest where we played on top of a chest that had a bunch of stuff in it and then what you did was you set these game pieces up on the top of the chest and then you look at it for a while and whoever is the fastest to open the chest and send all the pieces of flying wind so no okay but it

sounds to me like you have some experience with strategy perhaps naval battles um you know Your mother's ship, the Mariah, was part of a fleet once she was a privateer. So I think you've had some experience with strategy and the idea of like a lot of pieces in play at one time. And the way it sounded to you from the way order described the plan was that perhaps more than manipulating, as Fitzroy and the fear bold we're feeling, It's more that in the past they haven't taken an active role. They were just kind of gentle correctiony guides. And now they are being very active in the proceedings. Because of how stagnant it has gotten.

Because of how stagnant it has been. It's more like their job in the past was the ability to gently guide and, you know, change little things here and there to make sure the cycle continued. and as they attempted to do that over the past couple centuries, it wasn't working. I get that. But what I'm saying is it seems to me that by its very nature, order wants things to be stagnant. No. Why not?

The opposite is true. Order kind of shepherds the world to change. I think it might be good if we freed ourselves from the, notion that these two deities want, individually want anything, right? I mean, it would be, it seems like it is just time, according to their hot take, and they are going to do what it takes to shift the balance back. Okay.

Like, order doesn't have the same sort of human motivations that we would have towards these forces. It's just, it's time. So, I mean, it feels like, If the sun hadn't risen for several years, and the sun, if the sun were a person and it was trying to rise, like that is what, it's not like it needs to or wants to. The moon would want it to rise too because that's just the natural. Right. I got that.

Yeah. I agree with you. And what I'm wondering is it's not a permanent position. These are not eternal forces. They said somebody had been doing it for 200 years. Somebody did it before them. and somebody could do it after them. And I would assume chaos is the same way.

To clarify, they have been doing it for as long as Nua has existed, as long as this has been the cycle. The last 200 years, order has been the one physically present in the world. It's just their shift has been the last 200 years. Yes. But it's only the two of them. They go back and forth. The sun and the moon is a good way to think of it.

I think that that is a, that one of them's in the sky at any given time, right? Like, I think, I think that that is a good way to see it. Neither one of them wants to set or rise, but they do have to because it's the, it's just the way things go. Only the moon has been out for 200 years now, and it's game, it's getting fucking old. Can we, can we, like, jump cut to an unbroken chain? Are you guys cool with that? I feel like that would be the natural sort of next step.

I'm fine with that. I would like just a few minutes of like in character so we can sort of take our individual temperatures before we open the discussion up to a wider group. I would like to know where we all stand if that's cool by you guys. Sure, of course. Okay, so how about this, if I may?

As soon as you return to the school, you alerted the unbroken chain through, you know, your clandestine machinations that it was time for an update and an emergency meeting. And so you have scheduled that for as soon as you can get everyone together, you are estimating about 15 to 20 minutes for everyone to be able to make their way towards their new meeting place, which is Jackal's balcony, seemingly the only place free of observance. And they're a little reluctant to use the HQ as last time they did, they were locked into a stone cavern.

Not a great HQ. So you find yourself with a brief window to kind of get on the same page together before you have to relay all of this information to the unbroken chain. Okay. Argo starts off by relating to the other two what he learned in his insight check. And Travis, why don't you go ahead and replay what? that was. So they get it. I got it, but so that they get it. The explanation that Argo gives is he gets the impression that up until now, they have not taken a direct hand, that they have more

made sure that everything has stayed on pace. Think of it like watching a bike chain, right? You don't have to constantly guide the chain. You just make sure it doesn't slip off of the gear. And now it seems that they are actively participating in events, which seems to be outside of their normal habits. So, yeah. So that's the way I see it. But imagine I said that in Argo's voice. Right.

Like you could. Like you could. Ooh, I guess you could. This is what I cannot understand. What? why should we do this? What do we care? If we don't fight gray, people will die.

If we fought gray, people will die. What do we care the whims of a god? Well, I mean, I've been pretty adamantly team, not war, for a bit. Hence the A-S-S-A-S-S-I-N. You just said ass twice. Yes. Yes. But if we kill Gray, then a new villain will rise to take Gray's place, no.

There will never be a shortage of people that would destroy to raise themselves up. It's, oh, God, all of a sudden the war seems so inconsequential. Because I think our mission parameters have changed yet again. And now that I'm thinking about it, maybe we do need to keep this between the three of us. Hmm. that will make for an awkward meeting with the unbroken chain. Well, we can tell them some things, but we, if we don't do... How do we meet God?

Yeah, that's a great question. If we do nothing, it's profound to me that chaos and order are manifestations of the ideas of chaos and order, and that they are using some form of agency to change chaos. us in order in the world. It doesn't seem, that seems like just heat making itself hotter or, or water making itself wetter. But they're just going to get more involved the longer this world doesn't change. But there has to be some reason they got us involved.

There has to be, I mean, why go through all this? If they have the power to just say, okay. it's changed, they have to have agents that they're using. They don't have that power. The reason our goal that they chose us is because we would win. If we went up against Gray and we had our army and they had their army, we would do some. I would find the sword of legend and the two of you would die valiantly sacrificing yourselves to get me to the finish line as I buried the blade in the demon's chest. I do not care for this plan.

If you are taking a vote. But yeah, the Stormbringer and the Craken. You know, I had this dream. Yeah. So they showed me this dream where I was this super powerful admiral, and I was in charge of a fleet. And the consequence of my action wiped out a boat full of, you know, people. Listen, I'm just going to say it.

We're all dancing around it. I don't give a flying shit about. being a big time Kraken guy if it means a whole bunch of people are going to die. It's a, I'm sorry. I'm taking the micro view instead of the macro view.

I'm not, I'm in favor of it. I think it's wrong and I don't give a shit about being this the language thing. Sorry. I don't give a poop. The poop doesn't seem to have the same.

It's just where we agree. You're getting very hefey. We agree. But what choice do we have? We have one choice. If we refuse, then they will find another hero. If we kill Gray, they will find

another villain. The cycle will continue no matter what we do. What they demand is change on a truly massive scale. If we want the violence, the threat of war, all of it to be extinguished, we must provide that change in a peaceful way. Professional sports. No. No. No. Okay. That's a good. No. Okay. That's. I had something there for a minute. Oh boy.

We, I think this pains me greatly to say. But perhaps it is truer to by nature. But we must destroy the economy. Yes, it's

something along those lines. We must destroy capitalism and instill a form of socialist socialist change. Yeah, I mean, I'm all about that. It doesn't...

This is what we will do. I, on my very first diet, this school, I tried to learn accounting, and I wished that math would be destroyed. And now I have realized I should have listened to my instincts all along. Hey, I just wanted to jump in before anybody tweets of me. This wasn't my...

It wasn't like, oh, Travis created all of graduation. There's a fucking, there's a golden dragon named capitalism. We have to go and kill it. There is no embodiment of the system that we can bury a dagger in. We must destroy the system itself. That is how we prevent the war. We dismantle the system. Yeah.

We begin with the heroical. Oversight Guild. And once it has been dismantled, we move on to the next. Think. And I look around, this is a completely secure space, right? Yes. I think we might be standing in what comes next. Yes.

This will be the second home that I have lost. But... But perhaps it will prevent all others from... losing their home as well. But what is the, are we, Argo, you're, you're being very quiet right now. Do you, no, I'm just, I'm just thinking about, uh, what I can do to disrupt the economy. Well, we're sort of talking about in subtle ways. No, no, no, I don't, I don't know about, but we don't, I don't know about, but we have to take concrete.

action. I got a couple of ideas, but I, you know, you're talking a long game here. This is not something that, you know, that I think we can, that we can just, you know, do when a, how long do we have, 30 days? How long do we have? You have about four months at this point. Oh, plenty of time to destroy the economy. We got it. We got it. Listen, I think it makes sense. It is certainly more appealing to me than a large-scale battle, we replace the system with something that treasures all above coin. I am a fear bug. I have no use for money, and I forgot this. When Orter spoke against this system, my heart was pained.

But I have forgotten my nature. We have all. forgotten our nature. You Fitzroy are not a climber. You are not someone who needs advancement to prove

your worth not anymore. No, Fitzroy, you're a wild boy. You're a wild boy who can change everything with your magic you cannot control. I don't have it anymore. I don't. If they wish incredible change

then they will find it in a wild boy and a fearbug that has no use for money and a pirate that seems to only want vengeance. Oh, I forgot I was a pirate. That's a good point. Yes, who better to replace order. Holy moly. I hope you don't, I hope you are not offended by this, Master Fearbol, but I talked to the board and we are going to just kind of scoot you over. away from the CFO position into something more along the lines of HR just for just as a sort of just to see if it's a more comfortable shoe for your considerably

When our work is done there will be no F. Yeah, that's sort of But hopefully there will be a lot of HRs We can't tell the unbroken chain We can't tell anyone No, we have been manipulative related to this point. Now we shall be the ones pulling the strings. May I make a wild and crazy suggestion?

This is the great watchword today, my friend. We're talking about so far. One, blowing up the guild. Two, blowing up the school. So... Three, blowing up the economy. Yeah, top that. Okay, then we need... It's going to be really tough for just the three of us to do it. But I know somebody who might be able to give us a... an aide. I do too, and if we're thinking about the same person, that's going to be really cool.

I doubt it because you and I have never had the same idea. Well, let's just do it on the count of three. And we'll say one, two, three, and then say it after three. Okay. One, two, three. Prince Gray. There! I'll be damned. I'll be damned.

Hey, you want to soak else? You want to tear stuff up? You want to mess up systems? Get a bunch of demons. to do it with you. There'll still be chaos. He'll get what he wants. But more than that, we have a pretty significant bargaining chip that we can finally, finally leverage against that big, big douche. What's this? He's going to lose. Let's report to the principal song.

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