The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Graduation Ep. 38: Finals

Episode Date: April 15, 2021

Where have all the good folks gone? Where is all of HOG? We need a streetwise thunderman to stop these scheming gods. Isn't there a Firbolg upon a flying steed? Reality is ripping, someone get me Argo Keene! We need some heroes. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

Hi, everybody. It's me, a dungeon master and your best friend, Travis McElroy. We've made it. This is the finale of an Adventure Zone graduation. I'm so excited for you to hear it. It was an absolute blast to record. It was even fun to edit. So I really hope that you enjoy it. I wanted to say a couple things first. Right off the bat, you will hear us talking about some special character sheets. So I created special versions of the characters that are. chaos builds. So Fitzroy kind of became on top of his, his powers already, a chaos storm sorcerer, Fearbol got additional chaos nature powers, and Argo got chaos water powers. So you'll hear us reference that a lot in the episode. Also, in two weeks, we're going to be doing a D-Venture Zone zone about graduation. So if you have questions for that, you can email us, Adventure Zone, at gmail.com with the T-T-A-Z in the subject line. And I also just wanted to say thank you. Thank you to you for listening.

Thank you to everybody who supports us. And thank you to my brothers and to my dad for letting me DM. It is, as always, such a pleasure to play with y'all and to have the opportunity to tell a story with you is always incredible. So I'm going to put the ads and the announcements and everything right here after this so that we can go straight through the episode. So without any further ado, let's get going. Previously on the Adventure Zone graduation, three friends were given a simple task, save the world. To do that, they needed to stop a war, so they gathered their forces. an army of skeletons, an army of gargoyles, an army of knights.

And they got some friends to help them. A lich king, a heroic oversight guild investigator, an adventurer, a demon prince, a fairy, a zorn. And a few enemies showed up. Two gods, one representing chaos, one representing order, a naval hero holding a grudge, and an army of demons. So the three friends had to hurry. Their Zorn friend dug them a tunnel so that they could sneak back into their school and get together with their allies. From there, they made a mad dash towards the cavern where a portal was being formed and ripping a hole in reality. When they arrived, they told one of the gods that it wasn't going to work, that it would destroy.

everything. And the gods fought. Order one. So chaos joined the side of the three friends and gave them access to their power. And that is where the battle truly begins. I've only got 67 hit points. Ignored the hit points on the chaos characters. You're still Sir Fitzroy Thunderman Maplecourt.

Okay. And in fact, just go. Go ahead and let's see, where are you at now? Where's everybody out now, hip points-wise? Yeah, 86. Go ahead and multiply by three. Your max hit points, everybody. And go ahead and add plus two to your AC as well.

You're all beefed up now, folks. Okay. Across the face of Nua, we see the same scene repeated countless times. The very air itself is being ripped open to allow monsters entry into our world. In a coffee shop, a law office, a mine, a family-run store, a bar, a cheesemongers, a hospital. Nowhere is safe. The heroic oversight guilt is in complete disarray.

Even before this, whatever this is, the structure of their entire operation had already been dismantled. Checks have stopped processing. Invoices sit unfulfilled. no one is being reimbursed, but more importantly, no one is being deployed to face this onslaught of demons. At some point in the past, this might have been a job for a hero, but not now. Not anymore. But currently, none of that is your concern. You are more focused on the cavern in which you stand. On one side, a Fearbolg, a Janossi, and a half-elf. On the other, a... a god that is literally hell-bent on destroying reality

and a portal you must close before it destroys existence. And in between, a seething ocean of hellhounds and dragons. Roll initiative. It's a lot of roles you're going to have to do, Trave. Well, I'm controlling the hellhounds as a horde. So I have special mechanics for how it's going to work. So basically what I've done is I've combined all of their hit points into one pool.

Yeah. So when you attack the hellhounds, right, you will be attacking the hellhounds in general. So you won't need to target a specific hellhound or worry which one's closest to you. This cavalry is so jam-packed that there is one close to you at any given time. Okay, cool. So the damage that you do will be applied to there. So all you have to worry about is the horde of hellhounds, three dragons, and order. So five total monsters.

I rolled my stats are different on this turbo sheet So I rolled initiative on my actual stuff and I got a 14 Okay I thought order and chaos shared the same body is that not true right now Interesting isn't it okay You know what I'm gonna say go ahead and roll Arcana You can roll either Arcana or Insight whichever one you 25 okay yeah so with that what you know is that right now

You are able to put together that between the sheer amount of energy contained within this cavern, the chaos magic at play, and more importantly, the fact that the fabric of reality is coming undone, they shouldn't even be able to exist in the same plane at the same time, let alone in two different places. So this is a very, very special occurrence here that would not and any other circumstance be able to occur. but there is such a confluence of strange energies happening that everything is pretty fucked up. Cool. I got you. My initiative was 20. Nice. My initiative was a one plus one.

Oh, boy, I hanged back. And a bold... Strat. Okay. I go one. Okay. So I assume we're supposed to use the maximum level of what we have on these sheets, right? You just go wild.

In prep for this, I also, I wanted... I built these chaotic characters for... you, but I also wanted to give each of you a little gift. Oh. And so I have... Well, there's a pocket watch here, Travis, it says thanks for the adventure. Oh, I got flask.

I got socks. Hey, those are bombus socks, dad. The adventure socks. Is your flask engraved? Yeah. Because my socks are. Yeah. That's nice. Mine just says Justin's socks, so I think there was an error at the engrave. Oh, no.

And Travis, why is there an engraved picture of George W. Bush on the inside of my pocket watch. Oh. I thought you were into his art. No, sir. Okay. I'm only into your art. Hey, thank you.

No, I've built some special actions for each of you. Okay. For you, Fearbol, you have gained the action, Mother Nature's love. And as a free action, you can heal others or yourself for 3D10. for you Fitzroy, kinetic redirection as a reaction when an attack on you succeeds

the damage feeds back and they take four D6 damage Jesus, okay and for you, Argo, you have gained released the Crackin as a bonus action you use the water

of the earth to create a milstrom underneath the feet of creatures in a five foot circle. They must pass a DC-18 deck save or take 2D8 damage and be knocked prone. Yeah, listen, y'all

powerful boys now. Very strong. And up first is the fearbulk. I am I feel like the fearbulg isn't quite sure what's going to happen because this is all

so new. And he slaps his hands together and six meteors appear above him. Hell yeah. And this spell is called Melf's minute meteors.

I'm casting it as a seventh level spell because fuck all haters. Yeah, dude. That's my thing. So basically I'm shooting the... Okay, so there are all above me. I'm shooting out

Two of the meteors forced a floating above me. And I'm going to blast them at the first sort of the front of the crowd of Hellhounds. So they've got to make a deck saving throw. Okay. Oh, no. They fail. Okay. So they're going to take two D6 fire damage on a failed save.

So any of the ones like in, I don't know. how you're tracking this, but any of the ones in... Roll a D-10 for me? A D-10? Yeah. Six. Okay, yeah, you'll hit six of them. Okay.

Okay, and the damage is five. Five damage? Yeah, five total for six of them. Okay, so you hit them for 30 points of damage. Yeah, and I've got... Because I cast as a seventh level, I have seven meteors still above me. Oh, boy. Okay, great.

And you can just drop those whenever? Yeah. Okay. Up next is Fitzroy. Yeah, I'm going to harvest a few opportunity attacks. I'm just going to charge headlong right into the crowd, just trying to get in as close to the center of the mass of enemies as I possibly can. Okay. Make a strength check for me. Okay.

Just a regular old strength check? Correct. That is a 17 plus four. 21. Okay, yeah, with a 21, you barrel forward, you know, mole raised, and you are still crackling with energy. So the front wave has just been blasted. The ground is still dust and rock settling from the meteors cast from the Fearbulk. And as the, you know, remaining hellhounds recover and turn to look, you're charging forward with literal lightning

coming from your eyes and you barrel through them. And they, just from your very presence, they're going to take 20 points of damage as you charge through. And that's not even, that's just your move action. I haven't even done anything. Yeah. They, so now you're, you know, in the thick of it. I was hoping they would hit me so I could kind of some of that shit back.

Yeah, you're going to take three opportunity attacks for that. All right. Let's see what you got. Um, okay. I doubt very much that a nine is going to hit you. No, no, no. Um, does a 16 hit? Oh, sorry, 17 hit, yes.

17 definitely hits. 17 hits. Okay, so you would take, uh, 15 damage total. Oh, sorry, 18 damage total. Okay. Uh, they're gonna, whoever just hit me is going to take, oh, you're, kidding me eight points of damage back at them that was a terrible 4d6 roll uh and about as bad as it gets let me see if the other one gets you uh yeah so then uh 23 is going to hit you i assume yeah yeah yeah

one five uh man if i had known that eight damage was always going to ring out of this i wouldn't have been quite so 13 points of damage cavalier yeah sure well i got the i got the hit points to spare uh okay Now that I'm in the middle of everyone, I hit 88 miles an hour and vanish with an extremely loud, thunderous sound that can be heard up to 300 feet away. So everybody within 10 feet of me has to make a Constitution saving throw. Okay. Cool. Are they, them or not us? I got a Nat 20.

You're kidding me. Well, go ahead and roll that again, because I'm going to use my meta magic to force you to take disadvantage. using a heightened spell. Okay, yeah, no, I definitely failed that. Okay. Burned some sorcery points there. And so whoever, were these still, are we still talking about Hellhounds here?

Yeah, roll a D-10 for me? D-10? Yeah. Okay. Ten. Okay, yeah, you hit 10 of the Hellhounds with this damage. Cool.

Well, then that's going to hit for 29 points of damage. Okay, so that's 290 points of damage. Hey, that's probably the most of ever done on this show, huh? You got it's a big hit. Travis probably got some quad strikes in the past that probably may have done that. So I vanish and I reappear next to gray and immediately start trying to get the, is he still shackled up? Yes, he is.

Okay. I'm, I'm, you know, I've already used my action, but I'm, I'm, you know, going to start trying to tear away at the stone shackles that are containing him. Okay, great. The red dragon then charges at you Fitzroy. Okay. And does a... 16 is my AC.

Okay, yeah. So they hit. Okay. The red dragon reels its head back and spreads its massive jaws. The fangs snap shut, mere inch. from your face. The dragon has been dragged back by a claw the size of a mid-sized

car, which is attached to a crab the size of a bus. My boy! You're much louder now. My boy! And you have now gained access to giant snippers. Okay.

Which I'm going, I've made a character stat sheet for. Which I will now send to you. So tell us a little bit about Giant Sibbers You have written here Armor Class 18 Hit points plenty

Don't worry I appreciate that And he has a claw attack And he can squish If he grapples them With his big claws So yeah Let's try and grapple

I guess this big dragon It needs to roll A DC 11 I guess strength check? Mm-hmm. It rolled an 18 plus its strength, so it does not get grappled. He gets out of that. But he did, but Simbers did stop you from taking damage from that dragon.

Thank you. Not bad. Thank you. Up next is the blue dragon. The blue dragon is then going to turn onto you, Argonaut. Okay. And they are going to attempt to bite you. I know for a fact that a 12 does not hit your AC

But they have multi-attacks So they are going to try to bite you again Does a 17 hit your AC Yes, it does Okay, excellent Now does he also have a big crab No, unfortunately he does not You're going to take 18 points of damage, Argonaut

Oh, and you're also going to take, sorry, one second an additional 11 points of lightning damage from that bite. Jeez. All right. So how many points? 18 and I believe 11. That's 29 all day long. That would be 29 all day long.

How? It's not that bad. Yeah, come on. Just a little. Come on. Order turns at all this commotion from their work. You see them sigh deeply in frustration. and then they hold out their right hand

and a beam of a brilliant blue light flashes out in a five foot wide circle and they begin weaving it through the cavern and I need each of you to make a Constitution saving throw. I'm pretty good at that. 23. 22. Oh, four.

Oh, boy. Okay. One moment. Okay, you're going to take, let's say, six, 11, 12, 18, 24, and 29 points of damage, Argo, and you all are going to take half as much, so 14 points of damage, and Argo, you all are going to take half as much, so 14 points of damage. And Argo, you are currently blinded by this regians. It won't last that long, though. It's just a momentary, like a flash.

Okay. And up next are the Hellhounds. You bamped away, right? Fitzroy. Yeah, I teleported over to Gray to try and free him. Okay, then the first wave of Hellhounds is going to charge at the Fearbulk, who blasted them with meteors. Fair. Does a...

Does a 17 hit your AC? Sure does. Okay. Yeah. They're going to hit you. They're going to hit you. So five of them descend upon you and start gnashing at your various limbs. They're going to get you for 35 points of total damage.

Okay. And then up next is the green dragon who is going to also attack the Fearbulg. Hmm. They're going to swipe the claws at you? Does the 25 hit your AC? Don't answer that. I know it does. Okay.

So you're going to take 14 points of damage plus 12 points of poison damage. Oof. Wait, don't I have a resistance? Nope. I have no resistances. I thought I had a cultural resistance to poison, but maybe I'm imagining that. Now, so on your next turn, you're going to make your Constitution saving throw, and if you fail it, you're going to take that 12 points again until you pass your Constitution saving throw. And up next is Argo.

Do we get to choose our target? Are we just launching into this mob? So you have the horde of hellhounds is one. The green dragon is one, the red dragon is one, the blue dragon is one, and order is one. We have five targets, essentially. And those hellhounds trap, how are they looking? I would say Griffin, thank you for asking. They are looking, you know.

I think them for almost 300 points of damage in an attack. At this point, you've probably taken out a little less than 10% of them. You're fucking kidding. But Griffin, that 10% is of a thousand of those. So that's like 100 hellhouse. Okay, I'll take that. Okay. Argo is so excited to actually have magic that he can use other than just to make water.

He's going to cast cone of cold. And cone of cold, it's a blast of cold air erupting from his hands. Each creature in a 60-foot cone must make a Constitution saving throw. A creature takes 8D8 cold damage on a failed save. And it was, you said a constitution? Constitution? Who are you targeting? The hellhounds?

Great, great, great. Oh, no, they failed. They failed that for sure. Okay, so when you cast the spell using the spell slot of sixth level or higher, and this is seventh level, the damage increases by one D8 for each slot above five, so that's two. So that's an additional two D8. So that's 10D8. Roll that beautiful bean footage. All right.

10D8 Boise Here they go Holy crap It's a lot of dice 10D8 46 Hey pretty good

And actually they are Hellhounds So they're not good With cold So they're gonna take an additional 20 points of damage I've just decided right now Okay

Now do we have our Do we have our The same abilities we had before? Indeed, you do. Do I still have my rogue abilities? Yes, you do. Okay, then I'm hiding after that. Classic, classic triumphant battle moment.

Now, I love it because that is such a rogue, I'm glad, dad, that even with the power of a god flowing through your veins, your rogue instincts are still so sharply honed. I love it. Oh, like Loki. Yeah, I'm like Loki. Exactly like Loki. Now, here's what I want the three of you to do in turn. So Justin I first, then Griffin and then dad. Griffin first roll two separate D20s for me and tell me what the numbers are.

Yeah, sure. Well, the numbers are 11 and 18 for a total of 29. Okay, so first, Griffin, for the next minute, any flammable object you touch that isn't being worn or carried by another creature bursts into flames. Okay. And also, you cast fog cloud centered on yourself. Okay. Now, Justin, 2D20? It's going to be 11.

Well, what are the numbers? 1 and 10. Okay, great. You can take one additional action immediately. Whoa, fuck. And also, you're surrounded by faint ethereal music for the next minute. That's very cool. So go ahead and take an action, I guess.

Yeah, I'm going to take a quick action. In case anyone was wondering at home, I built my own custom. wild magic table and one side are only positive things and one side are only kind of things that don't really affect anything yeah natural things yeah i'm going to cast you hear this music um surrounding me and the fearbulk um points out in front of him and casts erupting earth um at the center of the pile of um hellhounds um and i'm going to cast that obviously as the seventh level of So that's going to be... Obviously.

7D12 bludgeoning damage. Who, but... Is there a save? What? Is there a save? Save, decks. Dex save. Okay.

Nope. Okay, that's going to give us... Let's say... That's a lot of die. My computer's chugging. Give me a minute. Hold on. I'm calculating it.

I'll get there. The man who lives inside your CPU is just doing it manually. It took a second. Okay, 33. 33 points. Excellent. Yeah, the ground erupts beneath him, throwing hellhounds into the air.

It is an absolutely wild sight as this fear bulb with, you know, the skin of an oak and meteor surrounding his head simply makes a fist and the earth shatters below them. And then Clint, roll 2D20 for me. That would be a 6 and a 14. Okay, so with a six, you teleport up to 60 feet to an unoccupied space of your choice that you can see. So you also bansf to somewhere, and you can choose where that is here in a minute.

And with a 14, an eye appears on your forehead for the next minute. And during that time, you have advantage on wisdom checks that rely on sight. So perception. Cool. Yeah. But those are the only things that happen. The cavern is full to bursting with chaos magic. Spells are flying left and right.

Combine that with the fraying laws of reality and things start to get weird. You blink and in that instant the scene changes and you are now kittens. The dragons are also kittens. So are the hellhounds and order. Everyone is kittens. The cavern is sized appropriately for kittens. Otherwise, everything is the same and the battle can be. Continues.

What? So up next is Fearbug. What's that, Griffin? Did, what? Everything's kittens? Everyone's kids. I heard that. Okay, fine. Fearbug, you're up.

Well, let me get this out of the way first. Enjoy these meowty-ors. Nice. And then I blast them with two more of my meteors. Uh-huh. Got to do that deck. saving throw. Nope, they fail. Three big points, baby. Suck it down.

How many? Three points of D, suck it down. Got it, okay. Cool, cool. Now, in Justin's defense, in defense of the narrative, you are a kitty cat. I'm a beautiful, precious kitty cat. You fired off, they turned into little cat toys floating around your head, so you basically just fired, like, a catnip-filled mouse at them. Okay, I find a way to raise myself to my feet.

and it looks amazing. And then emanating from my paw is a beautiful green flame blade that I'm going to use to strike down at the first hellhound I see. Okay, great. Roll a T-10 for me, Kitty. One. Okay, yeah, you catch one kitty. One kitty hound.

on Hell Kitty, uh, with this swing. So now, let's do it. Jeez, O Pete, that's a critical fail. This cat's worthless. Yeah, you, hey, I know you're going to draw the fear ball as a cat, but don't. I hate it. I hate it. I'll give it unlike if you draw the fear ball as a cat.

This cat's pointless and stupid. Now, we do have access to chaos magic, huh? Yeah. Juice, can I refer you to under features and traits where it says tides of chaos? All right, I'm going to try again, because I'm going to use the tides of chaos. There you go. This place is very pretty fucking weird, so I'm just going to try again. Now, that's in narrative.

I've, Fitzroy knows that magic. He knows that that exists. So I mean, me, and you know. There we go, a fucking 16. Yeah, that hits. That's more like it. So now I'm going to do two D8 damage, which is 10. and then

the green flame leaps to whatever the nearest hell hot is and it takes fire damage equal to my spell casting ability modifier which would be I guess plus five

okay great it does sorry I just one up sorry because of my level there's actually another 2D8 onto that bonus damage so that's another 10 So 15 total to the second target.

So Kitty Fearbulg, you swing your green flame blade and you miss, but it doesn't. But it did. I mean, it did, but it doesn't because chaos? Furbulk. Yes. Oh, man, that's good. Oh, Furbolg. I get it.

Perfect. Yeah. B-A-L-L-G. Yep. And you slice it these hellhounds and you hit one, but then you also hit another one because chaos. And up next is Fitzroy. I flex all my kitty cat muscles. Uh-huh.

and meow is loud and as fiercely as I possibly can. And I'm going to go into a rage. A kitty rage? A kitty cat rage. Okay. And when that happens, one creature of my choice in my aura takes lightning damage based on my level. So let's say, it's within 10 feet of me. I guess just one of the hellhounds since we're, well, no, you know what?

I'm going to take a swing at maybe the green dragon. Okay, great. So the Green Dragon is going to take, make a deck save, Green Dragon. Oh, that is a one. Okay, Green Dragon is going to take nine points of lightning damage. Okay. And I'm going to reach up and grab the stone shackles that are holding gray to the wall. Kitty gray, please.

Kitty gray, and I'm going to try and just crush them in my mighty pause. Okay, make a strength check for me. Okay. And I have something. I have advantage on strength checks. That makes sense. You're a raging kitty.

Ooh, yeah, baby. That's a 19 plus 423. Let's see if we can get that crit. We cannot 10 plus 3, 10 plus 4.14. With a 23, you are able to break the bonds of Gray. And now Kitty Gray has joined the fight as well. I tell Kitty Gray And this sounds like all heroic and dope and shit

In the kitty cat language that we are speaking But I think just to the outside observer It does sound like a little feline play date And I say Gray, you know what you have to do Take it to the dunk hole And I point to the portal That's the dunk hole

Get over there Start doing that thing you do By which I mean controlling The Army of the Damned Yeah, no, I understood. Yes, I knew. I'm going to have to get past order that's probably not going to go as smoothly as we might hope.

Yeah, you might say that's a tall order. Pretty good. But you also might not say that. Yeah, it's a different thing. Might not say that. This gray, this might help. And I give Gray my mall. Ooh.

Okay. Up next is, The Red Dragon, who is also a kitty. The Red Dragon is going to attack Fitzroy. Okay. Still being held by Snippers, it seems. They swing and a miss. Okay.

Thanks, Snips. And the chaos is building, and everything gets fuzzy. And when it clears, you're no longer kittens. Oh, I wanted to do something as a kitten. Well, you aren't your same. either. Fitzroy, you are the Fearbulb. Fearbulb you are Argo. Argo, you are Fitzroy. But all of your powers and abilities remain the same and the battle continues. Okay. So up next is Order, uh, who is going to take a swipe again with their magical beam. So, uh, everybody make another, uh, constitution saving throw?

Don't you think dexterity would help me dodge that being? 20, 24. I am, I got that hot hand. Hey, Trave, did I need to make, on my last turn, did I need to make a constitution saving throw for poison? Oh, yes, sorry, do that now. Okay, it was 14 for the con check you just told me to do. And then for poison, it is seven.

Okay, yeah, you're going to take another 12 points of damage. Got it. And then dad, what did you get? I got a 19. Okay, great. So you, Fearbol are going to take an additional 27 points of damage. Fof. Yeah, and everybody else is going to take half of that, so 13 points.

And Fearbug, you are now blinded and poisoned. Double poison. No, you're just still poisoned. Just you remain poisoned from the bite. And up next is Gray, who is going to charge the Hellhounds as well. Make a swing with that mall. Oh, yeah, that's going to hit. And what's the mall do, Griffin, damage-wise?

The mall does quite a bit of damage. It does 2D6 plus 5. I mean, that's with my stats. But, you know, I always felt a certain kinship with Gray. Well, he's going to hit 9. of them. He's going to hit nine of them for

eight points of damage, so 72 points of damage. Fuck. Are the animals still kitties? No. Okay. They're back to being their regular selves. I shout out,

I did not know you could swing them all like this. Because I'm the Fear Bowl. Yep. Exactly. It's good. It wasn't bad on this. I thought it was all right. are the hellhounds.

And at this point, they're going to take bites at whoever's closest, right? So at this point, that's gray, fear bog. And, yeah, Fitzroy, you were over by the wall, and Argo, you teleported away. So those are the two that they can reach. Does a 16 hit your AC, Fearbug? Yes, it does. Okay. I'm going to say it does not hit.

Gray as AC, he is a demon prince. That's not bad. Okay, yeah, not bad at all. 8, 14. Yeah, you're going to take 16 points of damage. Fear bunk. Okay. And up next is the Green Dragon,

who is now going to take a bite at Fitzroy. Ooh, yep. 24 versus E.C. Now, hold on. Wait. Okay, yeah, there's nothing I can really do about that. I have a cloud of fog around me. Does that not provide me any kind of...

Oh, you know what? I'm going to say that that's disadvantage. Good call. Well, that's a 17. Yeah, that's still is. Let's say it's 23. And they are going to... It's a sweet thought, though, huh?

One... No, so 12 points of damage, and then... Not bad. Then three points of portly's some damage. Oh, no, excuse me. And then five points of poison damage. Five points. All right.

And then up next is Argo. Okay. Gosh, I wish I was still a kitty. That's okay. I'm near me. Yeah, correct. Enjoy. Looking good.

See, you veered in a triumph there. Yeah. Gotta be careful. Looking good. Now, that just sounds like scary try. And don't forget, your bonus action have released the Krakken. I know. I know.

Okay, I still have to transport 60 feet, right? Yep, correct. Up to 60 feet? Yes. I'm going to transport to land. I'm going to transport so that I am on the Red Dragon's face. Okay. Uh, kind of holding on.

Yeah. And, um, I'm going to cast watery sphere. Okay. Uh, around its whole head and face. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Great.

Great, great, great. So. And it doesn't bother me because I can breathe in the water. Yeah, no, but the Red Dragon. panics. Panics real pad. And because it cannot breathe. And it also is not wild

about water being a dragon primarily a fire. And it panics so bad that it failed its deck save. And its head also slams into the wall. So you need to make a deck save now. But the result is that the dragon has been knocked unconscious

by its own flailing around and lack of oxygen. That deck save is a five, but I have advantage on Dexterose. Yeah, uh-huh. And that is a 14. So that is 24. Okay, yeah.

So as this Red Dragon slams its head into the cavern while knocking itself unconscious, we just see Argo, like, it's almost like a reverse dive. You know, he comes out of the water, gracefully like a swan, landing on. just like his tiptoes in a perfect kind of like he's about to jump off of a board into the water. It's truly amazing. And there's probably right now, with the combination of your rogue dexterity and the wild magic you possess, no one has ever been as graceful as you are in that moment. And let's see, then the judge says 9.8.

Not bad. Not bad. a flash and you are back in your own bodies. Sort of. They are the... So wait a minute, I just wasted that great maneuver. So when this is adapted into a movie, that'll be Fitzroy making that great maneuver.

That is absolutely correct. Oh, shit. I am like a bird. That'd be better, Dad, because we won't want you doing stunts, that many stunts in the movie. That's true. Yeah. So you're all back in your own bodies, sort of.

They are the bodies of Justin, Griffin, and Clint McElroy. But all of your powers and abilities remain the same, and the battle continues. Well, I really don't want to do stones now. So up next is Justin. Oh, thank God. I actually super appreciate you giving my voice to rest. So thank you so much. Yeah, you're absolutely welcome.

Feels so much more defined and powerful than I've ever imagined. Yeah, man, you look great. Okay, Justin McElroy is first going to do Mother Nature's Kiss. Is that right? Mother Nature's Love? Yeah, Mother Nature's Love. I'm going to do for myself, because I've taken some considerable hits. Some not inconsiderable hits.

We're going to do 3D10, which is going to heal me for a whopping 16 points of damage. Okay, and go ahead and make a Constitution saving throw for me. Charming. Sure. Hold on one second. Let me add that to my total there. Okay. Constitution saving throw is a 17. 18. Yeah. So your body has processed the point. Justin McRoy's body is able to process poison. Where the fear bulk fails, Justin McRoy succeeds. Yeah. And along those same lines, also go ahead and make a perception check for me to see how the blindness is going to affect Justin McRoy's powerful body. Uh, that's an eight. Justin's got gunnars on. So I feel like that should give him advantage. Well, I will say of the, of the four of us, Justin is the only one not required to wear glasses. So Justin, you do have advantage on perception checks for this game.

So go ahead and roll again for me and tell me how it turns out. Uh, because of Justin McRoy's incredible eyes. It's a 16. Okay. Yeah. Justin MacRoy's powerful eyes are so powerful that the blindness of magic doesn't affect him. So you are unpoisoned and unblinded. Okay.

Incredible. Thank you, Justin McRoy's incredible body. First off, I got to toss a couple meteors. I've only gone through, I think, four of ten. So I got to check a few more meteors at these idiots. So do I do my D-10 to see how many I can hit? Yes, please. Okay.

It's going to be... Nine of them. Nice. Oh, this is going to be a big one. And then 2D6, uh, 4 damage. All right. So, yeah, 36 points of damage. Okay, great. Anything else?

Uh, yeah, I can take my action. Sheesh. Oh, boy. Let's do, you know, I miss my old spells. I wish I could still cast those. You still have them. Yeah. I still have them.

Yeah, you know, this is additional, not replacement. Oh, the Fearbug didn't remember that, but Justin McElroy, who was able to hold two characters in his account at one time. Well, I imagine you are actually holding both characters sheets in your hands. Yeah, and I look at the other one, which is another tab, digitally speaking. I'm going to cast, is the, okay, let me ask you this. Are the dragons above the hellhounds? They on the ground? What's the deal with the dragons?

They are larger than the hellhounds, so they are above them in stature, but they're like, they are on the same plane. Okay, perfect. Well, I will just, I'll cast Moonbeam on the Blue Dragon. Okay, great. Is that a save? That is a Constitution saving throw. That is a 15 total? No, not going to do it. Excellent. All right, so now you're going to get a delicious dollup of 7D10 damage.

Who, Boisey? Which is going to give us calculating 33 again, which seems weird. Seems low. I guess it's close to the median, actually. But, okay, so 33 points of damage. Okay, great. And then, wait, let me make sure there's no other. So that's 2D10 radiant damage.

Okay, but the beam remains. Oh, okay, great. So just so everyone can see it the way I see it in my mind's eye, the fear bulb transforms into Justin, stands a little bit taller, his eyes clear, his veins clear, and he just holds out a... skin clear skin clears muscles firm and he holds out a hand in a and justin mackleroy calls a moon beam down onto a dragon and up next is griffin mackerel um so i freed gray gray charge i love this character voice that is awesome sorry yes i guess i should do a different voice for me earth griffin speaking in this clean feed recording to my brothers and dad who are recording the adventures own podcast. Um, so, uh, I freed Gray and Gray charged chaos, right? Order. Yeah.

Order. Yeah. Yeah, he is making, attempting to make a path towards the rift. All right, I'm going to help him with that. Uh, I'm going to, I'm going to stroll on up to Gray and put a hand on his shoulder and wink at order and I'm going to cast Thunderstep again. And this time, me and gray disappear because I can bring along one willing creature of my size or smaller. Okay, great. So, yeah, I put a hand on his shoulder. We disappear and creatures within 10 feet of us must make a Constitution saving throw. Okay, great.

Within 10 feet, I'm going to say that that's just a solid, like 20 hellhounds. Oh, okay. In all directions. So I'll just make one saving throw. Please. Uh, that is an 11, wait, what kind of? Constitution. Did you throw?

Okay, yeah, that's like a 13. No, that won't do it. So they all take 35 points of thunder damage. That's 700 points of damage total. That's, okay, that's the record. And then we reappear, I can teleport up to 90 feet. Is the portal within 90 feet of us? It is not.

It's about a football field across the cavern is. Okay. So this is moved you forward. though about one third of the way. Okay, well. So a pretty big jump. Once we land 90 feet forward, I'm guessing in the middle of some shit, I'm going to push gray to the ground. And as a bonus action, using a little bit more quick and spell meta magic, I'm going to cast the strongest thunderwave I've ever cast in my entire life.

Okay. What's that look like? me what it looks like, Griffin. Don't just tell me the rolls. I want the numbers, baby. I'm going to pictures. I push, I push gray down to the ground and I say, you're going to want to be low for this.

And I reach my hands out to my sides in a T pose. And as I bring them together, it's like I'm crashing two storms into one another. And the sound is bad for everyone who hears it within 300 feet. It's bad for everyone. I apologize to Justin McRoy and Clint

McRoy and myself, Griffin MacRae. I'm probably not ready for this. So everyone within a 15-foot cube of me now needs to make a constitution saving throw again. Okay. Um, the, let's see, the green dragon succeeded. Okay. And the blue dragon and the hellhounds failed. Wow, that's a satisfying sound. Well, the Blue Dragon and Hellhounds are going to take 29 points of damage, and the Green Dragon is going to take half that. And they are all going to be pushed 10 feet away from me. So I'm making a, sorry, whoever succeeded, the Green Dragon isn't pushed, but all the Hellhounds within a 15-foot cube of me are knocked away 10 feet. And I tap gray on the shoulder and I say, I made a bit of a path for you.

I made a path for you, bud. Griffin, roll a D-10 for me real quick. Okay. That's a seven. Okay, great. So seven times 29 is how much damage you do to the hellhounds. Okay, come back to me in a minute. I'll run some numbers on that.

That's going to be... I got it right here. So three? 203. It's 203 by my calculations. Thank you, John. Justin. Four times 203 is 812.

What? Well, we said it four times. Okay, great. At this point, just in case anybody was wondering, about 30% a little bit more has been obliterated of the hellhounds. So that's a little over 300 hellhounds have been cleared out as you go. Can I talk as a free action? You sure can. Okay.

Hey, you two strangers who I think are still. My friends, we gotta get great to the portal so he can call off the hellhounds. There's no point fighting a thousand bad demon dogs, huh? Griffin? Yeah, okay. And up next is the Blue Dragon, who now is going to turn towards this created circle here in the center.

And they are going to take a bite at you. but they're Snippers. They're to protect you again. What do you want Snippers to do? Grab it by the jaws and pull it away from us. Okay, make a, well, it's a saving throw, right? Oh, yeah, that Blue Dragon fails. So now we have a bit of a kaiju fight.

Oh, but Twix the Blue Dragon and Snippers and Snippers has it in its grasp. Cool. So up next is order And order now is getting pretty P-Oed They put their hands together And spread them out And a blade-shaped planer rift spreads from between their hands

And shoots across the cavern And I want You three and Gray Are going Well, it's going to be a melee attack against each of you. Oh, fuck. It's going to hit all of you.

It's 15 plus 8, 23. And you're going to take 4D12 force damage. Five, eight, 10, 14. Yeah, so you're all going to take 14 points of damage. Okay. And then, suddenly the scene changes again. we're looking at a diorama. Miniatures of Argo, the Fearbulg, and Fitzroy face hand-painted hellhounds and dragons led by a pewter wizard standing in for order.

The rest of this round is uneventful. Now we're back and you're animated. You've never experienced anything like this before. If only the rest of the world could experience how amazing an animated adventure zone is. If you all clap together, all of your powers and ability, these remain the same and the battle continues. Up next is Gray and now with his pathway clear to swing

that big old mall. Oh, but they're going to miss. They're going to miss. Gray is going to miss. So then it is the Hellhounds turn. The Hellhounds are going to move in on you Fitzroy and they're going to bite at you. Yeah, do it.

Yeah, they're going to hit you. Okay. And get you for Um Not much Nine points of damage Oh well let's see if I

Yeah actually And I'm going to reflect back Fifteen points of damage at them Okay roll a D10 for me A D10 Ah just a two Okay Yeah so you hit them for 30 points of damage

Okay And up next is the green dragon Who is now also going to take a bite At Fitzroy Oh Fitzroy Roll a Constitution Saving Throw for me. I forgot to make you do that earlier. 16 plus 622.

Okay, yeah, you pass. So no poison damage taken. Good. Yeah, they're going to get you in a bite. But not bad. You're going to take five points of regular damage. And you're going to take 11 points of poison damage. Okay.

And up next is Argo. I would just like to point out that even though I didn't get to play as myself, the appearance of Clint McElroy a few minutes ago officially constitutes the appearance of Clint McElroy, he who walks the plane. While I appreciate that, Dad, I think you've already been in graduation three times. Right. Yeah. Is a different character unrelated to you, Dad? Clint McElroy is a janitor

and you are a, I guess, failed DJ. It was fired. I'll do my own backstory. Thank you very much. Discursed local DJ. Yeah, it's not. This is a biography, baby.

So then I could meet myself. Oh my God. Yeah. And fall in love with yourself. That ship is sale, pal. Huge miscarthity. Okay. I'm going to

I'm going to release the Kraken. Hell yeah. Okay, so you are going to pick an area five-foot circle, and basically you call to the water in the earth, and it is going to create a whirlpool beneath the feet of the creatures in that circle, and they have to pass a pretty high deck save, where they're going to take 2-8 damage and be not prone, and that's a bonus action.

So you do that and then you still have the rest of your turn. All right. Okay, well, that's what I do. And I do it to the Green Dragon. All right, excellent. Oh, yeah, no, they fail. So now they're going to take two D8 damage. So roll 2D8.

That would be a 4 and a 6. That's 10. 10 points of damage. Excellent. They fall prone. And because they are so large. Yeah, they're going to squish two hailhounds as they fall. Oh, for another 10 points of damage to those hellhounds.

So is it prone now? It is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so it's like laying in a giant pool of water? Um, it's like down on its knees. It's dragon knees, I guess. Um, and the water, the ground is wet below it, yes. Not quite a pool of water, but like, you know, mud, you know, water in the dirt. There's water there. Okay.

Um, yeah. I have never been more allowing than I am right now. You do whatever the fuck you want, my dad. In that case, I'm going to cast shape water on the water around it from the whirlpool and freeze it. Roll a D20 for me. That is a nine. I have an advantage. On what?

You don't even know what I'm doing? So basically, on the Dragon Store, and it's going to have to roll better than a nine to break free of that ice when it's standing. All right, then I'm going to use Tides of Chaos and roll again. Okay. Let's get that good number, Dad. Let's get that high number. Yeah, get that good number. That dragons can't beat it?

Yeah, make a remember. A number that the dragon sees it and sheds, nope. Seven. Okay. So the dragons are going to have to beat that if they try to break the ice next time. There's a chance that that won't happen. Yeah. Okay.

So now it's your turn still. Okay. I'm going to cast Chaos Bolt on the green. Green Dragon. You hurl an undulating, warbling mass of chaotic energy at one creature in range, make a range spell attack against the target. On a hit, the target takes two D8 plus one D6 damage. You choose one of the D8s and that says what kind of damage. And when you cast this spell using a spell slot of second level or higher, each target takes one D6 extra damage of the type roll for each slot level. There's that high roll. It is a 17.

plus 10, that's 27. Oh yeah, that hits. Okay, so then I do 2D8. Uh-huh. It is a 1 and 4. I did that role to be able to determine what kind of damage it does. Okay. Okay, so it's 2D8 thunder damage.

Here goes 2D8, and that is 2 and 1, a whole 3. Uh-huh. And then a D6. Oh, this is a six, but I've got to roll two more. So nine total so far. Nine plus, wow. 12, 21. 21 points of damage.

I roll three sixes. Yeah, that's amazing. Okay. So, up next is Justin McRoy. But first, I'm going to need all three of you to once again roll two D20s for me and tell me what those numbers are. Eight and a nine. So Griffin, for the next minute, you regain four. five hit points at the start of your turn.

Okay. And you become invisible for the next minute. That will end when you attack or cast a spell. Gotcha. I got a 7 and a 20. Okay, you glow with bright light in a 30-foot radius for the next minute. Any creature that ends its turn with him five feet of you is blinded until the end of its next turn. And you can take one additional action immediately.

Great. How far am I from Order? No, sorry, from Gray. At this point, I believe they jumped forward 90 feet And they were already a little bit of Freddy So I'm going to say like 100 feet. Have there any trees in the cavern?

Hmm. Roll a D20 for me? 13. You have only to think it And the chaos magic around you Mixed with the call of the earth beneath you forms reality to your will. And the forest above you, the unknown forest above you,

if we could see a cross-section of the earth, we could see the trees above their roots reaching down to then grow other trees connected to them. As above, so below, we see a forest of trees growing through the roof of this cavern, creating a doppelganger, unknown forest, hanging upside down from the roof, covering the whole area.

All right, I'm going to cast tree stride and leap into the nearest tree and reappear from the tree closest to gray. Okay, great. Yeah, now you are next to gray. Okay. That was my bonus action. Okay, great. Dad roll 2D20 for me? It would be a 10 and a 5.

Okay, great. For the next minute, all your spells with a casting time of one action have a casting time of bonus action. And you grow a long beard made of feathers that remains until you sneeze. Oh, man. That's really going to be, that's the key that's going to unlock Argonaut's full potential. You look up at the crowd in the stands surrounding you. Wait, have those always been there?

Well, they seem to be cheering for you, so it doesn't really matter. All your powers and abilities remain the same, and the battle continues. Up next is the Fearbulk. Oh, you mean Justin McElroy? No, you're back to the Fear Bold now. Oh, excellent. Well, okay, first, did the Blue Dragon move? The Blue Dragon did not move.

Okay, that was foolish. I would not have done that. If I had been the Blue Dragon and my flesh was being scorched by an incredibly powerful and destructive moonbeam, I, me, I'm going to move. Right. Well, there's so much going on, you know, with the chaos, the animation, and then, you know, being a figurine for a moment. I mean, every time I'm going to move that. Yeah, no, I understand. But that's why you, Justin McRoy are so much better than a Blue Dragon, really.

All right. Well, tell that dumbass. He's going to do a Constitution savings through. That is a 15? No. Okay. So that's going to be... Oh, this one looks good.

47. Fuck. Who boy. Yeah, he really wishes he had moved as the moon beam basically met. He mounts him and he falls to the ground dead. All right. That's one. Wow.

One down. Well, I guess one's on. You got the red one too. Oh, yeah. But the red one's out. So which one did you just kill? The blue one. That wasn't even Justin's action.

No. No. No, that wasn't. What is this? Two more meteors fly at, which dragon is still up? The green dragon. The green dragon. I'm going to shoot two meteors at the green dragon.

Green Dragon. Okay. So that's a Dex. Nope. They failed. Seven points of damage. Excellent. Now, I guess your action.

Oh, actually, I would do two of those because I shot two meteors at it. Oh, okay. Yep, yep, yep. So let me do another one. And that's another eight and nine points of damage. Excellent. And now your action. I put my hands on gray shoulders and I say...

This will feel weird. And then we both turn into gas. Oh, boy. I cast wind walk. Yeah, okay. He now has a flying speed of 300 feet. Do you too? Uh, yeah.

Sick, bro. Okay, great. Um, well, he is not up yet. Griffin, you are up. Oh, wait, heal me for 3D10. Wait, hold on, wait, everyone stop. Stop the Dungeons and Dragons. I should have also done my mother nature heel on the J-Man.

That's 15 points. Okay, great. Okay, thank you. Yes, so gray is now a gaseous cloud. Correct, yes. Okay. I'm going to step in front of the gray cloud and the Fearbolt cloud and sort of put myself directly between them and the portal.

And I am going to call down lightning from the sky, and then I'm going to hold my hand out in front of me and shoot a lightning strike 100 feet long and five feet wide. Okay. Every creature in the line must make a dexterity saving throw. Well, Griffin, I don't know if you remember. but you are invisible. Oh, yeah.

And so when you cast this, it appears to come out of nowhere. And so I'm going to say all of the hellhounds in front of you are just going to fail that one there because they are taken absolutely and completely by surprise. As you hear this hum, what one might expect if you got too close to like a power plant. Right. Except literally the plants above you seem to be generating the power. you hear crackles as electricity, lightning, fires from the trees above you,

all centered on one point. And for those observing, it seems to be empty space until it strikes the figure of Fitzroy Maplecourt and then arcs out of his hands, shooting a beam of lightning. Not just an arc or a bolt, but a beam of lightning, clearing a path towards order for the clouds.

to move. So that's going to be 40 points of lightning damage. The sound of 12 virtual dice rolling at the same time is not great.

And then for good measure I'm going to back up a little bit. Wait, real quick, Griffin. Yeah. Roll 2D20 for me. Oh, wow. It's a big spell. They were all surprised. 11 and 19.

Okay, yeah, you hit 30 worth of Hellhound with this. So what was the damage there? It was 40 damage to 30 hellhound, so 1,200 damage, I believe? Correct. Okay.

Having thoroughly slaughtered these bad, awful demon dogs, I want to take a step back and say, Fly, you fool. And I'm just going to cast Gust as a bonus action using Quicken Magic on the gray cloud To just kind of give him a little, pull a little mustard on him to launch him toward the portal. So the cloud of gray perils forward,

flying at a speed you never would have thought possible. As he nears the rift, Order's right hand shoots out, and suddenly the cloud clears and Order is holding him by the throat. And you hear the voice of order echo through the chamber.

Enough! And the remaining. Manning monsters stand down and part and open up a passage, and they all stand by the sides. And Order says, I think we have wasted enough time on this. You may feel powerful, but have you forgotten that chaos and I share the same well? And suddenly you feel the borrowed godhood drain from your bodies. You feel it all. Every wound, the exertion of the battle, it hits you in a way.

wave. And they say, I am in control. The only thing you've accomplished is delaying the inevitable by five minutes. You've made no difference except to slightly annoy me before I erase you from existence. Now little flies cease this buzzing in my ears. Not much left to do now. And a voice from behind you says, order, you have done enough. Not far from Wiggins staff school for heroism and villainy is a town called Hope. It's the final stop before one reaches the unknown forest and the, well, what used to be known as the godsgar chasm. And due to this, it has been nicknamed Last Hope by the locals. Within Last Hope is a hospital. And if one looked hard enough,

You could find a small plaque praising the work of a Fearbol, a Half Elf, and a Janassi and helping save the building from an imp infestation. But we aren't looking that hard. Instead, our focus is drawn by a child in the window. In turn, their focus is on what is outside the window. A monster of nightmares approaches. The child is frozen in fear. They've had this dream many times.

tears form in their eyes, but they do not start falling just yet. You see, sometimes in the dream, a hero swoops in just in time and saves them from the monster. However, because of what you did at the Heroic Oversight Guild, no hero arrives. But a bartender does, and a lawyer, and a pair of shopkeepers, even a cheesemonger imp. They take their positions between the monstrosity and the hospital, just hoping to buy enough time for the patients to evacuate. In the once glisting city of prosperity, people attempt to flee. The threat is ever growing, but still, there are those who choose to stand and fight. A chef, a hairdresser, a barista, a security guard, the head of a mailroom, countless others.

across the world the scene repeats. Some with the title of hero choose to help, even some with the label villain protect those in need, but they stand shoulder to shoulder with farmers, and long-haul caravaners, and hench people, and accountants, and sidekicks. There are those that the system has labeled as evil because they didn't play within the established rules, but in this moment, none of that matters.

You see, your actions, your choice, created a void. And into that void came people from every walk of life, not from money or fame or even out of obligation. There are people doing the right thing because it is the right thing to do. And somewhere, somewhere that may not even really exist, a balance has shifted.

Chaos steps past you to stand before order, and it might be a trick of the light, but they appear to be taller than order. And then you see, it's not a trick. The size difference continues to increase in realization crosses Order's face, then fear. In a panic, Order attempts to finish their work. Hey, everybody, better look out. The Thunderman's in town.

I cast Prestigitation and I start juggling tour. the fear bulb juggling lights nodding at the fear bulb like, huh? And the thundermen come down the mountain. But I... And we, and you know that you're not singing with me, the song. Oh, oh. And the thundermen come down the mountain.

Down the mountain. Not you. And we will be victorious. I nodded at Argo, like. We're distract. This is a distraction. And coming down the storm, the great clouds rolling in. You will know that the thundermen have come to town again.

And I used tell, and Argo uses telekinesis to hurl the, the serpent's tooth at order. And time freezes for just a second. And chaos looks at you and says, I'm not going to stop you, Argo. They deserve this and I deserve this too. We're still linked, Order and I. And if you kill Order, it will kill me.

But like I said, that's your decision to make. Well, Buzz Kill. I have an idea. Okay. Tell you what, chaos. We'll flip a coin for it. That seems like something you'd agree with, yes. I'm not really in a place to argue.

And I do like games and chance. So, deal. Heads, the knife takes purchase in the soil of orders back. Tails, you're fine. The end. And we don't see, like cut to black and we don't see... No. It was, it was, Tails.

Well, you won't regret sparing me. I have learned, I've learned a lot in these last couple days, and I am sorry. Now let me set a few things right. Chaos snaps their fingers. and the edges of the rift begin to recede, and you see order begin to panic and push like a child trying to stop the tide from washing away their sand castle.

And gray is released and speeds towards the rift and barely a breath after he breaks its surface. The white fades from the eyes of the remaining demons, and they retreat to their home dimension. In fact, across Nua, we see the demons retreat. And order begins to beg. Chaos, please. It's the only way.

And chaos says clearly. And then order looks at the three of you and laughs and says, it doesn't matter. Nothing you've done matters. Don't you see? You're insignificant. I am eternal. All I have to do is wait till my time.

turn. And then when it's my turn, I'll begin this all over again. The actions of mortals do not matter. You dance to my tune. Everyone notices that the Fearbulg has quietly tied a ball of yarn to order. and he's holding the other end of the string and the fear bog says go to hell it's the navigational yarn it's a ball of golden yarn that helps the user find their way

the user simply holds on to one end of the string tells the yarn where they're going and drops the ball while they're holding onto the string the ball of yarn will speedily roll in the intended direction leaving a trail for the user to follow once said the location is reached the yarn will coil itself back back into a ball. The yarn can be used once per day.

The yarn ball rolls through the rift and order looks at you and then sparks and says, it's, what did you think that this would do? That the yarn would pull and then they're pulled off their feet. And you can see through the rift, Gray has wrapped the other end of the yarn around his hand and is just slowly pulling the yarn and dragging order into his realm. And then Gray says, Fear, bogue, you shouldn't have. Oh, you already got me home and now a present? I'll tied up with a bow.

Oh, you have all, can I tell you something? I know it might not have seen this way, but you were always my favorite. This is fair. Hey! And as order is being dragged through the rift, they look at chaos and says, you cannot survive without me. We are two halves of a whole. You need me.

And chaos says, no, I think I've earned some time to myself. I'll come get you when I'm ready. And Gray snaps his fingers. And an army of demons comes and wraps order and chains and drags them away. Chaos will you be okay in a separate body you have shared till now, yes? Yes, this is, I will admit, a slightly uncharted territory. I'm pretty sure it will be fine for the time. being. I don't believe this to be a permanent

solution. Eventually, we will be drawn back together. And in the meantime, admittedly, I think my power will be greatly reduced. But perhaps that's best for now. Well, boys, it's been just a whole heck of a lot of fun. Um, I guess I'll be seeing you. you may keep my mall, gray, and let it be a reminder to you that if you do come back to our realm to try to subjugate us, it would be pretty rude to do it with my own weaponry. So let that be a sort of deterrence.

Like, it's been real and it's been fun and it's been real fun, but I hope I never see you again because if I do, it means that you're invading. Ah, yes. The ultimate weapon, and this is really the lesson of task graduation. The ultimate weapon is manners. Yep. And I think that's a beautiful message. Well, I probably won't invade. I did make a promise, but I'm also a demon prince.

Right. But you're my best friend, and I did promise you, so I probably won't. I thought I was your favorite. You're my favorite, but he's my best friend. But you're my favorite. You are a dark creation. Yeah. Okay, I probably won't invade.

Is that good enough? Yeah, you're starting to sound like Gary. I think you've spent a little bit too much time in Nua. Yes, I'm going to, I don't know, maybe go invade a different realm now. Okay, but can it be a bad realm with, like, evil folks in it? For my best friend, I'll try. I mean, it's still... Good travels to the Haterverse.

Exo, Xo, Xo, um, bye. I'm leaving now. Goodbye. Any last words? Bye. No, you don't want to say I'm your best friend? Oh, my God. You don't...

Where do I fit into this? I'm nobody's best friend. You're my son, Argo. Whoa! Okay, bye! And the riff slams show. Cannon. Chaos is gone when you turn around.

Work to do, you assume. and I would say you've earned yourself a long rest. In fact, I would say very long rest. And you sleep for what feels like a week. The world has changed so much in those few days. You're not sure how the rhetoric got started, but somehow the whole world seems convinced that the entire event is the heroic oversight guild's fault.

Whispers have spread rapidly that the Commodore, in an attempt to steal the hog's vast wealth, caused a magical explosion deep in the bowels of their HQ, and whether they believe it or not, the rulers of Nua know for certain that the hog didn't seem to lift a finger to deal with the crisis. The various chapters of the Unbroken Chain have voted nearly unanimously that they needed to put aside their veil of secrecy, at least for the time being, and publicly help repair the damage and calm the fears of the population. Althea and Barb have been working with the local governor to distribute aid and assign teams to deal with the most urgent damage. They make a great team, and it's fairly obvious that there is potential for this to turn

into a more permanent assignment. Sir Reginald Fisillip has waited around to make sure you recovered and to make sure that the efforts to clean up are going well. And then he shares a few official words. It's hard to tell if he's making them up on the spot or not regarding your resignation. Then he and the Army of Goodcastle disperse, returning to their homes. During the, well, let's call it what it was, the chaos, most students headed home to help or went where they were needed. Only a handful have remained, but then I suppose it wouldn't be accurate to call them students anymore. When the dust cleared, true to his word, Hieronymus declared the school officially closed. He and his brother Higomis are preparing to restart

their previous lives of wandering adventurers. Most of the garries have settled in the unknown forest. A few have stuck around, though, to see everyone off. Thankfully, Hegelmiss remembered to turn Leon back into a human. He and Buckminster have reunited and are making plans to return to Buck's home kingdom. A literal army of skeletons of all shapes and sizes, led by Rainier and Gordy, have been working round the clock to clean the area and remove any leftover battle debris. Festo and Gordy also made sure the Zorn got home safely and promised that they would drop him a Gmail if they ever visited. the elemental plane of earth.

Rainier sees you emerge, bleary-eyed, from your tent, and makes her way over. Hey, so, I mean, I guess everything worked out, it seems? I think all my bones are broken. Oh, boy.

And I was wondering if your dad could do like a skeleton switcheroo in there. Oh, um, that's not really how like necroman fancy words? Take all my shattered bones that I sacrificed for the good of the world, remove those, and plop one of these spare skeletons in there.

Is this you wanting to change your height again? No. Change, you've been doing bones stuff for so long and you're telling me you can't do me this one bone's favor. No, we could do it. You would just die in the process. Well, I don't want that. Yeah, I thought that might be a bit of a turnoff. So, what happened down there?

Oh, we briefly became as like gods. Okay. No, we are not. Okay. We were also like cats for a minute. Wait, what? Yeah. I was a very handsome, entertainer, strong, powerful, sinewy.

Indeed. Okay. Perfect hair. My entertainer was a fragile little porcelain doll of a man. Huh. Okay. And I was an old guy. Oh, I bet that that's not true.

With not nearly as nice a haircut. Sounds fun, actually. Was that fun? In hindsight. Infunish. Okay. So are we safe now from like the army of demons and the evil gods and stuff? Hmm.

safer? Yeah. Certainly safer than we were last week, definitely. Safeish. Yeah. Safe fish. Well, so I suppose you guys are like heroes. Like, not like, you know, not like title, you know, like job type, but like actual factual heroes?

All right. Well, you said it. We didn't say it. You said it. And other people, lots of people are saying it. Like everyone's saying it. I hear it around these. But we didn't say it.

it. So I guess. I don't know. Who cares? You know, it's just labels and whatever. Well, we're just about done cleaning up here. What do you say we all like head the last open, you know, like party? That sounds good. I, I need to break up with a king, I think. And I don't know the formal way of to, you know what? Let's, I'm overthinking this. And I've got to get my social situation straightened out because it seems like I've done the whole three's company thing of booking multiple dates on the same night. Master Fearbug, are you ready to party? Absolutely. Now, this is normally the part of the story where I would tell you what happens to the three of you.

But the truth is, I don't know. You've proven time and again that the only path you follow is your own. So instead, I'm going to take a page. out of the big book of business and ask you each the same question. Where do you see yourself in five years? Oh, boy. It's a great question.

Where does anybody see anybody in five years? And that's my answer. Thanks, everybody. I hope you enjoyed this season of the Adventures in. No, I think Fitzroy tries out a lot of stuff after the big climactic battle. I definitely think he keeps his head on a swivel. I think he was very gung-ho about the plan to disrupt the entire sort of social structure of this world.

And then while he was doing it, he realized I'm going to, I'll get in trouble for this. I guess that's my question to you. Did we ever get in trouble for destroying the social hierarchy of the planet? So with the rumors going around that this was more or less the result of the Heroic Oversight Guild's lack of regulation, and that a lot of it was laid at the feet of the Commodore. Somehow the involvement of U3 got very much swept under the rug. There's plenty of folks out there who were on, like, on hand during that day of the Herodog Oversight Guild infiltration slash heist. Right.

And, you know, they talk about like, yeah, there was this janitor there and somebody with like a bag thing. and there were all these bees around suddenly. But in all the chaos of like the ensuing days, everybody kind of lost track of exactly who they were looking for. And you know what? In fact, go ahead and roll an insight check for me. Okay. Yeah.

You weren't expecting that here on the postscript, were you? Make us fucking roll in the epilogue? I know. My dog says one on it. But that can't be true. there's so many higher number than that on this dice. Yeah. It's almost like there is some other force who work here,

but you have no idea what. I think we're the one I do always kind of have to keep an eye out. For nothing, maybe, but I'm always like looking over my shoulder a little bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, I go to, I definitely think I morph sort of formally break off, break ties with good castle. And I think that that's probably okay since I never technically started that gig. And then I don't think that Fitzroy is quick to, you know, jump into the wondering hero life or anything along those lines.

I think he sort of explores his post-collegiate options, as is the norm. definitely some modeling on the side with Boy Cloaks Magazine. Definitely, yeah. Definitely do some, develop that brand with Rainier for, you know, small woodland creature cloaks fashion for animals. Yeah, definitely. But not in the shitty way we do it on earth, where it's like, here's a vest for a dog.

Like, these animals look fucking great. Yeah. And all of them are doing it by choice. You know what I mean? Sure. I become independently wealthy as a result, but I mean wildly independently wealthy. I didn't, this is my first time doing one of these and I'm drunk on power. I get fucking so rich.

Okay. Well, it also helps that you came back from the elemental plane of earth with a bag full of diamonds. That helped. It was nice seed money for my venture. So, you know, I help out my folks. My dad is finally able to retire from long haul trucking and explore. or his career as a jazz guitarist. Oh.

And my mom starts, starts her own sort of YouTube cooking channel that takes off. Cool, dude. Yeah, I mean, it's everything, everything sort of... Everything really works out for a fits right, it sounds like. Grow a nice, grow a nice beard. Oh, nice.

Yeah. They're the best. The best beard. And I think, I think towards the end of, it, I want to, um, I want to stop by, uh, Sylvia Knight's office. Okay. Can we do that? Yeah, let's do it. Oh, sir Fitzroy, right? Um, actually, it's just plain old Fitzroy. Plain old Fitzroy. Sorry, plain old Fitzroy, model entrepreneur, and former hero of all mortal kind. Excellent. Have you come to turn me into a catfish once more or?

Actually a carp this time. And I was wondering if that's, no, I wasn't planning on it. No, I just realized that I still had this. And I turn in my very, very old uniform for Clyde Knight's Night Night School and a shield that sort of comes with the ensemble that I got when I first. had my orientation here. Well, this is very appreciated, but you seem to be missing the socks, so I won't be able to re-front. I've been down and take the socks off my feet and put them there. These are my luck. You'll be happy to know that these have kept me safe and warm and very lucky.

Okay, well, then you will get your deposit back on your uniform. Here's tin silver. I, uh, 10 silver. That's cute. Thank you. I put it in my pocket. I also have this, and I hand over a letter seeking admission. I see.

Well, I, hmm, I must tell you, things have changed a lot here at the school. We don't really do the hero and villain thing anymore. Oh, no, yeah. I mean, things have changed everywhere. No, this is, this is, this is, this is not for the night program or hero or villain school. I've realized something, Sylvia. May I call you Sylvia? Sure.

Great. I realize something about the whole hero system we had going on before. where we were these pillars of strength meant to defend the weak against the forces of evil. But in all that time, nobody was protecting the weak from the strong, from the people who were meant to keep them safe in the first place. This is not an application

for the hero program. I am applying to Sylvia Knight's Knight Law School. Well, there's an official review process and, you know, all of that, but between you and I, welcome. Excellent. We begin immediately. What is it? So what is law even?

No, it's 6 p.m. You can start in the morning. I heard something about jurisprudence. Explain this. Okay. Oh, boy. Is habeas corpus as spooky as it sounds? Yes.

Okay, Fearborg. What about you? Where's the Fearbug now in the far-flung five-year future? Well, I want to, before I get to that, I want to do a sort of set up for that. Okay. Briefly after. I think in the short term, I mean, the, Fearbolg wandered for a time and then began starting to feel pretty desperately lonely

because it's so against his sort of nature to one day he sat himself in a meadow with a small pile of berries and he pulled the tiny Gary out of his knapsack. Gary, how do you fare? Pretty good for haven't been in a pocket for a really long time. This is unfair of me. You should have a parche. No. No, it's fine.

It's dark and quiet. Giving me time to really think about Gary, you know. Yes, I have begun to think about Gary as well. Wait, you've been thinking about me? Well, holistic Gary. Oh, the Gary of the mind. Sure. I've been thinking, Gary.

How are you all doing? Well, as far as I can tell, we're fairly happy. You know, we're making a life. Well, they are, I should say, in the unknown forest. And, you know, I still feel connected to them even though I'm not with them. you know, that connection is not about a distance, you know what I mean? Gary, I don't know as much as I'd like to about Gary's. But from your perspective, would you say that all Garys are equal?

You know, that's a, it's a tough question. Yeah, all Garys are equal. we may have, you know, different ideas about things and some different opinions, but it doesn't change the fact that, you know, one Gary to another, we don't consider any one of us better than the other one. Gary, I have tried to be fear. I was cast out because I had different thoughts from. the other fearbook. I can't change that thing. But Gary, I need a clan.

I am alone, Gary, and I do not wish this to be. So I'm thinking that maybe I would be Gary. Oh boy. Yeah, you know, we can maybe do that on like a trial basis. Make you like a temporary Gary? A temper Gary, if you will? I know that I cannot share your mind, but if you would offer me, if you would have me, I swear that I will have your honor over mine. My blood shall be your blood in a bravery, effort, and honor I will bring, shall account for the fact that I was not born.

the Gary. I will give a thousand for nothing and my truth will honor the Gary's. Master Fearborg, I speak on behalf of the Gary's when I say, I name thee Gary. I think it is very nice to have a name. So good. So, that's good. So now five years later, where is Gary? Where is Gary? You mean holistic Gary? Sure. Yes, the Gary of the mind.

We're great. We have... I can say this now. I mean, personally, I think that we have really improved on the Fearbug formula. It's one where bravery and honor and effort are still, like, wicked important, but also, like, investment and having a 30-year time horizon for those investments and being able to assess our assets and evaluate the worth of those assets with a longer-term time horizon than just making it to the winter has made us very fruitful. It helps that they don't eat. So like we've got a huge

the overhead on garries is so great. So we basically are kind of like, financial advisors. We come to other clans or other families or other groups that are having struggles, making ends meet, and we try to set them right with a zero overhead workforce and a team of really smart financial planners that all share one goal. And that goal is, well, I mean, it's a hive mind. So of course they all share one goal. But that goal is setting you on the road to fiscal stability. Hey, Todd, I heard the, I heard the Mrs. is pregnant. Congratulations.

Yeah, thanks, thanks. You know, we're a little nervous. It's so much to plan for, you know, with a kid on the way. Well, you got yourself a Gary, right? A Gary? No, what? Yeah, Gary, you got to get yourself a Gary. You know, me and Susan, we got ourselves a Gary.

Oh, we've been working with him now for about two years. We paid off our debts. We own the home now. Really? Well, that's amazing. Yeah, and I was able to save a little. or get myself a little boat. That's incredible.

Where can I get myself, Gary? Well, you just need to go to the forest, and then you whisper the name of Gary, and you prey on the wind, and the Gary will arrive at your house within 48 hours. Well, thanks. Oh, excuse me, I couldn't help it over here.

I should mention the 48 hours is not a guarantee. We do do our best, but there are a finite number of us, Gary's. What about you? Sorry, I was using the wind. Okay. So Argonaut, last but certainly not least.

What's Argonaut's life post, you know, the chaos battle? What are we looking at? I think Argo decided that even though he didn't spend one second of the entire arc on any kind of water. that he was going to return to that life on the sea. But, you know, the whole pirate thing just kind of didn't feel right. So he's going to take the boat that he renamed the Fearboat after the Fear Bowl. Yes. And is going to turn it into a cruise ship.

Oh. It takes people on cruises. and it's kind of a theme thing. You know, like, the Disney cruise lines has, are we allowed to say that? Can you say the word Disney? Sure. You should say something else that rhymes with it.

So just say Disney from now on. Yeah, that'll be, that would be worse, I think. Yeah, what about Wisney? I don't know. I don't know why that'd be worse. But the whole theme of the cruise is to, he was so impressed with the Fear Bowl lifestyle. that he's crafted the whole thing.

So people who want that Fearbulge experience set sail on the Fearboat. And now, Dad, I'm sorry, but I do need you to clarify. When you say the Fear Bowl of your experience, what is that, what kind of programming are we looking at here? Well, I think it's all going to come very clear in the theme song that has been developed. Oh, no.

Go on. So I have a theme song. Hold on, hold on. Everybody, give him room. Scoot back, scoop back. He's going to use his hands a lot during this. Stand back. Stand back. Yes? Okay. Come, we're sailing with you on this ship. Every word is true. The fear boat sharing what you have with everyone.

The fear boat. Telling what you have with everyone. The fear boat. Telling the truth is a lot of fun In this zone of adventure See narwhals and giant crabs There's lots of food Of the citrus variety Disappearing cats That you rarely see

The Fibald A big community on the sea The Fearboat A licensed subsidiary Of Thunderman LLC Yeah Jesus Powerful

We're on the deck of the Fearbolt It's five years after the chaos battle We see three figures on the deck each of them wearing a matching t-shirt that reads Thunderman LLC corporate retreat. We see a Janossi with a cat on his lap. The cat seems to be flickering in and out of existence. We see a fear bog wearing a hat with a logo emblazoned on it,

and that logo is simply a tiny stone figure with wings spread holding a bowels. bag of money. And we see a half elf. And he's having a drink delivered to him with a tropical umbrella by a shimmering golden crab. Thank you, snippers. There's no salt. I know it's a virgin margarita, but I still want the salt.

And listen, tell him to stay away from the raw bar because some of our patrons may get a little That is a good point. Snippers. I don't know if you can be eaten, but you may want to stay away from the raw bar. I love you too. So, Fear Bowl, I mean, Gary, what do you think? He's a beautiful vessel. Ethically and aesthetically.

Thank you. The lines are nice, too. Yeah. Like a big sour mess. Big, yeah. Yeah, I just wanted to pick a whole bunch of them. I do question, though, why all of the state rooms are sort of marshes and bogs and fins. Like, it seems a little, it seems a little on the nose.

I feel like one could have taken an artistic liberty to put regular beds and stuff in there. Well, I really kind of, I try to lean into the whole, you know, theme. And you know, this is just, this is just a flagship. I have, this has been pretty profitable for Thunderman LLC. You know, I've made quite a bit of money, so I applied it back. I've bought other ships. I commandeered the Commodore's Fleet. And I'm renovating them into different things.

And each one of them will have a different theme, you know, based on our adventures. Because I'm, it's really cashing in for us, really. This is great. It's like the end of Lord of the Rings when you find out, like, Bilbo's the one who's been writing it the whole time. Only instead of Bilbo writing a book for people to read, he opens a cruise line based on their adventures. We've all become extremely successful entrepreneurs. As was, I assume that would be our trajectory post-heroedom. But do you all ever miss sort of getting me? your hands dirty and trying to make some good in a more direct way. I haven't really thought about it. I mean, I've been pretty busy.

You know, there's, you know, taking care of all the payments and, you know, barnacle scraping. I haven't really thought about it. Beautiful? Gary? I miss fighting. there is a very little need for fighting in the fiscal realm. I didn't think I would miss it, but I like to fight. It's weird.

Weird for fearboat, but not for Gary. Yes, there's few opportunities to fight when you're enrolled in law school, like I am, a law school student who reads big smart guy books now. Well, the reason you brought it up, you must miss it too. right? Oh, you miss it? Certainly. And what's that over the deck?

A cracking? A two-ar! No, I don't think I'm glad. The Thunderman will return next season in. Graduation two. Graduation. I miss the fight, but mainly I... You know what I miss?

I miss routine. I miss knowing every day I would wake and have my berries with you two in the cafeteria and then we would go to class and I miss this. Yeah, the adventure, the heaping of praise upon us. I do miss that, I guess, but at the end of the day, I think I just miss you two. Oh, this is very kind. It's very sweet. And I miss you.

Oh, and I miss you too, Fitzroy, and I'm going to open up another cruise ship that's based on you next. Wow, that's awesome. Who said, who said this? Who was that? That was you. Oh, it's all. Well, I just said that.

I said I was going to open up other cruise lines with you. guys's themes. Did I not say that? I mean, you didn't really give it, you know, a timeline. Well, you know, here's what I've been thinking. You know, Fearbog, if you wanted to oversee the fearboat and Fitzroy, if you wanted to oversee a boat based on you, I really have thought about taking the Commodore's boat and using the cruise line as like a front for piracy.

Because I am a rogue. I'm a rogue. I love all this. The one issue I have is my involvement at all. I am very busy with the garris. You two are very dear to me, but I do have quite a lot of work day in, day out. It's been a long road, a winding road,

full of twists and turns, trials and tribulations, but at last it's come to an end. I got you, Argo. And I stand up and I'm wearing a wire. No, I'm not. That would be a hell of a thing. It would be. I guess it might help me.

I've been struggling with maritime law. It may help me to learn about it if I break it a little bit. I love this. Could you promise that we only sort of steal from those who exploit the folks, the hardworking folks of Nua and not steal from, you know, just like a ship that has some cows on it or whatever? Is that a deal breaker? Kind of. I, I, um, I, um, I, um, I, um, I, have retod. I will be involved helping to keep this admittedly pretty wild venture on the proper fiscal course.

I will be sort of a third partner, but I'm here on the land. I think of me as a dry partner that doesn't get on the boat error again. And I am also sorry I would not let you undock the boat and that we have had to stay here with sort of the dock in sight. I don't enjoy the water, but I would love to help and keep in contact with you too. You did look a little queasy. You looked a little, especially during the lifeboat drills, I could tell that you were not digging at that moment. I actually have a great way for this all to work out. Okay.

This is Tiny Gary He will report back to me on your progress I can talk We can keep in touch this way Yes we are all Gary Let's test it out I will get on the dock

Hello I walk back towards the land You're gonna find that you walk funny On back on the dock for a few days I I think it is worth it to not be in the boat with you too but hey, I do miss you. I miss you both.

The garris are fun and kind and good, but they also share a mind so the conversations can be a little one-sided. And they have trouble harmonizing. I would imagine. And they're all connected, right? So we can, even if we have a small gary, a sea-going garray,

on our individual pirate ships, we can still talk to you anytime we want, right? Exactly. I will always be here, dry, and safe on land. You know, I think, now that you mentioned harmonizing Fear Bowl, I think the perfect way for this corporate retreat to end is for the three of you from memory to harmonize and sing the Thunderman LLC corporate theme song.

Are you ready? What do you say, guys? One time from the top. Oh, I couldn't. Please, no, I couldn't. Yeah, let's do it. From the top. Just for the little Gary, he has never heard.

Okay. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me. Do I do you want me down here? Or should I be up here? Red leather, yellow leather. If you remember, with this very special instrument you've got inside there, you are just the highest tenor that you can possibly sort of generate. This is note

Great Perfect Oh, two A two One, two, three, four Watch out your mountain Wings your Hurting

Rainstorm coming day Yob Don't get Washed away By the thunder When it comes for you For you For you

If you are a bad Bad customer If you are a monster with big tea Chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp bachm We just we really need to rethink it that part of the song I think it's stronger than it has been in the past which is so strange The bridge works the bridge really works The bridge does work

So let's bring it home now. Bring it home. And the lightning strikes. Bosh. Thunder rolls. Coming for America. You are a thunder man. Certainly not.

Certainly not that. Today. Today. Hey, where'd everyone go?