The Adventure Zone - The Adventure Zone: Steeplechase - Episode 13

Episode Date: January 26, 2023

Poppy's Pals try their hand at the clumsy art of seduction. Montrose jams up. Emerich gets familial. Beef locks up the competition.Opening monologue performed by Autumn Seavey Hicks: https://www.instagram.com/autumnseaveyhicks/?hl=enAdditional music in this episode: "When You See Me" and "Bliss of Heaven (Club Mix)" by SOMM: http://alplus.io/spotify; "Free Guitar Walking Blues (F 015)" by Lobo Loco: www.musikbrause.de; "Swimming" by Le Gang: https://alplus.io/swimming; "No End Ave" by Jahzzar: http://www.betterwithmusic.com/; and Six" by Lex Villena: https://open.spotify.com/artist/2iwj2SqGnplhDIadeJ5bmy?si=N8WYSKIPR7WUy8z4ajNSog. Happy MaxFunDrive! Right now is the best time to start a membership to support your favorite shows. Learn more and join at https://maximumfun.org/jointaz

The fun was a little bland, but if you are a fan of pickles, you're going to love this one. And we've got a very special message here from Miss Jehela Wilk's third grade class. Miss Jehela, we are all rooting for you and we watch you on Passion's Cove, even though it's on past our bedtime. We hope you get to kiss Scott Boldflex on his face and his butt all day long. Oh, that's so cute. So far this season, Jehela hasn't seemed like a big contender for Scott's love. But let's just hope she never knows when to stop dreaming. I'm sorry I seem to have overslept.

I've missed the meeting of the Rust Council. Age is a curse, but to make it 37 years is quite a blessing. Perhaps I shall while away the rest of the afternoon. Real Story. Hello and welcome to the Adventure Zone Steeplechase, episode 13. I'm trying so hard. No, don't, Travis. Oh, God, we were doing so good.

This was going to be the first episode where we just kind of vaulted right over it. I know, but it just... No, just let it go. We're playing a game. When the big twist comes and all of that stuff instantly makes sense, like it's going to be... Yeah. You guys ever seen this show numbers? Yeah, man.

favorite. How is it? Seven is great. I'm thinking about getting into it. Yeah, man. The new shit, the new shit's not quite as good as the old, old numbers. Oh, yeah. Back when it was like, you know, when they were in like four, five, six.

You can't go wrong with Judd Hirsch. You can't. Judd Hirsch, episode nine, love it. You just remember there was this period of time where you could make a show about anything. Yeah. Remember there was a time when Benjamin Linus from Lost, was like, I have a machine that knows about crime. And they were like, seven seasons.

Thank you. A person of interest. It used to be dressed and you just walked into, like, the studio and you said. So here's the thing. They're a detective and they're like, stop right there. Get in here. Go, go, go. Here's a billion dollars.

You got it, man. He's a detective and his brother knows about math. Yeah, man. He's a detective and he's a mortal? Fuck yeah, dude. He's a detective and a vampire? Hell yeah. he's a detective and he has some complex mental health issues

fuck yeah yeah twice that's gonna run 13 seasons it's Sherlock yes Sherlock yes Sherlock go yes go make it already Sherlock but at the beach yeah yeah you know Sherlock had a sister that's a movie fucking love it thank you okay so welcome to welcome back to Passion's Cove we were just about to try to win a golden music note from Scott Boldflex, the Primo Hunk on Passions Cove. And Greg, the producer Greg Jennings, has gathered you all for sort of like a pregame meeting before this evening's festivities begin. All right, guys, so here's the deal. This is going to be really open-ended.

we we basically want you to get to know Scott that this is your opportunity you know you've waited a long time for this this is your opportunity to meet your man and win his heart remember we don't have a lot of rules here it's basically just get him by any means necessary don't try to be shy and retiring don't wait for Scott to come to you he's got a lot of people that he's got to meet tonight and you know also feel free to have fun

This is a party. If you want to knock a few back or have some drinks or just kind of get a little wasted. Sorry, wait, Greg, knock a few back or have some drinks? What's the first part then? Or knock a few back or have some drinks or get a little wasted or whatever. Those are all fundamentally that you're saying the same thing. Whatever you party. Drink.

Drink. Okay. Oh, great. Should we establish ahead of time, Which one of us is going to get, like, sloppy drunk? Actually, that has already been claimed. Damn it. Yeah, Delphi is actually going to freak out a little bit,

and she is actually going to have one drink and fall asleep on the couch. So don't bother Delphi, please. What is the sort of contract say about, like, is this... I'm trying to think of a polite way to ask this. is this one of those reality competition shows where physical violence will result in the immediate expulsion from the reality competition show? 100%. Unless it's great TV. I mean, okay.

That's the other thing, folks, is, you know, we are here to make a show. That's why you're all here on Passions Cove. We're making entertainment. This is reality, but it's a heightened sort of reality. I love it. I love it. So, any other, any questions before we get rolling? What is the mode of dress?

Is this formal, semi-formal, business casual, casual? Sexy. Sexy, whatever is sexy. Makes you feel sexy. Casuals. It makes you feel comfortable in your body with your body, Scott's body. Sexy. And the boom-boom room is located where?

Do you mean the grinding gazebo? Yes, I am, I am terrible. I was thinking back of another reality dating show I was on where they did call it the boom boom room, the grinding gazebo. Oh, so you've been around the horn before. Yeah, the grinding gazebo is what we call it on our shows. It is, we do keep that locked for just sort of production safety purposes. And that is something that you're going to need. If you're holding a gold musical note at the end of the evening, you will, that's your one-way ticket to pleasure. A golden musical note. Yeah, that's what we do. Like a trophy?

It's like, it's like a rose. Okay. Is it just basically a rose? It's like a rose. I understand. Okay. That would be a weird trophy to hand out, though, because rose is, like, eventually, like, you know,

kind of dry out and rot away and stuff. That's beautiful. Who are you? What's your name? Uh, my name is Johnny Shrimp Toast. Yeah. You didn't say that as quickly as most people with name. Sorry, I got surprised.

It's not like they're trying to remember their checking account number. It's more like they just answer it because it's their name. Well, it's my stage, it's my stage name. Okay, I get it now. Mine is actually Greg Jennings with three ends, but I drop one of the ends. Excellent. Wait, where's the other end? No, wait.

Greg Jennings has three ends in it, doesn't it? Two in the middle, one of the ends? Four ends is what initially. Yeah. I left the other end of L.S. I'm Greg Jennings. Greg Jennings. My grandfather was Gregory Jennings. Hey folks, the game's going along tonight. We're going to be playing extra Geninnings tonight.

If you've ever heard of Jeninings caramels, that was my grandfather. Oh, really? Excellent. Excellent. Pull your fillings right out, they will. So are we opening up with a toast or where's the action starting? We're going to start filming right this second. Oh. There's the man of the hour. I walk right up to Scott Boldflex.

Can I, uh, can I steal you away? You think maybe we could have a little one-on-one? Wait, one second. Scott's going to dress everybody first. Oh, okay, sorry, sorry. That was a, that would be a bold-ass move, though. It would be, yeah. Baller.

Hey, folks, I, oh, what? Steal me away? Uh-oh. I feel like I've seen that tactic employed. Sorry, I need to, let me connect to the Voicotron 3,000. One sec. Yeah, sure, sure. Bad news, everybody.

Scott Bolflex sounds exactly like Greg Jennings. Genening. I have now a catalog. I'm up to, according to this incredible resource that our editor, Rachel, made for me, I am up to 62 different voices. Oh, boy. Fucking dummy. We're on episode 13.

I know. That's a lot of voices, man. A lot of these people have died. Trust me. Yeah. Even if we didn't see it. You need to institute some stock voices where it's just like, hey. I do have a stock voice.

It's the one shared by Greg Jennings and Scott Bald Flex. Oh, boy. Hey, everybody. Thanks for coming. I'm Scott. Hi, Scott. Hell you. Salutation, Scott.

Hey, that's awesome. Thank you guys. I'm so excited to get to meet everybody. I have a cool announcement to make. Obviously, like, the real prize tonight. that you're going after is these and he holds up one of the shiny golden musical notes. I'm going to be

handing these out to somebody who really catches my eye tonight. And I have an even more exciting announcement. Gizmondo the portable gaming phone is back

and they are sponsoring tonight's party. Fuck yeah. Yeah. And the winner of this little soire is not just going to get a little face time with me in the grinding gazebo, but they're also going to be walking away with four sweets. Wait. What?

Yeah, we got a little extra prize money, sweeten things. I mean, that's awesome. I'd love some more scratch that I could use in my medicine investments. Yeah, so this is a score, guys. This is a score. It follows all the rules of the score. You know what you're trying to steal, Scott's heart. Um, there is a prize of four suites for a successful completion of this score. We're going to follow all the same score policies and rules. It's just a little bit more open ended than your previous scores. I'm going to tell you that there are two clocks, uh, here on my end that are not going to be public facing. Ooh. I do want to tell you what the clocks are. Okay, because I want to want to be upfront about this. Scott has a clock of his.

affections. And there is a clock for the producers seeing people making great TV. So there are the, those are the two different clocks that you, that you all are working on. Does that make sense? Yes. Okay. Who wants to see around the place? Who wants to get a quick tour?

Me, definitely. Yeah, I would love a tour as well. Okay. I didn't know which one was speaking. In that moment, that sounded. like something either Greg or... Greg's in the trailer.

Okay, cool. Greg left. You're doing your thing now. He wants this to be organic. Yes, let's shake that moneymaker and we will accompany you. Okay, so just real quick. Okay, there's the map.

I've just shared it with you. Oh. Oh, yeah. Got it. I'm looking at it. I feel like I need a moment to absorb it. Sure. So I'll just walk you through it real quick.

As you're walking through the front of the house to the right, that's the jam zone. That's where I go to just sort of unwind and just jam away. If you want to come in there and jam with me, well, we can jam all night long. Over there is the really... Just making sure, you're talking about playing music or violently cranking it? Actually, you all get it. There is no jam allowed in there. It's a sticky free zone.

Over there's the really great room. You didn't answer my question. Yeah, I would just want to get through the tour. Over there's the really great room. They said it was a great room and I was like, can you make it better? So they did. Now it's a really great room. They put some neon under the table for me and it's fucking sick now.

Hell yeah, dude. Look at this over here. And there's a faucet and he pulls it down. This is chocolate milk whenever I want it. No big deal. Over there is my parents' room. Now over to the left. Yeah, man, that's cool.

I love family too. Keep them closest, what I say. You serious? Yeah, man. How important is family to you? Let me think about it. It's basically the most important thing. Wow.

So when I mentioned my parents' names earlier in the evening, do you remember them? Yeah. What were they? Flashback to the park earlier in the evening. where this guy where this guy said his parents Did he really?

Scott Boldflex gave you his bio and this is the guy whose heart you're trying to win so I'm assuming. Yeah, I will take the stress for a flashback. Dad, did you write down

the names of this guy's parents? I think I wrote down Betty for the mom. Yeah, what was it? Betty's my mom. What was your name again? My name is is Omar.

Omar, man. That's so cool. Omar Flat Fannie. That's cool. Do you have parents, Omar? Well, I lost my mom. Nice, nice, nice. So over here, over here,

hold on, let me make a quick mark. Give me a second. Oh, that was, that was wilting. Actions that you take won't necessarily be one or the other. Some will work for both. And you're not going to have a lot of insight in it. either one of these, but you are going to have to trust me that I'm playing, I'm fair dealing with you.

Yes. But unfortunately, human beings have not yet developed a way to say that they are three-sixth attracted to you yet. Oh, we don't say stuff like that? No, no, not anymore. Oh, that explains so much. Yeah. Okay, so back to the tour.

So this one's really important to me, and especially the producers over here, and then. you see like a sort of scrim covering the entire kitchen and dining area this is actually another show it's a a Japanese reality show called I've always been here they bring in six strangers

and they become friends and lovers and they go about their day-to-day business please don't go in here okay over here is the play place which sounds sex because it is, but it's also an actual ball pit with a slide.

Fuck yeah, dude. Other things that you notice, it's not very well hidden, but in the upper right-hand corner of this map, you can see the production trailer. Justin, that is some very, I would say, sophisticated layer work you did in there. Thank you, I did it. Yeah, I just, I lowered the opacity on it,

and then I erased the parts that were overlapping the tree. Good stuff. Yeah, so it's kind of hidden behind the trees, but not very well. Uh, so that's the layout. Um, hey, uh, Scott. Yeah. Where's the gym, bro?

Oh, yeah. Over there. And he points to a place outside beyond the edges of this map. Ah, cool, man. Yeah, I use the outbuilding for it because I do some really gnarly yells when I'm wailing on my pecks. Me too, dude. Yeah. You got to let, you got to let the weakness out.

You know what I mean? Yeah. What are some of your favorite, what I'm sorry? your name again? My name is Johnny Shrimp Toast. Fuck, I'm so mad at you guys for having fake names. I'm not going to keep track of them. Johnny, just call me Johnny, man.

Hey, I always have the same last name as a service to you. Okay, okay. Yeah, Johnny, what's some of your favorite exercises? I do the chest fly. I do the hammer curls. I do dead bugs for the abs. That's a fun one, you know what I mean? And then, of course, just bench, you know what I mean?

Hey, why is, why do you feel like fitness is like important to you? Well, because this is the only body we got, man. You know what I mean? And so taking care of my body is like taking care of my mind, taking care of my soul. Because the way that we treat ourselves is how we show others to treat us. You know what I mean? So I want people to look at me and say, there's a man who cares about himself. I'm going to care about him too.

That's a pretty good answer, Trab. Why don't you give me a sway roll? But I'm not good at that, Justin. Take a bonus die. for me because you really do whale on your pecks and stuff, you're not just pulling it out of your butt. Thanks, but that's controlled. Unless me does that exercise.

You know I mean beef. Okay, because I also whale on my pegs. Oopsie doops. Was it good? I'm not over to the chat yet. Hold on, let me look. Yeah, go in look, Traff. Go look at the chat, Traff.

Fuck, dude, that's a one. See, now, Justin, can I just say, this is where this game confuses me. This is where this game confuses me, because it was a good answer It's true. Yeah, I know, man. Yeah, for sure.

It sucks. It sucks sometimes, but it's good, too. But I did a good job, and the dice failed me. Not if you have to be around. I say out loud. Okay, Travis, here's what happens with your one. With that one, you say exactly what you just said, and he's, like, slowly, like, nodding, and then you just fart.

So laugh. No. No. You just rip a huge fart. Oh, wow. Did that man have a protein powder? Did that dude just rip a huge fart? I did.

That's how comfortable I am with my man Scott here. Is that what he thinks the right reasons are? Uh-oh. Gotta talk about that later. First smellers the feller. No, man, very clearly. That's an excellent point. He, who smelt it has historically dealt it.

If I could shove you into a little. a wedge hipper, I absolutely would. Shlbethany did not enjoy your farting. Okay, well, rarely does anyone. All right, I'm going to get a little chocolate milk and maybe head out to the pool. Yeah, Scott, can I steal you away for a second, bro? I want to talk to you about some stuff.

Yeah, absolutely. I love that. Where is, uh, well, I guess I have the map. You have the map? This is, again, it is open-ended. Whatever you think might be happening here is happening. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're all in the lead here. I'm going to head to the, uh, while he's doing this, wherever the cruterte and, like, food is.

That's where beef is headed. Oh, I should mention, I have a third clock that is just a clock. Oh, yeah. It's like a clock. Like a time. And you know what? I almost don't need to do it because it is the length of this episode. Okay.

All right. Okay. Uh, when Emric is going to go to the, to meet the parents. Okay. So let's put it. So Emmerk's going to go try to find Betty and her husband. And let's start with Scott. Where do you want to lead Scott to?

How about the Jam Zone? Okay, excellent. So this is, this is it. So where the magic happens. As you walk in, you see a wall that has like eight different There's some acoustic, some semi-acoustic. About three-fourths of them look fake, for lack of a better term. They look like props, which they probably are.

Yeah. You see a couple that are real, though. There's a huge drum set. There's a zither. There's a pheromone. There's three flutes. There's, you know, a xylophone, all kinds of different jamming stuff. All right.

And he pulls up a seat. Do you want to hear something? I would love to. I thought maybe we could jam together, but like, I want to taste. Oh, that would be great. Yeah, what do you play? I play a lot of different stuff, multi-instrumentalist. Wow, that's so cool.

Yeah. I was thinking about this one, though, maybe the 12 string. Oh. Wow, that's like two guitars glued together. You know that, right? Yeah. Oh, man, yeah, for sure. I used to be in a band.

Oh, yeah? What was it called? It was called... That's punk rock. Honestly. It was called Al-Fonari. Al-Sari? That's punk.

I love that. All right, cool. Grab it. And let me get a... Let me just grab some Pataco real quick. There is a higher guitar. Have you ever seen, you know, the hooks that are screwed in the wall that you can hang a guitar on? Yeah.

It's like that, except there is a bar in front of it that is holding it in place in this little, and there's a word for it that is not a current. It's like a yoke that the guitar is hanging on. But there's a place where Scott puts his thumb. What is that thing called? I know, right? I'm looking at one right now. I know. I'm looking at one too.

What is it called? The thing. Guitar fork for hanging? There's a guitar fork, but he puts his thumb on like this one square. and the lock pops open and he takes down Sympatico and he starts playing. Can I, can I freeze frame that

and try and like clock what he did to do that? Because I would definitely be watching about as intently as is possible if he was going to undo the like mechanism here. What you could tell, from what it looked like, it was,

it seemed like a thumbprint scanner. There was a black square where he placed his thumb. Now you know it's, It's probably not a thumbprint scanner because of his nature. Because he is, yeah, I was thinking, and I got too deep in the, like, metal weeds of, like, does hard light have fingerprints? Yeah, it's kind of like biome. Whatever it is, it seems to be coded to him.

Okay. And he uses it to unlock Sympatico. So what do you want to jam on? Why don't you just start playing and I'll jump in? Okay, great. Turn it up loud, though, man. Let me tune. Let me tune out.

I'm in tune. we're chatting. So how long you've been into music? Oh, um, about, it seems like my whole life, you know? Me and my family, we, uh, we, we grew up playing music together. The band I was in was was with, was with my family. Oh. Yeah, we did all of our professional sort of work together. Shows and touring and stuff. We did it all together. And, uh, yeah, I think about those days on the road and some of the happiest days of my life. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, you really talk about, sort of yourself a lot, you know? Well, it's just you. We're also talking about family and...

Oh, yeah. Family is really important to me. Yeah. Yeah. So I have parents and, um, they have their own stuff going on. Sounds good. While this is happening, can I, uh, do a thing? Please. Um, so beef is gonna approach other Ricky.

Okay. Hey man, listen. Wait, time out. Yeah. Got to log into the voice. It's drawn 3,000 real quick. Hey, what's going on? Did I...

Is this your seat? No, man, listen. Where did you find other Ricky, Traff? Other Ricky was over also at the food table. I'm saying in the covered Lanai. Oh, okay. Beautiful, yeah. That's where a lot of the crafty is.

Yeah. Hey, listen. This is going to be good TV, other Ricky. I need to talk to you about, uh, about Evan Good party. Oh, yeah. I found out some stuff, but... Is he the one with the, uh... Is he the one with the mask?

Yeah, he's the one with the mask. We need to talk in private. Will you join me over? Uh, just follow me. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And I head towards the pool bathroom. This is the bathroom. Yeah, man.

I want to have a private conversation. It's... I mean, it doesn't get more private than the bathroom. Hey, listen. If this is one of those things where you want to pay me to watch you poop, I've done that before. I've been on that road and I can't do that on TV. This is my vacation. Like they wired up cameras in here for like a confessional thing.

So we're going to talk in here to a frequent scene. Oh, okay, wait a minute. It's for the TV show. Yeah, man. Okay, okay. Just to be clear, this production has wired up cameras in the bathroom to do the confessionals. The bathroom cameras are not for confessionals. Trump is saying that did not make it so.

I'm not the DM, Griffin, but thank you so much for respecting my confidence. So what's the deal with... Is he in the bathroom? Yeah, everybody's in the bathroom. Okay, I'm going to use my strength to snap off the interior knob and close the door. Okay. Very chill. With me outside the door.

Oh, okay. I'm trapping him in the bathroom. Okay. This is fine. Yeah, it's fun. Do take a wreck, I guess? I mean, right? Yeah. I mean, you're not fighting. You're not skirmishing with the knob.

No. I'm gonna wreck it. What would you say this is? Risky? Yeah, because it's risky just because if, like, if it doesn't work, he's... I mean, yeah, it's risky, Trap. It's gonna bring some weird attention. That's a four. How do you only have a one in Rec?

I mean, it's still pretty good. I only got two and the other things are good at. Yeah, that's fair. Rec, you have a four here, Trave. That's a mixed success. Correct. With a mixed success, you jam the lock. You reach in, you pull up on it.

It seems to be wedged in there really good. Like, it seems to be stuck. But you have a sense that if he were to, like, work on it a bit, He could escape. Okay. Hey. Hey, the door. Hey,

Johnny, the door locked. Johnny! And with that, Johnny's going to make his way looking for... Looking for... Hey, by the way,

the producers didn't understand that, but they loved it. Yeah. You're a real... You're a real fucking loose cannon. Yeah. I'm going to... I'm going hunting for Kip.

Okay. Dad, you're looking for Scott's parents. Yes. Omar. Sorry. He makes his way to the rent room. And knocks on the door. Hello.

I'm Fred. We're not really part of it. Fred. We're not really part of the show. Can I help you? Oh, I know. I know. I just,

I am a huge. Hold on. I got Jeopardy on. Let me meet it real quick. Oh, sure. Oh, this is a good one. This was where the Blossom lady was hosting. You've seen it already?

I thought it was new. No. No, no, no, no. Is it a rerun? It is. God damn it, Betty, I told you. Turn it off. This guy says it's a rerun.

run. I told you. So what, how can I, was it Omar? How can I help you, Omar? Fred, I just, uh, I am such a huge. I want to thank you, by the way, for coming in and adding another voice to this house. Uh, I was worried that that would be a one-off gag. Uh, seeing our room on the map. And when he told you about us, I thought that was as far as our involvement would go.

But I am so excited to, uh, be, be here chatting with you, Omar. So how can I help? I just, I'm absolutely fascinated by yours and Betty's parenting techniques because you have created the epitome of humanhood. And I just, I want to know more about Scott when he was a child and maybe some something from his past. Antiquotes. I'm kind of a collector of anecdotes. and I was hoping that I could... That's a really weird way to phrase that, but...

Sure. All right, Dad, let's give me a... If we're going to get him to open up to you, why don't you give me a sway roll to see if you can get him to talk. In which I have no dots. Okay. So since I have no dots on a roll two, correct?

Yep, that's right. Roll two and take the worst one. Hey, not bad, Dad. Five and four. Five and a four. Is that the first zero dice roll that hasn't been a fucking colossal disaster? Yes, I believe so. Okay, make success.

Yeah, I, uh, well, what do you want to know? Well, I want to get to know the Scott that the rest of the world doesn't know. I just, I want to know about, what was he like growing up? Do you have any pictures of, uh, him and you and Betty with her tight bod? Jesus. Absolutely wild things. I mean, I don't expect to talk to Betty.

I don't want to hear. She's in the can. Yeah, so he was a, I don't have any photos of us together as a young band, which seems improbable, but it is the case. I can tell you he was a, really, really bad student.

He was left-handed, and he had a teacher that forced him to write with his right hand. Oh, I know. So he, that probably seems like a clue because it's so specific, but it's really just an anecdote. Someone should take some kind of action there. You don't remember that teacher's name to you by any chance. Oh. I just, I would like to report them to the authorities. Yes.

Yes. that was Clara Williams was that teacher. Clara Williams, his third grade teacher. Somebody write that down because that's definitely going to come up again. Or not. Or not.

Sorry, I don't know how he already. That's the big bad of the whole season. Yeah. Yeah. So he struggled as a student, but he was in the Glee Club, beautiful singing voices. I'm sure you've heard.

He's always had an interest. in music. Did he ever have a solo? Super duper allergic to cinnamon. I can't get nervous stuff. But that's all I know. I mean,

that's not all I know. That would be a wild thing to say about my son. Well, I'm surprised. I'm surprised that he wasn't involved in sports. Was he not involved in sports? You know, weirdly, he was just always a little bit of a lethargic kid because

because of his lack of cinnamon so many times at sporting of it cinnamon is on offer and a lot of he's afraid you know so we avoided a lot of that at Swarwood was really to spend a lot of breakfast foods and breakfast gives you the year

yeah so but yeah he he didn't start building his physique until his mid-20s Hey dad you probably wrap this out because it's Sounds like Scott's dad is melting. No, this is just he's tired. It's late. All right.

Fred, that's what, let me ask you, no, no serious boyfriend, girlfriend, fiancee. Oh, he's always been a little bit of a lethario. The lethargic lethario, they call it. The lethargic lethario. But he's a sweet guy, and if you break his heart, I'll kill you. Oh, no, no, I would never, never. Really?

Wow. Um, okay. It's just an expression. Omar, was it? Well, this has been fun. Well, I will leave you alone. No, no pictures of Betty. Nothing like on the wall.

You are starting to sound like a pervert. Starting. It is, it is Passion's Cove. I, no, no, it wasn't an attack. It was a compliment. I must return to my room. Thank you, Fred. And give my best to Betty.

And here, this, this is my number. Just, you know, hang on. Your phone number. That's a huge move. Well, that's kind of a flat fanny. Flatfanny credo is... That's your Christian name. And that's, yes, flat fanny.

Omar flatfant. Wow, this has been a very specific few minutes we've had here together. So I'm going to close the door now. Good night. Wait, wait, wait. One last thing. One last thing. Hachimachi.

The final Jeopardy answer is... derived from potatoes. It might be under potent potables. So thank you, Fred. Good day. You shouldn't give me stuff like that, Dad. You never know what I'm going to do. Turn that on you at the last second when you least expect it.

Okay, that was great. Let's go back to Scott in the jam zone. Yeah, but then, you know, we like to skydive together too. and there was a big accident and the rest of my family slash band did hit the ground and exploded. Sorry, I spaced out a second.

You want to hear something. That's a G chord. Can you try that? You play a G chord? There's no way I have an in-tune guitar right now. It is probably tuned to drop B sharp. Well, I'm not going to keep playing guitar through the whole thing. It's just sort of set the ambiance.

I'm there. Okay, you know what, Griff? Yeah. We're going to jam. Okay. You're going to give me a finesse roll, and we're going to see how this jam session goes. He starts laying out some tasty licks. Yeah, for sure.

Gets a nice rhythm going. All right, just, here. Just sort of hop in with a solo whenever the mood strikes, you know? Yeah, for sure, bro. All right. Let me hear that finestral griff What This feels

Just hop in Okay Anytime you're ready Whoa Not Okay so Griffin has a five Which is a mixed success I think you start laying down

A really nice lick Griffin And the two of you're sort of like Jamming together And he's absolutely Vibing on it I didn't set the terms for that But I think it's pretty risky Because you know

you only get one jam. Right. That's what Dave Matthew says. You felt that, right? You felt that connection. That was real. There's something deep there. I haven't felt this way since I played,

since I played music with my family that exploded. My family that exploded when they hit the ground doing a skydiving. God damn it. Scott, can I steal you? God damn it. Yeah, Shalbethany, no problem. I'm just going to go kind of hang with Shlbethany for a while. Oh, good, bro.

This has been cool. This has been really cool, actually. Yeah, for sure. I want to try to hang my guitar that I was playing up where he got Sympatico from. Ooh, that's really smart, Griff. Thanks. Let's do... You know, I think he's looking at Shlopethany, and he's getting ready to...

Like, he's focused on her for a second. Cool. Give me a risky standard role of finesse. I think I made the thing. I think it's another finesse. You're just being like a smooth, smooth operator. I'm going to push it too.

Okay. Smart. Because I really want this to be a success. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Oh, thank Christ that I pushed it. That is a one, two, three, six. Six. Fuck, yes.

Oh, yeah. Do you, uh, uh, so right. So, was it Good Party? Evan, yeah. Evan.

My friends call me. Evan. I'll just stick with Good Party. If you would, do you mind putting these up for me? Yeah. It'll lock behind it. It's no problem. Sure, no problem.

Scott, if you don't come right now, I'm going to squeeze this dweep's throat until he blocks out. Yeah. No problem. Here we go. All right. And Shlobethany and Scott head out. leaving you alone to do whatever. There's cameras in here, so I can't just fucking pocket the guitar, right?

Collapse it down in whatever way. I mean, it's a TV show you can do whatever you want to do. I can't tell you how that will be out. I'm not ready to pop that off yet. I just want to hang my guitar up where his was and then hang his guitar. I'll tell you what, here's what your six gets you. With a six, not only does he not notice, the producers don't notice what you did. That's what I was hoping would be true.

That is the deal. They didn't make the connection either. Okay, cool. And you got some points with Scott. It worked out good. I'm treating you guys as like a hive mine. I know that doesn't make the most sense, but I can't keep track of three individual relationships. Yeah, sure.

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Subscribe to Let's Learn Everything every other Thursday on Maximum Fun. Can I see Shlbethany and Scott? Yeah, they just made their way out of the jam room, and let's say they're heading over to the really great room. Okay. I'm going to attempt to intercept them. Okay. And,

uh, Hey, uh, it's got, uh, sorry, this is my time. Um,

and I bump into her and when I do, holy shit, are you sure? Yeah. I'm going to attempt to, okay. I'm going to attempt to, uh,

do a little like reverse pig pocketing and put some deli meat that I grabbed off the table into like her purse or her pocket or something. you thank you for this thank you Travis you're welcome is this and just so I'm clear this is a finesse roll correct that you're taking to plant meat on Shlebethany yes I am is it is this the mole is it

is there a secret arrangement between Travis and Justin going on that big meat on Shlebethany buddy there is no there is no back I am as I'm as perplexed as you are um Trav would love to see it. Okay. Risky, right? Yeah.

And I think that it's, and I mean, I think that it's a, uh, uh, I mean, I guess it's standard, right? You're not trying to plan a whole ham, just a little bit of deli meat. Now, I, I am attempting to also create an opportunity myself by running into her, which I think opens me up for shit. But what do you mean? Does that give me a bonus dice? What? What? By like, because I'm running into her to mask the move.

That's not how bonus dice work. No, you don't get a bonus. It's fun to ask, though. Why not? Five and a six, baby. That's a success. That's a, wow. You have two in the ass?

Yes, I do. Wow. Okay. Five and a six. What the fuck, you fucking dingus? I was just trying to get my time. Give me your pancake. I'm going to chop it off.

No. but thank you for asking well consent's important that's very true sorry I'll wait my turn no fine I'll wait my turn and I back away

no you'll wait for this and then Shlbethany dumps her wine on your head drink up bitch fair guzzle it down you nasty little dirt bag go get me another one Go get me another one.

I said okay. Chablay, please. Pretend I didn't say please. Okay. Why are you still here? No, I'm walking away. I'm talking to myself at this point. You sound as loud as you did before.

Why are you so loud? It's a Doppler effect. A Lloyd Dobler effect. I skipped every science class I ever had. How'd you graduate? Softball scholarship. I knew it. To fighting giants and mold monsters and shit.

Like, I only want to do this. I only want this to be the whole show. Beef and Shlebethany are going to end up being friends. I can feel it. Beef, I'm going to stick with you for a second. You were just sent to get some wine for Shlebethany. What do you? And I put meat on her.

You did put meat on her. That was just a few seconds ago, so we all remember that. what are you doing now um is there anybody else over at like the drinks area at the uh yeah kips over there the bar yeah kips over there um i go over and i'm like uh schlbethany am i right actually the worst person i've ever met in my entire life and i've known some real stinkers absolutely she sent me over to get her a glass of line after She dumped it on my head. Ugh, gross.

I pour the glass of wine. You know what, Kip? I tell you what, at this point, she had Shlbethany dumped her drink on my head. My chances are shot. Yeah, you look terrible. You look like an absolute mess. But here's, I hate her so much.

How about I'll go and steal him away to you? You go to the ball pit and I'll have him come to you while I deal with her. Right? Because I'm not going to get that golden note, but you still have a shot, right? So I'll set you up. Why won't you get the golden note? Look at me. I ripped a big fart.

I remember that. I meant to give you shit about that, actually. It's hilarious. I'm soaked in wine. Yeah? And I got embarrassed in front of Scott by Shlebetany. Like, there's no way I'm coming out of this with me. So I'll go to the ball pit and just sort of wait there.

And I'll send Scott over. I do need to get some face time with them. Yeah, I'll handle it. But I don't know if I can. I mean. Well, I'm going to start shit with Shlbethany and kind of go for like a big fight kind of thing. So I'll throw the wine on her, right? We'll get into it.

Yeah. I don't know. Okay. Let me get a sway roll, Trow. And the stakes are pretty minor here. It's just worst case scenario. Kipp's like, no. If it goes bad enough, Kit might rat you out.

But, yeah. I'm going to push myself because I have zero and swing. The two. It's a two. No. No, I don't think so. In fact, I think I'm going to tell Shalbethy about your little plan. Well, good luck.

And then I dumped a wine on Kip's head. Whoa. Okay. And then Kip has a bigger glass of wine, and they dump it on your head. Again, you're double soap with wine. Is it at least the same kind of wine? Yeah. It was a white wine and you had a red wine dumped on you before so now you have a rosé on top of you because that's all that rosé is in case you guys didn't know.

It's just red and white mixed together. You are the expert on that subject. Thanks. The producers, Travis? Yeah. They're loving it. I'm so glad. Which doesn't seem like the way it should work with bad roles, but they're loving it.

It's also, it doesn't seem like how it should work because so far the only dream. that has existed on this show so far is people dumping wine on other people. No, I locked other Ricky in a bathroom. Oh, okay, that's fair. I put some meat on Shle Bethany, and there's been wine dumpage. All centered around yours truly. Can I try to circle up with Emmerich while this is all happening? Yeah, absolutely.

I mean, I don't think you need to work that hard at all for that to happen. Um, hmm. Hey, I, uh, yeah, I got a piss. Go piss with me. Are you speaking to me? Yes. I'm not comfortable with that. All right, here we go. Very well.

And I walk to the bathroom. A different bathroom. No, still open? No, he said I'm walking to the bathroom. There's numerous bathrooms. Okay. Not that bathroom Oh no no no no no my friend

You're going to the bathroom So I'm looking at my map here Okay Griffin Do you guys want to go to a bathroom Or the bathroom that you know that other Ricky is locked in I want to go to the other bathroom that we know Ricky is in Okay

As you approach you start hearing Well I want to talk to Emmerk before we You're just hearing out from like from nearby You can go ahead and start talking. Hey, somebody. Come on. We need to at some point disable the cameras so that we can make a clean getaway. I think it may behoove you to do a little snooping around the trailer so that when that time comes we have some sort of means of disruption.

I will do that. Okay. And I thought we could give ourselves an opportunity to do so. No, that's... I had one thing I want to do first, and then I shall, I shall dispatch myself to do that. I think that's a new. Wonderful. I'll go snidea.

Um, this, should we do something about this poor fellow? Yes, that's what I, hey, bro, is everything okay in there? No, it's not okay in here. Actually, I got locked in here accidentally. God, I hate that for you, bro. It might have been on purpose. I don't know. But thank, can you like, if you just like, don't know.

A donkey kick the door. I feel like you could get it. No way. And bro, no, bro, you probably have limited oxygen. No, this is the other bro. This is the flat face. Who is it? I don't know your voices.

We're basically strangers. This is Omar. The flat fan. Evan. I had a really good vibe about you too. Cool, cool, cool, cool. Can you give you all? So listen, conserve your oxygen.

You probably have limited air in there. I'd quit yelling. That's great. And pounding on the door if I were you. Now I'm freaked. No, I'm freaked. Okay, it's all right. I'm getting freaked.

Breathe. All right. Okay. Slowly. But the more I breathe, the less oxygen I have. I know. It's confusing. Just kick the door!

That's the oxygen deprivation. Okay, all right. I'm going to try to chill. Four breaths in. Hold it for four. Release it in eight. Box breathing. I love that.

Thank you. Thank you. Okay. That's better. Let me do my one thing and then I will go inspect the trailer. We can split the. these tasks up. I didn't, I wasn't trying to give you orders. I wanted, I can poke around the trailer and see what I see in there. Oh, well, I mean, I, I just had one little thing I wanted to do, but then I think, I think, I'm going to the trailer's a great idea.

So anybody, you're gonna, so, can you just tell somebody I'm in here? Yeah, I'll go get a teacher. I mean, mommy. I mean, production. Yeah. Yes. And you remember, for a foreign, hold for, resonate. Emrick, what are you doing? Emrick is going to approach Scott. Okay. Before he does that, he's going to create a hard light form of a shoebox greeting card. So you're using hard light to make a card. Yes. Okay. Where is the prism? Well, I mean, well, he can use the give a ghost projector to create hard light forms.

But they have to have a prism that's projecting them. Like, right? When we've done it before, it just came from the give a ghost projector. The other things he's created in the past. Okay, here's what we're going to do, Dad. Take one load, add one load for the prism. and we'll say that you can tell me where the

it doesn't have to be flat, right? It's a greeting card and the prism is small so tell me how it's hidden in the card. I would say it's a very small prism and it's, I will say it's on the cover of the shoebox greeting card. You know, like when you buy a birthday card

for somebody that's got a little jewel or a little ornament on it or something. Yeah, what does it look like? What does it look like? The outside of it says on your birthday at the Cove of Passion. And then when you open it, it says, soon with Scott, you'll get a mashing.

Okay, great. You know, when they were coming out with this line of cars at Chewbox, they thought, is this a niche? Are we going to sell any of these? And like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, people are going to love this. Okay, you have this card and you hand it to Scott, who is...

What is Scott doing? He's talking to Shlopethany. Okay. Excuse me. Scott. Scott, this janitor wants you to throw his trash for him. How rude. No, I actually need to speak to both of you.

It is... I need Shabli. How did you hire these? people, they're the worst. I saw you had a bit of a connection with Mr. Good Party over there, and it's his birthday.

And I was wondering if you would both sign this card for me to give to Evan on behalf of all of us. I would rather push my dad into an open well. Well, then

you should go find yourself some Chablis and let Scott go go ahead and sign the card. Normally, I would never do it. Any other human being ever asked me to do ever, but I am very thirsty. Yes. I will do this.

All right, and she'll let any leaves to give you some wine. Scott, sign it with your left hand. Scott looks at you. Go it. I know. I know. But I, I'm a righty, man. I've always been riding.

No, no, no, you haven't always been a righty. You used to be a lefty. And then Clara Williams. Clara Williams came into your life and made you be something you didn't want to be. I want you to be you. Scott, how did you know? Scott, you are my obsession. I can literally say and completely honestly say that you, Scott Bolflex, are my obsession.

I am totally devoted to you. I want to know everything about you. You know, a lot of people would be scared by this energy that you're bringing right now. A lot of people. I would say most,

almost everybody that I've never known or heard about or met or any of it would be absolutely wigged. Because I'm asking you. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. Give me one roll to figure it out. One rolls worth of time.

He gave me one roll of time to think about it. God Almighty. Can I help him? Because this is a good play. Can we flashback? And I tried to talk to him about swaying just so he can get an extra dice on this role, please? So your assistance is he...

Flashback. Flashback. In the flashback. Okay. Emric, listen. We are going to be asked to be serial daters while we are in there. And you possess an energy.

I have never seen the program. Okay, it's very horny. It's hugely horny. Imagine a reality show where every decision that the production could make is the horniest possible decision. As in love? As in romance.

They do, there is a place for that in usually the final three or four we get out to the partner material. But there's going to be a lot of shaggy play around that in the intro episodes. I feel like that myself and beef can stir up some of the drama. But you have a strangeness about you that I think will be extremely intelligent. So I think if you try your best, you may be able to flirt your way into Scott's heart. Give me an example.

Just a very quick. Give me something I can say that would. Well, you learn something about him, something, oh, secret, something even he doesn't know. And then you show that you care about that thing. You definitely don't talk about yourself the whole time. And then don't take it too far, though. I would say, like, don't say like, something like I'm, like, obsessed with you. You're my obsession.

Yeah, just to lean in here real quick, just go over it. That would be so weird if you said, like, you're my obsession. And then repeated it multiple times. I just have this conversation. On the boat ride. The boat ride to the cove. Very well. All right.

The boat ride? I don't know. However we got to the cove. Yeah, I guess it would probably be a boat ride. Yeah, it's a boat. All right. Very, very well. But I am truly this hard light creation of Scott BoFlex is the most exciting thing.

I could learn so much from it. Yeah. Just keep that close, right? Yeah, don't overdo it, but you have, use your fascination with the, with the form, to serve as fascination for the individual. And I think you will do just fine. Thank you both. Thank you so much. Hey, my name's Mean Doug.

Can I favor you all with some music for the boat ride? How are you on the boat? How are you on the boat right now, Mead? Mean, Doug, you shouldn't be here. Oh, that sense. Oh, that's sense. It's the sea air. It dries out the reed.

Okay, you got a bonus die. It's a long walk to it, but you found it. Sounds like I should get two bonus die because, I mean, beef did jump in there. You can only be assisted by one. So you got, you take a, uh,

so is this consort? Oh, that's interesting. Is this consort? Yeah. I, well, consulate with connections from your heritage background,

friends, or rivals, Did that gain access to resources information? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you have points in consort? Yeah, is that better for you? Mm-hmm. Oh, okay.

Still risky, though, right? Yeah. Yep. You did say obsession. Is it standard? Or great. It's standard, but it is risky. And I will tell you the consequences of this will not go, it will be,

this is a pretty big swing you're taking here. So the consequences will be rough if it doesn't work. Okay. And I'm going to push myself as well. Right? I can still do that even with an assist. Sure, yeah. Don't forget your stress.

I just marked it. I believe in you. I don't. Okay. Here we go. Oh, my God. One, two, three. Oh, my God.

Live, Jesus. Jesus. Jesus. Oh my God. So much stress was taken. for this one, this one act of enticement. What? Can I redo it? I mean, is there, can you redo it?

Can you redo it? Is there a, yeah. Like a redo? No, no, no. You know. No, I mean, like a do-over. You know, everybody gets a one do-over per episode. I've just decided.

Okay. No, no, no, I think that's against the spirit of the game. Let's let's, Yeah, of course it is. Yeah, dad. I was being facet. Here's what happens, dad. Scott grabs you by the lapels and lifts you up against the wall.

Eh, sort of. And he says, all right. You are dealing with some powerful stuff from my background. You tell me right now. How did you learn about Miss Williams and my left hand? And I will know if you're lying to me. And if I'm not satisfied by your answer, you are fucking out of this house. So now you're in a desperate situation.

Okay. That is harder than the last one. But I'm just guessing, Justin, the producers are loving it. Yeah, they're loving it. You're absolutely right. Okay. Do I have to roll? I mean, do I have to do another?

Oh, yeah, yeah. You're going to do, this is, this one's sway. This one is, right? I mean, we're all feeling like, and it is a, desperate sway because wow, you really do not get another chance at this. You're in a pretty bad

spot. Well, wait, unless, unless he tells the truth, right? What? If he tells the truth, then that's not deception or I guess it's influenced. I mean, he is trying to sway

him with his answer that it is not, I mean, the swaying is how is he, how well is he going to be able to diffuse the situation? That is the sway. It doesn't really, the content, you know, doesn't matter so much as the. Does that make sense? Yeah, for sure.

Okay. Is it great effect? Or still standard. Give me one second. I'm going to offer you, Dad, because of the situation, I'm going to offer you a devil's bargain. Ooh. The bargain is this. You can.

I will give you an extra dye in this, but because of how much you are shaking things up and the actions you are taking, you're going to take heat because of the people that are watching this. Some of whom may be employees of Denton. You have no idea ever. Or sometimes you know, but not in this situation.

So you will take two heat if you take this extra dye. And that's heat on the entire team, right? Indeed, it is. I don't know if I want to. Is that okay with you guys? Hey, man, don't ask me. This is your choice. I also don't like you.

I don't think you guys can. I'm not going to let you guys. No table talk. Yeah. I don't want to medigame it. Yeah, I don't want to medigame it because it's something that's happening in the moment. All right. I tell you what.

If I'm taking two heat, then I would like two bonus die. And my reasoning is this, I think I have a way for Emmerich to be totally honest and still sway him. I mean, I can only give you one bonus die. Okay. It's the best I can do. But that's the bargain. Take the two heat and get the bonus die. It's, but it's completely up to you.

I'll take it. Okay. traveling mark that and that's desperate great limited extreme what uh it's a great great great effort desperate great and you're giving me one bonus die indeed i am and i'm going to push myself again jesus christ are you should okay well be stressed out boy yeah i'm sure okay i really want this to work okay should i say should i say the line and then do the role or do the role first Say the line then do the role. Okay.

Scott, ever since I learned about you, I have been totally consumed with learning everything about you. You are a dream to me, a goal, an ideal. And for that reason, I went and spoke to Betty and Fred. out of my desire to know more about you. And there was nothing evil in my intentions. I just wanted to know what made Scott Boldflex,

Scott Boldflex. And that was my reason for doing it, because I want to know everything about you, Scott. And we got to. Oh my God. Yes! Take experience and sway. Take experience and sway.

Take experience and sway. Or resolve, right? Oh, yeah, and resolve. Emmerich, he's still holding you up against a wall. And then you hear a knock at the glass. And you see Scott looks out the window. And you see Greg giving two thumbs up. And Scott starts holding you.

with one hand. And he's... God he's strong. That's the nicest thing that anyone has ever said to me. And then he reaches into his pocket. It says,

will you harmonize with me? That's where we'll stop. Maximumfund.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Audience. Audience supported.