The Always Sunny Podcast - Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life

Episode Date: October 10, 2022

Just naked as the day I was born out there, real risky.

Why am I the only one who can't figure out how to use the Bluetooth earphones? You see the Bluetooth up in the right hand corner? No, I don't have a Bluetooth in my right hand corner. Oh. As it searches for devices, it doesn't seem to find these little suckers. Press the button and hold the button. And don't take them out. Yeah, is there like a little button on there?

On the back. Button. Ain't no motherfucker. See that little button? Nah, nah, gee. Nah, dog, I ain't got no button. Oh shit, I've never noticed that button. Holy shit, I've never noticed that.

Sorry, my dog's decided she has to be a part of this, so she's going to be... That's fine. That noise you hear is her not me barking and barking. I can't get my mic to work. Is it turning on? I can't hear any of yous. You can't hear us? Hold on.

You can hear everybody can hear, but I'm the only one that can't hear now. I'm calling you. Here's Megan calling me. Hey, Meg. This is funny. So just check your sound preferences, because I bet you have your output going through your microphone, which is why you can't hear us. So if you go to system preferences...

Ah, fuck. Wow. Are you guys hearing like crazy shit? What the fuck? I'm hearing it again, by the way. Yeah, I'm too. Sorry guys, it's probably me. Oh shit, I forgot something.

I'll be right back. Great. Okay. Well, after all that fun, let's get started. Well, here we are on the Always Sunny podcast. Now, if you'll notice, we're not in studio. We're here in our homes doing this Zoom bullshit again. And I'd like to bring up why, and I have a couple of questions.

It appears that my co-hosts, Glenn and Charlie, were both sick. Charlie's been sick for a while. Glenn is now sick with some sort of flu type cold and or COVID. We don't know. But we have established that both of them are more healthier than I am. And yet here I am, healthy as can be. Yeah, so I go ahead. I have more beef than you do with this exact issue, Rob, and here's why.

Because Charlie, can I say what you just went through? Please. Okay. So Charlie, who somehow was the healthiest of all of us, according to Dr. Kipper. And you know, I've got beef with that too, but we can get to that later. You know, got hit with COVID pretty hard and I, who was not as healthy as Charlie, currently have COVID and I feel nothing. Well, I mean, if you want to go tip for tat, this is your second bat with COVID.

It was my first. I think I went a good two and a half years without even a sniffle. And it's the first time I was sick and quite some time. Secondly, I think I was pretty worn down from that tour that we did when I got it. So you know, it's like already pretty run down and then it crept into me. Now we all did the tour. We all did the tour. Yeah, but you guys had already had COVID.

So you had COVID immunity. I did not. So I was just like naked as the day I was born out there, you know, real risky. And you know, it takes a lot to sing, you know, to really just get out there and sing every night. You really kind of push in the lungs and, uh, and, um, and let's admit it. We pushed the liver and it got me. Did we just prove then Rob's theory that whiskey kills COVID if you like drink enough

of it while you're traveling? Well I didn't have any at my cousin's wedding, which is I'm pretty sure is where I got it. So maybe if I had been drinking whiskey, I would have been fine. I don't know. It's not amazing. We were around thousands of people. I mean, just thousands of people in Philadelphia and Kentucky. Yeah.

Hugging and shaking hands and just getting breathed on left and right. It was so foolish. That's just, that's just, yeah, just, we should not have done that. We should not have done that. And yet that's not where Charlie apparently got it. I don't believe so. I think it was like my, like, uh, my aunt's friends being like, oh, it's good to see you Charlie.

I'm just screaming right into my mouth and like, excuse me Charlie, I've been sick for a long time. But you know, yeah, it's always good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let me get, let me get. If you don't think that Philly accent sounds like fucking rick, some kind of ridiculous

Victorian England accent. What is Charlie, get like, get out of my face. Like I hate it when people talk right into my face. Have you ever? Well, I'll say it's, it's louder than a wedding though, right? It is. Well, yeah. Like so they're, they're blasting the music.

So then, you know, some, someone who like doesn't know me very well, wants to say hi, really has to get up in there to, to talk to me. And I think that's where the COVID particles were passed back and forth. Yeah. I did an experiment the other day. This was, this was fun. I was at some event and this person was a close talker, right? And just kept, you know, just kept getting like in my face to talk and it just, and it

wasn't that loud. So it was not at all necessary for this person to do this. So I just kept backing up, right? And what I decided to do, because I was like, this is so funny to me. I'm just going to go in a circle and see what happens. And this motherfucker followed me in a circle. We went in, we just got kept, and I was just like, I'm going to see how long this will go on for before this motherfucker notices that we're literally going in circles.

And we just went in circles and circles and circles and this person never, ever noticed that I was taking him on a ride and it was completely bizarre. And I just, luckily it kept me from going crazy because I was like, get out of my face. Dude, I had so weird that you, that you, that you just brought that up because I had almost the same experience on Saturday night. I was at an event and I had the same thought where I was like, I'm going to, there's a very close talker. It was kind of loud, but not loud enough to justify how close he was.

And I know him, like it wasn't a complete stranger, but I, but I thought, okay, how am I going to navigate this? I got it. I'm going to take him on a ride. It was a complete opposite where I went closer to him and I could get him closer and closer and closer and closer. And eventually he started like backing up to the point where I got all the way up like up to him and he was like, what are you doing?

I was like, I was just trying to get as close to you as possible and he's like, why? And anyway, we worked it out. That's funnier. That's even funnier. That's funny. That I feel like that's the personality difference maybe between you and I right there, like in a nutshell. You know, like that's your move.

My move is to, is to like keep backing up and just going in circles and your move is just just, all right. Well, if we're going forward, let's go forward and like just go all the way forward because buddy, I'm ready to touch noses. If you want. Yeah. I'll fucking kiss you. I'll nibble on that top lip.

Just, just, just see what happens. That's right. I just stand there and take it. I just take it, man. Like I take every person who wants to talk right into my mouth. I take it. I let them talk as long as they want. I didn't wear a mask at the wedding because I was like, ah, I don't want to be like the

only like celebrity guy there and then he's got a mask on and people are like, oh, Charlie thinks he's better than us. He's going to cover his face. You know, like, I don't know. Just like weird. Like I want everyone to be happy at my own expense. Now I want no one to be happy because I was sick for too long. So that is, that's really funny.

I like it. That's how you get cultured. I want everyone to be happy. I had a good time at the wedding. What are you going to do? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? Okay.

You want to talk about this erotic life, man. This Dennis Reynolds erotic life. Yeah. God. I mean, every time we watch an episode, it just blows me away at how weird this show is. It's really funny. It's so weird.

It's so weird. It's so weird. Do you guys want me to recap what happens for people? Yeah. Sure. Doing a little bit of structure back. Do you guys remember the structure? Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, Donna. There's a structure now. All right. So yeah, we have a little bit of structure. Dennis Reynolds, an erotic life is from season four, episode nine. It aired on October 23rd, 2008. It was written by Rob McElhaney, Glenn Howerton, and Scott Marder.

It was directed by Fred Savage. Dennis enters rehab while Mac and Frank try to authenticate his erotic memoir, Dee and Charlie live in each other's shoes for the day. What were you even doing in that crawl space, Charlie? Well, for starters, I was mining my own business. I was also trying to do a little light reading, and then I was putting some cheese in the rat traps. You were putting the cheese in the rat traps?

Yes. Can I smell your mouth? Why? You were eating the cheese, weren't you, out of the rat traps? No. I was putting the cheese, to test it, to see why the rats weren't eating it, and then... Why are you always doing such weird things, Charlie? I do weird things?

Name another thing that you think is weird. Well, I caught you stealing a bunch of coins out of the fountain at Logan Circle. Uh, I was acquiring a little bit of cash to pay my spy, Dee. Why do you have a spy? To spy on the waitress. Of course I have a spy. Is that normal? Do you know what?

Shut up and give me my book back, please. No! Say, guys, what book you keep going on and on about? It's nothing. You don't need to... Oh, my God. Whoa. These are my...

These are my memoirs. Charlie, you found my book. These are my memoirs. Hey, guys. Charlie found my memoirs. Your memoirs? I've been keeping track of all my sexual exploits, and I was going to unleash them on the world at a fiery blaze of eroticism.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down a second, Dennis. You wrote a book? Well, it's more of a tale of redemption told through my erotic travels. Giddy up, man. That's amazing. That's good stuff, right? Yeah.

But then, one day, the book just sort of went mysteriously missing. Charlie, what the hell were you doing with it? Well, uh, since he can't read, I'm guessing he was masturbating to your pictures. Goddamn jacket off to my... No, no. That's not at all. You know what? What are you doing to me?

Why are you doing this? You've been riding me? Now you're accusing me of things? You just don't get it. You don't know why I do the things that I do? It's nuts. You don't know how hard I got it, dude. You got it pretty tough.

Your life is pretty hard. I tell you what. I just like to walk a mile in my shoes, huh? Trying your old buddy, Charlie, on for size. You want me to walk a mile in your shoes because I can't handle your big, tough life? I will. That sounds fine to me. I will do that.

Oh, my God. Shut up. Dennis, what's the name of this book? Ah. I'll tell you what, in my COVID haze, I watched a lot of movies, which, you know, the one good thing about it is like just having some time to just be like, well, I can't do shit. So let me watch some stuff. And I watched some, like, some, I won't like to say every movie, but I watched some what

are considered really high end, sophisticated, you know, like movies from Europe that are very funny and they were brilliant. They blew me away. But out of watching all those movies and as much as I love them, nothing made me laugh harder than Danny running into the room to eat that cat food at the end of the night when those cats started howling. Charlie, no wonder if wreaks in here, you have open cans of pee everywhere. Well, I'm sorry, but you do not want to use that bathroom.

Okay. Now, eat one of these. All right. You're going to want to huff a little glue and drink some beer. This is cat food, Charlie. Well, I can't explain it. All right. There's some sort of weird chemical reaction that happens when you combine cat food, beer

and glue. It makes you feel like extremely sick and tired and you're able to fall asleep. Why would I want to make myself extremely sick and tired? Because there's going to be about 50 cats howling outside that window all night long and you have no idea how that 50 cats can be. Okay. Maybe there wouldn't be cats surrounding your building if you didn't have open cans of cat food everywhere.

I have 50 cats howling outside my window because I have 10,000 rats running around my building. Okay. Stop yelling. I'm not an idiot. There's a reason to do the things that I... Oh, I don't feel good. I'm just starting right on time. If I were you, I'd start wolfing that shit down.

I got to go sleep. Oh, I'm not feeling good at all. I was like, you know, there's a certain type of humor that our show found and that we were able to get away with that for me, I'm sure not for everyone, for me, is a true belly laugh, you know, is a true belly laugh. And I would argue that this episode does not work for many reasons, but even an episode that doesn't work to have a laugh that, because I'd forgotten, I'd forgotten he came firing in and started wolfing down the cat food so he could go to sleep.

And what's just a funny thing that was, I don't know, did that make any sense? I think I have COVID brain still. I cried laugh, didn't make sense. I cried laughed like five different separate times in this one was when you picked up the pee bucket to show D where she could go pee and it splashed and you start laughing. And I was laughing at that. Then I also laughed when Danny came firing in with the inexplicably wearing Mardi Gras beads.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's been some crazy party. Yeah, I remember us making that choice and being like, let's just store some Mardi Gras beads on him and have it be a total mystery. We won't explain it at all, but it's just like he's been at some kind of fucking weird thing. And then, but it's also like the specificity of how he wolves it down, then he gets in bed, puts his back to you and then he turns over for a second and he's like, almost like he's considering turning the other way.

And then he's like, and turns back to the direction that he was going in. The specificity of some of those choices was incredible. And then I also guffawed at all the shining stuff, but especially when D comes back in and and Danny's like, Occupado, Occupado. Well, this is, I mean, it's the first, yeah, it's the first time we really kind of peeled back the curtain to show you what was going on, you know, in these guys. And I mean, we, we, we'd alluded to, you know, what their life was like and pooped the bed and, you know, so, but we were getting deeper and deeper into their like strange, uh, bromance.

If you guys remember this season, we had, um, a couple issues. It was this episode and it was Mac and Charlie Die. And Mac and Charlie Die and this episode were coming in crazy long on time. And for anyone at home who doesn't know what that means, you have a certain amount of time. The episode has got to be, what was it at that time, 22 minutes, 23 minutes? Yeah, 22, 40 or so. Probably 21 and a half. It was getting, it's getting shorter and shorter as the years go by.

Right. So at that time we had about 21 and a half minutes, whatever it was. And you know, the episode was like 30 minutes. And nowadays there's more wiggle room and television. But back then it was pretty much like, no, you have to hit, you pretty much have to hit this time window because we have all these ads that are paying for the, uh, eyeballs. So, um, so we were, we had enough time to fix Mac and Charlie Die because of when we shot it in the season that we said, okay, we can add a bunch of scenes and make it a

two-parter. And I think we pitched to FX doing that for this episode too. And they were like, no, uh, I think, uh, they didn't like, they, they didn't like two-parters. They never wanted two-parters that they, they, you know, they always wanted the show to play like you could watch any episode at any time and it wasn't tied to anything else. So this is the first time we sort of coined amongst ourselves a Frankenstein episode, the term of Frankenstein episode, because we had to pull out so much of this episode

to get it to the runtime. And we, we pulled out just enough that it made sense, but I think there was a lot more of me and Dee, uh, of, of what we were up to. I think there was more, there's, there was definitely more of Sinbad and Rob Thomas. Do you guys remember the thing we cut the Sinbad and Rob Thomas? I was expecting it. I thought, I thought it was in the episode. We're, we're, did that, that, that never exist.

Did we really? No, we put it on the DVD. We put it on the DVD. Okay. Did we? So Megan, there was a beat where Rob Thomas breaks Glenn out of, uh, the psychiatric ward and he says, look, you got to get out of here. Sinbad's crazy.

You know, and then he thanks Rob Thomas and he climbs out the window or something like that. And then Rob Thomas like pulls a gun up and we pan off of Rob Thomas to the picture of Sinbad and then blood splatters across Sinbad's face. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, wait, wait, listen, listen, you're going to be out of here. Sinbad read your book and he loved it. Oh yeah. Of course he loved the book.

It's a great book. You don't get it. He's going to kill you and then he's going to write his own stories using your erotic legacy. That's son of a bitch. You'll never get away with it. Sinbad gets what Sinbad wants. Now come on.

Let's go out the window. Out the window. Wait, wait, Rob Thomas. What about you? I mean, what, what are you going to do when Sinbad finds out you helped me? Don't worry about me, man. I'll be just fine. Let's go.

Okay. I've seen this. So yeah, we might have put it in like. We did. We put it in the DVD. It was on the DVD extra. I had the DVDs for the first like five seasons, so I bet I've seen it on that. I also, there is a Dennis Reynolds like short film where he reads from his erotic

memoirs. Yeah. On the DVD. On the behind scene stuff. We started shooting. Yeah. I forgot about that. I can send that to you guys.

How upsetting was that? It's, it's less funny than the episode. Welcome to another installment of Dennis Reynolds, an erotic life. Let us turn erotically to another installment of Dennis Reynolds, an erotic life. Chapter one, memoirs with a gay show. The least funny stuff in the episode, in my opinion, is, is all of the erotic memoirs stuff and the funniest stuff is. I disagree.

Is just, I mean, I don't know. Oh no. The memoirs are funny. It's so funny. The Sinbad stuff is probably less funny to us because we know it's coming. I think if you, like when you don't know it's coming and you're like, what the fuck is Sinbad and Rob Thomas, what are they doing in the show? I think it's funny.

No, I like the Sinbad stuff. I like the Sinbad stuff. I'm not more of a Sinbad. Sinbad's great, by the way. Sinbad's amazing. Yo, come. Yo, come. Ow.

Wake up. What the hell? Yeah, you in hell all right. What? You know what? My name is Sinbad, this Sinbad's house. When you in Sinbad's house, you my bitch. Yeah, you know what that is?

Huh? That's Rob Thomas. MassBox 20. Sing a song. Shut up. I also like the little detail, by the way, that I noticed on this viewing, that when you put your hands up, Glenn, you have very clearly two different stigmata wounds suggesting that Charles, that Mac and Frank couldn't agree.

And so did one of each. Yeah, we did both. Yeah, we did both. Yeah, one of each. Yeah. Yeah, that's funny. Nice little Easter egg for people watching. By the way, we tried to get Bovine Joni for this one.

And we tried to use, we tried to get Bovine Joni himself to do this with us. I think through Danny, because, you know, we've used Danny a couple of times for that, you know, where had Danny reaches like, look, you know, Bon Jovi's a Jersey guy. And he was, or no, that was the, that was the, that comes later, that was the Bruce Springsteen thing. Bruce Springsteen was going to do it. He was going to do it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. But I don't think, I don't know that Bovine Joni ever even got back to us about it. So Mr. Reynolds, you're interested in buying our arena football team. Big time. But I want to do business with Mr. Bon Joni himself. Bon Jovi. Yeah.

Mr. Bovine Joni himself. Ma'am, I am dying of very terminal cancer and I would like to request a private bedside concert from Mr. Bon Jovi. Now, Sambora's presence is not necessary, but it would be nice if he was involved. Question, is this a laser pointer? Yes. Can I have it? No.

Don't. I'm going to take this one. Please don't listen to anything he says. No, no. I'll give you $60 million for the team. Frank, thank you. Frank, thank you. Frank, thank you.

Frank, thank you. I got it. We're talking about cancer. Nobody cares about me or football anymore. We're negotiating. You're not negotiating shit. We're onto the cancer thing now and that is the way that it's going to go from here. Okay.

I'm just going to throw this out there. I don't think you have cancer. What? What are you talking about? That's chemo. That's chemotherapy right there. And for the record, when you go through chemo, your beard hair falls out too. Are you sure?

I told you. I asked a lot of people. I asked my bald cap guy. Not to do the cancer thing. But it was working until you got in with the bullshit numbers. God damn it. You know, I'm not even really bald. I have a full head of hair, not like him.

There's a lot of just screaming at each other in this episode. There's not a lot of levels, you know. But D and I are just hollering at each other the whole time to stand up comedy sequence. That was also really funny. So I don't go to a therapist. I just go to bars. If you walk up to the nearest drunk guy and bump up from behind, he always turns around and goes, hey man, what's your problem?

I was the best. This guy is great. Do you come here every night? Every night, huh? This is great. Do they have food too? Because I could go for some food. No, no, no.

No food. I don't eat while I'm here. Oh, when do you eat? I don't. Why don't you eat dinner? When you warm your nerves and make you dry-heave. And you better hope that you don't have any food in your stomach. You're going to perform?

All right. Now, this next lady you all know because she's here almost every night. Let's hope she's got some new jokes this time. Everybody put your hands together for Deandra Reynolds. Howdy, howdy, howdy. How's everybody doing tonight? So you guys, what's the deal with those hands-free headsets that everybody's wearing in their ears, right?

It's like, hey, everybody look at me. I'm one part robot and three parts asshole. Jesus Christ. I mean, if I read it, it's great. I laughed so hard at all the dry-heaving stuff. I completely forgot how funny that was. And I didn't think anything was going to top Dee's thing, but then your dry-heave at the very end just destroyed me.

Every cheese, cheese is a funny thing. Cheese is a strange thing. I always wonder, like, what is cheese? Where does it go? That's all put in post, right? I mean, that was, didn't he make that sound? We like doubled it up and like, yeah, did the whole thing. Yeah, we added something to it.

We also added the first thing that when Dee's on her first thing, we added that like the burp noise. Caitlin's such a good dry-heaver. What is that? And then Pat Walsh is great as a, so, you know, did Pat write this episode or no? He was just on our writing staff at the time. Yeah, he was on the staff. Yeah.

Yeah. He was on the staff one night. And so he plays the emcee. I just ran into Roberto Rad. Who I just ran into for the first time since then. So that was at 13 years ago. That was two weeks ago. He came up.

That guy. The first stand up. Yeah. Two weeks ago, this guy, I was at someone's house and this man comes over to me and says, I was in an episode of Sunny. And it was that man. But he also went to high school with Charlie. He did.

What a name. Roberto Rad. Man. So who screamed Jesus Christ from offscreen when that was Tim Roach? Was it? Yeah. I think that was our editor. Yeah.

Every now and then those are like editing add-ins, right? Where we're in the editing room. We're like, Jesus Christ. We are supported by Athletic Greens. Yeah. That's right. So I take AG1 every single day primarily because it's lifestyle friendly. No matter what diet I'm on and at a given moment because I want an optimized immune system.

Okay. Especially for this time of year. Well, right. Because Halloween is right around the corner. Yes. That's true. But I'm talking about flu season being right around the corner. I don't need my immune system.

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Okay. Well, let me look at my calendar because that sounds pretty good. To make it easy, Athletic Greens is going to give you a free one year supply of immune supporting vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com slash sunny. Again, that's athleticgreens.com slash sunny to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. And now word from our sponsor, BetterHelp.

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And switch therapists anytime you can. When you want to be a better problem solver, therapy can get you there. It's betterhelp.com slash sunny today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp.com slash sunny. One thing that was so funny to write and perform was Danny and I in the movie theater just trying to be the most obnoxious people that could ever possibly be in a movie theater and to do everything that everybody has at one point experience in a movie theater, but like put them all into one or two people was really fun.

Hey, dude, where you been? I mean, rehab, dude. Oh, yeah. Hey, that whole Joby thing went south. So I think we're just going to scrap the whole book or deal. What are you talking about? I got another call, buddy. Hello?

Will, what's happening? Who you looking for? Oh, this is Mack. You got the wrong number. Oh, my God. Yeah. No, it's no problem. What number were you trying to call?

Hello? Frank, you've got to get me out of here, man. Where are you? I mean, rehab. God damn it. I'm in a movie and this broad's about to get naked, so I got to go. And the person who was calling, Terry, do you remember who that is? Do you see the ball cap guy?

Who was actually playing? Well, it's a random call. That was like part of the joke. Oh, that's right. It's a random call. He calls looking for Bill and then I must take him for Bill. And then it turns out he's Terry. And then we make arrangements to chat after the movie, which is a random guy.

And by the way, you and Danny have a chemistry in that scene, which is, I feel like we haven't played that energy a lot. And it's really funny. Yeah. You're very combative with him in a fun way. Yeah. Do you remember what actor was playing Terry on the other end? No clue.

No clue. I'm almost 100% sure that that is Glenn. I think that that is Glenn with a modulated voice. I'm almost positive. Yeah. I can tell by the delivery. Yeah. I thought it was some chick.

Who are you talking to? I'm talking to Bill. And anyway, so Bill, oh, I'm sorry. No, it's Terry. Sorry about that, Terry. Anyway, these cat people. Terry. Because I kept calling them.

Will you please shut up? Yeah, I got some dick in a movie theater. Give me a shit. Turn around like that. Yeah. Nice talking to you. All right. I'll talk to you afterwards.

Bye. Right. Yeah. Yeah. It's not, it's not that dissimilar to the guy that I played when the guy was trying to check his voicemails in the Sweet D has a heart attack episode and he calls in and you answer the phone in his office. That was, that was also just a voice modulated version of me.

You guys can, yeah, Glenn, you can change your voice in a way that someone won't recognize it. I feel like. Maybe. I don't know. I think I can, but then I do it and then I'm like, oh, it sounds exactly like me still somehow. Well, you guys didn't even realize that that was Glenn in the episode and you just watched

it. Yeah. You don't really hear the other voice to that. Well, it's like turned down. But you're, yeah, right. You're right. You can hear, you can hear. Well, let's, we'll put it in the pod and people can see if they can determine.

They can determine for themselves. But, but what you were saying about the obnoxiousness of those people and the, like, that was so I feel like that's a question we're constantly answering on. It's always sunny. And the answer to the question is always, who does that? You know what I mean? Like when you go through life and you see people like act a certain way, you're like, who the fuck?

Who acts this way? Who does this? And it's always sunny in Philadelphia is the answer to that question. You know what I mean? It's, it's, it's been, it's been such a delight to, uh, urge that, uh, from myself because I've been in movie theaters where people are basically doing exactly what you guys are doing. And I'm like, are you fucking kidding me?

Did I tell the story in the podcast about going to see the thin red line and the guys on the phone the whole time, just talking about what's on the screen and he's blowing on his popcorn? No. It's the weirdest thing. So like I'm in New York City. I'm in Union Square. I'm seeing the thin red line in the theater.

It's pretty packed theater. And, uh, and this guy's on the phone and he's just like describing what's on the movie to his buddy. Like he's like kind of talking. He's sitting right behind me. I'm going crazy. I'm getting, I'm getting so pissed off. Right. And, uh, for me, which is, you know, it's like, uh, the feelings are so deep down.

They're actually coming up. And, um, but he's, he's also big and too scary. I can't, there's nothing I can do about it. Uh, you know, he'll pummel me in an instant. Uh, but he's like, you know, he's like, he's on his phone and he's got this weird habit of blowing on his popcorn. So he picks up his popcorn. He's like, yeah, I'm on the screen.

I don't know. It's like a monkey right now. Every piece one at a time. Uh, you know, ah, this is fucking weird. There's like two monkeys. And I'm like, what the fuck is this guy doing? Well, the movie is, is so like powerful about like, I don't even remember now, like acceptance and peace and love or whatever it is that like by the end, I'm like, this, that man is the

most beautiful man. I love him. I love him blowing on his popcorn. Uh, and it didn't bug me at all, but there's a craziest thing. It's in a guy like blowing on his popcorn and talking through the whole movie. It's not a good payoff to that story. I wish it doesn't, it should be a better, there is it. Well, do you didn't confront him?

Fuck no. Why would you, you could always go tell on him. You could always go tell on him, you know, just tattletail on him. The guy looked like a, like a heavyweight, you know, WWE. I don't know. Like he was looking, he was in there looking for someone to respond to him so that he could do something. Yeah.

I don't think so. No, I think he was on his own, on his own thing. I think, I think he was ready to, I think he's, he's, that's the kind of person who's like, I'm going to do whatever the fuck I want because I want to get in a fight. Wait, you guys want to hear something funny? Yeah. Going back to the changing your voice thing when I was really feeling really sick, I recorded my voice because for whatever reason, when I have a really bad cold, I can get my voice

super low in a way that I can't ever get it. You want to hear it? Yeah. Sure. We can cut it off. It doesn't play funny, but I listen to this. I'm done. I can get a cold.

I can get my voice down low. Normally, I can't, but if I have cold, I can, whatever reason, I can get it down real low. Are you crazy? Why are you turning into a Southern person? It's funny. You turned into a Southern guy too. I'm doing a bit.

I don't know if I'm allowed to tell this story, but I have a friend who is practicing his James, James Earl Jones impersonation for a gig where he was trying to basically do James Earl Jones's voice. And he was like, he's like, I have to do it. Every time I record, I have to do it first thing in the morning, right when I wake up. And then for the rest of the day, I can't do it just because it's the only time I can get that deep is first thing in the morning. That's a good story.

So you guys, wait, let's try a little experiment just because let's put some energy into the pod. Two stories were told. And by the way, great attempts. You're trying to, you're trying to find content for the, for the pod, but they didn't have great endings. Now, I wonder if you could retell the story, but make up an ending, just make up a completely different ending.

And Charlie, whatever might have happened, well, but it could be fun to cut it into the podcast. Have you tell that incredible story? And then we were going back and it turns out that we, yeah, you know what I'm saying? Okay. So here we go. Let me, so I've got, I've got a friend. I'm not going to say who it is or why he was doing this, but he had to do James Earl Jones's

voice. So he was practicing doing James Earl Jones's voice. It was a very distinct voice, James Earl Jones, as we all know, and it's very, very deep. But my friend could ever get it to sound like actual James Earl Jones was when he first woke up in the morning. So it was the only time he could record James Earl Jones's voice was right first thing in the morning.

And then the rest of the day, he couldn't do that anymore. And then, and then I bought myself a muffin and I ate it. And it was delicious. Okay. I'm going to try. I'm going to try. So, so I'm in the movie theater with a guy, right? He's blowing on his popcorn and he's talking on the, on the, on the fucking thing.

Unbelievable. Right. And, and then he, I think I already know what it's going, God, sorry. No, no, no. He eventually he's like, hang on, I'm going to put you on speaker because he wants to eat more than like one piece of popcorn. Yeah. And he's got the other guy on the speaker and I hear the other guy blowing on popcorn.

And the guy's like, what are you doing? You blowing on your popcorn? He goes, yeah, you blowing on popcorn? He goes, where are you? He goes, I'm in a movie. They're both in a movie theater talking to each other. Did you get a muffin? And then, oh yeah.

And then I look under the seat, what's their free muffin? Yeah, that's always the best ending is when there's a muffin at the end for you to eat. Like that's, that's what I find is always the most satisfying ending. Yeah. How's that, Rob? Did that, that work for you? I thought you were going to say that you were, you eventually had enough and you told this guy to fucking shut up and he, and he stood up and he turned around and he was looming

over you and he was scary as shit. And he was backlit so you couldn't really get a good look at him until the house lights came up and you realized it was James Earl Jones. Whoa. Oh my God. Crazy man. Crazy man. James Earl Jones would never do something like that.

He would never do something. He would never do that. He would never do James Earl Jones. He's a classy guy. Let's talk about that bald cap you're wearing in the episode. Yeah. That's a real look. It's a real look.

Is it because you, you had too much hair to really get it flat so you get that kind of like, the most fascinating look is the bald cap with the toupee on top. Yeah. And I remember we were shooting in Philly obviously at the Logan Circle there, Logan Square, I believe it's called, and I remember the next morning getting a bunch of calls and texts from people saying, Rob, Rob, you're in a newspaper, you're in the newspaper. And you're in the Inky, which is the Philadelphia Inquirer. And sure enough, on the front page down in the lower left hand side, it was telling the

story about how we were shooting in Philly. And they used a photograph of Danny and I walking and I'm wearing the bald cap with no context whatsoever. I'm wearing the bald cap and the wig. And so many people were like, what's, are you okay? Are you okay? What's wrong with you? Do you have malaria or something?

What's going on? Yeah. You don't look good in that. That's the one they went with. No context whatsoever. I remember it just said Danny DeVito, an unknown actor walking through the streets of Philadelphia. Yeah, that's always fun too, and in your hometown too, where all your friends and family can see it.

Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And at a point where we could have probably really used some good press. Yeah. You know, yeah. Sure. I've got some good photos of you directing or not directing, but like being behind camera with that bald cap on, like talking to Rob Thomas and stuff, I'll put them in the pod.

You must have worn it all day when you were like not shooting. Yeah. When that thing goes on, it's hard to take off, so you just kind of keep it on and shoot as much as you can. That's why, if you did a whole movie of it, you just got to shave your head. Take it from me. I thought the erotic tales was really funny. I enjoyed you reading them.

Me too. They definitely made me laugh. Me too. Her breasts were awesome. I think there's a part. Your balls totally rule. Yeah. It's just funny how he goes from eloquent to just blunt.

Yeah. It just kind of makes me want to throw up a little bit. I think it's like I don't want to be associated with that man, you know, Dennis Reynolds. I don't want people to think that I'm that person, you know, but that's my cross to bear, you know, yeah, that's my cross to bear guys. I'm sorry. I got to go to the bathroom. Oh, wow.

Yeah. I'm sorry. One or one or two. Hey, mind your own business, man. All three. All three. What's up, Glenn? I don't know.

Meg, anything? No, guys. I got nothing. I'm halfway to a nervous breakdown right now. Yeah. Why is that? Yeah. That fucking dog.

You're just jealous because I pay attention to anything that isn't you. Look at how cute she is. It's like a Star Wars creature. Oh, yeah. Look at her. Meg, why are you halfway to a nervous breakdown? What's going on over there? I just had like a series of, I don't know, like everything's been hard lately.

Yesterday, there was some sort of water main break on the street outside and we didn't have any water in my house from 6 a.m. to about 7 p.m. at night. And I had picked that day to go on like a long run. So I went out and did like six miles and then I came home and all I wanted was a fucking shower and there was not only no water in my house, but like no running water. I can't even have like a glass of water, you know. Drink and tap water? What do you mean?

Well, no. But yeah, but like even the filtered water that I have runs through the tap water runs through a filter and so there's just no water coming out. And it's just been like a series of stuff like that this week where like everything that can go wrong does go wrong. So this is boring for the pod. Nobody cares about my. I don't care.

So I think people want to hear about, I think people want to hear about trials and tribulations. Well, see, this is the problem though. We've already, we've already established that we're not allowed to really, truly complain about anything in our lives because, you know, because we're so many other people are less fortunate than us. And so we're, you know, I'm looking, listen, I have a lot of stuff I complain about. Okay, let's get into that. What's if you had to complain, if you had to complain about three things, that's all

you had, just three things, what would they be in no particular order because we can ramp up. And you can complain about the number of things that Rob has allowed you to complain about. That could be one of them. But that seems like... Well, I'm just trying to put some structure into it, Meg, I thought you would appreciate that. No, I like it.

Well, I do think that, I do think that no matter what level you are in your life, you know, financially or whatever, there's always going to be some shit to complain about, you know what I mean? Right? I mean, I think everybody can agree on that. I think it's just a matter of like whether or not you decide to share those things, you know, because it's, you know, like the other day when I was telling the story about how I broke my toe, because, you know, my buddy and I were headed down to my office and Jill

came out of her office and we established that we've got two offices in our house. It's like, once you establish you've got two offices in your house and you know, you're just like, I can't, I can't, I can't complain about anything, man. I really can't. Not in public. Oh, okay. So, okay. So number one is that you're complaining about not being able to complain.

That's great. That's a good start. I'm not complaining about not being able to complain. I actually understand why, but, you know, it's, you know, I do like to complain and it does, it does hurt that I can't. You can complain. I like to, I can complain. I can complain about things like the way people parked their cars and how it affects me, you

know what I mean? Because like that, that's universal, you know what I mean? Now if my projector breaks down in my theater room in my house, I probably can't complain about that. Well, you could, you could, but you know, you just keep it off the air. Yeah. Yeah. It's all about who you complain to.

Yeah. Here's something I can complain about. When I was doing my run the other day, I got like body shamed by this person that told me to wear some clothes. I was like running around and I haven't, I've been doing these longer runs and super hot outside. So for the first time in my entire life, I was running with like a sports bra on and like then leggings, but like no tank top on cause it was like cooler that way.

And this woman, I ran past her and she goes, wear some clothes. And I was like, you're in Los Angeles. This is, this is like dowdy for Los Angeles. How old? Oh, 60s probably. Yeah. Next time, next time just yell. She felt threatened.

She was threatened. Next time just yell back. She felt that? Yell back. I hope you die. I hope you die today. Less of you on this earth. Burn in a fire.

Yeah. Like you live in Los Angeles. Like what? Oh, I'm sorry. You've never been to the fucking beach. You've never been to the beach. Yeah. And like honestly what I was wearing like most women wear to brunch, like just a sports

bra on like that's just like an LA staple. And I was actually wearing it to exercise during like the hottest part of the day. But you know, there may only be five people on TikTok who wear more than that. Yeah. The balls on people though, it's like a total stranger. Like you don't know like that, like you could turn around and just beat her to death with a rock. Because you could be.

It is amazing how much, how much women have to deal with like Meg is always telling me stories of my sister because she runs a lot and Caitlin, how often they have to like hear from anybody, whether it's male or female. And I don't think I've ever, I don't think anybody's ever yelled anything at me when I was running ever. Yeah. Right. If you ever been like yelled at while you're walking down the street or running, I don't

think it's ever happened to me. No, but I'm, no, but I'm like that guy in the movie theater with Charlie, like I want, I want it. I want it to, any excuse to just absolutely unleash on somebody is, is, is would be terrific. You know what I mean? Yeah, they can sense it. I wish that you would get the experience, which I and many women have had so many times of having a man stop you on the street to tell you to smile, which is so like just a joy

of women's lives to be like just wander around the neutral expression and have a man stop you and be like, Hey, you know, like the best line I've ever heard is you forgot your smile, baby. Like, and you're like, no, I didn't. I just have a neutral face because I'm just walking down the street and yeah, unfortunately, my neutral fads. I'm always, I'm always like think, I'm always like thinking about stuff. Like I get, you know, I'm just always like thinking or I'm like in my head about something

and then, you know, I walk into a room and, and I don't realize that I have this expression on my face. You know what I mean? Cause I'm looking back and forth and then, and I walk into a room and of course, inevitably somebody, you know, somebody's like, Hey, man, are you, are you okay? And I'm like, Huh? Yeah, I'm fine. Well, you interrupted my, you know, and then I see like, I'm not okay.

You have established that you hate when people ask you if you're okay. I, it irritates the shit out of me. I'm like, don't fucking just, just do, just why? I don't know. It's, I know it shouldn't fucking irritate. Why does that irritate me? Break it down for me, Rob. Like, can you explain why that irritates me?

So I hate it when people ask me if I'm okay. I think I have, I have a theory. I have a theory. Are you okay? Are you okay? I think if I, if I were to pull you aside and say, Glenn, can I talk to you for a second? In fact, I have done this before. And I say, and I say, you seem upset or agitated or in pain or whatever it might be.

Are you okay? Is there anything I can do for you? Would you like to talk about it? You're very receptive to that. Very receptive. Indeed. If someone walks up to you and you seem annoyed or angry, upset or whatever and just goes, what's wrong?

Are you, are you all right? It, the implication is an, I, that I don't care actually how you feel. You're bringing an energy into a room that I actually find repulsive and I'm going to call you out on it. Okay. You have just, yes, you've just, you've just put your finger on it. I think that's exactly what it is. I'm like, I'm like, what the fuck does whatever I'm thinking about or what's going on with

me have to do with you? You do you and I'll do me. It just fuck off. Like, and if you want to be in a good mood, great, be in a good mood. And guess what? You're going to lift me up and I'll be in a good mood in five seconds. I'm not even in a bad mood, but now I am, but that's the problem. It's like, because usually, usually it really is me just like, I'm thinking about something

and, and I'm not in a bad mood and then the person puts me in a bad mood by asking me if I'm in a bad mood. That's the irony of it. Like they've done the opposite. Right. Because the implication isn't, can I help you? The implication is, hey, change your mood because it's bothering me. It's yeah, yeah, yeah, you're affecting, you're affecting my mood.

And I'm like, I shouldn't have that much power over you. I should. I mean, I understand why I do. I'm a very powerful presence. I'm a powerful man. I bring a powerful energy into the room and I get that. I just don't want that burden. And actually I subconsciously respect you less for elevating me to that specific status.

Absolutely. 100%. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. Because I don't, because I don't strive, I don't strive for that. I don't want to be the person who, you know, walks into a room and, you know, affects everybody's mood.

But as you've had to pull me aside when we were, you know, as, as our working relationship, you pulled me aside. I remember specifically, somewhere around season six, I started to lose my mind because I was like, what is my, is my life now? Just this show? Like, what is my life? You know, I had so many other things I wanted to do. And I just was having like a little bit of like a crisis and, and I was bringing a really

kind of like just sour energy, I think, to the set. And, you know, you pulled me aside because you were like, look, I get it. You're going through some shit, like, and we can talk about it. And I'm happy to, you know, we can talk about it whenever you want. But you should just know, and I like that you put it this way, because you weren't telling me, you were, you were just telling, you were basically saying like, you should just know that because you're the boss on this show, or one of the bosses on the show, people are going to be affected by your mood.

And that's just how it is. Like you, whatever energy you bring to set, people are going to be like, oh, oh, oh, oh, you know, because already with, you know, the actors on a show, they, everybody feels like they have to accommodate that person, because if the actor's in a bad place and the actor's in a bad mood, you're fucked, like, you know, the guy lighting a scene can be in a bad mood and still light the scene well, but I can't be in a bad mood and play a happy person or be in a really, really shitty mood and, you know, and be funny. So all of a sudden, everybody's like, oh, okay, I have to, you know, everybody's walking

on eggshells. And so, you know, that's, that's what you were pointing out to me. And I was like, yeah, you're right. You're 100% right. Yeah. And I'm not sure, like, prior to that, I probably exacerbated any given situation. If you were to walk in like that, and I probably did a version of what's wrong with you, suck it up and like, and that's never going to work, right?

It doesn't, it doesn't, that's not the way human beings are. You have to meet people where they are and then, and then accept what the reality of the situation is and then help them, you know, find whatever conclusion they're going to find. But like, still like setting boundaries in a safer environment as opposed to just confronting somebody with how you feel about the way that they feel, which is never going to work. But there is a still a version of that conversation that gets across the same information, but that's just more empathetic and compassionate.

Well, it's also, it's all three of us have been in that position too, I think, um, over the course of doing the show where I think just had a, whether it's like, I don't know about a whole season, maybe, but like days or episodes or weeks in the writer's room. It's usually just in the writer's room because not you though, Charlie, like as you've established, you just stuff it all down. I do stuff most of it down, but I think there's, there's been times like when the last few seasons where I, you know, have been just like burned out or something and we've called each other out.

You get a little snippy, a little irritable or easily easily easily or like easily offended or or something like that. And yeah, that's, that's happened to you too, Rob, where like, yeah, you're like a little down and we have to, we have to talk about it. But, but the thing is, is like, again, it was a good way of communicating it because you didn't tell me what I had to do. You were basically just saying like, Hey, just so you know, here's how your actions are making me feel.

Here's how what you're doing is making us all feel, um, you know what I mean? And then it's kind of like, when I have to take it seriously is like, when I see both of you guys, like when I, when I, when I see both of you come into a room at the same time and one of you says, Hey man, we got to talk in the door shuts. I'm like, this is real because neither one of these guys is big on confrontation and yet they're confronting me about something. So this is a big deal. I already know that they've discussed it outside of the room about how to handle it.

And I'm immediately put in a position of, again, this is coming from a place of respect at like, I'm, I already know I've done something wrong that I need to apologize for. And then you guys let me know what it is. And then I take in the information and I'm almost 100% wrong, uh, every time. And then I apologize and try to do better next time and we move forward. Each one of us has been put in the hot seat at one point or another, being like, Hey man, XYZ doesn't work for the other two of us, you know, so, uh, uh, it's very helpful. But the most healthy thing is that all three of us miraculously don't have that gene to

not hear that, you know, where there's certain people that you could be a partner with who just would not hear it, would not hear the other two people would be like, fuck you. I'm not doing this and just couldn't take it. And I don't know what that is, but we, we take our lumps well. I think some of it, some of it really is the approach. I think the three of us at least strive to be the kinds of people that can deliver that information without it, you know, just being offensive or without getting the person's defenses up without, you know, like you have to be able to communicate those things well.

Otherwise, you know, cause if, if Robert just pulled me aside and been like, Hey dude, you're being a dick, you're being a fucking dick and you need to stop. Like that would not have worked. Like I would not have been like, you're right. Like that's not my personality. My personality would have been like, Hey man, I'm going through some shit. Go fuck yourself. Like, yeah, I'm being a fucking dick.

Like it just would have made me more angry, you know what I mean? But because he communicated it well, it, it worked and it was effective in it. And it did kind of melt me in that moment. Like I, I felt my defenses, I actually weirdly also, you know, like, you know, in that moment felt seen acknowledged, you know what I mean? Like it was, it was a, it was an acknowledgement that didn't put me on my heels, didn't make me defensive. And I, I mean, I, there's no way that the three of us could have worked together for

this long without having those moments where we had to pull one person aside and be like, Hey, what's going on? Cause, you know, this is what's happening and this is how we see it. And it's, it's, you know, we need to talk about it. Well, this is all leading to the moment, Meg, where, where we have to, we have to talk to you. The three of us have, we've, we've talked off camera. And this is the moment where we have a secret weapon, which is I'm comfortable crying in

front of all of you. And I don't think you're as comfortable watching me cry as I am comfortable. Well, it probably is at this point. Well, no, but that's what we wanted to, that's actually what we want to, but that's what we wanted to talk to you about, Meg. We just want you to smile more. I mean, we just, we just wish you would smile more. Just smile.

It's so, you know, it's so nice when you smile and smile, honey. Listen, whenever you feel sad, just smile and be glad and the feelings will go away. Today we are sponsored in part by Zell. When anyone sends you money or if you need to get paid back, always ask for Zell. Yeah. With Zell, see the money goes straight into your bank account and it works even if the sender banks somewhere different from you in the US. Oh, that's actually perfect because you guys all owe me for the t-shirts from tour.

What are you talking about? We owe you money? We were paid? No. No. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Remember that we decided beforehand that we were all going to split the costs and it's okay because you can just pay me back on Zell. It'll be really simple and easy. Meg, I think it's that we got a bad whiffy connection and maybe it's just, I don't know if it's good. Yeah, it really did not. It's off. Anyway, when you use Zell, the money sent goes straight into your bank account, typically

in minutes between enrolled users. Plus, Zell is probably already in your banking app because it's in over 1,600 different banking apps in the US, so you don't have to download a new app. You can just give me a check. If you really want to, I just thought Zell would be easier. I'm hearing something, but Meg, I'm not catching a lot of it. There's a terrible lot. Okay.

Yeah, I'm also not hearing her. In the meantime, listeners, look for Zell in your banking app today. You know what's a crazy and maddening part of the experience is that there is no one way to write an episode. There is no correct way to do it. I don't know about you guys. I'm sure you feel the same way where I'm going back and I'm watching all the episodes and I'm trying to... I sort of watch everything analytically.

What worked? What didn't work so much? How can we do better? How can I do better with this show or other things that I might try to write? I have a hard time ever turning those questions off, but the truth is, I'm nowhere closer to an answer than when we first started doing this show. I don't really know why one episode of Sunny is a home run and another one is like, doesn't quite add up.

I haven't figured that out. Are you guys excited to get back into the writers room this year because we're back to start in like a month? Yeah, I actually had a couple good ideas that I wrote some notes down that I won't say, but I'm excited to share with you guys. The eight ideas that we can just turn into eight episodes and be done with that. It's one idea. It's definitely one episode.

I'm excited about the prospect of bringing the podcast into the writers room and having people take a look at how we start the show. It might be really fun to do a podcast episode that soup to nuts an entire episode, an empty whiteboard with no ideas. How do we turn that into a fully realized episode of Sunny and do a podcast about that? I think that could be fun. Kind of interesting. Yeah, that'd be interesting for sure.

I wonder, we'd have to hold that probably until after we aired the episode or no. Do you think we could actually air that? But why not? Yeah. Yeah. Or maybe we drop it in installments. At the same time on Hulu, at the same time that the episode comes out, we could do that. Well, I've got no ideas going into this next season.

I'm terrified to go back in the writers room. The first couple of days are always really fun because we're just getting back in a room together and everybody's that energy's popping and we're making fun of what everybody's wearing and their weird hats and hairdos and who's going gray and all that kind of stuff and it's all fun and games. It's better not to come in with ideas, I feel like, because they get stale, right? If you have an idea, those first couple of note cards almost never get used. The first episode you break is always the one you're like, eh, that one.

I don't know. Yeah, it's like, yeah, you've got all these great ideas for these great episodes and then everybody's just like, yeah, but I kind of like the cat in the wall one. Yeah, really, yeah. No, but you've got to come in with them. It's just, they're all just jumping off points, you know what I mean? It's good to have some jumping off points. Meg, do you have ideas for this season?

I have one idea, but I've already pitched it to you guys last season, which is just that the gang. Oh, yeah. That's right. Oh, yeah. But truly, I can't pitch things like this, but the thing I, the podcast has made me want to do is just more like really simple stories about like somebody wanting to be somebody's best friend or like, you know, like just this, even this episode, the idea of just starting

out with Charlie and Dee being like, you couldn't walk a mile in my shoes is such a funny jumping off point for like an episode. And it's so small. It's not like based on current events or like anything like that. And I really enjoy that stuff. So I guess I'm going to endeavor to try to pitch stuff like that. Yeah. Well, it's really funny, right?

Because that's going back to what I was saying about like, it's so hard to kind of crack that nut, right? So like Mac and Dennis break up or whatever, such a funny episode, like, you know, these like really small, personal ones that all take place on our sets and in our apartments can be so fun. And yet the one where we go to the water park is just fantastic or the Jersey Shore, right? So, you know, it's just hard. It's hard to know.

I guess you got to do it all. You got to try different things. That's the gig, right? We're just trying different things with these characters and hopefully most of the time it works. And sometimes it's not as strong as the next one, but that's the beauty of television. You got the next episode to go improve by why are you shaking your head? Rob's shaking his head.

No, sorry. Because Glenn said we tried them all, but we haven't. We haven't. We haven't. We haven't. We've only halfway through the run, bud. Halfway through. Yeah.