The Always Sunny Podcast - The Great Recession

Episode Date: February 20, 2023

Marion this is not your wave, bro!

Maybe I'll start the episode this way Dead air, but that's just on our phones. Yeah I'm just I don't want to waste any of the conversation. I don't either and also I'm sure you guys feel the same. There's always like a million emails and things There he is he's in the building He's in the building. Oh, there he goes What's known as a false start We're not gonna we're not gonna be talking about

No, I don't mind Oh, no, no, he's not he's not he's still he's got a 45 was the email 45 what we did say to get tested for a nine-time God forbid things start a little early when everybody's busy, but we love to but we're not go ahead This is not Okay, now we go silent again. Oh Man Now to be clear and fair to Glenn he is six minutes seven minutes early. Yeah, right? You're super early

You're super early. I just didn't want you to feel bad because I know how bad you feel about a new band shirt Which the fans will like, you know, what's that? Oh band shirt. Yeah, and it's new. The band is not new This shirt is new. It's not that new No, but I haven't I've been worn it that many times that two of them And I think I got I think I grabbed the one that I don't wear as much Okay, now notice that you flipped up the cuff. I've got a large and a medium and this is the this is the large Sleeves a little long. So the sleeves are a little long on it. So I flipped the I flipped it a little bit Yeah, I don't like it. I don't like it when this I wish that t-shirts were made. Let's get into this

Tell us what's wrong with t-shirt t-shirts You know the problem with shirts the problem with life is is when you're the type of person who has a fucking opinion about Everything you know, you're like a strong take on like everything. You're like, I just wish the t-shirts now this but are all seriousness I I wish that t-shirts sleeves were just a little shorter. I don't know You can't see I can't seem to find one that is the sleeveless. Yeah, you want like a Vinnie Bobarino. Look Stop to go and Vinnie Bobarino. I don't need to go full. Yeah, it's like literally coach dad now But like you don't want that you still want to be able to be like I could work on this car if I need to yeah Yeah, you know not get grease on my mid arm

You were at the Super Bowl. I was at the correct the Super Bowl. Yeah now That's an event held every year for the for creeps and listeners who aren't familiar with the The sport of American football Are they planning on doing it like every year or? I think that's the plan. Yeah. Wow. Yeah for the foreseeable future, right? So then does in that Regard then like is there any point to it at all? Well, yes, because every single person that's on those teams Represents that town that they're from

Yeah, I know I have I have an interesting thing in my household where I have one son Who who has taken such great interest in in in football sports in general and he'll and he just absolutely loves the NFL And he watches every game. He's both an Eagles fan and a Chargers fan because he lives in Los Angeles And so he's really embraced it. I have another Rams fan. No likes the Chargers and I have another San Diego's team Let's be another son who does not give a flying fuck about the NFL watching football on Sundays Now he does watch soccer he and I would get a lot of football football with me

Yeah, okay on Sunday, so but then he I brought him to the NFC championship game And my one son was just all over it and my other son was just sitting there not truly not not caring at all Yeah, he was excited because we were excited, but then then he asked me subsequently Why do you care about this and I said I don't know how to explain it? Can you explain it actually I can try to explain it because I can because I don't I can't figure out I would love to care about I actually do enjoy watching football Yeah, I really do. I I really enjoy what I don't enjoy is the fact that a one-hour game lasts four hours. Well, sure That's ridiculous. I would say I can explain it this way. Well, now first of all, he does watch

Foot I'll call it soccer for our audience. Let's call it. So he watches soccer And he's a big fan of rexum and he watches soccer with me every Saturday morning and he's so he gung-ho for rexum He just doesn't care about American football. I will say in terms of caring about I know I'm caring about professional sports and why you should care about it or why people do I've got another whole television series. That's about this very thing. If you just checked it out You should check it out. It's called welcome. I just don't care to watch it. You know what I mean? I just don't care. I just don't care That's fair

But if you just check out the first five to ten minutes, you might see why other people Across the globe have embraced the television series I'm growing up in New England and with my buddies and everyone was a Red Sox fan And so it has been a bit of a bummer to be out in Los Angeles and you lose a little bit of that Even though people love the doctors and they love the Lakers and they love it's cool Community on the sports bars and the Gathering I think that's the problem for me out here having grown up all over the world and and not even always even in the United States and then settling in a state that doesn't have any

Great professional sports teams like Alabama. Well, you could roll tide Is a professional sports team sure well, yeah To make a shitload of money for there There's an argument for the organization The Georgia Bulldogs are an NFL team could beat half the NFL teams. Well that now see why hasn't that been done? It's just an exhibition match, you know the the top NFL team versus well, buddy I got a whole sport to sell you it's called soccer here in the United States But but in the across and that very thing that you just said does exist

That's the beauty of the English football system. We get it. You have a football team You have a soccer know what I'm saying is that you you have lower league teams that play Higher league teams and you you see that very thing happen Yeah, you like boxing and the idea that there could be an upset that some scrappy kid from the middle of nowhere Can beat the champ? I like that. I mean that's rocky That's rocky. Okay Sports movie ever made but even Alabama I was there from like 10 to 18 You know and I was an Auburn fan while I was there, but then once I left

Literally nobody gave a shit when I where I went to college. Nobody cared about college football Nobody it was all about NFL football and those like yeah, but I haven't really been in it I don't know, but I mean I did grow up I was a I was a Raiders fan growing up and And a 49 I don't know how you can be a 49ers fan and a Raiders fan, but I was a 49er. It could be whatever you want Well, okay. Thanks, man. Yeah, appreciate that. I appreciate the permission But then I just I don't know man I can't well, it's also it's also like if the game was

Well, it's two hours, right? Yeah with commercials. I think I'd be more likely to watch it It's just about the finding the story the story that you identify with and the thing that you fall in love with in the same way that you Could go and watch a play that's 20 minutes long That sucks and want to leave after 10 minutes or you could watch I've heard you talk about a four-hour play that you were riveted by Right exactly amazing or a movie The story you care you care, but see that you gotta find ways you gotta find reasons Yes, a hundred percent and that's why that's why all those shows like all those competition shows like American Idol and stuff It's all about the it's the story

It's not like yes, the singing is extraordinary But it doesn't mean anything if you don't know the person's background and they don't you know having a compelling and I got a whole show If a whole series for you, it's a song. Yeah, it's always sunny. We cover that. Yeah We do cover that on it's always sunny in Philadelphia the the show that we should really be here to talk about Yeah You know we where we talk about the reason we say why all the shows work why people watch sports and into it's always I don't know. I have I have a good segue. I think I Have a good sunny. I really I have a good transition the whole time. Well, I have a good transition

Well, can I just say one more thing one of I think that's one of the things I always really responded to when it came to boxing was it's two people willing to get in the ring the most physically like exhausting sport, you know MMA certainly but like You know just getting your just pounding someone and getting pounded by somebody and there's no teammates To rely upon, you know, I mean, yes, you've got your coaches. You got your cut man. You got you know all this but like just the savagery of one person versus another with intent to kill Yeah, that's what gets you off

That's what gets you out. There was that sort of like a gladiator sort of style where there was like three or four of them and the lion Loose Okay, so you it's not you're into the team if I know the back story, you know the back story Like there's too many people on the football team. I can't memorize everybody's back story I don't have time for that. What would speed it up get rid of the refs Just let the boys fight it out. Just play it out. You know what I mean? No penalty is just like whatever just bash bash your way up and down the field Yeah, no one's upset about you know whizzles and calls. Just just just no refs. Just the clock has started

You know the rules go that would have helped me out this weekend. That would have helped me out Well, there was one particular call at the end of the game that That was brutal now at the holding call. Yes, but you can't complain about it They shouldn't have been in there in a position in the first place Yeah, but that's a that's a that's a brutal game changing call. It's not the reason that they lost It's just it would have been more fun to see the Eagles with the ball at the end of the game with down three instead of down seven With six seconds left. That's yeah. Yeah, but that's the sport and I'll say that I was pretty bummed, of course It was a great season now thus far this year

I've watched the teams that I love and follow lose come in second place No, which is essentially which is losing in the championship game or there or the version there of the FA trophy final the league final in the EPL Or the English system the Phillies lose the World Series the Philadelphia Union lose the MLS Cup and now the Eagles losing the Super Bowl all in person Well, listen get used to it, buddy

I mean, it's always sunny in Philadelphia is the second place of TV shows Oh, I think we're like the 15th place We're number one in one category, but you can't win if they don't let you in the competition, you know what I mean High five from over on this day. Yeah They're scared to fight the street fighter, but my transition is that I was pretty you know, I was pretty bummed. I came home Leo was pretty bummed. I took my son Leo and We got home and then I realized oh, we have this the podcast tomorrow That's something to look forward to and I get to watch an episode of sunny. So I thought okay

I'll cheer him up. He gets to watch a very few episodes of sunny not quite old enough yet But we just popped it in and we watched it and man this episode is so funny And kid friendly safe this one. It made it made me very happy. We were laughing I'll point out a couple of areas where he laughed out loud because it's interesting to see what a 10-year-old can laugh And when I was laughing as hard as I've ever laughed at this show, let me let me guess the laugh out loud Say Danny hanging himself and then pop it up. So don't try to stop me Don't try to stop me. Oh my god. That was me laughing. Leo was very confused at that Okay, okay, I didn't quite understand any cut in his

Knife Danny cut me with it with a knife Slade I mean we were both he was Leo's laughing so hard And then I was laughing at that and then him laughing that I started crying laughing it Yeah, and then that got him going so good. I got big Chris Farley vibes off of that. Yeah, it's his Oh Yeah, yeah, yeah But then him taking his briefcase into the bathroom

Tussent turns man Conversations which don't have like crazy twists and turns but are very very just funny Conversations well, this is where we can talk a little bit about the business of making the television series because that's what we really got Boned in that circumstance what we may have mentioned this on the podcast before but we'll bring it up again Yeah, since this is the episode ad sales really boned us on this one. Yeah, what if you recall? I remember yeah big time Well, they reached out to us and said would you be interested in doing some kind of product placement? Which we've done in the past sure right cores Actually, we've done a ton of them and they said Dave and Buster's and we said sure

What it would be funny if we just actually didn't just say Dave and Buster's but like made an episode about it I'm like kind of making fun of it But also kind of embracing it and It wasn't also like a light suggestion that we were early in our game And it was more like guys you have to do this because Dave and Buster's is not going to give the show a lot of money It was like of course We can't force you but we really strongly suggest you find a way to work it into an episode. We're like Oh, we're smart guys. We can do something and talk about Dave and Buster's and have it be funny

I think we also found it like I you know It's always funny when you have to make the unexpected choice of like the characters actually like really respecting and loving That's a really funny place for us to have an episode so great Let's do it. Yeah, so so we had that going and we and we made that and it's a business and we They we needed to keep making the show and they came to us and said we need to keep paying for the show Would you guys help us out? So sure. So sure. So but what we didn't know was that they also made a massive ad sales by Right, right. They were for the right. So what was happening was yes They were airing. They was the sole sponsor of the evening

Yeah, and you would you were watching the show where where the characters are talking about Dave and Buster's then they would cut To a commercial and the first commercial you would see is a Dave and Buster's Yeah, I know people went Bull people are rightfully pissed off and like, you know, like now if you go watch that in Streaming or however, you're finding the show big deal, right? You're like if they're in Dave and Buster's, it's funny But yeah, man combine it with a Dave and Buster's commercial every yeah That that seems like foolish on there on their part like you're actually getting less for your money in that sense because You're in you're enraging people. You're enraging people. Yes, and that is what happens

So we so I remember a bunch of phone frantic phone calls. Maybe it wasn't even that night It was the next day we saw each other and and then and then we called FX and we were like, what the fuck like you? You completely like hung us out to dry You asked us to be your good partner and then you did something like that and to their credit They came back and said it was just a miscommunication and a mistake and so well, and I wanted to be clear to I mean, you know to be clear to the audience this When a show does product placement the money goes to the network So it doesn't go into the pot that we don't make that money. We don't make any money off that

Including the ad sales. No, we don't make any of that none of that But but what it does is it justifies the cost of making the show for the network. Yeah, so we're indirectly Yeah, because they're more likely to continue licensing the show because they're not spending as much and yeah, I was doing a Golf tournament thing like and and There was a guy there and I guess his job is like Hooking people up and connecting celebrities with things. I don't know. He was Not affiliated with me who's really someone else perfectly nice guy I'm not totally trying to drag him, but he kept saying to Mary Elizabeth and I you know if you want I can you know

I can get you guys into Dave and Buster's and I'm thinking like Oh, I get in today Anybody yeah, you you being polite like, huh? Yeah, oh, thanks, man. Thanks so much. She's like Wait, wait, you profusely thanked him for a little bit. Yeah, okay. Yeah, you're just trying to yeah You just want to I don't want to lean into it. You know sure but uh You kept doing it and kept you know Frequently be like guys. Let me know You know if you need that David Buster, so I got like what on earth

What on earth I can get into David Buster's We never figured it out. I let it I let it so I thought you were gonna say that you finally figured out what the hell He was talking about like he's gonna let you know I think his thing was like he knows people you can get your tickets like good tickets to Lakers or something I don't I don't know if you want to get me an unlimited power card Maybe that's what he meant. Maybe that's what he meant. Maybe that's Then lead with that don't tell me you can get me in a David Buster's yeah, cuz I can get in myself I got legs anybody can get into

Yeah, I was thinking last night of how many I use the door We've talked about how many presidential terms the show has seen But I was thinking last night in terms of the the cyclical nature of them of the markets How many how many economic? Yeah up swings and downturns have we gone through right and it's it's it's really two major major Recessions although, I don't know that we can consider ourselves in a recession quite yet right now But but like it was like peak peak market when we started it was like getting up into like 2007 Yeah, then a crash then it came back and now we're

We're in an inflate a period of inflation right now. Yes, we may or may also not be dealing with on the show Well, we are yeah, that's okay. We are we can talk about it, right? Yeah You don't know how we deal with it. Yeah, you don't know you don't know you have to do it stupid. We know So what else? the recession episode yeah the conversations about about not understanding how money works not understanding how Economics work finances work

All the all those were very funny conversations to write and conceive of like I especially that that that last speech that we have We're you know, we're trying to figure out how the money circulates and how how a self-sustaining economy works and not understand not Born out of a bunch of comedy writers in a room like all asking each other like wait How does it I think there was nobody that took an economics class now? Yeah, we're gonna be fine something like this Yeah, it's just something like the money Meg could you explain to us how the I tell you one thing I was right about months and months and months ago on this podcast and I

I feel like I got dragged a little bit for saying it though But like well the gas prices went through the roof and I was like it's insane I'd like just just charged less for gas like and And maybe as an oil company, you don't profit as much They you know, they just released their profits, and they're like oh, it's astronomical. Yeah, like guys. We did fantastic We did great come on it. They're killing people like I try to know how it works. Yes, I do. Wait, who's who drag Who's dragging you people online? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah people wait a second people online Online online

I was right. They're just taking your money You heard it here guys. You're wrong and Charlie was right. So shut the fuck shut the fuck up and stop paying so much If you don't know the shot then don't take the fucking shot Now these guys don't pay for gas. Yeah, to be clear neither. There's no electric cars Now Megan, how does the economy work? No, that makes I also have no idea how the economy works. That's why I'm asking because I do feel like it works with greed and mmm and wealth and greed

creates wealth and When too much greed creates too much wealth and no one else has wealth and they're like oh now we got a little bit of an issue and Let's charge You're describing as a revolution The meek shall inherit the earth. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait The meek shall inherit the earth. Oh fuck yeah, greatest Hey So you don't want to be up here on this on top of this mountain on this on this gold house

Okay, because the meek shall inherit the earth. So That's how the economy works isn't it like we control the masses through religion. Yeah, yeah We keep the meek meek. It's meek poor or is meek just like kind of like scared of loud noises, you know, I It's not a very flattering term. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you don't want to be known as a meek man Yeah, and it's weirdly close to mink. So I think I'm like a little animal like a little mink Yeah, dude, we know so much about the economy Guys I'm trying to hire someone to do press for me and I can't find the right person you mean like a publicist Yeah, no ideally someone who just like does it for me

So I don't have to you know I give them the talking points to hit and I say, you know You pretend you're me and then you know then I go tell them to hit those points. It sounds like you're the publicist then No, I'm just a guy at home Not doing all the press, you know, okay But one of the biggest hiring challenges of 2023 is Standing out to top candidates. Yeah, you want to stand out. Well, then you should use zip recruiter Absolutely

Zip recruiters technology sends you great candidates and makes it easy for them to apply to your job instead of filling out a long Application they can learn all about you and apply with just a click Okay, so but you in the in your situation that you were describing Charlie You would need someone who looks like you, right? Mm-hmm like a press Somebody do the press a double a double. Yeah, ideally. Yeah. Yeah, they do let you set attention grabbing labels on zip recruiter I don't know if you guys know this but like you can put like urgent Training provided, you know remote and more all kinds of labels, you know, maybe you can set A doppelganger or two. Maybe you can do that. Maybe, you know, you can find out for free right now at zip recruiter comm

Get your job noticed by the best and brightest candidates with zip recruiter four out of five employers who post on zip recruiter Get a quality candidate within the first day. That's impressive. So see for yourself Go to this exclusive web address to try zip recruiter for free zip recruiter comm Sunny again that's zip recruiter comm slash S u n n y zip recruiter the smartest way to hire so smart This show is sponsored by better help an online therapy service that can help you feel like your best self We've heard when Charlie and Glenn feel like their best selves on the golf course and after a cold shower

But Rob, when do you feel like your best self? After rex on the clinch is a big match. Ah and clinching matches. That's Welsh for win a game Yes, well, that's English, but yes, of course That's never a guarantee that they're going to clinch sometimes you're supposed to win and you don't sometimes you're not supposed to win And you do is this all to say you wish there was some kind of sports therapy to help you cope with the stress of owning a football club I'm all for therapy and if the licensed professionals on better help have positive coping skills for tough matches Like the Super Bowl by all means you've tried it. You guys have tried it, right? Oh, yeah Yeah, I've tried it and my dilemma wasn't really about clinching soccer matches

But still I found it very straightforward and beneficial plus it's flexible affordable and entirely online So when I needed an expert to work with me, I was always able to find someone guys If you want a more empowered life therapy can get you there visit better help dot com slash sunny today to get 10% off your first month That's better help H ELP dot com slash sunny Speaking of things that you don't know in this episode. There's a classic quote that doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about stars to dispute Yes, yeah, that's definitely that was Robert Zell. I remember him Yeah, pitching or writing that line to me like that is so good. Yes, because Charlie thinks that he burns trash which turns into smoke Which turns into stars. Yeah. Yeah, that's a good one

Shot a lot of this one in Philly. Yes. It's a good. Oh, yeah Yeah, all that stuff the with you being crab people and the David Busters was in Philly. Oh That was that waitress that was yes That's good. We're low you don't want to keep those coming Yeah, it might be a little cheaper if he's won with a bottle of wine instead of chugging the individual glass Yeah, maybe leave the judgment back in the kitchen. There's a little bit of a look of judgment on your face Just go grab them and okay. No problem. All right. Thank you. Great. Oh, she's terrific I like her. Yeah, but she must have been

Yeah, I think she was she must have been for her. She might have been from Jersey. Hmm. Yeah She was great. She nailed it. Yeah, she did um I Like I do like that. We stained our our mouths. Yeah. Yeah purple That was that may have been the first time we did that and that comes back quite a bit Oh, right. Leah loved that that killed with the ten-year-olds He was like, are you wearing lipstick and I said no, it's it's from the red wine and he was like the red wine makes your lips Red, I'm like, well if you drink enough of it and he's like you guys drink so much. That's so funny. I'm like, well It's funny in this context

But I do like that I do like that we we we sense some judgment We I like opening the scene with us just chugging the line and then and then she's telling us that it's cheaper to just buy a Bottle and we don't want to hear any sass from You know, I bet that we had shot the Intervention episode first and then we went down to Philly to do the Philly shoot and we're like it was so funny to have those red I think you're right. Yeah, I think you're right. I think we and we realized we're like well We've already established that when we're drinking lots of red wine. We have that and it's funny. So let's let's go for it Yeah, yeah, we would have gone to Philly at the end. We always went at the end. Yeah

Yeah, we'd shoot everything in LA and then the last week. I'm not telling you guys I'm telling the audience The we would take a while since we got back to that Of you being worried that Rob's gonna jump in and be like, I know this. You're telling me when we used to shoot in Philly Remember that? You want to re-litigate that? I'll re-litigate that. Yeah, you wanna re-litigate? Once again, it has nothing to do It's the way that you're posi- Just the second day of the shoot. I didn't really want to read it. I'm listening. Go on, go on It's just seething inward

Man, oh nerd Uncle Jack back in this episode for the first time since season one, right? What made you guys decide to bring Uncle Jack back? He's just so damn funny Why did it take so long? Why did it take so long? I was thinking that I was like, but is this the first time we've had him since season one? Yeah, yeah, that's what you were just crazy. I don't know why maybe we just Hadn't thought of where he would fit in an episode or whatever it is. Yeah. Yeah Um, I thought maybe you guys might like to watch the blooper of him and Charlie Doing something in this episode that he that he doesn't do what is it and then I thought maybe it's it's probably in the bloopers

It's probably the bloopers him him just pointing to Uncle Jack. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's the bloopers. That's the bloopers Yeah, I was just waiting for that moment and then it didn't happen You hand you powing around getting crazy and nuts and all sorts of things Oh, come on Limerie staying in it What if we set up your room just like it was when you were a kid? Yeah, it's in a dividing line all improvised I remember every I'm a bunny. You're a bunny snuggle snuggle. She's killing it revive much out of that skin my teeth

No, we definitely would have used that if you had a straight face. Oh, you boys. Boys will not be boys. Boys will be men. Men will be men. Men will be men and act like men now. We can be men. We can be men.

We can be men. He's so good. And then she's so good as well. Yeah, just in it. Total pros. Now, this was hard to explain to Leo because I was laughing so hard and he was like, well, so why is this funny? And I was like, well, because the older man is inappropriate.

He's just being inappropriate. And Leo's like, well, how? Why is he inappropriate? Like, should they not be? Because they talk about wrestling. He just wants to have a good time with his nephew. Right. And at some point he says something about wrestling

and how you guys are going to wrestle. And you said, like, uncles don't wrestle with their nephews. And Leo was like, why can't uncles wrestle with nephews? And I was like, well, the next scene is starting. So let's just do it. It's just some uncles, Leo. Some uncles shouldn't be allowed to wrestle. I think episode is maybe passable or appropriate.

I'm like, well, okay, there's this scene. Well, this is why I don't watch the show with my kids. Yeah. Yeah. This is pretty cool. This is a close one. It had some big laugh out moments. But him swinging on that thing, the visual gag of that, of the noose.

Yeah. That's great. Also falls in the category of Danny just being up for anything. Anything. Yeah. I mean, how old was he there? He was, I don't know. I mean, 67?

Yeah, late 60s probably. Late 68? Yeah. I mean, it's not like we actually hung him. We did hoist him in the air. We hoisted him. It's uncomfortable. It's very uncomfortable.

That harness goes up around. It goes up around your crotch. Yeah. And then, but I remember we had to like work with it because it didn't seem like, you know, it suspends you by your waist. And then you kind of start to tilt forward and then it doesn't look like the pressure is on your neck. Yeah.

So Danny had to kind of like hoist his weight forward so that his head could go back so that it looked like he was hanging and then lower his chin. But then it was a funny position to be in when he looked up and said, don't try to stop. Yeah. And then those kicks he does at the end. Like he's trying. He's trying. He's trying.

He's like. That was another result line. I remember tight. I really like Charlie's sort of like manic energy in this episode. And there's one specific shot where you guys are like, we're going to give you a chance. You tell D and Charlie, we're going to give you a chance to justify your jobs. And you do this, like, I'm so excited to like prove to you like that, that energy. And then Rob's just enjoying it.

Like it felt like you were like out of character just watching him being like, I like this guy. He's up for it. Yeah, we were going to get a show. The way that it ends is so funny too. You guys think you're going to go to David Buster's and I just go, you know, and D's going, what? And then we just like hard cut out.

I don't remember that being the ending. I, I rewound it because I was like, is that coming? Sure. We had. There was a whole more. And it just felt flat. And we're like, just go out there. I just don't remember.

I don't remember that episode ending that way. I don't remember us. Me neither. I was watching that being like, okay, wait, how's it going to end? I don't know. I can't remember. I thought I had accidentally hit the fast forward button or something. Like, yeah, it was a little too abrupt for me.

I don't know. I thought it was joyfully abrupt where I was like, oh, oh, great. That's great. Like sometimes it's not fun when we tuck it in too much. And then it's like, it feels too neat, you know. Tuck it in too much. I like that. Yeah.

Yeah, I like that. Yeah. It's like, you just go to bed. Just slam the door in the episode. Yeah. Yeah, yell at it to go to bed and slam the door on it. Go to bed. Danny with the vacuum cleaner.

And we had written it one way and he kept saying it because it doesn't have any muffler. Right. And we probably think we'd written like, you know, cover your ears. This sucker ain't got no muffler. And he wouldn't say he ain't got no. He used to refuse to say that. He would write it in the script all the time. It wasn't intentional.

It wasn't like, I don't think Frank talks like this. It's just that he would, you know, we're moving fast and you're learning things on the fly and his mind would just translate it to better English. Joe was a good choice too to really ramp up the sound of that thing and make it insanely loud and then put subtitles on them unless they were like screaming. Yeah. Especially Caitlyn screaming, you jerk. You jerk.

Yeah, that's great. I was going to ask if you guys have ever been fired from a job. I don't know if we've talked about that. Have you ever been fired from a job? I feel like we did talk. Do we not talk about that? What? Having been fired from someone?

Having been fired. I've been edited out of various movies and television shows over here. That's a form of fire. Have we talked about that? Yes. That we've talked about. Yes. Yes.

We talked about the Warner Brothers one, I think. The Devil's Gone. Yes. I'm glad. It's never really taken the wind out of a lot of people's sails, but instead it just made your wind blow harder. Just fueled my fire. Just fueled your fire.

It just made the chip on the shoulder just a little bit larger. That's right. Yeah. I remember when we were younger, when we were young men in our 20s and you would say, you used to tell me that you had this little demon that would wake you up in the mornings. That was basically, like, the thing that would. Get up. Well, no.

Get up. The thing that would get him out of bed was this little demon voice in your head that was basically telling you that you were lazy, that you were a piece of shit, that you weren't doing enough, that you were, yeah. Good morning. You're making a little piece of shit. Get up and write five screen plays. First make a drink, a cup of coffee, smoke 17 cigarettes, and then write it on a script.

God damn you. Go hook up with anyone who will hook up with you. Anyone who will pay attention to you. Yeah. Yeah. I remember that guy. Yeah. That's still there.

Yeah. That's still there. God hold it. A version of that's still there. But I never found it necessarily destructive. I found it kind of, but it can very easily go in there. You described it in comic terms. In comic terms.

I love you, you lazy son of a bitch. Now get up. Yeah. It was more like that. Okay. It was more like it was an extension of myself, not some exterior being that was saying that I was unworthy or something. It's Meredith Burgess from Rocky.

It's more Meredith Burgess. Lightning and craps under the day. Yeah. His name was Meredith. Yeah. That's interesting. That's not a man named Meredith. His name was Burgess.

Burgess. I mean equally. Equally strange. That's Burgess Meredith. You know what John Wayne's name was? No, I don't. What is real name? Wayne John.

What is real name? I don't know what. What is real name? Oh, Marion Johnson. Marion? No. I don't remember what his last. I don't think it might be.

Marion Wayne? It knows. Marion Robert Morrison. Marion Wayne. Morris. Marion Morrison. Which by the way is an awesome name too. Marion Morrison.

Marion Morrison. But not as awesome as John Wayne. Yeah. I'm surprised he wouldn't even go with just the Robert Morrison. But I guess if John Wayne's on the table, he's going to take that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Like I feel like I'm a John Wayne type. I don't know. That's not good. That's how he did it. Yeah. It was back in the day when the studios were like. He was once credited as Duke Morrison.

Because everybody called him Duke apparently. That was the Duke or Duke. Right. It was like some studio guys back in the day. He was in here. We're going to call you this. You know. You're going to do 10 pictures for us.

But I like the idea that. Pay a thousand dollars. That Marion Morrison sounded too ethnic. That was the thing. They wanted to make everything seem as like waspy as possible. Like John Wayne just feels like an American. You know. They were like no Jews, no Irish, no Italians.

Like let's just keep it like right down the middle. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You can be those things but your name can't indicate as much. Yes. Right. Fox studio chief Winfield Sheehan rejected his name as it sounded to Italian.

And then a director Raoul Walsh who cast John Wayne and stuff. Suggested John Wayne because it sounded more. Less Italian I guess. Kind of makes John Wayne seem like a little bit of a pussy. Right. He backed down from that. He didn't stand up for his own name, his own heritage. He could have said God damn it.

I'm Marion Morrison and that's all there is to it. You know. And instead he was like I'll do whatever you say. Boss. Fucking John. That's not the John Wayne I know. And remember. Yeah.

He was an actor. I used to do Shakespeare. Yeah. Exactly. Do I sing and dance in this picture? How did John Wayne become an actor? Did he start? Did he start?

Was he doing? He went to USC which is odd. Did he play football? Yeah. He was an athlete. That sounds right. He was huge. He was like 6'5 or something.

6'4 or 6'5. Right. And he was an athlete. And then. He was injured and lost his athletic scholarship and had to leave the university. I thought you were going to say he lost his knee or something. Oh no. By the way back in the day when you got a scholarship to play a sport and then if you got injured

they were like okay get the fuck out. Can you imagine that? Can you imagine that just because you tore your ACL you're halfway through your education and they're like yeah you know that thing we brought you in for you can't do it anymore so you got to go. Yeah. That's incredible. Yeah.

They got rid of that. Sorry Marion. You're out of here. He broke his collar bone which as we all know is a really cool injury. That's pretty fucking sweet dude. Yeah. Did he do it? Did he do it shredding?

Was he shredding? Was he shredding? In a body surfing accident. What? Was he shredding? Was he shredding water? Wow. That's pretty cool.

Wait. Wait. John. Wait. Sorry. Who broke his collar? I'm getting it. John Wayne.

Sorry. Marion Morrison. Yes. When he was attending USC had a broken collar bone which curtailed his athletic career. He later noted that he was too terrified of Jones who was his coach at the time of Jones's reaction to reveal the actual cause of his injury at body surfing accident. Why was that kid? It's like a pansy sport.

No. I mean I think it was probably like you shouldn't be doing dangerous things instead of playing football. You can't be shredding NAR when we need you out here. This guy here. I hear you. Body shredding bones. Not really that fucking dangerous.

You can't take on an ocean wave. How are you going to take on the UCLA football thing? That's right. The crimson tide. How do you break your collar bone? Do you think he's body surfing with his arms behind him? I'll tell you man. If you're out of like Zoome Beach, you're out of like Zoome Beach and those things are

breaking right into the shore. It's crazy. It's shore break. It's shore break. It's shore break. It's shore break. It's a heavy pitch bra. Bra.

Yeah, bra. Bra, that's funny. That's how Marion Morrison used to talk. Yeah. It's like, dude. Dude. Dude. I was fucking shredding the fucking Malibu.

I was fucking shredding CNAR. Ocean NAR. Okay. Okay. I was totally shredding Ocean NAR and I was like, let me do one where my hands aren't here but they're like here, dude. I thought I was out of place. I was like, dude, there's a crazy fucking shore break, Marion.

I shouldn't do it, bro. Marion, you should not be in this wave, bro. Marion, this is not your wave, bro. When Marion was like, fuck that, dude, ain't no pus and then he fucking shredded it and sure enough, snapped his car, bro. Oh, damn. What am I going to do now? I can't even be the actor.

I sound too Italian-o. Everybody's going to think I'm Italian, dude. Fuck. I can't believe. Goodbye, can't be in the movies. John's will never thrive in movie pictures. Guys, today's a very special day. It's President's Day, which serves as a humbling patriotic reminder of one thing in particular,

how quickly our president's age. Wow, yeah. Look at Thomas Jefferson. He was only 53 when he was elected, but you look at any portrait, his hair is so gray, so white. Well, Thomas Jefferson wore a wig. It was like one of those people wore wigs. He chose gray.

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It also supports better gut health, better sleep, and an optimized immune system, all factors that affect your body's aging. I use AG1 every single day, and I feel significantly less old than a U.S. president. Yeah, and all I'm saying is, if I had to wear a wig, I would go with Tommy Lee and Motley Crue, not Thomas Jefferson. I want to go with an old man white wig. What about Tommy Lee Jones? To make it easy, Athletic Greens is going to give you a free one-year supply of immune-supporting

vitamin D and five free travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit atleticgreens.com slash sunny. Again, that's atleticgreens.com slash sunny to take ownership over your health and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. Guys, also on topic here, what's going on with shooting all the shit out of the sky? Right? We're just blasting shit out of the sky, left to right. Yeah.

I think, you know, we just don't want to be seen as the kind of people that will allow trash to just float around in the sky. You know? We can't be seen. Any of them aliens or all five of them. It's a little, listen, I was listening to a whole thing on the news this morning about it and they were talking about like, well, it was just, it's very, very likely that it was just, it's just, you know, apparently there's a lot of debris just floating around

in the sky and I'm like, uh, there's gravity, so no. Unless it's a fucking plastic bag. Uh-huh. What are we talking about? We could be shooting plastic bags out of the sky. Like fucking fully formed octagons that are flying around in the sky. Just, yeah, it's just fucking trash. Like, what are you talking about?

Yeah. No things fall from the sky. They don't float around in the sky. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know enough about this to dispute it. I don't know enough about the skies to dispute it. I think it's safe to say that, uh, as long as gravity still exists, things are gonna

fall. Unless they're not, but because if something's, if something's waving around in the sky and it looks like a fucking jellyfish, it's probably not a spy balloon. You know what I mean? It's just a plastic bag. You're not gonna shoot a plastic bag down with a missile. You're just not. If you're a good shot, you are.

If anything's over my skies, I shoot it down, god damn it. It's pretty good. Um, if you did, if you were the one who saw an alien spacecraft like about to land and you had the ability to either shoot it out of the sky or let it land, what would you pick? Well, I definitely, well, definitely let it land. You gotta let it land. You're responsible for the complete destruction of humanity as we know it, because it was

the evolution. If it's figured out how to fly here, it's gonna be, yeah, there's more where it came from. Yeah. It's like, yeah. But we figured out how to fly there. And we're not that smart. What if he's just here on vacation?

What if he's just here to fucking body surf? What if he just wants to body surf NAR, dude? Ocean NAR. Oh man. If I had a collarbone, I would have just broken it. Good thing I'm mostly liquid. I have a collarbone. I don't know.

Just jelly people, jelly people, you know, from the skies that want to shred ocean NAR on Earth. That may be all they are, right? It's just jelly people from another planet that want to shred NAR on our planet and we keep shooting them down. They're like, they're just like, yeah, fuck man. Could be what it is. We should write that movie.

We don't want more trash in the ocean. Jelly people. Jelly people. Jelly people. I go see that for sure. You know, interesting times for living, you know, spy balloons. So you don't want to postulate what may be up there. You guys don't want to.

I have no idea. It's really interesting. They're not letting us know. If I'm being honest, I have checked out of the news cycle for the last few days. Is that right? So the circus of the Super Bowl in combo with me just spending three solid days with my son and just having a good time. And I was like, oh, fuck it.

I'm not going to. I don't care. I don't care about any of that bullshit. And now I'm hearing people talk about it. And yeah, I don't know. It's probably space trash. Maybe it's aliens. I'll find out in a few days.

I'm getting too lazy to read the full articles, you know, I'm like seeing the headline and then I'm skimming for like any pertinent information like, come on, what do we do? It's by blue alien, give me alien, alien, alien, no alien. All right, fuck it. Yeah. Right. You're skimming the article looking for the word alien. Yeah.

You don't see it. And then he's talking about debris and I want something entertaining to happen. You know. Yeah. I saw my cat fight off a hawk. All right. I will say that. Okay.

I want to hear about that. Well, okay. So my cat is the baddest motherfucker. The cats are insane. Well, by the way, by the way, you describe your cat that way, but all outdoor cats are this way. Just so we're clear. Yeah.

Jack Bauer style. Yeah. We're talking about. That is a cat that grew up on the street. Yeah. Street cats, outdoor cats. Street cats. I've told the story before on the podcast.

We then made him an indoor cat for about two weeks and he just would sit by the window and just beg to go out and let me kill this cat. We are now denying him the life that he wants to live. That's right. Let's keep him out during the day. Let him do whatever he wants and then at night we'll bring him in because just covered in fucking blood every night when you bring him in. God damn.

He is covered in blood three out of the seven days. Well, he's white. He's white. He's like a white fur cat. He's a beautiful white. He's like he's the most graceful creature that's ever been created. A white street cat. What a find.

Yeah. Yeah. He had when he came in, he had a giant big black spot on him and we thought, okay, it's a bit a white cat with a giant spot on him. And then over the course of a week and a half, he just it was an oil slick. It was an oil stain. It was an oil stain and he just licked it off him and he's a fuzzy motherfucker. He's so cuddly and he'll just come up.

He's like a dog and so far so come up with your life. So he's drinking oil, fighting dogs. He's drinking oil. And during the day he'll sit on your lap and he'll just like lick. He's just the sweetest animal and then he's at night if he can be a savage. So one of my kids, we have outside of my bedroom, we have like a little patio outside and then we're up on the second floor and then the cat, my kids left the door a little open and you know, those cats are like liquids.

They're just like a sheet of paper. They can literally. Yes. So they just left the door, just a tiny bit open and the cat found his way out and I watched this whole thing happen and I was like, his name's Moose, I'm like Moose, come on. So I chased Moose out and now he's on the roof and then he goes up to the top of the roof where there's a peak and it's pretty high up and so he's up on the peak and I'm like, I'm not going to chase you, go do whatever you're going to do.

So I go back inside and then I feel bad, I'm like, I got to get the cat inside. So because I just got to get him inside, I'm afraid something's going to happen. So I get a can of cat food, which he'll always come back for and he just hears the sound and he comes running. So I come back out and as I come back out, I call him and I took a fork and I like hit the can, well, what happened was when I hit the can, I think I made a sound which blew up a hawk's spot. I think the hawk was like, like looking at his prey and Moose is still on the peak of

the house. Wait, he was looking at Moose? Apparently. This happened so fast. So I hit it like clank, clank and all of a sudden a hawk, well, this hawk tried to eat this cat. The hawk comes out of the tree, which is right in front. I'm watching the high, I got a front row seat.

Wow. So I hit it out of the tree, which is right near the peak of my house. The cat is on the edge of the peak, like a gargoyle looking down and the hawk comes right at him and I saw Moose go, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, like 17 jabs in a half a second. Like fucking Mayweather. And the hawk's like, fuck this. And then he goes up and he's coming back down for another dive bomb.

And I'm expecting, I'm like, Moose, expecting him to come running back in and Moose just stays there. And I'm like, holy shit, he's going to do it again. So the cat, so the hawk comes down again and Moose takes one more swipe and that hawk wanted none of it and the hawk takes off and then Moose just comes like, like running down to me. And then I like open the door and he stopped right outside the door and sat right back down outside.

And I was like, this cat, he wants more. He wants to fuck this. Bring it up. Yeah. Bring it. So he got the whole can of cat food there. I was like. Nice work, Moose.

Nice work, Moose. It was a battle. It was a battle. It was insane. I named it Marion. Yeah. Marion. The cat is cool.

I mean, too. Marion the cat. Yeah. Marion the cat. So anyway. Cat versus hawk versus hawk. Dude, you should have filmed it. It happens.

Split. Yeah. Yeah. It's so fast. You want to experience it. You've seen those reaction, the reaction videos of snakes and cats. Yes. Where they can.

There was, I saw a video recently. It's the reaction speed. It's like this close. Yes. To the cat. Yes. Like right in the cat's just like. Yep.

Wait. Wait a second. That. That snake makes a move. It's like. Yeah. It's got the, it's something about the reaction speeds of cat, of cats are, it's 0.23 milliseconds faster.

We've all seen a snake. Yes. Like do that. And it's faster than that. Cat like reflexes. Cat like reflexes. Yes. Wow.

Hawks. Hawks. Also very fast. Yeah. And they have those giant talons. And this, this thing came down. It's a peregrine Falcon. Fastest animal in the world.

Fastest animal in the world. Fastest animal in the world. Falcon's the dude. No, he's right. No, it's a peregrine Falcon is the fastest animal on earth. Yeah. Really? Yes.

Because it can dive at over 300 miles per hour. Fastest help boy. Yeah. It literally turns itself into a fucking missile and then just like launches itself. What's the hawk? What's the hawk's move there too? The prey that big. Grab it.

I think they grab it. They take it. Fly it. Take it. Drop it. Yeah. Just fucking drop it. Guess what?

If he did that. I'm tearing it bitch. I broke all my fucking legs. I'll still take you out. There's some like surprise wings that the fucking no idea. It's like pop. Like a griffin. Check this fucking out.

Now I'm coming after you. Like a griffin. Like a fucking fly. Surprise bitch. I'm a griffin. I'm a griffin.