The Amelia Project - Episode 95 - The Phoenix (800 BC)

Episode Date: November 27, 2025

"If I do not tell you this story, this night has been for nothing." The Amelia Project is a production of Imploding Fictions. This episode featured Hemi Yeroham as Kozlowski, Jordan Cobb as Jackie Williams, Erin King as Mia Fox, Benjamin Noble as Haines and Torgny G Aanderaa as Cole. It was written by Oystein Brager with story and dialogue editing by Philip Thorne, it was directed by Philip Thorne and Oystein Brager, with sound design by Eli Hamada Mcilveen and music by Fredrik Baden, graphic design by Anders Pedersen and production assistance by Maty Parzival. This episode is dedicated to Lucille Farrell. Website: https://ameliapodcast.com/  Transcripts: https://ameliapodcast.com/season-5  Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ameliapodcast Donations: https://ameliapodcast.com/support Merch: https://ameliapodcast.dashery.com/  Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/theameliaproject.bsky.social Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ameliapodcast/ Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/ameliapodcast X: https://twitter.com/amelia_podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello, audio fiction lovers, Lauren Chippin, creator of the Bright Sessions here, to tell you about my newest show, Phantom Pulse. This audio drama slash rock album tells a story of a 90s band going on their very first tour. But they won't just be playing gigs on this tour. They'll also be doing their secret side job, exercising ghosts with their music. The podcast is chocka block full of original music, found family feels, and spooky scares. It stars Erica Ishii, Nicholas Bedani, Brigh and Snow, Juliana Gutierrez-A-Rongo, and Aaron Caesar, and we're hoping to record it in the spring, but we need your help. Go to phantompulse.com right now to learn more about the show and support our Kickstarter campaign. Help us bring the show to life. That's phantompulse.com.

Get ready to rock the haunted out of the house. folks these mountains are a place of fellowship and family where the home fires forever burn and the welcome is always warm to others it's the loneliest place in the world where the woods are ever dark and nothing moves quietly in the night a place where the hungering earth grinds us all to dust one generation at a time why don't y'all come see for yourself family Deep Nerd Media presents Old Gods of Appalachia Available wherever you enjoy

fine audio entertainment This episode is dedicated to Lucille Farrell who will capsize in a gondola drown in the Venice Grand Canal and reappear as a professional flower waterer for early mornings Thank you Lucille

and thank you to all our patrons who allow us to keep telling stories. If you'd like to become a patron, we'd be ever so grateful. You can find out more at ameliapodcast.com. But for now, enjoy the show. Yes, it is time. I bid you goodbye, Mia Fox and Jackie Williams. I have enjoyed your company.

in your stories and thank you for the clothes the cheap fabrics should make for excellent tender what are you doing Jackie what is he doing is you about to do are you about to do fire walking because I think you're supposed to wait

until the flames die down if he takes one more step farewell wait no your pants are going to catch on fire what are you doing why are you walking fucking into the fire. Don't. He's crazy. No. Stop. Stop. Stop. Shit. Shit. Shit. He's on fire. He's burning. Shit. Jackie. Fuck. Fuck. Get out of there. Get out of the fire. Those cups. Is there anything in them? No. No. It's empty.

This one, too. This one's full. This one's full. Okay. Chuck it on him. Okay. Okay. Chucking it. Shit! If I get him to the ground, I can quench the fire with my jacket. Then you gotta get him out of there! Do not worry, friends! I've got to tackle him. No, no, the fire's too big.

Jackie! Stop that, stop! Let me go! I will be back! Jackie, you'll burn to death. He's burning to death. How is this fire so big? Death...

is life. No! Oh! The Amelia Project, created by Philip Thorne and Osteen-Ulsbek Braga, with music and sound direction by Frederick Barden and sound design by Eli Hamada McEleveen. The Phoenix, 800 BC. Look at that. The color of the smoke. It is sort of blue.

That means the tea is ready. In only a few moments, you will get to taste a beverage, unlike anything you have tried before. Let me dish it out. And meal cups. Here we go. Boulder's Root, the tea of life. What does it taste like? Bitter. Bitter. But the sweet kind of bitter.

I don't much care for bitter. It is sweet, but the bitter kind of sweet. Oh, so not salty, the sour kind of salty. Oh, that too. Whilst we are waiting for the tea to cool and settle, I... I think I would like to tell you another story. Another story.

I promise this is the very last one. Wasn't the one you just told us the very last one? Yeah. Now we know how you met. Where it all started? How your friendship began with you saving Maine What's His Face's Life. True, you know Arthur's origins.

But I have not told you my own. Listen, we're very, very tired. I just want to drink the potion, then go to sleep. I promise you want to hear this story. It is about a phoenix. Another phoenix? You have told us several phoenix stories. I think I'm phoenixed out for one night.

Those stories were all deviations. This one is the truth. What? You're saying this is like the origin story for all the phoenix story? The well of pain, from which all my other Phoenix stories spring. Well of pain. If I do not tell you this story, this night has been for nothing. It has absolutely not been for nothing.

We've gotten a lot of information. I mean, for me. I have to tell this story. Just one more time. I must tell it exactly the way it was. Can't it wait till morning? We'll probably be better listeners. After we've had some sleep, you can tell it over breakfast.

Do we have breakfast? I don't know. There may be some gummy bears in the car. I want to tell it now! Oh, okay. I am sorry. It is the story about Behram. Behram?

Your partner? Exactly. Okay. Tell us then. Right. I do not know where to start. You were born in the ancient city of Tyre and Phoenician. You were a dire son, right?

An apprentice to your uncle and father. You looked after the family phoenix. We had no phoenix. The rest is correct. I grew up in tire, but this story is about when I was a young man, when love took me on a a journey that spanned every continent, every ocean, crossing mountain ranges and vast plains, finally bringing me here. Here? Like, here, here, you mean...

Yes, this very field. Actually, I really want to hear this story. Sweet, you didn't have a phoenix? No. We bought the color from the Aslan's, but because Before I tell you about them, I must tell you about me. You see, I had a passion. Dying fabrics is a chemical process, and sometimes a chemical process will surprise you. Take urine, for example, when leaving the body it is seethru or yellow, but when you dye clothes

with it, they will be blue. Ew, people actually do that? Well, this awakened in me a great curiosity. How do the substances of the natural world really work? What are their secret properties? I started experimenting and researching all manner of things. Plants, herbs, rocks, salts. Today, we would call what I was doing, physics, chemistry, biology.

At the time, these fields of study were one and the same. They were known under one name. Medicine. Magic. Oh. My father encouraged my studies. As long as I upheld my duties, and one of my duties from when I was a very young boy

was to run over to Mr. Aslan's house with a bag of gold and return with... Feathers? A bag of feathers. Mr. Aslan. was a phoenix keeper and we needed the feathers for our dyes. I loved going over to Mr. Aslan's house because then I got to see my best friend, Mr. Aslan's son. Behram. Behram. We were friends for years. Whenever I came over, first Mr. Aslan would serve tea, then he would let Behrem and I

play in the courtyard whilst he counted the gold and prepared the feathers. Behrem and I would run around the yard, frightening the chickens, playing at being pirate boarding merchant ships. As we grew older, our interest would turn to board games. Behrem would get so annoyed when I bit him at Mancala, but playing Pataya, he always had the upper hand. We loved each other's company, and when the time came for me to return home with the feathers, Well, I never wanted to leave. Then the day came when I turned 15, and I had to go sailing with my uncle.

It was a rite of passage for any Dyer's apprentice, to join a merchant ship, selling the fabrics, meeting our customers all over the Mediterranean, kings and queens, princesses and princes. So your uncle didn't leave the family in shame, like in the other story? Oh, he did not. As the younger brother, it was responsible for selling our goods, whilst my father, as the older brother, produced the fabrics. My uncle's ship would be travelling for the better part of a year, and I was scared of being lonely.

As the youngest aboard, I had little in common with the old sailors. So, I asked if perhaps my uncle would need one more deckhand. and he said yes That was our first journey together Me and Berram He let Berram join That's sweet We saw the world

Or so we thought Little did we know that later we would travel much much further But on this trip The Mediterranean felt like the whole universe We saw chariot races in Athens and heard Ziriyah play the lute in the Emirate of Cordoba. We sailed under the colossus of roads and set up our stall next to the Temple of Artemis. Wow, that sounds incredible. One evening in Byzantium, Behram and I had been given shore leave. The ship would only

heave anchor at sunrise, so we had plenty of time. We had bought Sweet Tea and walked to the river back. We sat there looking out at the ships, sailing the Bosphorus, discussing poetry and philosophy. You mentioned this before. In the first story about you and Bécham, the two of you by the Bosphorus. Isn't the Bosphorus straight in Istanbul? Istanbul used to be called Byzantium. I thought Istanbul used to be called Constantinople. That was before Constantine the Great re-founded the city. Right. Go back to the story. Behram and I were so caught up. in our discussions, that evening became night. We looked at the stars, shared secrets, completely forgetting about time. Suddenly, I noticed the sun is about to rise. I panic. We only have a few

minutes to make our way back to the ship. If we are late, my uncle will be furious. He will punish us, or maybe they will leave without us. We get up and run as fast as we can, But just as we get to the docks, Behram grabs me and pulls me behind a boathouse. What? Why? Behram, I say, what are you doing? We only have a minute or my uncle will... And he kisses me. Behram kisses me.

And I kiss him back, of course. And we stop worrying about my uncle and just... Kiss behind the boathouse. That's really romantic. Did you get left behind? My uncle waited for us. It was no big deal. I had panicked for nothing.

But maybe, if I had not panicked, Behram would not have kissed me, who knows? It is a really sweet story, but so far we haven't met a single phoenix, just some feathers. Easy, Jackie Williams. We will get to the phoenix. soon enough. In fact, now it is time to skip forward a few years. Behram and I are young men. We are going steady and we have moved in together. Openly? I mean, you didn't get in trouble for being gay? Oh, please. This was before the rise of the Abrahamic religions. Even Judaism was in its infancy. Times were different in so many ways, for better and for worse. Huh.

One day, Mr. Aslan passed away, and on this day, Behram learned, no. What is it? I need to tell the story in another order. I, uh, Telling this story is hard for you. I have only ever told it once. Only once? Yes. Only once the way it really happened. You mean without embellishing? And inventing and...

Lying? Yes. But I want to tell it now. To you. I... I feel very privileged. Yes. Yes.

we do I will try I will try I had a wonderful but parallel to my happiness runs a darker story the story of my country Phoenicia

Phoenicia was a Thalasocratic civilization Whoa, whoa, blah, blah. Athalo-Socratic civilization. Was that a penis state? He said phala-socratic. Th. Oh. Phoenicia was a maritime state.

The country consisted of port towns around the Mediterranean. We controlled trade and transport across southern Europe, northern Africa, and the Middle East. We were an empire at sea. Oh, this may. made us desirable for economic reasons and military. The Assyrians, the Babylonians, the Persians, the Macedonians, everyone wanted to control the Phoenician port towns. There is hardly a day in the history of Phoenicia when we were not at war.

And war takes its toll, not only on a country's population and on its soldiers, but also and its natural resources. But if you were a sea country, what natural resources did you have? Oh, fish. No. Birds. Birds?

Specifically. Phoenixes, finally. Yes. Phoenicians were the only people who knew the sacred art of keeping phoenixes. How to sustain their lifespan. How to make sure they regenerate.

But after centuries of one army after another looting and plundering, the phoenix population had depleted. Oh, right, I remember because they treated the phoenix as badly and they burned too often. That is right. So, on the same day that Behram lost his father, he also learned that he was now the keeper of the very last phoenix in the world. Oh, oh shit. Oh, shit, indeed. The last phoenix, that's where you got that from. It didn't belong to a Chinese emperor. No, and it did not pretend to be a chicken either.

It belonged to Behrum. At the time, Phoenicia was under attack by... The Assyrians, I think. We knew that as soon as they found out where the last phoenix was, they would come to take her. She was the pride of the household. A magnificent bird, dignified and stubborn, but also kind. Kind?

When we were children and our games of being pirates became too wild, sometimes Behram or I would fall and graze our knee. But then, Panacea would come flying. Panacea? That was her name. She would stand next to us, tilt her head, and cry on our wound, and the wound would heal. Wow. She understood you were in pain.

Ah, phoenixes are wiser than any other bird. We all loved Panacea, her grace and her antics, and we wanted to save her from the clutches of the Assyrians. If she ended up with them, she would surely die. So, we fled. Behram took his sacred duty very seriously. He had sworn to protect the family Phoenix no matter what, and I would follow him anywhere.

Of course. And thus began our second journey, a much, much longer journey than our gamble around the Mediterranean. To escape the Assyrians, Behram and I went as far as we possibly could, all the way to the territories of Western Zoo. Western Zoo. Huh. We disguised ourselves as farmers and joined the local village, working the rice fields

a day, smoking herbs with the elders in the evenings, and tending to Panacea at night. But soon we learned that our secret had been discovered. King Yu of Zoo had got wind of what was living in our tent, so we had to flee again. This time we went north. We lived with the Dolgan people by the Lena River, herding reindeer on the tundra. The climate was harsh, cold and windy. But in summer, the fields were full of the most beautiful wildflowers. But yet again our precious possession was discovered.

So we moved again. This time we went south to the African savannah. Here we were all alone. Our only neighbors were elephants and lions. For a brief moment we felt safe. Among lions? Little did we know that the Bantu people were expanding their territories. Soon there were people on the savannah and prying eyes.

yet again. So, we left. Although we got better at hiding Panacea, sooner or later we would always be discovered. It seemed impossible to keep Panacea's existence secret for long. So we decided the best thing to do was to keep traveling. Never stay for too long in one place. For many years, Behram, Panacea and I were constantly on the move. We travelled over mountain tops and across vast plains, crossed rivers and sailed oceans, traversed deserts and ploughed through the thickest of rainforests. Every place we went, we would adopt new disguises. As soon as we fear that someone had found out who we really were and that we were hiding

a phoenix, we would move again and once more change our appearance. This was when I first acquired my proficiency in prosthetics. Wigs, facial hair, costumes, masks. Even with the very basic techniques of the time, I discovered ways of changing our looks until we were unrecognizable. We were never the same two men for very long. You saw the world from behind a hundred different faces. Young man, an old man, a criminal, a warden.

A treasure keeper. A war hero. Always on the run. Always a refugee. Always moving. Never settling. It was hard. I cannot deny that.

But traveling also had its benefits. Do you remember what my field of study was? Uh, prosthetics. Before that? Uh, uh, chemistry, physics. Magic. The ancient alchemies. Everywhere we went.

went, I studied the local knowledge. Religion, myths, science. I sought out witches and medicine men, storytellers and historians, experimenters and tradition keepers. I wanted to know every rock, every herb, every substance on earth. I acquired unfathomable knowledge unlike anyone else alive. But there was one mystery that eluded me, and I became obsessed with unlocking its secret. The mystery of the phoenix. How could it live for centuries? How did it acquire its powers of healing? Why was its life force so strong, so unbreakable that it could defeat certain death? And was there anything in nature that could give a human the same powers. Like a powerful plant.

Or a root. Maybe phoenixes have to eat boulder's root to gain their powers. They'd have to fly all the way to Scotland. Birds migrate. Can we drink the tea yet? Soon. Living on the road, I saw so many ways of existing. Different cultures, languages, customs.

I loved it. always tasting, smelling, learning something new. But I soon realized that the world was too big, and my life too short. Humans have such a limited window of time on Earth. It's like going to Disney World, isn't it? Disney World. There's no way you can do all the attractions in one day. You have to accept that you'll only ever experience a fraction of what life has to offer

And that sucks. Unless? Unless. Unless. Unless. You buy a multi-day pass. Ha! So, so you wanted to extend your lifespan.

I went to Behram and I said, you and I do not have children. Who shall look after Panacea when we die? Should we not look for a way to live on? Well, he must have been excited by that, getting to spend more time with you and look after Panacea. He was not. No?

Behram and I had always discussed philosophy. ethics. We loved discussing, but we rarely agreed. That was what made the discussion so exciting. But when he disagreed with me on this, it annoyed me. How could he not see that this was the only way? What was his argument? He said, Itobal, do not forget there is a system to nature. A system is holy. Whoever breaks the God-given rule, commits hubris. We are men and we should never attempt to be gods. He had a point. He did not. To this day I disagree. If gods made this earth and all the things on it,

they made it for us to explore and... Exploit? Utilize. We make penicillin out of mold. We use nitrogen to fertilize plants and feed millions. The world is full. of discoveries waiting to be made. Discoveries that will make life better, richer, more creative, and sustainable. That is also a point.

All right. You do not live with a phoenix without being enthralled by its power. That is why phoenixes were only kept by certain chosen families. Passed down from generation to generation. generation. These families were respected and treasured, but also feared. They were more revered than priests, more shunned than lepers. They were graced with the honor and cursed with the burden of being

Phoenix keepers. And suddenly, I was one of them. Every day I looked into Panacea's eyes. when feeding her, giving her water. The phoenix has eyes unlike any other creature. Galaxies swirl in those eyes. Behram warned me. He tried to teach me the ancient ways, but I learned like a student and not like an air. Do you see,

I was not a phoenix keeper son I was a dire son the responsibility instilled in Behram from the moment he was born I could never feel day by day week by week my obsession grew the phoenix has the power of life and death

it is the holy grail the philosopher's stone And then, one day, it was no longer curiosity. It was lost. I did no longer want to know the phoenix. I wanted to become one. The tea is done. Oh, right. Yes, let's...

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Sherifay. I'm... I'm that's goodlythold. Hmm. It's... Do you like it? It's...

It's sort of... Umami. But the acidic kind of umami? You think? I think it's more grassy. But... the meaty kind of grassy. So?

I mean, it's not bad. No, it's not bad. Hmm. I did not realize how thirsty I was. Right? Do not drink it all at once. Remember to savor it. Yeah.

It's not every day we drink a magic potion. We should commit this moment to memory. Ah. So how long are we going to live now that we've drunk this? I do not know. Oh, come on. I mean like an estimate. I do not know. I cannot predict the future. Ah, it is not healthy to know when you shall die.

Don't worry about your lifespan, Mia. Think about how we'll be received when we return. True. When we were assigned the Amelia Project case, no one at the CIA expected this. Well, shall I continue? Sure. One day I worked it out. Worked what out?

How to gain the powers of the phoenix? Oh, the powers will soon have. All through our travels, I had collected recipes and rituals, incantations, and ancient algorithms. But although nearly every culture on the planet entertains the idea of eternal life, No one could tell me how to go about achieving it. But then, one day, I found the final piece of the puzzle, hidden in a place I did not expect. Where?

With the Tohunga Tamoko. Uh, who were they? The Tohunga Tamoko are the sacred tattooists of the Maori tribes in New Zealand. A bunch of tattoo artists knew the secrets to eternal life? Was that when you started tattooing yourself? On our travels I had admired body art from many cultures, but so far I had refrained from marking my own body, for fear of making myself recognisable. Adding a beard is of little help if you can be recognized from the ink under your skin. But even if I had been fascinated by tattoos and other body modification, it was only when I met the Maori people that I realized that some tattoos hold power.

What do you mean? Some tattoos perform functions. They imbue the bearer with strength or luck or wisdom. Tattoos have magic properties? I hate to disappoint you, Mia, folks, but the Chinese symbol on your ankle has no magic power. You notice that? It's a bit embarrassing.

You know, I was young. I thought it would be cool to get love written in Chinese. It says feces. Oh. Oh, Mia. Okay, you know, whatever. So, some tattoos. Tell us what happened in New Zealand.

New Zealand? Nothing. I did not yet understand the implications of what I had learned. I did not have my realization until we were in the land of the Celts. Keltz? Wait, that's here. From other travelers, I had heard talk of a field where special plants grow. Plants with properties with which I wanted to experiment.

Like roots, for example? Finally, now we're coming here. We sailed all the way around the globe and landed on that shore right there in this very field. Right now, we are sitting exactly where Behram and I built our hearts. We were completely isolated here. The closest settlement was all the way south in Corimokloch. No one lived as far north as this. Up here it was only Behrem, Panacea and me.

Plus, the plants and the herbs and the lapping waves. Normally, we did not let Panacea walk about outside. But here, we felt safe to let her fly, stretch her wings, and it was safe. But Panacea was out of practice. So, on one of her first days here, she landed badly and scratched her wing on some rocks. She started bleeding. Was she very hurt? hurt? Well, I mean, she's a phoenix. Couldn't she just cry on her wound and heal it?

She could. A little wound is no big deal for a phoenix. But seeing her plead, her blood was such a deep, dark color, so dark it was hardly red anymore. Not at all the color you would expect. I had never seen phoenix blood before but there it was dripping onto the rocks black as ink black as ink in that moment my obsession burst into flame it was like the fire of the phoenix already burned in my chest it was crystal clear i knew how i could gain the phoenix's powers how its control of life and death could be mine, could be me. How? I could not know if the procedure would work. No one had ever attempted this before, but I believed it had to, only... Yes. No gain comes without loss.

Is that supposed to mean? There is no yin without yang. Uh-huh, meaning... You understand. I don't want to think it, so... Yeah, you're going to have to say it. In the process of transferring the phoenix's powers to myself... Panacea...

would have to die. Oh, fuck. My mind was set. I could not stop, not now. Not when I had uncovered the greatest secret in the universe. I had to see if it would work. So, late one night,

after Behram had fallen asleep, I sneaked out. He was lying over there. It was a clear night. A starry sky. A huge full moon. I carried Panacea down to the shore and started the ritual. You see this tattoo right here?

Mm-hmm, the phoenix on your forehead. That was my very first tattoo. It is not made with regular ink, you see. It is made with phoenix blood. You... You killed Panacea. Wouldn't she just come back the next morning? Not if I...

not when I she would not because I drained her oh Kuzlowski I put my hands around Panacea's neck and her eyes filled with terror

I averted my gaze clenched my teeth and tightened my grip Panacea let out a feeble wail She was trying to sing, you see, but my hands were crushing her windpipe, and then she was silent, limp, lifeless. I took out my knife, inserted it under the keel bone, and cut. Her blood flowed freely, dark and thick into my copped hands. I transferred it to my flask, distilled it, and used. it, all of it, to carve her likeness onto my face.

The ritual I had devised was very simple. The next thing I had to do was step into the fire. What did you mean by the By step into the fire My plan was to come running up to the hut the next morning Sheikh Behram, crying and wailing, shouting, panacea, panacea, he would wake, run after me to her cage where I had placed a heap of ashes. Faking her death like you did in the story with the Chinese prince.

Only in reality you were covering up her murder. The ashes would not stir, would not reform, and Bairm and I would cry together. We would hold each other as close as we could, lamenting. the bird who had inexplicably burned for the last time. I imagined how morning together would bring us closer to each other than ever before. But it didn't? What happened? I never got that far. I had made our funeral pyre. Panacea was burning for the last time. The ritual was drawing to a close.

Then I see Behadam is walking towards me. He has woken up. He looks stunned. The bird's flaming ashes are spiraling around me. I am standing in a whirlwind, vibrating with the forces of the universe, but From inside the fire, I can see Behram crying. You are in the fire? I had to burn.

Like the bird. With the bird. As I burn for the first time, I watched Behram turn his back on me. By the time the sun rose again, and I rose from the end. ashes for the first time Behram was gone. You burned and came back?

Okay, but let's focus on the important thing. Berem left you. And I followed. Yeah, but you burned like a phoenix? It's poetic license. I don't think it is poetic license. Okay, it's a metaphor. Just let him tell the story. This is heartbreaking.

So, I mean, you went looking for him. I would follow him anywhere. And did you find him? After three days searching moors and forests, I found him on the shores of a log. Just sitting there, completely still, staring into the distance. I ran towards him, flung my arms around him,

but he did not return the embrace, did not move at all. Look at me, Behram, look at me. I implored, and he turned and looked at me. His eyes filled with hatred. That is when I realized that no apology would ever be enough. No explanation I could think of would ever console him. There was no way of justifying my betrayal. I had killed the very lost Phoenix, put an end to Behram's sacred duty, erased the meaning of his life. I... I'm sorry it ended like that. He would never forgive me. I knew that. But I could not live without him.

An impossible situation Unless Yeah I made that night Disappear What? That night I betrayed his trust The night I murdered Panacea

You're saying you wanted to turn back time There was another way to wipe the slate clean And what is that? A drug. What? I returned to our field and dug and chopped and grated and boiled. I distilled and distilled and distilled again, making a concoction so strong, so powerful. Then I went out again to look for Behram.

Again, I found him, but this time I did not try to make him understand. and I just offered him a drink. He had not drunk or eaten for a week. His skin was cracked and gray, his breathing shallow. Reluctantly, he accepted the cup, but when I sat next to him, he turned away. I understood. I walked back towards the forest,

and only then did he live. the cup. He drank, and I waited. So this concoction, what did it do? I spent the afternoon in the forest, gathering nuts and berries, and when the sun began to set, I returned to Behram with my feast. And, I mean, you rejected you shortly, but... Ah, on the contrary, he was on the verge of starvation. But you said... He was pleased to see me. Pleased, but also, confused.

Confused, why? Who are you? He inquired. What? I asked him questions. mentioned things that had happened, things that had not. He had forgotten about our travels, our disguises. Forgotten about the savannah, the tundra, the rice fields. He had forgotten our escape from the Assyrians.

Forgotten about Zyrib and the Colossus of Rose and our first kiss behind the boathouse. After a while, I asked him about his childhood and it was like he had never had one. No Mancala or Pataya, no playing pirates or scaring the chickens in the courtyard. No Mr. Aslan serving tea to his young friend. No, Ithobah.

Wow. So, um, well, did he fall in love? with you again? He looked at me and smiled. The way you smile at a stranger, you know. For a time, we wandered together. I cared for him. I taught him everything he needed to know to survive, and he was grateful to me.

So, I mean, you got what you wanted. Maybe I got what I deserved. I mean, you murdered the last phoenix and erased your lover's memory. You kind of deserved to be punished. Exactly. But it sounds like you in the new bathroom got on just fine. Fine. Do you know how painful that was?

What? We had scaled mountains. together, made love in the snow, outsmarted the Emergians and the Sigartians, taught each other Sanskrit, told each other's stories, so many stories. So you had to rebuild your relationship, but... But now, day after day, after day, just that same pleasant, beautiful, empty smile. it was fine we built a routine fish day chicken day

nuts and berries day hawk day all very pleasant but not what life with behram had been about I mean give the poor guy a break you just woke up without any memories and you just want to go straight back to chasing lions in the savannah I would have settled for a life of quiet routine with the new Behram.

But I could not get used to the way he looked at me. It broke my heart. How did he look at you? The way you look at a friend. And that's a bad thing? When he used to look at me, his eyes filled with fire, curiosity, intensity, lust. Oh, I see.

Even when he looked at me by the lock, his eyes burning with hatred I preferred that at least that meant something he was no longer in love with you was he no

so I made sure there were enough chickens plugged and berries picked and paid Behram farewell you accepted you could no longer find your way back to what you had I think that was wise

You have learned by now that I do not give up Oh? I thought Perhaps I need to be a new person If Behram cannot fall in love with me the way I am now Then I must become someone new What, you put on a disguise? I used prosthetics only to cover up the phoenix tattoo

But no A fake beard may feel fool the Assyrians, but not a lover. But if the beard was real, if my jawline was sharper, my eyebrows neater, my face more symmetrical. For the first time, I tried my hand at surgery. Operating on yourself? Didn't that hurt? I was willing to take the pain.

My worry was the scars. Would they be disgusting to bed? But I need not have worried. There were no scars. There were no... It was the ritual. I had become a panacea. Every cut I made healed like nothing had happened.

I discovered I could reshape my body any way I wanted. Jeez! That explains the crocodile skin. Why your body doesn't reject it? And the fingerprints? As soon as my face had healed, I sought out Behram again. He welcomed this new stranger.

Gave me shelter, treated me amicably, but still. There was no passion. I tried over and over and over. Seeing the world from behind different faces. Again. For how many moons I cannot remember. I did not want to lose Behram. Of course.

You were soulmates. Not anymore. Well, I mean, technically you were still the same two people, so... Was he the same person? Without all the experiences that had shaped the Behram I knew and loved? And was I the same person, now that I had Phoenix blood on my hands, in my veins? I had erased him and I had erased myself. Then one day, when I arrived at the hut with yet another new identity and knocked on the door,

another man opened. Another man. Behram had finally fallen in love but not with me you lost him you gained immortality yeah but you lost the love of your life

I had made a mistake a mistake I could never correct I had acted out of greed an egotism and the gods had punished me on that day i swore to dedicate my life to helping others i thought perhaps if i filled my life with good deeds and i knew i would live for a very long time then perhaps just perhaps i could one day make up for what i had done wow yeah Wow.

Which is why I apologize for what I have just done. What do you mean? I actually thought it was very moving. I apologize for my actions here tonight. Sorry? I suppose there was an element of egotism to it. Wait. What?

What are you talking about? Your tea. What about the tea? about the tea. Shit. Mia, I'm so caught up in the story I didn't... What? What is going with him?

Patience! It doesn't come from the root? It doesn't? No. He is patience. Oh. Oh. The memory erasure thing.

What was it made from? I am afraid. Do you know the answer to that question, Jackie Williams? Boulder's root. The tea? Like I said, I am profusely. for what I have just done to. Fuck!

What? I... I am afraid... What is... It is too late. Oh my god, you fucking... Are we gonna lose our memories? Are we gonna know...

Are we gonna know who we are? Will I know who I am? We did not distill the tea. We did not distill the tea, so... It is not so strong. Is it? Is it? The first you will forget this evening.

Then the last week, then the last month, then... No, no, no, no. But I promise, I have taken your stories, and I will treasure them. No, no. Mia, don't drink the tea. What are you talking about? We already drank the tea, Jackie. What?

Shit, my cup is starting. Empty. Oh, my God, you're forgetting things already. Forgetting. What? I must thank you, though. Oh, thank us, thank us for what? Bringing me here, it means a lot to me.

Does it? This field is a place of magic. I always feel especially refreshed when I regenerate here, in the place where I burned for the very first time. What do you mean regenerate? Mia, don't forget. What do you mean by burns? Stay focused.

He just told us he is a phoenix. Phoenix, like from, like from Arizona? No. I think they call them Phoenicians. Every so often, I must renew myself. And it just so happens, it is today. What? Yes.

It is time. I bid you goodbye, Mia Fox and Jackie Williams. I have enjoyed your company and your stories, and thank you for the clothes. The cheap fabrics should make for excellent tender. What are you doing? Jackie, what is he doing? Are you about to do... Are you about to do fire walking?

Because I don't... I think you're supposed to wait until the flames died out. I don't... If he takes one more step... Farewell. Wait, no, your pants are going to catch on fire. What are you doing? Why are you walking into the fire?

He's crazy. No. Stop! Stop! Stop! Fuck! Shit! Shit!

He's on fire! He's burning! Shit, Jackie! Fuck! Fuck, get out of there! Get out of the fire! Those cups! Is there anything in them?

No, no, it's empty. This one too. This one's full. Okay, chuck it on him! Okay, chucking it. Shit! If I get him to the ground, I can quench the fire with my jacket. Then you gotta get him.

out of there. Do not worry, friends! I've got to tackle him. Get... No, no, the fire's too big. Jackie! Stop that, stop! Stop!

Let me go! I will be back! Ah! Jackie, you'll burn to death. He's burning to death. Ow, is this fire's open. Death is life! Ah!

Oh, Jackie's right. What? We can put out the fire. Take off your jacket. It's never going to work. It will. Come on. Now!

Oh, shit! It's going to work. Come on. Shit! The trousers on fire! It doesn't work. Abort! Abort! My trousers! Come on! Come on!

Oh! It's out. It's out. He's still burning! Oh, the sea. What? Yes. There's water. can still save him. Come on.

Boy, you've got nothing to carry it in. Who the fuck are they? Grab them. What that? No! You are under arrest. Get your knee off of... Let us go.

You have the right to shut up, you terrorist piece of scum. Terrorists? What are you? Hold, still. Oh, no! He's burning. Who's burning? What are you talking? The surgeon. He's dying.

Get down. Go of me. Haynes. Haynes. It's too late. What's too late? He's dead. Oh, shit.

He's dead for real. A whole man burned to cinders in less than what a minute. How's that even possible? Who knows what substances he filled his body with? It was probably a walking wick. Okay, you two shut up and, like, stop, stop talking in code. Always end up with the weirdos. Yeah, for real.

We're not the ones who drank a madman's potion and lost our memory. What? Oh, okay, just shut up. Haines. Look. Look! Okay, so what should we do with these guys, Jackie? I guess we bring them back to...

What? To... Back to the base? The embers? Yeah. The ashes. They're forming. What do you mean they're forming?

I can't see. I mean... Forming. She's got me in her headlock. Let go. Don't move. What are we? Georgian City.

Well, they're the... They're the two... Oh, everything's like foggiest. What? It's probably the smoke, but... I think drugs, maybe? I think like the drug guys... Terrorism?

They're growing. It doesn't... It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. They're bad guys. They're crying. It's... It's him. We'll figure out what to...

Churching with later. It's another magic trick. Hey, hey, Mia, Jackie, he's coming back. The surgeon. How do you know our names? Go on, never mind. Just look behind you. Look behind us.

How stupid do you think we are? He is rising from the ashes. Okay. You're right, Mia? These nutballs belong behind bars, criminal or not. Yeah, right? But he is behind you. Okay.

Indeed, I am. What? Where did you come from? Okay, now who are you? I am sorry to interrupt two officers of the law. In the middle of apprehending two criminals. I shall be on my way. Uh, uh, why, why are you naked? Oh, that.

Of course. I am going to the new decision. nudist beach for a morning swim. Good day to you. You too. No, don't let him. Have a good one. You can see that tattoo on his forehead? Yeah. That was something else.

Oh my God. That was the surgeon. You're investigating the immediate project. Hello. Do you not remember anything? Haynes, it's pointless. Mia, have you? Got any handcuffs?

Yeah, yeah, of course I have the handcuts. Never mind. You have cable ties. Just get him. to the car. Oh, no. Listen, will you please let us go?

We are special agents, Henry Cole, and Christopher Haynes of MI5. Wait, your agents? Yes. Oh, oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't realize. Thank you.

Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, they're agents. I thought they were criminals. Can I see your badge? Oh, yeah, sure. Oh, well, in that case, I'm really sorry. Oh, cheers. Come on, Hayt. Let's follow him. Yeah. Are you guys coming with us?

The actual criminal is walking away. Give off. They can't even tell their fingers from their toes right now. Now. Come on. Come on. Sure, sure, sure. Which way did he go? This way, come on.

Where are they going? God, but it is not happening. Bye. first the credits. The Amelia Project is a production of imploding fictions. This episode featured Hemi Yiroham as Kozlowski, Jordan Cobb as Jackie Williams, Aaron King as Mia Fox, Benjamin Noble as Haynes and Togny G. Ondero as Cole. It was written by Einstein Braga with story and dialogue editing by Philip Thorne. It was directed by Philip Thorne and Einstein Braga with sound design by Eli Hamada McEleveen and Music by Frederick Barden Graphic Design by Andash Pedersen

and Production Assistance by Marti Patsyval. If you're hearing this, it means you're listening on the public feed. The episode came out a month ago without ads on Patreon. The next two episodes will come out publicly in the new year, but on Patreon, the next one will come out in the coming week. So, if you want to support our work, get early and ad-free access, and if you want to browse our extensive library of audio and video bonus content, go to ameliapodcast.com today and sign up as a patron from just $5.

Thank you to everyone who is supporting the show, and a shout-out to our super patrons. At the time of recording, that's Michaela Sullivan, Celeste Joe's Heat 312, Albina, St. Amelie and Alison, Stephanie Weidnella, Rafael, Eduardo, Vivas Verastaki, Alison Thro, Patricia Bourne, Wagner, Bryce, McCliff, Heisinger, Michael West, Tim McBacken, Lauren Byers, Curtney Mays, Renson, Boo, Astra Kim, Olivia Dodson, Philip Hansen, Michael David Smith, Elgy, Ryan Burnett, Timmer, Timmer, Missy, Mystic Sybil, Tiffany Duffie, Jason Woodes, Ryan Omara, Christine Bayuga, Stefan Hartinger, Lucille Farrell, Anonymous, Blythwarnaby, Iris, Jade Pickering, Daniel and Nissen Matthew, with two T's, the first tee, is silent, Kelsey Page, Silas X, Isabella, Arzino, G, the Blue Sky, Canal Crypted, Ethan Cobb, Heldon, Incart, Artea Maccada, Ente, the Slim Reaper, Maxie

J. Goodall, Captain Cashay, and Natali Aurora. And now, the epilogue. I can't... I can't for the life of me remember. how we got here me neither where even are we? Oh look the sun's coming up

that's beautiful Yeah, wow. The sky is all red, lights. It's like fire. Feathers. Like feathers? Huh.

I'm sorry, but... I seem to have forgotten your name. The Fable and Falling Network, where fiction producers flourish. Hello, and thanks for calling the arena. If you know your party's extension, you can dial it at any time. If your psychiatrist has gone missing, press three. Press three. That sounds ill-advised.

Life is about choices, man. You and I both suffer from a very rare form of mental illness, right? Yep, yep, that's us. I'm just saying, we're probably not the best private investigators, since we don't know what's real. The waitress at the Chinese restaurant. She told me that I needed to complete three trials to find Sadler. Okay, but how long have you been out of your meds?

Three. files. The arena, the old factory, the inventor's basement. The inventor's basement. Exactly. Mama, I met someone today. You're not going to believe this. Half spider, half human. You all have this disorder. We call it the imperfection. Okay, so we just got off the train at a stop called East River between East Broadway and York Street, which I'm pretty sure doesn't exist. We are not a cop show, Charlie. I know that, but we're friends, and I need my friends. How sure are you that these things are actually happening in real life? It seems like reality can be a little slippery. Charlie! Charlie! They're on my face!

Amber! Stop! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! These fucking spiders, they are everyone! The imperfection, an audio drama in nine parts, produced by Wolf at the Door Studios. Out now. For more information, please visit WLFDR.com. Thank you.