The Amelia Project - Episode 96 - Dear Dawn Many Deaths (Part 1)

Episode Date: January 1, 2026

“It's the morning. The birds are out. The gravediggers have started work.” Featuring Alan Burgon and Julia C. Thorne. Written by Philip Thorne with story editing by Oystein Ulsberg Brager, directed by Philip Thorne and Oystein Ulsberg Brager, with sound design by Alexander Danner, music by Fredrik Baden, graphic design by Anders Pedersen and production assistance by Maty Parzival. Website: https://ameliapodcast.com/  Transcripts: https://ameliapodcast.com/season-5  Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ameliapodcast Donations: https://ameliapodcast.com/support Merch: https://ameliapodcast.dashery.com/  Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/theameliaproject.bsky.social Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ameliapodcast/ Tumblr: https://www.tumblr.com/ameliapodcast X: https://twitter.com/amelia_podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode is dedicated to Lydia Ames, who will fall off Whitby Pier and come back as a coffin maker on the Isle of Lewis. Thank you to Lydia and thank you to all our patrons who keep this show alive. If you'd like to become part of our Patreon community, get early ad-free access to episodes and bonus content, as well as supporting our team. Go to ameliapodcast.com for more info. But for now, enjoy the episode. Alvina. What is... You were a druid. A druid!

An actual druid. Yes, okay, it's really not that funny. It is a druid. And you toppled, Stonehenge. Yes, well, it was a very long time ago. Yes, 3,000 years ago Give or take You were a druid

3,000 years ago And you toppled stone hen Look, can we please let bygones Be bygones A druid An actual cloak and stuff Flipping, get a fixed druid Or did you have a beard

I bet you had a beard A really, really long flowy white beard How long was your beard Alvina Come on, tell me about your beard Being a druid was a very solemn and sacred thing back then. I know.

And then you go and topples down. Yes, yes. I think we've got that now. Ah, a clumsy druid. Do not make me regret telling you that story. Sorry. I'm going to be able to be. You've stopped making fun of me.

I wasn't making fun of you. No? Not at all. It's just... Yes? You're such a strange man. In a good way. In a good way. Hmm.

The sun is rising. Hmm? Oh, yes, so it is. We've been here for almost ten hours. What are you thinking? Remember following the cat here? You're all right, Shiba. Walking down, Ruele Peak. Ruele Pika.

Seems more than ten hours ago, doesn't it? Oh, I'm sorry. on a bit. No. I could sit here for another ten hours. More. Really? You must be getting very hungry. We finished the scorns ages ago. I had the last one when you were telling the punk story. Oh, so you haven't eaten since 1979. What's it like? What's what like? Oh, um, a constant string of goodbyes. You mean...

Duach. The druid? Hmm? The druid? It's not funny. Jovianus and Silvanus? Julius and Salvidius. Wait, were those menelbies? No, those were the camels. Those were the camels. They did us proud, numerous occasions.

Shame about the spitting. Eguido and Santino. Solomon. Oh, that's breath. Oh, I can still smell it in the back of my nose. Barker. Wait, Barker? Who was he again? The Bible. Oh, of course. Yes. Our printer.

Oh, and of course, then, Johani and Serafino, who tore the printing press apart and rebuilt it. Pocalan, strange fellow. Johannes and Salvatore, Jack Boyd. Ah, Luigi. You know, he reminded me very much of Luke Dougal. Oh, and Buttercup, of course. Oh, buttercup, bless. Yes. Hmm, Carl Granton. Oh, Joe and Salinger. And Joe, and Joe, and Sallinger, for that matter. And the Mies. I really missed the Mies. And Jan and Olaf, of course. Oh, yes. The ballet boys in the submarine.

Indeed. And Tiddly Wings. And Martha. Hmm. Yes. Lots of goodbyes. Huh. Somehow I thought... I don't know.

Yes? It's just... Your accomplices were never really a big part of your story. Well, I mean, I've had so many teams over the years. The focus always seem to be on you and Kozlovsky. Well, yes. I mean, Kozlovsky is the only constant. The others come and go. It's hard to keep track sometimes, but I do miss them.

They were an important part of the Brotherhood, and we couldn't have done it on our own. You know that better than anyone, Alvina. I... Wait. What? Is this a thank you for the case files? Well, case files is taking things a bit far, don't you think? I mean, we never did case files before, but...

Oh, but just imagine all your stories neatly indexed and colour-coded with pretty pastel colours and sticky tabs. Yes, but there were no sticky tabs in 700 BC. Oh, yeah. Druids never keep records. That's right. They're making little scratches on the stones. Well, all we had was...

Sharp tools. Druid. Climsy chaotic, druid. You know, I thrive on a certain degree of chaos, as does it, Obar. But I do appreciate that we rely on people with a... Yes. A different approach. Uh-huh.

Martha taught us that. You know, you would make a good Martha one day. What? Yes, you remind me of her. You're strong and... And stubborn. Mm-hmm. And scary.

Scary? A bit. I'm anything but. I'm 163. Come now. Remember in London when I was being threatened by a mafia boss? Tony di Pasqua, of course. And you came into my office and shot him stone dead.

Ha! How could I forget? I saved your life. Yes. Oh. Yes? Oh, no. I always thought I saved your life, but...

What? Actually, I didn't, did I? What do you mean? Ah, Kozlovsky was right there in the basement. He would have come up and revived you, wouldn't he? It depends. On what? DiPasqua's shot.

I mean, a shot to the heart or brain, and there's nothing even Kozlovsky or patients could have done. Good. I'll cling to my victory, then. It's one of my two proudest moments. Oh? What's the other? When I got Amelia and myself out of those smart coffins. Oh. Hear that?

Ah. A pig axe and a spain, a spain, a spain, four and a shrouding sheet. Oh, a pit of clay for to be made. For such a guest is meat. Bit early for grave-diggers, isn't it? The early shift is for anonymous burials, or burials without a ceremony. Or mourners. Sad.

Perhaps. Look. What? The gravestone. It's so full of names now. And dates. My many deaths. Lord Darrell Arthur Duffer.

That's the time you were shot by arrows in Phoenix, Arizona in 1871. Yes, arrows are very pointy. Then up there, that's... I can't read the name. That's insular script. Or Merovingian. I can't remember. Must be 537.

Oh, the time Kosovovsky stabbed you in that tavern. A perfect illustration of what happens when we are left to our own devices. Yes. And 700 BC, that must be from your nomadic period in the desert. Yes, death by collapsing temple, landed right on my temples. Never had much luck with big stones, have you? Nope. What about this one, though?

834 Oh, that would be my brush with the bubonic plague You died of the bubonic plague? Yes, briefly Wait, 834, this must have happened during the Queen Basilia story Correct Why didn't you tell me about that? Well, Vasilia spanned four decades

So I had to focus on the important bits And you dying wasn't an important bit? I was only out for a few minutes Hang on, there's another death 835? Oh, yes, yes. The bubonic plague. I thought that was 834.

And 835. You died of the bubonic plague twice? I did. Within two years? It was very contagious. They're careless, don't you think? Well. Wasn't the whole point in the Basilia story that Kozlowski simulated the plague?

Oh, you know he's a perfectionist, Alvina. What does that mean? He sent me to Siena so I could study its symptoms. Oh, that's reckless. I came back to report on what I'd say. seen, but in the end my report wasn't necessary. He could study my oozing blisters, festering boils and blackening skin firsthand. Unbelievable. Oh. What? Something's just struck me. What? Do you think that's the real reason he sent me to Siena, to catch the plague and become a

case study? You think? I do. Oh, good. Yes, I do. Oh, when I see you again, I have a bone to pick with you, Mr. Kozlovsky. We need to talk about the year 834. And 835. No, 835 was my own fault. Ill-advised trip to Avonior to partake in the Feast of Fools. But Sienna! When I see you, Koslovsky, I'm going to... Yes?

I'm going to... Hug you. You must miss him so much. Yes. Yes, I do. Wherever he is, I'm sure he's thinking of you. There's someone else, too. Hmm?

Lorraine. Oh, yes. Maybe we should call her, no? I already have several times. Really? When? Oh, wait, is that why you took your phone? I was so surprised you never take your phone.

I hope she'd call me back. Well, maybe she will. It's been ten hours. The middle of the night. We always talk in the middle of the night. Well, we used to. She's angry. Angry?

Yes, with me. Why? Why haven't you told me the story of Lorraine? That seems like a story worth telling. Why did you miss that one out? Who is she? You know Lorraine, Alvina. I mean, she's my...

I know, I know she's your niece, but who is she really? And why is she angry with you? Look, some stories are too painful to tell. You've told me sad stories before. You told me about Joan and Bizzilia. And Martha? This wound is still fresh. It's a recent story. I get it.

But without it, I don't think this night is complete. This night is over. No. It's the morning. The birds are out. The gravediggers have started work. A new day, a new story. No. Why not?

I can't tell this story because it hasn't finished. I refuse for it to be finished. I have to see Lorraine again and bring it to an end. A good end. some things never change what after tonight i feel i know you better than ever before yet still you're a man of mystery good lord you're right well i guess as a druid you're entitled to a bit of mystery what no no no no i mean what you said about knowing me apart from itobar you probably know me better than anyone else what Really?

Yes. What about Amelia? She didn't get the rundown? Well, she did, but I'm not sure exactly how much she can recall. Why? Oh, well, remember that she took over on the eve of her grandmother's funeral. Yes, of course. Yes. Well, after Martha's wake, we gathered what booze was left and settled down in the drawing room at Plum Manor to tell her everything.

Right. Yes, but you see, Iterbal and I kept arguing over the details. Silly little things, you know, like did we use piastas or ducats in Sicily? Was the small fancier clipper or a frigate? Did we drink honey wine or mulled wine in Hamlin? Anyway, all these digressions rather distracted from the general thrust of the storm. Oh, poor Amelia, I can just picture it. Add to that three bottles of chardonnay from the wake,

a keg of Guinness from the local pub gifted to Miss Plum's plumbing for, fixing an overflowing urinal, and the last bottle of Martha's favorite Japanese whiskey. I get it. But we did really bond that night. But you never brought her up to speed later? Well, you know, a story here, a story there. But never like this. You know what office life is like.

You know, I did try, but no sooner have you faked one client's death by freak hail. The next one's at the door demanding a snowstorm. There's just never any time. Yes. That I know well. Area 51. I wonder how Ross is doing on Cliptrick. Miss Plum's Plumbing?

Punk, Britain. The hairdo. The secret submarine. Weimar Berlin. The Daily Phoenix. 221B Baker Street? The Wild West. Sicily, Revolutionary France.

the Seven Seas, a 17th century brothel. Yes. The Tower of London. Florence, Hamlin, Atlantis, a medieval tavern. Rome, Athens, the Judean desert, all the way to Stonehenge and a blazing Wickerman. Don't remind me. What a journey you've taken me on. Yes.

Did you enjoy it too, Sheba? What was your favourite story, Shiva? The rat catcher. You liked the one about the rats, did you? Yes, well, I bet you're a much better rat catcher than I ever was. Alvina? What is it now? There's another one.

Another what? Date. Another date. On the gravestone. Well, yes. I mean, as I said, I didn't tell you about all my deaths. That would be impossible. For instance, I haven't told you how I accidentally got shot in the set.

of Goncherov in 1973. All the time Sultan Mehmed had me executed in 1418 for seducing his wife, although that would have been a good story to tell, especially seeing as he wasn't married. But I had to make a selection, of course. Otherwise, this wouldn't take a night, but a year, and we don't have a year, do you? No, we don't. You're pale, Alvina. Look at the date.

Um It's difficult to read with all that moss What is that? 28th of March 2021 Ah Yes Right

You know what day that is right Oh yes Yes That's today What does that mean? Oh you know what it means No Paris

A city of light So, this is where the journey ends, Alvina. I won't let it happen. I won't. Alvina. You're not ready. Nobody is ever ready, not really. But Lorraine, you still need to finish something, right? Right?

Yes. And Kozlovsky, you need to give him a good ticking off about using you as the butt of a very irresponsible experiment, remember? I'll have to rely on you to provide the taking off. You're good at those. Stop it. I mean it So do I What

I'm not going to let this happen You can't argue with fate I beg to differ What We know at least one person who did Just that Who are you Give me a few hours

What Stay here, right here On this bench Well I thought I'd take one more stroll through Paris Gendarne Luxembourg The Pantheon Rue Mouffat With its pretty cafe

Too dangerous We mustn't tempt fate You could get hit by a bus, collide with a moped, slip on some dog shit. Dog shit? I love dogs, but why don't people in this blasted city clean up after their living? Alvina, this isn't the moment to be complaining about dogs. Stay put. But...

But... But... Promise. Do you promise? I promise. Good. I'll be as fast as I can. What are you going to do? I have an idea!

What's the idea, Alvina? What are you doing? Just stay put. What's she up to? God damn it. Do you know what she's up to, Sheba? No? No, at least you're still here to keep me company, aren't you?

You're not going anywhere, are you? You'll keep me company, won't you? Won't you? Join us again next week for Dear Dawn Many Deaths, Part 2. The Amelia Project is a production of imploding fictions. This episode featured Julia Seethorn as Alvina and Alan Bergen as the interviewer. It was written by Philip Thorne with story editing by Einstein-Ulsberg Bragha, directed by Philip Thorne and Aisthen Olsperk Braga,

with sound design by Alexander Dana, music by Frederick Barden, graphic design by Andash Piedersen, and production assistants by Marty Pacteval. It was recorded at Redpeace Studio in Vienna, with engineering by Apat Hadnagi and Oliver Illis. Thank you so much to all our Patreon and Apple subscriptions support. Waters, without you, the Amelia Project would disappear and reappear as a prayer book for the Apostles of Antathon.

A shout-out to our wonderful super patrons. At the time of recording, that's Michaela Sullivan, Celeste Joe's Heat 312, Albana Sant, Amelian, Alison, Stephanie Weidnella, Raphael, Edelado, Vifas Farrasacki, Alison Thore, Patricia Born Wagner, Bryce God, MacLeff, Heisinger, Michael West, McMuckin, Tibby, Florian Byers, Curtney Mays, Renson, Boo, Astra Kim, Olivia Dodson, Philip Hanson, Michael David Smith, LG, Ryan Burnett, Timmerthier, Miss Nixie, Mystic Sybil, Tiffany Duffy,

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