The Aspiring Psychologist Podcast - From Football Coach to Trainee Psychologist | Jack’s Unconventional Journey

Episode Date: December 8, 2025

In this episode, I speak with first year trainee clinical psychologist Jack Griffiths about his unconventional journey from football coaching in Wales to securing a training place after six DClinPsy application cycles. We discuss how he used non traditional experience to build his psychology identity, the challenges of being a male applicant in a female dominated profession, the pressure to demonstrate vulnerability in interviews, and what helped him stay grounded through years of uncertainty. Jack reflects on assistant psychologist roles, rejection, resilience, supervision, and the value of authenticity in developing as a clinician. This episode is ideal for aspiring psychologists preparing applications, strengthening reflection skills and carving out their own unique path into the profession.Highlights00:00 – Introducing Jack’s journey and years of persistence on the path to training01:20 – Meeting Jack and how his football coaching background first caught my attention01:54 – Jack’s route into psychology after repeated ACL injuries led him into coaching02:49 – Working with teenage academy players and using psychology to build culture, leadership and communication03:31 – How a love of psychology began early, and why Jack followed curiosity rather than a fixed plan05:28 – Staying grounded and authentic while entering a new profession06:11 – Using experiences from football and lifeguarding to strengthen reflections and clinical applications07:37 – Applying motivational interviewing and coaching models on the pitch, including autonomy and self leadership09:14 – Bringing personal style to coaching and rejecting outdated coaching stereotypes09:59 – We discuss being male in a female dominated psychology profession and how this shapes vulnerability and growth11:51 – How gender dynamics shape reflection and openness in interviews and supervision14:19 – Applying six times to training, losing confidence and feeling stuck as an assistant psychologist16:23 – Why assistant roles vary, and the emotional toll of years of striving for a single outcome18:25 – Interview challenges: authenticity vs playing “the reflection game” in high pressure situations20:32 – How men in psychology often start at a disadvantage around vulnerability expectations22:47 – Thoughts on equality, diversity and inclusion, and how men sometimes fall outside the conversation24:13 – Navigating assessment during training and handling power dynamics in supervision26:23 – How allowing yourself to start from zero on placement can lead to the biggest growth29:31 – The emotional impact of not being “chosen” for a placement and managing ego and comparison32:17 – Early anxieties about meeting supervisors and fitting into new teams33:42 – Final reflections and encouragement for aspiring psychologists on their own unconventional pathsLinks:📚 📲🫶 To support me by donating to help cover my costs for the free resources I provide click here: https://the-aspiring-psychologist.captivate.fm/support📚 To check out The Clinical Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3jOplx0 📖 To check out The Aspiring Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3CP2N97 💡 To check out or join the aspiring psychologist membership for just £30 per month head to:

Hi, I'm Max and a work as an assistant psychologist in a learning disability service in West Yorkshire. Like most people working in psychology, I'm slowly but surely working myself up to that seemingly impossible goal of getting onto the clinical doctorate. With that end goal in mind, I thought I'd have a look at what's out there and see what books might be helpful for this. I came across Marianne's book, The Clinical Psychologist Collective, and decided that this would be a great buy for me to help me on my journey. I found Marianne's book really informative, most insightful. I especially liked how the story has reassured me that you don't need to be academically perfect to become a psychologist, and that as long as you have good

interpersonal skills, such as compassion and empathy, you will get there. I would highly recommend this book to all aspiring psychologists, and also those who want to know a bit more about the world of clinical psychology. It made me want to work in that field one day. Imagine chasing a psychology career dream for years, rejection after rejection and still finding the courage to keep showing up. That's the story of today's guest Jack, a trainee clinical psychologist who applied six times before finally securing his place on the doctorate. Jack's route has been anything but ordinary from football coaching in Wales to working as an assistant psychologist. He's woven his love of teamwork, mindset and motivation into a journey defined by perseverance

and purpose. In this episode, we talk about what it really takes to keep believing in yourself when the system feels impossible, the self-doubt, the sacrifice and the quiet moments of resilience that get you there in the end. sometimes success in psychology isn't about being chosen, it's about choosing to keep going. Hope you find it so useful and if you do, please like, subscribe and follow for more. Hi, welcome along to the aspiring psychologist podcast. I am Dr. Marianne, a qualified clinical psychologist and I'm joined here today by Jack Griffith, who is a first-year trainee clinical psychologist.

Hi, Jack. Hi. Thank you so much for agreeing to come on this episode. You've been on my radar for a little while because you contributed as a case study to a chapter that I wrote on a book on auto-ethnography. So that's where you first caught my eye because you were talking about your work kind of as an academy coach and kind of the responsibility and the pleasure that it brought you, but how it helped you think about kind of psychology and psychology principles. Could you tell us a little bit about your route, Jack?

Yeah, so I started coaching football around the age of 23, 24, after I had a couple of ACL injuries. Tommy ACL was the third time I've done it, so I thought it was time to hang up the boots in and delve into the world of coaching. And at the same time, I was an assistant psychologist, and I quickly discovered how important it was to kind of merge those two passions of mine and how they kind of reinforce one another and how they helped improve myself as a coach, but also as a practitioner. And that's for loads of different reasons. I think it was communication was a big one, how you interact with people, your leadership styles, and probably most importantly, the culture you create.

And as soon as I use some of the psychological principles that I've learned as an assistant, and through my undergraduate degree and whatnot, we really helped improve that culture and create a nice environment for the young lads. So a lot of the boys we were working with, with teenage of 16 and 19. So it's quite an impressionable age. Yeah, quite the responsibility as well

because I think for all the boys, football is their world as it was for me for a while. Yeah, and it goes really well. I've lived a lot, developed my skills really well, and it was a really good five years. I've had lots of different roles The last role I had was Chairman of the club

So it's quite a big club in Wales In fairness I'd say it's more than a grass It was an academy at one point And I've been first team coach I've been player I've been lots of different things really And it's yes

It's put me in good stead For training now on the On the doctorate finally Yeah absolutely And we'll talk a little bit About that word finally shortly as well But actually before we hit record

you told me a really lovely story about how psychology came into your life. And it's too powerful a story to not tell and not let you tell. Could you retell us that? Yeah, I think for me, psychology has been something I've been interested in probably for my teenage years. I'm something I've always been interested in, always being curious about. And you don't really learn about it at comprehensive school, doing your GCSEs. It certainly wasn't a topic we studied in school. But it was something I was drawn to.

I remember doing English lessons. We have to go to the library and pick books. And I was often drawn to the science and psychology section, picking up books on memory and learning the method of locale and people testing me on lists of items I can remember. And I was very curious and very passionate about that. And that led me then to psychology A levels across Keyes College. and I think the first person I spoke to on the open day

was the psychology teacher and it's kind of gone from there then. I've just kind of followed my interests. I think lots of people, especially on the course, they've wanted to be a clinical psychologist since they were like 17, 18, whereas for me, it's just been following what I'm interested and maybe what I'm good at as well

and what I'm drawn to. Yeah, so I've gone through a conventional route in that sense, but I feel like since I've graduated, it's been maybe a little bit more on convention, and a little bit different to most people, There's many football coaches slash trainee psychologists in the country. And, yeah, it does, it does make me sound a little bit different. And, yeah, something that I think is really complemented to each other

and certainly help me in each of the areas. But also, I think it's because I enjoy both of those things as well. So if I can merge those two, I'm enjoying life, really. And that is so lovely to see, because actually sometimes people join training and they're like, oh I'm not this is not what I thought this isn't good but like you're pleased with where you're at and you know with with I guess you've still been able to I say you still feel like you I think that's kind of what's coming across yeah yeah I don't know if I've changed I probably haven't

changed much I think you'd have to ask my friends and family if I've changed me I don't think I have to be honest now I feel quite grounded and quite secure in who I am or what I enjoy and why I'm interested and I think as long as you do that And as long as you're following you, you're interested, and your passions and doing what's right for you, I think you're going to be fine. Yeah. And I did an episode with Jack Lowe. We were talking about job crafting. And that's the idea of actually being able to take your experiences, what you've learned, maybe some of the vulnerabilities there, from seemingly kind of maybe not super relevant roles, not directly clinical relevant roles anyway.

Have you been able to do that a little bit from your experiences with your academy work and with the kind of young men that you've been coaching? So kind of weave into your psychology reflections and interviews and applications. Yeah, I think early on it was one of those messages you often get from people with psychology. Nearly everything is relevant. If you're working as a lifeguard like I used to do, if you're working with lots of different people, it's going to help your people skills, your interpersonal skills, which is really, really important. So I've kind of always, I suppose subconsciously maybe I've always thought about what can I take from

this and apply it to psychology. And that's certainly what you do when you're applying for jobs and things. So thinking about how my time as a lifeguard helped me assess risk and work with people and deal with people. That was always something I thought about. So when I've had to do that with football, it was probably a lot easier because I was doing it at the same time as well. So I was literally leaving the hospital and going across the road, Nestra up and up and up to the training pitch and coaching people, coaching the young boys. And then I think at first I probably didn't bridge that gap.

It probably took a little bit of reflection, a little bit of thinking about, okay, what can I do here? And the more I learned as an assistant psychologist, the more I could apply to my role as an academy coach, as a football coach. And he thought, yeah, I started bringing in things quite literally then. And it was using things at the Oscar model and motivational interview and doing halftime team talks, for example. That was something that I thought,

okay, this is real tangible thing I can take over quite concrete here and quite specific. And it would often be the case of asking people, okay, what have they done well this half? What can we do better? And having them come up with their own ideas, that was quite a little, I thought it was a little clever trick that they used to do at halftime. And the boys used to talk.

We give them autonomy. We give them competency. They feel quite related. You know, building on that self-determined. theory. And that was something I kept in mind quite often, especially because they were young boys, and I thought that was part of their game that they needed to develop. We need to create leaders and that sense of ownership on the pitch. So I've thought about that quite a lot, and that's maybe something I've talked about in the article I wrote in the psychologist as well.

And I really learned a little bit more when I was writing an article about what I've learned as a coach and what I've applied. And then the other things are just kind of the things I learned from like child and families to think about what's happening at home for these people thinking about the ABC model or the iceberg model, all those sort of things thinking a bit more deeply about the players and they are people

and they were a good bunch of lads to work with they were lovely lads academy boys all wanted to do really well so it was quite a good quite a good bunch to to apply those psychological principles on really know the boys deeper than I think just being myself was really helpful as well

quite an extravert I quite like people I'm curious about people anyway so I didn't have to really change my personality much at all it was just more about being yourself not trying to be like a stereotypical football coach really we are shouting and telling boys off that's not my style and as soon as I appreciate that I think I thought I enjoy it more as well and the boys responded better as well and we've had some success we've got a couple of league titles and it was a good good five years yeah amazing and i bet they'll really miss you and you'll obviously miss aspect of that you might not miss the draughty uh drafty welsh weather um i spare i'm now a football mum i have a whole coat that i've bought um i've got a whole outfit um yeah if it's raining

or windy it's not always the most pleasant place to be is it um and as we're talking like Like, I'm really thinking about your experience of also, you know, being male and psychology and even picking up that psychology book and, you know, asking your mates to quiz you on kind of brain parts. Like, that can't have been that easy even being different. I'm guessing most of your friends probably weren't picking up psychology books. But maybe they were. Maybe this is like, you know, the friendship group that you had.

But raising your head up and being like, actually, I'm going to pursue psychology. I want to ultimately be a qualified psychologist one day and I'm male. Could you talk to us a little bit about that? Yeah, it's an interesting concept because I think when I was growing up, especially in comprehensive school, and even when I went to A-levels, I didn't see it as like a female-dominated profession. Actually, I don't think my friends do either. So the friends who haven't really worked in psychology, they probably would have given me a bit of stick

for working with like a female I don't think they know so hopefully they don't see this part of the podcast but it's nothing I thought of either and I think mainly that's because if you think of some of the famous psychologists they tend to be men I think some of them are prominent ones at the moment

it tends to be more men and it was only until I remember quite vividly I walked into Manchester University Open Day and it must have been like 80% 80% girls there and my dad turned to me

I can see why you want to do psychology now I think I didn't know about this. This is kind of the first time I've realized it was female dominated. And then I've gone into the undergraduate. And you see it's like, you know, 75%, 80% women on the course. And it's the same now when you go to go into clinical. For me, I've kind of enjoyed that. I think growing up, I got two brothers, all my cousins are boys,

all my mates with boys, really. I was very much a football rugby kind of guy who would spend all this time with boys. At one point you could say, you know, would it be difficult working with whether it hasn't been at all? I've really enjoyed it. And I think it's quite enjoyable being sometimes the only man or one of the few men's on the team because you do bring something new. You do have different insights and different perspectives on things and you do feel quite valued.

Yeah, so I've kind of enjoyed it. It does, I think it is a little bit harder for some men in psychology. I think it's certainly hard to, let me talk about before, show your vulnerability and open up and be really reflective. I feel like maybe men start a few years behind. It takes a little bit longer to catch up. I feel like women's maybe got maybe more of a running start at that. But as soon as you're able to develop those skills and learn them,

it does become easier. But I think it's something I thought about a lot. Is it a positive or negative? And remember when I first started off, my supervisor said you're going to have to work a little bit harder in clinical psychology because you're a man. I took over the pinch of thought, it's not going to be like that, it's going to be fine. It's very, all the talk around equality and diversity and, you know, people will acknowledge that.

And he was probably right when I look back. Yeah, so it's full of challenge, but it's full of opportunities as well, I think, being one of the few men in the course, it does allow you to do maybe things that other people don't. Yeah, and that question and kind of, the conversation had come up because, because like I said, well, as soon as I got your submissions for the auto-ethnography chapter, like, I just was really taken by the way that you'd, you know, submitted them and what you'd written, and even the length of what you'd written on the survey, like, it was just really impressive. And I, and I kind of said to you, well, how long has it taken you to get to where you are now? And you were like, oh, sort of lost

account really but maybe like about six six applications and like so you've really kept trying but does is it okay to ask how old you are yeah I was 31 in January okay so you're not we're not super much older than most people but it's how you've kept going and actually the choices you've made so you are Welsh and you've never lived outside of Wales But actually, you know, you have had reserve place offers for the University of South Wales, but last year that didn't come about and you were like, actually, I've got this place offer at this uni and I'm going for it. I'm taking control and I'm, you know, I'm leaving the country

that has been, has raised me. You know, that's not an easy decision to make, but I'm really pleased that it's working out for you. But really in psychology, because of the small nature, I think of assistant jobs as well and certainly doctoral places, people will often move, will uproot their entire life. I only moved from the kind of Milton Keynes area to Coventry, but I still did it. Still got all of my belongings moved, you know? And it's not a small thing to do, is it? Like, but it's that passion that drives you. Yeah, I was always taking aback when I hear people move from like London and parts of England to work in Newport for an assistant role.

So people move for assistant roles, which is it's not something I probably would have done, to be honest. There's plenty of opportunities in South Wales. I did work in Powers for a bit, which was like an hour there, an hour back commute. And that was quite tough, especially when the fuel prices were as high as they were. I think it was 2022, 21, when it was like 200 litre for diesel. Yeah, people do do it. And it is so competitive. I think that's why people do it.

It's that over-competitiveness. But it's also, for a lot of people, I feel clinical psychology is the only route that's feasible for them due to the funding, due to the cost. I think that's why there's that, seeing that bottleneck you see. And unfortunately, lots of graduates in psychology, they don't use that degree directly. They go off and do other things because they see clinical psychologists, is not a feasible option for them.

You do need a little bit of luck. You do need a bit of good timing. I was lucky in a way that I got my first assistant role sort of nine months after my master's. I don't know how long I would have stuck at doing it, but I didn't realize how much I enjoyed until I did it. So that, you know, I was lucky I got a foot in the door failure early on in my career.

And then that year and roles you enjoy. So that always helps. Yeah, certainly this year, when I was on the reserve list for Cardiff this year, and I didn't get an interview again. and that's kind of the second time I haven't got an interview after having an interview. And I finally said I'm an interview really tough. I didn't think I did as well as maybe the Cardiff courses,

but I must have done something right. But I remember speaking to my supervisor saying, I'm kind of done with this. Now I can't, because I'm 31, I'm still an assistant. People around me are getting on, but I'm not getting it. I don't know why I'm doing wrong. I can't do much more. I've got publications, all these different roles.

I've worked in research. I've worked across the lifespan. I can't do anymore. Yeah, and I was kind of done with it, to be honest. And I was starting to think of other things to do, maybe going back and study in medicine or going and working in a completely different field where I can bring more money quickly.

But thankfully, last it to attend, I got on. And yeah, I haven't looked back, really. I'm just pleased I go on because it is, I think this is the field that I'm suited to the best, and this is where I feel most comfortable. it suits my skills and it's probably here I can go the furthest end so but for lots of people they don't get the rubber the green they don't get the luck or they don't they haven't got the ability to move away for whatever reason whereas the financial or personal reasons they

they can't move from london to from where else to london or to liverpool or glasgow or wherever because they've got other things going on absolutely and I think you before we started recording you'd say actually it's actually really hard to kind of go into an interview where you've never met them before, you don't know anything about them, and to then be really vulnerable, you know, from a standing start.

And I guess this is what we ask our clients to do as well, isn't it? But you kind of said that actually that's really, it feels tricky because that's not necessarily something that you do regularly. It takes you time to build those relationships. So that's maybe an additional barrier to getting, kind of, to getting you in the profession. Yeah, I think during my Saddam's, for example, I'm sat there

and there's three or four women looking back at me and I'm thinking, I've been told time and time again, I need to show vulnerability, and I need to do this, I know you do that. But it's almost like it's ingrained in you not to do that, and your gut feeling is saying don't show your vulnerability, don't show your weakness here. And sometimes, yeah, you just can't do it, even though you feel like that's the thing to do,

which is a bit, I felt that's quite a natural. and that's not me then being authentic. It's almost like, I got to say something, I got to show a weakness, you have vulnerability, because that's what they like. So it's kind of the whole interview mentality then, I suppose, where you're doing things, you want to be yourself, but also you've got to sort of play the game a little bit,

and I didn't like that part of the interview, I suppose, where you've got to do things that doesn't feel natural to you. I think when you're in a stressful environment and you get one shot of this, otherwise you've got to do the whole stressful, rigorous, decline application again and wait another year and you're still in the system role that pressure does get you and you do go back to what you know and what you feel safe doing and that is you know what men do best is just saying everything's fine and getting on the things and saying yeah it's

great and I definitely did that in the Southampton interview maybe towards the end I did I was I was able to express that but even in the feedback it was like yeah shows a bit more vulnerability but for men that's really hard the conditioned for the last 30 years not to do that really really so yeah and it's whether we can i guess as supervisors um either male or supervise male or female supervisors it's whether we can i guess really recognize that and really try to use supervision as a space not just for client protection and kind of case management but to think about vulnerability and trying to weave in that and and reflect is that something that's been done with you in supervision? Do you think that's something that would be beneficial to do more

of? Can you do it now as a trainee, for example? I feel like, yeah, when you get on the course, you do feel a little bit more confident, a little bit more relaxed. As an assistant, you're still on that kind of rat race a little bit. You're trying to get on and you're trying to get to the next checkpoint. You're trying to do the best you can. I think it probably takes more than just supervision once a week with a clinical psychologist who you're working with. I think to break down those barriers and change how men think it's going to take more than that I think it's more about changing more taking into consideration how men work in psychology and and adhering to those needs rather than trying to change the men because I feel like the system at the moment does

suit women more because of that emphasis on reflection and showing vulnerability whereas it's really hard for men to do that I think thinking about it is not the problem we're able to reflect and think about it's just verbalising it and putting that out to especially around women women you don't know. But yeah, when you get comfortable in supervision, I feel like that's been the case. But at the same time, I think it's easier to reflect and share your vulnerability

with someone you can relate to. But that's difficult as a man in psychology because there's very few people like us in the profession. So, yes, it's a difficult balancing act to have. And it's something that I think should be taken into consideration more. It is difficult. then we talk about equality and diversity and inclusion

and trying to make things as accessible for everybody. But unfortunately, I don't feel like men are brought into that conversation as much as maybe they could be. And I think it's a bit of a paradox with society and clinical psychology. It's a bit of, it's the other way I feel. Yeah, and it's definitely, I hear you. Like, it's really hard when you are striving in a career to be vulnerable enough that that's seen as good.

That's very good. And not so vulnerable that you're unhinged and need a safeguarding referral put in and you don't then get a reference. Like it's striking that magic balance. And yeah, it's like it's that power dynamic, isn't it? That actually especially as an assistant that you don't always have.

And I think my experiences of then moving on to training and I had six different supervisors during my time and very quickly having to forge working relationships with those some more successfully than others and still having that power held over you, you know, you haven't been there yet because you're yet to start your first placement, but there will be likely a mid-placement review and during that mid-placement review, a question will be asked,

is there any chance that Jack could fail this placement? I can tell you that, you know, when you're waiting for that answer, you're like, oh, my God. And once you hear, hopefully, no, you're like, and then you really can be thinking about how to, you know, meet your goals and finish this placement on a high. But you are constantly assessed for those three years. Yes, it's not something I've thought about too much in fairness. but I think given given like you said it's been a long time getting on the course and that comes with lots of different assistant psychology roles that's that's certainly going to be that's certainly going to help me on the on the course I think I'm kind of used to changing and working

in different teams quite frequently there's very yeah there's I've worked in all the big settings really I've worked in older adult child and family there's a comment in adult psychology so I've kind of got lots of skills like I can always lean back on. But being assessed is something new again. Having that conversation is going to be difficult. Yes, I haven't thought about it. So it's going to be, it's going to be interested and how I deal with maybe criticism and rooms for improvement. I think there'll be something I'll have to get used to. Not many, I think with assistant psychologists, it's often very positive. They want to build you up and make you feel more confident.

thought about that to you honest marian so however yeah well food for thought but um do do allow yourself to grow into these new roles i think we can often put ourselves a lot of pressure on ourselves to go into a placement feeling like we are the expert at that already or that we should be better you know and i think almost one of the most powerful placement experiences i had was intellectual disabilities because I had never worked in that setting. And so I actually went in feeling like a bit of a fraud, actually. How am I going to go and deliver anything of substance when I just I've got to start from zero really. But when I allowed myself to do that and I, you know, I was honest on day one with my supervisor, I've never done this before. I don't really, I don't really know what I'm doing.

And maybe I haven't even ever really applied for roles, even as assistance with people with intellectual disabilities, because A, I didn't think I'd get them. And B, it wasn't really one of my passions, you know? So now I'm delivering a service to people and to their families. And my supervisor was so kind and so sweet and just allowed me to grow. And actually, when my placement was finished, they were like, we would love to have you back as qualified. and they were trying to put a job together so that it would be ready

so that it would have gone through the funding by the time I finished training. And unfortunately, it just wasn't ready. It wasn't ready for another sort of six months after I qualified. So I already had a job, but they still contacted me and said, it's ready, it's going out to advert, will you apply? And I was like, I'm really sorry, like,

I don't feel like I can now. But that is, if we allow ourselves to grow and we are maybe open about what we don't yet know. We can grow beyond where we would have imagined we might be able to be. That's, I guess, the value in allowing yourself to be curious and allowing yourself to grow and maybe being a little bit open. Yeah, I think that's the subtle differences in it between placements and assistance like Alders roles.

In a strange way, you haven't paying a hat to go into that job like you would do with an assistant. and you haven't applied for it, said why you're going to be great at it, and then go to do it. Whereas with the placements, you kind of, you're put into it, you've applied for clinical psychology, so you've been honest about that, but then when you're placing that placement, then maybe you don't feel confident,

or maybe you don't think you're going to enjoy. But that's not you being disingenuous or, you know, anything like that, it's kind of, well, this is how I feel, but I think, like you said, it is important to go in with an open mind. It's absolutely been in that position where maybe some of the roles, I thought I was going to join, maybe it didn't enjoy as much as I thought, and vice versa.

And, yeah, I think when I've worked in intellectual disabilities, I had a similar feeling. How am I going to work with this clientele? I haven't got loads of experience. Everyone seems to really know what they're doing. But then when you keep that open mind and you learn and pick up skills, I think I probably learned so much more on those roles than maybe my other roles because I was soaking everything up and trying to learn as much as I can just so I can do the job, really. and it wasn't as scary and it wasn't as different as I thought it was going to be really

and you're still able to bring all those skills and experience you've got from other roles into that role that maybe seems so different to what I've done before as well. Absolutely. We've got those core skills and our own personhood that we bring with us. And, you know, I think even every supervision session you've ever had and every supervisor you ever had, they're kind of in the room with you as well. So it's not that you're starting completely from zero. You've still got your soft skills. You've still got ways of being.

And obviously, even people with intellectual disabilities, you're often working with their families. They're often not intellectually disabled themselves. And so there's lots of transferable skills. But, yeah, you've reminded me, actually, in my first placement, I found it really challenging to not have been chosen. Yeah, that's the other side of the client, I suppose.

Yeah, you haven't been chosen. And knowing that I'm filling the shoes of someone that's just left, and I'm filling the shoes of a first year who has done two placements already, and I'm coming in as a first year first placement. I found it really hard. I don't know if it's my ego, I'm not sure, but I found it really hard. Because obviously in assistant roles, you are chosen, because probably there's been 150 people apply,

and you're the cream of the crop. it almost maybe develops this slightly narcissistic, you know, I've been chosen so I can go in there and I can feel a bit more confident and self-assured. I wasn't chosen. Not by this, not by this woman anyway. You know, some of the people that interviewed me, they chose me. You know, I haven't been chosen. I could have been anyone. Maybe they'd have preferred someone else. And then you find yourself sitting there and you think, oh yeah, that person from my cohort, they would probably have fitted in better here than me. And it's a lot of noise. but we can notice those thoughts.

We can notice them and not hopefully be derailed by them. Yeah, yeah, I sent an email to my, so we had our placements this week and I sent an email to my new supervisor. And it was almost like, part of me was thinking when I send this email, I want to come across as quite competent

and I'm going to be okay, I can do this job, don't worry, I'm not completely useless. I think I mentioned I've worked in this service before and I probably said that just so she doesn't, think, oh, I've got this person doesn't know anything. At least I'm going in with a little bit of a knowledge and, you know, I'm not, I'm going to be able to do the job somewhat, so kind of don't worry sort of thing. But it was an unusual, yeah, it's an unusual situation to be in.

And I suppose, yeah, your ego does come and do it a little bit because you want to be, you want to be okay doing the job really, and you want to be valued and not made to feel like you shouldn't be there. Yeah, I had a slightly cringy moment then, just thinking back. So I've been given a time and a date and a location to go, meet my first ever supervisor but i like i maybe i worried that i wasn't going to be held in mind um or that i needed something like extra so i did actually make contact with i think i emailed my supervisor or called them and left a message or something like that um and they're like

yeah yeah did you not get the message about the time and the day i was like yeah yes but like okay i see you know because ordinarily plans aren't made for us are they we we make our own plans or all the person has made them directly with us or sent it to us and it's come kind of vicariously round the houses and i just needed to i needed to be seen a bit more um but thank she didn't she didn't hold that against me yeah it's unusual it's a start a place when you haven't met the person before so obviously with your assistant roles you would have met them in an interview or had a chat beforehand can we sort of dbs check out where do i get my laptop from i don't think i don't think we're going to do that for this you just kind of turn on the day

and you probably turn up, nobody knows who you are. You've got an awkward conversation with the receptionist. Hi, I'm Jack. I'm here for my first day. Jack, who are you here to see? And you're like, thinking of the name is, I think it's Ali. I think that's her name. It's always uncomfortable the first day.

But that's something I've got used to anyway. I think you've just got to go in knowing it's not, it's probably not going to go smoothly. It's going to be a bit chaotic on the first day. Hopefully I'm wrong, but probably right. You never know. You know, I've joined some services that are like that. I've joined others that you turn up and on day one,

there's 12 folders on your desk and you're like, oh, okay, they did know, they didn't know I was coming. Now I've got to get up to speed. So yeah, it's all placements are so different, but just go with it and be curious, be reflective, if you can, and just allow yourself to grow, to learn, to develop and know that all of those great skills that you spoke about, you know, even stuff that you've done with the coaching for your academy, all of that is with you, all the boys you've worked with, they want you to do really, really well, as does everyone else who knows you, and we're all rooting for you as well, Jack. So I hope placement one and beyond goes so well for you.

Thank you so much for joining us, Jack. Thanks very much. Thank you again to my guest today, Jack. The kindest thing you can do is to go wild in the comments with support, with encouragement, with how this resonated for you. And I know that Jack would be really pleased to see those comments as well. You can do that on YouTube. you can do that on Spotify.

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