The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya - A Freshly-Peeled Lease on Life with Trixie and Katya

Episode Date: February 3, 2026

Dear Dr. Whiffenschtuppel, I write to you this day to express my deepest gratitude for changing my life. Long ago, I remember staring at my banana on the kitchen counter, bruised and drooping with despair; a perfect reflection of my life before Bocox. Every day felt soft, sad, and permanently past its prime. I meandered through my days burdened with shame and grief, wondering how something once so full of potential and promise could end up so utterly limp and forgotten; pushed to the back of the proverbial kitchen drawer of existence, right behind an old D battery. Then Bocox entered my life and somehow, miraculously, my banana stood tall again; firm with hope and glowing with newfound confidence. Each and every morning I gaze down at it, radiant and renewed as tears well in my eyes. Because Bocox didn't just save my banana, it gave it an unflappable, tumescent second chance. XOXO, Katya Z. You’re going to love Hungryroot as much as we do! For a limited time, get 40% off your first box PLUS get a free item in every box for life! Go to: https://Hungryroot.com/BALD and use code BALD This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp! Sign up and get 10% off at: https://BetterHelp.com/BALD Ro offers the first FDA-approved GLP-1 pill for weight loss at the lowest cost around! To see if you’re eligible for the new GLP-1 pill on Ro, head to: ⁠https://Ro.co/BALD⁠ Get a free can of OLIPOP! Buy any 2 cans of Olipop in store, and Olipop will pay you back for one! Works on any flavor, any retailer. Head to: https://Drinkolipop.com/BALD Getting contacts doesn’t have to be a hassle. Let 1-800 Contacts get you the contact lenses you need right now. Order online at https://1800Contacts.com or download the free 1-800 Contacts app today! Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch the podcast on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemotel.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Listen and Watch Anywhere! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow Trixie: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemattel.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   Follow Katya: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.welovekatya.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/welovekatya⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   #TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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It gently cleanses, perfectly removes makeup. up and provide 24-hour hydration. Clear away the evidence with the number one Missler water worldwide by Garnier. We are very excited to announce that our very bald and very beautiful podcast tour is almost sold out for spring. I'm excited. We're not doing that many dates

and my New Year's resolution is quality over quantity. Over quantity. And we're doing it. We're doing it. Can you believe we had to add a second show to Boston and Toronto? Queen. We sure did.

So you fucking Bostonians in Toronto. know when turantites or whatever the f*** you call yourselves, you better get some tickets. Yeah. Snatch him up. We do have a few seats left for some of these cities and we are not doing that many of these this year. It's going to be hot. It's going to be exclusive. It's going to be fabulous.

Tickets available now at tricksey and katie.com. Quing. A to an cigarette. We're talking about Maria Bamford. Maria Bamford is probably I was just talking to my friend Mallory who introduced me on the way on the way here was talking to Mallory.

She introduced me to Maria. Bamford special special special special special I could not believe it was like I could not believe it her parents like politely laughing the whole time like it was crazy that is what inspired when I did the one night only during like COVID towns yeah it was so brilliant and she's so she's like the best comedian she's amazing and you know have you ever listened to dana gould I think so I feel like they have a similar if you ever in a grocery store of comics they'd be in the same aisle gosh let's say yeah yeah he's so funny too it's so absurd and why and why and um love maria and that work mix that i do that like nine to five she recovered from the money mix

there's a bunch of maria in there because she has all those sections about work oh okay um like for example i really like the way your peach polly weave sweats to her homes up over the edge of your that one i know that one why don't you come into my cubicle i got that one in there and i got um girlfriend hey hey um there's gonna be a really fun party tonight And it's going to be some really cute guys. You're going to meet at the door, park their cars, take their coats, and speak only when spoken to. Yes. Yes.

I have because I was like, she talks so much about like work. I was like, I got to put her in here. And her voice, like for a gay bar environment, cuts through. Because he has kind of like that high frequency voice. Maria? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like in a mix, she just cuts through everything.

Oh, totally, totally. It's great. Maria, if you ever want to quit stand up, you should just do voiceover for drag queen lip sinks. How about that? Well, she also does voiceover for like a million cartoons. Yes, she does. Love Maria. Shout out to Maria.

I was, I had to show my friends. You never lift up women. This is huge. Hard left. Rebrand? I've pivoted from total misogyny. I think 2026 is about, not feminism. Right.

Certainly not. You're going to support her, but you're going to call her like Marina Bradford or something. Marina Bradford. And then I'm going to, I'm going to send her a death threat or something. Right. Yeah. I'm going to, no. No, I had to, I had to.

I had to listen to the Pauline suicide note recipe. Oh, it's so good. It's just so good. And then I had to listen to ladies, ladies, when we're dating, we have a system. We do. We have a system. We do. And it's just the her, oh, God, her like, I can't feel my hands.

Yeah, yeah. It's like, I'm empty inside. I can't feel my hands. The one is I also love when she sing. Or the land of the free. I'm trapped. Love. That's what is that unwanted thoughts?

Unwanted thoughts. The one with her with her dogs on the front. Yeah, it's called Roadshow at the end. And it's so funny. She's like, Did you like 20%? Yeah, I love everything. Old baby.

Saturation point. Which she talks about fighting with her husband. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I liked old baby. Love old baby. Lady Dynamite was, I cannot believe Lady Dynamite was made. That show was bananas. I think that was the last thing Netflix took a chance on.

Yeah. I mean that lovingly. It was like the last truly out there piece. Yeah. Now they're doing Bone Lake. I wish, if it was up to me, Netflix would become, you say Lady Dynamite,

and that's all we get. Yeah, yeah. It would be like, ladies? Netflix is, I think this is open to everyone's news. Netflix is opening pods on the platform. Like, like how you might watch Baldwin the Beautiful on YouTube. You're not going to be able to watch,

let's say, Caleb Heron's show if he signs a Netflix. You'll be able to watch it on. the app. Oh. Right? We get any money? I think it's in the trades. By the trades, I mean something that people screenshot me and send me.

Gotcha. Do we get money? No, we're not on it. Great. Our show is on, our show is free range. Does Gia Gun have a family of other guns? Like, I just, is she pro-gun? Jay, what about?

This is my daughter confetti and my sister water. You know what I mean? Like, my daughter, this is my brother Glock in my, in my sister, AR-15. This is my, and this is my son, 10-millimeter. Desert Eagle. You know? Desert Eagle, what's that? 50 caliber handgun.

Oh. Yeah. We got new headphones. Barretta. That's a girl's name. In what neighborhood, girl? The gun neighborhood. I'm talking about guns.

Oh, it's a baretta gun. It's a baretta. Confetti gun. Water gun. Squirt gun. Oh, James Gun. Gea Gun's porn studio squirt gun. Hell yeah.

You ready for squirt gun? The dolls are the dolls. The dolls are wet. I see that bitch on TikTok Live all the time. Okay. I don't go on TikTok. Is she shaking her titties and showing her pussy? No. Spreading them lips.

She always looks great. She's got the good front lighting. She really is quite beautiful. And she just talks to what I perceive to be other people on live. They just talk. I did catch a glimpse of maybe I'm remembering this wrong. But she was asked, which do you like better, me or you? And then she said, I like them both equally.

Oh, you know, I like her too. I like her too. I mean, she's iconic. She's iconic. I cannot believe. I mean, I'll never forget her looking over to me, the non sequitur, do you, do you believe in milk and cookies. Maybe it wasn't on-secret or maybe you don't know what it means.

Maybe it's, is that a street drug? No, it was it was apropos of nothing. We were silent in the, in the, in the taxi for like five minutes. She's like, can't, yeah. Do you believe in milk and cookies? It was just like, what? You said, let's take a break. And you just got out of the car in the freeway.

It just dropped and rolled in Brazil. We need to normal. Okay, normalize jumping out of cars on the freeway. Let's have that conversation. Hope this helps. Yeah. Drag isn't dangerous. Well, getting dragged is dangerous.

Dragged by a semi. Ooh, that's not... Wait, I have a snack. A what? Okay. Or the land... Wait. This is the greatest job in the world.

In the greatest country in the world. Oh, say, can you see... Where did you get there? Pop rocks? No, no, no. Oh. Okay. So, this is not an app.

This is not a paid ad. Oh. This is not a paid ad. We do ads with Thrive, right? They send fabulous snacks. This is so delicious. Okay, I can't wait. All natural and 50 calories.

I tried it last night and I was like... What is it? Okay, they're called organic fruit circles, super sunny strawberry, made with mango, apple, strawberry, and natural flavors. Peel and eat fruit leather. Don't let that... My mouth is watering. Just open it and try one.

My mouth is watering. The whole... pack is 50 calories. That is not a selling point for me. I wish it was 500 calories. Well, those of us who on a molecular level are living hoarders buried alive, we need to operate in a calorie deficit. Get your nails done.

It's really funny to walk around and tell people you just get your nails done and you didn't. They're still wet and they're dirty. I literally brought this from home for you to try. Okay, so it kind of unrolls, but it's good, girl. They're delicious. Let their, for the listeners on the 101, this looks like a sheet of Dukies. No, it looks like condoms. Like condoms.

Like condoms when they used to come in the sheet. It looks like shit condoms that they sell in Germany at the clubs. It's all natural. RFK doesn't want us putting color and stuff. Pretty good, right? I mean, it's health food. You don't like it? I don't want to chew because they'll get mad of me.

Oh. The verdict? Love it. They're good, right? Yeah. Oh, my God. I'll take half of those. Yeah.

I tried it last night. It's Body of Christ. Body of Christ. I just love it. There could be, oh my God, this could be so much. You could have a lot of fun with these. A lot of fun with these. I was just in shock.

Body of Christ. You could do communion role play. You could also do, um, um, barely any sugars. Coins over the eyes. All natural. All the ingredients are just fruit. Yeah. Anyway, you know, thrive market.

I don't know. Not enough in here. Well, they're 50 calories. They're for people trying to, you know, kind of, snack on the safe side. And you know, for somebody like me, I'm going to be snacking. So this is needle exchange. This is harm reduction. This is just anything to keep me off the streets. You know what I mean? Because when I take that edible and walk into my kitchen, it's, it's a wrap. It's, I want the world. I want the whole world. He's got the whole kitchen in his mouth. It's Willie Wonka,

if it was Gene Wilder, and it was only one child and that child was a fat kind. That's That's me snacking. Okay. You don't make a lot of snackerfices in your life, do you? Girl, I'd be snackrificing left and right. Okay. Wait, wait, wait. I got to tell you about something.

I got to tell you about something. I got to tell you about something that I love. Okay. It's a movie. Have you seen Predator Badlands? I hope. Did we didn't talk about this, please? Predator Badlands.

Predator? So, Predator, you're familiar with the Predator franchise? Oh. I'm trapped. Wait. What is she say when she's like, I'm empty inside. Wait, no, something, I don't feel good. Oh, yeah, I don't feel good.

Yeah, it's like, I'm empty inside. I'm a husk. I can't feel my hands. Yeah, yeah. Oh, it's like men are from Mars, women are from, whatever, who cares. Okay. Oh, yeah, men are from Mars and women are from Vetus. I don't feel good.

Yeah. Men are from Mars and women want their penis. I don't, am I right? I don't feel good or something like that. That's what it is. Yes. She's so damn. She's really great.

Again, I'm going to say it. Again, say it again. If you haven't watched any of her specials, go do it now. Especially Roadshow. Just look it up on iTunes or Spotify or whatever. And you will get your life. She came to one of my shows at Ireland or something. It was my first show back after COVID.

Hadn't been in drag on stage since beginning of COVID. Because I didn't do, I didn't do car stand up. Remember when all the comics were at the parking lots? Well, we saw that drag show. Do you know what I think it was probably like? It was probably like doing a show for like Stephen King, Christine. Like all these cars as people. Pixar cars?

Do you know what I mean? I don't. The cars were the people in the audience. And I think when there was laughter, they flashed the lights or hung out the horns. I don't know what they did. They weren't on the roofs of the car. They were inside the car.

They were in the cars. No, that's not for me. I'm not good. I've been to a drive-in. I went to a double feature of Silence of Lambs and then Red Dragon. Oh. And I saw Alaska there.

This was like a few years ago. And I learned that sitting in a car wasn't for me. Well, it depends on what kind. kind of car you got. Because we can sit at home. We sure can. But then you're not part of, you're part of an outside automotive community. But we're not outside the car. And also, like, we're in, is this pleasant villain? We're necking. Yeah. You got to have someone in neck. You got to have tons of snacks in the trunk. You got to have like a huge bottle of whiskey.

And then you got to like, you got to do some crime. Right. And it was a huge line for food. And that, that really is hard for me too. Mama, you would load up that trunk with snacks. I want to cut the line at any food place. and turn to the whole line and go, I'm hungry. Yeah. Like, if I don't eat, I'll die. Right. Do you want blood in your hands?

Went to my rheumatologist yesterday. She goes, I gained a little weight. And I hadn't. Remind me what rheumatology is again. I think it's the study of like immune systems. Oh, okay. I think. I don't know.

It's not awful. I go to see her all the time. Don't even know what she does. Autoimmune conditions. Like arthritis. I got. She's like, you put on a little weight. I was like,

But she was like, I feel like when you, she was like, then you start out? She was like, you were like 170? And I was like, yeah,

when I first came here when I was like very ill. Yeah, yeah. And then time has elapsed and I've gotten a little better. Yeah, now you look healthy.

She didn't mean it shady. No, of course not. But my ears can't hear that. Right. What's the, what's the, what's the unalive version of that?

Like you don't say kill you say unolive. You fat. So you're less light. So, so you blow up, you fatty. No, no,

no, Oh, I see what you mean. So you're less small? No. What's like the euphemism? Oh, gosh. So, I don't know. It's like, so there were pounds that were added.

So things are different now. Things are different now. Yeah. So experimenting with a different shape. Right. Yeah. You're kind of one of those suitcases where there's that second zipper where it can expand. That's me, baby.

Do you know the good year blimp? Yeah. That's kind of like you. No. Do you really feel like, well, I mean. No. No. I think you look great, but that doesn't... Thank you. That's not what I was fishing for.

That's all that matters. 2026. We're not going to have adversarial relationships with our own bodies. Get over it. Not get over it, but... Get over it. Yeah, get over it. Stop the insanity. Get over it. Grease up a watermelon. Throw it in the pool. Same as the deers. Okay, predators. Mary.

What's going on? Andrew's best friend, El Fanning. So this motherfucker. this bitch, this woman, excuse me, this lovely young lady, she yanked this off so bad. So the movie takes place, it stars a predator. So it's the first kind of like one of these movies that takes, like the main character is an actual predator, he's not the villain.

So it starts off on the predator's planet, crazy things going on like the dad is trying to, the brother's trying to kill him. And because they call their weak, so they fight and they, you know, if you're weak, you get killed. Oh, yeah. Vicious. Is this like part of the Predator franchise?

Mm-hmm. Okay, I watched the Native American one. Prey. I watched that. Yeah. Do you love it? I loved it. I loved it.

I had no idea it was going to be a Predator movie. Yeah, me neither. This is the same director, I think. Yeah. Could you look in the camera and say that you love Predator? I love Predators, especially the movies, not sexual. So anyways, the, Mary, the world building, the VFX, like,

and Elf An Elf Anfanning plays a synthetic robot. Queen. I fucking love Elfanning, though. Girl, Ms. Fanning takes this role and she just wraps it around everybody's testes until they turn blue and then she kicks them. I'm so fucking wet for her in Hunger Games. She's playing a young Effie Trinket. Fabulous.

We'll get this. Why have one? We can have two twice the price. She plays two cents in this one. Thea and Tessa. And one of them is the first one. She's only got half a body, a torso, for most of the first part of the movie.

And the predator carries her around, like a backpack. Conti. Because she knows how to, like, he crashed lands on this planet that is so fucking dangerous. Mary, it's so stressful. Every moment, someone's trying to kill him. It's called Predator. How do I look it up at home?

Predator, what? Predator Badlands. Badlands. Okay, I'm going to watch it. Mary, it is pulse-pounding action from start to finish. And I cried. Oh, great. Once we get into, because Thea, so her name is Thea, the synth.

And El Fending is like, oh, you know, Tessa, she's going to come back for me. Or she's hoping she's not dead. But she gets reprogrammed and she turns a little evil. And, ooh, girl, she, like, does the parent trap acting with herself thing. And it's Kunti. I can't believe that. This is how you know I'm not a real actor. She's, what do you mean?

What? Like, when people play a twin and talk to themselves, the way I could never. I can barely learn lines for one person. You absolutely could. You just do Swedish. Oh my God, one of my dreams, remember when we were doing Trixing Cadill Live, one of my dreams was to do a swap night where we do each other's parts. Could we try it right now?

No, I don't remember any of it. I don't think I do either. Yeah. No, I'd be like, well, we're doing a good job already. No, no, no, no, no. Hello! Killed it Really killed it

That's you at the beginning Yeah that is me Yes Welcome to the Trixie and Katia Something something spectacular Oh and then somebody Then you get the card Oh gosh

Welcome to the poopie and the peepie in the cup Yeah It's sad Hasbens We're husbands Never worse They gotta keep us off the road I just listen to this pod

Our pod today And I was saying I miss doing that tour And everyone in this room booed me We booed you out of the road I was in the car going, shut up. Like I was like, what are you talking about? She's having a food.

Faggot, sit in your chair, talk to your friend and go home. Faggett. Put your fucking lobster bib mom and just crack those shells. The plastic lobster bibs. I say, let's get crack in. That's sick. And you know what they'd be calling crayfish? Mudbugs.

Is that right? Mudbugs. Cudadds. Cudad buds. I think in the South they call them mudbugs. That's disgusting. That is truly vile. Well, they should call them lobsters.

They should call them, um, um, Water rats. Do you like, you know, even living in Boston, you didn't do like... No. I mean, I tried.

Do you like shrimp? Nope. I don't like any seafood. Seafood is sick. I think seafood is mostly disgusting. I will fuck with a lovely prepared salmon though. And also, how much of the world is water?

Leave them alone. We don't need to be eating them. Maybe, wait, is that xenophobic? It's not xenophobic. It's just that many, many cultures do,

like, rely, you know, I live in countries and stuff. But also, I'm a vegetarian. So I'm like, leave all the animals alone. Yeah. Eat the fruit, the fruit leather.

Give me those brown dots. Give me my brown dots. Can I tell you, this is exact size and color of my nipple. Can I have, like, a hundred percent? You want to like avoid censorship? Under your brown dress, your sheer brown dress when you go to the Golden Globes. Thank you. Yeah.

Oh my God. Yesterday we filmed a video for my YouTube channel where we look at all your drag looks from Drag race. Really educational. Really fun. Did you get my little note? Yes, I did. Okay.

I noticed this through line. I said, we didn't Alaska do something where she had words being spelled out on her. That was. On Drag Race? No. What do you mean? Like in the work run? Wasn't she doing like one letter a day?

Yes. Yes, yes, she was. Her name. Oh. Her name. Oh. Just in case you forget it. I don't know.

Right. She had a lot. She was very, yeah. Anyways. Well, the truth is she's unforgettable. Who would forgettable? Alaska. Certainly nobody who was on that season, I'll tell you that much. And also, I was, when I was thinking about you doing that critique, I was like, oh, man, I was like,

what's my worst, what's my least favorite outfit? I was like, oh, there are some real stinkers. Yeah, it's like half and half. We talked about it in the video. It's half and it's possible to critique this drag and really like that person's drag and like them and think they're amazing. We can talk about these clothes explicitly and that's okay. Of course. H&M Prairie dresses with black jelly sandals. Let's talk about it. Oh, but see, that I love as a performance outfit. That wasn't a runway outfit.

You know, that was like a cherry, that was a cherry bond outfit? Yeah. Yeah. I wouldn't count that as a look. I wouldn't count it as a look either. Honestly. I mean, the way I was able to dodge so many bullets. Well, I mean, my future drag, horrible.

My Princess Diana rotten. And your final look, crazy. Oh, just so bad. You know, I would have done my future of drag when if I had, oh, I really, really know what I would do. I really know what I would do, gal. I really know. Let's take a break. I'm heading to Phoenix for a gig, and while half the country is slipping on ice and shoveling driveways,

I'm packing sunglasses and a bikini. That Phoenix sunshine just hits different, especially when you booked an amazing house on Airbnb. I'm talking morning walks and short sleeves, coffee outside on a patio, squeezing in hikes through saguaro cacti, and alfresco dinners because the weather in Arizona wants you to live your life outside, rather than huddling next to the radiator as the sky outside is gray and lifeless. I booked to stay through Airbnb and honestly, it's going to make the whole trip so much better. I'm going to have room to spread out, a real living room to hang in, and a table where I can

actually sit down and eat instead of juggling a to-go container on a lumpy bed. I can shut the door when I need quiet, open things up when I want light, and enjoy actual privacy that feels like my own place. And if I'm traveling with my crew, we can actually all stay together to make the entire event smoother. And while I'm soaking up the sun in Phoenix, I'm already planning the next trip this summer to the Amalfi Coast. We're talking fresh seafood caught that morning, long days on the beach that melt into even longer nights, and hopefully a fling with a dark here at Adonis named Antonio. trips just hit different when you book a home on Airbnb, and I already know I'll be booking my next day through Airbnb

again and again and again. With Airbnb, every journey feels like it's being written just for you. My winter retreat to a secluded chalet in Quebec's Chalvoix region was the perfect way to ring in the new year. The chalet had a beautiful deck opening to a view of the frosted evergreens as we grilled in the wintry air and toasted the arrival of 2026. There was even a hot tub outside underneath a canopy, trees where we'd relax for hours and talk about our goals and expectations for what lies ahead.

The entire trip felt like wandering inside a snow globe and staying in this gorgeous home I booked on Airbnb was the pause that I didn't know I needed. We spent our days snowshoeing through birch forests and taking in the sights along the St. Lawrence River as the snow glowed beneath the afternoon sunshine. Somewhere in that hush, it struck me. My home is sitting empty. Why not hosted on Airbnb while I'm away? Especially since my next spring adventure, is a trip to Spain for two weeks, where I plan to buzz along volcanic cliffs in a tiny Renault, stopping for Papasaragudas, and fresh island seafood. Hosting is really about making small dreams at home possible, like finally updating my hardwood floors.

A little extra income from hosting could help me get there. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca.com. I would really do a nice job. Okay. It would be like... Next time. When you do Canada versus Kuwait or whatever they're doing now, like...

Laos versus Bangladesh. Or like Cleveland versus Pittsburgh or whatever. Siberia versus Paduca versus the world. Kamchatka versus like... They need to rebrand that. We don't need to be encouraging international conflict in this our year 2026. Thank you very much. Why can we work together for...

We're already doing USA versus the world. In the world. Thank you. Thank you. How about USA plus the world? inclusive. Thank you. How about USA loves the world?

Love it. If you can't love the USA, how are you going to love the world? Now drive that down to Theorucci Boulevard. Yeah. What was your favorite look of mine? Oh, well, you have to watch the video and find out. I'm not going to watch it.

I don't have YouTube premium anymore. Oh, I mean, there was some great ones. Honestly, dear Reger wrote you look. I was like, this is peak Katia. It's like a lot of coverage. The body looks great. We could have been a little fuller, of course. Yeah, but after the Brooke Hogan wig, after seeing a black finger wave wig three times, I was just happy that we were kind of expanding up and outward.

And those vanity laces sure did. They, oh man, that drag race lighting in those vanity laces. Oh, yeah. But I really liked my, I borrowed a lot of shit. I really liked my. Like space the fit. Shut up. I really liked my, like, very, I know it's kind of casual for a look, but like the 80s jacket with the shorts.

and the things for the stand-up comedy challenge I thought it was really pretty I thought it was really pretty I thought it was the necklace Oh I don't remember the necklace I was like wearing long hair with a full collar with the necklace We have no neck

I would have loved more of like just a I don't remember the necklace But The necklace The necklace The only thing Are you watching Wait one one less thing

I love the muclear look The only thing I really regret not doing is attaching the stirrups underneath Oh sure That was a big that's all I see when I look at that look now. The baggy pants, because they should be a little more,

not so baggy, you know what I mean? For the muggler. Yeah. For the muggler. God, I love that look. I felt so pussy. I knew it was so ugly. And Rupal's like, this is so wrong.

It's so ugly. It's great. Anyways, enough about me. Enough about you. What kind of shirt you got on today? Oh, I just shoved a nuke up my pussy. Yeah. Maybe a little too.

On the nose, considering current events. Oh. But listen, I volunteer his tribute. If we're going to go into World War III with nuclear weapons, shove one right up in this pussy. It could happen. Are you watching Fallout? I already watched it.

I watched it years ago. Well, it's season two now. So it's a series and so it continues. Get the fuck out. Why did you tell me? We're on like episode five. But I've been replaying. Wait, da, da, da, da, da, da, do.

Hold on. Tell me how does it begin. Because I know where it left off. Okay. So it starts with those same people, kind of continuing the story from season one. Okay. Could you be more specific? But they're going to New Vegas.

Can you be more specific? They're going to New Vegas. Okay. Which is like basically, spoiler. In the second season, they find out that like there was enough power in Vegas that when the bombs dropped, Vegas was protected. So the person who was rich enough to basically control Vegas, protected Vegas. And Vegas is now like this thriving economy of like,

building still standing and stuff. Fierce. And so they're going there because ultimately they're looking for the ghoul, looking for his wife and his son. Of course. Daughter. Daughter. Yeah.

So I'm still not sure what's going to happen. I mean, I'm playing, replaying Fallout 4. I've played like three times. And I played New Vegas three times. I played Fall Out of Six. Twelve times.

Fall Out of three twice. But Fallout 4 is in Boston, which I love. Oh, really? It's so Boston. There's a Boston Commons. Oh, my God. Is the Public Gardens?

Is there Bay Village? Yes, all of it. Is there the Zakembridge? Lexington. Lexington? Isn't there Lexington in Boston? That's the suburb. It's not Boston, but yeah.

Oh, yes. And some of it, it's like, let's say it's not the Wang Theater. It'll be like the Wing Theater. Like, for copyright reasons, I think it's not the same thing. The Ernie Bonk Jr. Yeah. And the neighborhoods are all abbreviated, obviously. But like it looks so much like Boston.

It's crazy. And I'm playing through it. And I have a really hard time. I know that video games are fake. I know these people aren't real. But in any game where you could be bad or good, I can't be bad. I can't shoot and kill people. I'm always trying to minimize.

I'm such a me in the game. I'm trying to like, can't we all just de-escalate the situation where I, like... I feel like that's wonderful. But I feel like you should play video games and be a whole new person. Like, you could be really sweet in the real world and then be like... Oh, yeah. Do you exercise all your... My aggression.

Yeah. You know? I do that in the car. By running people over. Right. No, no, no. I mean, that's a really good point. Do you think that it's, I don't think.

I have a hard time. I like, we'll turn off the game and feel bad about who I killed in the game. What is that? I don't think it's a very, I don't think it's a probably, my guess, not an effective way to cope with aggression. Not a good outlet. No. I mean, I think for me it satiates the feeling of like, finishing a game always feels like finishing a puzzle. Yeah.

I'm slowly putting something back in order. I love that. And in the game, I forgot about this. But in the beginning of the game, there's no nuclear blast. And then the bombs are coming. So you run to a shelter. You and your wife and your wife with your baby. You go to your pods to go to sleep.

No gay. You can be the girl and have a husband, but no gay. Because they have a baby. How would they have a baby? Woke. Thanks, woke. Back in my day, it was me, it was we and she. What is it?

Me and she? It was we, she and Kathy Lee. Yep. None of this. What does mistress call it? None of this he, she, we be. I don't know. Hishi, we the day them vegetarians. That's what she says.

So the game starts with you going into your sleep pod to wait for after the blast. Okay. And then you wake up early and your wife's pod gets snatched, show, but you get shot point blank and they steal your baby. So the whole game is you trying to find your baby. My baby. My baby. They shot my wife and took my baby? And one of the things they talk about in the game is,

shot my wife and took my baby. So one of the factions, right, in these games is like all these different people you can help or not help or whatever. This is an ethical question. In the game, synths, which are like fake people, not fake people, robots that are so realistic that they don't even know that they're fake. Yeah. That's the same in the name. But they're not born, but they're synthetic people, like built so real. Yeah, yeah.

In the game, it's like the ethics of like, are these machines, are they people? Do we have a right to abduct them away their memory, et cetera? No, they're not. They're not people. I guess I would be some person who's like, don't talk down to my air fryer. I guess I like have too much. Well, I don't think that, I think that, so for example, if my mom in a synth or in a burning building, I'm getting the sin. Yeah.

No, but like. But what if your mom's a synth? My mom is not a synth. But in this world, what if she is? Oh, no, no, no. Okay. So that's not possible in this world. What if you are? What if you found out you were?

Oh, well, then that's different. Would you want people to, like, abduct you and wipe your brain? Or would you want... Would you feel like, hey, because I feel like I'm a person, I have rights? Well, that's a different... I thought you were talking about how we view the other as a synth, but you're talking about if you become aware, because these sins don't even...

They're so realistic. They don't even know that they're robots. Well, then that's a whole... That's another fun. That's conundrum. Like, people are getting abducted, let's say, by the institute, it's called. They're abducting you because let's say they want to use your body for science.

For sex. No. And they replace you with a version of you so real that no one knows. And you yourself, the synth of you, thinks it's been you the whole time. It's like that Infinity Pool movie. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I think, well, whatever, real or not, I'm not graping that synth. I'm not beating that synth up.

I'm taking that synth to a nice steak dinner. Right. Maybe I have to eat the whole thing. Maybe she doesn't eat anything. I'm getting some Martinelli's and we're going to go home and watch. She's going to get some Castro Sintech Motor Oil in a nice little martini glass. I'll have a virgin daquery

and then, you know. Right. You got to watch Predator Badlands. I'm going to watch it. You got to catch up on Fallout then. Are you kidding me? I'm going to go fucking go going out to that shit tonight. Well, I'm going, my arthritis has been really bad. So I've been playing real quick six to eight hours a night. The video games probably.

Real like a crazy person. Wait, wait, is that bad? I mean, I would. Imagine maybe like... I mean, if I exercise first in the morning and I work all day, I'm like, who cares what I do? If you late and watch TV for eight hours, no one would say anything. But if you play video games for eight hours, people act like you're crazy.

I disagree. That's an active activity. I think it's... I think sometimes TV movies is boring. I mean, I agree. I don't think video games are the same thing as TV as at all. Right. Because you're like literally, actively, you're playing a game.

Yeah. You're not just... And you're not in your phone. You're not on your phone. That's the one thing about video games that I really, really, really love. You can't be on your phone and play a video game. Yeah. I mean, you could play a video game on your phone.

I'm never on my phone. Honestly. Mary. Something bad happened to me. Where I just don't use phones anymore. 2026 is about not going on X anymore. And I'm not talking about Twitter because I'm finally reconciled the fact that it is X. Right.

Because the past few days I've gone on there, these porn. No. no, no, no. The the posts that I've seen are targeted ads. No, no. It's just, it's either vile absurdity. Me. Like throbbing

boner eroticism, you. No, no. No, like, it's just a bunch of shit makes me depressed. Right. It's stupid. It's not like world events that keep me up to date. It's like shitty people doing shitty things, stupid people posting stupid crap. Stuff that's not

true. Stuff that's outdated. it's all bullshit and it makes me so depressed. Right. And that's what I honestly have been kind of grappling with. You and I are tech, I mean, are we, are we, are we content creators? I guess we are. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I am at least.

But you're, that's one of your jobs. But lately, I found it a lot easier if I was like on the internet all day to, I don't know, like lately I put the phone down to look at it all day. Yeah. Forget to post for days at a time. Don't post anything. I'm living life. Yeah.

I don't want to know about the David Beckham, the Romeo Beckham and Nicola thing feud, but I do. And I'm like, and I have opinions about it. And I don't want to have opinions about it. You know, I don't want to,

like, it's stupid crap like that. Right. You know, we're like, it's just taking up space where I could literally have just looked out at, at the sunset or like literally just jerked off.

Right. Honestly. anything. The secret to Charlotte Cardin's captivating eyes? Panorama mascara by L'Oreal Paris. The multi-level bristle brush catches every lash from inner to outer corner. For panoramic volume with lashes that are so fanned out, eyes appear one point four times bigger. See life in panorama because you're worth it. Shop L'Oreal Paris Panorama mascara on Amazon now. Did you know that Staples professional can tailor a custom program to make running your business easy. With a Staples Professional account, you get one vendor,

one delivery, and one invoice for all your must-haves, from tech to cleaning supplies, and dedicated support from Staples experts who guide you on everything, from product selection and ordering to payment. Join today at staplesprofessional.ca and get expert solutions tailored to your business. That was easy. At Medcan, we know that life's greatest moments are built on a foundation of good health, from the big milestones to the quiet winds. That's why our annual health assessment offers a physician-led, full-body checkup that provides a clear picture of your health today and may uncover early signs of conditions like heart disease and cancer.

The healthier you means more moments to cherish. Take control of your well-being and book an assessment today. Medcan. Live well for life. Visit medcan.com.com slash moments to get started. Do you like how I'm like, oh, I'm not looking at my, I'm not going to my, I'm not going my phone anymore. I'm living my real life eight hours of video game playing. I'm, I don't think that's bad. Sorry.

I think it's fun. If it's fun, if it makes you happy, just like Ms. Crow. You don't know. The me that I am now wants to play video games. Cook my own dinner. Last night I made some delicious delicious rice with some

vegetables that I cooked in a pan. Bears. The can of soup. You better do it, bitch. I loved it. You know what I did? I performatively ate another salad in my kitchen, mugging out to 360. To who? Just, you know.

To everyone. To the black mold. Yes. I put it in a giant. I don't got bowls big enough for the salad I like. Mama, because when I eat a salad. A slop bucket. Rough edge.

There's only three ingredients. The baby, arugula, whatever, spring mix. You know, like the pre-made stuff. And then there's about 600 pounds of croutes. and then a half a gallon of dressing. Right. And I have to take my shirt off because it gets real messy.

And I just start using my hands. The dressing is the issue. When I worked in the restaurants and people get these salads with... But it's bossom and a good. That's 80% ranch. I said, do you pretty go lay down somewhere, you fucking creature? Yeah, you're about to blow ass on the way home. No, the...

I love it, the ranch? Can I have extra ranch? When I was serving, when people asked for extra ranch, I almost said... And I knew you were going to ask for it. Because I knew you were that type of fucking person. You're fucking weird girl. It's a... The lettuce is not put on the soup.

It's not soup. It's not soup. Oh, I see what you mean. It's not ranch soup with two lettuce leaves. Faggot. Do you mean like... See, one more ranch? Here's your ranch, faggot.

No, no, no. I don't do that. I do balsamic vinaigrette. And just a little. I don't want wet. Not sopping wet salad, right? You like sopping wet. Well, because there's so much crunch with my crouton.

Love the crudence. I love the, oh, man. I just the other day, Had no salad Did a bowl of croutons I swear to God I did a whole bowl of croutons With them solid dressing

It ate with my fingers And I was in hot Is that keto? That's keto It's neato It's neatoh You know you can make your own croutons Yes

I actually have But they were big and kind of You know You bake It's like a little garlic bread That you bake Mm-hmm Stop it's

But also I've been Putting saline in your ball I want to make a confession. What? I was supposed to go get this thing done, and I'm so glad I didn't. What are you talking about? You're going to laugh. I'm going to be so embarrassed.

But I'm not... I'm not going to embarrass you. I'm not going to... No, I'm going to embarrass myself. Shame is a landfill emotion. It was a procedure called Bo Cox. Like, whatever it does, the name is an instant, though. Like, it's an instant.

But whatever it does, sure. The name is an instant note. I was watching a show that was like commonly asked questions about this group of people, right? I forget what it was called. But it was an episode with deaf people and deaf people were talking like people were asking questions they've been afraid to ask. And this person said, what's one of the barriers of being like a non-hearing person? And this guy was like, Botox. He was like so much of what we read is like lips and emotions.

It's like people who look like they're standing in headlights and their mouth. is just moving and I can't tell how they feel about what they're saying. Interesting. I was like, oh. Interesting. Because, you know, people when they're using ASL a lot of times, it's expressive. Yeah, sure, sure, sure. So they were like, I can tell what they're saying, but I can't tell how they feel about it. The deaf must hate Nicole Kidman. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. Just kidding. Love you. Love you, Nicole. No. She truly is the Baldwin and beautiful. I love her so much. I love Winnet the Palchro too. I love Julia Roberts.

Right. Did you, you didn't watch the Grammy. I'm not the Greenmys. You didn't see the Golden Globes. No. I don't like award shows. I know. I don't either. But Julie Roberts got a standing ovation just for being yourself. I know I said that last episode.

Sorry. It's okay. Well, we were nominated for an Audi. We were nominated for a Golden Globe. Amy took the... Ambie. We nominated for an Ambie Award. It's the podcasting awards.

What does it stand for? It's audio content, I believe. Best Comedy Pod for an Ambie. Congratulations. And you know, after that whole Golden Globe fiasco where we didn't get an award even though we were nominated, I think that somebody better give us something.

Yeah, it's something better. Somebody better not give me something. something in my dick called Bocax. Let me tell you what is it. So basically it's like it is a, what it does is kind of like makes your dick like bigger and thicker and like also harder. Kind of like gives your, gives you like a makes your dick harder and bigger. Did Andrew put you on this?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is the company you keep. No, no, no, no, no, no, I swear to God. I swear to God. I swear to God. Some of the sober people did to go back. the pooky. Because, no, no, no.

They just need to go running. They just need to go macramet. Pottery. You know what I mean? Flower arrangement. Anything. A parasailing. Right.

Free climbing. Normal sailing. So wait, wait. So it's an injection and then you got a pump. I got it by a penis pump. And I had the appointment schedule for one o'clock yesterday. What's the goal? Oh, like a, so I take like Viagra quite often.

You know? I don't have like erectile dysfunction per se But like I just When I fuck people I love to take It's like I have my little My little red shoes on when I go on stage You know what I mean?

My little tap shoes I'm doing my tap dance Right You know Like a woman wear makeup for other women It's like I'm a shepherd Where's my little bonnet and my staff Right

You know what I mean? Right A little bo-peep Right So anyways I Mr. Potatoe Have without the shoes

It's just a potato Thank you Always saying that So it basically, it's like, you know, it helps with, it gives you a hard big dick. Right. And you're like, you like this dick and they go and they look up at you. And it's just those ice blue eyes with the bloodshot whites. And you said, are you ready to do this?

Looking truly like Freddie Kruger veins up in the eyes. No, but this would, I wouldn't be taken by Agra. Or generic. You know what I mean? Or yeah, whatever. Yeah. Anyways. So I did not want to do it.

because I felt it was insane. Right. And it was also quite expensive. But apparently it's effective. Right. Isn't needles and the penis, isn't there some risks to that? No.

None, of course. Right. But this is a doctor. Right. It's not like, you know, it's not a Dr. Bob from Florida. Right. This is an actual. Miss Orlando.

Yeah. This is not like go down to the, go to an alley and take, you know, jump over the puddle and go, go, me down under the grate. I need the opposite. I wish I could bake my dick like a shrinky dink sometimes. Too flopped out. You, okay.

It's too flopped out. You wish you could what? Bake it like a shrinky dink because it's too flopped out. That sounds like a wonderful t-shirt. Right. Why don't you bake it like a shrinky dink? Because you are too flopped out, you bitch. You faggity bitch.

Too flopped out. I still don't even understand what you're talking about. It's more for me. Okay. Just what I said And I don't know what it means Yeah Flipped out

Flopped out That's flopped out That's flopped out And you need to What is it? You need to bake it like I need to bake it like a shrinky ding Because it's too flopped out

All right Tard of wearing a holster Like it's a gun Thank you I've been having the only breakfast As of late What's the tea? It's that fucking steel cut oatmeal

The baby I have like a The bowl is so huge huge and it's so nourishing. Do you eat it cold? No. I heat it up on the stove. I cook a whole batch for the week. And then I'd take a huge fucking clump of it.

Put it in the pot. Heavy, not heavy cream. Like cream. Fucking, you know, heat that shit up so it's nice and hot. Right. Walnuts, cranberries, blueberries, chia seeds, brown sugar. Chilula. Chilula.

A1. Right. And then mayonnaise. For sure. Do you like mayonnaise? I hate it. I will never eat it. I don't care for it either.

I don't like mayonnaise. I don't like cream sauce. I don't like ranch. I don't like any like French food. Like Alfredo. None of that. Ranch is sick. Rinch is disgusting.

Blue cheese is also so gross. In zombie movies where they're trying to see people are infected and they like scan them and it's like infected. I want to do that with people who have had ranch. Just in general. Oh, looks like you had ranch once. You gotta go. That's still a no. I only like like a light lemony,

vinegar or like a very light balsamette. Even like, Mary, even a little oil and salt and pepper. Oil, salt and pepper. You gotta start making your own dressing. That's where it's at. I have. It's the move. Because bitch.

It's the move. It makes the bottle shit look gross. Sweetie, I had my, um, my fucking art teacher in Boston. Her husband is a fucking vine. Uh, owns a goddamn. you call it a fucking olive. A steak escape? No, an olive farm or whatever. Oh. They make through an olive oil

is what I'm trying to say. A vineyard. Yes. Yeah. I thought it was like, is that what's called? I don't know. I think so. Anyways, so this incredible olive oil and then they get these like 50, you know, 50 year old bottles of fucking balsamic vinegar. You just fucking mix that shit together.

A little salt and pepper. Oh! Yeah. On a toasted baguette. I'd be doing like, what is it? It's like olive oil. Lemon or lime from the yard, salt and pepper. And then like a tiny amount of djean. What about a little Mrs. Dash? I never had that.

She's nice. Never had that. The other day, can I tell you what I made? I've been really into cooking. The other day, I was at a function and I ate a pizza bagel, pizza bite. I haven't had one in so long. You know the kind that you put in the oven? The little one.

And pizza's on a bagel, you can get a hockey puck of death. It's so sick. Why was that at a party? Those are so gross. It was what was being offered for breakfast. I'll tell you more in the next episode. Well, it was a good teaser. But I went home and I was like, that wasn't good.

But it awakened part of me that wanted a good. And I felt like that woman was like, my children wanted corn flakes this morning. Like, so instead of me, because instead of corned 11, I put pizza ingredients on a storebot, a storebought bagel. And that was me making cornflakes from scratch. My children wanted cornflakes. So I walked to Iowa. My gay friends Jonathan and Jonathan really wanted pizza bagels.

So, girl, I got the bagels. So brushed on the oil and the butter and the Italian seasoning. Then the stunning pizza sauce, the Ches. Oh, the Ches. And then chopped up red peppers and tomatoes. Put it in the oven. You broil that shit? You broil it for the last couple minutes.

400 degrees? And then you boil it. It was great. It was really great. I'm so happy. Honestly, I was like, pizza bagels aren't good enough to not do this. Pizza bites, are they called pizza bites? I'm not sure.

Bagel bites, they're just not good enough to not do the real thing. And I love you bagel bites, and you can send free bagel bites. And bagel bites, I don't like you, so you can fuck off. Right. Do you, you know what I used to love in high school? What? Tostino pizza rolls. The cheese ones.

Oh my God. They're doing what the bagel bites should have did at the gig with the girls. So I don't know what those are toasty. So these little squares. And you can microwave them more. or put them in the oven and they get hot. And the outside is almost like a pie crust tortilla really flat. Okay.

A little pouch. Imagine like a little pouch, like a pillow. Like a pouch? Yes. And on the inside is the cheese and the sauce from the pizza. It's bites of pizza, pizza bites. Gotcha. It's great.

I don't know if it's high nutrition. Probably not. And you know what that's... Is it the same kind of cheese like mozzarella cheese? Yeah. It is. Yeah. And that's Susan Powder documentary.

When she said, don't eat any food you can't spell. I kind of like, you know what? She's fucking right. How do you spell? Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah. I'm a really good speller, though. My diarrhea all the time. Boop. Why do you have diarrhea? I don't know. Are you really have diarrhea? I mean, I wish I was constipated.

Right. No, you don't. No, I don't. Of course not. But I like it every time we want to get like a little rabbit pellet, poops. I love that. It's a nice change. I think we're good.

I think we're good. We're good. Wait, so, wait, final thoughts. Watch Predator Badly. I'm going to watch Fallout Season 2. Right. And then we're both going to watch primate at the movies together. I'm not going to the movies.

You're out of your mind. You're out of your mind. You're out of your mind. I weirdly can't bring myself to watch Wicked for Good. I watched the first one. Bob the Drag Queen told me if I didn't cry watching Wicked that something's wrong with me. That is patently.

That is patently untrue. That is not true. I cried because I... No. It's... What? Wicked. No.

Okay, anyways. Okay. But please go out. Okay, I will. I will. Bye. You know.