The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya - IMHO's Darby and Alexis Summon Charcuterie Spirits with Trixie

Episode Date: May 12, 2026

The city of Burbank was sweating secrets, and somewhere beneath the flicker of a dying neon sign, IMHO: The Podcast's Darby Lynn Cartwright & Alexis Bevels were cooking up a scheme with Katya’s name written all over it. Their plan was simple, dirty, and dressed in bad lighting: remove Katya from the equation and slide into The Bald and the Beautiful like two dames with alibis and microphones. Trixie, alone in the studio, never saw the plot curling through the room like cigarette smoke in a cheap motel lobby. Friendships are questioned, loyalties are lipstick-stained, and everyone’s wondering who really belongs under that Bald and Beautiful tinseltown spotlight. Check out Darby & Alexis' YouTube show and podcast: IMHO: The Show: https://www.youtube.com/c/IMHOTheShow IMHO: The Podcast: https://bit.ly/InMyHomosexualOpinion Darby IG: @darbylynncartwright Alexis IG: @alexisbevels To see if you’re eligible for the new GLP-1 pill on Ro, go to: https://Ro.co/BALD To learn more and check out Yahoo Mail, now with planner, head to: ⁠https://mail.yahoo.com/overview/plan-smarter Need a website or domain? Head to Squarespace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain at: https://Squarespace.com/BALD Bath & Body Works candles not only smell amazing, but are crafted with premium, lead-free wicks for a clean, safe burn. Shop the White Barn Neutrals collection now at ⁠⁠https://bathandbodyworks.com⁠⁠ If you're struggling with OCD or unrelenting intrusive thoughts, NOCD can help. Book a free 15 minute call to get started at: https://learn.nocd.com/BALD Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch the podcast on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemotel.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Listen and Watch Anywhere! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow Trixie: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemattel.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   Follow Katya: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.welovekatya.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/welovekatya⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   #TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hi, it's Trixie and I'm here with the I-M-H-O in my homosexual opinion girls. Would you like to say who you are? Oh my God. Hi, I'm Darby. And that's another one. We're here promoting the fact that we're here. It's so good to see you again. Oh my God. We have tea from back in the day. We have tea from today. Tea from yesterday. We have hospital stories. We have live show set stories. And we're going to give it all. Wow. Wait a minute. I'm screeching. Is this yours? Are you for real right now? Are you for real right now? Okay. So what is this?

Your lip gloss? It has to it for now. I'm trying. Okay. I'm allergic to talc. I'm allergic to talc. Oh, talc is in everything. Right.

So what are we talking? Are we recording? We've been recording. I'm allergic to talc. We've been recording. I'm allergic to talc. I'm going to change my drag name to talc. You know,

talc is being reformulated out of a lot of products. And the problem is it does have a lot of like sweat, sweat-sucking properties that I do like, but I know that it, you know, I know why they're removing it. Because I'm allergic to it. I worked for two years at a makeup store, Nigels. I saw you there.

Oh my God, you worked at this, Nigels? I worked at that, Nigels. Oh, yeah, yeah. So mean. I didn't like it. And I wasn't on SSRIs yet. Now I am. I've never been happier.

Oh. But the problem is they're taking out all the towel. And she's a Republican. Who? Sorry, what? The mom from Wizards of Warwick. Waverly Place. Oh yeah. She's in God's not dead too. Anyway, they're taking out all the talcs and all the stuff that makes the Michael blast for a long time and then people are saying, this didn't last very long.

And I'm like, I know, because talc has, I believe, like, it sucks up oil and also has some binding properties to it. And they're removing it because I think they're deciding it's not a, you know, I don't know. Bravo, bra bra, bra, bra, I don't know. I don't know what they're doing at Nigels. I don't know anything about what they're doing over there at the talc factory. But I do know that our guest today are drag icons, hilarious comedians and two divas who have incredible homosexual opinions. Please welcome to the bald and the beautiful Darby Lynn Cartwright and Alexis P. Bevel.

Hi. Thanks for having us. Are you kidding? You know who's, you just got a target on your back? What? Tammy Brown's going to have a target on your back. Because that bitch reached out to me this week and was like,

can I come on the pod? And I said, we're not really having guests anymore. Katia was hospitalized. And now you guys are here. Okay. I did hear about that. Did you guys kill Katia for this? No, but I'm open to it.

I had a moment with, a Ouija board. And I asked a few questions. She did try math twice. Start and strong. I didn't do it out of the pipe. I sort of shotgunned it. It was Chicago, which we can talk about.

That doesn't count. We can talk about it. We cannot talk about. We will not be talking about Illinois. No. Chicago, the Midwest, or honestly, the United States. It's, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thankfully, we can talk about Bosnia.

Now, listen. What happened with the Sharko? Not the Sharkoity report. Well, no. Wait a minute. It was fun because. I was using it as a charcutory board at the time. If you want to try to reach someone from Wisconsin,

use a charcutory board. Yeah, I would know. I took a bite. It was like the ring of a pepper and that's what we were using as the upliette. But listen, yeah, and so I may have said like, I hope Katia goes soon. Is she okay?

I saw her yesterday. I mean, listen, I wouldn't say Katia's patient. I wouldn't say she loves discomfort or inconvenience. Yeah, sure. Imagine what it's like for her to be in a hospital with a tube in her nose. I said to the nurse I said I'm sorry

I said she's just not very good at discomfort she's not very patient sorry about whatever she does or says she's gonna have dementia because the thing that I've seen on the internet with your swipe is if you want to deprogram your brain and not get dementia you're supposed wait I lost it

yeah we're supposed to listen to you about not to get a dementia oh you need to be uncomfortable you have to get comfortable Neil deGrasse Tyson I don't take my camera. You have to be uncomfortable. You have to be comfortable with getting uncomfortable. We're sorry for what happens the rest of this hour. Oh my God. Are you kidding? I feel like this is what it must be like to be with Katia and I. Where you just sit there and let it happen. Oh, should I leave? Yeah, it would actually be great. We did the Wild, Wild Web and that's adorable. Eric's de Danio. He's so nice and so beautiful. You can't tell on his Tick that he has pecks. But in real life, I'll take my camera. He's got pecks. He does. And I love his little VHS setup. I love his little VHS setup. I love.

Yeah, I know. Everything was so cute. But he just, yeah, he just kind of sat there and nodded. Yeah. Did you guys? Fuck? Yeah. No. Wait, so we all know each other from Chicago. We do.

We've all been doing drag maybe a similar amount of time then. Yes. We were coming, we were starting as you were kind of, you had already come up and we had started in the Berlin in the Berlin heyday. But yeah. I was working locally in Chicago. Yeah, yeah. Yes. And I started to do.

shows with both of you, either of you, I feel like you and I did more shows together. Yeah. Yeah. You were slightly newer. I was slightly newer. I was coming. I was coming in. Because you were doing maybe competitions.

Yeah. I was doing like Rosco's and all of it. Did you ever win? I won. I actually, I lost. Why do I feel like you know that she didn't? I won her to tell the story of who she lost. I won the pre.

Oh. I lost the Miss Roscoe's competition. What year? 2004. I don't know. When she came out of her swimming. suit five girls quit on the spot yes and the one that stayed in one was miss geogun herself oh the boom boom boom gun the boom boom gun you didn't have you know what i loved her i saw her because we were both at

the party city um on western getting stuff for our night and i saw her there and then when i saw her at the miss raskos competition i said oh my god i saw you at party city today and this was post um season four share needles and that and so she thought i was coming for her And she didn't really like it. That's fierce, girl. You know, what I know about Gia is that interpersonally, she'll always give someone the benefit of the doubt and she'll never just jump down someone's throat.

Yeah, she's very... You really pick the right person. She's measured. She's measured. But you know what though? She's a great performer and she's so beautiful. I would be proud to lose to her in really any scenario. Oh, I'm so proud.

You should get on one of her Instagram or TikTok live. She's on there 24 hours a day. She's on apologize. I'm banned from getting on people's lives. What'd you do? I think. gets a little too sensitive because if you like go on someone's TikTok live and comment or you can't hear the tone they will like get banned for a week so you will get banned for people's

comments which I think is kind of unfair oh you'll get banned for people's comments yeah I get banned for other people's comments it's not because I've told someone that they just don't need to wake up tomorrow she likes to she likes to go on people's lives it was Alexis Michelle but I thought it was Alexis bevels yeah we get that a lot no she likes to go on people's lives and say do a call cartwheel. I do. And so I want to see if they will. Who did it? Maybe they will. Lana did it. Lana did it. Lana Juree was walking around New York and she goes, do a cartwheel. And you know, she's 19. So she was like, of course I will. Yeah. Someone came up to me and said, do a cartwheel. I'd say, kill yourself than me. Right. Okay. But she puts her phone down. She does a cartwheel completely off

screen. You can't see shit. So what? How do you know she did it? Because she ripped her pants. Girl, all you hear is And I was like, oh, but I get nervous I get nervous when I go to people's lives because I don't want to I don't want to be talked to or acknowledged at all. I do. I always comment like,

hi girl, looking good girl and I'll just like wait for them to acknowledge me and then I'll leave. That person, yes. The person who's doing it, but like in the comments when people are sharing really funny things I'm like, I can't be funny right now.

Okay, she just ripped her pants. Give me a minute. Right. Give me a second. Were they cute? Why was she in pants and drag? She wasn't in drag. She's just wandering the streets of New York.

You know, drag race isn't the winning thing it used to be. You know, you used to be on drag race. You didn't have to live on the streets, okay? But now we have girls out here doing cartwheels, ripping their pants. Where do they live? Let's take a break. Where do they live? Hello?

Hello? Where do they live? I wouldn't choose, I will say, Chicago is something I do miss about doing drag there is. Let's say you did your number. Let's say you're hot. It's winter. You go outside. The sweat freezes to your face. Let's talk about going in the alley and cooling down in drag. Oh my God. His alley is what we used to call it. You guys were both live singers in drag shows. And so when the rest of us be lip singing and then you have the live singers, what was that all about? Well, okay, so Courtney Act was on TV and I said, I can do that. Obviously I'm her. Obviously

I'm here. Yeah. And, oh. Sorry. That was a rimmed. shot. Oh, perfect. I used to REM when I was in my 20s and 30s. For me, it was about, I didn't feel confident in my lip syncing. Right. But you, I thought it made us feel and look different.

I didn't realize that she was good at it and I wasn't. I disagree. No, no, no, you're the most beautiful voice. You're my favorite person to sing with in the whole entire life. She sucks. I suck. She's actually, she's, you just give us a second. Can I see you back? Yeah, yeah. She's very. She's very.

talented. But there's a water right here for me. But at what? I have to break her, first of all, more than you expect. Have you seen her sourdough? No, that's what we call her poops. Oh. Yeah. So you haven't seen her from the back? It's yeasty. It's yeasty. And you know, she does your hair, doesn't she? Are you saying that you only have her hair to do your hair? Yeah. And I've always said that. I'm a sidekick. For sure. People will leave. But who's the leader here? Me, obviously. Are you sure? Yes, I am. Ask me anything. I. Ask me. Ask me anything. Ask me anything. I can do. I'll be a leader about it. Okay. Well, who's the, um, were you guys having any upcoming shows?

Alexis, tell him. I'm kidding. She doesn't know. She doesn't know. You know, I, just for a little insight into you guys as shows, I do actually, before we started, Alexis pulled this out of her dress. Yeah. Which I thought was a hit list. Um, Katte's at the top. That's weird. Well, she got her. But it's, it's actually a set list from your show. And I guess I like that this is about, first of all, this is already more production than Katte and I do. So I'm impressed. It's set list. One of the things says sit down. That's the part of the show where we sit down.

Okay. We even have a matching graphics so people don't get confused. Yeah, we just sit down. She makes all the graphics. My brother, my twin brother used to be a pastor, but now he's not a pastor anymore. And so now we're like, we're reconnecting. Anyway, he goes on tour with us. He probably won't join us for the next few cities.

And it's just an interpersonal thing between him and me and what brothers and we're learning. He's attracted to me. The pastor to graphic designer pipeline. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, he's trying to do stand-up comedy. Oh, God. He was opening for us.

Haven't we all been to Zany, Chicago when we shouldn't have been? It's the best because you get a before and after of what she looks like in drag and out of drag. That's rude. Huh? I developed an eating disorder to look like this. What has he done? What does that say? This says New York shit.

Okay. So this was from New York. New York. When we performed in Brooklyn. Yeah. At the Bell House. How nice. We talk about shit.

Do you feel like your Broadway self pop out when you're there? Oh, hell yeah. Well, we stayed in Times Square. We stayed in Times Square. I wanted to stay somewhere that would be calm. And close to the Eminem store. Yeah. Because I want my order every day.

Yeah. Yeah. You understand. Actually, Eminem's don't have rappers. Oh. So I also want to say it's nice because when you guys go to New York, because you guys do musical theater and you're annoying. And there, it's like very accepted.

Yes. It must be like you guys going on like a birthright trip. Yes. No. Oh. Oh. More than me. She's not really a theater.

She didn't do theater when she was little. Yes, I did. You know nothing about me. That is true. And listen, I'm so sorry. Tricky, can you not listen to this? This is going to be personal. You ask me over and over and over.

Yeah. Like things that should be known. You know, number one, I'm hung as hell. No, I do. I do know that. Oh, yeah, I forgot. I didn't mean to send it to you, but I'm glad you saw it. Thank you.

Number two, yeah, like my whole childhood you just like checked out of. And I know so much about you. You used to be a boy, L.O.L. Yeah. And your parents still accept you. Yeah. So I just want you to start putting in a little more effort. I'm sorry you had to see that.

Are you kidding? I talked to Katja like that all the time. Up next, current events. Okay, so that's when we say, let's talk about current events. And then we scroll our phone. We scroll through our phone. Don't give away the bit. Oh.

One time I went to a girl's show And she just showed memes Do you guys ever just show memes? Okay, we did have one In our first show we were trying out in Chicago Oh, that was a little... Her stories don't always go well So we were in Chicago

And it was a show that was too long We added an intermission In the middle of the show Right And in the moment? No, no, no, no. That's fierce to just be like intermission? You know what?

Okay. Well, we did say the show was 90 minutes ended up being like three hours. We didn't time it or run it beforehand, so it did end up being a little bit longer. But for intermission, she just sat on the stage and Oh, I watched TikToks.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stop. Yeah, so the audience came back and I played Fortnite a little bit. Talks with her. Do you play Fortnite? I have played Fortnite. I played it with Bob once.

Oh! I love it. It's the only game I know about. Or granny. He heeded me off a cliff and laughed at me. You can take fault damage. Did you die? Yee.

I didn't. I think it's too hard. Running, building walls and running at the same time. I don't do build mode. I don't do build mode. I just run around and look in the chests. That's all I do.

And I'd like to pick my outfit. The what? There's little... Because you have tits now? You think you could just look inside people's boobs. So you just open up people's chest and just look at everything you got. You walk up to women and just say, hey, lady. She's never been arrested.

She doesn't know. You go to the rest room and say, I'm here. I'm here. It smells like you're shitting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did buy it. a shirt from Marshalls that had poop on it? Do you like poop humor? Do you like poop humor? Oh yeah. Do you like poop? It's a huge issue for me. You don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. I just feel like it. It's not that I'm too good. It's that it's not, it's not funny. Yeah, yeah. Well, the actual stuff is. But if something poop has happening to me, I make it so known and I won't stop talking about it. So I don't know what that is. Where I want to be seen, I want to be witnessed when I'm having like, oh, I was constipated. I'm going to talk about it. Do you want to be perceived? Constipation's not funny.

It's not funny. Poopoo on a shirt and marshals and buying it anyway. Oh, wait a minute. I thought there was a graphic of poop on a shirt. No, no, no, no. Child's poop on a shirt. There was a brown stain that she thinks is poop. Hey, let's celebrate being able to fit children's clothing.

Thank you so much. Are you youth large? Because I'm not allowed to be around them anymore. I didn't know what to do with all the clothes I'd already bought for them. Okay. How are you so thin at like 46? I'm telling you, first of all, you're laughing about my age. However, I will be 42 in July.

I'm not laughing. Okay. I remember when we started doing drag. first of all, you were married and the fact that we were like 21 and we knew someone who was married. It was like what? Also, weren't you teaching special education? Yes, I was. Okay.

And still are in a way. I had this thought. Private tutor. I had this thought when Tracy asked if we wanted to come because Katja died. And I was like, yes, absolutely. And there's a couple moments I always tell when people bring your name up that like now I'm just giving myself. Yeah. Because they'll be like, you're, oh.

You have social media. People see you before. Go on. She doesn't run her on social media. She has no idea. No, one was we were in the basement of hydrate hitting our heads on poles. Oh my God.

The basement of, you guys, the basement of hydrate, I'm not kidding. This big. We're in drag like this. I'm not kidding. Kim Chie is planking. And we're all tall. Dungeon Crawler Carl vibes.

And Kimchie was in her headpiece era? She was wearing... So she was prone. She had a cloned. She was wearing a clock. A live bird. The two of you. A live bird in a bird cage.

A lie bird in a cage. Which was ethically handled. She did inform me last time we talked about it. Yeah. She. You confronted her? Yeah. Now if you ask her, she's like, oh, Peter was involved.

It was a rescue. Now it's a whole different story. Okay. She's testing the makeup on that bird. No, but 100%. And that's why we look so good. No, you and Kim were in the corner pooling your tips. Yes.

Because Kim was dressed as a pea and a pea pod and she didn't have green eye shadow. So you were pooling your tips so that you could go run get her green eye shadow and you could share chicken tenders from 7-Eleven because you hadn't eaten yet. So y'all shared this and I was thinking, silly, that's why I'm a special ed teacher because I'm never going to go hungry. Cut two, you're now super rich and I'm hungry all the time because I moved to L.A. and I think I have an eating disorder. Let's take another break. This episode is in partnership with Airbnb. Spring always does this to me,

one patch of sunshine, one brave tulip, and suddenly I am planning little Canadian getaways like winter never happened. I just got back from Toronto, where we did a live bald and beautiful show, and I had such a ridiculous amount of fun. The city was buzzing, the streets felt alive again, and everywhere I turned,

I saw patios opening up, people out and about, and that first delicious feeling that winter had finally loosened its grip. I stayed in this beautiful home I booked through Airbnb that had huge windows, a dreamy kitchen, and the kind of bathroom lighting that made me look slightly less gargoyle-esque.

After one good night of sleep after the flight, I became the kind of person who orders a pen of chocolate and takes a long walk through the streets of downtown as if I've finally found inner peace. Meanwhile, back at home, my place was empty, silent, and developing the aesthetic atmosphere of a haunted house. And that is why hosting on Airbnb, started to sound very smart for my upcoming summer travel.

While I'm off having my seasonal awakening in Quebec City or Prince Edward Island, my home could be hosted on Airbnb and earning a little extra income to help fund my next summer trip. Or maybe it can help with a little home improvement project I've been planning. Either way, it feels better knowing that hosting your home on Airbnb can help someone else have a lovely stay while you get a head start on your own next adventure. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca.ca. This episode is in partnership with Airbnb. Spring always does this to me, one patch of sunshine,

one brave tulip, and suddenly I am planning little Canadian getaways like winter never happened. I just got back from Toronto, where we did a live bald and beautiful show, and I had such a ridiculous amount of fun. The city was buzzing, the streets felt alive again, and everywhere I turned, I saw patios opening up, people out and about, and that first delicious feeling that winter had finally loosened its grip. I stayed in this beautiful home I booked through Airbus, Airbnb that had huge windows, a dreamy kitchen, and the kind of bathroom lighting that made me look slightly less gargoyle-esque. After one good night of sleep after the flight, I became the kind of person who orders a pen of chocolate and takes a long walk through the streets of downtown

as if I've finally found inner peace. Meanwhile, back at home, my place was empty, silent, and developing the aesthetic atmosphere of a haunted house. And that is why hosting on Airbnb started to sound very smart for my upcoming summer travel. While I'm off having my seasonal awakening in Quebec City or Prince Edward Island, my home could be hosted on Airbnb and earning a little extra income to help fund my next summer trip. Or maybe it can help with a little home improvement project I've been planning. Either way, it feels better knowing that hosting your home on Airbnb can help someone else

have a lovely stay while you get a head start on your own next adventure. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca.ca. slash host. I also want to say, I think it's, I also want to say, I think that that story we were trying to get Kim green foundation to paint her face green.

She was wearing this thing where her face was green and then on either side of her head, she had taken a green tap light. Yes. With eyelashes on it. So she looked like her face was a pee and a pod. Yeah, and she had the two pods. It was a day glow party.

So we were all in neon. Yeah, we were. And I think I wore, I think I had some kind of thing that said like live nudes, like a sign on my head or something. I don't know what I was doing. I didn't have anything neon because it was very early for me. And so I still wear this as a badge of honor. I was wearing a Kamora Hall suit, a little body suit.

Oh gosh. You want to talk expensive drag? I lost to Kamara Hall once too in a competition at Spin Nightclub. Oh, Spin. Oh, I miss that one. And Berlin. Shout out to Berlin. I've in the chat to Berlin.

You know what's a new? It's going to be a thing now. Yeah, decibel. Listen. Oh, is Berlin reopening? Not Berlin, but it's going to be like a restaurant. Right? No, it's a club.

It's already opened. Oh, good for them. Berlin was really fun and magical. Talk about a time of really like a free for all in drag. Everything was wild and crazy. Oh, yeah. This is the first time I ever tried Coke. Was Berlin?

No. I just lied to you. It was actually, it was in this guy's house. I don't know. But I didn't get to know him because he died. He jumped out of the built like his window and killed himself like two months later. You know, all of my drug stories are in. from Chicago.

Yeah, same. Yeah, that's all mine too. Same. To me, if you ask me, that is the cocaine capital of the world. I believe that. It's so cold and all the snow. Yeah. Drinking for breakfast, for sure.

The drinking, the level of hangover, the puking on the Amtrak that I did in my life coming home from Chicago. Oh, yeah, because you were training in from the Amtrak. Oh my God. After Berlin on Saturdays, I would get up, go get on the Amtrak, go back to Milwaukee, go straight to hamburger maries and do bingo. Oh, my God. You didn't even stop it.

You were hustling, hustling, hustling. You know what I remember when I think of you, meeting you before you went on drug, guys? Every day. Yeah. Okay. And we be honest, we do, but it's not because of us. We are, because we are two white women with problems,

and sure, do I have the signature Chicago face that I never changed? Absolutely. Doesn't look a lot like trixies. It might. You think? I've never thought that. So I just think it's the black.

You do this totally different. Yeah, I don't know. But people call us the Timu, Trixie and Katia. Are you serious? Yeah. Which one of you is Tripsi and Katia? Well, that's the thing is she's, um, I almost said something so rude. She's skinny like Katia.

No, say it. What? Skinny like Katia. She's Timu. I find out I might have a personality disorder. I found out. You found out? Yeah, two days ago.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. She said, yes, you do. Who told you? Everyone you've ever met? No, she saw a new. She's trying out a new therapist. There's no way you have two parents.

She's in Palm Springs. No, my parents and I don't talk, but my dad's 82 because he's homophobic and whatever. That's why we don't talk and he's sucking off one of his friends from high school. Makes a lot of sense. I knew you were either like had old parents or homeschooled or something. Yeah. Old parents who were gay. No, but we were in Berlin and we were chatting.

And timing is so funny because I remember hearing that you tap dance. Oh, yeah. And I also tap dance. And so I mess and message you on Facebook. I said, we should do a tap dance number together. And you were like, oh, yeah, that sounds. great. And then two minutes later, you were on track race. I think you were like on the way to the flight when you messaged me back. Yeah, I think the, I think I responded like, I think I said

okay loser. I think it was something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, which was fun. Something nice. Yes, yeah. Thank you for training her. Of course. Berlin was also a unique stage because you like enter from the basement. Actually a nice dressing room for a drag club. Yeah. A dedicated space with a curtain. Had mirrors. Yes. That's true. thing had an area to go get naked. And that area had a drain. So while you're tucking, you could piss on the floor. I have seen that happen a few fucking times.

I did that every time I was at Berlin. Also, that was when Fireball, like, launched. It felt like. Oh, Fireball was a huge drama in drag. I remember it being the official sponsor of all these drag shows, which, shout out to Fireball, kind of pre-drag what it is now. Fireball was like, yeah, we'll sponsor your drag show. Truly.

They gave us the money that paid us and free Fireball. Yeah, we did... Be be drinking fireball on the rocks. We were acting like it was... Oh, we'd sip it. Have you ever sit fireball? Oh my gosh. And that's a hot mug of fireball.

You don't warm your bones. Do you have a healthy relationship with others? No, you don't because you sip. Fireball. Yeah. Fireball. Oh, I loved it though. I did you.

Pay for it. Ooh, it's cinnamon. Actually, there was a moment at Berlin. We were doing a show and you were outside spray painting your nails. I did do. that a lot. Yeah, you were doing that. And it was, it was another moment where I was like, she probably can't afford nails. She was a teacher. I couldn't. She could. You were, you were older than us and married and had a real job. Thank you. Yeah. It seemed like

you were like a real person. And I just remember, we always, I always thought your husband was so beautiful. And he is. And he still is. We just went and saw. What's his name, Ned or? Curtis. Curtis. Ned is what I call him before I come. Yeah, Curtis Nedward. Yeah. Actually. Sure, why not. We went and saw him in a short film. He had a premiered his short film called Kiss, spelled K-I-55, and he was wonderful in it. That's great. He's just, he's a really good actor. The camera eats him up. Yeah. Oh, I mean, I will say, thank you so much Infinity. Um, he did an Infinity commercial dressed as a bear. And that has paid for so much of my lifestyle. He looks like Jack Quaid and Jake Jillon Hall together. Yeah. Oh, I could totally see that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He does have a Jake, uh, Jack Quaid vibe. Yeah. Yeah. Did you guys watch the boys? I watched the first episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I used to be one.

I used to, I like to say I was deep undercover as a dude. You're not the T-Mood T-Mood T-Griksie. What? Wait, the end of that sentence was she's skinny like hot-up, but she does her makeup. The best thing that ever happened. And then I tap dance, so we're basically the same. Because now I can say trans jokes because I have one.

Oh. Yeah, yeah. You got to catch them all or you got to catch the best one. Well, I believe when you have a trans joke, colleague, I do believe there's a, there's a, there's a closeness. There's a way you could speak to her that maybe other people shouldn't. So people at home, I will say, if you see her talk to her like this, that doesn't mean that you. Well, I've seen her pubs from behind on a cruise ship. Okay. And that changes everything. Listen. How much you see, are the, she bent over and the

pubs were coming out in the back. I think she's. Are the pubs red? Are they synthetic? No, they're dark brown. Those ones I didn't bring, no, I didn't bring my reds. Are yours gray? I do have some. It's starting, yeah. Are you shaving? It is beyond started, babe. You still have hair, though. That's pretty fierce.

It starts a little further back. You think? But I am going to Turkey. Oh, fierce. Yeah, I want to get, I want to get teeth like yours. Have you ever been to turkey? And I want to get hair like you used to have. Oh, I haven't had hair in a very long time now, probably 10 years.

And I got these teeth in America in Hollywood. Fabulous. Really? My dentist is in Beverly Hills. Dr. Oh, okay. There we go. Dr. Sun. Unrelated.

Cannot relate. When I first moved here, I had money to go to the dentist for like what the first fucking time. And I just Googled Woo is the closest dentist and she lived a block for me. Her dentist's how I selected my dentist. Most people probably do research. No, no, no, no, no. Whatever's closest. You have to go whatever's closest.

To be fair, we all, like our base dental care is pretty bad. For drag queens, are you kidding me? Yeah. Oh. Not to mention my upbringing. I'm like, I think Wisconsin paid for us to get a teeth cleaning once a year. maybe or a checkup, which wasn't enough. Well, not for Wisconsin when the main part of your diet is cheese.

And Mountain Dew. Who I love the Mars Cheese Castle, though. Girl. Oh! I miss it. What do you guys think of Milwaukee? Love it. Oh, we love Milwaukee eats, right?

Yeah. We've never had a bad time in Milwaukee. The Chicago of Milwaukee sisterhood of the traveling gauchos. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like St. Louis, New Orleans. And you guys in Milwaukee Pride is turned. Oh, my God. What's with Milwaukee Pride being so good?

It's so fun. Can I tell a Milwaukee Pride story that may not be appropriate? Okay. First time I ever met detox was at Milwaukee Pride. I was co-host-operate. Exactly. Well, I was a twink and I was alone with her. Is that appropriate?

No. No, she was really sweet. But we were, this drag queen and I were co-hosting Milwaukee Pride and it was unreal. Like, it just blew my mind. It's huge. It's crazy. You don't do anything. You just jump up and down.

It's like a festival. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and they're all drunk and gay. And there's one of those like gondolier swings that goes over the entire. The dance grounds. It's super fun. Oh, yeah, to go look. And you can like ride it and drag.

They got food, deep fried everything. Beer tents, multiple stages. That dance pavilion is crazy. Crazy. Thousands of people. And they're dancing for hours. Yeah. And they're not even, they're dancing while the sun is up.

They're dancing all day. There are 10 furries. In full fur gear, it's 100 degrees outside. They are out there for hours doing their thing. I'm in barely a dress and I'm like, it's too hot. I'll see you in a few minutes. I'll be right back. I was never on stage for more than five minutes.

Well, I also think market days is, I think market days partners with heat stroke. They kind of partner every year. Because market days has a liability to something. Because when is market days, July? August, it will kill you. Yeah. It's hot out there. And I have wished for.

No, but I was doing this thing. We were doing Milwaukee Pride and it was right. It was the weekend of, oh, this is going to be such a bummer. Sit down. Everything so far has been kind of sad. Okay. I know my brand. Pulse Nightclub in Orlando.

Oh. It happened. I don't know if we. It did. It did happen. And we had Milwaukee Pride the next day. Oh, I remember this. Yeah.

And there was a big conversation about are we going to do it? Do we, you know, who feels safe enough? And detox was supposed to be there that day, but obviously, like, she recused herself. She recused herself. And she's from Florida, I believe. Yeah. So she probably, it really hit her heart. Yeah.

But she, before the park opened, um, the other drag queen, she died in a fire. She texts, she gets a text that detox is here. She's about to leave. She just wants to say hi. So I came out and I stood like away because she was already crying and I didn't want to like, get in that business. Yeah. And so they're talking or whatever. And then she goes,

who's that? And then she brought me over and she's crying. And I go, hi, I'm Darby. And she goes, ooh, you're cute. And then kisses me on the lips. Smiles. Goes right back to crying.

And that just shows the resilience of the queer community in hard times. Or compartmental healthy compartmentalization. Yeah, exactly. Well, that's how we have to do with our childhoods in the such as. Well, queer joy, right?

Unbridled queer joy. And it's also very queer to be like, like if somebody, you know what I mean? It's like something kind of sexual. It's like, oh. It's also very, um, do you remember her in mean girls when she's like, big fat whore?

Yeah. It was like very bad. My niece was just a mean girl. She played Katie. She's too good for the program she's in. Oh. Wow. That's tough.

I love to go see production specifically. I love a community theater production. I saw a community theater production of a legally blonde a couple years ago. It ate. Sometimes the community theater eats. There's a Presbyterian church near us that does all the juniors. Like in the summer they have a theater. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Oh, do they do like rent junior where they don't have diabetes instead? Where they have diabetes instead. Oh. Okay. So my. She's out of stripper. She works at Buildabair or something. Well, honestly, I think that's more immoral.

If you work at Build a Bear, that's a scam. You get a bear so cheap. You can rip it out, put it in yourself. Would you stuff my teddy? It's a Builder Bear. Does she do that? Yeah, all the time. Something she does.

Yeah. Someone once said, like, I love Alexis. She's so funny, but I know it's got to be hard, like, to see her every day and, like, have to go with that. Oh, she has to edit me every day. Yeah, it sucks. Oh, I actually don't think between. Katinae, who has it worse?

Well, she's in the hospital. No, I mean, like, who. So her. Who, me having to work with her or her having to work with me. I don't know who, like, who wants to take the bigger bullet every day. Oh, that's true. Oh, this is interesting because working with your best friend, I would say, that's hard, huh? Do you guys hang out?

Because Katinae and I don't hang out or speak. Not anymore. We do. Yes, we do. We do, but only because I don't have a car. I live so close to her, so, like, she can't avoid me. Right. No, but the good thing, she doesn't call me anymore.

I won't. I know I don't call. her because she's... Where phones turned off. She's listening to my... We're listening to my voice and editing my face for eight hours a day.

I can't talk to off the internet. Also, you need to go have... If you guys talk about your life, you need to go have separate experiences and you kind of need to bravo, bravo, bravo, nothing you say matters unless that camera's rolling.

Yes. And I don't think that makes it a bad thing. No. Katia and I was talk about we just, because of this, we want to have stuff in the tank. To have the fresh discovery of a story with.

Regis and Kelly, they never spoke to each other until they got on camera. Katty and I on tour literally wouldn't see each other until we're on stage. That is her dream. Okay, that is my dream.

It's nice. It's just because, like, you require a lot of support. Who's the, who's the insecure, neurotic one? Who's like, the do I look bad? No, see, I used to be

the insecure neurotic one. And then I transitioned and I got on SSRI, Selexa 20 milligrams. I've never been happier. And I have a boyfriend. She cries now. Oh, you're a boyfriend?

Yeah, he's awesome. What's he like? For over a year. He is a musician like you. Who would play him in a movie? The comments say Noah Cahan What? What's that? Noah Cajon is a music artist

He's like long hair, beard, scruffy You know when you play Who would play her? You pick someone that everyone knows. Yeah, that would be helpful. The Noah Cajon community is going to come for you. Oh, shit. Now it's over. I'm sorry.

We're of a certain age, okay? We've known so many of us. You're quite a bit younger than us, right? No, I'm 40. I'm actually I'm 41 today. You're 41? Yeah, today's her birthday. You really have always had a youthful vibe.

Yeah, that's because she's not good at sentences and words. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought when we started doing drag, I thought you were younger than me. Thank you. This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Hello, I'm Dr. Lind Piscotti the 3rd, founder, CEO and chief inhalation curator of Atmosferik, the world's leading purveyor of small batch artisanal air in jars. Have you ever thought, I wish I could own the exact air from a couple loudly breaking up

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I want to wander through the quaint old port neighborhood like I'm in a Nancy Myers movie. I'll be taking in the historic brick buildings in sea air and spending an afternoon on a lobster boat trip like I'm a salt-drenched fisherman coming out of winter hibernation. I want amazing coffee, a buttery pastry, a little browsing in local shops, and the kind of region-defining dinner that only Portland, Maine can offer. Spring travel has that effect. It feels like a reset, a gentle rebirth after the heaviness of winter. And when I travel, I want a place that actually lets me settle in and enjoy it. That is why I love booking on Airbnb. I want a real living room to come back to, a kitchen for snacks in the occasional light breakfast,

and enough space to fully unwind after a day of walking and exploring in the sea air. If I'm traveling with friends, it's even better because we can all stay together and share the experience instead of being split up in separate hotel rooms. And of course, once I start planning one spring trip, I immediately start thinking about the next. Whether it's one quick may escape or the start of a whole season of travel, trips just feel more personal when you book through Airbnb. This episode is in partnership with Airbnb. Spring always does this to me, one patch of sunshine, one brave tulip, and suddenly I am planning little Canadian getaways like winter never happened. I just got back from Toronto, where we did a live bald and beautiful show,

and I had such a ridiculous amount of fun. The city was buzzing, the streets felt alive again, and everywhere I turned, I saw patios opening up, people out and about, and that first delicious feeling that winter had finally loosened its grip. I stayed in this beautiful home I booked through Airbnb that had huge windows, a dreamy kitchen, and the kind of bathroom lighting that made me look slightly less gargoyle-esque.

After one good night of sleep after the flight, I became the kind of person who orders a pen of chocolate and takes a long walk through the streets of downtown as if I've finally found inner peace. Meanwhile, back at home, my place was empty, silent, and developing the aesthetic atmosphere of a haunted house. And that is why hosting on Airbnb started to sound very smart for my upcoming summer travel.

While I'm off having my seasonal awakening in Quebec City or Prince Edward Island, my home could be hosted on Airbnb and earning a little extra income to help fund my next summer trip. Or maybe it can help with a little home improvement project I've been planning. Either way, it feels better knowing that host Hosting your home on Airbnb can help someone else have a lovely stay while you get a head start on your own next adventure. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.cena.ca. I will say the cast of characters when we started doing drag in the same, it was the arena,

Vixen, Pearl, Shea, Kim. Yes. The drag world was developing and flowering in that area code. Yes. That is, there was a moment where, like, suddenly all of Chicago, all of the girls we came up with were on the show. Yeah. And it was like, every year someone was on drag race. One or two of them.

Yeah. It was Gia. That it was me. That it was Kim. Yeah. Then I think it was Vix, it was like. She and then Vixen. Don't forget Nisha Lopez.

Nisha. When did she hit the scene? Well, Nisha. Nisha during the Kim season. Mm. It's not for me. No. Gia, Gia, I feel.

Oh, Gia was six. Yeah. Yeah. Nasha hosts. Oh my God. Drag race. My niece is going to be in We're Six, Junior. Oh, Mean Girls Jr.

So they changed the line where Regina goes, hey, I'm feeling very sexy. And his dad changed it to, hey, I'm going to take a selfie. And then she pulls out her phone and takes a picture of herself. I don't like junior versions of things. Oh, it's so fun. We don't need junior euphoria. We don't need junior. Okay.

Are you watching? I'm in Showgirls. I'm in show girls junior. They're old. They're old. Now that's a funny idea. I don't want to see old people go to high school. Showgirls Jr.

You need to watch Netflix. Everyone's 40. Show Girls Jr., but only performed by adults. If you guys went to audition Netflix today to play high schoolers, they would tell you that you're too young. Thank you. So you haven't gotten your eyes done yet. I have a question.

This list says twin nuendo. What's that about? So they, despite my objections, they have a podcast. Who's that? Her. Who's they? Her and her brother. Her twin brother. I love to hear her explanation of things because I get like a view inside her mind of like what is,

what does she think we're doing? Yeah. And so they have a podcast together called Twin You know that I am not on. That's why like when I'm not involved with like just kind of drift in and out. I haven't been. I haven't been. Well, I've been on it one time. But it is a boys club.

They don't have to do drag or anything. Right. And they have to and they talk about their trauma. We're doing trauma. Okay. It's trauma talk. You know, he was a pastor for almost 20 years. I was a drag queen.

you know, we weren't close. He was a boy, she was a girl. Can I make it any more obvious? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. And much like Avrilavine, I do hope to kill him and replace him one day. I love Averloving. Oh my gosh. I like the original one the best, but I got to say, the one that she is now. What's her name now, Stacey or something? Melissa? What do they think Taylor is? They think Taylor's like Melissa or something? Melissa. The comments would be like, Melissa, blink of your pay. She was in Law & Order SVU last week. I did hear about that. Spian.

Oh, she was so good. And that's okay. That's okay. She was amazing. Are you and your brother identical? We're Mary Kate and Ashley fraternal. Did you know Mary Kate and Ashley are fraternal? They look very similar.

Yeah, we look a lot of like, I'm an inch taller and he's straight. It's really fun with them on tour together because she'll walk behind a pillar and then he'll come out the other side and I'll be like, whoa! And that's kind of a fun twin hijinks. Yeah, that happened one. You want to hear about twin hijinks. She rented a car the last time we went, we went to North Atlanta, Alpharetta, and Orlando. We rented a car to drive the two.

Well, we used to say Orlando and then we realized, yeah, yeah, yeah. We're North Atlanta slash Alpharetta. It's a beautiful name, though. And so she bought a car. And then she was like, you're going to drive. I'm just going to give you my ID in case we get pulled over. Because she don't want to put him on the thing.

Oh, am I allowed to say that? Yeah, no, go for it. No, blow up her spot. No, but she's not. I don't think either of you're in a financial position to get banned from enterprise. We're absolutely not. And it was six tea.

First of all right, you think we can afford enterprise. Have you ever heard of six? You guys are Alamo. We're six. No, bitch. We're six with a T. Yeah. You want to start a company?

The number with a T. What's the one where you rent someone's car, Truro? That's, no. I'm not doing that. Were you rent, you like, you like could, like, could, like, could, like, rent it for people to come get it and use it for the day. I have a Subaru. That's, or in Milwaukee.

Kind of a great business venture. Oh, yeah. I used to, yeah, I used to love Zipcar. But she was mad that I didn't put her name on it because she just learned how to drive again. No, no, no, I'm a very good driver. I just got my ID back. We got in really late and I couldn't wait in the sixth line. You know the sixth line is crazy.

There was no one there. So we just went straight to the car. Yeah. And I was the only one on it. And because he's straight. And he drives better. Yeah. So I just gave him my license.

No, I'm a very good driver. I shouldn't be driving. Everybody's like, are the way most safe. I'm like, the gay people are out here driving. I'm not gay. No driver is better than gay driver. Technically, I'm not gay. more. My mom was throbed. Oh my god. You are the stereotype of a woman driver.

Apparently, yeah. Yeah. You're part of the problem. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Hadosexual white lady? Yes. You should see her titties. Get on Facebook. The nipples are bigger than you think. Hi mammas. You should become a trad wife. Hey mamas. You should MLM. Can I tell you my current obsession, the thing that helps my SSRI is hand sewing, dresses. And I'm going to the hobbit. Okay. Don't look at me like that. I love sewing. And I like, I feel like you more control with hands. It's the most productive thing she's ever done. And I could do it in the plane. Hand sewing? You do do it in the plane. I love it. Girl, she doesn't care where her elbows end up. You're telling me that you're back in 21C. I love that. Yeah, she really is. I really am.

Yeah, I have to watch out for the stewardesses. Have you guys ever? Stuart I. Don't be insane. Well, this next note from the show says, don't impress me much. That's a song that I do. It's the only song I do. She has done that song. I do. I do. I do it. I do. I do it. I do to performance song for about eight years now. And I'm not exaggerated. But it's improv because during the part where she says, So you're a rocket scientist. I stop the music and I say, hi, what's your name?

And he says, you know, what's your name? Daniel. And I say, what do you do for work? Retail. Okay, so you probably have to deal with like customers and like interpersonal relationships. The song is called That Don't Impress Me Much. So.

And I can't change the lyrics. Geniah Twain is very litigious, as you well know. And then it comes in, that don't impress me much. And now that I've said it on this podcast, I'm going to have to retire. No, nobody listens to this. They're going to see this thumbnail. They're going to realize neither of you are Katia and they're going to fucking leave.

Absolutely. And you know what? Thank you for that. Thank you for realizing that finally. You know what? Two of you put together don't even equal one vascular crackhead. How does that feel? Oh, we know.

Oh, you don't know. We're very self-aware. I used to put drugs in my butt. And that is something that I have heard that people do. And I just, in my experience, I can barely have like a solid. BM without injuring myself. So how are people putting drugs up there? Solid. Oh my God. We had a guy come to our meet and greet and give us metamusal. Metamusal gummies. Are you ever doing any of that? Our lives. Well, I usually am oscillating between

a Miralax experience, but I'm always afraid like, I'm afraid that a metamusal is going to stop things up more. What do you think happens? Because metamusel, it does. It does when you go off it. I've, I kind of know what birth was feeling. This very hot guy whose dad died in 9-11. He brought We don't always have to say who died in a story. Well, we're not supposed to. His mom doesn't like it when we say it. She did that request that we're talking. She did. But she's not here. Yeah. She's not in Hollywood USA, honey.

And neither is her husband. He's not anywhere. Okay, sorry. I'm sorry. Grant, I'm sorry. No, but he brings us these gummies. We start taking them. We start having solid poops every day. He's wild. And then I forget to take them. No one tell us. Yeah. Like he didn't say, by the way, if you start, this, you can't just suddenly stop because I'm going to lock everything up forever. What? Yes. And so at Christmas, I'm in my in-law's house and I rip my butthole wide open.

Mine came a few months later. And wasn't it horrifying? Do you watch The Pit? Yeah, you've been to be in the pit. I've never seen it. I mean, I know, you guys, I know about ripping a butthole. Yeah. I don't have to watch a medical show to understand. What are you watching? Do you watch? What am I watching? I've been watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills from the beginning. Oh. My ex used to watch it all the time and so I peripherally have seen parts of it. Yeah, you've gotten the gist.

And I texted Lisa. I said, you never guess what I'm watching. I've been watching Beverly Hills from the beginning. I was like kind of like. Does she say? She's so fabulous. Embarrassed to admit that to her. Like I was like, but then again, I'm like, she's always kind of scandalized that I

haven't seen it. What does smell like? Beautiful. Yeah. She is exactly as you would see on the program. I'm watching the program being like, she really is, um, maybe me just miss hanging out with her a little bit. So I texted her being like, I'm watching Royal Housewives of Beverly Hills. She's like, wow. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's like 15 years ago.

It's like, hey, I'm watching home videos of you. It's pre-COVID. It's a different world. Oh, we were just talking about that on the way over here. Do you watch Matlock? There's a new Matlock with Kathy Bates. Yes, with Kathy. I've never seen it. I watch Gypsy Rose Blanchard life after lockup. It got discontinued now. What did she do in her life after lockup? The show literally starts. I feel like I'm the only person who watch this because I never hear anyone talk about this and it's canceled now. Okay. The show starts with her getting picked up from prison and them going to buy her shoes.

Like you guys, it's the, in a world of people moving into fake houses to be on reality TV, this is about as real it gets. A gypsy Rose Blanchard at shoe carnival getting paparazzi. Oh my God. It hires back to a different time in reality TV. Oh, yes. Well, now here's a beautiful question. You're released from prison.

Where are you going first? She gets McDonald's and she gets shoes I love that I would go You know what Turn it on its head I would go to jail I would just make sure

I didn't leave anything in holding You're a pick me girl I'm going to I need attention Yeah yeah yeah I don't love me I'm going to Taco Bell And I'm going to a fabric store

Girl You want to go get a job Do you know what they need to get For the girls The dragoons They need to get You know how they have like a Long John Silvers

And McDonald's combo or whatever They need to get a fabric store, Taco Bell. Yeah. While your fabric is getting cut, you go your chalupa. I would be in there. I would get a job there. I would quit drag and get a job. Do you guys cook?

No, absolutely. I started making CrunchRap Supremes at home on my own. You just need to buy the ingredients. The Taco Bell doesn't want you to know this. You know they make one in, what's the restaurant? It's a Thai restaurant in West Hollywood. I can't remember the name. But they make their own version of a CrunchRap Supreme.

But it tastes just like. it. Oh, interesting. Yeah, I mean, all you have to do is get the giant tortilla. You get the small crunchy tortilla and you layer it all and then you pan fry it. Oh, that's fabulous. I'm a Mexican pizza girl. Or it's better than the Taco Bell one. I'm sure McDonald's was a really weird case of day. I'm a, I'm a Mexican pizza girl. Me and Doja Cat. You are. She was so excited. Dolly liked that too. Dolly Parton liked that too. Really? Mexican pizza. I love it. It's so good. Did you have it in school growing up? That was always my favorite day. Mexican pizza at school? It was an octagon. And so. What? Yeah. You're, you're, you're, you're not. You're

You're not talking about Taco Bell sanctioned Mexican pizza. This is woke. No. I'm talking about like, you know, pizza day in school, it's the big rectangle. Back in my day, there were boys and girls. But, okay? Not Mexican, we she, they, them, Mexican pizzas. Yeah.

In my day, people were singular, okay? Okay. We weren't dealing with the plural. Don't look at me. I'm her. She was they them for a week and it was terrifying. Yeah. That was hard.

It was really hard on everyone in her life. I do think it's funny that about eight. days later you said so yeah we're gonna flip the script what guess who's back back again you know yeah yeah okay mom I'm straight again it's an evolving journey of self-discovery it really is about you for a second so just know

that do you want to look away yeah that would be great okay she's a completely different person as her fully realized female self she sucked as a boy did she wear nails you know she does I'm growing them out oh okay she says that every time no she's so much better.

She'd be growing them out for years, honey. For years and years. And then she does have to cut them occasionally. She's growing them out. We look over. She's sniffing them right now. I lost three when I was on the plane sewing my new stays.

Okay. Yeah, she needs, she can't wear nails because she's doing her homage hand sewing on the plane. Well, because she's on that technology, the plane. She doesn't, it feels like it's too advanced for her. I have a question. The next note in your show says,

it's not that easy being mean. Okay, now this is her time to shine. That is, that is another. I used to do. I don't do it anymore, but it seems like you do. This is from what last week? That is from last October. She doesn't wash her clothes. This was in your pocket

since last October? Apparently. This is Velvet by the way. That's fierce girl. This is Velvet. I do love that. I don't know what they call that sequence where the inside is velvet. Yeah, yeah. It's hot though. It's so hot and that's why I only... Do you think she would have washed it? Indeed. It was

winter when we were. Oh, it was winter. It was a different time. And we stayed in Times Square. No, but we went to Times Square a lot. It's hard to sleep outside. Yeah. Um, no, but not easy being mean. I sing the song, not easy being green, but obviously, it changed the name. Exactly. Oh, parody work. And then I had, um, parodic. Kind of Sherry Monte. Oh, thank you. And I always love poo or, you know. Is that her song? She's the queen of a poop song for sure. That's why you don't have her on. You hate poop. You hate it. She's like, just shit my, just shit my pants. Like, I just shit, shit my pants.

It's always like I shit my pants. I shit my pants. Well, I should a pair of tights once in an Uber. Anyway. Why were you wearing just tights? It's not your business. He was very fetal to sit naked with just tights on in the Uber. You never did that? Also weird. I would go completely ready for the gig. No clothes. You didn't do that? Recovered memory. Why were taxis so cheap in Chicago back in?

Oh, yeah. They used to pay you to take a taxi. They're still a little bit cheaper than Uber. It was Obama. Thanks, Obama. Thanks, Obama. Now what? Ler-Li-Li-Joe. I gotta be honest, I'm not loving what Joe Biden's doing in office right now.

It's tough. The world seems crazy. Right. We got to, someone call your grandpa. Nope, political humor? Great. I'll save that for Kelly Mantle. Oh, yeah.

Kelly really watches CNN. That fucking bitch. I'd love to watch her watch the news. I bet it would freak her out. Girl, she can only be in touch with what she's in touch with and what she's in touch with is very little. And how did you, how did y'all end up like having her a part of all of your live events? Because she's a perfect addition to you and Katya. We were coming up with a character that would be like our manager.

And I was like, who is deeply available? And, you know, drinks on a level that can make my drinking seem kind of, you know. Are you a drinker? Not really anymore. Yeah, same. I mean, two glasses of wine at dinner last night. That was me getting wild.

Do you have a headache today? No, I'm okay. Oh. How old are you? 36. People think I'm older because I'm bald and I look old. You don't like cold. Well, no, I just, we were coming up at the same time, so I thought we were both really young.

We were really fresh and young. I started to drag it like. 30. That's normal, right? That was crazy. Yeah, that's right. You were like, hey, I'm old. Hey, guys. Yeah. Yeah, you kept saying that. Because I'm kind of being like, hey, I'm old. We were all like, we get it. We get it.

It's because I knew twink death was coming for me and I was so excited that I was still on life support. So I was showing off. Can I say, for real, it will come for you and you have to develop a person. Daniel. You got to pick up the dumbbell or pick up the wig. Exactly. Absolutely. And I wish you would put down the, wig. I also want to say I I yeah. As an educator, former educator, do you think there's some skills that carry over to controlling like a drag audience? Yes. Right? People management. Well, I taught special ed and so I had to deal with people on a daily basis who needed extra support. And whatever I was doing,

I had to have three or four different options for how I could communicate that idea. Right. When people are drunk in a bar, you have to be ready to either be, like, you say whatever you say, they're going to laugh, or whatever you're going to say they're going to say they're going to pay attention at all, they're going to be in a different room. Right. Okay? And that's working at a bar in Chicago. And, yeah, you have to learn how to, like, talk to a drunk asshole in a charming way.

Although, sometimes when I would get drunk, I would become the drunk asshole. The first time I ever met Katya, I was wasted. and I tried to fight her outside Rosco's. And then... So you don't have to be drunk to fight her. Thank you. But I needed it. I needed the confidence.

And then the guy at 7-Eleven called the police on me. The one right on Halsed? Mm-hmm. You know, but knowing that it was Katia, I bet she was in perfectly sound mind. She... Can I be honest? She was.

She was probably smoking cigarettes. Listener, she was. She was, and she was chill. And I went up and was like, I don't know why I started to fight her. You know what it was? Dominance. I'm an alpha.

Sorry. She'll talk to anyone as long as she can smoke at the same time. Yeah. Well, she won't fight them while she's smoking. She's like outside smoking. Go up to her. She's in her happy place. She's at her best.

I don't think she smokes anymore. I tell people that we smoke. It explains our teeth. Yeah. But we don't smoke. Also, it's a great way. You know, when I worked at like a real job, I was always pissed off that smokers got all these extra fucking breaks.

I was just thinking that. I was just, I had diarrhea. When I worked at the Mac counter, I'm like, can I go stand outside? I forgot. You worked at the Mac counter. Remember when Mac was it? Mac's coming that girl again. It is.

It's coming back. Yeah. I've always loved it. Did you go back to Mac after you launched your makeup line and you said, big mistake, huge, or whatever? No, because I also got fired from there. What did you do? Nothing. It's a whole story.

Okay. We don't have time. We're wrapping up. Please don't talk about. There is one more that I want to talk about. Are you really just going through a set list from October? Well, I'm, hopefully you're not doing any of this again. No, we're not.

You know we are. So if you guys go see their live show, make sure that you act. I want them to overact how new this is. Yeah. Whoa. Okay, the sit down joke. The sit down joke is really enjoyable. So make sure you scream.

There was a moment in Orlando, though, when I was telling a story and I thought, you've all heard this on the podcast, haven't you? And the whole audience goes, yes. Yes. I know. And sometimes they're too nice to say anything. Yeah. Yeah.

But Katyn I have absolute brain death, so we don't fucking know. Right? Well, you just say, like, that's part of... You just remember she has an Adam's apple. I'm so sorry. That was that guy's dad. There is one more point I want to hit. This says death equals lady.

What's going on there? So, Darby... Oh, yeah. Early on in our... In our IMAHO, the show journey, Darby had a new death story every single time. Not on purpose. I just find it really interesting when people die.

She likes to talk about death. Did you guys use to talk about death? Did you guys used to do lives? Yeah. No. No. Our show started because we used to do your close and personal friends, Soju. Soju.

Used to do a live version. You used to do soju's live, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. We started on live. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does Soji do drag still?

I'm not sure. Wouldn't you know? I don't really know her, honestly. What? She came up after she was gone. No, you're very close to Soju. That's what Reddit says. I've maybe met her a couple times.

I'm just. kidding. I'm fucking with you. I remember her being extremely beautiful. And then she had a show where she would get drunk on live. Extremely. Yeah, yeah. Shot was so cute. Shot was so ju.

Shot was so juke. And that's how she decided to do a show. And I was like, well, I can keep going with that. Yeah, yeah. And then I elbow. Auntie Chan started dining. I love Auntie Chan incredible. She's so good.

Is she working? Yeah. She's amazing. She's fucking fierce girl. She's amazing. She's so funny. She's the finest person of the world. And then I got jealous and I said, please don't do anything without me.

And so I elbowed my way in. Yeah, Chan said you are a decade older than me. I'm wasting my time. And so luckily, I have my silver medal ready to go. Yeah. Thank you. It's nice to be the second or third choice. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's where I'm comfortable. I like to be in a supportive position. I think it's good because alone, you guys have nothing. Yeah. And together, this is, hey, you're here. Yeah. Thank you. And that's what it's about.

We're putting that on the poster for the next life tour. Hey, we're here. Yeah. Well, how long have you guys worked together now? Oh, my God. Gotta be pushing dead years, right? We started at Hydrate. I think 14.

Wow. It's long. Because we started at Hydrate doing, there was like the Snow White and the Seven Drag Queens. I remember that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so we would do that. We did that together.

Fierce. Yes, we've known each other for a while. But I got to say, knowing you as a girl is so much more fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I, since I, we fought on stage at VidCon last year, and I called her a dumb bitch in front of a bunch of a bunch of children.

You heard about it? But I think it's because I have a personality disorder. So I'm really sorry, but I put in my time with you as an undercover boy. This is just my version of that. Of course. We accept the love we think we deserve. So I don't know what happened to you. Well, thank God I have a boyfriend now and he's really lovely.

Oh, yeah. And nice and hot. We're going to have to wrap up. Understand. She painted his penis green and put a hat like a witch's hat on it to make it look like Alphaba. I had an Alphaba doll. And I put the hat on it and then in Photoshop, I painted it green. I would never actually do that.

The second Wicked was so bad. Oh, wait. You know what? What? We're going to let Trixie run the show for a couple of minutes. But the third one was fierce. Yeah, I love the third one. The third one.

Oh my God. When the munchkins all start fucking, I'm sorry. I've been watching a lot of weird videos. I have to tell you this. I miss Dunkin' Donuts. Do you miss Dunkin' Donuts? I saw the funny thing here on yesterday. It was this guy.

There's one hot twink guy. Much like you, not you. Much like you. And his whole thing is that his penis is small. Oh. And he loves that it's small. And I think that's beautiful. I don't super care about you.

Thank you guys so much for. No, I was going to say, I was going to say, I really super do not care about smaller, small. Oh, no, we don't either. That's the point. I love a small one. Get a fucking life if you care. Sorry, everyone. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. My dad cares. My dad has a micro penis. Nixon. Anyway, so I click on his video because he's hot and I'm like, yeah, let's go small penis. And he has his phone like here and he comes and then

he goes, I'm sorry. Was this in Wicked 3? This was in Wicked 3. This is the climax. Right. Yeah. Goon News. So he comes and then he looks in the camera and he goes I told you my little guy would make a mess.

If you guys want to see these people, they're online And you also can you also can He said them You can actually Thumbs down this video And maybe you'll never see them again And maybe never see us again We'd like to thank you so much for having us

Are you kidding Thank you to Katia for Do you have oh can you give a message of hope to Katia? Oh yeah Well I know that we share a birthday Oh is your birthday today And my birthday is today So I

We said that already So you did You were in the throes of hosting It's okay And so I was kind of When you told me that I was like Cotcha's birthday today

Yeah In the hospital Well and I was like Oh sure Cotcha's out sick on her birthday And then she posted that But also love this She posted a picture

With tubes in her nose With no information And just said death comes for us All or some shit I love that You know there's a 14 year old crying right now Well I hope you're getting

I saw on Twitter someone sent someone's been people have been memowing her. Oh. She's a millionaire. She's a millionaire. Love it. Just send her the money. Oh, well, it's her birthday.

At Trixie Mattel. At Alexis Meadows. And at Alexis Bevels. Katia, listen. We hope you get better soon. We're sorry and but thanks and strong. And together we can. Well.

Doste, Ania. In my homosexual opinion is a fabulous program that you can check out. Thank you guys so much. You're joining me. Thank you. The power of the Midwest. West compels us. Do I do that?

I've never been a top. You have a special pink. Everything. Oh yeah. I have this pink side. Then you guys are on the devil side. Are you still doing that? Pink?

Like in your house? Yeah. Everything's pink. Oh, I love it. You like it? I do. I've never gotten sick of it. You're runner.

That's nice. I can't run anymore because of my arthritis. It's a whole thing. We can't talk about me on the show. Oh yeah. This was about you. Okay. I'm sorry.

Okay. I don't have arthritis, but I do have, I did have a ripped butt hole for a couple of months. I'll get your number and I'll text you all my questions. Don't. Please don't. Okay. Bye. Bye.