The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya - Lushious Massacr's Plan for World Peace Through the Booty Hole with Trixie and Katya

Episode Date: December 9, 2025

Official Statement from the esteemed Lushious H. Massacr IV, Esq.: In a moment unprecedented in the annals of human cooperation, the international drag community proudly proclaims the dawn of lasting global concord, achieved through the harmonious power of the Astounding Portal of Unity: The Booty Hole. Let this precious orifice inspire nations to transcend petty grievances and embrace collective purpose and tolerance. The world now stands as a unified polity, fortified by a shared commitment to dignity, mutual respect, and the serene magnetism of this starry symbol. Let this historic declaration affirm Lushious' hopeful belief that even the most unexpected sources may guide humanity toward its highest destiny. Your home might be worth more than you think! Find out how much at ⁠https://Airbnb.com/HOST Get your gut going this holiday season and support a balanced gut microbiome with Ritual’s Synbiotic+. Our listeners get 25% off your first month at https://Ritual.com/BALD Join the millions of Chime customers who are already banking fee free today! It just takes a few minutes to sign up. Head to: https://Chime.com/BALD For your free insurance check to see if your insurance covers GLP-1s—for free, head to: https://Ro.co/BALD For an exclusive $35 off Aura Frame's amazing Carver Mat Frame, use Promo Code BALD at https://on.auraframes.com/BALD Check out Lushious on YouTube: LushiousMassacr Follow Lushious: @LushiousMassacr Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch the podcast on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT⁠⁠ To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipYT⁠⁠ Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠ If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com⁠⁠ To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://trixieandkatya.com/#tour⁠⁠ To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemotel.com⁠⁠ Listen and Watch Anywhere! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠ Follow Trixie: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemattel.com⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠ Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠   Follow Katya: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.welovekatya.com⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@katya_zamo⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/welovekatya⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠   #TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

On a recent fall trip to the wild, wind-swept majesty of Nova Scotia's rugged coast, I stayed in a home I booked through Airbnb. It was so breathtaking that I felt myself carried away on the briny scent of the Atlantic, the low murmur of crimson and copper leaves swirling along ancient cliffs, and that hushed enchantment of stepping into a seaside cottage that warms the soul. And somewhere between my twilight wanderings along the weather-beaten shoreline and my dinner with a local fisherman, a thought swept over me like a tide. I, too, could host my own home on Airbnb.

My place could be welcoming travelers while I'm away, perhaps even helping to fund the New Year's voyage I'm planning to Greece, where I dream of greeting January beneath the white stone chapels and the shimmering acheon sky. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca.combe.combeauce. Welcome aboard via rail. Please sit and enjoy.

Please sit and sip. Play. Post. Taste. view and enjoy via rail love the way on a recent fall trip to the wild wind-swept majesty of Nova Scotia's rugged coast I stayed in a home I booked through Airbnb it was so breathtaking that I felt myself carried away

on the briny scent of the Atlantic the low murmur of crimson and copper leaves swirling along ancient cliffs and that hushed enchantment of stepping into a seaside cottage that warms the soul and somewhere between my twilight wanderings along the weather-beaten shoreline and my dinner with a local fisherman, a thought swept over me like a tide. I too could host my own home on Airbnb. My place could be welcoming travelers while I'm

away, perhaps even helping to fund the New Year's voyage I'm planning to Greece, where I dream of greeting January beneath the white stone chapels and the shimmering acheon sky. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca.com host. Hey, we're very excited to announce our 2026 very bald very beautiful tour you thought we were bald before you thought we were beautiful before baby you ain't seen nothing yet we're coming to Boston we're coming to Seattle and probably some more use code very V-E-R-Y to buy tickets at Trixie and Kattee.com don't just see any cross-dressers see the cross-dressers Hey Trixie where did they get tickets get your tickets at tricksey and katie.com

Wow So you are not just a fart, you're a queefer. Yeah, I can do both, yeah. Double trouble. Double trouble. Why don't you do a gas release? Yeah. And I have to guess if it's a quefe or a fart.

That's a fart. Correct. Do you know why I think I know that? I think a quefe has more of a like... I don't agree. Really? I think they both sound very similar. Are you able to do a quiff

To hear the difference She can just quiff Okay Yeah I agree Okay what about this one Was that a A thief? That was a thief

Girl, can I just say Welcome to the pod I don't know why That's exactly where I came here You got in the debauching To sit here for her to show that to you Well actually let me tell you this Have you, what would we call?

Because you know when the girls are getting pounded down and the booty holes just loose? A squelch. And it starts making like fart noises, but it's not a fart. But she's talking. She's talking to you. It's gibberish. What would you call it? Making that ass talk. Okay. It's like a Would it be like a buff? Well, it's like

you know how you want to make it clap? You want to make it talk. Right. I don't want to be fucked in a way where my body is making completely out of control like rhythmic. Like, ugh. No, no, it's not like a seizure. It's not like a booty seizure.

It's just like a... It's just things that have... What about cream? Have you ever creamed? Do you ever get so... Pound it's so disgusting that you just start like fuzzling cream out of your booty hall? No, that's shit. It's kind of a bourbon glaze.

No, no, no, it's not brown. It's completely white cream. It's like a thousand islands. Yeah. Yeah. It's like a little ranch. There might even be a little foam. It might be foamy.

It's like a whole milk latte. Yeah. But have you ever creamed? That's my question to you. No. No, it's never been that serious. After that happens, I... I cream and squirt.

I don't relate to... I don't relate to, like, windows open, full light, spread a hole, and then after the sex, we're not going to clamp me open and I'll take a look. Like, once things have happened, I'm like, like, cover everything. Throw the tarp over the bottom, like I drop the Jurassic Park. Cover the dig. Like, you know what I mean? Because we've been dug out.

So officially, Trixie Mattel is not ran through. No, she's a pilgrim woman with a... the tightest little pussy you ever. She takes care of her booty home. No, it's not that I've not had done sex things. When it comes to anal penetration, I need to be in love pretty much. Okay. But when you are in love, you do let them go in there and destroy the house.

Of course, they bought the house. Rans, that's service. They own the house. They live in the house. Squatters. Okay. I love that. Obviously, if you guys are listening, we have the one and only luscious massacre in the studio.

And I do hope you are watching because you are about to have the hardest to mess and boner you have ever had in your life. What do you mean? Looking at your gorgeous body and face. Well, I will say I do love that I came on here and y'all are just men. We don't dress up for this. Just looking like dudes. This is the only thing we don't dress up for. Excuse me.

Oh, sweetie. Wait, is that a wig? Is that a wig? Don't do this. Is that a wig? Because I was about to say, the bald and beautiful. I know these girls are bald. She got her shrubbery on you said, is that a wig?

Oh, my God. Girl, it looked like a boss. You know what? Isn't it hard to present as male? You don't find it. She does. Girl, her fucking wiglet... I find it difficult.

Her wiglet looks like lichen growing on the side of a moss. Like I literally scalped a 17-year-old skater. Okay. You know what I mean? No. Do you... Did you ever experiment in like a boy look? A rough and tough boy look?

I'm currently going through a phase right now where I'm like, when I'm a woman, I'm a woman. And when I take the wig off, I try to be a man. But you naturally, I'm just so feminine. I'm such a, you know, I call myself a creature during the day. Creature. Yeah, there's... I got no brows on. Mary, that's what we've, we've talked about this so much.

My hair line looks crazy. Like, in what world do I look like? Male, but I try. I try to present. My fave is when the girls out of drag, they look like they're doing a drag king turnabout show. They have basically the chin strap on and the fedora. Oh, see that.

And they walk into the club perpetrating. Oh, my go, is that Mariah? You know, like, I'm not, I'm from the school of if you're a goddess at night, you're a goblin during the day. Yeah. Those are my favorite kind of drag queen. Me too. The ones during the day, you don't even.

look like you belong in society. Yeah. It's very middle earth. Oh, it's middle earth. You look like a creature. Like a monster from another planet. Like you sacrifice your masculinity for drag. You do.

That's old school drag. It is old school. A lot of the kids these days really don't want to do that. Because it is hard. Like when I... Well, you know, the kids nowadays, they're just having fun. These kids. Yeah, with their wet hair and no tities.

Thank God there's a woman in here to me. willing to talk about it because all these girls they might have wigs and they might have dresses but I don't know if the girls are doing drag well it's because you know what it is too a lot of the girls now it's paint by numbers they're inspired by all these queens that came before they're at the paint your own pottery studio

yeah they got the YouTube it's hard to find originals anymore well because they're at the drink and draw with drag they're at the drink and draw they're just playing in makeup and wigs the girls it's Halloween all year for the girls it's Halloween on year no listen this

Halloween I didn't do any they were like what are you going to do for Halloween be a man sweetie I've been doing Halloween all day long all year long I'm tired of it I get like volatile when people are excited about Halloween I want to go like you think your costume is something yeah you look like shit you look like doing this out here in the streets yeah we're doing this during Easter bitch I was in drag during Valentine's court I'll be doing this I'll be in this on November 1st the day after Halloween rise rise baby I've been in track all year long I'm tired of this I'm exhausted. Just give it up at this point.

I have some questions. Yes. I met you years and years ago. Have you met her before? I don't, when, I don't. You have, let me tell you this. She met me once. It was at a drag con.

I was coming out. She was going in. Was it in New York? You were so nice to me. She looked, she took one look at me and she said, bitch, you look sick. You are in drag. I said that? And I said, well, yes, I am in drag.

Because, you know, back in those days I would paint. Was it L.A. or New York? Must have been L.A. It was L.A. Okay, because New York. You don't even like to travel. No, in New York, I couldn't smoke. I was not in a good mood.

Okay. Yeah. You, your old paint, as we all learned you, when I met you, when I learned you, it put, it made me, Kim Chi, the rest of us look like we were just little girls with no makeup on. Yeah. You were painted. Rabbit dogs. Like, verbatim out of your mind. Wow.

I think that's what happened to you. And I was such a fan of y'all. Like that world of drag where, you know, Kim Chi, Trixie. Me. Bianca Del Rio. Like the clowns The clowns Yeah

Did you ever have you ever had sex in that clown makeup? Just once Okay What was it What was it giving? Miss Piggy Well From a one to attend

Did you enjoy it? I was just happy to meet my dad Oh I'm just kidding I've never met my dad Next question But when I met you It was this big beautiful

elaborate Like theatrical Chinese New Year Disney presents It would take me like six hours To just do my makeup And then another hour to get dressed. And the makeup was so big.

It's too much. Everything that was sharp was sharp and everything that was blended was blended to death. Six. It would take me six. It was like an eight hour day just to get ready. And then I had to turn the camera on. Oh, my God. Well, you showed up on my feed in your new look doing drag, transvestigate, drag vestigations.

Dragvestigations. Questions? I added trans. Transvestigation. Drag investigation. Basically the same thing, honey. Only your voice is how I even picked up, is this her? You didn't even recognize me.

No, because I've met you out of drag and I've met you in drag. But I hadn't seen you in this kind of glamor-puss version. Like more of a woman, more soft and feminine. Well, I'm going through a metamorphosis like Hillary Duff. I'm like, I'm going to be a woman now and I'm just going to do, this is the face that I got. This is very Hillary Duff. I'm just going to go, right. This is Hillary Duff.

Right. When she was out in Rome, living her. life in the scooter with Paolo and Paolo was pounding her down. I'm over here getting, I'm getting pounded by Paolo, bitch. I'm over here getting pounded by Paolo. And so now I'm just a soft woman with a little bit of makeup and just being feminine. But also, well, first of all, it still takes a lot of skill to put on this beat. We're making this sound like this as a, who cares.

The stones are so bewitching. Yeah. And it's not like, girl, when I put on these fucking stones, these like, these like, plastic, go to the obstetrician. Do you use like the cheap, like Hobby Lobby, the crystals, the big colors? Well, whatever's on the floor in the studio. Whatever you can find, she's not bothered.

These are so, they've got like multi-tones. They're so bright. They're so, they're bewitching. Thank you. I look like I have like, um, iridescent moles or like, or like, this is gorgeous. Well, I'm from Texas.

You know the Texas girls they put on. Where in Texas? I'm in the south, Rio Grande Valley, Brownsville, Texas. Oh, I've been to Brownsville. No, you have you really? Yes, I fucking have. What's the gay club? there? We had, we've, girl, they've all closed. We had like, Studio 69, Valentinos. Um, oh, girl, I don't know.

I did show there once. Jinks did the same theater once. Or it was a bar. I, I did it there. And it was right up, at the time that is the closest I was to Mexico. Yes. It's right there. It's the five minutes. You could just cross over. Yeah, a little piece of trade down in Mexico. It's not near San Antonio. It's like four hours south of San Antonio. Where I'm even, I'm all the way down. I thought San Antonio was like right next to Mexico. Brownsville is the city when I tell people I've been there Texas people go

you have? They act like it's a remote thing unless you have a reason to go. Yeah. Do you like Dallas? I love Dallas. I love Houston. I love San Antonio too

because San Antonio is just so Mexican. And it's so pretty. The river walk. The river walk is very pretty. San Antonio is pretty. Every fucking city in Texas that welcomes drag is so cunt.

They just fucking ugh. You got your... Well, they're nice to your face. because they are bitter about it That's okay when I leave, they can be bitter Yeah, the girls in Texas They're very old school

Like you gotta be wearing rhinestones And sequin and huge hair And you gotta be wearing clown white You gotta be paint You gotta have a little black on the cheek Like they don't play Wow So if you're if you come in there

You're just wearing a little blush And a lash They'll be nice to you But as soon as you walk away They're like, did you see that brick She had no makeup on She's from Rupon Straggar She got all that money

She got no mug on Like that's what they would Protect the bricks Yes, it's, I mean, I do think in Texas, I always felt like, because I wore a lot of makeup, it was like coming home. Because the other girls had, maybe not my level, but people wear a lot of makeup. They're the drag queens. With a huge pageant. I mean, it's a huge pageant hub, too.

No, but have you ever seen the, when they go to pageants and then they do interview during the day and they're still blasted? Oh, my God. Like, they don't even look human. And I'm like, bitch. The best is. The best is when they have in their daytime drag. And they still got the black in the cheek. I live.

I love when they have their out of drag. interview looks and they got to they got to draw on their men's brows for the first time it's wild sometimes they even do the beard too because they haven't been man in decades yeah and then now you got to be a man so when you try to do it it's like baby that looks like a strange human being yeah i love that you know what i mean it's Halloween it's Halloween it's Halloween yeah one of our Boston drag means used to do pageants in Texas she's like famous for same you got to be a man girl honey and her her her her eye popping man And look.

Well, it's because at some point we got to be men. Well, but it's very little Richard is what it often gives. Yes, it's very. It's Liberacee, Little Richard. Libragette, little Richard. It's CD.

It's a cross-stresser who lives her life during the day and you know the cross is there. Right. As much as she tries to hide it, she's crisscrossing. Well, there's the CD. During the day at night.

You know what the giveaway is? The six inch acrylics and the braids down to the back. And you know, she's got long hair. No, I do this. I do this. I have long hair. and when I'm like, okay, I'm going to go to the gay club. There's going to be men.

They're all going to paint me dust, but I got to try to at least see if there's someone that's into me. So I put my hair in a little bun and then I try to find a way to hide the bun so that I don't look so fam. Because if I go to the gay club and they see me with hair with long hair or a little bun, automatically they're like, that's the woman. What about one of those little fezzes or like a Dixie Cup? Yeah. Right. Something. Right.

I got to hide it with a Dixie cup or something. A pilgrim hat or a snatched ponytail. Well, I guess that's worse. Maybe I need to just shave my hat and start wearing wigs. It's actually fierce. Wigs. Like boy wigs. Male wigs.

Oh, oh. Men's wigs. Dude wigs. No. Get into it. Dude wears my wig. Get into it. You should come out with a line of wigs, call them dude wigs.

And then your clientele will be all the creatures around the world who struggle to present as male. I would, I need to be a spokesperson for the creatures who struggle. Please. Who's going to stick out for the creatures at home who can't present as men? You gotta help them out. If you want to talk about creatures who can't present as men looking for their struggle leader.

Who better qualify it? I mean, I was born in this struggle. It's her. It's always been her. There's something magical about the first true breath of winter air during the holidays, the way it slips into your lungs

like a song you forgot you knew. Up in the rugged serenity of Newfoundland's jagged coastline, where cliffs brood over the Atlantic and the sky wears a perpetual shimmer of pearl and frost, I stayed in a weather-beaten but perfect cottage that felt out of time. It was the kind of place where the wind itself seems to tell stories, where the scent of sea salt mingles with wood smoke, and where the quiet is so profound,

it feels like the world is holding its breath just for you. And somewhere between my trek into town for dinner and the soft drum of ocean waves against the ancient rocks, it struck me. I could be hosting my own home on Airbnb. My place is sitting empty while I wander these silver coasts, but it could be working for me. While I'm off tracing the edges of the North Atlantic and befriending every rugged fisherman in sight, my home could be someone else's winter sanctuary, a slightly warmer chapter in their holiday adventure.

And honestly, with my next journey already inked into my calendar, a Christmas pilgrimage to Germany's chrystal markets, it simply makes sense. And as I wander through Munich, wrapped in scarves and snowfall, my home could be helping finance the guest room remodel I've been dreaming of, all while welcoming travelers of its own. And it's not just me. You too can host your home on Airbnb. It's a practical way to earn a little extra money when you're away, letting your space become part of someone else's travel log. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.c.ca. At Dejardin Insurance, we put the care in taking care of business. Your business to be exact.

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Find an agent today at Dejardin.com slash business coverage. Canada's Wonderland is bringing the holiday magic this season with Winterfest on Select Nights, now through January 3rd. Step into a winter wonderland filled with millions of dazzling lights, festive shows, rides, and holiday treats.

Plus, Coca-Cola is back with Canada's Kindest Community, celebrating Acts of Kindness Nationwide with a chance at 100,000 donation for the winning community and a 2026 holiday caravan stop. Learn more at canadaswunderland.com. You did make up on We're Here.

I did make up on We're Here. It was so much fun. The entire time that I was there, I was a student. I was learning what to do, what not to do, what, what, how to challenge myself with makeup. And learn also like, these girls are working. Let me tell you, when we were on, we're here, these women, they were putting them to work. I could, I would last 10 minutes on this week.

They were outside for 12 hours in the sun. They were making them run around in these small conservative towns. Never. It was a challenge, let me tell you. And they were supposed to save the towns? Who would have destroyed them? They were going in there And they were having to save the town

Through the art of cross-dressing That I know that's a So you know The girls It was a challenge for the dolls That sounds like science fiction Maybe I obviously have been a fan

I was a fan of your old style of drag And then when I discovered your series Which felt like it came out of nowhere And it came so strong and fast My algorithm sucked it up like Like anytime you post anything online Instagram's like We got you boo

Here she is because I do watch and rewatch all your shit. And I share your shit so much. I also think Instagram. You're so supportive. That's so sweet. You just eat so fiercely. Well, it's because you're, it's weird.

Thank you so much for that. But I also, you know, you are a queen. You're in a position where you could pay dust to all these creatures out there. And she will sit there and she'll shout me out. She'll share my things. And that's like, that's amazing that you do. It's performative. No, for me to even stop and comment like a little while.

Can you imagine? I never comment. But your shit, I always. I always have to say like... Thank you for that. So you're good with that. You're very good with that. When did you pivot to this like glamor-puss version of your look?

So I think with everything going on in the world, where here ended, I started to see that like the doors in Hollywood for, you know, drag queens were closing, especially drag queens who do makeup. And then so I went home and there was like a year where there was no work. And I hit rock bottom and I got to the point where I was like, bitch, I got no more money to even. pay my bills anymore. Social media doesn't work. It's not working. I'm not working as a makeup artist anymore. I had an Emmy. But, you know, that Emmy, if you don't, if you, if you think the Emmy's going to make it for you, the Emmy, when I got home, I was like, this Emmy doesn't mean anything.

I got work to do, bitch. Ain't nobody going to come over here and give me a job, especially I was living in Brownsville, Texas. That's not going to happen. But you got a star on the Walk of Fame in Brownsville, Texas. And the key to the city. The key to the city. The key to the city, bitch. But I had to crash and burn and hit rock bottom. And I was at a party one night.

And it hit me. I don't know if it was the psychedelic. I don't know if it was the trade trying to come from me. But there was a moment where I was like, what am I doing in this house with these absolute monsters? These people. But very valid. A lot of people ask that question in my house. If I don't get my shit together, this is what I'm going to end up as.

The cross-dresser in the corner waiting for the trade to come over here and talk to me. And I said, sweetie, this is not my path. I will not live a life that I don't deserve. Thank you, Pearl. Literally the next day, I started track investigations. I put my makeup on. I said, how can you do this with the skills that you got, but make it easy? You can do it by yourself because I run in there.

I film myself, I edit myself. I do all, I'm a one woman pony show. Hell yeah. Who's filming when you're like in the parking lot talking? Do you have your phone set up somewhere? I set my phone up in my truck. I have a little clip. Of course, she got a gimbal.

She got a backpack. It's all. It was, it was that sense of like, I can't rely on anyone. I can't ask anyone for help. I got to be able to do this by my own because I got to be able to run this marathon. Yeah. I have to be able to do this every day if I have to by myself. Well, that's a drag.

I mean, that's an old school drag thing. You're everything. I taught myself to, in my mind, I was like, bitch, no excuses. You don't have an editor, no excuse. You don't have an assistant, no excuse. You don't have support. You don't have anyone that believes in you. Bitch, you believe in you.

And you're going to go out there. You're going to do this. And so I went out to Ulta, and I started running around just shopping, which I did every day. That's what I was doing with my friends every day. But now I was just putting a little wig on. And now I was going to the Didi's discounts. Love Alta. To the Marshals, to the Ross.

Where real people go, too. I'm like the real people. Baby, the real people are going to the Home Depot, honey. And they're getting. They're doing, that's where the majority of people, especially right now in America, it's like, bitch, can't nobody go to Dillard's? We're going to Target. We're stealing. The majority of people can't go to Dillard's or Neiman Marcus or Saksith Avenue.

Baby, the girls are at Target. They're at Walmart and they're stealing everything. Goodwill. Honey. And Goodwill can be really slight. That's where I get a lot of my Halloween decoration, Christmas decorations, because the price of holiday decor is so. monstrous and crazy. Yeah.

Get the used holiday decor. I went to an indoor swap meet the other day, and I bought a foundation that was $2.99. And let me tell you something. It's more sickening than my Dior foundation. My Dior cost me $70. The L.A. colors. $3 foundation. It's sickening.

Those designer foundations are bullshit. It smells like house paint, but it's sickening. The L.A. Concealor, yeah, that's good, too. It gives you cancer, but you're kind. I mean, we're all going to die of something. Well, you do my makeup one day. I would love to. Someone has to.

I would love to, but just know that I'm going to give you the 5, 6, 7, 8. I'm going to put a timer 45 minutes, and you're ready. Well, you know what? I'm going through an era right now where I feel like less is more, do it fast, just make yourself look good, put on a lash, and let's punch. Yeah, okay. Let's get out of the makeup chair, sweetie, and go out there and live our lives. Yeah, 6 hours is a little too intense for me.

It's too much. Well, I will say there's a sweet spot where it's like, for me, longer than longer than an hour and 15 minutes with the brush in the hand it's a depreciating asset I know what I can do

in like an hour so the longer I sit there it's like jerking off it's like edging for what and then you're all tired but you gotta go work after right so you can't sit there forever yeah if I do that

what I'm dealing with is father time so the longer I take to put on my makeup the more my face reminds me that I'm an old creepy-skinned ag it starts to go in the wrinkles Yeah, so my window of freshness is about into the craters. Two hours.

How did you think of these little isms that you edit into your, like that type of shit? How does you think of all those? Because they, they hit, they're so, they're so numerous. It just happened by accident. They're so numerous. Do you edit this? I edit it. You add all those yourself.

I have a microphone. I, actually those audios, I don't know what, I don't remember what I was doing. Terror. Those audios are two years old. It was a whole year Using yourself as like a sample I was doing it I must have been doing a YouTube video

Like two years ago And I was recording like an intro or something And then I was like I'm just gonna I just started going Now brick Don't do it little girl You look like a creature The D O double L

No you know what This woman she looks like a D OG And so I just There's a whole like three minute audio that's two years old. And so then one day, as I was editing my videos for TikTok, I was like, I'm going to put in these audios after every little cut that I do.

And it became a thing. It's amazing. Now that they're constantly like, Luscious, when are you getting like a button that has all your sounds? They're unrelenting. They're unrelenting. DJs are hitting me up.

Can you send me the audios? I'll pay you for the audios. I'm like, wait a minute, bitch. No, you need to manufacture your own little sound machine. Like a fashionista track of you yelling. I would be good on a bitch track. You would be, like a fat, like we need to do a bitch track together. We would love.

We would go in. Like a nice, sexy, hot, like, runway track of you being like yelling, yes, no, maybe so. Right. Your version, the sexy version of Pat. Yes, no, and maybe so. When the girls try to rip you off, that's what they're going to be saying. But now it's getting to the point where now they're like, my dedications from my videos, they're putting it to tracks. So now these Fagis are at the club and they're like, honey, have you ever been in the dark room, honey?

make some noise for the dark room girls who are getting gutter punched in the dark and like they're using all my sounds on these like tracks. Yeah, drag tracks. I love it. But you know, I was going to say that's definitely not eating your lunch. It's not taking anything away from you.

Oh, no, I love it. I love it. If it brings, that's what I'm here for. I want to bring joy to these kids. You know, they will literally, in the DMs, I've gotten videos where like they're having sex with each other, like destroying each other.

And they're playing my video in the background. And you just hear me in the back. Girl, I went to the OTA today, girl. Let me tell you this concealer was not giving. Meanwhile, the F.H, he's going in, boom, boom, boom, pounding this little bottom. Can you imagine you're getting pounded? You're hitting the poppers, girl. Your eyes are in the back of your head and you just hear me in the back now.

Don't do it. Don't do it. That brings you joy. To me, that's just like, you know, queerness. But you know, when I watch your videos, I think I've seen all of them at least once. you also appear to be enjoying yourself I have a question about there are times where you clearly grab some person

Like there was one video where you grab this lady And you and her are sitting on a display outdoor furniture Just having a chat Yes Like it was like a Gail King and Katie Perry Sitting down for a post space chat What do they think when they see you What do they think when they realize you're filming

What do they think? Well you know I do it on purpose I the whole point of my show is I'm a drag queen I'm a cross-dresser but I can exist in these places and I'm not here to harm anybody just running around shopping

so I love literally sometimes I'll grab my friends and I'm like let's go to the Ross and we're going to go find a seat and we're going to just turn on the camera and just Kiki like if we're at home because the conversations

we're having sure they might be gross and disgusting and stupid but girl we're not hurting anybody sure no people get queer people deserve to be able to be visible and exist in any space. Sure, some gay people our conversations can be a little risque.

We might be a little piggy sometimes with the things that we talk about. But that's how we process our trauma, bitch. I saw this video of you talking about it. I saw this video of you talking about it. You were talking about like... Kevin Hart. You were talking about like if you...

Like, you were saying like straight people are mad at us for the way we talk rough, but it's how we process shit that you put on us. Absolutely. And that was so illuminating. Honey, listen, they will sit there and they will criticize us. Oh my God, these queer people are pigs. They're so promiscuous.

Look at the things they do with their booty hole. Honey, we do the things we do because of the trauma that you've put us through. Since we were children, you've told us you don't love us. You don't see us. You don't want us to exist. You want us to change everything about us. You reject us. You put us through so much pain and trauma.

And now as adults, this is how we process our pain and trauma. And guess what these motherfuckers are doing behind the scene and getting their assholes blown out. Blown out, honey. You think these conservative Republicans, they don't got wigs and panties and dills in their closets? Lindsey Graham. Honey, Lindsey's getting pounded. Yeah. Probably two arms.

By the housemate. All this furniture. Let me tell you something. I just had a vision. Something tells me the housemaid comes up. It's on the glove. It's on the Crisco. Boom!

And Lizzie's just there getting her life Getting a massage She can't sit on a bar stool Sweetie It just goes Baby well honey at this point Can we? Honey

I was talking about this the other day What are we going to do When we reach 70 years old Our booty holes are going to have no grip Listen Imagine the grip I have I can't even fit a medium size

A butt plug on my ass Anymore? No just period She notoriously as the tightest hole Tighter than a clamshell Stop it I could have sworn you were like one of these extreme anal play girls. Well, all my friends are.

Really? Neither of us really. No. Really? Like, I'm a bottom, but I'm like a Madam Alexander doll. Oh, wait. Like, I'm, like, I'm very, I'm very wholesome. We're going to be fully in love and then it's going to be one pinky and I'm going to be like, oh my God.

You know, like, I need a, I need a little bit more of a secret garden. Are you the clean girl? Like, you got like the sanitizer on the side. You don't want the smells. You don't want the sense. You don't want the colors and the liquids and fluids and fluids. I'm not in the mind. I didn't spend

like the years. It just never appealed to me but I support the Ranthru dolls. Right. I have your shirt. This is the Ran Through dolls. I bought three of your shirts. And I accidentally bought multiples of the same ones.

From the darkest corners of our imagination comes a game show that's more ridiculous than terrifying. Welcome to Tickled To Death, I'm your host, Roz Hernandez, and I'll be guiding guests through the creepy questions and chaotic games,

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public menace. And this is Yacht mess. We're diving headfirst into the wildest, cringiest, and most chaotic corners of travel and pop culture. From celebrity meltdowns and hot viral stories, to vacations that went from five star to somebody called the Coast Guard. When two friends are talking, the guard comes down and the truth flows. Oh, we're going to get in some trouble. This is going to be a yacht mess. New episodes every week until Daisy falls off the boat again. Hey, pop culture junkies. I'm Ryan Bailey.

I'm the host of So Bad It's Good. It is your one-stop shop for reality TV, prestige TV, celebrity news, and interviews. Now, pop culture is having a huge spring. Bravo's The Valley is exactly the hot mess of broken marriages and suburban shade you hoped it would be. Season 1 of the Valley walks so season 2 could get hammered and throw punches. We're also closing in on the Emmy deadline with Hacks, The Last of Us, Only Murders in the Building, and Seth Rogan's really fantastic and really funny, the studio, all-in-coming. And I kick off every episode with a few minutes of late-breaking celebrity news or some deets from a screening or a red carpet.

I mean, come on, I covered the Oscars, people. So search for so bad, it's good on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube. Stay bad, batties. I follow the accounts of like I will say the gentleman who get like a second hand wedding gown and walk around their kitchen Oh Gwen

Megan Megan Megan Lauren with a Y Yeah follow these girls and you would think The comments would be like Girl you need to brush your hair Or but the comments are like So beautiful So just

Yeah The comment that's very I love it Supportive I love it Because they get the selfie stick in the kitchen And then like Yeah

Well you know people will lie to you Especially on social media Well, but they also These are like straight men's Alt accounts that are dedicated to following cross-dressers where all they do is comment on the girls and say You look amazing. Oh my God, can we talk about this?

The cross-dresser, the panty-snifers and the DMs. Oh, yeah. I'd be getting so many messages. The other night I got a message. It just said, can you help? Can you help me please? And I said, oh my God, is this man? Okay, what's wrong?

So then I text back, mind you, why would I even respond to this. Love you. You're tagging you for the community. Do you need a supportive referral? He had one follower, bitch. Alanya Van Zant. She's like,

yeah. I said, honey, are you okay? What, how can I help you? He said, can you suck this deck? I said, well,

sweetie. Are you, are you close? Where are you located? But it's these panty snifers, they'd be hitting us up. The famous queens on the, on the Instagram.

Yeah, but they hit you up but they don't follow through though. My, my, it's like the grinder trade that they, what they really want is they just want you

send the picture, send the video. And they're, like, they're giving you the fantasy that they're going to come over, but they're just at home. Mama, they're jerking off to your picture. They should all be sent to jail 25 years. No parole. But you know what it is, too? It might also be your home girl.

Because you know the girls, too, they all go on Grindr. I don't care. But no, but let me tell you this. There are girls who they go on Grindr and they'll pretend to be trained so that they can get, like, let me get her tea. And so they log into their alt account. No, they don't. 30 years, no parole.

I had a friend who would do that. She would go on Grindr and she would be trying to, she would be like, okay, she's trying to get trade, she's trying to get trade. Let me go. Let me get her picks. Let me get her picks so I can get the tea. Meanwhile, they're just playing games with you. There ain't no trade, baby.

What a trade ain't coming. What a hobby. Get a hobby. Well, you know the girls are not. Some of the girls are just not wow. People aren't happy. Macromay. Like, people aren't happy.

Trauma. They're not happy. Pain. Pain. When they see you out here. The girls are in pain, honey. But when I see you out here. living on, I hate to say, like living out loud, living your life. And the thing what I think

is so compelling about your videos is the confidence, the comfort to go into any space and truly the focus is not, isn't it outrageous that I'm in a home depot? Right. The focus is on like, aren't these other people really fucking weird? The situations around, you're like the, you're the straight man in these videos, like you're the normal mind in these videos and the world around you is plucked and crazy. Are you going on the Home Depot buying Hickory Smoke engineered hardwood? Well, I went to Home Depot to look for trade. Because you know what? The Home Depot, you can find a man. Do you know what the one? You know what the one? They got the hottest man at the Home Depot. Have you ever noticed? The second floor

parking lot in the Hollywood one? I haven't been. So are the girls. That's where they cruise like ground zero. Oh my God. You should just go to the second floor of the Home Depot here and sit in your car and check out. Well, you know, I use now that I'm a public figure. I can't do this any more. But I used to love, I would have to, like, change my face again and wear a whole different wig. Redhead.

Hopefully I end up looking. I'll probably look like Daddy DeVito and drag. Just do some Clark Kent glasses. Rice. Rice. No match, just glasses. And turn the bob inside out. Yep.

But let me tell you that. Turn the bob inside out. And they'll live. Let me tell you, the trade does not care. Mary. Oh, girl. They don't care. They don't care.

Have you ever had trade? I know, I know you have it. You got traded as a woman on Craigslist. She's the original perpetrator. She gives me Craigslist girl. I was the only Craigless girl. This is Craig, baby. It was her lady.

It was Craig and that's her list. This is her fucking list. My dreams were my whole self-esteem, my whole, everything was shattered because I would do, I'd put on my ad, go in the shower, paint fiercely, do the show or not do the show. And I had three in a night. Three in a night. You know what? I've done that, though. I have prioritized trade over going and doing a video or doing a show.

Things I need to do. Wednesday night for $60? No, thank you. You're your own boss, though. But you know what happens? It goes back to we're in pain and we just want pleasure. Well, but here's the thing, though. This was the gag.

The gag was that I thought I was cunt. I thought I would put the effort in. I look sexy. And on, I had an 11 a.m. appointment with this guy, a paid gig. Not 11 a.m. During the day. Yes. And I overslept.

The people have families in 1045, I, I woke up. I was like, oh, my God. I'm so sorry. I'm going to need a couple of hours. I just woke up. He's like, just put a wig on. Sweetie. Can you believe? Oh, I believe it. It's crazy. It's happened. I was devastated.

Mr. Burns over here in the Dakota fanning wig. Okay, but did you ever, like, do your makeup, you're getting, you're putting on your lotions, you put your wig on your fishness, your lingerie, and you look in the mirror and you're like, bitch, creature. Never. You always felt the fantasy. Yeah, because I had no lights on. No lights on. Okay. Very, very dim, low light.

Okay. Because if you turn the light on, you know they'd run away. No, no, no, listen to this. So after we fucked, and about 10 minutes in, all my makeup was on their ass. Right. So, like, I looked like, who done it. Right. But we, there was a couple of guys who would chill afterwards, really, like, evolved guys.

And one man had the nerve to tell me, if I saw you out during the day, I would have no idea you weren't a woman. You know that man probably was a little blind. A little blind? But can I also say? He suffered from something. Glaucoma. When I worked at the makeup counter, people would come in and the

they would be with their boyfriend or whatever and the boyfriend her husband would say, I don't like girls a lot of makeup on. And remember this one time, this woman said, well, who do you think has not much makeup on? And the gentleman, her husband boyfriend said, Megan Fox. And that was a moment where I went, as stunning as she is, of course, the woman's dipped. She's in drag. Dipped like an Easter egg. But straight men have

no idea. She's wearing more makeup than me right now. Straight men don't know if you have lashes on. They don't understand anything. They don't know about foundation. They don't know about trash. But they think anything on the eye is mascara. You notice that they call anything here is mascara. Anything here is lipstick or lip gloss. They don't know about pencil.

No, I'm on nothing. Yeah. Well, straight men are just stupid. They're boring. I was so surprised because the bar is totally in the basement for a lot of these guys. They just need a vague shape of a woman, a silhouette and that's enough

for them just get punged. Put some earrings on a saguaro cactus. Just turn around, put a wig on, put some fish and some panties on. Or you throw a wig on a fire hydrant? Bent over. down the street to fuck that thing. But you know what makes me think of when I was grinder and stuff and you see that person on a grid where you see the small crossy and you have to click because you have to see it. But then they see that you've looked at their profile.

So then they message you and you go, oh, no, I was just looking at you. But not in a sexy way. I just had to see what was up. And it often really is like Drew Drogey as Chloe Savinny. And you're like, well, I have to remind myself, that person probably has no issue. Because again, the men don't care. The men don't care that you put on your cheekbone. highlight. They don't give a fuck. They want the wig

and the dick. They just want a receptacle where they can just drop their load in. All the way around. Oh. Most of the time. Oh, you were dropping. That she was dropping. She was dropping it down on these men. It's my first time. Hot Dog down the hallway. Girl. Mary. Let me tell you. Waxed.

I've never done this before. I had a trade the other night. First night he came over treated me like a woman made me feel like I had ovaries a vagina everything treated like a woman

yelled at you yelled at you yeah completely he had no rights he was a misogynist right he leaves

two three days later he's like I had so much fun can I come over again but this time I want you to play with me and I said wait what do you mean sweetie put you in what are you talking about sweetheart

put him in no he said I have some toys see well, okay, let's, you know, I'm a sensible, futuristic woman. I understand the world. You're woke. I understand.

I'm woke. Right. I understand the world. I know that I understand that man liked to play with their anal cavity too. Did he bring out a fire hydrant? He brought out this toy that was a replica of a horse. Brownsville. Mind you, he was a pro.

I put it in and I said, wait a minute, this is bigger than mine. This is bigger than the toys I use, honey. I'm over here playing with. The kiss, Shetland ponies. The kiss to death is like, we don't need Lou. I'm over here playing with my little pony. He was over here with, what's the spirit, black stallion?

Yeah, gargantuan. Right. Raging Stalin Studios. He took it all to the tilt. Didn't even complain, no noise, nothing. And he turned around, I said, do you like it? His eyes were in the back of his head. He said, I love it.

I said, these men are not well. They're in pain. You know what, these men are in pain too. trauma. During trauma and they come to us so we can give them pleasure so they can feel good about themselves. Can you imagine the pressure and the pain that society puts these men through? It's true. And the part of them that is perhaps, let's say, let's be generous, transamerous or open to it. That part of them is so stockpiled with the shame of every, first of all, they already like hate women. They hate gay people. They hate themselves for secretly jerking

off to any version of between the two. Right. Right. So. they are trying to push through their own layers of armor, discomfort, whatever. They're trying to push through, but the whole time they're balancing out the extreme shame, the extreme... It's because no one gave them permission to just play

with their ass. If, listen, if we lived in a society where when you're born, they say, listen, you can play with your penis, you can play with their vagina, you can play with your booty hole too. If all the men in America all of a sudden just started playing with their booty hole, I think that would

We would reach world peace. Well, also, I mean, I was watching this lecture talk about, I mean, way back like Sparta, ancient Greece, and there was no word for homosexuality. All the soldiers fucked each other. Oh, absolutely. But there's no identity. Right. They didn't even have the word. There's no word.

And there's so there is no stigma. And so there was no, I feel like we don't need, I feel like these sexual identities are helpful in, in a repressed society where we need to find each other. But in a perfect world. It's because we're born and immediately we're put in prisons. You can't do this. If you're a man, you can't do this. If you're a woman, you can't do this. They put themselves in so many prisons and that's why they're so bitter.

Bitter. These bitches are better down. Honestly, the truth is I think about this all the time because I always get tagged on like lips of TikTok or all these places and it's always like me and Jimmy Kimmel reading the kids. I know that's inflammatory whatever. Right. But I'm always like, what is the hang up? Obviously you hate gay people.

Right. And I guess you could go religion, whatever. But something about cross-dressing is so inflammatory. What about Louis the fucking 14th? Girl. The queen. It's all presentation. It's all arbitrary too.

In this world, in order to do what you got to do, you have to present a certain way. We are just so free and we are not imprisoned that we can present ourselves any which way. When we can be a man, one day we can be a woman. We know how to use all the tools at our disposal. to gain power. We teach ourselves to become powerful. Right. Because if we were born and we followed their rules and we stayed in their prisons, we would have no power.

Yeah. Right. They wouldn't care about us. They wouldn't respect us. They wouldn't accept us. They would pay us dust. And they get bitter that we figure it out. We set ourselves free and we come out here and we're like, bitch, I'm going to make some money.

I'm going to buy that house. I'm going to buy that car. I'm going to make my dreams come true. And I'm going to do it with a wig and some lashes, bitch. And you're going to be bitter about it. And you're going to have to turn on the TV and see it. And you're going to have to listen to me, talk about how if you just started playing with your booty hole, your problems. Let me tell you, tell all the straight men in America.

They love our show. If you just started playing with your booty hole, you would solve so much of your trauma, your pain. Yeah. All that stress. Release the pain. Maybe just find a cross-stressor and have her put a dildo in your ass and you will live your. life. That is a

That's a great political platform. That's what they need to do. Obama change. You know what I mean? Let me tell you something. Donald Trump. If he just, if, Melania,

if you just started to introduce ass playing into Trump's live. What do you think? He might just, you think she hasn't? You think he already doesn't? Oh, I'm sure he's had that nasty ass punched up. That nasty,

flabby orange ass just wrecked. He's probably one of the, you remember back in the day they used to, always say that gay people would like put gerbils in their ass? Richard Gere. Donald Trump is, he has that gerbil in there. The gerbil is in there.

And the more damage you are, the animal gets bigger. It's the capoeira. It's the small pig. Honey, what, at this point, honey? It's like a, what is it the hyena at this point? Guinea pig. Honey. Something.

Sweetie. But, but like, I always think about it literally these fucking idiots who get so hung up on drag, if they just open a history book and went back three, four, or five hundred years. Right. The fucking king of France looks like you.

Oh, honey. Do you know what I mean? It's like all this shit is arbitrary. Because you know the mug was busted. Well, yeah. You know back in those days, the makeup was not cute. And sweetie, he had, he was, he was, he was, uh, he had so many fistulas. Stop it.

Black ooze coming out, the booty hall. From all the ass play. The court, the people in the court had to wear, sent it. Because they probably didn't even clean the toys. Oh, girl. It was probably wooden toys. They were just shove him in his ass. That's when you had all those boileds and fistula's and things.

How did you, how did you decide on the wig you wear in your videos? How did you decide in the little Door Explorer wig? Because it is kind of a quick little, jazz master's calls it the door they explore. Yes, Dora the Explorer, absolutely. I am Dora and I am exploring and procrastinating the world. Let me tell you. But it really came down to ease of use. To me, a bob can last forever.

You can suck dick in a bomb. I love the fucking bob. You can run around in a bob all day. You can hide your bag of Botox. As long as you've got your low brush, you're good. You can wear jewelry. Because realistically, I'm out there in the real world. If I was wearing one of these wigs running around the Ross, people would be like, what's going on there?

Because it's also very low key. Like somebody could be a few aisles away and at the corner of their eye, they see your hair right now. To the corner of the eye, they're like. Right. And then it turns into like, what are they filming? Is this a filming? People could see you and they realistically could be like, is that some lady? I, for the most part, I get completely ignored.

No one cares. No one's bothered that I'm just running around in the aisles, shopping around for things. Like, no one cares. But, which I'm glad, you know, I don't want to be out there, like, having people come up to me and being rude to me or trying to like, you know, I don't want to hear their bullshit. I don't want to hear their ignorance. Yeah. I'm going to read them down if they ever try it. But I'm glad it hasn't happened.

And for the most part, they leave me alone. But the bob, to me, it's easy. I love that. We always, I always travel with the backup bob. Yeah. It's always like, it's easy, breezy. Yeah, and it always looks good. And it can last for years.

My backup bob is Bob the drag queen of. I don't feel like doing the show. I just grab her. Can I say to you? I also think in a lot of your videos, maybe you're playing with the audience, but a lot of times men are noticing you. Yes.

She can't go in these stores without being like, well, he just craned his neck to look over here and look me up and down. The men are interested. It's because these men, they, well, first of all, yeah, and they see me, I'm done up. I'm wearing cute hair, you know, like they, there's a lot of men that are just feminine attracted. Right.

I have a theory. I feel like human beings are not actually attracted to a penis or vagina. They're attracted to either femininity or masculinity. For sure. And so men, even if you don't have a vagina, but you're giving femininity, they're going to come over here and they're going to try to get it. They're going to come over here and get this piece. Right. Because they're attracted to the femininity.

There's been moments where I'm just male presenting, but, you know, I obviously look like a big old F-A-G. I got my brows down. I got my hair and a ponytail. And they will hit on me. Right. Because they know. Well, you're also in your little, like a Gaga just dance.

Right. But they also know they're like, he's going to go down on me. Right. And I bet he has an amazing hairpiece at home. Right. But I would love to see. Right. They know we're going to give him a show too.

He wants to borrow some jewelry. These people are not stupid. They know the dolls, the girls, you know, the drag queens. We're going to give them a show. I love doing a little. In or out of stage, we're going to give them a show, honey. And they know. I do that showgirls thing in the pool.

Ugh. Oh, oh, oh. It's so, it's thrilling. And that's just you at home. Yeah, with nobody there, yeah. The other thing is, I guess, if you're filming with your phone, too, you can be so discreet. People walk by shopping don't even know that you're filming. Yeah.

And I wear my little microphones. I put them in my bar, my titties. And so I'm walking around half the time. I'm reading them, tooth, like, down. I love when you're on Ross. And they don't even know. You're like Ross and you're halfway across the store, but the microphone is so clean. So you just see her head bobbing walking through an aisle, talking about clothes.

And her voice is clear as day. It's so security footage. It is so under the radar. So these people also, the way your camera set up, they must think you're just talking to yourself. Yeah, yeah. They don't know what I'm doing. They don't, and half the time these people, they don't care. Girl, they're over there.

Their food stamp. They're trying to come for their food stamps. They're shopping. Honey, they're struggling to put food on the table. Their wife, honey, ain't giving them no cookie in a minute. So then they see me. I'm walking around with my little purse, my little bob, and I'm like, yes, honey, don't do a little girl. In their mind, they're like, oh, she's going to let me have it.

Let me go over there and talk to her. She's going finger my booty. Bitch, you know, I'm going to go in. Do you ever feel unsafe out there filming these? No. It's great. That's inspiring. I'm also very like

You got your gun In my mind I actually I don't have any weapons Maybe I should get one But I'm just very like Bitch You don't own the world

You don't own the world You don't own the planet You listen You can be conservative You can be crazy Stay on your ranch Don't come over here to my house And tell me I can't do the things

That I need to do To live my life bitch And we're in a public place Let me live my life I'm not hurting anyone I'm just running around the Ross I'm looking for a size 11 shoe. Do you got it?

Right. No, I will not take 10 and a half. And it's wide. Do you have a wide bitch? Because I'm a big bitch, honey. A big shoe. Right. And if you don't got the shoe, honey,

I don't even need to talk to you. Get out of my face, sweetie. I got to go. Let me go on over to the marshals. Let me go over to the marshals, sweetie. Damn. What stores can we look up to? I'm not bothered by these people.

What stores are you going to next? Oh my God. Well, there's, I don't even know it. I've been everywhere. Have you done world market? I have. I feel like that would be ripe. Oh, I need to go to...

Yes, they do. They got strange food. Strange smells. I want... That would be a fun video. The Grove. It would be strange, too, because I'm not, like, one of these older men that has a weird obsession with dolls. I'm not that girl.

Right. Me neither. But you know what I mean? But it would be fun for me to walk in there and be like, girl, what's going on over here with these dolls, you know? I think in a... I don't know one adult man who collects American girl, because they're not. not chic. They're not giving anything. Right. They're not, they're not, they're not cutty. They're not like Barbie.

Little gait tooth, you know what I mean? Like a cholera-ridden Emily. Yeah. It's like, with historical storylines. But you like Barbie. You don't like brats. No, I don't like brats. I don't like brats. Those are ran through. Brats are for horrors. Brats are for horse. Yeah, brats are for whores, but it's like a whore that she doesn't

really care. It's a cookie monster pajama girl. Right. No self-esteem. You know what it is. It's for that girl. She wears those tarantula nails and the, the, the, tarantula lashes. And they're like one going this or one the other way but she, in her mind she's turning it. Yeah, she's turning it.

I've been watching that show, Yonla Van Zant Fix My Life. Is that her name? Yeah. Elanian. Not on my watch. I Yonla. And a lot of the people, she primarily aids women. Obviously there's men there because men are often. She gives AIDS to women. No, she helps the women. Yeah, yeah. And some of the lashes being presented on that show are

egregious. It's just like one this, one this. One this. One this. There's no symmetry. The blinking. It's just like almost bright white blue strip. Does she ever do fix my lash? At this point, they're doing the Trixie Mattel liner with a lash. I know, but also this show was from like 2000, like 10 years ago now. Right.

So it wasn't, I mean, I think lash technology is better now. Was that, she was the one who was like, is that something you want? Well, let me tell you, you never get it. Never going to get it. Yeah, it's really fierce. The other day she told all these women, she said, all these women were like, oh, my husband hit me. Oh, these women, the other day, 30, they were 14 women there. And they all had been pregnant by the same guy.

Oh, Lord. All together, he had 38 children. He has the time. And she said to them, well, first of all, it's like pregnancy abuse. I'm like, this is crazy. Second of all, she said, all of you need a Bob. You know what a Bob is? And the girls were like, and she goes, battery operated boyfriend.

Damn. Yeah, she said y'all are too horny. Three of the women were pregnant at the same time with the guys. Oh, my God. And I was like, this man needs to be put in jail. I will say though low-key It makes me think The nut is good

He must be good He must be putting it down real good What kind of magic dick does he have? I'm over here like Is he on Grindr? Can I find him on Grindr? That sperm count is through the roof You'll be the next pregnant woman I want to be the next one

The pregnant woman He might be able to get me pregnant finally I've been trying for years It never happens. It doesn't stick When the drag is so good that you miss a period Honey Honey Girl

Well then you start getting scared If you made your period You know, I told my mom I went to the LGBT center, you know, to go get tested for all the things. And I'm explaining it to my mom. And I'm like, mom, it's like me going to the gay gynecologist because she doesn't understand it. Like in her where she doesn't understand that, you know, we are gay men and we have different needs and are we need a special doctor that, you know, is going to take care of our body. It's like a gay gynecologist. He goes in there, you bend over.

He goes in your ass and checks in. Scraps the barnas off. Scraps everything off. And my mother, she was so lost. And I was like, the only way to explain, it's the gay gyno. Yeah. Yeah. Honey.

What do they think of your wonderful success? Well, luckily, no one recognized me. Or they knew me, but they're, you know, they're trying to be professional and they don't want to make it weird. No, I mean your mom and stuff. Oh. My mom is trying to be. I thought you're talking about the doctor, bitch. Well, they rolled out a red carpet for me at the L-A-L-GBT Center.

No, I do think if you are a gay, gay, gay even. like celebrity. Right. It is more, it's more, it's slightly embarrassing to go get testing because people do just like. Oh, it's very embarrassing. Yeah. Yeah, you get there and you're like, bitch, they know I'm the doll. But then I'm like, well, fine.

If people go home and tell me that I'm, if people go tell their friends they saw me investing in my sexual wellness, tell everyone, bitch, I'm not ashamed. At the same time, you have no privacy. I will say though, now they give you the little test tube and they're like, go in the restroom to yourself. But I do remember like maybe six, seven years ago. I would go to the doctor and my gay doctor would be like, okay, bend over, pull your pants down, bend over, and he would swab me. That was embarrassed.

Mary, I got, I was a study member in the vaccine for HPV for men, years and years and years ago. Oh. And when I tell you, the swabs that this motherfucker did, it was like I killed his whole family. He would jam it in and then, like, it was trauma. Did it ever come out dirty? He broke it off in my head. Okay. Well, you know, because the swamp, sometimes you stick it in

and as clean as you think you are, honey. When you go in there and you say for ten seconds, twirl it for ten seconds. Sometimes you'll see a little speck of something. I don't confuse the brown swab. Okay. Either it was probably dark red. Okay. Blue or something crazy.

Okay. Girls out there, you see? Our swab comes out dirty too. Yeah, I went to, once I had a little something, something going on, and I went to the clinic and the nurse or the doctor was, like oh yeah this is definitely that and we have some medical students here who would or saying that is it okay if they come in and I said spread your ass no absolutely the fuck not thank you very much yeah and then the medical student oh my god katie I love you that's what I was

afraid of they would have got you it would have got you my proctologist somebody in the office told me that they were a fan and they and they said it after they had already seen everything and I actually was just like well now said to me wondering if you know if I see like an earing. I'm like, what if they're gay? I think it's unprofessional. I kind of felt better. I did feel better. Sure, but I think it's unprofessional. I was like, oh, good, you know. And to you. So there is a line for you. Well, I think it's like, I'm a big fan. So that to me says, that person's going to go home to their significant other, be like, oh, I just scraped off some herpes off a cocky's cunt today or whatever. You know what I mean?

Like, like, that's, that's what I. She had a fissure and I closed it up. Yeah. They got you. Well, we're can everybody, if everybody wants to join on the joy train, which is watching your content, you really are the best. You're the only person doing anything like what you do. It's just amazing. And you're by far the most beautiful guest. Everybody before you, dogs. Brick. Brick.

Just DOGs everyone. DOGs and BRICs. Because you know the girls nowadays, they're tired. Yeah. They're lazy. They have no inspiration anymore. Why do they try to quit? No one looks.

I mean, you said this earlier. Lazy. No one looks different. No one is a just no one. You know what? it is, they don't believe in themselves. Bitch, if you believe in yourself and you accept yourself the way you

are, you don't make excuses, you don't apologize, and you just are you. Really you, you radically accept yourself, you're going to be an original. You're going to be in a real, I love that. Yeah, what was that with that whole cliche, it's like, be you, that's the only person that nobody else can do it.

Yeah. Baby, there's people out there, they got those humps in their back. Goiters? The girl, yeah, baby, we need more. Bricks in the world We need humps and goyers and drag It's been enough we got it skinny people we got it pretty people we got it We're done we're tired you're boring

We need fucking scary creatures out here just being glamorous Giving us everything The humpback buck toothed goitered up And that's where I come in The girls with the dark in between the thighs with some skin tags Bring it out little girl I want to see it That's what I live for Those tags

Baby sweetie Put a ribbon on it The palette the skin tag palette The collab Yeah Let's do a collab Skin tags and dark in between the thighs

We can do different shades of brown We can do different shades of brown Different shades of like red For you know when it's irritated We can do all that girl It would be a sensation Right so neck braces cover up like weight Press the number one in the comments

If you would live for the brick palette With the skin tags And the dark in between the thighs The dark in the neck honey The palette for the girls Who's feet swell Baby let me tell you the feet The girls

The Pallus for the Elephant Telet Titus girls. Make some noise for the elephantitis dolls. Diabetic sucks. Yes. People can find you. They save lives. They save feet. People can find you at Luscious Massacre Everywhere, right? A Luscious Massacre Everywhere. My show is called Drag Investigations. It's on YouTube. And I'm running around just, you know, being a woman in the world, minding my business while I'm, you know, being very shading. I think you are like the best thing that's happened in a dragon five years. Oh, my God. Would you please? I'm not, I'm not serious. Would you please do my makeup? I'll pay you.

I would love to. We'd have so much fun. It would be coming. I'm telling you, though, I'm going to put a timer. It's going to be 30 minutes. 30. You said 45 before. It'll be 30 minutes.

But that was 15 minutes ago. But let me tell you this. It will be one of those trademarks. You're going to look so beautiful and so delicious. You're going to want to pull some trade. Like me and Scott Barnes did me. I'm going to go right to the doctor. But let me tell you something.

Did you see? You would have pulled trade in that mic. Of course. You would have. You would have. The trade would have. The trade would appellered you down. Till your, till the.

Eyes watering. Elmer's glue started, like, cracking up and turning into op me off. I looked. I looked like Ann Colter on HGH, but I felt, I felt it. I was, she faced with me, I took about 75,000 screenshots. And all the pictures were me walking in different lines and going, but wait. But can you believe that is the same man who does J-Lo? Yeah. It just goes to show you. It helps to look like J-Lo. It helps. That's a really good helper.

J-Lo does a lot of the work. Yes. It really does. Thank you so much. Yeah. Thank you for having me. Thank you so much. You're the best thing.

Thank you. Okay. You are the best thing. You're the best thing. She's the best thing. The best thing. Bye. Pod's over.

Canceled. On a recent fall trip to the wild, wind-swept majesty of Nova Scotia's rugged coast, I stayed in a home I booked through Airbnb. It was so breathtaking that I felt myself carried away on the briny scent of the Atlantic, the low murmur of crimson and copper leaves swirling along ancient cliffs, and that hushed enchantment of stepping into a seaside cottage that warms the soul. And somewhere between my twilight wanderings along the weather-beaten shoreline and my dinner with a local fisherman, a thought swept over me like a top.

I, too, could host my own home on Airbnb. My place could be welcoming travelers while I'm away, perhaps even helping to fund the New Year's voyage I'm planning to Greece, where I dream of greeting January beneath the white stone chapels and the shimmering acheon sky. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.ca.combe. I'm Daisy Callagher.

She's chew from below deck on Certified Lover Girl. And I'm Mark McNamara, world traveling director, game show host, former charter guest, and according to the authorities, public menace. And this is Yacht Mess. We're diving headfirst into the wildest, cringiest, and most chaotic corners of travel and pop culture. From celebrity meltdowns and hot viral stories. Two vacations that went from five star to somebody called the Coast Guard.

When two friends are talking, the guard comes down and the truth flows. Oh, we're going to get in some trouble. This is going to be a yacht mess. New episodes every week. until Daisy falls off the boat again. All right, y'all, gather around because Monet exchange from sibling rivalries is here with an announcement.

This episode of the podcast is brought to you by Google Gemini. Now, listen, the girls over at Google said, Monet, tell the children, so I'm telling you. US college students get Google Gemini's pro plan free for one year. Use the best model in the world for multimodal understanding,

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Picture it. Monet exchange in the library, uploading a picture of my music theory homework like Gemini, please, help a diva out. Or recording my rehearsal videos for feedback instead of crying at the practice room for three hours. This would have been life-changing. Now, back to the goods.

Sign up to get more access to Google's most accurate model Gemini 3 Pro Unlimited Image Uploads, Pro Level Image Editing, Higher Limits in Notebook LM, Gemini in Gmail and Docs, 2 terabytes of storage, and more. You heard me, 2 terabytes! That's enough space to store every vocal warm-up, drag race look, and every photo your aunt sends you of her plans. Visit jemini.comgoogle slash students to learn more and sign up Terms Apply. We've been called reality star fame horrors. Icons, memes, masterminds. But now we're calling the shots.

This is the fame game with Spencer and Heidi. Our most entertaining and real conversations yet. We're talking music, comebacks, Hollywood tea, pop culture, hot takes. You get behind the scenes of everything from real life outside reality TV to new projects plus questions and comments from you. Just us, more unfiltered and raw than ever. So if you've been here since The Hills or you're just tuning in for the tea, welcome to the Fame game where there are no rules, just receipts. Subscribe now to The Fame Game with Spencer and Heidi on YouTube or wherever you get your podcast.