The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya - Sapphira Cristál's Chicken Carbonara For Two with Katya (Part 2)
Episode Date: October 1, 2024Step 1: Locate an impossibly gorgeous man in South Boston who's family owns an Italian restaurant. Follow him home and heat extra virgin olive oil in a heavy frying pan over medium heat. Add pancetta ...and garlic and saute until the pancetta is brown and crisp, and you're hard as a rock, about 8 minutes. Step 2: In a large bowl, whisk together the cream, cheese, yolks, basil, and penis to blend. When ready, proceed to insertion into said gorgeous man. Step 3: Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil over high heat. Add the spaghetti and cook until you finish, about 10 minutes if you think of something awful like your 5th grade teacher Mrs. Shield's thick, lustrous goatee. Once finished, ensure that both you and the spaghetti are fully drained. Step 4: Add the chicken to the pan with the pancetta and stir to combine, as you prepare yourself to receive the gorgeous man inside you. Next, add the spaghetti and the cream mixture and toss over medium-low heat until he creams, (do NOT boil or you might end up scrambling his eggs). Season the pasta to taste, sprinkle his nuts with lemon zest, and serve with a generous topping of parmesan. Feeds two. (Part 2 of a special 2-part interview!) Need a website? Check Out https://SquareSpace.com for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, go to https://www.SquareSpace.com/BALD to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://BetterHelp.com/BALD and get on your way to being your best self! Stop putting off those doctors appointments and go to https://ZocDoc.com/BALD to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today! Follow Sapphira: @SapphiraCristal Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch the podcast on YouTube: http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: http://bit.ly/baldandthebeautifulpodcast To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: https://trixieandkatyalive.com To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: workinggirlsbook.com To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: https://www.trixiemotel.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hi divas, as you know, Trixie is on break.
So I'm solo here on the podcast to tell you
that we are bringing you more ball
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of other East Coast cities that I don't have
on the script in front of me.
But all tickets and info will be at TrixieAndKatiaLive.com.
So get your panties in check
for the best damn podcast you've ever seen.
We're back with Safirah Kristal for another,
this is part de, the remix, the shequel.
This is the bald and the beautiful.
I'm bald, she's beautiful.
Part D was Safira Cristel.
Welcome back.
Thank you for coming back.
Thank you for having me back.
You're back, back, back again.
And we were just talking about,
yeah, we were just talking about
the early days of Drag Race
and just being a bitch.
Being a client.
Girl, I just remember, I loved those days.
That's, I mean, that's, I loved watching it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't know if I would've made it
to be a part of it, honey.
You know what I would've done?
I would've shrunk into the background.
I would have, you would've seen a different beast, actually.
And that's the reason why I'm glad
I was never on those seasons.
Your claws would've come out?
Oh, not claws.
I'm a scary person.
It is terrifying.
And I really I've gotten the therapy for anger management and have really like gotten it.
But I'm a big person and my dad's a trainer for the UFC.
I know how to fight.
I also know how to argue.
My parents were, baby, I am not that girl.
I am the girl that you do not want to try, baby, I am not that girl.
I am the girl who you do not want to try at all
because I will make you cry.
And bleed.
Damn.
We won't even get to that point.
You'll be crying before you start bleeding.
Fucking A.
Well, shit.
I mean, yeah, the early days of Untucked
and all those iconic moments are so cunty,
but I don't have the, I can't fight with people.
No, I think it's, it's also, it's just,
so straining to your energy.
Like my body, after I've been in a fight
or I've been in an argument, I'm just like,
oh, that was too much.
I can't do this anymore, but I will whoop that ass.
Do not.
You are tired from whooping that ass.
From whooping that ass.
I, it's always interesting.
The fighting is, I'm not a fighter.
I've had very little arguments with people
and I'm always amazed to see like couples argue
and then time is what usually is the,
things just get better with time.
Like, you know, you get less.
And dick.
Well, right, but I mean, oh right.
Every once in a while you just.
Oh, the anchor sex. Fuck it out.
You fuck it out.
Fuck the pain away.
That's true, I forgot about that.
Baby, if we have a fight.
Break up sex, yeah.
I used to be like, we're not fighting, let's go.
Like, one of my rules for relationships
was once we start arguing, clothes come off.
I'm not mad if we ever do it.
Oh, you wanna argue? Let's take our clothes off and see how we feel.
That's amazing.
Yeah, and then we just fuck it out.
All that iron energy out, and then we can just talk.
You know?
Incredible.
Yeah, you know.
Yeah, it's like, you just raise your voice at me,
pain is dropped. Take them down, take them yeah, it's like you just raised your voice at me panties drop
Take them down. Take them down. Let's do it. Oh you wanna fuck
So you really want to fight
Oh, let's do this right now, honey
Imagine if that was the this if that was the unofficial strategy on Drag Race Untucked. Would you say you bitch? Drop the panties.
Let's go.
Talk about a smackdown.
Yeah, seriously.
Oh my God. We were talking about jocks last time you were on.
I don't know if you've ever did the hooking up in drag or all that stuff. We were talking about jocks last time you were on.
I don't know if you've ever, you ever did the hooking up in drag or all that stuff.
Girl, I have a song written after me.
Wait, what?
So do you remember we used to have that show,
that night at Machine called-
Was it on Mondays or-
Humps.
Wednesdays.
Wednesday pumps. Humps, yes.
For the girls.
The girls and their admirers.
For the girls and their admirers.
Yes, for the gentlemen that love to worship the girls,
the dolls.
Mm-hmm.
And you know, every once in a while someone would come,
and there's this guy who came to pumps,
and I took him to the coat check and did some things.
I let him know what time it was
and then he let me know what time it was.
You read him the riot act.
Honey.
And then he read you the patriot act.
And then a song was made.
Then you made sister act.
Well, you know, he has a sister now.
Then you turned him. Turned him out. has a sister now. Then you turned him.
Turned him out.
Like a werewolf.
I that I that is unfortunately since drag race pretty much that
that element of getting into drag, that the allure of maybe something sexual
or sensual or erotic is happening has pretty much evaporated.
Yeah, it's hard to do.
Especially when you do this
all the time to work.
It's just like, there's no, and also there's no,
for me anyways, there's no like,
there's hardly ever an element of feeling pussy.
Oh.
If you feel the opposite of pussy nowadays,
you feel like, I don't know what the opposite of pussy is.
You feel like a beat up granny.
Maybe you do, but I feel like a gorgeous woman.
I don't feel like the puss, a sexual being in drag
that I used to, especially, you know, drag is so big,
my drag is so big now, and I'm like,
people see me and they're like,
it's not even like they're like sir,
it's just like who's.
It's larger than life.
It's larger than life, it's superhuman.
Yeah, it's not, you can't even imagine
like what it would, how you would even get
to the bedroom with a man.
Well see they come to the door and they're like,
you know, here and then they see me and they go.
Uh-huh. Oh, I'm too gorgeous for you.
Yeah, that must be what it is.
Yeah, you're too overwhelmed by my beauty
to have an erection.
Yeah, that's all the blood is going to your brain
to kind of process.
You're bringing your heart and your soul, honey.
Yeah, but I miss it.
And I miss those little excursions.
Especially in Boston, man.
My God, those little excursions. Especially in Boston. Oh my God.
Those little excursions pump Wednesdays
or Wednesdays and Thursdays at Jocks
were always the night where typically
there was less action on the show side of the bar
and more on the mingle side of the bar.
By the pool table.
On the bar, yeah.
And it was always, I would tiptoe down there
in a very accessible outfit.
No pads or anything like that.
Like a circle skirt with a flare,
with no panties underneath.
Back in the day where you could have a straight body
and people were like, oh, I love that.
Yeah, whatever, it doesn't matter.
You certainly weren't getting photographed
and you weren't on stage or anything like that.
Ultimately, they did not care.
They don't care.
That was the ultimate gag.
I'll never forget, it was so bittersweet
when I learned that they just want like,
it's like in the cartoons.
Put a wig on your fucking.
Put a wig on a mop pole.
They literally want the pole and the mop.
That's all they need.
They don't care.
They don't care.
I had a paid gig for this guy, a hooker gig, you know,
and it was scheduled for 11 a.m.
I, yeah, you know, he was good and the money was good,
but I overslept and I woke up at 10.30
and I was like, fuck, and I texted him,
I'm sorry, I'm gonna be late.
He's like, just put a wig on.
And I was like, excuse me?
Excuse me, just put a wig on?
And I was floored because I was like,
I've been going through all this. And I could've just put a wig on. I could've just had a wig on and I was floored because I was like, I've been going through all this
and I could have just had a wig on.
But at the same time, so I did put a wig on
and I did not enjoy that.
Yeah, I mean like.
I did not enjoy, I had to get in the shower
and shave super smooth because I'm not doing a wig
and five or like a beard.
Yeah.
And I know that he would not want that.
No, I mean, they want you to be smooth.
They want you to, they want the illusion. They think that they the thing is they think that
they know what you're going to look like without the makeup. And then they see it and they go,
oh, yeah. When they've made I've had certain requests made and like, he said,
do you have any black hair? I was like, you don't want me in black hair. No, don't look. You don't want me in black hair.
You don't want me in a brunette wig.
It's like, I know what you think you want,
but I cannot provide that fantasy for you
because I will look ugly as hell.
Honey.
And in the whole, like,
he wanted me to be like a brunette cheerleader.
I was like, that's not me, Mary.
Like, it's not gonna happen.
But yeah, it was, it's always humbling.
And then, you know, it's always really humbling
when you talk to your girlfriends
and realize that y'all fuck the same guy.
And that the guy has gone to every drag queen.
Every single one of the girls.
Some of them looking like dogs.
And you're like, oh, you can't.
So it's like, because you want to.
Because you thought you were that girl.
You thought, you knew you were that girl.
You knew you were her and you knew that you were she
and that you thought that at some point, girl,
I'm taking the same girl that these everyday women
are getting and I am, you know, I'm on the occasion, girl.
And then you realize that they know how.
Yeah, nothing special. They could have, you put a wig on a dog on the occasion, girl. And then you realize that they know how.
Nothing special.
Honey, you put a wig on a dog
and they would have just gone to town.
It's so humiliating.
And so that's why, at a certain point.
That's why I stopped really caring about what they want.
Well, I stopped telling people.
I started caring about what I want.
Okay.
You know, I started going, okay, as long as I get off,
I don't give a what's going on in your brain.
Sure.
Why do I care about that?
Yeah. Also, what going,
sometimes what's going on in their brain is so outrageous
and outlandish, such as, I was told a couple of times that,
you know, if I know, I was told a couple of times
by this guy that if he saw me out on the street like this,
he would never know that I wasn't a woman.
Okay, girl.
And I, I was like, we had just done it. So he had, he had, he had already done it.
And he was saying this and I was like, I crossed my leg.
I turned on the light a little bright and I said,
I said, what do you think now?
Would you care to repeat that sentence? And it's just so crazy. I said, what do you think now, sir?
Would you care to repeat that sentence?
And it's just so crazy, it's so crazy.
I've woken up with, sometimes back in the day,
yeah, sometimes back in the day when I was in Boston,
there was this really beautiful eyes and just bottom down.
And he was, and I fell asleep in my house
and he fell asleep next to me.
And I woke up and he was going to town on me.
And I was like, oh, hi.
Well, good morning.
We gone?
I don't know.
I don't remember if I even had a wig.
I probably did, but you know.
I had one sleepover where I slept in drag.
I slept in drag all the time.
And not just because of that.
You just fell asleep?
I just fell asleep.
I'm in drag.
Okay, that never happened.
Because if I'm sleeping in drag,
the next morning is the night of the living dead.
Yes.
It's the night of the living dead.
Oh, and he did not care.
He went to sound.
They don't care.
It's so, well because I always forget,
like when I would hook up with these guys,
the first 10 minutes, all this makeup is gone
because my mouth is so suction cup to their ass.
Oh baby.
All Russian red lipstick, all the Derma Blend,
all the contours on their ass.
It's right in there.
Yeah.
It's like a stamp print.
And then.
You should take a picture.
Yeah, I mean.
Put them around my mouth. It's like a stamp print. And then, You should take a picture. Yeah, I mean, put it around my house.
It's all gone.
So, and then they don't care.
And I always wanted to get in their head
because I do care deeply about what they look like.
Like,
Deeply.
Like if you come to my house
and you don't look like what you said you were gonna look like,
You're not coming in.
You can go.
Yeah.
And because of, I'm sure you agree that in Boston with the supply and demand,
we were picking tens.
Yeah. Yeah.
Tens. Tens.
I'm talking if you you line up the men.
Hello. You line up these men that we have had sex with in drag in Boston.
And if most gay men had to rate them one to 10,
I'm telling you, a lot of these guys would be 10s.
They'd be like, you had sex with that guy?
I was like, multiple times.
What?
That's the most attractive man I've ever seen.
Yes, multiple times.
Multiple times.
Multiple times.
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Did you ever think that,
one of my favorite stories,
and this was years ago, so it doesn't matter anymore.
There was this guy and he had a family
that had like a family restaurant
and he was staying in the,
family restaurant and he was staying in the like the apartment that was above the family restaurant.
We went upstairs, he took me, when I say gorgeous, this man was
beautiful. Body, just built, face, of Adonis, just so pretty.
He took me upstairs, number one is daytime. face of Adonis, just so pretty.
He took me upstairs, number one is daytime.
And I'm like, oh shit, god damn, okay.
So he takes me upstairs and he goes,
do you want something to eat?
And I said, I go, what?
My family has the restaurant downstairs.
So he goes, and I was like, oh, it's an Italian restaurant.
I want some chicken carbonara.
Love chicken carbonara.
I go, he goes downstairs and gets me chicken carbonara
from this restaurant.
And when I tell you that's the best
motherfucking chicken carbonara I ever had in my goddamn life,
this beautiful man fed me and then took my dick all day long.
And it was so, and then he was like,
at some point he was like, oh, can I fuck you?
And I was like, this is the days when it was happening.
I said, sure.
And at some point I turned around
and his penis wouldn't stop growing.
I said, how big does it get?
He goes, I don't know.
And I don't think he did
because it wouldn't stop growing.
I was like, is there a balloon attached to it?
Like, what is there a problem?
Like, what's happening here?
It just kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger.
And I tried and I did, but,
and it was lovely.
It was very, it was very lovely. And I think about but... And it was lovely. It was very lovely.
And I think about him to this day.
Back in the day, there was a...
He didn't have the Southie accent.
He was South Italian.
So he didn't have the Southie accent. You know that...
Well, my guy was Southie Irish.
Oh.
So this dude, his...
Oh, that's so fucking harsh.
This motherfucker was 22 years old.
Yeah.
And he could go five times.
So this is, it was unbelievable to me.
I would never come because once I come as a rap,
I'm blowing on hot Camelot tea, I got rollers in my hair,
I'm pointing at the door.
And so he would bust like, so we would like go at it,
go at it, he would, the man was never soft.
No.
Never soft.
No. Hard as, hard steel, the man was never soft. No. Never soft.
No.
Hard as, hard steel, dick as hard as steel.
You could hang off the edge of a cliff holding on one hand
from this dick.
It was so rigid and firm.
He would bust and then we'd smoke a cigarette
in the apartment.
And then I would, I would start to massage his shoulders.
The dick starts to rise immediately. That's crazy. And then we'd start to massage his shoulders, the dick starts to rise immediately.
And then we go at it again.
Five times was the most we ever did it.
He bust five times.
I could not believe that kind of ability
or physical virility, wherever you fucking call it.
Crazy.
Even at 22, I never was able to do that.
At 22 I could do that.
Never.
And I mean, I've had partners who,
I mean, I make a lot of my partners come a lot of the time
and a lot of times.
That's kind of my thing.
I love to watch my partners
reach a climax.
Sure.
And then I'm kind of the same way.
Like once I've come,
Yeah, that's right.
Call it a night, I'm done.
But I also last a very long time.
So it's just like, okay, if we're gonna do it,
we're gonna do it for a while,
and then I'm gonna make sure that I watch you come
as many times as I can.
I mean, my ex, I've probably seen many people come,
I think the most times was like 12.
What?
Yeah. Jesus Christ.
But you know, I have sex with people who-
Oh, right, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.
Not exactly, yeah.
Penises and not penises and everything in between.
Yeah, you know, everyone's,
anybody can write this just right.
Are you over 18?
Come on down.
Well, do I think you're attractive?
You know, am I attractive to you in that way?
Of course that.
I'm not just like, do you have a hole?
Can I put my pole in your hole?
Is it legal?
Is it legal?
Is it legal?
Well, what state are we in?
Shit.
I've missed those days and it's every once in a while.
This happened when Trixie and I went on the road most recently
when I did the podcast.
I was like, oh, you know, this could be an opportunity for me.
I was like, I could post on Grindr in drag and just say, you know what?
Fuck it, whatever. Who cares?
I'm like, oh, but people know it's me. It's like, who fucking cares?
Exactly. Who cares? Oh, oh, my God.
I'm so ashamed. You posted yourself out of grind, out of drag and grind. Yeah, yeah. Oh, oh my god. I'm so ashamed of yourself out of grind
I don't drag and grind. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, it's you bitch. Yeah. Yeah
I'm always on and grinder out of drag sort of but there's something like
Anyways, so I thought about doing that and I could get away with it. I was like, oh, but you know what?
I don't know. I'm so I I want to do it because I just missed that
Well, don't go to grinder. Oh Well, I know, there's other ways.
We're trying to find the men who are into the girls
is not a grinder.
No, they are.
Well, yes.
No, there are, for real.
A lot of closeted guys and whatever.
There's a whole bunch of people on Grindr.
But yeah, it was great.
I used to have this guy who got out of jail.
He was in jail for seven years.
Jails.
Jails.
Jails, marijuana conspiracy.
He was moving large, large amounts of weed
way before it was legal.
And he used to come during the day.
Oh my God.
I think I remember you telling me about this.
Oh my God, he used to wear like a tracksuit
with nothing underneath it.
Just so fierce.
Yeah.
Love that shit.
Townies.
I love townies.
Blue collar, townies, rough hands.
There's just a thing,
this is the thing I had about messing around in Boston.
I got a little over it, I think it was later on,
but when I first moved to Boston,
this one guy came to my house and he had that
southie accent, he was like, oh fuck, you're so hot. Yeah. I just want to fucking touch you all over your body
And I was just like get the fuck out of my house
Get out. It was like what I was like you gotta go
And it was that number one. He didn't necessarily look exactly like okay, but and I wasn't in drag
This is like,
me just out of drag, he was just talking about
how hot I was.
And for some reason, the frequency of his accent
and his voice was so grating that I literally said,
oh you gotta go, you can't stay here, you can't be here. You're not, this is a no you zone, you gotta go. You can't stay here. You can't be here.
You're not.
This is a no you zone.
You gotta go.
He was like, oh really?
And I was like, no, really.
Damn.
Like get the fuck out of my house.
And I just, I really.
What was it about the accent that was so great?
Or is it his voice in particular?
Maybe it was his voice and the accent.
It just gave me this, just like, I was like, I don't,
because I like the Boston accent when it's a little higher.
You know, that Boston, but it was just like,
well, you're fucking hot,
I just wanna fucking put my fucking pants all over you.
And I was just like, and I haven't heard it in a long time,
so it's a bad impersonation, but.
You do it really well.
It was like, I mean, it's like,
I imagine what you're talking about is like a Matt Damon
and Ben Affleck in Good Will Hunting.
But I like the Matt Damon and Ben Affleck thing
if it's a little higher.
You're not better than me.
Yeah, but it was lower.
And it was just the way that he was saying the words.
I was just like, get the fuck out of here.
Come into my house, leave her and come into my house.
And you would have loved him.
If I'm being honest, he would have picked you up.
I had this plumber come once, my God.
Oh, you like the blue collar.
I do, I do.
I don't want, you know what?
It was funny that, I guess looking back,
it was probably something to do with,
it was a little sex addiction-y.
It was a little compulsive.
Sometimes there were three in a row on a Saturday night.
And that third one, it was usually the pattern was,
the first guy was hot and I didn't come, but he came quick.
The second guy was like, okay, I'm still not satisfied.
The second guy was like somewhere in the middle.
The third guy was usually some fucking,
some white collar coke head.
Oh no.
You know, like some like bro who's like coked up
or like too drunk or like, and they're like,
yes, they're leaving the 2 a.m. club with their friends
and they wanna do something, a little taboo,
and then they hook up with me
and they want me to do coke off their flaccid dick
or something and it's just like so nerve and gross.
And they're messy and they got shit ass.
Like it's a whole thing.
And I'm like, oh, the third is never the one.
No, it's never the third.
You never do a third in a row.
Like get a grip, Mary.
I usually would like,
I've always been very particular
about the people I have sex with.
So it's like, have you showered?
I ask questions.
Have you showered?
Are you ready for this?
And when I say, are you ready for this?
You know what I'm talking about.
I'm digging deep.
Are you ready for this?
Are we going?
Yeah, are you, is what is
the earthquake preparedness quotient?
Are we ready?
Yeah, do you have water bottles in stock? Are you is what is the earthquake preparedness quotient? Are we ready? Yeah.
Do you have water bottles in stock?
Yeah.
Like are you hydrated?
Have you dushed?
Have you done the dush?
Have you done the dush?
Do you know what that is?
Do you know?
That's the problem with these quote unquote straight identifying guys is that a lot of
the times they-
Back in the day, yes.
Back in the-
Now?
Everybody knows. Yes, because you can't not know if you don't know what the hell you do.
What are you doing? They're trying to get fucked in the ass and you didn't know.
But back in the day, a lot of guys felt that because they were aroused,
they were clean. It doesn't work like that. No, it doesn't work like that.
No, I mean, I had this dude ass up and as the plane was approaching the runway,
there was the captain sniffed something unsavory.
No.
And was like, what the fuck?
Are you out of your mind?
Like, are you out of your mind?
You want me to dive deep into that fat jush
and it's like not even remotely clean?
Like get out of here.
What is the fuck, what is your fucking,
what is wrong with you?
There was some, I mean, depending on the guy,
and this is back in the day, now I'm just like,
I would rather just sit at home.
I mean, I have a partner.
And, but like, I would rather just sit at home
and do, and watch TV.
Because when it comes to these boys,
it's just like, ugh, if you can't get it together.
But there was once upon a time where I used to be like,
okay, come over, and then if they came into my house,
and they, sometimes they're younger
and they just walked here from their house.
And I'm like, okay, now get in the shower.
Get in the shower, absolutely.
Oh, get in the shower.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Let's make sure that, I would clean them myself.
I would get all up in there and clean all of their body
and say, okay, now you're to mama's standards.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Hello, I'm Heather McDonald, stand-up comic
and pop culture expert and the host
of my podcast, Juicy Scoop.
If you're obsessed with Hollywood romances,
reality TV drama, on and off camera,
and celebrity gossip, this is the show for you.
In each episode, I dive into the juiciest,
most salacious and controversial
pop culture stories of the moment.
And I give my opinion in the most comedic way.
It's based on my own Hollywood experiences,
working on television shows,
and of course my own experiences
with the actual stars themselves.
You're also going to hear from a range of guests,
from actors to comics to reality stars,
like Countess Luanne from New York Housewives,
or Jax Taylor from Bannerpump Rules and Now the Valley.
So if you want the scoop on the hottest gossip, you've come to the right place.
Tune in to Juicy Scoop wherever you get your podcasts. You'll thank me later.
Hey everybody, my name is Bob the Drag Queen. And I'm on Xchange.
And we are the hosts of Sibling Rivalry. This is a podcast where two best friends
gab, talk, smack, and have a lot of funibling Rivory. This is a podcast where two best friends gab, talk, smack,
and have a lot of fun with our black queer selves.
Yeah, for sure.
You know, we are family.
So we talk about everything, honey,
from why we don't like hugs, to Black Lives Matter,
to interracial dating, to other things.
Right, Bon?
Yes, and it gets messy, and we are not afraid to be wrong.
So please join us over here at Silver Ivory available
anywhere you get your podcast.
You can listen and subscribe for free.
For free, honey.
Cause I have a very sensitive sense of smell.
It's extremely sensitive to the point that I'm like,
the door. I love saying the door.
Oh, I love pointing people to the door.
It is my favorite, get out.
Get out.
And then, and then they go.
Follow it, keep looking.
Do not let your eyes, yeah, follow that finger.
What does she point to?
Where's she going? And that's where you're going.
I love saying the door is my favorite thing. Get out. Very empowering.
Well, you know, after be feeling so
underpowered, if that's a word, um, powerless, powerless
from vulnerable, vulnerable. You know, when you're, Powered, if that's a word. Powerless. Powerless. From just-
Vulnerable?
Vulnerable.
You know, when you're just with people
and you're trying to feel your juge
and then all of a sudden you don't feel so great.
Like I've had a threesome once
and they gave me Molly for the first time
and I never had Molly.
And it was,
the one thing about me is I can always get hard.
It doesn't matter. It was like my whole thing. me is I can always get hard. It does not matter.
It was like my whole thing.
Like I can fuck you for hours.
That's like, it was a point of pride for me.
And this couple gave me Molly, straight couple.
And well, she was straight.
He was trying to get me to fuck him
in front of his girlfriend. And so they gave me Molly, cause they were like, yeah, we're gonna do some Molly. Well, she was straight, he was trying to get me to fuck him
in front of his girlfriend. And so they gave me Molly,
because they were like, yeah, we're gonna do some Molly,
we're gonna have fun.
Baby, Molly is a bottoms drug.
Yeah, you cannot get hard on Molly.
You cannot at all, and I did not know that.
And they gave me a lot of it.
And at some point, we're like doing things,
and I'm like, it's working, and I'm like,
oh, this is weird.
I was like, well, while you do that,
while this starts to do this thing,
I'm gonna eat her out and he's gonna like eat me out
and dah, dah, dah, dah.
And then at some point I was like, what did you give me?
What did you do to me?
Because this always works.
Not a great feeling.
What's happening?
Yeah.
And you know, and it felt horrible that day.
And they were like, oh, okay, guess you don't,
you're not ready for this.
And I was like, how dare you?
Later on I fucked him.
Oh, I fucked him a lot.
And it was just like one of those things that I was just like,
you know, at some point, I'm not auditioning for you.
This is not this thing.
You come and this is an experience that you get to have.
And there's no reason for me to ever feel
like I'm the person who should be being as vulnerable.
And so I've gotten to the point where I'm like,
you know, I am the experience.
And if I don't think that you deserve this experience,
you can hit the door.
I am the fantasy.
I am not the one.
I am the fantasy.
I am the reality.
Last episode, I think we got about 12 seconds
into your time on Drag Race.
Maybe this time we got into the-
We've gone back further.
Let's talk about fucking and drag.
I wanna talk, when I watched the talent show
and you're like, I mean, you look so crazy.
You look so larger than life amazing
and you're doing the, what is it called?
O mio babbino caro.
Why was RuPaul laughing?
So because-
Because of the lyrics?
Yeah, the lyrics are, my dear father,
and I pointed right at RuPaul when I said my father.
Okay, I was like, I didn't get that.
So I said, oh, my baby.
And I like, Ru's there, and I was like, oh, my father.
Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
And she just goes, oh, this is funny.
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
And that was the whole point,
it was just like me to call Rue my dad.
And then that's why she goes, why did you come?
Why did you point at me when you said father?
And I said, you know why, daddy.
But while I was like, it's so funny.
It was great.
When did you start singing like that?
I've been singing classically since I was like 12,
13 years old.
Yeah.
How did you start singing?
You know, in church originally.
But like, but these little Bruno, the arias or whatever, like the opera shit.
I went to performing arts high school. I went to HSPBA.
And when you go to that kind of school, they start you with classical music.
And then I went to the Eastman School of Music and studied there.
And then I went to the Longy School of Music, which is how I ended up in Boston.
Okay.
Longy's in Cambridge.
Boston's a big music town.
Oh, so big.
Like there's Boston Conservatory.
Boston Conservatory.
Berkeley.
BU.
BC.
BC, but, wait.
Yeah, BU, BC.
The Berkeley's huge.
Berkeley.
Yeah.
Longy is in Cambridge. It's not even a big school.
It's like two two big mansions. And that's that's did you like going to
school in Boston? No, I got kicked out. I didn't graduate for being too sexy.
Uh huh. Yeah. No, I cursed out to administrators work. I cursed them to
fuck out. I said, fuck!
You kicked them out of your house,
forgiving you, Molly.
I...
You said, you gave me the joke that was like,
did get hard, get out.
No, actually you get out of our school.
That's literally what happened.
Very good.
Is the drag race, when you...
What did, what were you like expectations
versus reality experiences on Drag Race?
Because I have a lot of them
and there's really famously no preparation they give you
for what the experience is gonna be like.
Well, luckily I knew so many people.
I guess so.
I knew you.
But still though, when you go,
it's like there's nothing really
anybody can tell you that.
No, they can't.
I decided to make it what I wanted it to be.
And I'd heard everyone has experience and I said,
well, none of these people are me.
And so I'm gonna do me and I'm gonna be myself.
And I had a blast.
I had the most fun.
It was like, I think earlier we were talking,
it's like, not in prison, but it was like.
It's a forced vacation. A forced vacation. And it talking, it's like not prison, but it was like, it's like,
it's a forced vacation.
A forced vacation.
And it's, it is, I remember saying that.
Whatever the opposite of prison is,
but it's, it's, it's like, it's pleasurable kept.
It's like positive captivity.
What does that mean?
It's like, what is the thing when you go off Mayo Clinic,
something like that.
Rehab.
It's kind of like rehab.
It's the spa. The spa. Yeah. It was the spa. It's a wellness retreat. The wellness retreat. Ithab? It's kind of like rehab. It's the spa.
The spa, yes.
It was the spa.
It's a wellness retreat.
The wellness retreat.
It's the wellness retreat.
Especially for drag, because when you get back,
you feel so much better, your drag is so much better,
your concept of what you want in your life
is so much more realized.
And when you were saying yesterday,
the structure is very,
that is a very positive thing.
Yeah, especially for someone like me, I have really bad ADHD. And so, like being able to
only think about drag, not having to think about my rent, not having to think about
what I was going to eat that day. Like that is a huge one. Being fed, being corralled,
being catered to. It was great.
I loved it.
And everyone's so nice.
The thing is like, I heard so many like,
stories, you'd like watch people's podcasts,
you hear some stories and you're like,
oh, okay, well, I just gotta get ready for that.
And everyone was so kind.
And I just was like, this was kind of not what I expected.
Just because you hear so many stories
and maybe things have changed, I don't know,
but it was a fun time for me.
I had the most, to the point that we were time to leave
and I was like, do we have to?
I could do another.
Katie, Ellen and Erica, three PAs that I will never forget
for the rest of my life. These girls were so fair. Katie, Ellen and Erica, three PAs that I will never forget for the rest of my life. These girls were so fair.
Katie, Ellen and Erica, you know who you are.
You know who you are.
You are the fiercest hoes in the world.
They're the most lovely, wonderful PAs, talent wranglers who are just...
Because you have no phone and you're just focused on what you got to do
and they're helping you do it and they're providing all this,
they're catering to you and moving you from place to place.
Queens walking.
Those relationships are so special and they're so wonderful.
So many wonderful people on Drag Race behind the scenes.
Everyone, I mean, I really loved,
I loved all the producers.
It was just interesting to understand,
oh, everyone wants you to succeed.
And the funny thing about it is when you don't succeed,
it is because you got it in your own way.
And I still attest to that.
And I guess many people who say,
they were doing this, they were doing this.
And I go, honestly, the only time that I had that problem
was when I literally got in my own way.
It was me who was thinking that things, things were happening.
They were not happening because at the end of the day,
they want a great show.
And when you do well, they get a good show.
Yeah.
That's like the best point ever.
Nobody's plotting.
Nobody's scheming.
And nobody wants you to fail.
They really don't.
They don't at all.
Like RuPaul always says, just make me laugh. She just wants to laugh. The ho just wants to fail. They really don't. They don't at all. Like I said, RuPaul always says like, just make me laugh.
She just wants to laugh.
The hoe just wants to laugh.
If you've seen the show, Tamar.
All she wants to do is laugh.
That's it. That's it.
Just, and she, and it's not hard.
And never doesn't want to laugh.
Right.
It's just always, I just, she said it many times,
we're in season 16. If you don't know that by now, what the hell are you doing?
Yeah, it's seriously it's wild.
I mean, in when you do have moments like I think the
the one thing that is really hard to get used to is like the time though
that it takes, because when you pause and have to reposition all the cameras
and you're just waiting there, it is a kind of a strange feeling.
Girl, this is me.
My whole thing was I came here to do this.
Whatever this involves is what I'm here for.
I don't care.
My life was so, I wouldn't say hectic,
but I was a successful drag queen in Philadelphia,
whatever that means.
And it was very hard because I had to drive
to many different places.
And I remember right before leaving to Drag Race,
I was driving to Atlantic City and pulling all my bags
from my car and about to go down.
And I remember thinking, oh my God,
I can't wait to go on vacation.
And vacation being Drag Race. Like I cannot wait to go to Drag Race to vacation
because this is so hard.
And I know that all I'm gonna have to do is the drag.
Like I won't have to lug all these bags around.
I won't have to do all that hard stuff.
I just wanna be a fucking diva.
And that's all I want in my life.
I'm so over that.
You know what the thing I miss the least about life
before Drag Race as a drag queen?
The fucking terrifying gut of churning dread
of waiting behind the curtain at Jock's
wondering if the crowd was gonna like me.
And on a Saturday night after like,
and this happened a lot because it, it went a lot of times very,
it went one of two ways wildly different. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For me.
And I would go say if I was behind it, like, uh,
destiny goes out and performs and I like, um, I hated going after her.
She's so good and so hot and so amazing.
And it was always, it kind of was a 50 50 chance sometimes of like, they're not going to feature me
at all. Really? Yes. And they're, they're, they're, you're unknown. You have to prove yourself every
single time. And sometimes they were not buying what I was selling and it was humiliating.
I was not buying what I was selling, and it was humiliating.
I have had that happen for me sometimes,
even after Drag Race.
Really?
Well, you know, it's the experience of being,
you know, a black queen.
There's like, you have to, and that's just for everyone,
like we have to work seven times as hard
to get half as much respect.
And like, I got as far as one could get on this show
and there are people who have way more followers,
more people who, I remember at some point during the show,
there was a moment where someone said online,
oh, she's gonna be the most unliked winner
because they thought I was gonna win.
They said she's gonna be the most unliked winner ever. thought I was gonna win. They said she's gonna be the most unliked winner ever.
And I thought, well, what the fuck did I do to you?
Like, also, what about me makes me unlikable?
Like, I've been nothing but helpful to people.
I only talk about self-love and how to love others.
And I just operated out of love, kindness, and compassion.
And I don't understand what about that makes me unlikable.
But that's, I mean, there were lots of people
who had a lot of things to say about me.
And I was just like, kind of, like,
it was like, I was awestruck by like the hatred.
And then I was just like, well, this is strange
because I could have given you
a completely different person.
You could have seen someone who is hateable.
And that, maybe you would have liked that person better,
I guess.
Change your costume, change it around.
Change it around, honey.
But I've been in anger management
and I've done a lot of work on myself
and one of those things is to really get into loving
who I am and it's so much easier to have love,
kindness and compassion for others
when you have that for yourself.
And so I really thought like this is the me
that I want to be in the world
and it's been amazing.
The people who love me, love me.
And I love them too.
And that I would not change for the world.
There have been some things that, you know,
were more desired by me, but honestly,
in time things will come and I'm happy about that.
But I've had those same feelings
where I'm like, okay, let's see how it goes.
I'm gonna go out and sometimes there's six people
in the audience and I've just been on national television.
Damn.
And it's like, what just happened here?
Yeah.
It is the competitive, it is a strange thing.
The popularity and because
what what you experience on the
I mean, we talked about this before in
the previous episode, but you know,
the experience of who you think is
going to how you think things are
going to shake down doesn't
necessarily,
you know, align with how it actually
does. And I remember from season seven
what I thought was going gonna happen did not happen.
And what a lot of us thought what was gonna happen
did not happen.
It was received so differently
than a lot of us had anticipated.
And that was really interesting, but I kind of lucked out.
But it's like, it's weird.
Do you?
I don't think you lucked out.
The thing is, I knew from the day that I met you
that once you got on that show, you would be who you are.
You'd be the superstar that you are.
And everyone doesn't have that thing.
Like there are people who are on your season.
They have, the thing about it,
people don't realize is that I have a two inch penis.
And that is my calling card.
Well.
And it's two inches hard, okay?
And people can't come for that.
Or on it.
No, but.
Come with it, there's a lot of things
they can't come for.
It was so, and you were talking about, Naked,
do you, what do you pay attention to?
So this is the thing is I don't typically pay attention
to those things.
That was something that it got through.
Yeah.
It got through.
I don't really look at a lot of,
I try to check for the good ones though.
And so that's the thing is like,
you wanna say hi to people,
you wanna like engage and you wanna be there.
And to do that, you have to sift through some shit too,
sometimes.
And so what I try to do,
I do this exercise whenever,
especially whenever I have these things
and I've done it, do it with me real quick.
We're gonna put our,
put our hands up like this, put them both up,
and then cross them around yourself,
breathe in and say I truly love and accept myself.
How's that feel?
It feels good when you do it.
And it doesn't feel, it's not like a cure all,
but like the more you do it,
the more you like give yourself the love that you need,
because no one can love you the way that you can.
Like the more you'd like do it,
the less all the bullshit really matters,
because these people don't know you.
They're not doing what you're doing.
Also, they're not checking for you, they're not buying your merch. They're not checking for me, they're not't know you. They're not doing what you're doing. So they're not checking for you.
They're not buying your merch. They're not checking for me.
They're not buying my merch. They're not doing anything.
They're not coming to your show. What do I care what you think?
They're not buying tickets. Yeah. It's, it's, it's, you know,
it's talking about sifting through and things getting through the cracks.
I found that even when it's in,
and especially when you have a majority of, of, of positive feedback,
And especially when you have a majority of positive feedback,
your fucking twisted brain will zero in on the...
You'll shush away all of your... Dive through the big lake of positive shit
just to get to the bottom to find that one negative rock.
And then that's the reason why I started doing the self-love.
And then after I do that, especially when I'm doing that,
I start going through the good stuff
and start listening and even responding to those people.
Because when you do that, then they respond back
with something else that's really sweet.
And you start to realize that the good cultivates more,
more of that positive energy.
And I never respond to anyone who has any bullshit to say.
That's good. Yeah. No, I mean, you know, also, you know, it's interesting.
The, the thing that is different,
usually the big difference between a working drag queen,
not on drag race and a drag race queen is the social element of the job.
Yeah. The meet and greet and a lot of times the meeting,
greet experience or whatever,
however that manifests is a,
an expensive item and is like the real ticket is that the thing that the customer
or the, the fan really wants, this is the, you know, it's the show is the show.
And then sometimes what is desired from, you know,
is the meeting, greet experience more than the show.
They want to meet you more than they want to watch.
So sometimes they come to do the meeting great and they leave.
Sometimes they do know because they're, they're anxious people.
They don't want to sit in a crowded, hot, disgusting bar, whatever,
and not be able to see her anyways.
You know, who is the master of that is Bianca.
Yeah.
She's like her,
her, what is that?
Her people skills.
Is, yeah, it's off the chart.
Off the chart.
And she takes time with every single person
and she makes them feel like they are the most important person in the room.
Like you know her.
Yeah.
It's so, so like amiable, personable,
fluent in that language of like direct, warm communication.
It's really impressive.
I think she's a serial killer.
Yeah, she's, you know what, I've stayed at her house before.
She is a really remarkable person
because that bitch is up at sunrise.
She is doing the most.
And she's like, when she's making her costumes,
my friend Andrew just went to stay with her
to help her with some costume stuff.
The way that she's meticulous
with her costume construction is off chart.
She's incredible.
And that's, I, you know, I,
I wish sometimes I was like that.
My brain doesn't function.
Do you make shit? Oh yeah. I made, I mean, I mean. I was like that. My brain doesn't function. Did you make shit?
Oh yeah, I made, I mean, I mean.
I love making shit.
I don't make stuff as much anymore
just cause I'm traveling so much.
But I used to make a lot of my things prior to Drag Race
and then getting on Drag Race, we have to make shit.
You have to know how to at least.
Those sewing machines on Drag Race are horrible.
No, they were great.
You liked them?
The ones we had.
Fucking hated the ones they gave us.
I'm sure y'all had some horrible ones back in the day.
They were horrible.
These shit ass singers.
We have a budget.
Fucking hated that shit.
What are you the most proud of on your season?
Honestly, I'm the most proud of...
What particular moment, challenge or runway?
Okay, I was going to say that I'm most proud of the way that I was able to carry myself, because the...
At the end of the day, I didn't have any enemies.
No one, everyone respected me.
So you were able to fool the girls?
I was able to get goop, gag, honey. They thought that I liked them, honey. So you were able to conceal your lizard skin, you were able to fool the girls. I was able to get goop, gag, honey. They thought that I liked them, honey.
So you were able to conceal your lizard skin,
you lizard bitch.
By the way.
No, I was very happy about that.
Being able to like, a lot of them were young too.
Like plasma, being able to like turn someone
who is really talented
and say, yo, look at yourself, you're great,
you could be greater, and this is how it could be.
And her not to be able to, her not going,
well, fuck you, bitch, but her to go,
oh, thank you for that, for that.
I remember you were telling me at 35, you were the grandma.
At 35, I was the grandma, 34, I was the grandma. 34 I was the grandma.
Like the mother of all.
So funny.
At some point, Tsunami called me
the Morgan Freeman of drag.
And then she'd go, oh wait, no, that's RuPaul.
And I was like.
Cheers.
But I guess I'm most proud, honestly, the talent show
or the talent or the finale,
the art finale performance when I did the orange thing.
I'm so.
That was incredible.
Thank you.
It was like, I was like, my jaw dropped.
Thank you. It was so beautiful.
Yeah. It's so beautiful.
How did that happen?
It's a thing that I've done for many, many years.
I've always worn, like, my thing for pageants
is I'm an opera singer, so I will sing an aria
with a very large thing, and then it will come off
and we'll dance.
And because my whole thing is that I'm not just a singer,
but I'm also a sickening dancer and lip-syncher,
and like, I can do it all, like let's do it.
And I wanted my song to be about self love
and I want it to be about like really
when you get into yourself,
the amazing things you can accomplish.
And I feel like, you know, that number,
people even who, everyone has always said
that was sickening.
It was, it was, it's beyond.
It's just so like, it's just so the thing that I always,
that I, it accomplished what I feel like is so often the,
not able to be accomplished on Drag Race,
which is larger than light production.
Yeah. You know what I mean?
And it was, I didn't miss a step
and that's what I was really proud of.
Didn't miss. When you hit
and you know you hit, it's cunt.
Bitch, when my pussy hit the floor and it bounced up.
And everyone stood up and everyone stood up.
Baby, it beat up that god damn floor, honey.
But when everyone stood up, they weren't standing,
they stood up out of like, they were like this the whole time and then they ended
and they were like, I was like, oh, this is crazy.
Oh, what it like, there's such a like those moments
of undeniable triumph intoxicating.
Not a soul can clock.
And they don't want to because they can't.
The clocks are all busted.
Switzerland shut down.
Baby, if you thought you could clock, you can't even read, honey.
Functionally iterative.
Not a watchmaker in sight.
So fierce.
And then, okay, the last thing, I think the, my, I really liked, I really liked your, I
was talking to Jimbo earlier, on her season that she did, the All Stars she did, Shirley
Temple made me LOL the James Brown character shoe moment in your
snatch game was very funny.
Thank you.
You're wearing a kid shoe.
I said, I don't wear character shoes.
I don't know who you're talking about.
So not much of a wearing character shoes yesterday.
I just saw you.
What are you talking about? Stop now what you were wearing, she was yesterday. I just saw you talking about.
Stop trying to take me out of this character bitch.
I love it.
The character commitment on James Bond was amazing.
Who was the funniest during the Snatch Game?
Probably Plain, honestly.
Oh yeah, yeah.
She was okay.
She was okay.
Yeah.
She just reminds me that I should have done a Slavic character.
I thought I was funniest, but whatever.
Yeah, yeah.
Anybody, who bombed on your snatch game?
Nivea. Oh yeah. Jane. Was she Jane Goodall?
She was Jane Goodall.
So weird.
Baby. So weird.
It was Jane Goodall and then, um,
tsunami is did the go to fairy, which was,
that was, that was not great.
I mean, at this point, Satch Game's tough
because it's like, who hasn't been done, but.
I mean, it's not who hasn't, it doesn't matter.
Yeah, you just gotta be funny.
Just be funny.
You don't have to look like him,
you don't have to sound like him,
you just make her laugh.
Make Rue laugh?
Yeah.
The more you don't sound or look like,
except for, my thing was, Rue was a big fan
of James Brown, so that was my cross to bear.
Yeah, I mean, I think the whole,
I think it's not a satch game,
but it's like the funniest thing about Queen of Flips
with her braces doing her share impersonation.
It's so, I can't even.
I agree.
That is so funny.
I was like, Kermit the share.
So fucking weird.
Yeah.
So fucking weird.
Fuck.
Well, okay, so we got through like 15 seconds of Drag Race
so now we gotta wrap it up.
What now, what are you most excited in your life?
Like what are you most excited about in your life right now?
Well I have good new music coming out.
Ooh, and the radio.
Yeah, we talked about that.
We talked about that.
But I am on the radio.
And I have my new album that's coming out,
it's called The Crystal Ball.
And it's a love fest of music,
and with one thing for the girls who sifted through.
You know what I mean.
Oh.
Yeah.
And I have the new song, Keep It Cute,
is coming out on my birthday on September 27th.
Fierce.
And I'm going on tour in Australia.
Fierce.
I'm going on tour in the UK.
So come and see us.
I think it's me, Nymphia, and Plane in Australia,
and then me, Plane, and Warfien in the UK.
And then I'm going on the Christmas tour
with Murray and Peter.
And Soundcake is one of my biggest,
I think, accomplishments this year.
Me, Monet, and Thorgy, and our director James Blaschko
performed at Lincoln Center to a sold out crowd
of over 2,700 people.
Lincoln Center.
Lincoln Center.
And it was really wonderful.
And my dream is to travel the world doing these concerts
with orchestras. And that's the funny thing is it's a dream that I had a long time ago that Mimi I'm First
helped me like come to.
Mimi I'm First, number three in the voting.
I could not believe it.
Sorry.
The one and only.
And so and then one day when I first when I like when it finally came together,
we talked to Lincoln Center and they said,
yeah, we wanna do this.
And it's just like amazing to be able to live your dream.
So hopefully my prayer is like in the next years
that we're gonna be taking sound cake all around the world.
And that's what I'm most excited about
is being able to sing opera around the world.
Any opera houses wanna have Sefirka Stahl?
Sydney Opera House, we're looking at you.
Sydney, anyone?
Cause I wanna be Carmen too.
That's the thing that I wanna do.
Make sure you follow me on all.
Which is S-A-P-H-I-R-A-I-S-T-A-L.
But also like, stream my music.
It's good music and it's really good for your soul.
It's great.
Give it a stream.
Give it a listen.
Wiggle.
Listen to it.
Wiggle to it, dance to it.
Oh, you're in the car at a red light.
Pop her on.
Pop her on.
Pop her in.
Pop her in. Get it on. Pop her in. Pop her in.
Get it on.
Pop her in, pop her in.
Well, thank you so much
and congratulations on all your success.
Thank you.
And I'm very happy for you.
It is all well deserved
and I wish you nothing but the best.
Oh, well, thank you so very much.
I love you too.
Goodbye, everybody.
Thank you so much.
Bye. Thanks for watching!