The Bald and the Beautiful with Trixie and Katya - Wigs, Weapons & Wisdom: A Three-Act Tête-à-Tête with Trixie and Katya

Episode Date: September 23, 2025

In this impeccably-coiffed episode, Trixie and Katya luxuriate in the cultural gravitas of wigs: those mercurial crowns of artifice, seduction, and spectacle. Act Two detonates with an opulent, penetrating dissection of Weapons, that brooding cinematic masterwork whose themes of menace and morality gleam as dazzlingly as a freshly-honed rapier. The final act pirouettes into both low and high philosophy, as our heroines distill lustrous insights on identity, power, and performance from a sumptuous knot of tresses and manual flatbed trucks. The exceedingly large amount of wit and wonder contained herein affirms that beauty, like battle, demands both audacity and discriminating discernment. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at ⁠https://BetterHelp.com/BALD⁠ and get on your way to being your best self! Go to ⁠⁠https://Hungryroot.com/BALD⁠⁠ and use code BALD to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life! Cozify your space with Wayfair’s curated collection of easy, affordable fall updates. From comfy recliners to cozy bedding and autumn decor. Find it all for way less at ⁠https://Wayfair.com⁠ We’re offering our listeners 15% off their first purchase at ⁠https://ThatAsset.com/BALD⁠ or use code BALD at checkout. Your a**hole will thank you! Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://gemini.google/students⁠⁠⁠⁠ to learn more about Google Gemini and sign up. Terms apply. Follow Trixie: @TrixieMattel Follow Katya: @Katya_Zamo To watch the podcast on YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/TrixieKatyaYT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out our official YouTube Clips Channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/TrixieAndKatyaClipsYT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Don’t forget to follow the podcast for free wherever you're listening or by using this link: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ If you want to support the show, and get all the episodes ad-free go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://thebaldandthebeautiful.supercast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ If you like the show, telling a friend about it would be amazing! You can text, email, Tweet, or send this link to a friend: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out future Live Podcast Shows, go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://trixieandkatyalive.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To order your copy of our book, "Working Girls", go to: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://workinggirlsbook.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ To check out the Trixie Motel in Palm Springs, CA: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemotel.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Listen Anywhere! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠http://bit.ly/thebaldandthebeautifulpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   Follow Trixie: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.trixiemattel.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@trixie⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/trixiemattel⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠   Follow Katya: Official Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.welovekatya.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/welovekatya/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  Twitter (X): ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://twitter.com/katya_zamo⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠    #TrixieMattel #KatyaZamo #BaldBeautiful Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox is an eight-episode Hulu original limited series that blends gripping pacing with emotional complexity, offering a dramatized look as it revisits the wrongful conviction of Amanda Knox for the tragic murder of Meredith Kircher and the relentless media storm that followed. The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox is now streaming only on Disney Plus. The witches are back. Get ready for a spectacular night of love. theater with Hocus Pocus Live, starring the winner of Rupol's Drag Race All Stars 10, Ginger Minge, three-time finalist of Drag Race, Ju-Jubi, season 16 runner-up, Sapphira Crystal,

and winner of Dragula Season 3, Landin Sider! This smash hit is flying to cities all across the nation, so summon your coven and get your tickets now at hocuspocus live.com. That's H-O-K-U-S-P-O-K-U-S-Live.com Hi, Divas, Katja here. Since Trixie is off to Turkey getting those hair plugs because she desperately wants to look like me, I'll take the reins and letting you know

that we're going to be doing our final live-bald shows of the year. In October, we're in Canada, October 3rd in Calgary and 4th in Winnipeg and November 9th will be in Tucson, Arizona. That's right, we only go to the desert in the winter. And on November 13th, we'll be in Honolulu. Oh, baby. Get your tickets now at Trixie and Katia.com. I will hold on hi hi hello why don't you sit here and act like anything that's happened to me has mattered when you're going to sit here with this unit on mama I am what do people say I have no idea what do people in the world so Nick and I have been go oh okay so welcome back so a lot has changed right right Nick and I have we have an understanding that you probably just don't we have a language you won't you won't get it so I'm not

I'm going to go into it. I have a... Nick and I barely know each other. After 300 YouTube videos, I don't know anything about him. Bob, Bob was here last week. She had... Bob who?

Odencirk? Bob Odenkirk. Right. Bob Vila. No. Bob, how would you describe her hair system? Long gray dreads? Oh, Bob had a hair system on too.

Yeah. I had my TikTok hair on. It's this, but a little bit more curly on top. Right. I'm going to. You have two? I have four. You change them, like, switch my wig, make it feel like you cheating.

No, switch my wig, make it feel like it's fresh. Is it glued right now, or is it just sitting? She sat. So, like, if a wind blew, would you really, like, if I, would it go off? Yeah, yeah. So I went to the movies with this on. What if I was fly fishing? Could I catch it?

Absolutely. You could blow her off, honestly. I went to, I had to the movies with Joseph. I had a hat over it, of course. and then the movie was so, like, nuts that I got out of the movie theater. I didn't know where the Wiglet was. Right. It was up in the, it was up somewhere in, like, the, in the hat.

It was a wild ride. I kind of like it. I love it. Like, visually, I accept it more than I thought I would. So it was, it was cut. It was cut by, um, Fiona's lovely, um, friend Gwen. Gwen, yeah, yeah. I know Gwen.

Shout out to Gwen. Mama, she, so when Gwen cut the piece, I, I talked to Phoenix. no hairdresser. I need a discreet, you know, I need a girl who knows what the tea is. And then I had my friend Cameron, who's a fabulous hairstylist, he does men's hair. And so I assume we're going to Gwen's house. I roll up into a salon. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I was like, I walked in there. I was like, I put that little thing on. And she put the little thing on me. And she just, I haven't seen her since your birthday, the Tarts and Vickers birthday party. She was there?

Yes. never met her there. Oh, she was celebrating you and your life. To celebrate life sounds like free and roll, doesn't it? Yeah, I wish it was because that was the best day of my life. Oh, it was so fun. If I had died that night, Mama, that would have been such a good rap. So when you go home, do you like put your keys in a bowl and put this on the, what happened? Well, you know, have you seen that episode of sex in the city, right? Where everybody stands up and goes. Oh, it really did just, is the inside mesh? It's this plastic, right? Okay. I bought one that I was going to do a video with, and I never did it.

It's very expensive. I really like it on you. I really do. Why do you think I'm wearing it? But I thought it was going to be joking. And I thought, honestly, this is going to be one of your little tweaker magic tricks. But I actually really like it. Yeah, I like it too.

And also, I put my friend who has like, he's bald, but has like the Mr. Burns bald, like totally bald, but he has the stuff on the side. Sure. He put this shit on, baby, unclockability. Yeah. Because the roots perfectly matched his stubble. Yeah. I was like, good for you. Bring it up.

A shout out to the rooted dolls. Yes. The rooted bricks. Protect the rooted bricks. You are so tan, too. You just look great. We haven't seen each other in a month. I've been on my break.

And can I tell you, taking a break when it's not a little mentee bee? It's like very nice and peaceful. The mentee be. Yes. It's otherwise known as a vacation. Right. But I mean, it's a boy when I still do work calls and I still. have gigs every couple weeks. So I don't know

what kind of break that is. You still, did you do it. What you're doing a new YouTube series? Oh yes. New YouTube series. I did two photo shoots this week. I have two DJ gigs. I have a live stage reading of an unaired Brady Bunch episode. Like, this is me on the break. My God. But things like

Avita, things that I wouldn't have time to do if I was, if we were doing Netflix all week, I'm not doing a DJ gig. Netflix is the hard one? For me. 12 hours, 10 hours. Hours in drag wears me out. No, no, no, I don't doubt that.

But it's like, I don't, I guess, you know, okay. But when we tape Monday, Wednesday, whatever, and then I have gigs in the weekend, that's when it's really hard. I know that's girl. And so doing things right now that I wouldn't normally have time to do. Like tonight I'm DJing gym class at the WeHo high tops. Oh. Love that.

Wouldn't normally on a Thursday be like, let's do it. They're like, lovely butts, lovely huge butts right in your face. And great food. Thank you. I Thank you My favorite restaurant is high tops Okay

Thank you Sky Club and high tops You always make it about me Oh No How are you doing? How are you feeling? First of all, hello

But most importantly How are you? Thank you so much for asking Baby I was strolling through Miss Kern Kermalima Whatever her fucking name is I don't want to drag her in the mud

I will Okay But she has, she says, when you've got God on your side, or something like, never mind, I don't even want to talk about her. On your side? Like, God is a side? Yes. I was like, hi. Have you ever, wait, do you have you ever, wait, I think you were at this taping, that Sarah Silverman taping where she brought someone on stage and said, are you a Christian?

And the guy said, yes. And she said, would you let him come in your mouth? He said, no, you are not a Christian. If Jesus, H. Christ came down from heaven and was like, I'm going to nut in your mouth. mouth, you fucking faggot, I'd be like, uh, uh, you'd be like, you want to nut my ass too? So what did you feel like when the, have you guys already debriefed the unit? Am I? Is this retreading? The unit, no, no, no, the unit has been debuted. But has that been briefed? Like, when you turned around in the mirror, was it like Merrill Streep? I'm a girl. Like, what was it? No, that's a really

good question. Thank you for asking. Was it baby filter? Was it time traveling to a simpler time? Well, the baby filter makes me look like a Russian twink from the 90s. Oh, which I'm a little, I got to cool it. Sorry, the face app youth filter. Very dangerous game I'm playing with that filter. Very dangerous game. Very slippery slope. Because that is what it's going to take me right to Dr. Zismore. And that's going to turn me into a Palm Springs freak show.

Because I'm going to be like, make me look like I'm 16. I'm going to look like a 60-year-old stretched Palm Springs weirdo. Do you know what I mean? I mean, you have fake lips and a wig on. But my lips don't really look fake. In Nebraska, they do. Not here. Really? I mean, they look fake? Like, that's, I'm not the one to ask. I don't think they look like, they don't look like duck lips. Like, no. No. No. I mean, these lips look huge. And they look like a duck's like. Don't ducks have some kind of corkscrew dick or don't they have a beak in their pussy or something? They got a beak in their pussy and a corkscrew up to ask. No, pigs have corkscrewed dicks. Which, see you at the bullet. Honey. And then also, also, don't squids have beaks up inside them?

No, squids have beaks, but that's just, that's just how they eat. Ducks have corkscrew. I don't have a corkscrew dick, so when I'm topping, I got to spin like a pinwheel. What about, you pig? What about, what about Walrus, the movie? You seen her? Isn't it called Tusk? Sorry, that's absolutely.

Honey, I, I, I was like, I watched that like. Shout out to Justin Long, because she's always giving. Justin Long knows how to pick material. I was like, when is he going to stop hollering and just. talk mama that movie turned I'm not good with body horror that movie is pretty sick

it's fucking crazy it's spoiler alert he goes and get this dude podcaster hello watch out travels to somewhere in Michael Park from succession fucking turns him into a walrus yeah he

he was in Justin Long obviously he's in Jeepers Crupers Barbarian he's in Tusk Barbarian he's in I just saw him in weapons. Let's talk about. He's so good in everything and I always have thought he was so fucking hot. What up, faggot?

I love him. My favorite part of Barbarian. Oh, yeah, what up, faggit. I like when he's clicking, he's on that computer and he goes, he goes, heck yeah, bitch, or something like that. Love that shit. He's such a good douche in that movie. So good.

And he's just, I always thought he was so hot. He's really beautiful in jeepers creepers. I think he likes the gays. I think he doesn't hate them. But that's hard to come by now. I don't want to get political, but just for one second. A loved one told me yesterday that I don't need to worry about gay marriage going to the Supreme Court and that I watch too much shock media.

I said, oh, CNN, shock media. Democracy now with every morning with my fruit loops and fucking frustrated. I get a Gaza death toll. Right. It's like I'm not, and I'm not deep diving deep lib like Reddit 4chan material. I'm just turning on local LA news. Yeah. I'm not watching shock media.

Nothing shocking about LA News is the hard nipples. Super hard. Who at heart nipples? Yeah. This one woman, she says... You could cut glass with those nipples. Of course. And they do.

This one woman says, the way she says downtown L.A., I'm very addicted to. She says, downtown L.A. I will detail your car with my nipples. On the news. On the news. On the news. Wait, I made my friend Joseph watch ghost. He had never seen it.

How would you think of it? Mama, we had a time. It's a great movie. I cry every time. Oh, I was trying. I had a pillow held up, like, to separate us because it was Niagara Falls, Frank Angel, the whole time. The end when she says by to him for the last time, it's too much. When she's at the top of the stairs with the, with the penny in the jar and she, I lose it.

And then, of course, the whole bank scene. The whole bank scene is fucking funny. It is so funny. I also like when she's doing her readings and the room is like a waiting room. Orlando, Orlando. Orlando is that he's here I love that Anyway, pissed off at being a medium

So funny Shout out to Whoopi She really gives it And she won the fucking best Best Supporting Actress Oscar I believe And so well deserved She deserves it

Also the other day When I was in Peetown I watched I just turned on Toobie And you know Tube has all the hits Toobie is like The free streaming platform

That has like Is she related to Is that the ones where people like No no no Oh. What are you saying? Well, I'll talk about it later.

Toby Wilson? Is Mooby related to Toby? Tube is like, okay, remember that movie you saw in the 90s on cable that you forgot existed? Tubey has it. Like, Hand the Rocks the Cradle. Yes. Okay. Drop dead Fred.

Oh, wow. We have long kiss good night. Oh, weird. With commercials. But it's free. But I don't care. I don't fuck with that. And sometimes Tube has series, too, that you might not find any worse.

Weird series. Old shit. Well, what about more? movie? Well, I don't have movie. Is she related to Tooby? What about Ms. Doobie? What about the porn streaming platform? Mooby Dick?

So I was on Tooby and I watched Girl Interrupted and a whoopee's in that too and she eats. She eats. I didn't know that she was in that. She plays a nurse, Miss Valerie. That movie is so beautiful. I remember reading that book and being almost underwhelmed because the movie really hits. Yeah. Noney. The part with Britney Murphy

What is it? Unalive? Kills herself. I'm used to saying raped and killed. So, no, we say Unalived and raped is like No, grape. Grape. There was grape. But if I was raped,

I was raped. Graped. I was raped. You've got to say graped. Oh. It's, you got to use the grape emoji way in print. Oh, because it gets blocked. Oh, graped. Oh. Oh. I just want to talk about

what I did yesterday, which is I wanted to see Freakier Friday. I went to the TCL movie theater and saw weapons. Okay. Because I wanted to talk to you about it today. I'm so glad you did. The IMAX

TCL movie Chinese theater one ticket. $45,000. $27. $27. The heart of Hollywood. It's a little ridiculous to be stepping over urine for a $27 movie ticket. Okay. Okay. Here's the thing. The Marlborough

1-2-3 cinema, I'm talking, we're taking it back to 1991. $3. That's what I'm saying. In high school, I mean, I don't want to be old. In high school, I think we would go see matinees for $6. $3. I saw a Wainsborough seven times. I just think 27 was a little steep.

But here's what you're... But I don't, because with those two, you break it down in hours. So that's what? 1350 or whatever, an hour? For that unforgettable experience with Miss Amy Madigan Giving you everything you ever needed in your life She really Uncle Buck all the way She's an Uncle Buck

Wait what She's oh Amy Madigan The woman who plays Gladys Yeah she's Iris and Carnival incredible She's John Candy's love interest in Uncle Buck Good for her Miss Amy Madigan My two favorite movies I love Uncle Buck

Amy Madigan you need to know what kind of bitch you are That bitch is so horny She's so good what the movie was going to be about other than the trailer. It was a huge surprise for me. Oh, yeah. And I didn't know what was going to be all the trailers. I thought it was going to be alien vibes.

I thought it was going to be abduction. I had no idea. Brainwashing. I don't know. I thought it was going to be three different movies like Barbarian. When the witchcraft started, I was like, oh my God. I didn't know this is going to happen. I was so happy.

I was like, this is just a witch movie. Oh, well, also. Spoilers, by the way. I did get very high, too. And the part where the principal of the school comes running at her at the gas. I was Right after he had bludgeoned his lover To death with his face

Right Which by the way That's a good fuck You know what I mean Like all these fags Like spit in my mouth I'm like cave my skull in Yeah came my skull in with some black liquid

Black diarrhea I love the little thing It was like you know I could make your parents hurt each other I could even make them eat each other You don't want that Alex do you Amy Madigan, where's the Oscar? Also, Whitmer.

Who? The dad is played by Whitmer. Oh, Josh Brolin? No. Oh. The kid's dad. Oh, I don't know who that is. Whitmer Thomas.

I did that show gay. I did that show gay for, not gay for play. What was the show that Matt Rogers used to host on? Oh, the game show. Oh, the game show. Whitmer Thomas and I were partners on that. Oh, really? So I was watching it.

Was he doing the fork thing there, too? No, but they partner a straight person, the gay person. He was my gay person. And I was watching the movie, and I go, oh, yeah, I'm gay. She's back from vacation. She's straight, yeah. You have a wig on and suddenly I'm straight. But I was like, and I was high, and I guess I felt like I was like,

I know. We worked together. We did. We did something. It's fun to see someone you really know in the wild in a movie and not know about it. Yeah. It's very. Like when I found out, um, it's never happened to me, but, right.

I'm sure it will. I'm sure nobody will very, you know, it's successful. Yeah. No, weapons really ate. The actress who also was an, I watched Wolfman on a plane recently. Oh, Julie. I heard that was a major flop. It, it was.

It was okay. Julia Garner. Give it to her. Julia Garner, but she really was amazing in weapons. But who stole the show, Miss Tweaky.com. That tweaker. That tweaker. So what he is, what.

Craig, what's his name, the director, I forget his name. What he's so good at is, like, comedy and horror seamlessly blending. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, it was, I love him, I love him, I love Barbarian, I love this. I read some bullshit review about this. It was like so stupid. The tweaker, I mean, a lot of people didn't like the chapter from each perspective.

They thought it was redundant, it kind of slow. I loved it. Right. I loved the tweaker. He was so funny. He was so funny, and I loved the tweaker element of, or I loved the storytelling element of every time we see somebody else's point of view, we learn something new about what we saw before.

Yeah. It all stacked. It really felt like a mystery. Yeah, totally. I mean, because it was a very mysterious setup. And I also didn't mind that it was a very simple solution. I know you hate this, didn't love this movie. It reminded me of long legs a little bit.

The, because, I mean, Nicholas Cage and Longlegs reminded me a little bit of Gladys. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Comes in kind of mysterious, I don't know what it is. And also, in Long Legs, we couldn't tell if it was, is it murder? Is it paranormal? Right. What is it? I really in Weapons didn't know what was happening with these kids.

But I do know that I will be running the way those kids ran for the rest of my life. Baby. Black mouth? Black mouth. Eyes blaring. Eyes bugged out. My number one, one of my number one celebrity crushes is in this movie. Josh Berlin?

No, Alden Eynrich, who plays the cop. Oh, he was fabulous. Oh, yeah. I would absolutely, I would yank him right off. I would suck the dick, like, clean off his body. I saw him in this awful movie called the godfather. Heavenly creatures, something. I saw him in this awful, like, teen movie, like, 10 years ago.

And I remember being like, who is that? He is so hot. When he showed up in this movie with that mustache, I said, holy shit. You got a dick, sir? You need that sucked He's just he's gorgeous He's so hot Would you suck his cock

The whole body The whole body Yeah it's great I loved the movie so much It was really good $27 a lot I've been doing a An inventory personally

On a lot of horror movies So I just rewatched a bunch of movies Do you not want cinema to flourish In these trying times In these streaming wars In the age of streaming wars Do you not want to go to the cinema It was an empty theater

I mean, the one I went to. It was maybe less than 20 people. Oh, Mars was packed. I don't like to go to Pact because I'm going to tell you something. This was fabulous to see in a Pact Theater. I'm sorry. When something scary happens and everyone laughs, I get pissed off. Well, what about when a jump scare happens and I fly six feet into the air?

That's my. Arms akimbo, legs spread. What's the scary happens? And then the friend in the friend group who got scared cheats out and everyone laughs. I'm like, shut Becky, shut up. We're being scared right now. You need to go to the Alamo draft house. Well, I live down the street from the Chinese theaters

So I was just walked there Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I love the Chinese theater I saw Dune there, she got me right together And walking from my house to the Chinese theater At 10 at night was kind of its own kind of horror movie Ah, who you tell him? Girl. Do you realize the root that I have to get there?

I got to bring blades and a Glock. It's, and then I was high as hell to after the movie Trying to walk home, scared for my life. No, I'm telling you. If anyone was on my side of the street, I was like, The root is, I swear to God, it's like, And I'm like like tea I'm more dangerous than any of these people

No you are and I wasn't even alone So I don't know what I'm scared of Like In my mind I'm a 70 pound Big titted blonde dripping in designer clothing Looking lost And also just dripping wet Right and limping

You know like like a final girl With a breast out Yes with a breast out With a sign on my back that says like come Yeah like I just came from a gang bang But I'm not satisfied Right The gaping hole is just leaking the cement

And I could be tracked very easily. So I've been rewatching a lot of horror movies. I just rewatched Texas Chainsaw Masker. Okay. Hadn't seen it in a while. Very scary for a movie that happens in the daylight the whole time pretty much. You know? Yeah.

Yeah. What daylight movie, scarries? Candyman also? Candyman, hereditary. But no, that's nighttime. So much. It's the round the clock's daytime in that movie. I know.

Oh, sorry. I was thinking of. Midsummer. Midsummer. Midsummer. That's all daytime, scary. Baby, do you see Bow's a first? No

Same director Of hereditary Midsummer Hemeroidatory Sorry I literally Failment And you're just limping around

With a bloody ass Funny you should mention that Shout out to the gay men Who want a top And then you go Oh I'm not prepared And they go I don't care

Shout out to the shit eaters I just Shout out to the good old shit eaters conversation with a gay guy who is a similar, let's say he's in L.A. 4 like me, we were like, you ever fuck a 10? He's like, no. I was like, why not? It's like, because they want me to shit in their mouth. Thank you. End of story. Period. That's a wrap. Thank you. If you have a, if you meet a 10 in LA, you better have that fucking laxative on lock. Because they want to, they want you to do nothing except blow ass into their mouth.

Yeah, I'm not doing that. But also, I've seen some of the comments that at times people believe that I'm a kinkshamer. Well, this is not... But I don't feel that saying that that doesn't resonate with me is kinkshaming. No, I don't think it's kinkshaming. I just think it's disgusting. And also, I think something like my nipples are wired sounds funny. I'm not kingshaming.

That just sounds funny. Maybe I've been pissed on in the shower. Love that. But I will not have blowing acid to my mouth because that will give me... Gartia. Echiority. Echolide.

Sepsis, all the crap, whatever. A bonner. Yeah, yeah. Penetrated. Too long of an orgasm. Right. An erection lasting four hours longer. Pre-opsy. Yeah.

It's crazy. What else did I watch? Oh, I just re-watch the Shining. I just watch it like twice a year. I can't help it. It just eats. Yeah. It eats.

So does Dr. Sleep. I'm going. really surprised. I watched that a couple of times, too. Dr. Sleep is amazing. Rector Ferguson and her jugs. They ever in like a denim shirt. It's just... Baby. To make a woman, to make a villain so

terrifying and dress her in leggings and like a top hat and feathers. And then a flannel and then feather and beaded hair pieces. I was like, that's a vendor at Burning Man. For sure. That's not a soul-sucking villain. She is terrifying. And she is... She's selling forever bracelet.

at Coachella, those things that they link on you? Who wants that? She's got a glowsticks in her trunk. Who wants the bracelet you can't take off? Or they fuse the link on it. Like, but you know what? Straight people don't have cock cages. It's like that's what they're doing.

Do you know what I mean? I try to watch a porno with a cock cage and I said, no. I need to be free. The dick doesn't look good in the cock cage. It just feels like entrapment. Yeah, I'm going to go ahead. I'm going to put this lacrosse thing over my dick and we're going to call it what sexy?

It looked kind of like saw. Like in any end of the moment it was going to go Bairchap. Yes. Wait, do you watch together? Not yet. I liked it.

You did good. I love Dave Franco, obviously. And I love Alison Brie. This is maybe controversial. But Allison Brie, so talented. Dave Franco, so hot. I do, my criticism is that I don't think Dave Franco's acting is quite

at the level of Allison Brie, who I believe is a fintech. So it was a little imbalance, but the body horror was Kunti. The Foley work was amazing, like the squelching, the sound effects. Because Mama, when they get together, they get you together. I heard it's about codependency, and I'm afraid that's going to hit me where I live. It's a pretty heavy-handed metaphor. Don't worry about it. It's like... What did you think? What did you think? I thought weapons was about two things. It was a witch story. don't you think there's a few too many addicts in it for it to not be about that a little bit I don't think it's an alcoholic there's somebody falling off the wagon there's like multiple stages of addiction in this I know

totally I don't really think it was about it I don't I don't think it like really needs an interpretation I thought it was also maybe about school shooting well I know also with the red herring of the AK 47 yeah yeah I mean it brings up a lot of stuff but I don't think I don't know I didn't even really want to interpret it I was just like that that witch is Cunty. I thought it was about how the two-party system doesn't work. And if you didn't get that, you're not paying attention. I'm not here to educate you. It was clearly about reaching across the aisle and then breaking a stick and then having kids. Girl, if I could break a stick, if I could just snatch off a little piece of your wig.

Girl, when that scene where Julia Garner's outside in her car falls asleep and Miss Thing with the scissors. Cunty. I was like my blood pressure, my blood pressure. And then just, you think she's going to slit her throat, she just snap. Oh, God, you got to go to see weapons. I saw it. I went for you. I'm talking to them.

People on the 405, the 101, the 110. Okay. And then I also watched for you. I watched a bunch of stuff in preparation for this because I knew even after a month we'd have nothing to talk about. Titanic. Nope. Nope. I watched Bring her back.

Oh! Bring her back. You want to talk acting? Sally. Sally. She brings it. She brings it to every ball. She brought it to us in shape of water.

so I knew she would bring it to us. She's an incredibly talented actor. She tore that, bring her back shit up. She was not in a horror movie. She was in a drama, and that's what made it so fucking good. Those Philipu, I don't know how to pronounce their names,

the Australian guys. The knife chewing? Swayty. There are very few moments in movies where I have to look away. And this was not torture porn like Saw. I love that shit. And it doesn't bother me because it's still fake.

I was fine way. I mean, there was moments of my life where chewing on a knife could have improved my dental health. So I was kind of on board. That's how I feel at the dental hygienist. Literally. Nobody in America has dental plan.

That's what people are going to be doing. Spoiler alert, there's a point where the young boy who is not, something ain't right with Kevin. Oh, God. There's a knife in the mouth that is, it's so hard to watch. It's so fucking. It is. It's so. Ah.

And also the main actor who's a teenage boy looks like a real teenager. which never happens in movies. If Netflix had produced it, that would have been Josh Broland. Well, it would be like Benny drama in his show where he's going to, it's a college freshman at 33.

Girl. I love that shit. It's real Beverly Hills, no, two, no throwback. But no, the child actors, there was some criticism that I read about the sort of like veracity

of that situation with child services and stuff, but I don't really care. Like, I don't need to believe that this is a plausible scenario. It just seemed to me, that it could be. Do you know what I mean?

Like, this would never have happened logistically with, like, I don't know. Why, they would make a house call, don't you think? Well, but I don't think this woman, I forget exactly what the argument was, but it did seem pretty compelling. Like, this woman was not vetted. I don't know, like, she was clearly had,

she would not have gotten custody so quick at these people. Sure. what's also a different country They might have different rules Is it in Australia? Is it? Maybe. I don't know

But you know Who cares? Also the actress Who plays the blind character She might be blind in real life I'm not sure She was fabulous She reminded me of

I think hush When one of the main characters Is Yes It adds a lot of Fear and vulnerability As the viewer If you're in a predator

pray situation and you're the one who can't see it's very heightened we're gonna go try to in the pool of honey love it I went to tea dance when I was in Ptown it was new wave night love that never dance harder in my life I love the idea of a tea dance in the afternoon four to seven go and have a drink and then it was new wave so it was like blondeie b52s that's shit and I was losing it me and 50 year olds nobody dances like 50 year olds the 30 year old gays who are trying to like look hot or whatever in their horrible themed outfits are over on the deck staring. They're in group staring. Yeah. And the old gays,

the married gays, the ran through gays and the fag tags are on the dance floor. The diaper dance. You know, dancing. New Wave Night was really, really fun. And then I also, I wanted to say I had a rental for a big part of my trip. My time off, I rented a Ford F150 pickup truck. Toxic. I became toxic. How many gays did you kill? How many people? How many people? How many, how many, I was, did you run over? I was like, Ma. Did you run over Missy Bile? Something about a big truck like that.

My first truck was an F-150 when I was in high school. So I took me back to... You drove an F-150 in high school? Manual. Oh, yeah. Transmission, honey. Oh, manual transmission. Who are you?

I'm country. Who are you? I'm country. Who are you? I swear to God. It changes my personality. Can we please make a YouTube video where you teach me how to... to do the manual transmission. I'm dying to know.

So, me driving around in this pickup truck, listening to like friends in low places, I mean, the way I wanted to get truck nuts and a bumper sticker that said my pronouns are USA, like, I was like, you got mud flaps with the girls? But flaps? Mud flaps with the girls on, I mean, or though?

Oh, no, I didn't have. It was a rental. I wasn't pimping my ride, my rental. Well, the next time you should, and let me make a little suggestion to that silhouette, you add a for the... A pussy. The dolls. Add a pussy on the mudflash? No, a dick.

For the dolls. Of course. Put the truck nuts on the mudflop so that it kind of hangs. Love that shit. And also, there was a lot of, not enough young people in Peatown because it's so expensive. Yeah. But I, it's all those, a lot of those straight people were groups of young straight. I mean, they're not, again, they're not faggags.

These are like, these are like just norm core straight people. And norm core Gen Z straight people dress like 90s. Young, normal, straight people? Groups would be like young girls and their girlfriends. Like 20s. God, who can afford it? Doing the thing with like the scarf tied in the ponytail and like the fancy pearls. Doing like the East Coast rich lady cosplay.

No, not like the New England like blue blood. I am fascinated with the Gen Z fixation on dressing like a 90s Republican. Or dressing like they got dressed in the dark? Yes. I keep watching these TikToks that are like, I actually look up to millennials because they're. so free. They just aren't as afraid of like being cringe or whatever. They're not really concerned with looks maxing. But also I wasn't, I wasn't 20 trying to dress like a racist grandmother. So like

it's weird to want that. I just think it's weird to want that. Get my starched shirt and my coolots. By the way, I'm 21. Yeah. Where are my linen palazzo pants? And I know that my generation of Women were wearing, like, suit jackets and pumps to the club, and that didn't make sense either, like, statement necklaces. Like, millennial girls also dressed crazy. But also, you're... But it was the Freakumdress era. Yeah. It was the, you know...

But also, I think, but there is an important detail that even within any generation, there are subcultures in, like, groups of people, like, there's goths in every generation. Right. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah, of course. Like, and so, like, I guess you're probably, you must be referring to, like, the sort of just main... stream? It's like the boyfriend has the

the mustache and the hair that communicates racism. Oh, okay, okay, okay, okay. It's like Morgan Wallen? Yes, with the mullet. And then the girlfriend is, is dressing like a 70-year-old Cape Cod heiress. God. And everyone looks like they are saving themselves for marriage. Don't you want to just kick him off the

dog? Yes. Yeah. Yes. You are not Carolyn Kennedy or whatever the fuck. I guess mean for straight people in gay world it's like when when we get your money we don't say anything right so i know we can't play both sides of the fence where it's like well if you're coming here with your Caucasian heterosexual money and you're using it to give to businesses i know that's not evil right you buy the ice cream you know buy things from the art gallery do it sis do it lady but like do it you white bitch yeah but at the same time it i just wonder like what do you get out of Because, like, I'm going to show girls to see Ryan Landry wiggle around with his dick out.

Right. And you're coming here for what exactly? Freak show. Freak show. They're like, let's go see something kind of crazy. Let's see Kristen Chenow at that town hall. You know what I mean? And, like, let's, let's, let's, like, don't you think there's an exotic freak show element?

But that is there, Dina Martina, I think. No. But there's an exotic freak show element to it, I'm assuming. Maybe. Like, don't you want to like, hey, babe, we're going to go down to the cave and see some fucking three-inch nipples and a guy with a, with, on the chain. You know what I mean? People at the rental

blown out their blowing out the electricity putting the dice in in on the nipples making sure that they're good in air fryer up the ass. That's not a cock cage. That's a ninja air fryer.

It's nuts. I had some wonderful meals though. I really love P-Town and I like seafood though. No, not at all. Not at all. And I was with a group

who did so I mean all my years I lived there I never went to lobster pot. There's a lot of places I just never went to. And I was like, to see people get served the oysters, you're going to go ahead and sip that snot out of that shell, honey? I had one oyster one time.

I had to try it. Lobster, rats of the sea, as you know. The fishy smell of the sea and the cape is something that is not attractive to me. I hate seafood. I hate it so much. I think it's all disgusting. Yeah. But that's what really prevented me from enjoyment.

enjoying the most beautiful destination I've ever been to the Amalfi Coast like postcard everywhere you look like incredible incredible but every fucking dish at a restaurant is like mussels clams lobster fish I only went once and I I was in I was in the Amalfi Coast for 18 hours

Are you serious? Yeah I went in I DJed I think Berdolci and Gabana I believe right that's right it was so beautiful though right It was beautiful and they sent me up nice I had this big DJ deck on like the edge of of a cliff. It was too nice. It was too nice. It's incredible. But I wish I would have made able to stay for vacation. It was one of the beautiful place I've ever seen.

That's what I hear. That's what I hear. Crazy. Anyways, what else? I wanted to tell you something else. Tell me something, girl. I had sex? Huge of true. Yeah. Huge of true. Yeah. I did. And it was nice. With who? It might have been an escort

In fact it was Can I talk to you about the standards and practices of this I have reached a point with this pod where I'm never sure What story to tell? Because we've been in situations where we don't share someone's name or anything And they still get mad that we mention something Yeah So I'm always not sure about what we're allowed to talk about

Or the opposite. Day Mori, the magician, that's his name Oh, you didn't say his name No, he wants me to Oh, gotcha boo. J. Mori, D-A-Y, M-O-R-I, the Magic Castle, magician. Check him out. But I will not, I don't even remember the escorts name, but it was the rose and the thorn of the sex.

The rosebud. You saw the... No, no, no, no. Well, you know, it was interesting. He had a super hairy ass, which is not my gig. But because he was so, so hygienically on point, I didn't, it was lovely. Because I like my favorite thing to do other than watch movies is to eat ass. Right.

Let's take a break. I had a DJ gig in P-Town and there was these two lesbians standing directly in the front the whole time. And they were watching me. No, no. But sometimes you can feel the female gays, the sexuality. Oh okay. You know, some of these young women want to fuck us, which as lesbians makes perfect sense, right? Gay men. No, it does. But I wasn't even in drag. Oh, you? No, I had a pajama pants tied on my head, like a headscarf. I looked like Alicia Keys. Um, I looked so good. Uh, and these two girls in the front were, we're, we're vibing and bopping and I waved and they waved back. And then I went like this. Like, are you guys together? And they said, yeah, and they hugged. And then I played some more. And then I, just like as a joke was like, and they laughed. And they laughed and they laughed and it was all. It was funny. And then one of them turned with the laughing.

It was like, ha ha ha. Like, she was ready. Damn. Would you do it? Why didn't you do it? I could have any woman in that room that night,

provided she was a lesbian who was already with someone. With gluckal. That is who wants me. Oh, my God. And I do that to a gay man and like, they start puking. The black. They start puking.

My God. I'm having a great lovely week back in Los Angeles. Kicked out the house sitter. Kicked out the house sitter. Yep, she had some food in the freezer. A ate that. I said, I don't think I remember buying cheese curds, but I have an air friar. Mom, I love that air fire.

Miss Ninja gets it going. Oh, I have the Paris Hilton one. It was a pink. And I just received a birthday present. I got a pink toaster too. Oh, I have, I have. I've wanted this pink smeged toaster for so long, but I've been too cheap to buy it, and I got it for my birthday. $27.

The theater, how could you possibly? I know. God damn, weapons got me in the poor house. Okay? I have to give you a warning and an apology in advance. I'm not going to get your birthday present this year. That's fine. I'm totally fine with that.

I'm reaching an age where I actually want nothing. Great. Really? I will want, like, my food I want. You know, I have a, this year I got a random TV gig on my birthday, which I'm fine with. very small that's major so I'm really excited

I know well I bought for my birthday I oh my god that's so I know I'm freaking a few blocks from where I grew up I rented a cabin to go stay in for my birthday I was going to go to the

to the Marinette County Fair and then I got this gig so I'm going a day late so I called my brother and was like you can stay in the house for a day by yourself but I'm taking a red eye to Green Bay Wisconsin and then renting a car

Because I wanted to do the gig I was like I don't care what it is I don't care what it I think it's even non-speaking I was like I don't care who cares They just show your foot I get nervous doing acting So I was like non-speaking Love it

Yeah especially on a show Like when our managers Like floated the possibility of us Being on hacks I was like I don't want to ruin that show Yeah you know I mean Robbie Hoffman

My boyfriend Just got an Emmy nomination On hacks Your boyfriend? The lesbian on hacks with the slick down hair with the glasses. She's very Jewish. Ooh. The one who's like, I'm not a lesbian, or I'm not gay, I'm a lesbian.

Oh, oh, oh, yes, yes, yes. She's very funny. I did a stand-up gig with her once and I immediately fell in love. She's very funny. Great to see people rise at the top. Not us, though. No. Still middling.

Yeah, I'm comfortable coasting my way to the middle. Do you ever hear, I'm going to the get it. I went to my annual checkup today. I go to my annual checkup at one medical. They scrape the barnacles off your feet. I don't know what I'm there for. It feels dumb to go to the doctor when you're not sick, but I also feel like in America,

if you have access to a checkup, you should go. I know, and I think I'm way overdue for my prostate exam. You're supposed to start at 45 unless you have a history of it in your family. Oh, I thought it was 40. Girl, I started at 25. I was like, are you sure? Yeah, I think maybe another opinion. I got one a year from like 25 to 30

and they were like, why are you here? You're too young. And I was like, I'm being proactive. I never thought I'd be in a situation where I could afford care. Sorry for all the jizz on the table. Did you imagine? Oh, I bend over and just push a load out.

Oh, gross. At the proctologist. And by the way, there's people in my proctologist's office who have said that they're fans too and they said it after the exam and I'm like, great. I don't believe you that there's such thing

as a proctologist. A butt doctor? I believe there are doctors who specialize in that area, but they're not called proctologists. Girl, and I was having all these rashes from doing drag, from all the shaving and stuff, and a few weeks off drag, your skin gets really good. When you're not in makeup, your skin gets great. And I went to the dermatologist the other day, my dermatologist, Dr. Pro Grimes, and she said, let me see. And she took me in the light.

And she goes, you look damn good. And I was like, thank you. She said, if you don't mind me saying so, I was like, sure say what to say anything i'm doing one of those patch tests where they you need like three or five days to do it where they i think they do a bunch of pinpricks from all different ingredients allergies yes oh i love that and then you have to keep the plastic on it for a few days and not shower and then you come in and they see what's reacted i want to do that i don't want to do it but they're doing a cosmetic one because i don't know when i'm in drag all the time i start to get face rashes i'm

trying to figure out what it's from i mean they're so i mean gosh i'm like it could be the shaving cream it could be the the chemicals in the abraded skin yeah she thinks that for drag like she's like you might not be allergic to a chemical your skin just might not like being fucked with that much anymore that part

which is yeah drag sucks for the face well on the fourth day in a row for me when I'm trying to pack like mud onto blood yeah it's just a little challenge what about Monday I texted Katia Sunday because I thought we had Netflix the next

day and I texted, girl, I'm emotionally preparing myself for Netflix tomorrow. And then I had a heart attack. And then I checked my calendar and I was like, you bitch. Why did you think that? I don't know. I love doing it, but there were long days and I do have to the day before, like enter a stasis of Zen and be like, tomorrow you will be up at 7 a.m. Yeah, yeah. The emotional preparation is like, is like non-negotiable. Plus, if I had to, if I learned that like at 7 p.m. the night before that I was going to do two days of Netflix, I'd be like, Can I give you a problem with weapons? Sure.

I didn't make it. We're cutting off people's hair. But then we get the witch by cutting off a piece of her wig. It's an item. It's an item. Remember because they got all the stickers from... They cut the red hair off and I was like, so what? They're going to go kill Kathy Griffin.

I was like... No, her wig. Right. But I thought the other people were cutting off their real hair. Some of them. did cut off some people's hair, but then she... The principal was a ribbon, I guess. The, yes, the ribbon and it was just a, it's just a personal item.

A personal. Hair's pretty personal. The wig is, I mean, she's got, I was texting with my friend, she was like, when she goes to the salon to get that one hair done underneath, that one good hair. Of the braids. Yeah. So fierce. Love.

Why is, I, I do think there's like, maybe a little bit of an overcooked trend with the baby bangs. The baby bangs as a signifier of evil, baby bangs as the signifier of robot, the baby bangs as a signifier of other. Just because you got baby bangs doesn't mean you're crazy. It does mean you're non-binary. Baby bangs is not a great drag name, or not a horrible drag name. It's true. What about this drag king name I thought of? Colin Sick?

That's perfect. Love that, right? That's perfect. Colin? Colin sick. That's perfect. Call me now for your free reading. Let's wrap in chat.

Oh, okay. Sorry. I do want to, you guys, go see weapons, go see together. You can catch on streaming. It's time of that great, but it's good. And then, um, uh... Look at my hat, what I got sent in the mail. Oh, they toned off.

The lights turned off kids sent me this hat. I get mail from children. Bye. Bye. Thank you.