The Basement Yard - #165 - Getting High On Tampons

Episode Date: November 26, 2018

Apparently kids are now getting high off tampon juice... yeah, I know. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I Should I leave that in hell, yeah, I Was just like but you looked like a like a kid That was like stage fright like seventh grade in the recital about to sing his first song Yeah, and nothing came out. Yeah, I don't know what that was but anyway welcome back to the basement yard I have already fucked this up. It's all right. This is the first time that I'm drinking on an episode in a very long time, but Needed one today, buddy. I hear you one today. I hear you also I just want to give a quick shout out to our patrons and our patreon if you want to support the show just like they are

You can head to patreon.com slash the basement yard P a t r e o n dot com slash the basement yard and Depending on how much money you're pledging. There are some cool rewards there you get episodes in advance and shit like that But anyway, check out the new merch. I'm wearing All right, these are the crew next sweaters that sold out in the first day, but we restocked them Actually when this episode goes out, it'll be the last day. You can even buy them So if you're not getting them today, you're not gonna get them unless I bring them back at some point Which I don't know if I am but yeah, whatever. Yeah, kind of looks like you went to college now. Yeah, I didn't yeah, but uh, You know, it's alright. It's nothing wrong with that. I think it's a good look. I did a fire ass sweatshirt

No, yeah, I really I honestly I swear to God. I really like it like it's a really good quality shirt and like this is raised and fuzzy Yeah, you know I'm saying I beg Joe to let me wear mine too on the show, but he didn't let me What are you trying to do not what you're trying to divide us and now we are one we're supposed to be a team We are one we are team you're turning me against you. No, you'd never yes You're doing I never felt that way before in my life ever in the history of my life I'm sick of this kid But yeah, one thing that I did want to talk about in the beginning of this episode because I was you're staring at Beer down. What are you talking about? You're staring at that. You're making me sound like an addict

No, you look like you stare at that beer like you're like a coal miner that just got off like an 18-hour shift Yes, I need a cold one. I just need a cold one Did you drink yesterday? At all Well, no What about day before that? Sunday, yeah, of course, right? I don't think so. What's going on here? What you know, it's weird that I'm not

No, you know why because I don't know It was last week one day to Thursday. I drank every single day, but not like but not like drink No, no, but like you had things to do like on one day on Tuesday Greg comes over to do other people's lives shout out to that podcast that I do also go check that out Nobody came over to do that and Sometimes when he's had like a long work day, he's like I just wouldn't have like a little whiskey So I was like, alright, I'll have a beer. So like that was like my drink for that day Yeah, you know, but every day I had at least one beer. That's not terrible. No, I mean, you know

could be worse Well tomorrow, well No Thanksgiving Eve is the biggest drinking night of the year. Yeah, that's will you be drinking on that night? Yeah, we're gonna do like a bar crawl. Oh, so you're gonna get sauce. No, I mean Yeah, probably Yeah, why not? I rarely get like drunk because my tolerance is pretty good And I don't really like I usually drink beers and it's hard for me to get like drunk off of beers

I'm drinking these yeah, which I'm not guys I saw Joe take a shot of vodka this weekend not and it looked and it looked like it was like a double shot Yeah, yeah, you knowing that a shot is so like you have to look at it. Yeah, like and size it up. You literally say you're like Whatever you pour shots you can tell like who's down to drink and who's not by someone goes I don't know. This is kind of big. Yeah. Is this a double when someone acts? Is this a double shot? If anyone stares at the shot glass before they're they're a little worried about it. Yeah But uh, yeah, I saw take a shot of vodka. It looked like he wanted to kill himself. Vodka is disgusting I think vodka is gross. It's it's great. Vodka straight vodka with anything. I don't care

I don't like mixing it with shit. I'd rather drink whiskey. Have you ever had a martini? Yeah, I like martinis I'm not crazy about not crazy about them. No, no, you know, it's crazy I used to hate tequila and I even like tequila way more than I like vodka Tequila is awesome. Tequila is probably the easiest thing to shoot. Yeah, by the way, you know, I can't take shots What I can't do it like I saw you do. No, I've done it, but I can't do it correctly Oh, you don't take it all the way down. No, no, no, so how do you how do you how do you drink a shot? I just open my throat right and just pour it in there. Yeah. No, I can't do that I'm like you like let it sit in there. Yeah, I'm like a virgin like I can't open my throat

I can't do it. I'm surprised. You don't puke from that. No Yeah, and I don't chase things either. Oh, I don't like chasing. I don't like chasing either. I feel like it ruins it Chase it with a beer. Yeah, I'll do that. I'll do that like like tequila shots and like beers. I Could do that. Yeah, but I uh the glory days I if I'm taking a shot. I have to literally take gulps not not a shot because it's like it's not a lot Yeah, but if it's like but if it's like a double of like Jameson I have to take a goal. Yeah, do you hold your nose? No, you ever see those people I fucking hate that hold their nose and fucking take a shot

If you have to hold your nose while you take a shot or you have to hold your nose when you jump into a pool Yeah, get the fuck out. Yeah, get out of here. You shouldn't be drinking or swimming Like what you shouldn't be drinking or swimming. I think you shouldn't be drinking and swimming I'm not talking about the same time. No, no, no, but they should get the fuck out of here. Yeah, dude. You're an adult Yeah, that's like having training wheels Yeah, or like if they're eating like something they don't like like oh, I'm gonna hold my nose and eat it Yeah, shut the fuck up. Let's sure on fear factor eating like a buffalo's dick. Don't hold your nose. Just eat it I never understood the holding of the nose. It doesn't make sense. I don't think it works either. It doesn't know

I can't how can me not smelling this I could still take I got taste buds Yeah, but like a date like after a hangover though if you smell alcohol. It could make me sick. I Don't really get hung over too much really I've been hung over like maybe three times in my whole life. Were you drunk Saturday? Yeah, so Saturday we were together we were out we were should we talk about what happened on Saturday? Yeah, probably oh my god So I will get into that. Yeah. Yeah, we can't start with that. That was Saturday I was drunk for a certain amount of time, but I wasn't drunk that like would last into my Slumber, yeah, you know what I mean like I was drunk for like two and a half hours. Yeah, and then I was fine Then you just got tired. Yeah, I was exhausted, but

Yeah, oh hold on real quick. So it reminded me because I was drinking. There's this fad going around apparently in Indonesia Where kids are drinking like boiled tampons and Getting drunk that way or something. I have the the article like in my pocket But so they swallow the whole tampon. No, no It's like boiled tampon juice Which is one of the grossest? Assemblance of words. Yeah, I know boil tampon juice. So it's like

Like chicken broth, but it's tampon broth. I Guess I don't know. Hold on. Let me read this. It says It has been revealed that a number of teens in Indonesia have been collecting tampons and already off the bat What are you doing? Yeah, collecting tampons and menstrual pads for the purpose of repurposing them to act as cheap substitutes to alcohol and party drugs Whose idea was this Some of the Femme Femme by the way feminine can't say that feminine feminine some of the feminine Hygiene products used by the aforementioned group have already been warned by menstruating women a factor that evidently does not repel fans of this

Alternative so they don't care if it's bloody bloody or not or whatever or yeah, I guess if you boil it you're cleaning it I just don't understand how This gets you drunk. How does period blood and tampons get you drunk? I like I just don't understand that and also how do you how do you try like who comes up that shit? Yeah, what are these kids fucking chemists out there? Everyone's a chemist. So yeah, we're at a beer be like I do have like six tampons though. You could boil those up She's like, yo, you got any socks and rubber bands. Are there chemicals and tampons? I didn't I Don't know aren't they're not supposed to be with I thought it was like to protect your sense of age

Yeah, you have a sensitive age and you can't get The National Narcotics Agency in Indonesia has announced that the chlorine used to sanitize the menstrual products is what causes the teens to feel tipsy and This is hallucinations hallucinations. They're tripping balls off tampons jumping off tampons tripping tampon trips I didn't know there was chlorine and tampons. I Didn't know there was chemicals in there. I just thought I just thought it was like tightly compact like like Period stopping stuff. I thought it was just Paper paper like super paper a thick-ass bounty in a that shape. God tampons are so whack

Thank God for my penis. It's it's like I I don't think I could do that one. I'm gross. So like I don't think I could Constantly be checking on my on my sniz like that. Do you think you'd use pads or tampons? Oh easily tampons super to why? Because I just know that I would have a heavy flow and like but I think the pad covers all No, no no no no tampons gets in there. You get no leakage the pads can leak I've seen I've seen commercials for the pads. They're like they you stick them on like Fucking glue. It's like glue. There's like it's adhesive. Yeah, but I think you could still piss with a tampon I don't think you could pee with a pad. Wait, can you you could pee with a tampon in? Yeah, of course It's two different holes

Yeah, but I feel like You could pee with a tampon You don't think they like pull it out pee and then put it back in no Or like they're changing that thing all the time. It's like a NASCAR like thing Yeah, I'll every two laps you got to come in and like five people come in and they change it up Yeah, it's yeah, they fucking with the drill gun and Get the fuck out. Yeah, it's exactly right back on the road. Yeah, but uh, no I think there's different types of absorbencies like there's like like light medium and like heavy heavy as shit

Yeah, or super they call it. I think they call it super Super ponds. Yeah, and then they come in like plastic. You've seen them. Yeah, and then They put it in their sniz and then they like there's an applicator and they just push it up Mm-hmm, and then it stays in there. It's kind of like that thing with Batman uses to repel up buildings But yeah, but yeah, it's like it's like the Batclaw. Yeah, but shoots right up there And then they just discard of the plastic. I'll be honest with you I like I've never even thought about if you were able to pee with a tampon in or not. Yeah, I mean I Feel like that would be uncomfortable. How do you not like?

Notice, I mean, I don't know. How do you not notice that there's a thing in you all like it doesn't bother you I'd rather just have a pad like it just feel like I have an icy hot down there without all the warm and like cold sensation Yeah, but then I feel like if you take it off, it's just like a mess. It's like a diaper. Yeah Yeah, I would guarantee you the only reason like now. This is super hot. I could be 100% wrong. Oh man I am excited for this, but I think that if some like there's some girls that don't like tampons because like they have like small vag holes They do and and and a tampon is an option for them. So they use maxi pads So wait you you think that girls with small Vagines. Yeah have to use pads. Yes. I

Think they make smaller sizes of the ponds. Maybe they do. I mean, I'm just speaking out of why I think someone would choose a pad over a Tampon, you know, I just want to let you know something if we are completely wrong on all of this we sound like fucking I know like worse than we usually do. Yeah, yeah, this is this is horrible. It's borderline offensive. Yeah, probably. Yeah Someone's gonna be mad. It's okay. It's all right. Yeah, I'm ready for that. I'm good I'm ready. I just won't read my Twitter for like three days. Yeah, I'll boil a tampon drink it off. I'll be fine Imagine hallucinating off a tampon, dude, I honestly don't know how people figure this shit out There was a kid in my high school one time We were on a free period and I think it was like a sophomore and at that point I wasn't even drinking at all and this kid was like

Talking about this drug that he created or something and not that he created like invented But he was like, you know, whatever and literally I'm not I'm like paraphrasing a little bit But all the things that I'm saying like he actually said he said something about a banana peel Okay, and like, you know how a banana peel has that like that fill me shit fucking The fuck is this it's serious. Sorry is my it was my Apple watch. What are you doing? I don't know, but she didn't understand either what you're saying. Yeah, I'm trying to I know she's understand It's confusing but that shit that's on it's like the jizzy whatever you have to scrape all that off Then you put toothpaste on this banana peel, right? Okay, you leave it like out in the sun

All right, or like you microwave it or something then you leave it out in the sun in sunlight for like two days Okay, and then it like hardens Okay, and then they were like a couple of other steps and then you eat it and then you trip balls. Yeah, and I was like How the fuck do you like I'm like That's a lot of effort for like That's way too much effort to get hot or whatever it makes you dude If I got to go buy bananas and like get some toothpaste and I got to put it out of the windows So like it's a plant. Yeah, I'm good. No, that's not that's not it's no good. I mean

What's the strangest thing I've taken to get high that like wasn't like an actual thing Like a marker just sniffed a shit out of one of those markers. No, I've never I've never huffed Is that clown car out there The fuck is that like a fucking DJ clown This one's doing Morse code out there. I think they're done. Okay. Good. No, but um, maybe you like cough medicine. I Tripped balls off cough medicine. You took mad cough medicine. Oh my god, dude. Why it was cox. I was like 15 stupid Yeah, I think this called Carusadin. It's called. Do you remember that? No, it sounds like someone like an Italian dude's last name though Carusadin I thought I'm a Carusadin in there or it sounds like the name of a hot girl in high school like Kristen Carusadin

Yeah, and she's just like she got overdeveloped boobs. They're like, oh my god, you know Kristen Fucking she's on the volleyball team. Let's go to the game. Her dad's like pretty good looking too. Yeah, her dad's like tan Yeah, and he's got like five o'clock shadow. They have like a condo in Florida Yeah, not a time-share. No, no, it's their outright outright and they literally will take her out of school early on Friday Just to get there like for the weekend, right? Yeah, she drives a Range Rover. Yeah easily. Yeah, but what were we talking about? Oh, I took a cough medicine. Yeah, and dude. I Fucking was tripping balls Why?

Balls, so who was I whose idea was it was like, yo, we're gonna take mad cough medicine Just one of my friends We couldn't find any weed and we could and we were too young. We couldn't find anybody to buy us beer and we were like damn How are we gonna get through this evening? So then we decided to take Carusadin, which is an over-the-counter fucking cough medicine and It's in pill form. So you had to take like nine pills at once. That's a little terrifying. Yeah, it wasn't the smartest thing I've ever done, but you know, I'm truthful on here so like

30 minutes, I'm like not feeling it not feeling it at all our nothing an hour and ten minutes in Everything just starts going Like slow like, you know when you're drunk sometimes you look to the left and you feel like your eyes take a little bit to catch up With your face. Yeah, you know, I I do that on purpose when I'm drunk I'm like, I'll do this and be like, can I see the room still when I do that? It's like your vision is still on its way over. Yeah, my eyes are here, but my face is here Yeah, yeah, so that's what it started to feel like and everything was kind of like Like slow

And I remember being like, yo, this is the highest I've ever been I don't want to be this high anymore This needs to stop right like it got to the point where I got so high or I was like, please stop I don't want to be high anymore But that was probably the craziest thing I've ever done nice and that doesn't even compare to drinking tampon boil juice Drinking tampon boil juice is one of the grossest things I've ever heard in my life and it's that it causes Hallucinations so you fuck, you're not just drinking you're tripping ass. You're tripping off the pond so hard that you're seeing shit Dude, how do wait, I don't so now I don't understand how Because I mean if you're jamming a TP, you would think it would go into their bloodstream

So I'm saying the chlorine is still on it. The hot water has to make it release. Okay. It's probably sealed Yeah, but I mean the body's kind of hot. I don't know anything 98.6. That's the inside. Yeah, that's hot So how does this chlorine not you are like if you have a fever Maybe you melt that thing and you get the fucking hallucinations could be that you can't have your period when you have a fever because If you put a tampon in there, so imagine you had the flu and your period at the same time. I Cannot imagine that would be terrible. Yeah. Yeah

Like listen the human body Amazing amazing if you really really think about where's this going? Do we really need that though? What periods? There was no other way That this could have been figured out Instead of this these poor women have to bleed every month. Yeah, could have figured it out. I Would have gone a different route if you're asking I mean listen, you know pee out the pee hole makes sense Yeah, poop out the butt makes sense. Yeah Blood out the vagina. I think we could have rethought that one

I feel like I would have went a different way with that if you could change the period Nosebleed a little nosebleed or something. Yeah. Oh fuck not too bad Yeah, not too bad or maybe just like you get like, you know like a bruise or something. Yeah a hematoma Yeah, you know, you get a nice little bruise here. Like oh, there you go. Got it. Oh, you gotta like drain it or it's like I just it shows up. You know, it goes away in three days. Yeah, I think that's better This whole blood with the cramps and they're like I'm in pain. It's a week and I hate you now Yeah, bleed for a week. Yeah, a week. Oh a week. Yeah, what the fuck is that? Yeah, and yeah, and the period of time makes it even we only work five days a week. Why is this lasting seven?

I don't understand. We have to lose seven days. You know well Thankfully, I have a penis Yeah, I mean, I'm definitely glad that I have a penis as well Yeah, I can't imagine what life is it life is like with a a burgine a bird This is this is so weird health of people never call anything like by its name. I love doing that You have no idea. It's one of my favorite things to do. I I love just Calling things not what they are. Yeah, my favorite. Yeah, you know

I love abbreviating words that don't need to be abbreviated and just like calling things that they aren't There's a lot of that on this show. Yeah, you know, you know, hold on You know, I I don't know why this is popped in my head. You know what I fucking hate When like grown adults When talking to other grown adults use the word tummy to describe their stomach. Yeah, I almost find it disrespectful Yeah, it's almost in it's it's uh What is it? It's uh, it's fucking stupid. What's it? What's that saying? It's uh disrespecting my intelligence or something basically Yeah, you're like

You're just sitting there. You're like, oh my god and some and I'm like, oh my god. What's wrong? Are you all right? Yes, you know my tummy hurts. Yeah, I do get out of here. Yeah, your tummy hurts You know, so it was no now that you say that, you know, it was weird how How people call like their grandma's different names What do you call your grandparents? Grandma grandma grandpa. Yeah, and you know what I call my other grand I call my Puerto Rican grandma abuelita, but that's like no way. Yeah, it's grandma. It's a Spanish word. Yeah for grandma Yes, you're not calling her Be bop or whatever the fuck people call them. No, no, no, no, no, it's fucking there's all ends. Yeah, all that my nana

My no, no my noni Noni boni. I'm like my noni noni my gamgam. Yeah, first of all, like gamgam might be the worst. Yeah I don't understand. I think I think gamgams Sorry, sorry for all the grandma's listening, but I think I throw the gamgams. Yeah, I think gamgam is The single ugliest name to give your grandma. Here's the thing though. If you want to call your grandma gamgam Gamgam it up. Have your fun. Yeah with her though. Yeah, don't come to me like Yeah, I'm really upset because my gamgams in the hospital. I don't know gamgam. Yeah. Well, I'm like, is that your dog Yeah, who is that? Is that a is that a lizard? Is that your hamster? Who is that? Yeah, who's good? Who is gamgam?

Who's gamgam tell me it's your grandma. Yeah to me You want to call her gamgam? Have fun at christmas call her gamgam all you want Imagine if somebody called out of work. It's like, yeah I'm gonna I can't make it in my my gamgam does You know, it's like like a part of me if I was the boss would be like, did this guy just say he's gamgam? We're gonna have to let this guy go. Yeah, I don't know man. I I just The gamgam the fucking pop-up. Yeah, peep-peep Call grandpa noises. It's all like what do you call your grandpa?

What'd you call your grandpa's? I called my grandpa's grandpa and I called the other one fucking grandpa. Yes Because he is my grandpa. Yes. He is my grandpa. Yes. That's why I called him that I didn't call him. Well, if you think about it grandpa is the grandfather But no one's gonna be like grandfather. Yeah, because we're not fucking this isn't the 19 20s or whatever. We don't end every word with e V V Ye old yield. Yeah, I don't know man. I just feel like there's a lot a lot of things about words bother me A lot of things about words. Let me ask you this. You say caramel

Yeah caramel. I hate when people say caramel Carmel That's not when people say caramel like you want to do a double take you want to look at the fucking word again You want to spell it out? There's another eight. I know Caramel. Oh man. I would love some cookie dough caramel Gross, what are you talking about also makes it sound grosser? Caramel. I don't want to eat caramel caramel. I'm in Caramel's so good caramel so good

I would love to just jump into a tub of caramel, but it would be very sticky. What is caramel? sugar I don't know remember those werther Weathers where there's where there's caramel originals Unbelievable unbelievable caramel might be my favorite. Yeah topping. Yes Cookie dough ice cream. Yes With fucking caramel. Yes Yeah, I'll be so fucking good man. That was sexual. Yeah

Oh Man, I love that fucking cookie dough man. Oh, that ice cream's so good man. Oh, it's it's funny because it's true Oh, fuck. Yeah, you remember that shit you were put on ice cream. Fuck it. It was like it was not it was like chocolate But then it would turn into a shell. Hard shell. Yeah, dude I can't do that thing, but I would if I Yeah, I can't do that. Yeah. No, I think if you try How do you do it if you hold your these two put these two together? Yeah Just make this finger loose like as loose as possible. These are tight. This one's loose

and snap it Oh, let me try one more time. This one has to slap against you. Yeah, so it's Oh My god, go to youtube.com slash baby. You're already seeing Joe trying to do this. Yeah, I can't just one more time. Okay All right now tight tight here. This finger is loose like this. Yeah Oh, you got it I heard it. I heard the whole hand is like, I heard it. I heard it. I mean, I'll take this is a good try I'm sorry. Put some caramel on it. Yeah

Caramel is the best Butterscotch butterscotch is great too. Butterscotch is good. Don't mind don't mind butterscotch. Hey cherry on top disgusting Don't get put a cherry in my ice cream. We will fist fight Yeah, and also it's like for some reason it makes everything else gross Cherries are nasty because this I wouldn't go that far. Oh, I'd go there I'd go there. Can you try? Okay. All right. Can you tie cherry seven in your in your mouth? What are you doing? What are you just going on over there? I burped. Can I try? Try it. What's going on over there?

I don't know. I had this is 8.2. Oh man, you're gonna be fucking telling me these dark secrets. Yeah, I know What are you saying? Can you tie a cherry seven in your mouth? I've done it once before because I was like, oh if you could do it, you're a good kisser But I'm like, you know, that's why I did it. But now looking back on it hindsight. I'm like Yeah, when I make out with someone I'm not trying to tie things again You know, eat your ass maybe. Yeah, like so the other the other thing is like can you open a starburst with your tongue? That's mad easy. I've never done that. I've never heard of that. Can you do tongue tongue stuff like tricks? Yeah, what was that? I don't know

That was nothing. Can you do a wave with your tongue? I used to be able to do this thing. I don't know if I could do it. I would have to look in the mirror But can you fold your tongue? Yeah, that's easy. All right. Yeah, but you ever see somebody do the clove? Yeah, I can do that. No, you can't. That's the thing I was talking about if I do it right now I can't do it without looking at myself in the mirror Like I have to see it Like can you do it with your phone? The thing you're talking about where it's like it comes this way and then down Yeah, it looks like it looks like like the thing in the back of your throat. Yeah, I can do that. I could I can you flip your tongue over?

Yeah, wow fuck What are you doing over there? How do we get here do for the pot? What were you talking about? I don't know. Oh, we were talking about how uh People say caramel. Oh, yeah, you know, it's also really annoying catch up Yeah, I say catch up though. Yeah, that's stupid Catch up. I feel like I'm going out of my way to etch It's like I'm really going out of my way though to be like etch

catch up catch up catch up Catch up some people say cats up That's that's like over the wall stupid. That's that is that is ridiculous. Yeah cats up cats up that Cats that's something that's just something I would expect like my like six-year-old like niece who has a speech impediment I need speech therapy cats up. Yeah, I got one cats up uncle Danny. Yeah, okay. Okay. We're gonna get you a speech therapist English it's all right talking is super cute though. Yeah, I love it and it's also if you really think about it. They're so dumb So it makes it even cuter You know like they just believe in everything. Yeah, and they mispronounce more words. I think I don't know

I think adults mispronounce more words than fucking than kids do Probably yo, I look forward to lying to my kids so much. I know I'm gonna lie to my kids a lot so hard Like I can't believe my parents didn't do that They were also they were always very truthful with me and like they're just idiots Yeah, my parents lied to me you could have had so much fun and just been like yo two plus two doesn't equal four

it equals reindeer Yeah I'd have to believe it. You know what's weird though is that in a way they're not In a way, they're not wrong if they were to say that No, two plus two is definitely not reindeer Danny. No, no, no, but here's what I'm saying not to get too deep Like the whole idea of math is man made You know so if it's if it's two plus two it's because somebody said there's two things here

You know, do you know what I'm trying to say? Yeah, but but it's like, you know what I mean It's just like we all decided that like when do we all decide that this was gonna be two? I don't know. Is that weird No You don't think it's weird. There needed to be a number system Really well Yes to count things. I know that but in terms of like

There's two And everyone just was like, all right, it's gonna be two all around Yeah, in every in every civilization. This is two Like I'm counting my fist here. I don't know why I'm counting my fist. Yeah, I don't know You look like the like the Notre Dame logo. It's ready to do this But like, you know, it's this kind of weird that it's just like, yeah, you accept that All right, before we move forward, let's get to the sponsors here The first one we have is cent bird, which is a luxury fragrance subscription service

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So go check them out And lastly we have a new sponsor today, which is stock x and I am incredibly happy to be working with this company because I Use their service already. Uh, this is where I buy and I know dany uses them like crazy I mean if you see dany's instagram stories, it's kids buying sneakers every other day But stock x basically i'm not even gonna read what they had because I already know about their company It's an app where you can uh, you know buy and sell, uh, the newest sneakers So if a sneakers coming out I'm on stock x trying to buy it. That's where I've bought all my yeezys or whatever sneaker I have

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Anyway I I get what you're saying like inventing words. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and also like the invention of words. It's like there's other languages But numbers are the same Well, like I get it. That's what I'm that's what I'm really trying to bring this back to I mean it makes sense to me No, it makes sense to me too, but it's like it's just weird that math is kind of a universal language Yeah You know, yeah, it's like this is one and like, you know, even in your language

We still know it as one singular thing. Yeah, and then you know, yeah, yeah If you if you could learn any language, what would you want to learn Spanish? I think Spanish too My mom's fucking fluent in Spanish. So you're just you're you're an asshole. Yeah She didn't she teaches me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I would I would learn Spanish because I think that's the second most Like I mean at least around here. Yeah, it would come in handy if you could speak Spanish. You're fucking hot Yeah, it makes you makes you super hot. Well other than Spanish though Italian, which is like Spanish but um If I had to pick one that like wasn't like

Damian can speak Spanish. Can he really? Uh, uh, Italian. Sorry. Oh, cool. Um, I would like French Two of my friends are fluent in other languages. Yeah, if I couldn't speak Spanish or Italian, I would speak like French I don't know people say that's like the the language of love and I'm like, I think Italian is way better Italian always sounds like it's being Yeah, that's what that you know, when I was over there, the I could listen to people talk for hours Yeah, it's just a beautiful language. It sounded like there was always just like a a fucking Orchestra playing while they're speaking. Yeah, do you think English is ugly? It's disgusting. I think it's ugly English is the worst. It's also like no actually

Russian's mad sharp. Yeah, russian's sharp. Oh, we good. Don't you see that English? I'm like, whoa Some like Asian languages are tough too because like everyone sounds so angry. Yeah, and it's like also like quick hitting. Yeah Yeah, you know what I mean? Like if you go like the racist part of our show of our show No, but it's true though. Like no, yeah, just how it sounds how it sounds like I think I see my that I'm like, oh my god I just wanted fucking rice You know what I mean? Like like I feel like they yell at each other. Yeah, but I think that I think that English is like I don't know how anyone learns English to to be honest. Yeah, and I feel like everywhere you go Everyone they know. Yeah, they know everyone speaks English. I feel like the universal language

I know the universal language shouldn't have been English. I think it's I think it's whack I think every other I I'm not even kidding. I think every other language is cooler is cooler English to me just is boring. I guess because I've like Grown up knowing it But I just feel like it's mad confusing. I know like there's words that are like We talked about this like earlier the word q Right, not q like cu like q like kiwi like the way it's spelled

My netflix shea. Yeah, like Yeah, it's like yo, how do I like to learn uh For the most part you learn The phonetics of like how things are pronounced like ch is cha. Yeah, but sometimes it's not Yeah, and ph is fuh What yeah, where did that p to me is puh and also like how do you like words like words like cheese? Yeah, that need there needs to be a z in cheese

There needs to be a cheese Yeah, or chess Like a chess or just like make it prettier. I think like english is so ugly I think english is pretty ugly It is to like we don't even have like cool little stuff on top of our letters I know people have like fucking little dots and stuff like Croatians like they have like cool little dots everywhere Like I want a dot. I would love a dot or like an enya. Those are awesome Enya or like like the thing that goes over like oh, I thought you were talking about that

Wasn't there a group called enya? I don't know, but I hope that's what it's called the thing that goes like above E's or n like the like the yeah, yeah, yeah swirl or whatever. It's it's Spanish, isn't it? Yeah, it's yield a I think I thought it was called even like yo, you know It's awesome in asian languages like how to write them Yeah, that's another thing. I don't understand too like the asian alphabets Like some of them are like whole pictures. Yeah, it's like yo, this is like I think that's awesome I think it's very cool, too. I don't know how they do it. I don't know how the fuck they know that like I saw

I lived in a small town. So like everybody knew everybody like the people like the people that lived like worked in the chinese store. Yeah, uh Lived in town. Yeah, so like I would see like they're a kid like writing in chinese. Yeah, and I was like, yeah It's incredible. It's incredible And he's just fucking going at it. I'm like, dude, I could barely spell my own name I know there that is the coolest language to I mean all the asian languages that have written that way are like I feel like that is way cooler than just a fucking a Yeah, and also like here if you show up with like any kind of an accent your penis is getting touched What's up?

Like if you have an accent and you go out and start dropping that on people And you're even like the slightest bit good-looking You're catching some pus. You don't even need to be looking. That's true You come to new york and you sound like you're from like new zealand or australia or russian or like Fucking what's the oh like a british or whatever. It's like what Someone's sucking that peepee or sucking those tts. Yeah easily easily just off the voice alone. Yeah, what'd you call your penis growing up? What's up?

You know how I feel like every kid has like a name for like their penis they use with their parents Like did you say like oh like my peepee? I didn't talk to my parents about my penis Never once as a kid. Well, I did tell that story where I thought like I got scared because of my dick shrank Yeah, what would you what were you calling your dick at that time? I think penis really? Yeah, I don't have any cool stories my parents me and my parents never had like I think I called mine peepee Yeah, yeah Still is

No, but did you ever have like the sex talk to your parents? Yeah, I never did. Yeah, my parents never talked to me Well, I had sex early though So like I told like I told my dad I had sex and like after that we really like talked about it I don't think my parents even know that it that you've had sex. Well, they I can't confirm Yeah, I haven't like ever confirmed it. You never could yeah My family isn't open like that about like sex talk really? Yeah, like obviously they like I'm being an idiot, but like I know we don't be like oh, yeah So, you know, you know when you're having sex and you fucking bend a girl

Well, you never want to think about your family having sex really I I I personally wouldn't mind having like Conversations about it and not saying like yo let's meet up every Sunday and talk about how you get nailed No, but I think sexual conversations are are good conversations Like I don't think I don't think in the right context I don't I don't believe them to be weird at all I know people who are very open with their family about it But that's what I'm saying like so I lost my virginity when I was 13

And I was very excited because it was quote-unquote cool to do right, right Got some ass, bro. Yeah, and then like nobody believes you anyway. Yeah, but um I remember talking to my dad about it and my dad like put it really really Well, like he like spoke to me like I was an adult right so I was like wow like he's like actually really talking to me Yeah, but I know my dad turned that corner and he was like and like he was kind of just like listen like You know like don't be irresponsible Like you can't like do stuff like that like you're very young like you can't be having sex But I know he turned that corner. He was like fuck. Yeah

Fox my kids fucks my kid fucks How you gonna feel when your daughter comes to you and tells you that she got Absolutely, I know that I had I had a dream. I had a dream that my first child was a girl Uh-huh and um, I I've actually thought about that like if my daughter got fucked As long as you know right now your daughter's gonna get as long as the guy is nice and I know he's nice I can't do anything. I can't do anything except be like be safe But if I know you're fucking my daughter, I'm gonna talk to you about it. Yeah, I'm gonna make it awkward I'm gonna be like, yeah, listen, man. Like that's my daughter if you guys are you guys are having fun

You need to wear protection And I'm gonna tell her too Because I feel like I would be more protective of my daughter than I would be if my son's cock Why because I feel like I would I would I would be like I wouldn't want my daughter to be destroyed by some asshole You know what I mean? I feel like the destroying goes both ways though

It can go both ways for sure But I would be more protective of my daughter in a sexual realm Because I feel like it's a sexual realm because I feel like you know as a as a girl. It's easier to get Physically taken advantage of and you should know your body and what you want and what you don't want and shit like that So I would be more protective of her Entering the world of sexuality. I get you. I get what you're saying. That's what I'm saying guys are like I'm trying to do this Like yesterday. Yeah, and it's like, you know, like I would expect my son to be as responsible as my daughter Yeah, but I almost want my my daughter to be

Even more because I know She can have a baby right and a guy can fucking leave right. That's what it is Now I hear what you're saying I feel like if I had like if I have a daughter and she's like, yo got fucked Hopefully she doesn't say it like that. But if she I feel like like I don't know if I would really care I mean, obviously I'm talking about I'm not caring on the on the level of like What you're grounded and Like I'd be like, all right

Here's what we're gonna I have I'd have a whiteboard. Yeah, and I'd be like, here's what we're gonna do. Yeah, all right We're gonna have dental dams. Yeah All right, just in case. Yep. Keep one in your wallet. All right in your backpack Your wallet or whatever the girls have wallets. I think they have like I got this guys. Don't worry about it How do they do no, they don't have they don't have wallets like us No, they have like little fucking pamphlets with with cards and just holds like millions of receipts So how why do you have so many receipts? I know and like a starbucks gift card from like 11 months ago

Use it. Yo, I swear to god when girls open their wallets And I see all these receipts. Yeah, I'm like, do you keep anything? I know. Do you give everything back? That's why it's like I need this. I was like, you bought this four years ago. Yeah And you use this item already. My sister gets packages all the time. Yeah Send shit back all the time. I'm like, do you even know your body by now? Yeah You buy more things than anyone. Yeah, sure. And you don't know what size this is. I will defend her. I will defend her Lots of places have different stuff Like their xls are not the same as everyone's xls

I'm an xl boy So for me, I need to get the right xl from the right xl spot, right? Because if I go in the nikey and put on xl Gonna be a little Sad when I go out there snuggly buggy. Yeah, but if I go to like an adidas or an h&m I'm hanging in there. Right, you know, so that the other big boys in there. Yeah. Yeah, that that I get So I'm not gonna hate her for that. Let me ask you a question though. Yes. Let me ask you about sisters Sisters having sex, right? If they're older, can you care? No, right? No, it's like you can't be like, yo, it's got my sister in yeah

So I like younger you can I think Yes, you can be like protective. Yes, because if you try to like protect your older sister who's like Having sex they're gonna be like, yo, get the fuck out of here. Yeah, I get out of here, dude You shut the fuck up. Yeah for for me when I was young that's a double standard when I was younger I used to care a lot Oh, yeah, I'm and my my sister's Four Yeah, she's like four years old. Yeah four or five years old with me

It's like a whole high school like life in college. Yeah when I was going into high school. She graduated for four years but like You know, eventually they got to the point where I'm like, dude, what the fuck am I gonna say? It's all for selfish reason too. I mean, yeah, no, it's ego is what it is. It's ego what it is You don't want to think anybody did anything with your sister Not only that, but it's like who gives a fuck people fucking people fucking right now. I know I'm looking outside There's a bunch of buildings someone's getting fucked or blown and or Fingered foot job or whatever else you want to say in one of these houses. It happens. We're all having fun out here

We're all gonna die one day. Let's come as many times as we can That's why I think sexuality Is Something that needs to be talked about at younger ages with kids. I don't think the human race Is jizzing enough. We should all be coming more. I just a lot and you want to I'm not saying you I know you I know you over there Blowing out was all over the goddamn place, but I'm talking about the rest of us I'm telling because here's why here's why no one can ever tell me

that Sex is unhealthy if it's safe No, it's great. It's great. It's great. Now. I I know they're sexual transmitted diseases I know there's ones that are good. I know there's ones that are bad. There's good by good by good I mean like ones that like you can get rid of or a non-systematic a symptomatic and like it's okay and they can go away You know no scd is good. But you know what I mean But I just think that Sometimes the remedy for a lot of people is they just need to get fucked

Getting fucked off. I mean, well Now you could be a guy and get fucked by a girl not this guy though. Why not? I don't want to get fucked You don't want to get fucked by a girl Oh, oh, I mean You just come out on the show I like I I don't want to get fucked. No getting fucked by a girl Sounds like i'm getting pegged. No, which is dildo and a I don't want to do that

They're just like fucking pound it on your on your balls like riding. Yeah, but I still think they're i'm i'm still us I still qualify that as me Fucking see I think we don't You don't give the vagina enough credit for fucking no, no, no, we give a lot of Credits of vaginas on the show. We do. Yeah, I'm just saying as a as a whole we don't give vaginas credit A girl could fuck the shit out of you Yeah, she's like very dominant. Yeah, i'm a i'm a dom though. You're dom, but I think it's hot to be a dom but like open yourself up to be domped

Not like Not like pegged in the ass. Oh, yeah, but like if you're a dom and she's a dom Fucking clashing. Yeah clash of the titans clash of the titans. Yeah, you know what I mean? That's awesome That shit is hot. Yeah, and it's tiring because you got a fight in there. Yeah, you know, sorry I felt a little bit of blood in my penis. No, I feel blood. I'm tucking. Hold on Hormone monster coming out. I put I put joe onto big mouth today Show is amazing. The show is great. It's great. That show is really fucking fun. It's really good. I you know, um When I first watch when I first saw it I had the same reaction that you did

um A lot of shows don't make me laugh even when they're comedies, but I'll still think they're very funny Yeah, you know what I mean like Seinfeld sometimes like there'll be episodes where I don't laugh But I'll be like that was hilarious Yeah, like that that literally for me, there's only been a few times if Seinfeld's my favorite show Yeah, that I know. Yeah that show though for me is more so like I'm such a fan of comedy that like when things are just Funny, even if they don't make you laugh, you can appreciate like that was so funny. Yeah, like it was well crafted It was well delivered and it's just like it was so good that I couldn't even like catch it really

You know what I mean? So that's why Seinfeld's one of those shows where I just feel like Not a lot of people would like it. I can understand how people would be like, yeah, this fucking sucks Especially now Yeah, especially now back in the day. It was like the biggest fucking thing. Yeah, but you know that's back when like people watch television like I think like the like 79 that million people watched the last one or something They played it on time square and in the on the fucking screen. Yeah, terrible terrible terrible finale though But that is a finale finale. I don't know what the fuck you're talking about over there But you know what I mean terrible finale dude finale was awful of the grand finale

Um sounds like a porno Yeah, but that show I it's one of those shows that like only if like it will make me laugh out loud sometimes. Yeah, it won't But there will be a lot of times where I'm like god, that was just so fucking funny Yeah, I love this show you look at it from like an artistic perspective and you're kind of like we make people laugh out loud Or is it like one of those things where it's like that was just funny I could never come to terms that like I I could make a complete stranger laugh Out loud, you don't think you're funny

I do I do I know I am yeah, but I'm so used to like My just me being myself Like I know I make people laugh, but it's it's more of like a uh Like wow like I'm actually funny Like it's it's more of a realization than it's like I think I'm funny If that makes any sense, I'm not really following all right So what I mean is like all right me and you together we make each other laugh right, but like we're friends Okay, and we work closely together

So like we're gonna make each other laugh right at some point. It's just it's just how it is Okay, we've had enough time to feel each other out and like see what's funny making a complete stranger laugh Is something that I take like wow I have the ability to do that especially not a lot of people can do that So to answer your question, I do think I'm funny, but I'm more taken back by it than I am like, you know, I'm funny like I'm funniest fuck You know I guess it's like We make people laugh every week, which is crazy. Yeah

No, it's great. I mean I I'm over analyzing it, but like that's just like kind of like my thought process with it If that made any fucking sense, I'll be honest. It was a little it was a little a little around around the block I'm a little over the place most of the time. Yeah, it's true. Somebody out there. Understand me, please No, no one probably not probably not But I'm always wondered that like if we are if we are if people find us funny We're like, yo, we're gonna the other day someone sent us a uh Or they mentioned us on their instagram story

and It was The person whose phone it was and a person next to them. They both had glasses of wine and they had us on the tv And I was like that always blows my mind that that honestly like when it just when I just see it It's like whatever, but then when like it comes back into my mind later on. I'm like, yo, that's Wild yeah, because I've wanted that for so long to be just like the thing that people want to see Yeah, and like I feel like this show has become that. Oh god. Here we go 8.2. It's coming up

No, I think I think people would like to hear this stuff No, but I really do think like you know from the from as long as I can remember me and Frankie You wanted to be on snl Yeah, and it was because we wanted to be performers and make people laugh and you know blah blah blah And be on tv and shit right But with the way the world is now Yeah being on tv can mean a lot of things now like you could put our show on your television screen to me That's the same thing because I just wanted to be on this machine

That you have and now we can just do that with like airplay or whatever because nobody nobody watches shit live really anymore Anyway, right unless it's like sports. It's a different world than what I then I grew up in Yeah, so it's just crazy to me that people are like and people have told me this before That's like yo mondays like come over And let's have some wine or whatever and we're gonna wash the basement. Yeah, that's like that's absurd to bring it back to my fucking mishmash of words I just never I never really saw it as a possibility

That I would be able to make people laugh on a regular basis So like being able like being given this platform like being able to like do this It's made it more real to me that I actually am funny. Yeah, that was a better way of explaining it Yeah, are you still off a little bit? Or you got all right you understood that I'm not paying attention. Yeah, I'm just looking at you and not really understanding anything You're saying it's the eyes It's the eyes. No, I'm not even like looking at you. I'm just kind of like staring through me. Yeah Old salesman trick

Shout out to died sheroot Old salesman trick. I can't even look you in the eyes. Don't look at my eyes. Look at my forehead I've tried it actually does work. What looking at foreheads. Yeah Like if I talk to your forehead, I feel like I could lie to you better You know what they say if I look you in the eyes, I feel like I can't lie. I would have to look away A lot of people when they're lying look up until the left I also heard they like touch their like necks This is a nervous thing. I think that's a nervous

Maybe this is like more of like how you're gonna be perceived like the way like you don't really know what you want to say You have to be very confident in the way that you Talk if you're gonna be lying, you know what I mean? Like you have to like but not overly confident No, you can't know you have to find that middle balance that middle thing. I consider myself a really good life Here's how to be a scumbag everybody Scumbag one-on-one on the big one. You're wondering how to be a piece of shit. Yeah, here's how you do it Don't be too confident. Here's another thing that might not be a popular opinion

I think lying is necessary in some situations like what? Like little white lies like say like you have I don't think anyone's gonna say say you have a friend, right? and You're he really wants to go out And and you really don't want to go out But you don't just want to be like I don't want to go out Hold on and you're like hold up. Are you describing what's happening tonight? Yeah, basically basically Guys we're going to trivia tonight. Danny doesn't want to come a bit. Just filling you in. But basically, what did I tell you?

I don't want to go. Yeah, I didn't make some fucking and what did I say? It's fine But I think but I think You know what I don't want to hear in situ. Oh, I gotta do that this that yeah, just cut to the chase But I feel like at sometimes those are necessary because you don't want to hurt someone's feelings I'm a little different though. Honestly like I would rather someone be like Yeah, I just don't want to because I get that. Yeah, there's times where I don't want to fucking go out on a saturday night And everyone's like going out. I don't want to go. Did I just not in the mood?

If you're not in the mood, I get that don't be like, yo, I you know, I got this thing and I'm like, well You know, this is gonna be an hour of your time You could do it before and after and like, you know what I mean? But like if you're not in the mood, dude, whatever I don't give a fuck. I would rather people be very Like honest in that regard. What am I gonna say to a grown man who's like, dude, I don't want to go. Yeah, I'd be like You should you should though. Yeah, I'm like, who am I gonna say? But if you're like, yo, I got work I'm like, well, you could do with this and then like I have the fucking options because when you give excuses like that

I can't give that excuse. I don't What you know what everything I need to do. No, I know but I'm saying like No, but I'm saying like when people give excuses. Yeah The reason why people continue to badger you is because If if I'm asking you to come out and you're like, oh, I can't I have work To me that indicates that you would like to But you can't because you have work. So I'm gonna try and offer alternatives to you. Yeah It's almost how can I make this work for you? Yeah to avoid that. Yeah, you just go. I don't want. Yeah

Yeah, and you go All right, like what am I gonna say? Like I don't like no matter what I say, he's not gonna want to go. Yeah See like For me though, it's just harder to say that it's harder to say that It's easier for me to say that in person like if I'm with the person It's so much easier for me to be like, yeah, I just don't want to go. Yeah, but like via text It's so easy to be like This is why I don't want to go

Because I don't I like I feel like if people extend themselves and ask you to hang out Like they're extending themselves to you and I feel bad being like no You you know what I'm saying, I understand it's kind of like I don't like the like the feeling of to me I'm very sensitive to that type of stuff like I wouldn't like if it's somebody's birthday Like I try to make somebody's birthday because I know how much it means to them Yeah, but like there are times people have birthdays. I don't want to fucking go Yeah Sorry, I'm also different with birthdays. Like if you don't want to come to my birthday, like I don't give a fuck

Like I'm I'm I'm offended. I do not get offended by that at all. I mean either I think birthdays are the most overrated. My birthday is february 25th. It's fucking freezing. There's snow if you don't want to come out I get it. I think I think birthdays Celebrations hate it are the most overblown So overrated bullshit now. Listen if it's like your 60th birthday Or whatever 130th like it's like a yeah, yeah, whatever like a milestone for you and you want to celebrate it like with like I'd much rather have a party with 10 people that I love Then like be like, yo, let's go to this fucking club where I don't know anyone

Yeah, and let's yell at each other for three hours Yo, you're turning 27 Yeah I don't give a fuck. Yeah, did you turn 21? Your birthdays are done until you're 40. Yes I think so I think so you're even your 30th birthday. It's like, all right Like I'm gonna be 30 in january. I don't feel like I need to do a thing I want to have some dinner with some people and hang out and if and if nobody knew it was my birthday I would stay home

I would I would stay home I get it and it's like an eat cheese and eat cake And and cry a little bit cheese and play video games. Nice That's a great birthday or cheesecake not to The birds want some Also cheesecake tastes nothing like cheese Nothing nothing. Is there cheese in it? Yeah, probably. I don't there's milk in there

That's not cheese. Yeah, but it actually it is dairy and cheese, but Yeah, like if if if somebody was like, yeah, I really want you to come to my birthday That makes me feel weird Yeah, why why? Especially because it's never like Like for me and you if I said that to you you'd be like, yeah, I'm there But like yeah, that's different. Usually it's a person who like you don't really speak too much anymore And like I really would I really want you to be there. It's like, yeah, you're really putting a lot of pressure on me

For no fucking reason. We don't really talk anymore. Yeah, like I really think like People who ask people to their birthdays Lonely lonely Yeah, dude, I'm not I'm not a big birthday guy like I feel like For me always birthdays are just like I don't really like the planet. I don't like going out on my birthday. No, I think pressure too birthdays or burdens Yo, take this shot. It's like, you and 13 other people just said that. Yeah, I'm going to die tonight. Yeah, and it's not And I know people like want to celebrate me

But if I don't really want to celebrate me, let's just not celebrate me. Yeah, like I'm turning 27 I feel like it's one of the most insignificant numbers In the world and I feel like this with mine coming up third. I'm gonna be 30. Everyone's gonna be like, yo, it's I'm depressed Let me be sad I'm halfway to 60 Word Leave me alone. Damn halfway to 60 and garbage and guess what as soon as it hits 12 o'clock

I'm 29 years and whatever minutes and hours away Oh from 60. Yeah, I'm I only stay 30 years away from 60 for one second Fuck Why did you say that? It's so depressing. Hey Keeping it how it is keeping it how it is keeping it how it is but um I have a great segue. Okay. Okay. So, you know how we were talking about the words before Yeah, and how they they're weird So, I know you were printing something out before so no because you know, well, we have to you know

How we have to cut the camera sometimes. Yeah. Yeah, so I was like, you know what? Let me just before I change the battery Let me find some stuff. So I found some words To go off the the caramel caramel situation What like words you mispronounce words that these are 24 the most mispronounced words. So I'll try to I like this Yeah, yeah, so okay. That's why you heard the printer going off. Yeah, and sorry if you got it looks a little darker in here I took me a little while to get it. All right, so All right, the first one Prescription, how do you say it prescription? You say prescription prescription. Yeah, okay

doing it wrong That's the prescription prescriptions. No one in there. My doctor doesn't say I know prescription. I'll give you a prescription Prescription prescription prescription prescription. Yeah prescription Prescription who's got that kind of time? All right sherbert You say sherbert sherbert sherbert. It's sherbet sherbet. Yes Sherbet I would have thought that sherbert like sherbet like it would be like a silent tea What's that stuff that is sorbet sorbet sorbet is fire like the lemon sorbet

What is it? You ever get your palate? Yo, that's some rich white person. No, I do that weddings. It works though It's amazing. You're gonna change your palate. Just fuck up. I know I know another thing too is just wine tasters losers losers There's some oak. There's some uh, there's some there's some cane sugar in there, you know some soft, uh Soft blueberry as well. I'm getting a hint of you know what I love. I love the It's very rich. It's very rich some oak The wine is not rich. You are rich and bored and think you know shit about wine. Oh, that's really good wine

It's great. It's great. Yeah, it's great. You get drunk and shut the fuck up. You know, Jesus Christ Sudoku I say I also say Sudoku. Sudoku. Yeah I say sa like sa like sa bra sa Sudoku. Yeah, su doku. It's su doku su doku. Yeah Su su doku doku

Sudoku. Yeah, I probably yeah, probably. Yeah. All right. So doku This was one that jumped out at me. It's very strange. Okay. Comptroller What the fuck is that? I don't know what a comptroller is comptroller, but I I know like That's how I would say it. What is it? controller Why put a p and it's spelled c o m p t r o l l e r. Is there a definition? What the fuck is a comptroller?

It says this is a really tricky one because the pronunciation looks phonetic. However, it's anything But just imagine that when you're speaking to the guy who supervises your jobs finances and accounting that you're interacting with a video remote Then you'll be square This is a riddle I didn't understand the beginning of a treasure map. What the fuck was that? Espresso Espresso espresso People say Espresso if you say Espresso, you're a fucking ass. You're an ex fucking is yet. Yeah, you're fucking ex idiot. All right gyro

It's a gyro. It's a gyro. Well, I say, you know, yeah, like just like just like piss like oh, here. Oh, yeah Oh, can I have a gyro? It's like tatsiki. It's a gyro tatsiki. Yeah You say how do you say it again tatsiki tatsiki? I say tatsiki So I'm well, I think we're both wrong. You had it. You had it. I mean we probably are I had like a tater tot Yeah, tater tot ziki tot ziki kibosh kibosh like a kibosh. Yeah kibosh It's kibosh No, it's not yesterday's look

Doing it wrong kibosh doing it right kibosh Unfortunately, if you want to put the kibosh on something You're saying it wrong. It's kibosh. Whatever Uh, number nine Celtic. It's actually Celtic. I think we both know that I know Celtic. I know Celtic It's the Boston Celtics. Everything else is Celtic. Yeah. Yeah that that one I knew. Yeah candidate How do you say it? Um, I like kind of flip-flop candidate and candidate. Actually, no, I say candidate. You say candidate. Yeah

I don't say candidate. I don't say candidate either. You say candidate. I say candidate. Yeah, me too So I think uh candidate is right Can a date is wrong candidate. Yeah I say candidate. Yeah, I say candidate. A candidate is harder to say. Yeah, it just feels weird coming out of my mouth. Yeah Asahi Yeah, I think we're good on that. I tell you what the first time I saw that word. I was like a chi I said a chi too. I actually said a chi ordering it one time And someone was like this fucking asshole at a smoothie king. Do you remember smoothie kings? Hell, yeah

I went to a smoothie king and I was like, can I get the a chi berry and like the girl behind me started laughing at me Fuck that bitch. Yeah, fucking bitch. Um cash a What is that? C-a-c-h-e Let's catch Or cash cash a oh, it's cash. It's cash though cash. Yeah, that's like when you're clearing history Yeah, yeah, I don't know why you say cash a I've always said cash a I was like, what the fuck is cash a that sounds bad like

Like a fabric that's like expensive cash a So go ahead. Well, it's a it's exactly like this word here. This merch is made out of cash a yeah 100% cash a 100% cash a this one um niche Yeah, but a lot of people say niche. I've never heard. Oh, yes. Find your find your niche finding my niche. Yeah. Yeah. It's niche Yeah, I can't niche me. I used to think those two things those were different things because I remember people saying like find your niche

But when I see that word I'm like niche Yeah, I always thought niche was different niche and cash a are are kind of the same thing Yeah, cash and niche. Yeah cash niche cash niche. All right I I don't think I pronounced it. Let me see. Maybe you could do it. Which one? Which one are we up to? Uh the the one with ch Chicanery chicanery immediately doing it wrong chicanery pronounced it right is

Chicanery Sean Connery Yeah Chicanery Chicanery. Yeah, I feel like it's mad dark in here. Should I turn lights on? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, hold on Sean Conner, you know what I mean? I just think I don't even know what that word means I don't even I honestly don't even know what that word means um All right, all right

Much better, I don't know what that looks like but no, no, no, no, no, it's fine. I turned them on here Um All right, go ahead. Chicanery. All right. Uh asterisk Asterisk. Yeah, I say asterisk asterisk. Yeah asterisk. It's asterisk No, I don't say risk. I say asterisk asterisk What is this? Aster risk Warrior one warrior one. No, uh

Asterisk doing it wrong ass tricks and asterisks are wrong when we're both wrong. Yeah, we're both wrong But I say asterisk. I say asterisk Like literally like a trick with your ass. Yeah That's what I say. Yeah, what else we got? Um Agus What is that? I don't know just reminds me of that kid from the Uh dispelling me niggas niggas. Yeah

Can you use it in a sense? Agus agus It's but it's pronounced igus. It's aegis. I don't even know if that is to be honest We should skip that. All right, uh prerogative It's my prerogative. Yeah, we you say prerogative. Yeah It's my prerogative. It's prerogative Get the fuck out of here. That's hard word to say go into the dictionary and change it at this point. I know I know

prerogative Prerogative, I don't have any that. I don't have that time. That hurts my brain. Yeah I'm gonna have a nosebleed in five seconds. All right, Hermes Like the brand. Yeah, isn't it Hermes? It's air mess Air mess like air like air jord like a sneaker. Yeah, like air mess air jet. It's air mess Chipotle Well, yeah chipotle. It's cheap

Chip cheap chip oat lay chip oat lay chip oat lay not chipotle Chipotle chip oat lay chip oat Cheap It is cheap. Not really. Remember when chipotle was going out all that fucking like, uh, what's that shit called? Free guac. No, no, no No, it was like a disease. It was like a oh Uh, uh, uh, salmonella. What's the no, I was the one that like the chicken. It's in shit. E coli. E coli. Yeah Yeah, yeah, it was in all their chickens. Yeah disgusting disgusting. I've never had it

You know, I've never had chipotle. Really? I've never had cheap oat lay Cheap oat lay. Yeah, I'm not I'm not down Electoral Yeah, the electoral electoral Yeah, but Tell me if I'm look at us. It's spelled the same way, but like the words are bent Electoral electoral electoral or electoral. Oh, that's what they're doing. They're shifting where the uh emphasis is electoral Is wrong. Yeah, it's electoral electoral

It's electoral Elec electoral electoral, I guess. God. Are we this dumb like election electoral Electoral I say electoral. I say electoral. Yeah, I know kid high school used to say blockbuster and I'm like, no See like fucking ukrainian. No, it was fucking irish a blockbuster All right, and this one Is going to blow the minds Of the masses what number is this because this is the last one. Oh, yeah, let me see Oh, yeah, we flew through these

Yeah, this is the last one. Oh, no, no, no, no. There's one more two more primer Like paint primer. Yeah primer. It's primer How are we all getting this wrong pr. I am M-u-r-r the people at home at home depot say primer. Yeah, I'm saying primer It makes no sense. I don't know primer Sp-spurious I don't even know what the fuck that means. I don't know what that is either spurious

You got it. Did I? Yeah, I was joking around. No, yeah, that's the right way to say it I was the right way to say it spurious. I have no what do you think that word means? I don't know like spur of the moment to like Very spurious. Yeah, like uh Spontaneous sounds right. I'm gonna go with it affluent Affluent. Yeah, that's how I say it affluent affluent, yeah I mean, all right. Fuck that word. I'm never gonna use it again. All right. Here's the one though Here's the one that's gonna fuck you up. It's gonna blow the minds of people all around people will debate this

I don't even know if I could do this Dr. Seuss right Yes, dr. Seuss like cat in the hat dr. Seuss. Yeah, that's wrong His name is sue is Dr. Sue S. No, it's dr. Sois Yes He's dr. Sois. He's dr. Fucking sois

Like soy sauce. Yes soy sauce and ice sois dr. Sois My whole life is a fucking lie all my books i've read Yeah, dr. Seuss dr. Seuss is cat in the hat. It's dr. Sois, bro Dr. Sois. Yeah Do you know what the quick trivia do you know what dr. Seuss is? dr. Sois dr. Sois's real name is

Theodore geisel That's his name's not even sois at least no He made it up Whole life's been a lie. I feel like my entire childhood's a lie. How can every I'm gonna fight this guy if I ever meet Is he dead? He's he's been dead. Where's his grave? I'll dig him up and beat the hell out of his corpse I don't even know what he looks like sending me through this kind of fucking This is ridiculous. You know, it's weird. I always pictured dr. Seuss Like he actually looked like the cat in the hat for some reason. I felt like he was like a really tall man. Yeah

Not good-looking. No great smile though. Awesome Yes, definitely wear glasses. Yep And smoked a pipe. Yeah Yep, dr. Sois those so those were Some words that are dr. Fucking sois dr. Sois if there's one thing you take away from this podcast Is that you've been saying dr. Seuss wrong all the time? And by the way, if you're one of the people out there that knew that before going into this and you're like, oh, I knew it was sois Fuck you

You're fucking shut up. Yeah, you're a liar. You're full of shit. No one fucking cares Yeah, I don't care if you knew about sois if I read great american secrets Yeah, if I read one comment that's like, oh, you guys didn't know it was sois I'm gonna perm a bit in you Perm a bit. Yeah. Yeah, it's probably not even how you pronounce that. I know it's probably perm a band perm a band And then you know, I say people some people say potato potato No one's no one says potato. Who the fuck says tomato? No one No one it's bullshit. It is

It is bullshit that I know you're now you're pronouncing that right. Well, I'm trying bullshit. I tried my best Yeah, would you ever run with the bulls? Hell, yeah, I don't think I would do it. I'm pretty I've got I got I'm side to side. I mean I tore my ACL so I don't have a whole lot of lateral movement No, but you can go straight. Yeah, I can drive like if you were if you're just running straight I could do it, but I'm pulling out early like I'm running like, oh my god first fucking Bishrow I'm cutting into there. I'm out of there. No, I I'd want to make it to the to the stadium to the square to the stadium, right? My buddy did that. He did it really? Yeah

I think he fell too and he got up and like Jesus. It's scary, bro. Do people die? What a weird thing? Yeah Oh, fuck. Yeah. I don't know what they die every year. There's also another thing. I think they do in spain It's a called a tomato fight. I know that the tomatoes are kind of hard Unless they're like like, uh, what's the word like? I'm no fucking word. I'm thinking of Ripe not ripe the opposite of that Not ripe unripe not stale. It's like hard. No unripe. What's the word unripping? Spoiled spoiled. That's not I don't know what I'm okay

After this fucking list, I don't know anything and after this beer. It's not helping at all Okay, so that I would do that But I feel like listen, I'm not a professional athlete at all But I could hurt you with a tomato if I fucking threw it at your face You give me a tomato right now and I hit you in the face. We're probably not going to be friends for at least a week Yeah, and these glasses are going to break and I'm going to have a black eye. Yeah Banana do you eat it with that black shit on it? Yeah, I eat it too. What's the big deal? Yeah, I'll eat a dark banana unless it's like

Like to the point where it just falls apart if it's falling into the middle of the banana like you know when you bite a banana And you just see like if it's just the outside. Yeah, if it's just like a surface kind of bruise I'll eat it But if it's if it's making its way inside if it's making its way inside if it's spreading I might I might do a little all right. So and when you eat corn, do you go side to side or do you rotate? I rotate I rotate It's all a guy eat a thing of corn

He puts a chopstick through Like the actual kernels Because they're all connected to the to the cob Picks it off and eats it like that Fuck that guy. I know that's way too much work. Just put it on there. No, I mean have sex with him. That's a great guy Oh, really? Who's having I think that's too much. It's a lot of engineering. That's a lot of engineering I remember when you were a kid you would get those two little forks that were shaped like corn

Yeah, put it in the side of your thing that person probably made millions of dollars with that millions You never see them anymore genius. You never see those. I know Good old days. I also hate when people cut Their corn off the cob. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like be a fucking person. Would you you know what? I also hate shucking corn Oh those little hairs. They got those little fucking pubes Got to go in and get them out Do you put butter on your corn do I put butter on my corn some people don't which are fucking psychos

Get those people out of here. Put butter on my corn. I'll put whatever on my corn. There was yeah There was like soak it in butter street corn Sweet corn street corn is like corn like you would get like at like a like a like a falafel place It's very good, but other corn Sweet corn not a fan really Megan though Megan though Um, I think we can wrap this up. Yeah, I have to get the trivia so I can try and win a $50 bar tab Imagine this fucking dr. Seuss this question comes up

Oh my god I'll I'll literally scream out loud. I got it. Fuck it's so ice. Yeah So so it's I'm so so it sounds like moist. Yeah Yeah, anyway, that is all for this week's episode of the basement yard. Uh, uh, well, sorry, it's all good Um, dany, where can they find you at dany low priority on instagram and twitter Just wanted to do a quick shout out. Thank you everybody that's been buying the still fat merch I'm trying to reply to everyone that is so awesome and I appreciate it so much and we're still on the path to greatness And being fat is not wrong. It's a lifestyle that chooses you

You don't choose the lifestyle But no seriously exercise Seriously, we all are gonna do some but we should all exercise And uh, yeah, you guys can go follow us on uh, instagram at the basement yard and definitely check out our patreon patreon.com Slash the basement yard and that is all see you guys next time