The Basement Yard - #209 - What Do My Dreams Mean?

Episode Date: September 30, 2019

On this episode, Danny kisses a boy...kind of. We also try to find out what our dreams mean. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I Welcome back to the base me art. How's everyone doing Danny including yourself? How are you doing man? I'm doing quite well Awesome, sir stashed up again. I see stashed up stashed up. You know I'm saying I thought I would just go for like a real creepy Look these days. Yeah, you kind of look like a biker, but like he biked 30 years ago I got kicked out of the gang. Yeah, I don't have my vest anymore. Yeah, what's that called again? You're cut your cut your cut or your crest. I don't know what it is. I don't know. I watched a lot of colors Your colors. No, the didn't like sons anarchy didn't like burn somebody's tattoo off. No, they just black it out You can't can you burn a tattoo? Yeah

I don't know. I thought they just colored the whole thing in and it was just all black on their back No, you think you're gonna get another tattoo. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah for sure this winter. I'm gonna get something Have you thought how you started thinking? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I've been thinking too. Maybe. Yeah. Yeah, but my all my tats are gonna be small Tiny ones tiny ones. Yeah until you get a big one until I get a big one Keep them small. Yeah, are you gonna get on your hand or something? I'm thinking maybe whoa hand tat. Yeah, but like somewhere like close like maybe here Like a thumb the base of my thumb little thumb tat. Yeah, nice I don't know. I was thinking about it last night, but it's now that now that I'm thinking about again. It's a stupid idea

Are you gonna share with the class? Yeah, I'm gonna share with the class. I was gonna get the Rolex crown. Oh my god This little Why like this size? Why? Because I don't know. I think it's a cool logo. Oh my god guys. What? Don't do that. What are you gonna get? I was you know what I was actually gonna do what I was gonna go to a tattoo shop in Utah and get like a The branch that I held on to on the side of the mountain. I kind of cool. Yeah, that would be fun. That'd be cool I'm starting. I feel like I'm getting to the point where now when you get one

You start to realize like all right. Well, and then it's also like oh stuff would look cool there Well, it's not even that it's like I feel like it's one of those things that like when when you get caught in the rain And you're like Soaking wet. Yeah, and then it stops raining, but it starts to rain again, but you're still wet You're like, well, I don't care now like I'm already wet. You have no problem It's kind of like that. It's kind of like that with tattoos now. I don't like I don't care if I get like a funny thing Where would you put it? High on the thigh high on the thigh. Yeah, because you can hide that

Yeah, I mean it was something you'd only see if I was wearing like a bathing suit. Yeah, that's what Europe I say, I think it's cool to have tattoos that like you can't see all the time But even if if you can see them all the time, it's like there has to be some kind of like decoding process Yeah, you know, you know, it was mad funny. Uh, there was a lot of people when I got my tattoo. They were like Leaving quotes on all my pictures or like whatever like I'll never get a tattoo. Joe Sanagato. Joe 2019 Here you are and I'm like Cool, man. I mean a part of it's like a part of it's cool to know people like uh Follow you that closely

But then like a part of you is like guys, you know, like I guess it's the first I can change my mind I guess this is the first time anyone's ever changed their mind in their life. I know But like I think tattoos are getting to a place where Dude, I don't know how people get tattoos of like a cat's asshole as their belly button or whatever dude The thing for me is like, you know, go on vacation You're out like on the beach and like Greece and then a bunch of greek people are like, is that a cat's anus on your stomach There's a lot of people that do that like, uh, like if they lose like their fantasy football league

Like they have to get like a tattoo or something. Yeah, but that's yeah, but like see I then I'd you know Something like the crown like a small thing. You know what I'm saying? Like but don't fucking no no No, I'm not gonna put like a Rolex crown like on my cheek No, but I'm saying like if someone got like a little thing where I was like Like a poop emoji or something like, okay, cool. It's whatever. It's but not like a big Fat no anus. No at the set. You know what I'm saying? Stevo's tattoo on his back of him just like Yeah, dude. I rock. You know, he has to regret that. Oh, yeah

I think he's he's said it multiple times like I I could see you with like maybe some kind of a sleeve Maybe I don't know if I'll ever have a sleeve. I don't think I have to build off of this I might just build off of that. Maybe go a half I don't know. You could do that. But that that honestly, I would I would never just get like, oh, you know It'd be cool if I just added smoke to this whole thing like I would just fill it up Yeah, random shit like would you let it go to your here or like up to your hand? No, I wouldn't get my hand I think I'm too like like not I'm not cool enough for that Yeah, like you have a hand tattoo like you're a bad motherfucker and I'm like a pussy. So like I'm not gonna do that

Would you ever tat a finger? I would tat like I want to get a little bird right here A bird? Yeah, looks like a little bird. What bird? I don't know What are these ideas that have no meaning whatsoever? You just want to but I'm also like a firm believer that tattoos like sometimes like they don't have to mean But like even a little thing even something You don't even know what bird you don't even know if it looks cool If it looks cool, I'm a firm believer though that if it looks cool to you, that's what it is

Well, that yeah, that's a reason or like there's always tattoos where it's like, you know, this fucking looks stupid And some of them do yeah like it like that's a collective hole. It's a stupid fucking tattoo Yeah, but if you fucking like it you fucking like it. That's what I'm saying But that cat asshole belly button's a stupid tattoo. I mean, it's an asshole. You don't tat ass holes onto your fucking no You don't tat ass holes onto yourself. You asshole. I have one asshole And that's it and it's not getting tattooed anywhere unless I made like a mold Or made it or made it like on traceable paper. Have I asked this before would you make a mold of your asshole and sell it? Sell it. Yeah, so someone could pound your butt

Oh, you mean like do the whole like yeah, yeah, yeah like what also does yeah Oh, like sitting a clay like yeah bucket for like 10 hours How many assholes do you think you would sell fucking be honest, dude? How many I don't know. I think I could sell a pretty good amount of assholes. You think you could Do if if yeah, yeah One of these companies got wouldn't you do it to sell my anus? Yeah, and they just know that people were just pounding that ass. Yeah, but I don't know if they're pounding the I mean if you track the sales

Sanagato store.com right now. I feel like people would just buy I feel like people would just buy just because it's funny like, uh, you know, you know that guy That's his asshole. That would be hilarious. I think you should do it, dude Okay. Okay. Okay. First of all, relax. All right. I'm just saying this could be a nice lucrative business venture Happen now some fucking random place in like New Jersey is gonna end me up like we actually sell assholes I'm gonna be like, uh, you wouldn't turn your ass face the music You know turn your ass onto a pocket a pocket rocket. I should I should monetize my anus Dude, I'm almost scared. Why the fuck not. I'm scared of that. Why because I feel like I

I don't know if I believe in voodoo or not And I feel like if someone's pounding my ass and like my ass gets itchy I'm like, wait, am I is my ass itchy because someone in like north korea is like banging my ass right now You've always been like that about like I don't know like like like, uh, voodoo people and mediums They scare me man. I don't know. It's the unknown All I'm saying is if some guy In fucking the ukraine Is just like finger in my butt my fake rubber anus that he bought on the internet

I don't think it's I don't like I'm a big believer in energy So maybe he could transfer some of that energy into my real aim And I could start to feel a little like whatever when I'm out with my parents at dinner or something I don't want to have to like feel a ukraine finger finger when I'm trying to eat trick and parm Yeah, but but what it feels good You're putting a negative connotation on it. It might feel nice. It might feel nice But not at not at chicken parm dinner with my parents. Yeah. Yeah. Nobody wants to come with their parents. That's true First of all, why are you just under the assumption that this ukraine man can make me come? Listen, man

If this guy's paying for international shipping, you better make you come I mean, that's true if it is international, but we don't know where they're gonna set up the the warehouse It could be in the ukraine I feel like most things start in the ukraine that are like scary. Yeah, then they branch off then they branch off Go to like Russia a little bit. Yeah, whoa Was what I don't know. They probably tap in this fucking podcast right now No, but like even though like back on the thing of like tattoos, I feel like tattoos can like help with confidence You know, oh really? Yeah, I think some people get confident after they get like tattoos

Yeah, because they want to like show it off. So like I look fucking cool, dude Yeah, yeah, like a part of you. It's like that's why like little ones because it's like you can't see them Like you can't even see that if I do that and it's like You can conceal them in plain sight kind of Yeah, I don't even really Know that I have one most of the time. Well, that thing was like a baby You were like, I don't know why it won't stop peeling Something's going on with me. That literally was not me at all. It was the complete opposite. It didn't peel

No, no, no, but you were like you when you get tattoos, you baby them But I wasn't I was making sure it didn't get infected, but it didn't even peel Like I was I mean it peeled like a tiny bit, but I was waiting for it to be like, yo, is it gonna like do this crazy thing The thing that's what's the crazy thing like because everyone's like dude It's gonna peel it's gonna itch like fucking and it never like was crazy. It was just very simple that cream is fantastic Yeah, dude. I mean, I didn't you didn't cream it. No, no, no, I did I'm saying I didn't use it to jerk off because I was afraid of getting it inside my hole And you know, that's all kinds of of burning. Yeah. Yeah, of course. That's another that's like the top actual honor penis

Yeah, it was just it sets your dick on fire like it's like 273 kelvin But I if I I just feel like Knowing that substance and feeling it. I know that if I had used it Fuck yeah, that would have been a Wednesday, dude When's the last time you used like some lotion though? No, I'd never I have not never but like not in a long time Yeah, yeah, yeah, but definitely I've experimented with you know, I've never used lube Dude, I've used lube. I use l'oreal sometimes, you know, I'm saying l'oreal gets there I've used soap which was not the best idea

But I feel like when you use like lotion sometimes I get too like stuck at the top of my penis I can't get all the way down you get stuck like like, you know, because it's like so slippery that it's like And like it's like It's like holding a wet like bar of soap. Yeah, it's hard to hold on and grasp my dawn Right, you know Yeah, because it's it's too slippery. It could get a little tricky That's why you got to go to the gym and do deadlifts because it gives you grip strength. Yeah, that's too. That's too. Well, I

I could grip the shit out of my dick Yo, you ever wake up and just like Feel like I can't make a fist right now Yes, because you sleep on your fucking your tendons in your hand and it happened to me like four days ago I was having a fucking stroke. I feel like that just happens to me sometimes and I wake up and I'm like I can't make a fist like I could just open up my hand very easily and I don't know it scares me Yeah, it's sometimes when you sleep like this When you sleep like that

But uh, yeah, but like I think people get like tattoos for like confidence like if they feel They want it for that reason Yeah, I mean Listen, I think and like emotional reasons do they go? I think when I was a kid I just always was like, you know what? I'm just not gonna make this decision and like blah blah blah This wasn't the reason I didn't get tattoos, but I think Now looking back on it. I wouldn't recommend getting them when until you're at least like 22 or 23 years old

Only because when you're 16 to 21 you think a lot of shit is cool and it's fucking not Yeah, you know unless it's for a very sentimental reason family member passes away or it's something Super meaningful or like this picture that's been in your family for so long or blah blah blah But I've even seen ones like that and I'm like, dude, that's come on Yeah, but like even if like you want to get a tattoo for your mom and your mom's still alive Dude, just wait till 23. Just I'm telling you just just give it a time or until your mom does one or just wait until she Croaks. Yeah, just wait until she croaks and then now nobody can fucking make funny

Exactly. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, get out. Yeah, exactly. And like the other thing like I want to talk about will come Your mom's not gonna die She might But uh, oh my god, Jesus. Yeah, no, but um, I was listening to uh uh shot one one of shah's podcast right and uh, uh, brennan chow. Uh, he was talking about uh Somebody emailed him and it was like a bald guy. Yeah, and uh, was saying like, you know, I'm losing like confidence like from like being bald

And like he's he was saying like, yo, like I know like bald guys that like fuck or whatever But like I started to think about it like this. I was like, yo, if I ever started going bald It would be a wrap for me. Why because it's like, yo, it's like One my brother jarred's bald. Mike's bald. Yeah, my dad's bald. Yeah, I'm the only one not bald So like I'm winning that argument every time I think you would know by now I think I would know by now, but you never know though. You're 30 Yeah, yeah, and like I still have all my hair But you know, even if you're if if you go bald in your 40s

hairs Yeah, yeah, but I still want it though. Sure But like once you hit 40 if you still have hair, whatever Yeah, but if you see like if you see like 40 year old guys with hair They look hotter Yeah, but what are you doing in your 40s? You're banging 19 year olds No, but you still want to unless you work on wall street. It's not happening right when you're You know what I mean? I mean the town or like, yeah, I know you're just saying you want to be popular amongst the PTA means

Yeah, like I want the moms to be like, oh Yeah, do you want them to dress up? He's still got all his hair. Yeah, that's silver. Fox. Yeah, and then I show up, you know, like Fashionably late, but I did it on purpose. They're all wearing their pearls Yeah, they're all wearing their pearls They're all wearing their pearls They're all wearing their pearls You know, like Fashionably late, but I did it on purpose. They're all wearing their pearls. Yeah. Yeah. They know they say

Danny's here. Danny's here. You with the hair. Danny with the hair. My bald husband would never look like that You can't look me in the eyes and tell me right now that if you started Going bald in the back of your head that you wouldn't be upset. Oh, I'd be super upset. Yeah I think I think it would really hurt me emotionally. Yeah, I would be very very upset Um, would you take like propitians and Rogan and shit isn't propitia the thing that is That's I know alopecia. Okay, propitia alopecia. Peaches the peaches put the peaches together. Yeah Like a puzzle. Yeah, I mean that was lesbian scissoring that you did there. Yeah, I saw like and can we fuck girls like this? Can we scissor with them with our dicks? Yeah, we could yeah, but it would probably hurt because you got to like fold your boner down

That's fine It's not fine. You ever fold your boner down. Yeah, it hurts. Yeah, I mean, it's it's some pain But I mean it's it is pain that I'm willing to deal with. Yeah, it's good hurt But would you you'd scissor? I mean, yeah, I'd scissor hard in theory. You could yeah, but I feel like wait Is she facing we're facing different ways? So she's looking that I think you're I'm then I'd go this way. I'm doing that and then I'm here. Yeah. Yeah, see. Yeah, we're facing different ways This is this is nice from a distance. Yeah, this I feel good just doing this

I can't your foot's bothering me though. You know, you're not a big feet guy Not a big foot guy, but yeah, but like I think balding in men You know, yeah, because you know females can go bald too to give you the short answer if I started balding right now Yeah, I would I would be upset you would take steps to not go bald. Yeah, I would I would I would see I think that I would just I would accept it but just like really feel sorry for myself See and that's the thing I think that I think that uh I think that if I started to notice it and it was bad like if I had a very thin patch on the back of my head That's usually like the first one, right?

Uh, no, some of them have the receding hairline. Yeah, but I feel like everyone's hairline recedes. Yeah at some point, but yeah Like I feel like I have like at In your 20s, your your hair your body starts to like get older. Yeah. Um, and I think I've already seen the like Received but it's so minimal because like I always freak out. I'm like wait, you know But I've oh, yeah, so you have premature freakouts too. I have them too Like if I rub my hair too much in the shower and I'm like, this is way too much hair dude Yeah, because if you wear hats and then do that, yeah, I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa Yeah, the thing is like I've always had a high hairline like on the right side of my head goes up high

Yeah, so like when my hair is a certain way Sometimes it's like, yeah, what did you have brain surgery? Like, why does it go like it's it's like it look it just looks strange So, uh, I've always had brain surgery. I've always had like a bigger forehead. Yeah, right, which it's not like huge fat old Fucking head. Yeah. Look at this bad boy. That's that that's fine. No, it's not that bad No, but I used to get buzz cuts. You could tell we're already like sensitive because like we've been yo, it's not that bad It's not terrible. No, I'm really not that like crazy about it but You used to get you used to get uh baldies

Yeah, I used to get buzz cuts all the time. So my forehead was like gigantic But I never even thought about when I was younger. So no one no one never said anything But then I started to notice it and I'm like, I got a pretty big forehead there But it's like, you know, it's whatever but you hide it with your hair now you say Is that what you're saying? No, I don't I don't not hard to hide your forehead. You can't hide a forehead You get bangs. I don't like pull my hair back If that's what you mean, do you think you'll ever grow hair like long I would love to do that one. Why don't you just do it one time?

I don't know. You just try to grow your hair long right now No, because you got kind of long hair right now. Just keep it clean. I can't I'm not established yet Not established yet. I would say you're established. I wouldn't I have big dreams, man. And you can't be like a Biker dude. Not break the mold. No, I'm just not creature only. I'm not cool enough for long hair. Yes, you are Yo, those fucking eyes, bro. I have kidding me. Listen. I have great eyes, but I got soft What color those eyes again? I don't know Like hazel maybe they're greeny. They're green. That already makes you rare That's not what you know how rare it is to not have brown eyes

You got brown eyes fucking deep chestnut. Those are deep chestnut. Those look like Oh, it looks like the side of a house in hunter mountain. God damn right fucking lighter fire in these eyes but but with you it's like I never really noticed because like they have like a small hint of brown in them Yeah, when you look into my eyes, it's kind of like looking into kaleidoscope. Yeah, there's a lot of difference There's moving parts. Does any Keith has brown eyes, man. I don't know my own eyes You think I know other people's eyes. Shannon has blue eyes Shannon has blue eyes. Yeah, what color eyes Do your mother have nothing? I have no idea

I don't even know if she's has eyes. Does your dad have eyes my dad's got eyes He's got eyes. He has the only eyes in the family that don't require Contacts or glasses. How does that work? Oh, yeah, your mom, but he's deaf So he traded his hearing in for for his sight. So yeah, I mean I would I would trade my hearing in for my sight He used to dig his ears out with your dad still has hair. Yeah, he's got hair. Yeah, so my mom's dad didn't have hair Which I think that's where that comes from Thomas has the hair. Yeah Everyone has their Keith has his hair everyone the my house nobody bald in your family. It doesn't make sense My mom's dad was bald. Okay. I never met him

But I thought you're supposed to get your mom's dad's hair. Isn't that like a tall tail? Yeah. Yeah. It's like it's your mother's dad Yeah, how does that that's bullshit. I don't know, but we all have our hair. My dad has his hair Uh, but my cousins one of my cousins who are sanogados They are all like thinning gross No, they're they're just they're they're thinner Yeah, but even their dad has his hair, but it's like thin, but it still holds on. Yeah, but But like see like for me. Listen I'm a fat boy. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, you're a fat boy. So but like

It's all right. So like In my fat state right now. I'm vulnerable. You know what I'm saying? I'm a vulnerable fat man I don't believe it for a second. We go ahead. No, no, but you know what I'm saying Like if I was losing my hair too. Yeah, I I I'd probably phone it in you probably wouldn't have that mustache. No, I'd have a fucking beard though Yeah, you gotta get a big beard. Yeah, I would get like beard implants I'd be like, you know, fuck this hair in my head. Just let me have the coolest fucking beard. I've seen you have a big beard Yeah, yeah, yeah, but like I want like a cool one like uh your boy

Rob Fucking Robby Beards. Yeah got a beard on a big Rob. Yeah, and I see and he does it right Yeah, big guy. Let me grow the beard. Yeah, and he's like a solid big guy. He's like a keg Like, you know what I mean? Like you can't move bullets would fly off of this man. Yeah Now If I were to go bald though in this physical state that I'm in now I'd have to shut things down emotionally for like at least 72 hours. No, I think that if you yeah 72 hours for sure, but I think that uh

If you went bald, yeah, and you just like Maybe dropped 20 pounds and then just worked out like crazy. You'd be fucking killing it. Yeah, and had a beard. Yeah But like look at me because I need the beer because if When when I lose 25 pounds I'll still have a little little at you know what I'm saying a little under neck. Yeah some next stuff. Yeah, exactly I'll still have that. You know, you know, but if I grow a beard and drop 25

This jawline gonna be popping a little bit. So then if I have the beer, go hide it. It's gonna look sexy I'm honestly looking forward to that scat Don't do that. Also. You just said scat. I'm pretty sure that's like poop sex Scat is poop sex. Isn't that poop sex? No scat is like jazz like scooby-da-ba-ba-doop-da-doop. No, but I also think scatting is like poop I'm pretty sure scatting is poop. No scattering. Maybe no like scattering your poop about No, that's not it. That'd be so weird like listen. I've done some weird scats poop for sure scat scat poop. It's a card game I'm gonna type in scat poop

Scat scat poop Is that what it is? It's in reference to wild animal dropping. So no domestic animals. So like scatter this poop scatter. I mean, it's just scat. It's just like you know How'd you fucking know that random fact about scat being shit? I don't know man I talked to a lot of people on other people's lives and I feel like that was mentioned Oh, okay. So what did you play like red dev redemption before this?

Fucking like looking through shit No, but like probes. Yeah. No, but I mean, yeah, I'm fat. So like If if I lose my hair It's gonna make me feel worse now Here's what I'll say about the losing hair thing, right? Okay If I was losing my hair, I would do everything I can to like save it Why though? Because I'd rather have my hair because I've had my hair with the whole whole time and also

I think the biggest thing when it comes down to is just change. You were so sincere I feel I felt like I hurt your feelings I think it comes from just change like if you have An afro and then you shave it and you just have like a buzz cut now That still is going to be like a big thing where you're kind of insecure about it because it's not how you looked for so long I'm emotional anytime. I cut my hair if it's long That's what I'm saying like when you when you go through change like that and with bald I don't necessarily think

There's like I think there's a negative connotation to it But not really because there's bald dudes that like you don't even think about them being bald. Yeah You only think about bald people who are like holding on to their hair So I wouldn't do that in my personal opinion if I had like Like the george castanza. I probably would just try it out and be like, let me just go full baldy here Like you got an like you got to know obviously that like your hair looks like shit Well, I think it's like it doesn't look that bad today So it's like I'll comb it over and like it'll look all right

But on on like you see I feel bad for you like feel the top of your head like skin And it's like gone. Just try out the full bald get those natural oils going Yeah, because yo, it'll be weird for like three months and then people just know that you're bald Yeah, it wouldn't even be a thing. You know what I'm saying? No, it's kind of hot girls with shaved heads I kind of like that. I think that should as hot, bro. Yeah, it's kind of it's exotic Yeah, it's exotic it makes me think of like In the movie 300 where like there's that pharaoh and everyone's like getting their Fucking ass sucked on this on the side. Yeah

And I'm like, oh my god, these bitches are in gold chains. So I don't know if they're slaves, but the chains are really expensive So is it theirs? Yeah. Yeah, it's like high caliber like at least to treat them. All right Yeah, like if you're if I if I was gonna be like in prison to a pharaoh And I had like a 24 karat gold chain Still be upset, but I'd feel better than people who just have the whole iron Yeah, like if someone comes in here and snaps a pic. I'm gonna be iced out. That's what I'm saying at least Yes, exactly But I couldn't tell if it was like I thought they were connected to other girls

So I didn't know if this was like a whatever but those chicks had shaved heads and I was like, it's kind of fucking hot So it reminds me of that shit. Yeah. Yeah of like these fuck dungeons inside pyramids or something a buzzed head For me is like it's kind of hot Because I want to rub your head. It's like I'd rather rub your head than have sex with you at that point I'll just be like, yeah, can I rub your head? You'd rather have a cat So it's kind of like having a cat. No Or what? I'd rather pet a person you rather pet a better woman on our head with this mustache. I shouldn't be saying things

But no, I think girls with shaved heads are hot um, but like I even think of it like this like Like girls they go bald like they have like thinning hair Like that shit's so trash, dude Because like their hair like I feel like Like uh, what's the word the the status quo is for them to have like long hair, you know Yeah, and then it's like you have to fight that like a man's status quo like we're supposed to go bald I don't know about that. Yeah, I think so. It's like a part of like it's a part of like, oh, you're getting older

Like I'm an old bald dude You know, it's different if girls are like losing their hair and shit. It's way different. Yeah I actually know somebody that has uh, some condition where there's just a straight up spot Oh a female. Yeah On uh, her head, um But she was cool about it like she put out this thing on instagram and she was like You know, this is my thing. Yeah, and like whatever, but it's like with with that So that's cool

But I would have never known that because I guess it's easier to hide when you have longer hair because again, whatever you said You could like push it back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you put it up So it's it's easier to to hide I guess but I can see how that's very You know, it it takes a toll on it. Yeah I think it's it's a tough thing because it's something you can't really control and that goes for like anything really that you have That people because we were just talking about a little bit before we started this But I'm sure there's something that everyone has even if like you're like yo this person looks perfect But they have something that they're like, oh my god. Fuck this. They probably wake up and hate every day

Yeah, they're like, oh my god. Look at this. Fuck it. Look at this What are you doing? I do this every morning. You just grab it and you kind of shake it. Yeah Sometimes I like it, but then sometimes we're like, no, no No No Bad bad bad You don't really jiggle that much though No, because I'm kind of hard dude, but the older I get only going to get softer, baby

I'm 30 dude. My metabolism is Checked out the bouncy the bouncy, uh Yeah, you're not really bouncy. No, see I think the bouncy is worse Yeah, I could also twerk that ass too. So like we saw that on instagram So I could bounce a little bit if I want to yeah if I want to in the right places, you know We were like you said we were talking a little before about like the James Corden bill marthang Uh, so apparently like bill marr like fat shame people. Yeah, he said that we need to bring fat shaming back It needs to make a comeback. I thought that was funny. I mean, I thought it was funny because it was just ridiculous

Yeah, yeah, like for someone to just be like uh fat shame we have to be like I forgot what his quote was I'm paraphrasing, but he was just like, you know, people say that fat shaming is bad and then we've done away with uh Done away with it. Yeah, uh, but it needs to make a comeback. I was like Yeah, but then like James Corden like responded to it and like was like, you know like sup. I'm fat. Sup. I'm fat British. Yeah successful. Yeah. Yeah. I love James corn, by the way. Yeah, and like, you know like A part of me Felt like there wasn't really kind of a wrong argument on either side No, I don't either because I think that would build well bill marr said was wrong. I don't agree with what he said

Like fat shaming needs to come back like that that's wrong. Yeah, like I get what he's trying to say I think he was just fitting this character of like I'm an asshole. He was he's a fucking asshole So he has to play an asshole on tv. So he made it more ass holy But or maybe he believes that and whatever. I don't fucking know bill bill marr and I'm not defending him by any means I don't give a shit. Uh, but in my opinion uh What I think he was referring to was how now when anyone's overweight Like you can't tell someone like oh dude, you're getting a little like, you know, whatever because they're like, oh, no

I'm comfortable with my skin. I'm beautiful. Like everyone's beautiful and like there's tons of different body shapes and like Yeah, of course. Like I agree with all of that and I think that everyone should be comfortable in their own body um But at the same time Shouldn't ignore the fact that like well, it is unhealthy that you're overweight. Yeah, and tons of people are overweight I think by the book i'm overweight too. Yeah, do I think i'm fat? No, I don't I think that I could get there like In record time if I really want it to yeah, you can be fat. You have fat hips. I have yeah, I do right Yeah, you have fat hips. I have fat hips and I got thick legs kind of you have thick legs not enough fat hips

You have wide hips Yeah, so I can really stack this fucking frame because you don't have like love handles that'd be different You have like wide hips that you like. Yeah, you could you could store something there. Yeah Dude, i'm telling you right now. Trust me. I know. Yeah, I could fit a whole bunch of baggage in here You know and then like also coming from someone who is fat uh technically scientifically fat Um, you called yourself fat boy before that was so funny. I mean I just called you know what I'm saying fat boy is one of the funniest Remarks ever by the way. Yeah. Yeah in my like I just think it's so fat boy. Oh my god. My brother calls me that all the time Yeah, I think

You know and it's like I understand where like James Corden's coming from like there's like fat shaming and shit like this That is so dumb though like fat shaming like the actual act of sorry for cutting you up Yeah, the actual thing of like yeah, but I'm sorry The actual part of like shaming like that's where I'm like I don't agree with this guy because like I don't Because he's like it should make a comeback because and he thinks that if shaming comes back Then that'll have a positive effect

But if you walk through this door every day and I was like, dude, you're so fat Like that wouldn't motivate you to be like, you know, I'm gonna lose this weight It would just make you like an angry person. Yeah, I probably come in here and fucking shoot you one day That's what I'm saying or and it would it would just make you feel bad about yourself It wouldn't make you feel like Out you want to better yourself. It's just that you would just like start to like Eventually hate yourself because you're getting like these bad reactions. Well, yeah, that is stupid. Yeah, like, you know like listen I've embraced fat culture in a way. You know what I'm saying culture. Yeah, but you know, uh

But you know You know and I know that like my health isn't isn't the best Like I had to make major adjustments to like change my health overall So like and a lot of it had to do with weight now the one thing I'm gonna say is and I and I hope I don't hurt anybody's feelings like this but like I think everybody needs a friend That can say that to them though one time. Yeah to be like, hey man like listen like you're fucking fat, dude You're putting it on. Yeah, and like and there's a nice way to say that. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just saying it like it

You know because I have the fucking Vocabulary of a six-year-old right, but you know, I think that people need to be a little more realistic with like, you know You don't have to look like Brad Pitt Right, but like yo if your blood pressure is good and like you're fucking blood counts looking okay and uh, you know your liver enzymes are good and You know your blood sugar is good and your heart ejection rates. All right, and you have I'm just gonna keep going Yeah, and then you have all you know, these things are these these things are well on you That's fine. That's fine. So like for me is like

me personally Like losing weight is gonna lower my numbers like yeah across the board Right, but like right now just like my numbers are the best they've ever been And it's just been just from making healthy choices. Like I don't care like dude Like I'm about to get married and shit and have a kid like at some point. I'm she's not pregnant But like at some point it's like, yo, like I don't have a heart attack when I'm fucking 58 years old That's what I'm saying. And you know what I mean, and I think that is like the Sort of problem there is when people are like because I'm totally behind being comfortable in your skin

You know what I mean, but There is a time where You can be comfortable in your skin But also you have to also keep in mind the rest of your life. Yeah, because you're only 30 years old. Thank you Uh, thanks for riding me if you were to not address your weight and not make healthy decisions and just tell yourself And I'm not saying this is everyone who says this shit But like if you're like, no, I'm you know, big is beautiful and and like If if that was your thought and again

I because I have to preface a thousand times so fucking people understand Yeah, I'm not saying this is everyone nor am I saying that chamber that is yeah That if someone's fat, they're they're not beautiful or fucking whatever. That's not what I'm saying Uh, I love I love thick mama sedas. We've been on record. Yeah, please thick mama's all day. I love thick moms But But if you if you like have that Kind of belief at 25 Yeah, right and you're a bigger person

You're like, you know what I am cross my own skin And I'm just gonna like whatever not even gonna worry about blah blah blah like that That's cool when you're 25 because your body is still like Yeah, you can lose 30 pounds in like four days But when you get to 35 40 45 and you haven't changed your your eating habits and you and you just Are been putting on weight It's like yo, you're it's gonna take a toll on you and like your arteries are gonna like you're being you're being nice about 35 Once you start hitting like 28 29 30 you notice your body starts to change in terms of how it breaks down food. Yeah, and

like At the end of the day, I don't give a fuck what you look like like to me it has nothing to do With your body shape No, it just so happens that the science behind it is if You're bigger and you have obvious body fat in your body You are unhealthy and at a higher risk for all these diseases that could kill you Yeah, I mean listen if that was the case where you could just look however you wanted and everyone your arteries are perfect Your fucking blood pressure cholesterol all these things are totally fine. I don't dude

Cool. Yeah, just people look great if in any body type You know, they could be super skinny or they could be a thick ass mama like you know I'm saying look at me I get I get mad chicks in my mind And then but and then like so it's not about how you physically look no because people look it's about how you physically feel It's about being Healthy. Yeah, you know dude like I over ate so I gave myself a disease That's crazy. You know what I'm saying like that's when you know, you have something has to change and like we do hide behind like yo mad thick

Or like I'm a unit You know what I'm saying Like you know like we do that and it's funny, but like I think as males though. It's way easier for us to like Joke around get away with that with each other I feel like all right, you know what I mean because it's it's it's Because even if it did hurt someone's feelings on like a whole on a wide spectrum, you know what I mean Yeah, like if your friends call you fat piece of shit enough You're gonna take it home with you. Yeah, that's fucked up. You know what I mean

Like it's like oh look who's fat fuck first time it's hilarious But like a hundred times it's like damn. Do my friends even like me? Yeah, like damn Maybe they'll like like myself. Yeah, and then it's like damn like like are they gonna look at me like this Are they gonna look at me like that and then like I feel like on the female side Just speaking from what I think sorry if this is wrong It calling a girl fat and calling a guy fat are drastically different I think in terms of the way it's receptive Received received is receptive reception. I don't know man. I like receptive. Let's roll with it

Let's let's roll with it So I think the only difference is that in the way that it is the dude receptive. Thank you. Thank you A dude will just kind of like internalize that and just like not say like even if they were like super offended Like wouldn't say a word like stab his pillow at home. Yeah, exactly like plot your murder But I think um Yeah, man, like I said like do I think that everyone needs to be skinny? No, I don't do I think that I'm Where I want to be as far as weight. No, no, uh, I don't think anybody is that's what I'm saying Like there's a very select few people and now we should have more access to seeing them because of instagram and social media

And shit, but that's not what normal people look like and I am by no means saying that everyone needs to lose weight and needs to But all I am saying is we need to start making healthy choices when you get up there in age And I think when you start looking at like numbers like yo, I weigh this much or this much Is where you get kind of lost in that. Yeah, I think you should just worry about getting healthy Yeah, and then the weight stuff will come will come after that right because you know what I mean You can make healthy choices You think you're making healthy choices, but you don't really put a lot of research into it and you're eating shit That's harmful right and then you know like

If you just look I feel like if you just look like I was 280. I'm 250 something now, but like If you look at it as I'm just gonna get healthy The all that other shit's gonna fall into place. Yeah, you know what I'm saying and I'm still trying to get there Yeah, and I don't I don't think that there's anyone who I mean I could be wrong, but I think that If you lost 30 pounds you wouldn't be like, oh man I'd be hype. I know like I'm just saying like I'm just saying yeah, I guess starting the NFL right now Probably can't start in the NFL. That probably makes a fit three-man roster. I mean they put you on the practice squad

That's fine. I mean, yeah, it's let me hold a water bottle. Maybe yeah The first down markers is um But yeah, I think that you know on both sides of that like I'm with James Corden and like shaming does absolutely nothing I'm all about like the progression of this idea I think that all of it is like It is like cool like the You know being comfortable in your body and like big as beautiful and shit because absolutely I mean, there's fucking bigger girls are hot as shit. Yeah, and you're like, yes, you're physically appealing. There's big dudes that are hot too, so

Come on um So I'm all for all that I but I do think that if it's just that Then but we also can't ignore, you know, I mean people have a really bad way of having the counter argument of being like You fucking fat pieces of shit are gonna die. Yeah. Yeah, and it's it's there has to be a middle ground Where it's like, yeah, I'm comfortable on my own skin But I also am like trying to make healthy choices and like just because I'm gonna lose some weight

Doesn't mean that I wasn't comfortable in my skin. Like I'm still gonna lose it and I'm still like I'm comfortable now Like me like like for instance me right now I mean stupid coming from me because people are looking at me like yeah You don't understand because I've never been like super overweight. Joe has body dysmorphia guys. I don't have body dysmorphia But what what I'm saying is like I hate me What I'm saying is like I'm I by no means think I'm like fat or that I'm like whatever am I wherever I want to be? No, I'm not so it's like Fat boy

So with me, it's like I'm comfortable in my own skin That doesn't mean that I don't want to lose weight and get into better shape No, I feel you because then that's the other counter the counterpart is just like Oh, well if if big is beautiful then why are you losing weight because I want to be healthy A dumb fucking asshole, but a party wants to be fucking like, you know a little get some abs pop and get those little fucking things Oh my god, those side like trail maps Yeah V you want the v trailing down that cock and then you have that one power vein that runs up from your puberage

Like kind of up to your belly button, you know how many like movies. Have you seen I see a lot? Yeah, clearly. No, but like me like I'll probably never Have a six pack But I don't care about that. Yeah, it's not it's not about that, you know what I'm saying I just want to make sure like I just want to make sure my dick works and like my butthole doesn't collapse when I'm like 42 that's all, you know, I just want my dick and my butt my heart That's all I want. Yeah front back and in middle. I want my dick my butt

And my fucking heart. Yeah, is that that much to ask for? He didn't ask for brain because that was out the window years ago Let me let me tell you something they're gonna take my brain when I'm done And I'm gonna I'm actually gonna donate my brain to science Yeah, and they're gonna take you and they're gonna take it and be like this guy played football drove NASCAR uh Base base base jumped and they'd be like now this dude just like slept a lot

They'd be like, this is the worst case of cta I've ever seen they're gonna take your brain And they're immediately just gonna throw it in the trash. You can be like this one is Oh This is a rotten one. Yeah, you ever get like a bag of apples and there's that one that has like a brown Like it looks like it's shit. It's pants. Yeah, I'm throwing this one out That's good Let's get to the ads like an apple shit. It's pants. Yeah, but no Yeah, yeah, no, we'll get to the ads but like

Shame culture it's like I'm not for shame. I'm not for shame. I'm all about I'm I'm I'm a constructive criticism Yes, because I'm I'm open to criticism. I'm I'm I'm open to hearing people like Telling me when I'm wrong. Yeah, and like having a reason for that But in a way that's not combative. So it's It's helpful But me just telling you your fat is me not offering anything But if but if I'm someone who's just like yo, you're

You know, we should I'll help you out. Yeah, like I'll help you out Like we'll do something like we'll do it together even or like we'll try to you know I mean like that's that's more helpful than just being like bro. You're getting disgusting But and it's also like somebody knows like your secret, but it's not a secret It's like because inside you're like you're telling yourself that and then like being able to share it with somebody Yeah, it helps a lot knowing that they're not going to come back like fucking fat pieces shit. Yeah Stuff yeah, so it's it's about just like having the conversation and just being like because being delusional on either ends Is not like when there's people who are just like just don't be fat. It's like it's not that easy

I don't understand like how hard it is like just don't eat that fucking pop tart Yeah, just don't have 10 slices of pizza and you'll be fine Yeah, I might do you know how hard that is for me Not only that but it's like if I just stop eating pizza like there's a So many other bad habits that I probably had I mean everyone has bad eating had John Goggins would fucking obliterate us right now Oh my god, John Goggins would just be like you're infecting the youth. I just ran 400 miles this morning I feel he's gonna drop to the fucking ceiling if we can talk

Yeah, it probably climbed the side of the building and be like I fucking trained get out here. You fat piece of shit No You probably call me obese. Yeah Guys like negative 2.5 percent Is a freak It's just like I just know how hot I am like I'm okay

I just know how fucking hot I am like I don't care what anybody says It's just it's just my my swag is stupid You know, it's crazy When you really think about and then we'll get to this when you were saying that right? Yeah. Yeah, you're like, I know how hot I am technically Everyone is really hot when you think about it. All right, you're gonna have to break this down for me because because I like where you're going, but I want to see how this ends because no matter what You are someone's like

Dude, oh, come on. Don't do that to me. I'm a type now Everybody you idiot. All right me whatever It's like, oh, this is this is my like you're the hot. You're really fucking hot to somebody. Yeah, that's right So I'm saying so everyone technical. Oh, I thought you was like trying to spin it like like Oh, no, that's not Like I'm a fat person's type. No, I was just like, all right I'm saying everybody like if you see somebody and you're like, I don't really find them attractive

It's like that's cool because someone is like fuck, dude. That person's hot as shit. So technically we're all fucking hot as fuck When you look at the world that way and you know, we're all just like hot pieces of ass walking around. It's a lot better Yeah You don't got to be hot for me, but you're hot for someone on this earth. That's all that's all I care is about That's what I'm saying, man What the fuck is this hot? We are all obsessed with like wanting everyone to think we're hot for what? I don't know That's weird. It is weird. I don't want to be hot to everyone. It's like I want everyone to think I'm hot No, I feel like that would be weird

Just being like, yo, everyone thinks you're hot. I'd be like That'd be annoying. It makes me feel better when people are like, I don't say it You ever see going you know what I love doing? I love when I go to bars finding like the objectively Hotest girl in there and just watching dudes right just approach But you know, I'm thinking about how awful her night is right now. Yeah, and now imagine Like we all want to be the hottest person in the room Imagine being you have to be that person the whole time. I mean, it's tough. It's tough for you, isn't it? Yeah, it's rough But like, you know

I've gotten pretty good at it. Yeah, you're all right fighting them off. All right It's like an episode of the walking dead That's keep them off me climbing over fences All right, let's get to the sponsors we have today. First one we have is stamps.com. Shout out to stamps.com man Brings all the amazing services of the us postal office write to your computer You can use your computer to print any us postage 24 7 So you don't gotta like, you know 3am you trying to send out some mail

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Sexy yeah, man getting a little too crazy. Yo, if you're a grown man and don't have a duvet cover worried about you Yeah, you need to get something on that get a duvet cover get something on your buffy. I don't know how to spell duvet I'm pretty sure it's duvet Like dovet. I I spelled duvet like cartier Wait, well, how did you spell it do you vi er? Cartier duvet. I'm pretty sure it's duvet. Yeah, I'm right You know, I am right because I just had to get a new duvet duvet Uh, not your best. Not my best. I mean, listen, you know what I mean? I sometimes you're not always your best

I'm willing to try. I'm willing to put myself out there Try some material. You know what I'm saying new material. Yeah, you gotta work it out with the crowd. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's crowd work. That's really mostly what it is. I understand. You know, uh, listen Speaking of duvets and blankets. I was gonna say speaking of duvets and blankets I texted Danny a couple days ago and I was like, I just had the funniest fucking dream ever And you're not gonna believe it Uh, and I'm gonna tell her the basement yard So I'm gonna do that now because usually like I woke up like fast

And immediately knew how funny that was and I started writing it down. Yeah And this is what I wrote and unfortunately it wasn't were you like half asleep when you were right? I wasn't I was up for the day Which this would have been a lot funnier if I was half asleep because the notes would be funny Uh Okay, good. Yeah, so I have it. It's like whatever. I'm not I'm not gonna make up anything. I didn't write All right. Um, so anyway Because I had that Buffy. I had a good night's sleep. So the boy was dreaming

You know because when I when I have a good night's sleep I got some crazy shit that happens to me, but this one in particular. So, um My landlord Downstairs, uh, my landlord came into my apartment With with a big box All right, okay, I don't know how he got into my apartment, but we were in here. We were right here and uh I just know your reaction to what I said, okay So he comes in he's got a big box. It's like all taped up. He's like, oh, Joe wait till you see this thing

Like well, all right, so he's all excited about it. I'm like, you know, I'm I'm into it So I'm like, yeah, let's let's pop open this box. What's in it like an animal or some shit, you know um, so he opens a box He opens the box and um, all this shit isn't here by the way. Like that's just a wall um And it's a laundry basket, but it's plated in gold And it has like this blue diamond looking thing like in the bottom, but it's still one of those laundry baskets That's like wavy. Yeah. Like it's like plastic, but you can like move it around you like you go. Yeah

Form it. Yeah, you can form it to fit anywhere. Yes, you know what I'm saying Uh, so and gold is plated gold, right? So he's like, look at that He's all excited about this thing and I'm like, oh man, is that gold? And he's like, yeah So then and you know guys if you knew my uh landlord, that's exactly how you say, oh, Joe nice. Yeah, it's nice So then here's where it takes a turn. All right laundry basket already weird, but then He takes a different laundry basket not plated in gold Just your run of the mill right bed bath and beyond fucking plastic plastic blue garbage. Yeah, you're training bra laundry basket

He puts it on his head Right, so he takes this thing. Okay, like hey, you know how you would carry it like this you put the laundry in it Yeah, he's it and he puts it on his head. Okay. He's got he's got a helmet now Now he's got a helmet, but it has like the holes in it. So I could still see the man. He's like a knight Basically, yeah, yeah, basically essentially right because you know how those laundry bags have they got hold. Yeah. Yeah, of course So it's it's the same exact one as the other one except this one's plated in gold. Okay So he puts the other one on his head. Okay, and I could see is there and then he leans against the wall So then he leans against the wall

And then I'm sorry. I know Josely. I love so I'm picturing him doing this right now Like this no, no, no I don't know why He puts it on his head and then he just leans against the wall like this. So like it's like there And then he just goes He goes Hit me with a basket

He wanted me to pick up the gold. Oh the heavy one and hit him With this basket while he wore the other basket. Oh my god. Did you do it? I hit him three times I hit this man like bang And that was the whole dream There was no follow-up. He didn't say anything. It was just over. What the fuck manifested that I don't know What I wrote down verbatim was you got to tell him that No, no, no, I can't

He takes a different laundry basket and puts it on his head and leans against the wall And then asks me to hit him with the gold plated laundry basket while he's wearing another laundry basket on his head and then it's just There's I hit return and then I wrote so I did dot dot three times Damn, and then you just woke up after you struck him three times Yeah, I hit this man with a gold plated basket while he was wearing a basket And then I just woke up man and it was fucking strange And I know there's people out there that are trying to decipher this but all I gotta say is gl to that good luck

I think like I feel like that could happen though in real life Like not with him not with him specifically, but it's like yo, I got this new thing Hit me with it You know, what the fuck are you talking about? Like if I like if I got something cool in the mail It's you when you sneakers like put like a helmet on be like hit me with if you got a helmet that was Yeah, yeah, yeah, when you get a football helmet you start slapping your head. I think he kind of had a helmet on I mean, he didn't though. He had a laundry basket on his head. Joe come here. Let me talk. Let me show you something

Joe come here. Oh, you gotta see this thing Hit me with it Now I can't see him anymore now every time I see I won't get a picture of fucking Got your basket on his head god forbid that guy like ever walk and around with a laundry basket If he yeah If you like for a second like lifts a laundry basket over his head in the hallway I'm gonna just lose my mind. Oh, I'm just gonna start hitting them with A gold and I love how I had one blue diamond in the bottom like yeah, it was sort of Egyptian

It was sort of Egyptian looking that's fire though. Yeah, it was kind of want one now I kind of want one too. Yeah But yeah, I beat the shit out of him with this thing man. I swung it. I didn't I didn't really hold back either I was swinging for the fences, man I was like very bomb but his little ass was he was he smiling at all or was he like dead pants like hit me with it Uh, he didn't say it excited. I don't know what he was what he looked like while I was doing it Because it was sort of like an outer body like I was watching myself Yeah, and he was hitting in the basket. Anyway, it's hard to tell. Yeah. I was hitting him in the basket

Yeah, yeah, so I wasn't hitting him in the stomach like I was hitting the basket Yeah, you know, I knew he wanted basket on basket kind of violence there. So I gave it to him But you know, I just it was crazy, man. If a dude sucks your penis in a dream, are you gay? Uh I don't what like wait You What what man I'm just saying like if any man like sucks your pain like in the middle in the middle of a dream

is that me like Are you gonna tell someone about it? I mean, I probably yeah, probably like yeah, I probably wake up and be like, yo I'm not telling anybody I got sucked. That's how homophobic people are. So yeah, I'm not even telling anybody a guy sucked me in a dream Have you had a dream where a man sucked probably I don't know I think you remember that um No, but I've had gay dreams Like what like like I've made out with dudes Really? Yeah, have you actually yeah, dude

I know that thing about it. I maybe have done that every dude has had a Has had gay dreams, dude. I actually don't know I've never got sucked by a dude, but I've made out with dudes I've never really had like a like a sucked dream Like getting sucked by like a male or female or just a male just like any sort of suck Yeah, no, I've never got sucked by a dude I did have a dream once where I got sucked and my dick turned into a microphone or method man was wrapping into it after I

You had a dream that you were getting sucked upon Yeah by a female and then my penis turned into a microphone and method man was wrapping and then all of a sudden I was sitting in the crowd watching method man wrap with your dick It was like one of those pictures. It's like here's this now zoom out and here's what's really going on and now zoom out again Wait, so where the microphone was in our mouth? Not no, it might it was my penis. I'm aware. So my penis was my penis And then I looked around and then I looked down and it was a microphone or method man was wrapping

Also, the girl disappeared. She disappeared with your dick with my cock So she ran away with this dick and just flew off and then I was I'm immediately sitting in a chair like how I'm sitting now method man. It's just like, yeah Like rapping. I'm like, yo, this is fire. But that's my dick dude. M. E. T. H. O. D. Man. Yo, this might smell like a dick I'm like, yeah But no, yeah, I've had dreams. I made out with dudes cares No, I mean, I mean in short, I don't think that makes you gay But I uh

I can't say I have a whole lot of experience and with that to be honest. You've never had a dream with a dude No, damn dude You banged guys. I've never banged a butt. You know, my sex dreams are awful Like I never fucking come and like my dick's always a fucking limp nude Like I never thrash Yeah in dreams like trying to get my penis in is like trying to like throw a punch Yeah, can't punch. No, you can't punch. Like I wish I had one dream where I'm like absolutely pounding I'm just gonna say to all the men out there who've had dreams about making out with a dude

I'm with you on that, right? I've been there. Yeah. Yeah, I've had multiple dude make out dreams Dude, I just like touched my face and now I smell like a cinnamon Something cinnamon. No, maybe a shower and shit. Maybe touch a candle I mean, I don't I'm not gonna look me in the eyes right now and tell me you never kissed a man in a dream I don't think I have to be honest with you I'm trying to remember. I'm trying to unlock some some stories here for you. I really want to be you don't Forget those dreams. That's true. I kind of wish I got sucked in a dream though

By a dude. Yeah, why not cares So treated I feel would you I don't know what I feel gay after it. No, no, no, no, I'm not saying that I'm saying would you actually be able to feel what it's like? Of course you would dream I don't really feel stuff in my dreams But I don't really feel anything in my dreams Like even when I'm like when you know, you have that that thing where you like falling you wake up real quick or like when you Oh, you feel that for sure

I don't I just I feel my body jolting in the morning But I don't feel anything within the dream like if I fall down like I don't really feel anything If I get punched I don't feel that I know but you ever have those dreams you wake up from you're like You're like, what the fuck was that? Like you're mad scared like frantic I was actually I think I woke myself up laughing not too long ago. See that's that's weird than getting your dick suck by dude I was just like looking around like yo the fuck was so funny. That's strange dream. Yeah, that's a strange one But like uh, you ever try to text somebody?

While like sleeping still Oh, yeah, and it's like fly black. I bet See you laugh. Yeah, I've done that You know what I've done too. I've been I've been Texting when my phone's plugged in and I'll fall asleep with it in my hand And then it'll fall out of my hand and hit the floor and scare the shit out of me. Yeah, that would scare me too Literally the shit. I've shit my bed Really? No

What's up, has charlie shit in my bed? Yeah, no, no even as a puppy. I mean as a puppy you can't get up there But yeah, he likes never shit our bed. He peed our bed once. Yeah, I think my dog's pissed on my bed mad times Yeah, I was like excitement. I'm like, oh you want to go for a walk and he's like you're in I'm like, well, I don't need to go now. Yeah. Um, but anyway, so I you know staying on the topic of dreams I found this article the uh, nine common dreams and what they're supposed to mean what they supposedly Supposedly what am I saying supposedly mean supposedly I would accept as a judge Do you believe in like they mean shit or you just having dreams? I think you're just having dreams. I also think you're just having dreams

Like I think they're related to things that you're probably thinking about that are on your mind subconsciously throughout the day I'm thinking about making out with dudes No, I think if I joke about making out with dudes, you're thinking about making out with dudes So you're thinking about it, right? Making out with dudes could be on your gay shit could be on your mind. You know gay shit stays on my mind, dog I know I maybe made gay jokes all the time around here. There's a lot of gay comedy here Like I've sucked your dick in in joke form like maybe 50 times Or I've like offered to do it for like the dumbest things like yo, if you go down and get the food right now, I'll suck your dick. Yeah

No one's ever paid up, but Despite what people think I think people think we're dating. It's fine. I think I'm alana I'm getting engaged soon. Yeah, this like girl that I'm with It's like always doing like podcasts with me So nine common dreams and what they supposedly mean. I'm gonna guess what they mean. I don't know. Okay, cool. Okay, uh I don't know if these are in order, but anyway, here we go. First one dreams about falling Uh, um You're not fulfilled

In your personal life So you feel like you don't have a grasp on reality So you're falling and you're like, oh my god As a human even though i'm not physically falling. I'm falling down this shaft of darkness I think i'm right. I couldn't even follow that. Yeah, you could. Yeah. Well, you're not you're not deep Uh dreams about falling from great heights are very common while there is a popular myth that if you hit the ground in your dream

You will die in real life. It is simply not true That's another thing that people said like, yo, you know, whoever dies in your dreams like die in real life I'm like, I really don't have that power. I've died in mad dreams. Yeah, I feel like I've gotten shot in dreams before um According to many popular dream interpretations falling dreams are a sign That something in your life isn't going well. It might suggest that you need to rethink a choice or consider a new direction in some area in your life Guess who's right? Danny with the shaft. It is a symbol of fear in real life. Perhaps a feeling at work or in your love life

Uh falling author expresses a need to let yourself go more and enjoy life more I would say I was right. You I say we were right. Yeah, I said you had a unorthodox way of explaining Of course, but that's who I am. I am unorthodox You've just been making up words this whole time. Uh second dreams about being naked in public Uh, you're afraid you have like social, um In congruities First of all, I've never had this dream ever I I've had this dream but not to this effect where I'm like Oh, so like I was walking by

But I've had dreams right But I've had dreams where I've just been naked But like in public. Yeah, I haven't yeah, I've never had like I've had dreams I'm in like a Duane reed or like a Walgreens or something naked. I mean just you're just yeah Like no one really gave me a hard time. They were just like, yeah naked guy. Yeah naked guy But uh, I would say it is New York. So yeah, yeah So like I would say would have to do with like you're afraid of like a presentation or like having so like, uh In social environments or having second thoughts. Okay, socially awkward

Uh, penny pierce after after author of dream dictionary for dummies. Oh penny pierce. Yes, of course, of course penny pierce Uh suggests that dreaming of public nudity might indicate that you feel a phony Oh, you feel like a phony or that you are afraid of revealing your imperfections and shortcomings. I was wrong Yeah, that one's more of like you're insecure. I guess. Yeah Interesting, uh dreams about being chased. I've had dreams like that. Yeah, I think dogs Michael Myers like demon dogs. Yeah, like dogs that like you could see their ribs because it's open But they're alive. I had a dream once that Michael Myers caught me once and then he

grabbed my leg he flipped me on my back and stabbed me in my chest like in my sternum and went like this And opened my shit up I lived. Oh, yeah, I could see that. Yeah, but that was the scariest chase dream I ever had Also can't climb stairs You ever try to run upstairs in a dream? I don't know. It's Impossible running as hard. I feel like why can't I go? Yeah, it's the worst and trying to run upstairs. I'm like, uh, like a stupid puppy

I can't get up any fucking stairs. Yeah, but he ripped my whole shit out And then he had said and then I sucked his dick That part didn't happen. Yeah, the stabbing part didn't happen dick sucking it Oh, okay. Yeah, he sucked Michael Myers Uh, Tony crisp. What are these fucking names? I don't know. These all sound like pokemon trainers. It sounds like some dude I used to buy a fucking coke from Tony crisp. Yo, Tony. Chris. What do you got with me, baby? uh But yeah, he uh suggests that being chased in a dream might indicate a desire to escape from your own fears or desires

Or i'm just scared of these dogs Yo, but maybe if i'm kissing dudes and i'm running away in the dream Maybe i'm running away because maybe I really want to kiss dudes That could be it, man Oh, i'm sorry My sexuality uh crossroads bores you I guess so man Actually, I think i'm starting to get tired. I might have to have a dream soon Next losing teeth this one. I hate

You're thinking about death Or it's like you're losing power That's like everyone's answer like every girl who like tries to Interpret your dreams like uh, I mean you're losing power. I was like, what power do I have look like i'm losing power Yeah, what does that mean? I'm losing power like like i'm a pharaoh What power? I'm just a guy just walking around, you know what i'm saying like with power you do look a little less on power these days What you look a little less little less powerful. I'm not as powerful. Yeah

I'm getting a haircut on wednesday. You want to see power? There we go now now there's some power coming back Okay, penny pierce she's back at it suggest streaming about you didn't say with that teeth thing I'm doing it penny pierce. I'm sorry. I thought it was tony crisp. No tony crisp was the last one Oh, tony tony crisp the desired chev whatever the fuck it was at least $30 for you in the mailbox. Yeah, uh Penny pierce she suggests she said there's multiple meetings. There could be Um, it might mean that you are worried about your attractiveness or appearance It might also indicate that you are concerned about your ability to communicate or concerned that you might have said something embarrassing My teeth are falling out tonight

Why because of my dreams that i've talked about. Yeah, you're embarrassed. No, dude I'll suck somebody in my dream tonight. I don't give a fuck to complete. I thought you were the one getting sucked I don't care. I'll suck somebody in my dream. I don't give a fuck man. I'm mad open my dream sexuality I'm fucking back curious in my dreams I'll suck. I'll fuck. I'll get fucked. I care, bro It's a fucking dream, dude. You're gonna have to crush this dream boy Dude, you're gonna have to crush this thick daddy in there for me to even remember you Yeah, you're gonna. I'm gonna forget. They say you you forget most of your dreams like 10 minutes after you have

Yeah, if you remember a gay dream that guy gave it to you. That's what i'm saying if I remember Fuck me right. Yeah, I might be just getting gay fucked like like That's what i'm crazy. Yo, you've probably been gay fucked mad tons, but they gave me trash dick So I don't even remember. I'll tell you about my guys Yeah, let me know. Yeah. Yeah. I'll transfer. Yeah, try to try to Can I just rub our heads together? Yeah. Yeah, we're fucking head but each other and pass out together Can I ask you this? Yeah, would you ever uh, have you seen uh eternal sunshine and spotless mind? Uh, yeah with uh, I I don't remember at all. I saw it like years ago

Okay, so it's like uh, it's jim carrey and kate winsel. It's a very good movie. I recommend you watch it again. Yeah, um It's about a guy and a couple uh a guy and his girlfriend. Um Kate winselet has her memory deleted first Of him Okay, they have this technology where you could get rid of memories and then jim carries story of him deleting her from her memories From his memories is the plot of the movie. That's what you say And he has to relive all the dreams and all like all the good times

That they had together Would you ever erase anything from your mind if you could? I don't think so like if you had the technology to be like, you know, I like I want to like get rid of this and i'm not saying like something like, you know, horribly traumatic because obviously We don't want that that you wouldn't want to have that but i'm just saying like stuff like you don't want to think about I guess there would be very mundane things. Yeah like I couldn't give you an example but I guess it would have to be traumatic for you like actually like

Really want it to be gone if you want me to get all like super serious right now Like I don't think getting rid of a traumatic memory Does you any good? I think that traumatic memories Some of them make you a better person. Yeah, and they like help you in a way, you know It's still traumatic and you bring it with you everywhere But it's like it does make you either a stronger person or like whatever it helps you like get to a certain point You're like, but I think that like for me. It would just be like mundane shit Because I would never want to forget something like important even if it's the person I hate the most

They teach you stuff right about like someone who's like portrayed you or like whatever they teach you Yeah, like it was a fun Benedict Arnold Fucking game of thrones up here But I think I would get rid of mundane shit too. Like it would just be like, oh man. I just I don't know Yeah Like like you get like a 150 dollar ticket and you pay it and you're like, let me just forget about this Like I would want to think about like dumb shit. I've done though like Breaking windows as a kid or something like sometimes I think about moments like that and I'm like

Yeah, but see that's what the good it does It's a fucking asshole But that's the good it does because if you never did those things you would probably think it was a good idea right now Imagine if you just saw me outside just throwing rocks at windows 30 year old man change my blocks. That's for sure as a Awesome rocks Um, be at the losing teeth thing. I actually have that but I don't they don't fall out I like they burst out of my mouth because I'm smiling so hard

And that maybe because I sometimes I grind my teeth in my sleep. Just cry. Who the fucking joker like I'm like this And then like some from break. No, mine fall out Yeah, it's weird. I'm insecure when you wake up from that dream and notice your teeth are there and you're like Yeah, all the time about to just go brush every tooth For four minutes, but it says like you're worried about your attractiveness or appearance I that I'm insecure about my teeth. So that could be why I have that dream too Yeah, it could be that one that one works for me Um dreams about dying dreams about dying is you're thinking about dying or you're thinking about losing someone

Popular dream interpretations suggests that such dreams reflect anxiety about change or fear of the unknown. That's literally like My whole life. Yeah, I never really have these dreams though I've had dreams where I die. I had dreams where I've been on my fucking death bed before Yeah, I've had that too. You've had death bed dreams. I think so and like people have like come to be like I'm like I'm the godfather. They bring like frankincense and mur like put their hand like on Yeah, you always touch a sick person's face like with the back of your hand a little bit because it's kind of gross and you're like I don't want this. It's like oh my child Fucking they give you this fucking side swipe of your face. I will say right because in like romantic situations, too

There's this what this is not Comforting yeah, but it's sexy though. It's not yo If a dude in my dream whoever fucks me tonight Rubs my rubs his hand on my face like this. I'm nothing dude. I don't I don't believe in that This is stupid. How do you rub face? I just I go I get right here I I hold on to your fucking the back of your skull. You know what I'm saying? So it's like you don't know if I'm about to Choke the life out of you or like put you to bed. Sometimes I kiss Alana while she's sleeping

Like on her forehead. Oh, that's yeah, you know what I'm saying. Can't be mouth kissing. No. No. No. Is that is that weird to do that? No, not on the forehead. That's cute. Is it? Yeah, but I mean you can't be kissing like the slumbered on the mouth That's a little crazy Kissing her open mouth Yeah, that's strange man I just feel like people are so vulnerable and they're asleep. So like smooch him's kind of kind of tough Tough and like no not not in like a cool new york way like Yeah, that shit is tough. No, no, no, no, no. Yo kissing bitches when they're asleep. Yo, that shit is tough

That shit is tough. No, this is tough. No, it's like it's a little weird. All right Dreams about taking a test literally never Not once I've had dreams where I've taken tests but like not to the point where it's like Any tests I've ever taken in a dream like hasn't been an important or integral part of the dream. It's just like it was a setting Yeah, I don't I don't get this but uh craig hamilton parker. Oh chp Jesus christmas

To dream of failing an exam being late for one or being unprepared shows that you feel unprepared for challenges of waking life Whoa, that's a fucking great analysis chp. Thanks ch. I could have fucking guessed that drunk on my stoop Uh dreams about infidelity okay I can guess this this probably means that like You're unfulfilled in the bedroom or some shit I'll be back. I think I got my swagger bag. Oh Oh

Yeah, far game back, baby. Damn. I smell that immediately dude. No, that's not me. That's your garbage No, I think it hit a hallway jet stream because that shit is in my in my brain right now No No, man, I'm tasting it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah What do you think? I think you changed your diet for sure. Yeah More fiber. Yeah, it's not very sweet Shit hurt carry on but yeah infidelity is probably you're not fulfilled in the bedroom or like with your partner and shit

You'd be thinking about like I'm not getting sucked the way I want to get sucked. Not me Uh, yeah, I mean, I mean this one just shorty ain't sucking me right My I've been hugging the block That's right I'll be having these dreams where I'd be cheating this because like So it's just not she ain't sucking me. You know what I'm saying? She ain't sucking me, right? Yeah, man, people talk like that around here That that's like a conversation I've heard on the one train. Maybe

5,000 you ever have one of like the ghetto like people like in your neighborhood who are like older than you and you're like 17 Years old and they try to offer you life advice and they say shit like, you know the way to get a girl to like do what you Want you just got a fucking Shit on her, you know, I'm saying like dude this guy gives worse at the worst But you have to sit there and be like, yo, I feel you man I'm a dude you're 27 and you're hanging out in a park with a 17 year old boy And you just gotta be like, yo, no pussy I've never seen you with one bitch and then he's like, yo

No, well, let me tell you something about these girls, right? They want you to like they want you to hit them They want you to like like throw sand in their face Want you to throw sand Oh Spend all over me. Yeah, man. Go to a girl's house. Go up to a girl's house And when she when she's sucking you you cut a fraught in the face All right establish dominance on that ass, right and right when you about to come just Bop on the top of the head not eat the teller, but just be like i'm coming

You know i'm saying they just love that shit. They love and like, yo, honestly, this is the worst advice We've ever been given in my life. I don't know carl I'm gonna try it. Yeah, but if you're wrong I'm gonna be in trouble my boss at one of my old jobs not at elite daily Uh, I was working at a pizzeria at the time. He like calls me up. He's like, yo, come here. Come here. What's up? And he goes You ever cut a font in a girl's face while she's sucking you off and I was like Dude, I gotta go like on a delivery right now. Yeah, because there's like dudes that are joking about like sex stuff But then there's dudes that are dead ass like yo, you ever just like

Want to fucking choke a bitch and you're like, yo, nah, I'm like, yo, I'm like, I don't know It's like what do you mean though? Like what do you mean? Like like like sexually choke or like nah, but like just like know what i'm saying I'm like, no, not right now. It's like, yo, you ever like paddle a bitch? Yeah, like, whoa, give it just like want a missile drop kick a bitch from the top of your bed. You have a horror kim rana Yeah You have a spine busting your bitch You ever give your girls a wall to jericho or something?

The boston crab I'm not a wrestler, but I put a bitch in a boston crab I can't even have sex like that. Yeah, I don't think you can Um, but yeah, it's like issues with trust loyalty and communication dreams about flying Well, fuck I want to be like You want to like gain powers? Like like you want to like become better No, like you want to achieve your dreams. No, it's uh

A desire to flee or escape from the realities of life Although flying in dreams you ever heard about like lucid dreaming And apparently you have like complete control of your body within a dream when you become aware that you are in a dream Yeah, of course, it's happened to me mad times. I've never had that you've never had that No, I know i'm dreaming did I want to go to one of those sensory deprivation tanks and just like you won't make it You won't make it Because it's mad like dude, you just spit right on my mouth. I watched it. I watched it go Yeah, man

But you know Yo, I hear people freak out in there That's fine What does that mean like are you claustrophobic? No, you're gonna get scared then Because i'm not claustrophobic. No, I just want you to be scared I know you so badly wanted me to say yes to that that you just ignored my answer and kept going Spit on me. No, but I threw me awful. Anyone who's claustrophobic. Yeah, I I totally get that But like you have to go into it like knowing like you're about to be in a small space very dark and you're floating

in You know, I know what they are joe Yeah, I think it would be cool. So a dream from there sound gotta see us I bet you I would have some good fucking gay sex dream on that. I jerk. I jerk off in that tank Okay, why wouldn't you why wouldn't you floating like a baby? You're not gonna jerk off Listen, I was trying to get a freebie out of this. We talked about it some company like oh, we got tanks now They know and you're just in the water. I could get I could talk us into any tank in new york You could talk us into any I could talk us into any tank

You just said on the line on the show that you're gonna jerk off into their fucking salted water. Oh, I won't I won't add more salt to your salted water Disgusting guys freak guys gonna be floating around like a baby for an hour or not You're gonna think about touching his dick and I'm gonna think about it, but then I'm gonna go I'm in a public place. It's not public in there. Yes, it is Puppy people are popping in and I ever man people would probably jerk off at the gym sick freaks Yeah, oh, oh, this is another one of the things you do. I'd never Once I look like I go to the gym. That's true. Okay, that's true

But you could go there just to jerk off. No, I go there to shower and hide My responsibilities. That's my dream. I have dreams of going to the gym And they're awful nightmares Tell you what the last one dreams about pregnancy I have this one all the time that you're pregnant. No, I have dreams that Alana's pregnant all the time Not all the time, but I've had them multiple that makes sense though because you're getting to that point eventually Yeah, but they're all scary though because it's like it's never like hey, we're trying to get pregnant

It's like an alien baby. She's like you have to sit down You have to sit down. Yeah, you have to sit down. Yeah, and I'm like, okay, then she'll be like Listen, I am pregnant. And then like for some reason like she immediately becomes like Eight months pregnant off the bat off the bat. Yeah, and I'm like, how did I not notice this for eight months? Yeah, and then she's like, okay And we're gonna get to this thing in there And then she cries and then she just waddles off. Why because she's pregnant. Yeah, but like pregnant bitches be waddling Waddling. Yeah, she was yeah, they do walk like penguins. And then she's like you need to help me. I'm like, no

Like get away from me. I said maybe maybe I'm scared of having a kid Yeah, I think everyone does I'm just scared of people waddling towards me. Yeah, I don't like that I've seen that Batman movie with the penguin too many times. Yeah, he's a scary bastard see like That makes sense though because that has to be on your mind. Yeah, that's what I was gonna say probably. Um, but what do they I believe that pregnancy dreams might sometimes represent a woman's fear of being an inadequate mother So this makes a lot of sense. So what you're saying would be inadequate father. Yeah, man I'd say that like sam for mine sam. Yeah, I don't know

I saw that movie recently at one o'clock in the morning And when I tell you your boy was crying Yeah, I am sam. Have you ever seen I am sam? Yeah Dude Gotcha, it got you. Holy shit. Yeah. Hey, man. Come watch this movie. It's fucking sad as shit You know what movie's mad sad? Oh, man. What's that holocaust movie with the kids? Oh the boy and the striped pajamas, bro And they're talking through the fence and shit You know what other movies mad sad life is beautiful that italian movie never seen it dude

If you can tonight watch that movie. Oh, it's super sad. You ever see marley and me? Yeah, dude Okay, I was gonna say don't no, I've seen marley and me. Oh damn and you had a you had a retreat. Yeah, uh lab Yeah, and then he died Yeah, but I wouldn't if I had that dog. I would never watch that movie. Yeah But the thing about that fucking movie too is like they knew I hate when they know what they're doing You know what I mean? It's like, yo, we're gonna fuck you Yeah, we want we want you to leave here and tear and that movie didn't even end well Yeah, no, I didn't terribly

But it's real it's real Remember my dog skip skip fucking dies too dog. We want to hear something about my dog skip. Frankie munez Yo, come on the show dog. Yo, Frankie munez. How the hell do you look 17 still? Yeah, aren't you like a race car driver now? Come on the show kid come on the show bro Because let me tell I got a bone to pick with you when I was in like third grade I was trying to impress a bunch of bitches, right? So I was like, yo, we're all going to the movies We're gonna see my dog skip new movie out Frankie munez the guy was popping off at the time Yeah, kajie cody banks in a building that's what I'm saying. Nickelodeon and shit whatever the fuck he was on

Malcolm in the middle welcome in the middle with bryan cranson. That was a big ass show So he we go and now we got grave diggers hitting puppies with a fucking shovel the boys crying at his own Own birthday crying on my own birthday here And like a lot of people are looking at me like, yo, this boy's a bitch so backfired on me So I gotta go yo, Frankie munez Why would you accept a role like that because they would have never made that movie if you're popping off ass wasn't in it Yeah, it would have just went under the radar is one of those indie movies that wins a grammy and no one fucking Like what is that? Yeah, you know it would be one of those movies, but he was in it

So I saw it it was in you know mainstream theater And then I was crying in front of all these girls. I was trying to impress I would have thought that got you mad cheeks though. No cheeks just crying. What age do you think it gets like? Cute to cry ask you a question and answer this seriously. Yeah, do you think girls like dating guys with like emotional problems What are our emotional problems like? Like mental health issues and like maybe like substance abuse issues you're asking the wrong guy Wait substance abuse issues. You think they like signing up for like alcoholics. No, no, no

I'm just saying like do you think or some girls are drawn to that? I think that subconsciously sometimes maybe they want to save you not Women in particular, but I think that anybody. Yeah are drawn to I was just saying because you were talking about that No, I know I'm not trying to make you am I putting you on island. Yo women stop dating Stupid dudes. No, I think in general some people are drawn to people who feel like Someone could see potential is like, oh, you know what I could help them get the next step and then they'd be totally fine And it's like in a way that's like a project. I don't think people sign up for

Crackheads though. Yeah, and then it's like a weekend. He's like smoking meth on the roof And like he thinks he could fly I may have I may have made the wrong decision. I may have made this wrong My boyfriend's on the roof Talking he does that. He'd leave him. He does that stuff. I always wondered that I guess it's an upbringing thing, but like I don't know Emotional problems. Are you saying because I cried you thought girls would find that cute? Yeah, I thought like girls Like he's mad sensitive almost suck that sensitive dick. No in third grade in third grade It's always like how can we figure out how to make fun of the other sex? Oh, you want to hear something weird

Yeah, but you were inviting them to birthday parties. You were ahead of the game. I mean Yeah, would you first kiss a girl? I kiss a girl third grade. Oh, I was mad young You scared I was kissing them times Yeah, I wasn't in third grade. I don't think I'm fucking sure. Yeah, relax. It's getting gross now Hope you're in a time machine think I'm thicker than this thing You ever compare your penis to like inanimate objects, I don't boy listen I want to just I wanted to say this because I'll forget it. Yeah, that's right This is 100 true. You can ask Frankie. Okay in like fourth and fifth grade

at recess at the school right over here We played this game with the girls. It was guys versus girls. Good name It wasn't called that it was just those were the teams right and The object of the game To like it was basically tag But in order to tag the other person you had to Pin the girls up against the wall Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah. Did I tell you this? Yeah

Very queens Very would not last in this day and age and it was very like if I'm a parent looking at that from afar and be like These kids got some stuff. They're gonna be like that's gonna come out later in their life Thankfully, we're all very normal people But it was just a game we played they would pin us up against the wall And then it would be like oh, you're you have to stay there now But you had to pin them. Damn. Did you ever get a boner? No, I would because it wasn't sexual at all I would have got one just had a fear

No, yeah, you're always talking about fear boners. Yeah, dude. You think they're not real. They're fucking real, dude Wouldn't it be really funny if they were super real? And that was a way to kind of measure how scared you were to the point where in scary movies People are just bonered. Yeah in scenes where it's like, you know, what's going on downstairs and they had boners You're like, yo, this guy's fucking afraid Also the other thing I think we've talked about it on here though Like in movies when like dude just coming girls and they're like okay with it Sex in movies is so dumb. It's just like

And it's like you're actually gonna like address this huge load. I dumped down there. Yeah Might want to clean that up. So I love when movies Do address it And she like gets up. Yeah, and I'm like, yes, that's real. No one snuggles right after a cp Yeah Clean that thing up the cream popsicle cream poppy Yeah, I uh I whenever like when we had that conversation and then when you watch sex scenes after that

It's just like funny because the dude's like not moving. He's just like Oh I would love to get some torque in those hips there, johnny if I was an actor I would get hard constantly I mean, you know during a sex scene there's no way. I'm not getting a boner. I would have to duct tape dude if I'm like All right, you need to hump her for a while. Dude. I'm getting a boner. I'm sorry. Yeah professional or not. I'm getting hard You can't fight blood. No If I'm humping somebody I'm gonna get a boner. I'm pumping a wall. I'm gonna get a boner I could press my body up against that wall right now

And eventually I'd get hard. Yeah, you get a tingling you get the tingly dick feeling. You know that if I press my dick up against that Yeah, eventually my dick would just be like there's a there's an outside Like something it's touching us stimulant right now. Yeah, and now I'm excited. Yeah I wouldn't ever get hard enough to fight the wall off though. Like my dick would just stay on. No. No. No. Yeah. Yeah, you're yeah That's exactly exactly sometimes. Yeah I just had a moment where I stepped outside of the show and I'm listening to us talking Yeah, it'd be like that it'd be like that sometimes it'd be like that sometimes. Amen I got I got nothing I got nothing for you. No, I mean we like sexually or do you mean like right now? I mean

You mean in this realm or in your dream realm because I might have some stuff for you tonight Yeah, I might have subconsciously sucked you. I don't know That would make all this a little weirder, bro. If I sucked you in a dream I would 100 tell you because it would be hilarious. Yeah. Yes. Like I there would be no hiding. I almost hope it happens Yo, I wonder if like, you know a friend of mine had a dream he walked down an alley and I was getting ass raped Yeah, I'm serious. I'm serious. I'm serious my friend my friend Ben Yeah, he said he he said he turned down an alleyway and I was and I was in an alley just getting fucked Yeah, I swear to god. I don't I don't mean to laugh. No, I swear on all that's holy

That that is a true story. I'm not saying that for comedic effect here He had a dream that I was just getting fucking fucked but like rape though Did he help you? No Left you. Yeah, so I deciphered that can't trust them Can't trust them You'll meet him at the wedding You'll meet him at the wedding and you and you ask him about that the Danny in the alley dream Yeah, I'm gonna pull him to the side like it's a serious conversation. Let me let me

I'm gonna bring it up in my wedding. I'll be like, you know, tell me about that time. I got raped in that alley Yeah, yeah, let me ask you a question Why don't you save Danny that day? Why'd you let that guy keep fucking his butt? Damn, man. I'm sorry. Man. Yeah, it's all right. We're gonna get demonetized now. Oh, yeah I mean, you know forward the whole like This whole podcast has been

You know, I'm gonna request a manual review I always think about that because on youtube for people who don't know like if you upload something I'm sure they have like these like little triggers little guideline words So if that happens like if I put sex in a title, it'll just get like flagged But then you you can request a manual review and then someone will actually I'm assuming Someone will actually watch it and go through it and be like, okay. You know what? This is not what we thought it was It's more educational or it's whatever. Yeah, which this isn't but no, uh, we try to be sometimes I mean, we try but we don't you made up like five words this episode

Uh, don't exacerbate me. I always I always think about When I do request manual review Who's watching it and they're like, they're probably like, what the fuck is this thing? I wonder if they like laugh though and they're like, uh, man, I really don't want to demonetize this, but I got it I really think about like our eight situations like that. I really think our podcast is so like Unique like the conversations we have. Yeah to the point where I'm not even completely sure if this works on a very large scale

Like I don't know if like millions of people would be like, yeah No, I'll be honest with you. I think that's where our personalities come in like us is like our own like Entity, I didn't make that word up. Yeah, but like If net like if we were on netflix Like we'd be a popular show on there for sure. You think so? Yeah, of course Oh, man, I think it would be a polarizing but either people would be like, oh, this is so funny or they'd be like, this is the dumbest fucking Yeah, but it would be like one of those things that like you ever see tim and eric that show. No watch tim and eric Oh, well you watched um, uh

The fuck yeah guys there's motorcycles Oh tim robinson, uh tim robinson's show. Um Not everybody watches that Yeah, but I thought it was funny. I thought it was funny Like it's okay to be like you could be a niche these days, which is cool Like you could be a cult classic before like Needing that time to be a classic. I would love a cult I would love to have like someone here's like a super fan. He's like, yeah, I'll just do the dishes

I would love I would love to be like fight club. Just have a bunch of people that are just like I'm just gonna like forget about my family His name is robert paulson in death We have a name. I just realized that guy's from fucking mind hunter Oh the blonde hair guy. No, that's a Jared leto I don't know what to say. I was like talking about the guy who's like in death. We have a name His name was robert paulson. That's the guy from mind hunter

The cop not the skinny one the other oh, that's him. Yeah, damn. I haven't seen fight club in a while It is it is I've been fucked like that since grade school I haven't been fucked like that since grade school, but uh, wait, what were you just saying before that? Ah, man, I don't know. I forgot but like you want to know it's like listen like are we everyone's cup of tea? Yeah Yeah, dude. Love that tea, you know, and it's like, you know, I look at it like this Everybody's cup of caffeine Caffeine and uh, and and if you don't like us, you know

Suck us in our dreams suck my dreams. So I'm saying you know what I'm saying suck my dreams tonight Suck my dreams tonight Oh I don't know where to go But I know I'm gonna suck my dreams tonight. Oh, yeah I mean, that's that's that's all that's all where can they find you at Danny little priori Um on twitter and instagram and then maybe in some like creepy barton out of my dreams like twin peaks like come on

Just fucking rail me This is the gayest I've ever been on a show by the way And I'm all for it. Yeah Oh god, um, you guys I'll also go check out the other podcast on santa gata studios Um, the stink with dan and frank. I forgot the stink with dan and frank And other people's lives as well. Um, we're coming back. I believe september 28th Uh with our episode. I'm really excited about the season. We have a lot of cool episodes lined up. You said rada rada. We said a rod A rod

But yeah, go check those out other people's lives and the stink podcast and Our patreon shout out to our patrons patreon.com slash the base meard We appreciate you guys if you want to sign up for the patreon go to patreon.com slash the base meard You get every episode a week early and some bonus content some q&a shit blah blah blah and uh, yeah, that is all Yeah, see you guys next time Oh