The Basement Yard - #232 - Dying In The Shower

Episode Date: March 9, 2020

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Guys go check out our patreon where you can get our daily morning show and next week's episode today Good morning everyone. Welcome back to the basement yard Danny. How are you and your? face doing Danny doesn't have a beard no he shaved the beard it was an accident It's an actually dent. It's an accident. What'd you do? I was trying to fix this part because it was a little too long It was getting bushy and scraggly and then why are you talking like a one-year-old because I feel like one your hands are also Very toddler-ish

But it was it was it was straggly and I was trying to clean it up But then when I was cleaning up I went too far and then when I went too far it was gone What actually happened say it like a like an angry Republican all I know is Well, I want to shave my face. I took a little bit too much off and I said man I don't really know what's going on here. I came out of shower. I had no hair on my face Pissed me off shave in the shower. No, man. I did it before in the sink. Okay stare myself in the face By the way, this is the first day I've ever had creamer I've been this is my first time being creamed is what I'm trying to say cream it up

I got creamed this morning. I put a French vanilla creamer in my coffee my god. It tastes good There's a lot of chemicals in there that will ride out your asshole I don't doubt that and that's why I'm like, you know, I probably shouldn't don't get addicted to the cream cream No, I don't I'm not addicted to the creamer. You know, yeah, I mean I have heard of people getting addicted to cream before Not this cream. No. Yeah. Yeah. I know what cream you're talking about I'm talking about, you know whip cream Yeah, yeah, man-made. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Um, but nice come reference. Yeah Yo, you know, it's dope pussy. Yeah

Pussy dude Farther back today cuz you always feel like I'm always over this shit like didn't I mean you do you record episodes of this thing and you're like Haha, I like you're a young GZ That was a weird reference. How dare you? I'm sorry. Sorry. I apologize. I don't mind me. Apologize. Did I just say apologize? Apologin Yeah Anyway Today I wanted to do a little exercise, but before we got to that am I ugly?

What am I ugly now? I look better with a beard. You look better with a beard. I look so much better with a beard I mean, maybe not some people like a clean shaven Puerto Rican man. Yeah Some people would like that. Ah, it's not my type. I like a rugged man. Yeah, no, so it's scary What's scary? Oh, no, I feel mad vulnerable now. You are I can see more of you. Yeah But you get to you get to tan your face, that's true, you know, that's true So you don't get to you know, that's great But that would have had a nice shaven face for your birthday trip to Vermont that you didn't invite me It's not a birthday trip. What's your birthday tomorrow tomorrow?

Yes, and it's your birthday and it's the weekend of your birth and a weekend on the weekend of your birth means It's your birthday weekend you son of a bitch. No this past weekend if anything would have been my You didn't you're not changing age during that week that week is is irrelevant. I don't know if that's how that works Oh, yes, I think it's the it's the weekend that's closer to your birth is the one that you celebrate. No, no No, no, no, no, it's your birthday week You're turning 20 year snowboard. Yeah, I could ski a little bit. I can't snowboard though Yeah, I can get up on some skis go down some hills. I'm being honest I'm a little afraid because of my knee. Yeah, just pop in and out. Are you snowboarding or are you skiing?

I haven't decided do snowboard take a lesson. I Feel like that's harder to do it is harder to do. I don't want to just be on my ass the whole day No, but You and then you told me you told me about it yesterday would she did it I thought I did I sat right here with you and we did some little late-night work Make sure everything came out on time Why are you so offended because I just thought I was in in what thought I was in the sirk You're in the sirk. I thought I was in the sirk. You're in the sirk. I want to be

You gotta finish Like that Yeah, he's good hell yeah, he's gonna be big one day. I think y'all and John's gonna be the next big star I think so too. I know music Yeah, I could have been an A&R. Don't deflect this birthday shit. Yeah, it wasn't a birthday thing Okay, but it is but we're gonna keep going. It's not why are you going? Why would you say like that? We're just going because you know someone like wanted to go I'm too brown to go. Is that what it is?

Puerto Rican people don't ski. No, you know, you know what it was. It's like I was gonna invite you and you shade Those you weird Did one part of you think about asking me to go. No, I didn't god damn it. I didn't ask anyone to go. Okay Who planned this? Geo and Pete Geo and Pete Geo and Pete I'll remember when my rankings come out. I'll remember this nice. Yep. Yeah, do that out Greg's out There's two open spots. Why is Greg out? Oh because I don't know all Greg is this insider article that he just forgets about the basement yard Then he put you in but he did but it was after the fact and I had to throw a fussy fuss about it

Do what you do which I deserve to be in that article. Yeah, I deserve to be in there I do and then a part of me felt like this guy's going over my head Greg yeah, go over my head go over my head Greg. This is new name Wow over my head Greg over my head Greg Wow, I love Greg after I got him an amazing gift that he said his wife was so happy that I got for them. Oh, yeah, what plates or something. It was the specific Silverware silverware that she wanted nobody got it and I got it. I got two of them. I think First for inviting me to his wedding, which was fantastic. Mm-hmm You know what I'm saying yeah, Geo was bubble Geo was bubble five

Well, he was bubbling he was bubbling why like he was deaf honorable manch last year last last month Wait when we got back from Nashville he didn't make the rankings. No because he What do you do I Don't know he might have made it actually. Yeah, he might have I think Geo made it. Yeah, but oh They're out Pete's out Pete's definitely out Pete's out. You don't text me and ask me if I want to go to Vermont And you're in the neighborhood now. I live here. Yeah, Danny lives here now Yeah, I moved to Queens Danes a Queens boy now. Yeah, let me tell you something though. Yeah, definitely a different type of lifestyle over here

What does that mean like you want to dial the back a little bit? I'm been I'm trying to be more money conscious Yeah, so like you know like apartments nice to bedroom apartment. It's nice got space Five-minute walk to work now gonna save a whole lot of money on fucking cars I'm gonna miss the doorman What's wrong with that? What's wrong with what wait? Why do you why are you gonna miss the doorman cuz it was just cool to have a little phone But I do have a buzzer now. I still have a buzzer. Yeah, but like I'm just gonna miss like hey What's up, man? Postmates is here and I'm like all right, send them up

Now you get to just cut that out he rings your bell you hit the button He shows up at your door and now I'm the bell that rings in my apartment goes Yes Yes, that's your doorbell Yeah, why it's like a classical fucking dungeon you got there. Yeah, it's a little it's a little scary at night when it goes off Yeah, why does it go off at night? Oh? Gotcha, but yeah, I have an arrow mattress waiting on a mattress, right? So you're just sleeping on an air mattress. Yeah, so it's kind of like a like a you're like a POW over there

I'm definitely hiding. Yeah, I'm in hiding. Yes for sure But it's nice me and the dog over there just chilling live life, bro That's cute. Yeah, it's nice to be able to walk to work for sure. By the way the other day I pulled up to It was like scary, but it was also funny at the same time I Went to the store to get wine for my mom and I pull up in front of the store and there's a guy and he's going like this He's like looking up and pointing and getting my attention and I'm like What is he pointing at and I'm like looking and there's like a light pulse like a couple cars over because it's in a parking lot And I'm like, is he talking about the light pulse like is it gonna fall? Yeah

So I didn't know how it was so I parked my car and I get out I'm like, what's up? And he goes you see that star and he's pointing to the North Star and I'm like, yeah, and he goes It's falling We're all gonna die And then he walks away For what reason and left me to die with my life seemingly about to be over Just walked away and did he look the part and by the part of the homeless is ever fucking shit

It'll get to that. Okay, so then I'm like First of all, I was like what and then I look and I'm like, wait, is it are we going down? Is this I don't want to die, you know without drinking this entire bottle of wine But the guy was like walking away I was just kind of like what the fuck so then I get to like the curb and right before I walk in I turn around and the guy's looking for his car. It's like, where's my car his car right here Literally could have touched it. This man owned a car. The car was running door was open and the front Mashed right and he was looking for his car and he was walking in the opposite way. You know what this sounds like

Somebody was smoking some grass someone was messed up someone was smoking some meth he met or some cracky crack Yeah, there was some methodology. Yes. Yes. Yes. I told that story to my dad My dad goes no, I'm telling you some people some people that some people know and I go dad The guy who's met With his car run and not knowing where it is pointing to the North Star that's been there since fucking the caveman. I Think it's not falling. Yeah. Also. I don't think Say also stars are explosions. Aren't they? Aren't stars explode like exploding planet explosions in the sky

That's a great band. Yeah. No, but is it aren't stars just like exploding planets or something like that? Yes I'm fucking yes, and it's you know, and then like they exploded a while ago, but we're still seeing it Does it make a sound when they shoot is like see What are you talking about like a shooting star? He's like, yeah, I think No One more Remember how pumped up you got you just Yeah, but they wouldn't make sounds no, but I feel like up there. Do they make sounds? Oh like in spots

Maybe or maybe they don't is there sound in space? Whoa? I don't think so. I Don't think there's sound in space. You're right. You're right. I didn't hear any sounds in Armageddon Actually when they were on the planet the whole movie I said, no, I mean like in space when they showed like the space You know Would you ride a meteor to save the earth? Ride it. Yeah, like Bruce Willis. Oh like get up there and fuck if you think I'm getting in a rocket ship You fucked up All right, I'm spitting because of how stupid that was doesn't he eat like animal crackers off a bitch

Ben Affleckie scoop-doop-doop. Yeah, he's like, oh it goes to the little titty mountain and then he eats this animal crackers Which is dope. I would eat animal crackers off a bitch I would dip an animal cracker in some titties just like Ben Affleck in that movie food in the bedroom What kind of food anything see I don't know how I feel about crumb stuff because of the crumbs they get everywhere Yeah, and then I'm laying on crumbs. Yeah, I wake up I got fucking a giraffe print on my back because of these animal crackers Ben Affleck Yeah, you have a whipped cream your dong No, I've I have licked whipped cream off of things off a dog

Man, no, but no it sucked a whipped cream teddy. Yeah fire. Yeah, it's cool. Yeah But also at the same time I was kind of like I could do without this cream. Yeah, but just it's fun It's a little fun. I mean I think I just feel like it's cliche like unless I really want to do it Then I don't really feel like what about edible panties see the edible panty stuff I've never done, but I can't imagine unless it tastes like a fruit roll-up which in case which in that case I kind of be distracted by the Sweet treat here and not the actual one. They do They taste like you you've had edible panties. Yeah, did you and you just ate it? Mm-hmm. I can't imagine it works really well

To eat eat a panty. Yeah, it's I mean it seems pretty that's a lot of fruit roll Yeah, is it a G string so is it dug in that ass? Uh-huh? Not great You can't just eat a G string ass. Yeah, you can Panty what if you eat but though? Doesn't matter. Yeah, but it's different because that's like you're flossing an asshole and then eating it You know what a floss You know if you go down there. It's just like what are you flossing dude? Yeah, that's true. You're kicking up dirt

You know what I'm saying definitely kicking up some dust Yeah, that's like when you see like a scuba diver walking on the bottom of the ocean. It's like this dude's kicking up fucking up Yeah, it's coming up all over the place You know he's unveiling like treasure and like an octopus that was like hiding and like you know I'm saying they camouflaged their skin and Like you you can't do that so like that's what I'm saying You got a little floss going in that but I don't know about that I'd be more inclined to eat an edible panty that was like a granny panty because not only is it like you know on the Outside just touching the stuff. It's a lot of calories. It's a lot of calories. Yeah

It's a big roll up, but I like a fruit roll up for sure over a fruit by the foot. Yeah so Remember like trying to punch the shit out of fruit roll ups and then it was like what are we doing here? Let's just roll this up into a ball and shove it in thy face I used to do that and Frankie would get mad at me, but you know what Frank used to do? He used to take a fruit roll up And then stick his tongue through it go And just go like that that's one of the most Frankie things I could think of yeah

Yeah, and he probably was like look it's a pussy and I was like I don't even know what that is dude We were mad. Yeah, what's a pussy bro? It's a pussy. I never know what a pussy is really anymore. When did you when did we learn pussy? You know because like I don't even remember when I've learned about vaginas Well, it was like girls were cute, but it was it stopped at the face Yeah, all she has a really cute face I want to kiss it Yeah, and then and then it was like I kind of want to hug this girl and that was or just no It was I want to hold this girl's cute. I don't want to touch her though

Because ew, but then you're like I'll hold her hand though. Yeah, and then you're like damn I'll hug a bitch And like let the titties touch me and then you're like now I'll touch a tit though Pussy is the last thing that you think about The last it goes from the final boss It is the final boss of what you like I want to touch your pussy now Yeah, you're like, I think I'm ready now to do this like it's like some big fucking Like thing it's weird. It just starts with the face. Oh, that's cute. I don't want to touch it hands

Hands like oh, I want to hold your hand like in first grade like I'll hold this girl's hand Yeah, and then you started hugging girls a little kissies on the cheeks Oh kiss on the cheek was huge in like seventh grade. I used to you know when hot girls would kiss you on the cheek Like sending to the moon dog. Yeah, dude. I was fucking first of all. I had to skip next period Yeah, sit in the bathroom away from my boner to disappear for sure. You know what I mean? Sure You want to know it's weird how guys we don't have like terms of endearment like sweetie And cutie What are you talking about? You know like

If you go out to dinner, right? Yeah, and like a dude's just like whatever like a nice like, uh Like a waiter or whatever like, uh, what do you want sweetheart? I go say it to the girl. Oh, but he won't give us no Well buddies one buddy boss chief. Yeah, but buddy boss chief Yeah, but I want ones that fucking make me feel cute too. You want an eye at the end of them. Yeah, I want a little Chiefy. What's that? Yeah, bossy. What's up bossy? I'm like Stop what specials do you have? You know, let me get the flasso. I want I want some too. I want one or two We don't get we don't get much as men. Well, I think we're more just like uh chief I am a boss. I want I want steak. Give me the sticky eggs. Yeah, raw

And then kiss me. Yeah, you know strongly That was yeah Grabbing her face and kissing the shit out of it. Oh, I love that come on Just giving it just grabbing a girl's head and then you're being like Bah, and then you just want to pop it like a bit like a beach ball. Yeah, like I don't even know Just be like, yeah Yeah, I know I got to go in the run. Yeah, now I gotta run. I killed a person I kissed her too hard. Now she's dead. Yeah. Yeah

But you did invite me to your birthday We got back to that. Yeah, you tried to go go go dancing skedittles around that that trip was just whatever I honestly forgot it was my birthday. Who is going? uh Gio out Eric Out and he begged me. Yo, he begged me at dom's wedding. He's like, yo, how do I get into this wedding? I mean, uh, how do I get into this top five?

As well. How do I do it? So fucking out. Um I hope they all fucking hear this and no too that they're fucking out josh. No, he's not going He's about to lose it. Um, um Pete Pete out uh I think that's all you know marco marco. Yes fucking out Yeah, and then that's all you know and then the other ones are like gio's other friends people that I was in utah with

That you don't know. Okay Yeah, and greg's out Yeah, great just out. I guess six people that are out. Wow. It's gonna be a shake-up this month. It's gonna be just franky dom Hey guys, yeah, Ralph josh everybody, you know put put your time in put your time in put your time in Yeah, Danny's in the neighborhood now. So yeah, man. I'm around so put the time in we'll see how this goes It's all right. You're gonna have fun skiing without me. Make sure to take some pictures and some videos. I want to see Okay You okay? Yeah

Long day for me stressful stressful day Thought we were best friends. That's wrong. I guess Hey, listen, listen, I know to be fair. I listen. I know I know I came along a little later. I understand that No, no, no. I don't mind playing from start this. I don't mind playing from behind a little bit But we got something special here. I just thought you know Look at this guy Listen

Here's the thing, right? Not a big weekend guy Oh, what where you? I love weekends. We don't really hang out that much on weekends. You tell me when to come. I will come Come right now come for you come for me Come for me sends me to the moon Right honestly someone could be holding my my mother's head and just cut it have it cut off It's decapitated holding it and I walk in go. What the? And he goes come for me. I'm like, well

God damn, I'm coming now My mom dude Oh Damn it. Will you say that man? I'll be right back, but I'm calling cops. Yeah, I'm calling cops as soon as I come I'll come back here Put my mom's head back on her body Yeah, that'd be crazy Um, what were you just talking about? I don't know about all that. I'm not a weekend person, man

No, we don't really hang out on the weekends. I want to hang out all the time But now it's different because you're right there. Yeah, so now oh, we're gonna play some baski ball We could have hung out yesterday yesterday All my troubles seem so far away Now I know Oh my god, what song is that? You just said that mad weird

You don't know the song yesterday by who by the fucking Beatles Sing it again yesterday. Do do do all my troubles seem so far away. Oh, yeah, I do know that song But I don't like Yeah, I do know the song but I don't know the words to it. Wow I'm sorry showing my age, you know, that's all right. My birthday's tomorrow. So maybe I'll know tomorrow. I'll be older It's gonna be 28 28 man, but I will say I feel like I've been 30 for a couple years From like 26 till now, I've felt nothing on my birthday. Don't take this as a personal attack doc Those gray hairs are coming in a little faster these days

Yeah, I mean Yeah, like you're not on devino level like devino's fucking shit is outrageous. Yeah, I got some grace My hair is also like the longest it's been in a while now. I like it I'm getting a haircut this week. Why because I don't really like it. Oh I like you an head not like you an anthoop Yeah um What happened?

No, nothing nothing at all Nothing nothing's happening. No Um, but you know, it is what it is. Uh, no, but I'm saying you're in the you're in the neighborhood now I'm in the neighborhood. So I know that, you know, I'm always around sometimes you go to trivia on Wednesdays We'll love to do that. It's an easy thing for you to do. You can leave right from here Yep, and then, you know, sometimes you play basketball. I'll shoot some hoops Shooty hoops. I posted a picture on my instagram of me on the break dawg. Also, we we have a contest now Okay, that's officially started. Okay

You're 215. I'm one under 175. I think right? Yeah, that's what we said So now we could go to the gym together if you want in the morning. Yes. I'm down. I'm going later too You gotta pick me up though Okay, I'm going today. I went this morning, but I'm gonna go and just run and if you want to just go and sign up I could do that and run or whatever. I don't have gym clothes with me though No, I mean you'd be you could go to your apartment. Oh, yeah. So we could do that gets walled up Yeah, it's walled up. Otherwise. I'm just gonna crush you. What's that? What was what were we playing for? It was nothing just a contest just dude trying to just reach peak

Performance. Yeah, I'm just gonna starve myself, man. Yeah, I've been fasting and it's been pretty bad I've had a handful of almonds in the last 18 hours. Yeah You don't want to eat after 8 30. You said right? Yeah. Yeah smart I've no but I've made uh Strides to change my diet finally. You know what it is. It's like You know what it is. I never really cared about gaining weight or anything like that, but then I'm like I can't you feel fat. No, I don't feel fat. I feel like I I'm not

skinny You know what I'm saying, which I don't care, but I'll tell you now get on it now. Well, that's the thing Slippery slope. That's the only reason why I'm like, all right I'm gonna nip this in the butt now and just because I'm like if I wait another year before I'm like, okay Now I'll make changes to my diet because I I don't I always tell myself like dude I could get into shape in three months like it's not a big deal Yeah, because I'm not that far away from what the I always just put it off in my head or whatever, but now now I'm gonna do it just because whatever

I'm going to Florida this weekend. Anyway, I don't want to go to your birthday party. That's fine Even though it's after the fact, but it's cool. Yeah You know what before we get into what we're gonna get into today. I'm gonna get to these ads I'm gonna get us paid. Get us paid. Get us paid. Here comes the payment The advertizers are coming. The advertizers are coming. You know who didn't offer to help me move to everybody You I offered to help you That is Joe, I love you so much. Yes, I do. I care about you so much

I would fucking suck a dick for you to just for you to like have a good day All right, but I want to have a good day tomorrow. I'll suck. I'll suck somebody's cock. It doesn't matter. Yeah, what I'm saying I drove by Joe In my van Okay, good. Okay. We had we actually had a very good talk. It was a very it was a very good talk We did and now at the end of that conversation. I said something ahead And I was like I got to go

Yeah And then Joe walked away in the socks. That's literally I was in my socks. That's a fact No, but I we have all right, but we had a long time No, I had all right, but we had a long all right We had a long talk and at the end of it. I said call me if you need anything That's wait I Can you help me decipher this? I'm not going at you right now

Yeah, people that say call me if you need anything Yeah, it's kind of an empty one though an empty one is like when someone passes away You know, I call me if you need anything like who's gonna call me like hey, man. Hey, what's up? My friend's dead Yeah, no like I need I need something No, but I meant like if you needed me to help but like and I also asked you previously before that a while ago If you needed help moving and you're like, I don't have like I just have clothes and shit I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah So if you had like a bed and like fucking all this shit, I was aggressive

Oh, man, if you had a bed I would have helped you. I would have grabbed that entire bed brother It threw it on my back dude and carried it all the way from new york city to a story of brother That's my bunch. I love you, dude if you I don't know why I said that like a witch I said that like Ursula, uh, but no, no, you did you did. Yeah, so so do other people. I'm just lying He's not

Nobody asked me. Okay. Let's get to these heads real quick. Get a bed get a bed And bash it over your head Light it on fire throw it in the street if it's in the trash Oh, fuck That's so funny If you had a bed, I'd set it on fire and I throw you in it and I watch you burn in there That's what I do for you It's like you had clothes and shit, but if you had a bed

I hate beds My biggest adversary is a bed. I would do anything to conquer your bed, daddy It's a different story All of this is contingent upon the fact of you having a bed all revolves around the bed Oh My god, man, my son is killing me Ah, dude, oh that hurt. Oh, look at the ads If there is the word bed in any of these I'm gonna die like

Okay Yo right below my roof cage is hurting so bad right now Oh, man, let's get kind of fucking WWE pro on a bed I was like, yeah, this is betting the fucking royal rumble that what's going on over here I've been waiting I've been waiting to get my hands on this bed Oh, motherfucker Okay, I'm gonna try and get through this You had to be there you had to be there

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Again, that is better help dot com slash yard. All right And that's what we have For today. Love our sponsors on the show. Love them I'm sorry to clear my throat. Love them. Let me clear my throat. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah. Um, so anyway today I actually got this idea from uh someone who DMs me. I'll actually I'm gonna get their name right It was this kid. He's like, yo, I had a worksheet in class and

He just said hey, joe. I'm a huge fan of your work and love listening to your podcast I was doing this worksheet today and couldn't help but imagine how funny it would be to hear you and dany rank How likely you think these events are on the basement yard? His name is andrew Uh, granel Okay, and drill and he sent me a thing. It's a basically a risk assessment test Okay, uh, and it says the following is a list of possible threats to human life Please number one to 20 with one being the most likely event and 20 being the least likely event Okay. All right. So I kind of copied it. I took a couple out and added my own. Oh

But yeah And I printed them out So I got a worksheet here. Oh come on Are you a finger liquor? Fuck no Does that help? No All right, Peyton Manning. I'm tanning on a worksheet. You know what I'm saying? Here. Oh, you want blue or black? Black goes my outfit Thank you. That was the right answer any other answer would have been racist. That's true

All right. I think we should just go through them. There's 20 Just checking. Oh, okay. He doesn't trust me Uh, all right, so I'm not going to your birthday party. So hold on. Hold on. What are you doing? You're filling it out. You one of these guys. Oh, I'm sorry. We have to go through. Okay Uh, mo which one is the most likely event? All right. So I don't this is going to be a toughie Because there's 20 but all right. So we're starting with injuries from fireworks now Have you ever been injured from a firework? Yeah

What kind little one Burn your hands. Yeah, blow up my hand. What blow up in your hand? Just a little like, you know, the ones that Firecracker, yeah, yeah firecracker firecracker But uh, uh, a firecracker in my hand and I went to throw it and the wick was too short and went Gotcha. So burn the tips of my fingers. I mean, josh got shot at uh, or like a mortar Like they do this show over here a bunch of like cops or whatever on Fourth of july and they put them in these like metal things and they shoot them in the air and it tipped over and it shot

Like at us and we're like, whoa We like got out of the way and then it fucking exploded like on the floor It was mad scary. Yeah, dude. Missed that on a bag. Yeah. Um, miss that on a bag We'll shoot the shit out of the police. Yeah, so I don't know that's kind of In the middle for me, I guess injury from shaving What's an injury from shaving cutting yourself? Is that an in like a yeah, am I injured? Did you put this one in because of my face? No, that was in there. It was on the worksheet That's not an injury though

So you it is my fucking pride. It is. Yeah, you ever cut your balls. Yeah, cut your dim. Yes You cut your dick off. Yeah. Yeah, I've cut my cock malt Yeah, malt You know what happened to me one time one time I was like I was shaving my shit because I was ready to go out and service a woman And uh, I cut myself and I was like, well now I'm staying home. Yeah, I can't have open wounds No, I don't like taking risks. No, you can't you can't not that she was you know, a promiscuous promiscuous woman

Yeah, no, it's just that's direct to the bloodstream. That's main vein and whatever she's got that's what I'm saying I can't be there and maybe I you know, I don't maybe she's not cool with me having a little bit of a spot of You know an open was it like at the base? It was base. Yeah, so you could well I'm not cutting the mid. I'm not I don't like the middle of my dick doesn't have hair No, but I'm saying I don't know because like sometimes they grow a little like on the sides They'll get long it was kind of what not it was kind of like where the ball hair definitely grows on the base of a penis Not the in the middle My yeah, I know take care of

Well, I'm saying like at the at the base. Yeah, there's some you know, right, right, right, but not in the middle No, like I'm not cutting, you know Your dick shouldn't have chest hair. Yeah. Yeah, it should just have you think people have like hairy chest hair Like all the way up there like that dick looks like a dog's dick Well, a dog's dick is in a in a sheath and it comes out to play and it looks like a fucking tongue. Yeah Dog dicks are so wack. I know dogs have the wackest dicks bulbous to bulbous. Yeah, what's that? It's like They hide a lot of cock in there. Oh, yeah They can pack it in there

But what I'm saying is like the outside just looks like a normal hairy whatever you got going on Yeah, but then it comes out and you're like, what is this slimy fucking lipstick thing? Like dogs have one of the wackest dicks I've ever seen and I've seen like Eight. Yeah, I've seen like at least seven species of cock. Yeah, I've seen whale dicks They're weird too. They just look like harpoons walrus cock. You ever seen that? No, you just spit on the tail Cock what walrus walruses have weird ones dude. They're fucking first of all, they're dried ganchoing. Yeah. Yeah and they're Like there's a bone

In their dick. Yeah, you could google the bone like if you want to look at uh, oh, I'm looking at walrus penis walrus penis bone I'm just gonna type in walrus magic and pennied by this thing walrus penis boner Dude, it looks like a femur. Yeah, what the fuck nothing will thrash Yo, shout out to all the female walruses taking that thing dude the washington post right the first thing I typed in walrus wal walrus penis the washington post

Male walruses have giant ones, but human men not at all How we lost the bone the penis bone Oh, we used to have a bone apparently and then someone fucking misplaced it and thanks. Thanks. Now. We have all saggy penises. Yeah We lost our tails and our cocks. This is fucked. It's trash Yeah, we lost our penises. Yeah, dude. What what does a walrus puss look like? Gotta look it up gotta look it up gotta look it up walrus vagina Yo, what the fuck um, is there pictures? Okay. Oh, yeah, not what I wanted to see. Oh, that's a mouth I was like damn, dude walrus has got teeth in their puss. That's crazy, but yo you can't yo come on

God damn, dude. That's not it. That's the mouth been around the bliz-knock right there. Yeah I mean these things are fucking weird, dude But yeah, they're not great. They just look like Oh, I think that was a birth Oh birth dude. It just looks like a wet basketball. All right. Let me see. Let me see. Let me see. Let me see I'll show you but I'm not gonna show anyone else. No, I don't know. Look look look watch. Hold on Dude, dude. Fuck you Yeah

Ready oh sick, dude. What the hell? Yeah Yo Buffalo suffering from vaginal pro Let me see the prolapse age Ah That literally looks like a walrus vagina coming out of a buffalo's vagina God, that was oh my god. That was a giant sepsia. It was like what it was like raining too. Yeah, why is it raining?

Why is it so why is it peeing? That's about animals give birth and they look like they're not even giving birth like a cow. Just be like And there's a hulk. There's a whole cow falling out. I'm the cow. Just like like yeah, I'm just giving birth whatever the fuck I'm gonna give you a shit I'm giving birth or whatever fucking cares. Do baby cows suck those tits. Yeah. Why do you think they have tits? It's cows fucking tits. I cannot believe I just asked that. That was so stupid. What do you think they're sucking you idiot? You fucking idiot No, but yeah, of course cows are sucking their mom's udders their mom's tips tips

How many udders they got for bow? Yeah, I love the sound of that water hitting that fucking sing. I love that When the fucking milk hits that fucking tin can a sing instinct instinct gratification. Yeah We gotta go milk a cow. Yeah, is that still legal? Yeah, of course. I don't know People they're not gonna like it. Yeah, whatever Um death by choking on food. You ever been close to the edge with the food? Yeah, mozzarella sticks Got stuck in there once Yeah, cheese will do that cheese will cheese will get you hot cheese

It just falls down your throat and makes like a saran wrap over your air and does not detach Yeah, it's tough. Um Have I choked on I choked on like a Fucking what's that called? I um, what's those a jawbreaker? Yeah choked on one of those ones Uh, stupid candy. Yeah a dumb candy Keith used to go some of them are like this big Keith used to go all the way to the movie theater because they had giant Giant jawbreakers there, right? like baseballs

And he'd take them home put them in a ziploc and then hit it with a hammer and then eat it with and they eat the pieces Crafty man But a lot of work We're talking about hammering. Yeah, and and a bike ride and a bike ride or a bus ride Or uh, I'm driving right. Yes, you know One of one of those. Um, oh my god. I just opened my phone and just a bunch of fucking walrus was yeah Let me get rid of this real quick. You did because I I can't have this Okay, that's gone. That's done. All right. Um injury from mowing the lawn. What?

And who's gotten injured mowing a lawn You cut your foot Yeah, if you put your foot underneath the mower That's okay. If you lay down and take a nap and like goes like on autopilot fatally slipping in the shower Fatally, yeah, maybe you hit your head knock out and drown dude You can't drown in the shower. Hell. Yeah, you can dude. You can drown in puddle Right, but that's a collection of water. Yeah shower. The water's just like yeah If it's like water boarding you though like if you fell on your head and just like

And like it's getting your face in your mouth you're gonna inhale that right? I don't know, right brother. I don't know I've never done it. I don't I'm not sure drowning in a bathtub. That makes sense. Yeah drowning in a bathtub makes sense You pass out you fucking whatever you go down Um transportation accident, okay car accidents or maybe getting hit by a car or getting hit by a train or truck or whatever struck by lightning not very common Not very common

Although they're a heart there have been people who Get struck by lightning and live That's awesome I think rick flair got hit by lightning Yeah, I think rick flair got struck by lightning and then he also survived two plane crashes What that's the goat right there he got struck by lightning. Yeah You know his birthday is on my birthday, right? His birthday is tomorrow. It's two goats two goats right there two goats having their I mean, I've never been struck by lightning

So there's that uh murdered. Okay I mean, it's realistic. I live in new york. Yeah, people get murdered. Um being the victim of a serious crime in your lifetime like murder Like murder or you know, what's a serious crime like a robbery rape uh Thars Yeah

arson I don't know Uh dating a supermodel Okay Uh getting hemorrhoids. Okay say that's pretty common You got it. You ever have a hammy? No, you've never had a hammy. I mean either not diagnosed one What does that mean you had a

Self diagnosed hemorrhoid. I feel like you got to like figure it out You what like like it wasn't never got to a point where I was like, yo, I need to get this checked out It might be a hemorrhoid But you were like, yo, I can't really sit down because my butt's screaming at me. I've never had that No, no, I've never had it either, but I know some people that had other stuff on my butt. That was bad Yeah, yeah Dating a millionaire Okay becoming a pro athlete not that common

becoming president Okay Meteor landing on your house Well, that's probably gonna be number one dying from being bitten by a venomous spider Which is one of my biggest fears and why I'm like terrified to walk in the jungle Not because of the cheetahs and the gorillas But because I might step on like a little Something and it you know, and then my foot falls off in 20 minutes. There's just venom coursing through your goddamn veins

Yeah, and my blood turns like Into orange or like acid syrup. Yeah, and then I die um developing cancer uh being attacked by a shark And then dying while rollerblading Okay, so off the bat. I would say the wait the least likely is 20 or 1 20 20 is the least likely

Yeah, so I would say 20 is meteor landing on your house for me. That's what I'm gonna say. I'm gonna say Becoming A pro athlete You think there's a better chance. Well, yeah, there's probably something I could become a pro athlete And that's like shit. Hey, but like wouldn't be real I also think you have a better chance of being in the NFL than a meteor landing on your house Out of all of the earths at a fucking surface didn't they say there's one coming

There's been one every time they're like, oh, you know, you know, it touches us I know no, but not only that but they go, you know, a meteor just missed us by you know 4,000 miles or something and I'm like what listen. I feel as if I could become president. All right. Yeah Meteors logistically makes the most sense. Okay, I would say the next one the least likely is uh fucking

Becoming president. Yeah, of course because there's only 45 So that's a toughie. We got no shot. That's not happening. No, um But There's more of a chance of that happening than a meteor hitting my house. Yes, and now the next I would say I Dating a mill becoming a pro athlete would be 18 that maybe Because I'm not yeah, it's that's these other ones. You know, I'm gonna say struck by lightning

You think no, dude the chances of getting struck by lightning are so slim Yeah, but how many athletes are there? You have probably have a better chance of becoming a professional athlete than you do by getting struck by lightning Yeah, yes, that's my 18. That's my 18 for sure Getting struck by lightning. Yes Lightning doesn't strike twice. Yeah Just saying stuff. You've swayed me. Okay. I'll say struck by lightning Now it's pro athlete. Yeah, for sure. Okay. So now it's pro athlete 17. These dogs are done

Now we have 16, right? And now I'm stuck between two Okay, we have dating a supermodel and dating a millionaire Which one are you more likely to sway? A millionaire because they could just be like looking for like a dude with good dick And I could just do that So there's a better chance of you dating a millionaire. Oh because millionaires could be just like Just just a girl, but a supermodel is like, oh jeez. Now you're gonna be a whole thing. There's a whole thing

It's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. It's a whole thing They got stuff they got models have stuff tons of stuff. Yeah, it's too much stuff going on Um, so 16 would say dating a millionaire Oh, no, no, no. Yeah dating a supermodel dating a supermodel is is 16 16 Now you could always sway a supermodel. Maybe they like funny dude. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you know And maybe maybe looks isn't like the number one thing. It's like the number three thing. Yeah You know and uh, then that could you know, then maybe but dude, there's models. There's models out there that would suck us, bro Not supermodels

What's a supermodel? like Adriana Lima so like a victoria secret model. Yeah Uh, and then millionaire after that Maybe now no no, I would say These are tough. Yeah, I would say possibly Oh, it's injury from getting I thought it was dying from a lawnmower. No Injury. All right, I'll go with dating a millionaire. It seems like the safest one

Yeah, because there's not a lot of millionaires. So the so like and there's you know, so just the statistics. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah You have a better chance of whatever if like a girl's family is rich Is that a millionaire or she has to have it herself? Yeah. Okay. I mean if she inherits it Yeah, so I was gonna say that could bring it up a little bit because like you just date a girl whose family has money, you know Yeah, but still I just feel like there's not a lot of I mean, there's a lot of millionaires Yeah, but for the most part There's way more people who aren't I agree with you 15. You swayed me. Yeah, uh 14. I'm gonna have this is getting tough Yeah, I'm gonna have to go with injury for mowing a lawn. I'd never mow a lawn. I've never mowed a lawn

No, dude, you think you have a better chance of getting murdered Then injuring your foot. Yeah while mowing a lawn. Yeah, there's probably a fucking single mom out there mowing her lawn And she's you know, she's clipped her goddamn pinky off. I don't know man. Where we live Barbara's out there We live where we live There's just more people so the chance of getting murdered is higher just because there's But how many people are getting murdered? Oh, I don't know versus injured by whatever I know my mother's been injured by a lawn mower before but she's never been murdered. She's never been murdered that we know That we know of I don't know anyone personally who's been murdered. I don't think

And if I do then it's one But I don't it's not like you ever Do you know people who are like I did my friend where it's murdered? And if you I mean, I obviously everyone says there's some degree of separation, but it's not a lot I've known one person who's been shot and killed before right So like Yeah, that's not that common. Yeah Like people are getting murdered obviously, but also there's a lot of lawns being mowed right

Yeah So I would say murdered 14 murder. Yeah, probably not gonna get murdered probably not gonna get murdered. I mean, I don't know. We'll see Being the victim of a serious crime in your lifetime No, that could definitely happen Yeah, I would say 13 dying from being bit by a venomous snake Venomous spider. Yeah, venomous spider. Yeah, because of where we live. Yeah, that's not gonna happen. That's not gonna happen That's not gonna happen. It's not gonna happen

Is it gonna happen? It's gonna happen. It's not gonna happen. Um 12 dying while rollerblading I don't think anyone rollerblades. That's what I'm saying If I'm being honest though, I saw three people rollerblading yesterday and I was kind of freaked out I thought I was in like hot tub time machine. I'm like, what year is it? Why are people did they have those little scratch hands? I used to fuck with those though. Yeah Dude, they were a little fucking cool like fucking little gloves. It felt like Shawn Michaels You put like the things on and you're like, I could just slam my hand on the desk Yeah, those were cool. Wow. I'm so glad you remember those. But yeah, probably dying while rollerblading

That's not gonna happen because I'm not gonna rollerblade. You have a better chance of being attacked by a shark than dying with By rollerblading. Actually, that's not true Yes, you do. Yeah. No, you go swimming in the ocean more than you rollerblade. So immediately. Oh, yeah, we're doing the least likely I'm sorry. I thought we were going to the ad Um Okay, so we what do we have left? We have injuries from fireworks shaving death by choking on food injury mowing the lawn Fatally slipping in the bath or shower drowning in the bathtub Transportation accident being the victim of a serious crime getting hemorrhoids

Developing cancer and being attacked by a shark These are now it's getting toughy-tuffy. Let's go the opposite way now Okay, what's the most likely to happen developing cancer? Danny Where do you get off on saying that I'm just saying a lot of people get cancer, bro Yeah, do you think more people get cancer or do you think more people cut themselves while shaving? Yeah, but like injury like by shaving like I get that but it's like I don't know that one doesn't doesn't fit here for me

What it doesn't fit here for me. I don't know I'm trying to answer like realistically you think out of all of these things the most likely to happen Is someone gets cancer before they get hemorrhoids before they cut themselves shaving What if the cancer is causing the hemorrhoid or the that's not how that works, but Also getting into a car accident. I've been in two three Yeah, but that's Wait transportation accident. Oh, I thought that was dying like dying in a car. No, it's an accident

Okay, also dying in a car would still be above that. Okay Number one then go get the white out. Did you like the white out? A little strippy thing that came in like the little like it was like tape So white out white out tape was fire white out was so cool Yes, do you like the the paint or the tape or The pen I like the tape I liked painting painting

Paint my name. I enjoyed painting too, but I always use too much or too little and it pissed me out At least we can agree that the pen is gabanzo. Oh my god, so garbage garbage. That was garbage. You have to squeeze it like Suck that thing was trash trash and you gotta squeeze and be like I didn't like the tape because i'm over there. I'm taping. I'm like, what am I doing? Am I putting up blue tape? It should be cool to be like Let me write right over there. Yeah, I like but also like I would put the tape down I try to write over it and I'm like now I'm fucking up the tape. Yeah, it's all stretched That's why I like doing the paint because then you're like, oh, let it dry

And then you can write and you're good how amazing with sharpening pencils I'm an electric pay fucking pencil sharpener, dude Do you like the electric sharpener or the one you got a crank? No, I don't know the electric one because it's go And then when you finished it then when you finish it just go Because your pencils are ready. Yeah, I love that. Yeah, because when you first put it in it's and it's like flat. It's like You put it in it's like And then eventually it's like yeah, yeah, yeah, and you're like, yeah And then it's like whoa, this pencil is awesome. Then you go to your desk. I think

I used to hate when the when the like the wood Yeah, it's wood would go up over the top on one side of the pen and then you had to peel it and then you had this Stupid little dumb looking pencil and then the piece would break off and fall onto your piece of paper. Yeah I hated that as well. I hated it. Where are we going now? Oh, what's the most likely to happen? I would say What about being a victim of a serious crime? That's not that how many people you know have been in a serious crime Oh, we're going backwards. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. So I would say the most likely to happen here is um A

Injury while shaving because everyone shaves and everyone cuts themselves shaving. So I would say that one Yeah, injury while shaving and now the next one. I would probably say the car accident transportation accident Because that could be anything you being an uber and it gets hit you being oh, so I've been in four I've been in an uber when I get hit by a car. Have you fell in the shower more than you've been in in car accidents? No, but I'm also thinking that one. It's that's also fatally you die in the shower

Oh, I thought it was just like it's like a fatality like my own amount. No, no, no like you're dead. Okay It's fatal. So I would say that two is probably the transportation. Okay thing Yeah, you transport you've been in fender benders. Yeah, you transport every day Yeah, you could definitely die from that for sure or get in a bad accident more likely than these other things um And then three I would say three would probably be Maybe Maybe mowing the lawn and that's why choking on food. Maybe

I don't think that many people die from that That's what I'm saying. Then it like wouldn't be like. Oh god. I keep forgetting The next one I would say is either like injury from mowing the lawn just because I think it's Vague enough to be like yeah, no one's doing that shit. No one's doing that shit. No one's mowing shit. I'm not getting hurt either I'm a fucking gangster. You're fucking it up again. What am I doing now? This is gonna be the most likely stuff Oh, it's the most likely then I think I'm most likely to like I the only reason why I'm saying mowing the lawn get a hemorrhoid I don't know how likely

You would go hemorrhoids all I'm saying is we have a friend of ours They guys got a hemorrhoid who showed us his hemorrhoids. Yeah, he had I paid him $500 to show us I paid him $500 to show a whole group of people whole bunch of people and they were there Yeah, they he definitely had hemorrhoids. Hemorrhoids are pretty or are pretty common All right, so I'll go three hem. Yeah. Yeah, get a hemorrhoids. Why not and then four? I probably go the lawn just because I'm sure people get injured doing it. I just don't really mow lawns There's a lot of people that mow their lawns, right then injury from fireworks

You know what? I'd say we go back Why I would I would the only I would say just by sheer numbers here I would say It depends what serious crime means because I'm between serious crime and cancer because I know a bunch of people get cancer at every single year Yeah, but I don't know how many people are actually the crime might be it because the serious crime could mean anything assault Domestic violence like that's probably the one Jesus. What? Which is kind of the same thing I guess yeah a little different

I think the charges are different if it's domestic. All right, but what I'm saying is like That's probably the one because there's more things that could happen like cancer. So like it's one thing Yeah, but you can get cancer anywhere brother No, but I'm not but I'm saying cancer is like but you can get a million sicknesses Yeah, you know but but and that's kind of like what it is Like because crimes it would be like if you get assaulted I think I'm I think people are more likely to get cancer than they are to like Have a crime committed to them

A serious one But what does serious mean? I don't know assault Embezzlement Embezzlement. We got to count some white collar crime here. Yeah, uh tax evasion. Yeah, that's carry some time Murder, you know rapes Solid daily hit and runs Man slaughter DUI vehicular manslaughter DUI. I don't think it's a serious one Yeah, a DUI is a serious crime you go to jail for DUI dude. Yeah, but you're not the victim of a DUI

Or you are the DUI No, because what if somebody in DUI kills you that's vehicular manslaughter. Oh, you said that? Yeah. Oh, okay Or involuntary or whatever whatever, you know, I think I don't know. I think it might be that one I'm gonna put I'm gonna go cancer For five for five I'm gonna put the crime and then I'm gonna make crime six and then I'm gonna make cancer six Okay And now seven now what we have left is we have being attacked by a shark

Drowning in the bathtub fatally slipping in the shower death by choking food injuries from fireworks 11 Is we're on right 11 now it's least likely to happen Drowning in a bathtub not that likely. No, I'm not drowning in there. Yeah, probably Not that likely I don't take baths either Wait, what about being attacked by a shark? Dude, you can get attacked by a shark that was gonna be my 10

Yeah, but some people don't like the beach and some people don't live in an area where there is sharks I'm gonna make it my 10 still I'm gonna make it my 11 Okay, and then I'm gonna make drowning the bathtub 10. Okay. Okay now We have there's three left. There's three left and I think we should start from So the other two are deaths. So I think injuries automatically I could definitely blow my hand up. Yeah, so that would be this would wait. What number would that be fuck nine? No It would be seven seven

Seven eight nine. Yeah seven eight nine our lives. So seven would be fireworks eight Fucking I don't know eight. I have a better chance of choking on food than I do of dying in a bathtub. Yes 100% you have a better chance of choking on food. So that would be eight Yes, eight and then nine Four fatally slipping in the shower. Nice. So as it reads Injury from shaving most likely to happen. Yes, okay, then we have Transportation accident. Yes, then we have getting hemorrhoids. Yes, then we have

Injury from mowing the lawn You know Janice is over there cutting our ankles up to bits not paying attention Being the victim of a serious crime, you know, you get punched in the back of the head for your wallet Uh developing cancer Injuries from fireworks death by choking on food Fatally slipping in the shower. Mm-hmm drowning in the bathtub. Yes Being attacked by a shark dying while rollerblading Dying from being bitten by a venomous spider

Uh Oh being murdered dating a millionaire. So we said that you have a better chance of being murdered than dating a millionaire Which is I guess is true. Yeah, there's more. There's probably more murders than there are millionaires in the world Yeah, way more, you know Um for playing a numbers game here dating a supermodel becoming a pro athlete Struck by a lightning becoming president meteor landing on your house That's how you assess

assess risk Let's see what this kid put. Oh, he said it. Yeah, he had some stuff. Okay. So now we get to just judge him All right, let's see what he has Number one. He put injury from shaving. Okay. He put hemorrhoids two And we had hemorrhoids three. So, you know, he's got a more banged up butt than a bang old butt. Uh three he had cancer Yeah, he's a big cancer guy too. He's a big cancer guy. I don't know about that Four he had

Oh, so there was two. This is why I took one of these out. There was two cancers. It was woman getting cancer and man getting cancer I was like, let's just book. Yeah, I don't I don't want to segregate the cancer. He said, yes. It's not sexist show Yeah, um four was the man developing cancer five was being killed Oh the transportation accident. I just put transportation accident, but he put five Six drowning in a bathtub. We have drowning in a bathtub as 10 So we're a little off. This kid thinks that people are drowning in bathtubs. That's right. It's still taking baths I mean, he's in school. Maybe they're teaching them some statistics that I don't know about but I don't know about people Yeah, I've fallen asleep behind the wheel in a bathtub or anything. No, no, no, no, no

Dating a millionaire is seven, dude This is one of the hottest kids ever Or his parents own energy or something. You know what I mean? This guy has seven as dating a millionaire This kid has oil money. This kid's got oil money. Who the fuck is this? Um eight death by choking on food same one as us. Okay. Nice. All right. We're back in the same ball game here Let's go nine fatally slipping in the bathroom or shower. That's us too. We got the same brain This guy thinks he's fucking hot. Yeah, that's this is way hot, but I don't know 10

Being the victim of a serious crime Being attacked by a shark. We have we have the shark. We have the shark which he has at 19 pussy Where does this kid live the sahara desert? Yeah, god, dude. Go in the ocean. There's sharks dog. Yeah, come on, man Jesus go get some sun you bastard See, maybe he is rid. Did you just fight? You fought it. I felt the vibration through my leg. No, no, no, no. What do you have for 15? No, I felt it Go through the chair of my leg. Yeah for it. Yeah, it chilled my spine

Um, what do we go? Where are we going? We are worth what are you at 12? And just letting you know there's four farts hidden throughout this episode if you find all of them I will send you something People are gonna find those farts. Yeah, there's four of them. Uh, 12 was injury from fireworks No, uh, 13 Being murdered that he had there. What do we have 14 close close? No cigar Uh

What do we have 14 dating a supermodel? We had 16 this kid really thinks he's hot. This guy thinks he fucks. I need to see a picture of this kid. Uh, what was that 14 15? Uh, where is 15? Becoming a pro athlete. Oh, and now he thinks he's an athlete. This guy fucks models and is an athlete? 16 becoming president. All right, who the fuck is this man? Who is this kid? He thinks he's gonna be president? This kid's got one of the most warped realities on life I've ever seen but I can't wait to look at a picture of him. He's just it just makes sense 17 dying from being bitten by a venomous spider

He must live in a gated community apparently because this presidential child. It hasn't seen a spider in ages uh 18 I see the president more than I see spiders come on Uh 18 he has being struck by lightning What did we do? We had it. Yeah back on track with the hot kid. All right hot fucking president Uh 19 being attacked by a shark No, and then 20 was meteor landing on your house All right, so we had some okay, so wait he thinks there's a better chance of him being attacked by a shark

No, he thinks there's least there's less of a chance of him beginning attacked by a shark Then becoming president. I know of the united shesh It's not even like 45 people There's been 45. You know any people get attacked by sharks? 45 today unless this kid has hydrophobia. Yeah. Yeah, but in that case it would be 20. I think That's insane. That's wild All right, Andrew

Let's look at a picture of him. Let's stalk this kid. Oh, he's lucky his private Fucking piece of shit. What's his name? I'll cross reference on google It's got a LinkedIn. He's in high school. Is he in high school? Yeah, but let's look up his high school Let's look up a high school boy. Oh, yeah This is his picture. Look at him. Look at him. He's in black and white. He knows what he's doing He's wearing a suit. So maybe he doesn't know the president maybe does or maybe he went to prom Um, why did I make that noise? Why did I make that noise? No, we might have to we'll fix that post Um n m h s. What's n? Oh, that's a high school

n m h s look up his stats. Oh new jersey. Oh no milford Oh, I was I was thinking new mexico New milford high school New mexico high school. No, yeah The whole state goes to the same school. Okay. He goes to new milford. Uh, he knows the president Probably one of the hottest kids alive. He's a shit a good chance of dating a supermodel and becoming president apparently good for you Good for you. Give a couple years. Give a couple years Uh, go to prom first and then figure it out. Um, but before you become president. That's how you assess

That's how you assess a risk I got you, bud. Thank you so much. Um, yeah, but that is that's all for this week's episode. Danny, where can they find you, bud? You can find my bed You can find me my bed You can find me setting a bed on fire Okay, uh, you can find me at danielo prior on instagram and twitter make sure to go check out the stank podcast on patreon patreon.com That's the stank podcast and on youtube and anywhere you listen to little little potty tunes. Okay, so You can go there everything's at the stank podcast, especially on instagram much love frankie. I miss you

Uh, guys go check out other people's lives another podcast. I do with my buddy greg You can check it out youtube.com slash other people's lives And go follow this show on instagram at the baseman yard and our patreon We do a daily morning show called the morning meeting Monday to friday go check that out patreon.com slash the baseman yard and that is all see you guys the next time. I'm doing the jimmy fallon Fuck me. He has money for cameras. Yeah You