The Basement Yard - #241 - Almost Got Stabbed By A Homeless Guy
Episode Date: May 11, 2020On this episode, Danny has multiple homeless run-ins at 7/11's and whale poop. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
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Welcome back to the basement yard Danny. How you doing? Is that a new chain? Yeah
More jewelry
What are you talking about? That's it. When did you get that? I?
got this like
Two weeks ago really a week ago, maybe and I haven't seen about a week ago a week ago
That's why that'd be tricky. Oh tricky. Oh, hey, but some of us if I see but those are the lyrics to that song
You know those are the exact lyrics. Actually. I actually look them up on genius. Mmm. Yeah
Yo, by the way this morning. I had oatmeal. I forgot how
Hard it is to eat that shit
Oatmeal is fucking garbage. Well, it's good though
It's it's a dying person's meal like when you're dying they give it to you
For some reason they give it to old people who are like on their way out and they don't know what's what they can't put on their socks
Right, so I'm like, I don't know if I don't put enough water in it, but it's definitely like eating quicksand
But some people like they like their oatmeal lumpy
Like some people are into like lumpy oatmeal
Lumpy like that's a thing. It's like I like my oatmeal lumpy, but what is what would oh, I guess that would mean that less water
So it's like I
Was eating straight sand today
I was eating sand but people you ate oatmeal
Like because there was nothing to eat or you're like trying to be like healthy
No, I just ate it because like I didn't want to have fucking, you know, there's like fruity pebbles in the cabinet
I'm like, well, you know, I'll go into a diabetic shock if I have that
Hey
That wasn't sensitive that wasn't sensitive, but it's okay. It's okay because my friend has diabetes
Yeah, that's true. That's true. Yeah, my friends are black
Speaking of oatmeal, there's people that eat that shit every day like that's their go-to breakfast and it's fucking disgusting. I
Was that person want I went through a phase. I went through an oatmeal phase
Where like I would cut up bananas and put it in bananas really help because it adds some sort of flavor
Oh, yeah, like blueberries and shit are great on I fucking drown this shit in cinnamon also
Cuz and that doesn't help because my mouth gets even more dry from the cinnamon
So you got dry and you got dry cinnamon, you know I'm saying desert mouth. Have you ever done the cinnamon challenge?
Yeah, it's it's yeah, it's impossible. I
Think there's some way to beat it
Like I think I looked it up on YouTube once and it was like there was like a way that you could like beat it
I
When I tried it, I tried to beat it so bad
I wanted to and I just put the spoon in my mouth and I held it in my mouth and I wanted my saliva just to soak
All of the cinnamon
Yeah, but your mouth just goes nah
We're not gonna create saliva and it just like what I did
When I did the cinnamon challenge, I did it out of a fucking tablespoon because I got tricked
I this was one like cinnamon challenge like wasn't a thing
Like not a teaspoon a fucking table. Yeah, I was trying to figure out the difference between those cuz I forget like
You know, I'd never know what a tablespoon or a teaspoon just one
Just pick a spoon just a one spoon would suffice
Why do we need bigger spoons like how about put less in the spoon if you
And it's also it's like use a tablespoon of olive oil and it's like am I really gonna pour this into a spoon and then into a
Skillet more dishes. Fuck that. Yeah, fuck this shit. I don't want more dishes. Yeah
I'm so I have you know, I have a real bad condition when it comes to doing dishes. You have a
Just double-hyphenate
I did double a breath a dub
Double-hyphenate. I fucked up. It's it's abbreviate. So oh
What's a hyphen? Oh, that's like Julia Louis dry fists. Yeah. Yeah, like when you give your kid two names because you don't know who you love more or whatever
That's another weird thing to me too
Um
What that people change last names well, no, no, no, no, no like
All right for girls, right when they get married. Yeah, most of the time
They have to change their name to to a completely different name, right? We've talked about this. Yes now
Whenever it is that you get married or whatever would you
Be tight if they didn't take your last name we're fighting
We're gonna fight in the lawn for it that's for sure you think so yeah, I mean
Not just it would depend if she's fucking
You know Pamela Anderson
Then I get it but also my last name is so long that I don't know if you want to add another name to that I
Know it's like would you would you give into the hyphen? That's the thing
I think I would give into the hyphen. I could I could be sold on it
But it's like yo if if you're not if it's not like a
Part of your brand then I would kind of be offended
Damn, dude. You said that mad business like no because like if you're like a brand like you're you're let's say your Pamela Anderson
I mean your your child is gonna be you know
Little Joey Anderson San Agato, and he's gonna sound like a fucking bank. It's and that's a banks name
That's a banks or like a law firm. Yeah. Yeah, like what are we doing here? Are we suing people or are we a child in second grade?
It's ridiculous
Would it be a deal breaker? She was like I'm not taking your last name, and she and she didn't have a brand
Kind of not no it would that's just an ego talking. I would like right I would like to be sold on it
I also would like to be you know at the point where I don't know that is strange though
Because I could get both sides it is strange for her to be like fuck no no fucking way
But it also is strange that we actually change names like why?
That's what I'm saying. It's like now you got to change like all your credit cards and shit and like you got to do mad shit
Honestly, if I was a woman
That would be the main reason why I don't want to change it because I don't want to go to the DMV
Yeah, fuck that or like have to mail stuff and just start you know dude
You ever start like a new like a the new year like every time you would write the date on shit
You fuck it up imagine your name is changed. Oh, yeah
Like and I since I moved like I had to do so much like oh this is my new address
Oh, this is my new address. Oh, this is my new address like 700 times and it's driving me fucking crazy
Dude, and yeah, and you lived at your old apartment for three years imagine having the same last name for 30
And then now it's suddenly a different thing
Yeah, that's why you literally become a different person
It's so dumb. I don't know why we do that. It's so weird. Also. I feel like the name has to go with the last name though
Yeah, there's nothing that goes with my last name. That's the thing
No, that's not true unless I married like an Asian woman whose last name was like very short like Chen or something
Seriously
Like I got oh, yeah, like Chen Sanogato doesn't sound as bad as Anderson Sanogato. It's like it sounds like the name of a yacht
It's it's a it's a syllable. It's a syllable game for you
Yeah, it's too many also a child with a last name with this many letters. It's irresponsible. It's gonna fail
Like their test, you know how like they have those tests. We have to know how to write your name
This kid's getting it way harder than everyone else. Mike Smith over here. It's got an easy path to success
He's halfway through the test before you're halfway through your fucking name Joseph Anderson Sanogato. I
Love that you you just picked that you're marrying Pamela. Yeah, you want to go carbon electric we can go there, too
Dude, she looked fuck yeah
Yeah, I'm not I don't mean to like typecast but like
People in that career or whatever she had every excuse like look like shit
You know what I mean? It's like, you know time isn't usually good to people that like party and do all that stuff
And I don't know what she's been up to. I know she's married to Dave Navarro
so that guy's a fucking weirdo, but
When she came on the screen and I was like, yeah, yep. Yeah, I remember her
Yeah, so she was in the Jordan documentary. She was in the Jordan documentary for anyone who doesn't know and she came on the screen
I was like who the fuck is this 23 year old?
Just look at amazing
Look at amazing. Can we talk about how you didn't talk to me on the Instagram story last night?
And you decided to just post a picture of ruffles
So I really get tired of this shit. I'm really watching a movie
Okay, but I know you weren't because when you showed the thing of the ruffles I saw on the TV
It said the game show network. So now you're lying to me. Oh, that was after yes
You know what movie it was?
It better be a good movie. I'm gonna fucking flip. I thought it was okay the impossible
Kim possible
Call me beat me if you want to fuck me if you want to touch me. That's okay
Oh, you remember that that's so raven. Hey now, would you say now go can't tell she survives a pain now
And the booze get break down. Yeah, everything go change now. Let's rock
They have rough the weirdest thing about that shows that they went through her eye be cool if they went through her asshole
Can you imagine she was like wait, I think I see something
This is a completely different show
It's gonna be a red light just for no reason just normal fucking things. But yeah, it's gonna be a fight
What was that show even about? She could tell the future. What was it?
Ah
Yeah, she could like see the future or some shit. I don't know man. That show is so we watch so much dumb shit
No ordinary teenager Raven Baxter can see glimpses glimpses of the future. Okay
Hey now, would you say now?
Hey now, what you saying now?
Y'all Frankie knows that front to back like yeah, not not one part of that sentence fucking surprised
It's so well. Oh my god. Oh my god. Hold on. I want to call
I'm gonna call them and make them do it. Oh, that'd be great
See if he knows it so he also knows all the high school musical dances
That I that I know that I've seen yo Frank
Real quick. I'm recording the basement yard right now. Can you do the rapping part of the that's so Raven theme song?
The rapping part of the that's so Raven theme song
Yeah
Yeah, and he also knows the high school musical dances, right?
You did one at my apartment once
I at one point in my life had known the choreography to one song from high school musical
I cannot confirm which song
Uh
It was from high school musical too. It's called work this out. It's it is a banger. It is a slap
Damn
It's called work this out. I really want to do impress Vanessa Hudgens. Yeah
I just you know didn't know how and that was the most logical step. Hey man. I I get it. He's got to talk that shit. Yeah
What are you what are you gonna do? I mean if anything would impress here? It would be
a then you know 15 year old boy knowing the choreography to uh one song from high school musical too
Oh, yeah, honestly, honestly, you just missed it. You just missed her. I think I think that you you know if you would have
learned maybe one more song
You know that Vanessa Hudgens
I mean
My life has progressed to a point where Vanessa Hudgens is not on the top of my list anymore. Uh, however
I'm into learning dances just to learn dances. So
You know, you know, why are you not on tiktok? Frank is gonna be on tiktok soon. Grow your dances
I can confirm. I will not be on tiktok, but I will be on other forms of social media. Great. Thank you so much, Frank
I appreciate you on the stake later, Frankie
Oh
Frankie what a guy fucking nailed that though. He knocked that out of the park. He also did it at like 10x speed
Hey, I was saying
That's twisted unbelievably wild unbelievably wild. Um, another thing that's been unbelievably wild is uh
All right, so let me just preface. Um, I know, uh, homeless people usually have some stuff
but um
I don't give a shit right now
Or they don't have a lot of stuff or they don't have a lot of stuff and they're just dicks
Well, that's why they're homeless. They don't have a lot of stuff. Boom. But I'm out. Boom pow
That was dope. I got them. Um, all right, so here's the thing
I'm from new york
I know homeless
I've seen it. I've seen the ups. I've seen the downs
Pretty much have been borderline homeless in my mind
um
But I've seen homeless shit and I've seen and I've had react uh interactions with homeless people
Of course, I've been in florida for two weeks
And I've never had a worse
Time with homeless people in my entire life. They don't have good homeless people out there
They're terrible
The homeless here are animals
What happened? All right, so listen, did the homeless people were the ones who were biting faces?
On bat yeah down here. Yeah, the bats all people. All right, so first one
It's like two o'clock in the morning. I'm going to 7 11
At two o'clock in the morning
Yeah, two o'clock in the morning. Okay
Boy need pop tarts, uh, I get out I get out of 7 11. Uh, I get out of the car
And a dude who's like maybe like he's socially distancing himself. He's like seven feet away, which is good
Like I'm like, all right. He goes. Hey, man. I know you
I go, oh cool. Like maybe he's like a fan of the show or something. I'm like, all right, cool. Like I'm like, oh
Oh, cool, man. What's up? He's like, I was like, what do you know?
Like what uh, you're a fan of the show and he was like, what are you talking about?
Then at this point I go, all right now
I know this person's absolute fucking maniac and uh, he's like, what are you talking about and then I was like, oh, I was like, uh
Like like from instagram or something
Again goes, what are you talking about?
And then I go
Dude, all right, bro. Like, all right. So where do you know me from? He's like, I know you I go, dude
what's good with you
As soon as he heard what's good
It was
instant mail challenge
So he was just like, what's good?
So now we're getting into a what's good off
We're getting into a grown man. What's good off with a homeless person in the middle of a pandemic
Yeah, in the middle of a pandemic, I'm really I'm willing to risk it all to what's good this fucking bum
So I'm like, yo, what's good? What's good?
So I go, yeah, bro. Yeah, I was like, yeah, I'm going in here and you get pop tarts and seltzer
I was like, dude, if you if I come out here and you're still like harassing me and like coming after me
I'm gonna beat the fucking shit out of you
I'm like now I have to scare this bum off
So I go in there
I'm watching him the whole time while I'm like getting seltzer and getting pop tarts and just gathering my fucking late night haven of snacks
And I'm I'm just now I'm checking out and we're looking at each other through the glass in the window the fucking 7-eleven
Okay
So I get outside
The what's good off happens again. He's like, yo, what's up? What's up now?
This wonderful Haitian man from inside the 7-eleven runs out with one of those like billy club bats
Runs out one of the billy club bats and it's like, ah, get out of here. What I tell you about being around here
Scared him off like a cat
So I'm like, oh my god, I'm like, yeah
Scared him off and he was short. He was like five foot two. Just didn't give a fuck. I'm not get out of here
Like the whole thing so I'm just like, oh my god. All right. All right. So this guy ran off
And I was like, yo, what's what's up with this dude? I was like, what this dude was bothering me the whole time
He's like, yeah, he's like like
He should be in jail right now. I just called the cops. Uh, he stabbed somebody in front of here last week
Bro
I almost what's good in myself into getting fucking stabbed outside of a 7-eleven with pop tarts in my hand
Uh, uh, Danny Lopiori, you know, he died doing what he loved
Fighting a bum
What's good in a bum, uh, he walks he what's good in right into a stabbing so
You always did love saying what's good. Yo, that's yo, that's why I'm afraid. That's why I'm afraid of like fights
I'm so all right
Even craze your story. You got another bum days late. Yeah two days later and this should you guys
This is if this shit is
You think any of this is false? May god strike me down with lightning through my asshole. Okay
I go to another 7-eleven
I get a pack of uno cards. This is a different 7-eleven
Completely different one. I don't even go to that one anymore. Okay
I go to completely different 7-eleven to get uno cards and a connect four set
Which I'm fucking amazing at yeah
You're really good at connect four too, right? I love connect four
Damn, yeah, you should play each other online. Yeah
All right, um, so I'm in there. I'm getting the cards, right?
and this guy was a
the mystique of
of
Bumps like he could take a form of like maybe somebody who isn't homeless or like maybe some of that is homeless
He was so french home. He was so free. I didn't know he was a french home. Yeah. Yeah, so french home
He had like wireless headphones on i'm like, okay, whatever like he's very confusing
They wear like scarfs and you're like this isn't a homeless item of clothing like what are you? Yeah, are you homeless?
That's that's what i'm saying now
Like and he's he's on his headphones, right?
I'm like I see him doing this so i'm like he's on a phone call whatever like this guy's regular
Because I see him as i'm going in the store like i'm looking now i'm fucking my my bum sense is heightened to all-time high
I'm like the spider-man of bum fighting
Oh
Okay, good, you know
You got some hairs on the back of your neck. You're like, I know a bum fight's about to go down
Dude if there's a bum within like 700 meters, I could feel my fucking arm hairs
This kid's heart rate starts fucking going up when there's a shopping around god
So yo, so i'm in there. I don't have any previous contact with this person
No, no exchange. No, what's good? Nothing not one thing not one thing between me and this fucking disgusting bum
Oh, you'll know why he's disgusting in a second. Okay, did you guys lock eyes? Did you guys lock eyes?
Very briefly. Hey, man. That's a you know an eye lock is worth a million words they say
Right, but i'm masked up too. So it's just like you know what i'm saying? So it's like it's not even like a full one
It's just like you know a gaze a short gaze a glimpse
A glimpse of homeless got into my eyeballs. Okay
So I get the uno cards I get the connect for
I'm walking out
And as I walk out I hear
He fucking spit on me
I'm sorry. He's
He spit he spit on my back
And I turn around and I because I hear the
Like I hear I hear I hear you did not feel
No, no, no, no, no, no, no at the same time it was raining in florida. So I was getting
Fucking yes wetness all over. Yeah, you're just a wet boy
So I hear
And I turn around and as I turn around he does it again
To your front
He's yeah, but I'm farther away from him now. He's spitting like
I'm at my front. He's spitting at my front
Wow, he's spitting at my front. Wow. So he's just like
And I'm like yo and he's like
I do and all this extra bum shit like you know what I mean like talking to himself like
He had like these finger guns and shit and he was like
I'm like, all right, this fucking dude is fucking crazy. So now
He fucking it keeps spitting at the car
And now he's spitting at me all the time
You know immediately like when something's happened like this, I'm like, yo, somebody else needs to see this
I go I'm like I go to my girl. I'm like, yo
This dude is fucking spitting at me
And she looks up and she's like, oh shit. He is
Spitting at the car now like fucking Tupac like coming out of the fucking thing like spitting at the camera and shit
So I'm just like, yo
Now I'm tight
Mad tight
So I'm like, yo, I'ma fuck you up now. I'm like, yo, I'm gonna fuck this bum up
I'm gonna beat the shit out of this bum
Because not only did he spit on my back like he tried to fucking
Houdini me, you know what I'm saying? And you know
People that don't know what a houdini is when you spit on a girl's back
And then they think you come and then they turn around you come in their face. That's what a houdini is
Jesus christ
Anyway, uh, so now I'm like, yo, I'm gonna fuck this bum up cooler heads prevail
I'm driving away
Do not say he jumped on the back of your car
No, no, no, no, can I can I say the word?
It's the f word
He screamed it at you
Yeah
I mean go nuts. He's so this guy was
incoherent
everywhere was
And then like
Just fucking paranoid schizophrenia like type shit like all of it came back to that
Couldn't make out one word. He was saying the one word that he decides to form is faggot
He's goes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah faggot
And for some reason the 16 year old in me just couldn't take this
So I pull the car over
I lower the window
I have a bandana over my face
I looked this bum in the eye and I go wait here. Don't move
And
I drive I drive off
And I was like, yo, I'm gonna drop you off here and I'm gonna go back there
I'm gonna beat the shit out of this bum and I'm a spit in his mouth
And then I was like, yo
Let's think about the outcome here
You fight a bum
Probably moves anything. That's enough
That's enough
But here's what I wanted to get to the whole thing. That's a salt brother. Yeah
Spitting on someone is a salt. He assaulted me. Yes. You've been assaulted. I was assaulted by a bum
Man times last night
I go into a 7-eleven and I don't have a mask. Okay
This is a bum. This is this is a worker. I don't have a mask
So I tie a shirt around my face. I'm running in. I just want to read those dude. I just want cool rain
I
Go in there and from behind the glass
When I tell you that this guy looked like the fucking slicker dude from last action hero
This guy was disgusting and I don't want to judge him
But he was the only reason I'm judging him was because what he said to me
As soon as I get up there, I get up there with he lets me walk around the store
Get the cool ranch Doritos in my hand put them on the counter goes. That's not a mask
I go. Yeah, but it's it's cloth. It's tied. I understand. No, I'm saying I'm really really polite. I'm like, yeah
I know I'm sorry. I forgot it in the hotel and he's like, uh, he's like it's not a mask
and I was like, okay
Do you have a mask I can buy like can I buy a mask and he was like no
and I was like
Okay, and then I was like do you have a go I say I was like I see these bandanas here
Can I buy that go outside put it on and then come back? Does that qualify? He's like no
I'm like, okay
So I can't buy these Doritos and he was just like no if someone comes in here looking as ridiculous as you do right now
We could get shut down
Joe
When I tell you that I fired off on this dude
I look at him in the face. I go dude
I go look at you right now
You're fucking ridiculous. Can I buy the fucking Doritos or not?
Because now I've just had it with just fucking
7-11. I'm never going to a fucking 7-11. I was just gonna say
Maybe never again
I was like, dude, I was like, yo, do you like think I'm like and then I like I felt bad because I was like, yo
Do you think I'm like one of these like homeless dudes in here coming in here at three o'clock in the morning?
I was like I came in here in a car my fucking wallet is more expensive than anything in it
I'm an idiot. So I'm just like, you know, I'm like, dude, I just wanted Doritos
Can I get them or not now I'm getting I'm fucking tight and he was just like, no, you look ridiculous
I go, dude, look at you. You're you look ridiculous
And I was like, fuck you I said fuck you to the guy
And I sat in my car for five minutes and I actually went back in and apologized to him
And when I apologized to him, he goes can't be in here without a mask. I don't know how many times I gotta tell you
I go, yo, man. I I open the door. I just go, yo, man. I want I apologize. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you
Like I'm sorry. I cursed at you and then he just goes you're not supposed to be in here without a mask
And I was like, you know what? Fuck you and left
You're having quite the run-ins at seven eleven, buddy, dude, and I don't and I and I wait and
These have all happened at different times of the day though. The bum spitting was the earliest one
That should was it like two o'clock in the afternoon the guy spit on my back
You would think that is a late night sort of action spitting, but apparently not
Maybe you shouldn't go back to seven eleven. Is it is it wrong to like be bothered by home like like not like them
If they're spitting at you, that's what I'm saying
If the pups spit at me, I'd punch them. I'd punch them in the holy face
bro
I've been thinking about this fucking bum for four days
How many days it's been this bum has been on my mind day and night
It's got real estate in there
I never asked. Do you like Kid Cudi?
Um, I never really got into him. I don't dislike him. I just don't know
I like some of his I think I think you would like he could I think you would like Kid Cudi
Yeah, I don't know. I haven't I haven't really listened to him to be honest with you
Did you hear the new song you put out with Travis Scott? No
It's fire. Yeah, what's it called? Yeah, it's dope. It's called the scott's because his name's scott in real life
Yes, um
The other thing I wanted to ask you to
You've been going on all these runs, right? Yes. What's your what's your music rotation like right now?
um
Like are you going albums or straight singies?
I make I yeah like I'd make playlists
And do you run to like straight rap or do you or the type of person you could run the opera like you're just a weird freak
No, no, no, no. I either run to like so I have a running playlist. There's a bunch of rap on it. It's mostly rap
But then there's some old there's like, uh
Smells like teen spirit
Uh thunderstruck paranoid
By black Sabbath. So you so you just have like every uh
like high school
Football fucking uh panama. You know what I'm saying?
I like tape. Yeah
Yeah, dude, I'm fucking I'm out there. Um, but it's mostly rap. But yeah, or like what's the one song right now?
Not eat but like, you know, some shit like that. What's the one song though? That's like
You know like every time you're working out and there's one song on your playlist though that you play seven times in a row
What's the song right now made you look by nozz
It's just the one that gets you going right now
I can't start with that song and needs to hit me on like
Like two and a half miles in and then all of a sudden you hear
Dope and you're like, oh
You just take off dude. It's great. See like now. Let's get it all the perspective. I'm like, oh my god
I'll say my caught top. Let's say the titties is out. Yo, that was one of my favorite obviously for me
But dude, that was one of my favorite fucking lines of a hip-hop song ever
I probably look insane when I run because I like I really get into it and when I'm tired. I like literally
Like I'll I'll do this
I'll be running like I just ran for a touchdown like this is our house
I swear to god when I get tight like I'm running and I'm like I'm in pain. I'm like, ah
Yeah, you have to
people
Like have different ways like expressing themselves like when they're exercising
That's fully normal to me. Like if I saw that, I'm like, yeah, my man's getting it. It's crushing if I didn't even know you
Oh my god
And when I'm in that zone of like I want to quit so bad
But like I'm forcing myself to keep going and there's a bunch of that and I see people
Who are
Who we're jogging
And then are walking now. I've never done it
But a part of me so badly just wants to like lean in just go let's go
Get up
Pick it up
Just freak out on them. They're like, what the fuck dude?
It's turning to a fucking high school coach. So like screaming at people give me 20
Yeah, I just uh, yeah, I've been listening to the fucking
I can't stop listening to 808s
Yeah
Yeah, it's a great up. I always go back to to street lights and paranoid from that out too
Why are you so paranoid
Fuckin amazing with GZ's on there. Obviously heartless is on there. Yeah, that album is so fucking good
Yeah, amazing. It's amazing. It's like
Like the NBA's theme song. I feel like
Oh, yeah, if you slow anything down and like show a layup with that song in it, you're good. It's amazing
And you're like, wow, that was fire
Yeah, we have to when this quarantine is done. We need to film a mock 30 for 30
About the basement yards
And make ourselves look old
And just make it hilarious all of these things like you like I could just do that
We you know, we have to do that dude. You're rich. You have money. You have money. I can't
I was about to hire a Hollywood team to come in here and put gray hairs in our head. Even though I got a few
Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something
Look me in my fucking digital face right now and tell me that you would not love to
get old cosmetics
Put on your face and walk around as an old man for a day a day
I do that for a whole month
It'd be amazing. I
Dream of no matter what you can't take nothing from me just to just to be like
Completely old like yeah, you don't know who I am
And just like noxville bad grandpa shit. Yes
Yes, I would love to do that and just fall down. Can that really be how expensive can that really be?
It's probably expensive to be honest with you. I've looked up for a couple grand. They have these masks that are
Like Hollywood grade masks and if you buy them online, they're like close to a thousand dollars
Let me see you got a house. Sorry. Yes a house phone. I'm gonna take this. I'm gonna take this phone call
He's taking a call. Yes. Oh god
Hey
What are you doing
Yes, yeah, this is what Danny does he puts on fake voices. Yes
Why does he do this?
Yes, what is he doing?
All right
So they asked me more fucking questions at the bum
It was the it was the spit bum. He wanted to spit on me again
I'm saying yo, I'm staying in this hotel and the hotel has been fantastic. It's been great. Whatever these people won't leave me the
Fuck alone. Do I need to take surveys and shit?
Yeah, they were just like, uh, everything all right. I'm like, yo, if you ask me if everything's all right
I'm gonna fucking rip everything off the wall in this place
They're like, is everything or is everything all right? I'm like, you know, the privacy thing is on the door to leave me alone
God, are you ruining my fucking show? I got bums fucking spitting on me
Got people calling me. I got fucking a whole bunch of shit going on
And I'm just trying to live my fucking life and now these people want to call me and ask me if I need
Fucking towels. All right, you know what you take five. I'm gonna do these ads. Okay. God damn it
Yeah, I'm getting really yo, I can't take this quarantine shit anymore, dude. All right. I'm fucking I'm breaking down
I can't fucking take this shit anymore
I want to I want to talk about something as far as the quarantine goes after we come back from ads
Oh my god, please. Is it gonna be happy?
It's kind of funny
All right, uh, the god I want to kill that fucking bum. I want to fuck shut up fucking face the first uh sponsors that we have for today
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Like I said zero sugar 12 grams of protein three net carbs and it tastes good. All right, so
Time to go check that out as soon as this episode ends. I'm gonna order 15 boxes. Okay
Um, but yes, that is all we have for today. Danny. How you doing? Did you just take a hit of your inhaler?
Yeah
Oh boy struggling today, aren't you?
I'm just mad at this again worked up over these bums. They're messing with my shit. I hear you man. I hear you
Well, listen
I wanted to talk to you because there's something funny that actually I saw on twitter. I'm trying to find it now
um, but there was a
Billionaire
Right who had posted on his instagram
I believe his name was david geffer or something like that
And he posted a picture of his yacht, which is
the size
Of a stadium
basically
Okay, and he posted something like uh the sunset. I'm stuck in
Wherever the fuck he was some beautiful place and he's like I hope everyone's staying safe
The fucking balls on this guy
Dude, there's people who don't have one dollar
And you're on your fucking yacht. That's bigger than
18 of our houses
We're we're like in the world was he
Granted Dean wherever what is that granada? I don't granada
I don't know is granada a place. I don't know. I think that's a bruno mars song
I think that's like a like when the when the bad guys that call a duty would throw a grenade at you
No, but so this I went into looking to the ship the the yacht can accommodate
uh
18 guests
right
and a staff of
55 people
Wow
Why even if you had 18 at all times, why would you need?
Three people to every person
That math has to be wrong. It's a little wrong
But if think about it if it was 20 and 60 it's 18 and 55 it's close to three
Now now I really want to know how many people to a person
It's like to my cal. It's like 2.7 or something
I'm gonna I'll be the judge of that. So you said it's 55 people, right?
It's 55 people
18 total guests. Oh, you're right. It is. It's 3.05 people
Yeah, so it's 30. Yeah, you're smart dude. You did that in your head
Dude, because think about it if 55 was 60 and 18 was 20 then it would be three
Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what you did. You went up and then came back. Okay. All right. You know, good good good form
It also has a basketball court
Yeah, what on a fucking boat
This guy is flexing hard on this quarantine. So listen to this also
There's something I wanted to point out to you that I never realized and I I'm gonna ask you this question. Um, okay
The luxury yacht is also equipped with a full gymnasium
A wide-ranging wine cellar and a sauna and a spa
The basket the basketball court on the main deck doubles up as a helicopter pad
When required and the private cinema features are an enormous plasma screen offering limitless entertainment
To royalty and celebrities alike
So they have a basketball court where you can also land a helicapa
Fire dude imagine having that much money
That is insane
And now the question I wanted to ask you
About this because I was looking up facts about this particular boat. Jeff Bezos used to own it
I guess he sold it to him. They're passing around boats like their horse. What is going on?
You say used to own it used to own it. Did I?
Yeah, I think he said owned it. Damn it. Um, he's dissed that boat. No, but he uh
Yeah, he Jeff Bezos used to own it and he fucking you know passed it to this guy some other rich white fuck
and then
Whatever
So how fast?
In miles per hour
Oh, no, do you think?
Generally boats that size go
Like don't even think about like just like a random number think about like a boat goes from like here to florida
Right like how fast do you think that boat's traveling?
Like 110 miles an hour. See that's what I was thinking
But from what I'm reading and this is shocking
this fucking boat
ready
A cruising speed
Of up to 26 knots. Do you know how fast that is jack sparrow? I don't I don't know what a fucking nod is
I don't know anything about knots
A cruising speed of up to 26 knots can easily be achieved and a maximum speed of up to 28 knots
Which if we go to gagoo
Right and we go knots to mph
Because we're not sailors. We're fucking regular human beings. Yeah, what I say 28 knots
28 knots is let me guess go ahead
I
200 and 15 miles an hour
32 miles an hour
Okay, now how do you get anywhere?
Hey guys, uh, we're taking off from new york. We're heading to boston. We'll be there in three days. Yeah, dude
This boat although it's insanely cool and I would still get on it
32
Hey guys, how about knots like
Let's just say miles per hour because it's not far off. How about how about here's your knots
How about not making it so fucking slow?
It's fucking 32 if I were to go to the deli it'll take a couple hours. What the fuck?
Yeah, I think I'm just gonna uber. It's good. You can take your knots and shove it up your fucking ass
It's like, oh, we're gonna go to florida
No, you're not
Because you know florida might not be there by the time you get there, dude
You know, there's two there's two quotes that you say that I just realized because we're saying knots
You're big. Can you stop?
guy
And can you not
It's I mean
I'm just I'm just blown away like I get it's a giant boat, dude
It's so big and whatever
So it makes sense that it wouldn't go I mean 200s. It's ridiculous to me
Yeah, but I'm thinking of it like this, right?
How would you even slow down a boat that fast?
But when you're on a plane, you don't know how fast you're going until you look at the clock
And listen, I'm not comparing a plane to a boat
It's going six hundred miles an hour
I know but it's so big
and there's no road
So you don't really see anything and it's not like clouds are going
Yeah, but you can see attached to the wing is a giant jet
That's just a boat
But a boat engine, you know, you don't know if it's electrical, you know what I'm saying, you know
You know, it's you know, it's or it could be a high pitch, you know a high pitch one, you know
Or something like a good
No, dude, I was blown away by a 32. I thought at least they would go like a like 70 like a car
Yeah, no wonder you need basketballs and helicopters and fucking movies
You're gonna be on the fucking boat for the rest of your life. Oh, we're gonna go to new jersey
Okay, I'll see you in a week then the people are like, yo, I'm gonna sail around the world. What the fuck
That idea to me now sounds so insane. You're gonna sail around the world. That's going to take your life
Yeah, the world is huge
First of all, if I was gonna ever do anything around the world sailing is probably on the lowest
Part of this fucking totem pole is buried under the ground
You're gonna tell me that I'm gonna have to depend on winds
And the speed and have to drive this thing just so I can go to fucking Turks and Caicos
No way, there's just no way I'd get on a boat and I do like a
quote-unquote sailing with an engine for
Maximum a week and even then on the sixth and seventh day
I would probably have a connexion and you know, there would have to be doctors involved, but
Just wind
Nautical people are weird
Dude, yes
Like ocean people like like they're just they're weird. They're weird
Like for you to like be like, yo, like I just want to like everything's like sailing or like boating
Or like being on the water. I'm like, dude, you're not a fucking fish
I don't want to see you go spear diving. I don't want to see you do any of this shit that is just
Not necessary people who reason we built wheels and planes is so you didn't have to go on a fucking boat
Also people who just carry like a compass. I'm like if the girl of my dreams
We're sitting on my couch. She pulls out a compass. I'm like get the fuck
Out like I don't know where west is that's a thing. No, I don't I have no idea or north
And I every time I look up in the sky. I'm like, that's a north star and then I'm like, wait
I don't know where shit is just 55 north star
But I like not knowing where shit is, you know, and if you know where stuff is and you have a compass to double check
Go data pirate then. Okay. Yeah, because it's not going to be me
I would only travel with two people who would have to be will ferrell as the old prospector and then uh
And then captain jack sparrow. That's the only way you can get me on a fucking boat
I also just don't understand why people are like
Oh, dude sailing's dope. It's like, yo, we built engines so we don't have to do that
Like that would be like saying dude, we built titanium birds that fly at 600 miles an hour
Don't tell me you want to take the scenic route and it's beautiful the fuck the ocean is the ocean
I'm looking at it right now. It's beautiful for 25 seconds and then there's it becomes scary
There's nothing there. What about those boats that you just like hang on and then the the fucking things like
Like
What is that like side sailing? What the fuck a parasailing or is parasailing when you're an asshole and
You have to run on the beach for like a couple seconds to jump. What's that shit? Yeah, that's parasailing
That's it's dumb too. I've done that though. I haven't done it. I'm scared
I would do it. I tried to do it one time
When I was in Miami, I was on the beach and I saw people doing it
I'm like, yo, we should do that and they were like, yo, you've had a ton to drink and I was like
We should probably should wait a little bit before we go, but we didn't go. Yeah, you're not driving the boat
Yeah, I mean you want to be a little coherent just in case one of those wires snap and you're you know, you're plummeting towards
See would you go would you go hang gliding? Are you fucking insane?
Hang gliding
There's some fucking new Zealander just like tied to my back. He's like, oh, man. You're gonna fucking get off that
It's fucking it takes like fucking kick your feet, right?
Kick your feet, right
Jump up
Dude, well, I'm gonna run to the end this fucking clip. Yeah
I'm gonna jump us off and now we're fucking hang gliding. I'm good, dude. I'm so good on that
I because I'm just scared like, yeah, hey, man. How about like a jet stream or something coming just knocking us on our anuses
Also, I don't like when you're on like terrifying things and people are like you got to put your hands out or put your hands up
I'm like, let me be terrified and close to myself. Yeah
Yeah, I'm not like you ever see like the skydiving videos when the people are like this and they're like the people on the back of them are always like
Yeah, and like they're trying to like take their arms off of their parachutes and be like, yeah, like do this
I'm like, dude. I'm not risking my life to shaka, bro
to
Or fucking a fucking pin on this thing
That's like on a roller coaster like after you get off a roller coaster and you go look at the picture of yourself like on it
And then your brother goes you need to put your hands up you pussy. I'm like I had fun. I was there. I was on the same train
Is there anything scarier than when you're on a fucking ride?
And the thing that locks you in but you feel your ass lift up off of the fucking thing
You're like, I'm leaving this train. I'm like, I'm someone hit the eject button on me and I'm gonna fucking die now. Yeah
It's terrifying. It's terrifying
But I'm the type of dude. Did you ever see I'm gonna do scary shit
But there's just some things I won't do hang gliding is one of them
Hang gliding is is ridiculous. There's not even anything to protect you like where we gonna we're gonna land like a bird
Like what what are we doing? Where are we flying? These are all white things. Yeah
Like those people that jump off and like base jump and like squirrel suits like what are you doing?
I made that and was like, I'll test it
I hate that and then it's also like there's always like russian dudes like
Climbing up cranes and shit and hanging off of them at one hand with to like deep like russian reps like look at this
And they're like hanging off the fucking side of a building like acting like they're walking on air
I'm like, dude, what do you do? Yeah, why are what is with like how bored is it in russia?
How bored are you? Is there nothing to do except climb buildings and cranes?
It's unbelievable to me. It drives me fucking crazy because a part of me is a little jealous
But then a part of me is like, you know what? No, no, this shouldn't be this shouldn't be a thing. This shouldn't be a thing
There's climbing that should be things
Climbing isn't fun anymore. Okay. We're adults. Okay. We stay on the ground. That's what we do. We don't climb
Children climb you want to cry climb or a little tower in russia? That's great, but I'm looking at your child your child
Imagine walking and just be like, dude, I want to bomb that so bad
All right, dude, stay on the fucking ground and shut the fuck up. Yeah, stop climbing
You just gotta stop. Why are people so infatuated with flying? We can't fly. We do everything else. It's amazing
We don't need to fly and the scrolls through people
Flying's not enough for them. They're like, all right. Yeah, we're gonna fly off this mountain, right?
And we're gonna fly right through the woods and you're like
This dude's like dodging trees. I might do just go somewhere where it's open at least go to like, you know
Not only were you terrified before we're gonna go through the fucking beams of a fucking bridge
We're gonna ride right through. I'm like, dude. No, we're not
We're gonna go right down to the ground where my fucking parents are and I'm gonna say this was a great
Fucking birthday gift and hate them for the rest of my life. That's it. That's all we're doing
We're gonna fly through devil's valley
I don't know what we're doing
You know
We're just assuming that you want to make the left to dark side cave or you want to go straight, right?
Right, but dark side cave not doing it. Yeah, fuck that
The witches culture and we're like, yeah, what the fuck? What are these names?
You know, it's it's weird when you go to when you go to um, like mini golf places and it's like you want to play it reverse
It's like that's just a mini golf
That doesn't change anything. It's just you want to play the holes backwards. I'm like, no
It's like, dude. Does that mean that my ball starts in the hole?
Yeah, what are you talking about now? The first holes is over
That's another thing I hate about mini golf too is that they that the last hole your ball's gone
Yeah, it's a racket
It's a racket. It really is it really is and I hate when there's like two different ones. It's like, yo, we could do the pirate lane
Or we can go like the sea boat
Uh, the sea liner lane. I'm like, no, no, I want to do both dude. How do mini golf places
Stay open because oh this quarantine had to crush mini golf mini golf places are closing all around the world
Mini golf might be hit the hardest by this quarantine
Think about how much they've spent on building these elaborate things and then you go there and like, yeah, it's it's $15 to play
I'm like, how are you guys making out on this?
Yeah, I don't see how they make money
at all and
There's something about mini golf that I just love like it's like one of my favorites. I love it
especially when I when I kick their ass in it, um
but
I'd be but the thing about mini golf is that it makes you feel like you can actually play golf
For a split second for a split second. You're like, oh man, like I can actually play golf and uh
I mean, I'm not terrible at golf. I could drive the shit out of the ball, but it's
for me
This quarantine has not let me have any of like those that I wish this quarantine was like
All right now I could pick up hobbies that like involve a little bit of going outside
Like oh, I can go hit so like I can go to the range and like hit some balls
Like that'd be awesome. You should just order clubs and just hit balls into the water
Actually, no that'll kill dolphins or something, right?
Yeah, yeah, I think that's littering or something or like a whale can suck it into its blow hole
And then who knows what happens then?
I saw somebody uh said uh
A whale's heart valve is like the size of like
Like like a Cadillac Escalade
Or some shit somebody like said that it's like in the comments. It's a big fucking valve
That's a big old fucking valve
Do whales shit?
Yeah, yeah, I mean the ocean's full of of shit. Do they pee is the question
That's probably why the ocean's so fucking full. Wait
Do fish pee?
Or is it just poo? I know they I know part of them. Oh, I know they shit too, but I'm saying pee
Yeah, and they fart too fish is fart
Well, everyone's got fart
But I have to youtube a video of a whale taking a shit. Do what?
Do whales
pee
When it comes to pee production whales are world champs. Well, I guess they do pee
A single fin whale is thought to produce about 1000 liters, which is 260 gallons of urine a day
What 260 gallons of fucking piss the ocean you're swimming in whale piss
And that's why it's so salty
Yeah
Oh fucking piss enough to fill a 10 by six
Enough to fill a 10 by six kiddie pool
Oh
Man the hose isn't working. Oh, look at this. I think Joe could bring his whale over
Dude, look at this next next sentence whales combine their champion urination with deep dives and long migrations
Who the fuck wrote that?
Oh my god, I'm watching a whale take a shit
I'm watching guys takes a urine sample from a killer whale at sea world
Dude, you have to look up this video of this whale taking a shit
Wait, I'm watching a killer whale take a piss. Give me a second. Holy shit. That was fast
Dude
Oh, you're watching him piss. I'm watching him shit guy just walks over these people are taking a yeah
You're watching a shit. I'm watching a piss
But these these girls are taking a selfie in front of the whale and the whale's just pissed it into this cup
Wait, what kind of cup is it like a small cup like a yeah like the kind of cups that you you pour champagne into
Wait, what is it whale shit whale shitting? I typed in whale poop. Oh my god
Is this the one? Yeah
Varsh, she blows diver caught and whale poo nato
Is this the one that one just still photos if you go to humpback whale takes a poo in front of divers
This shit is gross
Okay, I'm on the humpback whale taking a shit
uh video
You go to go to like no no no a minute
and 30 a minute 30
We're at a minute 16. I kind of want to build suspense for this shit
Which one shits there's two whales here
This this thing taking a shit looks like a like a like a plain blue an engine
I hope it's not the bottom one because now
Oh
Ew, it's green
Yeah, dude. It's hovering. He's just shit clouds
Ew, that's like an old
alcoholic shit
Go to go to temp dude. This whale is not healthy dog. Yeah. No, this is sick. I know shit
Go to 233 and look at this fucking shit trail that this thing is leaving
Oh my god, look at that shit cloud
We're talking hundreds of feet of shit
That's pounds and pounds of shit
Oh, here we go shit and water looks so weird new video georgia aquarium beluga whale takes a dump
Oh, yeah, they take poops, dude. I think I've seen a beluga take a poop before
I just typed in beluga shit
It's it's beluga takes a dump god. Where's this dump, man? Where is georgia aquarium?
Yeah
Oh, I got it. It's around 26. Oh
Ew, and oh that is sprays and shit dust
It wags it around
It wipes it around it froths it and shits and immediately wafts
Now the other beluga whales are swimming through shit. Does it stinky? Does it stink?
Oh my god, it's the other one took a shit
This is it one time a day where everyone shits
It'll do yo go to 22. Oh my god. This actually this tank is ruined dude. There's shit everywhere. I can't see the whales anymore
If you go to two seconds go to no no no go to 21 seconds georgia aquarium beluga whale takes a dump right that's when you're on
Yeah, yeah
All right, put the playback speed at 0.75
Slow motion
Hold on watch where it comes out of
Okay, it comes out the front
Trying to find this shit and it looks like a solid piece of shit at first. Oh it coils
That's not it. Yeah moron
That's a fucking that's like a rope
That's it shit. That's not this shit. This shit comes out at 21 seconds
Play it from there. This shit comes out of its front and then turns into shit dust. He wafts it. No
No, what you're looking at that thing you're seeing in the front
I wish I could like all the way to the left, right? No, no, no, I'm not talking about that
I'm talking about the shit that comes out of the whale look at the whale's tail 22 seconds
24 oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no it comes out coiled
Oh my god
Why does this fucking whale shit looks like somebody just slid in the second base
Honestly, this whale shit looks like a pig tail
And then yeah, it comes out coiled and then they just beat it to shit
Yeah, a whale shits a coil. Okay, so just in case you guys are aware about a beluga whales
It shits a coil and then it just turns it into dust
Just starts beating it shit up. Do you ever take an old rug outside? That's dirty
Joe you have to let me send you did did I send you that picture of my poop? Yes, you did
Yeah, she did
That poop was outrageous
Yeah, that was a big poop. I'm not even gonna lie to you. It was a big poop
It was one of the longest poops. You know, it was bad. It was a submarine poop. So like the top of it was out
one piece
like a fucking Cuban cigar
But times fifth, you know, it was the most amazing shit I've ever taken in my life. Yeah, it was a fat cigar poop
Dude, it was huge. It was it's one of my like, I don't know why men take so much pride in big shits
What was in that poop? We're talking about like pop tart poop
Uh, yeah, that was probably the day after a little bum fear pop tarts
and uh
Because you know, you know the feeling when you're poop
You know, there's you want to take a good shit you get almost stands by a bump
You know, it's
When you're when you have to breathe in between and it's still in your bh
Yeah, and you know and you know at a certain point when you're shitting you're like
This one's long. So there's no way I'm pinching this
So you have like catching a fish. It's like just nice and easy
It's like just come on you start breathing because you're like I have to keep my asshole relaxed because if I pinch it
I'm going to ruin this
And then like when it does break like I lost them. Yeah
You gotta you gotta put your phone down like I can't be distracted. Let me focus
Yo, that shit was astronomical. I mean, I really wish I could show more people this poop
But not a lot of people want to see poop like like yeah, I didn't I asked you repeatedly not to send it and you sent it
Anyway
It was a feat. It was a feat. I looked over at this just blue because shit everywhere
It's gross
There there there is just something I I don't know what's wrong
with men
Um, maybe girls do this. I don't know. Tell me in the comments. I guess but
Why are we so infatuated?
with
duty
Like the size of our shit
We're gross
Like you you can't lie and say that you've never taken a picture of your shit and sent it to someone. Oh
So many times
You know, but like why are you like and then some people just don't want to be recipients of shit
Yeah, I mean, I don't but I like it's poop. Who gives a shit
Good one, dude. I'm on it today. Yeah, you are
Bump fear has done you well
I hate you're wearing it. Well, I don't want to come off rude and be like, yo, like I hate bums
But like right now I do I have a love hate with bums. I used to be a great
Bump hoarder. You were just a you were an advocate for the bums
Yeah, dude, and I still am and like I want to help people but this dude spit on my back
Like I was some salute
That's that's a hard thing to to come back from getting spit on, you know
I get it especially by a fucking bomb
During a pandemic
Pandemic bum spit
That's the worst kind that sounds like a fucking grunge band
What's up, everybody? We're fucking pandemic bum spit. Let's do this
Also, I love all music. I'm sorry guys, that's tough screamo you could keep that shit
Mike what the fuck is up denny's?
It just sounds like everyone's like speaking but like inward
Like when you talk outward, they're like
And you're like dude, this is not any type of
Oh singing
So there's been two things that I've uh been youtubeing just profusely
um
And it doesn't make any sense, but it's been catfish
and it's been
Crazy poker hands
What a fucking
Like and for some reason I'm just like oh man like he needs a nine on the river
Like and I'm just like what are you doing? You don't know how to fucking play poker. What are you talking about?
You don't know how to play poker?
No, I do but like not like to the level of fucking these guys got these like 13 time bracelet winners
Daniel and the grano. I'm like, all right cool
Guys got fucking bracelets going all the way up this fucking shit. It's like dude
And I'm like, yo, don't fold your arms. You're playing poker. Jesus a part a part of me
Was wanted to see have you guys ever interviewed a professional like poker player or a professional gambler on opl
no
That'd be kind of cool. We did interview many catfish
Oh, that was the next question. I wanted to ask you
Have you guys you guys just did an episode right where the catfish
Fell in love with the catfish anyway. Yes. Do you want to hear? So I've been watching so much catfish. None of that makes sense to me
I'm sorry. No, it doesn't
But listen, but listen to this this one was particularly
wild
So if you go to the episode you can go to youtube.com slash other people's lives. It's called
uh
I got engaged. I got engaged to my catfish
Yes
Yeah engaged my catfisher
YouTube.com slash other people lot other other people's lives, but in this episode my mind
A girl when she was 14
Was getting catfished, right?
So she thought she was talking to a boy
Who was 20 or something, right?
Not le I don't think that's legal
Uh, definitely not. Um, and
Then it ended up being a
Woman who was 22 years old. So now we lied about gender and age
So now there's a 22 year old woman
forming a relationship with a 14 year old
woman
illegally lezzy
and then
When they were when she became of age
they started dating
and uh
Got engaged at disney world
And then during the engagement
the the og catfisher
Decides that she wants to transition into a man
So it's a lot, but they're not together anymore. Um, spoiler alert
But it was just a whole yeah, it didn't work out just you know
I'm gonna say this and I don't know
People that get with like underage people they don't wait till they're legal. They fucked
Oh like tyga and Kylie Jenner
Yeah, yeah, they had sexual intercourse. They they seized
seized
Scissored. Ah, yes. Yeah, scissoring. It's like this. I know what it is
You think scissoring is cool if you're a lesbian
Fuck no, you don't think it's cool to just mash your post on another post not one bit scissoring is not cool
I don't know. I kind of think if I had a vagina and I was just
Mash it up against another vagina and like the pressure and like the
Kind of be dope. I don't know
No too much work
I mean, you know
Sex is work. It's a you know, we're here to build it sex is a job. We're here to work
Very true. Very true. So that's true
I gotta put it down for the scissoring. I don't know. I mean, it's probably not the greatest
Listen, I'm not bad. I'm saying you could probably you could put it down
You could probably scissor the shit out of somebody. Do you think really strong lesbians do standing 69?
Oh, yeah, hell yeah, dude
Dude, they pop that shit up like they're about the tombstone somebody through the canvas, brother
That's kind of that's fire
Yeah, dude
Yeah, dude
Um, imagine yo you were you were dating a girl, right?
And she was like just fucking yo like like I'm like a monster like china
Yeah, like china. So you were dating china r.i.p. Um, and you were like and she was like yo come here
I want to do standing 69. I want to hold you and fucking undertake her tomb stop style
While blowing while sucking your dick. Would you let her do it?
Probably yeah, probably for the story
I would do I would do it for the story. I mean, yeah
Dude, I would do it for the story, but it would never happen again because I would feel so no no no
Imagine just a woman holding you up
And just sucking your penis and then just throwing you on the couch
And then just throwing you on the couch after head first
Through the and then pinning you
And then doing this and rolling her eyes
For the one two three
Oh
I would do it too. Fuck it. All right. I gotta wrap this up because I have to piss like you would not fucking believe right now
Well, as long as it's not as much as a beluga whale
No, definitely not that many just maybe like a pint or something. Okay. Uh, all right. Where can they find you bud?
At daniela peoria on instagram and twitter, please go check out the stank podcast me and mr. Frank alvarez
Uh, I just call him frank. Uh, you call him frank
I go back and forth
Yeah, well me and mr. Frank alvarez, uh youtube.com slash the stank podcast
And check out our patreon patreon.com slash the stank podcast as
Vel
Uh, guys, you can find me at joe sanagato. Go check out the videos youtube.com slash joe sanagato if you haven't already
And uh, i'm gonna go take a piss
Patreon.com slash the baseman yard and go follow us on instagram at the baseman yard for a bunch of clips of the show
And that is all
See you guys next time