The Basement Yard - #302 - Getting Swallowed By A Whale

Episode Date: July 12, 2021

Frank & Joe debunk wether this man was actually swallowed by a whale or not. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard. Uh, hey Frank coming out of my cage Are you going emo because I thought you were just going like housewife or something. This is a housewife Well, yeah, this is what a housewife looks like you look like you remember that woman who you take Oslyn. Yeah Yeah, yeah, no, that's not what I'm going for. Can you do her impression again? Oh, I Have a he's a to them. She's the Octo mom No Octo mom had all the babies at the same time. This is John and Kate plus a John and Kate plus eight Got it, which big task big task. Let me tell you Dude, can I I didn't even know but John is good, you know, I knew they were like

I don't think they come out naturally if you have eight at the same time I was gonna say is that just kind of like when that's that's I believe they do a c-section and they're probably each like Two pounds three you gotta have all hands on deck that day. You need a couple, you know, you need it. Yeah, listen I nurse you got I saw I Saw what it was. Well, I had to part my hair, okay I saw what it was when there was just one baby coming out of one woman Mm-hmm. I don't know why there would be multiple women. Yeah, but like I saw the one baby eight women Bro, I saw the amount of people that were required

Like there was like the doctor that was doing the thing and the people up here and here and here and then there are people On the other side of the room that are like fucking prep in the stations There was like six or seven people you would need a whole floor if you were doing eight at the same time Yeah, that's just insane. That's a lot. And what happens to your body? I mean, how do you hold eight? You know what I'm saying? They're in there I mean there but my mom was big with my brothers. I Know that was too. That was just two and they were both wins. They were the twins. They were big babies. Yeah So, you know, you got to imagine how big it would be if you had eight

But then I think about like the afterwards like the the breast milk It's a ton of sucking. Well, you got to go form. Well, you have to form up because it's not enough breasts to go around But I don't know. Yeah, definitely not enough tits. Yeah, I mean unless she's a dog Could you hold on a sec? Wait, do dogs have eight tits or like six or seven nipples? They don't have seven I know it's in twos can Can they dogs? Humans can we like if I'm a human woman. Yeah, I can naturally breastfeed Could I get additional like nipples put into my already existing boob? Oh

I like that, you know, like yeah, like I got my nipple here What if I add like another here so you can feed another here so I can like triple up You know, I think you could pull off that kind of procedure. I know there's glands and stuff in there Yeah, but you can you could if we could make a penis of vagina. We can make a boob another nipple That's what I'm saying. Like that seems like making a Penis into a vagina or vice versa is seems like a way bigger task than just adding a nipple I would think so because you just need to you know, you just need to rewire the boob I'm not too familiar with the procedures or the science or the steady hand. Yes, you know because I will you ain't got it

Yeah, me neither. It's crazy. I will say the vagina like turning from a penis into a vagina I saw like a graphic of what they do I did too and honestly after watching like it was like a cartoon How-to basically how they do it and after watching and I was like, I don't think it's that hard Well, it's probably pretty difficult saying but it's like from what I recall. It's like just like peeling a banana Essentially, yes. Yeah, but you're also it's also like diffusing a bomb kind of too because it's like you have to connect the wires back You need to be careful which ones you snip cut the red wire. We're gonna have an explosion. Yeah, yeah big problem Mm-hmm, and then it's like you like roll it back and like pin it up Yeah, and then you just you have a vagina again, dude modern science is so incredible

We don't know what we're talking about. No, but I saw the video of it. It was very interesting I need to put my hair back. That's Your thing is backwards. Okay. Oh, yeah Modern science you're looking a little biblical right now for some reason. Do I yeah, that's pretty nice Like you look like you like you own a couple sheep and like I am a shepherd and like you know like an old Like Jesus pass like an apostle pass. I'm just like gifting mur to people. Yeah, what is mur by the way? I think it's like a metal. I thought it was like a dust It might be a dust some sort of dust. It's gotta be I mean it's valuable

Frankincense is like a frankincense is like a cool sounding dust. Oh, no, I thought that was like an oil What was it frankincense and myrrh frankincense and myrrh? I think frankincense is like a three wise man Yeah, one of them brought like you know like neat tidings. No one brought wine dude. I mean, it's a baby Yeah, if one of them brought wine people would be like, um, hold on. Yeah, but not for the baby I mean like for who for the parents Party parents God son of God son of God. We're gonna have a wine. I know we should have a party for the son of God I don't think they're party and they're boozing it up. That was that was technically the kids blood if they were bringing wine No, I think you have to like bless it for it to be the blood of Christ

Yeah, I don't know I was you know actually when I was making my communion That's the first time that I could have wine and where you pumped I was like yo by the drink this blood of Christ right now and it was and it was gross But I was also in third grade. I always wanted now big fan of the blood of Christ I always wanted like because I was baptized Greek Orthodox and anytime I would go to a church and they would say like come accept the Bucharest that I would always be like the Bucharest. Yeah, what is that the body of Christ? Oh, like the whole yeah, I got the book rest. So like it's like a little piece of bread. Yes. Yes. Yes. I It's a wheat

Product is that the name of it Bucharest? No, that's oh, oh my god. Are you talking about the Eucharist? The Bucharest? I don't know this stuff. I thought it was some Greek shit. What was it the Eucharist? The Eucharist. Oh, yeah No, I don't know. You said the Bucharest? I don't know man. You confused it like Eucharist and Budapest Put two in one. What are you doing? I'm sure Jesus went along with it. I thought he was talking about some Greek shit I don't know. I'm sure one point Jesus was in Budapest So maybe if from the Eucharist from Budapest would be the Bucharest He did a lot of walking so I'm assuming he passed by a lot

You know had a lot of sheep as well might have you know gotten some sheep Budapest. He was a shepherd. No No, Jesus the shepherd. He was a shepherd of hope of of Catholicism He was he was shepherding, you know, I don't know and I'm pretty sure we're going to hell for the way we're speaking about this right now I mean, I I went to ccd. I know I know, you know a one or two. Okay. So what who was Jesus? Son of God, son of God, I I know that they didn't booze it up that night, but I would have I know that he's the the Um the product of the immaculate conception. Is that correct? Yes, and not to be confused with the immaculate reception which Steelers and the immaculate Contraception which is it's a really cool condom. Yeah, I'm assuming it's out there

If it's not free marketing for you people immaculate contraception. Yeah. Yeah, I guess that's birth control It's kind of it's a form, you know form of birth control the best immaculate contraception though is abstinence Say no, ain't well. Well, that's not true. Some people get pregnant from anal. How does like bleed through the walls? I think so. I think I think the anal wall is permeable Is it like if you if you hit it enough if you hit it enough, I'm sure yeah It's like it's like listening music through the walls, you know Like you might not like toe tap, but then you want to hear the song when you buy a t-shirt. It's great But in ten years, you're like I gotta throw this out people I can like see through this now exactly, you know

There's no more elasticity the older you get the more fucked up your anal wall becomes yeah Well, also it depends on how much of a like a beating you put on there people I can get you get their butts beat Some people just have stronger walls than others. I guess I don't think it's the walls that forget fucked up It's like the sphincter muscle which that's where you get like the anal leakage and stuff like that I mean, yeah, I mean to the asshole's credit I think that the butt would be confused if it's like am I supposed to be closed but you keep opening me up I mean wouldn't you we live our whole lives just with this just you know fucking drawstring backpack asshole Yeah, and then like if you just keep opening it and opening it. It's obviously gonna become loose

Yes, exactly. I think that's the science because like I know it was a myth You know like remember when we were growing up and it'd be like oh my god. She took like three dicks. She's fucking loose Big myth. Yeah. Yeah created by big man big man to big man and big pharma And big porno big big plastic surgeon to in order to you know make women feel like they were being wrong Or they need to have some sort of both sexual partners Right or needed some sort of surgery to like tighten up. It's like not a thing not a thing now You can like throw some kegels in there. I don't really know what that is by the way I don't wanted to try that might be just like an exercise you Google kegel exercise right now

I is it just like do it sucking in and just letting loose. Yeah, it's kind of like trying to fart with it I don't think that's how it works at all. No, I think kegels are like Try to basically try to fart with your with your shit Trying to fart with your shit trying to fire your shit. Yeah, I I don't I don't know what that means Like you're trying to fart, but there's something there. No, like you don't even like try to like Fart like you're trying to like receive and also exit. I've never I could be honest with you about something Yeah, very honest. There's never been anything in this world that I've tried to receive through my ass Whether it be air or anything. So you've only been exiting. I've never sat like face down ass up and like tried to like

No, I can say confidently there have been times where I've jumped into bodies of water too loose and and I got it You know a good good morning. Whoa, how to do kegel exercises to get started. Okay, find the right muscles Okay, I would assume it's it's just not talking. Yep to identity To identify a pelvic floor muscles stop urination in midstream. You ever do that hurts I have not fun. I've peed in my car about like eight times over the last month So I've had to do that quite a bit Yeah, you did probably strongest hell now once you've identified your pelvic floor muscles You can do the exercises in any position although you might find it easiest to do them lying down

And how do you find your pelvic floor? Is it like, you know, do you have like just like knock around like a fucking watermelon? No, it's like a watermelon. I was gonna say you're trying to find the stud in the wall Careful No, like a what you know, they say like find a good watermelon you like knock on it And if it like if you hear it's like kind of sounds hollow. It's a good watermelon It's the first time I'm hearing this never done a watermelon trick. No, I'm a watermelon guy. I like watermelon But you don't buy it. There's watermelon in my fridge. It's not all water melon Did you buy a watermelon and cut it open? No, it was a car bought pre-packaged watermelon. Yeah. Yeah

I'm not I'm not judging you. I'm just saying you've never knocked on a watermelon to do Kegels Yep, imagine you were sitting on a marble on a marble I gotta be honest with you hold on if I sat on a marble that thing is gone. Yeah, that thing is going inside of me Yeah, so I'm terrified Imagine you're sitting on a marble. I thought they're gonna say a marble floor. I was like not just a straight hold You haven't talked I haven't like handled a marble in years. I would like to I yeah I I mean I was from what I remember when I was younger. I always wanted to eat marbles because they looked quite delicious. Yeah Imagine you were sitting on a marble and tighten your pelvic muscles as if you're lifting the marble

So try to pick up a marble with your stuff, dude, I remember when I was a kid I went to my cousin's house avoid holding your breath your turn You wait you sat on a marble. No, no, no, no, but they were playing it was like a party game They were playing where like you sit on a quarter And you try to pick up a quarter with your asshole and like duck walk it across and drop it in a bucket Time out you've never heard of that you went to your cousin's house Yes, and you guys were playing a game as a family where you're sitting on quarters. I was not I got there What and they were like do you want to play this this game? What do I call it?

I don't remember it might have just been like duck asshole or like quarter duck asshole. Yeah Pretty on the nose of the naming. Yeah, and I remember my cousin was like, oh We're playing this game. Do you want to play and I was like, what is it? It's like someone puts a quarter in your butt cheeks and like you have to like duck walk across the I think they were playing in like their driveway and you have to outside You guys were sitting on quarters. I was not doing this and Then you would have to duck walk and you know like drop the quarter into a bucket in order to get points I don't know that sounds like a difficult game. Yeah, it didn't I didn't play from what I remember

Maybe I did but no quarters going into my ass. Nothing going into my ass. Okay Wait, just so we're clear. Yeah, they just put the quarter in your ass. Yeah Wait, so you guys were just ass out stand up. No, okay. I'm saying this Was it bear ass? Oh, you were so someone like you're wearing shorts so cousins Right, let's say we're cousin and she had like her friend or neighbor over some shit regardless. Yeah, we're cousins, right? We damn well are and I get a quarter and I shove it into your ass That's how the game starts. Yes You're not shoving it like fucking like fingering me in the asshole with a with a how else do you get a quarter in there?

You just like place it in the crack Using your hands the crack not all the way deep in your fucking hole though Yeah, but still like I gotta I gotta I gotta my fingers are going to be consumed by your Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no make make go like this do what just like that. Give me your give me your fingers I'll put the just quarter right there Probably figured my ass, but I I you I stick it. I know I'm not like fucking like spreading you open My point is putting a quarter in it. It's the point is Difficult game to play with a cousin. Yes. Yes, it was

Where was this is in New York? It was in Long Island where all the fucking weird shit goes down cool. Yeah, nice I remember that quite well. Are these Colombian cousins or yeah? Good. Yes, they are nice And Yeah, I mean, I'm not gonna say her name. I feel was it fun. I don't think I played I would they have fun I would hope so Maybe this started some sort of like quarter and you know fetish or asshole play. Well, yeah I don't know. I've never followed or fetish. I've never followed up about it. That's good. You ever eat you ever put coins in your mouth Of course I have I

Remember those coins. Oh, I remember an elementary school We had if you remember we had those old fucking eye like lead and iron Handrails, do you remember those? Yeah. Yeah, and after we would go up the stairs I would smell my hands and just reeked of metal I think that you told me that and I thought it was like I also thought it was chicken and Wait, what I remember I would always because the chicken in elementary school Like had a very distinct medley smell. You thought the handrails smell like chicken. Yes, I didn't because they smelled like metal. Yes I'm not a bright kid. I mean you were playing quarter asshole games with your cousins. Yeah

And I remember I love that smell so much and I would like put a penny in my mouth Big mistake It was disgusting. We put a penny in your mouth because you love the smell of metal chicken. Oh, yeah 100% It's good What do you want me to do? Anything but those things we we started off hot. Yeah, we started off, you know a blast fuming and then we talked about Your borderline incestual Quarter trick. I never participated in shoving quarters in my cousin's ass. Well, that's a clip you come from

Put that on the record there it is but you you I Mean if it was a crime that happened you're a witness. I were no no I was a child You were an accessory. I was like eight years old take it fucking easy. I'm just saying all right I was not like I'm not saying that I'm saying had this been a murder You were there. You saw everything. Yeah, it was a murder Joey Yeah, and you told and someone told you about the rules. So you're just as guilty in this If there was a crime if there was a new law written tomorrow like hey Keep quarters and other you know form of currency away from people's buttholes. Yeah, I would I would have to talk to people

Well, it would be a cold case You know, it's just hearsay at this point in time There's no yeah, there's no actual witnesses. Did you when you were a kid when you got bloody noses? Did they tell you to put a quarter under your nose? What you never did that no, yeah when I was a kid and I would get bloody noses I remember my mom would tell me like put a quarter under your nose because like it gets cold and it like helps stop the bloody nose We had a lot of bloody quarters in my house. Why wouldn't you just have a nice cube? That's cold that that is but that makes a mess More of a mess

Okay Works out put a quarter under your nose. I've never heard that. Yeah, my mom was always like tilt your head back And I'm like well, I'm choking well then yeah, you just start swallowing your own blood Yeah, which he's used to get nosebleeds out of nowhere like a fucking coke head. I remember I Remember one time in particular. I think it was Dominic's 16th birthday Keith got a nosebleed and like just let it drip on his shirt And then just like went the whole day and night with just a bloody shirt and we were like Keith go home and change You're like, no, I'm fucking okay early 2000s. You can get away with that. Uh, yeah, and Keith definitely

Cuz yeah, he was a psychopath Keith had some blood to him and It's like when Keith wore a torn shirt for an entire weekend saying he didn't have other shirt I was like Keith you have a full bag of shirts. I just thought it looked cool Torn my shirt. Yeah, you know, I don't know what's going on with your hair right now, but do I look good I don't know. I kind of did it to look a little more like Chris Angel. Mine freak Why would you want to look like Chris Angel? Well, first of all, he's a multi-millionaire Magician, yeah, which don't we all want to be one? Magician a millionaire not a magician. Oh, yeah, you want to wait?

You want to be a magician? I would be a magician So you can be a fucking liar not they're not liars. They definitely are they're deceivers They tell you that they deceive they tell you that magic is real and then it's they just don't tell you it's fake No, they don't say it's real. They say Believe magic pisses me off magic pisses me off. I love magic. I can't I can't do it I love but the reason I brought it up is because I don't know if you heard Chris Angel has a restaurant Dude, we got to go there. It's in LA. I think or maybe Vegas. He's always in Vegas. Yeah, he's like a Vegas act There's like fucking just like mind-freak posters like

Yeah You do kind of look like it, right? Yeah, one time. Oh, I was with Danny in Times Square and we saw him What was he doing like in a block of ice? No, he was like I think he was like doing a show across the street from where we were Let me give you something and Danny of course ran across the street pretending to be like a fucking rabid fan Wait, which which Danny Danny Lopuri. Oh, I thought you were saying Emma Holton. No, that doesn't sound right No, no, he just ran over saying Chris Chris with his phone out and the guy's like

Really? Yeah, it's very strange. It's so weird dude. He's a fucking weirdo He'll be like yo I remember watching a video of him and it was like his new trick was like He'll like swallow gasoline and then like spit it up in like an hour in an hour dude And it was you know, it was the weirdest thing. It was like him and Woody Allen yikes, and he's like What I'm gonna do is I'm gonna swallow this kerosene And I'm gonna coat the lighting of my stomach and water so he like swallows a bunch of water and

It like coats the lining of the stomach and these swallows fucking kerosene because like it won't be toxic because everything's coated in water So then he's trying to like he spends like an hour like Just like trying to spit up kerosene and Woody Allen is like Can you get it out? I think eventually he was like And he spit up kerosene and like put it in like lit it on fire. He's like mind-free He's like floating or whatever. Yeah, he's like floating. He was like in water for like four days He reminds me of like Steven Tyler for some reason. Yeah, that's off. That doesn't that doesn't line up. They don't look the same No

No, they don't no Steven Tyler looks like he's been knock knock knock and on heaven's door I know it's a different band. Don't judge me. Yeah for quite some time. Yeah, and Chris Angel also looks like he's dying But like not like because of age or drugs just because like his body filled him. They're both. There's like Men that look like kind of like a like a old cigarette wielding woman They do look like they smoke a lot of cigarettes. You are not wrong Yeah, but now he's opening up restaurants That's kind of interesting too because I feel like if you get the order wrong he could just come out and be like Yeah, it's like I made it. Yeah. Oh

This wasn't cooked She's like, why is this on my menu? He's like You're like actually pay for that you come back like the waiter comes back to the table with your card and it's art It's already been paid. Yeah How the fuck did he do that? But what would you what would you guess is before the bill comes? It's already done. I took your card. Let me guess 50% gratuity Let me guess you want the eggs benedict. Yeah, I was gonna say that I knew it

But if you were to guess what the like what like the theme of the restaurant would be What would you say for Chris Angel mind freak bats? No? I think he's like a bat he would he's like a bat man. He'd be a bad boy. Yeah, he's not a bat man Well, no, he's not bad, but and then what would you say the name of it would be? the like Corner freak or something. I don't know the corner freak Actually sounds like it's funny because there's nothing that you could have like literally you physically could not have guessed

Dommies no, no, you it's called Cabel pool What's it called? Cabel pit You've said two different things. No Cabel pit Cabel pit Cabel pit pit CAL No CAB LP Cabel pit, how do you actually pronounce it? See, I don't know. Fuck if I know CAB L

P Cabel P Cal Cabel I have to look this up Mine freak magician dives into the restaurant business. Oh, yes CAB LP Cabel Cab Cabel Cabel poop and and obviously you see what it stands for No, it stands for Chris Angel breakfast lunch and pizza No, it doesn't

Are you serious Cabel? Cabel Chris Angel. How much is he worth 50 million dollars? I mean, he's the mine freak Half of that is probably stolen for people without them knowing. Yeah, because he does Are you doing? Yeah, well, what do you think he looks like a grand theft auto character? It's crazy. He seriously looks like he's straight out of jet set radio future jet the fuck is that you don't remember that game jet set radio I remember jet moto it came with the original Xbox and it was like you would like on rollerblades and you would like tag up the city Subway surfer something basically. Yeah, can't believe you don't remember that. It was a graffiti game. Yeah The fuck and it was like music in it and shit. You definitely know what it is

Did you look at the menu to this place? Cabel? I'll tell you right now with the menu for this place is I don't actually I don't think it's open yet damn You think people are gonna flock there? I think there's people in this country clearly that Go to Vegas and they're like we gotta see Chris Angel. I would I would say so I mean we went and we didn't well. Yeah, we were like, where's the boobs We definitely didn't do that Yeah, we didn't

Angels and his team plan to reopen the restaurant in July with dining services a walk-up window and takeout Breakfast items include Belgian waffles. Okay, cool French toast pancakes omelettes and breakfast sandwiches. Wow Got me on board. Yeah, well lunch features burgers sandwiches, and then it just takes a lot of calzones Burgers sandwiches and calzones calzones wrap salads and pizzas So and then they have like a hundred flavors of Italian ices with vodka. Oh, there's a cocktail called the mine freeze Duh, that's a good name. I mean this guy's on brand We'll also be part of a youth job program

Youth job. Yeah, so it's like for like kids working there aside from the fast casual food The restaurant will periodically convert into the magic room with entertainment from Angel and his friends makes sense Who's his friends? He has friends. I have no idea. I gotta use your bathroom real quick. I'm so sorry. Okay Yeah, I'm gonna do the ads anyway We're gonna do the ads Frank's bladder is not holding up. So that's that's what's going on here but This week we have a couple friends of the show. That's not my password Motherfucker. Oh, here we go

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I was good. So kind of piggybacking off of Chris Angel mind freak Obviously, how do you piggyback off that? Oh, well, I have a list of six celebrities here, and I want you to pitch me what you think that Here we go. Whoa. That's the mind freak. It's the mind freak. He got me He's working. I want you to pitch me what you think their restaurant would be themed and what the name would be You I'm surprised you think I'm this creative. I think you'll be Start off first. It's Gene Simmons lead singer the iconic Oh, yes, kiss. Yes. The tongue the tongue Probably just a tongue-based restaurant. It's like cow tongue. Oh, okay. You ever had cow tongue negative me too

I've never had that but I just only serving tongue actually I was watching alone the other day and a guy killed a musk ox, which I didn't know was an animal That sounds cool. Dude this guy shot it with an arrow and then stabbed it a bunch of times with a knife Is that on Netflix? I haven't seen that season. It's yeah, it's the new one. Oh that guy's sitting pretty He had he had fucking spoiler alert. I guess he had killed in Moscow. He had meat for a while, huh? Yeah, I'm not done with the season so I don't know what the hell goes on I watched one where the girl like emptied out of rabbits bowels and it was just shit Yeah, that shows heavy fuck like I love animals

But I'm also like, you know, I get it when you got to like kill things to like eat whatever out in the winter wilderness or whatever And they they cry a bunch of times in that show. Oh people love to cry on the show I'm sorry as they're cutting open a squirrel. Yeah, I mean listen squirrels kill them all But Gene Simmons so just serve in tongue I feel like the chairs need to like have like a tongue like in the crotch area Yeah, and it's like kind of cool feeling. I wouldn't I wouldn't have it like vibe We just have it like be not not vibrate. Come on. Just have it like be there It's a family restaurant

And then you know how like you go to like a Texas roadhouse and they make you sit on the saddle for like your birthday Yeah, sit on a on a tongue on like a tongue and you hold a tongue and it vibrates for your birthday We're really hammering home this time. So the whole thing's tongue tongue From head to toe. Yeah, what's the name? Tongue-in-cheek Don't put me in charge of this. Okay. Okay Britney Spears Well, I don't know if she's allowed to open up a thing. What? No, I ill free Britney first and foremost fucking thousand percent free Britney. That's my that's my girl

And by the way, Britney, I apologize because I absolutely did contribute to the whole like Britney's crazy thing in 2007. So I apologize Did you of course I did I don't really know I was more I thought like Chris Crocker was cool I was like, is this a guy joking? No, Chris Crocker was a little out there, too Yeah, I thought he was joking hindsight was on to something. Yeah, that's like no shardamas. That's exactly like no shardamas and I needed a gay porn Exactly like no shardamas. No shardamas and gay porn. I think so Oh, there's like the steel birds will crash into towers upon the people and I'm going to slurp this guy's cum Yeah, oh my god, pretty sure that was in the no shardamas book. Slurp is such a gross word. So Britney Spears It would be called

What's it all lower case it would just be called oops And what they would just get your order and every time you go back you're going like oops did it again Oops, you're here again. Oops. You're here again. That's that merch exactly. Oops. You're here again And all of the like waiters and waitresses have to talk like Britney Spears She does a lot of that yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then like have you seen like her current like videos where she's under the conservatorship and she's like Hi everyone and she talks like a fucking like Barbie doll. I haven't cuz they're like terrifying They it makes me I don't cuz I don't know what's going on there, you know, I don't know if there's if she's got I don't know

What was happening? I know that it's very strange. Yeah, it's a weird thing cuz it's like this is a clearly Seemingly competent woman's oh, I'm something is wrong. We just we don't we can't quite put our finger on it Yeah, and sometimes I feel like is like she's fucking around or she's serious and then it's like not about that just like in general Yeah, and then with this it's like a very just weird thing to Happen of like this is a very clearly very rich woman who? is seemingly competent, but apparently to the courts isn't

Allow to like have control of my life. Do you know she has to have an IUD in it? I Ud in there's not allowed to get pregnant. I I I mean What is going how is this even like I don't even know that yeah What a crazy world where the government decides that they can control women's bodies weird very weird Maybe it shouldn't be that way. I'm just saying yeah So what type of food is Brittany having? Anything at this point. Yes, what kind it comes I? Food comes on denim plates. There we go

Denim plate. Yeah, remember that denim suit she wore with JTT. Yeah, that's a different person Justin Timbertape Timberlake Timberlake. Yeah, JTB. Yeah What's B like Justin Tim Burr? Dwayne the Rock Johnson, this is an easy one the iron paradise. Yeah, the iron It's gonna be called the iron paradise all the food is gonna come on a 45 pound plate Yeah, exactly away 45 pounds and every waiter brings it to you and while they're doing like a Instagram fucking like video like Yeah, and the restaurant's only open at 3 a.m. 4 a.m. To 5 a.m. Like you want to be there you have to wake up with fucking

Determination yeah, and then it opens again at at 5 in the afternoon and it's all like cheat day meals It's like but you you can't order just like like a couple of waffles You have to order like 40 waffles 40 waffles with a single scoop of peanut butter Yeah, and then like just like a half a pound of fucking syrup Yeah, and then at 3 a.m. When you're like at the restaurant at the iron paradise They only serve like pounds and pounds of cod. Yeah, that's it And they don't have music playing they just have this sound of dumbbells crashing together at a gym All the all the waiters are wearing chains over their necks

Like actual chains like not like cool Yeah, no no not like small like like bangled like chains like legit like could pull a freighter with these yeah exactly Yeah, that was fucking great. Yeah, they'll battle on told you you were good. Yeah, I'm paradise Cardi B Oh I know is that it's only finger foods and everyone that eats there needs to wear really long fingernails It's oh yes, and they need to eat with like they need to eat wings with like fucking like two-inch fingernails on Hmm. I like that that would be good right that would and it'd be called Cardi beats Cardi B eats. Oh

I say I think are like Cardi beats. I was like they serve beats. Maybe I mean, that's not a that's not a Cardi B food beats Maybe she loves talking about her butthole. So maybe like what clues you out apple juice beats Apple juice anything wait she loves talking about her butthole She like always talks about her butthole. She talks about her like her post more I mean either the beats will do one to the one or the other. I don't know go to a Cardi B restaurant I would what would it be called? I mean Cardi Cardi Cardi B eats. Yeah, I like it Cardi beatery card. Oh, that doesn't sound right Cardi bakery

Okay, hey street. Okay. Okay. Yeah, it'll be called like Bodak eats. I don't know we're we're tired go the next one Quentin Tarantino Everything is cocaine And the end word and the end word and everyone is barefoot and it's served on plates with just feet. Yeah. Yeah Wait, what dude? If you never know like Quentin Tarantino has like a really public like obsession with feet foot fetish Yeah, does he dude first of all he I think it's been like discussed by him and then like any of his movies you watch There's always a form of bare feet in it Okay, like kill Bill. She's like trying to wiggle her toe

You know, there's you know, I don't think I've seen kill Bill when I was like a competent age. So ever No, like I may have seen it when I was like eight that's fair, you know like you should watch there They're both really good movies. Yeah, but yeah, that's Ooma, right? Ooma Thurman. Yeah I bumped into her in Manhattan once literally bumped into her. What'd you say? I just looked because she was huge. She's tall bro. She was I'm six foot She was like a like an inch and a half maybe two inches taller than me. Yeah, so Amazon. Is she healing or no? I didn't check her feet. Yeah, I mean big mistake. Quentin would have that's why I'm not Quentin But yeah, whatever you order just comes loaded with Quentin Tarantino

Google this but in the cartoon version of Snow White, he looks like the witch Yes, you know, yes, he does like the original Snow White. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely Mm-hmm. You ever heard him talk? It's just it's all in the hair, man. Like Yeah, he kind of sounds like a bit of a weasel sounds like a bee that's like flying back and forth quite talented though He could direct a movie. He could definitely direct a movie. Yeah, and the last one I have here I want to see if you can get it is Kevin Hart Only short stools it would cause

It would just be called like a heart restaurant or something everything's hard the heart of the city the heart Oh, that's good. The heart of the city. So good at this. Yeah, you are and like every every waiter and waitress are doing a Kevin Hart impression when they're taking your order. Let me Lot of snapping. Yeah. Yeah Which one this way I Think I think that would be legit heartbeat No, that's bad. Heart of the city is a good name. That was the last one Heart. Yeah, heart of the city. That was the last one. I have heard the city. That would be good. Yo speaking of city

I don't know why is it reminds me of city. I guess vice city, but I was that was vice city vice city like Grand Theft Auto Oh, like the other I think yesterday or two days ago, but they put out This statement for apparently the new Grand Theft Auto game because the last one came out in like 2013 mm-hmm Grand Theft Auto 5. Yeah, and There then they put out a statement. They're like Grand Theft Auto 6 isn't coming until 2025 so I Saw this tweet and I was fucking dying by

Zack Fox and he wrote the car sex better be squirting and farting. I want to hear every guck and gang Guck and gag squirting and farting. I mean, hey squirting and farting is one of the funniest things that is It's a really I think recently you and I have discussed this We have found humor in like seriously simple things to say squirting farting squirting and farting crap The other day I forgot what we were describing, but I said like oh, I was talking about like traffic And I was like that's a fucking big fat problem I'm so glad you reminded me of that like we just laughed about it for like five minutes bit Because it's just like I finally here if I try to get to Jersey at four o'clock big fat problem gonna have a big fat problem

Yeah, it's fucking hysterical and Big fat problem like just squirting and farting is just squirting far dude. It's a good one. Oh my god But it's so true, dude. I mean I understand that they're probably gonna make Because the last game they put out the map of the game was like It was like the whole five boroughs basically Well, that was four four was New York. Well, I'm saying like in comparison like size. It was like huge. Yeah They get ridiculous so so what but now it's like double the amount of time that it took to make that well Approaching a place in video games were like for some reason people feel like they need to put every part of your real life

Into a video game to make it feel cool. Do you remember in San Andreas? You can go work out. I'm like, I'm playing video games I don't want to exercise bro in fucking Grand Theft Auto 5 you can like go and bowl and you can go and shoot darts Why why the fuck would I want to do that when I could get a fucking Uzi and steal a plane It's like they just need to put this stuff in to just make it completely immersive and it's like Pointless, I mean hey knock off a year of the development time Because I don't want to fucking Joy-rock, you know, I don't want to take a cab like I think that was in one of the games, too Right, you can like hail a cab and actually get in I think you can do that in Grand Theft Auto 3

So like 2002 you were able to what why the fuck do I need to do that? Yeah But that's what I'm saying if they if they are I agree with the squirting and farting boy if they If they're making if it's taking that long Grand Theft Auto 6 to come out It better be like legitimately like the size of the whole state. Yeah, and I better be able to go into like a cave and fucking East bumble fuck and just finger pop a bear. Yeah. Yeah. Whoa I was like on board too quick. I didn't realize what you said. Well. Yeah. No, I where else I mean, that's the part that you want to be able to do because like it would be you can't you can't finger a bear in real life

I mean, I'm sure someone in russia has done it You're not in russia if joe sanagato if joseph Mussolini sanagato once from new york wants to finger pop a bear Then put it in a video game like that's what I'm saying I don't want to have to go to a bar and take a shot or like great little five You can get thrown out of a strip club like no one wants to do that

Yeah, I mean, I think one of the biggest things that I did in Grand Theft Auto 3 was definitely get sucked by a Hooker and you didn't even like see it. You just saw like the car shake and it's like, huh I know you actually It was in Grand Theft Auto 3 You stop by a hooker and then she like bends over and she like stands up real quick pens over again And then she gets in then the car shakes a little bit and then you lose 25 bucks And then she gets out and then you shoot her in the head. I think yeah Well, um, and then you get your money back your money back

You also get a little extra money too because she probably did that probably had a couple But looking back, I don't know why I thought it was so realistic because it's not like you're getting sucked that hard in a car And you're rocking back and forth Bro, if I was getting sucked to the point that the car was rocking this person is clearly trying to put on a show Yeah, and also like I'm not gonna have a penis after this and like you remember like watching I think it was San Andreas that had the big issue the the cup of coffee mission Where like you can have a cup of coffee and it like shows you that people having sex

And back then what you never heard of this. No, it was the uh san andreas And I think it was called the cup of coffee mission where like you can seduce someone and like it will cut to you fucking this person And it was a big issue because hillary clinton Hey, uh, I think we just triggered like a quarter of our audience Like like was like this is ridiculous and like it's graphic and then like you see I think if you saw it it was like like cj like So it was like trash it was fucking garbage sex and this one's gonna probably have like crazy sex

We're gonna see like veins on a penis or something or like vagina lips That's like Cup of coffee scene from san andreas. Why is it cup of coffee? Uh, I think I think that's just what it was called hot coffee hot coffee It was a mini game in san andreas Uh, it allows you to Have to fuck Here's a screenshot of it

A fully clothed nurse. Oh no, she's I'm sailor Can I see Jesus um Excitement there's an excitement bar. So you didn't see how excited you get Um, but yeah, this looks like a nurse I mean this ain't the time. I remember when I was a prepubescent boy And there's directions it says push up and down in rhythm

How many people you think learned how to have sex because of this game? Like they're just like the first time they're having sex. They're like l1 r1 l1 Yeah, no, I I that's that's kind of insane though as when you think about it It is fucking crazy That in 2002 they put out grand theft auto and like that game like there were so many children playing it where you just grab a gun And just level people on the street. Well, joey in a while joey It's kind of wild you would need to like get the fucking game purchased for you Way to go

Yeah, I know your parents would have to buy the game or like you would have to pay someone to buy it for you illegally But like you couldn't just be like, oh look, you know, look at the kids the kids It's like slow the fuck down You know like they need to get the game in the first place and and if you're a fucking responsible person you're able to See what they're playing or doing with their time I can't remember if it was you or me that probably me went to go buy it with our mom Not me Oh, so I think it was me when I went to go buy a grand theft auto my mom and the guy's like, are you sure?

I was like what the and then he's like, you know, there's like Look and he started rattling off like, you know killing people prostitution isn't it and I was like fuck this dude Well, you had it. Yeah, I Keith got it. I How I don't know Keith asked for things and he got them 90% of the time if I wanted to sleep over joey's house Uh, we wouldn't ask Keith would ask Keith asked undefeated undefeated Uh, I'd never had it. I got vice city in three when it was like re-released later But I remember going to your house and and you guys had it and I would play it with you guys

And we would like have to like play it quietly because we didn't want your dad finding out what we were doing Which was shooting people shooting hookers. Yeah Let's be honest. That's what we were doing. I do remember though at that time, you know, like 2003 2004 That's how I learned about the yakuza to be honest with you. Well, there you go. You're a better person now Well, I just more informed Well, better person for it. And the only reason why I know the word compilation is because of Bukaki borns not Bukaki. Well, Bukaki doesn't do it for me I was just gonna say way too much preview Bess and Frankie was was playing those like sex games on like newgrounds.com

Sex games. Oh, yeah, what's sex games? They were like games where it would be like Uh, oh like, you know, uh, do you want to a ask her to dinner or b? Ask her to come back and it and then it would like you'd be like alone It was basically like porn like interactive porn. It was interactive porn I remember that quite vividly as a young as a young man And that was your like choice of stroke. Maybe maybe I don't know what I took from it I I haven't seen those games in a while. Maybe if I cross-reference my current performance. Yeah with those games Could be something might be some connection synergy there. Um

But I now want to play Grand Theft Auto 5 Yeah, I wouldn't mind that You wouldn't or would no, I wouldn't uh big like in that game You got to get the cheat codes. You just have to yeah, you think I'm gonna like earn this I don't you think I really want to like go through a mission and take a machine gun off of someone. No, just give it to me I do maybe three missions And then I'm like fucking look up the codes My thing was I would always and I remember in five in particular. I would have like in college

I'd have like competitions with my friends We would start in the same spot and drive to the airport And like try to hijack a tank a jet and whoever can do it without dying the longest one Because like that's when you get like six stars. They send the fucking military after you and shit. It gets wild. Yeah That's a crazy game. I can't believe they like That game sold a hundred and I looked it up 145 million copies so far a lot think about What's the average copy of the game? $60 $60 for the game. Yeah, what's 140 million times 60?

Fucking 146 million times 60 145 million. I'm just changing the numbers one one four one four five times 60 is 8700 so wait what 145 times 60. Yeah Is 8700 now just add the six zeros Is that eight billion? It has to be it's gotta be like they made like billions of dollars or 80 billion. Maybe no, that can't be true. Maybe times one million

8.7 e to the nine it broke it. Oh no, I hate when that happens That oh here we go. Yeah, eight billion seven hundred million Dollars that's insane and that's just from the game sales now. Let's not talk about like the downloadable content They have like multiple heists and shit like they have like four dollars like you pay like ten dollars You get a new like dlc pack So they probably made like ten billion dollars off of this game. We should have made some video games. We fucked up Yeah, dude, that's all it was. We should have just went into video game making Yeah, you would be

Just about as rich as you are now so no difference. Yeah Dude also like there's so many like weird video games out there that like I don't know like fucking One time I was on I went on twitch and I was watching Mike stream Was it Mike or am I even Keith? But it was like they were a piece of bread Yeah, and it was like a piece of bread navigating through the world There's one where you're a duck

And it's just like you just like pick pocket people as it's like it's called untitled goose game I think And you just act as a duck And you're just a duck. You're just a duck There's some weird games out there. I'm telling you there's something for everyone We should get you back into the porn games Well back. I've never been new ground still a thing. I don't know. Let's check it out I've never played any of those porn games where it was like, you know

What you said take her home or go to dinner. It was like when I was a kid. I did I Haven't played them in a long long time. I never won on new grounds. I was going candy stand new grounds I would go to addicting games addicting games is another one addictive games mini clip That's another one. I remember that one games Sex games. I don't think they're on here anymore They're probably outlawed The children. Oh adult. There's like a button

To like check on like certain games They haven't like done by like rating I used to get fucking um Advertisements for games like that Or like when you when you go on like porn sites to like play this game, you won't last 10 seconds. And I'm like, what dude? Playing a video game. I'm not gonna last 10 seconds. Yeah, that ain't happening Yeah part of me once it was like really competitive and I'm like, I'm gonna fucking not come Indy apocalypse tycoon. There's a there's a butt for that one

Nice, there's a butt for that Yeah, I can't I maybe they don't exist anymore I'm sure if you look hard enough you can find it, but I don't care to look that hard Have you ever watched like cartoons fucking? No, I I was once shown Something like at the beginning of college so I was like, yo, you'll never believe what happened to the teen titans I was like, oh shit. Yeah, and they got me. I I I went through a very short Uh thing like I was talking about like three days. Maybe hentai. Is that what it's called?

It was like very like big titty anime like crazy. I don't see the dragon fucking I don't wait. Whoa. Yeah, like it's a little like it was like a little uh fucking Asian girls got like the biggest tits you've ever seen in your life And there's like a guy I just like a dragon that fucks her But like tit fucks her and you're like this is so heavy dragons of scales. That would be dangerous It was a it was a fleshy penis. That doesn't sound fun at all I mean they were having fun. I guess so if dragons were real would their penises would have to be as cool looking as them, right? Probably not to be honest dragons are pretty cool and also like

From what I've seen of animals their penises are not cool. Well, no no penis is really cool Period. Well, I think humans probably have like the coolest penises. We're biased Well, yeah, if I was a whale and I had a fucking eight foot dick. Yeah, but it just looks like a big like Like, you know chicken fat that you just cut off of a chicken Joey, it's kind of like that. I'll never be able to look at chicken fat the same You ruined chicken fat for me. Sorry I ruined chicken fat for you. No, I would I mean, you know, there's a penis Museum, I think it's an Iceland. No. Yes. Oh, yeah, we spoke about this a dick museum. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah

And like they just got dicks everywhere. Yeah, because like a dick's way the dicks the whale's dick Is a bone I believe and they actually have like this long ass bone That they have like I remember a wall and it might just be whale cock and it might just be whale cock I remember reading something by the way, I think we talked about this on a patreon episode Which you could check out patreon.com slash the basement yard um I think

I heard that like the tip of a of a human penis is shaped like a spade shovel So like it like seals the walls So like when it when the vagina of a vagina or but So when it gets in there When it gets in there, it like holds like and it and it you know does its thing. Yeah, it provides the seed Yes, it like makes sure no one gets out You know, like, you know, just make sure like it like closes the door behind it

Like everyone's staying here a plug of sorts bingo A drain stoppage. Yes, you know, yeah to make sure it's like it holds, you know, it holds the it holds itself That's interesting I'm fucking crazy Like the penis at one point might have just looked like just just like a pencil Yeah, yo, wow, I never really even thought of that. What does our penis look like? What doesn't the andorthalus penis look like? Yeah, because look at their faces. It was Disgusting a shit. Oh my god. Dirty dirty bro. What would happen if you just let pubes just go?

What's the longest pubes in the and like recorded They can oh, uh, I don't know. I've seen some with the longest fingernails, but never the longest pubes world's longest pubes at a certain point you got to tuck it into your shirt, right? The longest pubic hair in history was 28 inches. Huh? Wow, that's a long pubic hair. Can we see a picture? That's like this. That's like a big pubic hair. No, this isn't real Let me see That's not real. That's a front tail. That's not real. That could be real You get a nice like fucking armenian man

They're hairy, right? I think I think they are. I knew an Armenian kid. He had the hairiest arms in the world Really? Yeah. Was it that kid Arthur? Arthur You went to high school with him. Oh, no, no, no, no. No, he was Armenian though. Yeah, I think I'm sure I met someone from Armenia But no, this kid was in middle school Huh, I think his name is like alex or something. They had hairy ass arms. Really? Yeah Punched me in the face once

And he had hair. That's why you remember the hair. Well, yeah, I guess so. That's why pushing the blow I guess so. Yeah, scratch on your way on its way by some people are fucking hairy as hell Speaking of whale dicks Did you hear that there was a guy that got swallowed whole by a fucking whale? Yeah, like last week or two weeks ago or something Hello, you think you believe him? Yeah, I believe him. How do you get swallowed by a whale and lift it down the tail? You be a human in the water. This is why I tell you motherfuckers stay out of the fucking water Things in there could literally swallow you whole

Who knows if you're playing in a whale's backyard or not? Exactly. So stay the fuck out of the water What do you think it was like in there? Do you think it was like the movies where it's like you could see like the bones and it's well lit? If like, yeah, that's like graffiti. Someone made a fucking. Yeah, someone made a fire on its tongue I've been here for a while now. Dude, if I get swallowed by a whale First of all, you don't like there's no like stomach acids or something. I think it's big ass tongue I think I'll float float I think it's in I think it's like in there

How'd he get out through the mouth or he got no shit the guy said he spit him out The guy said that the whale breached and then he was just like No way and he said that He said he spit him out. He's like I had a couple bruises, but no broken bones. Thankfully This is bullshit, bro, and it happened like close. Did anyone see that? Uh, I don't know if anyone saw it This is a sea myth. This is an urban legend. I believe this man swallowed by a whale I didn't even know whales could spit. Of course they can Uh, uh lobster diver in cape cod. He was uh says a humpback whale scooped him up and then spat him out

He escaped a relatively unscathed after being swallowed by a humpback whale and a biblical sounding encounter That whale experts described as rare but plausible What what uh, how long was he in there? Michael Packard 56 said in local interviews and on social media I was in the closed mouth for about 30 to 40 seconds before he rose to the surface and spit me out Bro, that's a fucking long time Like you what do you do? Like you have to hold on to like something like if think about it Like if you swallow an ant

That ants get a fucking try to hold on to something, right? I don't know too many ants personally. I don't know how ambitious they are Guy was brought to the hospital by his uh by his uh crewmen and rushed and they rushed him ashore. Hold on Can you imagine that? Please help me. My friend's been swallowed by a whale. Yeah I'd like get the fuck out. I would I would be a little youtube prank. I'd be an apprehensive boy I would ask a lot of questions. Yeah, but I think this is fun

This is just like you know how like you always hear so he was with people. Yeah, he was with his boys doing the lobster fishing Oh, okay. Um, no, I no, I don't believe this that this might be a marketing move Packard was 45 feet down in the water when he suddenly felt this huge bump and everything went dark He initially feared he'd been attacked by a shark And then I felt around and realized that there was no teeth and I had felt really no great pain Uh, and then I realized oh my god. I'm in a whale's mouth. I'm in a whale's mouth and he's trying to swallow me Packard was still wearing a scuba gear and breathing apparatus inside the whale's mouth. That's good Um, which he said was completely dark fearing he wouldn't make it out alive. He thought about his wife and sons

After about half a minute the whale rose to the surface and began shaking its head from side to side I got thrown in the air and landed in the water and I was free and I just floated there. I couldn't believe it I couldn't believe I got out of that That's fucking wild bro He's fucking kidding me crewman uh, Josiah Mayo

Biblical name. Oh, yeah Said he saw the whale burst to the surface and tossed Packard back into the sea Wow Oh, man, that's fucking awesome. I mean, what's scary Dude, no part of me wants to be swallowed by a whale if you're gonna be swallowed by anything I mean the only thing you could be swallowed by is a whale, but like what animal would you want to get swallowed whole by? I wouldn't like a dog. It'd be cute No, it'd be nice in there the smell of dogs mouth. Well, apparently it's like sterile in there

Like it's better than the fucking Lennox Hill hospital People are always like, oh you I remember I was told when I was a kid like yo, you have a cut and have a dog lick it Yeah, I don't know how much this Dogs I watched my dog growing up eat a fucking condom that it found a condom a condom a condom a jimmy contraceptive No, man. I don't know Good for him because I feel like if I got swallowed by a whale I'd be like, well This is it. I would just probably slide right in

I'd be like, well, where am I going? Yeah, the acid would get you. Yeah That would suck dude. Can you imagine? But I feel like I can make Whales throw up, right? I would just tickle the back of this is a lot of tongue Just like punch on it's fucking what's it called uvula or whatever. Yeah, and just fucking like do you know why I know what that is? Why osmosis jones? Good movie. That's the only reason why I know what that is not enough people talk about that That movie's also disgusting as shit. Yeah, it's about like Spit it's like by sneezing in someone's mouth or something. It's like, um

Well, bill Murray's just like a disgusting freak and like inside his body is like, you know A pill he's got like a fever and shit and it's like chris rock is like a white blood cell like detective Yeah, it's a weird weird movie But I like it. I liked it too. I did too. It taught me a lot. It taught me about the uvula on hbo max You can go watch it. Oh wait. Why do you know that? Because myles watched it. Oh, yeah Little science lesson a little bit of a science lesson for him little health stuff. Well, he loves that stuff I can't tell you how many times his kid is watching videos like he while he googled the other day How mosquitoes work?

Kids just like work like they're like, what do they do to make their machinery? Yeah I mean those things are machines. Let's be honest. They just suck and fly suck in a lot though They suck and fly they suck a lot. I heard a myth that if a mosquito lands on you And it's like drinking your blood if you flex They'll explode. I could almost a hundred percent guarantee that that's bullshit. Yeah I think so too Because let's try to let's fill this room with mosquitoes And then see if it works

I wonder if you could die From enough mosquito bites. I don't know about enough mosquito bites But like if they're carrying some shit like malaria. No, I'm talking about just like straight up mosquito bites Bro, I knew a girl that got a mosquito bite when she was in Uganda and got cerebral malaria Bro, is she okay? I mean she she has cerebral malaria I mean she's alive as far as I know But like I remember like I had to report to a case on campus because remember I worked I worked at my college and she was like having like a seizure

It was fucking wild dude. Yeah, these mosquitoes, man. I'll fucking kill them I was just I was just thinking of like if you can confine like a hundred mosquitoes to this portion And they just like went to town. I what does your what happens to your arm? I'll tell you right now what would happen if it didn't kill me I'd kill myself because that fucking would suck it would itch a lot You ever like itch a mosquito bite so bad that it like oozes that like yellow like venom that they have no Fuck it sucks, dude. Are you one of those people that makes the X on it? Yeah Yeah, I will say I did find a cure for mosquito bites Becca found it. What well she had like heard of it like garlic

No, it's um Baking soda and water and you like put it on it like a paste and it like sucks the venom out and then it once it dries It's like gone Really, I swear to god Because I who loves to be scratched Would get a mosquito bite and be like, oh no Someone helped me and my fucking wife would be the poor soul that had to scratch it Yeah, so she was like I I figured this out. I found something and made it work

She also did like the gold key It's like you scratch it with a gold key and like the gold Stupid shit. Where'd you get a gold key? It's not really gold. It's like oh You know, I was like jeez. Just like the key to some fucking secret garden or something. She does she does have the key to my secret garden It's my balls. Yeah, I've seen that secret garden. It let me tell you not much of a secret anymore Well, uh, and not much of a garden. It's disgusting. Yeah, it's been, you know, let's put it like this It looks like Jurassic world after park. Yeah It's more of a secret cemetery just grown gross. Yeah, so um, but anyway, I think we could wrap this up

All right, okay. Where can they find you? F alvarez 8085 on twitter and then the frank alvarez on twitch and instagram Uh, go check me out on there come hang with me play some video games when I get on to twitch Usually mondays and tuesdays. Maybe I'll play some grand theft out of five. You never know. Maybe and then uh, I'm a competitor to movie trivia schmo down had my second match. Boom won that son of a bitch It's available now youtube go check out the movie trivia schmo down It's the fucking coolest place in the world for the mending of movie trivia and wwe. It's it's awesome So go check it out. Uh, yeah, and you guys go follow me at joe sanagato on all platforms

And uh, go follow the show at the base me yard on tiktok and instagram and our patreon patreon.com Slash the base me yard you get every episode a week ahead and you also get exclusive episodes every single friday And then I think by the time they get this that week's episode We're going to be doing our version of uh, like a parody of hot ones hot ones. Yeah, we're going to have a bunch of hot sauces So it's going to be not cool my my fucking hole already hurts. Yeah, my hole is going to be Screaming blood in anticipation. Nothing is touched my hole. Yeah, but like anticipating the hot sauces makes it hurt Um, yeah, that is all. See you guys next time