The Basement Yard - #335 - This Is Why Women Are Always Peeing Their Pants

Episode Date: February 28, 2022

Frank & Joe discuss the reason why all these women are peeing their pants. It's an epidemic of piss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Would you say what would you say? I'm not saying that again. What would you say? I'm not gonna say it again I'm not just say it. I said that I agree with what you said. Oh, don't don't I agree with what you your sentiments about Hispanic people I agree with what you said we're gross Fucking spin master general But you said you have to would you say about pussy though for real I Would never refer to female reproductive organs as a kitty cat Kid I will say that I said pussy. Yeah, he did say he said that pussy, but yeah I'll say this. Uh-huh. You know how like

Pussy people are like, yeah, I don't really like you know, it's grosser than that honestly when people refer to actual cats as pussy cats I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah that that seems more perverted like people that do that They're doing that because they want to be closer to vagina. Yeah, you're flying close to the summit that pussy cat Yeah, what where did we ever figure out where welcome back the face me by the way? I think it's because you go I think that's where So what so why so where did cock come from who looks at a penis and goes cock-cock-cock-cock-cock no no one So the weirdest cock It's a great question. We need to figure this out

I have solved the pussy riddle which is you know when you call cats you go pss pss and it sounds like That no, I think you're really really trying to find out there's gotta be one where it's not am I doing this I'm asking it for money What do you do with check me like what what happens like I don't think you know what you're doing This is me calling a cat. It's not me. Oh What you're doing with the vagina That's no, you're not I've never suited anyone really not really why I look like a fister. I do seem like an exploratory man

I have fisting energy you you have energy of like I'll do what you want and what if someone's just like yo fist fist me That's where I I honestly really I think so so you're not gonna if a woman comes up to you and says I want you to Fist me you're not gonna honor her request. I mean I I may honor it, but I wouldn't we always go to be more for her We always go to these two J. Lo or Jennifer Anderson. They say fist me Yeah, duh, but it's a big story. It's a big story, but like you know on the on average I would never just be like, yeah, I'm just gonna like That's a very aggressive thing to say that you want to get into like if if like you were talking with a partner and they're like Yeah, like what do you like and what do you like and you just like start with like yo?

I like to fist they're gonna be like who are like what's wrong with you? Are you a puppeteer? Yeah, I don't want to wear like you as a glove. I just want to have so well I don't think fisting like you're really getting much in you're getting your whole fist sometimes But like it that's a seasoned vet. You know how do you know that I'm saying like I presume That's a seasoned vet. I'm presuming. Yeah, I am presuming. Oh, why you ever fish someone. Oh No, but I'm sitting here, and I'm thinking like Frankie's wife's in the other room So we don't know if he's no line. She's in the other room

She's getting twisted Okay, I can't wait for this episode to come out. Yeah, we're probably Josh No, I like thinking about it like you can't just like guys Let's look think of guys but holes like you need to jump on hold on Okay, now you got it. I'm thinking close your eyes to give the biggest but hole you can think of or not Just a regular guy but hole. Yeah, why did you go for the biggest? Well? Because is what I'm getting to is like to get it to a certain, you know

Diameter is that what I'm looking for you'd like some diameter unit You want some diameter there? You need to work it like you need to miss like massage it open it kind of like You know introduce it a little bit. That's what but plugs are work it make it Work it stuff it stretch it and put your fist in it, you know Like you got to get it there same thing with I you know presumed like the fisting stuff Oh, yeah, you can just walk around punching butts. We're getting are you can't do that? I'm sure there are certain butts that are more susceptible to it. I swear to God guys I swear to God

This isn't like a planned segment that we're talking about right now, but it perfectly segues into One of the things that I did plan For this because the only one that I could think of is we're talking about my son and why no no no I'm showing fists in no no no no no we're talking about also. I told you about my dad sent me an email That's right. That's right. Your dad didn't send you an email So it kind of very normal way for people to communicate in 2022. Yeah, he sends he sends an email But it's for my birthday which is for is in eight days eight days And he sent it two days ago so the guys ahead of the game as of recording

This will come out on patreon the week of your birthday So make sure you wish Joey a happy birthday patreon.com slash the basement yard Remember these weekly episodes we can advance if you're a patron that next year you get exclusive episodes Friday morning start and end your week With the basement yard patreon.com slash the basement yard. Go ahead Wow get good man. Yeah, you are but my dad sent me an email I don't know why he sent it on Like the 15th and not my birthday. Okay, ten days later. Okay, this is so two days ago He sent this ten days before your birthday. Yeah, he's been working on this. It's a draft probably bro. You already know That this man has been working on this just because of the way it's written it the subject line is all caps by the way

All caps it's Joey Here is a wish and a warning for your birthday Wow, so starting off pretty hot mind you my dad sends these emails to my work email So the things that are around this are professional emails Yeah, and then all of a sudden a wish and a warning for your birthday Yes, can I guess what both of those are because if I were to give you a wish and a warning my wish would be Enjoy it. Mm-hmm. My warning would be Don't enjoy it too much. You're not you're no, okay?

It's a for real warning. Oh like be careful of the potholes or something close So this is it's a pretty long email that my dad sent me this is this is like for real. Okay? I don't can I look at what time he sent this even There's gotta be a time stamp on it. I want to look because that time it might be funny If it's outside of 8 a.m. Like before or after like 7 p.m. That's pretty wild Yeah, this strikes me it. Okay. What time was it? Oh, this is at 3 in the afternoon. Okay. Oh, okay. Somehow also strange. Okay

He wrote happy birthday in all caps with the most exclamation of course. Yeah, and then he wrote wow 30 years old I'm turning 30 turn it 30 You are now halfway to being much older much crankier and much more in quotations all caps Leaky what hold on hold on hold on leaky Yeah, you are now halfway to being much older much crankier and much more a much more of a leaky person So is that something that happens to your body the older you get you just leak fluids? I thought that just happened to like I'm glad you have questions because stars man. There's their details. Oh, oh, he explains leaky That's the whole thing

So your dad's birthday warning to you is that you're gonna leak. Yes, okay? Ever notice when a woman over 60 coughs sneezes or laughs. It's just their pants She crosses her legs. Yeah, even if she is standing up. I've heard this. I've never heard I have heard this Also ever notice how many 60 year old women you think I'm around bro. It's my mom, bro I I was told this by the woman in the other room Becca She let me know that like it's like normal for women to piss their pants like all women pee their pants And I'm like whoa, what and they're like, yeah, it's like us like drippy after pee pee No, but like apparently has something to do with like having babies like everything snaps back in a place except for like the thing

That helps you hold pee all on the inside on the inside. Yeah, what's it like one of the flaps it is It's like yes, because we have a flap. That's like wait. It's like it's like oh come go Pico Yeah, exactly, but then after like the door is a jar I think it's like this, you know, and it like normally stays. What are you doing? So like this is the penis Okay, obviously, that's the penis. Gotcha, and the flap is like this so it just stays there So it's like piss it blocks off the cum come it blocks off the piss, right? I think I think with women that right there as she's worn out. You can call the hardware stores you want They ain't gonna make no new plug. I don't really know. He goes

That's because she is peeing a little with men are asterisks. No, hold on Like a faucet with worn gaskets Is this real? Apparently I thought this only happened to guys that get then and forget about if you fart Do you what now a fart is just a fart over 60 a fart is a situation In quotes what yeah You fart and you find yourself frantically looking for a bathroom with your cheeks clenched tighter than a cute white boy Who is spending his first night in Rikers, which is a prison. Oh, yeah, by the way

Okay, let's break that down Cute white boy cute white boy. You're pretty cute white boy Yeah, so picture my first night in Rikers I have to have my butts I thought about this a quite a bit your butt would be clenched very tight It gets to the point where you don't leave the house without your keys your phone your wallet and your wipes Wait, what oh like the wipes are now a part of the routine because you have to wipe your butt dude gross Yeah, by the way, this is a birthday. Yeah, happy birthday. Your butt is gonna leak and what's leaking? We're halfway through by the way. No, no really. Yeah, okay

The only thing that gets easier is putting on your underwear because it slides on You no longer have to look for the fly hole because you know the yellow stain goes in the front and the brown stain goes in the back This is fucking repugnant Are you kidding me? This is abhorrent This guy's a psycho So get out there son and enjoy life to the fullest while you're still sealed up tighter than a wrapper on a condom Just beware in years to come. There may be some seepage Oh

Yeah, see bitch The dude knows how to make you a gag I'm not even fucking kidding. That's gonna make me gag see pitch That's not a good word. That's up there with discharge discharges whack anything that could be coming out of see pitch Maybe worse than that By the way that I'm fucking crying. I don't know if he's leaving like National treasure style clues. Yeah Letters in the middle of the sentence. These are the capital words in this whole email leaky situation

Rikers wipes seepage dad L S R No If it's spelled out like Donald Trump under the stairs. Yeah deep state. They are here for me And then says well son that is my birthday wish with some future advice thrown in right now I have to go I just farted and forgot my wipes I'm very proud of you son. I love you and make God bless you. Happy birthday dad At least God is but God's blessing you but not with a tight, but yeah

No, God like gives you, you know, he he who giveth taketh yeah He giveth you life and wealth and happiness. He taketh bro, but strength. Yeah, all right He taketh and giveth that's what it is. Yeah, take it the wealth and happiness. He taketh What am I saying right now? I don't know just shut up No, but my dad he the guy's a psycho clearly I mean he wrote that whole thing to me I think that's a quite beautiful way of your dad showing that he cares It's like he wants to prepare you for the realities of the world instead of someone being like life is only gets better Your 30s are the most beautiful. He's letting you know like bro

You're halfway to being like basically pissing from your butt every day. Yeah, like which you're just gonna seep You're just I mean it's gonna be seepage. I gotta say I at one point was there Wait, you all you seeped I seeped when I had that that softball size infection in your I hope you're not eating guys Yeah, where was the infection again? Right in there my perineum, which is your gooch Like you know next-door neighbors like it moved in it was a tenant to say asshole asshole. Yeah Yeah, and I had to put go I had to pack the area with gauze because it would just leak all the time Right, so like I couldn't wear khakis for like a year and a half because they would just get soaked. Oh my god How can you live without wearing khakis? Well, I was working at Target and

What could you wear then a diaper? I had to wear dark brown Are you allowed? Little bit. I was a target bad boy. Oh, you know, oh red and khaki. What's up red and Brown yeah, and then like Frank. What's going on? He's like, I'm seeping out of my asshole Yeah, well, I didn't say that but there were times where it was bad I'm sorry if this is grossing at anyone, but I can kind of get that. I don't seep anymore I thank God, but like imagine imagine every day being like afraid of like your butt just like just dripping My sister's like super pregnant right now and whenever she sneezes, it's a wrap. Yeah, well piss

I hear this all the time like I remember Becca and I she was saying she was like Women like can't hold it in because they pee and I don't know if it has to do with pregnancy I won't I'm not gonna call and figure out. I'm just gonna pretend like I know Yeah But like I think like if I go out there and scare her or she laughs too hard. She'll piss her pants I never understood that, you know, like I've never been like she doesn't piss her pants Nice, you're busy in my time. No Peeing your pants. Have you ever done that from being scared or like funny?

I've never been laughing and being like, oh my god. I'm going to know I don't think I have I'll tell you the times I have to pee the hardest is when I was like playing hide-and-seek. Yeah when I'm like Oh, someone could see me. I'm just like my body's like we're gonna throw when I was like I don't care. I could have pissed all day like a whole day of piss the moment I played manhunt and I was hiding It was I have to pee right now. I'm in a bush, bro You're done. That's what it makes no sense Like peeping Tom's how they were like able to like be like sneaky and I think I think the flapper was going toward the cump that one I know but like how that's a that's a peak

I never understood like voyeurism why people get off on that if I put my hand in a bush LP But if I was hiding in a bush, it's coming out. Well, I think it's because they're horny like you weren't horny playing manhunt No, I mean sometimes I guess you might have been sometimes it was you hide with a little woman when you hit with my girlfriend No, yeah, she broke up with me after that hiding session. You might have been horny for that. You want to go into what happened that night? Yeah, let's do it Frankie. I had to go home because I had a very specific time to be home He had a very specific time and Frankie with his new girlfriend. What's up? We were playing manhunt in the eighth grade and then the game kind of ended and we're like, all right, whatever 2005 And then I had to just wait on the sidewalk

With Keith and probably someone else and Frankie was just that you were just laying in the grass So it's like behind the houses and just like probably just tap kissing a lot. No, no, no So this is what happened. You're probably talking about like young GZ or something. It was around this time of the year definitely talking about you I was talking about the beef between Mike Jones and somebody else probably Mike Jones and the and the Oh my god Well, the yin-yang twins, bro

I forgot their name, of course the yin-yang twins. I said the east side boys And I was like, well little John and the east side boys probably in the beef somewhere east side boys I think it I don't know any any songs there Well, it was all little John and the east side boys. Were they in that song? I think if you listen to get low, they weren't in that song. You sure about that Well, how are they in the song? It's just all little John and like, you know, everyone I don't know. We'd have to listen to it again We were playing manhunt around this time of the year because it was oddly warm

I remember and we were playing in like the like Bay Terrace area. Wait, why we were playing manhunt It wasn't Bay Terrace, but it's a Bayside. I'm sorry What's the one by Elja? Garden Bay. Garden Bay. Sorry and She went to hide and you guys hid together and she came back and she was like very distant and then don't even I'm not saying I don't think you did anything and if you did hilarious But the next day it was Super Bowl Sunday and she hit me up and she was like check the tag on my Myspace You tell a story a thousand times because it's still relevant and it said I love I'm in love with your best friend And she's like we're done and I was like, oh shit, and I asked you and you're like, no

I was like, all right, you guess what bros before girls Before girls like that one. Yeah, no. Yeah, that was not something that happened But yeah, women women leak all the time and I don't think I've ever like I that's not true I've leaked for my pee pee of course every time I pee you shake you no matter how many times I shake that you know the other day I peed and I was shaking Bro, I think my dick plays tricks on me when it does it definitely does because when I pee my dick I like I want it once I it's like, oh, no, we're good. We're fine. No, nothing

Nothing, I swear to God and then I take a for real size pee in my pants Yeah, dude, they're if I'm not wearing underwear. It's all I could feel it on my ankle Why are you not wearing underwear because I'm at my house If it's like the morning, why am I wearing underwear to bed? Yes, I just wear like shorts or something. No, I don't do that. We're underwear to bed. Yeah, and Something on top of the underwear. Yeah, Frankie. That's psychotic. That's not psychotic. That's normal You double up to bed. I double up wherever I have to go. We gotta have a meeting I just want to make sure I'm just want to make sure I'm having everything, you know

Situated like in the sleep nothing happens. What's going to happen? I don't know But you just keep everything nice and protected and like cozy and warm protected We just want to make sure everything is like where it's supposed to be. What happened to you one day Have a tiny guy. Yeah, dude. I like I can't I wouldn't be able to sleep like that I can only sit with that if I'm like blackout drunk and I lay face down and I'm not sleeping on my shoes I could that's a gift of mine. I can sleep however. It doesn't really I can sleep like this right now I could go to sleep and I you know Um, what was I gonna say, I don't know you're fucking sleeping with fucking a full outfit on oh, there are times where like I hold on sorry

How weird was it back in the day? Where people would I think pajamas is psychotic by the way, let me just say that I think pajamas is crazy Unless you're a woman and you got like some like Soft, bro, they'd go to sleep in fucking night dresses Yeah, because I bet that I get no because as a man as a man You can walk around like in your you just like go to sleep in your boxers or something right and like no one's gonna Say anything, you know the children aren't gonna walk in like oh dad Miles does that to me when I sleep in boxes No, he's like you sleep in your underwear. I'm like, yeah

Oh, cuz he's got a whole outfit. He's got he's No for real so like the back of the day People would get home from work and wearing suits even if they were like a cashier or something Yeah, a suit suit everywhere and then they get home and then they put on Pants shirt and that hat the hat the hat the part that gets me and it's why we're Santa Claus Why the hat why the hat I get listen I get the top and the bottoms I really do like when for like Christmas now They're like right people buy them and stuff or they like wake up in their Christmas jammies. I we have multiple pairs

I don't get the hat the fucking little elf hat. What is why the elf hat? Like what is that doing? And like if it's meant to just keep your head warm why like the whole thing with like the ball that falls off to the side I don't get I get the I get the job I don't get the flap that I don't get I don't get the nightgowns. Oh, I get the flap I don't get the nightgowns. I remember when I first went away to college a family friend was like see a lot of women in their nightgowns I was like it's fucking 2010 wait what what is he a like bro and not like old England. Yeah, dude

What a weird question to ask not that like that old of a person. Have you seen a woman in her? Yeah, they were like oh when you're walking you're building other women out in their nightgowns And I was like no because the Civil War ended 200 years ago. Yeah, like what are we talking about? I don't get it's like you think I go to fucking school in the five points I think the fuck if it's something like legitimately nightgowns are Stupid and like full-on like get-ups for like bet like if like you can't go to sleep Jammies grow the fuck up. Come on. I still know people will sleep. Naked. I Haven't something in years. I have like I don't sleep naked like it's not my favorite to

Sleep naked it's uncomfortable Yeah, I don't I don't know. I don't really like it that much because I I can't wear like pants bro If you sleep naked and you piss there's no protection. That's raw piss all over the sheets Well, I'm counting on me just not pissing myself I feel like on a nightly occurrence like I get close to peeing But I don't I don't pee the bed anymore That stops it when I was like five six, okay But every now and then I'll dribble a little and just be like still got it in your bed. Oh

Like it doesn't get on to my bed It just like it like a little you know on to me and then I'm like that's how I know it's time to get up Oh, you have deep. We're being serious. I'm not fucking around wait. Hold on. Okay as a grown man you now Yeah button down watching stuff watch MVMT you're laying in bed friend of the show you're laying in bed and Peeing I'm not peeing, but I think I've said this before I in the morning No, I know when it's time to use the bathroom because I wait until like I almost pee myself I don't like just like people like oh, I kind of have to pee. I'm like, yo, I go when I like I know that it's like doomsday Like when the doomsday clock hits like midnight, that's when I'm like now

I'll pee same thing with bed like I'm in my dream and I know like I'm sleeping in my dream doing whatever I do you know getting abused by you and I'm like, okay, I know I have to pee but not that bad yet And then I'll go go go go go and then I'll like a little maybe like a little like And that's what I'm like now I now I know it's time to get up and pee Because I don't want to know I want to get up out of their dream and go pee So you don't you don't start peeing you don't go to the bathroom until you start peeing I don't go to the bathroom until it's like seeping out. Yeah

You see why there's something wrong with no I think it's a very efficient way of doing it to wait for the piss bro Would you know about a preemptive emptying well see but then you have to preemptive empty all the time preempty Hey, Frank, that's what we're all doing. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no No one's pissing themselves the most efficient the most efficient way to do is to wait until you get it all out at the same time And then you're done. Why pee like four times a day Why not just wait until it's like I'm gonna piss my pants and then you pee and you only do it two times a day So you don't piss yourself. Well, I don't piss myself either

But like but you dribble dribble if there's a dribble dribble, but dribble dribble is a part of life Joey dribble dribbles That's that's you can't avoid a dribble dribble. It doesn't have to be a part of life I wait until I'm gonna have a thick healthy stream and then I go let me ask you a question Go ahead. Do you only fill up your car when there's one mile to go on your gas tank? Yes You're living a weird life. I literally Yes, like I wait because on my car it has a little gauge and it says how many miles left until I run on a gas and It goes down to 12 miles and it starts to blink and then when I blink I'm like, all right, like I'll stop in like a couple minutes and that's when I fill it up

Okay, I wait it's the most efficient thing to do why because let me guess you don't let it get under half And then you fill it back up. No, I don't I don't do that But I definitely don't wait until it's like my car is like, please Definitely wait until it's screaming out help me. I also hate I know this is gonna sound stupid But I hate getting gas like it's such a stupid process To like plug your car in to just fill it up with this liquid. It's just stupid. I need an electric car That's what I need. Oh like that's not dumb You're pulling over to the side of the road and plugging it in like a microwave. No

No, but like if you charge it on like home, you don't need to charge it on the road Yeah, I remember you almost got an electric car I did and I remember we looked up like the stations and you were like, they're all over the place There was like four in LaGuardia airport. No where else. No, there was the one there They are all over the place, but just not around here the one that's closest here is on northern Boulevard Oh, that's so you can you imagine I would have to drive the northern Boulevard And I would have to sit there and just charge my car for like 15 minutes Yeah, well, maybe even longer than that those cars won't take like well if you do the overnight shit

Which I could probably I probably could have set up here, but I'm glad I didn't get that Yeah, they have it like kits now where you can just run it from your house But apparently it's like it like takes a lot of energy I don't know. I don't know bro. All right. Let's get to these heads So once we have here we have better help better helps crushing it on pretty much every episode. I would say better help This month better help online therapy wants to remind you to take care of your most important relationship the one you have with yourself Okay Whether it's hitting the gym making time for your haircut or even trying therapy

You are your greatest asset so invest the time and effort into yourself like you do for other people If you don't know what better help is by if you don't know after me reading that it is online therapy All right, so you can get in contact with the therapist and just under 48 hours And they will match you with the therapist if you want to switch to a different one because you're not feeling like it's a good fit You can do that very seamless over 2 million people have used better help online therapy And I have heard a lot of good things about it So definitely go check them out. If it's something you wanted to dive into I've been in therapy for like two years now And I think it's great. I think it's something that everyone should do and because this podcast is sponsored by better help

Basement yard listeners can get 10% off of their first month by going to better help comm slash basement yard That is better help comm slash a basement yard Go get your 10% off of your first month with better help today in our next one here is Is Life is short Okay, how do we make the most of our time on earth? How do we bring meaning to our lives work? And what is the best emoji to use when texting?

You know, we have a show called life is short on Wondery with Justin Long You know Justin Long. Absolutely. I know Justin Long. Justin Long's a good guy I don't know all that. Yeah, I mean No, but he chats with celebrities actors musicians artists and more about how they get the most out of life And honestly, this is very interesting to me because growing up like that was always something that I looked into like one of the things That I used to watch all the time on YouTube was like inside the actor studio Just these successful people whether they're actors or comedians or whatever and just finding out like How they go about life or how they got successful with their story is this reminds me of that in a way

And in all new episode Justin talks to actor Billy Zane shout out to him The hot guy Titanic still pretty hot about his long and sorry to Hollywood career We started with a small role and back to the future. I didn't even know that but definitely go check out the show It's called life is short with Justin Long on Apple podcast Amazon music Or you can listen ad-free by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app But yeah, go check it out called life is short Cool That's what we got. But yeah moving on. So one of the things that we were gonna start talking about was how I got verbally

It's you you said it was I got sonned you got some which for alright That's a New York term people that don't live in New York might not know what that means So Sonning is like when you make someone your child you clown you clown them like you make them like you're my son now Yeah, like I am your daddy. You're my son. So when someone gets sunned bring this to school with your friends All your friends about it. Yeah So Miles sonned me. Yeah, and he doesn't he's a really and I know I tell you these stories He's a very emotionally mature kid for being six almost seven

Mm-hmm. So like he is very good at hearing and reciprocating what he hears So, you know Beck and I try to talk to him like with like logic when we're talking to him And we also need to establish that we're the parents, right, you know, so I don't remember what the situation was But last week he we woke up and I Can't wait for this. We woke up. Oh, I was awake He was awake Ruby was awake Becca was sleeping So I didn't want him because he's fucking loud, bro kids. Don't get it. You're just so fucking loud Yeah, no volume. No, literally zero volume control and sometimes he just screams

Cool doesn't make sense sounds like that a lot louder got it and I was like dude like you got it stop Like and that's how I see I'm like, dude, come on Cut it out. Yeah, he looks at me. I straight face Without any hesitation without any like no like sarcasm or like trying to joke. No smirk. What do you say? He goes I Need you to get through your head He said I need you to get this through your head. Yes, and I go I'm gonna stop you right there. He said I

Yeah, hold on that is I'm picturing him like putting his hand on your shoulder go I need you to get this through your fucking even worse. It had even worse. He's sitting on the couch Sitting back legs cross in a Darth Vader robe Somehow worse and he's like I need you to get through your head and I stopped him. I was like, I Don't I don't know what's coming next. I don't care. Yeah, there's nothing. I need was he smoking a cigar He might have been he might have been with like a glass of sherry and just like a morning cigar The stupid fucking obviously was not there. I know but that would have been that's that would have been so fire I honestly if he would have said stupid fucking I would have lost my mind

You probably should have just listened to him at that point because I would have just been like, yeah, whatever you say Yep, that's that point. I just got to be like listen go ahead. Yeah, you know But like if he would it's like legit be like I need you to get this through your stupid fucking head I would be more impressed that I would be upset I would be like wow because he would not I don't know where he would have heard that from because I don't speak to Definitely don't speak to Becca like that. I don't speak to my kids like that either I don't think I speak to anyone like that. I need you to get this through your head But what was he saying though? I don't I stopped them. Oh, you didn't want to I cut him off

I said to him. I was like I'm gonna stop you right there. I do not care what you're going to say and how right you are. I Don't need to get anything through my head. I need you to get this through your fucking ugly and that's my stupid head Well, I I said to him I was like regardless of do you want to get your point across because we are like super big with him like bro He can explain his feelings really fucking well for a kid that age when I was that age and they'd be like what do you feel? I'd be like that that that was a moron. No, he can explain himself really well But in this situation too well, dude, and I just thought like what is some of the other ones? He said cuz he's got some good ones. He's got some other bangers. We're like

He's got some other bangers. I They're just very like He was very condescending. He was like And he was like laughing it off in a way bro He like will talk to us and I'll be like miles go dude last week Forgot what the context was but he said something along the line I said something along the lines are like miles. Look at me. Listen to what I'm saying. He went I Like I turned to Becca and I was like I need you to handle this because I don't look I get it

Like he's a kid. He's gonna be like, you know He's gonna be a kid like he's gonna he talks to a lot of people like that, bro Yeah, I like about like little kid things too. Like no, I've come home and talk about like like recess and he'll be like Oh, there was a girl what we were I was walking him home from school one day And there was a girl in his class. It was like, you know being a kid. She was like hi hi hi What The dog. Oh, he's got a chew toy. Yeah, that was me. I was like did I make that? No You know just being kids and he looks at her and he goes, can you please stop? I'm really going through a lot right now

It's like Just fucking the way that these kids is able to like express himself. I'm just I'm feeling very stressed I can you really just turn it down Lisa. It's cute that he has this like a little attitude But also like we try to we do our best to Work, you know, like make sure he's expressing himself. Well, but like he does but in this situation I was like, bro, don't I don't need to get anything through my head That's amazing. But and then I was thinking like I wasn't hit a lot as kids as a kid I think I was hit like maybe once or twice. Yeah, I don't think I was ever uh

Do you you heard that email? Yeah, that's an email from a guy that used to beat the dog shit out of you Yeah, yeah, yeah, I could sit here for hours and talk about that and I know it puts off a lot of people But honestly looking back. I'm so thankful because they're so funny. Yeah. Well, they're good stories. Maybe that's pregnant. Hey Olive branch, maybe That's not the best way to go about it But it happened and now that we're looking at hilarious. You gotta laugh about it. Absolutely really funny But I was thinking like if I had said that line to my dad I don't care what the context would have been my dad would have

Through me off of alchemy. He would have like beat me with like he would have undone like like those Those tables he's building in Connecticut. Yeah beat me with the wood rebuilt the table with my bones. Yeah The one time my dad lost this story. He actually told me about the other day when he called me Uh, because whenever he calls me now, I'll pick up the phone and go. Hey joey. He like loves it. He thinks it's hilarious But he's a hole No, but he started telling me that the reason why I started doing that was because like growing up my dad didn't like when I I used to have all my friends over on sunday to watch football and

My sister was there obviously and my mother was there So my dad's like you guys can't curse in front of women and whenever you come in the house. Yeah, that was yeah So he's like he's like you can't curse in front of women and then also when you come in the house If if he comes in the house and you're sitting down you have to stand up to say hi to him And he'll do the same for you, right? So it was like this weird things But also this guy was cursing like whatever one sec your dad never stood up when I entered the house If anything he went farther onto the floor. Yeah, he was just like this fuckers here But um

Uh, wait, why was I telling that story? There's a story like he told you like to stand up to not curse in front of women Friends are over on on football sunday a story that you told him the other day and oh, yes Yes, yes, so it was like this whole thing like my friends knew like that was the kind of person My dad was like whatever and he's like you were leaving the house one day and your friends were all there and uh He's like I was saying something to you. He's like and then he just turned around he went Joe would you just shut the fuck up you said that yeah, but I was joking and he knew I was joking

Oh Right, bro, because like sometimes I'll do that like to my mom like even now Yeah, it'd be like lids enough with you. I was like biz. Oh my god. Who's listening. Yeah. It's like who asked you I did that the other day to her like this. Who's even asking you? And she she hates when I do it, but it's so funny Um I've done something similar but I did a serious content I did that to my dad and he's like it was so funny because all of your friends kind of turned around like white

I'd like is he insane and my dad just lost it. He started laughing his ass off Um, so he brings that up all the time. He just brought it up the other day But that's why but if you if you were a six-year-old kid and you said to your dad you need to get through your head I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be here saying I got a suit is wouldn't exist My dad used to be pissed off when I would say the word suck in my house. I remember that I remember I called Barry bonds a scumbag and he like sat me down Why don't you go Barry bonds a scumbag scumbag berry buns? I guess so Uh, no, it was around like the time when like that pit the Yankees pitcher Corey Lytle died

And like something was going on with Barry bonds and and I remember being like this scumbag this scumbag And your dad was like shut the tv It was just like what and he goes in my house. You don't say scumbag and I was like I told you the dildo story, right? No, so I've told I may have told the story, but I want to clip it again. Anyway, so I'm gonna tell it Yeah, tell it in good one Years ago tell it in good one We'll start it again. Joey. What's the dildo story? Yeah

No, but when I was super young I called my sister a dildo at the top of my block And then by the time I got and she was like I'm gonna tell on you. I was like whatever you're a dildo I didn't really even you know, and then we where did you learn dildo? I don't know That's a very funny word. Yeah, but like where did you even learn that? I think I knew what it was but not what it was like used for So you knew that it was just a fake penis, but you didn't know what the fake penis was used for Yeah, but I was young enough that I could get away with not knowing like pretending like I didn't know No, if you know what it was you got to know what it's used on

No, but the reason why I say that's because I got home my dad immediately sat me down And so I was walking there was like sit down and I was like, oh fuck So my sister snitched on me and then she was and then he's like You called your sister a dildo That's how he talks and I was like yeah And he's like do you even know what that is? And I was like no and he goes

I've heard this story It's a rubber penis He said like Batman bro, and I had to conti- I couldn't laugh obviously I was also afraid if you laughed you might have bought a dildo. I'd beat you with it Yeah, he would turn me into one Dude I want to like one day like it's a rubber penis I want to call like one day call it like if you were to call your dad right now and ask him like

What would you have done if I said this to you? I would love to hear his response because your first of all don't do it because your dad will talk for 40 minutes It'll be the joe show not forget about it. Uh, but Yeah, that's a good one. I wish I I think I just like I didn't say like insults to my parents as much as I would say Things that were just like cold-hearted like when I told my dad like this isn't home anymore You know, oh my god, but uh, no, man If I I'm thinking like if I had said

because we don't we don't like Spank miles because That's just not the type of parents we are. Yeah, but like I could only imagine like if I said and like aren't think of like our parents generations, bro Our parents generations they were sneezing at dinner and they were getting beat to bloody pulps Yeah, my also You get beat at home and then you'd go to school and get a teacher for pizza

Yeah, the teachers beat the dog shit out of you too It's a weird teacher ever hit me. I would have blasted them, bro. I swear to god. I was you I was a small boy in elementary school I'm pretty sure I could have Whooped every teacher of ours except for schnitzer Now to beat that old bitch to fucking beat the brakes off her. Yeah, I would have beat the brakes off that old german woman I think she could I think she could have she could have beat us up. Let's go through the years We had miss singer. I well, I wasn't there for singer. So I had singer. She was a very gorgeous woman I probably would have never hit her de Philippi de Philippi

Beating the brakes off her old woman. Yeah, red hair. Fuck out of here. She's gone knock her block off Machio forget about it. I could have broke table topper. She's gone. She's going through the earth. Yeah, honestly, she would probably Well, she would probably put up a good fight, but at the end of the day She'd put up a good fight with her words But then as soon as it came to throwing bones, she would be out fourth grade. Well pogerman and third grade Oh, yeah, no pogerman. I would have sent into space Ah I was just can we clip this is beating up our elementary school teacher. Yeah, I know uh fourth grade fourth grade

I like no stiches. I wouldn't I wouldn't I wouldn't hit her. I would never I would never But she would probably have had the best chance. She was probably our youngest teacher She was definitely our youngest teacher and now she could beat up a fourth grader Kindest but if we had her two on one, she also had a super bald husband who might have beat the dog shit out of us May prop I mean definitely I mean, I only that's the only one of our teachers that I saw the husband. I was at the wedding Uh, and I can confirm he probably he was like like bro. We're talking about fourth graders He would have killed us. Are you kidding me? I want to fuck this up fifth grade schnitzer

Great schnitzer might have had a shot. No, I think she might have because she's been around the block No, bro. She's an old german woman. She's seen some shit front kicker like john jones. BAM knock her glasses off I'm just like picturing you kicking an old woman in the chest. What other teachers in that school? Uh, I think miss walkins would have beat the shit out of them. Miss walkins probably did beat the shit out of us We just forgot about it miss mons too. She was like six foot 40 Miss mons miss mons was tallest shit. What's she for us? Yeah, we were like push. We were pushing four feet barely barely Yeah All up most of our teachers. I think we could have beat up except for like a handful

There was like who was that got mr. Adams. This is our atoms would have killed us. Fuck is mr. Oh, no, that was 141. I think. Oh, no, mr. Adams. I remember miss out. Yeah. Yeah. No about pambukas That's our gym teacher pambukas, bro. I would have fucked him up. Yo, what's up? You old motherfucker Sorry, that's what are you saying? I'm getting really excited today. I wonder what pambukis doing now. Yeah, uh, I think I heard that he ain't doing so hot No, I mean he's holy shit now. He's gotta be he's gotta be in his 80s Yeah, he was in his you know late 50s 60s when we were there The guy knew how to pass a basketball. He did know how to make a bounce pass. I will say that Uh, but yeah, even though we were like little like fourth graders mean you together

We could have beat we could have beat the brakes off of anyone forget about if you had Dennis Might take that on the whole fucking school. Oh, oh Dennis alone could have beat everyone He basically did What are we doing? I never like understood like I think our generation was the first generation like we we didn't have like typical like bullies Like we were in that weird like before us. There were bullies after us It's like cyberbullying when we were there It was not really like bullying like i'm gonna see you. I'm gonna see you after school I'm gonna give you a knuckle sandwich if you don't give me your milk carton at lunch

Yeah, it's like we I don't think there was anyone who was like even bullied at our school I mean, they definitely were bullied just not in the like the way that it was described when we were kids Like there were no one being hung upside down or hung from bro People saying that they used to get hung from the flagpoles 35 40 feet tall flagpoles. Yeah, what was going on? What was going on dude naked also? When they're like, oh, they took him by his underwear and they put him on they fucking shimmy them up the flagpole It's like bro. That's that's murder almost like that's some serious shit Didn't happen to us. No, none of that ever happened even all in middle school

Middle school. There was some bullying middle school. There was Fights I don't I'm sure there was bullying like bullying existed. I don't want to be naive and say it wasn't there But it was not at like what people told us bullying was where it's like They're flipping a coin chewing a fucking, you know, toothpick with their with a leather jacket on going You know like pouring milk on someone's head. That shit didn't happen. Yeah, it didn't happen There was a lot of fights. There was only one kid that I know in middle school that got bullied one time Me and my friend you bullied him. We know we beat up these kids who bullied him because it was oh, you were the nice kid Yeah, I was don't believe it

But there was another time that in front of a lot of people I didn't do anything Well, because you were a little but it was because he was being an asshole But I also understand how this kid had like don't try to defend it that you were a bystander joe I was and today's oh my god. You would be cancelled to kingdom. It was actually the same kid So there's one kid I remember his name is Dimitri But these I heard that these kids threw his backpack out the window and I didn't even like these kids at the beginning First of all crazy. Yeah, that's wild. It was a big school. So throwing it out the window was like If someone was walking by they're dead. Yeah

Um, they threw his backpack out the window and I heard about that and someone told me because they know I hated these fucking kids And then after school they went to police officer joe. Yeah, and then after school it was me and my friend Mike and uh We saw them like throwing this kid in the snow and like throwing snow on us like No, bro. So we like fought these kids. But then there was another time Um in we were in gym class and the kid Dimitri was just talking shit to this kid Darnell that I was friends with And Darnell in front of everybody like the tea we were like in trouble So they were just sitting down the whole class and no one was saying a word

It was just quiet and then Darnell just started being like, yo, stop talking shit. Shut the fuck up like blah blah blah And then Dimitri said some shit about his mom or something and Darnell just got up and just walked over and he's like, oh He said something like i'm not playing with you. Mine. He was quiet If someone if someone says i'm not playing The game is over. Yeah, the game is over and he just fucking rocked him and I was like Well, can't stick up for him today. Speaking of there's actually a fight that we wanted to talk about today on our episode Oh, yes Segway boys segway boys segway segway segway bowling great segway. Um, yes, so there was a there was a fight

uh at Disney world happiest place on earth where where all the fights happen Disney world fights are just coming back now the golden corral one this one fights are making a comeback 2022 You're the fight remember like world saw our knockout people are fighting all the time. Yeah I'm kind of here for it. I remember when stealing bikes was really cool. Bro. I got my bike stolen like three times I got my bike stolen once. I never stole a bike though. I I think I took a bike But then like left it at the end of the street. Oh, so you stole you got cold feet. Yeah, I was a little boy Yeah, I don't think I ever stole a bike definitely have stolen scooters though as basketball's dude countless

Bro, Pete and I got pulled over This is like five years ago. Did I ever tell this story? Probably not on the podcast if I did don't care um, we when I lived in milford Pete came over and we got Hammered dude. I mean hammered and at the entrance to my building. There were two pink razor scooters Goodbye, bro. And when I say they were there like they were never touched from the moment I moved into the moment that Pete and I stole them They were there in the same position dust on them and everything So we were like, yo, let's take these pink scooters ride down this major route

And go to taco bell go to the drive-through of the taco bell taco was like eight miles away. Just want to make sure I say that We were riding Dude when I say hammered like blackout drunk nice and we got pulled over by the cops And they like came over and they're like did you guys steal the and we're fucking we're fucked up because you're on pink scooters Bro, we're fucked up and they're and Pete's like saying quiet So I'm doing most of the talking he would chime in but I said like no like we and he's like Where are these from? I told him where I lived and he's like if I go to that if I look at an apb If there are any pink missing scooters you guys are going to jail. I'm like, okay. Go look it up

I said like I know the guy who owns him and he's that bad we can bobbered him as long as we bring him You know, I'm fucking and he like looked at an apb on scooters by the way. Good luck. Yeah, bro come on and Yeah, he must have looked it up and then like he drove away and then came back and he's like, where are you guys going? I'm like, oh, we're going to talk about and he's like bro talk about he's like get in the car I'll bring you to wendy's so we got in this cop car and he drove us to wendy's never done that, but okay Why? I always thought he was tricking me. I don't care. Get in. What was gonna happen? What was gonna happen? We got he brought us to wendy's we ate and he brought us back

You ate with this guy. Yeah, we ate with the cop. Good for him. It was like a good time He's like in the middle of a burger like now can we stole this from an eight year old? No, I think he kept asking like yo you I was like bro Even if I was like we're putting them back like they're from my building and he was like all right He was super cool. Like his boys were like cool, too. Like other cop dudes were like rolling up. They were like, yeah What's up? You guys are white They gotta add people if I was alone, I would have been in trouble Bro if I was alone, I would have got fucking that he wouldn't even have pulled over

He would have hit me with the car this motherfucker Oh my god, that was fun. No, I was uh, I like I remember um But yeah, it's fucking people fighting uh bring it back fights at Disney world When you get to these guys forget the Disney world, uh, we have catalina crunch Which is fire by the way. I've been I actually this morning. I had the dark chocolate one It's really good. I had it the other day when I was here. It's better than the other one I forgot with the oh cinnamon toast that one's like good, but the dark chocolate. That dark chocolate was surprisingly delicious It's like I'm not gonna name another cereal. Why don't I do that? Okay?

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To try it out for free um But yeah, so this uh, this thing sisters arrested for drunken naked brawl Uh, that's a quite quite the headline. Yeah drunken brawl. Wow drunken naked brawl You're you're pushing boundaries there. Yeah, you're getting naked with your sister and fighting in disney world By the way, not the place you want to be naked. Oh, definitely I mean, I don't think there's really many places outside of your own home Or someone else's dwelling that you're comfortable with

Yeah, but there's two places that top the list and that's a school and a disney world disney is basically a school I would say it's just it's somehow worse. It's filled with child Yeah, but like they can hide they can hide the children in a school can't hide them in disney Yeah, you can't you can't they're everywhere um, but all right, so i'm reading the the uh The thing it's like a website reports a 29 and a 31 year old I know it it doesn't help It doesn't help get ready for this one the reports that the 29 and 30 year old women from you guessed it new jersey

Yeah, yeah got into a brawl that ended with them being naked and arrested Dude, I've never fought someone so hard that i'm naked bro. I've seen women fighter They're dirty bro women fight women or like yo, i'm gonna pull your tits out for this fight. Yeah women. Yo, they're wild That's the thing i've seen girl fights and they're fucking nuts if you're a guy This goes two ways or one way you get knocked out or you win. That's two Go try again. No, but if you're a guy and you get into a fight There's two ways it goes you get knocked out or you win for a woman It's like you have to be prepared

for Being naked you need to get your hair pulled out You're gonna get your tits pulled out your asshole your ass cracks gonna be out and ask crown Ask crack. Okay. Okay. Go ahead. Ask crown or dad the crown of your ass um And you could get fucked up too and scratch and scratch bro and pull and like they're filthy fighters They are really really tough fighters But like i've never been in a fight where i've never really been in many fights if i've been in like one or two

Yeah, and like didn't get naked. No, I remember you fought a little nick We didn't fight we just grabbed each other and like you were rolling around We wrestled each other to the ground and then you both got mad at me because I didn't break it up Yeah, dude. You should have fucking done something brah You know, so yeah, you should let your friends fight. I was like, I thought it would be helpful I remember after that being like, yeah, I stood up to myself That's fire. You gotta be proud of yourself. Um, I don't even remember what that's about to you We were filming something in st. Francis and I oh my god

And I said it should have went one way and he thought he should have went another and I was like, bro I do these with him all the time. Oh, you were being that guy. I was being that guy And uh, we ended up just like tussling a little bit damn dude videos That's how they started how it is with a fight. Sometimes you gotta fight your friends for this. Yep Um, but yeah, they uh, the two women started their night with dinner and drinks and disney springs an outdoor dining and entertainment complex at the resort As they waited for their taxi after they began to argue Uh, so they went from fucking love the time of their life. Yeah, let's go to dinner a couple drinks Probably a lot of drinks. Yeah, just to fight your sister, bro

Bro in disney, you already know they're having a couple margarites I don't know what the drinks of choice in disney is but I gotta imagine it's like, oh, can we have a whistling potion? No, bro. They're not all like that like when I went there I they serve it in like cauldrons that like fucking blink at you and shit I just had well one time I had um, I got an angry orchard beer, which I never drank since that day And then you drop a shot of fireball in it. Yeah, it's called like a fire apple or something an angry apple or something I don't know it sucks I had to chug it because they wouldn't allow me to go into the the lion king show without it with it

I should say and then I was pulled on I was part of the show. Yeah, I remember you told me that Yeah, and the the giraffe recognized me The giraffe there's a guy on stilts who was a giraffe and he was like joe. I was like, hey, and then he kept dancing What's up? Yeah mad high in the air these people are crazy stilts Um, the argument got physical physical when the older sister slapped the younger one and when police arrived The younger sister was only wearing her underwear and sandals Both of them were screaming and crying only wearing her underwear and so like not only they stripped her That's what i'm saying

Like not only did like you beat this person to being like a like a boob popping out as one thing The clothes are not on them anymore. So they're full naked. Yeah Once separated both sisters ran at each other slipped in the younger sister's vomit And then fell into the bushes while still fighting the security manager started the younger Oh, the security manager stated the younger sister ran a few feet away and took off her dress exposing her breasts Oh, so this was oh, she did a strategy. This was this wasn't like a great strategy This wasn't a byproduct of the fight. It was a thing about like this. You and I get into a fight. Yeah I'm dressed like this right easier to grab easier to grab I get naked harder to grab a lot harder and

You don't want to yeah because think about you fight if we wrestle and I'm like, you're fucking like Yeah, I'm getting hit guys get hit like, you know, they get put in a headlock and they're like Staring at the they're staring right at the penis. Yeah Um Staring down the barrel of a loaded gun. Yeah, they ran a few you ran a few feet away and took off her dress exposing her breasts Surely after they began to punch each other again the security manager and another cast member who witnessed the fight Were able to separate the two again until the off-duty deputies arrived on scene You know, it's a problem when they need to call fucking Buzz Lightyear to stop the fight

One of the cast members was like, hey, hey, hey, it's like woody do something about this But yeah, seriously, like you want like they're gonna like step in and be the voice of reason and it's just like Yeah, Elsa's coming over like guys just guys just let it go you know No, what do you think they were arguing about like if you're if it's like disney stuff though What if she came over and she was like bro star wars sucks like I'll swing on that I'll swing on you offend baby Yoda. You offend grogu. I'll be upset about that grogu. Yeah

Baby Yoda's name Joey. Oh, is it did you not watch mandalorian? I did but that was why I never paid attention to that grogu That name sucks Does Um, yeah, so drunken bitches in uh in new jersey. Oh, no in disney I'm gonna take I'm gonna take a fence What like they just so happen to be from jersey joey. Uh, no, we've met some trashy people from new york We've met some trashy people. They're they're everywhere. You don't know per capita per capita. What bitch? New jersey's worse. I don't know show me your fucking study

I have it in the next room. I bet you do. I bet you do Also, you sent me this thing which is kind of a psychotic. This is what disney's in the news this week. Yeah, uh, there's a new master plan That's not a good sounding thing. Yeah communities will let disney fans be part of disney all the time basically You can live at disney all year round Or near it. My understanding is that disney is making communities that are like disney themed So they're branded disney, so they're like over 55 communities like those retirement communities But like instead of being like sad themed they're themed after like fucking cinderella and like oh, I'll meet you on bippity boppity booplane You know, so they are like living in disney, which let's be honest

This is for the freaks out there those weirdo adult that have no kid disney fans Or that have kid and like torture They like torture the kid with disney. No, they they fucking I think bringing children to disney is torturous Really? Why do you say that bro? Because I've been there recently and like Just watching people with whole full families like becky johnny, please and they're they're like just it's like it's like trying to dog walk a bunch of birds Picture that get a bunch of pigeons The running wild pitches on leashes and then just try to walk them and they're just going in a bunch of I get it

I mean, we've been talking about it. I think you need to do disney Sorry tired I think you need to do disney with kids at least once or twice just to like get the experience But like I understand why it's basically like ridiculous But this on the other hand where these freaks can live in like basically disney world all the time Follow me here. We've agreed and we've discussed These adult disney fans that have no kids psychopaths, right

Yes, and just say it offend them. No, no, no because how much I'm I'm there's a caveat I Enjoy disney, right? Well, I enjoy more so universal than anything but and Animal kingdom's fire and I don't know that that would ever get old Like I could literally do that. What about Costco? Epcot, I'm sorry

Sorry I was like, I don't know. It's fine Costco's no Costco's great Costco, bro free samples. Remember that a dude r.i.p Yeah, that's true. COVID bro ruin free samples fucking took so much from us free samples spitting in each other's mouths and public a million people That too, um Uh, Epcot Epcot's cool. Oh, that is disney. Yeah, that's why I magic kingdom is what comes to mind when I think

A disney a magic kingdom fucking sucks. Why just us. Okay, it's like that's for children Okay, you know, there's nothing like I mean there is rides there, but it's not great It sucks animal kingdom. No fucking fire. You get to see monkeys. You get to go in the fucking thing There's a bunch of bars. There's like, you know, I'm saying like there's cool. Don't really care that much for it I like it. Um, and then let's see other one. Oh, Hollywood studios. That's where Star Wars is cool galaxy said. Yeah. Well, you gotta wait like 30 hours to get in now. It's ridiculous Probably but I will say I do enjoy it and I definitely think like I would be open to even like this summer coming up. I went last summer. I would go again this summer to universal

No, I I get it. I get the Epcot bro. I get the adults like it But I'm talking like and we know someone like this the people that like every year go twice a year. Yeah, that's a lot and like have like personalized mickey ears and shirts and shirts that say like I'm you know, like I don't you won't like me before my fucking coffee and it's like a picture of like a grumpy like, you know Elsa or something. Yeah. Well, also one thing that's kind of wild is I went to Epcot this past summer. I would say 65% of the entire park Or the people that are at the park are wearing matching shirts

Well, then they got to find them like that's that's that's like a thing to be like if we get, you know, separated Like people will wear shirts like they do it like in like Vegas. Remember, it's like bride tribe if you if lost Call nine one fun, you know, like some stupid shit But I think that if you do a bachelor party or a bachelorette party at disney Yikes Yeah, that to me is a lot. That's that's that is a big time lot. That's a lot big fat problem I would say all right So hear me out

We know like those people that are like super weirdo disney freaks where like, you know Like they have like the decal on their car says like their name in a disney font They have these places now where they can all live and be happy send them there Close the fucking gate close the gates close the gates lock them in kill them No, I would say just put a dome over it. Just put a dome over it and she's like fucking bibbidi boppidi Fuck you. You know, I don't know why I'm doing that. Yeah, where's bibbidi boppidi? And it's from Cinderella. I think I'm pretty sure I'm bippity boppity boo. Oh, yes

The white fairy. Yeah, um, you fucking by the way Huh, you fucking fucking what? No woman. No, no, I don't think so. I think it's an animated so Uh, I tend to draw the line at animated characters joey. Really? Yeah Rocks and goofy movie beautiful woman. Exactly. They were telling you at the time that Miles was taking pictures of Jessica Rabbit Taking pictures. Yeah. Yeah of like the tv. Well, yeah That's fire. She's got big tits She got something. Uh, she I mean she's got it all. She's got

But uh, no, I just think like this is funny because This sounds like an episode of black mirror where like you're stuck in like this like weird Like community where you have to be like dignified all the time And you can't be sad because you walk outside and there's fucking Mike Wazowski and sully smiling at you You know, and yeah, it's just kind of like it's it's unsettling. I think is the term I'm looking for It's kind of wild to think about like in these communities. I'm assuming like the article said there would be disney branded Bro, they're gonna be like disney like you can like you you'll be like, oh, you want a two bedroom in the star wars You know vicinity or do you want to go over to like, you know, uh, the the fucking James and the giant peach land?

Like it's just weird I mean I'm picturing like going to the supermarket and there's just like disney's shit everywhere Bro, yeah, all the ketchup is like purple. Yeah It's like you want ketchup like here you go and it's like just a picture of a fucking like a little red character like Winnie the Pooh on the heart and the jars of honey and shit like that And is there going to be is there going to be like these like characters like just out and about all over the streets? I would that that's what i'm saying like

All the policemen are stormtroopers. Yeah, honestly, that would be dope. Do you kind of also I just sold myself Kind of also terrifying because stormtroopers were They were nazis. Oh, yeah. Well, well, um, this would be fucking scary, bro Like you're not scared by this like being like the shit. Yeah, like the sheriff is Darth Vader Like I heard you broke the law last week. You stole a stop sign. There's a knock at your door like what's going on Fucking dark thing. Yeah, like that'd be not cool at all. That'd be fucking terrifying, dude We got a noise complaint get out of your Darth. Yeah, I don't know like I don't know about all this dude That's it's it's a bit much for me. Yeah, it's a lot for me. Honestly, uh communities living in that is a lot

Also, if you're gonna go to disney anyone out there, don't stay at their hotels Really? They're not that nice and they're insanely expensive The only thing is the the convenience of being right there But I'm telling you you can get a cheap airbnb with a pool And it'll be nice and it's very cheap. I'm gonna have to write these now We've been discussing possibly doing something dude. I want to go back. I want to go back to universal the fucking new, uh Jurassic park roller coaster coaster

Or something like that. Obviously bananas my a gave me whiplash. Did you just describe something as bananas? Bananas crazy crazy time turning 30. You're leaking out your butt. You're using the term bananas. It's bananas podcast bananas bananas Doesn't even mean anything. It means I think it's because like bananas are crazy dude. They look like dicks. They're yellow This is bananas. Um, but yeah, that's where we draw the line right there Are you gonna live in these fucking weirdo disney places? Are you gonna bring the children to disney? We want to we want to soon Cool, but we'll we'll see what happens. I'll let you know you can come along and and hate every second of it Yeah, I mean if we're going to have cut Fucking miles is going to have to get this through his head

But yeah, that might have to happen. It's like, uh Uncle joey's a little fucked up. Yeah, that's all right. He knows already. I've already warned Mexico I've already warned him that you're a drunk. Oh, okay. Good. Yeah, he knows but uh, yeah You can find me f alvers 8085 on twitter and uh the frank alvers on twitch and instagram Like I said earlier, go check out the patreon patreon.com slash the basement yard You get this weekly episode you get it a week before everybody else get in on the comments jokes and everything A week before everybody and then uh every friday morning 7 a.m. Like like clockwork, baby

You get exclusive episodes nobody else gets the opportunity to see on patreon for that second tier patreon.com slash dub basement yard Tell your friends about it. Yep, and uh, you can follow the show at the basement yard on tiktok and instagram and that is all See you guys next time