The Basement Yard - #340 - How Was This Allowed?!

Episode Date: April 4, 2022

Guys, times have changed.. but let's take a look back at some of the most insane things that used to be perfectly okay by societies standards. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the ba- Welcome back to the ba- How dare you? No, it's my show too now. Go ahead. You're wearing a kith shirt, so I'm allowed to do this one. Oh, what is yours? What is that?

Tennessee Rock Revival, baby. You got that little bit of Johnny Cash? Would you get that? Little bit. Honestly? No idea. You probably got it in a box of cereal. Probably not. I'm gonna tell you about the time my mom got me a t-shirt for my birthday.

I think I've told the story. The Puerto Rican one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she was like, it's Captain America. I was like, ma, Puerto Rico. Yeah. Even the tag said, viva Puerto Rico. And I was like, god damn.

Love you, mom. Great lady. Doesn't know Puerto Rico, though. Clearly doesn't. But to her defense, look at the current, the more recent, Captain America outfits from the Marvel movies. Star, the flags. It kind of looks like a bit of a Puerto Rican flag.

There's some similarities, but. A little bit. I don't think he's Captain Puerto Rico, but he does stand for it all. He does. He does. He does. Well, he's only Captain America. He's not protecting Europe.

Is Puerto Rico a state or a Commonwealth? It's a, I don't know what a Commonwealth is. Now we need to figure this out. I think it's like, you can chill with us, but you're not allowed to be our boy. You can sit at the lunch table, but you're not hanging out with us after school. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, yo, you can hang out with us at the park where you're not coming over. Yeah, exactly.

It's like, yo, at school, you're cool with Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh. But afterward, we don't know each other. I'll beat you up. Yeah, well, I don't think they'll beat him up. I think they're just like, yo, if you need our help, all right, we'll stick up for you. But I don't think, you're looking it up, aren't you? What is Puerto Rico? I just want to know what it is.

Did you just Google what is Puerto Rico? It's an island. Thank you. Yeah, it's a Commonwealth. Oh, no. Oh, officially, it's the Commonwealth of Puerto Rico. So what is that? Why does it call it a Commonwealth?

Unincorporated territory of the United States. So it's United States territory, but it's not incorporated in the 50 states. But why is that different from Hawaii and Alaska? Why did you say Hawaii like that? That's how people say it. Right, but that's not how you say it. I say it the way that it is supposed to be said. Hawaii?

Yeah, Hawaii. Yeah, I'm sure that is. Bro, if the rock says it that way, just shut your mouth and say it the way the rock says it. That's a fact. Because you don't want it to have to be on his bad side. Can you imagine getting into a fist fight with a rock? Bro, he would fucking take your fist and smash it in his hands. No, he wouldn't.

You don't think so? No, he probably would. He probably would fuck you up. But he recently was like, ah, we're here in the beautiful island of Hawaii? I get it, but also. Yeah, but he's like Samoan. Yeah, but that's different. I think the island of American Samoa is different.

But he frequents Hawaii. And I think he was raised in Hawaii, which, bro, that flight. 10 hours? Well, it's six to, I think it's 12. I think it's six to California and then six down. That's a big one. That sucks, dude. Yeah, dude.

That's like one of the reasons I haven't gone to Japan, because that flight, boy. That's even further. I think it's like the same distance, but just in a different way. No, it's definitely longer than 10 hours. No, no, no, I think it's like 12 hours. To Japan? No, it's not. Are you sure about that?

I'm pretty sure. Are you sure about that? Flight from New York to Japan. And how much is it? $1,200. A nonstop flight is 13 and a half hours. Yeah, it's 12 hours, OK. But that's a long time on a flight, dude.

Wait, this doesn't really make sense to me. Oh, that's to Tokyo. But if you want to go to Osaka or anywhere else, it's way more. Osaka is a $2,000 flight. Damn, dude. And then there's a stop, which you probably, maybe you stop in Tokyo? I don't know. But I'd want to go to Tokyo.

I thought it was way longer than that. I thought it was 15 hours. That's one of the few places in the world that I actually want to see one day. Japan? Yeah, Japan, Greece, Colombia. You haven't been to Colombia? I've never been outside the country. Neither have you, but.

I'm surprised you haven't. Wow, I went to Canada. Oh, that's right. My dad, like, I once brought up, he's always said, like, one day, one day, one day. And like, I recently brought up, like, yeah, we would, like, Becca and I spoke about maybe going to Colombia one day. He's like, when? When you want to go?

You know, your dad's going to go with you. Oh, no fucking shit. My dad's going to parade us around, like, look at my son. Yeah. Look at that little Frankie. I just go there, your dad's like a mayor. He's got another family. My understanding, well, that, I don't know.

I mean, he, bro, did I ever tell you growing up, he would, like, take our old cell phones and, like, some of our old toys and stuff and send them to Colombia? Yeah, your dad's got, like, three families. I, he might, but he was also being a good person. I remember he, to his other kids, to his own children, half brothers. Oh, I hope so. Yeah.

No, I don't think he has other families, but, yeah, I mean, could you imagine? Can you imagine? Would you be upset? Wait, you went too easy on that. You went too quick on that. Yup. Yeah, I mean, yeah, because of my dad. Well, no, your dad's, your dad, your parents are separated.

That's right. So he could have another family. That's right. But, like, would you, if you found out that your dad had, like, three kids that you never knew about, would you be mad or would you just be like, like, would you want to get to know them? Or are you at a point in your life where you're just like, all right, they exist? Because I don't know. I kind of think, like, I would just be like, hey, you're, you're, you're alive.

I'm alive. I wouldn't have, like, a yearning if that's what you're asking. Like, I need to know my family. Some people do, man. I'm sure they do. But I, I'm 30. Because I know that's what I'm thinking. And I'm like, you know, I would like to meet them and be like, oh, yeah, we're, I guess.

I think the part that would get me is, like, I know the dad that I grew up with, and I'd want to know what they grew up with. You know what I mean? Like, are they going to hate me because they're like, yo, like, you took our dad. Yeah, maybe. Or am I going to be like, those times when my dad was away, he was with y'all. Yeah. I don't know.

I mean, I feel like I would just kind of be like, and then I, you know, like, there was a point in my life, I think it was like 18, 17, and one of our, one of my aunts adopted someone and we met them. But it was like, you know, at that point, like, I already have like my friends and like, I guess if I was younger, it'd be like a little different. Yeah. Because you're still kind of like whatever. But at a certain point, especially now, I'm like 30.

Yeah. I'd be like, I hear what you're saying. Yeah. I think like now, and you don't even hear it. The shit like that doesn't happen anymore. Like in like the 40s and 50s, people would leave and have new lives and new families without ever knowing. Dude, all you would have to do is go fucking 10 blocks over.

Yeah. There was no social media, no pictures, no nothing. 10 blocks over. Have another family. You didn't leave. You went to the Irish or the Italian part of town and then you had a whole new life that you would never, like, literally kept secret the whole time. Yeah.

I would, if you lived in that time, do you ever think like you should have grown up in a different time period? No, bro. I kind of, I kind of do. What do you mean? I kind of think me, not you. You, you're miserable all the time. Right.

I'm, I think I would do really well in the 20s, like the roaring 20s. Okay. I would also need to be in a, like a position of like stature. Like if I was just like, yeah, cause you know what's coming in a few years, the great one. Like if I was like a Rockefeller in the 20s, I would crush dude. Oh, I think anyone would crush as a Rockefeller, like the richest families of all time. Basically. Well, though, the wall family, I think the Waltons, I think are the richest family of

all time. The Walmart people. I, I don't know if they're the Walmart people, but like the Waltons, I think. Who knows. Um, but also like if I was like a teenager in like the 70s, bro, could you, I would, first of all, I've always said like, I, you know, don't do drugs, haven't done drugs. But like, I was a teenager in the 70s where it was like weed was weed and heroin was cool. I would have been fucking crushing drugs, dude.

Probably. Yeah. I don't like just be like, yo, what do you want to do tomorrow? You want to go see queen for a penny and a half? I do wish sometimes I do wish that I was five years older, just five years. So I could be a little older for stuff that happened like right before I was born that I thought were like really cool or just like older, like, well, you'd be four for things that happened right before you were born.

What? You just said for things that happened right before I was born, if you were five years older, you'd only be like four or five. Yeah. But I mean, like, how much do you really remember when you were four or five, Joey? But what I, what I meant was like to be like a little more competent, like one of the examples, and this is a bad example, which is one of the things I'll let you, I'll let you play with it.

But like when 50 cent first came out, damn, like when we were like young for that. So if we were like a little older, speak for yourself, I actively remember get Richard I try and I know that. But I'm saying if we were a little older, we could like go out somewhere or something. Yeah, it would have enjoyed it if we were at like a house party and then just like in the club came on. Yeah, like, damn, or like the M&M and Dr. Dre run was pretty cool.

Becca tells me we were in fourth grade because, you know, Becca was born in the 60s and she tells me how was that for her? No, she's, she's a couple of years older than us. But when she was like going to like house party, she was like a teenager in the late 90s. Yeah, that's a prime time to be a teenager, dude. For music, dude, for like not just music, but like culture, like you went out and like you didn't have like, you didn't have to worry about people like snapping pictures of you all the time and like things happened.

And then they were like, they were never spoken about on social media or anything because there wasn't social media. Yeah, all the sexual assault was like swept out of the road. Hold on. Yeah, that's that's the part. But like, no, like there was also like kids were allowed to be kids more at that time. You could call people gay back then. Bro, you would fly, you just chant that people were gay in the streets, you know.

Yo, when I think about some of the stuff that like happened back in the day, I know the other day, actually, I saw a video of Howard Stern in blackface saying the n-word and I'm like, and he's with a black person. Beetlejuice. No, it was somewhat, I don't know who it was. Okay. But I was like, what the fuck is happening? Like, it was like the fact that this was like, yeah, no.

That's a joke. And everyone was like, it is. There's, I mean, bro, there's one from like 2001, 2002 of Jimmy Fallon on SNL doing Chris Rock in blackface. He also did Shaquille O'Neal. I don't remember that one. Jimmy, Jimmy Kimmel, yeah. No, Jimmy Fallon. Oh, Jimmy Kimmel, though, he did Shaq.

Yeah, which again, don't it's fucking stupid, but like at the same time, I like that's too recent to be like blackface is like, that's too recent 20 years ago, like you should have known. Well, also, it's like, bro, I feel like because at a certain point, and I don't feel this way about blackface, but there are certain things that I feel like they have to happen so that people can be like, what the fuck are you doing? And it's like a learning experience, you know, but I don't feel that way of blackface just because if you go back and you watch Judy Garland in fucking whatever movie that was where she was in like complete black, it's like very clear that this is so fucked and like you don't need to be like challenged on like, hey, maybe you shouldn't do that. It was like very clear.

It's like, this is the meaning guys. Yeah, well, that's because like what are we doing because that was paraded around as a joke, you know, making fun of people of color basically saying like, you know, how incompetent they, you know, just making these ridiculous claims about their incompetence, dude, the movie Dumbo, the original, not long ago, dude, there's a song in Dumbo. I watched it the other day because my sister put it on for fucking your nephew, my nephew. And she's like, I was watching this the other day and you won't believe like what the fuck. And she put it on and there's a part where they sing a song and it's like the crows, right? No, it's not the crows.

It's like there's like these worker men that work on like the train that fucking moves the elephants or whatever. Dude, it is fucked. Really? It's insane. Well, a lot of Disney's. It's not even like close to being okay. Yeah, like it's like people forget Dumbo came out in like 40 something or like the like or like when like that was like the cool thing to do back then.

Like I said earlier, like people were just like, oh, blackface, throw it in there. And then it was just like faceless, like just black silhouette dudes. Yeah, yeah, dude. It was so well, you remember a song of the sound we can't read or write. But we worked through the night. I was like, bro, what the fuck? Yeah, yeah, it's fucked. Oh, it's about cute little elephant.

Fuck the elephants now. Well, yeah, now they're all now you don't feel that bad about Dumbo's mom. Yeah, and also what a lesson to teach with the fucking movie Dumbo. Listen, if you're ugly and fucking weird, look at everyone's going to ostracize you. But as soon as we could use it, you're down with us. Yeah, yeah, basically. No, the the famous one that Disney put out years and years and years ago was Song of the South. And that's where that song is a bitty do dah, buh, buh, buh, buh, my oh my.

What like that's like known as like that's one that like Disney was like, we fucked up. They put it in the vault in like the 70s and they were like, we're never putting that back out there. Really? I don't even really. Yeah, if you look up the controversy, but a lot now on Disney Plus. Easy like movies like that, the Aristocats, like they'll play it and they'll just be like, there are depictions of like inappropriate, you know, like. But not only that, they have recolored Dumbo. So it looks better, right?

No point during the recoloring where you're like, this song. Well, you have the people out there that are like, it's part of our history. Like we did. And like, I get that it was included, but it's not necessarily. It's not even one of the main songs in Dumbo. I honestly can't even name it more than that in Dumbo. When I see an elephant fly, that's a banger. I don't know that one. It's like the crow saying that one.

OK, another very racist part of that movie. The crows are like a pretty like egregiously. Oh, I haven't seen. I only saw that part. And I was like, this is a lot. Bro, have you watched other ones? There are other like legitimately. It's like, you know, like there's some stuff recently, too. That's like, how did it happen?

Like you ever think the movie The Birdcage could be made today? Why not? Because you have, well, I mean, Nathan Lane is, I believe he's gay, but like big gay. Robin Williams and like he's like over the top flamboyant. So what's his name? It's not gay either. Oh, fuck. What's his name? He's the the maid. I don't remember.

Fuck me. He's a famous guy. Oh, he does the the voices for Simpsons. He does a poop. Oh, what's another Hank's area? Oh, I don't know. I don't even I would have never got that. Yeah, Hank's area. But he plays.

Well, he did the voice of a poop, which yeah, he said he's like no more. Yeah. But no, they have a lot of shit that like, you know, and like, there's some kid stuff that we showed Miles, like that we are like, like we talk to him in the like as he's watching, like, you know, never to repeat that, right? Like never to say that. My mom used to not let us watch certain cartoons because she was like, what the fuck?

Like, I remember one time we were watching like Cow and Chicken. They were talking about like sucking tits. What? Because the cow has tits. Bro, Cow and Chicken was a little risky. I remember like because it was on like late like, no sucking tits. Yeah, they were like pork butts and they just had this fat ass just coming out on a plate. You remember that? Just like a fucking butt.

It was the times, bro. It was the times. Yeah, I remember it. And there was like the red like horny devil. I do remember that. And he had a fat ass. Oh, no, no. That was Powerpuff Girls, I think. Well, no, that was him.

That's who you're talking from Powerpuff Girls. It was it was a villain named him. The one that spoke like me. I don't know. You don't remember that shit? Oh, dude. But I remember he had a fat butt. No, I don't think him had a fat butt.

Yeah, I did. I'm pretty sure it's the look it up him from Powerpuff Girls. I'm pretty sure he was skinny. Or maybe it was Rock, I was not. Rock was not. No, bro, the red devil. I remember his name was like Mr. Pile or some stupid shit. I don't know.

But from Cow and Chicken had a fucking wagon. Wagon dude. That's nice. Just like just just just causing, you know, a ruckus back there. 18 car pile up back there. Oh, yeah. It's a big accident. I'm sorry.

I don't mean to cut you off, but I don't care. Yeah, yeah. I've been watching Arrested Development lately. What was the last time you watched that show? I haven't seen one episode fully. You're kidding me. No. Bro.

I know you love that show. You would lose your mind with how funny it is. Really? You would lose. There's a character on the show Tobias Funke. And part of his thing is that people can't tell if he's gay. He's married to Portia de Rossi's character. And it's like, is he gay?

Is he not? But he always says double entendres that it's like, you know, like at one point, he goes into a cab, all dressed up in like head to toe and leather. And he needs to go to a magic show with a gothic castle. But the guy thinks he says, oh, you want to go for the gothic asshole. Brings it to like a BDSM gay club.

Bro, it's so fucking funny. Those might must be a lot of fun. Listen, a BDSM gay club? I, my, my clubbing days are over. I never really had a big clubbing experience. But. But. If I'm going to get back into it.

You got to put leather on. The gay clubbing scene, dude. Have you ever worn leather pants? No. I've never worn them either, but I really want to. I don't think I could pull them off. I don't think so either. I got big thighs.

I also sweat a lot in my asshole area. I'm going to tell you this right now. So that's basically like a biohazard. An afternoon in leather pants. I'd have to throw the pants out. Well, that's why I think the leather chaps. They're assless because it lets them breathe. Also, how do you, how, how do you wash leather?

I, I think you just like, you know, like. Throw them in the wash? Like hang it in the sun and let the fucking world do its work. Spray it with hand sanitizer? Yeah, I don't think you wash leather. Yeah, because I don't really know how to do that. I know they make like leather wipes. So maybe you just like wipe, but like the inside isn't leather.

You got to get it detailed or bring it to the mechanic. Yeah. I see a deep clean. Yeah. It's like those videos of people cleaning carpets on fucking online. Dude, I fucking love those videos. I do too, man.

People cleaning a carpet. I watch them up. There's not much else that gets me hornier. And clean it. You can clean my carpet. But yeah, if I'm going to get back into a clubbing scene, the gay clubbing scene is a lot of fun. From someone that's been to a gay bar,

I think twice in my life. Well, we're going to a gay bachelor party. It's going to be a lot of fun. Well, by the time this comes out, we'll be. We'll be home. We'll be home. Check for the next episode. Because then we'll have the stories.

We'll have the stories of how gay it may be. And I'm ready, dude. Yeah. You know, I'm ready for having fun. I'm not ready for like, I'm not going to like give myself up. Oh. For the right price. Oh.

Not you. No. Oh, I don't know. Happily married men. I'm not doing that. Yeah, but how do you know if you don't? I think I know, Joey. You think you're going to, you think you, you might,

you might dabble a little bit. You're not going to smooch a man? Smooch is nothing, Joe. I'm talking like a, wow. Oh. No. What did you just, what the fuck did you just do? What?

Again. Are you fucking kidding me? One more time. Nope. All right, well, no. We're going to clip it. We're going to run it back. You're not going to clip that because the clippers are on my.

Run that back eight times. They're on my side, baby. I didn't see that. They're on my side. Yeah. Well, that was a lot of detail. No, I don't plan on. I don't plan on sucking in penis on this trip, Frank.

I don't plan on doing that at all. You don't plan on it. You sure about that? I know. But you know what? You never plan for these types of things. They just kind of happen. That is fair.

But what I do plan on doing, Pete and Gio will be there. Listen, I plan on throwing the appropriate amount of ass just to get a pina colada. Oh, you want it. You want it. You going island drinks? Maybe. Oh.

Bro, absolutely. We're going to be in a little kind of like tropical area. OK. All right. I'm glad that this is coming out after we'll be back because then people won't be able to come down and like fucking. Yeah, yeah. You want me to give you the address?

No. I don't even know it. I don't know where we're going. But yeah, anyway, time for some serious stuff. Oh, OK. No. No. I have some things written down here that I want to.

Speaking of like. Am I in trouble? Speaking of gay, no. Speaking of gay. Yeah, as one does. Yeah, I found a story from the New York Post. And it says that a North Carolina family abandons their dog over fears.

All right, hold on. That's fucking evil. No, I mean, sometimes you abandon your dog. If you fear that like maybe it's like a zombie or maybe like it's going to kill your baby. That I'd be, yeah. You know, like some people have to give up their dogs because they don't mesh well with the baby.

Yes, that is true. That didn't happen with this family, though. The North Carolina family abandoned their dog because they feared that it was gay. Wait, what? A gay dog. So they were afraid. How did they fear that it was gay?

Like what was it doing? I'm so glad that you asked, Frank. How did they fear the dog is gay? What was it doing? They saw him humping another male pooch. And they were like, yo, what? What the fuck, dude? Get this dog the fuck out of here.

Bro, I mean, listen, dog 101, they hump everything. Male, female, inanimate. They don't give a fuck. They're going to hump it just to let it know, like, I'm the alpha there, bitch. My dog used to fuck his own dog bed. Damn. He would fold up his dog bed.

He's already slept on it. Dude, he would fold up his dog bed. I remember Chase doing this. And slam it. I remember. And also, that dog per capita had a fat dick. Really? Bro, per capita.

Keep using this like GDP. Because if you put that dick on Charlie, Charlie was way bigger. He'd be like, oh, this is regular penis. Put this dog on a little dog like that. Yeah, Chase was maybe like this big. Bro, well, that's a little, that's like a, yeah. Chase was like this big.

Oh, I think you're talking about this dick. No, no, no, like as a dog, he was about this big. Yeah. So what were we talking, dick? Like, bro, like that. Like that? Yeah, like if. Bro, that's like a fourth of his body weight.

Let me just say this. Maybe not weight. If you put that dick on a human, I think they'd be fine in their life. That's what I'm trying to say. No one would go, ah! You know? I don't think many people are doing that.

Oh, I do. Yeah? Yeah. Sometimes people ask for it. They like being humiliated. They like being shamed. Yeah, it's like, oh, look at this pathetic little bean dick. Oh, yeah, keep going.

Yeah, that's what they do. The guys are like, tell me it sucks. Bean dick? Yeah, like a little bean. Like you're like, ew, what is this stupid thing? It would never please a woman. And people are like, that's fire. Really?

Yeah, that's a big thing. I didn't know that was like a world. Humiliation? That's a whole genre out there. Really? What would you say to me if you were to humiliate me right now? You're so fucking stupid. No one will ever love you.

Well, how could they? Jesus. That's too much? I don't even think that was humiliating, which is true. No, I mean, first of all, one, dogs hunt anything. That's dog love in 101, babe. Also, if anything, that's like being the big bad guy in prison. Being like, yo, this is my shit.

Bro, Spartan warriors fucked guys all the time. And they were like considered, they're revered. It always comes back to the Greeks. You know, the Greeks love it. Yeah. But like, what's wrong? This is, first of all, where was this again, Florida? North Carolina.

OK, just about Florida. Florida and change. Didn't North Carolina have some stuff with like trans people? So thank God they didn't think this dog was trans. I mean, this is, I know it sounds stupid. The dog's name was Fesco. Damn, after the guy from Euphoria? Well, the dog's like five years old, so I don't know how.

Oh, that's weird. That was just a good call by them, I guess? Yeah. They didn't good with like fucking Sam Levinson or something? Oh, you can adopt it. It's out of shelter right now. They saved it. Yeah, good.

Anyone interesting in fostering or adopting can call Scaps, I don't know what that is, at 704-986-3881. Bro, if someone adopts his dog and sends a story in, we'll put you on the episode. Like, a little shout out. Yo, if anyone adopts this gay dog, this dog is so gay. Imagine they bring it home and they're like, it's just like, this dog is fucking gay, that gay, dude.

They were not getting it. But like, I'm going to get on my little soap box for a second. But like, people in the country where they're like, oh, homosexuality doesn't exist anymore. Racism doesn't exist anymore. Little things like this, you know? Keysie in. Yeah, dude.

You know? Also, guys, North Carolina people, you're an idiot, bro. Like, a dog banging another male dog is just dominance. Yeah, babe. And even if the dog was gay, I'm loving that dog so hard, dude. And dogs be gay? I don't know.

I think penguins are. I think they're gay penguins. No, I think penguins are just like, what's that called? Life partner? No, like, what's the shit where you, fuck me. I'm an idiot. Yeah. What's the, oh, pansexual.

They fuck pans? Yeah, that's it. I know it's a joke. No, they just will have sex with men and women and whoever. Yeah, but. A transguin. Apparent homosexual individuals are known from all traditional domestic species,

from sheep, cattle, horses, to cats, dogs, and budge-greers? What is that? What's a budge-greer? I've never heard of this animal before. Why would they include that with the basic animals? Oh, those are birds. The birds. The birds are gay?

Parakeets. Parakeets. Gay birds. Gay birds. I had. You had gay birds? No, I didn't have gay birds. You had parakeets?

I definitely had parakeets. They died before they could figure out their sexuality. No, they had lived a life. Two years? How long do birds, I don't know. We had those birds for a while, bro. Yeah, but probably not enough to figure out like what they had going on.

Yeah, probably, I don't know. Damn. What are some of the ones that talk? Parrots. Parrots, bro. Crazy. If I, I'm letting you know right now, if I had met someone with a parrot

and they were super homophobic or something, I would just teach that parrot to say, like. The gayest stuff. Not even, but just things that I know would upset them. You know what I mean? Blow my back out. I'm a man, by the way. Yes, really?

Just make the parrot say some stuff. Just really get to them. So they repeat on repeat. Like, LGBTQ plus? Oh, yeah. Just like, just to really get at them. I'm a little petty with stuff like that. On the last weekly episode, we spoke about that woman

that was whispering, like, I want you to die and like the girls here. I would do stuff like that, but like with like people. Like I'd like hide notes in like their cereal boxes that says like, this was handled by a gay man. Yeah, yeah. You know, just to really, you ever see the show Oz? No.

Oh, it's a really good show. But there was one part of a season where this neo-nazi, you know, as they do. He needed to get his gums like fixed. And like something happened where like he got fucked up and he needed to like fuck with his gums. And he was operated on by a black doctor. And the black doctor gave him gum donation from a black man

to like fuck with him. Dude, the guy, you got to watch it. It's fucking wild. He cut his mouth out. I would do that, yeah. What? Yeah. He cut his gums out?

Yeah. He puts fucking heroin all over his gums and he takes a razor blade and he cuts them all like off. You need to watch this shit, dude. Bro, these neo-nazis are wild for a lot of reasons. Also, I didn't know you could just give someone gums. I'm pretty sure you'd have to watch the episode. I could be, you know, it's been a while.

It was probably just teeth. No, no, no. Well, maybe. But like either way, like I remember it was like they gave you from like donations from a black man. And the guy was like, ah! What idiots? Yeah, those neo-nazis.

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But yo, we need to talk about the fact that Elon Musk challenged Vladimir Putin to a fucking duel, he said. Was it a duel or a fight? No, he said duel. Dual? I think he said duel. Dual means you can have guns or swords, dude.

Yeah. I hear by challenge. Elon Musk, you need to pad your your your your. Sorry. His words were single combat. What's a single combat? I think that's like whatever, dog. Street fight.

Bro, Elon Musk, I think, has like a cult. So you got to be careful. You don't know what this guy knows. No, bro, single combat. And he's single. He's all into like cybernetics. So maybe he put your shit in his hands to make himself impervious to pain.

And he'll just fucking, I don't know. Yeah, I know. I mean, how tall is Poot? I think he's small. The Poot man ain't too big. But the guy's pretty, gotta admit, guy's pretty yoked. Elon Musk's height. He's 6'2, bro.

Elon Musk is 6'2? He's a big boy. Bro. Elon Musk is 6'2, and then Poot and height. Giving me centimeter, 5'7. Not looking good. Not looking good, Poot. That's a seven inch difference.

That is a seven inch difference. Yeah, it's three. Yeah, yeah, wow. Dude, that's a lifetime there. Seven inches at that height? 5'7 is 6'2. Damn, dude. Elon Musk, my dog, Poot.

I mean, but Poot's got, he's strong. He's got, he's got angry strength. He rides horses, which like, I think that like in, in your brain makes you stronger than like anybody else. Maybe your like asshole can take a beating a little better. Dude, riding a horse hurts your ass. Does it? Oh yeah, you're bouncing up and down on a fucking horse.

I, I actually recently, for some reason was at a horse, like farm, and I noticed that the people riding them like, like rode them. Like it was like, you have to do that, bro. You have to like, well you have it like this, it's a single. And, or like this. And you have to like, you have to like, yeah, you have to like grind on them a little bit.

Yeah, you got a pretty ricky grind on me. I was like, what is going on? I didn't know that. Bro, listen up. I thought I, I was going to start this by saying I would, I would dog Musk, but 6'2. It's a big boy, bro. And he's not like a lean 6'2.

He's got some weight to him. Yeah, I mean, I don't know what he's, what he's walking around at. Take it, pull up a picture of him. They would have to have a catch weight for sure. What's that? Just like, you know, because they probably weigh differently. So, Joey's throwing out his UFC terms that I, you know, is I don't know. I'll meet you at two and catch weight and we'll have to fight, you know,

like bone v bone or something. Wait, what do you want? Like, like pull up a picture of Elon Musk, because he looked like he's got some weight to him, or is he built like fucking. I'm going to look up. Skeletor. Weight. 82 kilograms.

Come on. Okay. A2 kg to LBS, 180, bro. That's way too in shape. Bro, 180, 6'2. You're a twig. Yeah, he's not. He's not 180.

Sweep the legs. There's no way. He's got to be at least like 195. He's got a big face. He's also got a belly on him, doesn't he? I don't know. Actually, he looks like he's pretty in shape. Does he?

He's got a dumb face, though. He does have a stupid face. I think people are not very happy with him. I don't really know why, but. Well, he's got a billion dollars. No one likes billion. Well, he doesn't have a single billion. He's got a couple of them.

How many? 40? Fucking ton. Bro, he was the richest man in the world at one point this year. What? Yeah. He was richer than Bezos at one point. Bro, Bezos is big time money.

Yeah. Bezos, on the other hand, I'm washing his shit. No, you're not. Bezos? Bro, have you seen Bezos lately? The guys yoked. But he's like 5'2", dude. How big is Jeff?

Jeff, Bezos, height. Damn, he's 5'7". Damn, I don't give a fuck. I'm six foot, baby. What are you going to do to me? I mean, dude, this guy's lit up, bro. And he's also worth $187 billion. Yeah, he's going to have fucking Mike Tyson

and the hologram of Muhammad Ali training him. Yeah, he'll be able to pay. But if we both said we were only going to commit this much money to training, I think I have a better shot at beating him up than he does me. I'll tell you what, Mark Zuckerberg's 5'7", I would do unspeakable things to that man.

That's my Mark Zuckerberg impression. That's it. Why is that? I don't know. I think, yeah, Mark Zuckerberg beat him up. Yeah, yeah, obviously. There's not a lot of super rich people I don't think I could beat up.

Bill Gates, 5'10", Dog and Hand. Oh, yeah, he's old too. Who else we got? We got Elon Musk, Mackenzie Scott. Don't know who that is. It's Jeff Bezos' ex-wife. I just have a list of, oh, Richard Branson? Oh, bro, he's jumping out of planes and shit.

You know he knows Krav Maga. Yeah, he's got- You might think you have a shot, but you definitely don't. Krav Maga. What about Leonardo DiCaprio? Ah, ooh, man. I think we actually have a-

He's got some weight on him too, and he's pretty tall. Well, how tall is he? Like six foot? Nah, bro, I think he's like 6'3". Opposite Pasi? Let's get him drunk. Oh, no, he is six foot. So you guys at the same height.

Man, he was in Titanic though. Yeah. You know, he's definitely trained for stuff. He's trained for being in cold water and probably fighting me. Yeah. I don't know. I think we have a Patreon episode

where we went through a bunch of celebrities and we discussed if we think we could beat them up. It's backlogged, but guess what? You become a patron, you can watch all of our backlogged episodes at patreon.com slash the basement yard. That first tier, you get on that first tier, you get these weekly episodes a week in advance.

All those comments six days ago, five days ago, whatever. Those are the patrons, babe. So go check it out. That next tier, you get exclusive episodes just like this one we're talking about right now. Yeah. On Friday morning, start and end your week with the basement yard, patreon.com slash the basement yard.

I think, I think. Also real quick, when we hit 10,000 patrons, Frank's gonna get a Brazilian wax and I don't think that he really knows what's involved in that. I don't. Because I'm going to be filming it, which means that I'm getting a front row seat

to the inside of your asshole. And gooch or undercarriage, whichever you wanna go with. Do I wear like a thong or something? Or am I like digging balls out? Bro, thong's not saving you. I would think, I'm gonna ask, I'm gonna request to wear a thong. They have to wax everything.

They're gonna, and do you know what they're gonna do? They might have to, they're gonna wax you. And then in order to get every single hair, they're gonna tweeze. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. They're gonna tweeze some stuff. No, can we ask for like a hafsey? What's a hafsey?

Like a not as thorough. I don't need to not have fucking hair from the waist down. Oh, that's what the Brazilians do. They wax it up. You're gonna have a slick butthole. Your butthole's gonna be like oil. You could just like, when you take a shower, it's just gonna like flow off of your ass.

It's gonna be sick. It's probably gonna feel super dope. I can, let me make something very clear. Abundantly clear. I can almost guarantee it's not gonna feel super dope. I, afterwards I mean. Well, I, a couple of years ago for a Twitch stream, I got one of my legs waxed.

It felt bad and then my leg was like swollen for like a week after. Oh, you're gonna have a swollen goo. Well, I think it'd be all right. That's if we get to 10,000. Yeah, it's if we get there. So, so run on over. Because I'm trying to see if I can have a swollen goo.

Why do you want to see me like that? Why don't you do it with me, bitch? No. Oh. Because we already, we've already set this up. We already talked about it. All right, bro. Oh my God.

I know exactly what. 11,000, I'll do the next thing. 11,000? Yeah. I'm gonna fucking, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, you know, like the boxer fight your nuts. Yup. Would you have like a Dalin matrix come in here

and like hit us. Beat the shit out of you? Or that, yeah. You hit me, but not in the face. Yeah, we're in Brooklyn. They're probably one in this building somewhere. You also can't step on my balls. No, yeah.

Because I know some people are into that, but I'm, I'm, I'm, listen. That's, that's kind of scary, no? Yeah. Well, some people request that with like high heels. Like, you know, step on my balls. No way. Oh yeah.

I've seen videos. Oh. Speaking of, it's, you'll, you'll watch it. It's coming out, a jackass forever. One of the guys gets his testicle like dislodged. Dislodged. Yeah. Like detached.

Good. No. Not good. It's good. No. You need to watch it. It's real good. But why would people want their nuts stepped on?

Pain. No. Just pain, I guess. I don't know. But I mean, people do stuff that you don't really understand like this. Next woman. Ladies and gentlemen.

Synergy, babe. You got it. That's why. That's what I do. Joe Sanaga, new studio, still on it. Also, you want to hear something else? No. We're going to get to the ads before that.

God damn it. That's called cliffhanger. That is. That's called cliffhanger. A little bit of a cliffhanger. Suspense. Suspense. What am I doing?

Stop looking at me. Because sometimes you look at me and I don't know if there's bugs. Yeah. When you do that shit or you're with someone, you just go. Yeah. That used to be one of my favorite things.

I do it on purpose. That used to be one of my favorite things. Just going on with people. I just go on. Oh, oh. And then everyone just goes. Oh, oh. Yeah, that's great.

You know what I used to do in high school? I would tell people from other ends of the classroom that they were trying to get in touch with each other. What? So I'd be like, yo, Mike is trying to, he's trying to get, I don't know. And then I'd be like, yo, Mike, Aisha on the other side.

And they'd be like, what's up across the classroom? And like, nothing. They had nothing. They were like, you good? And we're just like, yeah. And then you're like, did it. And I pranked them. Yeah.

Successful prank. Crushed it. Frankie was the class clown. I was the class clown. You were? Most likely to be a class clown. Or what was it? That's not it.

Just class clown? Nope. I got my super-politives in high school. Best dressed? Nope. Definitely not. It was Mr. Sarcastic. Oh yeah, Know-it-all.

And Mr. Know-it-all. Love that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I got most popular in seventh grade. Well, that was a peek. Life is about peaks and valleys, and that was a peek. That was definitely a peek. OK.

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Start saving your money, peeps. But yeah, wanted to get to this story. You're a cliffhanger. Now we're back. Yeah, we're back. The cliffhanger story has to deal with a woman who is just, this is a new level of dedication. Do I know this?

You don't know this woman, no. No, well, yeah, duh, I don't know the woman. I'm saying, do I know this story? I don't know. So there was a woman who had to get brain surgery for something. And she had an OnlyFans account. And she had to get her brain surgery. I think something with her spine or something,

something serious. I mean, a brain surgery is very serious. I honestly don't even know what brain surgery. Is it surgery on the brain or like the skull? The brain, I assume. The brain or the spine. That would be spine surgery, though. That would be spinal surgery, a spinal tap.

Yeah. But anyway, so she has an OnlyFans account. And she kept it sexy during her hospital visit. And she was admitted for surgery on March 4th. And she was taking pictures of her tits while she was in recovery for five days and posting a steady stream of them on her fan page. So I guess if you go to this girl's OnlyFans, which

I don't think her name is even in here. I'm sure it's in here, but I can't just find it. But she was posting pictures of her tits from her hospital bed after brain surgery. So she's like brain out in the wind, like free brain. No, they didn't take her skull off. It wasn't Frankenstein. I don't know.

I remember when they did my dad's surgery, they had like, because remember, my dad had to get his, like they had to cut his skull open. And they had to put like tubes in. So they had tubes going to his brain. Jesus, that's good. Hello, good evening. So like she's just free brain and free ballin'.

Yeah, I don't know. Do you think people ask to see it? Ask to see what her brain? The brain? I don't think so. I think if you're on OnlyFans, you're not looking at brains. You want to look at titties. If you want people to step on your nuts with fucking

stilettos, why wouldn't you want people to show you their insights? Jesus. I just kept scrolling to get more in the article. Do you get the brain? No, we got bags. Oh. She's a chesty woman.

I'll say that. She's clearly like, hey man, you know, like she's getting after it. It's important that she's just sticking with it. That's dedication. It is dedication. She is a- Discipline. Accumulated.

Oh my god, this is the post. The busty brunette has culminated. I hate that word. Busty? Yeah. Yeah. Over 421,000 followers on Instagram under the handle famous for my personality.

Come on. She knows. Come on. She's got it. She's joking. A little tongue-in-cheek there. Tongue-in-cheek. Yeah, she gets it.

Tongue-in-big-tit. Oh, no. That's what it is. But yeah, so I think she was just sharing pictures of her in recovery, and she was still doing the OnlyFans. There is nothing sexy about a hospital. I just want to make that very clear. I mean, she was letting it happen.

No. The three-hour operation cost her $20,000. Oh, $20,000 AUD. What is that? Like Australian dollars? I think it's Australian. No, that's English. What the hell is that?

That was English. I also yoned while I was doing that. It was like $15,000. How do they say boobs in Australian? Barbs. Let's say in Forbes. So little fucking giggle afterwards. But yeah, she was just, oh my god, dude.

They have a picture. She has the back of her head just cut open. You want to see it? No, no, no. Can I see your head? No, I'm OK. It's like stitched up. I'm OK.

Let me tell you something very clear. Yeah. I'm OK. You don't want to see it? No. You're not curious? No. I've seen some pretty weird injuries in my life,

and I don't need to see any more if I have a chance. I'm not looking. Why? Eyes are closed. What a cold. Face in forward. What if I showed you the picture of the bag? No.

No. Let me. He goes, no. No. No, yeah. I don't want to see any of this. It's a pretty invasive surgery. She was diagnosed with an area of the skull contorts

and puts pressure on the spinal column. So that's what she needed surgery for. Yikes. Yeah. That doesn't sound very fun. I imagine brain surgery is like they have to play with your brain, beep, beep, beep. I think it's a little more intricate than beep, beep, beep.

Yeah, it's not a computer. I don't know what you're talking about. But I can imagine they have to like, you think they're removing parts of the brain if they're bad? And then what happens if then you can't scratch your neck like the right way or something? What the fuck are you even saying?

Like, the part of your brain that allows you to do this, if they remove it, are you like? Are you familiar with not the brain? No, that's why I'm asking. I'm not familiar with this, so I don't know. But anyway, she said they love the nudes, but they told me I needed a break from working. It doesn't feel like work when you love your job.

That's true. You know what? Everyone has been saying that. If you love your job, you'll never want to day in your life. You'll never want to day in your life. Even after brain surgery. And realistically, I mean, that is a level of commitment

that she deserves. Does OnlyFans have the most selfless awards? Do they have like a superlative or something where they can give out? This is the most selfless person on our site. And it's the person that was like three hours away from brain surgery. Just letting them fly.

Yeah, she was being checked on every hour to make sure she didn't have brain damage. She's been in a lot of pain, all this stuff. But somehow, just fitting those fucking nudes in there, though. I guess, man. That's dedication, man. Yo.

I guess. Good for you. Good for her, because she'll probably turn this into a pretty lucrative growth of her OnlyFans. I don't know if it's just me, but the moment I get into a hospital, I am skewed out. I don't care what I'm there for. Yeah, I don't want to touch the walls.

I don't want to touch anything. I don't want to see anyone, because everyone is like, I know that they might be in there for something minor, like a broken arm. But everyone's on the brink of death, and I just don't want to see them. You just assume that? I just assume everyone is there.

It's like clinging on for dear life. And there's surgeries. There's just open bodies everywhere. Bro, there's like, in the air, there's just blood and poop. Yeah, there's a bloody air. There's a bloody air. You know what I'm talking about. There's a smell of like, hurt.

There definitely is. There has to be. There is pain. There is pain. I think those buildings are built off the idea of pain. Well, I don't. Pain and suffering. I don't know what that means, Frank.

I'm pain and suffering. But I do, I don't know if I've said this on the show, but my grandma, when she was in the hospital, she fucking hated it. Bro, I hate the hospital so much. And I went and visited her. And I was like, because I was worried. I was like, I'm never going to see my grandma again.

But she was like, dying. When was this? 2012. Bed-dead. But this might have been 2011, honestly. But my mom went to the bathroom. And she's like, Joey, come here. And I went over to her, and I was like, yeah.

And she pulls me in. At this point, one of her eyes was just like. Oh, she's got a fucking eye. She was like, you know what? That's how you know. That's how you know, yeah. Yeah, once your grandma's always starts like looking at the clock while she's watching TV,

you're like, OK. No, but my grandma was sitting there. And she's like, come here. And then she grabs me. And she goes, she grabs me by the shirt like this. I was like, bitch, about to fight me. I'll sock her. But she grabs me like this.

And she goes straight in that eye out. She was like, get me the fuck out of here. Damn. She said to me. That's a thug shit. And I literally was like, what do you want me? Will you get out of here? Yeah.

I was like, grandma, what do you want me to fuck with? You can't leave a hospital unless the like a lot of you leave. She ended up leaving. And she stayed at my aunt's house. And my mom and my sister, they were with her until she died. She died like perfectly. I don't think that's a way to die. Dude, if she was dying.

And she also wanted to die, by the way. No, we all. She was laying in bed because she was bedridden, obviously. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they were taking care of her. And she like went like. No, bro. She would fall asleep and then wake up and see my mom and go.

Really? Yeah. She was mad that she woke up. Yeah. And she'd see my mom and she'd know she was alive. And she'd be like, damn. And my mom's like, the fuck you? That's fucked up.

Yeah. That was so funny. Obviously, you shouldn't have done this. But imagine if your mom had like died as she woke up and then like she went to sleep. Or like your mom died when she was asleep and then your grandmother woke up and your mom wasn't there. And she was like, all right, I'm in heaven.

No, bro. No, you ain't. No, you ain't. Yeah, I think my sister was the one who found her. She's like, oh, grandma's. Damn, that's tough. I don't think I. It was like nice, though.

Like, obviously it was sad. But it was like. She went peacefully. Yeah, I know what you mean. Like she went like without like pain or something. I mean, no, no, bro, it was going down. My grandma's like, yeah, I'm fucking trying. I'm, you know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. She would also say some weird stuff, honestly. Really? Like she was like seeing God and stuff? Yeah. Like she was like, where did all those people go? They'd be like, what? Like she would say stuff like that.

I remember my, I wasn't there for this, but I think when my uncle passed, my dad told me that like he saw his eyes racing and that like his eyes were racing. And my dad like thinks that like that's like, you know how they say like you play out your life year before you die? Yeah.

Like flashes before your eyes or whatever like that. My dad like still like adamantly believes that like that's what was happening. And it's like. He was just watching it. He was just watching it again and again and again and again and again and again. And it's like, damn, can you imagine?

That'd be dope, dude. I would watch my life. I would. I'd love to watch my life. But I would like to do it if like you can go back. Probably skip a couple of years, honestly. You can like make things happen that didn't happen. You know what I mean?

Like I stay back and do videos with you instead of going to college. Right. You know? But then I would like keep my like my wife and kids and stuff in that part, but like, you know, keep my Megazorge. Right, right, right.

You know, the important stuff. The Pokemon cards. You know, you know, it's like he had a time machine. The first thing he would do is go back and save his Pokemon cards. Bro, you're going to tell me you would automatically become a million dollars richer. Bro, I would go back and I would stand outside Harvard

and I would be friend Mark Zuckerberg. No, I would just invest every penny I had into Amazon and Google in like 99. Yeah. And it should be like, wait, you know? Yeah, how much money did you have in 99? Don't worry about how much I had. Yeah.

Worry about how much my mom had. I wanted my dad. Not a lot either. Yeah, no. My parents probably had less than that. And I remember winning an essay writing contest when I was a little guy, $50 for it. Remember that fifth grade?

Yeah, my mom took that. Damn, she took your bread? You should probably pay the water bill with it. $50 for the water bill? Were you guys showering once a month? No, it was in addition to her payment. Oh, OK. All right.

Dude, we used to run out of hot water like that. And I'm the youngest. So I was, you know, I was last in the totem pole. I was fucking freezing. Oh, you guys went by like the hierarchy of being able to shower? Well, that's usually just how it worked. Also, me and my brother Thomas are like bowels were synced up.

So we always had a shit at the same time. One bathroom. Yeah. Five people at six people in the house. And I'd be playing video games and like holding shits the last second and running upstairs, being like, oh my god, I got shit so bad. And then he's just in there just fucking chilling.

Really? And I'm like, bro, open. Why like that? Because I was going to shit my pants. Oh, you were going to shit your pants? Yeah. Luckily, we had two bathrooms in our house. And I don't actively remember that being a big problem

with our family. Uh-oh. Stay with me here. Yeah. I don't remember this about your bathroom. But I was in a bathroom recently where you ever take a shit at someone else's house and their toilet's so small?

I mean, I'm sure I have, but not that I can remember. Like, sometimes I'll sit on a toilet. They're like, a toilet's supposed to be like oval. Yeah, whether the shape was it, Joey, a circle? Yeah, it was like a circle. What? Because I was like sitting there and like, look, I'm not trying to say.

Yeah, you are. That my dick is 10 feet long or anything like that. It was shoved up against the top of the bowl? Yeah. Really? And I'm like, what is this? I've been to a house where I've sat on a toilet and like flushed and it was like powerful, dude.

I hate those flushes. Bro, powerful. Airport bathrooms? I'm afraid this is going to suck my asshole out. Like the plane? Well, that one too. That's a fucking crazy one. That's what we've talked about.

That's crazy. I was talking about even in the airport. Oh, I don't even remember the airport bathrooms at well. Crazy. Bro, I can tell you that there was one. I actively remember sitting on it and getting up and being like, I survived. That was an experience that I didn't almost make it out of.

Honestly, I would rather that though than the toilets where you flush it. And it's like, loo, loo, loo, loo, loo, loo. Yeah, it's like taking its time. It's like, yo, put some effort into this flush, you asshole. I need a shush. Yeah, like I can't have a water flowing. Yeah, it's just like dripping down.

It's like, oh, I guess I'll take the poop. Yeah, yeah, I hate those like half baths that are like in a hallway that like the door, it's like, you're shitting like this. Yeah. And you're like, it's like, I'm shitting and my arm is in like a fucking linen closet. Yeah.

Come on, guys. Yeah. Who designed this? It's poorly designed, absolutely. Yeah, it's a design issue. It's definitely a design issue. I'd like to speak to the architect. Call them at once.

Yes. No, bro, did I ever tell you I went into a super old apartment building that was like, it was like built in like 1790 something in Manhattan that the tub was under the sink. You like pulled the tub out and it was underneath the sink. Like it was on wheels? Yeah. Was it nice?

No. Why did I ask that? Yeah, I did. Obviously not. It's always going to get one now. No, bro, I was in there for work. And it was literally, it was like those claw baths where they like sit in the middle of rooms.

Right. Let's make sure we, I'm so glad we've moved past those. No, no. I like them. No, no, no. If they're set up next to a nice window, beautiful. No. Stand-alone baths are amazing.

I'm talking about the ones that are like in the middle of a room, Joey. Oh, if it's in the middle of a room. Not the ones that are on a wall. Yeah, it's like near the wall. So stupid. No, in the middle of a room. OK. Stand-alone baths are cool.

I've never, I don't think I've ever been in one. Bro, you're missing out. I'm sure I'm not. It's nice to like feel like, one time I stayed in a hotel and they had one, it was kind of in the middle of the room. And I was like, how do you fill this up? And then I turned the thing and it came out of the ceiling. Bro, do you remember when we went to Miami

for Danny's bachelor party? And there was a big tub that obviously me, Josh, Espo, and someone else got in. Oh, me. Hot tub. Hot tub. Yeah. No, not the hot tub.

Oh, no, the tub. The tub. Yes, yes. And we're like, yo, where does the water come from? And we turned it on and there was like a square cut out in the ceiling and the water just shot in a stream. Yeah. It was the same deal.

It was wild. That was pretty cool. Not very cool because it like gets everywhere. I thought it was pretty cool. No, it's cool to see. But I'm saying like design wise, it's like, bro, it's the same water. It makes a mess.

But it was a pretty deep tub. It fit four men. Yeah. And we had to cross legs as one does in a tub with other men. It's like we were making an apple pie. We scissored. Just call it what it is. The crust of an apple pie.

The lattice of our legs. Within the lattice of our fucking drunk, messed legs. It's a man apple pie. It was a good little time. That was a fun trip. That was also the same trip where someone else that will remain nameless. Oh no, different trip.

Someone that will remain nameless got naked in the shower with us. With me and you. No, like when one of us would be showering, they would just get naked and go in the shower. Oh, I remember this. Very. You know why I remember this?

Why? Because that happened to me. Yeah, it happened to me too. Yeah. And like, look, I don't want to shower with another man. I like my boys. I like my friends. But boundaries, that's one of those give me

your balls moments, right? Well, I didn't give anyone any balls. No, they probably tried to take them from you. They weren't taken either. I said they tried. Possibly, I don't know. I cannot firm nor condendent. What?

What? Confirm nor condendent. Confirm, but deny. But. What a time. What a time. What a time. It was a great time.

I haven't showered with one of my friends since then. I haven't either. I think that's the only time I've showered with a man. We didn't have showers in high school where it was like, meet me in the showers. We had those. We did not. Everyone wore underwear, though.

Really? Yeah. Damn. They knew. What? They knew the priests were watching through the peepholes. I mean, hey, that's not something that's probably outside of the rental possibility, but you never know.

Yeah. Oh, blaspheming. It's a good thing to blaspheme. It isn't, right? It's not. It's really not. It's OK. We can blaspheme our whole life, and then at the end,

when we're real close to death, we apologize, and God's like, all right, come on. Come on. Get in it, idiot. You're an idiot. I knew it all along. They were good. I knew it all along.

Don't fucking do it again. I told them you were joking. Don't do it again. Don't do it again. You almost went to hell. I'll send you there. Yeah. Yeah.

That's all we got for today. Frank, where can I find you, guys? You can find me in hell eventually. Yeah. Blaspheming. And imagine if you get an eternity of just torture. That sucked, dude. Unless you're trying to get your balls stepped on.

Well, then, I mean, they'll define what torture is. So your torture would be having to not gaslight people. My torture would be my megazord's being crushed in front of me. Oh, my god. You can find me at FAlvors8085, and then the Frank Alvors, Twitch, and Instagram. Go check out the Patreon, patreon.com,

slash the base of the yard. Sign up for that first tier. You get these weekly episodes a week in advance. Second tier exclusive content, episodes, at the end of every week. Go check it out. Patreon.com, slash the base of the yard. And Santa Agata Studios on YouTube, babe.

We got videos up there every single Wednesday. Monday you're covered. Wednesday you're covered. Friday you're covered. How generous is this man right here? New studio, new world, new way to take more of your time from you. So check it out.

Yes. And you guys can go follow me at JoeSantaGato. Go follow the show at the base of the yard on TikTok and Instagram, and that is all. See you guys next time.