The Basement Yard - #381 - Don't Put That Up There!

Episode Date: January 16, 2023

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Welcome back to the basement yard, Frank. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! I just look over and I see him putting this on his face and I'm like, did I scare you?

Yeah, you got me. People like bank robbers would put these on and rob banks. Different things that they'd put on. You're just also your eyebrows are kind of flared upward. How's that look? Not great. Let's see how you look. There he is, big reveal.

What bank robbers would do this? That's dumb. I don't understand. Bro, I could identify people from this. Yeah, I could identify mouths. They'd be like, give me your money. I'm like, I'd be like, bro, like, Jerry, Joey. Yeah, I know that mouth anywhere.

Yeah, well, I can tell your mouth. You would be able to pick my mouth out? Not by a feel, but by a look, absolutely. Yeah, no kidding, not by a feel, you fuck. I've never, I don't think any, like I've felt your lips in a long time, if ever. You've never felt my lips? I've definitely, you felt my lips, dude.

I mean, but not like pressed against me in any capacity. I think I've pressed my lips on you. I don't think so. You don't think I've ever like kissed like your shoulder or something or like a cheek? I've definitely smooched your shit out of you. I don't think you've, like maybe drunkenly, you've kissed my cheek, but I was also probably drunk too.

I may have, I may have kissed your neck. Are you when, no, that would be. That would be, that would have spiraled. That would, yeah, that would have gotten. Does neck kisses do it for you? What would you think? Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, bitch. Don't call me a bitch.

That was pretty gay. Do you like getting kissed on the neck? No. What about when someone breathes on your neck? Or like says like a secret into your neck, like. I mean, I don't think anyone's ever said a secret into my neck. Maybe they've come here.

I know, but I don't really, sometimes I like it, but other times it makes me go, no. I live in a secret, free environment. So like there's no, I'm not around a lot of secrets. You and your wife have no secrets. I don't think we do. Yeah, but it's not about secrets. Okay, secrets is a bad way of saying it,

but what if she had to. Like, oh, if the kids are quiet and like sleeping and it's like, you got a thing. No, but then we're this close together. Oh, you guys talk like this? Sometimes. You know what we do. That's very close.

You know what we do? You connect noses? Sometimes. You know what we do? We play this game when we're in bed and it's like pitch black. We play this game where we close our eyes and one person lays back in their pillows

and the other person has to get up and go to kiss them and just find their mouth and like kiss wherever they find. So like sometimes I'll land like here. You kissing her eye? Oh, like when you can't see, you're like, oh, I hope this. Yeah, so like I just go in where I think her mouth is gonna be

and it won't be your mouth. It'll be her chin. Have you ever hit her mouth? I think like once or twice. I got her. You've hit your wife in the mouth? No. He hit his wife twice in the mouth.

No, no, I've kissed her in that game that we play, but mostly I get her nose. Yeah. It's close. It's very close. And it protrudes. It's not that she has a protruding nose, but they all protrude.

We're playful little bitches, you know? You guys like to play games. We like to play games. We like to gamify your love for one another. Yeah, because, you know, it's so strong that we want to like play around a little bit. Yeah, do you have any like other love games? Oh, what other love games do we play?

Well, we have, we, we're intimate. We have sex. Oh. Yeah. Greg's scared the shit out of me. You guys have sex? You guys have children. Yeah.

We do. We have biologically together, two children. Right. So we've had it at least twice. Yeah. Uh-oh. This is not a page. I forgot this is not a page.

Yeah. No, I think that people can assume that as well. Well, you know, we told Miles. Yeah, you just snapped the shit out of your fingers. We told Miles that kids come from a watermelon seed. What? Yeah, so we told him that babies come. Wait, he has no idea.

He has no idea. Probably seven. You think he's going to know about fucking and sucking? I know. Yeah, I don't know the proper age for like saying. Me neither, me neither. But we told him that like she ate a watermelon. I gave her a seed and asked her to make a baby with it.

And she smiles at it and makes a baby. But does he ever get nervous that he's going to get pregnant if he's a watermelon? No, no, no, because it's a special golden seed. Which technically. You got it at the supermarket? Technically. It's not wrong.

I mean, it's more of a white seed. It's a, and I, and she doesn't eat it as much as she just receives it, sucks it in. Does she? I think there's a sucking of like sex when you have to. I mean, I've never tried to have a child, so like, is there like, because I've heard that there's like certain positions or like. That's all bullshit.

Is it? I could imagine. I could imagine it's all bullshit. You guys are just having sex. We're just doing it. Yeah, just fucking, just doing. Just going really crazy. Just do it.

Just get it over with already. That like that? No, no, no. That's what you do. Well, you just said you hit your wife. No, I didn't say that, Joey. You guys heard him. I didn't say that.

That's not even funny, you bitch. I didn't say it was funny. You laughed. I didn't laugh. I said it wasn't funny, and you said it's always been funny. Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. That's not what I said. I'm reporting the news.

You know exactly. You're not reporting the news. I am reporting the news. You're reporting the fake news. No, you say fake, fake news. No. You know what you're doing? You're being an antagonistic little fucking idiot.

I feel like you're going to say that to a kid one day. Oh, you know what you're doing? Yeah, I one time lost my like, because you have a filter with kids. So there was one time where there was a kid around that had dropped something in front of me and looked at me and goes, pick it up. And I swear to God, this is what I said.

I go, what the hell? Pick that up. I was like, bro, what is wrong with kids? And they think they could just speak to you all willy nilly. Like they do whatever. Dude, you were probably like that. I probably was. I probably was.

But I was probably a little more of an asshole. Yeah. Do it now. It's funny, because you said in a previous episode we recorded, basement guard, go check it out, that you were like, yeah, my parents didn't like you. But they were very welcoming. No, they went through, my mom always liked you.

My dad went through phases with you. Yeah, but why? I don't know. Because we did the exact same shit. He probably thought that you were like a bad influence. Yeah, you were corrupting me. Yeah. Meanwhile, we were like the fucking.

I don't know if I ever told you this, but. We never even did anything crazy. No drugs, no drinking, no graffiti. Well, well, well. We did drugs and drinking, but that was later on. I never did drugs. Well, not drugs. Fuck, drinking.

Oh, yeah, dude. I was drunk all the time. Yeah, but I think there was one of my parents who told me a story once and take it with a pound of salt because both of them are kind of not the greatest. Kidding, they're great. They told me that your dad said something to my parents. This is probably true.

I don't know if I've ever told this story. Oh my god, you haven't. I'm hearing this for the first time. Apparently, your dad. Hold on, let me just stop you. Whatever this is, it is true. OK, so go ahead. Are you sure you want it?

100%. OK. You said, listen, hold on, you're going to make something up? No, no, this is what happened. He said, listen, my kids are all going to be star third-right sympathizers. I knew you were going to make something up. No, no, no, no, no.

Supervisors? Sympathizers. Oh, sympathizers. No, and supervisors. No, he said, listen, you know, I really think Joey has like a real special ability to be an athlete. And Frankie plays too many video games, and I don't want them hanging out as much.

Wait, there's no way he said that. I swear to God. I swear to God. Oh, this is what my parents told me. And they were like, yeah, like, I forgot to tell my mom or my dad. And they were like, we felt like upset because we didn't think you played too many video games.

And I was like, I probably did. I played a lot of video games. I don't even remember playing that much video games. We played a lot of video games. My dad was treating me like I was LeBron James. Apparently. And look at you now. Look at me now.

Look at him. Jesus made it. No, and I remember I was like, I thought that I was like, did I play video games to the point that it was a problem? But like, we were outside all the time. Yeah, I don't think that we ever played video games, honestly. No, we did.

I would come over to your house and play Grand Theft Auto 3 a lot. Yeah, but you were coming over to my house. Yeah. And then at my house. I only, the game, I remember playing Twisted Metal a lot, but I played that in my house. I remember you had the WCW wrestling games in the basement.

You would always pick Goldberg, you little fucking bitch. Was it you or Davino where I would always want to hang out just so he could go play Halo? We would go to Davino's place because he had that big dumb idiot friend Dominic. And we would go and we would play Halo. And that's where the whole him not being able to sing the rap from That's a Raven came from.

What? This is a thing, a tale is a tale as old as time. You don't remember me trying to teach Davino how to do the rap from That's a Raven? I do, I do, I do. Yes, I do now. Well, he couldn't do it. I remember his video games was in the front room of his house.

Yep. And we would always play on Blood Gulch. What's that? I think that was one of the maps. Or it was the map where there was two buildings on either side and then just like a barren wasteland in the middle. Sniper stuff. And we would have Warthog fights too.

Warthog fights. Yeah, baby. I can't believe my dad thought that I was like LeBron James and he's like, my son's an athlete. He needs to be focusing on his game. And I played too many video games. But I thought about that. Also, my dad, legit, never in my life,

because he's probably talking about basketball, because that's the main sport that I played. No, he was a baseball coach for a while. Yeah, I know. But I didn't play baseball. I stopped playing baseball kind of earlier. But basketball is probably the one he's talking about, because that's when he was-

And football. You played a lot of football. Yeah, but not really. But for the point I was making is that legit, zero times, zero, has he ever brought me to the park and like, let's get up some shots? Like, not once. But apparently, he's going to my friend's parents

and being like, I don't think he approached my dad or mom and said like, I need to talk to you. I think it was like they saw each other in passing at like a grocery store or something. And it was like mentioned. I don't think your dad was trying to be like an ass. Jesus, he scares me every time. Jesus, you're fucking jumpy.

I don't think he meant it as like to be like an asshole. I thought in his head, he was just like, I'm trying to protect my kids, which is admirable. I mean, crazy. I mean, it's all right. Look at how we turned out. You multi-billionaire that has an entertainment conglomerate underneath you.

And me, couple kids. Still a lot of video games. My success is way better than yours, bitch. You go home to an empty home. Jesus. I have a dog. It's the same thing, friend. It is the same thing.

It is, it is absolutely. How you doing? That's how you're going to transition. This is our first time seeing each other in 2023. Oh yeah, is it? Happy new year. Happy new year, hug. Are you hugging yourself?

I'm hugging you. Oh, got it. I'm sending it to you though. I kind of felt it. I'm sending it to you. Did you drink a lot of champagne? No, I had children. Nothing.

Really? I had a glass of wine with dinner and that was it. Did you go out? I'm on call. I was waiting for my dog. Oh yeah, that's right. Super pranks. Waiting for, you know.

So I had a glass of wine with dinner and that was it. It was a fat glass. Are you upset with your wife for procrastinating and just not getting it over with? Yeah, way to go. I mean, pregnancy just to hold the baby in and push it out when you want. How hard could it be?

It doesn't really sound hard. No. It was a very, actually- Did you guys stay at home though? We stayed at home. It was super fucking quiet and nice and we made it to midnight. Did you hear anyone outside yelling?

Bro, there were people outside lighting fucking mortars off at 1201. Oh geez. Yeah, bro, in the street. Like, yo, I got a fucking baby in here. Yeah, well Ruby sleeps there, anything, almost. But she has confirmed on two occasions now, slept through mortar fucking fireworks.

Legit. They do them on your block? Bro, the first year for 4th of July, she was what, how old is she at that age? How old is she at that age? That's your job, that's your question. She was five months, she was sleeping and the people behind our house, behind our house,

lit off mortars in their backyard. Perfect. And when we checked on her, didn't fucking wake up. I was like, whoa, pretty rad. Well, you said rad. And then I, well. I know, you're trying to bring it back. I'm not trying to bring anything back, it's a good word.

You are. How was your New Year's? It was good. And the holiday also was good as well. New Year's was dope, drank a lot of champagne and a lot of this and a lot of that too as well. Did you feel like the next morning it was like super laborious to wake up?

That's where that ends, right there. I actually was okay. And I went to a restaurant, right? We went to a restaurant cause we like rented a thing in upstate. Did you eat food with much aplomb? No, but someone was, it was Marco. I didn't know how like Marco just says stuff.

So he goes, oh, what's the place you're going to tonight? What is it? Irish restaurant? And I was like, you're an idiot. And then they're like, no, yeah, it's an Irish restaurant. What? It was an Irish restaurant. And I got a steak and ale pie and dude.

Yeah, fire. Really? That was really good. I didn't know that Irish restaurants existed. I didn't know the Irish contributed. I hate to say this. I thought they were all pubs and bars. Right, me too.

I mean, I'm Irish and I didn't know that we contributed any sort of food to the world besides the cabbage. Well, there's corned beef and cabbage. There's shepherds pie. There's anything made with potatoes. Then they make like, you know, I think Haggis or is that Scottish?

Haggis? Yeah. I think you're thinking of Hagrid, which is a character from Harry Potter. No, no, R.I.P. No, Haggis, I'm pretty sure is a food. That sounds disgusting. Haggis?

Haggis. Remember, we stopped calling women Haggs. We should bring that back. That was fun. No, probably not. I think it was fun calling women Haggs, like a y'all Hagg. It's very upsetting.

It's very mean. When I think of a Hagg, I think of an old like, like a witch, like an old droopy woman. Haggis is a Scottish dish, not Irish. Okay, I was wrong. Different. I mean, tomato tomato.

But we should bring back Haggs. Consisting of a mixture of minced heart, lungs and liver of a sheep or calf mixed with suet, onions, oatmeal and seasonings and boiled in the stomach of the slaughtered animal. That honestly sounds completely disgusting. Yeah, but I'd try it. I mean, I would eat it too.

But steak and ale pie, very good. What, it was a steak and ale in it? I didn't have any ale. I had some grapes, fermented grapes for sure. Oh, wine. Yeah. I thought you were saying like, they gave you like alcoholic grapes to eat.

Oh no, that would be cool though. That would be pretty rad. Yeah, no, I just, I just had wine. Oh, actually, no, I got a, that's not true. Well, I did have wine that night, but there was a, there was a drink I got. It was called St. Patrick's Battalion. I was like, damn, this is the most like,

that sounds like the Rockets. This is a militant Irish drink. Yeah. It was pretty good too. But anyway, speaking of. What was in it? Mezcal. What?

Yeah. Mezcal in an Irish drink. Was there Mezcal in it? That makes zero sense. No, there was. That's like, we have a beautiful Irish drink made of tequila. And it's like, how the fuck?

Yeah, I mean, essentially, yeah. Do they have Irish tequila? No. No, they just have beer. They just have beer and abuse. Do they, they beat, do they beat? Everyone. That's the, that's the.

True. And we can joke about that because you're Irish. True. We can. I can say that. Absolutely. I can say anything. Anything you want.

And get away with it. Well, you've been doing that, so. But anyway, speaking of the holidays, we have an article pulled up here because we thought it was interesting, but a doctor, doctor is actually multiple doctor. A couple of them. They're warning people about the dangers

of doing the deed with Christmas ornaments. Up. What does that mean? Christmas ornaments? Yes, apparently people in 2021, there were apparently over 13,000 cases of people taking trips to the hospital for decorative items they had inserted into themselves.

Whoa. Do you think it's like those freaks that put like the string with popcorn on it and their butt, like butt plugs, like anal beads? I don't think that the popcorn would hold up like an anal bead would. I don't think that it would get the job done. Well, they make like wooden ones.

I was at Target not long ago. They make wooden popcorn? No, so listen, I was at Target not long ago. And you know how like those like, what's her name? The one that has the Magnolia network? Joanna Gaines. Joanna Gaines.

Yeah. She has like a line of stuff in Target. And one of them is like wooden. It looks like they'd be anal beads, but it's meant to go around your tree. Oh yeah. Maybe you shove that in your ass. I mean, yeah, you could.

But I mean, this one, I don't know if this is real or not. I don't know if these two pictures are real or not, but the first one is a straight up candy cane. You can see it in someone's asshole. So someone's out there shoving assholes. I mean, it's not shoving assholes. Well, technically they're shoving their asshole

into the candy cane. Technically, if we're being honest though, that would make the most sense. You can get a candy cane in your ass. Of course I can. Of course it's not. That's not appropriate, but you can do it. No, I would say it would be easy.

Of the holiday stuff, that's built. It's got a handle on it and everything. Well, no, the full thing is in there. So the hook. They shoved the hook in? Yeah, so like, if you were to put a candy cane in your ass, how would you do it? You would put the straight side in, obviously,

but then when you got to the hook, what do you do? You kind of curled it up. Curled it up. You curled it up. Yeah, because isn't that where the G-spot is? In, oh yeah, oh, I don't know. Where's the G-spot? In men?

Or anyone. In anyone, please, anybody. Anybody, tell me now, I need to know. In the men, I don't know. I think it's straight, it's like bunk, you just hit a button. I think it's straight, but in the butt. No, it's in the ass.

It's in the butthole? Yeah, yeah, yeah. In women, it's on the ceiling. It's in the attic. It's been attached to the ceiling. Yeah. And then there's a picture here of an ornament in someone's holl.

I mean, that makes sense. Ornaments like the- No. Like a ball? Like a ball ornament. A ball ornament. A ball ornament? A ball ornament.

Wait, how does that even work? What are the moment that your asshole made contact with? I think it would shatter into a million pieces. I think that you have to have the most ready ass. Welcoming. Yeah, to engulf something. Like before they get to the door, before they get to the door,

you open the door and you say, come on in. Yes. I was expecting you. Rolling out the red carpet. Well, the red carpet meaning your intestines. That's what it looks like. Ah. Do you have any-

It's just a straight up ball. Dude, what? Also- Oh. I mean, you don't see an asshole. You just see like skeleton hips. No, but that reminds you of the guy sitting on the jar. Yes.

Everyone's seen that. Well, not everyone, but people have seen that video of a guy sitting on a mason jar, which honestly, the first thing that I thought of when I saw that was like, this is an amazing like physical feet. Feet of butt.

Yeah. And then it cracked and I went. And he was silent? Didn't make a sound. And was pulling shards of glass. I don't know. Yeah. It was taking it right out of his butt. If of all of the Christmas decorations,

all right, let's start of all of the holiday decorations. Okay. What do you think would be the best for in search? Because a peppermint stick. Easy. A little girth to it. No, I don't know. I could get one in there.

I'm trying to think of holidays. Maybe like a Hershey's kiss. Valentine's Day. Oh. What about like maracas for Cinco de Mayo? Maracas? Yeah. Bro, maracas are big.

Yeah, but not that big. Bro, when was the last time you saw a maraca? You're going to shove a fucking maraca in your hut? I mean, there's one side that's more hole-able than the other, but then the other, if you really want to. The fat one. The fat part, the shake.

Yeah. Where it's got the beads in it. Yeah. Also, if you got a maraca fully in you. You have to shake with it. Well, you don't have to shake. You just walk around and you hear like sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa sasa.

That'd be crazy. That would be good. What other holidays like decorations are there? Fireworks. Oh, Easter eggs, dude. Oh yeah, people shove eggs in their ass. You can shove an egg in your hut. Constantly they do that constantly.

Gwyneth Paltrow's company, Goop. Yeah. Do you know there's a thing called an ovipositor? Do you know what that is? Isn't it like an egg? So it's a sex toy that looks like an alien. Like a... Penis.

Yeah. And then women will... And then you fill it with these goopy eggs. It's got like, it's like a gel. Like lube. Like the Orbeez. Like the Orbeez. And then essentially, but they're eggs looking.

They're not like Orbeez. Orbeez are small. Eggs are big. Well, they fit it in their... The front sack. The front, okay. So they feed it into their stuff. Right?

And then they have this thing. And then the eggs, and then they feed it in the eggs into their majol. So, and then what happens in there? And then they have them in there, the eggs, and then they like push them out. And that's like a sexual experience for people. What?

Peeing? No, not peeing, bud. They're peeing. Are you peeing what I'm saying? I don't know if you're hearing me. They're peeing, basically. I'll break it down for the clip and for you. Okay.

There is a sex toy called the ovipositor. I'm picking up on you. Yeah, why are you like getting in, like you're gonna get like fucking knuckle deep? I mean, it's a messy thing. There's a lot of lube and gel and goop involved. Okay. And it looks like a long tube,

like a long, like an animal's ding dong. What? Like one of them. They all look different. I know. But then you fill it with these eggs that are like alien eggs, right? And then you feed it into your vajup.

And then you kind of funnel in the eggs. So that's like you're getting the eggs in, like an alien's putting eggs in you. And then women just go like, and they push the eggs out. So giving birth is sexy now? I mean, it's always been sexy. Alien birth.

It's always been sexy. Yeah, but alien birth. That's what's getting people hard. So it makes women hard. Wait. So it makes women sexy or like feel like horny. No. Yeah.

That women get hard. That they shove fucking otherworldly eggs in them. Yeah. Bro, if there are aliens watching, they're like, yo, what are we missing out on right now? Yeah. They should get down here and get some ass.

They're like, yo, we can show you the real thing. What's really good? Well, like you're saying in an alien like, oh, bub-bub, dip. You know what I'm saying? Jesus Christ.

But yeah, that's the real thing. Also, I went to the museum of sex and they have a bunch of tildos there and vibrators and all that. We went together. Oh yeah. Oh! Do you remember they had that big dildo?

They had the big Navi one. Yeah. They had a big Navi. That's what they're called from Avatar. Oh yeah, like the Avatar Wiener. It was very big and blue. It was huge and blue. Bro, and it was sharp.

Was it sharp? What did you hit me with? You hit me with something. A dildo. Navi, Navi Avatar dildo. Hope that's your work phone. No, no, it's not.

You can't tell? I don't know what you do for work. Avatar dildo. How much is it? It's gotta be at least $118. Oh my God, dude. That's a lot. Just to get banged by a fictional alien.

This thing is sharp. Holy moly, dude. That ain't easy. That ain't easy at all. Is that safe to get that whole thing in you? I mean, probably not. Dude, vaginas are way bigger than I thought if you could get that one.

And butts. Well, butts. Butts. Aren't butts like endless? I think they're like 40 feet long in theory because of your intestines. 40 feet long. Yeah, but you would just like your intestines.

You never heard that your small intestine is like packed in. It's like 40 feet of intestine packed in your body. If I made like a little bee, right? Wait, why am I saying that? This is why I said that. I was like, if I attached a string to a bee and put it in your butt, I was like, yo, go until you can't. Well, it would die.

Or? No, no, no, it's a metal bee. Oh, okay. How did I not think it was a metal bee being shoved in my ass? Do you think I trained an actual bee? I thought you'd go with like anything else that they use for like, you know, fucking colonoscopies. It's not that.

Yeah. I have a little bee. You know why I said that? I was thinking, remember the movie Richie Rich where the guy creates a bee? Yes. That's why I thought of that. I don't know why.

Absolutely I do. Created a bee, it was wrong with me. I don't know. But you're saying 40 feet. I think your intestines are like 35 or 40 feet, like kind of coiled up. Damn, that's mad intestines. But like, bro, I'm telling you, some of these holiday

decorations are a little phallic, you know what I mean? Don't make peppermint sticks taste and look as phallic as they do if someone's not going to shove them into something. Someone sent us a picture of like a peppermint stick. You remember, sorry, I didn't know what the fuck that was. Someone sent me one that was like a gigantic one. Classic America. It was like this big.

That's too big. No. Did you get that in your mouth? No, what? Yeah, I almost got me. You almost got me, right? Almost got you. This is shit.

No, a couple of years ago. Why do they do that? Actually, you know what? You know what the ones I do like? Remember when they, you know how they make those big ass fucking rice crispies? It's like a pillow? Yeah.

I was like, oh, I love this. What's your favorite rice crispy? Regular? How do I answer that? There's mad rice crispies. There's regular rice crispies. What do you mean? What's my favorite?

The best one is the one. Why are you arguing with me already? I'm asking you a simple question. Because I know you're going to say, oh, my favorite one is the one that's dipped in caviar, you snotty bitch. Caviar? No, there's chocolate with the chocolate base on the bottom. No.

There's the one that has like the confetti shit. No, regular. I was making sure you knew the flavors, you fucking asshole. Just give me regular. I don't need to fucking reinvent the wheel here, Joey. Why? Why do you need like, oh, I like my dipped in chocolate. Like there's a fucking bourgeoisie.

Mine's the regular, too, you fucking asshole. I just wanted to make sure. OK. All right. Jesus Christ, this kid. You always love these like, weirdly. I do like the chocolate ones, too, though. I'm not a big like, I like chocolate in such small quantities.

You've never had the variety pack of those? No. Oh, my mom used to buy it all the time from Costco. Bro, Costco, we got like, it's like a 40 pack, and it's like 20 bucks. I love Costco. That's a no brainer, dude. Yeah.

I'm not like a big like chocolate cereal fan, like cocoa pebbles, cocoa puffs. Oh, cocoa pebbles are good. But I don't like them. It's too much chocolate. I agree. I would take the, we know. I like fruity.

We know the best version of fruity pebbles, and we're going to say it right now. Three, two, one, it's the Christmas edition ones. I don't know that I've ever had that. In recent history, I mean. Christmas edition on all cereals is the best version of it. Christmas cabin crunch is out of this world. Christmas cabin crunch, Christmas fruity pebbles.

Yeah. All of them. But then Halloween is second. What's Halloween? Halloween fruity pebbles. Halloween. They make Halloween fruity pebbles? Yeah, they do.

I don't know that. And then Halloween cabin crunch. Yeah. No, I think Halloween sucks. What? Like orange cereal sucks. Oh, Halloween Oreos, get better. Halloween Oreos are wack, dude.

Those are wack. All right. I'm not even going to argue. Halloween Oreos are wack. I don't have, no, no. They're not worse than the golden Oreos. Golden Oreos are stupid. The best Oreo that has ever come out in history.

And they discontinued it. You know exactly where I'm going. You know exactly where I'm going. I hope so. Is the Easter edition peep Oreos that they did a couple years ago. They were so fucking good. Oh, yeah?

No, they were discontinued because it's fucking disgusting. And the best one is the cinnamon bun ones. Those are fucking out of control. No, they're fucking not, Joey. Yes, they are. No, they are not. Yes, they are. The peep ones were the best ones.

Oh, is that why they still don't make them? Because they discontinued them because they want to make it like an exclusive thing. Oh, no, because people ate them and they went, what the? And then they took them off the shelves. They were delicious. Cinnamon. Why do you like these things?

Fuck, man. You can't ever just let me fucking catch a break here. You like the cinnamon bun ones, you bitch. They're good, but they're not my favorite. Come on. Regular. Which regular, so the regular Oreos, right? But there's a version of that.

Yeah, you know what I'm going to say. There's a lot of versions. I know exactly what I'm going to say. All right, now rank them, though. Hold on, hold on, hold on. No, no, no. You don't need to tell me. I know what number one is.

It's double stuff, baby. Yeah, double stuff. And then mega stuff? No, too much stuff. Too much stuff. There's a little too much stuff. Too much stuff here. That double stuff, though.

I like it. My goodness. Yeah, honestly, I kind of like the fence. Because you run? No. Because you go to a gym? No, I just like- I like the crisps, the Oreo crisps.

Fuck you. No. Fuck you. Yo, have you ever had brownie brittle? Brownie brittle? No, because I wasn't born in 1912. Righty. This shit is incredible.

Nah, fuck that. If you're in an airport, they sell them. Yeah, I bet they do. Brownie brittle. The best- All right, get brownie brittle if you see it. It's like Dr. Ann's or some shit. I don't know.

Who makes brownie brittle? OK, I'm not eating a brownie from a doctor, Joey. It's not- That's the last person I want to eat a brownie from. I want to eat it from fucking Mr. Squiggly Doodly Doos. What's her name? Oh, Sheila G. You think I want to eat a brownie from someone named Sheila?

Hell yeah, Sheila. She's in the kitchen throwing down. That's the most cookable name. No, most cookable name. Sheila, bring that in here. No, no, no. Barbara. That's a cookable name.

Pearl. Barbara cook. No, Barbara's, she cleans really well. Andrew. Andrew doesn't cook. Yeah, that's a cook. Guy. Guy?

Guy Fieri. No, no. Guy. I'm all about my guy Fieri. Yeah, but Guy's out in the backyard barbecuing. He's in barbecue. Well, he's in Flavortown. Yeah, Sheila though.

Sheila's throwing down the kitchen, dude. Best brownie that I could go to a store and buy is those cosmic brownies, boy. Those are so overrated, it's insane. What? Yeah, I don't think they're bad. I just think they're like so overrated. Like people have such a visual reaction.

I have one, and I can't have sugar for like four weeks. That's how rich and intense they are. If I could pick one of those things, like you walk into a deli, and it's like they have all that bullshit there. Remember those like snowballs? They're like disgusting, disgusting. But, you know, honey buns.

Dude, I used to have one before, like for breakfast sometimes. 1300 calories, I think. And 90 grams of sugar. Crazy. All right, here's a question. Well, hopefully this could be a clip. The three cereals that you would shove in your butt, go. Whether they feel good going in or out.

Right, of course. Come on. OK, definitely win du Cap'n Crunch. No, those are sharp, dude. Yeah. Cocoa puffs. Yeah. OK.

Tricks. I was going to say tricks, because you have different. You have shapes, and they're some of them are ribbed. Yeah, some of them are ribbed, for sure. And then probably golden grams. You fucking freak. Fuck you. Golden grams?

I mean, we're shoving cereal in our ass. You're going to get like high amity on me. You're not going cinnamon toast crunchies. Oh, yeah. You got to go. Well, golden grams are those, but more ribbed. Are we going for like pledge? Well, of course, you got to go for pledge.

Well, then I would go golden grams. Really? They're disgusting. They're like little sheets of paper. Golden grams are the only cereal that I know that are better dry. Honestly, I haven't had golden grams. I thought you were going to say honey smacks, like a fucking loser.

No, no, no. They look like little like beans. Yeah, I don't like it. I would say, you know, obviously we got to go what you were saying. Tricks? Yeah. Tricks? Tricks.

Fruit loops. I feel like fruit loops. They have like, you know how they have like a slick kind of film. They're like little buttholes. Yeah, well. You ever put a fruit loop in your mouth and go, you love sucking and blowing? No.

Take it easy. No, but you've never come on, bro. Everyone's done that. You put a fruit loop in between your lips. I'm sure I have. But I'm not going to admit it, Joel. You don't breathe out of your fruit loops? You put a fruit loop in between your lips.

And then I would say, ooh, berry berry kicks. Whoa, kicks. Berry berry kicks are kind of a shady favorite. They're like your best friend that was always there, and you get your heart broken by everyone else, and they're always there, and they're like, I've loved you this whole time. That's a good one.

I like that a lot. Yeah. I went through a frostachurrios phase. Oh, I have frostachurrios right now at home. I love them so much, my favorite cheerio. They're pretty good. Anyone that has plain cheerios? Yeah.

Do me a favor. Stop trying to save your health. Just die already. Honeynut cheerios is so shady, good. But regular cheerios is like, oh, my god. I'd rather go outside and eat the fruit. We missed one here, Joey. But honeycombs, dude.

Shoving those in your age? Shoving a honeycomb in my head. They're pretty big, though. Yeah, but on the way out, they'd probably feel wild. Those are not the ones I used to breathe sometimes. Yeah, we know you used to suck them. I do suck those. But I would put them between my lips and go.

Make sure you guys cut that clip, where I do suck those. Yeah. I don't know, dude. Yeah, you can do it. We have sponsors, though, that we have to get to. And that's just what it is. Folks, if you want to stay hydrated this year, which that seems to be a lot of people's resolution.

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Thank you for the 2022 we had. Incredibly successful. Climbing up those Patreon rankings, we want to be number one, and we can do it with your help. Patreon.com slash the basement yard. Joe, back to you. And you're getting very hard to bear. Really?

You'll miss me when I'm gone one day. You will. You absolutely will. Were any of your parents that parent? What? Like you'd say something and be like, you're so annoying. And then they would be like, oh, yeah? One day I'll be gone.

And you'll miss me then. No. My mom. My mom did that. Oh, she would always threaten that she's going to die. Yeah. She'd be like, one day I won't be around. And I'm like, all right, mom.

You're not chill. Ma, you're fucking 40. What are you saying? Yeah, you just turned 35 last week, ma. What are you talking about? But yeah, I know my parents never did that. Yeah, all right, well, guess just mine. Yeah, yours would threaten you with that kind of stuff.

Mine would just hit me. Uh, anyway, pulled up an article here that I found pretty interesting. X college athlete accused of biting a man's ear off, chewing a face off of a man. Why do you think he did it? Well, I'll stop you right there. He thought he was a killer robot.

What? That's the thing is that robots don't eat humans. They like use us as batteries. He thought the guy was a robot, so he ate his face. Oh, well, that's the only way you can tell a person is not a robot is if you dissect them. A 25-year-old former college soccer player suspected of savagely attacking a 78-year-old man

on a train platform in Oregon. It's not that sad. What do you mean? Keep going. Oh, you don't like old people. Chewing off his ear and part of his face, he told the cops he believed the victim was a killer robot. Well, we could all admit that the freakiest athletes

that we know and most ridiculous are people that play soccer, right? How would I know that? Well, because think of all the people you know that play soccer. Who do I know? Are they the most psychotic? No.

Ralph? I wouldn't say he's psychotic. Actually, I wouldn't either. I'm kind of working myself into a hole here. A killer robot. I mean, that's the only way you could tell. The guy was drunk and high. At the second time.

Was he drinking champagne on an airplane? No. He was drunk and high on fentanyl and marijuana. Wait, whoa. The high part on fentanyl and marijuana, what was he drunk on? Doesn't say. No, but it makes different alcohols

that have different drunk effects on you. So what do you think he was drinking? Well, fentanyl. What makes you rage? Butt heavies. Really? Or rolling rocks. I was going to say four locos.

Oh, yeah. Four locos. Four locos make me want to hurt something. Yeah, my own body after I threw it down a flight of stairs. Yeah, basically. That's what would do it. There's the only way you could tell someone's not a robot. Hold on.

This gets even better. In a subsequent interview with law enforcement, the dude stated that he believed the victim was a robot trying to kill him based on how the victim smelled. So this 78-year-old man probably smelled like a bunch of mechanical wiring. That makes sense. If you smell very mentally, then we

have probably like what's going on there. If I smelled a man and he smelled like a robot. Well, think about it, Joey. If you walk by someone and you're like, why does that smell like my elementary school handles in the staircase? You would say 100% it's because they're a robot. That's not the first time you've brought up these handrails.

Yeah, bro. They smelled like metal. I used to not touch them because my hands after would smell like metal. So in school, you would never touch the handrails? I would try not to. The only time I would is when I would jump from the top of the stairs to the bottom of the stairs.

In one shot. In one shot. But you would have to use the. I would have to use it as a whole problem. A launching pad? Yeah. You hold it and then you use it. Wow.

Yep. You are a bad-ass kid. Fucking bad to the bone, brother. OK. But yeah, if I were to find out that there was a killer robot on the loose, I don't know about biting a robot's face. Well, did they say that he was a killer? He thought he was a killer robot?

Killer robot. He said he thought that he was going to get killed. He was trying to kill him. He believed that the victim was a robot trying to kill him based upon how he smelled. So some people just smell like killers. The smell was probably the fentanyl that was in his body. Oh, without a doubt.

Yeah, we can admit that. Yeah. Do you snort fentanyl? Shoot it? What do you do? He had pills. Whoa. I didn't even know that you could do that.

I thought that the slightest bit of fentanyl could. Not the slightest bit, but I know medically they give people fentanyl, but I don't know. He had fucking fentanyl pills. Yikes, dude. Yeah, I remember I watched an episode of addictions or something, and the person was addicted to fentanyl. I'm sure you could snort it, too.

It's just whatever gets in your system the quickest. If it's a pill, you can snort it. I would imagine that it could be. Yeah, you could chop it up. But I'm not as worried about killer robots. I'd be more worried about those lizard people that all those QAnon people say are on the planet. Hillary Clinton?

Would you fuck Hillary Clinton? Whoa, dude. That is a well-respected woman in politics. I wouldn't say that. Some people respect her well. Yes, some. She used to have it going on. Really?

She used to have it. I mean, look at old Hillary Clinton. 1980s Hillary Clinton. 1988 Hillary Clinton. Let's sexualize her. America's pastime. No, not for you. Wow, so you're saying that her worth is fucking valued

based off her looks, Joey? Oh, yeah, gross. Yeah, not for me, dude. No way. Also, she drinks the blood of children, you know? Yeah. Yeah, that's right. She actually looks better now.

Hillary, you know? I think she's a good-looking woman. I think she's a bad rap. You think she gets a bad rap? I think she gets a bad rap. Nah, man, she fucking kidnaps kids. There are people that are watching this and heard me say that and go, dude, those emails don't.

Nah, yeah, I believe everything, honestly. I'm at the point now where I'll just believe everything. Yeah? Yeah, I think so. Like, what else do you believe? I think that she drinks the blood of children to stay young, because like I just showed you in that picture, she looks better now than she did back then.

I agree. And also, yo, this is weird. And maybe I'm wrong. But Hillary Clinton and Bill Clinton, they look the same. They do. They're from Arkansas. And you know there are a lot of in-bred Arkansas people in there.

So like, for some reason, when I see them, I can see the other person in them. Like, she just looks like the female version of him. Well, because they've been together for so long that you see one and you see the other. You know what I'm saying? No. Yeah, that's how it works.

I'm saying they actually feel like. That's how it works. That's absolutely how it works. I think they're still, I don't know. Do you think old Bill got it still? I think Bob still does. I'm sure Hillary could throw it back on him. Probably, probably.

We are speaking of some well-respected politicians in such a way that is the meaning of us. Well, Bill's not a politician anymore. Is Hillary a politician now? They're always doing politicking. I know that they're like. I will say this. I believe regardless of political affiliation,

they're all evil, every single one of them. Oh, you have to be an idiot. I like a psychopath. You are all of them are evil. So like, everyone's just like, no, this is the real one that's good. And it's like, yeah. That's why I like to assume that they're all

killing children and drinking their blood or whatever. It helps you feel better at night. I actually just like. Because you see that and you say, oh, they're just like me. No, I like to just go like, you know what? Yeah, all of them. And then I could just go back to my life. And then I'm, you know, what's for dinner?

Yeah. You know what I mean? I think if I'm going to attack anyone that might be a killer robot if we're bringing it back here. Right, yeah. I'm going for the face and the chest. I would go for the chest. The chest, because you could replicate a face pretty well.

Yes. But the chest, if that's where your circuit board is. Exactly. So like. Oh, the water on them. What's the layer? The skin is probably like really well done. That's a good point.

But I would stab them for sure. First of all, you have to see if there are any creases in the skin where there could be like a power box or like a circuit board or something. Correct. Usually on the back of the neck. And then, oh, maybe do something that real robots would hate like, I don't know, like throw a battery

in the trash and see if it pisses them off. I don't know that they have those feelings. I think they do. I think they see batteries as like their brothers and sisters. Talk badly about like IBM, because IBM is robot daddy. Is it? I think so. What was that big robot they made that was on Jeopardy or something?

Watson? Ken Jennings? No. Oh yeah, Watson. Watson was its name. Yeah. Just talk bad about Watson or Alexa. You'll piss a robot off.

I'll say this. I'm more afraid of female robots for some reason. Like they're like creepier. Fembots? Fembots. She's a Fembo. Najo. What was his name?

Bazoo. Najo. Yeah, I know. All right, this is what you can do to tell if the person is hiding as a killer robot, OK? Talk bad about Alexa. All right? Like start to like empathize with them

and say like, you know, those Terminator movies were on or something. See what they do. See if they're like, yeah. You know, if they take the bait. If they're like, yeah, let's talk more about that. Which is the best Terminator? Two.

Duh. That's the one where he has the. Yes, but also it's also it's just the best one. That's the blonde cop? Yes, by Robert Patrick, I believe is his name. The one that melds through the bars. Yes. Wait, is that the atomic bomb one, too?

The scene where she's like, I don't think. It was like a dream. Oh, maybe, maybe, maybe. Spoiler. It's the one where the, you know, the. The hand. Yes, you know, in the lava. So like you can like.

Dude, low key lava looks fucking awesome. Bro, yeah, I want it. I want to play with it. I want to touch lava. Bro, I saw a video once of like lava or like hot something like pouring out and some guy was just smacking it with his hand. Yeah, I'm like, yo. It was like, bro, that's that's lava.

Scary. But I don't believe lava exists. OK. I don't. And I'll tell you why. It's always pictures and videos of lava. Show me one person you know that is seen lava in person. Frank, we're from New York City.

Exactly. There's no lava afoot. Maybe not here. Exactly. Well, it's harder to be around lava. That's my point. You know, you travel all over the place. None of your friends go to lava places.

They've never seen lava. I don't know. It's bullshit. I'd like to go see lava. Until I see it with my own eyes, lava isn't real. But I'm worried about it. It's like birds, bro. Birds are what?

Birds. Yeah. Tell me a bird is real. A bird is real. You've grabbed the bird and opened it up and made sure it was real. I've had two birds and they both died. Yeah, but not like stupid idiot canaries.

Those are parrotkeets. Whatever you had. Watch your fucking mouth. I'm saying like, bro, like outside a pigeon. Tell me a pigeon's real. Well, shit. I mean, what do you want me to do? You want me to open up a pigeon?

You think that's going to play well? Yes. In society? Oh, yeah. People are really going to be upset you harmed a New York City pigeon. Frank, if I go outside and grab a pigeon and cut it open, I'm going to be on fucking the news.

You'll be dead in a week. Yeah. And I will have a disease. Lava doesn't exist. That's a crazy statement. Bro, you've seen lava? No, but I'm worried about that the same way I'm worried about bears.

Because if I'm around them, I'm going to want to touch them. Yeah, that's true. You know, like this weekend, we were upstate. And I was like, by the fire. And I was like, if a bear comes, like, you're supposed to just chill. You're not supposed to run. Can't promise you're not going to touch it.

And I don't feel like, ah. Yeah, but I don't want to. You want to play with it? Yeah, I just want to like hug them. You ever see those videos of those crazy Russian dudes that are like hugging bears? I look at them like, you know, just like hug a bear. And they kiss it?

They give it one of those fat kisses. A fat kiss on their snout. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, give me a fat kiss. Yes! Yeah. You know what? I want to press a bear's nose on my nose.

And then just hold its mouth closed? Yes! Yeah. I want to like, because I do it to my dog. I want to grab a bear by the face. And let's say this is his nose, and just go like this. Oh, good boy. And then pet his big head.

Yeah. And then I'd be dead. Yeah. That's going to be a great image. You were like this. Yeah, I agree. Lava, though, I would want to. It's like lava, and I'd want to play with it.

You know what else I want to play with? You ever seen those videos of people making candy? Like the taffy videos? No. Like, it's like they boil the sugar with corn syrup and peppermint and dye, and then they pour it on a table out of the big fucking copper bowls. Oh, yeah.

And they have to cut it with scissors and mold it and stuff like that. Yeah, yeah. I want to play with that so much. Yeah, and they're like, they make like a fucking like. Yeah, then they put it on a hook on a wall. Yeah, I think that's taffy, bro. No, it could be hard candies, too, show me.

Oh, I don't. I take it easy, buddy. You'll fucking watch more videos. No, when he puts it on the hook, dad, I'm like, this is fucking cool. Yeah, I agree. I agree, but lava's not real. We went through a big taffy thing as a family when I was younger.

I used to, my favorite taffy were the watermelon and laffy taffies. And we'd go to Sipsurf and play. That's not taffy. For a dollar, we would get 10 of them bitches. Yeah, there was 10 cents. 10 cents, babe. That was an easy-no-brainer.

OK, when we used to go to Sipsurf and play, which is a daily that we used to frequently rob, what did you usually take? Careful, because Tommy was friends with my dad growing up, so I didn't rob it as much anymore after I left. Statue of limitations. He used to steal all the time from there. Is he dead?

No, he's alive. I saw him recently. Really? He was at Dominic's thing. Stop. Yeah, was that the Chris Cool with them? Damn. I guess.

I wish I went up to him. We didn't even recognize him. I didn't even know. I honestly forgot what he looks like. He doesn't know me. Oh, he knows me. He knows the back of my head. He knows me walking out with a bunch of candy.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He knows the top of your head, too. Watch it. The top of your head. All right, you were saying, we're at Sipsurf and play. What'd you usually get? All right, I'll tell you exactly what I used to get. You ready?

I'd go in. I'd get those 10 watermelon lappy taffies. All watermelon. Yes. No bananas? Absolutely not, because bananas, disgusting. Those are good, dude. I would get the bag of gumballs that painted your mouth,

whatever color. It's like a strip? Yeah. Ew. And then I would get $1.50 size slushy red and blue. Here's what I would do. I would walk in, and I would ask Chelsea for money. Yeah, that's right.

We never asked Chelsea. That's right. But can I have some money? Yo, can you spot me? Yeah, just give me $3. Then I would order a $1.50 slushy, and I'd say put all the flavors in. All of them?

I would put all of them for a reason, though. Because you were an idiot? No, because while they were turned around making the slushy, I was stuffing my pocket. Oh, that's right. That's right. You were being a little thief. Yeah, so I would take weird stuff.

Sometimes I wouldn't even look. I would just do this and do that. Yeah, you had a problem. Because they didn't have a camera. They just had a big reflecting. Whatever they had, you had the problem. Oh, yeah, yeah, I did. That lasted a summer.

Yeah, because then you got caught. I got caught. Yeah. When did I get caught? You probably got caught. No, I never got caught. You sure? Yeah, I got away.

I don't know about that. One time I stole a thing from the deli near your house. It was a fucking pack of mad gum. I was like, I don't even want this. I remember you did get caught at what was then Oh, yes, and you had to hold me down. I had to hold you. I had to hold you down.

I was like, oh, he was going to buy it, dude. I was like, he was going to buy that. I was like, what? She was like, what are you doing? I was like, what? Yeah, it was like a pack of juicy fruit or a sticker or something. I was like, I'm holding this. Yeah.

It's like in my pocket. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you were a little klepto. What a piece of shit. If I was a murder robot, would you just be happy? Be like, you know what? I've known him long enough. I don't care. He's a good man.

He's a better friend. Wait, are you trying to kill me, though? I'm not going to try to kill you. If I would have tried to kill you, let's be honest. I would have killed you by now. OK. Would you just let me live my life, or would you want to know for sure if I was a robot?

Oh, I would be like, yo, tell me. And I say, I'm not. What am I going to do? Well, you can get high on fentanyl and marijuana. I'm not going to bite your face to figure it out. I don't even care. How bad could it be a bite to the face? Probably shoot off his ear.

All right, so? It's fucking you. It bites off your ear. Teister did it to Holyfield, and they're friends. Part of his ear. Part of his ear. They're still friends? They weren't for a long time.

Yeah, I think you're right there. There was a lot of praying and forgiving that had to go on over the years. Did they? Therapy. That sucks. I mean, dude, you bite off my ear. It's not really a forgivable act.

It was part of his ear, too. It wasn't the whole ear. If you're going to bite off any part of my body, I'd lose a part of the ear. Yeah, this part. Yeah. You could take this. Yeah.

That's why you got your nose bit off by a Saigon whore. You bastard. Guys, go watch the 1997. Has anyone got that reference? Yeah, I'm not going to tell you where it's from. If you know that reference, you deserve to be here. My back is so stiff. You know what?

I got Rebecca for Christmas, one of those massage guns. And it has a tip on it that gets hot and cold. Why did you make that face? You put it on your tongue? No, but I have to put it on my face. You ever take a Theragun and put it on your nose and then sneeze? No. You never done that?

No. Dude, do it. I put it on my neck and I tongue. Yeah, yeah, I've done that. But then it starts to hurt my neck. I get itchy. That too. I've had, like, there was one day my back was hurting

and Miles did it on my back for me. And my back was itchy immediately after. Yeah. I was like, why, why? It's the vibrations. It's just the, good bye, hey, ha, ha. Yeah, baby. It's just a sweet sensation.

Come on. I kind of hit that. You did, dude. That was looking fire. Yeah, it's all right. Can't win them all. No, I said it was good. Thank you.

But go home, take that Theragun, put it on your nose, and get ready to sneeze. You think I should put it? You're into that vibration on your penis, though. No, I'm not. When I was a kid, I was. So that means that you are? No, that's the.

If vibration can get you. So then you're in your silicloptomaniac? Fair. Yeah. No, but I have the necessary tools to clept. Oh, you can. I mean, you've been cleptowing from me for years, taking 99%.

That's an old joke. Yeah, you're into the vibration on your little wiener. No, I'm OK with that. I don't think, because that's not just vibration. That's fucking beating it to mashed potatoes. What about balls? Don't. What about the balls?

No way, dude, that would hurt. One time, recently, we got a package from Adam and Eve, and they sent a cock ring. I saw that. It was a cock ring. Did you use it? Oh, yeah, no, we did that, I think. I didn't touch your cock or a ring that was upon it.

That's not what I mean. Didn't we do sex toys or something? Not me. On Patreon? We did do sex toys on Patreon. Yeah, wasn't it? But not from Adam and Eve. I had to go on live.

Oh, no, it was a thing on my tongue. You put it on your tongue. And it makes you la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la. And it. No? OK. It's like you put it on your tongue, and it vibrates, and there's like a thing.

So I don't know. I don't even know if I'm right. Maybe that was us. Now I can't remember. I remember we had the Sukmi spray that like threw. Where is that? Did you throw all that out, by the way? Probably, yeah.

Damn. We think I'm just gonna hoard sex toys in here. I mean you had them in here for long enough I thought you would be bringing them home and fucking using them. No, I didn't use any of them. Wow Little bitch. I know I should actually the football Jerkoff thing is here. You haven't used that yet. No damn. I'm shocked. I'm not gonna come in a football That's what I mean. Why not? It's like two of your dreams coming true At the same time my dad's dream. Oh, yeah, he's an athlete. He's athlete too many video games Yeah, I don't know. No, I've never done that. I'm gonna get you. I'm gonna get you. No, you don't need to. Oh, I'm gonna know

How about you get me a thoughtful gift? That is thoughtful a pocket pussy. Yeah, but it'll be shaped like a mega zord whatever damn. All right, hold on It'll be shaped like it was like that, you know like original in box 1993 green, you know dragon zord then we might be talking Is that your next I am missing a handful of mega zords because I I haven't how many are there I only have a couple left. There's a lot, but I only want what I had as a kid But like is there like 20 or There's that many mega zords, bro, there's been like 30 seasons of Power Rangers. I Don't know. They're not all called called mega zords. The mega zord is the original

There's there's different variations of the word sword. You know, I don't know what it is a Mega zord bro. Yes, you do you were with me when I was cool. Yeah. Yeah, I know me with me I got my burns one. Oh at that place. Yeah Yeah, I remember trying to go home and we spent an hour there. I remember that for sure Bros. It was so fun Mega zords are cool. You weren't a big Power Ranger kid. I was you were I had one of these which one I think this one Which one let me see like the regular one. Oh the mega zord. Yeah Oh, which one I still don't I don't have it anymore relax. I know I know well

Maybe my mom's keeping my fucking teeth in the club in the no, I wish I wish I still had my toys got almighty Whatever, you have a whole fucking room for them now. It's a part of a room It's a room. No, but it's not it has pipes and your toys in it. It's not true. It's no pipes It didn't you? Oh, no, you were hiding them from children that day. Yes Yes, I did have to move some of my toys because I had to hide them from children got it Oh, you remember last time I was I don't know. I don't know if this is the last time I was at your house Definitely wasn't but when I went to your house, we just got fucked up and played that was the last time you were there Yeah, no, I think I came after that. No, that was beer pong

It was me and you playing beer pong in the basement. We started lining the table with my toys Yeah, but the last time I was there there was like Espo was there too, and he wasn't there. No It Espo was not there the last time you were there. Oh, but yeah, and we started putting toys in Yeah, it was like Kurt Angle doing on like a table with Jeff Hardy like flipping onto him. Oh, that was fun But anyway, that's all we have for this week's episode Frank. Where can they find you? Let's let's stay a little longer No, all right 85 on Twitter the Frank Alvarez on Instagram tick tock. Yeah All over the place and then patreon

Patreon you little bitch. Patreon.com slash a basement yard. We're climbing up those ranks. We are you want to be number one? Yep, it's gonna take some time. Oh, we can do it. Yeah with their help. We can absolutely do it. We can do anything. Yes Okay, you guys can follow me at Joe Sanagato and go follow the show at the basement yard on tiktok and Instagram and that is all See you guys next time. See you next time