The Basement Yard - #406 - RIP To Frank's Balls

Episode Date: July 10, 2023

The funeral for Frank's balls comences Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back to the basement yard. Frank, how's it going buddy? All right, are you yeah, yeah, I feel like I might be doing better than you. Yeah, well it we've always had uh we've always discussed this possibly being a topic a conversation for an episode but Santa got a studio's lost it's I mean the first person it's ever lost and Someone that's been around since the beginning Now you're losing me who's been around longer

What who's been around longer than me and you and our nuts right? Frankie losses balls. Well, that's not how... Joey, you can't just say anything. Frankie got a vasectomy and losses ball. I got a... This is a funeral episode. Um, for Frankie's balls.

For my... Stop saying balls, there's... Nuts. They're still there. They're just... Frankie showed me his balls. Okay, well slow down. I saw Frankie's a club ball.

Okay, stop! Jesus Christ! Well no balls. Wait, do you have balls? My balls are still there. Okay, second of me is they don't remove the balls, Joey. But they did cut a wire and they did go in... They did go in like fucking, you know, Tom Cruise and Mission Impossible, like sweating and just like fucking... Snipped the the wire. They did go in like fucking, you know, Tom Cruise and Mission Impossible like sweating

Just like fucking snip the right wire. They cut his balls somewhere and they turned something off They turn the valve off. They did so just like a hot water heater goes bad And you need to shut the water off. They had to shut off the water to my balls aka the sperm the boys. Yeah the boys Now do they kill them my soap? Do they kill them like have you done something that Christians will be very upset with you I'm sure I have but like have you killed anything there's a do you just there's you built a damn There's a laundry there's a laundry list of things Christians will be upset at me for Yeah, but have you built a damn or did you kill you're really showing you don't know what a fucking vasectomy is I mean I know I know, I know.

Do you? Because you're asking, first of all, my nets are gone. All right, well, the ball's thing was a bit, but I know that we've stopped the flow of sperm. Yes, so. I used to have sperm. First of all, I know about vasectomy, so you bitch. Fuck, Shfabba. To my understanding, they just like, like how that highway collapsed right outside of Philly,

and no one can use that road anymore, until they repair it, same thing. My semen, so you've just caused traffic, is all you've done. Basically, yeah, my balls are the BQE right now. So if I cut your balls open, well, you can't. Well, I don't think it's the balls themselves. I think it's like the fucking neuro pathway. Yeah, neuro pathway. I had, I don't think it's neuro. It. I think it's like the fucking neuro pathway. Yeah, neuro path. I had I don't think it's neuro

It's just a path. It's just a path So if I but I could still go again go in there and get some sperm out of you. I don't know I think it's like you know like you cut off you know like the root like you pull the weed from the root But you still you still come stuff There's still stuff there to my understanding. Yeah, I have I can't confirm that it's there because right now as of Last time when I got the recipe me There's been no production of stuff. Oh

Well, it's just because I'm I'm still healing, you know, right? Yeah, you know But I can you lose your stuff? I mean, it's just stuff like who cares? No, I need my I need stuff Well, you need it because you don't have children yet. You know, I'm saying I would be it's always stuff. Like, who cares? No, I need my, I need stuff. Well, you need it because you don't have children yet, Joey. You know what I'm saying? It's always fun to have stuff. It's fun to have stuff, really? You playing with your stuff? I don't play with my stuff.

So what do you do with your stuff that makes it fun? It's just nice to see it. You paint with it? Do I paint with it? I don't know, Joey. You're sitting here saying, like, oh, it's my stuff. I knew you'd fucking do it. No, I've just, I've been with my stuff for so long I've

had to be with you. I have to I have to and that's why this is the most somber episode we've ever done today bring it back down Frank. Yeah I have to because we're doing a full funeral procession. Actually we can have two funerals because you lost your spunk. Oh God. Frankie lost his spunk. I did. But also you, the streak is killed as well. Yes, yes. So another thing that died.

What's my throw up streak? Frankie put the fuck off. I threw up December 26th, 2008. June 28th, 2023. Mm. I have thrown up. A streak. 14 and a half years.

Crazy. Absolutely. Honestly, impressive streak. Because look what happened during that time. College, post college, a lot of drinking. You know, like those are my prime drinking years. Yeah. Only three things.

That's crazy. Yeah. There's only three things that happen. Like no food poisoning, no food. No food. A mad shellfish or something. That's crazy. Don't. Yeah. There's only three things that happen. Like no food poisoning, like a mad shellfish or something. No, no, that affects me. Any stomach stuff affects me the other way. Oh, you blow it out the back.

Oh. Yeah, it doesn't, it makes my tummy rumbly gumbley. Okay, what? Yeah, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, no, usually I get, the last time I had it, which was recently, I got the old double whammy. If you get the double whammy, huh? Yeah, I was kind of blown it out the back

and the top floor. I knew someone that had a gastrointestinal virus where they were sitting on a toilet, spitting out their butt, and then threw up all over themselves. Spitting out both ends. Throw up on their own lap. Yeah.

That's not good, man. Oh man, you gotta imagine. This was not fun. Yeah, that's not good man. Oh man. You got to imagine that this was not fun Yeah, so we described the pain right now you're sitting down on your balls. Yeah, well your balls going Honestly, I should preface the pain from the vasectomy itself not that bad I threw up because I had a bad reaction to pain medication. So That's what happened me and opio always don't mix as we learned. Maybe you cook something and it's sucked,

and then you threw up. No, because I also wasn't really eating a ton. Like I ate to get stuff in my stomach. Maybe you're not a good cook. What, no, I'm a fucking great cook, bitch. What do you do? What do you sit there and cook? I'm just saying.

You fucking cook nothing. You order food all the time. Oh, let me tell me about this fucking, you know, a capatelli What the fuck is that it's a pasta exactly bitch. You don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Oh cool You know different pastas. Yeah, what do you know penny? It's not even penny is penny penny Rigatoni. Yeah Routini give me more fucking spaghetti angel hair

fucking Routini give me more fucking spaghetti angel hair fucking Why didn't you say that like I did you on okay fucking shells Your naming shapes that's of what their death that's the thing the bottom head You're just going swirlies twirlies book a teeny. No, it's cheese. No, booka-tiny is. Oh, what's booka-tiny might be cheese? I don't, maybe, I don't know. Oh, wow, look at that, you don't know something, no? Yeah, because I'm fucking, I'm not traveling the world,

just eating cheese is like a fat slob. And I'm doing that. Yeah. So, um. Cheese abroad, by the way. We actually, we got some stuff here to memorialize my nuts. Oh, we don't have any, you might, I do. I do, I do. So I just brought the jacket after, yeah.

After... I'm gonna try to get through this. It might be tough. Yeah. After the bisectomy, I was contacted by someone that people would know from our patreon episodes By the name of Frankie skins. Oh shit. Yeah, and he wrote a uology. He probably thinks you're a bitch So very Beta those you guys don't know Frankie skins. Yeah, he is an alpha

Actually, they might not know I had no one no one really knows him Like I haven't seen him on patreon, which he's a he's a he's an alpha male Him and him you and Andrew Tate are really good friends me. Yeah, okay, and he wanted to write a urology for My nuts. I clearly explained to him my nuts are still there right right. They are they're functional The only thing they will note not not to- You try to have fat nuts. Good for you. That hangs. Good for you.

They're pretty fat now because they're swollen. Yeah, that's true. But incision looks like it's got, it looks like you put a little grape jelly on. Yeah, yeah, it's glue. And that's purple glue. It was glue. Well, I think that's probably, you know, like blood. Blood that has, you know, since, you know, kind of collotted.

That makes sense. Purple glue would look like great jelly. But they closed the incision with glue. And you know, it wasn't red? That feels like, did you do this in a hospital or like someone's house? It was like an outpatient center. Why?

Because like glue. Just like liquid cement, just like brush it on. Yeah, like what are we talking about here? Medical glue, medical grade glue is what the doctor used. And it was at an outpatient center. And you know, it wasn't sweet when the rest of my business stuck to that glue. Oh my god, you're hog.

Thank you. I wouldn't describe it as that, but sure. Oh, yeah, no, I would just be nice. I know, I know. We need to be serious here, Joey. Oh, this is my in poison gun. Wait, your dick was glued to your balls Yeah, it was for brief period of time you got a vasectomy and your dick was glued to your balls for brief period of time

It was glued to your balls. Yes, did you pee like down into your leg hole? No, I just had to rip it off You ripped your dick off of your balls after a vasecto. This is a horrible day that you It was, you know, how long was it glued to those balls in the hospital? When I woke up, it was okay when I got home after maybe like an hour or two. There was a little bit of a con it was a conjoined sitch. Yes, it was. Assign me. Well, yeah, it was expensive. I think it might be.

Okay. But don't say it with that accent you always use. I don't. with that accent you always use I No, I honestly it wasn't fine. It's just me being the character. I am a big-time character boy podcast guy Yeah, I Had to you know make it bigger than it was so This is a uology from Frankie skins.. Oh shit. And I'm going to read it as him. Yeah. Ladies and smoke shows. Oh my god. That's a wild fart noise. We are gathered here today to say goodbye to the boys. It is the most beta move available in what is the most beta move available.

Frank Alvarez went and got his nuts chuffed off. I tried to explain to him just like you. The nuts are still there. Didn't get chopped off. But they don't work. The boys have fallen. I remember when I first met these two behemoth alphas. Okay. I wouldn't say behemoth bald.

I didn't write this. I, he wrote this behemoth alphas. My, my, my sperm were alphas according to him. Oh, the sperm, I thought you were talking about the sack. No, the sack is still there, Joey. I know, I'm saying. You, you play with your dogs fucking like, coin, little empty coin purse too much in order to fucking understand how men go first of all

That's not true. Yes, also he had fat fucking he did and then what did you do? I fucking chopped them all Chopped them in and out. Chopped them in and out baby. Yeah in East River Oh those a joke I remember when I first met these two behemoth alphas. We'd reposted up in Pasha NYC and spotted a few cocks with their women. You went to the club. Pasha. Pasha. I know what it is. I can't laugh too hard because it's still a little painful. If you laugh your nuts hurt a little bit. I know your balls are connected to laughter. I think laughter is a human experience from the head to your toes. are connected to laughter? I think laughter is a human experience

from the head to your toes. When I laugh, I don't feel my toes. You don't realize it. You like what, when I laugh, I like everything sucks in a little bit like, you know? Oh yeah, maybe. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Oh, damn sorry.

All right, we were posted up in Pasha NYC and spotted a few cucks with their women. My intense alpha testosterone caught the eye of my, and my huge, dude, what happened during this surgery? Did they like give you a lobotomy too? Like, you can't read, dude. It's gonna get me reed. I could read, bitch.

You can't read. My fucking undernuts are not good. These nuts are great. We see it. My intense alpha testosterone caught the eye of my huge nuts and decided to do what any alpha would do and dominate the scene. We approached and did what we do best and began to secure the bag. What? That's how those alpha males that you guys hang out with, that's how they speak about women.

Okay. They really objectify them. Yeah. These nuts and I began a campaign of hetero dominance. Anytime I needed to destroy some of Polstered furniture, the boys were there for me. What does that mean? I don't know. I like upholstered stuff.

I do too, like beds. Anytime I needed to destroy some of Polstered furniture, the boys were there for me. I'm not sure how I'm going to rock on without my boys. Life was a sperm highway with them and now I'm driving down a dirt road. Damn dude! That's actually mad deep. You were driving down a sperm highway and then you ruined the highway. That's so fucked up to your balls. Fucking skin's man. This guy's a crazy guy. He's a deep guy. He's a crazy guy. He's a deep guy, though. He's a deep guy. He's a, what is it? Right down to sperm highway. He wrote, he said, life was a sperm highway with them,

and now I'm driving down a dirt road all by myself. I thought that I was thinking of like, love these highway. Yeah, yeah, that's a good one. Yeah, you can do it. I just sperm highway, I get it. Dirt road, I think a shit, though. I think you're colon honestly like the dirt road is like seems like I like a colon like a shit you know so when when someone says dirt road you

immediately you immediately think of but in this context why is this context because you said sperm. We're trying to you will judge my sperm count Joe. I'm sorry Jesus Christ. Alpha's become Alpha's because of their relentless desire to be carnivorous in a woman's front wet cage. Can I ask a question? What time of the day did you write this? Because if you tell me you had this over your morning tea, I'm just going to be shocked.

Can you say that one more time? Carnivorous, wet cage. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What? What? What?

What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?

What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What he wrote. Yeah. Him. Franky Skinny. Right. Alphas become Alphas because of their relentless desire to be carnivorous in a woman's front wet cage. Got it. I'm just gonna assume. Yeah, okay. All right. That's what I was thinking, I just wanted to.

vagina. Yeah. That's what he called a woman's. I got it. Again, this Franky Skin's guy. You guys are not you, it's not you. No, no, not me. You guys love a jack to find a woman.

But now I must conquer cages by myself. Okay, waking up with my fish not swimming is like waking up a vegetarian. Okay. Who will help me get people to look at my wrist when I say what time is it? Who will I play with when I'm aimlessly watching alpha TV shows like on tarage and ballers on HBO? Jesus Yeah, God, I'm sorry. It's emotional. Yeah, I can see that. It's tough, you know. Without you, I will be less alpha.

For a part of alphanus does a dies today. I will miss you, my boys. I hope you're firing off a live rounds in the club up above. Wow. That's a eulogy. I see it. Wow.

The whole Eulogy. R-I-P to your... R-I-P. It's Berm. And then he had a couple of songs he wanted to sing. What? A couple of songs or songs? Definitely not.

You think Frankie Skins is a church guy? Frankie, I don't know what's going on right now. What do you mean? Nothing matters. See, is this a song? You wrote a song? I didn't write a song. You wrote a song.

Frankie Skins has two a rendition of two songs that he wants me to sing. Yeah. Who's singing them? Frankie Skins, but I'm gonna sing as him because he's. Yeah. Without you my gizz. Oh. Okay, keep going, keep going. Want me to lead you in? You wrote, were you on the fucking 14 year old to wrote that? When I get back my wrist? What does that even mean? Oh, as balls are heard, I can't even make jokes. You know what you should have done?

You should have taken some pain medication to throw up on the show. Yeah. Sweet, dude. Yeah, that drive home would be real great. It's like I pulled over. We're fucking falling asleep behind the wheel. Get it out! Yeah.

We've come a long way. Since my first jizz And I'll tell you all about it when I get back my breeze Is that the end? Oh, okay. Wait, you have another one? Okay. Which one? Oh, never mind. Just get ahead. Just let's...

Next track. Let's hear it. Were you on Pay Medication when you wrote all this? Like, well, I'm so confused. I have a running nose, like a true addict. Okay. Okay. In the nuts were my angels.

Now they're far away from here in the knots were my angels and now they're real far from here no longer here if they put a foot better there well come on bitch you didn't fucking write this shit what song is that again? It's the ASPCA song for Sarah McLaughlin. You know? I was like, why do I know this? What would you rather have? Dead dogs or dead sperms?

Well, the dogs aren't dead. They're on their way to be dead. Watch one of those commercials. Tell me how many of those animals are still alive. Well, no, they're all dead. They're all dead now. You're the fucking things 20 years old. No, there's other commercials.

She's done multiple commercials for that. That's she. ASPCA, yeah, there's other commercials. She's done multiple commercials for that ASPCA. Yeah, there's different renditions. For her. What I, there was never a quicker mad dash for a remote when until that commercial came up. Yeah, I'm not trying to watch dogs cry in the face. Sitting there, I'd fucking 9.30 PM on a Tuesday

watching George Lopez show, and then you got this shit on me. Yeah. You think I need this? Yeah, I'm awesome. I don't need that. Bro, your Sarah McLaughlin, buy a house, hire a couple people, and fucking buy all the drugs. You got this shit on me? Yeah. You think I need this? Yeah, I don't know. I'll be that. Bro, you're Sarah McLaughlin. Buy a house. hire a couple people and fucking buy all the clothes.

Sarah McLaughlin got bangers. That one. What else? Fucking, I don't know. She's a fucking old dude. I don't know. Is she old? She looks like she's older than me.

No duh, Joey. I'm saying she wasn't, she's not our generation. Yeah, but she's, she ain't got many bangers. You got, in the arms of the angel. One thing that Sarah McLaughlin's got bread. Sarah McLaughlin's not our generation. Yeah, but she, she ain't got many bangers. You got, in the arms of the angel. One thing that Sarah McLaughlin's got bread. Sarah McLaughlin's paid, bro. I don't know, maybe because of that song. But the ASPC, you know she's volunteering for that.

She's not getting paid for that shit. We don't know that. I can confidently say that. Sarah McLaughlin, net worth. But all that shit is stupid, because it gave you like a $260 million net worth. No, it gave you like a 260 million dollar network. No, it gave me like 50 million bro by a house in Florida or Texas or something

Higher a step by all the dogs leave us out of it Sarah. Yeah, we don't need this Sarah But that was from Frankie skins for you. He he wanted to make sure he said his goodbye That's good. Do you have any stories or anything you'd like to share about your balls? About my nuts. Funny you should say that. 100% I do. Well be careful. This is not a patreon episode. I know, but I only really have one, which is that I was in a establishment, a store, and the front of the store had a, you know, a transparent... careful. It was made of glass.

Okay. There it is. And I... it was a Dunkin' Donuts, and I was eating a donut, and then I remember looking to my left left and Frankie had These balls pressed up against the glass. These are all a legend. Just want to make sure public All a legit underage stop Pocket full of drugs Come on Joey pocket full of drugs

But yeah, I've seen your balls multiple times including that time time, just now. That was my first time in a while. And you asked. I did ask. I walked in and he goes, I think you're not going to say it. And then he said, okay, I'll show them to you. And he's like, way to go. Show them, show everyone. No, Joey.

I will not. I will not show them new, vasectomized testicles. Yeah. But, just a little grape jelly on your own for a treat. What? You're in for a treat. What? You're in for a treat. Oh, no. Is this, oh my god, there's more.

There's not another song, is there? No more songs, but okay. This is a huge occasion for the show. Who? A huge occasion. Okay. And I had to contact someone to properly help me give a good send off to the boys. Okay, my sperm count.

And I don't know if you know this, but there's someone that comes out once a year. Santa Claus. No, Joey comes out once a year. And it's he's very reluctant to come out. But every time he comes out, he proves his worth. He is as of right now, the reigning three-time slam poetry poem award winner. My guess was Santa Claus.

Yeah, it's not. It's Francisco. Wow, Francisco came out and he wrote a poem. Oh, he wrote a poem for the boys. OK. For my sperm count. People are going to go crazy for this. And it's a short poem that Francisco wrote. my, for the boys. Okay. For my sperm count. People are going to go crazy for this.

And it's a short poem that Francisco wrote. You know, similar to that of Haiku. But he wanted to really, it's not that short. Right. What is Haiku? 575. 575. Okay, I thought you were going to say 9-1-1,

because that's your favorite number. I want to put out there that this is, Francisco gave this to me. He was this is Francisco gave this to me. He was crying when he gave it to me. Wow. He was really emotional and he said to read it as it is. Okay. This is a poem that he is called, grapefruit, his words.

I don't know about that, but okay. See if you could find the underlying theme here. I'm going to go ahead and guess it has to do with your that, but okay. See if you could find the underlying theme here. I'm gonna go ahead and guess it has to do with your balls, but go ahead. People would say, none up or shut up. Or it's not about the- Whoops. None up?

None up. Oh, none up. Yeah. I always say none. No, Joey, you're- This is art here, bitch. Sorry. You're really interrupting.

Now I have to get in head in Francisco's sorry head again people would say nut up or shut up or it's not about the destination it's about to come up I now look in the mirror and say now what? I now look in the mirror and say, now what? What? Okay, come on. You're interrupting art here. Hey bro, let's see your nuts. Show me what was there, what could be, what was.

Nuts on the brain, nuts now in pain, growing in swollen like Batman's villain, Bane. Mmm. Swollen. Oh, he's a little swelling, yeah. Sterilized, victimized, homicide, no. Testicide. Oh.

The fish are gone, swimming less until they're petrified and still. Thinking there is no hope, like the look from a basilisk, kill. Wait, what? What did you even say? Like the look from a basilisk? Hello.

I can't speak. What did I ever? Like the look from a basilisk? Kill. Yeah. Francisco wrote that. Francisco Basilisk. Oh, that was the end of it.

Oh, okay. Beautiful. Francisco. Oh, no. You're always sorry, sorry, sorry. Oh, I never. You were always. Can you make sorry. Oh, I never knew you were always. Can you just make sure my audio is not fucked up?

I just hit the table pretty hard. It's good. No, you're good. All right. Look from the basilisk. Because Harry Potter and snakes and Medusa penis. Oh, penis. Wait, what about the penis?

The snake. Who? what about the penis? The snake. Who? Yeah. You know? I'm waiting for the point. A basilisk is a snake. And a penis isn't a snake. It's a trouser snake, Joe.

Oh. That's what they call them. Yeah, Britain. Okay. Well, we're just not accepting British things now. Not over here. Yeah. But that's it. And, uh, wow. That's all we have for the funeral. That's beautiful. But we will end this with... There's more? What the fuck? Traditionally, there is a 10 gun salute and we are going to salute and end off on a 10 guns All right Joey, are you ready?

Please sir, please salute. I have not but I have no idea what this is by the way. I have no clue. I don't know what's going on. What is that? Is that sperm? Is that sperm? You're a child! I think that's 10. I think that's way more than 10, Frankie. A 10 gun salute. It's a different type of shot, Joey, do you get it? Oh!

It's a different shot of shot Joey to get it. Oh Come shoot I Get it I first I had no idea what that sound was You really thought about this huh you should always be on paying medications. It's done you well. I see Farewell my boys Please we have sponsors. We have sponsors for today. Man, what an episode these people chose to be on.

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So if you put 20, they'll also put 20, now you have $40 to play with and that's up to a hundred so if you put 20 They'll also put 20 now you have $40 to play with you get me So don't forget to enter the promo code basement Ed sign up and you will get that instant deposit match up to a hundred dollars But have some fun go play some prize picks and have a good time All right, and I also need to make sure I tell you guys about patreon.com now listen This is a really serious and somber episode So I have no easter egg for you guys this week But I want to let you know that if you want to learn more about Frankie skins

And you want to know how you can continue to support Excuse me support Joe and I you go to patreon.com slash the basement yard where you get these the weekly episodes one week in advance If you sign up for that first year and then that second year in addition to getting those episodes a week in advance You get exclusive episodes every single Friday morning. So guess what, you start, you end your week with the boys, baby. You know you want it, you know, it's going to be fun. It's always a good time. So make sure you go check it out, patreon.com slash the base of your round, we hit 22,000, which means we're recording our

bronze episode soon, which is going to be out there and it's going to be a disaster. And also, we know what we're doing for 23. We know what we're doing for 24 and possibly 25. So once we have that all hammered, locked and loaded, as you know, Alphamend would say, we'll let you know. So, patreon.com, size of Asia and Asia and Asia and Asia, thank you all so much. And we're going to keep on keeping on, baby.

Yes. And we also have actually another announcement in this episode. The Fourth of July. As of right now, I mean, if you're watching this on YouTube, and you're, I mean, honestly, if you're a patron, you're seeing a report. If you're a patron, it doesn't even matter.

Anyway, we see in this, the Fourth of July is happening, okay? And that is the peak of dog suckin' season and how could we Even go on in the world without celebrating such an event Dog suckin' season the peak. I mean, it's the birthplace of the hot dog technically, right? I don't know so We got new merch damn right and it's out of this world. Damn right it is I don't know. So, we got new merch. Damn right, baby. And it's out of this world. Damn right, it is.

Look at that. Oh, ho. John Frank's Dog Sucking Season. It's out of this world. Out of this world. Hot and tasty glizzies. Listen, that's me and Frank with hot dogs in our hands.

Flying up to a spaceship. No one ever says that you don't need all the trimmings for a dog suck in season. Yeah, absolutely do. And what is going that you don't need all the trimmings for a dog sucking season Yeah, absolutely do and what is gonna be a new part of the trimmings Some hot dog sucking season merch hot dogs, baby dog sucking season merch. You want it? You need it. Who doesn't right July 10th go get your dog sucking seasons Shopped at Santa got studios.com or Santa got to use that. I don't fucking know If you're not even a lunchtime,

also speaking of fucking dog sucking, and someone's gotta make the dogs, you know what I mean? And who's gonna be the Bella de Ball, except the person that has the exclusive dog sucking season? Aprins, baby. Now listen. Aprin on you. Joey's never cooked anything in his life. Un his life, but you know he's gonna start now

And if we get pictures of people in the apron cooking dogs during dog sucking season we might just lose our mind look at that Look how good we look hot dog sucking season relish in New York's favorite fresh hot waitess God, I love a fresh hot winus. God I love a fresh hot winus. Relish in it. It's a play on the earth. It's a play. It's a play on the earth. You don't need to get me there. I don't need to catch up. I'm just saying. I'm just saying. Whoa! Catch up! I got it still. I got it still.

Oh yeah. He's got it. He must have... It didn't work. No. Absolutely not. Sour crap. I don't know. Jesus Christ, Joey, just take the win while you got it. I've never had sour crout in my life. What? Yeah, I've never had a sour crout. Oh, it's so good.

What's regular crout? No, so it's not sour crout. It's sour. SAUE. Oh, I thought it was sour crout. No, Joey. I thought there was a crout and then we've soured it. No, it's just like fermented Cabbage it's not sour crowd. What's a crowd?

That's my question besides a derogatory term used to call German people is it yeah? Oh You didn't what where have you been you're always up to date with all this rockatory terminology You love that stuff. I thought it was a sour crowd. Like sour candy or like sour. I need it, I need it, it's a little sour scale. I'm sweating my ass all the time. A little thirsty, the funerals over. Everyone go to the party after we're at the pizza place.

That's not how funerals go at all. Absolutely, everyone always has a party after we're where they have food and they're like, ah, they're dead, but like we're here drinking and fucking bozin. Yeah, that's what they do. Okay. That's my favorite part of funerals.

Oh, it's not the dead person right there? Believe it or not. Believe it or not. Believe it or not, no. You should have seen Mike Brandt, Mother's funeral. I was. I did. Not that one. Oh, the one.

The other one? It was my dad's side. These people, they can't It's insane. Was your dad big emotion. I will yeah, but then at a certain point. She like mommy They're like like lowering this body into the ground the people are just all joking around I have one's hilarious and it's like yeah if I saw your dad cry. I'd probably like him less Okay, that's toxic masculine. Damn right it is. Damn right it is.

I lost the boys now. Yeah, I got it. You should be more in touch with your feminine side. I guess I should. Oh, this is not. Do you have less testosterone now? I don't think so. I don't think the tout works.

I don't know, dude. I think it's just the only thing is it's just like my sperm count is, it's gonna be depleted. Low like your SAT scores. I actually just talked about the other day, my SAT score was not good. Yeah, what did you get?

Yeah, talk about it. They only counted the two parts for colleges. They remember it was math, English, and reading, or writing? Isn't that the whole test? Yeah, and they only counted the two parts, the math and English. I think it was like a 1,500 or something like that. You idiot.

No, it's out of 1600, Joey. There were 800 points per thing. Oh no, what's the other score? It was out of like 2100 when we took it. No, I think it was 2400. 24? Yeah. I hope not.

I think so. Why, what was yours? 1480? I mean, but I don't know if that was out of 600. That's probably out of the two. Yeah, you're probably all right I mean you're right. We're we're long what a fucking scam. I also standardized testing is in New York City It was like if you put the wrong answer you're fucking you're fucked if you don't put an answer at all You're okay, but you put the right answer, you get a quarter point.

It was like, what the fuck? Dude, you know how I was saying? You remember that shit? You put the wrong answer, you lose a point. You put the right answer, you got like a quarter point. And if you didn't put anything at all, nothing happens. Is that what it is?

Yeah, and it was like, do you remember, and all of the SAT prep, it was just like, you get 800 points or so many points and you just put your name I was like oh yeah shut up you fucking losers I took it twice the second time I did worse than I did the first time such a stupid like one test to rule them all you know what I'm saying like this is stupid hated hated I cheated on it how that's like the big don't cheat test. Yeah, no, I did. You okay?

Also, like, by Proctor, I love that word. Yeah, it makes me feel like a doctor who's gonna poke your butt. Fuck your butt. Yeah, you know, like, with a prostate doctor. I think a John Proctor. Who's John Proctor? From the Crucible? You and your fucking...

A Crucible? You clearly didn't do well on your ass. They tease you if you don't know what the crucible is oh What's the crucible? It's a play Joey English literature fucking look it up Because a fuck about that It's about the burning of witches at the stake. I thought you would memorize it Salem, Massachusetts I think so yeah, they were like all bitches can read burn them. Yeah must be a witch. Oh my god Must be a witch. Oh my god

Tell me one plus one one more time Holy shit. Are you looking at me and then reading the best? No the best is that what they would do is they would like Ty rocks to them and like throw them in a river and they're like If they can get out of it. They're a witch. If they die, they weren't a witch. And it's like, didn't really give a much of a choice there, Billy. Yeah, I don't know about that one, cuz. Oh man. Also, witches can't fly. We're out there at Bromestame. Yeah, what? Like, you read a book, you old idiots.

They didn't have much like fucking like study material back then, you know? That's kind of crazy though. They were like, oh my god, you could read literally the same thing on fire. I saw her singing, big witch, big time witch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kind of nuts. Trajic, I think there was only like seven women that actually died in reality.

Oh, that's fine. And well, I don't know about that there, babe. Yeah. Speaking of, actually. Thank God it wasn't men. You remember you said that? Well, no, I didn't see that. I didn babe. Yeah. Speaking of, actually. Thank God it wasn't men. Remember you said that? Well, no, I didn't see that. I didn't say that.

You said thank God. You didn't realize? You said thank God it wasn't men. And then I said, whoa, and you said gay men. And I was like, whoa, Joey. Don't you dare. That's what you said. Turn pride month of all months.

Yeah, we are still in pride month. I didn't realize that like witches were just wizards, but girls. No, but then what are warlocks? Which is a sweet name. What is that? A warlock. I think it's like a boy witch. I thought that was like a thing.

I think the wizards are like pointy hat, long beard, giant staff, and they do like cool magic. Like they just make like ants march in a line or something yeah wizard witches are like oh grumbling bumbling I'm gonna tell you they can't a bumbling you know yeah yeah and then warlocks are like the guy version of that but they're always in suits I thought warlocks were like animals like pigs no Joey those those are ward hogs. That's so bad. You kidding me? Warlocks?

Warlocks and ward hogs, that's very close, Frank. It has to be, I thought it was like a magical pig. Warlocks are a man who practices witchcraft, a wizard or sorcerer. Wait, so that's like a trans wizard. I guess you can go from here. Because if witchcraft is women, witches, and a man is doing witch stuff, it's like a trans wizard. I guess you can go from being a witch. Because if witchcraft is women, witches, and a man is doing witch stuff, it's like,

oh, I guess back then they could be, their pronouns were like witch slash, slash, you know, ag, or whatever, they would call witch's warlock. And then yeah, for men it would be like, you know, war slash lock. I would definitely want to do more witch stuff. You know how sick it would be to be called a warlock?

Yeah, like, bro, I'll sign me up to be a fucking warlock. I don't know. I knew some people in college that were wickens. Yeah, but that's just like board white people. It is board white people. But they, you know, they believe in like, I burnt the tree, I burnt the leaves to my favorite tree, and now I will fucking see the dead.

Actually, you know what? I retract that statement. I don't want to fuck with anyone who thinks they're a witch or a guard. Yeah, I don't either. I don't want to be caught. I don't want to. I support you. Joey was the one that was making fun.

Don't even start. Joey was the one. Now, once white people start, you know, lighten candles in the shape of a star, I start getting scared. I do too. And then if I see a white, never trust a white person, full stop. Also, never trust a white person, full stop. Also never. Also never trust a white person with dreads. Oh, I don't.

That's a real outside of California. You don't really see those. Oh, you shouldn't see them anywhere. I would say, well, I don't know. No, yeah, once they get into like, you know, like we're friends of everybody. We're we're allies across the board. You want to, you know, put like liquids and smoking cauldrons with dried ice, I'm all about it. I'd like to be there.

If we have any witches who are watching this right now, mean Frankie would like to come to your layer dungeon? I don't think that's appropriate, Joey. I think they just call them homes. Wherever you cook up potions. And we'd like to throw some frog legs in there or something. I would throw a couple of them. Or they I have a newt.

Yeah, you need the I have a newt and the blood of a gang. But the thing that's hard is that when you're cursing someone and I know this, you have to, it's like, you have to go get a piece of their underwear or like a lock of their hair. Oh, that's no problem. I Mean it's more difficult than getting an eye of a newt actually that would be pretty difficult to I don't even know what a newt is It's like a salamander. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's like a little bit. I haven't seen a set bro legitimately Haven't seen a salamander since 1999. Yeah, did you guys have one? We did yeah Yeah, it's orange. It was, and it died.

And it, well, things die, Frank. Well, but no, we're gone and we die. We're gone and we die. We die, like, unnaturally. Like, didn't die because of, like, old age or something. It died because it got out and got into your garage and just, like, got crushed by a weight or something. Oh, I mean, you're, I don't know.

I could be completely wrong, but. I think that you are. I tend to not think I am. Right, I know that. But yeah, you ever have a salamander touch your hand? I think that you are. I tend to not think I am. Right, I know that. But yet, you ever have a salamander touch your hand? I put the little pads, those stupid ass fucking pads. You know what it's like, you ever put 25 cents in that thing and the hand we can throw to get the wall.

Dude, I got a thing on it. I got kicked out of a college class for one of those. You got kicked out of a college class? Yeah. Hold on, hold on, hold on. You're in college with a sticky hand. Yeah. Those are for literally one year olds. Joey, I know who they're for.

But why did you have a sticky hand? The restriction limit of ages doesn't confine me. With toys. With toys. With toys. With toys. With toys. With toys.

Oh my God. So, you passed. We had gotten, like, we had gotten, there's this, all right, I'm going to say it. There's a website where you can get like, like little like trinkets and gizmos and stuff like that called Oriental Trading. And, I don't know if you can say that.

I don't know about that, not on this show. It's the name of the company, Joey. I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm just saying. I'm not doing anything wrong. You were just naming some companies earlier and songs. What was that one Jay-Z and Kanye song you were just singing? I was like, where are you going with this?

People in Paris. Yes, yes. No, but we had gotten it, and I was, Dude, those things are great with like grabbing paper. No, hold on. And I was in it. Back up, you went on a website, and then- No, I didn't get it.

It was given to me by the website, by someone that ordered them from the website. Ordered multiple sticky hands. Yes, yes, yes. It was like, we had, so we had mailboxes in the office where all the RAs would stop in and out and stuff like that. And someone had for like, it was like, you know, a May month, it was like,

give me a hand, or you deserve a hand because you did great during this project or something like that. God, school sucks. Sorry. I totally gave it. And I would sit there and I took like three of them because... And I would...

You'd have a paper in front of you and I'd fucking whack it over there and I'd pull the paper toward me. Like an iguanas tongue. Dude, yes. No, like an iguanas tongue? Or was it a chameleon? I think it is a chameleon. It's a tongue. They have that fat tongue at the end that you want to suck on You know what I'm talking about? No, I don't

It looks like jelly and juicy and I you want a suck on I'm not gonna suck on a chameleon's tongue But it looks a little they just said you were gonna know I did tongue I said it looks like you want a suck on it that would know it doesn't I you Joey No, you know, you don't want to suck on it. Don't put your fucking fingers at me bitch. I mean all my fingers How about that bitch? You're the one who said you want to suck on a chameleon's tongue don't want to suck on it. Don't put your fucking fingers at me, bitch. I mean, all my fingers. How about that, bitch? You're the one who said you want to suck on a $2 million ton. Don't you dare.

I didn't say that. Don't you point all your fucking fingers at me. When you point fingers, you have three more pointin' back at you. So point those all back at you, bitch. Where are you getting at 13 fingers? No. When you point fingers, you have three more pointin' back at you.

So don't you have, if I do this? You point fingers like that. Like you're fucking like 1970s wizard. Yeah. Yeah. I had to sticky hands. They were fun to play with, and I got in trouble in a class because I did it too many times, and they asked me to leave.

So what? Dude, we went all that way for that. Yeah. Get out. Get your sticky hand and get the fuck out. It wasn't even the fuck. It was just get out. Yeah.

The funniest time I got reprimanded in college, since you're asking, is, dude, do me a favor funniest time I got reprimanded in college, since you're asking, is, dude, do me a favor, use the word reprimanded again. Jesus, there was a professor, and he was a professor of history. I hate history, the class itself, I hate it. I hated, hated, hated it. I literally, it's like,

we wish that history would just repeat itself. Pfft. Yeah. But he was our, and he told us, he was like, listen, I'm a cool guy. Like, you, all I care about is come to the class. You can sleep in here, you can be on your phone, all I care about is that you come to the class. Just calm. So I said, I was like, okay, all right. And one day I went to the class and he had made a joke and I was laughing.

And he goes like, in a joking way, he goes, you think that's funny? And I was like, shit. It was like, yeah, that's funny. You're a clown. He did not like that. He was, don't you ever call me a clown? And I was like, fucking, like I didn't say fucking to him. I was like, yeah, what? He's like, I'm not a clown and I was like fucking like I didn't say fucking to him

I was like what is like I'm not a clown. I'm not your boy. I was like fire god damn this guy was serious about I think we were talking about like the apartheid or something which serious but like yeah Why is he a club what apartheid I don't know I don't know It was something that we were talking about in current events at the time, but my name in Joseph Coney Do you remember him? I do Share my name sake. Yeah guys fucked up. We do have God almighty God almighty how have we just been like you know?

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how much you put in. All right. So go out there and learn a language. It could be nice. But yeah, what are we talking about? It's ironic that... Ah, Coney. Yeah. It's ironic that we had a funeral because the actual real world tragedy of the submarine destroying, you know, getting destroyed. Jesus. I will say that it is pretty fascinating how those people died.

And I'm sorry I worded it that way. It's pretty cool how they died. It's what you meant to say. I felt like I... That's what you said. I feel like you said it worse than me. No, that's what you said, Joey. No, I apologize.

It's obviously a tragedy, but like the good news, if there is any that came out of this, is like, they died instantaneously. I would say even didn't clicker than that. And even before everyone else had previously thought, they apparently died like minutes after they lost power and like fell and it was on like Sunday. We were talking about it on like Thursday and like wondering what was going on. So yeah, apparently I saw a video and I mean,

I didn't do any of the research because, look at me. But I saw a video of this guy who looked like a scientist, I'm just gonna believe that he is. And he said that what does look like a scientist look like and have glasses? That's it, yeah. Just like, just.

And he was old. That's it, yeah. And so, and he was old. That's it. Yeah. And so anyone could look literally if anyone who's old and has glasses is telling me something scientific, I am assuming. You're just going to be. Amelessly believe it. Yes.

Kind of, I kind of respect that. Okay. But the guy said that like something about the amount of time it takes for us to feel pain and then like it gets your brain and like, oh, I'm in pain. That's a certain amount of like milliseconds or something. And the same thing with your site. So when you see something, your brain, like for you to be able to see it, your brain has to like whatever the amount of time that takes is a certain amount of milliseconds as well. The speed in which they died was quicker than both of those things. So literally

they're existing and then they're not, and they have no idea. And it's not even in like a blink of an eye or a snap of a finger. It's way quicker than that. Way quicker than that. That's wild. That's kind of crazy.

And also, that's how I, like that's, in that situation, because we said, like the worst part of that whole thing was the idea of them waiting. Yeah. And like the idea of them in this thing, in this vessel, they're shitting and pissing and throwing up and like they're cold and all that.

Nope. It was power goes, they fall, they're fucking gone. And that's it. And that's kind of a bit of a blessing in this situation, no? Yeah. I saw someone had posted it, it might be fake. Someone had posted an email exchange between the CEO of the company and like a safety tech.

Excuse me, I'm sorry. Oh, we boring you? Fuck you. And a safety tech. And it was something along the lines of like, the most like hyper, you know, like fucking CEO, bro thing I'd ever read. And it's like, listen, this thing is not safe.

And so many words I'm paraphrasing here. It was like, this thing is not safe. And if you run these tests, like something catastrophic had happened and he had responded with something along the lines of like, people love to use safety as an excuse to hinder innovation. And like we are going to move forward with this because that's what innovators do. I was like, you fucking little skunk.

Like you fucking little bitch. You know what I mean? I mean, yeah, not cool that you got a bunch of people killed with you. Yeah, it was, I heard that it got as hot as the service of the sun in there. That'd be crazy. And it's like, you turn into like a gel. Do you think like there are any like,

sharks down there like slurping up that gel like, no, no, no, no. I don't think that sharks can get that low, baby. There are sharks that can get that low. Oh, what can get that low? There's 6,000 pounds of pressure per square inch. That's a lot of pressure. Yeah.

You step outside the fucking thing. Yeah, just crush. You become fucking full dust. Yeah. That's all right. Fucking. Are you going to the sea of the Titanic anytime soon? I would never get in a submarine.

Yeah, no, no, there's no shot. I would never- There's no shot. And I would never get on a boat that I can't see the shore. Like, I'm not going on a boat. I think it's like we're just surrounded by- Pro.

Get the fuck in here. People did you see- I saw it all over Twitter. There was a cruise line. I got hit by like a bad storm. Dude. I saw that fucking no can we make cruises illegal why do we need a fuck with the ocean like

what can we just not fuck with one thing the ocean and bears those two things let's just admit that we aren't gonna fuck with them because we will lose all the time period there's no way to not lose them. Now we can take out the bears. Yeah, but not. I would never shoot a bear. I think they're so cute. Oh my God. The other day I was watching,

there's a new R planet on Netflix. Okay. And I love those shows, but I fucking hate those shows. Because they're just like, oh, like, look at how beautiful this little panda is. And then it's dead Yeah, and it's like just getting fucking mauled by like a philosopher raptor

So I'm watching our planet the other night, and it's about polar bears and there's a mother polar bear Dude polar bears kind of a big selfish bitch to me. Whoa. Oh, yeah, not Jesus. She was like climbing the rocks of this thing It's fucking rocky and you got two little kids and it's tough for them and she's not behind them And the waves are crashing it's like bitch. This is fucking crazy to climb on their little kids But she's and then she like eats a bird and it's and what does he leave for the kids? Who's what I'm saying she didn't leave nothing for the kids? David I'm getting to that David Adam Edinburgh Edinburgh is over there's like he's she's gonna eat and let like I'm gonna you know what? You just I'm getting to that. David Edinburgh's over there, she's going to eat and let. I'm just not gonna do that.

You shouldn't have started. But basically he was saying she's not gonna wait. She's gonna eat it. And if they get there in time, then you can eat. One of them ate, the other one got there, he's exhausted. And he's like, oh wow. And then she's like, we gotta keep looking for more food. So she goes to climb back up the rock, slippery slip. And like, but she's good. She's a fucking full grown up. She's a mama bear and her fucking

Oh fucking kid bear cub thing false No, she's having a tough time and starts like whaling I'm like a bit like you'll fuck this bitch, bro false. It's death. No, falls on up She gets all the way up the other one gets up, he's by himself and then David Ambrose going, yeah, she might just fucking bounce on him and fucking leave him. I'm like, what the fuck you guys, you got a responsibility? She shouldn't have had to sex. Jesus Christ, and let me guess, it was all the male, it was all the man bears fault.

It was not a man bear to be seen! Damn, those man bears just fucking hit it, quit it and just left the mom with two cubs. I was like, I can't watch this and I go to turn it off But then I see the bear starting to get up and then it gets up and then but then the bitch is like oh There's no food here, so we got a bounce now. We got a swim so the bear the little bear who hasn't eaten So I'm super tired now you're gonna make him swim. He's gonna die. I turned it off Did it get eaten by a seal? I didn't watch did it get pulled it get pulled under by a seal? I pulled over. Pulled under. Oh, no, I didn't watch.

Did the bear, I don't have any more information. He jumped into the water and I went, done. Not watching this. I don't like what I see things get in water. I get agitated. Like I get, like, you know, like I can't watch it. Because you think someone's going to like... So wait, so that bear got in the water.

What happened to it next? Like, was that... Are you fucking with me? Because I'm going to fucking come over there. I stopped watching as soon as the three bears jumped into the water I don't know what happened so you watched the fucking the climb But you didn't watch the you know the swim I couldn't watch this thing either drown or not make it Frank That's kind of fucked up you Joey. Honestly, and I'm thinking about it like why wouldn't you watch that bear? Why would you you should you know what you should do?

You should get a bear, let it have cubs, and then teach it the right way to parent. Cause you're such a good dog, Dad. I don't think you appreciate the gravity of the situation here. There's a fuck. All right, it's a bear, it's fine. A polar bear dies, a polar bear dies. They're dying anyways.

What did you just say earlier? I asked about that fucking stupid-ass lizard that you guys had at kids that you probably ate or something weird and you said, uh, all things die. Alright, this fucking bear, maybe it's time came a little sooner. It's just a bear, Joey. I think the mom just being a selfish bitch. The animal kingdom is all about Maslow's hierarchy and needs, and the number one is, you know, yourself. You don't even have balls! What do you know about the animal kingdom? Joey, Joey, Joey, I have balls.

They're still there, you saw them, bitch. I did see them. You did see them, and they got grape jelly on them. Pretty, stop with this grape jelly. I don't like it. Pretty sweet looking balls, right? I wouldn't say that. Why not? Sweet, right? Oh, I wanna say that. Why not?

Sweet. How would you think my balls are sweet? I like sour. Yeah. Real sour, not like sour crab. That's not sour. It's sour, it's sour crab. Sour crab?

Yeah. I can't even have had sour crab, dude. I don't think I have. It's the perfect like saltiness for your dog. You know what's good? Pickled, either pickled cabbage or pickled onions or something? Bro, pickled cabbage It's the perfect like saltiness for your dog. You know what's good pickled Either pickled cabbage or pickled onions or something bro pickled cabbage is Basically sourcrout wait what's the what's the pink one of right the red one? It's pickled onions other than that What's wrong with you? I don't I don't know. Oh, finally you eat something other than fucking chicken nuggets

And now you don't remember the name of it? This is a myth that you've created. Chicken nuggets, wipe and catch up and duck sauce off your fucking plate. Here's like a child. You have the diet of a fucking angry eight year old. You go to a diner and you ask for the kids menu. You go to a diner and you ask for the kids menu. Or you go to a Spanish fucking restaurant. They're like, what do you have? And they're like, what do you want?

You're like, give me the kids menu. And and they're like oh, we have a spaghetti's That's not true. That's exactly what you fucking do. Oh never eat spaghetti Why two ethnic for you. You suck at it prick I'd be willing to bet I'd eat more foods than you have I can guarantee you probably haven't Nope, I have guarantee you probably haven't. I'm gonna say, yeah. Nope. I have. Have you eaten Indian? Yes. Have you eaten Korean? Yes. Have you eaten Thai? I'm talking about foods, like things to eat. Bro, like a list of, I'm definitely eating more than you, baby. Okay. I'm saying like actual, you look like a limo driver right now. I feel like a limo driver. So you can't get over to the airport.

It's like I just need like a fucking like baseball cap on forward. It's be like where are you going? Yeah. Yo, would you get a driver? No. I like driving. I like driving. I like being in control in my vehicle.

What's weird about that Joey? I don't know. You're gonna get a driver now. Ask a therapist. Fucking bitch. I'm not getting a driver. We ask a therapist. Why is that weird bitch? Sorry, I like being in control. In my car, I said maybe maybe listen to me for once. I said sitting there on your fucking your high your hyperly tower of just fucking like I'm the best. I'm gonna get a driver. You gonna get a driver to drive you in what in fucking hours for the traffic joy lives two is enough two is more than fucking enough I'm done I'm not saying you move like two miles from here and it takes you longer to get here than it previously did you fucking that's not true bitch that's not true listen you stupid

fuck I asked you if you would ever get a driver I didn't know the answer's no what kind of money do you think I'm making Joey? I'm not fucking big war bucks daddy war buck warlock bucks like you I'm I'm saying in a hypothetical world. Can you not imagine? Can you not have fun for a second? I have a fun time all the time. I'm mr. Fun. I'm King Fun, bitch. Yeah, I bet. Who are you? Who are you? You're not fun at all.

What do you do yesterday? Look at me. I have a t-shirt and a blazer. I'm fun as hell. Are you or are you just a fucking raging douchebag? No, I look like, you know, like, what do you have on your feet? Show me your feet right now.

Socks. Exactly. And shorts. And sliding shorts. Slighting shorts. Are you fucking playing baseball? These are not sliding shorts Frank, these are fucking briefs. What brand?

I'm gonna destroy you right now. Calvin Klein. Champion. Calvin Klein. Champion. Oh my god, he has Gucci boxer briefs. How much does it run to you? 400 bucks?

Champion, I put these on Amazon. I'm sure, Joey. Show it, get up and show us your bare ass right now. Show us your fucking hole. I want to show Joey. Show it. Get up and show us your bare ass right now. Show us your fucking hole. I want to show you everything right now. No, no, no. Your bare butt. Can I ask you a question?

No. Do you? He didn't listen to me, huh? No, I'm not going to let him. Yeah, no. Assholes. Yeah. Are they a commodity?

I just want to see. I just want to see? I just piece of... I just want to look at assholes and go, whoa. Assholes have had a comeback the last... I guess I assume. No, straight buttholes have had a big comeback the last 10 years. I remember when I was leaving college, it was all about licking butts. Well, I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that.

I'm saying, you're looking at butts. You're looking at a butthole and you're going, I like that. I think you accept a butthole as a butthole. You know what I mean? Like, you're not looking for a bleached one or you know, like you know what butthole is a butthole. It is what it is.

Would you know a bleached one if you met it? I don't think so either. I would have to see the original color first. Yeah, if I saw it think so either. I would have to see the original color first. Yeah, if I saw it before and after. I would have to see it before and after. Yeah. Before I can confirm, say, that's a bleached. I just feel like that's not necessary to bleach your bum.

Why do you get one? Me bleach. Yeah. What does that require? They got a bleach. They got a paint. I think it's like that, like the bleach that people use in like their hair and stuff like that. Also, they're gonna like paint that bleach jelly. It's like yes. Yeah, they'll just paint your ass hole with bleach

Oh, I don't want to do that. Why not? It's weird. I've never opened my hole to a painter before you you You rich people are just into weird shit. You might as well Who what you guys love that what? You guys love that stuff. You guys. Yes. I'm not bleaching my asshole. You should, honestly, you should.

But maybe if we hit 26,000, I'll bleach my asshole. But we wouldn't be able to tell we'd have to see pictures. You'd have to, you would confirm. You'd have to post, no, no. I would confirm by taking a picture. No, we can't show people my asshole. And then I would take a picture of your lips and say once his asshole wants his lips,

but in reality, they'll both be your asshole. Right, you know? It'll be one of those tricks. Yes. Yeah. Spot the difference. There is no difference. No difference, both asshole.

That's how you keep retention high Little fucking marketing Thing for you to hit bit there you go. Thank you. You ever want to market your asshole there you go CEO Joe Always working baby anyway, I think you can end there Frank. Where can they find you and you're not balls? I have balls Sorry, I thought was I have balls and alborsL was like, I have balls. FL was 85 on Twitter, the Frank Alvarez on all other forms of social media. And then make sure you go check out the Patreon,

Patreon.com, such a big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big big Don't forget July 10th, go get the motherfucking, you know, dog sucking season, the new merch is dropin' baby shop.sendinghousestudios.com. I believe that's the website. We're not gonna check. Do it. It's in the description. Just go there. It's been a long day without you my cheers.

My gizz, that's what it was. And I'll tell you all about how. We ended the episode. Oh, it's fun. That's what it was. And I'll tell you all about it. We ended the episode. Oh, it's fun.