The Basement Yard - #442 - The Saddest Songs In The World

Episode Date: March 18, 2024

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Welcome back to the bas- BASSMEN YARD Welcome back to the Basement Yard. What are you doing? I'm tipping my cap toed him, yeah! Okay. I have to- I'm running out of ways to open the shows. I open them.
Starting point is 00:00:17 Oh, but I kinda- I think people look forward to me more than you. Probably, I'm not gonna lie. I hope so. Please, please, please, please, please. I feel like, let's see what Frank's wearing today or something. Well, normal clothes. What are you? Are you okay? What? Blue head to toe? What's going on? No, I'm just, yeah. Grey pants though. But blue background, blue hat. You're really liking that hat. That's like a third day that you've worn in the last two weeks.
Starting point is 00:00:38 Really? I don't know. I just grabbed it because it's like the light blue and the light blue. Just wear more hats. Just get more hats. I have other hats. then just wear other ones. I okay. It's not that hard I matched Too much too matchy though. Yeah, would you agree? Maybe I saw your eyes dart toward my shirt you were ready to start making fun of what I'm wearing I was just gonna say that you're not matching It's a loose match. It's a loose match. No, it's not. What?
Starting point is 00:01:06 What? The shoes? This whole outfit, Frank, it's all over the place. I highly disagree. I'm wearing a navy blue shirt. I can see that. A green hat. Correct.
Starting point is 00:01:15 Greens and blues go together. What's with the bracelet, by the way? Is your daughter making that or something? Yes, yes, actually. Well, actually, this one was made by my wife, but my daughter also made me one. And you left that one at home. I just, I'm such a little like, you know, like. Oh, I have a question for you. Okay, your turn.
Starting point is 00:01:31 Absolutely. Yeah, well, I started that. Everything. I'm canceling that turn. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. There was a question on TikTok. It was like, wife, daughter, mom, in what order, or like, what's the order of importance?
Starting point is 00:01:45 Ooh, like overall importance? Yeah, just like if you had to rank them. You're asking me to upsettle like, you know. No, no, no, I think that they're- Personally, because you have one of those things right now. Yeah, you have one that we know of. Maybe there's some little- There isn't. Yeah, you never know. little Josephine's running around
Starting point is 00:02:07 Just gonna rock You know, okay I mean importance that's such a weird. No, it's a input. It's just like rank them. No, no like fuck Mary kill It's a joke Joey It's a joke Joey Yeah, it is a full joke um okay Let's say Like rank burning house down who's in first? Am I throwing people into that?
Starting point is 00:02:38 That's not Feed the fire someone's gotta go in no, but it was like oh right I forgot how they proposed the question, but it was something like I know you're saying It's like when when when you have all three as a man. What's where they fall where do they fall I think I? Love my mother my mom is last of course she's my mom is last of course I love her so much unless you're Italian and you live in her basement. Well they would say Italian and you live in her basement, they would say one. Italians, my mother, my mother. That's out of fear because their mother,
Starting point is 00:03:07 at the fucking age of 32, will still beat the dog shit out of them. Props, props, props. Mom is last. I would say daughter first and wife second. That's my answer too. That's my answer too. Because, I mean, that's not discrediting Becca
Starting point is 00:03:23 in any capacity but like first of all take your actual family out of this we're talking about hypotheticals here I don't want to actually have this conversation. You want me to murder my wife? That's not what I'm saying. No no no I know it's just like I like and I I've asked Becca this too like who do you love more me or the kids and it's a different type of love but obviously the answer is the kids yeah and that's okay well I't think it's about love. I know like you have it's like you're fucking I do it It's a character. I do if I'm being honest, I play like hyper alpha male, bro Oh, yeah, it's like if you fucking like anyone other than me
Starting point is 00:03:55 I swear to God like yeah, you will never send a text message ever again I've seen some people who say like their mother first their mother over their wife. I'm like, that's bananas I think that's I did that or bananas if I did that my mom would be like you're a fucking idiot I would hope so yeah and also your wife would be like you're a fucking idiot yeah definitely hurt no I think like it's as your family gets so I've learned like as your family your immediate family gets bigger it also gets smaller you know what I mean? Like as your core, like you get married, whether it be to man, woman, however you identify,
Starting point is 00:04:29 and then you have children, it's like the walls close in. The most important thing is what's in those fucking four walls of your home. And then, you know, I'll save, not save you, but I'll save this. Save me, what am I gonna do? No, no, no, no, no, no. What I'm saying is, I think that it's your child.
Starting point is 00:04:48 Actually, I don't know if I mean what I'm about to say. I would say your child is first. Yeah. Not even just daughter, child. Until they're like 30, and then you're switching back to your wife first. I don't know, I mean, I was like, I don't know if I believe that. I'm not there, I'm not there yet, obviously. But like, I feel like you can't ever, like, the love for a child is so specific and so
Starting point is 00:05:14 like fucking compact and like just so dense and rich that like you can't, it's true. Like I don't know how else to explain it. It's describing bread, basically. You can't it's true. Like I don't know how else to explain it bribing bread Loving a child is like a really fucking pound boys It's dancin rich. Yeah, you can't like I love the kids in ways. I'll never be able to love Becca Obviously vice versa. I would hope so. Yeah But like you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah, it's just it's too it's too much I know I thought it was an interesting question though because there is a wrong answer and it is putting mom first I said back. I was watching weird transition. I was watching Deadpool 2 the other day and
Starting point is 00:05:53 Have you seen it? Yeah, it's good. You should watch them. The third one comes out in the summer, but This guy working on the film Third one comes out. Ryan Reynolds is currently on board to possibly be a big brand big investor and Hugh Mr. Jackman Hugh mr. Jack look at that seed listen Give us your workout plan. It's online. It's ridiculous It's like boiled chicken five times a day and it's like 60 grams of protein per it's stupid 60 grams of protein is not that much. Per meal. That's a lot.
Starting point is 00:06:26 Yeah. Like six times a day. Yeah, no. Oh my God, what are you, big poops. Poops, his ass smells so shitty. Yeah. He's got the shittiest smelling ass. But I'm watching, I'm watching Deadpool 2,
Starting point is 00:06:42 and without spoiling anything, there is a scene where someone talks to someone that is in the afterlife. And like, I'm sitting there and I'm getting emotional. I've been a big emotion, Frank, lately. Me too. I don't know what's in the water. I don't know either.
Starting point is 00:06:56 I think this is how like Russia and trying to get us. You know what I think? I think it's the cucklib soy boys. It is the cuck. That they've infected us. And now we're. Too much veganism. That's what it is.
Starting point is 00:07:06 And now. Not enough red meat, not enough drop shipping or stocks. Joe Biden is so invested in soy and now we're all getting like super emotional for it. Yeah, I think that's what's going on. That's how they do, they come for the men first. I've cried a lot this year, Elson. Bro, I cried, I told you,
Starting point is 00:07:20 I cried with the pacifier thing with Ruby. Well, that's a cryable offense. I would be a mess. It was pretty cryable. But watching Deadpool 2, he's talking about, you know, meeting his, someone is talking about meeting someone in the afterlife. And I'm getting emotional. And I said, I was like, it's hard for me to say this,
Starting point is 00:07:34 but like, I'm struggling with the idea that like, if we die, like we might never see each other again. I'm saying this to Becca. And I'm imagining she's gonna be like, sincere and sweet. Did she shit on you? So I'm imagining she's gonna be sincere and sweet. Like at first she's like, yeah, well like you don't,
Starting point is 00:07:52 you know, what do you believe in? And I was like, honestly, I don't know. I think I'm finding out I'm more agnostic. And she goes, I was like, yeah, like, I don't even know where we're gonna be. And she goes, I know where I'll be. And I was like, am I going to hell? That was the big guy told you? She's like, I know where I'll be and I was like, am I going to hell? That was the big guy told you?
Starting point is 00:08:06 She's like, I know where I'll be. And I was like, God fucking damn. So I guess I now I need to get my soul saved. Oh my God, go to the South and get dunked in a river. If we do basement yard experience shows, which I don't know, honestly, they might be out, but if we do a show and it happens to be within the southern bible belt part of the United States can we go to like a like you can't just do a walk
Starting point is 00:08:30 in baptism you can do you can walk into a church and say save me they're gonna fucking roll out the red white carpet whatever the carpets are for Jesus I actually don't know bro and then they're gonna like fucking like and you're gonna be like Oh my god I would commit to the bits Have you ever seen the video of the girl going She's in like one of those big churches And she goes I haven't had no sex
Starting point is 00:08:56 And then everyone starts clapping And she's just like And then she just starts running Really? And running down the aisle My favorite clip that has ever come out of any of those churches is the I'm not gay no more. Gay man being like, I'm not gay no more. I'm delivered.
Starting point is 00:09:15 I don't like mens no more. I'm like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, an interview with him 10 years after, he's like, I am happily married to a man. Gay as hell. Yeah, but yeah, she fucking like told me I might go to hell. Nice. You need that. Do I? It's like, she keeps you honest.
Starting point is 00:09:35 You know what? She's like, hey, get better, you know, or like have a, start getting a relationship. Well, you know what? Maybe after that line, maybe she's, yeah, maybe she's below. Speaking of gay, the whales are gay So that's right something that we just found out recently on Twitter
Starting point is 00:09:49 I was scrolling and all of a sudden they're like by the way humpback whales gay and I was like what finally I told you it's in the water. Wait. Oh, wait, do they have? butts Apparently they were fucking gay fucking yeah, how do I just let's just call it sex Well, it's yeah, it's gay sex right they were like humpback whales for the first time in recorded history gay Whaleness were being we're just fucking each other's butts. I'm gonna look this up. So like this is this is I love this humpback whales caught enjoying gay sex romp got him
Starting point is 00:10:27 You were trying to do it in private. We had a dive. Yeah, we got we got you two gay balls. I Just love like now Yo, yeah Yeah, yeah, and it looks like a little little interracial Look at that. Little interracial? Looks like two different shades of whale dude. Gay interracial.
Starting point is 00:10:50 I don't think whales have races. They just have species. I'm being comedy funny. I know, I know. I'm being comedy funny. Fuck. But yeah, it does look like we're knocking down walls. Barriers. Multiple here. Love this. So interracial, gay shit. Let's be honest. It does look like we're knocking down walls barriers multiple here love this so now racial gay
Starting point is 00:11:05 Let's be honest shit sounds like some of the cooler animals we have on this planet are gay Honestly, if I had to pick one of the species of whale to be gay humpback. Yeah, it's like broke backs It's in the it's in the name. It's in the name. Are you kidding me? But now now we have confirmed cases of whales dogs dogs Penguins weird. Yeah, but weird I was getting on the Elevator this morning when I had Charlie and there was a guy he had a dog and he was like I was like, oh is he like friendly and he's a gaze friendly too friendly. He might be gay
Starting point is 00:11:40 I was like I was like, what the fuck? He said, I don't even know you. Yeah. I was like, what? This guy's outing his dog. His dog probably looked up and he was like, bitch. He's like, yo, what the fuck? He's like, yeah, real friendly, could be gay.
Starting point is 00:11:51 I was like, what did that even begin to mean? Don't you hate when people try to be like hyper, they look at you and they think like now is the time to be like hyper bro. And they just think like, I, that drives me up a wall when they try to do like hyper stereotypical, like bro bro bro code You know fucking like oh tits and it's like dude. What are you doing new development here? I'm sorry
Starting point is 00:12:11 This is this is this is breaking news breaking news breaking news with the gay whales a healthy adult man This is what the caption is dude. Okay a healthy adult is dude okay a healthy adult adult what the fuck am I saying a healthy adult male humpback was observed penetrating a weak and injured male humpback oh no this doesn't sound doesn't sound like well doesn't sound I mean hey it could be love there are humans that are injured sexual you know activities with injured other humans I yeah but when you define them as injured and weak that sounds that humans that engage in sexual activities with injured other humans. I, yeah. But when you define them as injured and weak, that sounds, that doesn't sound- Yeah, and also weak and in- like now you're writing a porn title.
Starting point is 00:12:53 You know what I mean? Little weak injured whale gets blowhole blown to bits. Big, big, big- Little weak injured humpback gets blown to bits. Big hung humpback goes after innocent little tight blowhole. You might as well, who wrote this? The fucking big hunky humpback with large dung dung penetrates the blowhole of a little tight white barely legal humpback whale injured. BANG BANG Gone wrong.
Starting point is 00:13:30 HAHAHAHA Insane dude. POV, humpback cock. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHAHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA destroys Little innocent little teeny tiny blowhole of an injured weak helpless bitch 24 New York Post there you go scientists believe that the healthy male may have penetrated the ailing male in a show of dominance Damn, so this wasn't this is a full- on not love. It's a male dominating male. Feels like a- It's like a don't, don't, don't, don't even say it. But it feels like something else.
Starting point is 00:14:14 What is wine made of? Right. You know, just throw that out there. Fermented that takeaway. We're on one, yeah. You know. That's what it feels like. And that's fucked up because I thought this was love. I don't, I, you know that's what it feels like and that's fucked up because I thought this was love
Starting point is 00:14:26 I don't I you know what I was gonna be so happy for like gay love and Like you know like equality when it's like see like it's in nature, too Yeah, it's in nature all these people that he's like is not natural fucking being in pong Yeah, no, it's in the real world But now this is not now once once the Bible Belt gets ahold of this, it's gonna be like, see, I told you what Biden's putting in that fucking water,
Starting point is 00:14:51 him and the Clintons, they conspired to make sure that humpback whales and the frogs, Alex Jones, as minute he gets ahold of this, it's over. Yeah. The frogs are gay! Scientists do not know of similar similar sexual behavior would or has occurred between two healthy male humpbacks But sexual encounters between same-sex pairs have been documented in a wide range of species including other marine mammals like walruses
Starting point is 00:15:17 common bottlenose dolphins killer whales and gray seals so That's crazy. I just... Walruses kind of look a little like... A little hunky. Like a bear. Like a bear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you little scruffy with big teeth. Hell yeah. Hell yeah, bro.
Starting point is 00:15:36 You know what I mean? Just like... Walruses are fucking wild though. You ever see them fight? They fucking just tusk each other. What are those for? You can't chill with that. They they they have to like hunt Well, how do they they're also probably for defense because they're big chunky babes Yeah, so, you know, there are some polar bears or someone out there like damn I get a walrus. I'll eat for a week Yeah, well, they don't longer. Well, no, they eat a lot
Starting point is 00:15:59 They like 600 pounds of food a day or some holy fuck I. I could buy, just so you know, just so you know, threw that number out there with zero scientific backing. 600, it's probably insanely wrong. Just what animal were you saying? A polar bear. Polar bear. How much a polar bear is eat a day? Yeah, oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:24 I know that laugh I am off baby Four and a half pounds of fat in a day all right hey Listen sometimes you miss the shots if you're not dribbling and taking them you know what I'm saying That's not it doesn't apply to you making shit up. I Could have been right and you would have been astonished with me knowing that 600 pounds is an insane amount It's a lot of food. I don't know that you could anything can eat that. Oh I mean if you're like a blue whale 600 pounds a krill I
Starting point is 00:17:04 Get they got huge mouths. They do. Dude, I went down a rabbit hole one day with whales. Yeah, you just look at them big mouths. No. Big humpback gaping mouth, filled by little innocent, tinky-tweeny krill. Little crawfish stands no chance of Ben's big whale mouth
Starting point is 00:17:29 No, no What was I say? Oh, I saw a rabbit hole of mouths. Well, no, I didn't but I saw a video Which I appreciated but I was also like why does this exist it was Explaining and like it was like a cartoon showing what would happen if you Found yourself in the mouth of a whale Like what would happen you'd get swallowed? Yeah, and like but like along the way and I could describe you grab on anything. I Guess you could try but like I'm scratching the whole way down. Yeah, I mean Dude, we whales throw up?
Starting point is 00:18:05 Probably not. Everything throws up. You gotta imagine it. Yeah, if you got a throat. Yeah, if you got a throat, you throw. Yeah. They were describing like the tongue or whatever and then like getting to the stomach
Starting point is 00:18:17 and this would like, this acid would burn your bones. I don't know, some shit like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, you'd be like- I watched it though and I was like, not me. Like I'll get out. No, you wouldn't, no you would not. those videos and people getting swallowed by like fucking whales trying to crawl For whom this is why this is why people that go kayaking on like the open ocean. Oh, that's insane You deserve every every bit of murder coming there some like I believe very hot guy
Starting point is 00:18:42 Who's like in Australia or New Zealand or something and he goes out in a car and on like a canoe I guess or a kayak that's see-through nope and he sees all kinds of shit no no no and he sees like sea snakes which why are you there yeah like be a snake if you're gonna be a be a land snake Don't don't yeah Don't do this out in the fucking water with the shit but then also whales and like other animals and shit like it's and He's just like out there with them. I saw I saw someone the other day
Starting point is 00:19:16 I saw someone the other day posting a thing we actually brought the kids to the aquarium last week and I saw someone posting and it was like them in a kayak and they're like, oh my God, this is so cool. And it's a family of orcas surrounding them. Fuck that. Bro, not cool. Not cool.
Starting point is 00:19:35 Not cool because you are then guess what? A treat, you're a little fucking dangly little beep, beep, beep, you're a little hanging in front of their door. You're that carrot on the stick in front, you know what I'm saying? Like you are dead. I don't know that expression. Never heard this expression like dangling a carrot
Starting point is 00:19:49 in front of someone. Who's chasing carrots? I love carrots. Wouldn't be hard to kidnap Frank, just leave fucking carrots all over the side. I was on Xbox last night, and I was out there with someone, and they were like,
Starting point is 00:20:01 you still on your like holistic journey? If you are, I got a great granola bar for you. I was like, fucking no, I'll stick to eggs. And they were like, you still on your holistic journey? If you are, I got a great granola bar for you. I was like, fucking no, I'll stick to eggs. And they were like, so what do you eat to snack? And I was like, carrots. And someone just comes in and they were like, are you a fucking rabbit? I love carrots, dude.
Starting point is 00:20:14 Someone asked you if you were on your holistic journey? Yeah, cause last time I had spoken to them on Xbox, we were just kind of sharing like, you know, like healthy foods back and forth. Okay. It doesn't holistic not mean that? Yeah, no. Well, I think you know just like healthy shit you know. Going back to the internet baby. Holistic babe.
Starting point is 00:20:37 Holistic relating to or concerned with holes? No. Like holes. Or with complete systems rather than with the individual parts. I know further now. Like holes? Or with complete systems rather than with the individual parts. I know further now. Like I don't know what that means. It's not, it has nothing to do with what I'm- Holistic meaning in simple terms. It means encompassing the whole of a thing.
Starting point is 00:20:56 That doesn't make sense. And not just a part. Holistic medicine looks at the whole person for answers. Oh, a whole with a W. Yeah. I'm thinking holistic with an H. Yeah, I'm saying whole, yeah. Yeah?
Starting point is 00:21:09 Yeah, wait. What? I'm saying holistic is with the H. Yeah. But whole, when I say whole, it's W, like the whole thing. Yeah. So it's saying like, holistic means encompassing of
Starting point is 00:21:22 the whole of the thing. Did I say holistic? I meant like health. Yeah, but that's, I'm saying Did I say holistic? I meant like health. Yeah, but that's, I'm saying, I don't think it's like health. What's the health word? I thought holistic was like spiritual healing or something. Oh, I just thought it was just like, just pure, like pure and healthy.
Starting point is 00:21:36 I don't, maybe. You might have heard of holistic medicine, which tries to treat someone as mind, body, instead of treating only the part of the patient that is most sick Okay, so maybe that could mean what you're saying. Maybe I don't know. It's like if you I gotta be honest We've gotten to a point in this conversation. I Don't care. I honestly don't care Understanding what it means because I thought it meant like fucking like, you know monks and shit
Starting point is 00:22:03 I don't care but like you know, I mean? I have some questions for you now Roger I don't know if there is evidence of this stuff But if you're gonna pick three more animals to record being gay to like help like be like yeah see being gay is natural Yeah Which ones you picking? Ssssss They gotta be cool ones too. I don't want to hear about like an antelope
Starting point is 00:22:23 Elephants? Love that. Love a big gay elephant. Tigers, tigers. I think cats have been known to be gay. Okay. Like lions. Are they?
Starting point is 00:22:33 I think they're gay lions. Gorillas. I believe there's also gay monkeys. Well, I don't have a Rolodex of which ones have done. I'm just naming animals. All right, so what was the first one you said? Elephants, that's a good one. Yeah. Sharks. Give me a gay great one you said elephants? That's a good one. Yeah sharks
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Starting point is 00:25:17 get all our tickets from SeatGeek and it's great because on there, if you go on the app and you click on the thing you want to go to, it'll show you the stadium and everything is color-coded. You know, the dark red ones and the app and you click on the thing you want to go to it'll show you the stadium and everything is color-coded You know the dark red ones and the red ones you kind of want to stay away from And the dark green ones and the green ones are like good prices for that ticket So I like knowing that I'm getting a good price and there's some sort of transparency there There's a number one ticket number one rated ticketing app in the apps are with over 28 million downloads, which is Just wild and we can save you some money here
Starting point is 00:25:49 You will get $20 off of some tickets for the your first purchase when you use the code basement, okay, so go download that Seakeek app and Use the code basement for that $20 off of your first purchase. Okay, get out there. Let the Sun hit your face and Enjoy folks. All right Seakeek can use that code basement $20 off of your first purchase. Okay. Get out there. Let the sun hit your face and, uh, enjoy folks. All right Seeky can use that code basement $20 off. Enjoy And then babes, you know what you should do. Hey call on me teach go to patreon.com slash the basement yard And what what do you know? For some reason you haven't heard me talk about this before
Starting point is 00:26:24 Let me uh, let me key in. Let me school you a little bit. Okay. Well, Patreon is, you know, our page where you could support us. And how do you do that? By signing up, sign up for that first year. Well, we'll, we'll give you something in it as a reward. You get these weekly episodes. Ooh, ooh, ooh, one week in advance.
Starting point is 00:26:39 And that second tier you sign up for that. Not only do you get that, but then you also get bam. Exclusive episodes every single Friday. You can go from being a nobody to the MBB most balling as patron. You know what I'm talking about? So go check it out. Patreon.com slash the basement yard. And if for some reason your teeny tiny little fingers are hurting the P on your web, uh, you know, your, your keyboard isn't working. All you have to do is go to the basement yard.com babes. You can go on there and that's the hub. That's our little hub.
Starting point is 00:27:06 That's our big hub. That's where you can find everything to do with us. You could find our merch store. You could find links to the Patreon. And also you could sign up, if it's not out at this point in time, and get newsletter information. That's right, emails about upcoming shows.
Starting point is 00:27:20 Maybe we will be near you. Maybe we will be within, you know, a couple hours. You never know, but you want to check it out. Go to thebasementyard.com. Go to patreon.com slash the basement yard. Thank you. Thank you so much to all of our friends and Patrons and people that continue to support us go check it out. You give it a gift to the patreon It's always a good gift to give to birthday ideas. What you gonna do want to be a baller shot caller or a patreon? Do that. All right back to Joey One day one day I'm gonna get you to go.
Starting point is 00:27:49 That was good. I feel like I have said that. I don't think so. I think I'd remember something like that. Oh, yeah, because it means so much. Don't, you're not supposed to tell me what means a lot to me. I'm not saying that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:04 What did you just say? Yeah. Yeah, that was it. By the way, you know, I would like to talk about, I don't know if you have seen it, I'm pulling it up. Uh oh, uh oh. But the video of the girl crying outside of the Taylor Swift concert.
Starting point is 00:28:18 You know, I've seen, I think, someone react into it. I hope you're nice about it because I feel like I'm not. You're not gonna be nice, oh boy. I said that I'm not nice I heard this was a topic I heard this was a topic of conversation I heard like I saw like a reaction to it, but I didn't see the thing itself Are you pulling it up? Here's what's okay. Is it what background do I need to know? Give me back in background info. Give me the back. Give me back of it. Oh, can I
Starting point is 00:28:44 It's a girl who is like sitting outside I think this was in like Australia or something. Okay. What the fuck was that? Oh you know what it is. When it's in certain places you like if I were to say it was in Alabama you'd go oh all right. I don't even know. It comes with it comes with some baggage. I don't know how to interpret that. But it was it was in uh I think, Australia or something like that. And the girl was sitting outside with her two friends, I think outside of the stadium, because she couldn't go to it.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Because I heard that people do this. They can't get into the stadium, so they tailgate, and they just listen to the music, because it's so loud. Which is like, good. Honestly, way smarter than going to the show. Dude, when you go out to Jones Beach, and if you're at the beach, there's like a day cut or I think maybe when they do soundcheck or something You can hear perfectly from the beach. I haven't been at Jones Beach in 15 years, maybe honestly well
Starting point is 00:29:35 Learn something new she did cry pretty fucking hard, and I'm just gonna. I'm just gonna play okay, but no context Oh, there was a song that came on that like meant a lot to her. Okay. And she got emotional. But she got emotional. Okay, all right, let me hear this. I'm off, hold on, let me just play it.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Oh, my volume's off, so forgive me. Look at this this podcasting 101 There's the song she doesn't know yet, you'll know when she knows Sounds like Creed. Ready? Not done. Bro, I'm like getting emotional. That's an insane- I'm like getting emotional that's an insane I'm getting emotional
Starting point is 00:30:45 that's a wild reaction and look you can't do that you set it up to be funny bitch I what do you mean the song means a lot to her you that's all you know I looked up because I was like me I hope that I'm not gonna you're gonna get you're gonna get this girl And so I was I want to offend too much if it like there's something connected to it But I also think that like that's a wild reaction for like anything connection. You know what I mean I have you know I swear to God when I heard that that like in my heart is like if you find like a loved one Dead on the floor like after getting hit by a truck. Yeah my heart is like, if you find like a loved one dead on the floor, like after getting hit by a truck.
Starting point is 00:31:27 Yeah, I was gonna say, if you watched with your eyes, one of your relatives gets steamrolled and just flat. Oh, like literally steamrolled. By a steamroller. By a legit steamroller. Like that's like a reaction that I would have, that feels. That is a hard cry You know it sounds like you ever see the the sound bit on tik-tok and it's like it looks like a somewhere in Europe cop
Starting point is 00:31:51 He's like No You've never seen that shit No, but what? Those when Trump got elected no not the woman that was crying. It's like, it's an- it's like a white guy- OHHH! It's a reenactment, that guy! Is it that guy? It's like a white guy and his eyes are like-
Starting point is 00:32:12 Yes, yes. But like fucking popping out of his head. No, yeah, no, that guy does reenactments where he like pretends that his child has drowned in a pool and he has his kid like- This guy. Pretend he's drowning. a pool and he has his kid like pretend he's drowning. You know what that's good that you said that because I thought I saw that and I was just
Starting point is 00:32:34 like who recorded this poor man in the most like. From a tree. Yeah from a tree. Like the most like emotionally charged moment. No he makes these wild reenactments where it's like oh you just found your child drowning in a pool and it's like who's this for who? Was this I don't even want to put myself in the brain capacity to think of something like that one thing I will say about this girl. I think that she's very nice. All right. Oh, here we go. This is this is deleted
Starting point is 00:32:57 She's I'm sure she's really nice. No, no torture. No, I'm not torturing anybody not torturing torch Oh, no, no, I'm not gonna do that either Why do you go torture first? I heard you said torture. I said torture. I thought you said torture but I thought I I hear songs and the shit makes me cry. It definitely happens. I Don't know if I've ever cried like that. That's a that's a wild. Have you ever cried like that? And listen to not not not maybe when I was a toddler and I was driving a fucking fit and I'm a sensitive bitch I am right
Starting point is 00:33:31 there I am a full I'm being honest finger on the emotional pulse here I am a bitch full stop well I mean don't say that because then that is okay and people equating feeling emotions to acting like, you know, feeling lesser than. So stop that. How about you're in touch with your emotions, bitch. First of all, you just call me a bitch. I'm not in touch. I'm in bed cuddling.
Starting point is 00:33:56 Yeah, you're face fucking your emotions. Yeah. Oh yeah, okay. Your finger in your emotion. I'm reaming them, dude. Ooh, big. Ooh. But yeah. Big white Tampa, big white big white baseball cowboy face fucks such hardship.
Starting point is 00:34:13 But my idea is I watch that video and I'm like, what are we doing? Yeah. Here's the thing, and you know how I've said this about other things in the past? It's staged. It's staged. I in the past It's staged It's staged. I don't it's staged. She claimed that's not okay
Starting point is 00:34:36 They were filming though, but you staged that for a very specific reason you had to have known you had to have known and like It's staged like it is it is staged like that's that's the part that gets me is like listen You want to react that way you feel so passionate about something whether regardless of whatever the reason is feel it But then if you're gonna record it and put it out there That's where it gets that's where the cynic in me takes over and I'm just like that's where I think it's a little bit Of bullshit now listen if this person wants to say like I want to you know Allow people to feel comfortable feeling their emotions fine that's that was a show if that's why they put it out there she claims it's not a show I read
Starting point is 00:35:10 her Rolling Stone interview I skimmed Rolling Stone interview yeah they did what she went she went insanely viral because everyone's like look at this fucking idiot Adam Levine the Rolling Stones Yeah Kim Kardashian and this person this girl she's crying yes, but they interviewed her and She just said cuz I was like looking it up to be like all right if this is like connected to something like really serious then like Maybe I won't like but I mean I think I was burning it up regardless But like I think you know whatever at least I would know that going in like okay Let's cut her some slack here. This is like but in the interview
Starting point is 00:35:47 she just says like it's a song that means a lot to her and like It like helps distract her or whatever and to be fair She did say in that interview that she like also thinks like it's funny You know like she's a good sport about it that look at me. I'm being a psycho good good I mean, I'm sure she just had to have I don't even know what song it was I've had to have I'm sure she's had to have thick skin because people probably saw that and immediately started cyberbullying her which is wrong don't do that unless you're Joey he could take it I'm not loves taking it I will just say this first of all I just said I'm very
Starting point is 00:36:20 sensitive I am full-on in agreement if something means that much to you be have a connection with it that's fine that's wild you're close I'm very sensitive. I am full on in agreement if something means that much to you Be have a connection with it. That's fine. That's wild. You're close. I have very strong connections to songs None that would elicit that response. What would you do? I'll be honest with you If you had that reaction to something other than like the death of someone very close because even one of your aunts and uncles I'd be like chill what? because even one of your aunts and uncles, I'd be like, chill. What the fuck? It would have to be a very, very, very close relative. Or if you had some sort of Peter Parker and Mayra, like relationship with your aunt,
Starting point is 00:36:52 then like boiler brother. What? Spoiler alert. Spider-Man came out in 1901, probably. We know the story. I believe it's 16. Here's another spoiler. He's a photographer. It's Peter Parker. Yeah, yeah, fair, fair, fair, fair, fair. Yeah, I would be a little, I'd get a little second-hand.
Starting point is 00:37:10 I'd do like the rub on your back and just be like, chill, chill. Yeah. Like you'd get like a, you'd get a moment of just like, oh, are you all right? And then it would immediately turn into like fucking stop. I'd be like, but just this, right? It's just, shh.
Starting point is 00:37:23 You're making a scene, you're making a scene. Yeah, yeah. You know what, so I've heard, I hate scenes. Bro, I've It's just like shh. You're making a scene, you're making a scene. Like, you know what, so I've heard Todd. I hate scenes, I hate scenes. I've heard toddlers react like that. Yeah. One of, Bekah and I were still, were we engaged at the time? No, I think we were just still dating at the time.
Starting point is 00:37:37 And we took, we went to a restaurant with Miles. I think it was for like her dad's engagement, engagement, her dad's engagement engagement her retirement party and On the way he was such a nightmare at this restaurant miles Yeah But like he was also old enough to know not to do stuff like you give kids a bit of a break because they're kids But like he was just like really really tough So we were on the drive home and he was just throwing the fucking fit to end all fits like just just
Starting point is 00:38:03 Just going nuts. And I'm driving the car and he had this pack of tic tacs that his grandmother got him. Oh, please tell me what you're about to tell me. And he wanted him so bad and she's crying. So Becca is, I can see in her face because I'm sure you'll, if you don't already know this, you will learn this. Children's screaming does something differently for men and women. Children's screaming for men, it's like an instant, it's like an instant of like, I can help,
Starting point is 00:38:30 and then it's immediately like, you're fucking annoying. For women, it's all the time, like, nurture, I wanna help. And it's like nails on a chalkboard for them. And he's like screaming, crying, just throwing like, ah, like that. Because he wants to take time No because because we told him we were gonna go to his grandmother's after the restaurant And then we said we're not because of how bad he was what flavor take tax by the way. It was a multi-pack
Starting point is 00:38:54 green huge red yellow orange orange is the one the best one and He's just and I see Becca out of the corner my eyes She's starting to fume and she goes miles and then it gets quiet and she grabs the tic tacs and she looks at him shakes them Rolls down the window Launches it out the window. That's so so ganger, bro. I tell I always tell this story She's a great mom But I tell this story and I'm like I felt so much harder in love with you that day Cuz that was some thug shit and he's a full pack though
Starting point is 00:39:30 full He screamed like that Because she threw them out Like what like just fucking Unloaded tic-tacs unloaded it was fucking it was great. Unloaded, it was fucking, it was great. But that's like that as a toddler, that's an appropriate response. This is a fully grown.
Starting point is 00:39:50 That's a grown woman. It's fully grown. Well, I don't know how old this person is. She's 20, I believe. Okay, then kind of grown. Full, I would say. Close to full. I mean.
Starting point is 00:40:00 90% full. Women mature at different rates than men do. Would you have called. Quicker. Well, yeah, way quicker, but but also would you have called yourself fully mature by 25? Hell yeah, I would have said that I would be ton ton dream Happen to you? Where'd you go? I tried to say totally I would be Tundri
Starting point is 00:40:32 Tundri Bro, and you like said yourself Bro, I would be a Tundri I said it twice I think What is wrong with me man? No, I would be a tangerine. I said it twice. I think Now we're totally wrong. Yeah, exactly and fucking 15. I was probably like I know what I'm doing Yeah, you know is there any song what's the closest a song would have to having you react that way? Chain hang low by jibs
Starting point is 00:41:04 No, maybe you but no no no if you buck freestyle rap from Lil Wayne Don't say it's a rap from Lil Wayne and sound 400 years old seriously What is a song that if you throw it on right now, it'll get you teary-eyed Give me as minutes to think about that, but we do have some more sponsors for today. We have Give me a minute to think about that, but we do have some more sponsors for today. Bingo! We have... We have BetterHelp. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp.
Starting point is 00:41:31 BetterHelp is online therapy. If you want to do therapy, I think you should. Even if you don't, I think you should anyway, because I think that it's helpful for everyone. I think everyone should be doing it, especially in the current climate of the world, okay? I've been in therapy for a couple of years. No shame in that. Get in there, talk to your therapist. Maybe leak some tears out of your eyes every once in a while.
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Starting point is 00:43:45 each week. So it's a lot of fun. A lot of my friends play it. They love it. I've played it a bunch of times. I love it as well. I think it's a lot of fun and it's easy to understand. So if you don't know a lot about, you know, sports or any of these fantasy apps or anything like that, this is just more or less against the projection. You're not playing against any other pros or anything like that. It's just more or less than these projections. So it's very easy to understand and it's a lot of fun. It makes watching sports more fun. And you can download the app today and use the code basement for a first deposit match up to $100. Okay, that means if you put in $100, they'll put in $100 and you have $200 to play with. And it's not just $100, you put in $20, they'll put in $20, you got $40
Starting point is 00:44:23 to play with. So it's just like that. So download the app, use that code BASEMENT to get that first deposit match up to $100. Enjoy. And uh. So my question. Yeah, what were you asking me? What song is the one that would get you the closest
Starting point is 00:44:40 to having an emotional reaction like that? If any song, cause that's a big task. The song from Toy Story. Oh, the fucking Sarah McLachlan? When somebody loves you, everything was beautiful. That shit. That shit gets you.
Starting point is 00:45:01 But like, if I just hear the song, that's one thing. But to watch the video of the doll being like, you're growing up. And then she gets so excited. I kid you not, I'm getting goosebumps. Nah bro, I can. She's getting so excited because she puts her hand down to look for it.
Starting point is 00:45:14 Yeah. You ever heard the conspiracy that that girl was Andy's mom? Because at the end of the movie. Yo, my whole body just lit up. Right? At the end of the movie. Why do you start with your nipples there?
Starting point is 00:45:24 Did I? I went like this. You say you like my whole body. First of right at the end of the movie. Why do you start with your nipples there? Did I I went like this you you say you're like my whole body first of all my nipples aren't there mine are oh your thumbs I would go like this if anything well you just brought your fingertips to your thumbs I wasn't doing that but the the conspiracy is that At the end of the movie because she has like a like the girl has like similar attributes like you know I'm granted they all kind of look the same in Toy Story the human characters at least at the end of the movie, because she has like a, like the girl has like similar attributes, like, you know, I mean, granted, they all kind of look the same in Toy Story, the human characters at least, but she has similar attributes to the girl,
Starting point is 00:45:50 like that had Jessie. And then at the end of the movie, when Jessie's like super happy, her mom was just like, hey, I had one of those growing up. Oh my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I got two songs I could think of that get me.
Starting point is 00:46:03 That shit makes me mad sad though. Like dogs, not dogs, what am I saying? Like the toys when they're like, oh, you don't wanna play with me anymore? Nah. And remember we talked about the Toys R Us thing? We were like, oh, I guess there's no more Toys R Us kids. They're all grown up.
Starting point is 00:46:18 Bro, I almost cried. I kid you not, I almost cried about like two weeks ago because I was, Maeve was sleeping sleeping which I was very happy about and then Ruby and miles were sitting on the floor playing with Megazords and I just look over and I was like goddamn Yeah, and then on the TV was a spider-man show that Ruby loves to watch and I was just like fuck Yes, but two songs two songs that get me there. Okay Well, all right two songs and apart from a movie, cause yours was kinda more about apart from a movie, but like,
Starting point is 00:46:47 Yeah, yeah. The opening to Up, Son. Stab, turn, turn, up, down, this way, that way, it guts me completely. Yeah, yeah. Uh, there's nothing left. My insides are on the floor. Old people...
Starting point is 00:47:00 fucking kills me. I could stare at an old person and cry. Really? For some reason. That's kind of fucked No, like when all the oh this poor fucking old bastard No, but like especially when they're upset about something like old people being upset like murders me Like that's like in my top three. Yeah, I like an old person being like, I you know
Starting point is 00:47:20 I look at a lot of them. I look at a lot of them and just go Where were they during the civil rights movement, you know what I look at a lot of them, I look at a lot of them and just go, ah, but where were they during the civil rights movement? You know what I'm saying? You know what I mean? Where are you on the right side of history? Where are you on? I don't want to be sad for a fucking racist. Yeah, were you?
Starting point is 00:47:33 Two songs that get me there. You ready? One, Vienna by Billy Joel. It's a great song. Gets me. Slow down, you're doing fine. You know what gets me even more about that song? And I'm gonna like seriously seriously like try not to get
Starting point is 00:47:46 choked up talking about it is I looked up what the song means and Billy Joel said that like his dad always envisioned retiring and going and living in Vienna because apparently in Vienna it's like it's an old person you just like sweep your lawn and you just live a happy life and like the story this whole song is about like, just like enjoy like your youth, like slow down. Like Vienna is gonna wait, like your happiness, your retirement will wait for you. I don't, oh my God, gets me every time.
Starting point is 00:48:12 Two, recent edition. It's a good song. Not really, it's been out for a number of years, but. Fuck, what's the name of it? It's the, it's from the new A Star Is Born, not Shallow. It's the one, I'll always remember us this way. I don't know that song. Oh!
Starting point is 00:48:33 The air is on the sky, bing, bing, burning in your eyes, bing, bing, and look at me, and babe I wanna get on fire. Let Her Go used to make me cry let her go. Which one is that? Well, you only need the light when it's burning. Oh get the fuck out of here It hits me what what don't tell me what documentary song made you cry you fucking also fix you by Coldplay that she used to get Me to fix you You don't remember that I don't remember that one it It was like in the 9-Eleven movie.
Starting point is 00:49:06 I got, Jesus Joey. I saw a TikTok the other day, you see this TikTok trend where people would just describe the ultimate, you just had to be there to get it. And someone said 9-Eleven? It was a swipe and it was just 9-Eleven. And I was like, that's so fucked up. I love when people say, oh the song Imagine by John Lennon. I'm like, that song sucks song imagined by John Lennon. I'm like song sucks No, that's always great. But I will say this gal Gadot ruin that song. Yeah, of course
Starting point is 00:49:30 She like yo imagine was like I guess this is a hot that's a good song It's not a bad song, but it's like the way that it's revered. I'm like, it's not that crazy to me I think John Lennon wrote better songs. I mean Name another name another John Lennon song he wrote that's better, Joey. Frank, I have other things to do right now. Don't name one. I just feel like you wrote another one. Which one?
Starting point is 00:49:52 Yeah, exactly. No, I just think that when Gal Gadot and Kristen Wiig and other celebrities try to put out this heartfelt thing on social media during COVID, when people are fucking losing their family members and the first thing, the first thing, I understand what the song is about. The first thing that Gal Gadot looks in the camera and says is like, imagine there's no heaven. And it's like, come on, Gal.
Starting point is 00:50:14 Come on. Come on, Gal. What's your name? It's not Gal. Gal. Can't be Gal. Gal. Short for Gallant.
Starting point is 00:50:24 Gallant, her name is Gallant. I was looking up like- Look it up, look it up. What's Gal's first name? I'll say Gal Gadot. Come on. Hmm? It's Gal, all right.
Starting point is 00:50:36 And she's Gal, huh? She's Gal. She's Israeli, she's Israeli. She was Miss Israel. She was, yeah, and she was also like a special forces. There's some stuff about her political affiliation. Maybe we shouldn't get into it, but you know. But they all, if you're an Israeli woman, you have to serve in the IDF.
Starting point is 00:50:50 I know, but she like made her way through the ranks. Sneakily? You know, I'm not gonna sit here and pontificate on it. Oh, you're throwing one of those words out there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I liked all the songs that make you cry and like none of them are really that good. Dude, but that song from Stars Born, listen to it when you get the chance. Because it's just like right now like where we are in our life
Starting point is 00:51:13 I'm gonna remember this like I'm gonna remember us like just as we are right now and there's a part of the song where she's like fuck I can't remember it but it was like. I've cried to a lot of Noah Khan songs so I know you don't know who he is. I don't I don't I'm sorry. I'm not discrediting him. I've cried to a lot of Noah Con songs, which I know you don't know who he is. I don't, I don't, I'm sorry. I'm not discrediting him, I just think you're an idiot, not him. He's incredible. But like, and I'm all choked up and I can't find the words every time you say goodbye, baby, it hurts.
Starting point is 00:51:33 And it's just like, ooh. And then there's one part where she's like, a part of me that's you will never die. And I'm just like, ffff. Criss cross, applesauce, shoot me in the fucking asshole. And like. Ha ha ha. Just kill me right there. Chris Cross, Applesauce, shoot me in the fucking asshole. Just kill me right there.
Starting point is 00:51:47 You know, there's another song by John Mayer called You're Gonna Live Forever With Me, that also made me cry. Oh, I need to hear that. It's a good one. Because, you know, like, I have music that reminds me of my family, you know, and I'm trying to put together a playlist of all the songs. I'm still trying to find one for Maeve because she's been a hard one year old.
Starting point is 00:52:07 I mean, give it some time. Give it some time. When she goes away to college, you'll cry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like, got my song for Miles, Ruby, my mom, Becca. You know what's gonna happen? You're gonna cry the most for Maeve because she's the hardest.
Starting point is 00:52:21 Like, you're gonna have this thing where it's like, she's put you through hell or whatever the fuck and then eventually you're gonna have this like thing where it's like she she's put you through like hell or whatever the fuck and then eventually you're gonna be like You're gonna look back on it like way more fondly than now and I think it's gonna make you But it's gonna you know, I I'm very excited for you to have children because I'll just be crying the The love, like there's physically, I know there's a Greek word for it,
Starting point is 00:52:48 but like you cannot, the word love just doesn't fit. Agapimou? But like, no, there's like philophilia and stuff like that. Like there's different words of love in the Greek language. They mean different things. Like one is like romantic love, one is brotherly love, one is like familiar love, one is like romantic love one is brotherly love one is like familiar love one is like children love I Am like well, where do you think the word pedophilia comes from?
Starting point is 00:53:12 lover of children You don't remember that and Sasha Baron Cohen show we are America and he's like we want to take this word back Yeah, just like I'm not fucking doing that. That is the craziest thing I've ever seen in my entire life. That show, yeah, it's pretty nuts. That was wild. Also, I mean, this isn't really funny, but I just kinda wanna bring it up because you just,
Starting point is 00:53:37 Uh-oh. You said the word, put it up. But I saw this video and it's so fucking disturbing and I kinda just wanna say it just so, I guess people kind of keep this in mind. I don't know. There was a TikTok account that it's like this little girl. Uh oh. Do I want to hear this? No, there's nothing crazy that's happening. Nothing happened to her.
Starting point is 00:53:58 You can't go from talking about... Well, it kind of goes with that. So like there's a TikTok account where it's like this girl and her mother and she's like this cute little girl and she's probably like four or something like that. And there's all these like videos that she posts about her and they have mad followers and shit. And there are certain videos where there's something like just a little off, you know, like there's a video, like if you go on the page and you scroll,
Starting point is 00:54:27 there was a video of her holding two apples like this, the little girl, and that one has like a bunch of like saves. And then like the comments are like, dudes. So it's like, you know what I mean? Like, you know what I'm saying here you don't see what I'm saying here? There's a lot of that going on. Let me explain to you. I will go to prison.
Starting point is 00:54:50 I will. I'm not kidding. For dismemberment on live TV. Literally, I will cut your head off. I will, like, and I don't care, you know? I get so like, there's like those TikTok accounts that are like the people that like pose as like 13 year olds and they go and they find these people and they're all like, please, like, there's like those TikTok accounts that are like the, like the people that like pose as like 13 year olds and they go and they find these people
Starting point is 00:55:08 and they're all like, please don't ruin my life. And it's like, you deserve right now to just get the worst thing to happen. I know this girl's like four. Murder. And it's like, you're like ill. And like, there's like these random comments and shit and like, whatever.
Starting point is 00:55:23 Not like that. Like there was a comment from a guy, I don't know, I remember some guy wrote something and then someone said, why are you here? And then that was a guy who said that. And then that dude replied, same reason as you. And I'm like, ew, bro. All right.
Starting point is 00:55:38 Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. We can't end on this. We can't end on this. All right. Have a good week. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we can't end on this. I got a question for you. If you can have your dick and balls taste like one candy in the world, what would it be?
Starting point is 00:55:50 Skittles. Ooh, what color skittle? You can't have them taste like all the skittles. You know what? No, I would have them taste like a lemon ice. That probably tastes like sweat. It's like sweaty and gross. No, lemony.
Starting point is 00:56:08 It's like if- You want lemony fresh dick? Yeah, like a, it's refreshing. No, no, no, no. You know when you drink like a really cold glass of water and it's like infused maybe with some fruit. Okay, okay, okay. And it's like ooh, or like a seltzer that's like,
Starting point is 00:56:22 you know? Yeah. So like that. So that's why I'm saying like a lemon ice. It would be like refreshing. Saying watermelon, big league chew. Gum? Hell yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:31 You want your dick to taste like gum. That wouldn't be that bad of an idea. Okay. All right guys, so how did you dig that out of your, well you had to dig us out of the pedophilia hole. Yeah, well there it is. You brought the word back up. this show this episode got demonetized you feel ya that it there are people named Ophelia Ophelia what a what does
Starting point is 00:56:55 it mean just love Ophelia oh shit you know what is the word Ophelia what is the word also I don't really love when people know what their name means to be honest and I'm not really crazy on that. It's like, oh, my name's this. And it means like, King of Gods. And it's like, you work at a store. Oh, wow. Ophelia is a Greek girl's name meaning help. Ophelia!
Starting point is 00:57:22 Help? It says help help aid or advantage Interesting best known for the tragic heroine in William Shakespeare's Hamlet although Ophelia stories heartbreaking and poignant the name also represents beauty and selflessness I guess I like to think it means help. It's a good lumineer song, too. I'm sure there's a song of Noah Cahan fucking Luminers Coldplay, I like that just give in I just give in to a lot Where's that puka shell necklace that you took off before we show it means I'm gonna go live in the woods and wear wooden shoes Bonnie Vare I'm sure you listen to also not really yeah, I bet you do you sleepy bastard sleepy Yeah, I do like music though like that that makes me feel like like like in front of a fireplace
Starting point is 00:58:05 Oh, yeah, you know I like to listen to in front of a fireplace Bow Wow crowd Don't crackling fire Love that love it when it just when it just randomly just Like it fucking that was incredible that the second one sucked. The first one was amazing Don't try to recreate it. Go out on top.
Starting point is 00:58:28 I remember when I was on that trip in Washington, there was one fire that went through. The wood was so dry. Cracky. This thing wouldn't shut up. Oh. The wood was on fire. Oh, I love the talky fire.
Starting point is 00:58:40 Dude, I was like, this thing's popping. Oh, I love that. I have a video. I don't care to the level of watching a video. I apologize. I apologize. I apologize. I believe and trust your story.
Starting point is 00:58:51 I don't need validation, Joey. Okay? Just don't say it again. But a crackly fire. I do one that spits at you every now and then. I like that. Just like, you can see it. And you can see it like fucking fire off
Starting point is 00:59:04 like an old like fucking like a Lord of the Rings like. Like a flare. Flaming like boulder. Like someone stuck in the fire and trying to get out shooting a flare. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you ignore it and you let it burn. Well, what the fuck?
Starting point is 00:59:14 You know what I mean? No, that's what I mean. No, that was kind of dark. I know. But it's not real. But it's imagined to be real in your head. I don't know, but like. No, you know. I don't., but like. No, you know.
Starting point is 00:59:25 I don't. Oh, all right. And staring at fires. Dude, a level of like, you experience a level of clarity staring at fires that you just can't find anywhere else. Also, the heat from a fire is unlike any other heat. It's not hot, but it's,
Starting point is 00:59:41 it's hugging me. It is. Like, I could feel, like, if I'm looking at a fire like this, I could feel it like tickling my back. Like it's like a little like back tickle. Or it feels like someone's just like, yes, yes, yes. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:59:51 But like a heater is like, Heater's just like, yeah, it's like someone's blowing hot air. A fire is just like, and it comes around you. Yeah, and it comes around, it's like a big fat guy just like laying on you. Well, you had to give it a gender, Joe.
Starting point is 01:00:06 I don't want to be hugged by some just random big man. If he's fire, I'll take it. I've been hugged by like a fire before, so. All right. I like that feeling though. And bonfires being outside, it's like, oh, I'm cold, my feet are hot. Oh, I like that.
Starting point is 01:00:21 Yeah. When was the last time you roasted a marshmallow? A week ago? On a fire. Hell. Yeah, brother. Where backyard? Oh, you got a fire pit. Hell. Yeah, brother Fucking did I how many did you eat? for Minimum and they were the fucking her she's her she's her she's her she's oh's they were the big assholes the big like big fat big fat big dumps Yeah, big dump of a marshmallow. Oh, you got the okay. Oh, but you can't do the little ones People that do just the singular one. No, I want the big dump ones. I
Starting point is 01:00:56 Can't really eat that much marshmallow. Oh, I know of marshmallows. I'm like over it Especially a like I want one that's like like coming out like looking like fucking Burnt to it crisp. Yeah. Yeah, I want that too. I want it to be like melting all over my hands Yeah, it's burning my finger. I want to take the like light first layer of skin off and then there's just that ooey gooey Let me Gooey, do you put it on a stick or do you put it on a like a pike? I like putting it on a stick cuz it's like I'm eating that I'm earthing it yeah exactly like I feel like there's a level of dirty it is it is a little dirty but also like you know maybe
Starting point is 01:01:32 that's why I don't get colds as often as everyone else that I know probably not you know but yeah anyway thank you guys so much for sticking around for this episode of the basement yard Frank we're gonna find you if however is eight zero eight five on Twitter the Frank hours in all the forms of social media, then go check out the page, patreon.com slash The Basement Yard, The Basement Yard in all forms of social media, thebasementyard.com.
Starting point is 01:01:52 So much, so much goodies for you, bitch. You can follow me at Joe Santagato, go follow the show on TikTok at The Basement Yard, TikTok and Instagram. And that is as all see you guys next time Don't do that

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