The Basement Yard - #445 - Is Jenny from The Block?
Episode Date: April 8, 2024She used to have alittle and now she has alot! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome back to the base.
Welcome back to the basement yard.
Frank, how's it going, Chief?
Chief. I know, I know.
I don't think you could say that, Joey.
I know. I think is chief becoming like a word that we take that they take back?
Who? The First Nation, indigenous population, Native American.
I'm not even sure what used all of the of those terms. I just wanted a blanket.
Right.
Probably shouldn't use that term.
Blanket, well.
Yeah, well.
Yeah, no, blankets were not, yeah.
They're not big blanket fans anymore.
I am doing well.
As this is recording, it's opening day for baseball,
so daddy's at fucking half cock.
Yeah, whatever that begins to mean.
I don't know.
I'm at, half mast full mast
half half mast that's what someone dies my dick isn't dead what's full mass my
balls are dead your balls are super dead fucking gone yeah full full mass is like
when they fly the flag regular when someone dies they do half mass half
mast which is a...
You know, flag traditions. I don't know them. This is when we were built as a nation off of like, we give our messaging through flags.
And I think we've come back to that. We probably need to pull back a little bit.
Yeah.
Just saying. Just saying.
Listen, if you're watching this, the tour is out and about.
Okay, we have 14, 15 shows, something like that.
You know what's like that across the country
You know, it's crazy is that people in the episode that we recorded where we listed the shows and the dates and the theaters and
All that it was like further into the episode. Yeah people watch this episode first. They'll know sooner. Yeah
But if you go to the basement.com right now, you will see all the tour dates
Probably coming to a city near you
Definitely pop out get some tickets again. That is theard.com right now you will see all the tour dates probably coming to a city near you definitely pop out get some tickets again that is the Basemayard.com you need the code basement I think still presale code yeah
by the time this is available to the general public it'll be
general sale general sale if you're seeing this as a patron you will get the
presale code basement to use as you know to get some tickets to get in your fucking greasy little
Grimy grubs all over those little baby boy ticket. Okay, be nice. But yeah, go to the basemayor.com right now go to
Just go get some tickets. We want to see you guys out there. Just look around. That's what you guys do. I'm very excited
baseball basement boys
Yeah very excited. Baseball, basement boys. Yeah. The start, the unaffili-
This is the spring training of dog sucking season.
Okay.
Yeah.
Oh yeah, you said you're having a hot dog tonight?
I'm having a couple, Joey.
Yeah.
Let's put this, put it like this.
We got a Costco size order of hot dogs.
Did you?
We're having two extra people over.
And you, and you're going to make 30 hot dogs.
I'm going to make-
And then you're going to go, we can't throw these out. Well, no. And then you're going to eat 30 hot dogs. So hear you're gonna go, we can't throw these out.
And then you're gonna eat 30 hot dogs.
Hear me out, hear me out, hear me out.
So Costco by us sells the specialty dogs that we like.
Okay. What is that?
They're like deli dogs.
They're not just like regular,
like there's no issue here with, you know,
Nathan's or Sabret or you know, whoever, or Ballpark Franks.
But there's like a specialty dog by us that we found
Why is it specialty?
Because they're fat as shit and they fucking rip
Oh they look like my dad's hands?
Yeah you know what honestly yeah
Yeah
But they like when you cook them they get fucking hot and juicy so they rip
Like a veiny fucking bichet. You know what I'm saying now. You've lost me, but yeah
I know I was there for a little bit. I just like when they slap you oh yeah
No, when you find a good slappy hot dog
So we got it we got enough and then whatever we don't use will freeze keep them for the season
But now opening day of baseball is spring training for dog-sucking season
Mm-hmm and as you know spring training lasts a little while,
as we get closer to Memorial Day weekend,
that's when we're going full fucking swing.
Full throttle.
Full throttle into the dogs.
Yeah.
And cholesterol.
Right.
But you know, what are you gonna do?
What are you gonna do?
Just, you gotta live your life also, you know?
So also got some kraut.
Good old classic German kraut is coming through. Okay, and uh
Beans, you know, it's just gotta start Frank's fucking excited. Are you more excited for the hot dogs for the baseball? Yes
Got it. Yeah. Also, I just want to say we're
Almost five minutes into this episode and you haven't even brought up my sweater, dude. Well, I didn't want to it's cool
That's the word we're to. It's cool.
That's the word we're going with?
It's warm.
You look like, just like a-
Don't.
What?
I was gonna say, you look like a rejected fruit roll-up.
First of all, I look like the good fruit roll-up.
The tie-dye one?
Yeah.
The one that has tattoos and you just be like,
no, that was the, that was the, oh yeah, fruit roll-up.
I was thinking fruit by the foot.
But yeah, the fruit roll-up that like you fucking stretch out
like it's a dental dam.
And you put it on your tongue.
A dental dam.
And then you have a tattoo of like a fucking,
what, like a snail or something.
Maybe you know this.
I probably do.
Probably not, but dental dams.
It's not actually like a female condom for like sex, right?
It's just for like licking vagina. I so I recently heard this I was talking with some friends about this
we have incredible dinner conversations my friends and I and
Apparently it started as like a dent like for dental for tooth work. I've had but it became like a
is like a dent like for dental for tooth work. I've had one.
But it became like a.
Pussy.
Yeah, it became vagina stuff.
It became a pussy tarp.
Yeah, I've often told the story.
I used it as a drain blocker.
Oh yeah, I remember that.
In my back tub.
Yeah, yeah.
Because I didn't know what it was
and I just saw a sheet of rubber
and I was just like, oh, they sell, it was like wrapped.
I used to try to wrap my mind around like,
do you put it in?
No, you like fucking like yeah, you like stretch it over like a tarp and then you just like
Yeah, I guess you do that
But there's other ones that I which like that doesn't to me
I understand for the safe sex of everything which
Practice safe practice it but like that sounds so whack dude
If I was gonna talk down if I was getting my shit eight and someone fucking rolled out a carpet for me
Yeah, I'd be pissed dude. Yeah, I don't want that
They're pulling rubber out of a bag like they're a fucking plumber. Yeah, I don't want this shit. Yeah, that'd be very strong
I mean well now you're saying practice safe sex and then you're I don't completely shitting on contraceptives
So if someone pulled out a rubber, I'd be like what the fuck I'm just I think if you were a girl
You'd be like, you know, just dog my shit raw
You were about to say hell yeah, sorry
What I was gonna say, how is this question being asked? Do you think so you think you'd be like, yo
Just fucking throw that shit. No, no, no, I don't I don't question being asked? Do you think so? You think you'd be like, yo, just fucking throw that shit
and let's go crazy?
No, no, no, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't think so.
You don't think you would like the dog?
I'd be afraid.
Dicks are fucking weapons of mass destruction.
You think I want that shit anywhere
around my fucking boy pussy?
Are you afraid?
No, in this situation, you have a real vagina.
Oh, like, so like alternate reality
where I have a legit vagina.
You have a birgana, yeah.
And then it's like, you just fucking bang my shit to hell.
Or.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Or like, and also like, are you more afraid of like,
stids or are you more afraid of pregnancy babies?
Oh, I mean, both are non-ideal.
I think that, you know, they can both
in their individual ways change your lives forever
Yeah, um, I was so afraid of STD not that I'm not now but like I would say oh man
I was so afraid of STDs when I was younger, dude
I don't know. That's a really really tough question because men just suck
You know and like they're just like real like assholes and pieces of shit and they're walking around with just like a fucking
Not literally but just like a figurative nuclear weapon in their pants. What do you do? Why why are you saying that?
Because like I'd be more afraid to be a woman accepting a wiener. Oh
Yeah, dicks are insane. What I honestly think that like
Revealing a dick is the worst part of sex. I would be so
Like if you're a woman and it's like I got I don't even know what this thing is. Bro, dicks are just dog shit.
Huh? Dicks are dog shit. But like that part as a woman is probably the most rough part. Seeing it? Just like I'm about to embark on a journey and I don't even know what's happening. Yeah. I don't know what the car looks like.
I don't know. Exactly.
Yo, exactly. And they're so different.
You're asking me to buy a vehicle without getting an idea what the interior looks like?
No car facts. And also like vaginas of like, yeah, of course they can like look a little
different sometimes. But at the end of the day, it's a vagina.
It does the job, you know? It's here. It is an absolutely like it does its thing. It works. And it's it's it's it's here. It is that an absolutely like it does its thing it works, and it's internal
Yeah, yeah, like who the hell this thing is like outside. It's summer long summer short
I'm like the porn industry the porn industry is shamed vagina
Someone like this and so like honestly that that sweater is giving like vagina energy
Like you got like vagina energy.
Like you got, like you have a lippy sweater.
Have you seen a vagina sweater? Like I don't know.
I have, yeah.
This looks like a vagina?
I'm just saying, like it could give vagina energy, you know?
And I'm not saying like a feminine energy,
I'm just saying like there's something vagina-like
about that sweater and I can't put my finger on it
and that's not a bad thing.
Okay, well I think you're the only person on earth that will think that um but yeah I don't know I
just I was just asking a question. I hate how you're saying bang my shit to hell. What? It's such a wild
that's such a wild thing to say. Has anyone ever told you don't put the condom on?
To say. Has anyone ever told you, don't put the condom on?
Uh, yeah. No one's ever said that to me. Yeah, they have. I don't know if I should be offended by that.
Yeah, they said- No one's like, keep it on.
Ew, ew, ew, keep it on.
I also would just be like, fucking absolutely not.
I'm a scared little boy. I mean, I'm terrified.
I'm a terrified little baby boy. I'm a terrified little girl.
In that moment, I'm just a little like, I mean, I'm terrified. I'm terrified little baby. I'm a terrified little girl in that moment
I'm just a little like, you know, please please don't if you're gonna condom sex. I'm still like
Oh
Yeah, you have to take on yeah. Yeah. I mean you drive slow through a work zone. You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, dude, so and when that bus stop stop sign comes out you come to a halt. Well, that's a law
Yeah, that's a law right that you're supposed I know. Your extra precautions is what you're saying. Taking
the appropriate precaution is not extra. I stop a block back. Oh. Yeah no I can't do
any of that. That's terrifying. I think about shit too much. I'm up all night. I'm like
no I know this is happening to me now. Yeah yeah yeah you start planning for a lot. You
start like naming children and stuff like that. You that. I don't know if you do this too, but whenever I hear about someone
like being, even being sick, like someone's like, oh, they threw up. I then like immediately
get sick. No, no, no. I think that I'm going to get whatever they have. I mean, have you
seen the, is it like an irrational?
No, completely irrational.
Oh.
Like I just hear about someone's like,
oh they have like-
You're a bit of a hypochondriac.
We've noticed this throughout several stories
that you've told where like you just woke up one day
and you were like, I said, I got HIV.
I don't know, but I just-
It's all right, I freaked out a little bit
on the plane back from South by Southwest.
I freaked out a little, a tiny tad back from South by Southwest. I freaked out a little a tiny tad
Why because I had like gotten like I?
Scratched my finger on like you know like that like threaded cable and like it could fray sometimes
And it's like the like frayed like metal cables
Yeah, it was holding the toilet paper in the toilet paper roll in the bathroom of the airplane and it like scratched my finger
I was like oh, oh
in the bathroom of the airplane and it like scratched my finger I was like oh oh my god and then the rest of the flight I was like can I can I get some
just Purell wipes or something I was fucking scrubbing the finger like my
basically my fingerprint off of my finger I'm obviously completely fine right I
was I was a little freaked out yeah yeah if I got bit by a dog dude forget about
it well you just as a precaution you should just go anyways
What happens if I get rabies you die?
Really if you don't get it
So you when you get raped when you get attacked or scratched bitten by an animal you have to get there's a shot that you
Have to get if you do not get that shot and you experience symptoms of rabies. They are fatal
Oh, they are fatal. Oh.
They are like 100 percent, if not like 99.8 or some percent fatal.
I've never been bitten.
I've never been rabied.
I've never been rabied either, but I've come close.
I used to be afraid of rabies too.
First of all, I used to think they were afraid of because they're animals.
I thought that all animals had rabies.
No, no.
I thought it was just like rabies was for animals.
So like when animals bit me when I was younger,
which that didn't happen all the time.
I don't know why I'm saying that.
But like anytime I was like interacting with an animal,
like I thought like worms had rabies and shit.
I don't think worms can carry rabies, you idiot.
I don't think they could bite you either.
I don't, there are worms that can bite you.
You ever seen a blood worm?
Where am I gonna see a blood worm, dude?
I'm talking about fucking ones that exist
in my mom's dirt.
Blood worms exist in the world, Joey. You ever seen them? Look see a bloodworm, dude? I'm talking about fucking ones that exist in my mom's dirt. Bloodworms exist in the world, Joey. Have you ever seen them?
Look up a bloodworm.
Look it up. Just look it up. Just look it up.
Is it bloody?
It's gonna fuck you up. I'll tell you this. It's got- it's got copper teeth.
Look it up. This thing's got-
Colored or like, it's made of pennies?
It's made of pennies. This thing's got grills like Nellie.
Blood-
What the fuck is that? I told you brother.
Ew. Yeah, it was just like halt. EW! Yep, told ya. This looks like the tip of a penis with teeth.
What? Oh, I feel like I've looked at this before. What do you have?
What do you have on the tip of your dick? Bro, this doesn't look like the tip of a penis. Oh, hold on.
Come on. Honestly, he's kind of right. Yeah, that's a little cock. That's a little cock.
But this one has like teeth on it, which is kind of insane. Yo, worms? Wild. I'm gonna say no.
Yeah, take the worms. Take the worms. I'd like to sign a petition to get rid of worms. Yeah, that would be nice.
Well, we were so
growing up at the lake house, we were always, it was like fucking emphasized. Like if you see a raccoon or a skunk during the day,
you stay as far away as you can
because those are traditionally nocturnal animals.
And if you see them out during the day, they're rabid
because like they're like fucking idiots when they're rabid.
They're like, I don't know, day is night, night is day,
eat is drink and fucking whatever.
Really? Yeah.
And then-
Did you confirm that as an adult or is that just like a?
Why pretty no no I'm pretty sure that's like a known thing it's like they're all fucked up, but then apparently
Do you remember the episode of the office where?
What's her name Meredith got hit by Michael's car?
Yeah, they find out that she also got bit by a bat so like she had like a possibly had rabies
Yeah, and it's like they're afraid of water that's
true i've seen like clips of people that have like begun to succumb to the you know fucking
symptoms of rabies and like they can't drink water their body literally is like
and like their throat closes and shit yeah they're afraid of water apparently
it's wild welcome back to the rabies yard.
I had no idea of any of that.
Bro, rabies.
I thought it was just like you foam with the mouth thing.
They foam with the mouth.
They're fucking like, it's like mad cow disease.
They're all nuts.
Remember when mad cow disease was a big thing?
Yeah, dude, I fucking gave up burgers for like a whole summer.
Dude, 2006 was a wild time.
That was 06?
It was around then.
It was around then.
Around then.
Remember West Nile?
They would fly the fucking planes over
and drop all the fucking-
Bro, I remember as a kid-
Stay inside!
Yeah, they were like, stay inside
and we'd be watching the fucking chem trails
and we'd be like, oh shit.
Yeah, they're like, we're going to drop
a bunch of chemicals on top of you guys.
You know, I knew a girl that had contracted
cerebral malaria from a mosquito bite.
She had done missions during the summer like Uganda and some other African countries. She wasn't taking the pills
I don't I don't know what she was medication. She was taking but it was a girl that I had worked with it at college and
We had gotten a call to her room
myself and other staff members and they were like
She's having a seizure. Holy shit and we're like what and we go in there and she's seizing on her bed
Terrifying bro. It was nuts
I I felt so fucking bad for this poor girl and like the like ours are like
Other staff member who is a female had to like layer on her side and like get her like dressed and shit like that
And she had to go to the hospital. She had cerebral malaria. That's fucking wild.
Is she okay?
I don't know where she is today.
I have not gotten confirmation that she's not okay.
So I hope she is.
But yeah, wild.
Yeah, malaria is a crazy one.
Cerebral, that's brain brother.
Yeah. That's crazy.
Yeah, that is terrifying.
Don't have a seizure in front of me, please.
I've had, I've also had someone else at't have a seizure in front of me, please I've had I've also had someone else at Target have a seizure in front of me bro. I had a dream that you and I robbed a target
That's fire. Do we have guns? We didn't have guns. What do we have any weapons?
We just went in and we're just like oh we were just like shop with us and then afterward you were mad at me
Because I got us into legal trouble like we got caught and you were mad at me for it
And who's who caught us Edie Falco?
Was she like working there or she was he was working there and she was Edie Falco things apparently we're not going well for miss Falco
Jesus which couldn't be farther from the truth. She has a very she's like Joey. Yeah, she basically she caught she's like I gotcha and
You got mad at me cuz you like I just spoke to my lawyer
And he says we're probably gonna do time and I was just like dude. This is a dream and you're like no
It's not and then I woke up. Oh
So you were trying to like I was trying to convince you this is just a playful dream
So you were trying to gaslight me even though it was a dream you were trying to get no no gas lighting is not
The answer I was trying to bring you I was trying to show you the way no no you weren't aware that it was a dream you were trying to get no no no gaslighting is not the answer I was trying to bring you I was trying to show you the way no no you weren't aware that it was a dream
I was that's why I said it's a dream. I
Was like dude. It's just a dream. Let's have fun. Let's rob some targets and shit
Yeah, we didn't have weapons though shoplifting isn't robbing
I mean, I know that it is but like it is by definition what I know that but like shoplifting is just like well
I'm gonna take a t-shirt, but like robbing is like give me all your god damn someone that worked in that industry
Shoplifting is more than just hey, I'm gonna take a t-shirt. It's hey
I'm gonna bring fucking like storage bins in a cart and just wipe entire aisles down and run out the back door
How much money could you possibly make from that targets cheap?
No, it's not even it depends on what you're taking
So a big thing that was stolen from targets when I was there and I'm sure it's still a thing now was fucking baby
Formula because that shit is oh, yeah
Yeah, not cheap cornering the market of baby farm and then that's a good Rob there all be honest
It's like a $50 for like a fucking two-week tub, and then you have to they sell it to like
Bodegas
or delis or just like secondhand people.
So it's all profit.
Even if they sell it for 35 bucks, you know,
that's $35 that they got for zero.
Yeah.
Wild times.
Wild times.
We should start robbing.
No.
You ever go through a phase where you're like,
I'm gonna start selling drugs.
With that sweatshirt, I believe you're in it,
but I have not.
You never thought for a second,
like maybe we should move a brick for just one.
No.
You've never thought that?
Literally no.
I remember sitting in a Dunkin' Donuts and thinking that.
Where has your life gone?
Like what has happened to you during your 32 years of
existence?
I'm pretty sure I was 16 years old and I was like,
maybe if we just-
Joey, shut the fuck up. You were the biggest prude at 16.
Bro first of all, no one is sitting here acting like they're actually doing this.
Girls would call you up and say come over I want you to fucking rub your tiny little cock in my hand
and you'd be petrified and you're trying to convince me now that you were gonna sell drugs?
Get the fuck outta here!
No you weren't!
It's been...
Like...
I didn't say I was gonna do it!
I'm saying I thought about it!
Hey, I guess what? I thought about being a billionaire, but it ain't gonna fucking happen.
Oh my god girl would fucking I get I can drop fucking names first and last
right now I don't even know you're talking about there was a girl we talked
about it that invited give me a give me the letters and Jordans yeah first of
all I went she wasn't home! Regardless, you said you were scared though!
I was very scared to lose my virginity!
Joey, and I know Joey walking in, he's like, oh my god.
Bro, I walked to her house, and when she didn't pick up, I was like, thank god.
I was gonna lose my virginity. But you didn't.
I wonder how she's doing, you know?
Yeah, I don't know. I don't keep tabs on people like that.
I haven't seen her face in 20 years, so.
So, who knows? Maybe she's still waiting for you.
Maybe she's just waiting for the call.
That is so funny.
And she's just like, yo, diddy bop your way over here.
No, don't.
She kinda did.
No, she didn't.
She kinda did.
She was a nice lady.
She was a nice lady.
Just, well, you think people that speak like that
are not nice?
Oh, here he is, ladies and gentlemen.
We got him.
No, I'm just saying she was a nice lady
Lady, yeah, she was how old do you have to be to be a lady? I?
Was gonna say honestly it's got 45. I'm yeah 45 to be a lady before that. It's a girl
Woman
Yes, woman before that no women. I think is a blanket like you're a woman when you're like
28 oh Yes, woman before that. No, women I think is a blanket. Like you're a woman when you're like...
28. Oh, okay.
27, no.
Okay, I'll say 27 to whenever.
Those are women.
27 to 45. After that it's a lady.
But they're...
Yeah.
Okay.
You could be a woman at 40, but you're not like a lady.
Yeah.
You know what I'm saying?
I hear you, 100%.
And also, you're like 22, like this isn't a lady and a man past 45 to
55 55 ma'am
Ma'am ma'am is 50. This doesn't apply to the south because you guys are ma'am and sir
Yeah, you're all deep dealing in big bang. I mean, but yeah like a late like a lady
I think though like oh, that's a that's a this lady. This lady over here.
You wouldn't say that about like a 25 year old. Look at this lady over here. I'm with you.
I think we can. But like young lady that's different. Young woman young lady. We're talking about just ladies. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
You know what I'm saying? Yes, I agree.
Thought about that the other day. Anyway, we do have some sponsors for today. The first one being Rocket Money.
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We love you and back to you Joe
That's a long-winded thing. I'll never talk about my wind. Okay
Don't you ever talk about my wind ever
Cheers
No, I'm trying to get you to drink that. Oh cuz I spit and it's spitting it
Yeah, I'm aware of it. You would kind of get turned on by that you freak what you spit and you fucking drink it back up now
Oh, yeah, no, you ever had someone be like fucking drink my spit. No, no, no, all right. No, I would not do that
But yeah, I wanted to talk about what you're a dirty little bitch what what
I'm curious now like where where does it start and stop with you?
Are you like,
are you like I'm gonna fucking like spit on my own chest
and make you lick it off me?
I'm gonna fucking piss into a toilet, you watch me?
I don't know.
What was that?
I don't know, I don't know.
The first one didn't sound as bad as the second one.
I'm gonna piss in a toilet and have you watch me?
I don't know dude. You're a weirdo sometimes. Sometimes. You're apparently trying to sell
drugs at 16. No one was trying to sell drugs. I said that I like thought about oh what if I just
I don't think the statute of limitations up on that so you were 16 years ago. I've never even
ironically statute of limitation on thinking conspiring to sell drugs. 17 years.
Ladies and gentlemen, get him.
That's not conspiring. It's a thought that went into my stupid head.
FBI, Homeland Security, DEA, ATF, they've all been a little busy lately.
I've never seen a brick of cocaine in my life.
Have you ever seen cocaine?
Of course.
In real life, I have too.
Yeah.
Yeah, I don't think that's... I think everyone has seen cocaine.
It was weird. Seeing it? Yeah. I felt like I was like, oh! Really? Yeah, it freaked me
out. I mean, I've seen some shit. I was in, oh. Yeah. Do you remember the guy who did
horse tranquilizer in front of us? Okay, that's fine. I'm not gonna bring that up. Oh, why?
Well. Well, I know why you don't want to talk about it. Yeah, exactly. You know, but it
was crazy. It was, I was very scared.
When did you see cocaine in real life?
Fucking, I don't know.
Dude, it's not that crazy to see cocaine.
I think it's crazy.
I'm such a little baby boy with that stuff.
People just do cocaine in clubs.
But I haven't spotted them and go, whoa!
You know, like you see someone in a club, you're like, oh shit.
No, I was at a bar in Astoria. of us were there and I was there you were there
but I went into the basement into the bathroom mm-hmm, and there was someone in there and
They had their key out yeah, and they had cocaine on it, and they were like you're cool, right?
I was like yeah, and I'm bump. I was like no and I walk so when I oh when I was in a in
Greece there was some some dude got engaged
Like while we were at this place
Yeah, and they were having like a party with like their whole family and stuff and then I went to the bathroom eventually
And when I get there, it's not inside yet because when you walk up to the bathroom, it's like at like outside
Yeah, I know you're talking and there's like a shared sink and he's just banging rails on that Jesus in front of the ocean
What's the craziest drug you've seen in real life?
I guess the like would the horse tranquilizer be the that was something
Um, I saw someone I don't know what was in the syringe, but they were shooting up something. I was at a in high school
I was at a billiard hall in like I guess
What would that be considered like Ravenswood Sunnyside area and you remember you remember off Queens Boulevard?
Ravenswood and Sunnyside are in completely different places. No, I mean that that general area on that other side of Queens Boulevard
Yeah, you know like where Queens Boulevard where there was that it was the Chuck E Cheese the guitar center the Toys R Us and the BJs
Behind there there was those train tracks. Yeah, there was like a billiard spot. Who's calling me my dad
Did you crack your screen my dude you just cracked your screen, it's okay
Dude, you should it did it
cracked your screen. It's okay. Dude, you did it? I don't know. I hit the corner. There's rug everywhere. This kid hit the corner of the chair. Cracked a screen. Anyway, Frank
was gonna... You cracked it. Yeah. You cracked it. Oh, oh no. I thought that was gonna be
the crack. You got a screen protector on there? Yeah, of course I do.
This guy, what are you, jerk off with a condom on too, loser?
Ha ha ha ha!
This guy's got a screen protector!
I got it, I got it, I got it.
So as I was saying, Actus Billiard Hall,
and I went into the bathroom
and I hear someone shuffling around in the fucking stall.
And they- So you took a look?
No, so I'm peeing and I hear him shuffling around.
The door opens and they walk out with a syringe
and I look in the fucking stall
and there's blood everywhere, dude.
Everywhere.
He bled all over the place?
Everywhere and I walked out of the bathroom
with the people I was with, I was like, we gotta go.
This ain't it.
That's crazy.
This ain't it, but they were serving beer underage.
So I was.
So we stayed.
I was so pumped to stay.
Yeah.
But drugs in real life scare me.
Yeah, I mean,
I don't like to be around drugs either.
And it's weird, right?
Yeah.
It's just creepy.
It's not like I'm hanging out with heroin addicts.
I know, I know you're not.
I know, but like, it's just a weird thing, but...
Yeah.
I've never seen, you know what I've never seen?
I've seen cocaine a lot.
Okay, chill out.
No, but I'm saying.
Weird flex.
No, no, no, not flexing.
I've seen it.
I'm saying I've seen that a lot.
So like that's not that crazy to me,
but like someone who's like heating up a spoon or something,
I'd be like, bro, what's going on?
I was, so when I was in college,
my college, University of New Haven was in West Haven,
which is not a traditionally
great neighborhood. And I went to a party at a girl's apartment with a bunch of people
and it smelled so weird outside. And I was like, what the hell is that smell? And I looked
over and I saw someone with like, you could see the light from a lighter. And I was like, what the hell is that?
And we got upstairs and she's like,
oh, they're smoking crack.
That's what that smell is.
They heating up that silverware.
And I'm like, that's what crack smells like?
How do people smoke it?
It smells like fucking dog shit.
Nice.
I guess they don't care about the smell.
They care about the, the inhalant.
Yeah. Yeah.
So.
I feel like we probably have stuff that smells like shit.
Right? What? We probably eat stuff that smells like shit, right? What we probably eat stuff that smells like shit like I mean, but like this was like not this was like a weird gross
Chemically smell it wasn't like a good like musky smell
Musky is not really a musky like like an aged meat or like a fuck is like a hard cheese
Yeah, some cheeses though are like... Don't. Gross though. I watched
pretty much an hour yesterday of a guy cutting a big old wheel. A wheel of cheese.
Oh my god. It's a lot of work to cut a fucking cheese. It is, but like once they break that they hammer it
down like it's a fucking railroad track. There's like three spikes in it. Yeah. Oh dude I
saw the one the one that I saw recently was you know who I'm a little obsessed with full
I'm gonna full-on fucking fanboy out here free plug you ever watch nona Pia
No, no, you don't know no na Pia probably do she's the little old Italian grandma
Who just makes food and just gets like fucking cheese delivered to her and he's just like no na Pia what we make an age
She's like, oh would make a money go
And he's like we're making a money. Go. Okay, no nappier. Let's see. He go you wash your hands good
No, they're clean
They clean bro
I will fucking die for this grandma mainly because I don't have one myself anymore, right and I need one
Right, you know trying to make up for all those years that you I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah, so no nappier
You don't know go check it out.
There's one episode where she goes
to visit her husband's grave.
Huh.
Not sure what you did?
I might die.
I might have done like the fucking like kill bill
like death punch.
If I take five steps I'll drop dead.
It's all right.
Uh, you're nervous?
A little bit.
Ha ha ha ha.
Old people just make me sad dude, you know you ever think about this I
Forgot maybe I heard this some never think about this
Me first, okay, because that's how yeah, uh
You know how you go to a cemetery right and you're like're like, a lot of fucking tombstones, obviously, right?
What happens?
But wait, but wait.
There's way more people who die in the world
than there are tombstones.
What happens to the rest of them?
They're not all cremated.
Some can be cremated.
Some could be.
But like, where do they bury them?
I don't know.
Like, you know what I'm saying?
Unmarked graves.
But bro, tell me how
Since we were young like the first time I went to a funeral. I was young like you know like
20 years ago, maybe I don't know something like that and you you went there in 20 years and
then the most recent one I've been to
Just happened not too long ago ago and that's at the same
cemetery so in 20 years how many people died in this neighborhood that were
buried there how we still buried but then there are people that are like they
built like mausoleums and shit like that not that many but then there are people
that get like flown to like their home countries I think you're underestimating
the population of a New York City fucking listen to me listen to me
I don't think you're like realizing how many people get cremated
Cremation has become like a big thing when I was a kid
No one talked about getting cremated mainly because not many people were talking about death
We were in third grade
Yeah
But like I feel like it has become like a newer thing that like people like people are like doing like cremation
They're like, you know, throw my ashes on fucking Yankee Stadium throw my ashes in the fucking you know in a lake shit like that
There's only
1900 cemeteries in New York. That's a I don't think you're realizing how many that is Joey
and also also also
my turn now also
How long does it take these bodies to fully decompose in their wood boxes?
But the tell tombstone stay but the tombstones might be you know they might get moved and sometimes they fall and no
Elsewhere you never know no what do you mean you can go back and fucking visit?
Yeah, no no Pia's husband so like if you put a tombstone, expensive, you better not fucking do this thing.
Oh yeah, those are, not like the old ones, like we're talking like the ones that are like made out of like fucking like big old marbles.
Yeah, and it's not like you can bury someone on top, I mean you could maybe if they're relatives,
but you're not gonna bury like Johnny down the block on top of my grandma because her tombstone is there.
Maybe your grandma wants some fucking
good old Hia Duskies.
I get that, but when you look at the tombstones,
they say your person's name on it, boom, right here.
I don't know, honestly, I honestly don't know.
Where are the fucking bodies, bro?
I mean, maybe some of them are being dumped out to sea,
maybe some of them are being, listen.
Dumped out to sea?
Shot in a space.
No one's doing that
How why not?
a lot of money to shoot things into space
If I'm dead who gives a fuck?
Dickhead I'm talking about for the world. I was sending a rocket to space
Who do you think that's? Freak?
Just do like once every five years hear me out once every five years
You send a rocket to space carrying only dead people and you you just like have it be like big is this rocket you have it be a special rocket
That like once I get sassier rockin fucking blows up
And then all the dead people in it just become one with the fucking eternal darkness of space
It's kind of fire kind of sick right I know but you can't do that
What a big rocket five years of dead people?
Yeah.
That's bodies, baby.
Yeah, freeze them.
What is that gonna do, make them heavier?
No, that's a good question.
Yeah?
I don't know.
Huh.
Yeah.
Do things get heavier?
No.
I think they do.
Do they?
I think they get more dense.
If you take a cup of water and you weigh it and then you freeze it, is it heavier?
Joey, is it very basic fucking like state of matter is gonna help give us this answer?
I feel like it's the same, right? But it can't be. What's heavier? I think it's the same
because of density, dude. Now you're just throwing out terms I think I don't know we should call our boys
Whom Hank Green? Oh, yeah, maybe ask him. Yeah, like a cup of water and then you freeze it. It's a block of ice
That's heavy. I could pick it up and be like, oh, I feel this thing. I think it might be the same weight
But it's just like the density changes because when things are solid, you know, we know how atoms work
You know, they're more tightly packed. We yes. I
Don't know I think so like it might weigh the same but like it has different properties and densities
What what an unbelievably stupid group of people
What an unbelievably stupid group of people you have sitting in front of you. And I apologize too, I apologize for being this dumb.
But dude, I'm honestly concerned where all these fucking dead bodies are.
Also, there's no cemeteries in Manhattan.
You know that, right?
So all of Manhattan has to be buried in the other boroughs.
No, there's cemeteries in Manhattan.
No, there isn't.
None?
Look it up right now.
I don't believe what you're saying
Where are they where do they bury your boy? Who's my boy Epstein?
Hopefully in the fucking with the fucking I was gonna say in the ground what that's where most people can
There is some got them yeah there is some actually but they're
small they're like the tiny ones oh like the ones that are in like like like on
the corner of the one on like 21st Street like right after a story apart
though it's like right next to just like an Irish Catholic Church yeah like
shit like a soccer field I don't know that there's like actual fucking like
big ones yeah I know actual fucking like big ones
Yeah, I know you're like the ones that are like, but even then there's only there's one two, three four
There's nine in Manhattan and like most of them are just kind of like that Queens has a shit ton
Yeah, and these are all massive broke the brother one that like spans from Queens and Brooklyn
There's barely any in the Bronx and these are probably just like small
I asked you a question who the hell wants to get buried in the Bronx Brooklyn. Wait's barely any in the Bronx and these are probably just like small ones too. Let me ask you a question,
who the hell wants to get buried in the Bronx?
Brooklyn, wait, what is that?
Oh, these are the ones that do Brooklyn and Queens.
So like the bulk of them are in Queens.
Bro, where are the bodies?
Where are the fucking bodies?
Where are they?
This is a really good question, honestly.
You know what I mean?
That's so many people, like think about that.
Like St. Mike's Cemetery has existed for how long?
How's it not full?
There's also like unmarked graves and like locations like you remember
i think it was during covid they were like bringing them to like
like where like the trump links like places across the white stone bridge
yeah and they were like burying people in unmarked graves and shit there so
like maybe they're just like running out of spots and they're like just like
and maybe maybe if it is like a spot where it's like you know a jane or john
doe or something,
they cremate them in order to save space. I don't know. I'm really not sure.
Maybe they're just trying to price people out and it's like,
that's why shit is so expensive because it's like,
just let us cremate this thing. I told you what I might possibly want.
I want to be put in like a tree pod. You ever see a tree and I become a fucking
tree. How awesome is that dude? Yeah, it's kind of cool
But then like what if dogs piss on me? I'll be a little upset about that. Yeah, I know you're into that. No
Fuck back to the pissing. No, I don't know why you keep saying that
Speaking of like, you know the Bronx or whatever
Gotta talk about Jenny from the block. Yeah, what the hell is? what's going on Jennifer Lopez? I mean I like Jennifer Lopez I think that she's a hot mama
you know?
I mean maybe you should like her past her fucking looks you shallow pedantic piece of shit
don't know her dude all I have is what she looks like
well apparently the fucking jig is up
people are starting to finally see through this Jenny from the block persona
yeah
is this is this the basement yard is fucking reporting on this first?
Is this all just an act? We're not reporting on it first. We're not yeah, absolutely not. We're about 418th
So but like so there's that video that came out that was like I hate those videos by the way
I got like GQ or whatever's like we're gonna ask you 99 questions
and they asked him to the weirdest questions and clearly.
And they follow them from like the base of their building
to like their fucking apartment to make a smoothie.
And they're like, I think at one point she said something,
she's like, you want tea?
And people are just like, come on.
Come on, bro.
This is all fucking like scripted.
So the two lines from this Jennifer Lopez thing are,
one where people are like, the guys,
the interviewer was like, everyone knows like,
hey, I'm walking here, which
Is from a movie?
Doesn't get said in real life. Yeah, it doesn't
but then these like what other like
What is your like go to New York saying like what also like real New Yorkers say yeah, and she's just like
Fuck you
And it's like oh my god Jennifer come on from the block it's
really corny when people like just perpetuate that like New Yorkers are so
like mean and whatever but it's like it's not like that it's not it's just
like it's just like don't fucking talk to me type of thing and like you're not
gonna because everyone is here's the best way people say like oh they're
fucking mean no we're just not we're just not saying hi to each other
And we're in a rush like we need to get where we're trying to go
So please let us get there and go there
Yeah, and if someone was like good morning, and it's someone I don't know just on the street
I'd be like what was that? Yeah, just like yeah, you know, it's like that's that's what that's what New York
Good mornings are like, you know
But like you don't talk to strangers at all
I get to the elevator of my building and I do not say a fucking word
My least favorite thing is because when I drive here sometimes I take Canal Street and you know
They have all those shops down Canal Street and every single one of those shops outside has a shirt that says like oh
It's New York. Fuck you you fuckity fuck. Yeah, and it's just like no
Forget about it. Yeah, forget about no one like that was a perpetuated in like the 80s and shit like that
But yeah now you're more likely to hear like a fucking like mmm way to go
You know like fucking super progressive of y'all in a New York than you are to hear a fucking forget about it
Yeah, you know, but meatballs
Forget about it. Well, that's the thing is that driving into Brooklyn they have a sign. It's like you're entering Brooklyn. Oh
Yeah, and it's like you're leaving. Oh, hey, it's like come on, dude
I also those shops one time I was driving by like near Chinatown and there was a
There was a t-shirt
Hanging right when you walk into the door of this shop and it had a rooster on it and in the Coca-Cola thing
Font it just said cock. It said enjoy my cock. That's what it said. Enjoy my cock. I was like
They have a ton of those and then they'll have like a bedazzled fucking like Justin Bieber shirt like just like what is who's buying this?
very very all over the place.
But it's just like, she's, it's almost become like her,
like Jenny from the block persona is just kind of that,
like a persona.
Apparently she went to like a high end Catholic school
and like grew up in like a fucking like well off home.
Yeah, she, she in the video, like that, like,
there's that video, which by the way,
you're seeing Kendall Jenner's,
they go, who's your spirit animal?
No, what's your spirit animal?
She goes, Tupac Shakur.
Unbelievable.
What are you even saying?
The one that's- Kendall Jenner?
The one that's also funny, I've seen this TikTok.
There's this TikTok account that I found
that's just like, what pop culture moments
will you not forget?
Yeah.
And there's one where it's like,
what can you not live without Selena Gomez?
And she's like, my family. And it's's like what can you not live without selena gobez and she's like my family and it's like what can you not live without uh kim kardashian
and she's like my cake contour brush but but that's like such a jarring like fucking like
difference but to poc shakur is a wild answer for like that's like me saying like fucking i don't
even like a girl like like an armenian american who grew up in up in Beverly Hills to be like my spirit animal to pock Shakur
Like is it is it Kendall Jenner?
but the other one you're referencing is when they were like
She was like working out her and JLo's hair is all fucked up. She's sitting there like this and she's like
Yeah, I like leaving my hair like this reminds me when I was like running up and down the block in the Bronx
It's like what the fuck are you talking about?
It's such a maybe some people from other bigger cities will relate to this
But like it was like people chose it as like a flex when they came from like a bad part of the city
Well, yeah, like yeah, I made it out like there are shootings in my city. Yeah, she's in my town
Someone got robbed down the block. Yeah people like love
fucking like
Just hyping up the fact that they like
live in a dangerous neighborhood. Also just like a lot of those people don't like, you
know, like you live outside of that, bro. You're not like, well, it's because like hip
hop and rap culture has kind of like the standouts from these areas come from like typically
low socioeconomic fucking areas that have higher crime rates.
So when people hear, I swear to God,
I remember when I was in college,
I was like, oh, I'm from New York City.
They're like, oh shit, Biggie?
And I was like, no, I'm from Queens.
And they're like, Nas?
And I was like, sure, you know?
We're like, okay.
Yes, but not where Nas is from.
I'm from Astoria, New York.
Yeah, dude.
We grew up in a very like safe area.
Yeah.
And Nas did not.
Did not.
Did not.
And then also the other side of it is just like
fucking Jamaica Queens and Hollis Queens,
which are not very, I don't know what they are now,
but like at the time were kind of rough too.
Yeah.
You know, but yeah.
And then what was the sandwich one that Jennifer Lopez did? Oh, there was like what's your go-to bodega order?
And she's like, all right ham and cheese on a roll orange drink. If you know, you know, no, I don't know
nobody knows
The fuck are you talking about?
Orange drink if you know, you know, here's here's the I don't know. Here's the only thing that I kind of would get
With her saying that defending Jenny from miss from the block a little bit. Yeah
When we were younger, I don't know if they have him now they had the barrel barrels
Yeah, so is that what she's referencing the orange barrel cuz that orange barrel drink was not drink
It was not it was sugar syrup basically. Yeah, so like maybe but also bro. Do you remember those sodas?
I forget what they were called
I think people called them Woolies or some shit and like I remember that if you if people saw you drinking them
They were like you're fucking gay because they like killed sperm. It's like yo, you don't like your sperm. You're gay
Like you killed your sperm you're gay for drinking it. You don't want more sperm in the world
Gay, I remember I was drinking one of those like were they know you like that that shit is gay
We're they're so be ones the ones that were like not like milky pink. It was like some shit
I've never even like I don't really know the bill
I just like wild first of all I don't even I used to drink a coca-cola before middle school every single day
so like the world was very the world is very very everyday but like the other thing that really aggravates me and
I can't take too much aggravation because I'm I now live in the Jersey Shore, but like
this whole like people when they hear like bodegas and they try to like make bodegas like it's like a thing when I went to
LA I
Stayed in a hotel and the hotel like mini-mart like their shop was called
Like the bodega. Yeah, and it's so fucking infuriating because I see like well They didn't have a cap
But like they had like, you know, like the like the like the white metal barred shelves and yeah
Yeah
And like because of like this whole like ocky way thing people think like they're
in on the joke bro a bodega was the let's let's let's be very clear these
places were the biggest pieces of shit because they failed every fucking health
code they would close every six months have to reopen under a new name because
we found out they were putting fucking you know, uh
Like cigarettes in the sandwiches. Yeah, like it's become this thing where it's like, ah, the bodegas are fucking awesome I go for the bodegas and shit like no you don't okay
No, you fucking know I got attacked by a dog in front of a bodega once bro
I I fucking almost got robbed and like two of them like
There they've become like glamorized and glorified because of the social you know
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right. I can't this, this Jennifer Lopez stuff is so funny to me because like
Everyone like she really leaned into like I'm just I'm just Jenny from the block and I'm not minimize a block Maybe she did have to you know run up and down to work and down the block
I also don't know what like fucking the Bronx was like in like the late 80s early 90s
I imagine not ideal right but
You know just just be yourself don't have to be like a version
of yourself that people want you to be oh wow that was beautiful
who said that Mickey Mouse I met I think actually oh yeah probably yeah I met
actually also I think the wheel and apology to Kate Middleton oh yeah you
know we were speculating on what was going on like the rest of the world take
a look at yourselves we want to just say sorry we do a or an AI version of that came out and said that she has cancer. So we're hoping that she has a speedy recovery.
A speedy recovery.
Hey, conspiracy TikTok.
Let this woman fight her battle in peace.
Also literally get a life.
Get a life.
We are very well aware because one of the biggest, I think, like things that Joey and I carry with us
is the ability to like see outwardly, you know, and like understanding the bigger picture.
And we're also very humble too.
Right.
But like.
And, and, and we smell good.
I would say so.
But like, we are aware that like the metrics, like the day our episode came out was when she had just announced that she was fighting
It's bad. Not good. We apologize. Yeah, but also
We at the time followed the sheep mentality. So who's to blame here the sheep or the shepherds?
We also couldn't well fair
We're just sheep. We're just two little bamba shape baby boy sheeples ready for a shearing. Oh
Dude what like you don't see how much like they get like so relieved when they get sheared and stuff like that
No, we talked about this and I'd I'd skip over shearing video. No, you should because they look so like they're finally like, oh
Bro, it's like getting into a cold bed
after a long day in jeans.
You know what I'm saying?
It's the same feeling.
Like what I imagine it is when women-
After a long day in jeans?
Yeah, like when women have to take off their fucking bras
after a long day carrying around two melons, you know?
Yeah.
It's just like a,
and that's what I imagine the sheep feel.
But don't bras help with the carrying of the load?
I mean the weight is still there dude, like it still hurts.
But wouldn't it be worse if it was just like, no I gotta like,
my shoulders are carrying the brunt if I'm just letting them.
Yeah but I imagine when you got big old fat tits.
Yeah.
When you put, when you're wearing a bra that picks them up,
it just feels like you have to sneeze all the time.
Oh I thought it would feel like you're wearing shoulder pads.
That too. You know what I mean?
Like you could feel something.
Yeah, like the confidence you have
like wearing a sports bra is kind of like,
who's pushing me?
Boom!
Yeah, you know?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Compact!
Yeah, like you're just like, you're fucking,
like you're walking like, you know?
Like you're a rock-em-sock-em robot or something.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know what I'm saying?
And we don't have boobs. No, we don't. But that yeah, yeah, like that. You know what I'm saying? And we don't have boobs.
No, we don't.
But that's, yeah, I thought that like, if you have really gigantic bae bobs, I feel
like, I feel like if you didn't wear a bra, it would be worse, no?
Because pull.
Well, I would imagine, I would imagine, I don't have massive tits. Right. Contrary to what you often say to me.
I don't say that. I would, I would imagine it's like pulling them up, it's just like, you know, just fucking, you know.
Yeah, like, here we go. Yeah, because if you're, if you're- Buckled in. Yes, exactly, exactly.
Like when you're strapped into a fucking rollercoaster, and you're like, I'm safer, but I'm still here.
I can feel the weight. Yes. Yes
Yes, I imagine if you're walking around which is fucking Bielsa bub
You know like exactly you don't know you need something to kind of hold you up. That is a Pokemon correct
Oh, it is actually a term used for the devil
Correct
Yeah, but having like like a smaller boob. That's probably a lot of fun
I mean, I don't know you know like the smaller boob girls would just walk around
they're like I'm barely wearing a shirt and just like
It's just not a big deal. No. No, I don't know
No idea what that is. No, you just kind of like it's just like whatever you don't have to worry about like the shoulders or the back
Are there you know what I mean? Yeah I guess. I don't know.
What do we know?
Nothing honestly.
Literally.
Yeah.
Not a clue.
You think?
Here we are.
I don't even know what I was gonna ask.
Something about you wearing a bra for a full day.
You know what we we probably should do we should ask.
Oh maybe we should Maybe we should...
Maybe we should wear tits for a day.
Yeah.
I'd tit it up.
But like, we have to wear huge tits so we could feel like...
Duh, dude!
Yeah, I'm not gonna wear them.
Duh! You think I'm walking around with small tits?
Hell no.
I need to feel like, you know, the pain in which big titted women feel...
Now let me ask you a question.
Okay.
You were throwing them back at me before.
Now your tits.
Question. Say it again? Oh, oh. Let me ask you a question. Okay. You were throwing them back at me before. Now your tits question.
Say again?
Oh, oh.
If you had huge tits,
you letting those things get fucked at Kingdom Come?
Oh, if I got, yeah.
If you got bangerangs.
Yeah, yeah.
If you got just fucking, just fucking 2AK Quattro Sietes.
Am I doing this, you mean?
Yeah, of course.
And you're letting them get banged?
Yeah, what am I gonna?
I mean, use them if you got them
You know saying you know I I
For the special ones, you know not everybody not everyone paying my tits
Well, if you got you got a you know supply and demand absolutely
You know you got a couple supplies on your chest. You need to make sure that the demand is fucking demanded
I'm sure there will be demand, but there were tits. Well. I've seen your bare chest. I feel like your tits wouldn't be cool
How are you basing that off of my chest show me your chest right now
Bare chest honestly my this well you got hair take the hair away. You've got you've got fucking
You got pinky white tits
Pinky white tits, so?
What do you need me to be we want to be caramel? I can't dude. I can't be caramel
What do you want me to do? I can only be pinky white did I ever tell you weird transition?
speaking of I
Was gonna say speaking of tits, but it's actually speaking of caramel
Did I ever tell you my dad told us to use Coca-Cola suntan lotion?
Bro, that is the most Colombian shit
I've ever heard in my entire life.
It is, we were at the lake house.
How?
Did he say pour it on your body?
Well, we were at the lake house one day
and you remember like the beach bum brown bottle
that had like the spray lotion in it?
My sister had used it and she was like, I'm so sticky.
What the hell? And she goes, dad? I think the suntan lotion is bad and he goes not suntan lotion
You know what we use in Colombia works like a chum Coca Cola
The fact that this man
Here's the thing wait did he put Coca Cola in it?
He poured out the bottle or like used the bottle of suntan lotion and took an ice cold
fucking coca-cola cracked that shit and poured it in is so
Absolutely insane. This is the most Colombian shit I've ever heard of in my life. He would use like
He's wearing and he was like coca-cola, bro, and then he would wonder why he was getting attacked by fucking bumblebees
Coca-Cola! Bro, and then he would wonder why he was getting attacked by fucking bumblebees and shit.
It was this summer, where there were like bees everywhere, and he was like, what the fuck?
You know, he was so mad.
He was like, dad, maybe because you're spraying fucking high fructose corn syrup up your fucking balls.
Say what the fuck?
What the fuck?
I swear to God, you can ask my sister. He had a thousand bee stings that's ever. Oh, he legit
Poured Coca-Cola. We were like dad. What the fuck is this? Oh my god Columbia. They use it
I was like I mean, maybe they do but doesn't make it less stupid. Oh my god. That's so funny, dude
Like the fuck it was a sticky fucking mess, and then he was wondering why there were just fucking hornets everywhere dude
everywhere
Guys fucking backwards you know I love that
My god
Our dads man. They're interesting guys. We should we gotta try we gotta try oh
fuck Dads man, they're interesting guys. We should we got to try we got to try
They're gonna come to a show this year for sure and we have to just rip them. Oh
It's been a joke to my dad has not been at shows
So when he is at a show forget about it done every time I tell him about the shows
One he asks if other people are gonna get invited. Yeah, and then he says to me he's like waiting for my cut
My dad says that too. I'm like for what it goes. Well, I have you fuck a says to me, he's like, waiting for my cut. My dad says that too. I'm like, for what? He goes, well, I have your fucking jokes of me.
Yeah.
And I'm like, all right.
I asked my dad about a specific show.
I was like, you're going to come to this one?
He was like, of course.
It was my idea.
I'm like, what?
I said that.
I was like, dad, we might, you know,
like, this is a show that we might do if you come to it.
Like, it's pretty crazy, right?
And he's just like, yeah, get tickets for these people like hey that relish with me and it's broke for a fucking hot
Bro he he was so confused
It's it's
God, I'm picturing your dad. Yo, honestly. I'm trying to picture being in Connecticut and being outside
I wouldn't be surprised if there were times my sister might know
Coca-Cola and dumps well
That's the thing is my sister might know better than I would because she was the one that would use this
Let you like this the spray tan lotion and shit like that not spray tan or suntan lotion
Yeah, and I wouldn't be surprised if she has a memory of my dad
Just full-on opening a coke drinking half of it and then pouring the rest down his back
of my dad just full on opening a coke drinking half of it and then pouring the rest down his back
guys you don't get it don't get it this man is a real human i love that yeah anyway uh before we get out of here again i'm going to reiterate thebasemeyard.com uh go buy some tickets folks
we're coming to a city near you a bunch of different cities for the rest of the year
up there, thebasementyard.com.
Go get your tickets.
We want to see you so bad.
Oh, yeah.
And you can check us out.
I mean, honestly, you know where to find us.
We're not going to plug our own stuff.
Go check out the shows, Patreon.
Get ready, the basement yard experience out the basement into your backyard coming soon,
babes.
You don't want to miss out.
All right?
Joey, love, liberty, lesbians. Lesbians. Love lesbians. coming soon babes you don't want to miss out all right Joey love liberty
lesbians love liberty and lesbians go follow the basement on tik tok and
Instagram that is all see you guys next time